[Sticky] Daily Food Diary! November 11, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Fri Nov 11 05:11:23 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5ce64i/daily_food_diary_november_11_2016/
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This is a daily food diary thread for November 11, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
[Help] How to deal with weight gain after an eating disroder?t
/u/Slightlysaltedhuman
Created: Fri Nov 11 04:58:29 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5ce4jc/how_to_deal_with_weight_gain_after_an_eating/
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If this is not the subreddit for this post please tell me where it should be.
TW : weight gain, bulimia, binging (and purging feeling)
I think I gained 40 pounds from the height of my bulimia to "fully" (tonight I purged after since the last time which was 4 months ago) recovering. Which the start was 4 years ago and recover probably 3 or 2 years ago.
I also rarely binged, I just ate typical meals and purged as much as I could after those. It's sick to think but when I had a weekly binge I would bring food in the bathroom so I could throw it up easier.
I was a fat bulimic (which is why my ex-anorexic nmom caught me purging more than once but never got me help, because I was fat/normal sized) and I'm an even more fat survivor.
I used to be so confident even at the same size this summer (I went to the beach in a bikini, I wore shorts, I wrote just a bralette and a skirt one day idk)
Like that weight gain as got to me a lot. Thinking I was a universally wanted and desired size to this unwanted/hated size.
I can't deal with it, like I can't wrap my head around it and I know I'll go back into the cycle of 1.5 years of bulimia and then recovering and gaining weight all over again.
Now I can get help, for free on campus but I don't want it. Idk I don't feel like I deserve it and I also like keeping it a secret.
The whole day after I purged I just realized I can start purging and stop being so guilty and for some sick reason I love that light headed, shaky high I get for even hours after I purge a meal.
Edit : some spelling
[Discussion] DAE have oddly specific goals/fantasies?
/u/namelessgia
Created: Fri Nov 11 04:19:59 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5ce01s/dae_have_oddly_specific_goalsfantasies/
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For example, I have a clear image in my head of myself walking into a particular library once I've reached my UGW to check out a book about EDs, and getting a sympathetic look from the library lady. I can picture the outfit I want to wear and all! I haven't been to a library in years, and the library I'm imagining is one that I've only ever been to once, but now that I've had the thought I'm super determined to do exactly that once I lose the weight. I've got a couple more like this but I won't ramble on, I'm just curious to see if anybody else has any really odd goals like this?
[Help] Please talk to me. I've locked myself in the school bathroom, because I'm too stressed about having lunch. I'm really not okay.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Nov 11 03:11:17 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5cdsb9/please_talk_to_me_ive_locked_myself_in_the_school/
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It's roughly 700 calories of pasta, but I just couldn't today. I've been in here for almost two hours. I'm just not okay. I dont even care what you tell me, I just need someone that understands me.
I'm not sure if this is allowed, but I couldn't think of anywhere else to go.
[Rant/Rave] At least we admit we're crazy.
/u/CowOffTheFarm [65" | 145 | 24.41 | - | F | GW 120]
Created: Thu Nov 10 22:16:18 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5ccsxw/at_least_we_admit_were_crazy/
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[removed]
[Thinspo] Hey, everyone. Time for some nostalgic Thinspo.
/u/FionaSeesInColor
Created: Thu Nov 10 20:16:20 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5ccag8/hey_everyone_time_for_some_nostalgic_thinspo/
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https://youtu.be/FFOzayDpWoI
[Thinspo] Thinspo album because I'm really needing it to get out of this binge, purge cycle
/u/jiuel1 [5'4"(barely yay) | 122.6 | 20.9 | -12 lbs | F]
Created: Thu Nov 10 19:11:04 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5cbz8y/thinspo_album_because_im_really_needing_it_to_get/
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https://imgur.com/a/qh2zq
[Rant/Rave] Home and other reasons to binge.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Nov 10 17:52:05 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5cbl9a/home_and_other_reasons_to_binge/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] shamed and embarrassed in front of all my friends
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Nov 10 17:47:31 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5cbki0/shamed_and_embarrassed_in_front_of_all_my_friends/
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[deleted]
[Tip] What to do AFTER a binge
/u/get-fucking-thin [5'5" | 142 | 23.63 | -10 | F]
Created: Thu Nov 10 17:35:22 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5cbia3/what_to_do_after_a_binge/
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Hey guys,
I fucked up. After many days of restriction, I binged. On the day before my weekly weigh in.
Yay.
Anyways, I've seen so many posts on preventing a binge, but I haven't seen very many on what to do *after* a binge. I put together a list that I think can help a lot of us on this lovely sub, so here it is.
- Treat yourself with kindness. I need you to promise me right now that you will NOT self harm after a binge. Treat yourself like you would treat a loved one.
- That being said, don't use it as an allowance to binge again.
- Remember that we are all human. We make mistakes.
- Drink drink drink. Drink water or green tea. Avoid coffee because it's dehydrating and may be a bit counterproductive.
- Eat a piece of fruit or snack on some fresh veggies. It'll make your body feel cleaner. I know that after I binge, I feel dirty and gross. Munching on a piece of celery or some grapes can help a lot.
- Exercise. Take to the cardio machine and do half an hour. I sometimes feel like after I binge, the damage has been done. However, exercising after a binge will a. Take off some of the damage and b. Make you feel better.
- Talk to your friends. Pick up the phone and chat.
- Post here! Get some support. You're never alone.
- Do NOT think that you're back at square one. You've worked so hard - this is just a teeny tiny setback. You're in control of this operation, and sometimes even the strongest people fall. Get back up. You can do this.
I love each and every one of you and I hope that this list will help you guys just as much as it helped me <3
[Rant/Rave] I just baked and threw away a cake
/u/Castoroilexperiment [5'6 | 105 | 29F| 17.68]
Created: Thu Nov 10 17:21:20 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5cbfs4/i_just_baked_and_threw_away_a_cake/
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I found this recipe http://www.foodiefiasco.com/healthy-texas-sheet-cake/#comment-91469 which claimed to have 50 calories a slice. I am dumb and I made it without verifying it in my fitness pal. I don't know how the recipe creator came to 50 calories for 1/12 of the cake when there's 1100 calories in just the flour.
My husband and kids had a piece. I tried a piece, I knew I wouldn't be able to stop so I dumped the entire cake in the trash. Then I pulled old gross trash on top of it so my husband wouldn't see. What a waste of cocoa powder and almond milk.
[Rant/Rave] I've started to dread being at home
/u/smallsmallersmallest [166.5cm | CW 50.8kg GW 44kg | 18.46 | -10.2kg | F]
Created: Thu Nov 10 17:09:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5cbdfk/ive_started_to_dread_being_at_home/
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Home is where the food is and where I'm at my weakest. When I'm at college it's so easy to say no to food and I don't even have to pay for it so it's not because it's expensive, I'm just not tempted and if I am it's very easy to dismiss. And then I go home and there's so much food in and it's all just there for me to eat and I have no control over what's in the house because I live at home still and ugh :( I just constantly feel like running away. I would go on walks but it's getting dark and the only places there are to walk around where I live are unlit and isolated and covered by trees and that's scary so I feel like I have nowhere to escape to, I have no car, there's nowhere to go in this village, just :( I hate that food is making me hate my own home. I wish I was strong enough to have food near me and be able to say no.
[Help] Best protein shake?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Nov 10 16:49:47 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5cb9ty/best_protein_shake/
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[deleted]
[Goal] another committing to a binge-free week thread, day 1!
/u/leatherhoff [5"3 | 130 | ftm (not on hrt yet)]
Created: Thu Nov 10 15:09:52 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5caq4u/another_committing_to_a_bingefree_week_thread_day/
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hi everyone! as the title suggests, i made a post yesterday inviting people to join me in committing to a binge free week. got quite a bit of feedback , which is great! heres to hoping we will all be able to succeed.
~~i was considering today as my day 1. ive got a lot of coursework to do over the next few days and because i prioritise my education over my mental health i forced myself to get some lunch so i could focus better. got some chilli chicken pasta and i felt bad about eating it all at first but im actually glad i did, cos it was really filling! i actually felt satisfied for the first time in ages, which was honestly felt a little unsettling cos im used to either being hungry or recovering from a binge... but its certainly not a bad thing! i had it about 11 hours ago and im still not too hungry. so todays been a good start.~~ WOOPS NVM GUESS WHO FUCKED UP ALREADY
how has everyone else's first day been? i hope youve all had a good start too :-) if not thats okay, you can start again tomorrow! no worries. we can do this. good luck and take care everyone <3
calling all who joined:
/u/smokesanddietcokes
/u/rainbowsunshinedust
/u/hellosex
/u/diekorrekturen
/u/IAMABaguetteAMA
/u/eboneezah
/u/victoria-stuff
/u/fluffydaffodil
/u/dnedna
/u/diet247x
/u/eeveecakes
/u/smallsmallersmallest
/u/TheMostExoticFlower
/u/glipglopsfromthe3rdD
/u/Rhyanon
/u/deanhipchester
/u/bonedust_pale
/u/bloodketosexmagic
/u/chrrie
/u/fringeandbinge
/u/water-coffee-tea
/u/Im_A_Whale_AMA
/u/concuidado
/u/fondletime
/u/dogfucker_420
/u/three_two_bone
/u/salt_skin
let me know if i forgot you or if you want to join in !
[Help] time-frame for losing 85 lbs?
/u/colour-of-sky
Created: Thu Nov 10 14:50:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5cam0e/timeframe_for_losing_85_lbs/
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[removed]
[Help] Struggling to gain again. Anyone have advice?
/u/WhatShouldIWearToday [5'5" | 104.2 | 18.35 | (Post Pregnancy) | F]
Created: Thu Nov 10 14:31:19 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5cai13/struggling_to_gain_again_anyone_have_advice/
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I'm looking for advice on how to gain. I last posted a progress pic at maybe 111lbs. My flair says 104, but I think I'm probably right about 99. (Haven't weighed in a few days.)
I have this weird obsession with staying under 100lbs. At this point, it's more of a numbers mindgame than a vision one.
I don't think I look as good or womanly anymore. I am now at the point where everyone asks if I'm okay. I don't like having that much attention/concern on me.
If I'm being honest, I think I look best at 115-125. I wish I could make sense of that in my head. Those numbers just SOUND fat to me, so I don't want to be there. I wear a size 2 around those sizes. I feel like size 0/23in waist jeans aren't slightly loose on me, then I'm fat.
Does anyone else have this problem? Knowing you look too thin but you're unable to let the scale climb? I've been trying to weigh myself less, but that actually just makes me more worried about food and I end up overlogging everything to make sure I don't overeat. Ugh.
[Rant/Rave] I love watching people make food. ❤
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Nov 10 14:19:26 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5cafj0/i_love_watching_people_make_food/
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[deleted]
[Discussion] Purging through work-outs
/u/hereitgoes_again
Created: Thu Nov 10 13:51:42 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5ca9sb/purging_through_workouts/
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[removed]
[Goal] More motivation to not gain
/u/slytherinsedona [5'5 | 115.0 | 19.1 | -25.0 | F]
Created: Thu Nov 10 13:41:29 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5ca7ne/more_motivation_to_not_gain/
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Since coming to college I've lost over ten pounds, and none of my clothes fit me the way that they should. As a result I feel even worse about myself, and finally got fed up with it. So today I took them all to get altered, and the alteration lady was pinning my clothes and asked me, "do you really think you're going to stay this same size?"
In response to you lady:
Fuck yeah I am.
[Rant/Rave] Its over
/u/K_iwi
Created: Thu Nov 10 13:40:39 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5ca7hh/its_over/
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Its a negative title for such a happy post <3
Today I woke up and had two slices of toast (90) with some PB fit (50). And i saw some left over halloween candies (a fun size snickers) and I thought in my head "I'm' going to eat that."
And I reached for it.
But something in me just *clicked* and I didn't eat it. Im tired of crying when I look at the scale. Im tired of being 126 on a good day. Im tired of not having control, the cycle of eating then hating myself then eating more and more.
Its over. I threw away the snickers, but even if it was there I wouldn't eat it. Im strong. I control what I eat. I feel free and light now that I'm restricting again. Theres nothing more empowering than saying no. Its comforting, in a way. Staying sub 800 feels safe, like wearing a cozy jacket.
I missed this.
[Rant/Rave] [rant] I can't eat anything without eating everything
/u/disbeetch [5'3'' | 140 | 23.7 | -34 | F]
Created: Thu Nov 10 13:35:47 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5ca6j5/rant_i_cant_eat_anything_without_eating_everything/
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I started off the day with a yogurt instead of my usual nothing, and it has led into a binge. I ordered a huge thing of pho for lunch, at the whole thing, and on top of that several handfuls of chocolate chips and a granola bar. And it's not even 3 pm yet. Fuck
[Help] I am a raging bitch when I don't eat.
/u/CowOffTheFarm [65" | 145 | 24.41 | - | F | GW 120]
Created: Thu Nov 10 13:14:19 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5ca1z9/i_am_a_raging_bitch_when_i_dont_eat/
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I've finally gotten good at skipping breakfast and lunch (or having something <150 calories. It's a lot easier to tell myself "no eating until after I get home from class. The only problem is that i'm a cunt to my boyfriend from the time I get home until I make something decent to eat.
I usually just want quiet and some time to myself, but we live in a tiny apartment (can't avoid him) and he's all over me from being deprived from human contact all day long.
Also, i'm starting to have a hard time quelling the late night munchies and going over my calorie goal by about 300 cals every day. Even with that splurge I'm below my BMR. It's a good excuse in the moment but I feel guilty about it the next day.
Halp?
[Rant/Rave] Odd Motivation
/u/Alexa1p [5'5'' | 110 | 18 | -10.7 | F]
Created: Thu Nov 10 12:15:17 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5c9per/odd_motivation/
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My boyfriend broke up with me last week. A few days later, he held me close to him, and whispered fiercely in my ear he wouldn't give up on our relationship, and we got back together.
Monday afternoon he told me he didn't love me like I did him, and we were over. He left me curled in a ball on my floor, sobbing. I felt like a piece of my heart was ripped out. I didn't see it coming, I was so happy being with him.
I'm a little worried at how easy it is to just... not care about eating. I'm trying so hard to take control of my life. I'm throwing myself into my textbooks, focusing on learning new ideas, and planning what I'm going to do with my life now that I'm being forced to move across the country and back in with my parents.
When I was dating him, I felt happy. I still hated how I looked in the mirror, but that somehow didn't matter as much. Now?
There's nothing stopping me from getting closer to a body I find beautiful.
[Discussion] Worried about Thanksgiving
/u/diet247x [5'3 | CW: 139 | -16 lbs | GW: 90 lbs | F]
Created: Thu Nov 10 12:01:53 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5c9mk1/worried_about_thanksgiving/
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I'm really dreading it this year. I've been maintaining a fatter frame for the past two years, but have recently slipped into the old ED mentality due to some work related stress. At this point, I don't want to fight my old tendancies because I really do need to lose at least 20 pounds.
My family has already noticed that I've lost a bit of weight, and I'm afraid they might be more aware of what I'm eating when I go home for Thanksgiving. Do you guys in the US get super stressed about this holiday? I'm trying to have a better mentality approaching it but it's giving me a ton of anxiety.
[Goal] I've gone a whole month without bingeing!!!
/u/antimeridian [mellon collie and the infinite fatness]
Created: Thu Nov 10 10:40:19 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5c958p/ive_gone_a_whole_month_without_bingeing/
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I'm so happy. I honestly don't know how I've done it, but I haven't slipped up once. Maybe the meds really are helping...I've never made it this long before. Just had to share!
[Other] I'm back?
/u/ooo5936 [5'6" | 128lbs | 20.47 | GW: <114 | -10lbs | F]
Created: Thu Nov 10 10:13:33 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5c8zhz/im_back/
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I guess I never really left, I just haven't posted/upvoted/commented in this sub in about 3 months.
I got married, moved, and have been on the job hunt. Since all of that... I've been diagnosed with depression. To add to the all the other stress.
My husband is gone for the weekend with some friends and I'm hoping to do a 72 hour fast to help me realize I *am* still in control over what I put in my body. Wish me luck! I've missed you all and your support.
[Discussion] Continuation of the face progress thread.
/u/gastastic [5'1 | 118.0 | 26F]
Created: Thu Nov 10 10:09:36 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5c8ypa/continuation_of_the_face_progress_thread/
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So I noticed a lot of people chiming in to say they have a round face and/or chubby cheeks. I've always felt this about myself too. It's my biggest insecurity. I had no idea it was so common here.
Which makes me think... is this another result of our disordered thinking and body dysmorphia? We can't all have ridiculously round faces and chubby cheeks, can we?
[Tip] Tip
/u/SkinnyBoy70 [| 5'3" | 115 | 19.66 | :(+30pounds | FTM Trans |]
Created: Thu Nov 10 10:03:38 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5c8xem/tip/
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https://i.redd.it/jcxs261fqtwx.jpg
[Discussion] Restricting and Dreams
/u/SanguineSmiles [5'4" | 126.9 | F]
Created: Thu Nov 10 09:52:34 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5c8v5h/restricting_and_dreams/
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Does anyone else get vivid dreams when they are restricting? Is it because your body is spending less time digesting so it can spend more time in REM?
If anyone has an explanation, idea, pr just want to share their own weird dreams then I'd love to hear it. I'll share mine in the comments.
[Discussion] What can I do before the gym
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Nov 10 09:00:39 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5c8kc4/what_can_i_do_before_the_gym/
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[deleted]
[Help] How to make Thanksgiving better for cousin with ED?
/u/acertaingestault
Created: Thu Nov 10 08:59:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5c8k5a/how_to_make_thanksgiving_better_for_cousin_with_ed/
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My mom grew up the second of six cousins. The oldest cousin is about 55, and for most of her life she's suffered from body dysmorphia which she's treated with binging and purging. Thinning hair, stomach ulcers, fake teeth, extreme weightlifting were the first signs I noticed as a kid, but as I got older I would hear her throwing up after meals and then watch her pile a second plate full of more than I would think such a petite woman could eat at all, much less for seconds. She and I probably see each other max twice a year, and Thanksgiving is one of those times. She doesn't know I know, and I want to make her feel more comfortable this year. Our family does a potluck buffet so I have little control over the menu. Do you all have any suggestions? Would she be relieved to have someone else know (I think all the cousins already do.) or would it just put a wedge between us? What forms of help or comfort would you accept in a situation like this?
[Other] I'm staring at a tray of free mini muffins. [Other]
/u/chicklet2011 [5'6" | 152# | 26% | -38# | F]
Created: Thu Nov 10 08:05:15 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5c89hj/im_staring_at_a_tray_of_free_mini_muffins_other/
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My Uni's library is typically a food-free safe space for me. But there are left over mini muffins from an event earlier this morning right across from me. I'm an IF kind of person, so I'm not supposed to eat until around 4:30 today. But they're right there and they're free. But they're filled with sugar. If I go take one I'm going to hate myself all day, and I'm already bloated and muffin-topping out of my jeans today.
[Discussion] Why I look at thinspo
/u/somanyjellyrolls [5'5" | 117.8 | 19.83 | F]
Created: Thu Nov 10 08:02:19 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5c88wr/why_i_look_at_thinspo/
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I was thinking about this the other day and thought I would see if other people feel this way. I don't really seek out pictures of thinspo, but I appreciate tasteful images being posted here. When I look at aesthetically pleasing photos, I'm really just hiding from reality. I look at the girl with the tiny body, protruding bones, meticulously chosen outfit, carefully positioned cup of coffee, and it appeals to the perfectionist in me. It's a snapshot of what I wish my life would be like, everything in order instead of chaos. But I also know what it takes to create an image like that.
Chances are, that girl in the picture also hates her body. It was the best shot out of hundreds, the one that was acceptable to show the world, but still never good enough. Maybe she clings to it, proud of capturing a moment that showed she is "okay, just fine, not sick at all, really!" It's not reality, but if I can convince myself that it could be, it helps, if only momentarily. I don't use her body as motivation, because I know that even if I looked exactly like her, it would still not be enough. Instead, I guess it is a bandaid for my anxiety. It's a way to pretend that if I try hard enough, someday my life could be picture perfect too.
[Help] For those who beat yourself up over the number on the scale like me.
/u/tattoosandcoffeee [5'4 | GW 108 | -12]
Created: Thu Nov 10 07:53:51 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5c87by/for_those_who_beat_yourself_up_over_the_number_on/
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http://www.womenshealthmag.com/weight-loss/weight-fluctuation-experiment
[Help] I'm not a low weight at all ( 122 5'7) but I've always had thick curly hair so shedding is normal but lately when I brush it there is a lot more breakage and strands falling out.. is there any way to prevent it?
/u/taiteisnotcool
Created: Thu Nov 10 07:17:37 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5c8199/im_not_a_low_weight_at_all_122_57_but_ive_always/
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https://www.reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5c8199/im_not_a_low_weight_at_all_122_57_but_ive_always/
[Help] How do I deal with constant cravings for unhealthy foods? Whenever I am hungry it is always for fried fast foods.
/u/wisdom626
Created: Thu Nov 10 06:45:55 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5c7vxh/how_do_i_deal_with_constant_cravings_for/
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https://www.iprevail.com/questions/how-do-i-deal-with-constant-cravings-for-unhealthy-foods-whe
[Sticky] Weekly Emotional Support November 10, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Thu Nov 10 05:07:19 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5c7hvk/weekly_emotional_support_november_10_2016/
---
We're almost all dealing with quite stressful things outside of our eating disorders. Whether it be complicated relationships, friends, university, work or other mental illnesses like depression, anxiety or OCD, we all seem to be having a rougher time emotionally and mentally than the general population.
Use this thread to post about your problems or ask for advice concerning things other than EDs/ED behaviors.
**As always, follow the sub rules when reading or posting.**
*****
Weekly emotional well-being and support threads are posted every Thursday.
Have any questions or concerns? Comment below, or [PM the mods.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FproED)
[Sticky] Daily Food Diary! November 10, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Thu Nov 10 05:07:11 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5c7hum/daily_food_diary_november_10_2016/
---
This is a daily food diary thread for November 10, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
An article about the inconveniences of being overweight. No.11 hit home.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Nov 10 04:30:49 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5c7df0/an_article_about_the_inconveniences_of_being/
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[removed]
[Help] Any Tips for losing actual fat when fasting and not damage your heart?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Nov 10 04:19:59 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5c7c78/any_tips_for_losing_actual_fat_when_fasting_and/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] food fucking up my lif per usual
/u/jrste310 [5 ft | 106 lb | 21.34 | -21.5| Female]
Created: Thu Nov 10 04:02:44 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5c7a5e/food_fucking_up_my_lif_per_usual/
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[removed]
[Help] How do you deal with hair loss?
/u/TheMostExoticFlower [5'4 | -50lbs | F]
Created: Thu Nov 10 03:50:18 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5c78un/how_do_you_deal_with_hair_loss/
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My hair is falling like crazy and I don't know how to make it stop. Is there something you guys have found helpful? Since I haven't been able to even slow it down I've tried to accept it, but I can't. I try to think it's just hair but I feel like I'm losing my femininity, my whole identity :'(
[Help] Support Idea.. (comments for details)
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Nov 10 03:21:31 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5c75si/support_idea_comments_for_details/
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https://i.redd.it/iou2vnqlqrwx.jpg
I want to start a diet
/u/loving_life0_0
Created: Thu Nov 10 01:07:30 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5c6ro0/i_want_to_start_a_diet/
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[removed]
[Goal] I asked my partner which dead celebrity they find most attractive just for kicks...
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Nov 10 00:22:47 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5c6mkj/i_asked_my_partner_which_dead_celebrity_they_find/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] I never knew I was this deep in
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Nov 10 00:03:55 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5c6k6e/i_never_knew_i_was_this_deep_in/
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Until now. I feel like I have to make a decision, my boyfriend or Ed.
And it's not a decision, I don't really have a choice. Ed will be around for much longer, has been around for much longer. I'd leave Ed if I could, but he's also the one I love.
I wish he'd understand.
[Rant/Rave] I have a "photoshoot" coming up with a friend who is probably 80 pounds soaking wet and I am going to look like a blubber whale next to her.
/u/fluffydaffodil [weight never stays the same smh]
Created: Wed Nov 9 23:53:47 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5c6ixk/i_have_a_photoshoot_coming_up_with_a_friend_who/
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I've also been stress eating like shit lately so i'm all bloated and gross.
When the pictures come out, I think i'm going to crawl inside a hole and die :(
Do you guys have tips on looking thinner in photos?? I know of the whole arm on hip, leg bent trick thing but that's about it...fml. Right now i'm just planning on fasting but I don't know if that'll help much.
[Help] The morning after binging
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Nov 9 23:42:04 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5c6hfw/the_morning_after_binging/
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Usually my body feels sore. I didn't purge yesterday, which I guess my teeth liked. But now my neck, back and stomach really hurt.
Does anyone else experience this?
[Other] [Other] My current lock screen
/u/mace__face [5'6 | CW:112 | BMI:18.08 | GW:108 | F -16lbs]
Created: Wed Nov 9 22:12:38 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5c659o/other_my_current_lock_screen/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/d6e15f4d973d46868c7e1df6d1c1123b?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=1ace635c8a788e4d0114e2bd3a4739b3
My current lock screen
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Nov 9 22:11:52 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5c655i/my_current_lock_screen/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/2371671d32854d27b2591e33cb8b3d71?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=43900676ee3acd314a728900faee1e40
[Help] Fasting headache?
/u/00110100-00110010 [5'4'' | CW 114 | UGW 104 | 19.9 | F]
Created: Wed Nov 9 20:58:04 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5c5tz9/fasting_headache/
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Hey all,
Fasting always gives me terrible headaches. Is there any way to counteract them other than eating more?
[Rant/Rave] I realized something today
/u/iwanttoblowaway [5'9 | 126.1 | 18.29 | 21 M]
Created: Wed Nov 9 20:08:03 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5c5lsl/i_realized_something_today/
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Today, I finally realized something. Realizing this is neither good nor bad, it just is what it is.
Today, I realized that I will never be fully content with *any* aspect of my life, *no matter how good it becomes.* Even if I get everything I want. I will always wonder where I would be if things were different. I second guess everything to the point of obsession.
I wish I was more attractive. Deep down, I guess I know that I'm not *unattractive*, but I would love to be at the level of attractiveness where I know I'm attractive - where I would make a Tinder because I wasn't afraid of being judged by appearance and I've never had a photo taken of me that I didn't hate.
I'll always want a tighter stomach. I'll always wish I was in better shape. So what I ran 4 miles this morning, and another 4 and a half this evening? If I were better, I could have run 10 and 10. What if I didn't have that cookie today when someone brought in a tray? Why wasn't I able to pass it up? What about all the alcohol I've consumed over countless nights out? How much better would my body be if hadn't ever had any of this?
I wish I was a better designer. Deep down I know my work is top notch, but that doesn't mean a thing when I'm constantly comparing it to other people's work that I wish was my own and feeling like it doesn't come anywhere near it.
I'm afraid I'll never be truly content in a relationship. It means nothing to me to be with an attractive, caring, loving person because what if I'm settling? What if I could find someone more attractive, caring, and incredible? It's because of this I'm afraid to allow myself to fall for people. I'll meet someone, and immediately question whether or not their the best I can do. What will other people think when they see us together?
On the flip side, I've realized that I'll never be completely secure in a relationship either. Deep down, I feel like I have nothing to offer to someone that she couldn't get, plus some more, from somebody else. I feel like my life is incredibly boring. Why would she stick around when there are millions of more interesting, attractive people out there? I want a wife and children but I'm beginning to be afraid that that's never going to happen for me. I'm only 22 and I know there's still some time, but I want to know what it's like to truly and completely love someone and be loved by them in return. Sure, my parents love me. But it's not the same thing. I'm afraid at this point, it hasn't happened yet so why should I have any belief in the idea that it might happen in the future?
What if I had more friends? Would I have more to do? Would I not always be the one making an effort to do things with people? I'm terrible at actively making friends. Every friend I have just sort of happened.
I could get everything I want, and I wouldn't be happy. I know this because I have most of what I've always wanted, material wise at least. If I've ever wanted anything, within reason, I've been able to get it. My life should feel like a dream honestly, but it doesn't. And I don't think it ever will. I will always wish I could do better.
[Help] protecting your skin
/u/iwillbesmall [5'6" | 119lbs | F | GW: 99]
Created: Wed Nov 9 19:10:50 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5c5c1v/protecting_your_skin/
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Let's face it. I'm not going to stop purging any time soon. How do you guys help protect and/or heal your skin around your mouth when it gets raw, red,or super dry ? Mine's just this dry mess.
[Rant/Rave] I'm so tired of all this
/u/k-w- [5'5 | CW 95 | F]
Created: Wed Nov 9 18:36:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5c563s/im_so_tired_of_all_this/
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Usually in the morning I have a Vega nutritional shake (170kcal and really yummy) to start off. Today I felt particularly shitty about myself so I just had two cups of coffee. I went to the outpatient program I go to during the day (not for ED), and I felt really fucking dizzy so I drank a lot of water and I still felt dizzy but I didn't want to eat anything because my stomach hurt and I didn't want to get fat and I didn't want people to look at me when I eat. I had to call my mom to come get me and drive me home. Then at home, I decided fuck it, and I did my dumb thing where I try to prove to myself that I don't really have an eating disorder. I ate a bowl of ramen without the flavor packet, a cup and a half of cereal with almond milk, and half a cup of ice cream, totaling to 550 calories, which I felt even shittier about. I started crying and went to the bathroom to throw up and I think I got most of it.
Fuck this. I fucking hate this. I'm sick and tired of everything. My eating disorder and my OCD run my life. I'm constantly worried that there are people secretly living in my house and waiting to kill me and that if I don't tell my cat that he's a good cat and I love him four times every time I see him, he'll die. All the people at my day program hate me and think I'm weird and awkward. I know this like it's a fact, but the staff keeps telling me that it's not true and they don't hate me, but I tell myself they're only saying that to make me calm down. And I can't just ask the other people there if they hate me and to be completely honest, because they wouldn't tell me if they did either. Everything is so tiring and stressful and my dad and his girlfriend are breaking up and she's moving out of our house and so are her kids, so there's way fewer people here and the door is unlocked a lot of the time because my brother lost his keys so there could be a person living here secretly and eating our food and no one would notice and they could kill me in my sleep. They could kill my cat too. There are plenty of knives in the kitchen. I sound fucking insane and I want everything to stop. This is a nightmare.
[Other] can we have another round of committing to a binge-free week (or more)?
/u/leatherhoff [5"3 | 130 | ftm (not on hrt yet)]
Created: Wed Nov 9 17:40:51 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5c4w32/can_we_have_another_round_of_committing_to_a/
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( Im not the one who originally started those posts, can't remember their username but I hope they don't mind me stealing their post idea :p ) see I've been binging constantly for at least a week and I feel if nothing else I can use social expectations/pressure from publicly committing to stop me from binging ahaha. That and I felt great last time I went a few days without binging and I want to get back to that because binging only hurts me and I want to prove to myself that I still have self control and can get over this :-) Comment if you wanna join me and I'll try to make a post every day in the same sort of style as the other ones!
[Goal] It's never too late to do the right thing. Everyone makes mistakes. You become stronger when you recognize what you did to mess up and change yourself. Never stop chasing your goals :3
/u/KajaIsForeverAlone [height:5'9 | CW: 135 BMI:20 | weight lost:25 lbs | Gender: F]
Created: Wed Nov 9 17:19:55 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5c4sa0/its_never_too_late_to_do_the_right_thing_everyone/
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Sorry if this isn't allowed here. I hope you all have a fantastic day <3 whether you're trying to restrict, fast, be binge free, not purge, or make it to your goal weight, eat normally, whatever your goal is, I hope you are able to conquer the day and reach your goal! Stay strong
[Discussion] Things you associate with your ED
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Nov 9 17:17:13 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5c4rs6/things_you_associate_with_your_ed/
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[deleted]
Does anyone have any good cal burning exercises for me?
/u/loving_life0_0
Created: Wed Nov 9 16:41:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5c4l8c/does_anyone_have_any_good_cal_burning_exercises/
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[removed]
[Thinspo] [Thinspo] Emma Roberts has beautiful legs . . .
/u/RedBull7 [5'7" | CW: 147 lbs | BMI: 21.45 | 5 lbs | M | GW: 140 lbs]
Created: Wed Nov 9 16:40:10 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5c4kwk/thinspo_emma_roberts_has_beautiful_legs/
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http://i.imgur.com/RQVQGKJ.jpg
[Rant/Rave] so much guilt
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Nov 9 16:19:22 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5c4h20/so_much_guilt/
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[deleted]
[Help] brusies everywhere
/u/jrste310 [5 ft | 106 lb | 21.34 | -21.5| Female]
Created: Wed Nov 9 16:19:17 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5c4h1e/brusies_everywhere/
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honestly i dont feel like i have been restricting much more than i have in the past. but i think my body is feeling the effects. also the less i eat, the less i want to eat. like taking a bite of food repulses me and makes me feel guilty af. im doing around 1000 a day + lifting (but eating alot of protein). but besides that nothing physical yet my legs are COVERED in bruises. Ive been taking calcium + vitamin c + iron- does anyone else know how to hide this or stop this? people keep commenting and i dont want anyone to worry about my eating. its finally gotten to the point where people call me skinny (still have flab tho so idk why)
[Rant/Rave] My college apparently hates me...
/u/hopelessly--hopeful [5'4" | puts whales to shame| -20 | F| 22]
Created: Wed Nov 9 16:17:37 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5c4gqr/my_college_apparently_hates_me/
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So up until today I was breezing through school with an entire suite to myself, I have a single room for one person, and then there is a double room for one or two people with a shared hallway and bathroom. This was nice for my restricting and fasting, as well as a private bathroom for the occasional b/p. I got an email today from res life telling me that I would have a new roommate for the rest of the year, and they move in tonight...I guess I can kiss my b/p sessions goodbye, and enjoy the ridiculous anxiety levels I will experience. I even tried to get them to put the girl somewhere else by telling them that I have a lot of anxiety and don't want to spend my senior year of college walking on eggshells and afraid of my roommate...I had a full blown panic attack just reading the email. So there goes my sanity and sanctuary...weird that we're all abut creating places to feel safe and now I don't even feel safe in my own room...
Size is the prize.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Nov 9 15:48:00 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5c4ay5/size_is_the_prize/
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[removed]
[Other] I made some lists
/u/smallsmallersmallest [166.5cm | CW 50.8kg GW 44kg | 18.46 | -10.2kg | F]
Created: Wed Nov 9 15:33:37 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5c483s/i_made_some_lists/
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http://imgur.com/a/l0NCw
[Tip] Clothes Shopping Tips & Tricks Exchange!
/u/deanhipchester [5' | 114.2 lbs | 23.29 | -28 lbs | F]
Created: Wed Nov 9 14:50:27 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5c3za6/clothes_shopping_tips_tricks_exchange/
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[removed]
[Tip] Clothes Shopping!
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Nov 9 14:48:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5c3yxe/clothes_shopping/
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[deleted]
[Discussion] not sure if this allowed but please, i just want to say something.
/u/ikillsouls [5' 2" | 104 | 19.0 | Ugw: 85 |19f]
Created: Wed Nov 9 14:31:03 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5c3v7d/not_sure_if_this_allowed_but_please_i_just_want/
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I just want all of you to know that if this election has/ will have a negative effect on you, I am here for you. If you need to talk/ rant I am here.
I know for a few it does not matter, but a lot of us feel in danger due to our race/ skin color/ sex/ gender/ sexual orientation, etc.
please stay safe, Im here, there are people who care.
[Meme/Humor (SUNDAYS ONLY)] Planning for Thanksgiving is ten times harder now.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Nov 9 14:21:03 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5c3t2o/planning_for_thanksgiving_is_ten_times_harder_now/
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[removed]
[Help] At what sort of BMI/underweight-ness do doctors start to interfere? Also does anyone have any experience with hypoglycaemia?
/u/Theremustbeafreeuser
Created: Wed Nov 9 14:18:26 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5c3sk5/at_what_sort_of_bmiunderweightness_do_doctors/
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[removed]
[Tip] I love Tim Hortons
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Nov 9 13:35:30 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5c3je7/i_love_tim_hortons/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] Turns out eating DOES have benefits. I still don't trust it.
/u/smokesanddietcokes [Everybody's Fool]
Created: Wed Nov 9 13:34:33 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5c3j6s/turns_out_eating_does_have_benefits_i_still_dont/
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Really bad cold virus since Monday morning.
Fasted Monday
Kept to below 500kcal yesterday.
Today felt so rotten and awful and hungry that I grazed all day starting at about 5am. Healthy foods mainly, but cals have gotten way high.
Feeling 10x better now, cold-wise.
Feel like eating is luring me into a false sense of security by helping me and making me think it's an alright guy, before stabbing me in the back and making me fat again.
[Discussion] Feeder documentaries
/u/420blazefiend [5'4'' | 119.05 | 19.83 | -22 | F]
Created: Wed Nov 9 13:19:56 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5c3g2m/feeder_documentaries/
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Anyone know any good doccies about feeders and obese partners?
[Discussion] Anyone fast until they reached a certain weight?
/u/cheeekyslug [5'5" - 19F - never good enough anyways]
Created: Wed Nov 9 13:15:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5c3f78/anyone_fast_until_they_reached_a_certain_weight/
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Anyone fast until they reached a certain weight? I've noticed that most my anxiety comes from time and schedules, but if I just do what I said I was going to do without any rules or regulations, I notice I do better and even get faster progress to it without much stress.
I mean obviously I know the precautions, I know how to listen to my body, but I miss the control of weight and my body that I used to have. I probably would of plenty of water, black coffee, some broth here and there. Has anyone ever approached weight loss this way?
[Rant/Rave] i just need to rant. emotional eating sucks
/u/LazyFawn [165 cm | 54.4 kg | 19.98 cuz im petty | 18 f]
Created: Wed Nov 9 12:20:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5c33fb/i_just_need_to_rant_emotional_eating_sucks/
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sorry about this whole wall of text thing. i'm not even sure i have an ED. like. i have to eat every day because of my medicine. so it's not real enough for me to stop that. i just need to get it all out and make that promise to myself. i hate hating myself after every meal i don't skip. i hate feeling guilty even though i ate the banana instead of the cupcake. idk. i just need to vent about my past week.
i took a break because i'm so embarassed about how much i've binged this weekend. it started friday. i was with friends all day. ate two slices of pizza and drank hot chocolate. it fit within 1000 calories for my day, but boy did it start a trip down hell.
saturday i met up with my old school for the whole day. i ate bread, more pizza, got shitfaced drunk (dooleys and cocio is the bane of my existence).. still within my tdee.
sunday was terrible. i had a huge hangover, i was tired, my mom was a fucking sack of brown stuff (as always) -> i cried for 40 minutes straight while baking a fucking peanut butter cake and downed the whole pan... yeah... but it gets worse. she then got mad at me for eating a whole cake, then i got fucked up sad again and ate popcorn and cookies. i hate myself
monday was also crap. i got sick. went home with friends. baked muffins. ate three. ate a shitload of pasta and bread. fml why
tuesday was okay right until i got home. i'd eaten my planned 212 kcal + an unplanned banana (tried not to give myself shit for this considering the days before it). but when i got home.. well, mom happened. ate what i estimate to be 800 kcal during dinner + a 300 kcal snack before it. great.
onto today. i ate 1098 kcal. i feel guilty every time i eat. i do well otherwise. i got up at 5 today. i drove a car today for the very first time. i went to school immediately after. i went to the doctors after that. i came home, cooked dinner. did homework. had to go sit with family while they eat. and now i'm here. this is literally the first free time i have in 15 hours, and the first thing that jumps into my mind is how much of a fat, pathetic failure i am.
but yeah. about tomorrow. which is really the point of all of this. i will fast until dinner. and friday, i will fast until dinner. and saturday, i will fast until dinner. and sunday, i will fast until dinner. i promise this, to myself, for myself.
tl;dr i am a shitty emotional eater, who cannot prioritize correctly. i will only be eating after six for the rest of this week. also, my mom sucks
[Rant/Rave] DAE hate when someone says shit like this
/u/sippingcherrycola
Created: Wed Nov 9 11:56:19 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5c2xyp/dae_hate_when_someone_says_shit_like_this/
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[removed]
[Help] Getting through a buffet dinner?
/u/scaredalternate [5'5'' | 163 | GW 160 | UGW 120 | -57lbs | M]
Created: Wed Nov 9 11:41:53 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5c2uzi/getting_through_a_buffet_dinner/
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My boyfriend's birthday is on Friday and I could not refuse going out with him and his family. He chose a Thai food all you can eat buffet dinner. I'm not going to make them pay $20 just so I can sit there and eat nothing because I'd probably feel even worse, and I also don't want to let my eating habits ruin a night that should be fun and carefree.
How can I get myself through this dinner with less guilt and anxiety?
[Rant/Rave] [Rant] This is hell. Too ill to be well, too well to be ill.
/u/purplejasmine
Created: Wed Nov 9 11:21:00 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5c2q9z/rant_this_is_hell_too_ill_to_be_well_too_well_to/
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Battling with ED behaviours, feel like I'm being dragged kicking and screaming into an ED.
Everything I eat I want to throw up. Forcing myself to eat a semi-reasonable diet feels like torture. All I want to do is starve myself. I either can't stand eating, or I forget I have this stupid compulsion, make something in a fit of "feed yourself be healthy" etc and feel horrific, and sit staring at it, and feel horrible, and make myself eat it, and then just desperately want to throw it back up and get it all out.
Except I can't, because what if my flatmates notice, and get pissed off at me, except that reason is why I'm not SI-ing so I have to do *something* so which will it be?
I never used to be like this. I used to just have occasional ED thoughts, and I'd make them go away, only every time they came back they were a bit stronger, I'd starve a bit longer, feel a little bit more fat even though I knew I wasn't, and now it's starting to take hold and I cannot stop it no matter how hard I try because resisting is *hell*.
I'll eat barely anything for days, then crack, want to be 'better' (despite not even having a disease, I tell myself) and stuff my face (but only eating as much as I 'normally' would). So I never seem to lose weight (although I can't tell, because I'm at uni with no scales. So I'm not weighing myself, so I can't have a problem. Even if I'd like to be every day). I know I'm not fat. I *know* theoretically I'm slim. But I can't see that, 90% of the time.
I can't stand this. I don't want to have an ED. So why do I feel like I have one?
[Rant/Rave] Rant: Jealousy over casual meal skippers
/u/Gabi_Cat [5'5" | CW:125 | BMI: 20.7 | -75 lbs | F]
Created: Wed Nov 9 10:24:55 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5c2dws/rant_jealousy_over_casual_meal_skippers/
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I feel like I really have fallen off the wagon since Halloween, esp since my birthday was two days ago. It seems like the next two weeks are going to be busy with family/holiday/birthday festivities which means more food and I'm stressed and I'm gaining...
Yesterday at a friend's house my friend's super skinny boyfriend finished off a pint of ice cream in about ten minutes and I said, "If I had your metabolism, I'd die!" but both he and my friend corrected me, so matter of fact-ly that it wasn't a fast metabolism but rather that he just doesn't eat breakfast or lunch and LONG STORY SHORT: why can't I be the skinny person who casually skips meals and gets no response instead of someone disordered who constantly messes up her eating habits... and gets no where.
TL;DR: I could be that thin, but apparently I lack the ability to just NOT EAT.
[Discussion] eating with the school nurse part two!!
/u/kennedyconnolly [5'9| 120 | 17.4]
Created: Wed Nov 9 09:59:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5c28du/eating_with_the_school_nurse_part_two/
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well, i just finished lunch. she barely watched me. i just put it in my pockets when she wasn't looking and threw it out when i left. phew that was easy. i was so stressed.
[Discussion] About those iffy posts...
/u/citrus_cunt [5' 9"| 142lbs | 19.5| +5lbs | F]
Created: Wed Nov 9 09:50:12 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5c26bp/about_those_iffy_posts/
---
As I'm sure a lot of us have noticed, there's been an increase in distinctly "proana" type posts here and I just want to point out that there *are* subreddits strictly for posts like that. I understand people want to post things like that here bc we're an active community but I promise if everyone took their shit and moved it to places like r/thinspocommunity and r/ProAnaMPA those subs would prosper and we wouldn't have to deal with it.
I also understand in many situations it's people who are new to this sort of social group and don't understand the mores and unspoken etiquette. That's okay, you're learning and you're eager to share with like-minded individuals. All I'm saying is maybe look into other posting options. 🙏
Thandie Newton?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Nov 9 06:46:53 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5c15re/thandie_newton/
---
[removed]
[Rant/Rave] (Rant) I threw up and he laughed in my face.
/u/raspberryfleur [5'6 | 127 | 20.5 | -30 | Female]
Created: Wed Nov 9 06:03:02 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5c0ydy/rant_i_threw_up_and_he_laughed_in_my_face/
---
Mobile no flair blah blah
Okay so I was on my 48th hour of fasting. I was at work. I decided to break my fast because I was getting nauseous to the point of vomiting, seeing white and I could barely keep a straight conversation.
I was working with one of my friends, and I had a small piece of caramilk and a handful of sour skittles. (It was the only "food" I had around for a while, I'm aware this is a terrible choice) Oh my god the anxiety was terrible. I had to purge it. I was gonna get fat. I looked sick to my stomach anyway so I guess that help with believability.
So I came back and he LAUGHS in my face saying "haha it's because you only eat sugar!! That's why you're so sick all the time!!" And then proceeded to tell his friend and everyone around him
Fuck you. I was in there forcing out some of the most fucking sour vomit and all you can do is make fun of me.
I want to cry ugh
[Rant/Rave] I'm never getting out of it, because bullies.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Nov 9 05:30:27 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5c0t3o/im_never_getting_out_of_it_because_bullies/
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[deleted]
[Sticky] Way To Go Wednesday November 09, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Wed Nov 9 05:09:03 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5c0pvc/way_to_go_wednesday_november_09_2016/
---
This is the weekly achievement thread for November 09, 2016.
This weekly thread is to spotlight those achievements you feel don't necessarily warrant their own post, but you'd like to celebrate all the same. This is not limited to specifically ED-related goals; share anything you are happy about having done or accomplished recently!
*****
Achievement threads are posted every Wednesday.
Have any questions or concerns? Comment below, or [PM the mods.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FproED)
[Sticky] Daily Food Diary! November 09, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Wed Nov 9 05:08:55 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5c0pun/daily_food_diary_november_09_2016/
---
This is a daily food diary thread for November 09, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
[Other] A long-read article someone else might relate to: the concept of the 'cool girl'
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Nov 9 04:02:52 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5c0gq0/a_longread_article_someone_else_might_relate_to/
---
https://www.buzzfeed.com/annehelenpetersen/jennifer-lawrence-and-the-history-of-cool-girls?utm_term=.rrqV7Q8kek#.vi4JGPjkmk
[Tip] Drink peppermint tea with 0 cal Equal after a binge and purge.
/u/kinaadman [5'1" | SW 210 | CW 110 | GW: 90 | F]
Created: Wed Nov 9 03:51:14 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5c0f70/drink_peppermint_tea_with_0_cal_equal_after_a/
---
It takes care of acid reflux and gets rid of the vommy taste in your mouth.
(In other news, I just purged 1kg of food out of my system. It was a pretty effective purge, tbh. I know it's sick, but I'm kind of impressed.)
[Rant/Rave] Want 2 die
/u/loving_life0_0
Created: Wed Nov 9 02:52:19 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5c07bi/want_2_die/
---
[removed]
[Help] Feeling weak after BM?
/u/scandinaviandreams [6'0" | 131 | 17.93 | F]
Created: Wed Nov 9 01:54:45 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bzygo/feeling_weak_after_bm/
---
Lately I've felt weak and light headed after a BM, and it usually takes a couple of hours before I feel fine again. Do any of you experience this?
[Rant/Rave] I can't believe I fucking ate all of this today
/u/iwanttoblowaway [5'9 | 126.1 | 18.29 | 21 M]
Created: Wed Nov 9 01:25:43 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bzt53/i_cant_believe_i_fucking_ate_all_of_this_today/
---
Ugh oh my god I hate myself. I had been doing so good for weeks. Then today happened. I had my free krispy kreme donut for breakfast. Literally first donut I've eaten in 2 years. I got a sour cream glazed cake donut. Then I ate some halloween kit kats (3 i think to be exact). Then for dinner I had a couple slices of pizza and 5 Oktoberfests and nachos watching the election with my friends. I just hate that I did all of that. I had my food planned for today and I blew it. And on top of all this other bullshit I didnt have time to go for a run
[Help] Out of Control
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Nov 9 00:04:44 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bzbf5/out_of_control/
---
[removed]
[Rant/Rave] Eh
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Nov 8 23:53:30 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bz8wz/eh/
---
[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] Woke up feeling very sick, went and ate my last Quest bar and a bunch of peanut butter
/u/smokesanddietcokes [Everybody's Fool]
Created: Tue Nov 8 23:29:07 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bz3pm/woke_up_feeling_very_sick_went_and_ate_my_last/
---
It's like I felt so hungry and rotten, I went down in a trance. Not a bingey trance, just a 'need some food nao' trance. 'Bunch of peanut butter' was probably about two tablespoons.
Meh. Spose that's what I get for fasting and then restricting the last two days whilst knowing I was sick
*~faceplants~* I seriously don't know if I could feel worse about myself right now.. although very strangely, somehow too sick to really care. What I mean is I know I feel terrible for eating but at the same time I am so exhausted it's like I can't dwell on it. It's just a vague 'Well, I'm a disgusting fatty and I'll never lose this weight and that's just my life' kinda feeling.
Wouldn't feel half as bad if I hadn't eaten myself stupid the last two weeks already
Still, such is life. I'll die eventually anyway and then none of this will matter
/grumpy
[Other] On the plus side, this election night has killed my appetite for the foreseeable future.
/u/TessTobias [5'5" | 120 | 19.7 | -22]
Created: Tue Nov 8 22:25:10 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5byqmd/on_the_plus_side_this_election_night_has_killed/
---
[removed]
[Rant/Rave] DAE have partners that just don't get it? This isn't about wanting to look like a fashion model!
/u/NaturalBlonde91 [5'6"|CW:148|GW:125|UGW:120|Female]
Created: Tue Nov 8 22:07:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bymu3/dae_have_partners_that_just_dont_get_it_this_isnt/
---
I've been feeling even more disgusting about my weight and body lately, and my partner has noticed. I know that she is nothing but loving and wants to be supportive, but her reassurances always come back to "you're beautiful, you're not fat, those models in the magazines aren't real and don't look like that all the time". Her compliments are lovely, but my issues have little to do with vanity or wanting to look like a VS angel. They stem from depression and low self-esteem, which I've had since I was a 7-8 year old that had exactly 0 concern about her size and weight. My weight is just a convenient thing I can focus on in my quest to fucking hate myself. I explained this to her and I think she heard me, even if she doesn't really get it. It just bugs me that so many people believe that EDs/negative body image is all about worshipping models in magazines and wanting to look like Natalie Portman. If only it were that easy.
Thanks for letting me rant. It helped me avert the 2,000 calorie binge I was positively itching to go on, and after eating like a pig today as usual I really didn't need to add that to my total calorie intake.
[Goal] Election day "game" for ED lovers
/u/fourfoldcat [5'4 | 113 |19.4 | -32 | F]
Created: Tue Nov 8 21:46:06 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5byi7q/election_day_game_for_ed_lovers/
---
Tonight I'm sitting with my friends while they drink to states that typically swing towards a certain party. So I decided to make my own version, ED friendly! If Clinton win, I will drink only coffee and tea for the next three days with no food.
If Trump wins, I won't eat for a week.
I'll know tomorrow :)
Edit: trump won, not even gonna lie, I hope this week kills me.
[Discussion] Discussion Cabbage!
/u/Castoroilexperiment [5'6 | 105 | 29F| 17.68]
Created: Tue Nov 8 21:45:37 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5byi4g/discussion_cabbage/
---
I am literally sick over this election, so I will tell you all of the beauty that is cabbage. I eat cabbage like it's going out of style. When i'm craving something salty, I dip the raw leaves in ranch popcorn seasoning powder. For sweet cravings, I dip it in splenda. Sometimes I bake it, sometimes raw. I know it sounds gross and weird. Cabbage is my bf4l
[Rant/Rave] My crush noticed me!!!
/u/RetailSlaveNo1 [🐷 5'2 | NB-dfab | CW: 163.6lb | 29.9/31.0 | UGW: 90lb | -26.4lb]
Created: Tue Nov 8 20:19:47 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5by0cx/my_crush_noticed_me/
---
[removed]
[Help] would a zero cal drink fast work for weight loss?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Nov 8 19:51:31 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bxv5u/would_a_zero_cal_drink_fast_work_for_weight_loss/
---
[removed]
[Goal] I'm so done with feeling out of control.
/u/salamanderqueen [5'9.5"| CW: 141.6 | SW: 180 | GW: 125 | -38 | F]
Created: Tue Nov 8 19:48:32 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bxulw/im_so_done_with_feeling_out_of_control/
---
The past few weeks have been a binge fest for me. In less than a month I went from 148.4 to 151. Had I just kept my self control I could have been below 140 by now. It's the worst cycle of self hate, eating more and hating myself for it, so dealing with it by eating more.
I'm starting a 4 day fast tonight, my longest yet. I need this, I miss feeling empty and clean. I hate not feeling like I have control over my body. I'm done feeling hopeless.
[Discussion] Who else feels this way?
/u/blueblissboy
Created: Tue Nov 8 19:41:52 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bxter/who_else_feels_this_way/
---
https://youtu.be/OTz7fkqs08Q
[Help] Yohimbine/Caffiene stacking
/u/k-w- [5'5 | CW 95 | F]
Created: Tue Nov 8 17:33:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bx5iq/yohimbinecaffiene_stacking/
---
I've been looking for appetite suppressants for a while and I've heard a lot about EC stacking here. You have to be 18 to get bronkaid over the counter, though, so I did some cursory research and came up with Yohimbine, which supposedly is a stimulant, appetite suppressant, and it does something with your metabolism (I don't know exactly) to make it easier to lose weight. Do any of you have experience with this, on its own or in combination with caffiene?
I ordered it on Amazon and it should be here tomorrow. I'm *kind of* impulsive /s
[Rant/Rave] My mom pinched my fat
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Nov 8 16:47:14 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bww69/my_mom_pinched_my_fat/
---
[deleted]
[Discussion] IP experience, a warning
/u/missciara
Created: Tue Nov 8 16:29:07 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bwsj3/ip_experience_a_warning/
---
I see loads of people asking about inpatient, what it's like, whether it helps, whatever.
tl;dr- it's shit.
it doesn't help, first of all. I've just been released from my third and worst hospital 'admission', the others being only a day or two for OD's and such.
I didn't even get told what was happening. I went in there after bloods showed my potassium was at 2.2, and I'd purged so much that I was literally ~about to die. I was placed on 24hr cardiac arrest watch, an NG tube slipped in my nose (though "slipped" suggests it wasn't incredibly painful), and put on a bountiful supply of various vitamins.
I asked to discharge myself the same evening; after finding out I'd be there overnight, I wanted to go home, naturally, but completely disregarded the whole 'could have a heart attack at any time' thing.
eventually caved, accepted it, and was wheeled to J2, the adolescent ward.
I won't bore you with the details, as my individual experiences with shitty nurses, crying over eating, being tube-fed and working so hard to get my bloody tube out and realising it was just as bad without it, are all symptoms of the real problem; the system is flawed.
I still purged while I was in there. in fact, they rejuvenated me into a healthy girl, and that simply encouraged me to do it more. the food was foul, I was forced to consume things that I was against by ethical means (meat, fish) and things that made me physically nauseous (milk, butter, egg, tomato, capsicum, couscous, ect.). they gave me no warning before they forced me into a meal plan of 2000 calories per day, and bumped me up to over 3000 three days after that.
I gained 5.5kg in a week and a half.
And I just got out, yesterday. and guess what? I do not want to recover. in fact, being in the hospital has made me want to refuse food, b/p and starve until I ~actually die.
So please, minimise harm as much as you can. IP is awful. being hospitalised and given a 50/50 chance of dying/living is scary. and the aftermath is life-long, family-ruining, marriage-breaking and devastating.
I'm not asking you to stop your ED's, of course it doesn't work like that, but minimise the risk, don't flush when you purge, make sure you eat a BALANCED diet even if that balance only comes to 400kcal a day.
ending up in hospital is a game changer. you'll never have freedom again.
oh yeah, and intravenous straight potassium hurts like a bitch.
What body type are you attracted too?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Nov 8 15:47:11 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bwk07/what_body_type_are_you_attracted_too/
---
[removed]
[Help] seeing sparkles
/u/jrste310 [5 ft | 106 lb | 21.34 | -21.5| Female]
Created: Tue Nov 8 14:58:22 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bw9fe/seeing_sparkles/
---
[removed]
[Rant/Rave] Does anyone else get told you look ill?
/u/BadBEDthrowaway
Created: Tue Nov 8 14:37:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bw4yt/does_anyone_else_get_told_you_look_ill/
---
190 cm tall 105kg 23 year old male.
Hello so, ive noticed that people constantly tells me i look tired, or if im okay, or ill and honestly its starting to get rather annoying man...
Back when i was 80kg before my serious back injury and binge eating disorder took over, i found out that people legit thought i had cancer and they didnt dare asking me because i looked so exhausted and well basically dying..
I dont know what the hell im supposed to do about it. so, i can easily chow down about 15.000 calories in 1.5-2 hours no trouble what so ever, and people tell me that i look malnourished but i was getting crazy fucking fat even then.
and then when i was actually eating way too little, "oh thats just the usual".. SHOOT ME..
[Rant/Rave] I'm so happy
/u/smallsmallersmallest [166.5cm | CW 50.8kg GW 44kg | 18.46 | -10.2kg | F]
Created: Tue Nov 8 13:39:12 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bvsbc/im_so_happy/
---
I'm ill right now and have absolutely no apetite for solid foods, I'm loving it. I mean, I somehow still worked in 500 calories of ice cream but.. Still. Apart from that I've only had soup so I'm at 700 for the day which is the lowest I've been at in a long time with all the binging and I'm just so pleased. Although I'm not enjoying being so bunged up and having a constant headache and all that, I kinda want to stay ill for at least a few more days so I can just live off soup and no one will be mad at me for not eating 'properly'. I'm listening to a song that one of the lines is 'You're slowly killing yourself' and I'm just thinking, fuck yeah I am. I feel so motivated right now I can't hold in my happiness :D
[Discussion] Restricting, rationalizing, and caring for self harm.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Nov 8 12:39:45 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bvf20/restricting_rationalizing_and_caring_for_self_harm/
---
[deleted]
[Discussion] Let's talk about face progress!
/u/frailraven [5'10 | CW 117 | LW 115 | F20]
Created: Tue Nov 8 12:39:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bvew6/lets_talk_about_face_progress/
---
So I have always had a round face. Constantly told I look like a "cute little " chipmunk. But I always hated my round face. Even at 128 lbs, my face was still ridiculously chubby.
Now that I'm losing more weight my face has become more slim and my cheek bones are way more defined (contouring has been way easier if any of y'all are also into makeup).
Do you guys gain/lose fat on your face? For me, it's one of the first places that I can notice I've gained or lost weight.
[Other] Maybe I'm the only one that didn't know this.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Nov 8 12:23:50 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bvbin/maybe_im_the_only_one_that_didnt_know_this/
---
[removed]
[Rant/Rave] eating with the school nurse
/u/kennedyconnolly [5'9| 120 | 17.4]
Created: Tue Nov 8 10:12:33 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5buh92/eating_with_the_school_nurse/
---
well, i lost like five more pounds (can't update flair, on mobile). and now my team is making me eat lunch with the nurse. i'm planning on putting food in my pants and pockets but i'm just so annoyed right now.
[Help] Eating at a deficit and think I look skinner but haven't lost any but gained 2 cup sizes?
/u/chocolatecoveredpugs [5'4| 118| 20.6 | -22lbs | F]
Created: Tue Nov 8 09:34:42 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bu8ti/eating_at_a_deficit_and_think_i_look_skinner_but/
---
[removed]
all the single ladies
/u/yikes_dot_com [5'6 | 111 | 17.9 | F]
Created: Tue Nov 8 09:32:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bu8dm/all_the_single_ladies/
---
[removed]
[Discussion] How do you handle things when you're sick?
/u/smokesanddietcokes [Everybody's Fool]
Created: Tue Nov 8 09:28:26 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bu7ca/how_do_you_handle_things_when_youre_sick/
---
I know "handle things" is a bit vague, but I didn't know how else to phrase it!
I came down with a horrible cold yesterday (THANKS BOYFRIEND!!1) and feel awful. Woozy and bleh and so, so very bored.
I'm also upset and stressed about eating. On one hand, I just want to eat soup and warm veg in the hopes I will get better quicker, and because my stomach is rumbly and I need warm comfort food of some kind when I feel so rubbish.
On the other, I've been maintaining/overeating for about two weeks, and while I thought I could handle it, I really wanted to get 'back on track' with my more comfortable habits this week (i.e fasting and restricting) and try to lose again. Moreover, with the cold, I am refraining from exercise (and couldn't go to the gym even if I felt up to it, I don't want to infect other people with my cold) which makes me feel like I shouldn't eat, because I should only eat if I have activity to fuel..
I feel ultra guilty for even considering eating, like I am simply weak willed. I feel really fat after the last two weeks and am desperate to 'reverse the damage'. And then, again, so *bored*..
Obviously I've been sick before whilst wanting to fast and restrict, but I was much less of a hungry person back then, and I was mainly sedentary any way - which is probably why my appetite was lesser in general. Now I am pretty active in general, rely on my activity in many different ways, and so I am bored, and feel fatter than ever, and my appetite right now is not my friend.. :( Just so much badness.
Sigh, so what do you do when you are sick? How do you handle your eating habits, do you change them, and what do you do to relieve boredom and make yourself feel better in general about everything? I have some stock cubes for veggie broth which are seeming like a comfortable idea. I really want to get better asap so I can get back to my usual, comfortable routine..
[Rant/Rave] "you're so small I can't picture you eating that much"
/u/fiddlydiddly [5'4 | 125 lbs | 21.9 | -115 lbs | F]
Created: Tue Nov 8 09:13:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bu429/youre_so_small_i_cant_picture_you_eating_that_much/
---
Ever since I lost my most recent 30 odd pounds I've been getting comments from friends and family on how "skinny" and "small" I've gotten. Most of my family is quite a bit bigger, so I never really take it to heart and just laugh it off.
Yesterday I was tutoring one of my regulars who is just this tiny thing straight out of highschool. We went off on a tangent at one point and got to talking about eating competitions (probably my fault lol) and I told her how I had completed one once that probably amounted to 8k+ calories. She thought it was crazy and said it's funny because I'm "so small" she can't picture me eating that much. My heart fluttered a bit and I just laughed in response, but it's the first time I've actually felt like it might be true? Like I might objectively be small to people now?
Sure, she could have been more focused on my height with that comment, but I feel I'm pretty average there and having previously been morbidly obese I just can't believe someone tiny like her would perceive me as small in any way.
Sorry, just had to gush! Wish body dysmorphia wasn't a thing so maybe I could see what she sees. :/
[Help] [Help] how much do you think this small vegan donut is? 12 oz tea for scale
/u/apricaught [5'3.5"| CW 118 | 20.70| -16| F]
Created: Tue Nov 8 08:54:49 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5btzp0/help_how_much_do_you_think_this_small_vegan_donut/
---
http://imgur.com/LtCLNpZ
[Rant/Rave] A bit gross and a bit TMI
/u/vhenah [5'7 | 133.6 | 20.85 | -86.4 | MOO]
Created: Tue Nov 8 08:13:35 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5btqtx/a_bit_gross_and_a_bit_tmi/
---
BUT I'm gonna power through and share this anyway. Senna Tea. SENNA TEA IS LITERALLY THE BEST. I can't use normal laxatives anymore, I can go normally (it just takes 5ever) but my body doesn't take to the normal dose anymore. I couldn't remember the last time I actually pooped yesterday so I picked up some Senna Tea at the store and let me tell you - it tastes like licqourice which is sorta gross but this stuff WORKS.
I actually lost like 2.5~ pounds of poop weight so bless the fuck up. It was honestly worth waking up at 2am with crazy cramps.
tldr; if exlax doesn't work and you're super paranoid about your body's waste related habits, go for that Senna tea.
I have to ask if it has 'diminishing returns' like ExLax does?
[Tip] Tip
/u/SkinnyBoy70 [| 5'3" | 115 | 19.66 | :(+30pounds | FTM Trans |]
Created: Tue Nov 8 07:46:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5btl6w/tip/
---
[removed]
[Help] Fixed my FitBit, need some pointers?
/u/citrus_cunt [5' 9"| 142lbs | 19.5| +5lbs | F]
Created: Tue Nov 8 07:26:22 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bth20/fixed_my_fitbit_need_some_pointers/
---
So im back to using my first-gen flex and I want to know what y'all think.
Should i connect it to MFP and keep using that or should I use the built-in tracking apps? Is one more accurate or are they pretty much equal?
Also does anyone want to be friends? I'm under as Citrus-Cunt per usual. 😁
[Help] Breaking a fast?
/u/Cosmoflower [168cm | 152lbs| 24.43 | 19lbs | F]
Created: Tue Nov 8 06:11:45 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bt3mx/breaking_a_fast/
---
(No flair, on phone - sorry!)
Hi guys,
Just need some advice. I used to be really not so bad at breaking a fast but lately if I do a fast I really struggle to break it without binging so hard I end up sick - maybe is a stress thing.
Anyway I was wondering how everyone else breaks their fasts without losing control and causing themselves harm??
[Rant/Rave] [Rant] I suck as a girlfriend
/u/plshealme [5'5 | 128 | 21.55 | -40 | 19F]
Created: Tue Nov 8 05:53:32 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bt0mh/rant_i_suck_as_a_girlfriend/
---
I need to rant/rave a bit because I feel like a terrible person right now.
So, I have a flight booked in December to go and meet my ldr boyfriend for the first time. I'll be spending Christmas and New Year's with him and his mom & stepdad and we have lots of stuff planned. I'll also be meeting pretty much his whole family in general and I am SO stressed out and nervous.
The pressure of wanting to appear nice and pretty and make a good impression has been making me go crazy, the past 2 weeks or so I've been eating everything I could find. I spent more money on food than I usually do in 2 months...
Due to that, I've been too scared to weigh myself, thinking that I've probably gone up to 65 kg from 60.6 kg or something. I just kept telling myself I won't weigh myself until December 1st, and based off of my weight (aka wether or not I'm below 60, and at least 58) I was gonna buy some clothes I badly need, I have two pairs of pants and maybe 5 shirts that fit me, and I wanted some nice clothes to make a good impression.
Anyway, this morning I caved in an weighed myself. 61.1 kg. I only gained 0.5 kg, that's around 1 lbs. I don't even know how that is possible, I've probably eaten more than 3000 calories a day for the last two weeks. It just doesn't make sense and now I'm scared my scale is broken. :/
The reason why I feel like a terrible person though is the following, my boyfriends dad and stepmom (who he is living with) don't want me in their house during christmas time. We were only planning on spending two nights there anyway, but it's still a slap in the face. My bf will be on christmas break during the time I'm there and his dad told him that if he 'wants to take 3 weeks off to hang out with some girl', they're going to kick him out. So now he is extremely stressed out and feels like shit and what's the only thing on my mind? Hey, I didn't gain a shitton of weight so there's still a chance I won't look super fat and gross when I visit him! Urgh. Why am I like this...
[Sticky] Self-care and Beauty Q+A November 08, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Tue Nov 8 05:08:56 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bsu0y/selfcare_and_beauty_qa_november_08_2016/
---
Eating disorders are real, complex, and devastating conditions that can have serious consequences for physical health. Use this thread to discuss harm reduction and beauty tips, plus suggestions on how to build back up the physical self before and after engaging in disordered behaviors.
Please be wary of false advice and information. Be sure to research the facts before taking anyone's advice, no matter who they are. Remember that diagnosing members is unacceptable. **Anyone looking for medical guidance should seek the opinion of a medically licensed professional.**
*****
Self-care and beauty threads are posted every Tuesday.
Have any questions or concerns? Comment below, or [PM the mods.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FproED)
[Sticky] Daily Food Diary! November 08, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Tue Nov 8 05:08:48 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bsu03/daily_food_diary_november_08_2016/
---
This is a daily food diary thread for November 08, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
[Help] so confused
/u/jrste310 [5 ft | 106 lb | 21.34 | -21.5| Female]
Created: Tue Nov 8 02:52:25 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bsdc2/so_confused/
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[removed]
[Help] Knoxville vegans?
/u/ashfaced88
Created: Tue Nov 8 02:49:44 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bsd1q/knoxville_vegans/
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[removed]
[Discussion] Those of you who log calories in an app like MFP, do you log foods you chew and spit?
/u/Fibreoptic_Calico
Created: Tue Nov 8 02:16:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bs9h8/those_of_you_who_log_calories_in_an_app_like_mfp/
---
Or do you just log a few of the calories to account for the few that are swallowed accidentally?
(On mobile, can't flair)
[Rant/Rave] After binging for the past two days
/u/xcris19x [5'3 | FATFATFAT | Fat | F | -13lbs | UGW: 90/95 |]
Created: Tue Nov 8 00:41:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5brz1f/after_binging_for_the_past_two_days/
---
After two days of binging (after FINALLY breaking my plateau of course) I decided to eat something simple (ramen) and purge it up. I'm not naturally a purger, I recently did it on purpose for the first time in years and haven't really stopped. It isn't exactly routine, not after *every* meal, but often enough.
Whatever, anyways! I ate my ramen really fast, I was kind of excited. It's a weirdly exhilarating thing for me, a whole special event sort of thing. Music and I clean my porcelain throne till it's shiny - you get the picture. But when I went to the bathroom fairly shortly after I finished and for some reason I couldn't purge.
So of course- of course since I couldn't purge, I instinctively react to binging more. What in the hell is fucking wrong with me? Does anyone else do similar things?
[Rant/Rave] Fasting for a month: Update
/u/ForeverEmptyInside [5'9"| CW:115 lbs | BMI 17 | LW:104lbs | M]
Created: Mon Nov 7 23:58:21 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5brtn8/fasting_for_a_month_update/
---
Well.. I failed.
But not because of lack of willpower, or anything.
I was in my dorm room, when I felt a little hungry. This was about day 5 of my fast. Naturally, I used water to suppress my hunger. Although I used a little bit *too* much water. I felt extremely light headed and dizzy. I collapsed. When I woke up I was completely covered in my own shit and vomit. My headache was surreal and my eyes were bulging. So I went to ER.
Electrolyte imbalance.
So....I'm dropping out of Uni. My parents want me to come home and "work on my health". Not sure if thats going to look like inpatient or outpatient. Fuck this. There is nothing to do in my home town. I won't be able to get back in until Fall 2017. That's almost a whole year now..
I'm 18. No job. Not a student. And moving back in with my parents.
Kill me.
[Rant/Rave] i hate feeling this delusional
/u/bvvvg
Created: Mon Nov 7 23:48:30 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5brscv/i_hate_feeling_this_delusional/
---
my mum saw a photo someone posted of me and sent me a message asking if i had lost heaps of weight. the scales say i have - close to 22 pounds - but i can't see it at ALL. i still look like the same disgusting fat mess. i wonder if it'll always be like this or if one day i might be able to see what's actually going on
[Goal] I WENT WITHOUT EATING TODAY!
/u/_skellies
Created: Mon Nov 7 23:09:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5brn31/i_went_without_eating_today/
---
[removed]
Another warning to those enticed by purging...
/u/wavvvybaby
Created: Mon Nov 7 23:07:20 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5brmqi/another_warning_to_those_enticed_by_purging/
---
[removed]
[Goal] I self harmed instead of binging.
/u/kpatable [5'9" | 135 | 19.9 | -1.5 | F]
Created: Mon Nov 7 22:06:05 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5brdiz/i_self_harmed_instead_of_binging/
---
Is this bad or good? /:
[Rant/Rave] Fucked up big time last week, trying to get back on track
/u/onlyroom_forthin [5'6.5 | CW:158.6 | 25. 22 | SW:170 | UGW:120 | F]
Created: Mon Nov 7 21:42:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bra0m/fucked_up_big_time_last_week_trying_to_get_back/
---
So last week I was at a HUGE event related to my future career. It was such a huge opportunity for me, I met so many people, it was amazing, and I definitely feel like I made some great contacts that will help me advance.
But I let myself use it as a crutch and basically ate the whole universe. I was between 1500 and 2500 calories EVERY DAY for like the whole week. Ugh, it was awful. I knew I was going to eat a bit more than usual because it was an exhausting event and I needed to keep up my mental energy to be able to interact with all these people. But I went way overboard. I basically hated myself every night and then went and did the same thing the next day.
I'm determined to get back on track. I joined the gym near my apartment this weekend. It's just a crappy Planet Fitness, but I just need to be able to do cardio since I don't feel safe running in my neighborhood. I was there for almost 2 hrs on Sunday and burned 800 calories according to my Fitbit (taking this with a huge grain of salt and not eating back too many calories, because no one seems to really know how accurate Fitbits are).
In other news, I am spiraling into a downward spin of self destruction and depression. If I don't get my shit together I'm going to start smoking again, which is not really that big of a deal but it was a HUGE deal for me to quit this summer. Ugh. Just been feeling like a failure.
[Thinspo] I really like this photo of me. (For a better quality photo visit my Pinterest Skinny70)
/u/SkinnyBoy70 [| 5'3" | 115 | 19.66 | :(+30pounds | FTM Trans |]
Created: Mon Nov 7 21:02:49 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5br3ip/i_really_like_this_photo_of_me_for_a_better/
---
https://i.redd.it/abvo0qx5lbwx.jpg
[Discussion] Supersize vs Superskinny TOTAL confusion
/u/notyourtoy [5'8" | 126 lbs | 18.95 BMI | -37 lbs | F]
Created: Mon Nov 7 20:04:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bqtif/supersize_vs_superskinny_total_confusion/
---
I know a lot of us watch this show. I have to ask.
They just said "he ate a minuscule 1300 calories a day. Approximately the diet of a 3-year-old child."
WTF
Like, I guess that's my question, haha. WTF?
This show messes with my head. But the superskinnies are great thinspo. And if they can get to those sizes on 1300 calories, why can't I? It's so fucking frustrating. I haven't exceeded 1200 calories a day in over a year (usually closer to 900-1000 and lots of exercise) and I'm still sitting here above the underweight line by a decent margin and it's madness.
[Discussion] Feeling shittier than ever
/u/kungpaola [5'2 | LW 109 | CW 137 | HW 149 | GW 105 | 26f]
Created: Mon Nov 7 19:48:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bqqkg/feeling_shittier_than_ever/
---
Long-time lurker, first-time poster...
I was only a few lbs from my goal weight a couple years ago and then I went through this depression with my parents' divorce where I just stopped caring and just started eating. As a result, I have gained back almost all of the 40lbs I dropped since graduating high school and have just recently started restricting again.
My sibling just got married this weekend. I felt okay about myself in my bridesmaid dress, since it hides a lot and I had on my Spanx, until I got to the reception and kept hearing relatives say things like "You look so good! You'd lost a lot of weight a couple years ago but you're looking much better these days!" and "The last time I saw you you looked too skinny, you look much better now!"
Why do people think it's okay to say these things? Thanks for reminding me that I've gained weight and lost control...
r/fitness advice gives me anxiety
/u/smallpaint [6'2" | 170lb | M]
Created: Mon Nov 7 19:39:34 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bqoww/rfitness_advice_gives_me_anxiety/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/831e7ec85b1c4c3db493184a0735a570?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=779ff4d94042da21a0a13ecc9ea4697c
[Discussion] My list of appetite suppressants
/u/get-fucking-thin [5'5" | 142 | 23.63 | -10 | F]
Created: Mon Nov 7 19:39:07 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bqott/my_list_of_appetite_suppressants/
---
- Coffee with a splash of skim/soy milk with a packet of splenda (~15 kcal)
- Green tea (0 kcal)
- Cinnamon/peppermint gum (5 kcal)
- Egg white (16 kcal)
- 1/2 apple with cinnamon sprinkled on top, heated in microwave (~40 kcal)
- Lemon tea w/ splenda (~5 kcal)
- 12 cherries (48 kcal)
Add more below - I could use some more :)
[Thinspo] Delicate [Thinspo]
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Nov 7 19:29:30 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bqn32/delicate_thinspo/
---
http://imgur.com/gallery/LAxCU?lr=0
[Thinspo] [Thinspo] Delicate
/u/get-fucking-thin [5'5" | 142 | 23.63 | -10 | F]
Created: Mon Nov 7 18:55:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bqh1u/thinspo_delicate/
---
http://imgur.com/a/LAxCU
[Rant/Rave] why the fuck did i just binge.
/u/slytherlin [5'5" | CW: 128 | GW:116 | NB]
Created: Mon Nov 7 18:35:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bqdeo/why_the_fuck_did_i_just_binge/
---
i don't even have anything to add lmao. whenever i binge i feel sick and gross and sleepy and unproductive and unmotivated. why do i still binge. why do i convince myself in the excitement of "omg i'm gonna eat this so much stuff!! :))) it's gonna be great!! :)))"?
it never does! i always feel gross afterwards! i'm literally so bloated and full and sick feeling! i hit a lowest weight yesterday so naturally i go and self sabotage the day after?? literally why.
[Rant/Rave] Self-destructive (rant, support needed)
/u/poisonandvenom
Created: Mon Nov 7 16:34:59 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bpq8f/selfdestructive_rant_support_needed/
---
Last year I lost 12kg in three months and I never felt better about myself. I was in control. Completely, utterly. No such thing as binging. No such thing as depressive periods where everything seemed grey and cold and awful. No such thing as, no such thing, no.
Christmas 2015, and everything went downhill. The girls I thought were my friends abandoned me, spread rumours behind my back, told me I was toxic. And I am. I was. I knew they were trying to lose weight and I even used some of them as reverse thinspo. I was an awful, awful person.
Since then... I swear, I eat 500 calories a day for two weeks and lose no weight, eat 1000 for one day and gain a kilo. And more often than not it's not 500/1000 - it's binges, piggish awful binges, greedy messy binges, and I hate myself so fucking much, I eat 4000 in one night and I lose myself for weeks and weeks, and I'm just so *tired*.
I'm still fat, really fat. And the girl who used to be my friend are losing weight faster than me, and is hanging out with the thinnest girl in school, the smartest girl in school, the girl I'm always 2nd to.
The worst thing is, I know what I used to do was unhealthy, but God I would so anything to get back to that mindset. When I was controlled, disciplined. When 800 calories a day was a luxury. When I could fast for 48hrs and forget entirely that I needed food to function. When I could burn every morsel of food off through exercise.
I feel like a fake. How can I say I have an ED when I eat spoonfuls of sugar and binge on bread and jam and make excuses to eat seconds and third at every meal? For every day I restrict there's a day I don't, a day I destructively don't. I smell bad when I binge, but I do it anyway. I don't have any friends, but I wouldn't even if I was thin, so what do I care? I am a fake. I had some kind of ED before but now I seem to be cured and I would do anything to go back to the way things were - to being hungry, to being sore, to being thin.
I'm 5'7", 63.5kg, and when I move I feel every bit of fat on me jiggle and shake. My hips, my legs, my arms. Prom is coming up. My mom wants to buy me a dress and I can't find it in my heart to tell her no guy wants to bring a girl as fat and ugly as me, inside and out.
I'm just so *tired* all of the time.
I want to be a different kind of self-destructive. I want to control. I want to restrict. I want to be a better, thinner, stronger person.
How?
[Help] Dealing with winter time changes?
/u/citrus_cunt [5' 9"| 142lbs | 19.5| +5lbs | F]
Created: Mon Nov 7 16:32:25 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bppqd/dealing_with_winter_time_changes/
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So it gets dark at like, 6pm now. And it throws off my body clock horribly. Im so used to eating around the way the sky looks, even tho it's silly. I want to start eating dinner before the sun goes down and then once it's pitch dark I feel like I can afford a small dessert. But by then it's only 7 and the bingeing starts?
Ugh. DAE struggle with this and how do y'all deal?
[Discussion] Dairy Intolerance?
/u/K_iwi
Created: Mon Nov 7 16:01:56 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bpjk1/dairy_intolerance/
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I've noticed these past few days that whenever I eat dairy I get really upset stomachs and end up with some nasty gas/poops (tmi but its proed lol). Its awful. Is this a thing that can happen from a restrictive diet? Has this happened to anyone else?
[Discussion] DAE feel attacked by others when they mention any kind of self-hatred or hatred of their body?
/u/dooksofireland
Created: Mon Nov 7 15:17:39 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bpacu/dae_feel_attacked_by_others_when_they_mention_any/
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I swear I don't even mean to, but I often find myself saying horrible things about my body in general/casual conversation with anyone....co workers, friends, bf, family...and I feel like then they try to question me, "well what are you eating? How often do you eat? Oh you're doing too much cardio you will just plateau!! Lift more weights" or when I was into lifting weights it was " oh do more cardio". I just constantly feel like I have to justify myself when they're giving me this unwanted advice (that I know is my fault for bringing up). I can't help that I feel this way about my body...I know it's completely my fault by opening up dialogue about my body but I do it even when I don't mean to...it's like I hear something about legs (I work at a gym so body talk is common) and I immediately blurt out "I fucking hate my thighs"...i wish people knew how much these things tormented my mind :(
Wondering if anyone else feels attacked like this daily because they can't contain talking shit on themselves :/
[Goal] feeling strong in the campus dining hall
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Nov 7 15:07:14 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bp7z5/feeling_strong_in_the_campus_dining_hall/
---
[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] WTF, brain?!
/u/life-as-a-loon [5'3"|105.2|19.15|F]
Created: Mon Nov 7 14:23:05 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5boy7c/wtf_brain/
---
I was sooo depressed about losing my hair. I loved my hair. It became thin and brittle and gross. It fell out. Being around my ex and actually like...eating....semi regularly it has started to look healthier again. I should be happy that I have shiny hair again, right? Except I feel like that means I'm failing. So I keep telling him I don't want to hang out so I don't have to eat. He always wants to eat. He always wants to make sure I'm ok. He actually cares about me, and I keep pushing him away so I can be alone and not have him harping on me. WTF is wrong with me?
[Discussion] DAE have weird underboob/ribcage fat or is it just me?
/u/invisible_lizz [5' | 107.8 | BMI:21 l GW 90| -36.2 l F]
Created: Mon Nov 7 14:09:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bov0p/dae_have_weird_underboobribcage_fat_or_is_it_just/
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I've always had them. Even at low weights. Goes along great with my B shaped belly! :'D
It makes me want to get a tummy tuck but I'll never be rich enough for that. Please tell me other people have this too.
[Discussion] 24 hour fast
/u/concuidado [4'11 | 83 lbs | 17.8 | -62| F]
Created: Mon Nov 7 14:08:05 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bousn/24_hour_fast/
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I decided to fast today because of my recent binges and then to just eat clean and restrict to 300 calories a day. Is a 24 hour fast pointless? I've been looking at posts and most people just do 3 day fasts but idk if I could do that.
[Discussion] State of the subreddit: Discussion Megathread!
/u/HereToStirItUp
Created: Mon Nov 7 13:58:14 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bosgw/state_of_the_subreddit_discussion_megathread/
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[removed]
I just got an idea about water stretching our stomachs?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Nov 7 13:46:26 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bopsu/i_just_got_an_idea_about_water_stretching_our/
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[removed]
[Help] Cheap/low cal to go snacks?
/u/bitterorbetter [5'5| 145| 24.1 | -15 | F19]
Created: Mon Nov 7 12:43:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bobht/cheaplow_cal_to_go_snacks/
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I need snacks for when I'm at school
That aren't just fruit and veggies. Only other thing I have ate rice cakes. Anything else?
[Discussion] Losing fat gaining muscle
/u/Dead_ugly19
Created: Mon Nov 7 12:26:06 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bo7m8/losing_fat_gaining_muscle/
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Hello, I'm new here and hoping this is a safe haven to chat.
Anyone ever had the issue of loosing weight but then replacing it with horrid bulky muscle? How can I stop this! I hate it . It makes me feel heavy and butch. Just want to take a knife and cut away.
[Other] i write whenever i feel depressed
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Nov 7 12:12:35 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bo4jm/i_write_whenever_i_feel_depressed/
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[deleted]
[Goal] "I didn't recognize you!"
/u/pcrnography [5'6" | -77 lbs | nb]
Created: Mon Nov 7 11:40:38 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bnx9e/i_didnt_recognize_you/
---
"You got so skinny!"
I'm gonna cry I'm so happy I thought I looked the same but this came from people who saw me last 30+ pounds ago... I'm at my lowest weigh ever right now and normally hate comments on my body but today it feels so good!
[Thinspo] I made a Pinterest
/u/SkinnyBoy70 [| 5'3" | 115 | 19.66 | :(+30pounds | FTM Trans |]
Created: Mon Nov 7 11:37:34 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bnwkd/i_made_a_pinterest/
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[removed]
[Thinspo] Thought of the Day: Focus on your good features!
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Nov 7 11:33:24 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bnvkb/thought_of_the_day_focus_on_your_good_features/
---
http://imgur.com/cvvqT7n
[Help] Keto ánd vegetarian recipes?
/u/Ultimatedream [5'6 | 124 | 20 | -41 | F]
Created: Mon Nov 7 11:21:23 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bnst6/keto_ánd_vegetarian_recipes/
---
My parents are willing to try vegetarian once a week. But they're very picky. They don't want to eat most meat replacements because they already feel they won't like it. I eat mostly keto, so it's gonna be a challenge, haha.
Anyone has some helpful recipes for me? Eggs are ok, cheese isn't.
[Thinspo] Can't concentrate on anything so I made a thinspo album instead!
/u/ikillsouls [5' 2" | 104 | 19.0 | Ugw: 85 |19f]
Created: Mon Nov 7 11:20:19 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bnslf/cant_concentrate_on_anything_so_i_made_a_thinspo/
---
http://imgur.com/gallery/iN7P0
[Help] [HELP] Binging every day, self-sabotage, fasting
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Nov 7 11:17:37 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bns00/help_binging_every_day_selfsabotage_fasting/
---
[deleted]
[Help] Tips on staying strong around family?
/u/oceanblue10 [5'9''| 167| 24.66|GW:120 | F]
Created: Mon Nov 7 11:09:49 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bnq6f/tips_on_staying_strong_around_family/
---
Im at university and usually go home for the weekends because i have a boyfriend and really need to just get away from the stress that is college. During the week I am here, i am on point! less than 500 calories a day! however, as soon as i get home that all goes flying out the window! my family does not eat healthy so there is nothing low cal in the house and they make me feel bad if i say im not hungry. My boyfriend also has nothing i can eat since he is super skinny and he thinks there is something wrong if i tell him im not hungry. It is just easier to give in than it is to fight them on why i dont want to eat. I feel like any progress i make during the week is lost as soon as i go home for the weekend. Any tips on staying strong or on avoiding the topic of food around family?
[Rant/Rave] I'm a fucking idiot. (anyone got any proed hangover cures...)
/u/invisible_lizz [5' | 107.8 | BMI:21 l GW 90| -36.2 l F]
Created: Mon Nov 7 10:34:07 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bni6s/im_a_fucking_idiot_anyone_got_any_proed_hangover/
---
Yesterday all I really ate was a big apple. But then since I'm such a fucking idiot I had 6 shots of vodka and now I feel like walking death. I really can't stomach anything.
I don't even know why I did this to myself since I've been doing so well cutting down the alcohol. (oh wait, I remember, I'm a fucking alcoholic).
Ugh anyway I already took an ibuprofen and I'm really trying to keep this Monster zero down. The best part? I'm on call in about 30 minutes. I hate myself.
[Intro] Introduction: I hate myself
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Nov 7 09:12:14 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bmzq8/introduction_i_hate_myself/
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[removed]
[Help] Purposely skipping a period
/u/Weazin_the_Ju-uice
Created: Mon Nov 7 08:56:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bmw9z/purposely_skipping_a_period/
---
I am taking the type of birth control pills where the last week is inactive pills. Taking the inactive pills triggers my period. I know that I am able to skip these pills and start a fresh pack of bc without any risk of medical complications.
My question is, will this affect my weight/water weight/bloat at all? Does anyone else do this to skip periods?
Edit: Thank you for the replies. It's good to know that other people do this too!
[Goal] "Anorexic Attention Whore"
/u/c_marier [5'6"| 112.2 18.18 | 22F]
Created: Mon Nov 7 08:34:10 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bmrsf/anorexic_attention_whore/
---
So I made the mistake of posting several full body pictures of myself on Imgur (fully clothed, I should point out. In snug jeans and a tank top). The intention was to send the link to an internet bud who would describe my body back to me in honest, neutral terms to help with body dysmorphia struggles. I figured that having just created an account for this purpose, no one else would accidentally stumble across the pictures and whatever if they did, it isn't like I was in my underwear or something.
Flash forward two minutes and I'm checking to make sure the album uploaded correctly. It did. And there are upwards of twenty comments. More every time I refreshed the page. It was something of a nightmare. Almost deleted the album but decided fuck it the damage was already done.
Read through the comments because I'm an idiot and don't know how to internet. Most of them were about whether or not they'd bang me etc. Whatever. I'm old enough not to really care about anonymous dickheads. And then one of the comments caught my eye: "Anorexic Attention Whore."
I have never been more flattered in my life. Anorexic? Really? An internet stranger called me anorexic? But I'm not that thin and barely underweight and you could hardly see my bones and my thigh gap is minimal. Anorexic? I know it's super messed up and it's the internet - the commenter was trying to exaggerate and be obnoxious. But I'm so pleased.
I am an awful human being.
[Discussion] Share your favorite shows to binge watch...extra points for thinspo
/u/daeboo [5ft1/79lbs]
Created: Mon Nov 7 08:07:27 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bmmdm/share_your_favorite_shows_to_binge_watchextra/
---
So I'm in an utterly trashed state emotionally and need some sweet sweet binge watching for the week (that isn't supersize vs superskinny, haha).
What do y'all watch when you feel shitty?
[Rant/Rave] Bad night (mental) + Nurturing spouse
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Nov 7 07:41:31 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bmhf7/bad_night_mental_nurturing_spouse/
---
[deleted]
[Thinspo] [THINSPO] inspired by /u/Rikicarvu: Lets do a music video based thinspo thread!
/u/justanotherbrunette [5'7" | 140 | 22.63 | -5 | F]
Created: Mon Nov 7 07:35:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bmgan/thinspo_inspired_by_urikicarvu_lets_do_a_music/
---
https://www.reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bmgan/thinspo_inspired_by_urikicarvu_lets_do_a_music/
[Discussion] Happy Monday. Today will be rough because carb/sugar withdrawal but I'm relieved to be back. How are you?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Nov 7 07:04:53 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bmaq9/happy_monday_today_will_be_rough_because/
---
What's new...my boyfriend visited this weekend and on Saturday I really didn't do too bad! I restricted all day until our special cooking plans Saturday night (empanadas - but baked, not fried). I ate an average amount of empanadas (but we downed two bottles of champagne). It's whatever, I had the best night ever with him.
Sunday....started with a 700 cal dunkin donuts breakfast sandwich (Wtf I haven't had a DD breakfast sandwich in...years). Then I felt "ruined" and once my boyfriend left, I picked up my nephew for the day. We got pizza, candy, popcorn (went to the movies) and then when I got home I had chicken tenders, the rest of my nephews candy (a whole package of starburst sour gummies, about 30 jolly ranchers) AND a can of soup, 4 slices of buttered bread (heavy white bread), spoonfuls of peanut butter, and I know I'm forgetting things. I mean, it was the kind of binge where I felt so sick I couldn't move but kept eating.
So, today is already hard. Acid reflux, gurgling stomach, bloated. But, it's Monday. And Monday is going to be hard. I'm sipping my black coffee. I have an apple and a banana packed.
I know I will feel tired most of the day, I know I will crave carbs and sugar like no other. But tomorrow will be easier. And Wednesday I'll be back 100%. Manic restriction, healthy emptiness. Can't wait to hit the gym too. I'll turn this 'excess energy' into muscle...right? :'D Yes. I will. Just, excited to be back. Binge-days feel like hell and getting back feels like relief.
How are you today? IT IS A NEW DAY, A NEW WEEK :)
Edit: So far, so good. I feel "empty" again using 1 banana, 1 apple, black coffee, and A LOT of water. I have my intake for the night laid out and I have plenty of distractions. I'm feeling empowered and positive. I hope your days are going well! <3
[Discussion] DAE have a problem with self-sabotage?
/u/salt_skin [5'4" | CW 134lbs | BMI 23.45 | GW 90 lbs | F]
Created: Mon Nov 7 07:00:34 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bma0l/dae_have_a_problem_with_selfsabotage/
---
it took months to get past my plateau, but now that i'm losing again, i find that i sabotage myself by binging anytime i lose any weight, even when i'm not hungry. it's like a part of my brain is like "you did it! you can eat now!" but that defeats the purpose! especially when i'm not even close to my goal weight. it's extremely frustrating to constantly have these setbacks because i've been working too hard to lose weight to gain it all back.
[Help] I have nothing more to give
/u/goddamnroommate [5'6" | 143.8 | 23.30 | -50ish | F]
Created: Mon Nov 7 06:39:26 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bm6e2/i_have_nothing_more_to_give/
---
Im feeling extremely mentally taxed. The idea of having a store of mental resolve and meting it out as you go through your day really resonates me. I find when im not stressing out in other areas, I'm able to be very successful in my ED. I wont binge (a huge problem for me), i can string together multiple days of low restriction and the weight just falls off.
But because of this election, im feeling constantly triggered, and i dont really use that word lightly. Ive also experienced rape/sexual violence and trump's language and actions around it and the subsequent support he receives is invalidating and just generally the worst. Ive backed myself off of at least three panic attacks where it feels like my throat is constricting and im just auffocating under the weight of existance. Those only happen once every two months or so for me. This thread on reddit about the legality/morality of a 15yr old girl being able to have sex with her uncle (by marriage) who is 47 years old is destroying any faith i had left in people and going outside, i find it so hard to make eye contact with people knowing that reddit is a decent microcosm of very real thoughts and beliefs.
So im just dying. It's almost 9 am and ive had 380 calories. My goal for the day is 500 and i have to have lunch with my mom. Im just exhausted and so tired of being a woman and just plain existing
[Rant/Rave] My mom tried to bribe me with shoes
/u/scandinaviandreams [6'0" | 131 | 17.93 | F]
Created: Mon Nov 7 05:23:14 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5blurn/my_mom_tried_to_bribe_me_with_shoes/
---
She has been exceptionally pushy about my weight lately, even though I try to dismiss her worry as silly.
Today I was shopping with her and tried on a pair of $260 timberland shoes, I was hesitating about buying them but my mom was like "if I buy them for you, could you consider putting on a little weight?"
I was flabbergasted. Wtf. I told her once again that my weight is no reason of concern. She ended up buying them for me anyway, but I don't know if I can wear them now without feeling guilty...
[Sticky] Weekly Stats Update! November 07, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Mon Nov 7 05:14:33 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bltkf/weekly_stats_update_november_07_2016/
---
This is the weekly status thread for November 07, 2016.
The weekly status thread is to help motivate our users, and to eventually see how far they've come! Be it for weight loss, weight gain, or maintaining- everyone is welcome. Previous updates are archived [here.](http://www.reddit.com/r/proED/wiki/archives)
Please include the following information (with all necessary units of measurement):
* Height:
* Current weight (CW):
* Highest weight (HW):
* Lowest weight (LW):
* Goal weight (GW):
* Ultimate goal weight (UGW):
* Weight lost (WL):
* BMI: ([Use this to calculate your BMI](https://people.maths.ox.ac.uk/trefethen/bmi_calc.html))
* Age:
* Gender expression:
Here's a handy-dandy copy/paste of the above format:
* Height:
* CW:
* HW:
* LW:
* GW:
* UGW:
* WL:
* BMI:
* Age:
* Gender expression:
*****
Status threads are posted every Monday.
Have any questions or concerns? Comment below, or [PM the mods.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FproED)
[Sticky] Daily Food Diary! November 07, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Mon Nov 7 05:14:25 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bltju/daily_food_diary_november_07_2016/
---
This is a daily food diary thread for November 07, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
[Rant/Rave] Freaking out
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Nov 7 04:23:21 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5blmz7/freaking_out/
---
[deleted]
[Help] I need to relapse or kill myself.
/u/faebun [5'6 | 125.6lb | 20.35 | -38.8 | NB]
Created: Mon Nov 7 03:54:06 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bljk3/i_need_to_relapse_or_kill_myself/
---
One of the two needs to happen. Disclaimer: i'm drunk.
i'm sitting outside smoking and shivering my ass off because that burns calories. good start.
i'm 2 pounds away from being fully weight restored and i fucking hate it. when i'm on cam, people regularly ask me if i'm pregnant. nope, it just takes about a year for recovery weight to redistribute! nice!
i can't live like this. something has to change.
i can't self harm because then i wouldn't be able to work, people would see it and when your job involves being naked there's not really a way to hide it.
i had a great day today, but fuck me anyways, even when the rest of my life is going great i'm a mental fucking mess.
please let me stop hurting. please stop pushing me towards recovery, i told everyone i wasn't ready for it but they made me. i can't take this any more.
[Goal] Huge step forward.
/u/aerienne [5'5" | 142.6 | F]
Created: Mon Nov 7 02:53:20 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5blcsn/huge_step_forward/
---
First off, the first week of November was great! I hit my goal of under 600 every single day. I'm supposed to weigh myself today, but started my period and think it would be best to avoid the scale until next Monday.
Best new: I successfully was prescribed Wellbutrin again! I'm in France and they only prescribe it to help people stop smoking. I was really nervous about asking for it, but said I took it without problems last time and she said no problem. I have a 3 month prescription in my pocket and I'm so happy. I have zero appetite on it and the weight fell off last time I had it.
Better news, I actually do use it for depression and this is my first ~real~ winter and I think SAD is a very real possibility for me. This will help so much and I practically skipped home after my appointment.
I hope everyone has a wonderful week! Thank you for letting me share my good news!
[Help] "You are a failure, and failures eat their feelings" - ED brain found depression and it's ganging up on me.
/u/CowOffTheFarm [65" | 145 | 24.41 | - | F | GW 120]
Created: Mon Nov 7 01:58:00 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bl707/you_are_a_failure_and_failures_eat_their_feelings/
---
That's all. I'm gonna cry over my homemade fillo dough pizza pockets now.
[Discussion] Does scratchy voice ever go away?
/u/asfdsfksdjf
Created: Sun Nov 6 22:49:47 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bkl08/does_scratchy_voice_ever_go_away/
---
It sounds like I have a vocal fry everytime I talk now.
[Goal] Trying my first 24 hour fast to make up for the weekend.
/u/epasternack [5'7" | CW 127 | GW 120 | BMI 19.9 | -33lbs | 22 F]
Created: Sun Nov 6 22:23:10 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bkhh1/trying_my_first_24_hour_fast_to_make_up_for_the/
---
So I ate high cal this weekend but not even enough to bust up my weekly goal. In fact, I am still under my weekly goal. But for some reason having normal meals makes me feel like I'm stuffing my face consistently. It's so tempting to get back on that train but I am so focused on reaching my weight goal that I need to be super strict. So I'm doing a 24 hour fast starting 9pm Seattle time on 11/6 and ending at 9pm on 11/7. I figure if I make this post, it's official and I have to do it. I'm allowing myself to have milk in my coffee, but other than that, I'm going to try to abstain from actual calories until it's over.
My big weakness is eating when I'm bored and normally during the week I'm too occupied with school to be sitting at home doing nothing, but this weekend I went out to breakfast with my BF and I was home a lot so.... there ya go. Bored eating.
Anyway here's to my first fast and here's to hoping it works out. Electrolytes, water, coffee, EC stack. Here we go.
My 133 pound prison
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Nov 6 21:21:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bk8ju/my_133_pound_prison/
---
[removed]
[Help] moving gracefully
/u/smallpaint [6'2" | 170lb | M]
Created: Sun Nov 6 20:49:17 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bk3l3/moving_gracefully/
---
This is a major point of self hate for me-- I move like a goddamn clown. Like, a (starting to be) thin clown, but still. I'm not coordinated, I trip over myself, and none of it is in a cute or endearing way. The main thing I want from being skinny is grace, but it's nowhere in sight.
The other day I went to a gym with mirrors facing the machines and considered rigging a gallows from the treadmill I was on. *I can't move without looking like a freak,* and I had to watch myself gangling along for over an hour. Disaster.
Anyway, advice? Or do I just walk less, smile more?
[Intro] I'm back. I think.
/u/SkinnyBoy70 [| 5'3" | 115 | 19.66 | :(+30pounds | FTM Trans |]
Created: Sun Nov 6 20:06:52 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bjwrm/im_back_i_think/
---
I was on here a lot in the beginning of the year then I went though recovery and I went from 85 pounds to 115. My goal is to be 70 pounds.. eh not really it's way less than that but 70 is realistic for me. I am female to male transgender.
I'm back. I think.
/u/SkinnyBoy70 [| 5'3" | 115 | 19.66 | :(+30pounds | FTM Trans |]
Created: Sun Nov 6 20:06:50 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bjwre/im_back_i_think/
---
[removed]
[Rant/Rave] I drink too much. And it scares me. And it's stopping me from reaching my GW. And I don't know what to do.
/u/frustratedwithfat [F | 5'7" | SW 160, CW 133, GW 123, UGW 113]
Created: Sun Nov 6 18:37:50 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bjhh2/i_drink_too_much_and_it_scares_me_and_its/
---
I don't know. I'm literally drunk right this minute. Like the title says, I drink too much and it's stopping me from reaching my GW. And I know I shouldn't be drinking so much. Or eating so much. Or exercising so not-at-all. I have a lovely therapist and he helps and is aware of my drinking. But I don't know how to regain control. And even if I do regain control, I'll just use that control to not eat. I'm in law school. Law school is hell. It's just a bunch of people drinking/using drugs to get through it. I don't know what to do. I'm just 10lbs from my GW and have a wedding in 3 weeks for which I'm a plus-one for the super hot guy (and my former best friend/one-time FWB) who rejected me when I got fat. This is a great time for me to buckle down and look gorgeous in my dress. But I can't because this is my 6th shot of bourbon. Please tell me I'm not a failure and that I'm not doomed forever.
[Rant/Rave] I FINALLY WEIGHED MYSELF Y'ALL
/u/Eldritchwhore369 [5'7" | 106 | 16.8 BMI | -19 | F]
Created: Sun Nov 6 18:29:02 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bjfse/i_finally_weighed_myself_yall/
---
Okay, I should probably wait until there's a stickied thread for victories but I just couldn't wait.
I FINALLY got paid, and I finally bought a scale. It's not a great scale, but I'm not terribly concerned with accuracy right now, just getting a good ballpark for my weight.
While opening the packaging, trying to arrange the scale evenly on my bathroom floor, and peeling off my jeans, I was full of anxiety. My intake this month hadn't been stellar, but I'd been regularly restricting, fasting, and exercising. I've refused to try and properly estimate my weight lately. Without a scale I'm pretty much useless. No idea what my body actually looks like.
One deep breath, followed by another.
*Your weight does not define you as a person. You've put on a little muscle lately. Any fluctuation is reversible.*
On and on, bouncing around my skull as I fidgeting from one foot to another, goosebumps prickling in the freezing bathroom.
I'M 110lbs you guys! Officially underweight again. This is with food and drinks in my stomach, so the true weigh in will be tomorrow.
I can't believe it. I still feel huge. But I took out my goal jeans (An Aéropostale 0 Super Skinny) and I CAN PUT THEM ON. They're still to small to fasten, and I've got half an inch of butt fat sticking out the top (I have a disproportionately large butt), but a month ago I couldn't even get them over my thighs.
It almost brought me to tears. I had to share. Holy fuck y'all. Holy fuck.
[Discussion] How do you guys deal with the headaches/lightheadedness/brain fog when restricting?
/u/iwanttoblowaway [5'9 | 126.1 | 18.29 | 21 M]
Created: Sun Nov 6 17:59:04 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bjab1/how_do_you_guys_deal_with_the/
---
https://www.reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bjab1/how_do_you_guys_deal_with_the/
[Tip] my no. 1 tip to live by
/u/get-fucking-thin [5'5" | 142 | 23.63 | -10 | F]
Created: Sun Nov 6 17:26:24 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bj4eo/my_no_1_tip_to_live_by/
---
Eat as though your bf/gf or your crush is watching. Would you binge if they were standing right there?
This has gotten me through so many moments when I was ready to binge/give up. Hope it does the same for you <3
[Intro] Reasons to be thin
/u/get-fucking-thin [5'5" | 142 | 23.63 | -10 | F]
Created: Sun Nov 6 17:10:25 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bj1a7/reasons_to_be_thin/
---
[removed]
[Thinspo] Thinspo: the women of Friends
/u/mimidudette [5'8" | CW 160 lbs | GW 150 | UGW 125 | 19f]
Created: Sun Nov 6 16:56:20 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5biypy/thinspo_the_women_of_friends/
---
Friends is my go-to depression binge-watching-in-bed-and-not-moving show, & I have SO much love for Monica, Rachel and Phoebe. Although the show is old, I feel like I relate to a lot of their money/job/life struggles, and obviously they are super fashionable and gorgeous! The best form of Friends thinspo is watching the actual show (I swear it should be renamed to Friends and Also, an Homage to Small Waists and Beautiful Collarbones and Shoulders), because seeing them in motion makes you really appreciate just how freaking skinny they are, but I've made an album of images as an homage to these three super cool ladies and thought I'd share :)
Album: http://imgur.com/a/2cpwy
[Help] Having troubles ending a fast
/u/_skellies
Created: Sun Nov 6 16:51:03 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bixpn/having_troubles_ending_a_fast/
---
I've been fasting for the last almost 6 days and it definitely feels like I need to break it... I don't want to binge but I need something substantive in my stomach. I'm weak, having troubles with walking, can't focus, and I'm sooooo tired.
The thought of food is completely revolting. Even smelling it makes me gag. I was able to keep down maybe half an egg this morning but it was so hard. I've been drinking tons of water and I'll drink some broth later to get something in me but I have no idea what else I'm going to do until my mind just decides it's okay to eat again.
[Other] [Other] I feel violated and disgusting
/u/mace__face [5'6 | CW:112 | BMI:18.08 | GW:108 | F -16lbs]
Created: Sun Nov 6 14:33:34 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bi7q7/other_i_feel_violated_and_disgusting/
---
Sorry to post this here, I don't know where else I can go. It's long, feel free to ignore.
I'm an American girl living in Jordan and before coming here I was warned about harassment. The cat calling, creepy words whispered as you pass a guy and other shit- that's a daily occurrence and I've dealt with it, but today is the first time anyone has touched me.
I was walking home from buying veggies and it was in a place where he and I were the only two there. I was walking up the stairs and he was walking down and he grabbed my ass as we passed. I say grabbed, it felt worse than that- just utterly violating idk how to explain it. I turned around and started yelling at him (in English bc apparently my Arabic goes out the window when I'm stressed) and told him I was going to call the police. He didn't even look scared. That was the worst part, the sick, amused look in his eyes and I see it every time I close mine. I wish I had hit him but I couldn't think straight and I was worried he might do something else, he was way bigger than me.
Then the short walk back home I had a panic attack, the first in a very long time. Now I feel a kind of shame for how it made me feel, if that makes sense. Like there are poor girls who have been raped and worse and I'm here losing my shit bc I got groped on the street. Idk, I feel pathetic and weak. And when I got home I had planned to eat my meal for the day but the thought of food made me sick- that's a plus right? Wrong. Bc my fucked up brain decided that not eating was my choice to make and not something to do bc of this asshole so I over corrected and ate more than twice my calorie allotment for the day. It's all fucked up. I'm all fucked up. Fuck.
[Help] DAE family's comment on their weight all the time?
/u/charredsouls
Created: Sun Nov 6 13:10:02 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bhqwz/dae_familys_comment_on_their_weight_all_the_time/
---
Hey there, I've been a lurker for a while on this sub. You guys are seriously awesome -- it's so nice being able to have a safe space where you're not going to be judged. I've struggled with an ED all my life in various forms, and I've been purging for a few months now. I've lost about 15 pounds in the last 2 months (I'm 5'11'' 140 pounds), so I wasn't 'big' before but have lost enough weight for other people to start noticing.
Yesterday I was at a family event and multiple people were commenting on my weight. Some said "you need to eat more" and others were commenting on being able to see my hip bones through my pants. There was food and others commented "we're going to make sure you eat." Obviously, I was extremely uncomfortable, considering I myself don't even like discussing my weight, let alone in front of family/strangers... Not to mention it's completely inappropriate to be commenting on someone else's body like that without their consent. I laughed it off and tried not to react, but inside I was going crazy.
To anybody else who has dealt with this, how do you react? Of course I don't want to freak out and make a scene, but I also don't feel I should have to consistently ignore what they say.
[Goal] Anyone want to join me in a binge free week? Day 7
/u/goodvibeswanted2
Created: Sun Nov 6 12:40:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bhkz6/anyone_want_to_join_me_in_a_binge_free_week_day_7/
---
Let's do it! Whether you've done it all seven days, some of the days, or you're just discovering this post, let's make today binge free!
[Discussion] tattoos as motivation
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Nov 6 12:36:17 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bhk26/tattoos_as_motivation/
---
[deleted]
[Discussion] "Woe to you, you who are full now, for you will be hungry."
/u/Comeheredia
Created: Sun Nov 6 12:28:17 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bhifi/woe_to_you_you_who_are_full_now_for_you_will_be/
---
I just got back from church today and that was part of our bible verse (Luke 6:25). It made me start thinking about my binge eating disorder. When I binge I can spend upwards of $100 dollars on food a day. If I had control of my BED I could use this $100 dollars on someone who actually needs food, or I could save it up and provide for my future self. I just feel really selfish right now and I want to change.
(sorry about the religious thing, I usually don't talk about it online, but this verse really spoke to me and I thought it might help someone else.)
[Intro] Lame Ass (and very late) intro
/u/faithfulbones [5'0" | 113lbs (GW 98) | 21 | -71 | F]
Created: Sun Nov 6 12:18:01 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bhge5/lame_ass_and_very_late_intro/
---
So, I've lurked here since February, and I think commented a few times but for the most part just lurked. I've had a history of disordered eating that started as (surprise!) a teen. I gained a bit more confidence (read: fat rolls) once I entered adulthood, and even more when I became preggers. I had my son in February, and very quickly started restricting heavily, which is why I started hanging around this place with all you lovely people. I've lost wayyyy more than all my pregnancy weight but I still have more that I want to lose. My biggest problem right now is motivation to keep going. I always make the excuse that I've lost so much weight, so I can afford to let my self eat X.
Long story short, I need to hold myself more accountable, so here I am, being active and shit :)
So, obviously, I'm a mom. I'm engaged to an amazing guy, i am a very very very anxious person, and I'm a special ed teaching assistant at the middle school level. I think that about sums me up lol
Also, I'm on mobile, so sorry for not using flair ❤️
[Discussion] DAE "If I eat this sandwich right now, I don't have an ED"
/u/three_two_bone [5'3" | hw: 139 | cw: 114 | gw: 95 | 19F]
Created: Sun Nov 6 12:15:06 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bhfsl/dae_if_i_eat_this_sandwich_right_now_i_dont_have/
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Sometimes I tell myself in my head that I'm I can "prove" I'm not disordered by eating something normal or not logging a meal or something like that. Of course, I proceed to either not touch the thing or eat it & then cry about it. Clearly normal behavior, folks. I feel like this is weird, but if anyone else does it I'd find them here. This resonate with anyone? ://
[Discussion] DAE listen to the weeknd when fasting or restricting?
/u/goddamnroommate [5'6" | 143.8 | 23.30 | -50ish | F]
Created: Sun Nov 6 10:12:21 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bgrz8/dae_listen_to_the_weeknd_when_fasting_or/
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I swear, their style of music is my favorite thinspo. It's otherwordly/the sound i feel when im way too drunk or fucked up and i love it to detach from reality. Do you guys do that? Do you have any similar artists?
[Help] Plateauing over and over and over again HELP meltdown
/u/bobthebagqueen
Created: Sun Nov 6 10:10:28 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bgrl8/plateauing_over_and_over_and_over_again_help/
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Guys I am at my wits end
I lost the first 60 pounds easily, 2-3 pounds a week no problem. Then I hit September. The weight just keeps getting stuck. I'm maybe losing 3 pounds a month. I'm spending 2-3 weeks at the same weight. I'm not even a normal BMI range yet so it shouldn't be like this
I eat 800 calories a day. I don't snack. I weigh every single thing that goes into my mouth. What is wrong with me? What am I doing wrong? I try not eating and literally gain 2 pounds. I was in the hospital for dehydration a few weeks ago so now I'm definitely drinking enough, probably more than I need
Please help me guys, I'm honestly having a meltdown
[Discussion] Let's talk best protein:calories ratio bars!!
/u/Rikicarvu [5'8" | 117lbs | 17.53 | -23lbs |]
Created: Sun Nov 6 09:58:01 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bgp5e/lets_talk_best_proteincalories_ratio_bars/
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*Preface:* Reading this back I sound a bit like a frantic maniac, which I'm going to put down to the EC stack I just necked for the first time in months, I hope you can overlook this :P Also please double check my maths and methods because numbers are not my strong suit!
I have recently jumped into the world of protein and am keen to find the Holy Grail protein bar, i.e. shit tonnes of protein with minimal calories. I'm going to share the few different bars I have tried and would love if you guys could tell me about your faves as I am a woman on a mission! A mission to get super skinny but also with some abs and a good bum and basically look like I belong in the Victoria's Secret Angels line up (because I'm sure one product can do all that for me!)
So, first off I bought the **Bounce Peanut Protein Blast Ball** (say that 5 times quickly!), which was an impulse purchase from Boots with no research. 12 balls cost £19.25, and are 207 kcal with 14g protein.
14/207=**0.06 grams of protein per calorie**.
19.25/12=£1.60/ball, 1.60/14=**£0.11 per gram of protein**.
I found that these had a really good flavour (just don't expect them to be as delicious as actual peanut butter), and I actually started looking forward to 'treating' myself to one, which helped cut down the cravings for totally junk calories like chocolate and ice cream (and crisps and biscuits and pies and chips and sweets and...)
**THEN** I ordered some **Grenade Carb Killa** bars in *Fudge Brownie* flavour. 12 bars for £19.35 off Amazon UK, 215 kcal with 23.3g of Big Poppa.
23.3/215=**0.10 grams of protein per calorie**
19.35/12=£1.61 per bar, 1.61/23.3=**£0.06 per gram of protein**
These haven't arrived yet so I can't review the taste, if anyone has tried these let me know!
**SO**, to tide me over whilst I waited for the Grenade bars to arrive, I wandered round Holland and Barrett and picked up some **PowerPlus 52% protein Bars** in *Cookies and Cream* flavour. You can get 24 bars for £30.95 from Amazon uk. Each bar is 165kcal and packs a whopping 26g of the good stuff in em.
26/165= **0.15 grams of protein per calorie**.
30.95/24=£1.28 per bar, 1.28/26=**£0.04 per gram of protein!**
These do taste *suuuper* weird. In fact the first one I ate I nearly gagged, they taste like shit. They have a weird, almost petrol-like smell to them??! However the second one I ate went down fine, not good tasting but not gag-worthy, and I reckon I could get along with them in the long term, especially with those banging stats!
I hope these Grenade bars taste absolutely delicious otherwise I'm going to be kicking myself for not getting the PowerPlus!
Any of bars people have tried? I'd love to hear about high fibre bars too!!
[Thinspo] Alyona Ponomarenko Mini Albulm ♥
/u/Rikicarvu [5'8" | 117lbs | 17.53 | -23lbs |]
Created: Sun Nov 6 09:20:02 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bghyj/alyona_ponomarenko_mini_albulm/
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http://imgur.com/a/TxtLf
[Thinspo] The only music video I keep going back to over and over again for thinspo...and I don't even like the song!
/u/Rikicarvu [5'8" | 117lbs | 17.53 | -23lbs |]
Created: Sun Nov 6 09:04:29 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bgezo/the_only_music_video_i_keep_going_back_to_over/
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=idr01rpcSfM
[Rant/Rave] You know what really grinds my gears
/u/00110100-00110010 [5'4'' | CW 114 | UGW 104 | 19.9 | F]
Created: Sun Nov 6 08:28:49 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bg8od/you_know_what_really_grinds_my_gears/
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That extreme discipline is admired in sports but not in eating.
"Wow, he ran an ultra! That's impressive!"
"You're fasting for a *week?* That's creepy."
*sigh*
What do you do to "re-up" your motivation?
/u/dbishop22
Created: Sun Nov 6 06:56:22 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bftmm/what_do_you_do_to_reup_your_motivation/
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[removed]
[Rant/Rave] Binged a week in a row.
/u/bitsybones [5'2 | 140 | 25.6 | 137 | F]
Created: Sun Nov 6 06:20:18 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bfoch/binged_a_week_in_a_row/
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Hey guys. On mobile, so I can't flair.
I went three weeks without bingeing. It was great and I've never felt more in control. I've lost 140 pounds over the past two years, but have gained back 20 just before hitting my goal weight. During the time I wasn't bingeing, I managed to lost 8 of the 20 pounds, but then all of a sudden my life decided to fall apart and I binged nonstop for a week, ruining all my progress I've made and now I'm up MORE than 20 pounds from my lowest.
My round face is starting to fill out again and I don't dare take my measurements. I feel sick and disgusted. I managed to lose all that weight without a problem and without bingeing, so why can't I do it now? Why can't I just hold out until I reach my goal weight and maintain? I hate this. I'm so tired of this.
[Discussion] The Scale
/u/eatdrinksmokegreen [5'4" | 133 lbs | 23.2 | -37 lbs | F]
Created: Sun Nov 6 06:19:28 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bfo8i/the_scale/
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Okay. . . So how often do you guys weigh yourselves? After my last attempt at ED recovery in 2012 I got rid of my scale. . . It was helpful because I wasn't obsessively weighing myself anymore but in the 3 years that scale was gone I put on a massive amount of weight and developed an intense fear of it. Since slipping into my disordered eating patterns again over the past year I've been losing and was finally able to start weighing myself a few months ago. At first I limited myself to once a month but now I've been doing it weekly. Stalled progress or (god forbid) gains make me super depressed so stepping on that scale is always a huge struggle. So. . . What kind of weigh-in/scale routines/rituals do you guys practice?
On a side note, down 2 pounds this week. I want to be happy about the loss but 2 pounds in a week is basically NOTHING so I've got to work a lot harder this week. . .
[Rant/Rave] Didn't believe i had an ED
/u/bloodketosexmagic
Created: Sun Nov 6 05:37:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bfix1/didnt_believe_i_had_an_ed/
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Anyone who's connected with me on peach has probably seen the shit storm I've been in this week, but i just wanted to post here.
My alcoholic mother has destroyed my family. She quit her job, never attends her outpatient sessions. shows very little willingness to change.
It gets really really bad around christmas, like police get involved bad. I just don't want that for the fourth year in a row.
I developed my ED becuase of the fear and distress she instilled into me every time i entered my own home. Until now she was the only one who i refused to tell.
I had enough and opened up to her on Thursday. Told her id been going to the same outpatient clinic as her since June. That i was the reason cereal was banned in the house for nearly a year. That i almost understood her addiction because i had the same one with food. I needed her to understand she wasn't the only one suffering, and that her choices had consequences much more serious than people being upset. She had made her daughter very sick and she had to fix it alone herself.
She was drunk less than 48 hours later.
I was very hurt by this and saw the whole thing as a sign i wasn't important to her anymore. I know alcohol addiction makes you do inconsiderate things but could she not even go a week? My daddy, God bless him, is heartbroken by everything. And he tried his best last night to comfort me and ask me not to take all of this so personally, which i just couldn't help. But reassured him i wouldn't.
Not its Sunday morning. My dad has a talk with my mum. He comes to me and says that she didnt believe me when i told her all about my ED.
She didnt believe me.
I have been going through such torment and pain for so long and my own mother didn't acknowledge it.
I reacted quite badly as you would imagine. I haven't said two words out loud since he said to me a while ago and there is a pit in my stomach right now.
Never felt more invalid in my entire life.
Edit: maybe some context should be given. Im 22 years old, 5'3 and 145lbs. Not underweight, so obviously can't have an eating disorder.
[Sticky] (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧ It's Sunday! Post all the memes November 06, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Sun Nov 6 05:09:02 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bffss/ﾉヮﾉﾟ_its_sunday_post_all_the_memes_november_06/
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This is the weekly 'Shitpost' Sunday thread for November 06, 2016.
This is the perfect place for all of your memes and humor posts!
*****
Have any questions or concerns? Comment below, or [PM the mods.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FproED)
[Sticky] Daily Food Diary! November 06, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Sun Nov 6 05:08:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bffs9/daily_food_diary_november_06_2016/
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This is a daily food diary thread for November 06, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
[Rant/Rave] Just got a care package
/u/thebroco
Created: Sun Nov 6 02:04:05 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5beypv/just_got_a_care_package/
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I just got a care package from a friend, and it was full of junk food :/ Now I have chocolate bars and chips just sitting around in my dorm room and it's honestly driving me crazy, I don't know what to do with it! It's all expensive vegan treats, it was such a nice gift and I can't just throw it all away but I've been doing so good with not binging lately (2 weeks!!) and I just feel like having all this junk food around is making me super anxious. Ugh, I don't know what to do.
[Other] [other] I think I'm ready to live.
/u/099103501 [166cm | cw 111lbs| bmi 18.3]
Created: Sun Nov 6 01:46:00 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bex6p/other_i_think_im_ready_to_live/
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I don't want to disappear anymore. Tonight my boyfriend asked me to please please not lose anymore weight. This is the first time that anyone has said something that's really connected, and I think it was the way he said it. It was heartbreaking and even if I don't want to get better for myself, I want to be better for him. I think that I can use that to help myself learn to eat enough again. I'm so scared but I love him, I can't slowly kill myself any longer. I need to fight and rid myself of this hell. I'm saying goodbye to sharp bones and perpetual cold, to the straw-like hair and the weakness. I hate the disorder thats ruled my life for so long.
[Help] snapping yourself out of a craving?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Nov 6 01:11:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5beok9/snapping_yourself_out_of_a_craving/
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[deleted]
[Discussion] Has anyone here ever been in hospital for your disorder? I want to hear your story.
/u/zoeglowey [5'2" | 104 | BMI 19 | - 23 | Female]
Created: Sun Nov 6 01:03:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bentm/has_anyone_here_ever_been_in_hospital_for_your/
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I'm curious what it's like to have to go through inpatient treatment for an eating disorder. I just want to know the reality of it.
I've struggled with this disorder for a long time and have never been underweight enough to require inpatient treatment.
I want to hear your experience and how you felt about it, and if it changed anything for you.
chat partner?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Nov 6 01:01:02 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5benj5/chat_partner/
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[removed]
[Discussion] Things people say about you?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Nov 5 23:42:07 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5befak/things_people_say_about_you/
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[deleted]
[Discussion] Caffeine intake
/u/avalonrose14
Created: Sat Nov 5 23:26:52 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bedit/caffeine_intake/
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This is my first post on here and I'm on mobile so I apologize in advance for no flair and any other mistakes.
I was curious about how much caffeine all of you have each day and any side effects you get from it. I don't like tea or coffee and I've kind of become an energy drink addict (I love the 0 cal fruit punch rockstars).
I've noticed I always each a lot less on days I have caffeine and I've been dabbling with caffeine amounts that'll help me lose weight the best without terrible side effects. I know it suppresses appetite and boosts your metabolism both of which are super helpful.
"How much are you looking to lose?"
/u/dec4y [5'3|cw:139.8|gw:95|-25lbs|F]
Created: Sat Nov 5 22:44:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5be89z/how_much_are_you_looking_to_lose/
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I'm hanging out with my boyfriend and his friend, and while we were at a pizza place I was complaining about the smell. My boyfriends friend asked why I didn't get pizza and my boyfriend told him I'm trying to diet. They were talking about it like I wasn't there so I just sat quietly until the friend looked at me and asked how much I wanted to lose. I hesitated because saying 50 pounds (at least) would look weird to them as they think I look fine so he just said "until you're happy with yourself?" When I agreed he went back to talking to my boyfriend and making jokes about how that never works because nobody is ever really happy with their body.
I can't really stop thinking about that. It's just really really true. Like..... I do want to lose weight until I'm happy with myself, and so far 95 pounds just seems like a good starting point. I am scared that I'll never really be happy with myself though... I dunno. Sorry for the pointless post.
[cant flair on mobile sorry]
[Intro] Thank fuck I found you guys
/u/iwanttoblowaway [5'9 | 126.1 | 18.29 | 21 M]
Created: Sat Nov 5 21:56:41 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5be1su/thank_fuck_i_found_you_guys/
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New poster here! Hi everybody!!! I can't tell anybody in my life any of this so I'm gonna tell you all.
22 years old and I feel like the most fucked up person in the world most of the time but I'm horrified of gaining weight so I'm not going to change a thing. The *dad bod* would never fit me. On the plus side, my fear of gaining weight is probably the only thing keeping me from getting hammered every day. I love drinking but I try to only drink on Friday nights because I always feel so guilty about how many carbs and calories I'm taking in. I can balance it out though because I usually just don't eat anything at all the day after I drink. I eat like 2 fairly small meals each day and my weight is staying the same, so I feel like if I ate any more than that, I'd gain. On top of that, I run 3-4 miles each day, 4-5 days each week.
I was 141 in March and I looked absolutely disgusting so I stopped eating chips and shit like that at night, then I stopped drinking regular soda, then I stopped eating outside of meals, then I started eating less at meals and stopped eating more than an apple or 80 calorie greek yogurt for breakfast. Diet coke and diet dr. pepper are my best friends. I know, I'll probably get cancer or something from it some day but it keeps me from getting hungry
I don't have a goal weight, or even plans to lose more weight, but the scale's been stuck at 128 for like 3 weeks now and I just want it to go down again but all I want right now is a goddamn donut. Or 6. I haven't had anything sweet in a week. I put on so much weight in the past couple weeks but it's finally gone. I went on vacation with my family and had to eat when I was with them, then I ate so much halloween candy last week I hated myself. I don't eat candy but I did on halloween. Probably like 10 halloween-sized chocolate stuff. I was like 138 and felt so gross and bloated. Deep down I knew it was mostly water weight but it still sucked. But it's finally gone. It's so fucked up though. I had a salad with chicken (literally lettuce, a grilled slim-cut skinless chicken breast fillet, and lime juice) for dinner and I feel like I just ate way too much. That was my first meal today.
One of my really close friends seems a little concerned with my eating habits (or lack thereof) but she only brought it up once when I didn't order anything when I had to go to dinner with friends. She doesn't matter though - so many people have told me I look so good lately that it's all that matters. And I do. I look damn good right now, but i feel like I'd look better if I was 125. Or 122. Or 120. I don't know. Eating out makes me hate myself but I feel like I have to once in a while to keep my friends happy so they'll keep inviting me to stuff. My life is so much fun right now. I go to the bar with all my friends at least once a week, or the casino. I'd love to go the bar every night but I'd be huge. So anyways, I feel like I have to appease them and eat out sometimes when they invite me so the fun won't end. Usually I can get out of it saying I have other dinner plans/leftovers/whatever but sometimes I go because who tf has dinner plans all the time that none of their best friends are involved in right? Sometimes I have to go throw it up in the parking lot if its an exceptionally greasy disgusting meal (tex-mex, I'm looking right at you)
The biggest downside is that sometimes I wish I could *not* think about food and calories and weight 24/7 but I've learned to live with it. Actually, I wish that all the time. I hate that I know the nutritional content of most foods the average person would come across on a daily basis. I hate that I can't eat a cookie and if I do, I won't eat anything else for the rest of the day, and I'll probably go for a second run. I hate that I don't eat muffins, candy, milk, french fries, and cake. If I could remember school stuff as easily as I do nutritional stuff, I'd be hands down the best student in my entire university.
The other night, I had a dream that I stepped on the scale and weighed 112 and I felt weightless. I could run for hours and hours without getting tired.
Anyways, that's me in a nutshell. A long ass nutshell, sorry.
[Discussion] Dorm rooms & related anxieties
/u/smallpaint [6'2" | 170lb | M]
Created: Sat Nov 5 21:44:33 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5be003/dorm_rooms_related_anxieties/
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(I'm just going to assume I get into my target university, because I can't deal with that separate worry right now)
Disordered eating makes my life a mess-- shocker--and I'm worried about how that'll affect me living in college residence. The best case scenario would be a bleakly painted apartment stocked with water and Quaker Oats, but the world is not a wish granting factory and I'm not independently wealthy.
So, realistically, I'm wondering how to keep it together while I'm there. The university I mentioned makes the choice SINGLE ROOM or SHARING A ROOM. There's no halfway space that I could finagle for a slightly larger bite taken from financial aid, and I'm just not stoked about cohabiting with other guys for, at minimum, a year? It causes me so much stress, even though they're going to be slightly smarter than the ones at my The Confederate South Is Ascendant rural high school.
How do I not lose my mind, next autumn when it all comes together? How do I not use this as an opportunity to retreat into myself and my disorder? How do I deal with the cultures of binge drinking, eating, and bulking?
Advice appreciated!
(\^not disparaging people with BED I mean it in the American "2kcal meals are normal" sense. Also, it sounds prettier with alliteration)
[Rant/Rave] LOVE U ALL
/u/throwaway03199519 [5'5 3/4 | CW: 113.6 | GW: lmfao | HW: 136]
Created: Sat Nov 5 21:33:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bdyjv/love_u_all/
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So drunk and really love u all. Ur all beautiful and great. Thank.
[Rant/Rave] I'll do anything to lose weight!......except stop eating.
/u/niahviv [5'5" | 131 | 21.80 | -14 |]
Created: Sat Nov 5 20:50:25 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bdrzs/ill_do_anything_to_lose_weightexcept_stop_eating/
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Just a little rant, don't know where else to turn.
I'm so sick and tired of being lazy and eating so goddamn much. I've been "stuck" at 133 pounds for OVER a fucking month. I'm so desperate to reach my goal weight, but apparently not enough to put the fucking fork down and go exercise. Fuck bulimia, seriously.
[Help] How do you forgive yourself and get back on track with your day?
/u/TopCat1392 [5'3.5" | FAT | ??? | -16.2 | GW:92.6 | F]
Created: Sat Nov 5 20:15:04 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bdmkf/how_do_you_forgive_yourself_and_get_back_on_track/
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Really, how? I'll restrict well for weeks, months even and then I'll screw up and eat something absolutely calorific and hate myself. And instead of logging my mistake and moving on with my day I instead decide my day is ruined. IF I'm lucky, I reset the next day. But this time, I decided that not only the day, week, and month were ruined (as if that weren't bad enough), NO this time I decided the rest of 2016 is ruined and have been out of control binging for over a month. HELP ME PLEASE 😭😢😱
[Help] How to end the b/p cycle?
/u/lovelybones98 [5'2 | 115 | 21 | 6lbs | F ]
Created: Sat Nov 5 19:25:31 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bdegr/how_to_end_the_bp_cycle/
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I used to never binge and now I can't stop and I purge after. My weight is going up and I just can't stop. I want to get back to restricting because it's what really works for me to lose weight. But I just can't get out of this cycle someone help please.
I need some meanspo as fuel
/u/sprinkle1997 [5'2 | CW 129 GW 100 | -25 lbs | 19F]
Created: Sat Nov 5 19:20:23 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bddl0/i_need_some_meanspo_as_fuel/
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[removed]
The first time I've felt genuinely panicked after eating too much...?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Nov 5 18:57:39 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bd9so/the_first_time_ive_felt_genuinely_panicked_after/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] My little victory for the day
/u/thorngren92 [5'7" | CW 152.6 | 23.8 | -21 | F]
Created: Sat Nov 5 18:53:34 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bd95s/my_little_victory_for_the_day/
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So lately I have been slowly but steadily losing weight, but seeing my parents always messes me up as we are a big eating family. My parents came to visit me today to hike and go out for mexican food (my weakness). I had a smallish breakfast of 215 calories to get me through the morning.
We hiked 2.5 miles before lunch. I ordered a vegetarian taco salad which consisted of: sautéed zucchini, squash, red and green bell pepper, refried beans, lettuce, tomatoes, and shredded cheese (I didn't eat the fried salad shell). I did munch on chips, salsa, and guacamole until our food came put because I was soooo hungry after the first hike.
After lunch we hiked another 2 miles and they my parents went home. So 4.5 miles of hiking total. I just entered all of lunch into MFP and came up with a total 1,126 calories which obviously is a lot, but with the small breakfast, no need for dinner, and all the hiking I still came out with a ~800 calorie deficit today.
*I'm on mobile and can't flair.
[Rant/Rave] Haha, my ED is starting to spiral out of control 👌
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Nov 5 18:04:01 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bd0vl/haha_my_ed_is_starting_to_spiral_out_of_control/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] fuck college dorms
/u/yikes_dot_com [5'6 | 111 | 17.9 | F]
Created: Sat Nov 5 17:45:49 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bcxt4/fuck_college_dorms/
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I had two pints of halo top left that I bought the other day and stored in the freezer in the kitchen in my dorm--budgeted one pint of chocolate into my calorie goal for today, got to the kitchen to find out someone had stolen it. Wtf. I had it in a plastic bag with my initials and the date as per protocol. They left the other pint (birthday cake) but I was really craving chocolate... :( fuck this, I can't wait to get out of here
edit: forgot to mention it's really expensive where I live, those babies cost $6 a pop. I'm so fucking angry
[Tip] [Tip] for Americans that have a Dollar Tree nearby..
/u/Nipple_tugboat
Created: Sat Nov 5 17:42:32 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bcx8q/tip_for_americans_that_have_a_dollar_tree_nearby/
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30 "Energy" Tablets (80mg of caffeine each), **ONE DOLLAR**.
I did the math, normally I buy these at CVS, and it's 11.50 for 80 capsules of 200mg. This would be 1,391.3mg per dollar. (At Dollar Tree, it would be 2,400mg per dollar)
=======================
30 "Green Tea Slim" Tablets (40mg Chromium, 100mg Green Tea Leaf Extract, 25mg Yerba Mate Leaf Extract, 25mg Apple Cider Vinegar Powder), **ONE DOLLAR**.
(This one may be worth less than your other Green Tea Extract, depending on what you get and what other ingredients are in it)
=======================
Just something I thought might help some people!
Unfortunately they also stock Pixie Stix for a dollar, one of my many weaknesses...
My dinner is supplements. I agreed. Fuck me.
/u/iamedgarstiles
Created: Sat Nov 5 17:39:17 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bcwp7/my_dinner_is_supplements_i_agreed_fuck_me/
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How do I add flair? On mobile, Reddit app.
[Rant/Rave] DAE eat even if they're not hungry!?!?
/u/tuftpuppy [5"4 | ??? | F]
Created: Sat Nov 5 16:48:01 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bcnoz/dae_eat_even_if_theyre_not_hungry/
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I'm starting to become mad at myself because for the past 2 weeks or so I've been BARELY hungry, even when my stomach was growling I didn't feel ravenous... but I ate anyway.
I always plan my daily intake the night before/the morning of the day and I get anxious if I don't eat everything I plan. I end up eating my planned 800-900kcals/day when I honestly could be eating like 500kcal max and feel fine. I guess it stresses me out because of the fear of muscle-loss (I have heart problems and muscle disease) but I could be losing more weight!! Ugh
Anyone else have this problem??
[Rant/Rave] Anyone around that I can rant to?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Nov 5 16:35:26 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bclip/anyone_around_that_i_can_rant_to/
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[deleted]
[Discussion] Opinions on the app My Fitness Pal?
/u/Frinada [5'4 | 154 | 26.4 | 0lbs | Girl]
Created: Sat Nov 5 16:32:15 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bckzn/opinions_on_the_app_my_fitness_pal/
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I just started using it and I love it however it's very hard to find any "friends" who understand having an ED. Also is there a way to stop the warning after completing an entry :(
Also does anyone have an account and want to be friends?
[Thinspo] small Audrey thinspo album (retro)
/u/three_two_bone [5'3" | hw: 139 | cw: 114 | gw: 95 | 19F]
Created: Sat Nov 5 15:12:12 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bc6ny/small_audrey_thinspo_album_retro/
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[here](http://imgur.com/a/8zRKN)
Audrey Hepburn is one of my ultimate fave thinspo celebs. she's not incredibly tiny but she is SO graceful. thought I'd share some faves w y'all :)
[Help] Beginning to have *real* bulimia and alcoholism. Wonderful. TW lots of food talk inside
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Nov 5 14:49:36 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bc2ju/beginning_to_have_real_bulimia_and_alcoholism/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] just b/p'd for the first time
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Nov 5 14:17:23 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bbwpl/just_bpd_for_the_first_time/
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I feel so fucking guilty and ashamed of myself. In middle through high school I never actually managed to purge, but I guess I've become more worldly with age. I honestly don't know why I did it...I wasn't really even hungry, it was like I was on autopilot and I was just doing it because I could. I've had a really great week, always way under my goal and with no real cravings, but here I am anyway. Why???
I don't think I actually got it all out, but I started seeing red flecks so called it quits. I think I at least got enough out that I was left with a normal sized meal. I don't know what I hoped to get from posting this, I just don't have anywhere/anyone else I could go to. I feel like such a piece of shit.
[Rant/Rave] Quarter jar of peanut butter
/u/kafka__dreams
Created: Sat Nov 5 13:27:18 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bbnfh/quarter_jar_of_peanut_butter/
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I weighed a lower weight than ive weighed in months. 116.8. But I have to work and I didnt eat yesterday. So for some reason I chose to eat like 1000 calories of peanut butter. At least I'm not dizzy anymore.
[Goal] Anyone want to join me in a binge free week? Day 6
/u/goodvibeswanted2
Created: Sat Nov 5 13:20:27 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bbm60/anyone_want_to_join_me_in_a_binge_free_week_day_6/
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Let's do this! Another day, another day we don't binge eat!
[Rant/Rave] I'm so discouraged right now guys and gals, but I have to get back into the groove. [Long]
/u/TiredOfBeingFat_ [6'0"| CW251 |BMI34 | 22lost | GW130]
Created: Sat Nov 5 13:03:38 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bbiyb/im_so_discouraged_right_now_guys_and_gals_but_i/
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So I have lumbar scoliosis and spondilolothesis(a couple of my back plates slide and grind up against one another) So I went to the doctor last Friday and I was up one pound to 243, then last Saturday I began my first period since I had my Skyla iud put in about a month ago. I had been on a plateau for the past couple of weeks even with restricting so I figured I'd just quit counting and gain a few pounds and maybe it would be able to kick start my losing again when I put effort into it.
Well I've been binging for the past week, and with some of the pain pills I've been taking I've been kind of constipated when usually I'm shitting my guts out. Well I went to weigh myself this morning after trying to go to the bathroom and the scale said 247. So I freaked out and binged a little. 5 pieces pizza and an egg, bacon, and cheese biscuit from McDonald's. (not really a huge quanity binge, but a high calorie one at that)
I can't figure out if I've really gained four pounds in the past week or if it's just period bloat+constipation. I'm going to try to get back into my routine of restricting to 800 calories and exercising at least an hour a day. But I've been pretty depressed as well due to medicine issues and I binge when I'm depressed. Going to the doctor this Wednesday to see what can be done.
At this point I feel like I'm just doomed to always be this obese whale of a girl who is always stuffing her face... :( I was honestly getting kind of happy with the way I was starting to look too and I only had 42 pounds left till my first goal weight of 200. And I went from 270 to 242 in like three months. But now I'm just setting myself back.
And honestly even when I was still binging early in the beginning, I was purging and losing a fuck ton of weight, but my boyfriend lives with me and he kept freaking out about my purging so I slowly quit And have been clean for about a month now. But I've been so tempted to do it so many times since then. And he supports me in wanting to lose weight, but hates the way I had been doing it. So I'm trying to do it a little bit of a healthier way. Because I'm not trying to be thin really, I just want to not be obese anymore and I want to beat my binge eating once and for all.
So here's to trying to kick my depressed butt into gear starting today and getting back on track. Thanks for always letting me get this weight off my shoulders(literally lmao) ProED. You are the only place I can vent without feeling subjected to shame. ❤
[Goal] My waist is at its smallest measurement since forever
/u/scyphomedusae [5'6" | 114 lbs | 18.48 | -30 | F]
Created: Sat Nov 5 12:23:22 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bbbjk/my_waist_is_at_its_smallest_measurement_since/
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Helloooo
Just wanted to share this with you all cause I'm very happy :-))))
I measured my waist and I'm at 26 inches, my lowest - which might not sound that much but to me is very good, since I was a competitive swimmer throughout my entire childhood/early teens and so my waistline has always been a bit "erased".
I'm starting to finally, objectively seeing that I'm thinner - just waiting to see that in the mirror haha
thanks to you all for the support and the lovely community, probably would have had a lot harder of a time without this!
[Discussion] Instagram acc names!
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Nov 5 11:51:12 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bb593/instagram_acc_names/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] i'm going to residential soon and i'm not ready.
/u/moggettt [5'5 | 105.2 | 17.5 | NB]
Created: Sat Nov 5 11:46:18 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bb4d4/im_going_to_residential_soon_and_im_not_ready/
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there's no way i'm going to be able to weasel my way out of it, there are too many people watching me now. all i can really hope for is that insurance will hold it up for a while longer or something.
at this rate i'll be in residential over thanksgiving (which is an excuse to not go back to my hometown, but still). god i'm really not ready to go. i'm so close to my goal.
this womps. completely. people keep telling me my behavior's gotten out of control but i just need a little more time.
[Discussion] I know I'm not the only one in a loveless marriage.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Nov 5 11:20:48 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bazkk/i_know_im_not_the_only_one_in_a_loveless_marriage/
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[deleted]
So Lucky to have this man as my BF. So motivating in any situation.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Nov 5 11:07:37 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bax64/so_lucky_to_have_this_man_as_my_bf_so_motivating/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/4b7910a657dc474aab38903bf7600b7f?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=40ff0ba3f16d8c9ea94685f52d0e210b
[Goal] Goal: I have a ways to go but these jeans haven't fit me in a long time! Feeling pretty good!!
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Nov 5 10:52:38 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5bauaj/goal_i_have_a_ways_to_go_but_these_jeans_havent/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/48b15e484b4c41be89777ccaaab2faf9?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=c34d1b4ff7579768f54f31524f9af022
[Rant/Rave] Had such a crap day and now obsessing about food
/u/WorstCunt [donkey brain]
Created: Sat Nov 5 10:22:17 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5baoqd/had_such_a_crap_day_and_now_obsessing_about_food/
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I'm fasting atm but I've had such an emotionally jarring day that all I can think of is food. I want to binge and purge so badly but I know I will be completely overcome with shame and guilt afterwards. So much so that it would probably throw me into a b+p cycle and undo all my hard work.
I probably won't binge (I hope...) but it's still disturbing feeling so tormented by these thoughts. I wish they would just go away. I wish I could stop letting my emotions have such a strong hold over me. I can't control what other people do but I want to be able to control how I react and I feel like it's impossible sometimes.
[Rant/Rave] I planned to fast all week in preparation for my LDR boyfriend visiting this weekend....
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Nov 5 09:01:13 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5baa61/i_planned_to_fast_all_week_in_preparation_for_my/
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But oops, I binged every night this week too :'D
And now I feel like my life is out of control :'D
But he is traveling all the way here and we have all these plans and it's so exciting :'D
So I have to suppress my complete panic and disgust and live the life of a normal person :'D
And channel every shred of 'sexy' I feel within me to not ruin this visit :'D
He is leaving tomorrow morning (yes, it is a very brief visit, he just happened to have a ride both days so he's a rockstar for coming).
I will fix this starting tomorrow.
I will just enjoy today and tonight with him and put "ED" on the back burner for the sake of living.
:'D :'D
[Help] Almost every food is a fear food
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Nov 5 08:35:24 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5ba62a/almost_every_food_is_a_fear_food/
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[deleted]
[Discussion] Anyone ever binged on nuts?
/u/smokesanddietcokes [Everybody's Fool]
Created: Sat Nov 5 07:10:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b9tq1/anyone_ever_binged_on_nuts/
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I generally keep my diet low-fat, but recently I've been having mini-binges on nuts! Only specifically recently (and I do want to specify only mini-binges, like 500-700kcal).. it's gotten colder here, I'm not sure if that's it? Do we tend to want more fats in our diet in colder weather? I know the cold can do funny things to appetite/cravings..
I'm trying to find a reason why I might be doing this, when high fat foods were pretty easy for me to resist even when I keep a low fat diet consistently. It COULD just be because I labelled last week as maintenance week and went a bit crazy on the nuts as it was (because I really just like the taste of them!) so my mini-binge today was just the remnants of that 'more free' mindset and will change after the turn of the new week (I seem to operate like that sometimes..) ... or it could be something else. I'm not going at them every day or anything, it just pops up once in a while and I need to get me some nuts!
While I'm working this out, anyone else have tales of going absolutely ridiculous on the nuts, to make me feel better about doing it and less like a nut obsessed nutcase? Like I have a whole cupboard of chocolate and junk to binge on.. but nope, I'm grabbing two/three snack packs of nuts. Cus I just NEED NUTS.
[Sticky] 'Stupid Questions' Saturday! November 05, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Sat Nov 5 06:07:43 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b9lx0/stupid_questions_saturday_november_05_2016/
---
This is the weekly 'Stupid Questions' Saturday thread for November 05, 2016.
Use this thread as an opportunity to ask any questions you might have that you feel don't necessarily warrant their own post.
Please be wary of false advice and information. Be sure to research the facts before taking anyone's advice, no matter who they are. Remember that diagnosing members is unacceptable. **Anyone looking for medical guidance should seek the opinion of a medically licensed professional.**
*****
Have any questions or concerns? Comment below, or [PM the mods.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FproED)
[Sticky] Daily Food Diary! November 05, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Sat Nov 5 06:07:35 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b9lwl/daily_food_diary_november_05_2016/
---
This is a daily food diary thread for November 05, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
[Discussion] Politeness
/u/inokenta13 [5'8.5" | CW 131.8 | BMI 20.0 | GW 115 | 25F]
Created: Sat Nov 5 03:37:43 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b972i/politeness/
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Hi all, I'm new to the community and hoping for some feedback (no pun intended). I'm meeting a friend tomorrow who I haven't hung out with much and she offered to bring me coffee. I tried to do the low maintenance thing where I was like, "Anything's fine! I love coffee!" instead of being like "It has to be skinny!!!" but now I'm sort of panicking at the thought of unrestrained calories. She decided to bring me a white chocolate peppermint mocha (which actually sounds really good) and I can assume it will be made with 2% because that's standard at most coffee shops, so I can make an educated guess about the caloric content but it still freaks me out. I want to be able to accept spontaneity and generosity without a bunch of caveats, but my anxiety gets in the way.
DAE experience this?
[Discussion] DAE use the app Argus?
/u/thecalcographer [5'4 | CW: 105 | GW: 99 | 18.0 | F]
Created: Sat Nov 5 02:25:21 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b90o2/dae_use_the_app_argus/
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And if you do, do you find that it underestimates the number of calories you burn every day? All of the other calculators I've used estimate I need anywhere between 1400 to 1800 a day, but Argus seems to think I only burn 1200? That shouldn't even cover my BMR. It makes me worried that I'm not burning nearly as many calories as I thought.
[Intro] Finally joined...
/u/xxx07v [5'6" | cw: 96lbs | bmi: 15.69 | - 24lbs| F]
Created: Sat Nov 5 00:21:06 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b8ojv/finally_joined/
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So I finally decided to join after lurking for the past few months...cause I guess things have become harder and I guess I want some sort of support...Anyway, this subreddit has been one of my few comforts to get me through hard times with my "ed". I don't know if I do have an ed but I know that I identify with so many of the things said here that finding this subreddit was such a relief, like finally!! someone who feels the same as I do inside, the stress of eating and all the other forms of stress (social, school, mental...) that comes with it...I'm just really thankful for this sub:)
I guess restricting was still manageable during my summer break but once Uni life started again, I've just felt like such a mess, ready to break down any moment. The things that direct me now are my assignments and food, if I have to eat, its because I need the energy and the brain juice to do my projects which require ideas. I'm an art student so a lot of my projects rely on ideas and when I'm deprived of the mental capacity to even think (due to low food intake), I end up being more stressed up as I decided between food and school work. It's also been a bit hard as of late as people are starting to notice I've lost weight (though I just can't see it myself) and keep encouraging me to eat. When they do offer me food, I just see it as some sort of conspiracy to fatten me up and I just feel even worse inside cause these same people are my family and friends who I know do it out of concern. However, my relationship with food has just screwed up my way of thinking to such a degree that I end up doubting all my friends and family when it comes to eating. [DAE feel that way?:(] I just wish I could stop thinking about calories and food and my thighs and ughhh and spent more time on school so I can create better works but I know that so far, I've only been happy if I lose weight. In the past, I was always concerned with my weight but didn't put that much thought into it, I guess I was still "normal" back then. A few months back, some stuff happened and I entered this really dark phase and somehow restricting and counting calories gave me a strange feeling of being in control. This made me feel like I was slowly getting my life back together especially when restricting actually resulted in weight loss (action=result). With that mindset in mind, I just became even more focused at it and now it feels like a permanent thing which is starting to slowly ruin other things in life. Like I'm aware of how its taking a toll on school and my social life but I just refuse to let it go cause letting loose becomes another form of stress to me. Okay, I apologise for all the "and"s and bad writing but I just really don't know how to put it together. Now, I'm just feeling really stressed out cause I was 97lbs last week and now I'm stuck at 99lbs. I know I'm at quite a low stage but this feeling of suddenly gaining just makes me feel like I haven been doing things right, like I'm losing control. Maybe its my period and water weight but I haven been bleeding in edges, only feeling cramps so I can't confirmed. I wish all that is just water weight but I don't know and that scares me. Moreover, all my final projects are due soon and this feeling isn't helping. Sigh. sorry my intro became a rant but I guess I needed an avenue to channel it somewhere...
[Discussion] DAE have stores that trigger them?
/u/thecalcographer [5'4 | CW: 105 | GW: 99 | 18.0 | F]
Created: Fri Nov 4 23:39:25 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b8jps/dae_have_stores_that_trigger_them/
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For me, I can't shop at H&M anymore. Their inconsistent sizing plus the weird fun house mirrors and fluorescent lighting is always a trigger for me.
Am I the only one or do you experience this too?
[Discussion] Control in other parts of your life = control over your eating?
/u/caithaa [5'7 | 121 | 18.94 | 19F 🌼]
Created: Fri Nov 4 23:39:11 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b8joo/control_in_other_parts_of_your_life_control_over/
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Hey everyone, recently I realized that I tend to binge a lot when my life is "messy".
Let's say all my clothes are freshly washed, folded and put away, I wouldn't binge. Instead, I'd be inspired to restrict.
Or let's say I just did a full self-care routine - cleansing my face, moisturizing etc. usually takes like an hour to do everything, I would never binge after that.
On the other hand, if I skip class or don't take my morning shower, I'm much more inclined to mess up my planned meals. Does anyone else realize this in their life?
I'm aware that eating disorders and control-related disorders (like OCD) are closely correlated, but does anyone else feel the need for consistent perfection or everything spirals out of control to hell & you have to step up twenty times harder to break it?
I've just had a horrible two weeks of binging and hating myself, and today I dragged myself to the gym, did laundry & took a bath, did my nails etc. Hoping this breaks the cycle back into consistency & stability!!
[Help] New Job... New Struggles...
/u/skinnylove73 [5'10 | 124 | 17.35 | -16 | F]
Created: Fri Nov 4 23:34:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b8j5q/new_job_new_struggles/
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Hi all,
I recently started working at a restaurant/bar and the urge to drink and eat is so much more than it has ever been! any tips or advice???
[Rant/Rave] I don't understand...
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Nov 4 23:15:27 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b8gvc/i_dont_understand/
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[removed]
[Other] First fast in forever
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Nov 4 21:48:25 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b8540/first_fast_in_forever/
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[deleted]
[Help] Breaking a binge? (support/advice please)
/u/kooraloo [5'2 | fat as fuck | F]
Created: Fri Nov 4 21:37:34 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b83mn/breaking_a_binge_supportadvice_please/
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My LDR bf came to visit all of last week and I decided to consciously try to eat like I used to so he wouldn't suspect. It quickly devolved into me eating in front of him... and sneaking out for a several calorie binge. He left Saturday. And I'm currently sitting in my car bawling and nauseous because I ate $40 in McDonalds. I hate McDonalds. And I hate myself. I just fucking spent $40 on hating myself. Each bite I felt disgusting and knew I needed to stop, but couldn't bring myself. I'm up 5 pounds. Five fucking pounds in two weeks.
How do I break this binge cycle?? I feel so out of control.
On those bad binge days
/u/BeautifulApples [5'2.5" | 101.6lbs | 18.87 | -25.6 lbs | F]
Created: Fri Nov 4 20:52:04 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b7wzl/on_those_bad_binge_days/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/bf4ea564c92745748f52835ae68f3970?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=b4f8ff8457fb4d8c4bdfe82bdd2d995d
[Rant/Rave] Purged for the first time in two months
/u/skinnyhero [5' 4" | CW: 164.9 | 31.5% BF | -27.1 | NB/F]
Created: Fri Nov 4 20:33:48 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b7u6j/purged_for_the_first_time_in_two_months/
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Sigh. I just purged a few hours ago after having not purged in a few months. I was quite proud of myself for it but I guess I just lost this time.
I sorta don't even want to tell my therapist about it. It felt so logical at the time. But now I feel kind of sick.
Does anyone else feel sick and in pain after a purge?
(On mobile app no flair)
[Rant/Rave] DAE sometimes wish they were still fat
/u/fehries [5'0|110.4lb|22.7|F]
Created: Fri Nov 4 20:19:16 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b7s0h/dae_sometimes_wish_they_were_still_fat/
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I relapsed and since May I've lost like 30lbs, but now my boobs are all saggy and gross and I have excess skin on my stomach. And my waist is so wide compared to my hips. I have like a square body when I wear clothes, and stupid violin hips. I hated myself more when I was fat, but at least back then I could say I had nice proportions and tits.
[Rant/Rave] Everything sucks. I want to die.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Nov 4 20:16:30 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b7rl8/everything_sucks_i_want_to_die/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] Best friend problems
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Nov 4 20:12:26 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b7qyf/best_friend_problems/
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[deleted]
[Help] I'm kinda freaked out. I told her I wanted the skinny vanilla latte and the recipt doesn't say skinny?? Help
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Nov 4 19:08:32 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b7guf/im_kinda_freaked_out_i_told_her_i_wanted_the/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/507e3760748e407482784107b97449aa?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=b24809b4fe8f6f2748e3adba56b89f6e
[Help] Mineral oil vs mag citrate
/u/TopCat1392 [5'3.5" | FAT | ??? | -16.2 | GW:92.6 | F]
Created: Fri Nov 4 18:54:12 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b7eif/mineral_oil_vs_mag_citrate/
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Which is more effective in getting as much out the quickest? Is one better than the other in terms of toll on my body/dependency?
Don't know whether to flair as help or doscussion?
[Rant/Rave] What is wrong with me!?!
/u/eatdrinksmokegreen [5'4" | 133 lbs | 23.2 | -37 lbs | F]
Created: Fri Nov 4 18:46:15 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b7d91/what_is_wrong_with_me/
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I just broke a 46 hour fast . . . With Taco Bell . . . Why do I do this kind of nonsense ? ? 3 tacos and almost 6 oz of soda . . . Purging isn't working either . . . So disappointed . . . So disappointing . . . It wasn't even hunger that caused it . . . Just straight up garbage food cravings :(:( I gave right in . . .
[Discussion] DAE struggle to sleep after restricting?
/u/diet247x [5'3 | CW: 139 | -16 lbs | GW: 90 lbs | F]
Created: Fri Nov 4 17:11:26 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b6wd1/dae_struggle_to_sleep_after_restricting/
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Whenever I restrict, I have a really hard time getting more than 5 hours of sleep at night. Does anyone else have this problem? I've tried taking 3g of melatonin, but I still wake up after 3 hours.
[Help] Has anyone ever tried XLS Max Strength?
/u/smokesanddietcokes [Everybody's Fool]
Created: Fri Nov 4 17:05:42 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b6vea/has_anyone_ever_tried_xls_max_strength/
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Apparently it blocks some digestive enzymes so you digest less sugar & other carbs, and fat, meaning these things just sit in your system until they pass through you. Fewer calories absorbed!
Apparently it also gives you diarrhoea and terrible wind. I can't say I care about these things, bring it on. I get messed up digestive issues all the time anyway. Actually, being able to poop and pass wind would be a RELIEF, hah!
The only thing putting me off is the cost, and being unsure what dosage I should take considering I am a small person. Suggested dose is 2 tablets before a meal, but considering I'm 5ft and nearing the low end of a normal BMI.. I'm wondering if I could get away with one to make the pack last longer. Either way, I could save up for some after Xmas..
I'm wondering if anyone here has tried it and what they think/thought?
[Rant/Rave] I just purged again...
/u/wavvvybaby
Created: Fri Nov 4 17:00:53 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b6ui0/i_just_purged_again/
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Ive been on the quest bar diet as of late. Three to four bars a day and maybe an apple.
But yesterday my family ordered pizza. So i had a slice. Then another. Then another. Then i purged.
Then today. Had my four bars. But i ate some granola from a cereal mix. So i just purged.
I just want to be skinny. I hate purging but I feel compelled to do it.
[Other] I know it's easier said than done, but I thought you all could use these beautiful words tonight. ♥️
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Nov 4 16:58:53 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b6u55/i_know_its_easier_said_than_done_but_i_thought/
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http://i.imgur.com/1GUMAv2.jpg
[Help] Help me come up with a goal weight?
/u/imnevergold [5'6 | 112 | 18.15 | -15 | F |]
Created: Fri Nov 4 16:43:37 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b6rbq/help_me_come_up_with_a_goal_weight/
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[removed]
[Rant/Rave] Feel disgusted
/u/rizzle_riz [5'4' | CW:138.8 | 24.5 | -20 | F]
Created: Fri Nov 4 16:32:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b6p9w/feel_disgusted/
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My roommates parents are visiting for the weekend. They brought a fuck ton of food with them and ~~practically forced~~ offered a plate. Now I've gone over my calories by a lot and to makes things worse they decided to top it all off by handing me the largest piece of pie ever(WTF). Now I'm panicking because none of this was supposed to happen and I'm so tempted to purge but I can't because they are in the room next door. I hate this so much. I feel disgusting and anxious because I can't do anything to fix this mistake of a meal.
[Discussion] Tell me some of your ED quirks and oddities.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Nov 4 16:08:14 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b6kkz/tell_me_some_of_your_ed_quirks_and_oddities/
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[removed]
[Help] My darlings!
/u/rainbowsunshinedust [5'5 | 101 | 17.00 | GW 95 | F]
Created: Fri Nov 4 16:04:52 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b6jxz/my_darlings/
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[removed]
What to expect from fasting?
/u/tenderwake
Created: Fri Nov 4 15:08:11 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b68o5/what_to_expect_from_fasting/
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[removed]
[Rant/Rave] [rant/rave] Reached my gw! ft. an introduction
/u/Thatza_Latza_Matza [5'3" | CW 120 | BMI: 21.4 | -20]
Created: Fri Nov 4 14:58:21 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b66lg/rantrave_reached_my_gw_ft_an_introduction/
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Hi all, I'm new. I mean, I'm not new. I've been lurking here for a very long time, but I've recently started participating in discussions. I figured I should introduce myself.
I've had disordered eating since I was 10 or 11. I grew up in a family of obese women who crash dieted and hated their bodies, so it came naturally to me. I used food as a method of control when I felt like I had none, but I went through recovery when I was 16 and my ed made itself more obvious. I still struggled with disordered eating, but my mom made sure I was eating properly. I totally ballooned, I went from my low of 92 to 140 in a year. I wasn't happy, but I guess that didn't really matter to my mom. I turned 18 this year, I moved out on my own for college and my former habits came back very quickly.
It's kind of gross how much I missed restricting, it was like all my senses were dulled when I was eating all the time. Now everything is sharp and clear again. I moved out in August, and in 4 months, I've dropped 20 pounds, I'm at 120 again. I still hate myself, but at least I don't feel the way I did before.
Whoo, sorry for the rambling wall of text, it just feels so great to tell someone about this! I'm super excited to be a part of you guys' community, since you're all such lovely people. Thanks for reading this
[Help] I feel like I'll always be hopeless
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Nov 4 14:45:30 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b63wy/i_feel_like_ill_always_be_hopeless/
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despite my attempts to restrict (although I'm well aware I could do MUCH better than I do, which is also another thing I'll probably end up posting about--gaining enough willpower. bleh) I work out pretty consistently and strenuously. How do I avoid gaining muscle rather than losing weight? when I do eat, Its rarely empty calories because I enjoy healthy foods. So shouldn't I be losing weight rather than gaining weight, through muscle? My calves are so defined, my legs/thighs have developed muscle that I didn't have before--so much that Im noticing stretch marks going down my actual leg/above the knees, not the inners of my thighs like a normal person (what the fuck)
My stomach looks like vague abs over fat, so how do I get rid of the damn fat before gaining muscle that I don't even want? what am I doing wrong? I just want to keep losing weight and I feel so hopeless.
(Sorry if I sound ignorant or triggering?? I'm still relatively new to reddit and hope this is going to be seen in the right place)
[Discussion] Not tempted in the slightest (possible tw for food discussion)
/u/Weazin_the_Ju-uice
Created: Fri Nov 4 14:32:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b617o/not_tempted_in_the_slightest_possible_tw_for_food/
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Possible trigger warning. I'm not sure if this will bother anyone, but below is a lot of talk about food and not wanting it.
I have been feeling alone about this since the influx of halloween candy posts. I don't mind those posts at all, but with so many of them it makes me feel really alone in my lack of temptation.
It's not like I don't have all this junk around me either. I cook 4-5 full "regular people" meals a day for different people. Every day. My kitchen is filled with snacks, carbs, desert, and every other food imaginable. I have 3 buckets of halloween candy in my house that I see and touch every day. I literally dig through the candy to choose my kids/SO's favorites to pack in their lunches.
I can barely make myself eat my preferred foods. I am post-"recovery" so maybe the forced feeding has made me feel even less desire for food. I am not being watched anymore so my intake has dropped of very steeply.
This morning I argued with myself for an hour because I felt like skipping breakfast, but in the end I skipped it anyway. Right now I am trying to lose weight, but my goal is to do that while making it to 800 calories per day. Most days I don't come anywhere close to that.
I don't understand it. I don't hate food at all. I really enjoy it. But I almost never feel tempted by food around me. The only thing that I crave occasionally is carbs, but I can satisfy that with a 80 cal piece of toast and 95 cal of peanut butter...instead of a whole pizza?
Does anyone else feel like it's not a huge temptation to be surrounded by piles of candy? Does anyone else fast and restrict around 100-500 regularly without binges? Or maybe with only very very few binges?
side note: I sincerely apologize to anyone who suffers with BED or anything else who may have been upset by this post.
[Goal] Help me come up with a gw?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Nov 4 14:04:29 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b5vam/help_me_come_up_with_a_gw/
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[removed]
[Help] Therapy help
/u/isurvivedthetruck
Created: Fri Nov 4 13:59:03 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b5u2f/therapy_help/
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Hello lovlies! I started therapy again last month and had two start up sessions and didn't mention my ed, because I'm not at a place where I am ready to recover. I think I want to get a little better, and I think having a safe place to talk about it and try to understand it better would be nice, but I am terrified she's going to send me to in-patient or something. I was wondering if she can force me to go or if it's something I can comfortably bring up. Thanks in advance!
[Discussion] Suggestions for a high fiber cereal?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Nov 4 13:23:27 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b5mfk/suggestions_for_a_high_fiber_cereal/
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[deleted]
[Help] In Ireland for a few weeks. Can any UK/Ireland users recommend things to buy at the grocery?
/u/lyxil [5' 0"| 93 lb | 19.13 | -47 | f]
Created: Fri Nov 4 13:16:36 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b5kvw/in_ireland_for_a_few_weeks_can_any_ukireland/
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Are there any low-calorie foods anyone can recommend for me here? I'm open to trying new things! Thank you <3
^Missing ^my ^Halo ^Top ^and ^Fiber ^One ^cereal ^:(
[Goal] Can't edit my flair right now but I got to a NEW LOW today!! :D
/u/zoeglowey [5'2" | 104 | BMI 19 | - 23 | Female]
Created: Fri Nov 4 13:15:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b5kqs/cant_edit_my_flair_right_now_but_i_got_to_a_new/
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Stepped on the scale after getting home (and I've actually been eating semi-normally this week), and WITH clothes, I was 104.0!! I was so excited and surprised. I'm happy to be losing weight without fasting :)
[Rant/Rave] I was reading my old journal and...
/u/kafka__dreams
Created: Fri Nov 4 13:12:15 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b5jyk/i_was_reading_my_old_journal_and/
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Last year on October 16th I was 120, on the 23rd I was 114.8, then on November 13th I was 112.4, then down to 110 on the 17th. Thats 10lbs in a month which doesn't sound like a big deal, but I cant lose like that anymore. It did inspire me though because I feel like if I did it before, I can do it again. Heres to trying for 115 by the 11th!
[Discussion] Does anyone else get Charlie horses/muscle spasms when restricting?
/u/iPood_ [5'0" | 101 | 19.7 | -50 | F]
Created: Fri Nov 4 12:24:12 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b59aw/does_anyone_else_get_charlie_horsesmuscle_spasms/
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I've been restricting pretty hardcore the past few weeks and noticed I keep getting a lot of Charlie horses in my feet and calves. I'm drinking 2-3L of water a day and pretty much always under 500 cals. Is this a coincidence or has anyone else had this? I'm not exactly concerned but they are kinda annoying.
[Goal] Bad news: I'm depressed again. Good news: That means I can lose some fucking weight
/u/Thunder2WonderThighs
Created: Fri Nov 4 11:27:25 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b4wtq/bad_news_im_depressed_again_good_news_that_means/
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It's just so much easier to fast and restrict when I hate myself.
God I hate this fucking S.A.D., it's like clockwork.
Was feeling good in this outfit, but I look a wee bit like a bobble head doll.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Nov 4 11:23:35 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b4w0f/was_feeling_good_in_this_outfit_but_i_look_a_wee/
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http://imgur.com/rVG4pni
[Rant/Rave] Triggered
/u/Alexa1p [5'5'' | 110 | 18 | -10.7 | F]
Created: Fri Nov 4 11:05:32 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b4s03/triggered/
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This quarter I've been trying my hardest to give my attention to school, not food or restricting. I've been ignoring the times I feel fat, because I convinced myself that getting good grades was more important than being a little chubby. A couple of days ago my boyfriend broke up with me, and I stopped eating for a couple of days. We ended up getting back together, and today I was determined to get back on track with school and ignoring my disordered eating tendencies.
UNTIL I GO TO PHYSICS CLASS. We were discussing energy, and my professor decides to make the class lecture about calories. He asks us how many calories we think are in a slice of chocolate cake (this extremely thin girl ventured 1000, which makes me suspect she might have an ed), talked about starvation mode (in a scientific way, not in the fat-logic sense), and all I could think about was calories and food and weight gain. I haven't eaten yet today and instead of doing homework, I'm browsing this sub, and looking at pictures of thin girls, and feeling tempted to eat even though I'm not hungry.
If I put as much time and obsession into math and physics as I do into counting calories and thinking about food/restricting, I swear I'd be a genius.
[Goal] Another year older, another year....definitely not wiser. And short term goal.
/u/aerienne [5'5" | 142.6 | F]
Created: Fri Nov 4 11:01:32 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b4r0j/another_year_older_another_yeardefinitely_not/
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It was my birthday yesterday. I'm old now. Practically dead. I mean, 24 is knocking on death's door.
I told no one about my birthday. Just fine. Managed to fast all day and then b/p on prosciutto. Side note, throwing up anything that salting is like throwing up sea water and it's so bad. Oh my Zeus, horrible. Technically though, I purged before my birthday hour. So it's fine.
Other than that, I've been good these 4 days of November thus far. Go me. And now I'm possibly going home for Christmas in 5 or 6 weeks. I need to be in the 130s by then. Holy shit. But I love working towards short-term goals.
A month and a half is 10 pounds easy, right? And I'll only be home for 8 days or so. Won't do too much damage since we don't do big dinners or anything.
Anyway, just wanted to check in. I don't know why. I have to go cook a beautiful dinner for my host family and their exchange student in about 20 minutes. Going to skip eating and say I'm going out later with friends to celebrate....something.
Good news: If I see my family during Christmas, I most likely won't see them again until summer and that's plenty of time. They won't freak over weight-loss during Christmas since I'll be covered up and not there long enough to trigger suspicion.
More good news: I have a doctor appointment on Monday to try to get Wellbutrin again! Wish me luck!
[Rant/Rave] Can my body just make up its damn mind??
/u/pcrnography [5'6" | -77 lbs | nb]
Created: Fri Nov 4 10:51:28 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b4oq1/can_my_body_just_make_up_its_damn_mind/
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Last night I had my first binge since September 22, I logged 2200 calories but I was guessing it was more likely 2500 calories. I couldn't sleep because all I could feel was how full I am, it was making me sick. I didn't purge (woot woot) but I stayed up until like 4 in the morning having an anxiety attack, I self harmed for the first time in a long time, in all I had a Very Bad Night.
Woke up this morning and after some debate I decided I was going to weigh myself (I am a glutton for punishment) and guess what?
I FUCKING LOST TWO POUNDS. ARE YOU KIDDING ME. I eat 700 calories a day and loose nothing but the second I eat 10000000 I lose weight immediately. I can't even be happy because I'm so annoyed.
Edit: I was even planning to fast and go on a much longer run than I usually would. Now I'm thinking I continue on with 700 calories as usually but like... What the fuck
[Rant/Rave] I finally got my scale back after months of binging with no will to change.
/u/dec4y [5'3|cw:139.8|gw:95|-25lbs|F]
Created: Fri Nov 4 10:49:31 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b4oct/i_finally_got_my_scale_back_after_months_of/
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Hi guys I'm back!!!
Long story short, my dad took my scale away right around the time I started school in august and I started eating a FUCK TON and was too ashamed to come back here... I had no motivation to eat better and with so much free junk food and stress around me I started binging pretty much daily. I hated what I was becoming and just in time for a BUCKETLOAD OF INSANE LEGAL STRESS my dad gave me my scale back. So here I am. Hopefully I'm going to start feeling a little better now.
As my flair says I left at 148lbs but I distinctly remember being at about 143 at one point... who knows. Point is, I stepped on the scale and I didn't gain as much as I thought!!! I went to the doctor last month and the scale said 153.3 (after I swore I'd never hit 150 again). Of course it was fully clothed after eating lunch but still. At this point in time I'm 145.6 somehow, so I can even move my flair down!!!
Honestly i feel way more relieved than is healthy for something like this... but gaining 3-4 pounds after literally months of binging at least 2 or 3 times a week is amazing to me.
Anyway yeah sorry for the long post haha.
Tl;dr: it's good to be back!
[Rant/Rave] [rant/rave] frustration
/u/sassafraskitten
Created: Fri Nov 4 10:45:33 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b4niu/rantrave_frustration/
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(I'll just add my stats here since I'm on mobile)
5'6", 132lbs
I binged last night and I was going to purge but my girlfriend figured that was what I was going to do. Soooo I didn't get to get rid of it. I took a few laxatives to compensate and my weight wasn't up this morning, so maybe I'm okay, but I'm fasting as long as I can get away with it.
[Discussion] Changed my goal. Again. [discussion]
/u/disbeetch [5'3'' | 140 | 23.7 | -34 | F]
Created: Fri Nov 4 10:38:17 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b4lyi/changed_my_goal_again_discussion/
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Does anyone else do this? My new goal isn't weight related for once (although who am I kidding, yes it is). I want to be thin enough to fit into those damn brandy melville jeans
[Rant/Rave] Personal rant
/u/ahh_idk [5'4'' | will update | F]
Created: Fri Nov 4 10:35:18 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b4lbz/personal_rant/
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I fucking hate my ED. I hate waking up every single day and only caring about the number on the scale. The rational part of my brain knows weight can fluctuate for a number of reasons. My ED tells me I'm a fucking failure and I should never eat ever again. I feel like I'm never going to make progress and I'm just gonna look like shit and hate myself until I take it to the grave. After 5 years of mental gymnastics with an ED I wish for nothing more than to be able to turn it off and be a normal fucking person for even a day. Anybody who thinks having an ED is a lifestyle choice clearly have no idea what we go through every single day
[Rant/Rave] No more guessing how much weight I've lost! I figured out how much water weight I carry :)
/u/CowOffTheFarm [65" | 145 | 24.41 | - | F | GW 120]
Created: Fri Nov 4 10:27:24 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b4jnh/no_more_guessing_how_much_weight_ive_lost_i/
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It's almost exactly three pounds. I weighed myself in the morning- 148. Later after a night of drinking, 147. Woke up dehydrated from the drinking 143. I feel like I can never trust the scale, but now I know the buffer zone is 3 pounds. It;s like a huge weight was lifted off my shoulders. Now all my goal weights will be in 5 pound increments. I can trust that 5 pounds is more than just water, weight, but actually fat loss.
I'M SO HAPPY NOW! So relived and freeing to not drive myself crazy over the scale but still trust it as a success-o-meter.
[Help] I know this question has been beat to death but how do you guys deal with a new relationship and disordered eating?
/u/HowToBeAsian25 [5'4 |113lbs |19.78 |-19 | F]
Created: Fri Nov 4 10:20:19 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b4i2s/i_know_this_question_has_been_beat_to_death_but/
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We are starting to spend a lot of time together. So I'll go full days without eating a single bite, and yeah, he thinks it's fucking weird.
Last time we hung out I finally ate some pizza and wings he bought to shut him up, but then next time we hang it's going to be the same thing. is there anything I can do or say to make myself seem a little more normal. He is already suspicious.
[Rant/Rave] Anytime I'm doing okay it just gets fucked up again [Rant/Rave]
/u/thefreckledfox_ [5'8" | 181.8bs | 27.34 | -37.2lbs | F | GW: dainty]
Created: Fri Nov 4 10:14:50 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b4gtz/anytime_im_doing_okay_it_just_gets_fucked_up/
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(Sorry for the wall of text, I'm just so upset and angry with myself)
For weeks I've been stuck in this awful restrict/binge cycle where I manage to restrict all day while I'm at work and then I undo all of my progress every night trying to "eat normally" (whatever) around my boyfriend.
Yesterday started off so amazing. I kept my calories under 200 all day, went for a run after work, and ate a small portion of dinner for about 500 calories. So good. I logged everything, my calories were mostly protein, I just knew that I was going to see a loss this morning. And then our friend came over and before I knew it we were smoking and eating ice cream and leftover Halloween candy like the fucking monster that I am.
Even today started off okay because seeing a gain on the scale always helps me stay in control that day, but for some reason my stupid brain saw bagels at work and decided to eat a whole Panera bagel *with cream cheese.* God damn it. God damn me. Diet coke, broth, and lettuce for the rest of the day.
I've just been this anxious mess of neuroses and it's like 50% of the time my fucked up ana brain thinks that not eating will help me feel better, and 50% of the time my fucked up BED brain thinks that eating a whole day's worth of calories in one sitting will make me feel better. And of course, nothing does. I'm still a whale, I'm still ugly, and my life is still a mess. I'm so useless that *I can't even not eat properly.*
And I love my bf and he's the only good thing in my life but in the last month we've gone from sex every day to sex maybe once a week which in my head can only mean that he is repulsed by my and is going to dump me soon, which only keep the Anxiety Wheel a-turning.
[Goal] Anyone want to join me in a binge free week? Day 5
/u/goodvibeswanted2
Created: Fri Nov 4 09:51:03 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b4bs2/anyone_want_to_join_me_in_a_binge_free_week_day_5/
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Post your progress below. Let's share our successes and setbacks and support each other.
My husband ordered these for me yesterday from DollsKill . ✨💕
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Nov 4 09:50:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b4bqy/my_husband_ordered_these_for_me_yesterday_from/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/32503766252745fe89e60455550b0b91?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=5759e4ae13e6199cf0c3d87cf20fd7f4
[Discussion] [Discussion] HAE noticed themselves becoming less picky?
/u/mace__face [5'6 | CW:112 | BMI:18.08 | GW:108 | F -16lbs]
Created: Fri Nov 4 09:45:32 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b4anj/discussion_hae_noticed_themselves_becoming_less/
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So I've always been a picky eater- had issues with certain flavors and especially certain textures. Now I've noticed since I've been restricting consistently over the past year that I like certain foods that I never used to. I know our tastebuds change and we do grow out of some picky habits but this seems different. Like I was the quintessential kid who hated veggies, but now I eat them so much more and not just bc they're safe, but bc I like them....idk maybe it's normal. Just wanted to see if anyone else felt like this.
Apologies: formatting.
[Discussion] Discussion Lowkey freaking out/ feeling guilty and scared
/u/Gabi_Cat [5'5" | CW:125 | BMI: 20.7 | -75 lbs | F]
Created: Fri Nov 4 09:35:28 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b48kr/discussion_lowkey_freaking_out_feeling_guilty_and/
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Hello everyone, I'm so thankful everyone is here to turn to because something really scary happened to me last night and I am still shook up.
To set the scene: I was watching 'Dying to be Thin' on Youtube and looking at thinspo on my phone when I suddenly got SUPER dizzy. I'm not talking 'getting-up-too-fast' dizzy I mean like earthquake in my brain, spinning and losing vision... Like most of us here I enjoy the lightheadedness of not eating or the starry-eyed vision that can come with dieting but I have never experienced anything like this.
I ended up passing out 3-5 times consecutively and falling/ hitting my head multiple times before I was able to bring my legs up to get the blood back to my brain. I was in a full body cold sweat and my body was pale as a green ghost.
I even ate yesterday! 1000 cals like normal, but I did exercise in between meals and I guess I didn't realize I had virtually no carbs/sugar (but I mean I used to fast for days so????) so my blood sugar got to 74 and I passed out. I'm not diabetic but my mom is and she ended up taking my sugar to see if that's why I passed out (it was) and forced me to drink two glasses of sweet tea and eat bread.
WHY I'M FREAKING: I'm worried about exercising/restricting because this has never happened to me and I was terrified. I legit hit my head and now our sink is broken because I tried to grab onto it as I was passing out. I didn't want to involve my mother but I didn't know how to make it stop and now she's going to be on my ass too. Can I get some encouraging words to re-motivate myself or does it seem like this will happen again (does anyone know how to avoid this/experienced this)??
[Discussion] DAE feel this way?
/u/tattoosandcoffeee [5'4 | GW 108 | -12]
Created: Fri Nov 4 09:25:35 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b46cp/dae_feel_this_way/
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I feel like I'm better at restricting and actually making progress when every aspect of my life is "in order" and I have nothing else to worry about. If anything is out of whack or my anxiety allows me to obsess over some other issue going on in my life..I fall off track and Its harder for me to be strong and not cave in and say F it. I've read a lot about people feeling this is "control" for them..And I feel that way to an extent, but I can only feel in control if I'm in control of every other part of my life first (work, relationship, finances..etc) I also have really bad ADHD and anxiety so the combo could be the reason for that. Im just a space head.
[Other] send me best wishes guys.... i need some good vibes rn
/u/citrus_cunt [5' 9"| 142lbs | 19.5| +5lbs | F]
Created: Fri Nov 4 09:23:52 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b45za/send_me_best_wishes_guys_i_need_some_good_vibes_rn/
---
i lost my phone yesterday and can't find it, theres a chance its at the polling place....ughhh this is what i get for protecting my constitutional rights....
plus i just paid off a traffic ticket and now i have like.... almost no money to pay off my monthly loan aaaaugh
who knows anything about donating plasma? like, how do i gt a physical to give them and will they turn me away? (my bmi is back to normal anyway) idk i just could use some love and good vibes from my fave community ti cheer me up rn <3 <3 <3
[Rant/Rave] I know this is irrational but...
/u/Alexa1p [5'5'' | 110 | 18 | -10.7 | F]
Created: Fri Nov 4 09:13:07 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b43pg/i_know_this_is_irrational_but/
---
Tuesday and Wednesday I didn't eat more than 400 calories. I weighed in at 109.5. Yesterday I ate maybe 1800 calories. Not that bad, I probably gained a very small fraction of a pound that I realize isn't a big deal. And yet I feel so much heavier and fat today. Ugh.
[Rant/Rave] "I was going anorexic haha"
/u/SkinnyWaifu [5'3 | fat | WL: -17.2 | GW: 105 | F]
Created: Fri Nov 4 08:57:14 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b40dw/i_was_going_anorexic_haha/
---
I know almost for a fact everyone here has heard the whole "I'll lose weight by going anorexic" and I'm sure I'm not alone in feeling infuriated by that phrase. On that note-
I have a roommate that is my same height (5"3) and weighs around 230lbs from what she's told me. She's about 90 lbs higher than I am. The thing is, she is the type of person who always has to "one up" me. I sort of kind of hinted about not eating much one day and she instantly started going off about how she's going to start eating jello and oatmeal alone, daily.
That by itself was annoying and triggering. I noticed for the next two days, she was indeed just eating jello and oatmeal. Until later that night when she thought I was sleeping, she seemed to have eaten an entire little caesars pizza , then looked up at me and just said "Ha ha, I was going anorexic, dude. I love food too much".
I don't know if this is going to be perceived as offensive or not. But it bothered the living shit out of me and I have nowhere else to rant.
[Rant/Rave] MAD AF
/u/teasnob22 [5'3" | CW: 95.7 | GW: 88 | 17.43 | -22 | F | Vegan AF]
Created: Fri Nov 4 08:56:50 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b40be/mad_af/
---
I went out tonight for the first time in like 60 years and holy shit every time I hiccup, ACID REFLUX. like yeah, I'm bulimic, but I s2g my body won't let me forget it for a second.
Jesus Christ at least let me enjoy a night out ED, at least give me that.
Please God
[Rant/Rave] my roommates are killing me with their dinners
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Nov 4 08:53:48 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b3zoq/my_roommates_are_killing_me_with_their_dinners/
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[deleted]
[Discussion] My stupid body clinging to water weight. Also what do you guys do for energy when fasting?
/u/setniessesed [5'11.5" | CW: 141 GW: 130 | 18.71 | -18lbs | 20/F]
Created: Fri Nov 4 07:00:19 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b3ei0/my_stupid_body_clinging_to_water_weight_also_what/
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[removed]
[Goal] Today is day 4 no binging... I'm happy, relieved, and terrified
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Nov 4 06:32:36 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b39ve/today_is_day_4_no_binging_im_happy_relieved_and/
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[deleted]
[Sticky] Weekly Selfie, Progress Pic and OOTD Thread! November 04, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Fri Nov 4 06:12:01 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b36lb/weekly_selfie_progress_pic_and_ootd_thread/
---
This is the weekly picture thread for November 04, 2016.
Feel free to share your selfies, progress pics or outfit-of-the-day (OOTD) pics in this thread!
**Rules**
1. Be nice, **or you will be banned.**
2. Please use [imgur](http://imgur.com/) as a host.
Consider adding commentary on featured brands, sizing, inspiration behind your OOTD (trying to look thin or cover up weightloss, etc.)!
**Remember that anyone can view the contents of this thread even if they are banned from this subreddit. If you receive unwanted messages, please contact the mods with a screenshot of the relevant messages. Note that even if we ban people, they can still message you, and they still have access to the contents of this subreddit. The best thing for you to do is to block them.**
*****
Selfie, progress pic and OOTD threads are posted every Friday.
Have any questions or concerns? Comment below, or [PM the mods.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FproED)
[Sticky] Daily Food Diary! November 04, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Fri Nov 4 06:11:53 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b36ku/daily_food_diary_november_04_2016/
---
This is a daily food diary thread for November 04, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
My childhood friend is looking really good nowadays.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Nov 4 06:05:33 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b35l6/my_childhood_friend_is_looking_really_good/
---
http://i.imgur.com/7qzfpf4.png
[Discussion] Losing With Out Calorie Counting
/u/WeighingDown [5'2" | 108 | 20.46 | F]
Created: Fri Nov 4 06:03:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b357s/losing_with_out_calorie_counting/
---
I have been counting calories since my ED started. I am wondering if anyone has had success losing with out counting calories. It is pretty stressful to always keep track and I feel like I end up just eating up to a limit instead of just eating as little as possible. My concern is that I won't have enough control and will end up eating more than my daily allowance for calories.
I have had a lot of success counting calories and I'm really good at it and usually eat 800 a day but I'm worried if I stop counting I'll eat too much.
What is your experince? Any tips or advice? Thanks!
**On mobile, sorry for lack of flair!**
[Rant/Rave] Will someone please reassure me that I won't go on a year long binge again?
/u/Ire_of_suburbia [5'4" | 85lbs | 14,6 | -53 | F]
Created: Fri Nov 4 05:17:53 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b2z08/will_someone_please_reassure_me_that_i_wont_go_on/
---
On mobile, can't flair as usual. This should be a rant/rave post though.
As some of you might know, I've been trying to maintain and failing miserably. To be fair, I've slowed down my loss significantly. Anyway, I've reached a point where I'm starting to feel kinda shitty, parents are threatening to hospitalize me and my BMI is getting dangerously close to the point where hospitals will admit me against my will. The rational part of my brain just wants to gain a few lbs and get to BMI 16-ish so I can get people off my back and avoid going from "feeling kinda shitty" to not functioning anymore.
MAN, THIS IS THE MOST STRESSFUL THING EVER. I just can't shake the fear that I won't be able to stop gaining. Like, not in a fatlogicky "omg what if my metabolism is broken and CICO suddenly stops existing" kinda way, I'm just scared that I'll lose control and I won't be able to go back to eating at my TDEE or below once I'm at my goal.
This fear is also fueled by my past attempt at "recovering" from summer 2014. I keep telling myself it's gonna be different this time. I'm in a whole different situation and mindset, I'm not as gullible as I used to be (I mean, I probably wouldn't have started binging at all if it wasn't for that bullshit Youreatopia website...), I have more experience, I'm SO MUCH more meticulous with my tracking, I know so much more about the sciencey-side of things and how to use that in my favor, I have my trusty TDEE spreadsheet, I eat in a different way that makes it way harder to accidentally overeat (nothing can stop an actual binge, though :/ ), my activity level is way higher which makes my TDEE insanely high and gives me a bigger budget... I could go on and on with all the reasons why I rationally know that I can control this. But none of it is enough to shut up the other side of my brain that's just freaking the fuck out because I'm terrified of [this](http://imgur.com/R4mhaVy) happening again.
Tl;dr: I'm freaking the fuck out about binges that haven't happened yet and I need help convincing myself that I won't lose control and make them happpen.
[Discussion] Hoarding
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Nov 4 04:29:24 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b2t4p/hoarding/
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[deleted]
[Discussion] DAE feel like their ED has ruined their social life
/u/frozensun202
Created: Fri Nov 4 03:39:02 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b2ndw/dae_feel_like_their_ed_has_ruined_their_social/
---
I always cancel my plans because I feel too big and tight in my clothes and can only go out if I have been fasting for two day beforehand and feel smaller, more comfortable in my clothes. Anyone else like this?
[Rant/Rave] Boredom bingeing
/u/FeedMeDreams [5'5" | 64.2kg | 23.6 | F]
Created: Fri Nov 4 02:35:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b2gzz/boredom_bingeing/
---
So this is my 6th day in a row of not purging, and I've been doing kinda well with not bingeing - I haven't had the kind of binge where you *have* to purge afterwards. It's actually been ok while I've been working; usually I struggle in the evenings, because I have nothing to do, but taking the long way home and going to bed early mean that I only have a few hours to kill each evening. But now it's Friday night, and I'm indescribably bored... I don't want to do anything. None of my friends are free, and if they were, I wouldn't want to see them, because it's too much effort. I don't have any hobbies because nothing is interesting. I don't want to watch tv or play a video game. I don't want to do any of the things I could do, or should do. There's nothing that I *have* to do, so I'm not doing anything. Normally I'd be bingeing right now, since it passes the time. But not tonight. I don't want to end up in my thirties or forties and still be bulimic. Five years is long enough. Tomorrow is going to be worse. I thought I could do this, but now I'm not sure.
Edit: had a cigarette and an apple, went for a long walk, now going to bed. Guess I'll deal with tomorrow when it happens.
[Help] My brain has been launching a mental assault all day and I don't know how much more I can take.
/u/isolatedintrovert [155cm | CW: 44kg | GW: 41 | UGW: 38 | 19.12 | F]
Created: Fri Nov 4 02:33:07 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b2gsh/my_brain_has_been_launching_a_mental_assault_all/
---
You don't have to read this. In fact, content warning for sexual assault, self-harm, and binge eating.
I just need to get this out and I don't know where else to turn. The people here are always so kind and supportive of everyone, I guess it just felt like a good place to turn. Mods, if this isn't the place to post this, I'll promptly delete it.
My brain decided to torture me today. First it made me dream that my rapist found out where I was living now because I was featured on TV due to an interview I did for my job (the interview/TV spot actually will air this month) and he approached me. I had a breakdown, but my husband got mad at me because I couldn't bring myself to have sex with him after that.
So, for the past 12 hours (it's now about 5:30 in the evening where I live) my brain has been zapping me with painful reminders of that dream and my past trauma/abusers. Somehow I managed to conduct myself at work as though my brain wasn't violently attacking me at every turn, but now that I'm home I'm on the verge of a breakdown akin to the one I had in my dream...
and for the first time in my life my brain/body want me to emotionally eat. (Usually when I'm emotionally spent/depressed/etc I can't eat at all.) I can tell if I give in and eat one thing, I'll eat another, and then another. I want to drown my sorrows in alcohol. I think I would legitimately not stop eating. I've always fallen more towards the anorexic/bulimic side of the spectrum, never binge eating...
I know if I give in (I'm so, so very tempted to give in) that I'll hate myself tomorrow. But I feel like it's either this, or harm myself (I used to self-harm more directly in the past). Though if I give in and binge eat for the first time, I may hurt myself tomorrow anyway.
I'm just so overwhelmed with negative emotions that I don't know what to do right now. I tried exercising. Tried distraction. Tried hugs. I'm completely at a loss and I feel like I'm spiraling out of control. I haven't even taken my first bite. If I feel out of control now, what would happen then?
I'm sorry. I know I'm rambling at this point... I guess I came here requesting any advice on resisting a binge?
If you read all of this, thank you.
**TL;DR** I think I'm on the verge of bingeing for the first time ever due to an emotionally tumultuous day. Does anyone have any advice to help me not do that thing?
[Rant/Rave] Return of the Jedi B/P Cycle
/u/carolineeo [5'7" | 101.8 | 16 | 22F]
Created: Fri Nov 4 01:35:24 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b2axt/return_of_the_jedi_bp_cycle/
---
Ugh I'd been doing so good lately. I keep seeing the binge free commitment posts on here and I want to join but I honestly don't think I have the willpower to foresee a week in advance that something won't trigger it. I went home today on my lunch break & made it relatively healthy version of comfort food, handful gf pasta w peas arugula & cheese, but I figured it was OK since I'd barely eaten in 2 days. made a snack of toast & jam for my way back to work... then got back to the office, started eating all the leftover twix, & went to our other building... where there was a box of donuts & a platter of sugar cookies. knew right then I was gonna fuck it all up. stuffed my face with donuts, chugged water, and off to the bathroom to undo all the damage. kill me.
[Rant/Rave] I hate "healthy" food
/u/kinaadman [5'1" | SW 210 | CW 110 | GW: 90 | F]
Created: Thu Nov 3 23:34:23 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b1wzu/i_hate_healthy_food/
---
so today i thought it was safe to eat about 100g of "vegetable chips" which said it was shaved cassava mixed with sweet potato tops and spinach and shit like that and i was like cool this sounds like a good meal
then when i looked it up it looks like i may have eaten 500 calories
i panicked got vertigo and purged and i don't plan to eat anything else for the rest of the day and i'm going to go attend muay thai class
fuck "healthy" food. don't eat anything without being certain of the caloric content (i.e., when you don't see a nutritional value table)
ugh
[Help] Sharp pains?
/u/Cockroach-Boy
Created: Thu Nov 3 23:14:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b1ue7/sharp_pains/
---
Hello all, this is my first time posting here. I can't flair because Im on mobile
Essentially I'm curious if anyone else ever experiences sharp stomach pains after/during a purge? I'm unfortunately stuck in a bit of a binge/purge loop, and occasionally it'll feel like there's a razor blade in my stomach. It doesn't usually last long, just the initial stabbing pain and then a slight throbbing for a minute or so until it's gone. It's started coming when I don't purge as well, but not nearly as often.
I can't tell if it's worth going to the doctor for (I don't even know what to say. My stomach hurts when I puke? Not really unusual) And if I open up about my eating habits to others I get judged too harshly making it worse. Any ideas what's causing it and how to make it go away?
My stomach after fasting yesterday 117 lbs
/u/frailraven [5'10 | CW 117 | LW 115 | F20]
Created: Thu Nov 3 22:42:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b1q2a/my_stomach_after_fasting_yesterday_117_lbs/
---
http://i.imgur.com/EG2N9sa.jpg
[Intro] Intentionally Relapsing
/u/kdkorz10211
Created: Thu Nov 3 22:32:42 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b1oph/intentionally_relapsing/
---
I'm on mobile, but I would flair this as an Intro.
I first started restricting my sophomore year of high school. I was already my current height, 5'5", and 120-something lb. The sad thing is that if I'd never restricted, I wouldn't have fucked up my metabolism, and I probably wouldn't weight nearly as much as I do now. But I'm getting ahead of myself. I restricted on and off throughout high school, but never lost too much weight as I was living with my parents and my mom paid a bit of attention to whether I ate dinner. At the end of high school I was eating somewhat normally and weighed around 140.
Then I left for UCSC. I started restricting again on my very first day away from home. Eventually I was eating one apple a week day and nothing but water on weekends, taking ephedra pills, drinking laxative tea, constantly wearing five lb weights on each ankle and one lb weights on each wrist, and compulsively doing jumping jacks. I got down to 109.
My mental health was total shit in multiple ways, and I ended up dropping out and doing intensive therapy. I started eating again and steadily gaining weight. This past year in particular the weight gain has been significant and I got up to 207 lb. I felt fucking awful, as I never wanted to be over 200 lb.
About a month ago I started restricting again. I know fully well that I'm diving head first back into ED territory, but I don't want to stop. I just want to lose weight. I'm at 194 lb now. My goal is 140, but I know I'll want to keep going once I get there. I'm smart and I know how stupid it is for me to do this, but I just don't care. Losing weight makes me feel accomplished. It's so nice to see progress on something over time.
I've always kind of known I would relapse eventually. My lowest weight was barely underweight and that always really bothered me – like I wasn't a "good" anorexic. I don't think I'll ever be able to leave it alone until I've gotten firmly into that "significantly low" weight range. So some part of me is even pretending this is good for me, like it'll get it out of my system or something, though I know that's not how it works.
Anyways, it's been really hard seeing my body like this. I literally could not perceive a difference between my body at 140 lb and my body at 109 lb, but I can definitely see the difference between 140 lb and my current weight.
It sucks, because I'm really into social justice generally, including fat acceptance, but while I'm all for other people of all sizes loving themselves, I can't stand my own fat. I feel like such a hypocrite.
[Rant/Rave] I binged today and I am fucking done.
/u/mmm_erythritol
Created: Thu Nov 3 22:09:59 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b1lbg/i_binged_today_and_i_am_fucking_done/
---
This is it.
I want to say in front of all of you–especially those who have inspired and supported me–that I quit.
I've said it before but none of those times matter now. Those were practice, or I wasn't totally committed, or I didn't have a clear enough plan in place. Whatever it is... I will not look at the past anymore and tell myself I can't do it just because I haven't succeeded yet.
I live in the present–in this moment, and every future moment, I am not bingeing.
So here is my little manifesto I've written in my phone as part of my new detailed food guidelines to make bingeing impossible:
>I will not eat because I am tired.
>I will not eat because I am sad.
>I will not eat because I am stressed.
>I will not eat just because others expect it.
>I will not eat just because something looks or sounds good–food will always be there.
>My goals will dictate how I eat, not my impulses.
>Not following these rules feeds the inner fat kid, and the inner fat kid MUST STARVE.
(I call my urge to binge my inner fat kid. It is a loathsome and bratty little creature and it's in time out.)
I'm not really sure what I'm trying to accomplish with this post.. I just felt the need to get it out there.
I am just. So. Sick. Of living like this.
[Goal] Beat my longest jogging time
/u/jiuel1 [5'4"(barely yay) | 122.6 | 20.9 | -12 lbs | F]
Created: Thu Nov 3 21:54:30 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b1itp/beat_my_longest_jogging_time/
---
All that because I felt bad about what I ate that day. I entered 40 minutes on MFP to see how many calories I'd lose doing that so I settled for it.
When I got home I immediatly put my running shoes on and headed out. After about 20 minutes I told myself that adding 10 more minutes after the 40 minute timer would make it 50 but I still thought "meh as if".
Time passes and cue the 40 minute alarm. I pressed start again to make it 50 so I beat my longest running streak of 40! Plus I apparently burned 242 calories doing so, I felt very proud of myself.
Still felt like I overate though but oh well.:/
(Sorry, self boosting because I had no one to tell it to.)
(Also can't flair atm, on mobile.)
[Rant/Rave] Meal Prep/Calorie Deficit Makes Me Want to Binge
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Nov 3 21:34:36 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b1ftl/meal_prepcalorie_deficit_makes_me_want_to_binge/
---
[deleted]
[Other] I feel wrong?
/u/thirdocean
Created: Thu Nov 3 20:35:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b169h/i_feel_wrong/
---
I used to binge (kinda) and purge. Then I stopped purging because I was around friends so much and I don't want to be caught. After 3 days of eating out, alcohol, and pop I gained 9 pounds. I know it can't all be fat. After a day I was back down 3 pounds. But I can't eat. I don't want to. Anytime I've eaten I've purged. I've had less than 1,000 calories in the last 48 hours and purged every time. I stopped biting my nails. I don't crave the Halloween candy in my apartment. I'm confused and happy. I want to just not eat for a month and be closer to skinny
[Intro] introduction & a fave poem (not mine)
/u/three_two_bone [5'3" | hw: 139 | cw: 114 | gw: 95 | 19F]
Created: Thu Nov 3 20:08:05 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b11ib/introduction_a_fave_poem_not_mine/
---
hi guys. I've stalked for a while but it's time I joined for real. you all seem very sweet and kind towards each other, which is so important when we all have that little voice inside that is just the opposite towards ourselves. anyway, I'll probably be posting a little from now on, I kinda know how it goes but feel free to share what you enjoy posting here, I'd love to hear it :)
I thought I'd include one of my favorite poems by Carl Ann Duffy, a British poet. I wouldn't be surprised if it had been shared here before, but here it is. I think it embodies both our ultimate dream and our worst fear in one.
**The Diet**
The diet worked like a dream. No sugar,
salt, dairy, fat, protein, starch or alcohol.
By the end of week one, she was half a stone
shy of ten and shrinking, skipping breakfast,
lunch, dinner, thinner; a fortnight in, she was
eight stone; by the end of the month, she was skin
and bone.
She starved on, stayed in, stared in
the mirror, svelter, slimmer. The last apple
aged in the fruit bowl, untouched. The skimmed milk
soured in the fridge, unsupped. Her skeleton preened
under its tight flesh dress. She was all eyes,
all cheekbones, had guns for hips. Not a stitch
in the wardrobe fitted.
What passed her lips? Air,
water. She was Anorexia's true daughter, a slip
of a girl, a shadow, dwindling away. One day,
the width of a stick, she started to grow smaller - ~
child-sized, doll-sized, the height of a thimble.
She sat at her open window and the wind
blew her away.
Seed small, she was out and about,
looking for home. An empty beer bottle rolled
in the gutter. She crawled in, got drunk on the dregs,
started to sing, down, out, nobody's love. Tiny others
joined in. They raved all night. She woke alone,
head splitting, mouth dry, hungry and cold, and made
for the light.
She found she could fly on the wind,
could breathe, if it rained, underwater. That night,
she went to a hotel bar that she knew and floated into
the barman's eye. She slept for hours, left at dawn
in a blink, in a wink, drifted away on a breeze.
Minute, she could suit herself from here on in, go
where she pleased.
She stayed near people,
lay in the tent of a nostril like a germ, dwelled
in the caves of an ear. She lived in a tear, swam
clear, moved south to a mouth, kipped in the chap
of a lip. She loved flesh and blood, wallowed
in mud under fingernails, dossed in a fold of fat
on a waist.
But when she squatted the tip of a tongue,
she was gulped, swallowed, sent down the hatch
in a river of wine, bottoms up, cheers, fetched up
in a stomach just before lunch. She crouched
in the lining, hearing the avalanche munch of food,
then it was carrots, peas, courgettes, potatoes,
gravy and meat.
Then it was sweet. Then it was stilton,
roquefort, weisslacker-kase, gex; it was smoked salmon
with scrambled eggs, hot boiled ham, plum flan, frogs'
legs. She knew where she was all right, clambered
onto the greasy breast of a goose, opened wide, then
chomped and chewed and gorged; inside the Fat Woman now,
trying to get out.
[edit: i cannot format]
[Rant/Rave] Purging
/u/xcris19x [5'3 | FATFATFAT | Fat | F | -13lbs | UGW: 90/95 |]
Created: Thu Nov 3 20:05:53 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b114d/purging/
---
I'm not sure what's wrong with me. I've never been a b/p person, but just now I made soup and I didn't want to throw it out (even though I didn't want to eat it) because wasting food (irony) - so I made the soup and I ate it and then I promptly weighed myself and went to the bathroom and shoved a toothbrush down my throat and kept at it until I felt as empty as I could.
I wish I felt better - I wish I could say I suddenly felt lighter or something like that. I feel like absolute shit. It wasn't even a binge. It was just in me and I didn't want it there.
Sorry, I just wanted to get that out of my system. Thanks for listening.
small update: I binged on three pickles and about a cup of pickle juice (because I have no idea why, probably just that I'm a piece of shit) and then purged about half that up. It was immediate. After it began to settle my stomach was just like 'nope' and I went back to the bathroom. Now I made some lax tea and I have a strange confession. Hence the edit.
I like the way I feel now after I purge- a good purge. My eyes water and my stomach sort of hurts. I like the control. I sort of feel kind of pretty afterwards. I'm all sorts of fucked up man. What is wrong with me...
[Rant/Rave] word vomit: why I restrict
/u/setniessesed [5'11.5" | CW: 141 GW: 130 | 18.71 | -18lbs | 20/F]
Created: Thu Nov 3 19:26:45 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b0u8f/word_vomit_why_i_restrict/
---
Hi guys I'm feeling alone in this and frustrated so I typed up a long random thought passage
I know it seems obvious, but I just realized I restrict because I can't stand the self hatred I feel when I balloon. to me, weirdly, it's separate from the want for a better body. I do obviously want it to look good, but the thing that motivates me the most is remembering how I feel when I overeat or am at a higher weight - that feeling of shame, it literally consumes me 24/7. It's like my brain is just lit up in agony constantly, it doesn't allow for anything else. I cannot quiet that voice screaming in my head until I shrink.
When I feel like eating again I remember how that felt and wonder if I can even endure it again without breaking. The last time I was bingeing I just broke down and sobbed on my studio floor and cut my leg all up with an exacto knife I found. I couldn't stand existing like that anymore without distracting and punishing myself.
I don't know where this feeling comes from or why it's so astoundingly intense. I wasn't bullied when I was younger or made fun of for my weight too much that I can remember.
I also only hate this disorder when I binge, not when I restrict. It's sad to me that I have much less energy and am more cold, but it's not the "this isn't how life is supposed to be" kind of feeling I get on the opposite end of the spectrum. I'm fine as long as I don't overeat and am not at a higher weight, and am losing weight; I'm happy and feel strong and independent.
I just want to be in that state forever, I never want to feel that agony again. But realistically I know I will, and it makes me afraid to know when.
[Other] Part-eating foods?
/u/twwyptm [5'5| CW 117 | GW 100 | F]
Created: Thu Nov 3 18:51:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b0nqq/parteating_foods/
---
I have a weird ED-related routine. I've searched this subreddit to see if it's common, but I'm starting to feel like I might be the only one?
So whenever I'm eating on my own, I will only eat particular parts of meals/foods. Examples:
* I will eat all the toppings off pizza, including the sauce, and throw away the base.
* I will eat all of the chocolate off a KitKat, and throw the wafer.
* I will eat the meat and cheese layers of a lasagne, and throw away the pasta.
* I will pick out and eat the chocolate chips of cookies.
* I will scrape out and throw away the inside of chunky chips (or fries, for American's) and just eat the oily/crispy skin.
etc etc
I've been doing this for years and years. It started during "recovery" when my ED first got very bad. I don't really know why I do it. I'm finding it impossible to break the habit though. I will avoid eating a lot of the above foods when I'm around other people, because eating the whole thing makes me very uncomfortable.
[Meme/Humor (SUNDAYS ONLY)] me single every day
/u/pencilwonder [175cm | why | NB]
Created: Thu Nov 3 18:47:20 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b0n1g/me_single_every_day/
---
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ir8JPJbNjV0
[Help] pls help restricting and drinking
/u/katerinavlaas
Created: Thu Nov 3 18:46:30 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b0mvz/pls_help_restricting_and_drinking/
---
[removed]
[Discussion] DAE have a really counterintuitive safe food?
/u/littlestpiglet [5'2" | CW: 102.2 | 18.69/19.36 | UGW: 98 | F]
Created: Thu Nov 3 18:23:07 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b0ilm/dae_have_a_really_counterintuitive_safe_food/
---
It seems like most safe foods (including most of my own) are low-cal, but I was wondering if anyone else had a particular safe food that doesn't seem like it should be a safe food. Something you can eat without feeling anxious/guilty/on the verge of binging, but that's pretty high cal.
For me, it's any sort of basic meat (pork chops, steak, chicken thighs, etc.). I feel totally okay eating a huge portion of meat (like, I can easily polish off a 12-oz steak) even though the calories are quite high and I would lose my shit if I ate an equivalent amount of, say, pasta.
[Discussion] To what degree do you believe an eating disorder and/or substance addiction is a choice?
/u/toastyhigh [5'4 | 105.6| F]
Created: Thu Nov 3 18:21:55 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b0idh/to_what_degree_do_you_believe_an_eating_disorder/
---
I've heard the quote that having an eating disorder isn't. What do you guys think? Also, not trying to be offensive, just interested in what other people have to say. Personally, I feel that some people are predisposed to a certain behavior but it is not so black and white, and there are certain choices that can be made.
[Rant/Rave] [Rant] apparently I can't read labels
/u/justanotherbrunette [5'7" | 140 | 22.63 | -5 | F]
Created: Thu Nov 3 18:20:44 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b0i49/rant_apparently_i_cant_read_labels/
---
On mobile, can't properly flair.
So I left for a break at work and went to the co-op to get something to drink to tide me over for the rest of the night. I'm doing 2-4-6-8 to stop me from binging and to help me restrict better, and today is a 2.
I found these Arnold Palmer drinks that were zero cal and organic. I got stoked, grabbed one, and headed back to work. Sat down at my desk and saw that it's iced tea and coconut water, but 80 calories a can. The packages are almost identical, and I grabbed the wrong one.
It's almost half my daily intake today. Even if I skip the 60 cal salad I made for dinner, I still won't be on track.
I'm so angry, and I'm angry that I'm angry about it.
[Help] how do ya'll cut out your binge foods?
/u/get-it_together [5'3" |160??| UGW 130 | F]
Created: Thu Nov 3 17:53:47 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b0d4m/how_do_yall_cut_out_your_binge_foods/
---
[removed]
[Other] The biggest let down
/u/rainbowsunshinedust [5'5 | 101 | 17.00 | GW 95 | F]
Created: Thu Nov 3 17:52:38 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b0cxj/the_biggest_let_down/
---
Is knowing your body will never be beautiful. I have an average face and shit body and no tits (I hang out with a bunch of buddies I can take shit from everyone but myself) I don't even care anymore. I will always be ugly. That makes me realize that this will never end.
[Rant/Rave] Was vibin my collarbones and then bummed myself out because of that bit of armpit fat you get when wearing singlet tops 😠
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Nov 3 17:34:03 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b09hr/was_vibin_my_collarbones_and_then_bummed_myself/
---
[removed]
[Goal] Feeling better about recovery
/u/charchar1779
Created: Thu Nov 3 17:04:19 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b03qv/feeling_better_about_recovery/
---
(On mobile so can't flair) I've been in recovery for the last few months (5ish) and it's been hard. It's not like I've gained much weight, I'm 106 now at 5ft 4.5in and at my lowest I was around 98-100 pounds. I attribute most of my weight gain to muscle growth because I've started more strength training and leg workouts to keep myself active so that I don't feel like I don't deserve to eat. I'm in high school and in my last hour, PE, we were playing dodgeball. Dodgeball starts a bit weird as the coach has us all lay on our stomachs with our feet against the wall so no one gets a head start. It's uncomfortable as hell. My hipbones, ribs, and knees are all digging into the hard wood of the floor and it hurts like a bitch lol. So there I am laying there when the skinniest girl I know, can't be more than 90-95 pounds, comes and lays down next to me. We'll call her Abby. Abby lays down next to me and says hi and says how uncomfortable it is to lay down. I say right and complain about my hipbones and ribs digging into the ground. She says exactly and then I say that my knees dig into the ground but when I lift them up my hips dig into the ground and vice versa. She says same, it sucks and then says,"There's some flaws in being skinny huh." I don't know if she was calling me skinny as well but I feel like it because we both were having the same problems with laying down on the hard floor. It seems pretty dumb thinking about it now but it really boosted my mood because I was in a bit of a funk today about my body image, my legs in particular.
[Rant/Rave] My weird chocolate obsessions
/u/loving_life0_0
Created: Thu Nov 3 16:59:41 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b02th/my_weird_chocolate_obsessions/
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Whenever I want something sweet I'd go to my stash of chocolate, and count how cals are in each to see if it will kill my under 400cal goal. But even if it meets my goal I don't eat it?!? And then the next day I end up buying more and just shove it in my stash but never eat it?!? And it's just there in my room, bags and boxes of chocolate for like 3 weeks, and for some reason I won't eat it, even if I want it it's confusing does anyone else do this?. I feel like I waste so much money a week buying sweets when I could save, but I can't control my self I have to buy it.
Can't flair in mobile ;( I feel like this is a rant though.
[Rant/Rave] Fat pictures from high school
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Nov 3 16:49:00 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5b00qv/fat_pictures_from_high_school/
---
[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] so this is absolute bullshit
/u/daeboo [5ft1/79lbs]
Created: Thu Nov 3 16:38:27 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5azykc/so_this_is_absolute_bullshit/
---
I know, I know, your problem areas wont be the first to lose weight blah blah blagh blaughr
But every single one of the 11lbs I've lost. Every single goddamn pound, comes from my hips (basically always nonexistent), my ribs (already prominent), my fingers (thanks, r.i.p. my ring collection), and the area between my shoulders and neck (just wtf).
This awful and ranty but I'm pissed. I'm pissed as hell. I'm angry that my body is a disgusting combination of huge arms, huge thighs, and random jutting bones in between. What the fuck, body. What the fucking fuck.
[Discussion] Skewed body perception
/u/antkings [GW 105 | BMI 20.4 | -79lbs | Male 20]
Created: Thu Nov 3 16:17:23 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5azuaj/skewed_body_perception/
---
Sometimes when I see myself in window reflections, I see someone average, erring on the skinny side. But as soon as I look in a mirror, I balloon into a lard ball. I can feel every part of my body start to roll and fold. Why???? Which is right?? Who is the real me?
Anyone else suffer from something similar?
[Help] After the harsh purge
/u/antkings [GW 105 | BMI 20.4 | -79lbs | Male 20]
Created: Thu Nov 3 16:14:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5aztry/after_the_harsh_purge/
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My throat is scratched, my tummy is roiling, my nose is stuffed. Even drinking water hurts a bit. Does anyone have any advice to recover from the harsh purges?
It always happens when I'm at work (probably because I'm there 24/7 and that's where I eat my food). I know I look like shit afterward, but I can't seem to stop myself sometimes.
(mobile flairlessness)
[Goal] Stepped on a scale for the first time in forever....
/u/possiblycurious [5'5"| 141| -9lbs| F]
Created: Thu Nov 3 16:06:55 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5azs5m/stepped_on_a_scale_for_the_first_time_in_forever/
---
So, I've been kind of guessing my weight based on how my clothes fit. I'm on my period & feeling a little squishy with all the water weight and eating A TON today. Husband bought a scale that calculates bone density, muscle mass, fat %, and water.
He hopped on & asked if I would too. I told him I was worried about me seeing the number, but didn't care if he saw. He folded a piece of paper & covered it for me. I thanked him for covering the number and said it had been a long time, since I had weighed myself. I figured I was around the 145 mark, but probably 150 due to the water weight and food.
He smiled and said, "It's less than that if you want to know." It was super sweet of him.
I'm pretty stoked knowing more for certain, and don't feel super miserable like I thought I would. Love that man.
[Rant/Rave] Fat pictures on Facebook.
/u/Light__Bright [5'2 | 137 |+40, -6 so far | F]
Created: Thu Nov 3 15:27:19 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5azjwi/fat_pictures_on_facebook/
---
Hello everyone. I've posted here before but I've mostly lurked for awhile because I have pretty much remained the same instead of losing. I deleted all of my old posts, so long story short, I was obese in middle school, lost 60 lbs/gained eating issues as a teenager, remained that way and fluctuating in my early 20s until I did a recovery program at my university and then gained a LOT.
I have still not gotten back to my highest weight in middle school, but dangerously close.
I don't feel like myself at this weight. When I see pictures I'm usually horrified, but it's gotten worse lately. Without giving away too much personal information, I am in the performing arts field (where there is always a ton of pressure to be thin and attractive anyway!) I was recently in a performance that got some notoriety, and I have been having to endure pictures of myself popping up everywhere on social media. There is one in particular that just looks like the Michillin man...SO horrible. It doesn't help that every other girl involved is absolutely stunning and like a size 00. I am the ONLY bigger girl involved and it has wrecked my self esteem. I have to get back to what I used to look like. I am so upset with myself that when I finally start getting recognized for my talent, it's when I'm fat!
I have more performances coming up in November and December, and I will be damned if I go up onstage again like this. /Rant
how much weight do you normally lose a week
/u/w-a-m-s
Created: Thu Nov 3 14:26:45 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5az6pk/how_much_weight_do_you_normally_lose_a_week/
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[removed]
[Thinspo] Snooker thinspo
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Nov 3 14:22:13 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5az5ne/snooker_thinspo/
---
http://imgur.com/a/7HZUj
[Tip] A subreddit plug for those suffering with binge eating...
/u/Orthatworks14
Created: Thu Nov 3 14:16:12 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5az4ah/a_subreddit_plug_for_those_suffering_with_binge/
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So I've posted this in a few other subreddits, but someone suggested I post it here as well..
I just wanted to give a plug to r/BingeEatingDisorder
We're trying to build up a community so we can help each other.
[Meme/Humor (SUNDAYS ONLY)] When you get sick and get excited because of all the weight you're gonna lose
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Nov 3 12:50:36 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5ayl6k/when_you_get_sick_and_get_excited_because_of_all/
---
https://imgur.com/gallery/Z3lML
When you get sick and get excited because of all the weight you'll lose
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Nov 3 12:44:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5ayjr8/when_you_get_sick_and_get_excited_because_of_all/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/086609e133a54dfc8661e58d63268346?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=d8ee2086af0f39d3635366730ce26a38
[Intro] I'm not strong enough to let go of my eating disorder.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Nov 3 12:40:29 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5ayiza/im_not_strong_enough_to_let_go_of_my_eating/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] finally have a bmi below 20, but still feeling huge
/u/eekcoffee [5'7'' | 128lbs | 19.98 | -28 | F]
Created: Thu Nov 3 12:15:52 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5aydin/finally_have_a_bmi_below_20_but_still_feeling_huge/
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So these last two days have been amazing in that I've finally dropped down to the 120s, giving me a bmi of below 20.0 :D however, i can't see any difference. at all. i used a tape measure to see how big my waste was and it's still about 30 inches. i feel like this is huge.. i even adjusted my UGW since i'm getting closer and not seeing any difference. ugh i just want to be thin and dainty and beautiful and frail already. rant over...
Body check 11/2 117 lbs
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Nov 3 12:00:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5ay9wl/body_check_112_117_lbs/
---
http://i.imgur.com/A0VAmc2.jpg
[Rant/Rave] The basket of Halloween candy that's sitting right in front of me
/u/yummmies [5'4" | 115 | 20.0 | -50 | F]
Created: Thu Nov 3 11:46:06 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5ay6uy/the_basket_of_halloween_candy_thats_sitting_right/
---
Just because I didn't go out and buy leftover candy doesn't mean everyone else didn't apparently. 🙃 lord give me strength
[Discussion] Fitbit friends? 💕
/u/bougainvilleas [5'5.5" | 99-104?? | GW 89]
Created: Thu Nov 3 11:27:26 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5ay2r8/fitbit_friends/
---
just got a new Fitbit—the Flex 2 ([so pretty!](http://imgur.com/a/e60ms))—and would love to add people. it's so much fun to do step competitions, etc :)
here's my user page: https://www.fitbit.com/user/525VZ3
comment or PM me yours if you want to be friends?
[Intro] Hello again!
/u/Glitter_Vega [5f7 | Lots | Embarassing | -38 | Queer]
Created: Thu Nov 3 11:18:15 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5ay0qd/hello_again/
---
Formerly ED_Throwaway_ - I guess after 6 months, I decided I needed an actual name.
That combined with a Creepy Creeperton sort who decided to start PMing me (and making new accounts when I blocked, ick), pushed me towards it.
Anyway, hello again all :) Nice to be back.
[Rant/Rave] [Mini rant] Want to binge and sleep instead of seeing boyfriend this weekend.
/u/PooTeeWeet5 [5'5 | CW: 148lb of fat | BMI: 25 | Goal: 118 | F]
Created: Thu Nov 3 10:39:35 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5axs1y/mini_rant_want_to_binge_and_sleep_instead_of/
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My boyfriend and I have been fighting a lot lately. This weekend I'm supposed to stay with him (he lives about 2 hours from me). The last time we saw each other was at my place - we fought and he left and went back home.
I don't want to see him this weekend. I don't want to deal with any of that. I just want to order pizza and chinese food and binge and purge and sleep until Monday.
I am such a fat, shitty girlfriend.
[Discussion] "Foodie" recipe blogs with calorie counts?
/u/antimeridian [mellon collie and the infinite fatness]
Created: Thu Nov 3 10:26:50 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5axp9m/foodie_recipe_blogs_with_calorie_counts/
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Anyone know of any good recipe blogs that also list the calories? I'm the type of person who'd prefer to eat an extremely small portion of good food (though nothing super calorific ofc) than a large portion of bland-yet-filling food.
[Rant/Rave] Best friend woes (rant/ support?)
/u/Isuckatus3rnames
Created: Thu Nov 3 10:18:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5axnke/best_friend_woes_rant_support/
---
Hello everyone, I (20F) recently joined reddit and quickly found this sub (terribly sorry in advance if I make any blunders).
Anyways, a little bit of background info before I cut to the chase. I had an ED through most of high school and first year uni, I still struggle with it most days but as of this year I started to finally think about a little less....
Right until my best friend came up for a visit. She goes to school out of the country so I only see her a couple times a year.
She has always been larger than me, not exceptionally so, but because she's like an inch or two shorter it was visible. However her last visit has me a little envious to say the least. She's smaller than me by quite a bit now. I couldn't stop starring at her wrists and comparing them to mine during dinner, as well as how much she ate vs. how much I did.
Now I just feel like I want to go back to my old ways so that I'll be smaller than her when she visits next.
I just feel so lost. And gross, very gross.
(Sorry for any mistakes this was done on mobile)
Tl;dr: my best friend is thinner than I am and it makes me sick.
[Other] I just bought a massive amount of on sale Halloween candy.
/u/lilialley
Created: Thu Nov 3 09:55:22 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5axib0/i_just_bought_a_massive_amount_of_on_sale/
---
I have a big bowl of all of my favorites sitting in the living room. Reese's, Kit-Kats, Twix, Snickers, Milky Way...I'm imagining myself walking in there, digging my hands in, and eating it handful after handful. It's probably around 10,000 calories worth of candy. I just went in there and gave it a big, creepy sniff.
I don't know why I bought it. I'm trying to avoid the binge. I think that I'm going to force myself to not eat until I've finished my homework entirely, and then I'll just never eat!
[Rant/Rave] I hate how quickly the cold comes back.
/u/smokesanddietcokes [Everybody's Fool]
Created: Thu Nov 3 08:32:00 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5ax0yp/i_hate_how_quickly_the_cold_comes_back/
---
I've been eating to maintenance/overeating (although thankfully no legit binging) for the past week and a half instead of fasting/restricting, mainly on carbs but generally a lot of everything. I wanted to make sure I had the energy for a race, and then when the race was done I spent halloween and the day after with my partner and we ate a lot.
I felt so warm. It was such a nice change from being cold all the time. Thinking about it... It was strange actually, I don't remember feeling a warmness like that before. I would feel the cold on my skin in a sense, at least some kind of cold sensation on the surface, but I wouldn't *feel* it deep down. It was like, inside my body was a furnace. Everyone else at the race on Monday was bundled up against the cold with so many layers of clothes, even whilst they were running. I felt fine in just a t-shirt, everyone commented on it (especially since all my friends there know I usually feel the cold more than anyone else). It was so cold that I found my hands stiff and hard to move by the end of the night (I didn't even wear the gloves I took with me), but not once did I *feel* them cold? If that makes sense. Everything inside me was so, so warm.. I didn't even shiver once.
Anyway. That's neither here nor there. Yesterday I began restricting again. I ate around 600kcal total, so not even all that low... yet today? Once again, I'm absolutely freezing. I'm shivering just getting out of bed, feeling the coldness deep inside me.
I'd have thought the heat would have lasted a little longer :( now I don't want to go out because I'm feeling it so much.
I wish I understood my body.
[Rant/Rave] XS sized clothes are rare and expensive [rant]
/u/k-w- [5'5 | CW 95 | F]
Created: Thu Nov 3 08:26:16 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5awzu6/xs_sized_clothes_are_rare_and_expensive_rant/
---
sorry for no flair, I'm on mobile
I hear all the time about how it's so hard to find clothes in larger sizes. That's true to an extent, most of the clothes you see in stores are S, M, or L. There is no XXXL at American Eagle or Aeropostale. But there are plus sized sections and plus sized stores people can go to, and some of them are pretty fashionable. I believe Forever 21 has one.
I'm now getting to the point where a size small is a bit too big, and my size 2 skinny jeans don't look like skinny jeans and I keep having to pull them up. If I want clothes in XS, I can't go to the thrift store downtown. In fact, I can't go to *any* of the stores in my town because the smallest size is S. I have to go to the fucking mall, which is 30 min from my house, and which I hate (thanks, anxiety disorder <3) and go to American Eagle or Aeropostale and spend a crazy amount of money on new clothes. The best part is, even at these stores, XS sizes are uncommon! A lot of shirts and dresses are only available down to S, and there are no stores or sections geared towards small sizes, unless I'm gonna shop in the kids section (which I'm considering, but the pink and sparkly tees are not my style).
And I don't have any money! I have about $500 in the bank saved from an internship I did over the summer and, thanks to a mental breakdown I had about a month ago, I'm not gonna be able to get a job anytime soon. I live with my parents. I need this $500 to last.
I wish I hadn't gotten rid of most of the clothes I wore in 6th/7th grade. Especially my jeans. That's the biggest problem right now, I can deal with loose fitting shirts but my pants slide down and look baggy and I only have one belt. The high waisted ones are alright, but I only have a couple of those and the pockets are fake. Ugh.
[Goal] This guy Im thinging with 24/7 motivation
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Nov 3 08:19:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5awymk/this_guy_im_thinging_with_247_motivation/
---
[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] I haven't showered in 2 days because I can't bear to touch myself.
/u/shillacct2016 [5'4" | 150 | 25.7| Weight Lost | Gender]
Created: Thu Nov 3 08:14:26 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5awxhs/i_havent_showered_in_2_days_because_i_cant_bear/
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I've been bingeing for more than a week, it's like I want to hate myself enough to just give up on everything. I'm so huge. I'm so uncomfortable in all this fat.
Sorry about the sob story, I'm just trying out the share your pathetic feelings thing in a sub that seems to understand.
[Discussion] How many of you ever feel like maybe you were just born to be fat?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Nov 3 08:05:34 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5awvsb/how_many_of_you_ever_feel_like_maybe_you_were/
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[deleted]
[Help] Sick and still restricting?
/u/Alkylhalides [Height | CW | BMI | Weight Lost | Gender]
Created: Thu Nov 3 07:59:27 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5awukr/sick_and_still_restricting/
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I've been heavily restricting for the past couple weeks (with the occasional alcohol binge) and now I'm really sick with a horrible sore throat, no voice, and all congested and dying basically. Should I just eat normally until I get better? Will I gain too much or will it balance out because I'm sick? Does anyone have any low-calorie nutritious foods to eat when sick?
[Discussion] (Discussion) did everyone see that a guy got hep c from drinking too much energy drink?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Nov 3 07:01:12 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5awk7x/discussion_did_everyone_see_that_a_guy_got_hep_c/
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https://www.google.com/amp/www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-3895972/amp/Man-50-got-hepatitis-energy-drinks-Doctors-issue-warning-consuming-patient-five-cans-day-developed-disease.html
[Sticky] Weekly Emotional Support November 03, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Thu Nov 3 06:07:45 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5awbu9/weekly_emotional_support_november_03_2016/
---
We're almost all dealing with quite stressful things outside of our eating disorders. Whether it be complicated relationships, friends, university, work or other mental illnesses like depression, anxiety or OCD, we all seem to be having a rougher time emotionally and mentally than the general population.
Use this thread to post about your problems or ask for advice concerning things other than EDs/ED behaviors.
**As always, follow the sub rules when reading or posting.**
*****
Weekly emotional well-being and support threads are posted every Thursday.
Have any questions or concerns? Comment below, or [PM the mods.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FproED)
[Sticky] Daily Food Diary! November 03, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Thu Nov 3 06:07:37 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5awbti/daily_food_diary_november_03_2016/
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This is a daily food diary thread for November 03, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
[Help] DAE have a really thin friend who eats more than you do?
/u/LazyFawn [165 cm | 54.4 kg | 19.98 cuz im petty | 18 f]
Created: Thu Nov 3 05:05:56 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5aw390/dae_have_a_really_thin_friend_who_eats_more_than/
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it pisses me off. she eats a white bread and nutella for breakfast along with iced tea, she eats a huge sandwich for lunch, we go to mcd after school sometimes and she gets the 20 nugget box thing.. and eats it all. i eat fucking 4??
and shes still 15 kilos lower weight than me. like wtf. why. how. i eat an egg for breakfast, i skip lunch. i eat below 1000 kcal every day, usually around 500. i run, i do yoga. she doesnt fucking do shit
and like. i feel super guilty about it too, she's one of my best friends. and like. this fucked up hate towards her. she doesn't deserve that at all. i just can't seem to stop myself from thinking like this :(
anyone else been in a similar situation? tips on overcoming it?
[Rant/Rave] I've always been a little underweight and had trouble with food, now I've decided I want to lose a stone and have started eating <800kcal a day. Why am I doing this?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Nov 3 05:04:48 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5aw344/ive_always_been_a_little_underweight_and_had/
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[deleted]
[Help] Hey fellow babes! I'm just trying to calorie restrict hard and do moderate cardio to help. I've been loooking up lots of intermittent fasting but with low calorie consumption.. if anyone tries that fasting let me know your results!
/u/1exiehope
Created: Thu Nov 3 04:41:03 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5aw06c/hey_fellow_babes_im_just_trying_to_calorie/
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[removed]
[Rant/Rave] So envious of my coworker
/u/erythridoll
Created: Thu Nov 3 04:32:38 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5avz7x/so_envious_of_my_coworker/
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The woman I share my office with is so skinny, but that's not even the reason I'm envious (though, I mean, I AM envious of that, but still lol).
I have no self control when it comes to food. I can fast and make sure I have no junk food around me, but if you put it in my sight I turn into a monster.
My office mate however always has snacks available for herself and whoever wants them. She keeps a bag of Oreos, a bag of peanut butter pretzels, a jar of peanut butter, a jar of marshmallow fluff, a loaf of bread, a two liter of full sugar soda, and now a pile of Halloween candy at her desk. And she barely touches any of them! I'm so envious of her self control, I know for a fact that if I had that stuff at my desk I'd destroy it all within a couple of days. She's inspiring too, though. It makes me want to have a more nonchalant attitude about food instead of obsessing over it constantly.
(Sorry I guess this is a rant but I'm on mobile and can't flair)
[Rant/Rave] Today was not a good day [Rant/Rave] tl;dr
/u/xcris19x [5'3 | FATFATFAT | Fat | F | -13lbs | UGW: 90/95 |]
Created: Thu Nov 3 03:34:16 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5avst9/today_was_not_a_good_day_rantrave_tldr/
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I was at work and we were doing shipment. It's retail so lots of boxes. We completed about 30 boxes, still have 34 in the back and 18 in the front. You get the picture.
Anyways, I was helping to load carry-over and over-stock boxes into our overhead storage platform. My supervisor was struggling with a set of boxes that wouldn't fit and I asked her if she wanted me to climb up on to the top of the platform and adjust more directly.
We are technically not supposed to do this but we are technically not supposed to do a lot of things that we do anyways. So I ask and she says that previously an ex-supervisor used to do that, "but she was super tiny. Like, 110 tiny." I'm like, okay... I don't respond and she goes on to add, "yeah she's super tiny, so, no offense but, ya know" ... I just sort of nodded and walked back to the register.
You guys, it takes a lot to get to me, but this did it. I was actually feeling REALLY good about myself today. I had on leggings, my shiny boots, a long shirt/dress with Polo collar that looked super cute on me. I did my makeup and was wearing my favorite most over-sized sweater; I almost took a picture for this sub I was feeling so proud. But that killed me.
I died in that moment. I binged later because who the fuck cares but now all I'm looking forward to is tomorrow when my wife goes to work, when I'm alone, when I can purge and purge and purge until I'm nothing. I mean seriously, just fuck me. I'm such a fat fucking whale.
Tl;dr: I was feeling sort of good about myself today until my supervisor said I was fat.
[Thinspo] Is this too extreme
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Nov 3 03:29:55 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5avsct/is_this_too_extreme/
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https://oddshot.tv/shot/Uzoo-EeIo-FM76Yi86Q7g_aA
[Discussion] Anyone want to join me in a binge free week? Day 4
/u/goodvibeswanted2
Created: Thu Nov 3 03:14:20 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5avqs1/anyone_want_to_join_me_in_a_binge_free_week_day_4/
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Feel free to post your progress below. Don't hesitate to join if you're just now finding the thread.
Starting Today. Need to stay on track ate 800kcal yesterday :(
/u/ResurrectionOfMarion
Created: Thu Nov 3 03:08:24 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5avq68/starting_today_need_to_stay_on_track_ate_800kcal/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/3cdc6467a34247ac9bafeb13660d15de?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=bdeca74abc8fdf8e65bc71fac0af1e21
[Rant/Rave] Anyone else obsessive to the point of distress?
/u/nicfrae [5'7 | GW<116 | -54lbs | F24]
Created: Thu Nov 3 02:58:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5avp8e/anyone_else_obsessive_to_the_point_of_distress/
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So today I planned out my calories before I even left the house, they added up perfectly to just under 700 - my limit for November. I get to the store and the soup I was going to buy is out of stock. This very nearly ruined my whole day. I had to scour for something similar, something that wouldn't fuck up my calculations or put me over my limit, I was pissed off at the store for selling out (I know), pissed off at myself for how much this affected me. Almost had a panic attack. I stood there for ages, inputting different combinations into MFP to work out what I could and couldn't buy and the whole time I was thinking how it fucking sucks that I can't just pick something up and buy it.
Just at the point where I'm about to throw in the towel and binge (3 days into November, I'm pathetic), I go for some chicken and a salad. 95 cal salad + 100 cal chicken = I'm at something like 690 for the day. Perfect.
I'm almost proud that I had that willpower to stick to my plans although my mind was already in self sabotage mode. However I got home and plugged the info into MFP, and turns out the chicken is 100 cal per 100g, so for the whole pack is something more like 125 cal. Not the end of the world, no. Only now I'm over 700 for the day by like 15 cal and I CANNOT get over it. I feel like a failure no matter how much I try to remind myself I was seconds away from consuming maybe double that. I know I've already burned that 15 off today but its the principle I guess. Why can't I just be normal... I see these people who pick up the food they want without checking the calories, without comparing to the other stuff, they're in and out within minutes. I wonder why I can't be like that. Then I remember that I WAS once, but I was also fat, so I go back to my miserable obsessive counting. This has to be the better alternative. I keep telling myself so anyway.
[Discussion] What does your ideal body look like?
/u/taeyeons-comrade [perpetual shame]
Created: Thu Nov 3 02:57:35 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5avp4f/what_does_your_ideal_body_look_like/
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I'm curious about what other people wish they could look like. My "ideal body" changes all the type. Some days I want to be fit-skinny, some days I want to be bony and emaciated looking and sometimes I wish I could be curvy and not feel fat.
At the moment, I want [this](http://i.imgur.com/TWj42zc.jpg)
[Rant/Rave] Counting down the days...
/u/Ciggiesandtea [159 cm | CW:whale | GW: 50 kg| 24/f]
Created: Thu Nov 3 02:10:07 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5avkj9/counting_down_the_days/
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(rant, sorry can't flair on mobile)
I made the worst mistake of my life by accepting roommates 4 months ago . They're die-hard foodies and have bodies to go along with it.
They constantly offer me food (which I admit is delicious) and freak out at the minor suspicion that I might be fasting or restricting. It's gotten to the point where they make me sit down and eat in front of them (I am nowhere near stick-THIN). This has made me go into binge/purge mode, I've obviously gained weight and I hate it.
I'm counting down the days till my lease is up so I can be on my own again and get back to staring at my gloriously zero calorie fridge.
[Thinspo] Buzzfeed's unintentional reverse thinspo?
/u/hatemyfat
Created: Thu Nov 3 00:39:19 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5avav0/buzzfeeds_unintentional_reverse_thinspo/
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http://m.imgur.com/a/4DUG3
[Rant/Rave] Panicking from "overeating"
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Nov 2 23:59:30 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5av5wu/panicking_from_overeating/
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I'm having to hide the scale so I don't weigh myself for a few days. I just CAN'T see a number even .1 lb higher.
I had fast food from 2 different places today giving me 1300 cal and 87 grams of fat :(( can't stop crying. My stomach feels so big and pregnant
[Rant/Rave] Spent 20$ on candy
/u/KajaIsForeverAlone [height:5'9 | CW: 135 BMI:20 | weight lost:25 lbs | Gender: F]
Created: Wed Nov 2 22:58:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5aux4s/spent_20_on_candy/
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Ate a whole bag, and like half a bottle of laxatives. And now I've actually gotten sick. Sick sick. I've been depressed lately
Please kill me
[Thinspo] Extreme trigger | Cure for my slackerism
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Nov 2 22:56:13 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5auwql/extreme_trigger_cure_for_my_slackerism/
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aaXBYcfVYZM
[Discussion] DAE feel like their ED is constantly changing faces?
/u/fiddlydiddly [5'4 | 125 lbs | 21.9 | -115 lbs | F]
Created: Wed Nov 2 22:33:11 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5aut1l/dae_feel_like_their_ed_is_constantly_changing/
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Hey everybody,
I've been struggling a lot recently and have finally decided I really need to jump on getting help. Not really sure if that means recovery or just steadily trying to get "better", but I can't really take this anymore.
However, I'm discouraged because it seems like every few months or even weeks my ED is different. I was bulimic for two years three years ago, it went away suddenly and I ate intuitively for the years following and maintained. In February when I relapsed, I was restricting at around 800 kcal a day but didn't count macros. I dropped weight dramatically, then it stopped. Started leaning more towards orthorexia at this point and was pretty obsessive about my macros and what types of food I was eating, but my calorie intake increased. Then my chronic digestive issues became suddenly much worse, leading to great weight fluctuations from water/food and this stress lead to binging and purging again.
Thankfully I've managed to be binge free for about a week now, but now I've started fasting consistently because it's so simple, but it really negatively impacts my schoolwork and relationships. It keeps changing and I just don't know how to handle it, the only thing that stays the same is the obsession over food and thinking about it constantly.
I'm just so tired. This shouldn't be my life, shouldn't be what I think about the most. I should think about my life goals, my career, my wonderful boyfriend and family, hobbies. Not fucking food. :(
[Meme/Humor (SUNDAYS ONLY)] Maybe I should just eat these. My cat seems to like them.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Nov 2 22:06:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5aupg7/maybe_i_should_just_eat_these_my_cat_seems_to/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/7923e0ae885f44f8af9e0f5e9151f9c2?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=c6b88f02b1393fe0e3eb43915f813991
[Discussion] you know you're sick when...
/u/miniatureti [5'4 | CW 142 | GW 115| -15.5 | F]
Created: Wed Nov 2 21:51:50 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5aun7b/you_know_youre_sick_when/
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you're happy that you threw up after taking a shit ton of pills. because if i'm not gonna die at least i get to throw up without my fingers down my throat, am i right ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
also, hey it's been a while since i posted on here. i think i made one post and then right back to creeping
[Rant/Rave] Fed up
/u/the_caffeine_queen [5'4" | 145 | 25 | constantly in flux | F]
Created: Wed Nov 2 21:20:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5auinb/fed_up/
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I'm so tired of being this way, but I feel like I can't escape it.
Last year, I started binge eating after years of restriction, and gained 20 pounds.
Last semester, I started therapy, and really really started working to fight my disordered eating and terrible body image. I lost 15 pounds and gained significant muscle and finally felt sort of good about myself? (even though I wasn't at my lowest weight) I felt healthy.
Now, I'm up to my highest weight ever. I'm overweight for the first time in my life.
This summer, I was working a super physical job where I couldn't eat during the day, so I would come home every night RAVENOUS and binge. My weight stayed about the same, because of the physical nature of the job.
I also faced a lot of sexual harassment on the job. Men would objectify me and make comments about my body... and it just put me in this horrible mental cycle where if they said something I felt like an object but if they didn't say anything, I felt even worse.
Now, I'm fat. I hate being this way so so much. I haven't gone 2 days without binging since moving back to school. I'm stuck in a binge-restrict cycle and I don't know how to break it. I restrict to numb the pain. I binge to mask the pain. Restricting feels so so good. Binging feels just as good. Then guilt. Then restriction. Then a little voice-- what if you just tried to eat healthily again? Then a binge. Then another voice-- see, that's why you can't be trusted to eat. Then restriction.
And isn't it sad? I wish men would notice me again. That's all I want or care about. I want men to find me fuckable. I'm getting a degree in computer science from a prestigious university, am involved in many leadership and volunteer positions, and am working on publishing my writings... but none of that matters because a random man hasn't told me he thinks my ass looks good since August.
The last time I had sex was a month ago and I've gained 5 pounds since then. I worry that the guy (who I see every week) must think, "Oh my god, she really let herself go, thank god I didn't stick with that."
I sit in the dining hall and all I can think about is "Oh my god, everyone here knows that you gained so much weight, they all know how fat you are now, little fat piggy" and my way of saying "fuck you" to that is to binge?
I feel hopeless. Like I had some sort of HOPE last semester, I could finally be healthy, I could finally feel good about myself... but now I feel like even if I get back to that place again, it will be futile because I will just end up crashing again.
I'm tired of eating nothing and then eating everything. I'm tired of wondering what every man around me thinks. I'm tired of not feeling like a human. I'm tired of being a human. I'm tired of being a woman. I'm tired of letting my obsession with my body overshadow everything I've worked so hard to accomplish. I'm tired of not working hard enough to my body something I'm proud of.
[Thinspo] Thinspo: sun kissed and perfect
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Nov 2 21:11:13 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5auha2/thinspo_sun_kissed_and_perfect/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/62e2508c09c349649db1fd4b7ae0542d?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=a7c71ad06dd3870e9ba956492371b3e3
[Help] I loved purging
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Nov 2 20:40:25 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5auc2r/i_loved_purging/
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[deleted]
[Goal] After months of binge eating and gaining 20 lbs, I've finally been able to lose 2 lbs...
/u/lily_nienna [6'3" | 166lbs | bmi 20.7 | + 6 lbs (T.T) | F]
Created: Wed Nov 2 20:23:32 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5au92h/after_months_of_binge_eating_and_gaining_20_lbs/
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Ever since I moved to Minnesota in May, my life has been a depressing mess, and of course I coped by binge eating junk food and ended up gaining all the pounds I had managed to lose beforehand plus more. I'm now on a med regimen (Effexor, Wellbutrin, Adderall, among numerous others...) that has totally killed my appetite. The mere thought of eating makes me feel queasy, and so I've finally managed to lose a few pounds. It's so liberating! I just hope it lasts, because I know that the appetite suppressing side effects of most medications tend to wear off as your body adjusts...
Anyway, thanks for reading and have a nice day! <3
[Help] Want to help me guess the calorie count? (Please)
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Nov 2 19:47:28 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5au2ke/want_to_help_me_guess_the_calorie_count_please/
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http://imgur.com/u0bBwbT
[Rant/Rave] I stayed under my calories but I still feel like a whale...
/u/TitsWithRoses [5'3" | CW:160 |-21 | GW:107]
Created: Wed Nov 2 19:00:47 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5atu9b/i_stayed_under_my_calories_but_i_still_feel_like/
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I only ate 800 kcal all day, but I still feel like a gross blob. I've been losing so much because of restricting, why do I feel like this? The only time I feel good is when I eat nothing at all...
[Rant/Rave] MRW it's 2am and I have coursework due tomorrow but I'm too busy B/P
/u/copofteashirt
Created: Wed Nov 2 18:56:03 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5attdi/mrw_its_2am_and_i_have_coursework_due_tomorrow/
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http://i.imgur.com/QGkcbyO.gif
[Rant/Rave] cancelled my trip because i'm too fat :') (rant)
/u/thukui [5'3 | 114 | GW 88 | -16 | 20F]
Created: Wed Nov 2 18:13:38 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5atlph/cancelled_my_trip_because_im_too_fat_rant/
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i wanted to write this here cause no one else will understand. I was supposed to go to vancouver (canada) to visit family with my bf for 5 days, but i cannot bring myself to go because i'm so disgusting and fat right now!
when i saw that side of my family this time last year i was at my lw of 108. i wanted to be at least that, if not skinnier before i saw them again but i've been binging for like 2 weeks and now i'm like 120 again. ugh! i'm always in competition with my sister and she's way skinner than me and loves to squeeze my fat so i just keep picturing her poking and squeezing my butt and stomach.
my bf is so mad at me for cancelling but i can't really tell him why i don't wanna go lmao. oh well
I used to get called thunder thighs. The name calling has stopped. (Cant flair mobile)
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Nov 2 18:09:47 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5atkx5/i_used_to_get_called_thunder_thighs_the_name/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/481d0747440543d1ac64efedfb4d2bb1?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=a933886a2dbbf27fd5e569981e1534ac
I was active today
/u/BlackGirlSteeze
Created: Wed Nov 2 17:15:38 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5atanb/i_was_active_today/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/08c17a085bc24d95bfe84123e7780a2f?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=78e3a63dc3f9c4e6647c3f7fd6abcc27
[Rant/Rave] I've spent three days binging and three days hating myself as a result.
/u/GingerrWithASoul [5'6 | 126.4 | 20.48 | Female]
Created: Wed Nov 2 16:22:31 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5aszzf/ive_spent_three_days_binging_and_three_days/
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Yet I can't stop. I'm still eating as I type this. I'm in physical pain from how full I am but it's not enough. I'm aware that I should stop but I can't. It's like I'm punishing myself for binging by binging more.
[Discussion] just figured out my biggest trigger for restricting
/u/getrekt3
Created: Wed Nov 2 15:53:05 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5astup/just_figured_out_my_biggest_trigger_for/
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my best friend and i basically just broke up our friendship after hanging out and talking almost every single day for years. we had a really intense friendship, but it got really toxic in the end. sucks cuz we both care still, but we have a lot of complicated, deep-rooted problems that are difficult to resolve. def enhanced by her kissing my crush right in front of me while drunk.
good news though: have kept a fast up except for zero kcal energy drinks for the past day and a half. i usually purge with ridiculous frequency when i'm upset, but right now i just feel absolutely no desire to eat ever again.
any similar experiences? just wanted to share xo
[Discussion] Moving in with boyfriend, tips to keep it relatively healthy?
/u/Cosmoflower [168cm | 152lbs| 24.43 | 19lbs | F]
Created: Wed Nov 2 15:47:30 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5assp0/moving_in_with_boyfriend_tips_to_keep_it/
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Hi everyone,
I'm about to move in with my boyfriend and in the mean time we will be living at his parents place for a few months, I'm super excited!
However, I've become used to living independently and because of this have been able to have a majority of control over my food supply and therefor my mental state in regard to food consumption.
Having control over my food means I am able to avoid a lot of mental grief and anxiety over eating, and not have to panic about hiding particular eating habits too much. But when I make this move I worry about people noticing I'm not eating or lying about eating for example, and it starting to skew their opinions of me or worry about me.
I am also worried that because when I am with my boyfriend I have a tendency to let myself get away with eating things or too much when I know will cause me severe mental problems later on which I've struggled to hide before, and have a tendency to take out on people when I don't know how to communicate properly. He's amazing and of course I have found my way of speaking to him about everything, but I don't want him to have to worry about it.
The thing is, I obviously will be able to bring my own food into the house and things but there will be a lot of food around and also cooked for me that won't be easy to avoid either.
I'm a bit worried I guess about starting a bad cycle of letting myself eat and then hating myself which I won't be able to stabilise, where as living alone I can sort of monitor it to stop myself from getting out of control mentally?
I guess in summary - I'm moving in with my boyfriend and his family, its going to be amazing and I'm looking forward to it, but I'm worried about how I'm going to cope mentally in regard to food and am trying to put a strategy in place for myself and I was wondering if anyone had any advice to give or experience to share in regard to this situation!
I just want to be able to start the next chapter of my life as best I can :)
Thanks friends.
[Help] Someone save me from myself.
/u/Navelpudding [5' 6" | 185 | F]
Created: Wed Nov 2 15:23:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5asnrl/someone_save_me_from_myself/
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I'm crying and stuffing my stupid face with candy. Someone tell at me to go for a walk please.
Alright I put pants on and I'm going to the park. Thanks guys.
[Goal] My Apple Watch (and Tubbs from Neko Atsume) is helping me stay on track!
/u/chrrie
Created: Wed Nov 2 15:22:25 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5asnjd/my_apple_watch_and_tubbs_from_neko_atsume_is/
---
http://imgur.com/a/AIc3V
[Rant/Rave] WTF appetite
/u/sincereenfuego [5'9" | 135 | 19.9 | ? | M]
Created: Wed Nov 2 15:04:34 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5asjt2/wtf_appetite/
---
Made it through Halloween without eating candy but come today, I go in the fridge for a bottle of water and see my roommates half eaten McDonalds hash brown. I don't know why but I ate the shit out of it. I mean seriously, who leave HALF a hash brown. I am secretly pissed at my room mate now.
[Rant/Rave] The fuq appetite?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Nov 2 14:54:02 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5ashjt/the_fuq_appetite/
---
[deleted]
[Goal] My Extended Fast: Day 1 Complete
/u/ForeverEmptyInside [5'9"| CW:115 lbs | BMI 17 | LW:104lbs | M]
Created: Wed Nov 2 14:49:34 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5asgnu/my_extended_fast_day_1_complete/
---
[previous post] (https://www.reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5ae0en/fasting_for_a_month/)
I enjoyed my last week of October,
I got drunk four times
I got high twice
And I even tripped once.
Why not have a little fun before I embark on this long spiral downwards?
Anyways, I completed the first 24 hours easily. I've done 7 & 10 day fasts before so I don't think it'll be an issue.
Not sure how often I'll do these posts either.. I'll try *not* to every day because that would spam the subreddit.
Sorry for the ramble, I don't have anyone else in my life who would listen to me about this.
[Intro] Intro
/u/sassafraskitten
Created: Wed Nov 2 14:26:45 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5asbwj/intro/
---
Hi, I thought I'd introduce myself. I'm a 24 year old lesbian living in Texas. I work as a mental health case manager and am working on my MS in clinical mental health counseling. I've had my ED since I was 9-10, due to complex childhood trauma. I've been in treatment a few times (most recently 6 months ago) and been in recovery for some chunks of time, but I've decided I'm not doing that anymore. Hating myself for eating is taking up way too much of my time. So I'm going back to old habits.
I also have hypothyroidism and some sort of autoimmune and neurological issues that cause severe chronic pain (currently being referred to multiple specialists to figure it out).
Also, I'm brand new to reddit, so there's a decent chance I'm doing something wrong. I can't figure out how to add flair/add my BMI or goal weight or anything.
[Rant/Rave] Chew and spit is ruining me.
/u/skullp00pl
Created: Wed Nov 2 14:04:10 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5as6zk/chew_and_spit_is_ruining_me/
---
I like the taste of food, I'd say most people do. Sometimes it can be hard to not want to just eat garbage, which is why I picked up the chew and spit habit.
My problem now is that I'm so used to spitting out things, that when I get to a certain texture after chewing food normally (with the intention of swallowing it), I have to force it down and stop myself from gagging. I've associated the texture with "abort, do not swallow" and now I've royally fucked myself.
Way to go, me.
[Rant/Rave] i went for a walk
/u/kennedyconnolly [5'9| 120 | 17.4]
Created: Wed Nov 2 14:01:17 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5as6bv/i_went_for_a_walk/
---
so. i walk a mile after practice everyday so that i can burn some extra calories before im forced to go home and eat. i do this secretly because ya know dont want anyone telling my parents!
my coach knows i have an ED but not much else.
so im walking down the street (that my coach lives on, i feel stupid now) and im lowkey freaking out because my dad is coming to pick me up and i dont know if i will finish the walk in time. so i decide to start jogging and all of a sudden my coach is THERE. RIGHT THERE.
shes like "what are you doing?"
"when i saw you i started running to you!"
"ohkay... who is picking you up.."
"my dad.... uh my therapist said i should take a walk after practice to free my mind"
"well okay it is a de stressor"
*awkward silence/laughing*
"well cya tomorrow coach!!"
"ok bye now"
IM FREAKING OUT. IDK IF SHES GONNA TELL AND IM SO SCARED TBH. SOOOO AWK.
[Tip] Seriously Helpful Apps
/u/antkings [GW 105 | BMI 20.4 | -79lbs | Male 20]
Created: Wed Nov 2 13:49:44 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5as3vv/seriously_helpful_apps/
---
I use [Argus ](https://imgur.com/gallery/gIMk4) which will calculate how many calories you burn from walking based off of your stats, and then applies them atop your bmr so you can see how many calories you ACTUALLY burned in a day. You can easily add exercises as well. You can quickly view and add your coffee, water, and calorie intake, as well as your macronutrients. Check out the photo in the link!
Anyone else have a seriously helpful app suggestion?
(mobile, no flair)
Having a bad week then I realize....
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Nov 2 13:12:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5arvw3/having_a_bad_week_then_i_realize/
---
http://imgur.com/a/q2VeK
[Help] need new incentive...
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Nov 2 12:29:45 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5armhm/need_new_incentive/
---
[removed]
[Discussion] Super Emotional Video about Binge Eating
/u/starfishwishez [5'11" | 220 | 32.5 | -3lbs | GW: 170]
Created: Wed Nov 2 11:46:21 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5arcz3/super_emotional_video_about_binge_eating/
---
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yWHIAQ84AZM
[Discussion] My boyfriend and I are doing the 10k kcal challenge on Saturday for our anniversary...
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Nov 2 11:16:19 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5ar6et/my_boyfriend_and_i_are_doing_the_10k_kcal/
---
[deleted]
[Discussion] ►candy◄
/u/eatdrinksmokegreen [5'4" | 133 lbs | 23.2 | -37 lbs | F]
Created: Wed Nov 2 10:59:04 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5ar2kp/candy/
---
So my house is full of candy right now. . . Basically fasting is impossible. . . I can ignore the hunger pains for days but sugar/candy cravings almost always break me. It's quite the viscous cycle. While I'm normally a restricter, I've had several binge/purge episodes over the past month (long before the introduction of halloween candy). . . I'm pretty much purging daily now regardless of if I binge or not. . . But anyway, back to the candy. . . It doesn't seem to come back up? Everything else I eat on a binge does. . . Just none of the little chocolate candies. . . That's impossible right? I just binged on 6 of them after eating some chicken and broccoli. . Eating the chicken and broccoli first so at least anything absorbed would be nutritious. . . BUT. . . That came back out just fine. . No candy. . What have I done??
[Other] Found this passage from my gender and sexuality textbook from last year. still messes with me a little
/u/ikillsouls [5' 2" | 104 | 19.0 | Ugw: 85 |19f]
Created: Wed Nov 2 10:17:59 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5aqtmj/found_this_passage_from_my_gender_and_sexuality/
---
https://i.redd.it/z8ky7jwue8vx.jpg
[Discussion] Anybody else have a Jawbone fitness tracker?
/u/TessTobias [5'5" | 120 | 19.7 | -22]
Created: Wed Nov 2 10:14:12 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5aqsrj/anybody_else_have_a_jawbone_fitness_tracker/
---
I bought a Jawbone UP move Fitness tracker from Target the other day because it was down from $50 to $15. It's just to hold me over until I can save up for a Fitbit but in the meantime I was wondering if anybody else has one because you can add friends on the app. You can even duel each other. I thought it would be a fun way to keep moving for no binge November!
[Rant/Rave] The new guy I'm dating has more discipline than me and I'm jealous lol
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Nov 2 10:08:55 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5aqrip/the_new_guy_im_dating_has_more_discipline_than_me/
---
[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] How to successfully spiral out of control. A time lapse. (Long)
/u/IdidntChooseThis [5'11.5" | CW: 116.0 GW: 114 UGW: 110 | 15.95 | 19F]
Created: Wed Nov 2 09:55:56 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5aqolz/how_to_successfully_spiral_out_of_control_a_time/
---
These past two weeks have been some of the worst weeks of my life.
Fourteen days ago my therapist (who works with me on suicidal ideation and trauma) convinced me (in a moment of weakness for me) that it was time I did an assessment to see what a treatment center could do for me.
Ten days ago I told my roommate about the appointment (she has prior history with this shit), and she told me that I didn't know half the beast I was dealing with.
Eight days ago, my therapist asks if she can tell my doctor of the appointment and that I am seeking treatment, another moment of weakness and I give permission, even though my paperwork for her says not to contact him.
Seven days ago I had my appointment and they recommended residential after paying a deductible (in the thousands), which I cannot afford at all. Also seven days ago, my roommate tells me that she is taking over my diet and that she will monitor everything that I eat and has guilted me into eating more and more. She took my food scale and my personal scale. She went through my reddit and my phone and deleted any thinspo or quotes. She probably knows this username but whatever.
Six days ago I had an appointment with my doctor (who also prescribes my hormones [trans mtf]), and after looking through the paperwork he decides that it's time for me to come off of estradiol (estrogen) after 13 months of being on it. He gives no explanation on what I have to do to receive it again, and I haven't been able to get in touch with him since.
Five days ago I started to hate myself more than usual. Especially while showering/changing.
Four days ago I started to have withdrawal symptoms. Whether from the increase in diet or the loss of estradiol, I don't know.
Three days ago, the random erections that accompany pubescent boys came back. I was getting dressed and a pair of flats turned me on. I'm scared it will happen again. That evening, I had a panic attack, the first one I'd had in over six months.
Two days ago I noticed how dry and red my face had become. I couldn't cleanse my face enough to get all the dead skin off. I use to always get compliments on how smooth my face was, and how they all wanted to know my skin care, it wasn't much and I always said it was good genetics and moisturizer
One day ago, a person in my class said that I didn't look like my usual, chipper self. My eyes have lost their brightness, and the dark circles show how little rest I've been able to have. My face is red and splotchy and my eyes were bloodshot from the stress.
This morning, my roommate weighed me. I gained 4 pounds. I also received my bloodwork and EKG results. I'm fine. No heart issues, no elevated blood pressure, no nothing. Everything was normal. They weighed me with a coat on so I weighed five extra pounds. They didn't need to know. I would still have my hormones if I just refused my therapist's request to tell my doctor
I was so close to being thin. I might have been cracking in private, but it was nothing like the break I've had now. I'm on the precipice of one bad situation after the next. I can't trust anyone and I don't feel safe in my home. I was so close to being pretty, and while I would never be the five foot four person that I want to be, I would at least be a size zero. I've been buying two's and it makes me so happy, my shirts are a size small everywhere I shop. I didn't have to try shirts on either, I could pick a small and it would be the correct size 8/10 times.
Not anymore, though. Gone are the days where I felt in control of my life. Gone are those moments of happiness when I hit a new low, when even half a pound made me feel thinner when I looked in the mirror. Now, I'm already getting fat. I'm already losing the progress that I made. I didn't want recovery. My ED kept me focused on my schoolwork, it slowed my spiral, it kept me sane, but now it has been taken away from me. I can't get anything done. I can't focus on my school. I turned in a paper that needed one more edit to be perfect my professor said, but instead, I got a B. I wanted that A. I worked hard on that paper. I just couldn't bring myself to get out of bed to work on it. I am all over the place. I forget where I am going and all of my dissociation symptoms are coming back. I feel physical pain. I can't find my advil.
I'm trapped. No one is on my side, I don't know who to trust, no one understands the demons that I have to fight and how this ED was my ally that gave me the strength to live my life. I control my life. It's my body, I can do what I want with it. If I want to mold it into something completely disgusting to you then that is my right to do so. I will be as pretty and thin as the other girls. Even if it kills me.
I'll be dead by the holidays. The last thing I can control is whether I live or die. It's almost time for my suffering to end.
Formatting edit.
[Discussion] [PSA] Some new rules and new mods!
/u/somanyjellyrolls [5'5" | 117.8 | 19.83 | F]
Created: Wed Nov 2 09:23:16 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5aqhq7/psa_some_new_rules_and_new_mods/
---
Hey everyone! The mods have been chatting, and we definitely feel your frustration with low-effort posts and people treating this sub as a "lose-it lite" instead of a safe space for those with eating disorders.
From today onward, we'll be reverting back to only posting selfies in the Friday Selfie, Progress Pics, and OOTD thread. In addition, all memes and funny threads/pictures will be relegated to "Meme Sundays." Hopefully this will clear up the front page for more active discussions and providing help to those who need it. We all enjoy those types of posts, but there have been far too many lately, and it is diluting the content of the sub. Please save them for their respective days!
Also, we have two new mods from across the pond! /u/woollyshirt joined us a couple weeks ago, and /u/smokesanddietcokes joined today! They both have contributed so much to this sub, and we know they'll do a great job moderating while those of us in the colonies are sleeping ;) Please give them a warm welcome!
[Rant/Rave] sorry, mom
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Nov 2 09:03:27 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5aqdgh/sorry_mom/
---
[deleted]
[Discussion] Are laxatives really that dangerous?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Nov 2 08:28:13 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5aq6f3/are_laxatives_really_that_dangerous/
---
[deleted]
[Discussion] Does anyone here shop at Costco?
/u/descendingscales [5'7 | 160 | 25.1 | -50lbs | F]
Created: Wed Nov 2 08:12:37 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5aq397/does_anyone_here_shop_at_costco/
---
My boyfriend works at Costco and has been wanting me to come by and visit while he's at work. I literally just got a membership and I don't want it to go to waste completely, but the idea of buying anything in bulk is making me very anxious. Are there any low-cal staples anyone can suggest that I can buy while there?
[Discussion] How often do you weigh yourself?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Nov 2 07:58:59 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5aq0k3/how_often_do_you_weigh_yourself/
---
On mobile; can't flair!
I weigh myself every morning, first thing.
Also, how much of a weight difference do you look for? If I don't lose a pound each day, I tend to hate myself more. Like this morning, I was only down .4 pounds, and I'm hating on myself big time for what I ate yesterday.
On the upside, I lost 14 pounds in the month of October! Shooting for 20 lbs lost in November :)
[Rant/Rave] Peace, Love and Little Donuts Opening in Town
/u/starfishwishez [5'11" | 220 | 32.5 | -3lbs | GW: 170]
Created: Wed Nov 2 07:58:15 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5aq0f5/peace_love_and_little_donuts_opening_in_town/
---
So, I go to school in Huntington, WV and I just got an email that a new shop called, "Peace, Love and Little Donuts," is opening in the town square. Like... of course we fucking do. Huntington is like the 3rd highest in obesity. And they're equating feeling peaceful and feeling love, with fucking donuts. We already have a cupcake store, ice creameries, bars, and greasy spoon restaurants. Why can't we have something actually healthy? Instead, we got this stupid junk food place that encourages emotional eating.
[Tip] Good morning, lovelies! I thought I'd share my new favorite breakfast. On the same level as halo top imo.
/u/dbishop22
Created: Wed Nov 2 06:16:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5apizs/good_morning_lovelies_i_thought_id_share_my_new/
---
https://imgur.com/a/1qcFs
[Sticky] Way To Go Wednesday November 02, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Wed Nov 2 06:09:24 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5aphso/way_to_go_wednesday_november_02_2016/
---
This is the weekly achievement thread for November 02, 2016.
This weekly thread is to spotlight those achievements you feel don't necessarily warrant their own post, but you'd like to celebrate all the same. This is not limited to specifically ED-related goals; share anything you are happy about having done or accomplished recently!
*****
Achievement threads are posted every Wednesday.
Have any questions or concerns? Comment below, or [PM the mods.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FproED)
[Sticky] Daily Food Diary! November 02, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Wed Nov 2 06:09:16 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5aphrq/daily_food_diary_november_02_2016/
---
This is a daily food diary thread for November 02, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
[Other] its been a messy past couple of days but I'm gonna get back into things
/u/leatherhoff [5"3 | 130 | ftm (not on hrt yet)]
Created: Wed Nov 2 04:24:43 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5ap4ez/its_been_a_messy_past_couple_of_days_but_im_gonna/
---
i was doing alright last week, until the weekend. Binged a lot. Halloween rolls around, I plan to fast, what happens instead? I get drunk and get Chinese food. Yesterday I was still at a friends house, his mum made us food which I had to eat out of obligation, went home and cooked myself a big stir fry and then binged on leftover Halloween sweets for the rest of the day. Today I'm still feeling off, it usually takes me a couple days to come down after binges, but I'm aiming to get back on track asap. I'm gonna have lunch at work today as one last high cal thing then I'm gonna fast for the rest of the day, or at least restrict if I have to eat, then starting tomorrow I'm gonna get back into my sub-400 cals/day or fasting routine. I don't care if anyone thinks I need to eat more - I feel so much better about myself when I'm losing weight and barely eating and I don't think people realise just how disgusting I am so they tell me I don't need to starve. But hey newsflash, I do, and I'm gonna get back into it from later today onwards. Gonna be slim and pretty by my 18th, got one month left to do it now so I need to clamp down. I got this
edit: WELL FUCK GUESS WHO BINGED AGAIN
[Rant/Rave] literally cannot stand when
/u/gin-and-lemon [🐝 5'1"| cw: 150lbs | bmi: 29 | -15lbs | f]
Created: Wed Nov 2 03:48:53 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5ap0hj/literally_cannot_stand_when/
---
people are like "oh i eat 1100-1300 cals a day!! why am i not losing weight!!"
look here look me in the eyes
do u track ALL OF YOUR CALORIES?
DRINKS COUNT
SNACKS COUNT
THAT TINY THING U ATE OFF SOMEONE ELSES PLATE
IT COUNTS
BOOZE EXTRA COUNTS (DONT PRETEND IT DOESN'T HAVE CALORIES LIFE ISNT THAT KIND)
***screaming intensifies***
^im ^sorry ^that ^most ^of ^my ^posts ^are ^damn ^near ^shitposts
[Goal] Anyone want to join me in a binge free week? Day 3
/u/goodvibeswanted2
Created: Wed Nov 2 02:44:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5aottu/anyone_want_to_join_me_in_a_binge_free_week_day_3/
---
Yesterday I faltered, but today is a new day. I overate yesterday. I racked up over 2400 calories. Obviously I'm disappointed. It could have been a lot worse, and I'm thankful it wasn't. I'm thinking of fasting for part of the day today to try and make up some of the calories. Tonight I'm going to a wing place for trivia night. I'm not sure if I'll eat there. Maybe I should eat something before I go so I don't go too crazy, especially if I manage to skip lunch.
I hope my weaknesses don't discourage or derail anyone here.
[Goal] Finding the confidence to wear body con dresses in public for the first time
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Nov 1 23:52:21 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5aobr8/finding_the_confidence_to_wear_body_con_dresses/
---
https://i.reddituploads.com/ed11fc6d5b4e446087c153d4ee2285e8?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=8407bf905ae42cf4918d3f5c0bda4283
You know you did good today when you see this on MFP
/u/nyopq [5'11 | 174.0 | 24.3 | GW: 115 | M]
Created: Tue Nov 1 23:24:43 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5ao8bv/you_know_you_did_good_today_when_you_see_this_on/
---
http://imgur.com/vKQht9w
[Help] joints
/u/jrste310 [5 ft | 106 lb | 21.34 | -21.5| Female]
Created: Tue Nov 1 22:32:18 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5ao19a/joints/
---
today i literally felt so achey like all my joints were in so much pain- has this ever happened to anyone/ what vitamins can counteract this?
medications with weight gain side effects
/u/jackaljones
Created: Tue Nov 1 21:44:56 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5antxr/medications_with_weight_gain_side_effects/
---
[removed]
[Discussion] Has anyone ever worked at a job that triggered self esteem issues/body dysmorphia/ed?
/u/dooksofireland
Created: Tue Nov 1 20:52:13 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5anl1c/has_anyone_ever_worked_at_a_job_that_triggered/
---
I feel like my issues with my body came along when I stupidly decided to work at Hooters for a year when I turned 18, at the time I thought it would make me more confident but in hindsight it was horrible for me. I was so self aware because of the men, comparing myself to the other girls, and obviously the tight as hell uniform...my boss at the time who weighed 450 lbs i shit you not told me i wasnt thin enough to wear a crop top..ill never forget that lol even though I was purging alot at this time..
just wondering if anyone else has been influenced by a job like this before...
[Rant/Rave] Well I still have an eating disorder
/u/notyourtoy [5'8" | 126 lbs | 18.95 BMI | -37 lbs | F]
Created: Tue Nov 1 20:35:07 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5ani5y/well_i_still_have_an_eating_disorder/
---
I thought I was recovering. In fact, I've been determined to recover and I've talked about it here before. Lifting weights, counting macros, trying to be ok with not losing every day. But I'm not eating enough. I've slipped into intermittent fasting just because it makes the scale go down. I feel dizzy and tired all the time and I'm barely struggling through my workouts (which I still doggedly do four times a week). My strength is going up in the gym and my weight is holding (mostly) steady,but I know I'm not feeding myself like I should. My body dysmorphia is through the roof and I'm constantly anxious about calories. Lately I've added excruciatingly painful hunger pangs to the mix, which make it hard to solve the problem by eating more like my brain is telling me I have to.
I'm taking body check photos almost daily and studying them throughout the day to determine if I'm "ok" or not. I really can't tell. Am I still fat? Am I still that chunky girl I feel like I always am? I know I'm nothing like dangerously thin, not a single person is worried about me when they look at me. But I feel sick, so I must be. Right? I don't even know.
I just can't get better. It's impossible. I'm going to die slowly of this fucking monster my mother gave me.
[Discussion] Can I be my own thinspo?
/u/TitsWithRoses [5'3" | CW:160 |-21 | GW:107]
Created: Tue Nov 1 19:51:20 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5anadj/can_i_be_my_own_thinspo/
---
http://imgur.com/a/sfSN6
[Goal] confession: part of me does it for the knee socks
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Nov 1 19:42:42 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5an8si/confession_part_of_me_does_it_for_the_knee_socks/
---
https://i.reddituploads.com/fa478788259a4008821ae12fad19bfb1?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=8d4124f4de9fb51fcfd43c1d779084f3
[Rant/Rave] Sick and filled with regret
/u/alliknowis___
Created: Tue Nov 1 19:36:07 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5an7lk/sick_and_filled_with_regret/
---
It's midterms. I have a horrible cold. So today I woke up and said fuck it! I walked into my local grocery and bought the value pack of chocolate chip cookies (2 lbs). I looked awesome Halloween, aced my classes so far, I deserve this.
Today has been such a haze. Filled with smoking weed to fall asleep, sleeping most of the day away, and absent-mindedly stuffing cookies down my gullet because I'm sick and my family are states away so no one can take care of me and make me chicken soup =[ granted I'm used to this and am almost 30 but whenever I'm sick I always want my mommy.
Finally I'm wide awake with clarity and a stuffed nose that refuses conventional remedies and I start to process the damage I've done to any progress. My stomach is turning so I look up a calorie estimate...I ate almost 4000 calories (there's still cookies left). That's just crazy talk! If I knew I was going to do that I would've ordered a pizza pie and have frozen most of it so it'd be harder to binge.
I've tried purging and my throat is too sore from this cold for that to be bearable. I know I should drink lots of water, it's just one day, etc. But it sickens me that I was capable of such a thing and I want all of this out of my belly asap. Halp.
[Rant/Rave] My Parents and my ED
/u/smallpaint [6'2" | 170lb | M]
Created: Tue Nov 1 19:22:02 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5an52a/my_parents_and_my_ed/
---
They have no earthly idea what's going on, besides a general sense of alarm. And I really try to empathize with their perspective on the whole thing-- I'm really not romanticizing or indulging my ED any more than I have to.
But I just broke a two day fast and ended up binging. So, obviously, it's today that they ask me if I've "been losing weight again." Today, when my face is puffy and my hips have sunk back beneath a sea of fat.
Today. Not the 48 hours that I didn't eat a single thing, *today.*
It just makes me want to scream-- it's the unintentional, bumbling equivalent of a catty coworker / classmate saying, just as you cut a slice of binge cake, "Your diet looks like it's going well."
[Rant/Rave] Not doing well. Have no one to tell. [Vent]
/u/invisible_lizz [5' | 107.8 | BMI:21 l GW 90| -36.2 l F]
Created: Tue Nov 1 18:08:31 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5amr7v/not_doing_well_have_no_one_to_tell_vent/
---
I don't even know where to start. I'm a mess. My life is a mess. My apartment is a mess. My mind is beyond a mess.
I've been unemployed for about 2 months now. SO was very kind and understanding in the beginning. Now it's causing a strain with our finances because I can't contribute to rent this month. And he's lovely, he really is, but I feel like such a failure.
I imagine in my head that one day he's going to come home and finally snap and get angry that I'm a piece of shit. I can't bring myself to do anything but restrict and feel like shit. I wake up too late. I can't even take my meds on time. I go nowhere. I went out today but the only thing I could think about was going home the whole time. But someone else was driving and I couldn't escape the situation for hours. They drove us to chick fil-a and kept trying to get me to eat a chicken sandwich when I kept fucking telling them that I'm a pescatarian.
Last night I hit a new low because I'm so fucking lonely. I had been mostly self-harm free for almost 2 years, but I broke that last night. I have no friends that I can talk to about my food issues because no one would understand. I don't want to go to my therapist anymore. It's been almost 9 years that I've been in therapy and I'm just getting worse. I feel like it's just a character flaw at this point. I'll always be this way.
I've even lost my appetite completely at this point. I don't even care.
TLDR: I suck at life.
[Tip] Riced Cauliflower is amazing
/u/morose_adipose [5'2 | 90 lbs | 17.05 | F]
Created: Tue Nov 1 18:01:20 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5ampsa/riced_cauliflower_is_amazing/
---
After my carb filled weekend, I have been in horrible gastric distress. I apparently can't process sugar very well anymore. (yay...maybe that'll keep my dumbass from binging on cupcakes and ice cream ever again!) Last night for dinner, I knew I had to eat something super low carb and bland. I had a bag of the Green Giant Riced Cauliflower in my freezer, and so I figured what the hell. I just put salt and pepper on it and holy shit, seriously amazing. Only 2g net carbs and 20 calories per serving, or 8g net carbs and 80 calories for the entire package. It is super filling too. This is going to be my new go-to for dinner. Tonight I'm having it again with lemon pepper and a piece of grilled chicken breast. Freakin' amazing.
Just though I'd share!
[Rant/Rave] The struggle. Rant.
/u/melindasordino
Created: Tue Nov 1 17:55:07 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5amoj2/the_struggle_rant/
---
Cant flair; on mobile. But this classifies as a rant.
Also, heads up, I used to be mildly active on here as u/presidentkennady. Im not new, just back! Hi!
On to the rant...
Does this ever end? I know i want to get better. I know i want to be healthy! But the execution is almost impossible. And I can reasonably separate my 'ed brain' from the 'logical brain', but that doesnt exactly rid the former of its power. If anything, understanding that what Im doing, why, and why i shouldnt be doing it only exacerbates the problem, creates more anxiety and self hatred. And thus continues the cycle.
Anyone relate? Rant with me. This is exhausting.
I made this for my fiancé & I can't believe I didn't touch it. ~fast on~
/u/tattoosandcoffeee [5'4 | GW 108 | -12]
Created: Tue Nov 1 17:22:11 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5ami7m/i_made_this_for_my_fiancé_i_cant_believe_i_didnt/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/9cc3e5a6e0ab4ea8aac704dc933aaa86?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=e7a8e99c730818cf733c1d6a4bc642ef
[Intro] Just saying hi.
/u/boneybabybitch [5'4" | GW birthweight | BMI 16.3 | F]
Created: Tue Nov 1 17:16:49 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5amh5l/just_saying_hi/
---
Hi everybody. I've lurked here for a while, and decided to make a new username to participate.
I have dealt with my eating issues since 13. I went into forced recovery at 17, and only felt worse after. I am now in my late 20s, feeling like I am the fattest and most out of control that I've ever been, and feeling like I have no one to talk to about it.
I am happy to have found this forum to be able to vent with all of you. I look forward to getting to know you.
[Discussion] opinions on reverse thinspo?
/u/lllbt
Created: Tue Nov 1 17:15:23 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5amgve/opinions_on_reverse_thinspo/
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So I used to look at reverse thinspo when I was feeling like shit and wanted to binge. But I stopped looking at it because it really supports fat shaming which I realllly don't like. Yes, I hate my body, but to hate other peoples bodies because they are larger isn't fair. I would never wish upon anyone to develop an eating disorder because we all know its LIVING HELL. I can't imagine how awful I would feel if I found out someone was using pictures of my body as reverse thinspo. This is toxic and further perpetuates how fucked up our society is on how we view bodies. I don't know, this is definitely a rant at this point. I guess I just feel guilty for having used reverse thinspo
[Help] Stupid question, but could anyone help with some simple ish maths for how fast I was walking?
/u/ADayToRememberFYes
Created: Tue Nov 1 16:44:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5amaox/stupid_question_but_could_anyone_help_with_some/
---
Okay, so I read the new start November posts, and I was like shit, yeah, I should do this properly before Christmas, so I reinstalled MFP (again) and logged in today's meals, and went to add in my walk back from college, but I need to know how fast I walked, and I'm pretty certain it's fairly simple maths, but my brain is just not working today!
Okay, so I went 2 miles, and it took 35 minutes, so that's 17.5 minutes per mile, but how do I switch that to miles per hour?
If anyone could help I'd be super thankful! :)
Side note - can you no longer chose your own daily calorie goal now? Or am I just being stupid again and missing something obvious?
2nd side note- I logged in and saw last year I was 66kg at a similar time, holy shit, I didn't realise I had weighed that much, I thought I was reasonably skinny then! Like I know it's not obese, it just shocked me compared to now, and how much I had put on/lost.
Sorry for the rambles, but thank you in advance! 😊
Edit- thank you everyone! Better maths skills than me 😭😂 Also, turns out I'm eating waay more calories than I thought, and not burning off enough, hopefully this will give me a better idea now...
[Discussion] DAE have a body part pet peeve?
/u/SoFetchBetch [5'8 F CW:115 GW:105 LW:107 HW:138 WL:24]
Created: Tue Nov 1 16:37:03 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5am92r/dae_have_a_body_part_pet_peeve/
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Not intending to be negative here just wondering if anyone else shares this feeling. I hate hate hate the feeling of my boobs touching my ribcage and when I'm at my lower weight they shrink up more and I don't get that feeling as much. Right now I'm on the higher side and I just never wanna take my bra off lol.
Also chin and hips. Arg.
Anyone else have a pet peeve body thing?
[Help] Is Monster Zero Calorie ACTUALLY Zero Calorie? Because it's an amazing appetite suppressant.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Nov 1 16:26:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5am73w/is_monster_zero_calorie_actually_zero_calorie/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] Rant (sorry on mobile so I can't flair)
/u/borrow_our_light [5'7| 142 | 22.9 | -21lbs | F | GW 115]
Created: Tue Nov 1 15:58:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5am14o/rant_sorry_on_mobile_so_i_cant_flair/
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I've been restricting heavily and fasting regularly this month but have seen little to no change, and my scale is telling me that as well. Am I just holding onto water weight. I'm not sure what's happening, I was loosing more weight just by restricting.
[Thinspo] My small kpop thinspo album
/u/jiuel1 [5'4"(barely yay) | 122.6 | 20.9 | -12 lbs | F]
Created: Tue Nov 1 15:45:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5alyhd/my_small_kpop_thinspo_album/
---
https://imgur.com/a/MecOv
[Other] Group chat
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Nov 1 15:35:37 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5alwh5/group_chat/
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[deleted]
[Discussion] New month, new goals.
/u/capture_the_excite
Created: Tue Nov 1 15:15:48 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5alsch/new_month_new_goals/
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I've always viewed the coming of a new month as a chance to review things. Sometimes things look good, but often they don't - last month I really got into purging again, which I've been trying to eliminate (two weeks purge-free, yay!).
I was wondering if any of you have goals for November? I have two - I want to continue this no-purging streak, and I want to visit the gym a total of ten times. I've set the bar pretty low and I think it's doable.
They don't necessarily have to be ED related, but I'd love to hear your November goals!
[Other] So a while back I asked about pixie cuts and I finally did it!
/u/starry_daydreamer [4'11" | 93 lbs | 19.95 | F]
Created: Tue Nov 1 14:55:05 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5alnyo/so_a_while_back_i_asked_about_pixie_cuts_and_i/
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http://i.imgur.com/q9Uhi7S.jpg
[Meme/Humor] Me when I finally break my fast
/u/Alkylhalides [Height | CW | BMI | Weight Lost | Gender]
Created: Tue Nov 1 13:48:04 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5al940/me_when_i_finally_break_my_fast/
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http://i.imgur.com/QfgLKmJ.gifv
[Help] Can't even get out of bed anymore help :(
/u/feelingpeakyy [5'3 | 95lbs | 16.7 | F]
Created: Tue Nov 1 13:42:45 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5al7z7/cant_even_get_out_of_bed_anymore_help/
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I'm not at that low weight.. i've been MUCH lower before. But I've been on very low calories for about a month now, generally doing somewhere between 0-400 per day.
I've gotten to the point where I can't get out of bed much. If i have to go outside I'm exhausted. Walking makes my heart pound and I'm out of breath.
Today my chest felt so weird and I couldn't stay awake anymore, and i Had this feeling like I might not wake up from my billionth nap of the day. I live completely alone so no one is here to check on me.
Why am i this weak at a BMI in the 16s - i usually don't feel like this until my BMI is more in the 14s? :( could it be that I've done this one too many times?
[Help] No results and super bummed. Any ideas?
/u/demonofequality [5'5"| CW: 130 | GW: 115 | 21.89 | -20 lbs| F]
Created: Tue Nov 1 13:39:45 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5al7bp/no_results_and_super_bummed_any_ideas/
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[removed]
Fasting and working?
/u/charpiercy1
Created: Tue Nov 1 13:36:51 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5al6ps/fasting_and_working/
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[removed]
[Discussion] So Zayn Malik apparently struggled with a eating disorder.
/u/Melusedek [173 | CW: 64.1 | GW: < 57 | 21.42/21.17 | F ]
Created: Tue Nov 1 13:35:37 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5al6fl/so_zayn_malik_apparently_struggled_with_a_eating/
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https://www.buzzfeed.com/eleanorbate/zayn-has-revealed-he-dealt-with-an-eating-disorder?utm_term=.glveNkZgl#.wrBbBYPxe
[Discussion] i need support. please.
/u/notlivinghonestly
Created: Tue Nov 1 13:24:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5al3tc/i_need_support_please/
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[removed]
[Other] Would anyone be interested in starting a kik group?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Nov 1 13:23:41 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5al3pk/would_anyone_be_interested_in_starting_a_kik_group/
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[removed]
[Rant/Rave] Paranoid trash-can weirdo at work.
/u/gastastic [5'1 | 118.0 | 26F]
Created: Tue Nov 1 12:56:45 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5akxtq/paranoid_trashcan_weirdo_at_work/
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For Halloween, my coworker brought in cupcakes. It wasn't even 9AM, and I grabbed one. Only ate half-ish. Fast forward to 2PM and I was logging my cupcake in MFP and I started to doubt whether I really only had half. So I dug to the bottom of my waste bin (small one just at my desk), but my damn nosy coworker, whom I've mentioned here before, came up just as I was finishing.
She asked what I was doing and I just straight up told her to see how much of it I actually ate.
She quips, "you know, Gastastic, food is required for sustenance!" And I'm like, "yup". I'm not even that tiny. Like, be worried in however many pounds from now, but not NOW.
But anyways. That's what I get for being paranoid.
What's great about november:
/u/knobbje
Created: Tue Nov 1 12:05:24 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5akmrx/whats_great_about_november/
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[removed]
Anyone here willing to join me in this challenge? It seems quite possible tho!
/u/knobbje
Created: Tue Nov 1 12:03:29 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5akmc9/anyone_here_willing_to_join_me_in_this_challenge/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/cd2469e8674d4454b059ccf31178fb2b?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=d93ed5d6ae296c5d9350796f1ae08e01
[Rant/Rave] I hate halloween
/u/knobbje
Created: Tue Nov 1 12:02:25 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5akm3g/i_hate_halloween/
---
I hate myself for being expected to love sweets. I hate Halloween for being such an unhealthy holiday. I hate myself for having no time to burn the calories. I hate Halloween for having to hide those calories afterwards.
At least I'm starting a new eating plan tomorrow..
[Discussion] DAE base their perception of their body entirely on the number on the scale?
/u/peony_princess
Created: Tue Nov 1 11:58:03 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5akl5b/dae_base_their_perception_of_their_body_entirely/
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I think I just realized that I have no idea what I actually look like...
I didn't weigh myself all weekend because my sister was staying with me (my scale is in the back of my closet with a bunch of sticky notes of weight numbers above it that I rip off the wall when I pass that weight. I didn't want her to find my weird shrine to obsessive weight loss so I just didn't go in there). Yesterday when I went to weigh myself I accidentally fucked up the calibration of my scale while moving it and didn't realize it. I weighed in at about 9 pounds higher than I had been before the weekend. Then I looked in the mirror and I could SEE it. I could see 9 extra pounds on my hips and my legs and I just felt so fat and disgusting and like I had somehow undone all progress I've ever made in my life in three days.
I weighed myself again at night after resetting the zero on the scale and I was back down to normal. And now I look in the mirror and, while I still feel unsatisfied with what I see, I don't see nine extra pounds anymore?
Do any of you guys have similar issues? I feel like it's weird that I couldn't tell that I hadn't actually gained nine pounds...
[Discussion] (discussion) Why collarbones?
/u/dudeswallow
Created: Tue Nov 1 11:46:15 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5akiol/discussion_why_collarbones/
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[removed]
[Discussion] Headaches while fasting
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Nov 1 11:43:30 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5aki3f/headaches_while_fasting/
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How do you deal with them? Mine are mind splitting.
[Rant/Rave] An accurate representation of my first term in college.
/u/Korraaa [5'6 | CW: *cries* GW: 110 |]
Created: Tue Nov 1 11:35:37 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5akgft/an_accurate_representation_of_my_first_term_in/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/634f5eb7a5ae431081d2159c2a712d8d?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=4312aeefc0cefe586dcdabc2f884f357
[Rant/Rave] Had a few months of binge, back on track, but feeling defeated. [rant]
/u/chicklet2011 [5'6" | 152# | 26% | -38# | F]
Created: Tue Nov 1 11:30:30 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5akfbu/had_a_few_months_of_binge_back_on_track_but/
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On mobile, no flair.
I used a healthy diet to go from 189lbs to 160lbs. Then an unhealthy level of restriction to get to 147, which looked pretty good on my 5'6" frame. Not where I wanted to be, but I was okay with myself. Short backslide to 155lbs for about 6 months, then I tried an antianxiety medicine that had increased appetite as a side effect, and I lost control, and gained 20 lbs in a month.
Now I'm 175lbs again. I hate myself. UGW is something like 127. I have to lose 50lbs again. I worked so hard to lose 50 the first time, I'm just so tired of this.
Yesterday I did well, but my body is no longer used to going without food. I love the empty clean feeling of hunger, but I get dizzy and jittery and lose focus, and this is not the time in the school semester for this. Today I'm running on black coffee, sf redbull, and an apple, and I feel that lovely empty clean feeling, but I'm grinding my teeth so badly because of the jitters.
I'm feeling defeated, but I have work to do, and I just have to get better at it.
[Discussion] [Discussion] Need your best bouillon recipes!
/u/mace__face [5'6 | CW:112 | BMI:18.08 | GW:108 | F -16lbs]
Created: Tue Nov 1 10:45:33 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5ak5jd/discussion_need_your_best_bouillon_recipes/
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So I just started using bouillon cubes (I'm way late I know) and they're amazing! It's starting to get cold here so I made some chicken broth with garlic and thyme which was wonderful and homey.
So lovelies hit me with your go-to bouillon recipes!
[Help] qqquestions
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Nov 1 10:04:04 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5ajwhk/qqquestions/
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[removed]
[Rant/Rave] I'm so hungry
/u/pinotblanc [5'3 | GW:115 | -16 | F]
Created: Tue Nov 1 09:51:27 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5ajtqu/im_so_hungry/
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I'm starving. I've had 2 cups of tea and 750mL of water. I'm still hungry. All I can think about is food. I wanted to fast today but I don't think I can make it. I am so hungry!
[Goal] No-Cheat November! Who's with me?
/u/married_to_a_reddito
Created: Tue Nov 1 09:50:13 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5ajtie/nocheat_november_whos_with_me/
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Okay people, whether you're restricting, in recovery, or trying to maintain, this is a month to build willpower before the craziness of December sets in. Who's is ready to make November a cheating free month? Hmmm?
I think December comes with so much temptation with all the candies, parties, baked goods, etc. so why not enter with an iron will? We can all do this together! Let's OWN November and then tell December who's boss!
Comment by stating what your rules for yourself are. Remember to be simple and be kind. Don't make an impossible plan for yourself to follow. Start with a reasonable goal and go from there.
You can do it!
[Thinspo] anime characters
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Nov 1 09:37:07 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5ajqq8/anime_characters/
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does anyone else use anime characters as thinspo? I know this is super weird, but one of my ultimate goals is to look like a cute anime girl. people have told me I look like one/ have big eyes like an anime character, but I need a tiny body to match.....lol 😂
[Discussion] No-Binge November Day One
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Nov 1 09:02:48 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5ajjm2/nobinge_november_day_one/
---
[deleted]
Computer Science (off topic)
/u/smallpaint [6'2" | 170lb | M]
Created: Tue Nov 1 07:59:04 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5aj774/computer_science_off_topic/
---
[removed]
[Help] Halloween Candy Nutritional Info Dump
/u/WeighingDown [5'2" | 108 | 20.46 | F]
Created: Tue Nov 1 07:52:13 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5aj5xc/halloween_candy_nutritional_info_dump/
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Halloween was stressful and so are all the lingering candies and chocolates we might encounter these next few weeks.
Since some of us may have some stray goodies without the box that has the nutritional values, maybe we can share the nutritional values for Halloween/mini sized candies that we DO know so we can use this as a reference. I'll add some below.
[Meme/Humor] Story of my life
/u/LazyFawn [165 cm | 54.4 kg | 19.98 cuz im petty | 18 f]
Created: Tue Nov 1 07:47:27 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5aj51d/story_of_my_life/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/30d02c65a7814ae7a0592fd0ca24675d?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=e0aeef261789a27a361f1d4f36d698b6
[Goal] Starting Nov 1st with a fast & the right mindset
/u/tattoosandcoffeee [5'4 | GW 108 | -12]
Created: Tue Nov 1 07:43:41 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5aj4bx/starting_nov_1st_with_a_fast_the_right_mindset/
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[removed]
[Meme/Humor] When you've been struggling to lose then suddenly drop 3 lbs overnight...
/u/fairyspice [5'3" | 112 | 19.8 | GW 105 | F]
Created: Tue Nov 1 07:32:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5aj2f5/when_youve_been_struggling_to_lose_then_suddenly/
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http://imgur.com/xymXUCk
[Sticky] Self-care and Beauty Q+A November 01, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Tue Nov 1 06:10:41 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5aionb/selfcare_and_beauty_qa_november_01_2016/
---
Eating disorders are real, complex, and devastating conditions that can have serious consequences for physical health. Use this thread to discuss harm reduction and beauty tips, plus suggestions on how to build back up the physical self before and after engaging in disordered behaviors.
Please be wary of false advice and information. Be sure to research the facts before taking anyone's advice, no matter who they are. Remember that diagnosing members is unacceptable. **Anyone looking for medical guidance should seek the opinion of a medically licensed professional.**
*****
Self-care and beauty threads are posted every Tuesday.
Have any questions or concerns? Comment below, or [PM the mods.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FproED)
[Sticky] Daily Food Diary! November 01, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Tue Nov 1 06:10:33 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5aioms/daily_food_diary_november_01_2016/
---
This is a daily food diary thread for November 01, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
[Rant/Rave] Bronkaid mix-up . I'm so duuuumb!!
/u/Phantomsgf [5'2" | 144lbs | GW:125 | -16 lbs |F]
Created: Tue Nov 1 05:48:16 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5ailcp/bronkaid_mixup_im_so_duuuumb/
---
So I went to buy bronkaid for the first time in order to try EC stacks. I've never bought it before and I'm in a country where I don't speak the native language very fluently, but the pharmacist understands English.
So I ask if they have it, he says yes, the price is not too bad, so I bought it. I was so excited that I didn't bother to stop and read the label to confirm it actually had ephedrine/ephedra in it. (also I thought it would all be written in the other language I still don't fully understand)
As I get back to the car I pull out the box and start reading.
The second ingredient written in there is Eucalyptus... which I am deadly allergic to. Awesome.
To top it off it doesn't even contain Ephedra/Ephedrine.
So I just spent money on something completely useless which I can't even take when I actually do get a cold. I'm such an idiot.
At least now my SO has a new medicine for when he's sick I guess...?
[Tip] Welcome to November.
/u/aerienne [5'5" | 142.6 | F]
Created: Tue Nov 1 05:47:19 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5ail8r/welcome_to_november/
---
Do you know the great thing about November? It has no memory of October. If you asked November what happened last night, it couldn't tell you a single thing. If you cried on his shoulder and told him how much you overate at the end of October, November would just shrug. Typical November, only cares about himself (and ensuring Christmas decorations go up after Thanksgiving). He doesn't even care about December.
You have 30 days ahead of you. That's it. We're thinking short term. What can you do in those 30 days? Live in the now. Make all your actions support your goals. And take your vitamins. Always do that and drink plenty of water. Come on, we know this.
Point is, use November wisely. Close your eyes and pretend it's December 31st. That's 2 months from now. What will you be wishing you accomplished in two months? Why not think of all your New Year Resolutions and get a jump start on some? Even one.
I hope all of your have a wonderful November. Some of us will be stressing about Thanksgiving pretty soon, but it's just one day. Don't worry about it the whole month. We've got this. Just work towards your goals, keep them in mind, and be safe.
[Rant/Rave] Having a hard time dealing with extreme hunger
/u/InSkyLimitEra [5' 7.25" | CW 112.5 | HW 180 | LW 110 | 29 F]
Created: Tue Nov 1 00:31:05 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5aho5i/having_a_hard_time_dealing_with_extreme_hunger/
---
Hey folks.
First off, thanks for continuing to support me through all my eating issues. I know people on the outside have a hard time seeing past the name of the sub to what it does for us, but you're exactly what I need right now. Thank you.
Anyway, I recently decided to try to maintain or very slowly lose because I have to see my family at Thanksgiving who, doubtless, would notice I've lost a ton of weight and freak out. So for the past couple weeks, I've upped my calorie intake to an average of like 1350/day across a week, which previously would have allowed me to continue losing but not very quickly.
Well, over the past several weeks, I've watched my appetite grow to levels I didn't even know existed. It's not so much that the hunger is constant or that the hunger never goes away. But every single time I feel hungry, the hunger can only be described as absolutely *extreme*. On occasion, it has been so bad that I have thrown open my junk food cabinet and just started ravenously consuming whatever I can most quickly get my hands on, and it literally feels like I don't have control of my own actions. The drive to eat is that intense.
I just got out of bed to binge on nearly 1,000 calories, and each Monday is the beginning of a new "calorie week," so unlike the past two weeks, I already feel like I've fucked up horribly. I don't know what to do. My intention was not to gain weight, but I think my body believes I'm trying to recover now and it's making me eat like I am. I don't want that :-/ This is making me feel really anxious and terrible about myself. I don't want to show my face in public because I'm sure I'm gaining. I can't even bring myself to step on the scale.
Can anyone talk about their experiences with similar extreme hunger? I guess I'm just feeling like a fake and a failure and need support from people who have similar issues. I just want to get back to restricting, but I'm not sure how to simply turn off this massive surge in appetite. I hate it. The intensity of this hunger is beyond intolerable.
[Discussion] Anyone want to join me in a binge free week? Day 2
/u/goodvibeswanted2
Created: Mon Oct 31 23:48:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5ahjht/anyone_want_to_join_me_in_a_binge_free_week_day_2/
---
How are you doing? Feel free to post below. Also don't hesitate to join if you missed day 1.
Meth for weightloss?
/u/methweightloss88
Created: Mon Oct 31 23:23:37 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5ahgiz/meth_for_weightloss/
---
[removed]
[Rant/Rave] I hate Halloween
/u/sprinkle1997 [5'2 | CW 129 GW 100 | -25 lbs | 19F]
Created: Mon Oct 31 22:45:11 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5ahblu/i_hate_halloween/
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Don't get me wrong, it is my FAVORITE holiday! I just can't stand all the candy. I have such a love-hate relationship with food. Today I told myself I would hardly eat but ended up eating everything but the kitchen sink. I've messed up so badly and now I'm just laying in my bed wanting to cry. Ugh. I seriously just want to fast tomorrow, I can't stand feeling full. I wish I would have had more self control today. I'm trying not to beat myself up to hard...but I can't stop thinking about how terrible I was today.
[Discussion] Anyone have a thigh gap with violin hips?
/u/kafka__dreams
Created: Mon Oct 31 22:18:13 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5ah7w3/anyone_have_a_thigh_gap_with_violin_hips/
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I have an hourglassish shape but its more of a snowman because of my violin hips. I got to a pretty low weight last year but never had a thigh gap, I figure the two may be related?
Edit- ya'll give me hope, thanks kids
[Rant/Rave] Living with SO *trigger warning/ self harm*
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Oct 31 21:20:37 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5agyx6/living_with_so_trigger_warning_self_harm/
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[deleted]
[Meme/Humor] Work Food Allowance
/u/miss_morticia [5'10" | cw: 146 | gw: 105 | 20.90 | F]
Created: Mon Oct 31 20:34:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5agr43/work_food_allowance/
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My boss told me to save my food receipts while I am on a work trip for the next week. He started to give me a budget than said "Fuck it, just don't go crazy okay?". I agreed and told my husband what he said later. My husband cracked up. "So basically you're going to turn in a receipt for a couple of salads and diet coke and he'll realize you're the cheapest employee ever?"
I think he's on to me you guys. XD
[Discussion] does anyone else do this bizarre clothes-related thing?
/u/takingheatfromthesun [5'3.5"| SW 165 | CW 133 | GW 105]
Created: Mon Oct 31 20:07:17 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5agm9c/does_anyone_else_do_this_bizarre_clothesrelated/
---
so, i've noticed a current trend in clothes with food motifs on them, and i get this sort of sick pleasure out of buying and wearing them! like, it both makes me feel more in control of myself because wearing food instead of eating it, and helps me feel like i'm hiding my unhealthy eating habits because "i love food so much i'm even WEARING it, guys!"
stuff like this:
[pizza sweatshirt](http://www.forever21.com/Product/Product.aspx?BR=f21&Category=app-main&ProductID=2000228838&VariantID=)
[egg shirt](http://www.forever21.com/Product/Product.aspx?br=F21&category=top_blouses&productid=2000213804)
[hangry sweatshirt (this is a personal fave)](http://www.forever21.com/Product/Product.aspx?br=F21&category=top_blouses&productid=2000200240)
does anyone else do this??? and if so, post ur fave food clothes here for me to peruse
[Rant/Rave] I'll always be marked as the fat girl.
/u/lilialley
Created: Mon Oct 31 19:12:16 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5agchl/ill_always_be_marked_as_the_fat_girl/
---
It doesn't matter how much weight I lose, if I weigh 80 pounds. I have stretch marks in the center of my stomach. Very noticeable. I also have stretch marks on my hips, my boobs, my arms. I just want to cry, did cry a little. I feel so childish because of this.
My body will never be perfect, no matter what I do.
[Discussion] Do you guys find it necessary to exercise to have a good body?
/u/aggressivedoughnut
Created: Mon Oct 31 18:56:20 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5ag9ok/do_you_guys_find_it_necessary_to_exercise_to_have/
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When I don't exercise my body looks more feminine and smoother but exercise really helps keep my diet in check. Do you guys prefer to diet only or mix the two?
[Goal] I dont hate myself as much in this picture:) Happy Halloween guys
/u/AccaliaOmg [5'3 | 112| 19.7 | -18 | F]
Created: Mon Oct 31 18:18:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5ag2q7/i_dont_hate_myself_as_much_in_this_picture_happy/
---
https://i.reddituploads.com/49e9d042b9a34b11aaf780663de88bd1?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=58962e52af663f48e1c79e6a13e324c3
[Goal] Felt pretty good about myself today
/u/frailraven [5'10 | CW 117 | LW 115 | F20]
Created: Mon Oct 31 18:02:30 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5afzl0/felt_pretty_good_about_myself_today/
---
http://i.imgur.com/cHEp0o2.jpg
[Meme/Humor] How to eat Halloween candy.
/u/CowOffTheFarm [65" | 145 | 24.41 | - | F | GW 120]
Created: Mon Oct 31 17:48:53 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5afx3r/how_to_eat_halloween_candy/
---
1.Collect it from everywhere on campus.
2. Go buy more at the grocery store.
3. Carefully portion it for acceptable calorie counts. Hide the rest.
4. Take one bite.
5. Leave all the portions on your roommates desk because you can't bear to actually eat it.
6. Silently steal it from your roommates desk throughout the night.
[Rant/Rave] My girlfriend thinks I'm a faker
/u/russianfrank
Created: Mon Oct 31 17:43:48 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5afw7g/my_girlfriend_thinks_im_a_faker/
---
I have never been diagnosed with an ED, and would I never refer to myself as having one (I'd say I have disordered eating).
I was having an argument with my SO the other night and she brought up my eating habits. She was talking about how lately I've been doing nothing but eating out and how I've stopped exercising. She (MtF) said that if there was something she could do or somewhere she could go to get the body that she wants, she'd do it without thinking and commit to it 100%. So she said because thats not how I'm going about getting the body that I want (binging hardcore instead), I'm a poser. I'm not trying hard enough and that makes me a failure. She said she know enough about eating disorders to see that I don't have one, she just sees me eating fuck load and then starve myself for a bit, and then repeat.
Maybe she's right? I don't "deserve" to have an ED because she's right, all I do is eat then fast and still never lose weight. Maybe I am a faker and only want attention. Maybe my mind is working the way it is because I've convinced myself enough to be this pathetic.
Her comment really got to me, I'm not sure if I should listen to her or get angry and tell her that she has no idea what she's talking about. I already feel worthless and like a failure, I don't need her making me feel the same way. How can you possibly fake the way you think and the way you see yourself? I can't fake being fat, that's for sure.
I'm not sure what this post meant to achieve, maybe I just need to vent.
[Meme/Humor] MRW I ate Halo Top for the first time
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Oct 31 17:34:19 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5afuee/mrw_i_ate_halo_top_for_the_first_time/
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https://i.imgur.com/v108EQI.jpg
[Rant/Rave] WHAT THE FUCK
/u/Alexa1p [5'5'' | 110 | 18 | -10.7 | F]
Created: Mon Oct 31 17:06:55 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5afovo/what_the_fuck/
---
I've been eating a bag of popcorn a day, thinking it was around 120 calories (I googled 'calories in a bag of popcorn' and that was the end of my research because I was distracted). I didn't understand how to calculate the calories on the side of the bag because it gave a different number for popped and unpopped which seemed weird to me.
Turns out the brand I got (popsecret) has 500 calories per bag. I've been eating this for like three days fuck my life.
[Discussion] DAE freak out about the holidays?
/u/hazelconner [5'4" | 174.5 | 33.2% BF | -15.5 | X/F]
Created: Mon Oct 31 16:58:11 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5afn27/dae_freak_out_about_the_holidays/
---
I am working through a cry fest after slogging home through roving trick or treaters.
This used to be my favorite holiday. But I'm too old to trick or treat and too fat to allow myself to have candy. And since I'm too socially awkward to party I have nothing to do except go to the gym
And the next month's are hell. Between my birthday, thanksgiving, the office holiday party, Hannukah, Christmas, my brother's birthday, and New Years? It's food and booze 24/7 for the next two months and I wanna cry.
The food is what always made me happy in the past and I can't let myself have it anymore. And even if I do eat I have to be so controlled that any joy I used to have is gone.
I feel like a black hole is about to swallow me.
Anyone else?
(Mobile)
[Rant/Rave] when you say this is the last time, but you know damn well it isn't: ED horror stories.
/u/toastyhigh [5'4 | 105.6| F]
Created: Mon Oct 31 15:48:31 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5af8s9/when_you_say_this_is_the_last_time_but_you_know/
---
Around two months ago I had a scare where I thought I was genuinely dying. I felt horrid: lightheaded, cold sweats, swimming vision, heart rate too fast with chest pains, hot/cold flashes. I couldn't think straight, but in the moment I was so scared of death. Pretty much was lying on the floor thinking "okay if I don't die, this is the last time I binge and purge". In any case, even after that terrifying incident, here I am, doing the exact same thing.
I've had a few similar occurrences where I have the irregular heart rate, and shaking but that one was by far the scariest.
[Discussion] DAE feel like they will never be delicate because of genetics?
/u/thecalcographer [5'4 | CW: 105 | GW: 99 | 18.0 | F]
Created: Mon Oct 31 15:47:34 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5af8jz/dae_feel_like_they_will_never_be_delicate_because/
---
I see so many girls who weigh more than me and have more fat but look tinier/more delicate because they have smaller shoulder bones, their hips are narrower, and they have naturally leaner muscles. I feel like I'll always look big because my shoulders and hips are wide and my legs are all bulky muscle even though I don't do anything with them at all.
Does anyone else feel this way? Any advice?
[Thinspo] In order to stop myself from a Halloween candy binge, I created a thinspo/bonespo/antithinspo album.
/u/skullp00pl
Created: Mon Oct 31 15:17:26 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5af25z/in_order_to_stop_myself_from_a_halloween_candy/
---
http://imgur.com/a/SJG5S
[Rant/Rave] Relief and sadness
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Oct 31 15:09:51 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5af0iz/relief_and_sadness/
---
[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] I've fucked up again
/u/boneobsessed [5'4" | Sw 173lbs | Cw 158.2lbs | -14 lbs | Gw 95lbs | F]
Created: Mon Oct 31 15:08:50 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5af0au/ive_fucked_up_again/
---
Back to where I started with a BMI of 29.3. I had it down to 27 three months ago. What the fuck is wrong with me? Seriously I eat mindlessly, just binging until I can't anymore. It's satisfying and depressing to go through a whole bag of crisps or whatever shitty fucking food I'm eating. I want to be back in the mindset where I stopped eating, I just want to be pretty. I hate myself so much. I'm looking to go on a medication to control my binging now since I'm at a point where I'm just a wreck. I'm terrified of food yet I fucking scarf it down. I can't live like this anymore. I need to fit into my Victorian dresses, I need a thigh gap, I need hipbones, a rib cage, and collar bones that are so fucking sharp they could cut someone. I'm fucking sick mentally and I feel like nothing is going to help me anymore. I want to fit into all the tiny vintage clothing more than anything, I just want to look like a Victorian princess. Fuck I am screwed and rambling. I need help. I almost want to post a picture so I can be shamed but I'm just so disgusted I can't look in the mirror. Im sorry for this useless post. I can't deal with life anymore. Can someone just take all my food away from me? Please?
[Discussion] Working in Food
/u/sossox
Created: Mon Oct 31 14:28:30 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5aera0/working_in_food/
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So i'm currently living out my biggest nightmare. I work in a restaurant where i'm constantly around food and my biggest weakness/binge food: ice cream. It fucking sucks. If we mess up food, we get to eat it. We get half off on everything. We get free food also. It's everywhere and I can't get away from it. I'm fasting right now and typing this on my break. I'm really struggling to stay strong.
[Rant/Rave] Work Parties Are Hell
/u/carolineeo [5'7" | 113| 18.0| 20 | 21F]
Created: Mon Oct 31 14:11:12 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5aenf9/work_parties_are_hell/
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Just spent the last hour awkwardly sitting in a corner with my ice water fending off all the, "Are you going to eat anything?" & "Aren't you hungry??" faux-concern from my coworkers during our Halloween luncheon... all the food was full of butter, cream, cheese, etc etc etc like walking through my own personal version of food hell. AND TO MAKE IT ALL BETTER all the other women were talking about how they "just can't stop eating!!1!1" and "I'm totally bingeing hehee!" Please stop talking. Most of these people are at least twice my size and can't seem to correlate fatty foods = fatty body. I feel like garbage by osmosis and I didn't even eat anything. Gag me with a spoon.
[Discussion] ED book list on Goodreads. Please add your favorites!
/u/c_marier [5'6"| 113.4| 18.3 | -13 | 22F]
Created: Mon Oct 31 13:54:56 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5aejpu/ed_book_list_on_goodreads_please_add_your/
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https://www.goodreads.com/list/show/105107.Disordered_Eating
[Discussion] Motivational blogs?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Oct 31 13:20:31 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5aebxv/motivational_blogs/
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[deleted]
[Meme/Humor] #edproblems
/u/concuidado [4'11 | 83 lbs | 17.8 | -62| F]
Created: Mon Oct 31 13:00:01 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5ae77p/edproblems/
---
https://i.redd.it/tsg2ka7zxuux.png
[Help] Can anybody message me about differing eating habits in a relationship?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Oct 31 12:51:38 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5ae5ds/can_anybody_message_me_about_differing_eating/
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[deleted]
[Goal] Fasting for a month?
/u/ForeverEmptyInside [5'9"| CW:115 lbs | BMI 17 | LW:104lbs | M]
Created: Mon Oct 31 12:29:48 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5ae0en/fasting_for_a_month/
---
I fasted for a week in September,
I then fasted for 10 days in October.
I spend every waking moment of my life feeling depressed & like my life is spiraling out of control and I HATE it. Years have passed any nothing changes.
The only way I can suppress this feeling is through fasting now a days.
I think I'm going to do this.
If I die, at least I'll be skinny.
[Rant/Rave] Tastemade videos
/u/c_marier [5'6"| 113.4| 18.3 | -13 | 22F]
Created: Mon Oct 31 12:09:33 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5advsx/tastemade_videos/
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Anyone else watch these with this weird mix of fascination and absolute horror? Like who the actual fuck actually eats any of these without dying of diabetes mid-bite? The videos are literally "what unhealthy shit can we mix together and then bake and convince people to drool over?"
For real. They're just like
* DEEP FRIED OREOS
* BUT WAIT
* NOW WE BLEND THEM
* WITH DOUBLE-FAT PUDDING
* AND MIX WITH ROCKY ROAD ICE CREAM
* BAKE FOR 18 MINUTES ON A BED OF SMASHED CHOCOLATE COVERED CHERRIES
* MARINATE IN CARAMEL MELTED WITH HEAVY CREAM
* SKEWER WITH BACON SPEARS
* POUR OVER BREADED PICKLES
* BLEND IN A SMOOTHIE WITH FUNNEL CAKE AND SWEETENED CONDENSED MILK
* BATHE IN IT
* DIE OF SHAME
Ick. The videos absolutely disgust me, but I can't stop watching lol
[Other] Seems like Halloween festivities got the best of many of us, here's one of my favorite quotes to keep me from getting too down :) Even he had those days
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Oct 31 12:05:36 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5aduww/seems_like_halloween_festivities_got_the_best_of/
---
https://i.reddituploads.com/c9d13f2bea614239944ce4d5055d8405?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=b711e16688483db03585a043a9263b36
[Other] Seems like Halloween festivities got the best of many of us, here's one of my favorite quotes to keep me from getting too down on myself :)
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Oct 31 12:01:29 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5adtv9/seems_like_halloween_festivities_got_the_best_of/
---
[deleted]
[Help] Why does this happen?
/u/TfwScreechingCheeses
Created: Mon Oct 31 11:28:55 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5admgs/why_does_this_happen/
---
I did a very long fast ended by being with my boyfriend all weekend. In all I lost about 5-6lbs. I was still careful to stay below 2000 calories on Saturday (my TDEE is around 2200) and 1200 calories on Sunday.
Even after going to the washroom, my weight this morning was all the way back where I started. It can't be possible to have gained so much weight when I didn't even go over my TDEE either day. Where is this weight coming from? It's making me fast again which I know isn't good at all because I've fasted about 1/2 of this month.
[Discussion] What do you do to "recover" after a binge?
/u/concuidado [4'11 | 83 lbs | 17.8 | -62| F]
Created: Mon Oct 31 11:10:48 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5adig1/what_do_you_do_to_recover_after_a_binge/
---
I had my first binge night in over a year last night and my stomach is killing me. I stepped on the scale this morning and it said I was 5 pounds heavier but I know it has to be water weight or something bc 5 pounds is impossible to gain from what I ate.
What do you guys do to get back to normal after a big binge? Do you fast the next day? Also how long does it take you to get back to your prebinge/normal weight?
[Rant/Rave] WHEN WILL I DIE
/u/ikillsouls [5' 2" | 106 | 19.4 | Ugw: 85 |19f]
Created: Mon Oct 31 10:07:12 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5ad3xm/when_will_i_die/
---
i really hate myself. i dressed up un what i thought was a really cute outfit today. my oversized t shirt tucked into first pair of size zero boyfriend jeans. I felt so good because i knew i would get to see the boy i like today.
welp i saw him. he showed up to the school cafe that im sitting in... with a girl... a teeny tiny girl.... probably shorter than me and definetely thinner.... probably around 90 pounds.... so definitely small... and pretty, so fucking pretty
he still came up and said hi to me but all i could think about was how suddenly bloated i feel and the 100 cal coffee i was drinking bc im "treating myself" becasue im not eating today and how these jeans are probably vanity sized as shit anyways and this shirt is only oversized becasue its in a mens size and my hair doesnt look good in any way with such a round face like mine
im so self concious i feel like shit i want the earth to fucking swallow and suffocate me. im such an awful person, i just want to fast until i am nothing
**Edit: omg y'all are amazing thank you for being nice at my overreactions.**
[Discussion] [Discussion] DAE struggle with wanting to be thin and wanting to be strong?
/u/PepsiMakSe
Created: Mon Oct 31 09:46:29 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5aczdq/discussion_dae_struggle_with_wanting_to_be_thin/
---
In case my Q is a bit confusing - I struggle all the time with wanting to be this super feminine fragile little thing and then wanting to be this kickboxing fit kickass-don't mess with me- kind if girl. Both goals drive me to lose weight. But some days I'm just repulsed by food and I HAVE to eat my proteins or else I'll be weak. Idk why my mind can't choose what it wants more, I doubt I can be both of these but I always lean on the thinspo side then on the fitspo... I might have made this even more confusing now lol I'd like to know what you girls and guys think about this? What does your mental goal weight look/feel like?
[Rant/Rave] Just an update
/u/FattTea [Height 5'4"| CW 185.4 (SW 215.0) | Weight Lost -29.6| F|]
Created: Mon Oct 31 09:30:34 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5acvt1/just_an_update/
---
[removed]
[Discussion] I got through a children's birthday party!
/u/ananewsom
Created: Mon Oct 31 09:26:05 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5acuvp/i_got_through_a_childrens_birthday_party/
---
Yesterday I was at my brother's daughters 2nd birthday (yay) and I was so scared of people looking at me and at how little I would be eating.
When I got there I ate the bare minimum of food for people not to notice. When they ate 4 buns, I ate 1. When they ate cake, I was drinking coffee. When they had 4 portions of gullasch I filled one with chili and after I'd eating it I said that I couldn't eat more because my mouth was on fire.
I got back home and weighed myself and had gained no weight! I'm so proud of myself :D
[Rant/Rave] #Rant/Rave Why did I do this to myself??
/u/Gabi_Cat [5'5" | CW:125 | BMI: 20.7 | -75 lbs | F]
Created: Mon Oct 31 09:17:18 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5act0a/rantrave_why_did_i_do_this_to_myself/
---
On Saturday I was heading back down to my LW so far (121 lbs) and after a party night of drinking and a day of EATING SO MANY CARBS AND SUGAR (mostly candy...) I now weigh 126... I'm freaking out. How much of this is actual weight gain..?? I weigh myself every day and usually never go up or down any more than a pound. But five pounds... it feels like 25 lbs. This week (my birthday is in a week exactly) I WILL work out every day and stick to 900-1000 cals a day... I just can't go back to gaining. I can't.
[Rant/Rave] Omg yall I was doing pretty good!
/u/rainbowsunshinedust [5'5 | 105 | 17.68 | GW 95 | F]
Created: Mon Oct 31 09:15:41 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5acsny/omg_yall_i_was_doing_pretty_good/
---
And ive binges 3 days in a row. And not just a light binge. A fucking whole loaf of pumpkin bread in one sitting on top of eating 2 full meals binge. I am so not looking forward to the scale or the horrible shit this is going to result in. I feel so basty. Fuck alcoholism. AND fuck stress eating. 😢😢😢😢
[Thinspo] [thinspo] happy halloween! may we all become spooky skeletons 💀
/u/k-w- [5'5 | CW 95 | F]
Created: Mon Oct 31 09:06:37 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5acqmr/thinspo_happy_halloween_may_we_all_become_spooky/
---
http://imgur.com/TcTqL89
[Rant/Rave] "If you were anorexic, you could be Yzma!" (For halloween)
/u/bigeyessmallthighs
Created: Mon Oct 31 09:01:27 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5acpig/if_you_were_anorexic_you_could_be_yzma_for/
---
Said by my FWB after I did an impression of her. Our friend in the back seat: "Jesus, [his name]....."
Thanks.
Oddly, who I ended up being for Halloween was a bit obscure but luckily she had a nametag. A fat girl I didn't know at the party read it a few times and then said "Ooh I thought it said 'bulimic!'". To which my FWB said "haha yeah just need to loose a ton of weight first."
He didn't mean anything by it, just thinks I'm on a diet so guess I've been hiding things well enough.
[Other] pre-fast body check! 10/31/16 - 5'7 - 117?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Oct 31 08:17:38 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5acgnf/prefast_body_check_103116_57_117/
---
https://i.reddituploads.com/2eb15d718b5f41f6816618293794fe60?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=210f23351841f51204254693288424a5
[Discussion] Who else wants to make daily binge-free accountability posts a thing?
/u/whiimsii
Created: Mon Oct 31 08:12:24 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5acfng/who_else_wants_to_make_daily_bingefree/
---
Hi all,
I didn't join in on the recent "binge free for a week" initiative but I just wanted to say I loved the idea and I thought it would be awesome to do the same type of daily accountability posts for more than just a week.
Personally, I'm planning on doing binge-free November and hopefully December as well (I'd love to end the year on a good note but we'll see about that).
IDK if anyone agrees but it's so much easier to stay on track with something when you've committed by telling other people you're gonna do it. I think it would be so helpful to so many people on here, especially those struggling with compulsive overeating/BED.
Who else wants to make daily binge free November posts a thing? Cause I'd totally join if they were a thing. Just saying.
[Rant/Rave] Feeling bad about drinking Diet Coke...
/u/sossox
Created: Mon Oct 31 06:29:31 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5abxr1/feeling_bad_about_drinking_diet_coke/
---
It's so dumb. But I feel like an absolute cow drinking it now. I know it's 0 calories and it's my favorite thing in the world to prevent a binge and ease my fasts, but a guy just made a comment about how unhealthy it is to me and I feel gross now. "It's your funeral" Fuck off.
[Discussion] Weekly Stats Update! October 31, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Mon Oct 31 06:14:07 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5abvcq/weekly_stats_update_october_31_2016/
---
This is the weekly status thread for October 31, 2016.
The weekly status thread is to help motivate our users, and to eventually see how far they've come! Be it for weight loss, weight gain, or maintaining- everyone is welcome. Previous updates are archived [here.](http://www.reddit.com/r/proED/wiki/archives)
Please include the following information (with all necessary units of measurement):
* Height:
* Current weight (CW):
* Highest weight (HW):
* Lowest weight (LW):
* Goal weight (GW):
* Ultimate goal weight (UGW):
* Weight lost (WL):
* BMI: ([Use this to calculate your BMI](https://people.maths.ox.ac.uk/trefethen/bmi_calc.html))
* Age:
* Gender expression:
Here's a handy-dandy copy/paste of the above format:
* Height:
* CW:
* HW:
* LW:
* GW:
* UGW:
* WL:
* BMI:
* Age:
* Gender expression:
*****
Status threads are posted every Monday.
Have any questions or concerns? Comment below, or [PM the mods.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FproED)
[Discussion] Daily Food Diary! October 31, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Mon Oct 31 06:13:59 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5abvc3/daily_food_diary_october_31_2016/
---
This is a daily food diary thread for October 31, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
[Help] GF and food
/u/ar3s3ru
Created: Mon Oct 31 05:16:55 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5abno4/gf_and_food/
---
Hello guys!
I don't know if this is the right place where to post this, but I'll try anyway (eventually, I'll delete it).
So, my gf has a "kind of" eating disorder, that is:
she doesn't eat almost anything, just some selected meals like pasta with tomato sauce, pizza, chocolate, dairy products (a few of them, actually), breaded chicken, and that's all.
She told me of this habits before we were together, and I thought it wouldn't have been a big deal.
Well, it is.
We can't enjoy anything food-related together, sometimes we even fight *hard* about this.
Normally she acts like she doesn't care about her health, even though she knows that her habits are not healthy, at all. Then sometimes, when we fight hard about this, she tells me how she *want* to change, but can't.
We've been together now for 1 year and we spend a lot of time living together.
We don't live together, yet, but I would really like her to overcome this problem, with my help if necessary.
I must say, though, that _sometimes_ I managed to let her taste some fruit (apple, orange, ananas) and she was kind of disgusted by it (probably because she's not used to that taste).
And, more importantly, she's like this *since when she was 6 y.o.*
I'm actually kind of desperate right now, I tried anything I could think of and I don't know what to do next.
Can seem like an egoistic thing to do (trying to get her enjoy the food), but I'm worried about her health, especially in the upcoming years, when her metabolism is going down (she's not fat or skinnyas of today, actually).
Any suggestion?
Sorry for the long post guys, forgive me if I made some grammatical error, english is my second language :)
[Thinspo] I like drawing male thinspo, thought I'd share.
/u/IwontTryAnotherName [5'6''| 125 |19.8 | -5| f]
Created: Mon Oct 31 02:56:49 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5ab8wn/i_like_drawing_male_thinspo_thought_id_share/
---
http://imgur.com/a/uO8MG
[Rant/Rave] I think I'm dying.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Oct 31 02:37:49 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5ab75n/i_think_im_dying/
---
[deleted]
[Other] An ED group chat. Sorry if this is not allowed.
/u/delicatedeer [5'2 | 100 | 17.8 | F]
Created: Mon Oct 31 02:14:21 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5ab515/an_ed_group_chat_sorry_if_this_is_not_allowed/
---
https://i.redd.it/4i54tppsqrux.jpg
[Rant/Rave] Anxiety over thinspro
/u/zebra3stripes
Created: Mon Oct 31 02:11:35 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5ab4rf/anxiety_over_thinspro/
---
Does anyone else get extreme anxiety looking at thinspro? I always think there is no way I can end up like that and have a mini panic attack.
[Discussion] halloween <3
/u/wyydean [5'3| CW125lb | GW100lb | F]
Created: Mon Oct 31 01:53:56 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5ab32z/halloween_3/
---
lets share our costumes? i know costumes are getting so elaborate! wanna see how this awesome sub is going for the holiday!
[Rant/Rave] took my measurements, very surprised!
/u/Edible_pain [5 foot 6 in| 133 | -over 100lbs| F]
Created: Mon Oct 31 00:46:36 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5aawb1/took_my_measurements_very_surprised/
---
my under bust is 31 inches, smallest part of the waist is 27 inches, widest part of the hips is 37 inches. whoa! it sounds so tiny when i see it as numbers on the tape measure.
[Discussion] Anyone want to join me in a binge free week? Day 1
/u/goodvibeswanted2
Created: Mon Oct 31 00:05:31 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5aarph/anyone_want_to_join_me_in_a_binge_free_week_day_1/
---
I just saw the last post of mmm_erythritol's 7 day pledge to not binge eat, and I was inspired. I want to pledge to not binge for seven days. You're all welcome to join me.
If you want to join, comment below to commit to a binge-free week! Also feel free to share any other goals you may have :) Together we can do this!
Perhaps this can become a regular thing on this sub.
What do you do to plug the hunger?
/u/LibraryLuLu [H165 | CW85 | WL47 | GF]
Created: Sun Oct 30 23:46:14 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5aapiu/what_do_you_do_to_plug_the_hunger/
---
[removed]
[Help] Tremors and Light Headedness when I Fast
/u/starfishwishez [5'11" | 220 | 32.5 | -3lbs | GW: 170]
Created: Sun Oct 30 22:36:35 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5aagn6/tremors_and_light_headedness_when_i_fast/
---
Whenever I fast, within a few hours my hands and legs tremor, I get a major, throbbing headache and I feel lightheaded. Does anyone else experience this?
[Goal] Starting now, at 12:30 am, I'm going to do a 24hr fast...
/u/goddamnroommate [5'6" | 143.8 | 23.30 | -50ish | F]
Created: Sun Oct 30 22:31:06 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5aafwe/starting_now_at_1230_am_im_going_to_do_a_24hr_fast/
---
...which is nothing for quite a few of you, but im also going to be using it as a base for another three days of sub 500 restriction. I lead quite an active life and fasting is nigh impossible. But i want and need to do this for myself.
Tea, water and coffee will be allowed.
I want to clean out my body and my mind
[Discussion] Some things I can't understand about my mind as it relates to food... Anyone else in the same boat?
/u/epasternack [5'7" | CW 127 | GW 120 | BMI 19.9 | -33lbs | 22 F]
Created: Sun Oct 30 22:05:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5aac62/some_things_i_cant_understand_about_my_mind_as_it/
---
I've been thinking a lot about myself in relation to other people lately, and I have developed a bunch of questions which are a dead-end for me. Anyone have insight or shared experiences? Here's the list:
1) Do non-ED people think about food all the time? Are they constantly planning their next meals? Is food always on their minds?
2) ~~Do I really have an ED?~~ I constantly doubt the fact that my eating habits aren't typical. *Do I even have the right to call myself someone with an ED* if I'm not exhibiting the most intense behaviors that are commonly associated with the ED stereotype?
3) Why do I still hate my body? I feel the same as I did 30 lbs ago... is it because I haven't reached my goal, or is it because there's something inherently wrong with my shape?
4) Will I ever achieve my goal? Is it possible for me to like the way I look?
5) Do non-ED people have fat days? Do they feel dissatisfied with their physical forms? Is it even something on their minds? Do they look in the mirror and know what to expect?
I feel like looking in the mirror is a toss up. I worry about the imperfections of the glass causing me to look thinner or thicker than I am. I am always thinking about food, always. I feel bad because I don't fast or restrict to under 500 calories a day. I feel both inadequate in my existing self, but inadequate in my "attempts" at an ED. I feel like a poser even though I've hated my body since I was a tiny child.
Sigh. Sometimes I just don't know what to think!!
Thanks for reading.
TL;DR life is strange
Edited to reflect mod suggestion
[Rant/Rave] Dehydrated from drinking all day again
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Oct 30 21:39:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5aa8e2/dehydrated_from_drinking_all_day_again/
---
[deleted]
[Help] How to not fuck it up? (My first date)
/u/Golden-Guns [5' 7" | 158 | BMI: 25 | -35 | F]
Created: Sun Oct 30 21:19:39 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5aa5g6/how_to_not_fuck_it_up_my_first_date/
---
[removed]
[Tip] Sometimes body dysmorphia cripples me from the time I wake up. The distortions are scary & overwhelming. Press on & take pics but view them LATER to keep the dysmorphia in check<3
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Oct 30 21:09:26 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5aa3uw/sometimes_body_dysmorphia_cripples_me_from_the/
---
http://i.imgur.com/PB7TUWP.jpg
[Help] Mental Focus Issues?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Oct 30 20:45:34 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5a9zz0/mental_focus_issues/
---
[deleted]
How long was it till you saw progress through restriction?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Oct 30 20:45:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5a9zvv/how_long_was_it_till_you_saw_progress_through/
---
[removed]
[Thinspo] yumi lambert is my new obession
/u/wearebulletproof [5'4 | fat | 20F🎀✨]
Created: Sun Oct 30 20:17:31 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5a9v9r/yumi_lambert_is_my_new_obession/
---
http://imgur.com/a/T0EAE
[Rant/Rave] Fuck me
/u/kickkkasss [5'5 | CW:134 | GW:110 | F]
Created: Sun Oct 30 19:25:22 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5a9mdy/fuck_me/
---
So I've been hanging out with this guy for a few weeks now and he knows I've lost weight because it's noticeable on my Instagram pics. So we were laying in my bed naked and I made an off hand comment about how im going to start lifting weights when he fucking grabs my stomach and says yeah you could lose a little more. That comment triggered a fucking binge and now I hate myself even more. Fuck him.
[Thinspo] Reverse Thinspo TV MBFFL
/u/hazelconner [5'4" | 174.5 | 33.2% BF | -15.5 | X/F]
Created: Sun Oct 30 18:46:20 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5a9fov/reverse_thinspo_tv_mbffl/
---
Does anyone else watch tv shows like:
My 600 lb life
Supersize vs Superskinny
My Big Fat Fabulous Life
As reverse Thinspo?
Like it's a reminder of what I don't want to be and I could be if I lost control.
I'm watching WWT struggle through a 5k and whining about it. Like... that's a normal cardio workout for me.
[Help] whats more likely: a scale adding weight or a scale detecting less weight?
/u/leatherhoff [5"3 | TOO MUCH | ftm]
Created: Sun Oct 30 18:23:34 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5a9boc/whats_more_likely_a_scale_adding_weight_or_a/
---
theres two scales in my house, one upstairs and one downstairs. i usually use the one upstairs, thats the weight i go by for my flair and the weight i go by in general. but the scale downstairs shows a weight thats about 2-3lbs lighter and im not sure which to believe? the one i usually use doesnt seem to detect weight until a few pounds are on it (ive tried this by putting shampoo bottles on it) which just makes things even more confusing. i should probably put them side by side and compare them but i think the battery in the one i usually use is dying so im gonna need to get a new one asap because otherwise i cant weigh myself accurately ahahahah
anyway i just wanted to ask which one you guys think is more likely to actually be right? i think its safer to assume the heavier one is right but maybe the scale thats lighter is more accurate? anyone else got any personal experience with this sort of thing?
[Other] WTF, ED perception? The mirror says I'm WAY too fat to be Rey; the picture says I'm at least as skinny. o.O
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Oct 30 16:30:30 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5a8qtk/wtf_ed_perception_the_mirror_says_im_way_too_fat/
---
https://i.redd.it/d09y65m1uoux.jpg
[Other] things i am happy i can do now
/u/hayleystark [5'4"|NB]
Created: Sun Oct 30 16:02:48 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5a8le7/things_i_am_happy_i_can_do_now/
---
[removed]
[Help] Defeatist Attitude
/u/In_a_fatsuit [64" | 119# | 20.9 BMI | -104# | F]
Created: Sun Oct 30 15:58:59 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5a8kn9/defeatist_attitude/
---
I've been on a binge restrict rollercoaster lately. It's hard to maintain the mindset for restriction because of all the stupid holidays. I feel like whatever progress I make will be ruined so why bother.
I've gained three lbs since I updated my flair. :( I just have this stupid fucking doom and gloom defeatist attitude that is ruining everything. Guess I'm just looking for words of encouragement. I find it hard to care about anything other than not explicitly gaining. Which of course I've fucking failed at. But 3# is surmountable. I just need to fix my thinking. I need to be strict again. But I'm so terrified of coworkers noticing and losing my job. I'm already fucking weird, them knowing I am also crazy on top of weird would not end well.
I also feel like I am self sabotaging. I was five fucking lbs from goal weight #1 when I started eating more. Five. Pounds. That piece of shit inside of me will never let me just have the things I want. I can reason with shitty thoughts. But shitty compulsions like eating? There's no conversation to have. No inner mono/dialogue to manipulate. Just compulsion and execution.
I hate this fucking season. It's the season of death, fat, shivering, and hibernation. Oh yeah, and holiday festivities too. Great.
[Thinspo] Thinspo (with some reverse thinspo thrown in)
/u/w-a-m-s
Created: Sun Oct 30 15:55:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5a8jxl/thinspo_with_some_reverse_thinspo_thrown_in/
---
https://imgur.com/a/7km5y
[Rant/Rave] My mom heard me purge.
/u/raspberryfleur [5'6 (finally properly measured) | 130 | 21.0 | -30 | Female]
Created: Sun Oct 30 15:51:29 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5a8j9d/my_mom_heard_me_purge/
---
She heard me in the washroom. I told her that I ate a slice of pizza too fast (this is true) and that I felt sick to the point of puking.
Then she asked me about my binge cupboard and if I was binge eating. I honestly don't. I just hoard food. I eat a little of my stash, nothing major.
I was so embarassed. She just got angry with me, asked me where my "diet" pills were and how I lost so much weight so fast. So, I honestly told her that I just ate less.
Oh god now she's probably on my back now. And I have dinner and dessert to eat soon too. I feel like I'm going to cry. Im going to HAVE to eat the gross, fatty meal. I won't get to 129 pounds by the end of the month. And I can't even purge it. Fuck I feel like I'm going to die.
Mobile no flair sorry
[Help] Being Mobbed at Work by Fat CoWorker
/u/eboneezah [169| Fat Cow | Not Yet There]
Created: Sun Oct 30 15:50:29 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5a8j2f/being_mobbed_at_work_by_fat_coworker/
---
[removed]
[Discussion] Anyone want to join me in committing to a binge-free week DAY SEVEN
/u/mmm_erythritol
Created: Sun Oct 30 15:28:56 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5a8ewg/anyone_want_to_join_me_in_committing_to_a/
---
It's the end! Last day of the binge-free week here we gooooo
Calling all who have promised to be BINGE FREE:
/u/ToffeeCup
/u/infinitegoldstyle
/u/shortchair
/u/neveraunicorn
/u/possiblycurious
/u/UnrequitedOrgasms
/u/InSkyLimitEra
/u/gastastic
/u/alliwantistogiveup
/u/somanyjellyrolls
/u/stormyeyed94
/u/enjupoint
/u/Kishin_
/u/lymfp
/u/What_u_callme
/u/Moonlight_bae
/u/neuro-fuzzy
/u/fckk
/u/qwertyldn
/u/throwaway0908123
/u/capture_the_excite
/u/mailmesnails
/u/fringeandbinge
/u/RetailSlaveNo1
/u/IAMABaguetteAMA
/u/tattoo987654321
/u/frameworkautoco
/u/chelowelXo
/u/DontMindMeJustBingin
/u/whyaremysockswet
/u/reggiesan
/u/Phantomsgf
/u/Hummingpenguin
/u/aerienne
/u/bannaberry
/u/DieMikrowelle
/u/takingheatfromthesun
/u/-kaneki-ken-
/u/SanguineSmiles
/u/mermaid_puppy
/u/K_iwi
/u/theraindropsx46
/u/WhyRedTape
/u/leatherhoff
/u/goddamnroommate
/u/dnedna
/u/capture_the_excite
/u/whatupmyknitta
/u/b00mshaka
/u/LilyPernille
/u/TummyRumblz
**Please check in and discuss:**
**How did day six go? Did you accomplish your goals?**
**How are you feeling on the last day?**
**What do you plan to do once the week is over? Keep the streak going? Have a planned binge for Halloween?**
Hope everyone has a great day <3 thanks again to all who have participated.
Some have expressed that they would like to keep something like this going; unfortunately I can't take another week to spend as much time on reddit as I have this week, but if anyone wants to take over and do week two I would love that :))
[Help] How to fix faintness/greyouts without eating more?
/u/niahviv [5'6' | 133.5 | 21.63 | -11.5 |]
Created: Sun Oct 30 14:54:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5a88dh/how_to_fix_faintnessgreyouts_without_eating_more/
---
Hi, recently I've been running a little more (15mi/week), and I've been noticing that when I've been jogging, cleaning, or doing any sort of physical activity I start getting faint and losing my vision. I'll either have to close my eyes and get close to the floor or sit down entirely. Do you guys know why this is happening?? Could it be a dehydration/vitamin issue or is it because I'm not eating enough? If it is because of food, is there any way I can help my greyouts without eating more?
Thanks for any help!!
[Discussion] Binged so much the last few weeks, not sure how to pull myself out of it.
/u/toxic-bats
Created: Sun Oct 30 14:44:06 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5a869y/binged_so_much_the_last_few_weeks_not_sure_how_to/
---
I've been binging a lot lately, and I'm having problems trying to pull myself out of it. It doesn't help that my boyfriend just buys/makes food without asking, and sometimes it's really greasy and fattening. And he knows I want to lose weight too. I'm going to try and really restrict my calories this week, but it's going to be hard.
[Other] Found some relatability in "The Heathers"
/u/Saltycook [5'4"| 127# |21.8| -36# | Female]
Created: Sun Oct 30 13:30:02 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5a7rwf/found_some_relatability_in_the_heathers/
---
Spoilers if you've never seen it.
I was sick in bed a couple days this well and finally got around to watching this movie, dunno why I waited so long. Although I'm a few years out of high school, there were a couple characters who I could relate to. Martha, a morbidly obese, lonely girl who is the subject of the popular kid's disdain and bullying reminded me of how I was in middle school. The brunette Heather is often commented on her eating habits and bulimia, which she forgoes after the first Heather' s death.
The way these girls react to peer pressure was actually really, well not accurate, but at least relatable.
Weird, but really good movie, (and omg young Christian Slater.)
[Discussion] Anyone else get piercings just so you have a reason to get smaller so it looks better?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Oct 30 12:40:53 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5a7id6/anyone_else_get_piercings_just_so_you_have_a/
---
https://i.reddituploads.com/046e2047224a4268892b44923cc21f0b?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=c3e4697ab1480798fd44e1a750feed77
[Goal] I was a bunny gram! Super happy with my collarbones from last night.
/u/CowOffTheFarm [65" | 145 | 24.41 | - | F | GW 120]
Created: Sun Oct 30 12:30:41 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5a7ged/i_was_a_bunny_gram_super_happy_with_my/
---
http://imgur.com/a/Jm5nz
[Rant/Rave] Grandmas house
/u/zebra3stripes
Created: Sun Oct 30 11:18:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5a72d2/grandmas_house/
---
Every Sunday I go over to my grandparents to visit with them. My grandma always makes a super unhealthy lunch and by the time I leave I'm up to 1000 calories. I hate eating over there so much. I try to put small amounts of everything on my plate, but she'll sit there and push more food onto my plate.
Does anyone else have to deal with this?
I love my grandma, but I hate her food.
(I have purged food before off and on for 7 ish years. Now it's really hard for me to purge in a timely manner and I don't want to be held up in the bathroom for 20 minutes :( )
She also pulls out a giant cake at the end and cuts the slices. If I don't eat if all she looks like her feelings are hurt. Usually I have half and put the rest of my bfs plate when she isn't paying attention.
I wish my eating could go unnoticed :) it's so much easier when it's just me. When I'm in class/work/home alone I have so much control.
I love waiting until 2 or later to have some lunch and then eating dinner late
Mobile no /flair
[Rant/Rave] I hit my first big goal weight! I haven't been this size in about 2 years!!
/u/invisible_lizz [5' | 118.4 | BMI:23 l GW 90| -25.6 l F]
Created: Sun Oct 30 10:55:15 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5a6xxj/i_hit_my_first_big_goal_weight_i_havent_been_this/
---
Seriously you guys, even with hardly eating, staying under 130 is fucking **HARD** when you drink as much alcohol as I do. Not only have I maintained under 130 for a few months now, I'm finally losing!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'm so flippin excited I wanna tell the world. Although I shouldn't because I'm still at a high bmi for my size. :( Anyways, I've been very good about logging everything and staying way under my cal goals (yesterday I fasted successfully for the first time in a whiiiiiile, and I abstained from drinking!) and when I got on the scale today, it was 125!!
**125!!** I know that it's really not a big deal to a lot of you, but I was feeling like the scale would never budge and I'd always be fat. There is hope for me! Next goal is 120. Wish me luck!
[Rant/Rave] Friend said "good for you" when he overheard me worrying about calories.
/u/superfuckingsecret [5'10" | 113.8 | 16. 06| non-binary]
Created: Sun Oct 30 10:51:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5a6x9q/friend_said_good_for_you_when_he_overheard_me/
---
I was in my friend's dorm room last night pre-gaming, and they were trying to get me a mixed drink. I was kinda discreetly looking at labels and I told my friend (who knows about my ed) I don't think I can have 120 calories of mixer, I'm just going to take a shot. From across the room my other friend, who I didn't know was listening said "good for you, Superfuckingsecret!"
I'm the same size as people who people say are "wasting away" or "really thin". I weigh 117 at 5'10" but I still look like a fatass and people are still trying to get me to lose more weight. I'm going to fast until someone makes me eat.
[Help] how long until your body gets our of starvation mode?
/u/behindthearmory
Created: Sun Oct 30 09:24:47 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5a6hw3/how_long_until_your_body_gets_our_of_starvation/
---
[removed]
[Rant/Rave] I only binge if I smoke weed
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Oct 30 07:45:11 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5a626s/i_only_binge_if_i_smoke_weed/
---
[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] WARNING: poop talk
/u/P0Pkornsoup
Created: Sun Oct 30 07:19:44 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5a5yuo/warning_poop_talk/
---
Well ain't this some shit. Two days ago I ate a while bag of almonds. Only that bag of almonds, but way too many almonds nonetheless. Today, I finally pooped but it's so sticky that it's not flushing.
Shit. It doesn't wanna budge. I've flushed like 8 times and my roommates gonna wonder wtf is going on in here.
I can't lose the weight even when it's physically left my body. Lmao kill me
[Thinspo] Thinspo: Melissa Ambrosini
/u/hunterxgreen [5'4'' | too much | ditto | -22 | F | ]
Created: Sun Oct 30 06:54:14 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5a5vny/thinspo_melissa_ambrosini/
---
https://imgur.com/gallery/qXeBb
[Discussion] Daily Food Diary! October 30, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Sun Oct 30 06:09:06 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5a5qdg/daily_food_diary_october_30_2016/
---
This is a daily food diary thread for October 30, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
[Help] Struggle bus - anxiety of committing to maintenance vs losing
/u/chipmunknutter [5'10"| CW | 21.2 | maintenance | F]
Created: Sun Oct 30 04:25:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5a5ggp/struggle_bus_anxiety_of_committing_to_maintenance/
---
First off, holy crap!! It's now been 14 days since my last chew and spit binge. My new technique is to work as late as possible Friday so I'm too tired to go shopping but I also haven't had urges.
Anyway to the point. I've been maintaining well for months. Not in a healthy way but in a way - restrict heavily all week then play catch up on the weekends which while albeit disordered has been working. When I was sick a few weeks ago I said screw iy and just ate to my hunger since I was ravenous after getting better. I did the whole "oh pretend it's vacation you never take a vacation and you're eating what you consider 'clean' foods, cottage cheese and chicken even if eating way over maintenance won't cause weight gain and if so it'll be temporary." So that was done and now I'm back to usual and seriously restricted so I could lose lb this week even while overeating today as usual but I'm mentally struggling.
I've been so good at at least staying at maintenance and not sliding down my old slope of way too easy restricting and weight loss but then it's like ok maybe a few lbs less would be good. But no maintain. I'm not as small as many here but I'm an athlete which now helps me fight serious restriction urges. Then I think, you're just making excuses so you can eat more today. The competing thoughts have done a number on my mental health this weekend. I'm just so down feeling locked.
How do you deal with the ambivalence of trying to stay where you are and not go to the bad place you know you can go to and accept maintenance and a "healthy" body vs ooh maybe a few lbs?
[Help] Seriously considering suicide over a weight related comment.
/u/Navelpudding [5' 6" | 180 | -70 | F]
Created: Sun Oct 30 01:07:27 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5a4zkm/seriously_considering_suicide_over_a_weight/
---
I know it's stupid. I know it's illogical. I think it's the dumbest thing that has ever pushed me over the edge. But no matter how much I tell myself it's stupid I can't get it out if my head.
I'm falling asleep. I hope I feel better in the morning :/
[Rant/Rave] Can I just rant about being a balloon for halloween
/u/zoeglowey [5'2" | 104 | BMI 19 | - 23 | Female]
Created: Sun Oct 30 00:50:26 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5a4xx2/can_i_just_rant_about_being_a_balloon_for/
---
A couple weeks ago I posted about having a cyst in my ovary. Well, a few days ago, I got it surgically removed which is exciting because it won't cause me pain anymore, but I look HUGE because of the post surgical swelling. Like absolutely massive and I hate it. I look disgusting. And the guy I'm seeing is out having drinks with his gorgeous coworker and they're celebrating halloween and isn't that cute. I'm having such a hard time texting him about it because I'm so jealous that I'm stuck in pain and looking like a fucking whale while everyone else gets to look really cute for my favorite holiday and dress up and drink. I HATE IT.
[Rant/Rave] I'm so embarrassed and just want to die
/u/Navelpudding [5' 6" | 180 | -70 | F]
Created: Sat Oct 29 22:46:42 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5a4klp/im_so_embarrassed_and_just_want_to_die/
---
So I was fucking around on the internet and found some extremely unflattering nudes of an obese lady (really bad lighting and clearly self shot on a phone). I showed my BF (I love showing him where hitting random leads me) and he goes "are those yours?"
This lady had to be 100 lb heavier than me at my highest weight. I just want to cry, vomit, and not eat til new years.
[Rant/Rave] Whatever....
/u/xtabbithax
Created: Sat Oct 29 20:09:07 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5a3zd1/whatever/
---
I got congratulated for being pregnant today. Last week, I was happy because I had lost 5 pounds, and this week, I resemble a pregnant woman. Not that I have anything against pregnant women, but..... now I kind of want to die. :( I thought I was doing well. My pants are loose and I am down some weight and Ive been working so hard!!!! Wtf happened????
[Meme/Humor] Well...yes. But not in the way you think.
/u/invisible_lizz [5' | 118.4 | BMI:23 l GW 90| -25.6 l F]
Created: Sat Oct 29 20:07:23 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5a3z3d/wellyes_but_not_in_the_way_you_think/
---
http://imgur.com/ZsesRcv
[Help] Fasting Help (esp. with regard to binge tendencies)
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Oct 29 19:38:41 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5a3uvf/fasting_help_esp_with_regard_to_binge_tendencies/
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[deleted]
[Help] does ABC diet and other diets below 500 calories permanently damage metabolism?
/u/hunterxgreen [5'4'' | too much | ditto | -22 | F | ]
Created: Sat Oct 29 18:58:25 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5a3owq/does_abc_diet_and_other_diets_below_500_calories/
---
[removed]
[Thinspo] Susan Peters circa~1943
/u/NoiDontWannaTalk [6'0 | 142 | 19.2 | Lost: 15lbs| Male]
Created: Sat Oct 29 18:53:55 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5a3o7k/susan_peters_circa1943/
---
http://imgur.com/IvQZVX6
[Other] TabbyCats.Club chrome extension subreddit
/u/k-w- [5'5 | CW 95 | F]
Created: Sat Oct 29 18:52:49 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5a3o1b/tabbycatsclub_chrome_extension_subreddit/
---
Soooo a few days ago someone on this subreddit linked to a cat they found with the TabbyCats.club chrome extension and I thought, I *need* this. I got the extension and I find all these lovely cats but there's nowhere to share them!
I just impulsively made /r/TabbyCatsClub since it didn't exist and I know it's super niche but I thought I'd share it here since there are at least some people on this sub who use it! Sorry to be completely off topic though haha.
[Help] Back after an unintentional hiatus
/u/salamanderqueen [5'9"| CW: 149 | SW: 180 | GW: 120 | -31 | 19F]
Created: Sat Oct 29 18:23:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5a3jer/back_after_an_unintentional_hiatus/
---
I started dating this guy a few weeks ago, and he makes me so happy. Which is fantastic, and I'm really into him. But my diet has been out of control since we started dating. All of my self-control went out the window, and I've been binging pretty much every day. SOMEHOW I haven't gained more than 2 pounds, but I'm still freaking out over that gain of course. SO my question is, how do you balance having a boyfriend and an eating disorder? What are some date ideas that don't involve food? At what point, if at all, did you tell your SO about your ED?
[Rant/Rave] Fuckin hell, I can't even eat a tiny cookie without wanting to puke. 75 calories for a bloody oreo...
/u/KajaIsForeverAlone [height:5'9 | CW: 147 BMI:21 | weight lost:15 lbs | Gender: F]
Created: Sat Oct 29 17:18:04 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5a38zf/fuckin_hell_i_cant_even_eat_a_tiny_cookie_without/
---
https://i.reddituploads.com/29f657a2f1f049c3b078b0c0f599d8b7?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=2e0f4eca6f169e8a398cdaf49a9d876f
[Discussion] So I have Binge Eating Disorder
/u/starfishwishez [5'11" | 220 | 32.5 | -3lbs | GW: 170]
Created: Sat Oct 29 17:03:16 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5a36n5/so_i_have_binge_eating_disorder/
---
My step-mother used to starve me. I used to bargain and beg my sisters to share their food with me. Whenever I got it, I'd hide in the bathroom and scarf it down. Since I left home at 17, the bingeing began. I was 120 lbs 6'. Now I'm 22, 223 lbs and counting. I have stretchmarks all over my legs and arms. My face doesn't even look like my own. I have PTSD and BPD as well and I panic when I go hungry even for an hour. I hate myself. I feel like a monster. I eat to the point I am in pain, and somehow get back at it again. And I can't simply stop. My hands and legs tremor- my head spins and I can't turn away food. Is there anyone who understands what I am going through? :(
I got a job at Little Caesar's.
/u/BlackGirlSteeze
Created: Sat Oct 29 16:41:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5a332b/i_got_a_job_at_little_caesars/
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[removed]
[Meme/Humor] "Sorry guys I can go out to eat tonight I have a big dinner planned"
/u/FUCKuNSALTEDcROUTONS
Created: Sat Oct 29 16:40:19 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5a32tb/sorry_guys_i_can_go_out_to_eat_tonight_i_have_a/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/82dc9da9936242bb901efe2f39144b32?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=6d8e984cfa5859b57fbced8180982d20
[Discussion] I don't really know what to title this
/u/leatherhoff [5"3 | TOO MUCH | ftm]
Created: Sat Oct 29 16:25:28 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5a305p/i_dont_really_know_what_to_title_this/
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Do you ever get when you're binging and you like don't feel real or whatever
I dunno I feel kinda almost dizzzy I don't know if its ED related speicifcally but I don't really know where else to talk about this sorry also I binged again today aha I am bad
[Goal] No-purge November...
/u/FeedMeDreams [5'5" | 64.4kg | 23.7 | F]
Created: Sat Oct 29 16:08:35 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5a2x2d/nopurge_november/
---
Posting this here so that I can't 'forget' that I committed to it. My problem is actually bingeing - if I didn't binge, I wouldn't have to purge - but the fact that I *can* purge means I talk myself into bingeing way too often, because 'I can just undo it all later' (protip: it doesn't work like that).
Anyway, I'm fucking terrified. It's been 5 years and I'm so tired of being fat and out of control and spending all my money on shitty food that I hide from everyone. But I try to imagine my life without it, and just draw a blank. Bulimia is not as glamorous as I used to believe. I can live without it for a month.
[Discussion] is anybody else terrified by fatlogic?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Oct 29 15:54:11 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5a2uma/is_anybody_else_terrified_by_fatlogic/
---
I know so many people who are full of fatlogic and it's so scary.....the worst oneive I've heard is "fat people don't eat too much, they have bad bacteria in their stomachs that extract more calories from food". when I heard that I had a panic attack and cried in the bathroom. anything that implies being fat can't be helped terrifies me, because it means I might not be able to control my weight. I know fatlogic is ridiculous but the ED part of my brain freaks out when I hear it :( sorry for for the rant! I'm rambling on.
[Rant/Rave] Coworker said I was "wasting away"..
/u/frailraven [5'10 | CW 117 | LW 115 | F20]
Created: Sat Oct 29 14:48:20 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5a2j84/coworker_said_i_was_wasting_away/
---
God, my heart dropped when she said that. Everyone in my office looked at me too and her comment obviously made everyone else in the office uncomfortable.
Work is such a trigger for me. I can see my coworkers staring at my body and my boss recently asked if I was okay.
I know it's fucked up, but it makes me feel good...
[Help] I am having my first eating disorder physical next week and don't know what to expect. Has anyone had one before?
/u/bridget-corinne
Created: Sat Oct 29 14:20:07 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5a2ed8/i_am_having_my_first_eating_disorder_physical/
---
I have been seeing a therapist for depression/anxiety concerns for about 2.5 years now. My therapist is an ED specialist, and I think she has been noticing for a while now signs that I may be struggling with an ED. Last week she did an eating disorder assessment on me in my appointment and told me that I meet diagnostic criteria for an eating disorder, probably some form of EDNOS. She said that in order for me to keep seeing her it is a policy that I attend an eating disorder physical exam with a doctor over in the health services department.
I was really upset and angry with her for making me do all this and honestly I am still totally in denial that I have any kind of eating disorder. I honestly do not believe that I do. I do have really poor body image and am pretty obsessive about calorie counting, but lately my calorie intake has mostly only been really low because my depression/anxiety has been so bad that I completely lost my appetite, can't keep food down, and throw up every morning and sometimes after I eat just because I feel nauseous from my anxiety. So I'm frustrated that I need to attend this appointment but I don't want to lose my therapist so I guess I have to.
Have any of you attended an eating disorder physical before and know what to expect? I am pretty anxious about it. I haven't been to a doctor for about 8 years now and I'm just nervous because I don't know what it will be like. Thank you :)
[Help] How long before dinner should I stack?
/u/In_a_fatsuit [64" | 119# | 20.9 BMI | -104# | F]
Created: Sat Oct 29 14:19:25 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5a2e8x/how_long_before_dinner_should_i_stack/
---
I know most meds take 25-45 minutes to kick in, but I'm wondering at what point the effect would really be noticeable.
How early do you take your stacks when you know you're going to be drinking all night and surrounded with horrible food with drunkenly inhibited impulse control? I know it's going to end in a shitshow (always does if I drink...eh...) But I'd like to delay the shitshow for as long as possible.
[Rant/Rave] stupid halloween party
/u/salt_skin [5'4" | CW 134lbs | BMI 23.45 | GW 90 lbs | F]
Created: Sat Oct 29 14:18:02 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5a2e0g/stupid_halloween_party/
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i look forward to a particular halloween party every year. this year i finally had a cute costume and everything, but instead of having fun, i just had my self-hatred completely validated by being rejected by everyone i approached and witnessing a person i was interested in hit on my best friend. i just felt like an unattractive blob the entire night. so how do i respond? by binging until i feel ill. i hate myself so much.
[Goal] Anyone want to joint me in committing to a binge-free week DAY SIX
/u/mmm_erythritol
Created: Sat Oct 29 14:17:04 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5a2dur/anyone_want_to_joint_me_in_committing_to_a/
---
Hey all! The week is almost over! Let's all finish it strong through the weekend!!
Calling all who have promised to be BINGE FREE:
/u/ToffeeCup
/u/infinitegoldstyle
/u/shortchair
/u/neveraunicorn
/u/possiblycurious
/u/UnrequitedOrgasms
/u/InSkyLimitEra
/u/gastastic
/u/alliwantistogiveup
/u/somanyjellyrolls
/u/stormyeyed94
/u/enjupoint
/u/Kishin_
/u/lymfp
/u/What_u_callme
/u/Moonlight_bae
/u/neuro-fuzzy
/u/fckk
/u/qwertyldn
/u/throwaway0908123
/u/capture_the_excite
/u/mailmesnails
/u/fringeandbinge
/u/RetailSlaveNo1
/u/IAMABaguetteAMA
/u/tattoo987654321
/u/frameworkautoco
/u/chelowelXo
/u/DontMindMeJustBingin
/u/whyaremysockswet
/u/reggiesan
/u/Phantomsgf
/u/Hummingpenguin
/u/aerienne
/u/bannaberry
/u/DieMikrowelle
/u/takingheatfromthesun
/u/-kaneki-ken-
/u/SanguineSmiles
/u/mermaid_puppy
/u/K_iwi
/u/theraindropsx46
/u/WhyRedTape
/u/leatherhoff
/u/goddamnroommate
/u/dnedna
/u/capture_the_excite
/u/whatupmyknitta
/u/b00mshaka
/u/LilyPernille
/u/TummyRumblz
**You know the drill:**
**How did yesterday go? Did you stay binge free? How about your other goals (if you had any)?**
**How is your Saturday going? Other goals besides staying binge free?**
**What would you say is your worst binge trigger, and what are some ways you can manage that trigger? If someone in the group can't think of a way to manage their trigger, please help give them ideas!**
[Other] Telegram proED group chat
/u/skin_ny [5'9.5" | 113.6 | 16.19 | -44 | F]
Created: Sat Oct 29 13:58:47 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5a2alt/telegram_proed_group_chat/
---
Hey everyone! I posted a few weeks ago about a proED group on telegram (it's a pretty neat alternative to kik)
we're moderately active and all super cool so if you're interested in joining, we'd love to have you :) Download the telegram app (you can do it on desktop if you prefer that), sign up for a telegram account, and click the invite link below:
https://telegram.me/joinchat/DrwKHgp5LCl7_Qt9eWqxww
If you have any problems joining, pm me your username and I'll add you!
[Rant/Rave] Halo top rave at work
/u/RetailSlaveNo1 [5'2 | CW 164.8 | GW 95 | 31.22]
Created: Sat Oct 29 13:55:32 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5a2a1h/halo_top_rave_at_work/
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My assistant manager and I were facing the ice cream section at work and she asked me if I've ever tried halo top and we went on a 20 minute rave about it !!! :) I have a kindred spirit
She so skinny and I've never seen her eat so I feel like she might be one of us but I'd hate to assume.
Anyway I just felt less weird for eating it because I finally found someone who isn't grossed out by it
[Rant/Rave] So apparently I'm a disgusting animal....
/u/PepsiMakSe
Created: Sat Oct 29 13:36:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5a26sk/so_apparently_im_a_disgusting_animal/
---
Sorry can't flair /rant ,mobile user :(
The only place I actually feel slightly comfortable eating is my house. Now I don't even have that...
I usually do IF + Keto (600kcal limit). So basically I eat once a day at exactly 7PM so I can live through my workout. The second I sit down to eat my 600kcal worth of pickles, tuna and bacon (mostly pickles), my brother who was eating some take out looks at me eating my first bite and tells me :" You look like some animal. It's disgusting how much you eat, and use a fork when you eat pickles we're not savages." And I kid you not folks, he proceeds to get up and pour his food in the trash and I can hear him say "Ruined my fucking appetite , you belong in a zoo or something."
So thanks bro! Have a nice time not watching me eat for the rest of your life. Didn't eat after that bite. Just went to cry my eyes out and skipped my workout. He thinks I'm "skinny" already? Well apparently I'm some bottomless disgusting pit of a savage animal and I don't feel like ever putting anything in my mouth again. Guess it's fasting from now on for this animal.
[Thinspo] Thinspo: Baskin Champion
/u/hunterxgreen [5'4'' | too much | ditto | -22 | F | ]
Created: Sat Oct 29 13:01:32 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5a20a0/thinspo_baskin_champion/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/8b84c5e114344eceb2db361399634c71?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=5ff790bf2acb6e3c0d710b9e1a659c0b
[Meme/Humor] When people be making comments during my binging episodes
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Oct 29 12:57:06 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5a1zep/when_people_be_making_comments_during_my_binging/
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https://i.imgur.com/y2syQop.jpg
[Discussion] DAE gain like 4-5 lbs over the course of the day in water weight?
/u/invisible_lizz [5' | 118.4 | BMI:23 l GW 90| -25.6 l F]
Created: Sat Oct 29 12:26:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5a1trk/dae_gain_like_45_lbs_over_the_course_of_the_day/
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Doesn't matter if I'm even just water fasting, as soon as anything touches my lips, I bloat up and the scale reads several lbs heavier.
I *hate* it. Please tell me this is normal.
[Help] Exercise on less than 500 cals a day?
/u/behindthearmory
Created: Sat Oct 29 12:20:38 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5a1sn9/exercise_on_less_than_500_cals_a_day/
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hey girls
i've been fasting hard again lately after stopping for awhile. most of my friends run and rockclimb and i don't have the energy to do either without carbs.
i've been eating these 200 calories cliff gels/powerbar gels that have like 40mg of carbs. i feel gross doing it but it gives me the energy to power through a workout
i am noticing little actual lbs weight loss, am i sabotaging it because there are so many carbs in my diet?
any advice is appreciated
[Rant/Rave] "eat a bigmac or something"
/u/AccaliaOmg [5'3 | 115 | 20.4 | -15 | F]
Created: Sat Oct 29 12:14:24 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5a1ri3/eat_a_bigmac_or_something/
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Me, at work, freezing my ass off
"Guuuys is anyone else super cold?"
Colleague #1: "No? It's not cold in here"
Colleague #2: "R u kidding me its so hot in here"
Colleague #3: "No haha I'm so hot right now but it's because you're so small"
Colleague #4 "You're cold because you're tiny. Eat a bigmac or something"
What kind of reverse compliment was that?
Anyhow, made me feel like I was actually achieving something with my ED
[Help] Not losing any boob weight?
/u/pinotblanc [5'3 | GW:115 | 23.2 | -23 | F]
Created: Sat Oct 29 11:30:52 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5a1jey/not_losing_any_boob_weight/
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I've lost 20 pounds in the past month but none of it has come from my boobs. I'm still a 32D. My ED brain tells me that the bigger the boobs the fatter you look. This may not be true but it's really affecting me. I'm sure some people would love to keep their boobs but I really want them gone.
Has anyone else just not lost any weight from their boobs no matter their weight?
[Rant/Rave] Warning, possible tmi, and a bit of a rant. Can't flair, on mobile
/u/KajaIsForeverAlone [height:5'9 | CW: 147 BMI:21 | weight lost:15 lbs | Gender: F]
Created: Sat Oct 29 11:12:50 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5a1g7a/warning_possible_tmi_and_a_bit_of_a_rant_cant/
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So every morning I weigh myself before work. And that's fine except for the fact that my body decides to have its morning bowel movement after I'm already at work and it messes with my numbers >,< do you guys have anything annoying like that happen? Any ideas of how to fix it? Sorry if it's tmi, but I know at least one of you understands the frustration
[Help] Help, please, I'm desperate
/u/throwaway_cantstop
Created: Sat Oct 29 11:02:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5a1e8i/help_please_im_desperate/
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Lately, from the moment I wake up to the moment I finally fall asleep it seems like I'm thinking about food. How much I can eat, how much I can't, what to eat, what I shouldn't, how I don't want to eat anything but I'm too weak spirited to say no to myself or anyone else.
I spend hours looking up recipes, watching cooking shows and videos, planning and preparing meals. But I'm currently unemployed, living with my boyfriend at his parents and they all work so I feel like if I don't make something nice for dinner I'll be seen as lazy and useless. (Even though I have just finished remodeling their kitchen and I do clean dishes, vacuum and do laundry)
Anyways, this morning I woke up and even before opening my eyes I was thinking about food. So I asked my boyfriend what he wanted for breakfast, he said he was fine but that I could eat if I wanted. And that just upset me so much, I felt like I'd already failed the day. So when he went out to take care of the animals I finished the rest of my Cheetos from last night.
Then I decided I would make us both chicken and waffles, then he would eat too and it wouldn't be as bad. But no, he said he wants to have a 'purge' day (basically obstain from eating until dinner and have a light dinner) since he ate so much yesterday. I ate more than him yesterday! And I've already eaten more than him today! Fuck.
So that set me off andsince I was already in the kitchen with food on my mind I just dug myself a deeper hole. I had a granola bar, a handful of cereal, a handful of cashews and a handful of dried cranberries as well as a huge bowl of oatmeal with brown sugar. I've already eaten more than he probably will all day and I'll still be expected to eat dinner with him. I hate myself. I don't know how to stop eating. Food is everywhere all the time and I can't avoid it no matter how hard I try as soon as I see it I want it. It is driving me insane. I feel like at this point I cant get away from food anymore than I can escape myself. Please, anyone, help.
[Discussion] on a more positive note...an 'about me' thread!
/u/sunflowerfairy [4'11" | no goal weight; nothing will ever be good enough.]
Created: Sat Oct 29 10:22:23 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5a1713/on_a_more_positive_notean_about_me_thread/
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(now with more questions!)
so hard to believe that it's been six months since the last time i've seen an 'about me' thread on this sub, but that only means it's a good excuse to have a new one! so here's a thread for all you lovely folks to talk about yourselves and get to know more about each other.
**username/name:**
**nationality:**
**age:**
**relationship status:**
**what other subreddits you frequent:**
**hobbies/what you like to do in your free time:**
**pic:**
i'll start off in the comments.
[Other] It is going to be a very rough night.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Oct 29 09:37:29 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5a0z9n/it_is_going_to_be_a_very_rough_night/
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[deleted]
Youtuber seems to be lying about her weight?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Oct 29 08:38:36 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5a0pjv/youtuber_seems_to_be_lying_about_her_weight/
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[deleted]
[Tip] Tip: Sleep naked
/u/tinycat1 [165cm| 60kg | 20F | GW: 45KG]
Created: Sat Oct 29 08:06:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5a0kxu/tip_sleep_naked/
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When I wake up and go to the bathroom, the first thing I see before/after is myself naked, and I'm like, nope, gross, don't wanna see that again :/ so it kind of motivates me to starve/exercise in a weird way. Also, I leave my workout clothes near my bed, so it's the first thing I put on in the morning. I find it helps kind of forcing me to work out when I first get up.
[Rant/Rave] Bought a whole 12' pizza, and chewed and spit it all without binging on it.
/u/tinycat1 [165cm| 60kg | 20F | GW: 45KG]
Created: Sat Oct 29 07:56:30 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5a0jg1/bought_a_whole_12_pizza_and_chewed_and_spit_it/
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Just sharing a small success for me, it's not much but being drunk and wanting to drink all the wine and eat all the pizza, it feels good to get over this binge eating obsession :) I'll still fast tomorrow though cos I stuck it in my mouth anyway lmao
*12 INCH, not foot >.<
[Discussion] DAE see themselves as having a 'big frame' despite bones sticking out and measurements telling you otherwise?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Oct 29 07:36:15 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5a0gpg/dae_see_themselves_as_having_a_big_frame_despite/
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The thing is, I can see my stomach is flat. I can fit into small sizes of clothing, but whenever I look in the mirror, I just feel like I look huge. I feel like I'm an XL version of a normal person. I still see fat all over my body and cringe when I look at my flabby thighs, but being 'big' is such a huge problem for me. I feel like everyone is looking at me. I feel like everyone thinks I'm abnormally large. I feel like I'm blocking the space, when I walk into stores. I feel like this big clump of dough following people around. Or this giant. Idk.
(I'm not really sure if I should flair this a rant or a discussion. Sorry)
[Goal] I can finally see my hipbones and rib bones
/u/twigsandbones [5'6 | cw; fat | 19.4 | 18f]
Created: Sat Oct 29 07:11:16 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5a0dfo/i_can_finally_see_my_hipbones_and_rib_bones/
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So I was laying in the bath and noticed that my rib bones and hipbones stick out like hell. I still feel massive and have a long way to go in terms of my gw however it's really motivating as I'm fasting today after a horrible binge yesterday. Honestly wants me to never binge again as it's so motivating to see them.
3 months ago ago, I was overweight so I'm super happy I've got here. I have no one to share this with so thought I'd tell you guys as you'll understand the joys from these small achievements. Love you all <3
[Discussion] 'Stupid Questions' Saturday! October 29, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Sat Oct 29 06:07:59 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5a05xw/stupid_questions_saturday_october_29_2016/
---
This is the weekly 'Stupid Questions' Saturday thread for October 29, 2016.
Use this thread as an opportunity to ask any questions you might have that you feel don't necessarily warrant their own post.
Please be wary of false advice and information. Be sure to research the facts before taking anyone's advice, no matter who they are. Remember that diagnosing members is unacceptable. **Anyone looking for medical guidance should seek the opinion of a medically licensed professional.**
*****
Have any questions or concerns? Comment below, or [PM the mods.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FproED)
[Discussion] Daily Food Diary! October 29, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Sat Oct 29 06:07:51 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5a05xc/daily_food_diary_october_29_2016/
---
This is a daily food diary thread for October 29, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
[Intro] purging fish bones in a squat toilet
/u/tsundokulady [169cm | 48kg | 16.8 | grrlish]
Created: Sat Oct 29 03:10:06 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59zp1r/purging_fish_bones_in_a_squat_toilet/
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[removed]
[Other] Quick follow up from my last post cos I cant figure out how to edit a post on mobile
/u/leatherhoff [5"3 | TOO MUCH | ftm]
Created: Sat Oct 29 02:18:23 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59zkoo/quick_follow_up_from_my_last_post_cos_i_cant/
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Maybe its the reddit app I'm using, I still use reddit is fun because I'm used to it and I don't feel like having to adjust to a new reddit app all over again hahaha. But this one doesn't let me edit posts I've made.
Anyway the point of what I'm saying is that I just woke up after yesterdays binge and wowwww I feel terrible, my stomachs upset and I'm all bloated. Going four days without binging has really emphasised just how much binging was having a negative effect on my life and now I never want to binge again. I'm gonna try to fast today to make up for it and to give my stomach a chance to settle. I'll be okay 😊 I won't let this control me like it used to ever again!
Finally down to 140
/u/KajaIsForeverAlone [height:5'9 | CW: 147 BMI:21 | weight lost:15 lbs | Gender: F]
Created: Sat Oct 29 01:43:03 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59zhh5/finally_down_to_140/
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Fucking yes. I've been depressed lately since I'm homeless and stressed so I haven't been eating and I just barely weighed (and it's night and I've had a bit in my system like coffee) the more I starve the better I feel.
I just binged soooo much today ;(
/u/bubble0001
Created: Sat Oct 29 00:03:02 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59z7jz/i_just_binged_soooo_much_today/
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I just came one from work, and it was sooo stressful so as soon as I got home I just ate and now I regret it. Going on a tea fast tomorrow anyone have any good teas they'd recommend?
No flair mobile
So frustrated.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Oct 28 23:28:24 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59z3oo/so_frustrated/
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[deleted]
[Help] Has anyone tried Pocari Sweat? Is it better than Gatorade?
/u/lightfeathers [5'4" | CW 112 | GW 95 | F]
Created: Fri Oct 28 23:19:30 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59z2ok/has_anyone_tried_pocari_sweat_is_it_better_than/
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We don't have Powerade zero here, sadly so I have to find other alternatives. Gatorade is too high cal but Pocari Sweat is 25 cals per serving, I think. Is it good?
[Help] How do you fast when you know you're going to be hungry?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Oct 28 23:12:01 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59z1sq/how_do_you_fast_when_you_know_youre_going_to_be/
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[deleted]
[Other] I'm so sorry
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Oct 28 22:57:28 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59yzya/im_so_sorry/
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I accidentally posted the same thing five times earlier, I'm so sorry for spamming! I have no idea what happened. forgive me
[Goal] Happy! (NSV)
/u/operadiva31 [5'6" | CW 212.4 lbs | 34.42 | -25.2 lbs | UGW 131 lbs]
Created: Fri Oct 28 21:04:48 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59ylig/happy_nsv/
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Lately, every time I put on my everyday clothing, it's been too big. And at work the other day, all the girls were talking about being warm, and I was shivering. Hooray progress!
[Other] I think my age is contributing to my ED
/u/-lotophagi- [5'6" | 127lbs | 20 | -8lbs | F]
Created: Fri Oct 28 20:11:15 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59ydpr/i_think_my_age_is_contributing_to_my_ed/
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I've had to start lying about my age to get cast in things.
I have to keep up with girls in their 20s.
I don't look my age and I never want to. I don't want my ass to sag or my stomach to pooch like other women in their 30s. I don't want my boyfriend to trade me in in 3yrs for someone younger and fitter.
I don't want to be fat
Ever.
I am tired and I need to eat. I guess I have to eat something, fasting doesn't work well for me emotionally. Ick.
:(
[Tip] Tips for being triggered when grocery shopping?
/u/Makemewantitbad [5'5"|366|59|-38|F]
Created: Fri Oct 28 20:10:52 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59ydnh/tips_for_being_triggered_when_grocery_shopping/
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Tonight I binged and purged after purchasing my 'drug' of choice at wal-mart. I find going into a store a huge trigger for me, and would love any helpful tips you guys have to avoid this.
[Rant/Rave] I'd just like to take this moment to thank whoever invented fleece-lined tights and leggings.
/u/wearebulletproof [5'4 | fat | 20F🎀✨]
Created: Fri Oct 28 19:39:25 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59y94d/id_just_like_to_take_this_moment_to_thank_whoever/
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You da real MVP.
[Rant/Rave] What is with all of the progress pics?
/u/KillingKylie [5'5| Meh|-38|F|GW: 97]
Created: Fri Oct 28 19:32:22 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59y841/what_is_with_all_of_the_progress_pics/
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I used to really love this community and the support we gave each other in regard to our ED and related issues. I know this opinion is going to be unpopular and at this point I accept that and will just find a new community but I cannot and will not shut my mouth any longer.
THIS IS NOT PROGRESS PICS, 1200 IS PLENTY OR LOSEIT EXTREME. THIS IS NOT A FUN GAME OR A QUICK WAY TO SHED SOME POUNDS. ED'S ARE NOT A PLOY FOR ATTENTION.
TO THOSE OF YOU COMING HERE FOR TIPS; ED'S ARE MENTAL ILLNESSES, WE ARE NOT CONTAGIOUS AND WONT "TEACH YOU" OUR "WAYS" YOUR ACTIONS ARE UPSETTING AND DEGRADING IN MY OPINION AND IT NEEDS TO STOP.
THIS. IS. NOT. A. DIET. SUB. STOP. FUCKING. TREATING. IT. LIKE. ONE.
Edit: To clarify, I am not bitching about our weekly progress pic thread. I think most of us are aware of the exact type of posts I am pissed off about.
Retired a bed frame. Gained some laundry. Lost 17 pounds in 5 weeks. Before/after 158.8 today, I'm 5'4".
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Oct 28 18:51:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59y240/retired_a_bed_frame_gained_some_laundry_lost_17/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/7194c6dc65ed4168b8a2a6e9d7ae6945?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=7a77479bbc3c462076c98cca4fb3d553
[Discussion] Sorry if this is really ignorant but...what's the damage?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Oct 28 18:32:52 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59xz40/sorry_if_this_is_really_ignorant_butwhats_the/
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[deleted]
About to go on a spontaneous outing with a sugar daddy D:
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Oct 28 18:28:47 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59xyg3/about_to_go_on_a_spontaneous_outing_with_a_sugar/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] My bf is fat shaming me?
/u/zebra3stripes
Created: Fri Oct 28 18:15:32 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59xwbn/my_bf_is_fat_shaming_me/
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[removed]
[Rant/Rave] really panicky and stressed out at a Halloween party
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Oct 28 18:06:03 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59xusb/really_panicky_and_stressed_out_at_a_halloween/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] (can't flair but I guess Rant/Rave?) I got invited to a Halloween party and I'm REALLY overwhelmed
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Oct 28 17:54:33 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59xsxm/cant_flair_but_i_guess_rantrave_i_got_invited_to/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] Stressed the fuck out about a stupid party.
/u/invisible_lizz [5' | 118.4 | BMI:23 l GW 90| -25.6 l F]
Created: Fri Oct 28 17:43:36 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59xr4k/stressed_the_fuck_out_about_a_stupid_party/
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I'm going to a Halloween party in a few days. People that I no longer talk to will be there, mingling with current friends. Looks like nothing but water and black coffee until Sunday. I need to be at least 5 lbs lighter to feel ok at this party. Which isn't going to happen and I won't even pretend it could because it will only make me more disappointed when I put my costume on and see how fat I'm going to look in front of them, God, and everyone else.
It's just a fucking party, I should be ready to relax and have some fun. But no. I'm sitting here chugging water and running to the bathroom every 10 minutes because I can't deal. So much for having fun in my 20's I guess.
[Discussion] Group chats?
/u/jaciepoohxox
Created: Fri Oct 28 17:26:15 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59xo58/group_chats/
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First, sorry for no flair, I'm on mobile! But I was wondering if there were any group chats that I could join?
Peeps! Super happy with my weigh in today!!
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Oct 28 17:22:33 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59xnjc/peeps_super_happy_with_my_weigh_in_today/
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[deleted]
[Help] Methods to fight urges to self harm?
/u/damn_it_linda [5'4" | 122 | -28 | F]
Created: Fri Oct 28 17:20:14 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59xn61/methods_to_fight_urges_to_self_harm/
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Hello, loves ❤
Long story short, I've recently found myself in a cycle of purging again. It's been years since I've done this, and the urge is back and startlingly strong. It's one thing to eat restrictively, but when you're making friends with the toilet on a nightly basis, it feels very very fucked up. Not to mention it hurts. My face is swollen, acid reflux, broken blood vessles, raw mouth...This hole gets very deep very quickly for me, and I wanted to reach out to people who may understand.
What do you do when you have a strong urge to purge or engage in self harming behaviors? How do you distract yourself, or what methods do you find to help?
[Rant/Rave] was binge-free for 4 days, my longest time in ages, then I fucked up :-(
/u/leatherhoff [5"3 | TOO MUCH | ftm]
Created: Fri Oct 28 16:56:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59xix7/was_bingefree_for_4_days_my_longest_time_in_ages/
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I've been pretty heavily restricting this week and tbh I feel great and I have already noticed the difference over just a few days. I don't eat during the day and then I eat around 400 cal or less when I get home in the evening. That was working fine until I thought it'd be safe to get some lunch at work. There were two problems with this: 1. I couldn't calorie count it 2. It was waaaay earlier than I usually eat my daily meal at. So by the time I got home I was hungry again. Long story short I binged. Not a super big one, maybe around 1000 cal or a bit more but still enough for me to feel like I've undone aaalll of the progress I've made :-( it seems a bit silly to ask but could I get some reassurance that I can get back on track? I'm scared I'm gonna get back into my old habits and I really don't want that because I was so happy earlier when I noticed the effect restricting has had! Aaaagh
[Rant/Rave] "You're so tiny!"
/u/invisible_lizz [5' | 118.4 | BMI:23 l GW 90| -25.6 l F]
Created: Fri Oct 28 16:08:23 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59xahe/youre_so_tiny/
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Is what they used to say at 108ish. Then I ruined it by binging and drinking. Went up to 144. (can't even believe that number.) Now finally broke my plateau and I'm under 130 again. No one calls me small anymore.
I'm working on getting to sub 100. I just want to hear those words again. It's so hard when you're short.
[Goal] Missé Beqiri. Ultimate Girl Crush and Goal.
/u/ResurrectionOfMarion
Created: Fri Oct 28 16:04:06 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59x9om/missé_beqiri_ultimate_girl_crush_and_goal/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/25331088407547899bf1b7e7377a54da?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=d755118559a5c9515c5cc9567c7c0afb
[Discussion] Depression triggers ED? End up using food as punishment?
/u/bumblers [5'8"| 125.3 | -20 | F]
Created: Fri Oct 28 15:50:02 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59x759/depression_triggers_ed_end_up_using_food_as/
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I always find that when my depression is worsening, or when my anxiety is sky high, my eating disorder becomes the huge number one top priority in my life, because I have total total total control over it. It's mine. It shows that I am strong and not a slave to the basic hedonistic human impulse to eat despite all my other faults. I know that's wrong, and unhealthy, but I don't care, because it's such an insane comfort.
But then food becomes a punishment. Like if I let myself eat, I just know it'll make me feel like absolute shit, and I'll beat myself up over it for weeks. So I use that as a method of punishing myself, you know? I don't eat as a reward (even though that hurts too.)
But then when I'm happy and things are good, the ED can take a back seat. Yeah I'll restrict and fast and hate myself, but it's more passive. Less obsessive. I miss my ED when it's like that, miss feeling totally in control.
Sorry for the ramble, and no flair (mobile...) but it's been a shit day, and a shit week, and it's just hard.
[Thinspo] Model Thinspo
/u/mourir01 [5'6 | CW: 123 | GW: 90 | F]
Created: Fri Oct 28 15:30:24 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59x3dt/model_thinspo/
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http://imgur.com/a/qBxHS
[Goal] Does a thigh keyhole count for anything?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Oct 28 15:16:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59x0t9/does_a_thigh_keyhole_count_for_anything/
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https://imgur.com/rKCoMjv
[Tip] Body visualizer that shows common word associations with your body type!! Can't put in stats but I just estimated
/u/Canibalope
Created: Fri Oct 28 15:12:02 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59wzvz/body_visualizer_that_shows_common_word/
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http://bodytalk.is.tue.mpg.de/
[Other] I just ruined my friend's day
/u/scandinaviandreams [6'0" | 131 | 17.93 | F]
Created: Fri Oct 28 15:03:34 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59wy72/i_just_ruined_my_friends_day/
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So I have a friend who's working towards losing weight right now. She was texting me all happily about these "low cal noodles" and how they're a god blessing, only 78kcal a packet. Curious I'm like "what brand are they?" and she sends me a picture of them.
They're not 78kcal per packet. They're listed as 78kcal per 100ml, but the whole serving is 500ml so thats 390kcal :( my friend was devastated when I told her this, and she ranted on about how she has been eating these for *days*.
Honestly, this would be a nightmare scenario for me.
[Other] I just bought 1000 laxatives, oh my, just kill me now. Haha, ha. Not so 'ha'.
/u/aerienne [5'5" | 145.8 | F]
Created: Fri Oct 28 15:02:20 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59wxy1/i_just_bought_1000_laxatives_oh_my_just_kill_me/
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Couldn't find any cheap laxatives with bisacodyl in this damn country. Everything was senna or various herbs. Found generic bisacodyl online but they only sold it in a bottle of 1000. Still cheaper that a few boxes here.
Dear Zeus, my ED is laughing at me. I know my limit on laxatives and I only bought them because you simply cannot go cold turkey on them and I used them for years. No way I'll ever go through 1000....hopefully. But I have.
Dark humor: I tried searching this country's Amazon for bisacodyl laxatives and, no joke, it only had posters of the pills. Because that's what I need. A huge poster of thousands of laxative pills. Thanks, Amazon. You sure know your clients.
[Help] I want to lose weight but I want to donate blood?
/u/imnevergold [5'6 | 112 | 18.15 | -15 | F | ]
Created: Fri Oct 28 15:01:24 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59wxqo/i_want_to_lose_weight_but_i_want_to_donate_blood/
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The Red Cross states that in order to donate blood you have to be at least 110lbs. Do they actually weigh you when you go to donate blood? If I'm trying to lose weight how can I go under 110lbs and still be a blood donor? If I binge before a blood donation to make the weight requirement how easy will it be to lose the weight?
[Rant/Rave] I need to get this out of my system after a binge
/u/twigsandbones [5'6 | cw; fat | 19.4 | 18f]
Created: Fri Oct 28 14:57:44 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59wwyu/i_need_to_get_this_out_of_my_system_after_a_binge/
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So I visited home again and became an out of control mess again and ate alot of calories. It was first because my parents cooked me some food and then it just turned into a really messy, gross binge. I really hate myself for it as I'm at my LW however I'm not going to try and beat myself up about it as tomorrow is a new day. I'm planning to water fast and study so I don't binge tomorrow and I've really gone off the food I've binged on(It was all really gross and enjoyed none of it). I'm now going have a little cry and let it all out however I will lose it and I will stop binging when I'm in out of control situations!
irony
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Oct 28 13:56:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59wkuj/irony/
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[removed]
irony
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Oct 28 13:56:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59wkuh/irony/
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irony
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Oct 28 13:56:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59wkug/irony/
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irony
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Oct 28 13:56:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59wkuf/irony/
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irony
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Oct 28 13:56:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59wkue/irony/
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[removed]
[Rant/Rave] irony
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Oct 28 13:56:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59wkud/irony/
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I'm happy because I'm too sad to eat....I had a small fight with my super control freak parents and I got really anxious! now my stomach has a knot in it and I couldn't eat anything if I wanted to....at least I'll stay under my 500 cal goal today
[Intro] Anyone here from PrettyThin or PrettyThinAgain? AKA PT/PTA/Pt2
/u/invisible_lizz [5' | 118.4 | BMI:23 l GW 90| -25.6 l F]
Created: Fri Oct 28 13:36:34 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59wgt9/anyone_here_from_prettythin_or_prettythinagain/
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Hey all. Basically what the title says. My username was the same on the forums as it is here.
I was a member since 2010(?) on PT and when everyone moved to PTA, so did I.
I don't go there at all really anymore because of one of the frequent posters, also the attitude has switched to pro-recovery, and it's just not something I'm interested in. This subreddit is the closest thing I've found to Old PT, was wondering if anyone used to be/is a member there. Probably no one will know who I am, but it's worth a shot.
[Other] The only thing I'm proud of is my legs
/u/wanskie [5'5 | cw: 135 | bmi: 22.5 | F]
Created: Fri Oct 28 13:24:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59wed5/the_only_thing_im_proud_of_is_my_legs/
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http://imgur.com/a/ePNtq
[Discussion] How do ya'll keep your meds/vitamins down?/Booted up my throwaway so I can comment here now
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Oct 28 13:23:16 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59we0f/how_do_yall_keep_your_medsvitamins_downbooted_up/
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[deleted]
[Discussion] Anyone want to join me in committing to a binge-free week DAY FIVE
/u/mmm_erythritol
Created: Fri Oct 28 13:19:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59wd9o/anyone_want_to_join_me_in_committing_to_a/
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*"Three months from now, you'll wish you worked harder today."*
Happy Friday! And it will be a happy Friday because we are all staying BINGE FREE!
/u/ToffeeCup
/u/infinitegoldstyle
/u/shortchair
/u/neveraunicorn
/u/possiblycurious
/u/UnrequitedOrgasms
/u/InSkyLimitEra
/u/gastastic
/u/alliwantistogiveup
/u/somanyjellyrolls
/u/stormyeyed94
/u/enjupoint
/u/Kishin_
/u/lymfp
/u/What_u_callme
/u/Moonlight_bae
/u/neuro-fuzzy
/u/fckk
/u/qwertyldn
/u/throwaway0908123
/u/capture_the_excite
/u/mailmesnails
/u/fringeandbinge
/u/RetailSlaveNo1
/u/IAMABaguetteAMA
/u/tattoo987654321
/u/frameworkautoco
/u/chelowelXo
/u/DontMindMeJustBingin
/u/whyaremysockswet
/u/reggiesan
/u/Phantomsgf
/u/Hummingpenguin
/u/aerienne
/u/bannaberry
/u/DieMikrowelle
/u/takingheatfromthesun
/u/-kaneki-ken-
/u/SanguineSmiles
/u/mermaid_puppy
/u/K_iwi
/u/theraindropsx46
/u/WhyRedTape
/u/leatherhoff
/u/goddamnroommate
/u/dnedna
/u/capture_the_excite
/u/whatupmyknitta
/u/b00mshaka
/u/LilyPernille
/u/TummyRumblz
**For today's check-in, please discuss:**
**How was day four?**
**How is your Friday going? Any other goals?**
**What strategies do you use to avoid weekend bingeing? With the weekend almost upon us, lets fill our mental armory with weapons against bingeing!**
Thanks guys! You've all been so wonderful in these posts and I just want you all to know that I'm so grateful, from the bottom of my heart, for all the support you're giving to me and each other.
[Discussion] Weight loss on adrafinil?
/u/hazelconner [5'4" | 174.5 | 33.2% BF | -15.5 | X/F]
Created: Fri Oct 28 12:54:55 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59w83w/weight_loss_on_adrafinil/
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I just bought some adrafinil pills from nootropics city. I heard it makes you super focused and kills appetite. Anyone have any experiences? I'm losing about 5 lbs a month and it's just not enough for me.
[Discussion] DAE bring food from home to school/work bc they're afraid they'll binge on it??
/u/knobbje
Created: Fri Oct 28 12:37:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59w4lz/dae_bring_food_from_home_to_schoolwork_bc_theyre/
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I casuay bring sweets from home to my school and share it with my friends, so I only eat little at school and can't binge on it later
[Help] I just want someone to tell me that it's ok to give up and kill myself.
/u/kpatable [5'9" | 127.4 | 18.5/18.8 | -19.6 | F]
Created: Fri Oct 28 11:50:10 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59vub8/i_just_want_someone_to_tell_me_that_its_ok_to/
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I don't want to live anymore. The only reason I'm staying alive is because my boyfriend and pet hedgehog need me. Otherwise, I would probably lie in bed all day until I mustered the courage to overdose on my four antidepressants. I've reached out. But honestly, when someone says "it will get better," all I can hear is "you're stupid for thinking it won't get better," or "you're just not trying hard enough," or "you should be ashamed for wanting to die because you don't have a good enough reason." And then I just feel even worse and want to die even more. I have so much good going on in my life right now. But none of it actually makes me feel good. I feel like nothing matters. I've run out of energy. I don't want to try anymore. It's too hard. Is my desire to give up valid?
My (amateur artwork) and how I want to feel
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Oct 28 11:24:11 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59voo4/my_amateur_artwork_and_how_i_want_to_feel/
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http://i.imgur.com/uqNHKXM.jpg
[Help] I just threw out last nights leftovers because I thought they were meant for me.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Oct 28 11:22:31 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59vobc/i_just_threw_out_last_nights_leftovers_because_i/
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[deleted]
[Help] Need a scale on a budget
/u/throwaway03199519 [glob]
Created: Fri Oct 28 11:12:20 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59vm6k/need_a_scale_on_a_budget/
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So the scale I have is SO inaccurate and actually had been telling me I was 118 when I was actually 113. I only trust my weights from the doctors office. But I'm starting to get antsy and really wanna be able to weigh at home.
What scales do you guys own that are accurate and not too expensive?
[Help] Will I lose weight if I don't hit my calorie goals?
/u/Atsugaruru
Created: Fri Oct 28 10:56:14 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59vit7/will_i_lose_weight_if_i_dont_hit_my_calorie_goals/
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Hey guys. I've had Binge Eating Disorder since I was a little kid, but I'm recovering! Two weeks binge-free and I'm still going strong!
I'm trying to lose the weight I gained thanks to BED by eating 1200 calories a day. But hitting 1200 is so hard sometimes, it seems like so much food, and I can't get through meals without crying.
If I eat less than my calorie goals will I still lose weight? I've been eating about 800 calories a day. Everyone says your body refuses to lose weight if you eat too little, but I'm too scared to eat so much.
[Discussion] Drugs and restriction?
/u/dnedna [5'7" | 116 | 18.15 | GW:110 | F]
Created: Fri Oct 28 10:54:50 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59vij0/drugs_and_restriction/
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Does anyone have any experience of taking MDMA whilst restricting? I’m supposed to drop for the first time tomorrow night and am not sure if I should do anything differently in terms of calories or macros for harm reduction/having a good experience generally.
Any advice?
[Help] What are EC Stacks?
/u/alypso
Created: Fri Oct 28 10:49:03 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59vhci/what_are_ec_stacks/
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Can someone explain to me what are EC stacks, I see them mentioned a lot on here.
[Thinspo] Viktoria Belany - 5'9" and 99lb
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Oct 28 10:17:56 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59vavo/viktoria_belany_59_and_99lb/
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http://imgur.com/a/Jll7i
[Rant/Rave] I don't know where else to post this
/u/simplyapartyboob [5'8 | HW: 170 | CW: 140 | GW: 120 | 21.06 | F]
Created: Fri Oct 28 10:08:56 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59v90s/i_dont_know_where_else_to_post_this/
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So I'm new-ish to posting here but I just need to get some shit off my chest & don't know where else to go. I've been able to manage my ed pretty well the past year or so, and I've been purge-free for over a month now but I just went through a really bad breakup and it's been fucking with every aspect of my life. I'm scared I'm going to have to drop out of college & I don't want to be even more of a disappointment. I've even been restricting super consistently & dropping a nice amount of weight until yesterday I had to fuck it all up and eat over 1000 :( I'm just having such a hard time finding motivation to do anything, except eat and eat. I just can't let myself bc if I do have to drop out at least I'll drop out skinny lmao. All my thoughts are consumed by suicide & calories and I don't feel like I have anyone I can turn to. Also can't flair on mobile
[Rant/Rave] My SO found out
/u/coffeecoffeecoffee90 [5'5" | CW: 127.0 | GW: 120 | -31 | F]
Created: Fri Oct 28 09:57:12 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59v6h4/my_so_found_out/
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He found my account so he knows about the Bronkaid, the restricting/fasting, but thankfully not about the purging because I'm too embarrassed to tell anyone about that and admit to myself that it's become a habit in certain situations.
He wants me to stick to at least 1000 cals a day, no EC stack, and keeps asking me to eat. Thankfully nothing about eating back an exercise deficit. It's only been two days and I'm thinking of a million ways I can lie about it. But I can't bring myself to lie to him. I've answered his questions honestly but definitely just skimmed the surface. He just wants me to talk to him and to see a therapist about it.
I honestly feel like when I get to my goal weight I'll think seriously about recovering from whatever this is for his sake, but I'm less than 10 pounds away and if I stop now it feels like this was all for nothing. And I'll just be waiting it out until he stops asking if I ate today before I can keep going. I want to hit my goal weight by Christmas and I know I can still do that as long as I keep burning more off by running and going to the gym but I feel like such a giant disappointment.
I'm just not ready to do this and I hate that I'm hurting him now too instead of just myself.
[Other] I feel awful
/u/zomboooo [5'7|115|18.1|-2|NB]
Created: Fri Oct 28 09:29:43 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59v0z8/i_feel_awful/
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I ended things with a guy I liked because I knew that it would end up nowhere and I didn't want to deal with that. I told him that if he didn't text me back I would assume that he agreed that going no contact would be best.
Well he texted me back a week later wanting to see me but then he never texted me back about actually hanging out. And then last night I saw him at cvs and he totally avoided me. Wow. It's like what do you want from me? I gave him an easy way out and he knows how I feel. Why are my feelings being toyed with??
I've been bingeing since last night because I'm so confused and hurt. I hate this.
[Discussion] Some positivity
/u/c_marier [5'6"| 113.4| 18.3 | -13 | 22F]
Created: Fri Oct 28 08:52:14 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59uthk/some_positivity/
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I know I personally spend so much time complaining and worrying and ranting, so I want to take a second and focus on what I am thankful for. Here are a couple random things:
* My Aldi has started selling cashew milk! So now I no longer have to make a specific trip to Target and pay fifty cents more.
* The public bathroom at work has a full-length mirror that I have to walk toward every time I come in. It's nice seeing that angle - since it's the one that most people see of me, but it's sometimes hard to see myself full-body walking toward myself lol.
* My work has a mini gym with everything I need! I've been working out 3-4 times per week and feeling GREAT! Swiss ball work out are the BOMB, guys!
* Last Friday I was flipping out over being 118 but this morning I weighed in at 113. BOOYAH
* My boyfriend has started getting into health and fitness which is AWESOME. It gives me good motivation because I've always been the more athletic person in our relationship and now I have to work to keep up and keep from becoming the couch potato of the relationship. He's becoming more focused on eating healthy - which makes eating around him so much easier, because he used to be such a source of temptation with crap food, but now is trying to avoid buying crap in the first place.
* ALSO after this weekend (my alma mater's homecoming), my bf is planning to try and give up alcohol for a few weeks to a month, and usually he's the main person I drink with, so now in support, I get to avoid those calories as well.
* I live three stories up and just realized that I never run into anyone when I'm walking up the stairs inside the building. I've started pacing up and down the stairs if I'm freaking out about too many calories or have extra time/energy etc. and it's a really nice release.
Life is good, folks. What (ed related or not) are you happy about right now?
[Rant/Rave] Finally beat the October BingeFest [rave]
/u/disbeetch [5'3'' | 140 | 23.7 | -34 | F]
Created: Fri Oct 28 08:50:01 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59ut2h/finally_beat_the_october_bingefest_rave/
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This month has involved SO MUCH FOOD every single weekend. But I've been restricting so hard this week especially (~300cal/day) and this morning I hit my lowest weight since high school. I'm so proud of myself for finally making some progress!!! I also fit into my slutty Halloween costume from junior year of high school so hellllll yes
[Discussion] DAE not weigh themselves?
/u/RainyDayDaydream [5'6 | ?? | ?? | ?? | Lady]
Created: Fri Oct 28 08:38:32 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59uqw2/dae_not_weigh_themselves/
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Think the title says it all. Is there anyone out there who doesn't weigh themselves?
I dont, honestly because then I know it would be my drive to just get far, far worse in terms of my ED behaviours and I dont want to end up in a clinic again. Even before then, I never weighed myself and don't know my current weight.
Instead I kind of just go by how...I look/feel, and how clothing fits on me.
I calorie count and do all the rest. Just. Weighing. My weight. It scares me.
[Discussion] Preventing health problems while re-losing weight?
/u/antimeridian [crystal gems don't eat]
Created: Fri Oct 28 08:28:51 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59up1x/preventing_health_problems_while_relosing_weight/
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I’ve been WR for three months and want to lose some of it, but I’m trying not to die and/or be sent to treatment again (good plan, right?). My new GW is pretty reasonable — it’s as low as I could go the first time before experiencing serious difficulties. Unfortunately, I’ve heard that the health problems associated with restricting are quicker to come the second time around, and I really can’t afford more physical issues, as I still have amenhorrea and a bad heart. Has anyone else had experience with being WR and then re-losing the weight? Was there anything you did to make it easier on your body?
[Discussion] I felt sort of terrible for thinking this, but I daydreamed about having an irl "bulimia buddy"
/u/Shelbolovesnate [5'2" | 100 | 18.95 | 35 | F]
Created: Fri Oct 28 08:19:53 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59unes/i_felt_sort_of_terrible_for_thinking_this_but_i/
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We could binge our faces off together shamelessly on a bad day, and go off to vomit in adjoining bathrooms. Hug each other and cry when the scale didn't show what we want.
But then my next selfish thought was, I would probably get jealous if she started to get thinner than I was. It's not a competition, but I can't help but to compare myself. I'll just have to content myself with the thought that they are out there, even if I don't know who they are.
[Rant/Rave] Dropped weight having fun :))
/u/cry_baaby
Created: Fri Oct 28 08:17:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59umwk/dropped_weight_having_fun/
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so happy <3 haven't checked my weight in a week due to dates/parties/school, checked today and I'm 6 lbs down!!! really motivating !
[Rant/Rave] Forced to eat a candy
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Oct 28 08:15:48 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59ummw/forced_to_eat_a_candy/
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[deleted]
[Meme/Humor] feels while binging
/u/namelessgia
Created: Fri Oct 28 07:41:19 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59ugh5/feels_while_binging/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/8ff9d8b4a01f40cb87c9df7f8fbe0fb7?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=ae2c422cff84e9778c5a8f3857e1afc2
[Discussion] DAE's face get puffy when you restrict?
/u/hunterxgreen [5'4'' | too much | ditto | -22 | F | ]
Created: Fri Oct 28 07:06:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59uasr/daes_face_get_puffy_when_you_restrict/
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Whenever I restrict or restrict to lower calories etc at first my face gets puffy. My hands too a bit. If I ever go off plan it goes away a bit. It's odd and a bit sad bc I'm restricting and losing weight yet my face looks bigger
[Help] Frustrated
/u/Butt3rfli3s [5'2" | CW: 220 | BMI: 43 | Weight Lost: 63Lbs | Gender: F]
Created: Fri Oct 28 06:35:59 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59u5tk/frustrated/
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[removed]
[Rant/Rave] OMYGOD im so excited and I can't share this with anyone else but you guys
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Oct 28 06:28:25 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59u4mg/omygod_im_so_excited_and_i_cant_share_this_with/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] I've put on half a pound and I feel like I'm going to throw up
/u/OperatingOnScientist [5'3 | 128.6lbs | 23.41 | F | UGW 100lbs]
Created: Fri Oct 28 06:18:11 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59u36s/ive_put_on_half_a_pound_and_i_feel_like_im_going/
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I don't know why I've been so stupid and eaten so much when I knew this would happen. I want to cry and throw up everything I've eaten. I will never be beautiful at this rate
[Discussion] Weekly Selfie, Progress Pic and OOTD Thread! October 28, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Fri Oct 28 06:12:14 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59u29e/weekly_selfie_progress_pic_and_ootd_thread/
---
This is the weekly picture thread for October 28, 2016.
Feel free to share your selfies, progress pics or outfit-of-the-day (OOTD) pics in this thread!
**Rules**
1. Be nice, **or you will be banned.**
2. Please use [imgur](http://imgur.com/) as a host.
Consider adding commentary on featured brands, sizing, inspiration behind your OOTD (trying to look thin or cover up weightloss, etc.)!
**Remember that anyone can view the contents of this thread even if they are banned from this subreddit. If you receive unwanted messages, please contact the mods with a screenshot of the relevant messages. Note that even if we ban people, they can still message you, and they still have access to the contents of this subreddit. The best thing for you to do is to block them.**
*****
Selfie, progress pic and OOTD threads are posted every Friday.
Have any questions or concerns? Comment below, or [PM the mods.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FproED)
[Discussion] Daily Food Diary! October 28, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Fri Oct 28 06:12:06 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59u28d/daily_food_diary_october_28_2016/
---
This is a daily food diary thread for October 28, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
[Other] I feel so secretive
/u/kennedyconnolly [5'9| 120 | 17.4]
Created: Fri Oct 28 05:14:16 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59tuw3/i_feel_so_secretive/
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i posted last night about a team dinner, but SURPRISE my parents are gonna make me eat dinner when i get home. :((( so now i need to run more so i can allow myself to eat dinner. after practice im gonna say "im gonna be late i have to pick up cookies from my brother (i am bringing cookies so this is good) and then im just gonna run a quick extra three miles. im just scared someone on my team is gonna catch me.
[Thinspo] This picture of young Ryan Ross
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Oct 28 04:46:15 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59trmx/this_picture_of_young_ryan_ross/
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https://i.redd.it/uv08g6y537ux.jpg
[Meme/Humor] Me eating after an EC stack
/u/notthinohno [161cm |125.2lbs | 22.45 | - 51lbs | F]
Created: Fri Oct 28 04:37:50 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59tqof/me_eating_after_an_ec_stack/
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http://i.imgur.com/M8sbWTn.gifv
[Rant/Rave] bottomless pit of hunger
/u/Edible_pain [5 foot 6 in| 133 | -over 100lbs| F]
Created: Fri Oct 28 02:16:56 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59tcto/bottomless_pit_of_hunger/
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So, my psych doc increased my zoloft. I had a splitting headache for 3 days, and ate everything in the house... including kiwi candy that i am allergic to. *facepalm* i needed to take a few benedryl, some OTC pain killers, a drink of absinthe. I am so bloated, I guess I didnt need that new hole i punched in my belt last week.
tl;dr adjusting to a higher dose of meds SUCKS.
[Rant/Rave] when youre on another website talking about food
/u/gin-and-lemon [🐝 5'1"| cw: 150lbs | bmi: 29 | -15lbs | f]
Created: Fri Oct 28 01:52:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59tahb/when_youre_on_another_website_talking_about_food/
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and you are trying so hard to keep it normal
avoiding just only chatting calories, avoiding calling eating a box of poptarts binge eating and shit like that
and then someones like "lol i ate a box of granola bars over three days is there therapy for this???"
and you just like *wide eyed gum smile* u aint seen shit bitch
in other news i binged on fucking poptarts which i bought because i was like "damn girl u been exhibiting lots of control and being good so heres a treat"
yeah u only had control because u didnt buy garbage food dipshit congratz on being a dumbass
in other other news this whole post is garbage
[Rant/Rave] The ED gods giveth and the ED gods taketh away?
/u/Melatoninsky [5'3"| CW:104.4 lbs | GW: 99 lbs | F]
Created: Fri Oct 28 01:01:49 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59t5b8/the_ed_gods_giveth_and_the_ed_gods_taketh_away/
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Uh so today was supposed to be a planned b/p evening. I waited for literally weeks, for the perfect set of coincidences where everyone would be out for a solid 3 hours and I'd have the house to myself to eat stuff I've been disallowing myself and then purge safely and do no damage (lol). Then, a literal fucking premonition... Watch, my family would end up staying home at the last minute.
I was right. Guys, I was so pissed. Like I wanted to cry. I had everything ready.
... So I ate dinner in my room like a moody, shady fuck and then purged anyway because fuck it. Whatever.
But then I weighed myself before having a shower and i somehow lost a whole pound since this morning despite skipping the gym (all week because I'm a lazy fuck). I think I weighed myself like 40 times, moving the scale around to different places in the bathroom, holding my giant shampoo bottle to make sure the weight changed accordingly. Yep. 105 105 105. No fluctuation. Er? Thank you ED gods??
I just hope this particular gift doesn't get taken away.
[Discussion] Anyone else have a love/hate relationship with jeans?
/u/reggiesan [5'0" | 138 | 28.38 | -27 lbs | F | GW: 110]
Created: Fri Oct 28 00:29:04 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59t1vt/anyone_else_have_a_lovehate_relationship_with/
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Honestly, jeans can either be a big motivator or a big trigger for me. Putting on a pair of old jeans I expect to fit only to have a muffin top is so crushing. But, on the other hand, having that perfect pair of jeans fit feels so good. I don't think I've worn jeans in over a year for fear of the muffin top, but again, kind of a motivator. Any one else feel this too?
[Goal] I was going to binge on pasta, but I didn't :D
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Oct 28 00:27:27 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59t1pr/i_was_going_to_binge_on_pasta_but_i_didnt_d/
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I had eaten too much, anyways, but when I went for my second portion, I poured it up, poured it back a couple times, ended up taking three pieces of pasta and putting the rest back. I'm still at 600 calories already, but I'm treating myself to a Diet Monster and a new lighter tonight, so I think everything is gonna be good. I was faced with an entire box of my favorite pasta, and I didn't eat all of it. I'm so happy. This might not sound like much, but it was definitely a victory to me. Pasta is also my biggest binge-food.
I realized how many calories it was gonna set me back, and I realized I was always gonna be able to access pasta. Pasta wasn't gonna leave me and never come back. I did not need pasta now. I drank some water and made some licorice tea instead.
I also dropped two pounds over night, which is a pleasant surprise. Yeah. Today is gonna be good, I think.
(I'm not sure if this is in the 'goal' or the 'other' category)
[Discussion] What is the most weight you lost in a month?
/u/nauticaI [5'3.5" | BMI 19.8 | F]
Created: Fri Oct 28 00:25:32 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59t1i8/what_is_the_most_weight_you_lost_in_a_month/
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https://www.reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59t1i8/what_is_the_most_weight_you_lost_in_a_month/
[Help] Assisting my girlfriend who suffers from an eating disorder.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Oct 27 23:52:39 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59sxk3/assisting_my_girlfriend_who_suffers_from_an/
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[deleted]
[Intro] Thought I'd do an intro
/u/shortchair [5'6" | 108 lbs | 17.5 | -60 | F]
Created: Thu Oct 27 23:15:38 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59st8f/thought_id_do_an_intro/
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I've posted a bit and lurked a lot and thought I'd do a formal intro. I'm 28 years old and have been stressing about my weight since I was five years old. I had one best friend since kindergarten and I remember ever since I met her thinking about how much smaller her calves were than mine. I didn't understand of course, I was just jealous. I eventually attritbuted it to genetics; she had a tiny mom and I had a mom who was ALWAYS on a diet.
My mother throughout my entire childhood was a part of a weight loss program. She weighed in every Thursday. Every Wednesday, without fail, she would say, "I can't eat today." She recieved awards for reaching her goal weights in the past. She had photo albums dedicated to these moments. She was so happy in those photos. In day to day life, she was miserable. She was in constant battle with her weight all through my childhood. She was vocal about it. In fact, my entire extended family was. They placed value on weight. Despite this, I was never shamed for my weight. I was a normal weight through childhood, but after pregnancy, ballooned up to to borderline obese. I fell into a deep depression after giving birth, and my only happiness became food.
After three years, enough was enough. I got a gym membership, researched weight loss and educated myself on calories, BMR, and TDEE. I lost 25 pounds in 3 months. I felt great. Everyone complimented me. I couldn't stop.
A year later I was hospitalized three times. Once for suicidal ideation, once for a suicide attempt and once for a panic attack that they ended up holding me for because of my low weight and I was diagnosed with anorexia. I checked myself out after a week against medical advice. I looked at food and cried. I wanted to die. Then my grandfather died, and I thought..."what a selfish fuck I am." I was shopping for something to wear to his funeral and in the dressing room I saw every bone and muscle in my body. I went to his funeral and heard everyone whispering about me. So I ate. I ate and ate and ate.
I ate my way back up to my highest weight from 3-4 years prior. I was an alcoholic. That's where most of the weight came from. Then someone I knew got a DUI. I stopped drinking. I stopped eating again. I lost most of the weight again. So here I am. There is much more to this story and it doesn't all make sense, but here I am. I'm willing to talk to with anyone, so many of you here seem so intelligent and it's so revealing to have things to common with people when I thought I was crazy for so long.
So maybe I am crazy but I'm not alone.
edit: for spelling and typos >_< (and flair)
[Thinspo] This pic of young Leo DiCaprio...
/u/NoiDontWannaTalk [6'0 | 142 | 19.2 | Lost: 15lbs| Male]
Created: Thu Oct 27 23:03:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59srpt/this_pic_of_young_leo_dicaprio/
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http://imgur.com/lkeL5pA
[Discussion] DAE get night sweats?
/u/concuidado [4'11 | 83 lbs | 17.8 | -62| F]
Created: Thu Oct 27 22:49:51 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59spu7/dae_get_night_sweats/
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Ever since I started upping my calories a few weeks back (I went from eating an average of 200-360 calories per day for about 4 months to 640 per day now) I am starting to get night sweats.
I wake up covered in sweat all over my back but at the same time I'm cold? I read some other forums and they all say it's part of recovery but I am still not eating at my BMR or TDEE.
Has anyone else experienced this?
[Rant/Rave] My mom is my biggest trigger
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Oct 27 22:38:13 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59sobh/my_mom_is_my_biggest_trigger/
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My mom is morbidly obese. Despite that, she was the one that kickstarted my very first diet. That diet spiraled into my food problems. At that time, she was dieting too, but she gave it up completely, and gained probably twice what I lost.
Due to the whole ED thing, I really dislike my mom. Sometimes, I'll be finally giving in and walking out for a portion of food, and I'll see her munching on half a chocolate-cake and I'll just feel disgusted, because I really don't wanna end up like her. I don't ever wanna be that obese.
I've seen her without a shirt on and I just cringe. I can't eat when I'm around her, because I want nothing less than to 'become her' I hope anyone can relate.
[Rant/Rave] About to purge
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Oct 27 21:41:33 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59sg68/about_to_purge/
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[deleted]
[Thinspo] Who is your ultimate thinspo?
/u/thecalcographer [5'4 | CW: 105 | GW: 99 | 18.0 | F]
Created: Thu Oct 27 21:29:42 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59sebe/who_is_your_ultimate_thinspo/
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If you could look like anyone, who would it be?
[Thinspo] Small thinspo/bonespo album I made this morning.
/u/skullp00pl
Created: Thu Oct 27 21:26:03 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59sds3/small_thinspobonespo_album_i_made_this_morning/
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https://imgur.com/gallery/pCCLS
[Discussion] does anyone else use words as thinspo?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Oct 27 21:16:02 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59sc93/does_anyone_else_use_words_as_thinspo/
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certain words are such thinspo to me...my favorites are delicate, dainty, petite, tiny, fragile etc ^_^ what are yours?
[Goal] I've lost 56 lbs.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Oct 27 20:38:50 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59s6cz/ive_lost_56_lbs/
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http://imgur.com/a/wf2L2
[Meme/Humor] X-post from r/fatlogic, thought you guys would approve.
/u/NoiDontWannaTalk [6'0 | 142 | 19.2 | Lost: 15lbs| Male]
Created: Thu Oct 27 20:34:11 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59s5na/xpost_from_rfatlogic_thought_you_guys_would/
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http://imgur.com/Yx3vsEl
Avoiding food at family/team/friend dinners
/u/kennedyconnolly [5'9| 120 | 17.4]
Created: Thu Oct 27 20:04:53 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59s0hv/avoiding_food_at_familyteamfriend_dinners/
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[removed]
[Rant/Rave] Boyfriend doesn't even care anymore when I purge
/u/H2OandCaffeine [5ft7 | FAT | -20 lbs | F]
Created: Thu Oct 27 19:50:03 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59rxo3/boyfriend_doesnt_even_care_anymore_when_i_purge/
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That should be a victory of some sort right? I can purge in peace now. But instead it just feels lonely. Now I'm all alone with this shit and nobody gives a fuck. :/
How will eating frozen yogurt effect me?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Oct 27 19:09:25 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59rqwj/how_will_eating_frozen_yogurt_effect_me/
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[deleted]
[Goal] Got a long way to go, but it's a start. Before and during. [Progress]
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Oct 27 18:44:21 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59rmtn/got_a_long_way_to_go_but_its_a_start_before_and/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/3b27bc262a5648919f945d29e5db51ff?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=e20178ab70be4731bc14702b50fcc753
[Other] there's bones and muscles in here somewhere,
/u/archerofdawn [154cm | CW 157 | GW 88 | -7 | NB]
Created: Thu Oct 27 18:32:13 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59rksj/theres_bones_and_muscles_in_here_somewhere/
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now if only I can shed this fat like some grossly oversized triple-layered sweater instead of unraveling it one stitch at a time.
[Goal] Holy shit I fit into an xs at American Apparel..
/u/frailraven [5'10 | CW 117 | LW 115 | F20]
Created: Thu Oct 27 18:31:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59rklo/holy_shit_i_fit_into_an_xs_at_american_apparel/
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http://i.imgur.com/TpmhpdP.jpg
[Meme/Humor] I need you as much as I need food
/u/GrammarNaughtsy [5'3" | 102 | GW: 98 | F]
Created: Thu Oct 27 18:06:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59rg7n/i_need_you_as_much_as_i_need_food/
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I don't.
[Help] Oh man you guys
/u/rainbowsunshinedust [5'5 | 105 | 17.68 | GW 95 | F]
Created: Thu Oct 27 18:05:12 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59rfxg/oh_man_you_guys/
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I just binged 2500 cals. I'm not purging but I fucking hate myself right now how do I not purge tho I feel so sick and my bf wont let me
[Discussion] Weird ED fantasies..
/u/ResurrectionOfMarion
Created: Thu Oct 27 17:48:41 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59rcyq/weird_ed_fantasies/
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Does anybody else ever dream and fantasise about being pregnant purely for having a bump and a reason to eat whatever you want? It's kinda sick but whenever I bloat and want to wear something tight I'm like 'I wish I was actually pregnant so I had an excuse'. Weeeeeeird. Also when fasting, almost EVERY night I have dreams about binging then wake up feeling guilty as hell even though I had 0 kcal the previous day.
[Discussion] when you burn calories do you take advantage of the deficit and eat more, or eat the same as usual and net less for the day?
/u/namelessgia
Created: Thu Oct 27 17:39:11 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59rbbq/when_you_burn_calories_do_you_take_advantage_of/
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firstly, when i say "eat more" i mean to have a total calorie count that's close to what it would be on days you don't exercise, just you've had more because you've burnt some off. i'm sure most of you got that but i just wanted to clarify in case. sorry for the long question, i hope it makes sense! i burnt a fair amount of calories today and it got me wondering what you all do!
[Goal] Okay my goals from now to Christmas
/u/loving_life0_0
Created: Thu Oct 27 17:07:51 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59r5ni/okay_my_goals_from_now_to_christmas/
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[removed]
[Discussion] Cals when sick?
/u/capture_the_excite
Created: Thu Oct 27 16:54:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59r3d4/cals_when_sick/
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Does anybody know if you burn more calories when you're sick? I like to think that I do and I've been eating more while I'm sick which makes me feel horrible. If I'm burning more than usual then I guess it would be okay.
[Meme/Humor] Anybody else find this to be MOSTLY accurate???
/u/Katiari [6'3" | 229 lbs. CW | 28.6 BMI | 175 GW | F]
Created: Thu Oct 27 16:13:22 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59qvrw/anybody_else_find_this_to_be_mostly_accurate/
---
http://imgur.com/a/diisJ
[Help] i need help.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Oct 27 15:38:14 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59qp0l/i_need_help/
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guys, i'm seriously at a loss right now...
my mom finally decided to stop being complacent and silent about my eating and say:
"i've watched how much you've been eating... and you're practically starving yourself. i'm sorry, but i can't see you doing that to yourself.. you're all ready skinny i don't understand why you want to lose more weight..."
she kept going on and on about it till she finally said she won't let me eat so little anymore and i know her - she's going to bring this up around my family and it's going to be extremely awkward until i start eating more. i'm just so upset because i'm only four pounds away from my first ever goal weight... four goddamn pounds... and with how much i've been eating lately (between 450 and 550 calories) i would be reaching it sometime between next friday and next monday (i'm currently losing between 1.5 lbs and 2 lbs a week).
i'm so goddamn afraid of upping my calories to 900 and 1200 a day - what if i gain everything back? will i still lose weight eating that much? 900 calories? 1200 calories? won't i gain??
agh. i don't want to throw this all away... i'm so goddamn close to my goal and this has to happen??
i'm so torn because i know that if i keep eating so little my family is going to take action and thats the last thing i want and need but i'm so afraid of gaining weight from upping my intake from 450 - 500 calories to 900 - 1200.... i'm so convinced i won't lose weight anymore... i just want to get to my goal.
what should i do? because i'm so lost and i need your help.. you're a lovely community and i seriously have no one to talk to about this.
[Rant/Rave] does anyone else get seriously triggered by period bloat?
/u/clamshells [5'7 | 115 | 18.0 | f]
Created: Thu Oct 27 15:23:18 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59qm2z/does_anyone_else_get_seriously_triggered_by/
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even when i rationally know that i'm looking and feeling bigger because of my period, i still get so panicked and just want to lie down and die. and of course it's so much harder to restrict on my period so then i end up eating way more anyway...
and then after it's over i go back to normal and wait for next month's freak-out lol
ugh. i'm just pissed because i'm period-fat and i *know* i'm gonna look like a pig in my halloween costume.
anyone else?
[Help] I'm bloated and it won't go away
/u/OperatingOnScientist [5'3 | 128.6lbs | 23.41 | F | UGW 100lbs]
Created: Thu Oct 27 15:07:42 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59qj3j/im_bloated_and_it_wont_go_away/
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I've lost over a stone but I'm so bloated it looks like I've put on a stone instead of losing any :( I'm not eating too much salty foods so I'm so confused. Does anyone know how to lose this bloat? I'm so scared that it won't go stop and it makes me want to cry
[Rant/Rave] Shouldn't have weighed myself today.
/u/wanskie [5'5 | cw: 135 | bmi: 22.5 | F]
Created: Thu Oct 27 14:49:49 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59qfhk/shouldnt_have_weighed_myself_today/
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I thought I was doing good but I weighed myself and I gained two more pounds within the last month. It doesn't seem like a lot but I'm literally 5 pounds away from my heaviest weight.
I was so in love with the way I was starting to look in June. I graduated and looked so small in my dress and my arms were so skinny.
I feel so disgusting and I'm in such a depressed state of mind all the time and it's not helping because I just want to binge all the time and have no energy to work out. :-(
[Help] Bloated face
/u/kickkkasss [5'5 | CW:134 | GW:110 | F]
Created: Thu Oct 27 14:47:48 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59qf3z/bloated_face/
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Does anyone else's face get super bloated after a binge? I've been binging for like a week now and every time I look in the mirror my face looks so fat but I can't tell if it's actually fatter or all in my head.
[Other] I have strep throat
/u/peony_princess [6'0" | 128.5 | 16.75 | F]
Created: Thu Oct 27 14:05:01 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59q6c1/i_have_strep_throat/
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...which sucks, but it also means it hurts to eat anything, which means people are very sympathetic to me only being able to drink water and tea. yay?
[Help] Pants Sizes and Trust Issues
/u/stealthmode_activate [5'1 | Moo | Ugh | -60 | F]
Created: Thu Oct 27 14:00:28 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59q5ab/pants_sizes_and_trust_issues/
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So I've mentioned elsewhere that the only thing holding up my pants is literally the fat in my ass. A couple weeks back I had to buy new pj pants as mine were dropping to the floor, and today I bought another pair by a different brand. Both are the same size, but I can't find sizing information anywhere online to gauge if the size I bought is the *real* size or *vanity* sizing. (René Rofé and Yawn but not Yawn London, if by chance anyone has bought the same pants and has some vague idea as to whether or not the sizing is actually real size)
Any pointers on how to determine if an item is vanity or true size without having your own waist measurements available (I don't trust that I'm measuring myself accurately)? I'd be over the moon if I thought for even a moment that I'd seriously dropped three pants sizes, but I'm having a lot of difficulty believing that. :/
[Thinspo] Marin Crampe is a pole dancer and her body inspires me daily - she's delicate but so strong at the same time.
/u/caithaa [5'7|122|19|one day at a time 🌼]
Created: Thu Oct 27 13:52:55 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59q3rh/marin_crampe_is_a_pole_dancer_and_her_body/
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2HROqflUrGI
[Rant/Rave] muh legs || down to 52.8kg || actual rave
/u/Lady_Anarchy [169cm | CW: 53kg | GW: 50kg | BMI: 18.56 | F]
Created: Thu Oct 27 13:42:20 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59q1nt/muh_legs_down_to_528kg_actual_rave/
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https://i.redd.it/pxqpw9aul2ux.gif
[Thinspo] Calling all fall & winter thinspo!
/u/SoFetchBetch [5'8 F CW:115 GW:105 LW:107 HW:138 WL:24]
Created: Thu Oct 27 13:34:52 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59q03c/calling_all_fall_winter_thinspo/
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Hey guys, can we have a cold weather thinspo thread? I need some extra motivation to stay away from the bad foods coming up this weekend haha.
Also recipes for low cal fall & winter treats would be cool. Personally I like to add nutmeg and cinnamon to black coffee for low cal pumpkin spice. They also have black pumpkin spice coffee at Wawa if you live near one! I do the same thing with adding cocoa powder, cashew milk, and monk fruit extract to coffee for a low cal hot chocolate feel. Recipes for hot cocoa and cookies would be a lifesaver.
[Rant/Rave] The last 10 lbs (sad rant)
/u/whydoeshewantit
Created: Thu Oct 27 13:24:04 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59pxsz/the_last_10_lbs_sad_rant/
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Hey guys. I usually post with a different username but this is a pretty delressed rant and I don't want it in my post history on that account. I've been here since almost the beginning and I just love the hell out of you people. You helped me get to my lowest weight ever and you've been with me through some incredible highs and lows (& not just on the scale lol.) Anyway on to the self pity party. ***[skip to the bottom for the part where I ask for advice.]
I've been going through some tough times lately. A bad relationship ended violently and I was depressed and eating like shit for over a week after and I ruined all my summer progress. :( I was finally getting back to my lowest weight (107) at 111 after a good 3 day fast and then I went through that binge period and I'm constantly hovering between 114 and 116 since. It's driving me crazy. For some reason I can't stop binging at night ;-; Some days I check the scale and I'm almost back at 120 which I don't even remember the last time I weighed that much. It makes me feel so out of control. Like I'll never get back to 107. And I'm destined to balloon back to my HW of 138. Please dear god no...
I've also been weak to eating dairy which I try to avoid because it makes my acne/skin terrible and I just keep eating cheese and butter on toast ;-; ;-; ;-; idk why even... I find myself craving the carbs and salt and I do gross things like add salt to the butter after it's spread. Ugh! So nasty!! Empty carbs like bread and pasta are on my very unsafe foods list. I have pcos and eating those foods or sugary foods makes me crave it even more so its like this cycle I can't seem to escape.
I know what I want. And I sometimes stay strong. But even eating safe foods is triggering binges lately. It used to be so easy for me to subsist on coffee and tea and cucumbers. I'd go days and days eating so little and not even thinking about it. Now my scumbag brain comes up with excuses late at night about why I can eat bad foods.. "oh well, 115 is pretty good. You're still much smaller than you used to be. And this way people won't say anything to you and make you uncomfortable. You *should* eat more calories for the day. It's healthier to be 115." But like... eating crappy food isn't the path to recovery!! It's just weakness.
I just now decided to make my new GW 105 so I'm 10 lbs from my goals. It seems like so little to most I'm sure and people love to joke about how women always want to lose 10 lbs. But to me this seems like a gigantic mountain and I am so helpless to climb it. I miss my clothes fitting me perfectly and looping my belts to the smallest setting. I wanted to be lower this Halloween than last year. I was 107 last year and now I'm a disgusting lard. Fuck. Why did I let this happen. :(((
***Ok... I'm done complaining and feeling sorry for myself. Anyone have any tips for getting back to the mindset where restricting is a no brainer? I'm constantly obsessing about food right now and I fucking hate it. The only thing that helps is looking at thinspo when I think about eating and getting naked in front of my mirror. If I try to eat anyway putting the mirror next to me makes me stop but sometimes I hide it so I can binge. I need some solid rules/strategies to avoid this.
I know that if I commit to no/low carb and no dairy I'll stop craving it. I'm thinking about attempting a fast, 1-3 days and buying some kombucha to fill my stomach once it gets empty. I've read that the bacteria which feeds on sugar can get out of control and kombucha has good bacteria in it so I guess my logic is that I'll bolster the good bacteria by going on a kombucha fast. Ugh this sucks. Please tell me I can do it guys :( sorry I'm being so pathetic. I just need to find some strength.
[Rant/Rave] NSV: Super proud of myself!!!! Binged, but ended up going for a run
/u/LazyFawn [165cm | 57,6kg | 21,2 | -7,4 | 17 f]
Created: Thu Oct 27 13:21:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59pxbi/nsv_super_proud_of_myself_binged_but_ended_up/
---
my first run in 2 months guys!!
my plan today was eating just an egg for breakfast, and perhaps a little dinner in case my parents wouldn't buy the whole "i'm nauseous" ordeal.
but i got home from school, and i ended up just sitting on the couch eating chocolate and ugh. i ate for almost 491 calories (which is actually a small binge for me, so i'm pretty proud there too actually). but the bad (well, good) thing is that i can't purge, as i have a vomit related anxiety.
so i pushed myself to go for a run to burn off the calories.. and it went super well, i even enjoyed it a bit, which is rare for me lol. endomondo says i burned 422 kcal, but i think it might be lower as it was just 5 km in 37 min.
anyway, i'm well under what i planned to eat, and mfp says i've eaten for 141 kcal today, which i'm pretty proud of
also i just wanted to say thanks to this amazing community for keeping me strong on the bad days, even if i really just lurk. you're all great <3
[Help] going home
/u/DieMikrowelle [5'5| 136lbs | 22,7 | 50lbs | W]
Created: Thu Oct 27 13:09:22 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59puq6/going_home/
---
I'm currently living abroad in belgium and I'm doing alright. tomorrow I'll go home until Wednesday (long weekend) and my mum already planned all the meals!
i need help and inspiration to stay strong and not binge on her delicious glorious food. :/
it's so hard. please send me your thoughts!
[Rant/Rave] The last 10 lbs (sad rant)
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Oct 27 13:08:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59puls/the_last_10_lbs_sad_rant/
---
[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] I feel like I'm required to binge for other people's birthdays.
/u/Navelpudding [5' 6" | 180 | -70 | F]
Created: Thu Oct 27 13:02:15 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59pt77/i_feel_like_im_required_to_binge_for_other/
---
We are going to dinner, if I don't eat I'm rude. There's cake, of I do t eat a small piece, it's rude. If I ditch them, it's rude. I just want to lose weight in peace!
[Rant/Rave] It's hard having an SO with an ED.
/u/star-of-morning [5'1" | no clue | went to treatment | send help]
Created: Thu Oct 27 12:58:19 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59psdq/its_hard_having_an_so_with_an_ed/
---
I posted a little while ago how I met my current girlfriend when I was in residential treatment. She (used to) mostly restrict with a bit of bingeing and purging. Well, her bingeing wasn't necessarily eating mass quantities of food, it was like eating lots of unhealthy foods in normal quantities, but frequently. E.g. having a donut for breakfast, McDonald's for lunch, pizza for dinner.
Anyways, I have been restricting quite a bit since Monday. My maintenance (according to the dietician at residential treatment) is around 2200 because of my high activity level. Since Monday, I've been eating sub 800 calories. Still a lot, but way less than I've been eating since like, June.
I get so worried that I might be triggering her. Despite my restriction, she has still been eating adequately. But it makes her sad that I don't eat. She says she misses being able to cook nice breakfasts for me, going on our late night ice cream runs, etc. But honestly? Part of that disgusts me. I don't want to eat donuts or french fries or ice cream (aside from Halo Top haha) anymore. I'm sick of it all.
Why am I such a fucking hypocrite? I would NEVER want her doing what I'm doing but I can't stop myself from fucking submitting to my eating disorder. Last night she begged me to drink some Ensure since I didn't have dinner. But I couldn't. I just couldn't. I wanted to, for her, but I couldn't get myself to drink it. I feel so bad.
Another reason why I'm a horrible person - I cannot WAIT until she goes back to work so I can restrict in peace. I won't have to be around her all day while she eats a piece of cheesecake or a bowl of Ramen. I won't have to be so sedentary just sitting on the couch with her most of the day watching movies and shows. I can do what I want.
Ugh.
I also have these intrusive thoughts that I could break up with her at any moment. I could break up with her, she'd move out, then I wouldn't have anyone to recover for. I would be in the same predicament I was in in June when I was relapsing so hard, with no reason to get better. But then I'd lose the love of my life because of my fucking eating disorder. It breaks my heart that I even *think* about breaking up with her just so I can stave myself.
[Goal] My jeans don't fit me anymore.
/u/tinybites [5'6" | F | sw: 185 | cw: 153 | gw: 115]
Created: Thu Oct 27 12:58:03 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59psbz/my_jeans_dont_fit_me_anymore/
---
About a month and a half ago I decided I'm going to start wearing what I want and start stepping outside my comfort zone. I love the "vintage / librarian chic" look but just never felt comfortable wearing dresses daily. I'm almost 24 and usually wear skinny jeans and band tees. I want to just feel more put together and in control of my life.
I've been doing so well on not going over in calories and not binging for a full 50 days today. I'm down 29 lbs but I've been feeling like I really can't tell at all. Yesterday I ran out to the post office and just went to throw on some jeans for the first time in at least a month. My jeans don't fit anymore. They are WAY too big, even belted. This is such a good feeling, and a push to keep going even harder.
[Thinspo] The singer of Crystal Fighters is my Thursday Thinspo
/u/Scars_N_smiles [5'5" 134.5 21.5 F]
Created: Thu Oct 27 12:21:49 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59pkt9/the_singer_of_crystal_fighters_is_my_thursday/
---
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1C7-bA5TibY
[Thinspo] The singer of Crystal Fighters is my Thursday Thinspo
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Oct 27 12:11:38 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59pish/the_singer_of_crystal_fighters_is_my_thursday/
---
https://www.youtube.com/watch?time_continue=26&v=1C7-bA5TibY
[Goal] Anyone want to join me in committing to a binge-free week DAY FOUR
/u/mmm_erythritol
Created: Thu Oct 27 12:09:24 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59piam/anyone_want_to_join_me_in_committing_to_a/
---
*"Don't give up what you want most for what you want in the moment."*
Hey all! We're over the hump now–let's keep it going strong through the weekend!
Calling all who have promised to be BINGE-FREE!
/u/ToffeeCup
/u/infinitegoldstyle
/u/shortchair
/u/neveraunicorn
/u/possiblycurious
/u/UnrequitedOrgasms
/u/InSkyLimitEra
/u/gastastic
/u/alliwantistogiveup
/u/somanyjellyrolls
/u/stormyeyed94
/u/enjupoint
/u/Kishin_
/u/lymfp
/u/What_u_callme
/u/Moonlight_bae
/u/neuro-fuzzy
/u/fckk
/u/qwertyldn
/u/throwaway0908123
/u/capture_the_excite
/u/mailmesnails
/u/fringeandbinge
/u/RetailSlaveNo1
/u/IAMABaguetteAMA
/u/tattoo987654321
/u/frameworkautoco
/u/chelowelXo
/u/DontMindMeJustBingin
/u/whyaremysockswet
/u/reggiesan
/u/Phantomsgf
/u/Hummingpenguin
/u/aerienne
/u/bannaberry
/u/DieMikrowelle
/u/takingheatfromthesun
/u/-kaneki-ken-
/u/SanguineSmiles
/u/mermaid_puppy
/u/K_iwi
/u/theraindropsx46
/u/WhyRedTape
/u/leatherhoff
/u/goddamnroommate
/u/dnedna
/u/capture_the_excite
/u/whatupmyknitta
/u/b00mshaka
**Today please check in and tell us:**
**Did you accomplish your goals yesterday?**
**How is day four going? Any other goals today?**
**What is the most important reason you want to stop bingeing? We all probably have similar reasons, but I think it will be good to remind each other–and ourselves–what those are.**
GOOOO! :)
[Discussion] Your personal thinspo?
/u/HowToBeAsian25 [5'4 |113lbs |19.78 |-19 | F]
Created: Thu Oct 27 10:55:30 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59p2ud/your_personal_thinspo/
---
Slightly misleading title because I am talking literally.
I realized that everyone has this image that they hold of *themselves* in their head. Where they are at UGW and doing something. For some it's a vision of them walking down the hall of their new careers, thin and beautiful. For others it's a vision of themselves simply putting laundry away with their collarbones on fleek.
But we all have some sort of *idea* of ourselves. Whether it's how we feel, what we see in the mirror, or other people noticing us.
What's your personal thinsporation?
[Thinspo] Thinspo x-post from r/kpopfap
/u/HowToBeAsian25 [5'4 |113lbs |19.78 |-19 | F]
Created: Thu Oct 27 09:57:56 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59oqzm/thinspo_xpost_from_rkpopfap/
---
http://imgur.com/a/pTV37
[Rant/Rave] Silently flipping so much shit.
/u/smokesanddietcokes [Adipose Industries]
Created: Thu Oct 27 09:46:00 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59oomx/silently_flipping_so_much_shit/
---
Carry on from [this thread](https://www.reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59giyq/silently_flipping_my_shit/), but I promise not to make any more posts about this person. She's just been on my case ALL FUCKING DAY and I need to rant about it this ONE LAST TIME before I start ignoring her. For the record, she is the one who keeps messaging ME.
She's desperate for me to say that calories don't matter. She's desperate for me to say she can eat what she wants, and lose weight. She's desperate for a fucking magic wand.
First, she got upset about the water weight.
>"Is the 5lbs I've lost this week just water weight then?"
"Mostly, because you've been doing low carb with the shakes, but you'll have burned some fat too! You might regain a little water if you drink alcohol this weekend or eat more carbs at your party"
>"So I'll ruin it all??"
"No, not at all. As long as you don't overdo the calories, it'll only be water gain, and then gone within a week when you are back to your low carb eating plan"
>"What snacks can I have with the shakes to lose the water weight then?" (*She wants to have the shakes and a few snacks*)
"Leafy vegetables, chicken and other lean meats, eggs, nuts, cheese or even oil.. anything low in carbohydrates, but just watch your calories"
>"SO BORING FOOD?"
"... Sorry.."
Then her lunch.
>"Will a potato make me gain water weight?"
"It's a starchy vegetable, so it contains a few carbs, so you'll get a little water from it but not much at all - but you most likely wont be on a low carb today if you have one and then your shakes and other food"
>"My friend says having a potato for lunch wont make me gain water weight!"
"Not a lot, no. You'll burn through the glycogen before long"
>"Oh.. okay well I'll start low carb next week. I'll have a potato for lunch. Is it still healthy?"
"Yep! Potatoes are good for you!"
>"Okay".... *-few minutes later-* "I've ordered a pot of cheese to go with it."
Then she is asking the same questions over, and over, and over, and over again hoping for different answers.
>"I had butter on my potato is that okay?"
"Well yes it's fine, as long as you didn't have too many calories of it and end up eating a calorie surplus today. Butter is quite calorie dense though, so you might want to weigh out a moderate portion instead of having loads to make sure it isn't too many calories."
>"But I never counted calories when I thin when I was younger, why do I have to count them to be thin now?"
"Because you want to lose weight. If you naturally ate the right amount of calories when you were younger to be as thin as you like, then thats great. But right now you're eating enough to be a higher weight than you want, and so need to eat fewer"
>"I don't understand how the thin people at work can eat more than me and stay thin though! They don't count calories, they told me!"
"Because whether they realise it or not, the calories they consume are all balanced out and keep them at a healthy weight. They don't eat more than they burn, and so don't gain weight."
>"So.. why do I need to count calories? Can't I just eat healthy and stop when I'm full like they do?"
"...You can, but you said you've been doing that already.. and you're a higher weight than you want to be. I suggested counting calories because the calories you are eating right now are not leading you to being as low a weight as you want, and counting them means you can make sure you're not eating too many, and so can lose weight.."
>"My co-worker is thin and she had loads of butter on her potato!!"
FINE STUFF YOUR FUCKIN FACE WITH BUTTER THEN JESUS H FUCKING CHRIST I ACTUALLY DON'T GIVE A FUCKING SHIT WHETHER YOU THINK YOU'RE FAT OR NOT. I'M TRYING TO HELP. STOP MESSAGING ME. omg.
I am done.
Sorry I really needed to get this off my chest.
[Rant/Rave] Lowest weight for weeks and my scale didn't record it....
/u/bigeyessmallthighs
Created: Thu Oct 27 09:41:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59onob/lowest_weight_for_weeks_and_my_scale_didnt_record/
---
Got excited to see I'm 5 lbs down from when I started restricting in earnest again and my stupid "smart" WiFi scale didn't send the weight to my fitbit app! I entered it in manually but it's not the same...
[Tip] DAE notice that going to bed hungry results in weight loss?
/u/HowToBeAsian25 [5'4 |113lbs |19.78 |-19 | F]
Created: Thu Oct 27 09:26:59 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59okrh/dae_notice_that_going_to_bed_hungry_results_in/
---
I recently changed my eating habits to consume all my calories in the first half of the day which leaves me starved at night. But the hungrier I am when I go to bed, the more weight I lose in the morning.
This morning I hit my newest lowest weight btw! 111 lbs! Not ready to update flair just in case, but I feel like I'm on to something here!
[Discussion] Wintergirls
/u/c_marier [5'6"| 113.4| 18.3 | -13 | 22F]
Created: Thu Oct 27 09:17:42 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59oivd/wintergirls/
---
What are your opinions on this book? I've noticed that most people fall into one of two camps: the concerned "this is a step-by-step guide of how to be anorexic" and the people literally reading it for thinspo and using it as a step-by-step guide to anorexia.
But personally, I found the book to be more inspiration to recover than to relapse. I think Anderson does an excellent job of showing how isolating and all-consuming an eating disorder becomes. There is nothing romantic or alluring about Lia's loosening grip on reality and the way she loses her personality/individuality along each pound, gradually becoming nothing but a dictionary of calorie counts. Lia's thought process is so accurately described that I researched the author because I was convinced that she had to have experienced an eating disorder personally. I remember reading the book at sixteen and being horrified to see myself reflected in the pages - prior to reading I had assumed I was just watching my weight and that there was nothing disordered about my obsessive habits and strict food guidelines or exercise regimes. I have read it several times since high school and each time it is more heartbreaking than inspiring to starve. I can't believe that my younger self was this wintergirl and I can't believe I have been stuck for so long.
Also I found the writing style to be breathtakingly beautiful. The extended metaphors and dreamlike structure have influenced my own writing style tremendously. I love the poetic feel of the blur between reality and Lia's imagination.
Anyway, what are your thoughts? It always confuses me a bit when people talk about it being thinspo. I get that there is a whole chapter composed of "must not eat" but the depiction of anorexia is far from enticing and the ending paints recovery as the only option for survival. To me, the last pages are always depressing because I don't think I will ever reach the point where recovery is my only option. I think I will always float in the limbo of just barely underweight and "not really having enough of a problem" and I'll just be stuck and hungry and disgusted with my body for all of my life.
[Discussion] It's 11am here and I feel crazy, I feel alone, I'm fluctuating between 2 extremes. How is your day going? I just want to feel connected :(
/u/fckk [5'4| CW 120lbs | 20.60 | GW 115 | F]
Created: Thu Oct 27 09:10:45 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59ohgm/its_11am_here_and_i_feel_crazy_i_feel_alone_im/
---
I'm having one of those days where I woke up and deemed it a "binge" day. I planned to give in to every impulse, not think twice, get whatever I'm craving, etc. and "start new on Friday after you get this out of your system."
And then 30 minutes later I deemed it a, "Get a large coffee and coast through the day feeling light and successful and even LIGHTER tomorrow!"
And then 30 minutes later I managed to convince myself, "No, binge day."
And then 30 minutes later....you know.....D':
And it's not just a simple, "Bingeing", "Not Bingeing", "Bingeing", "Not bingeing"
It's all the fucking emotions associated with each decision. With the "bingeing" decision comes a type of excitement, dread, pressure, anxiety, defeat, disgust, euphoria. With the "restricting" decision comes RELIEF, motivation, superiority.
Yo I am RISING and CRASHING and RISING and CRASHING.
How the hell am I supposed to function on a productive level (in all OTHER areas of life) when my brain is ripping me constantly in opposite directions. It is insane.
Thanks for not making me feel alone...idk...how are you?!
EDIT: On especially bad days, I will give my BF a heads up that "ED is really loud in my head today and don't take my distance as personal" and he's totally supportive about it. Today he said, "Well you could NOT binge but ALSO NOT restrict today but allow yourself to eat more than usual." - LOLOLLOLOOLOLOLOL OKAY YEAH LEMME DO THAT! I'LL DO THAT! I HADN'T THOUGHT OF SUCH A SIMPLE SOLUTION :'D :'D :'D
He meant well so I said, "Thanks a lot for the support I appreciate it" but cringed inside at the naive innocence of his lil heart.
[Rant/Rave] I'm down to 102
/u/rainbowsunshinedust [5'5 | 105 | 17.68 | GW 95 | F]
Created: Thu Oct 27 08:58:44 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59of0s/im_down_to_102/
---
But I feel like death. I'm a heavy drinker. And I do so much stupid shit when I'm drunk. I hate it. I don't want to stop but I feel it on my body how badly it affects me. I just want to crawl in a hole. I'm a shitty girlfriend and friend and human. And I just hurt everywhere. I'm too young to feel this old you know? I can barely move but I need to keep walking so I can stay skinny. I'm killing myself. It's hard to admit but I know it.
[Help] how do you accurately measure your height?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Oct 27 08:54:45 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59oe9h/how_do_you_accurately_measure_your_height/
---
this morning I used a tape measure to measure myself and found that I'm 5'1.75....I had thought I was barely 5'3. just now, I measured with a yardstick and it said I'm 5'2.75! which is most accurate? I'm panicking, I need to know for an accurate bmi calculation....thank you lovelies <3
[Discussion] At how much weight loss...
/u/rizzle_riz [5'4' | CW:141 | 24.89 | -18 | F]
Created: Thu Oct 27 08:54:36 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59oe8g/at_how_much_weight_loss/
---
At how much weight loss did you decided it was time to start buying new clothes? I've only lost about 14lbs but a lot of my jeans and athletic gear are starting to fit really loose except for maybe one or two things. I'm afraid to go out and buy new stuff because the holidays are coming and I'm expecting the worse (meaning I might not be able to control myself with food or i'm afraid my family will realize i'm not eating and insist I eat more and I will comply because I would hate to worry anyone or cause suspicion) I don't really have much money, so I'm just curious to know when you guys started buying new clothes?
[Rant/Rave] I was wrong about my height!
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Oct 27 08:03:05 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59o4ih/i_was_wrong_about_my_height/
---
I'm so freaked out!! I haven't measured my height in a while but I thought I was about 5'3 at 95 lbs, making my BMI 16.8. I just measured myself and I'm actually 5'1, which means my bmi is 18.0. It shouldn't matter so much but it does, I'm fatter than I thought. at least I can change my goal weight; maybe this explains why I didn't look as thin as others with a 16.8 BMI.
[Rant/Rave] When your scale decides to troll you.
/u/EmpireStateBitch [5'4" | CW 120 | GW 115 | UGW 100 | F]
Created: Thu Oct 27 08:00:15 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59o3xs/when_your_scale_decides_to_troll_you/
---
Stepped on the scale and it said 119.8 and I was so excited, that set me days ahead of my projections! I started making some food, and wanted to weigh myself again to see that magical number, so I moved my scale away from the wall. 123. It had been resting on the trim of the wall the first time, and as a result it was almost 4lbs off. :(
[Goal] Had a dream I was eating nonstop... woke up and I hit my first goal!!
/u/melcatx
Created: Thu Oct 27 07:57:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59o3ib/had_a_dream_i_was_eating_nonstop_woke_up_and_i/
---
I dreamed last night that I was eating endless waffles covered in chocolate. I was grossed out with myself. When I woke up and realized I hadn't eaten anything....HAPPIEST GIRL IN THE WORLD!!!!
I posted a couple weeks back about my new goals, and my first goal was 113 lb by halloween. My goal of "halloween" was actually today, since it's the first night I am wearing my costume.
I did it!!!! SOO EXCITED! It is a new low weight for me as well. My next goal is 111 lb, because that is underweight for my height (5'5"). I have 2 weeks to hit it. :D
[Intro] New here, EDNOS for 16 years; faced some hard times, gained a lot of weight, so miserable
/u/PooTeeWeet5 [5'5 | CW: 148lb of fat | BMI: 25 | Goal: 118 | F]
Created: Thu Oct 27 07:40:02 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59o0cz/new_here_ednos_for_16_years_faced_some_hard_times/
---
Hi, everyone. I'm so glad that I thought to look for a subreddit for support this morning. I've really hit rock bottom weight/misery wise. As TL;DR as I can get for a brief recap and why I'm here:
* I have dealt with anorexia and b/p since I was about 15yrs old
* I'm 5'5, lowest weight has been 118 - and it was then that I was at my happiest
* For the past few years I was able to maintain an alright weight between 125 and 130lbs, but in February 2015 my grandmother - whom I was very close to - passed away.
* Six months after her death, my mother killed herself.
* Since then my b/ping and just bingeing has gotten out of control. I even started binge drinking twice a week for about six months - but I've cut that out. My weight, obviously, has sky rocketed.
I have been so unhappy for so many reasons - besides the loss of my grandmother and mother - I feel stuck in a boring job, stuck in a city etc. And instead of trying to gain some control over my life and really work on my horrible eating habits and get to that body I want so much . . . I've just been a fat ass. I'm scared to go out in public, I hardly have any clothes to wear, I talk so awful to myself all the time.
I'm DONE with that. I want to be happy and proud when I look in the mirror. I want to not b/p anymore. I want to feel light and in control of at least one thing in my life.
Thanks for reading all this. I'm scared of failure, but excited by the fact that I really can do this and be the person I want to be. Sending hugs to you all today!
[Help] I've been pretty much eating one meal a day and most times throwing up that one (binge) meal but still haven't lost any weight.
/u/vuuv95 [5'4 | CW: 105 | GW: 95 | BMI: 18.2 | F ]
Created: Thu Oct 27 07:33:11 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59nz80/ive_been_pretty_much_eating_one_meal_a_day_and/
---
I don't understand what's going on with my body. I often work or go to uni for a whole day and don't eat and when I do eat that day I tend to binge and then throw it up, or only have one small meal and then binge later on and throw it all up. I then snack on a few fruits. I still haven't lost weight and I'm really confused. Any insight?
[Goal] I'm on my fourth day of not binging!
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Oct 27 07:02:17 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59nu05/im_on_my_fourth_day_of_not_binging/
---
I'm so happy, even if the damage I've made during the last month has become clear. I've gained twelve bloody lbs, but at least it's stopping now. I miss being at my lowest, but I've done it before and I can do it again. I'm just so happy I'm done binging. I hope it never happens again, and I hope I'll stay strong.
I hope that all of you guys have your next couple of days, weeks, months, years, decades, binge-free. I've started smoking and drinking more water and tea, so that helps a lot. Now that you're here, what's your best tips at preventing binges? I need any help i can get, even if I've made it past the hardest days.
Update: IVE ALMOST MADE IT!
I ate about a pinky-worth of Syrup and some water with vinegar, but I'm confident that I'm not going to binge. It's 8:55 now, and I go to sleep at 10. I'm so happy, and I'm kinda proud to be honest. I can't wait until tomorrow, though.
Update2: ITS 6:30 AM ON FRIDAY AND I MADE IT!
[Discussion] Weekly Emotional Support October 27, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Thu Oct 27 06:08:05 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59nlu5/weekly_emotional_support_october_27_2016/
---
We're almost all dealing with quite stressful things outside of our eating disorders. Whether it be complicated relationships, friends, university, work or other mental illnesses like depression, anxiety or OCD, we all seem to be having a rougher time emotionally and mentally than the general population.
Use this thread to post about your problems or ask for advice concerning things other than EDs/ED behaviors.
**As always, follow the sub rules when reading or posting.**
*****
Weekly emotional well-being and support threads are posted every Thursday.
Have any questions or concerns? Comment below, or [PM the mods.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FproED)
[Discussion] Daily Food Diary! October 27, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Thu Oct 27 06:07:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59nlte/daily_food_diary_october_27_2016/
---
This is a daily food diary thread for October 27, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
[Goal] under 100lbs!
/u/k-w- [5'5 | CW 95 | F]
Created: Thu Oct 27 06:02:48 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59nl1i/under_100lbs/
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I weighed myself this morning. 99.4lbs! I'm so happy right now, I haven't been under 100 since seventh grade. peep these collarbones http://imgur.com/a/FVoOH
next stop is 90! I'm hoping more comes off my thighs ugh
[Discussion] DAE get tingling in their toes?
/u/Hamily [5'4.5" | 91 | 15.62 | -49 | F]
Created: Thu Oct 27 04:52:51 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59nc8u/dae_get_tingling_in_their_toes/
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Lately I've been fasting again and for the first time EVER, I'm getting the weirdest tingling sensations in my feet. It's not constant but comes in bursts.. it's almost like when your foot falls asleep and you move it, just without the numbness (and it's not really painful or anything).
Sigh. This probably means I need to cut it short but some insight would be fabulous regardless. Bummer.
[Rant/Rave] Back at it again...
/u/skullp00pl
Created: Thu Oct 27 04:31:05 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59n9v0/back_at_it_again/
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When I was younger I had disordered eating tendencies after years of being very overweight, and having it pointed out to me over and over.
Things got better, I was started to eat better and feel okay. In the past year or two I gained about 15lbs. It doesn't sound like much to most people, but lately it has made me feel disgusting.
I have been getting physically sick while eating food, or at the thought of eating food, because I don't want to be gross anymore. I want to be thin. I talk with friends quite a bit about food and how much I want to "eat an entire loaf of bread," etc. But just below the surface I am sick to my stomach at the thought. I don't deserve to even eat a piece, I am disgusting for even thinking of eating it.
An extremely close friend of mine is struggling as well, we don't talk about it but I know she does. Even knowing that I feel almost terrified trying to talk about it with her. I feel terrified to talk to anyone about it. And now I'm here, alone, dreading the next meal I'll have to eat and how disgusting it will make me.
[Meme/Humor] Duolingo supporting proED
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Oct 27 01:29:56 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59mrkr/duolingo_supporting_proed/
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http://i.imgur.com/xm7cvEn.png
[Rant/Rave] Y'know, I guess one good thing happens after I binge.
/u/Just_a_Paper_Bag [5'8" | F]
Created: Thu Oct 27 01:13:18 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59mpws/yknow_i_guess_one_good_thing_happens_after_i_binge/
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Since I'm always restricting, when I eat over my limit, I end up pooping it all out for a few hours.
And then still gain weight.
At least I get some quality time to play my dating sim games on my phone, while actively trying not to die.
[Rant/Rave] I may have a "normie" fasting buddy!
/u/Melusedek [173 | CW: 57.5 | GW ?? | 19.21/18.99 | F]
Created: Thu Oct 27 01:10:00 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59mpkf/i_may_have_a_normie_fasting_buddy/
---
There's a guy in the group of friends at university that I have a crush on and last night we went to a local museum to check out a Monet exhibit. We were getting drinks at our favorite bar and we were talking about trying to take care of ourselves while being stressed at school (ie less cigarettes, more running). And we got on the subject of fasting. It started as something that might be a problem but then we talked about the healthy benefits of fasting and what exactly goes on in your body (ketosis and such). We talked about fasting together and now I have a legit reason to fast and not get judged! Like, could this guy get any better?
I'M SO FUCKING EXCITED!!
[Meme/Humor] When someone I dislike starts to gain weight..
/u/Slippingonbananas [5'3 | 140 | ?? | 20 | F]
Created: Thu Oct 27 00:57:39 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59mo64/when_someone_i_dislike_starts_to_gain_weight/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/d1c2d96e2eed4334b6f62cf824385554?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=80d5a25bb00cdfe194be099c69490ba3
[Goal] Back under 120. Thank goodness.
/u/-lotophagi- [5'6" | 127lbs | 20 | -8lbs | F]
Created: Thu Oct 27 00:25:42 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59mknx/back_under_120_thank_goodness/
---
Mobile, no flare sorry
I had the worst month. People dying, fights, lost my job... all kinds of shit. I get scared sometimes when I dont log into this account for a long time and i dont immediately see our posts in my feed... like... scared they deleted us. I don't post thinspo on instagram, just memes bc im scared of getting reported. I need you guys. I can't talk to anyone else about this stuff.
I was over 120 a few days ago. It was bad. Binging and purging like crazy. Purged every day for like a week... idek how i lost weight again... maybe I was constipated and took a massive BM and that's how I lost weight. I gotta get back to 115. I'm 118.8 now. I feel gross.
I might save up to get my lips and cheeks filled so people won't comment how hollow I look. If your face looks healthy you can get away with saying it's just your metabolism.
Time to start restricting again. Time to get my life in order. Fuck.
[Discussion] Receiving snacks as gifts & controlling yourself around them?
/u/caithaa [5'7|122|19|one day at a time 🌼]
Created: Wed Oct 26 22:54:37 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59m9ln/receiving_snacks_as_gifts_controlling_yourself/
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I've been receiving a lot of junk food as gifts for big/little week in my sorority, and I usually just don't buy junk food because I have no control once it's in my house. The thing is, I can't throw away what my big has bought for me, because she's spent so much money and effort and love on them. It's like jars full of candy, bars and bars of chocolate, cookies and cake and popcorn and nutella. Halloween and big/little reveal is coming up, which means a loooot of pictures. I wanted to fast, but I have fresh-made really expensive vegan cookies & cake that will go bad if I don't eat them. It's not like I can treat myself either because I actually have been eating above my calories the whole week using exams as an excuse, and now I am SO FUCKED.
For people who live with their families/SOs, how do you control yourself from binging on shared food?
[Rant/Rave] Studying and starving
/u/aaanxiousthrowawayyy
Created: Wed Oct 26 22:28:23 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59m640/studying_and_starving/
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I'm in my school's 24 hour student center on lots of adderall (to focus and to make the hunger stop) on hour 13 of my fast and there's a student no more than 10 feet away scarfing down a ridiculous amount of McDonald's. This is my first legit relapse after kind of not being in recovery for three years and this is so hard I just really want a handful of fries but I know how much I'd hate myself for it. Only at 522 calories for today (huge breakfast that triggered the fast) and I worked out for over an hour because I want this so bad. I wish people would respect the no eating at the computers rule! Just going to blast music, take another bump, and focus on physics I guess.
[Rant/Rave] I feel like I messed up
/u/MeccaToast
Created: Wed Oct 26 21:39:47 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59lyya/i_feel_like_i_messed_up/
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I've been eating 500-800 a day for the past few weeks and dropped about 8lbs. Today I messed up. I was in public for most of the day during several mealtimes. I didn't eat as much as everyone else, I passed on the sweets and snacks but I couldn't refuse the horribly large lunch. I didnt eat al of it but still, its the end of he day and I've had about 1500 and no time to work out. I'll go back to my regular diet tomorrow and work out extra but right now my stomach hurts from all the food and I feel like I've undone all my hard work.
[Help] [help] Not sure what to do with my calorie intake. Opinions?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Oct 26 21:27:45 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59lx5w/help_not_sure_what_to_do_with_my_calorie_intake/
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[removed]
[Discussion] DAE's eating disorder cause them to spend way too much money on food?
/u/kpatable [5'9" | 127.4 | 18.5/18.8 | -19.6 | F]
Created: Wed Oct 26 21:25:39 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59lwt2/daes_eating_disorder_cause_them_to_spend_way_too/
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Recently I've been spending around $20 *a day* on food on average. I can barely afford half of that. By the end of the last several months, I've been having to get extra money from friends and family just to have any food at all. I'm really trying to do better. But it's a big problem right now. Can anyone else relate?
[Rant/Rave] Relationship going to shit right now, and I find myself wanting my ED to be out of control
/u/Sellout_Chef
Created: Wed Oct 26 21:06:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59ltrq/relationship_going_to_shit_right_now_and_i_find/
---
My workaholic spouse stopped caring about me, and I find myself WANTING my ED to get really, really bad. I'm still a "healthy" BMI, and I've lurked here and had dark thoughts about food, but never a full blown disorder. I actually opened a spread sheet to try and figure out how much nutrition I can get under 100 calories/day. I always wanted to cross the border into "just barely underweight", but now I wonder what I'd look like at 16 or 17 BMI. I feel like maybe if my stomach hurts, my heart won't. Or maybe if I get skinny enough, someone else will love me. Or maybe if I end up in the hospital, she'll pay attention to me again.
I don't know why I'm posting this. I think I just want to have a record of it. Thanks for being a safe place, and letting me not have to be "alone in the darkness".
[Goal] Five pounds and twelve inches of hair ago. My motivation to keep from binging through winter...
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Oct 26 20:50:30 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59lr96/five_pounds_and_twelve_inches_of_hair_ago_my/
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https://i.redd.it/hxr2i83blxtx.png
[Meme/Humor] when u in binge mode at a party and cant stop
/u/throwaway03199519 [glob]
Created: Wed Oct 26 20:42:27 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59lpxx/when_u_in_binge_mode_at_a_party_and_cant_stop/
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http://i.imgur.com/rNakVYB.gif
when u in binge mode at a party
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Oct 26 20:41:32 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59lpso/when_u_in_binge_mode_at_a_party/
---
http://i.imgur.com/rNakVYB.gif
[Help] Question of the Day.
/u/BlackGirlSteeze
Created: Wed Oct 26 20:40:30 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59lpmo/question_of_the_day/
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Bonespo or thinspo? Which do you like best?
[Rant/Rave] This video tears me up. Both crying and ripping me apart. more in comments.
/u/CowOffTheFarm [65" | 145 | 24.41 | - | F | GW 120]
Created: Wed Oct 26 20:37:42 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59lp7w/this_video_tears_me_up_both_crying_and_ripping_me/
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9-gTCXXh0cg
When u can't stop binging all da cake
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Oct 26 20:37:38 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59lp7h/when_u_cant_stop_binging_all_da_cake/
---
http://i.imgur.com/3ZgLXMs.jpg
[Discussion] Anyone else never stop moving?
/u/antkings [GW 105 | BMI 20.77 | -79lbs | Male 20]
Created: Wed Oct 26 20:11:26 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59lky2/anyone_else_never_stop_moving/
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When I'm not forced to sit down, I never stop walking around, even when I'm scrolling through my phone. I sit in class, in the car, and lay in bed to sleep and do homework. That makes me couch potato enough. I'm about 13000 steps per day now-- and I spend a LOT of time driving or in class. Anyone else have this insane compulsion to keep moving to burn calories?
Today 10/26 118 lbs
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Oct 26 20:03:18 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59ljn3/today_1026_118_lbs/
---
http://i.imgur.com/fuohu4J.jpg
[Help] If I throw it up, should I log it?
/u/antkings [GW 105 | BMI 20.77 | -79lbs | Male 20]
Created: Wed Oct 26 19:54:36 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59li5x/if_i_throw_it_up_should_i_log_it/
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Or should I log a portion of it maybe? I'm pretty sure it all comes out, but I never know and I am worried about not adding calories and eating something else...
[Discussion] Purge
/u/antkings [GW 105 | BMI 20.77 | -79lbs | Male 20]
Created: Wed Oct 26 19:36:41 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59lf6u/purge/
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After I eat anything my brain doesn't consider a safe food (protein bars, veggies and fruits), I end up purging within the next five minutes. When I put the food in my body, my stomach expands and I start to feel like a failure, and so heavy. When I throw it up, it's almost euphoric. Does anyone else kind of... love the feeling of purging?
(Mobile, no flair, sorry)
[Rant/Rave] so depressed i have no appetite yet still obsessing
/u/jrste310 [5 ft | 106 lb | 21.34 | -21.5| Female]
Created: Wed Oct 26 18:58:32 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59l8x9/so_depressed_i_have_no_appetite_yet_still/
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heart broken this weekend. cant stop thinking about what i did wrong. was it refusing to eat the bread at the first dinner? was it eating too much at the second? is it because i was so much fatter IRL then i look in pictures? is it because i went to the gym where other girls dont need to do that? Ive never felt so worthless and the thought of food repuleses me yet i want to want it to make me feel better. and also to drop weight so maybe someone else will ever be interested in me. fuck guys. this sucks
[Rant/Rave] Lowest weight...I'm scared and waiting for the other shoe to drop :/
/u/ifitmakesmehappy [5'5 | 125| -45| F]
Created: Wed Oct 26 18:25:07 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59l3dw/lowest_weightim_scared_and_waiting_for_the_other/
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I’m at the lowest weight I have ever been probably since I was 10 (I’m 21). I look great. Same old story: overweight as a kid, got into lifting at 18, started dieting when I was 19 [IIFYM], got into binging/running off calories. Binge phase. Cut Phase. Binge phase. Now i’m on my third cut/ time losing weight.
I could stop right now but...i don’t know if I want to. Or if i even can. I’m restricting a lot and it’s not even as hard as it was before? Maybe because of the EC stack, but even before, I used the EC stack and it seemed harder. Right now I’ve eaten 700 calories for today and I burned off 200. And I feel pretty full? I feel like I’ve developed anorexia (not anorexia nervosa, but anorexia, the medical condition).
Last time I ate anything “unhealthy” was a month ago, I ate at maintenance, I had beer and pizza and other stuff with my friend. But I got right back to the wagon and I told myself I could have some junk food after halloween. I wanted to make some slutty brownies to reward myself for sticking with the cut. Halloween is here and I don’t even want to eat anything that calorific. I even forgot I told myself that, but one of my friends reminded me. I’m half scared to (because calories) but also, I really just feel no need to. I keep putting off going to this new restaurant in town my friends want me to go to, I keep putting off eating pizza and ice cream (my favorite foods) even if they “fit my calories” and I don’t know if it’s because i’m scared to eat them and start another binge phase, or because I just have trained my body in the past 3 months to be full on “whole” foods….
I keep taking pictures of myself, almost as if I don’t capture how I look right now, I will never have photographic evidence when I become obese/overweight again (ugh, stfu brain). There’s not a picture of me I don’t like at this weight, my face looks amazing, my eyes look big, etc. But what if I rebound? Then again...part of me feels like this time is different. In my mind, I have gained a sense of self-control I don't think I had the last cuts I've done. I used to be the girl who wouldn't stop thinking about the ice cream in the freezer, who would beg her mom to stop bringing in junk food in the house because it's too tempting. Now, ice cream in the freezer can rot for all I care. I used to be the girl who couldn't say "no" to free food, now I happily decline (and now I do not ever eat something just because it pleases someone else/they offer me, fuck them tbh). I used to be the girl who just "couldn't throw away food, what a waste!" Now I throw away food all the time...It's empowering, in a sick, weird way.
I've almost convinced myself that I'll never ever be above 130 lbs, which is what my “low weight” used to be, up to 3 months ago lol. I keep telling myself maybe I should lose 10 more pounds as a sort of “buffer.” And also, I see girls who are so skinny and they’re fine! And healthy! It’s like I’ve been brainwashed that I need to have some extra fat on me to be healthy. I can have a lower BMI and still be healthy. Lots of people do it without even knowing! Right? I want to be one of those people, except with some muscle.
I’m just really ranting here. But I hope this is my body just learning to be full on nutritious foods...for the first time in my life. I keep telling myself that this will be maintainable. Eventually, I do plan to go on a maintenance phase. Maybe once I reach 115? That should be in 5-7 weeks. Ish. Which scares me so much. But yeah….anyone else relate?
[Intro] I'm sooo jealous but it keeps me motivated af
/u/PepsiMakSe
Created: Wed Oct 26 18:24:24 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59l39l/im_sooo_jealous_but_it_keeps_me_motivated_af/
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•Sorry I can't flair, on my mobile. Rant/Intro i'm guessing?•
So I'm meeting this group of friends in December. I've know them online for years and we finally decided to meet up.
Ofc there is this guy I've been crushing on soo bad. The thing is, one of our mutual friends (they know each other irl) is bringing his SO on the meet up. And heaven help me if she isn't some kind of beautiful, tiny, doll-like angel. She is such thinspo for me it's crazy. I may some day share that mythical creatures weight but if they don't invent a shrink ray for my massive slavic birthing hips then idk what I'm gonna do...
I fasted 3 days just thinking of what a difference our bodies are at -.- Currently 5'7 (173cm) and I weight 140ish? lbs (63kg). So I got 10kg till my first GW... The worst part is that other girls look nice at my stats and here I am a big ol' lard ball never thin enough, thanks ED brain!
*On a side note- This sub is amazing. You are all such an inspiration to me in the physical sence and the mental sence. Reading your posts really helps be feel like I'm not alone!
Alsoo...Hello and nice to meet all you lovely people! ^_^
[Other] body check 5'9" 120lb
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Oct 26 18:02:10 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59kzfo/body_check_59_120lb/
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http://imgur.com/a/bj4bl
[Discussion] BED/COE sufferers?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Oct 26 17:50:13 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59kxf7/bedcoe_sufferers/
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[deleted]
[Thinspo] Her channel is thinspo in action <3
/u/CowOffTheFarm [65" | 145 | 24.41 | - | F | GW 120]
Created: Wed Oct 26 17:46:51 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59kwvj/her_channel_is_thinspo_in_action_3/
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gfrhLjH18hU
[Rant/Rave] why can't i control myself?!!
/u/salt_skin [5'4" | CW 134lbs | BMI 23.45 | GW 90 lbs | F]
Created: Wed Oct 26 17:45:02 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59kwkz/why_cant_i_control_myself/
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i attempted to up my intake to see if that would control my urges to binge this week, but instead it just increased my appetite and made me binge even more. i wasn't hungry. in fact, i had felt sick because i was so full, but spent money i don't have, bought more food and ate anyway. i wanted to purge so badly, but my teeth are so weak rn. i'm taking laxatives, but that never feels as effective as just getting rid of it before my body really digests the food.
i feel disgusting. i literally hate myself. i just binged because i felt bad, but eating until i feel sick is not the way to deal with it. now my stomach hurts so much. i'm not even sure if it's because i'm stuffed or because i ate enough to feel full. i hate this.
[Help] SOS how do I stop thinking about food/stop wanting to eat this kit kat
/u/chocolatecoveredpugs [5'4| 118| 20.6 | -22lbs | F]
Created: Wed Oct 26 16:59:07 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59kok3/sos_how_do_i_stop_thinking_about_foodstop_wanting/
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So just came out of a review session for a exam tomorrow and successfully resisted the pizza they had (from my fave pizza place too not just shitty dominos) but the prof made everyone take candy because ~Halloween~ 😑. I'm super stressed about this midterm but can't stop thinking about the stupid fun size kit kat in my bag. How do I stop thinking about it??
[Meme/Humor] my italian textbook playing a cruel joke
/u/clamshells [5'7 | 115 | 18.0 | f]
Created: Wed Oct 26 16:20:27 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59khly/my_italian_textbook_playing_a_cruel_joke/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/972afa7fca374f7e8cae82fa66e8c9c9?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=ef289c6f1a60b0310c74a2234041f076
[Other] Can I just say how happy it's made me that SO many of us have commented about one part of their body they do like! 😘💘 I'm so proud of us all right now to be strong enough to focus on the positive 💝 what a sub full of beautiful people
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Oct 26 16:12:45 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59kg4p/can_i_just_say_how_happy_its_made_me_that_so_many/
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[deleted]
[Other] how do yall survive restricting to nothing but caffeinated drinks
/u/leatherhoff [5"3 | TOO MUCH | ftm]
Created: Wed Oct 26 14:49:24 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59jzoa/how_do_yall_survive_restricting_to_nothing_but/
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[removed]
[Discussion] Being diabetic isn't fun.
/u/wanskie [5'5 | cw: 135 | bmi: 22.5 | F]
Created: Wed Oct 26 13:26:02 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59jiqu/being_diabetic_isnt_fun/
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I binged so much the past few days on mostly sugary foods and I've been feeling so so sick. I'm only about 8 hours in and I feel like garbage. I'm diabetic so restricting is hard for me let alone fasting.
I have a live in child care job 3 days a week. I go over Wednesday night and get back on Saturday nights. I'll be there later this evening and I'm hoping I can at least do a water/broth fast until Sunday :(
Is anyone else diabetic? Have any tips?
[Discussion] DAE watch cooking videos while restricting/fasting?
/u/scaredalternate [5'5'' | 166 | GW 160 | UGW 120 | -54lbs | M]
Created: Wed Oct 26 13:03:14 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59je18/dae_watch_cooking_videos_while_restrictingfasting/
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I am currently 65 hours into my second fast of the last week. I fasted 100 hours which ended on Saturday and began this one Sunday after dinner (was with the boyfriend and had to pretend I was semi-normal).
It seems every time I am restricting to a very small intake or fasting I could spend hours watching cooking videos online, such as Buzzfeed, a cooking show, cookie decorating, ect. I'd never eat anything made on there but I like to imagine the tastes. In some way I imagine myself as a normal person being able to eat 1500-2000 calories without wanting to die after.
[Discussion] DAE ..
/u/tattoosandcoffeee [5'4 | GW 108 | -10 ]
Created: Wed Oct 26 12:40:42 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59j9dh/dae/
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Search model mayhem for hours for girls your height and goal weight? Are there any other platforms to do something like this? Ive used visual BMI and my body gallery and have seen every single image. Model mayhem is nice because you can see so many different body types with your height and weight and visualize yourself. side note- spending hours looking at this keeps me distracted from eating. haven't eat yet today and I'm planning to turn it into an all day fast! :):):)
[Rant/Rave] crying in the bathroom rn
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Oct 26 12:33:41 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59j7xv/crying_in_the_bathroom_rn/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] i'm really freaking out right now
/u/sunflowerfairy [4'11" | no goal weight; nothing will ever be good enough.]
Created: Wed Oct 26 12:11:25 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59j3a8/im_really_freaking_out_right_now/
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...because today i weighed myself for the first time in a few days and apparently i weigh 38.7 KILOS (85lbs) NOW?
I'VE NEVER BEEN AT SUCH A LOW WEIGHT BEFORE?? I'M JUST SO HAPPY RIGHT NOW BECAUSE I STOPPED B/PING FOR A WHILE AND DECIDED TO RESTRICT AND I'M SO GLAD IT PAID OFF.
so yeah. i'm kind of the happiest i've been in ages right now.
that's all. you can move on now. :)
[Goal] Thought my collarbones looked nice today
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Oct 26 11:54:37 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59izpz/thought_my_collarbones_looked_nice_today/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/cf0b1d15a36746cda08933330c8beb46?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=a18c8d4f704cf447ded0905e964d78f7
[Rant/Rave] Psych Hospital Victory
/u/prehsm [5'2 | CW: 125 | 22.9 | -15 | F]
Created: Wed Oct 26 11:46:37 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59iy14/psych_hospital_victory/
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I just needed to share this story with some people who can understand exactly how elated I am.
I just got home from an involuntary stay at the loony bin. Major depressive disorder, suicidal ideation, etc. SO MUCH FOOD. ALL THE TIME. I don't think my stomach got properly 100% empty the entire 72 hours I was there, because they gave us meals so often. My chart didn't have an ED diagnosis on it, really not sure why. But I knew if I restricted too hard they would definitely start looking closer at my medical history and probably try to keep me longer, right?
I came home 2 lbs lighter.
[Help] Gaining weight while sick?
/u/ms_tiny_tits [5'7'' | CW 121 | UWG 105 | 19.26 | -15 | F]
Created: Wed Oct 26 11:19:42 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59is86/gaining_weight_while_sick/
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Hi! So I've been having a serious cold since Thursday and when I tried taking my medicine as I always do, I puked it up. I can't even take an aspirin because my body refuses it and makes me puke it up.
I've been bedridden since Saturday and I've eaten around 900 kcals per day and when I stepped on the scale - I had gained 5 pounds?!
Does anyone know how this could've happened?
Have I just been miscalculating my calories?
[Goal] Anyone want to join me in committing to a binge-free week DAY THREE
/u/mmm_erythritol
Created: Wed Oct 26 11:17:13 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59irqf/anyone_want_to_join_me_in_committing_to_a/
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*"If it's important to you, you'll find a way–if not, you'll find an excuse."*
What up beautiful people? I hope you're all doing well and feeling awesome about your binge-free week.
Once again... calling all who have promised to be BINGE-FREE:
/u/ToffeeCup
/u/infinitegoldstyle
/u/shortchair
/u/neveraunicorn
/u/possiblycurious
/u/UnrequitedOrgasms
/u/InSkyLimitEra
/u/gastastic
/u/alliwantistogiveup
/u/somanyjellyrolls
/u/stormyeyed94
/u/enjupoint
/u/Kishin_
/u/lymfp
/u/What_u_callme
/u/Moonlight_bae
/u/neuro-fuzzy
/u/fckk
/u/qwertyldn
/u/throwaway0908123
/u/capture_the_excite
/u/mailmesnails
/u/fringeandbinge
/u/RetailSlaveNo1
/u/IAMABaguetteAMA
/u/tattoo987654321
/u/frameworkautoco
/u/chelowelXo
/u/DontMindMeJustBingin
/u/whyaremysockswet
/u/reggiesan
/u/Phantomsgf
/u/Hummingpenguin
/u/aerienne
/u/bannaberry
/u/DieMikrowelle
/u/takingheatfromthesun
/u/-kaneki-ken-
/u/SanguineSmiles
/u/mermaid_puppy
/u/K_iwi
/u/theraindropsx46
/u/WhyRedTape
/u/leatherhoff
/u/goddamnroommate
/u/dnedna
/u/capture_the_excite
/u/whatupmyknitta
I think I got everyone who asked to be added yesterday, but if you did ask and I missed you lmk!
**Please share:**
**How did yesterday go? Did you accomplish your goals?**
**How are you feeling on day three? Do you have any other goals besides being binge-free?**
**What is your favorite non food related stress reliever?**
Keep being awesome and supporting each other–today we will all remain binge-free!
[Help] Made a throwaway for this.
/u/Throwthatembrsmntawy
Created: Wed Oct 26 11:12:22 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59iqpc/made_a_throwaway_for_this/
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I recently binged myself into obesity. I can't make myself throw up at all and Oh god I've tried. But the thing is.. I can see my skin tear :( I was checking my already purple stretch marks and I have new tears due to my 5000 cal a day week. I just want to stop... so fucking bad why can't I stop.
[Rant/Rave] It arrived!!!
/u/neuro-fuzzy [5'6.3| CW: 115 ☹ | BMI: ??? | LW 98 | GW 108 | 20F]
Created: Wed Oct 26 11:09:26 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59iq47/it_arrived/
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https://imgur.com/a/Urq4g
[Goal] University students or young professionals, what are your goals when you reach your UGW?
/u/cheeekyslug [5'6" | BF: 26% | - 55lbs | 19/F]
Created: Wed Oct 26 10:45:02 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59ikxn/university_students_or_young_professionals_what/
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I need some positivity right now.
I've been really overwhelmed with school, I've lost sight in my goals and WHY I'm needing to lose weight.
I just want to be a dainty, chic full-stack developer or just a general software engineer. I've gotten an offer at a company next summer already and I just want to be the girl that everyone asks she's a software engineer??? All the girls I've made friends with at Google and Apple are so cute and tiny and fit, all of them dress very well (I'm guessing most due to their salary lol). They're the only women I aspire to be because not only are they really attractive they're also very intelligent. Also I aspire to those women who also deal with an ED and are working 9-5 jobs and still can manage to restrict and look perfect in their work clothes.
Anyone else have similar goals??
[Thinspo] Thinspo. 💕
/u/BlackGirlSteeze
Created: Wed Oct 26 10:25:35 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59igx0/thinspo/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/0405057becc545e3815be63198ae8a33?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=6badbde17247d0d83e467e3d9a6a719f
[Thinspo] Thinspo.
/u/BlackGirlSteeze
Created: Wed Oct 26 10:24:55 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59igs4/thinspo/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/6eafa09dfeea41cfb2323b225de098ce?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=95a281a45b2879a0e9c877d23e954af3
[Thinspo] Thinspo. 💕
/u/BlackGirlSteeze
Created: Wed Oct 26 10:24:07 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59igls/thinspo/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/22cd9ad98dcb427f9e506708c2ba2e98?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=0266d5fa14b1651838eec3d04f1b4d63
[Discussion] Daily Food Diary! October 26, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Wed Oct 26 10:02:48 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59ic2z/daily_food_diary_october_26_2016/
---
This is a daily food diary thread for October 26, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
[Thinspo] instead of studying i collected and am dumping some thinspo/ slight bonespo! have a good wednesday y'all
/u/ikillsouls [5' 2" | 106 | 19.4 | Ugw: 85 |19f]
Created: Wed Oct 26 09:33:30 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59i5x3/instead_of_studying_i_collected_and_am_dumping/
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http://imgur.com/a/cxUoe
[Intro] Yet another new lurker finally brave enough to come forward
/u/tattoosandcoffeee [5'4 | GW 108 | -10 ]
Created: Wed Oct 26 08:42:47 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59hvqd/yet_another_new_lurker_finally_brave_enough_to/
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Hello all :) The title says it all. I've been lurking for years. Ive always had tendencies since as far back as I can remember. I've always been TERRIFIED to gain weight..for reasons unknown to me because no one in my family is overweight or works out. Ive always been into working out and have always maintained a gym membership. I would skip classes and lunch and spend hours in the library at my high school looking up tiny girls I admired and dreamed I looked like them (one big idol being avril lavigne..I was OBSESSED :P) Then I finally did something about it when I got out of highschool. I ate once a day for 2-3 months, ran 5 miles a day, and got to 105 (LW) took photos and look at them everyday wishing to be that person again. I stepped away for a while convincing myself this is just "my" way of dieting. The years went by, got comfortable in a 8 year relationship and was fine until about two years ago. Started a new medicine, went vegetarian and gained the most weight I ever have in my life.( Ive always weighed the same since highschool fluctuating between 110-125 at 5'4) fought the thoughts, told myself I look fine this way..then one day snapped. Now at 28 years old..almost 29 I Freaked out, hated myself, got really depressed, anxiety to the max. Went to the dr and got back on anxiety meds and Adderall. started eating white meat again..and jumped back into my old habits of spending hours looking at thinspo..Reading posts every single day, working out every single day, fasting every day. and now have been successfully restricting/fasting for two months now. I just cant lie to myself anymore. I love restricting, its the only way I feel what I'm doing is working. I love feeling light and airy and that IM in control. my initial goal weight is 108 (Lowest healthy weight) ultimate goal is to get to 100 and see how I look. Goal is to get as small as possible but still look healthy ..then Ill start lifting weights at the gym to gain about 5lbs of muscle for definition to put me at 105. I apologize for this being so long.
You are all so inspirational. Its nice to finally meet you all and I'm excited for what's to come :)
[Help] I struggled with bulimia for over 20 years before I became a felon and had nothing left to lose...
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Oct 26 08:35:27 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59huat/i_struggled_with_bulimia_for_over_20_years_before/
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http://www.instructables.com/id/Daily-Life-Skills/
[Discussion] I thought maybe it would be a nice idea for everyone to share what one bit of their body they DO like? Positive vibes and love all round 💕❤️🎀
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Oct 26 08:26:51 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59hsmg/i_thought_maybe_it_would_be_a_nice_idea_for/
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[deleted]
[Meme/Humor] Don't know if there's anything funnier
/u/rainbowsunshinedust [5'5 | 105 | 17.68 | GW 95 | F]
Created: Wed Oct 26 08:18:35 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59hr39/dont_know_if_theres_anything_funnier/
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Than being someone with an ed that likes to bake and cook. I feel like one of those feeder people almost lmao. Like I make food for the entire family and I just sit at the table sipping my whiskey with an empty plate. Atleast I can live vicariously through them.
[Goal] Silly NSV
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Oct 26 08:16:55 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59hqt2/silly_nsv/
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I was on a full bus this morning on my way to work - and sitting next to someone, I wasn't smashed in. Not only that? I had room next to me.
Small victories, right?
[Rant/Rave] high-restriction dilemma
/u/pumpkinpieface [5'6 | 102.4 | 16.3 |]
Created: Wed Oct 26 07:54:39 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59hmo8/highrestriction_dilemma/
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DAE hate themselves when they eat 1000+ to stave off binging and have energy?
i so wish i could fast or eat 400 cal a day but i have to have energy to work and study and not think about food 24/7... i used to restrict heavy in high school but life was kinda chill no responsibilites then...
I still lose weight but it's so slow. i guess it's more sustainable???
[Rant/Rave] friend with an ed
/u/dnedna [5'7" | 116 | 18.15 | GW:110 | F]
Created: Wed Oct 26 07:23:10 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59hh9q/friend_with_an_ed/
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I have a friend with an ED who has recently lost a LOT of weight and knows about mine (which I’m supposedly in quasi-recovery from where I’m losing weight but at higher cal levels) say to me that she’s officially underweight while laughing. Fuck her. I’m dropping my fucking calories. Sitting here shaking and trying to calm myself from a full blown panic because I'm in a library :(
[Discussion] does anybody know of any low cal cooking sauces?
/u/namelessgia
Created: Wed Oct 26 06:57:22 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59hct0/does_anybody_know_of_any_low_cal_cooking_sauces/
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so i just got some fairly low calorie vegetarian mince and am reaaaally eager to try it as i've only heard good things, the problem is i have no idea what to have with it! any suggestions are welcome, it doesn't even have to be a sauce, i'm just looking for something that isn't ridiculously high in calories :)
[Rant/Rave] [rave] I did it!!
/u/thinkthinlythrowaway
Created: Wed Oct 26 06:55:34 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59hciu/rave_i_did_it/
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I completed a 24 hour fast and I'm on hour 35 and it's amazing. On hour 23 I felt on top of the world and then I went to bed. Now I'm up and ready for a long ass day (which I should be able to not eat) and then it's my boyfriends birthday so I may have to have something for dinner. But I'll do something hella small.
I feel amazing, although the shakes are starting to come so if anyone knows how to calm down that it would be great.
Ugh you guys are what inspired me and so amazing and I'm so proud of myself right now this is the one thing I'm not epically failing at 😍
[Rant/Rave] I love this sub c:
/u/kpatable [5'9" | 127.4 | 18.5/18.8 | -19.6 | F]
Created: Wed Oct 26 06:48:53 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59hbh7/i_love_this_sub_c/
---
I've been on several support subs for various issues, but proED is by far the most supportive and thoughtful community out of all of them. One thing in particular that I love is that we celebrate ALL successes, whether it's not binging for a day or fitting into a child size shirt. We don't discriminate with our upvotes based on stupid, judgmental shit, and I so love that. One of the other subs I used to frequent would only upvote pictures if the poster was pretty, even if the success had nothing to do with that. But we upvote/value every success, no matter how big or small the thigh gap is, or whatever :P and I just really love that. I'm so grateful for this community. Thank you, everyone~~~
[Rant/Rave] Just feeling shit today
/u/xtinytoadx [5'4" | 78 | 13.65 | F]
Created: Wed Oct 26 06:46:43 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59hb4w/just_feeling_shit_today/
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So basically I b/p for 4 days straight last week, but I finally normalized my intake on Monday. ($200 down the drain- fuck me, right?)
I ended up b/p again yesterday and when I got home at 10pm I ate over 4,000 calories worth of bread, cheese, chocolate, and chips. I wasn't able to purge it at all so now I just feel like total shit from last night. I've only had 2 hours of sleep and I've been averaging 4. I feel absolutely disgusting and a fat piece of shit, like I'll never get over binging, I'm chronically sleep deprived, I feel empty and lonely and just blegh. I don't know. Hell. My mother's been continuing to make comments about my size and how dysfunctional I am, so that's great (sarcasm). I have so much university work I've no idea how to keep up with this wretched mess that is me.
I'm trying to fast for most of today but I have a feeling that's not going to go down well.
I guess I'm just looking for comfort and someone to tell me I'll be okay. Maybe list some things that help you cope with urges to binge? I don't know. Sorry. I feel annoying for posting here and expecting something.
Edit: Just adding some more feels here since I don't really have other places to dump it. I haven't hung out with anyone for several years now. I haven't laughed in months. I'm unable to hold a conversation. I eat exorbitant amounts of food and dump it all down the toilet since I'm a useless dumb wreck of a human. I feel so empty and I have no drive in my life. I can't pay attention in class and I'm always exhausted and don't have time for sleep. A dumb, gluttonous sloth.
[Discussion] Way To Go Wednesday October 26, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Wed Oct 26 06:03:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59h4nh/way_to_go_wednesday_october_26_2016/
---
This is the weekly achievement thread for October 26, 2016.
This weekly thread is to spotlight those achievements you feel don't necessarily warrant their own post, but you'd like to celebrate all the same. This is not limited to specifically ED-related goals; share anything you are happy about having done or accomplished recently!
*****
Achievement threads are posted every Wednesday.
Have any questions or concerns? Comment below, or [PM the mods.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FproED)
[Thinspo] Throwback to my lowest this summer..
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Oct 26 05:34:02 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59h0qv/throwback_to_my_lowest_this_summer/
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http://imgur.com/oTRafwT
[Rant/Rave] I fainted and now nobody will leave me f*ck alone about my food intake.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Oct 26 04:31:31 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59gtco/i_fainted_and_now_nobody_will_leave_me_fck_alone/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] Silently flipping my shit.
/u/smokesanddietcokes [Adipose Industries]
Created: Wed Oct 26 02:53:05 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59giyq/silently_flipping_my_shit/
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So a friend of mine is talking about her weight loss efforts. She wants to lose 30lbs.
She started the Cambridge Diet this Monday. Basically, she has three nutrition shakes a day totalling around 500kcal, and that's it for the diet plan.
She's been asking my advice, whether she can afford to have extra snacks besides the shakes because she gets so hungry. I have tried to explain to her that yes she can, up to a certain calorie amount, and that another aim of the diet is to be low carb and go into ketosis and the benefits of that.. but she refuses to get any of it. She seemingly refuses to understand the impact calories have on weight loss. She seemed to refuse to understand why having a snack of cucumber and ham was okay (apparently a 'nutritionist' that works for the diet scheme and sold her the shakes told her that eating cucumber *specifically* would knock her out of ketosis... CUCUMBER), but a ham and cheese pastry and a cookie wasn't such a good idea. She seems to want to think the shakes she has 3x a day are magic and will melt fat away.
In the end, I gave up, and left it as 'as long as your snack is under 500kcal, it's okay. She went and had the ham and cheese pastry and cookie (She came back and said she 'assumed' it was under 500kcal for the lot because it 'seemed small').
She's now messaging me about how she's weighed herself, and she's lost 4lbs since Sunday night. She's excited. I decide against telling her - *again* - about water weight and it's impact on the scale. I don't feel I can burst her bubble this morning. I just tell her well done.
She's now telling me that she's going out to a restaurant and then to the pub for a lot of alcohol this weekend because 'she wont regain all of that in one night!'
She is causing me the biggest eye twitch/tic in the history of the fuckin universe guys I swear to god.
[Rant/Rave] Just left my sorority's Taco Night...
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Oct 25 22:47:32 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59fr74/just_left_my_sororitys_taco_night/
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[deleted]
[Discussion] Sleep and hunger?
/u/GrammarNaughtsy [5'3" | 102 | GW: 98 | F]
Created: Tue Oct 25 22:34:12 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59fpec/sleep_and_hunger/
---
I've read that having either a fucked up sleep schedule or having less than optimal amounts of sleep decreases leptin and makes you hungrier. I'm finding that my cravings and appetite *have* amped up as a result of my consistent inability to sleep lately.
Does anyone else find this is true or have any sleep related ED experiences?
[Help] IN BODY CONFUSION
/u/jrste310 [5 ft | 106 lb | 21.34 | -21.5| Female]
Created: Tue Oct 25 22:12:31 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59fmbi/in_body_confusion/
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my pbf is 17.5! Finally below normal (goal 16)
but my BMI is still 21.6 (too high)
my inches went up by .25
but my %bf went down from last time.
IM SO CONFUSED CAN SOMEONE EXPLAIN. this is fucking with my head h core. my nurtritionist is now "v worried" but my bmi still says FAT. now i trust nothing
Was starting to think I was onto something lol :) :) :)))))))
/u/soma-h
Created: Tue Oct 25 22:10:51 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59fm2y/was_starting_to_think_i_was_onto_something_lol/
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[removed]
When you say you're skipping lunch and your colleagues are fine with it...
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Oct 25 22:08:50 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59flr6/when_you_say_youre_skipping_lunch_and_your/
---
[deleted]
[Discussion] How long did it take you to get to really increase momentum on your shrinking your body?
/u/hunterxgreen [5'4'' | too much | ditto | -22 | F | ]
Created: Tue Oct 25 21:15:17 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59fdt5/how_long_did_it_take_you_to_get_to_really/
---
I'm down 20 lbs, but I've been plateuing for ages so I was just wondering how long it took you to see things really moving and get close to your goal weight? Like when you feel like you got into a routine and could notice your body really responding to what you were doing? hope that makes sense. also if anyone has any plateua busting ideas that would be great. I've thought about fasting but the last time I fasted I ended up in the ER so I can't do that for a while bc my parents are watching. IF is about all I can do. Thanks x
[Rant/Rave] Tfw you finally feel like working out and your elliptical breaks
/u/lightfeathers [5'4" | CW 112 | GW 95 | F]
Created: Tue Oct 25 20:54:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59falt/tfw_you_finally_feel_like_working_out_and_your/
---
😤😤😤
[Thinspo] thinspo video/amazing song
/u/gin-and-lemon [🐝 5'1"| cw: 150lbs | bmi: 29 | -15lbs | f]
Created: Tue Oct 25 20:41:36 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59f8ed/thinspo_videoamazing_song/
---
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gxDvUsZsWDo
[Rant/Rave] When all you've eaten is a few baby carrots and you're still screwed
/u/pungentthrowaway [5'1" | CW: 154 | -13 | F]
Created: Tue Oct 25 20:35:10 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59f7cv/when_all_youve_eaten_is_a_few_baby_carrots_and/
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Completely useless rant ahead -
Where I live and among my social group hanging out = drinking heavily in bars. Alcohol is what? The only drug that involves a ton of excessive calories? And it's also the only drug that is socially acceptable. I usually bring a vaporizer out with me but it's still hard to be out at bars for 4+ hours and keep myself high the whole time with a vaporizer. So I drink. And I keep drinking. And I feel sick because all I ate was 3 carrot sticks earlier and then all this alcohol. I feel empty. I feel hungry. But I needed to not be sober so I did what everyone was doing and drank and drank and drank until I very easily hit 1k calories of alcohol alone *even though* I'm sticking mostly to vodka sodas.
Again, this is pointless. I'm just really bitter because it feels like I damn near fasted and had it unfairly stolen from me even though it was my own stupid decisions that stole it from me. I wish our societal drug of choice was anything else.
[Thinspo] Thinspo.
/u/BlackGirlSteeze
Created: Tue Oct 25 20:20:17 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59f4y0/thinspo/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/981fb958425d4f88addc0fbcae1d7055?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=45c99e100720f5de7b7de936df1869dc
[Goal] down 8 lbs in two weeks!
/u/salt_skin [5'4" | CW 134lbs | BMI 23.45 | GW 90 lbs | F]
Created: Tue Oct 25 20:02:21 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59f1yz/down_8_lbs_in_two_weeks/
---
i went from 142 two weeks ago 134. i just found out today at the doctor's office since i no longer have a scale! while i'm super excited, i went shopping for a halloween costume today and my stomach and legs still managed to look enormous in all them. i feel like despite losing weight, my proportions make me look even fatter now than i was when i actually weighed more, but i can't tell if that's dysmorphia talking. but still, i'm happy that i am losing. i felt like i wasn't, so to find that i'm 8 lbs down is pretty exciting for me.
[Rant/Rave] Having an ED in the Education field (Rant)
/u/sprinkle1997 [5'2 | CW 129 GW 100 | -25 lbs | 19F]
Created: Tue Oct 25 19:34:15 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59ex6y/having_an_ed_in_the_education_field_rant/
---
On mobile, cannot flair!
I feel sick in the head because I'm constantly comparing my meal portions to the kids' at lunch. These kids are six years old and I'm eating less than them. They always say my lunch is so small and laugh at me but it makes me feel good. I eat less than a child. I'm so disgusted with myself.
How can I stay on track for restricting and what are some tricks to burn extra cals?
/u/wavvvybaby
Created: Tue Oct 25 19:33:07 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59ex06/how_can_i_stay_on_track_for_restricting_and_what/
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[removed]
[Goal] So happy with myself
/u/notcomingback000
Created: Tue Oct 25 18:30:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59emhz/so_happy_with_myself/
---
Monday I managed 550 cal and Tuesday 525
[Discussion] Any audio book/YouTube recommendations..?
/u/ICouldNeverSpell
Created: Tue Oct 25 17:55:19 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59eg66/any_audio_bookyoutube_recommendations/
---
So I get urges at work to eat sugar/snacks when I really don't want to. It's that my attention is crashing or I'm bored/upset. As I work at a desk I can't really pull out some thinspo but I can listen (not really watch) YouTube and audiobooks for help. Any suggestions? :)
[Discussion] What are your favorite hot drinks?
/u/ChubbyBunny8 [5'2" | 135 | 25.58 | -15 | F]
Created: Tue Oct 25 16:44:53 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59e3dm/what_are_your_favorite_hot_drinks/
---
I'm always freezing in my office and I like to have a hot drink for lunch to warm me up. I drink a lot of green tea, and I've recently started drinking diet Swiss Miss hot chocolate. Any other recommendations?
[Help] I'm not sure if this applies.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Oct 25 16:41:12 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59e2qj/im_not_sure_if_this_applies/
---
[deleted]
[Discussion] Fasting vs low cal restriction impact on metabolism?
/u/whiimsii
Created: Tue Oct 25 16:38:55 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59e2ao/fasting_vs_low_cal_restriction_impact_on/
---
Hi beautiful people,
First of all I'll have to apologise for the lack of flair here, I'm on the app 😑.
Now that that's out of the way... The topic of discussion I'd like to bring up today is something I'm very interested in which I haven't really been able to find any credible sources of information about.
I keep stumbling upon people online who suggest that low cal restriction ("starvation") is infinitely more detrimental to one's metabolism than complete abstinence from food for a period of time (during which one enters ketosis and feeds off of their own fat resources) which is then followed by refeed.
I'm not sure if this is complete and utter bullshit or truth, and if so, why! Lol. I'm pretty well educated on what happens to the body during fasting but I'm not sure why it would differ from restriction in terms of impact on the BMR?
I know many of you guys are super into health and nutrition or even work in a relevant field so I figured someone might have a clue?? Does restriction really fuck with your metabolism more than fasting does?
(So sorry if someone's asked this question before btw. I didn't know, I promise!)
[Rant/Rave] Arctic Zero ❤️❤️❤️
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Oct 25 16:26:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59dzxk/arctic_zero/
---
[deleted]
[Other] My fitness pal friends?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Oct 25 16:24:06 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59dzjb/my_fitness_pal_friends/
---
[deleted]
[Meme/Humor] So, I was playing Cards Against Humanity with my family last night and...
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Oct 25 16:18:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59dyjt/so_i_was_playing_cards_against_humanity_with_my/
---
[deleted]
[Other] I'm having 4000 calories today
/u/DenyMyHunger [5'7"| Fat! | UGW:112| F]
Created: Tue Oct 25 15:34:56 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59dpzs/im_having_4000_calories_today/
---
It's my birthday and I'm gonna get sooooo drunk.
I hope you're all doing well on your journeys (sp? ) lovelies since I'm so busy fucking up :)
[Rant/Rave] I can't go to the store
/u/rainbowsunshinedust [5'5 | 105 | 17.68 | GW 95 | F]
Created: Tue Oct 25 15:08:19 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59dksc/i_cant_go_to_the_store/
---
Cause I'm kinda tipsy and I lost my fucking laxatives! I had a whole bunch left I thought. It really sucks but I guess I'll sip on laxative tea for now and hope it works quickly. I look 6 months pregnant and I haven't even binged!
[Other] I think of my eating disorder as a pencil
/u/yikes_dot_com [5'6 | 111 | 17.9 | F]
Created: Tue Oct 25 14:14:55 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59d9yr/i_think_of_my_eating_disorder_as_a_pencil/
---
This semester, during a period of heavy restriction, the pencil faced me in reverse and began to erase my body and soul alike. I dropped ten pounds in five weeks and lost any semblance of self, abandoned all of my hobbies and interests, and became completely isolated: a moving body, nothing more.
Then, last week when I went home for fall break, the pencil turned around sharply and began stabbing me with its evil point. It made me shove food into my face for no reason, every hour of every day until my whole body hurt, undoing all progress, rewriting crudely and jaggedly over what it had erased.
I wish I could control the pencil, could grab hold of it and write my own story.
[Intro] My ephedrine came! (Intro)
/u/Gastrick [Height 5'4"| CW 120 | GW 100 | F]
Created: Tue Oct 25 13:56:00 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59d5vv/my_ephedrine_came_intro/
---
Saw you guys talking about bronkaid (not available in Canada) and sleuthed my way into finding pure 8mg ephedrine tablets from a supplement/body building shoppe.
I haven't had these since my last go around with ED!
I had to share in my delight... Not much else is going well these days. I've taken up fasting again in the hopes of regaining my once-svelt bod, so I'll need the energy boost.
I'm so glad we're all here to support one another- back in 'my day'(10 or so years ago) it was all on livejournal, not my favourite platform.
Think thin, all!
(Sorry no flair, I'm on mobile)
[Discussion] Has anyone else gained weight in really weird places post-recovery/treatment?
/u/star-of-morning [5'1" | no clue | went to treatment | send help]
Created: Tue Oct 25 13:49:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59d4pa/has_anyone_else_gained_weight_in_really_weird/
---
So as some of you may know, I went to residential treatment in June. I had to restore some weight and I've gained even more after being discharged. I'm absolutely disgusted with my body, I don't feel like I'm in *my* body (if that makes any sense), yada yada yada, I could go on.
I don't know how much I weigh but I know I'm nowhere near my highest weight ever. But I've gained weight in SUCH strange places. Even at my highest weight I never had fat in certain places, but I do now. For example, strange thigh and back fat I never had before.
Has this happened to any of you who've had to be weight restored? Is there any science behind this or am I just being crazy?
[Discussion] Let's talk hotsauce
/u/ssshield [5'10| 178 | 26.2 | -15 | M]
Created: Tue Oct 25 13:45:01 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59d3qb/lets_talk_hotsauce/
---
I wanted to share that I've been having some really great results with using extremely spicy hotsauce on my food. Just a teaspoon of it on veggies or anything really and not only does it numb my stomach for an hour or two, but it cleans out my GI track pretty thoroughly as well. There's almost no calories and only a little bit of salt to really think about.
Here are my current go-to's:
[Time's up reaper sauce](http://www.pepperpalace.com/TIME-S-UP-TOMATO-BLEND-REAPER-HOT-SAUCE-p/k450.htm)
[Dave's ghost pepper sauce](https://www.amazon.com/Daves-Ghost-Pepper-Jolokia-Sauce/dp/B001PQTYN2?th=1)
Anyone else using hot sauce or similar for weight loss / appetite suppression?
[Rant/Rave] Three binge days in a row, followed by first purge
/u/-kaneki-ken- [5'7" | CW 129 | GW 120 | 20.2 | 22F]
Created: Tue Oct 25 13:20:31 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59cypm/three_binge_days_in_a_row_followed_by_first_purge/
---
Holy shit, you guys.
Yesterday, a boy bought me a huge breakfast and a huge dinner, after which I came home and finished out the day with a needlessly massive and frantic binge. But wait! It gets *WAY FUCKING WORSE!*
Today at work I consumed ~1200 cals in kitchen leftovers, came home, weighed in at 133. I was laying in my bed sobbing, why, why, why am I doing this, when suddenly I stopped, went into the bathroom, and purged until my nose and throat started bleeding. I said I wouldn't; I haven't purged in a really long time, but it seemed like the only way to gain back some small piece of control over my own consumption. I popped blood vessels in my eyes again, currently trying to figure out how to minimize that before going to see friends later...
I know I didn't get even half of the binge back up. I know I'm still sitting on at least 1000 calories of carbs and bullshit, and I know I'm going to have to restrict for days to feel okay again. I know this is all stupid and not helpful at all. I know I need to get back below 130 as soon as humanly possible. What I don't know is why I'm suddenly letting this happen. This summer I wouldn't even lick a spoon without logging the calories. Eating an uber-strict 1200 cals a day and running 3 miles a day was fucking cake. I had iron will. So where the fuck did it go?? Why was I already about to cry at work today eating that second leftover donut? Why didn't I just throw it the fuck away?? Who is this new person in my body, and how do I make her go away before it's too late and I'm back to being a fat shit?
[Help] I need a hug and a lot of advice.
/u/edthrowaway77 [5'8'' | 118 | 17.75| F]
Created: Tue Oct 25 13:04:47 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59cvml/i_need_a_hug_and_a_lot_of_advice/
---
I've had a diagnosed ED for 8 years (anorexia with purging) and I've been struggling a lot recently. All I want to do is restrict and exercise but I've lost enough weight that my doctors are monitoring me really closely and I need to at least maintain to stay in school.
The problem is I still restrict during the day but I end up bingeing and purging at night because I panic about how I need to keep my weight up/have a brief flash of recovery motivation and "challenge" myself to eat a little extra, which triggers me to binge (usually subjective binges, rarely more than 400-500 calories) and purge.
I know that my health is declining, which freaks me out and I need to get myself to a stable place but I don't want to tell my doctor, dietician or therapist about how often I'm purging because they already think that I need inpatient (or an ER) and don't want them to push it.
I have never dealt with bingeing and I'm completely lost. I need to be eating enough to at least maintain/maybe gain a pound or 2 to get people off of my back but I'm scared to eat for fear that I'll lose control.
I feel so guilty all of the time; I've had anorexia since I was 12 so sadly, it is a part of my identity and all of this stuffing my face is making me feel like a faker.
[Discussion] Does anybody else get frustrated by the body-positivity movement?
/u/caseydoeswords [5'0 | c:135 | cgw:120 | 25f]
Created: Tue Oct 25 12:46:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59cryl/does_anybody_else_get_frustrated_by_the/
---
Idk if this is a discussion or a rant/rave, but it's just kind of bugging me today.
So there was a Buzzfeed article about the average American woman being a size 16-18, and it's full of pictures of larger women in bikinis and revealing clothing, etc. I'm all for these women feeling confident in their skin and stuff, and part of me is like "yeah, I guess self-love is super important no matter what size you are," but another part of me is just really, really frustrated and upset with posts like this.
I guess I feel like this movement *can be* a positive thing, but mostly that it just glorifies unhealthy lifestyles, and promotes this image of overweight women as "normal." When I was at my heaviest weight, I often used the body positive movement to disguise my crippling lack of discipline and self-control, and I allowed it to enable me to be extremely unhealthy. It's easier to be part of a "movement" than to look at yourself and say "hey, you really have no self-control and it's disgusting, you need to take a hard look at the way you live and get some shit straightened out."
I might not be the picture of a healthy lifestyle now, either, but... I guess things like this are almost triggering for me now. I just hate that it's literally everywhere, and is normalizing unhealthy lifestyle choices under the guise of being self-acceptance. Idk. How do you guys feel about this kind of thing? Surely I'm not the only one who is deeply bothered by it.
[Rant/Rave] dysmorphia
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Oct 25 12:22:21 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59cn0p/dysmorphia/
---
[deleted]
[Goal] Don't really post pictures of my legs so.. 118lbs
/u/frailraven [5'10 | CW 117 | LW 115 | F20]
Created: Tue Oct 25 12:18:39 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59cm8y/dont_really_post_pictures_of_my_legs_so_118lbs/
---
http://i.imgur.com/Az1b4MX.jpg
[Discussion] Lost periods, high weight?
/u/Pipoen [5'9" | 131 | 19.35 | -30 | =^u^= ]
Created: Tue Oct 25 11:44:35 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59ceys/lost_periods_high_weight/
---
Hi hi!
I lost my period about 2 months ago and at the time I was 145 or so. I've done countless tests and even saw an OBGYN to get one officially done. She seemed exceptionally indifferent when I told her I had lost it.
I'm 129-133 depending on day now. That puts my BMI somewhere between 19-20. I still feel way too large to have lost it this early.
Any one experience this?
[Goal] I like my arms and this shirt shows them off, I'm still at 150lbs.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Oct 25 11:23:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59cap9/i_like_my_arms_and_this_shirt_shows_them_off_im/
---
https://imgur.com/gallery/ywhWc
[Goal] Anyone want to join me in committing to a binge-free week DAY TWO
/u/mmm_erythritol
Created: Tue Oct 25 10:52:04 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59c3y1/anyone_want_to_join_me_in_committing_to_a/
---
Hey guys! First off I am so grateful and overwhelmed by the huge response I received on yesterday's post. I'm sorry I didn't manage to reply to everyone but I have read all of your comments. This is such a kind and supportive community–I know that with each other's help, we can all make it through this week (and beyond) BINGE FREE!
Today I want to share with you all a book that I feel offers a unique and extremely helpful perspective on binge-eating and b&p–Brain Over Binge by Kathryn Hansen. Reading this hasn't cured my bingeing (yet??), but it has given me a lot of hope and tools to avoid binges–and I want you all to have that too. So, [here](https://drive.google.com/file/d/0B1wx6KxI1RBLdW5nZlpsMmtYdTA/edit?pref=2&pli=1) is a link to a google drive file with the complete book.
Now, calling all who joined in committing to a binge free week!
/u/ToffeeCup
/u/infinitegoldstyle
/u/shortchair
/u/neveraunicorn
/u/possiblycurious
/u/UnrequitedOrgasms
/u/InSkyLimitEra
/u/gastastic
/u/alliwantistogiveup
/u/somanyjellyrolls
/u/stormyeyed94
/u/enjupoint
/u/Kishin_
/u/lymfp
/u/What_u_callme
/u/Moonlight_bae
/u/neuro-fuzzy
/u/fckk
/u/qwertyldn
/u/throwaway0908123
/u/capture_the_excite
/u/mailmesnails
/u/fringeandbinge
/u/RetailSlaveNo1
/u/IAMABaguetteAMA
/u/tattoo987654321
/u/frameworkautoco
/u/chelowelXo
/u/DontMindMeJustBingin
/u/whyaremysockswet
/u/reggiesan
/u/Phantomsgf
/u/Hummingpenguin
/u/aerienne
/u/bannaberry
Please check in with us in the comments below!
How did your day go yesterday? Did you accomplish your goals?
How are you doing today? Do you have any goals other than being binge-free on day 2?
How have you successfully stopped a binge in the past?
Thanks everyone!
P.S. If you would like to be added to the list for future posts, let me know. I will try my best to keep track of everyone!
[Discussion] Weed and cravings, how do you deal?
/u/unecessarilymargie
Created: Tue Oct 25 10:24:55 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59byde/weed_and_cravings_how_do_you_deal/
---
I am having MAJOR issues with the munchies. I'm always good with eating way under my daily limit until about 11pm when I smoke some weed then it's suddenly a binge fest. How do you guys manage the munchies?
[Rant/Rave] Goal day stolen from me
/u/Weazin_the_Ju-uice
Created: Tue Oct 25 10:24:19 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59by95/goal_day_stolen_from_me/
---
I feel so betrayed. I know my scale is an inanimate object and it shouldn't be able to make me feel like this...but it still did. It's broken and I am freaking out about how long it has been malfunctioning.
I have a schedule for weigh-ins and measurements. Measure once a week, weigh daily in the am within the same 1 hour window. Every Tuesday is my goal weigh-in day. I calculate what weight I should be next Tuesday and enter it in my calander. Then I have a spot where I enter my actual weight when I get to that day.
Today was supposed to be a really happy awesome day! I had already "met" my projected weight goal 2 days ago. I always step on the scale a few times to make sure. Today everytime I stepped on the scale it was different by 1-3lbs!!
I changed the battery and recalibrated it...but still. It's different everytime. Now I have missed out on my hour time frame to weigh myself. That means my goal for next Tuesday wont be good enough because I don't know my weight today. So it will take me 2 weeks to get back on track.
I love weekly weigh-in day. Sigh. Now its been stripped from me. I guess I always have measurement Sunday. :(
I can trust my intake log and know I am losing weight...but it's so sad that my happiness is going to be put off because of this stupid scale. I want to know exactly how much weight I have lost! I want to be in complete control!
Guess I'm going to spend the morning scale shopping.
[Discussion] "An eating disorder is the body speaking when the voice is not heard" - what is your body trying to say?
/u/PM_ME_ABOUT_UR_WEEK
Created: Tue Oct 25 10:21:07 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59bxl8/an_eating_disorder_is_the_body_speaking_when_the/
---
https://www.reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59bxl8/an_eating_disorder_is_the_body_speaking_when_the/
[Discussion] Thank you to this subreddit
/u/Gabi_Cat [5'5" | CW:125 | BMI: 20.7 | -75 lbs | F]
Created: Tue Oct 25 10:12:17 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59bvsc/thank_you_to_this_subreddit/
---
I am constantly struggling with an undiagnosed ED. My main doctor and my therapist aren't concerned even though I've reached out for help. Since my BMI is still in the healthy range they make it seem like it's all in my head... and my parents will forever be in denial... But this place is a safe place where I can reach out and relate to others. I just wanted to thank everyone and I hope one day we are able to love ourselves (haha right?)
[Rant/Rave] You know you have a problem when you're excited you're to depressed to eat.
/u/Navelpudding [5' 6" | 180 | -70 | F]
Created: Tue Oct 25 10:11:23 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59bvlm/you_know_you_have_a_problem_when_youre_excited/
---
Seriously I feel a bit better when I realize my stomach has that "no food today or I'll vomit" feel.
[Discussion] Xanax + bronkaid?
/u/fairyspice [5'3" | 112 | 19.8 | GW 105 | F]
Created: Tue Oct 25 10:08:43 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59bv24/xanax_bronkaid/
---
Would it be counterproductive to take xanax with bronkaid? I'm thinking about starting to take bronkaid but don't want to waste my money/time if they would just cancel each other out. Anyone have experience with it?
[Discussion] Daily Food Diary! October 25, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Tue Oct 25 10:02:32 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59btpm/daily_food_diary_october_25_2016/
---
This is a daily food diary thread for October 25, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
[Other] today's 2cal dinner :-) [other]
/u/leatherhoff [5"3 | TOO MUCH | ftm]
Created: Tue Oct 25 09:55:53 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59bsbm/todays_2cal_dinner_other/
---
http://imgur.com/zwD42RY
[Meme/Humor] This thread is helping me fast! Lol
/u/whatupmyknitta [5'2'' | 165lbs | 30 | -12lbs| female]
Created: Tue Oct 25 09:43:50 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59bpx4/this_thread_is_helping_me_fast_lol/
---
https://np.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/598qrb/health_inspectors_of_reddit_whats_the_worst/
[Rant/Rave] Fighting the urge to binge so bad right now
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Oct 25 09:24:02 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59blzk/fighting_the_urge_to_binge_so_bad_right_now/
---
[deleted]
[Meme/Humor] This thread is helping me fast! Lol
/u/whatupmyknitta [5'2'' | 165lbs | 30 | -12lbs| female]
Created: Tue Oct 25 09:13:51 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59bjwo/this_thread_is_helping_me_fast_lol/
---
https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/598qrb/health_inspectors_of_reddit_whats_the_worst/
[Discussion] leaving treament
/u/survi_ving
Created: Tue Oct 25 08:55:51 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59bgdy/leaving_treament/
---
[removed]
[Other] Reminder: You can easily be 20lbs lighter by 1 Jan ❤
/u/High_as_red [5'4 | F]
Created: Tue Oct 25 08:42:10 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59bdof/reminder_you_can_easily_be_20lbs_lighter_by_1_jan/
---
https://www.reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59bdof/reminder_you_can_easily_be_20lbs_lighter_by_1_jan/
[Discussion] How would everyone feel about a clothing exchange or thread? I have a lot of petites to get rid of.
/u/gastastic [5'1 | 118.4 | 26F]
Created: Tue Oct 25 08:25:37 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59bais/how_would_everyone_feel_about_a_clothing_exchange/
---
I will reply to this main thread with various sizes. Reply to your paticular size with photos for people to see what you're offering. PMs can be exchanged for details if interested in purchase.
[Discussion] Liquid Fast, thoughts and plans
/u/hazelconner [5'4" | 174.5 | 33.2% BF | -15.5 | X/F]
Created: Tue Oct 25 08:17:41 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59b90a/liquid_fast_thoughts_and_plans/
---
Well I haven't lost much weight at all this month so I'm going to try to liquid fast until Friday when Halloween celebrations kick in and I gotta look normal.
My thoughts to stay as healthy as possible are that I'll allow myself puréed vegetable soups, protein shakes, and maybe (maybe!) fresh juices, along with coffee, tea, diet soda, and water.
I think this is easily sustainable for 3 days and I can keep some nutrition in as well.
Anyone have recommendations or recipes?
[Intro] I guess it's time to do an introduction then
/u/bustyblondefromimgur [starting BMI: 38 - current BMI: 23.7 - goal BMI: 20]
Created: Tue Oct 25 08:12:56 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59b82l/i_guess_its_time_to_do_an_introduction_then/
---
I, like plenty of people, have semi-lurked here for a long time. I started out pretty heavy and lost 100 pounds starting with the ketogenic diet and slipping into PSMF and then something else. I try to stay under 400 cal a day but I haven't been holding on as well lately. I don't really know what to put in this, I just feel a break coming on and I don't know where else I would post on this
[Discussion] DAE get sick while fasting?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Oct 25 08:03:50 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59b6ej/dae_get_sick_while_fasting/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] So I'm joining y'all who are fasting today...
/u/daeboo [5ft1/80lbs]
Created: Tue Oct 25 07:52:00 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59b489/so_im_joining_yall_who_are_fasting_today/
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Got in fight with boyfriend, boyfriend yelled a lot and called me ugly, etc. I bawled like the little child I am.
I don't have the dignity to leave him, don't have friends to complain to. I just have food and my stupid food problems and my self harm. Its not even his fault since I've known from the start that he doesn't find me attractive.
At this point fasting isn't even about weight loss, its just me throwing in the towel and screaming fuck it, I'm dizzy and tired but fuck food, I'm not touching that shit.
Thanks to everyone who read my rant. I hope all you on this sub have a lovely day <3
[Rant/Rave] i tried to stop from bingeing and purging today after a stressful interview
/u/kinaadman [5'1" | SW 210 | CW 110 | GW: 90 | F]
Created: Tue Oct 25 07:40:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59b2d9/i_tried_to_stop_from_bingeing_and_purging_today/
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but i couldn't and i don't know why i have no self-control
i was doing really well. last night was such a good night and i fucking hate myself for this
[Meme/Humor] When your mind jumps to calories by default
/u/nauticaI [5'3.5" | BMI 19.8 | F]
Created: Tue Oct 25 07:28:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59b087/when_your_mind_jumps_to_calories_by_default/
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My BF got a bunch of free snacks from a brand he's doing some marketing for. He pulled them out of his bag and laid them out and said, "How much do you think one of these is?"
I guessed, "I don't know, maybe 250?" And gave him a look like *Am I right?*, expecting him to check the label for calories.
He said, "I'm not sure how much they cost. I'll have to check next time I see them on the shelf."
...lol. He totally meant price and thought I was saying $2.50. Classic?
[Other] body check 10/25 - gap - 5'7, 116-118?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Oct 25 07:26:26 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59azut/body_check_1025_gap_57_116118/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/87f2eb705cc34f2f9ecfab116c299cd8?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=e3ef0f6934cc97cff5ab897053557a20
[Other] I'm getting a new scale, because I can't trust mine anymore. I'm preparing for my first weigh-in on November 1st.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Oct 25 07:26:04 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59azsy/im_getting_a_new_scale_because_i_cant_trust_mine/
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https://i.redd.it/l6ks7zk1gmtx.png
[Rant/Rave] DAE consistently wake up hungry after a binge?
/u/Alexa1p [5'5'' | 110 | 18 | -10.7 | F]
Created: Tue Oct 25 07:21:35 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59az0e/dae_consistently_wake_up_hungry_after_a_binge/
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On one hand, I sort of actually enjoy feeling hungry, so it's almost a pleasant feeling. But then again, I usually enjoy feeling hungry because it makes me feel thin and beautiful. I'm actually trying to do homework right now, and if my stomach could shut the fuck up so I could actually focus on something other than how much of a failure I am, that'd be great.
[Discussion] Self-care and Beauty Q+A October 25, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Tue Oct 25 06:02:53 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59amta/selfcare_and_beauty_qa_october_25_2016/
---
Eating disorders are real, complex, and devastating conditions that can have serious consequences for physical health. Use this thread to discuss harm reduction and beauty tips, plus suggestions on how to build back up the physical self before and after engaging in disordered behaviors.
Please be wary of false advice and information. Be sure to research the facts before taking anyone's advice, no matter who they are. Remember that diagnosing members is unacceptable. **Anyone looking for medical guidance should seek the opinion of a medically licensed professional.**
*****
Self-care and beauty threads are posted every Tuesday.
Have any questions or concerns? Comment below, or [PM the mods.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FproED)
[Rant/Rave] Is this my life now?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Oct 25 05:51:29 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59al8a/is_this_my_life_now/
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[deleted]
[Intro] Introduction?
/u/nicfrae [5'7 | CW151 | BMI24 | GW<116 | -54lbs | F23]
Created: Tue Oct 25 05:20:53 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59ahi0/introduction/
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First I would like to say I've lurked for a while I'm glad to have found this safe space of like minded individuals where I (hopefully) won't be judged.
Secondly, I don't know if I have an eating disorder. I know it doesn't need to be diagnosed to be true, but then I feel like at the weight I am, I would be laughed at if I said I might have one.
I live in Japan right now and whilst my eating has become progressively more and more disordered and obsessive, I haven't sought help because of this. I don't have many friends but I haven't mentioned any of this to them in detail because one, I feel like secretly inside they would think that me losing weight is the right thing to do no matter how I do it, and secondly I kind of like the secrecy. I do recognise this as disordered thinking but I also don't want to stop.
Honestly I get a kick out of saying I've eaten something when I - and ONLY I - know that I haven't. Its this secret just for me, it's my thing, and I'm doing an amazing job at it so far.
I've been overweight most of my life, never been thin, and I've lost the majority of my weight over the last 2 years. I think because most people were familiar with the heavier me, they see me now as a fine healthy weight (because compared to the me before it's such a vast improvement), so I'm being told not to lose anymore weight and honestly, it's frustrating. I'm still fat. I'm just smaller now, and smaller than a lot of those people. I want to think that it stems from worry and that they're coming from a good place, but then I also feel like they're either jealous or just want to sabotage me. I don't know.
I'm more and more obsessive about calories with each day, I stick to around 800 as a general rule but I walk at a fast pace everywhere in vain effort to burn more, so my overall intake is slightly less. I understand that this isn't healthy.
But for me, the alternative is so much worse.
I flat out refuse to be fat any longer. It is the thing that never leaves me. I can wear make up, I can wear nice clothes. I'm still fat. I don't want to be.
For me, it's as simple as that.
I tried it the healthy way, and it doesn't cut it anymore.
For me, I just want this one thing to be able to control. That is what I want to tell the people telling me not to restrict - if nothing else, let me have this.
If there is anyone else who has similar feelings or at least understands me, I would appreciate their support.
I know that I don't belong here, not yet, but I don't receive acceptance anywhere else.
[Meme/Humor] Saw this on /r/MeanJokes
/u/Melusedek [173 | CW: 57.5 | GW ?? | 19.21/18.99 | F]
Created: Tue Oct 25 04:06:33 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59a8xa/saw_this_on_rmeanjokes/
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Why do bulimics love KFC?
It comes with a bucket.
😂😭
When are the best times to eat?
/u/reallynuggie
Created: Tue Oct 25 02:11:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/599xf1/when_are_the_best_times_to_eat/
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[removed]
[Rant/Rave] [Rant/Rave] Hopefully I won't fail for the rest of the week
/u/voidnasp [153cm | CW 59kg | 26.44 | -8kg | F]
Created: Tue Oct 25 00:38:01 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/599nqp/rantrave_hopefully_i_wont_fail_for_the_rest_of/
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Yesterday was a hard day. I wanted to restrict so much, but I gave up pretty easily and ate some salty charcuterie for the first time in months. I gave up and didn't watch my sodium intake and felt so guilty about it. It wasn't a binge but it wasn't the right thing to do when I am so close to my first goal of 60kg... I freaked out this morning before weighing myself, but thank God I didn't gain too much. But I feel so guilty for being this weak.
But I have a kind of concert-trip week starting today. I won't have to go home for lunch time. I'll be drinking tons of water at work. I prepared everything in little plastic bags so I know exactly how much I eat. If I don't fuck up and end up buying some food I will eat less than 500kcal per day from today to Sunday. No temptations. No one to watch what I eat. No one to judge me for having my little portions in plastic bags. No one will know I didn't eat before taking up the train or before the concerts.
I have planned everything. It can't go wrong. I'll be fine. Everything will be fine.
[Meme/Humor] There's an add-on for Chrome that randomly generates named cat characters when you open a new tab. I got this one... Seems about right!
/u/smokesanddietcokes [Adipose Industries]
Created: Tue Oct 25 00:08:39 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/599kfx/theres_an_addon_for_chrome_that_randomly/
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http://tabbycats.club/h9yjzi
[Help] Best diet pills without caffeine
/u/aaanxiousthrowawayyy
Created: Mon Oct 24 23:20:26 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/599epo/best_diet_pills_without_caffeine/
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[removed]
[Rant/Rave] what the fuck is wrong with me
/u/TinyTinyCleverCDR [156 cm | 50.8 kg | 21.73 | -7.7 kg | F]
Created: Mon Oct 24 23:17:56 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/599eez/what_the_fuck_is_wrong_with_me/
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I was doing so well. 1 month self-harm free, a couple weeks without binging. Then today I talked to my mom and I just *lost it.*
I don't know why I answered the phone. (Well, I do. I was hoping it'd be my stepdad. He's nice. But I don't know why I didn't hang up when it wasn't him.) It was a mess. She spent the whole conversation detailing why she was *entitled* to me-- saying that I was her best friend before CPS got involved (when I was like 8 lmao. congrats on being such a repulsive human that you have to threaten children to be friends with you), and that the only reason I'm not close to her any more is because living away from her "conditioned me to lies." Never mind the drugs and the violence-- the only reason CPS ever got involved was to *insult her personally.*
I had nothing to say. I just stayed silent until she tired herself out talking. Then I burned the shit out of my shoulder and cried for two hours. Then I ate an entire fucking gallon of ice cream and almost an entire jar of peanut butter.
I hate her. I hate myself. I hate that she thinks she can just bulldoze her own story over the truth, like if she lies to me enough I'll just magically forget all the abuse and we'll be BFFs. I hate how greedy and entitled she is-- she wants to have her cake and eat it too. She wants to do drugs and terrorize me my whole life and then turn around and have a relationship again after she's alienated her current rotation of tweaker frienemies.
And when I binge I can't help but see her same greed in me. I'm a fucking hypocrite. I just wanna keep burning and burning until no part of me resembles her any more.
sorry, this is kinda tl;dr and not really related. i just needed to vent and didn't know where else to go.
[Help] This has been the worst week of my life and I've lost all friends to talk to
/u/stinkyoldcheese [5'5 | 114 | 19.19 | -61 lbs | F]
Created: Mon Oct 24 22:46:14 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/599acj/this_has_been_the_worst_week_of_my_life_and_ive/
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I don't post on here all that often but I'm here all the time and i just want someone to talk to. I realized how abusive my "relationship" is as I'm sitting here with ice on my face covered in bruises where he choked me and dragged me by my neck two nights ago. I thought I was going to die and i wish he would have just finished the job. He also punched me three times and my back is aching and sore and bruised now. He left for the night and he still thinks the fight was my fault because I woke him up after he told me to wake him up so he could finish some work... and we aren't even a real couple he still loves his ex it is complete bull so why don't I just leave? Well...
On top of that I lost both of my jobs in two days and I'm broke and didn't get the job I thought I was starting today...
And I'm sorry I'm just really lost and I have been bingeing like crazy i ate at least 12 pop tarts and my mouth hurts too bad to purge. But not too much to stuff my face like a cow?!?! I'm a failure. And I lost my dog and best friend last July and I just want someone to hug I have never felt more alone in my life someone please tell me it gets easier ... tell me it gets better... I don't see any light at the end of this tunnel
Edit : he also repeatedly called me ugly and skinny fat and "crackhead skinny" followed by just calling me "fat"?!? Wha??
[Intro] Here we go....... Again..
/u/Humongo7 [5'2 | CW 186.2 | GW 102 | Female blimp]
Created: Mon Oct 24 22:16:26 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59961s/here_we_go_again/
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[removed]
[Other] one of the inflamatory essays by jenny holzer, far too accurate and a little bit beautiful
/u/bumblers [5'8"| 125.3 | -20 | F]
Created: Mon Oct 24 22:13:32 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5995na/one_of_the_inflamatory_essays_by_jenny_holzer_far/
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https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/736x/f2/19/9d/f2199d04a38155daff0b814734f09287.jpg
[Other] Binge control (on mobile can't flair)
/u/zarnaah [5'5 | 163 | 27.44 | -22lbs | female]
Created: Mon Oct 24 21:45:31 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5991n3/binge_control_on_mobile_cant_flair/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/b08f83e418f5434bbe5dafd32b384914?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=3e8a19974938e0280c7f8dd4f052cbcb
[Help] Need help to start again.
/u/starkravingsober
Created: Mon Oct 24 21:37:48 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5990g7/need_help_to_start_again/
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[removed]
[Thinspo] Daily thinspo.
/u/BlackGirlSteeze
Created: Mon Oct 24 21:32:39 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/598zn0/daily_thinspo/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/e391cbf2073d4b91b64f188cd7cae327?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=72b5223a30a83214ff644aff5871ffc2
[Rant/Rave] I lost my month long streak on MFP but it's okay
/u/nukemily [5'2 | 129 | 23.59 | -4 | 15F]
Created: Mon Oct 24 21:29:48 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/598z6o/i_lost_my_month_long_streak_on_mfp_but_its_okay/
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I went off my antidepressants and ended up trying to commit suicide, my parents took me to the hospital. ended up in a mental hospital. and there was no phone for me for 5 days. it was the worst 5 days of my life. the food was awful!! i couldn't eat any of the meals and ended up snacking from the vending machines so much. gained 7 pounds back, but I think I might do okay guys, it's been two and a half weeks and I'm four down :)
[Other] TFW
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Oct 24 21:05:24 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/598v9h/tfw/
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[deleted]
[Goal] 10/24 119lbs
/u/frailraven [5'10 | CW 117 | LW 115 | F20]
Created: Mon Oct 24 20:45:05 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/598rwv/1024_119lbs/
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http://i.imgur.com/lixUIi2.jpg
[Help] Those with emetophobia/fear of vomit, have you ever successfully purged?
/u/setniessesed [5'11.5" | CW: 141 GW: 130 | 18.71 | -18lbs | 20/F]
Created: Mon Oct 24 20:37:41 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/598qqb/those_with_emetophobiafear_of_vomit_have_you_ever/
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Lately whenever I binge I spend around half an hour over the toilet trying my best to gag myself and throw up. But it usually doesn't get anything up, and when I do feel something, I instinctively panic and swallow instantly. This is so fucking annoying to be honest. I don't know why I'm so goddamn afraid of it. When I hear other people gag or retch I get absolutely terrified and start cold sweating and shaking all over. I literally haven't vomited since 3rd grade, and I'm a junior in college. Why am I like this? I just want to get rid of all the shit I throw in my stomach. I even like gagging and coughing, and tearing up from it; it's stress relieving. I know there are a huge amount of awful health risks associated with purging by vomiting, but honestly at this point I don't give a shit about my health, I'm just trying to keep myself out of the living hell that was going on when I weighed more and constantly hated myself.
Anyone with emetophobia. Have you successfully overcame it and made yourself vomit?
I hate living like this. I just want to be able to have a normal relationship with food. But I have no idea how.
[Discussion] [Discussion] Going to an ED support group tomorrow...
/u/archersarrows [5'6" | 115 | 18.6 | F]
Created: Mon Oct 24 20:12:11 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/598mfv/discussion_going_to_an_ed_support_group_tomorrow/
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A recovery group. I do not want to recover. I do not want to change. I'm going literally because my boyfriend worries about my current weight, and the fact that I keep losing even though he watches me eat.
Not only that, but I've got this pathological fear that I'm going to roll up to the group and be surrounded by actual skinny people. And that there'll be food, ha.
[Discussion] Anyone else think they look huge from the front?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Oct 24 19:35:14 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/598gcy/anyone_else_think_they_look_huge_from_the_front/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] Is this a fuckin joke?
/u/xcris19x [5'3 | FATFATFAT | Fat | F| UGW: 100/105]
Created: Mon Oct 24 19:16:17 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/598d3k/is_this_a_fuckin_joke/
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http://imgur.com/Um3ZClw
[Intro] Lurker, finally introducing myself
/u/DontMindMeJustBingin [183cm/6'0" | CW 60kg/132lbs | BMI 17.92 | GW 58kg/128lbs| Male]
Created: Mon Oct 24 18:46:35 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/598808/lurker_finally_introducing_myself/
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Hello!
Instant warning: long intro, feel free to skip to a TL;DR at the end.
Been a lurker on this subreddit for a while now (Since May?) and decided to finally create an account. So it's time to do an intro! Basic stats are in my flair, I'm currently living in London, UK (I noticed a few others from here) and I'm 21.
Never really had a problem with food until I developed severe depression (and suicidal thoughts) after failing to pass some exams. After flunking the exams, I decided to lose weight as a means to take back control of my situation. I started at a weight of 83kg/183lbs in September and dropped down to 70kg/154lbs by new year, and whilst I was pleased with the weight loss I still didn't find it to be enough. I decided to go down to 68kg. This didn't prove to be much of a challenge as I was cycling nearly every day and got to my goal after a couple of weeks. Around this time I started to get comments from family that I look sick (BMI 20.3, seriously???). I decided not to listen to anyone after finding out about /r/fatlogic . I decided to go down to 65kg thinking that that would be the final goal. Of course I was wrong, after lingering at 65kg for a while I decided 62kg... then the same things at that weight and I dropped down to 60kg. At this time I was basically being forced to eat far far far too much food for any human. It was easily 3000kcal. Result being that I would fast whenever possible and throw away food. I would make sure that I always ate in front of other family members and made sure they remembered that I ate (eg. Saying how great something tastes). Of course none of this really helped too much and I got up to about 63kg. I finally moved away from my parents in September (weight 62kg) after retaking and luckily passing the exams, leaving the scale behind.
After some financial woes, some pretty good fasts and some unfortunately huge binges I got a scale and after a binge I weighed 59.8kg today.I'm hoping that the scale will relieve some pressure I had and stop me from over eating. I could have sworn I had gained by my reflection in the mirror (but clothes were noticeably looser).
I also noticed a trend: when I binge I get lazy and unproductive. I detest that. That was the old me. This is one the main reasons why I am currently not seeking to improve my eating habits as I fear it would change me to the person I once was and hate.
My disordered eating has noticably changed me, to be frank for the better: I don't eat unhealthy food (I binge on healthy food mainly), I'm more productive, I keep everything spotless and organised, I try to be more sociable (however I'm finding it extremely difficult what with my financial situation and ALL social events revolving around food, alcohol), I don't drink any alcohol unless I have to. I've picked up running, walk over 85k steps a week, cycle at least half an hour a day. Stay on top of coursework and generally try to have a positive attitude towards life.
Of course it's also had a negative impact: I avoid a lot of healthy food purely for the calorie content: nuts, fruit, juice, dairy milk (I eat muesli and drink coffee so it stacks up). I also get ill a lot more easily and stay ill for longer. I'm very very cold and it isn't even December/January yet. I tend to also waste a lot of food too: I only cook for myself and I can't get through most produce by the time it goes out of date.
Very sorry for such a long intro, I've been meaning to introduce myself for a while and all of you are so kind! This is honestly my favourite subreddit.
TL;DR
Long time lurker, started losing weight as a means to gain back control. My ED has changed me mostly for the better and I feel like I can't recover in fear of reverting back to my old lazy and unproductive self.
[Goal] NSV - I never thought I'd actually be able to wear these! But I can now, comfortably.
/u/morose_adipose [5'2 | 90 lbs | 17.05 | F]
Created: Mon Oct 24 18:26:03 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5984gh/nsv_i_never_thought_id_actually_be_able_to_wear/
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https://i.redd.it/fj82a0jjlitx.jpg
can you see a difference in my face here? 30lb difference.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Oct 24 18:03:13 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5980b5/can_you_see_a_difference_in_my_face_here_30lb/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/27301c33f13c4a01acd686c27f033716?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=e804ee5c14cab07fb8302c071251a71d
[Intro] 90 DAYS IN - STATS (scroll to bottom for explanation) - also, nice to meet you guys!
/u/light_hollow_space [5'4 | CW: 159 | BMI 27 | -36 | F | GW: 125 | LW: 99 | HW: 198]
Created: Mon Oct 24 16:51:45 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/597ndd/90_days_in_stats_scroll_to_bottom_for_explanation/
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https://imgur.com/a/VXi6V
this card i bought really speaks to me
/u/girlinamber [5'4 | too much | not enough | f]
Created: Mon Oct 24 16:47:24 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/597mjx/this_card_i_bought_really_speaks_to_me/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/cff4146e5d984c4f80c39d2bcac6e433?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=7349bb32c4e5c613bf9ede0bbedf3090
[Intro] This is me around my Lowest Weight - scroll to bottom of photos for explanation
/u/light_hollow_space [5'4 | CW: 159 | BMI 27 | -36 | F | GW: 125 | LW: 99 | HW: 198]
Created: Mon Oct 24 16:23:41 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/597i5g/this_is_me_around_my_lowest_weight_scroll_to/
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https://imgur.com/a/eOy9n
[Rant/Rave] Confessions from a Lunatic
/u/In_a_fatsuit [64" | 119# | 20.9 BMI | -104# | F]
Created: Mon Oct 24 15:39:07 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5979d9/confessions_from_a_lunatic/
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Part of why I haven't lost weight in 3 months is because I'm afraid world war 3 is on the horizon and I don't want to starve to death within one week of loss of food supply.
I'm equally terrified of being fat and being too thin to survive the Trumpocalypse.
Why do I even have to CONSIDER this?!??!? I see little difference between a political race that includes him, and a group of people gleefully pissing on the graves at Arlington. I'm terrified.
I'm sorry if this is t appropriate for the sub. But it relates to my ED.
I just want to bury myself in a hole and never come out. I can't take it anymore. If you think Dinosaurs were put in the ground by the devil as a test of faith, you are not competent enough to vote. Yet you still get to. What fun.
I wish this could be FUCKING OVER ALREADY so I can starve as I see fit.
/DumbCuntRanting
[Other] The silver lining to being sick!
/u/EmpireStateBitch [5'4" | CW 120 | GW 115 | UGW 100 | F]
Created: Mon Oct 24 15:34:56 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5978l2/the_silver_lining_to_being_sick/
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I got sick today, and puked all night and day. Lost 4lbs from all the puking! And I was too sick to eat all day.
[Rant/Rave] I'm single, I guess
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Oct 24 15:34:55 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5978l0/im_single_i_guess/
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[deleted]
[Discussion] Black Mirror episode Fifteen Million Merits
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Oct 24 15:30:52 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5977ta/black_mirror_episode_fifteen_million_merits/
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[deleted]
[Tip] UK BEAUTIES - it's not quite Halo Top but I found Oppo. It's low cal ice cream coming in at 385 cals per pint in three flavours. Link to website posted below. Available at waitrose, tesco and co-op. It really is nowhere near as good as Halo, but it'll do for a Halloween treat replacement! 💕
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Oct 24 15:29:26 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5977jl/uk_beauties_its_not_quite_halo_top_but_i_found/
---
https://i.reddituploads.com/b4262cac42a34680b184952466152fd7?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=0b6a17168052c0a8cd21a2f90ed0942e
[Rant/Rave] Upside To Every Downside [Long Post, tl;dr]
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Oct 24 15:06:12 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5972sr/upside_to_every_downside_long_post_tldr/
---
[deleted]
[Help] A terrible weekend
/u/little-paws
Created: Mon Oct 24 14:22:38 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/596ty9/a_terrible_weekend/
---
I feel like a bloated whale. I've eaten and drunk and done everything to excess.
Now I want to just be empty again. I'm panicking because my boyfriend is visiting in a couple of days and I am such a fat fuck.
[Goal] I haven't seen this since high school. So insignificant, but I feel so accomplished!
/u/newportshorty [5'9 | CW:180 | -40]
Created: Mon Oct 24 14:07:35 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/596qw3/i_havent_seen_this_since_high_school_so/
---
http://imgur.com/27yIJJR
[Discussion] What not to say?
/u/neveraunicorn [5'6" | 166 | 26.9 | -84 | F]
Created: Mon Oct 24 13:49:13 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/596n0h/what_not_to_say/
---
My doctor (and mother) want me to see a shrink. He thinks I have anxiety (hah...tip of the iceberg, buddy!) and that I need some counseling to work through my troubles. I am NOT ready to talk about anything food/weight/eating related. I saw someone mention say that saying "tracking my food helps me feel in control" is a big ED red flag to therapists. I was wondering if y'all know of any other things that I can avoid saying during the visits. Thanks in advance. Y'all are all wonderful people.
[Other] Weeee, I'm so happy for once.
/u/Miss_Embie [5'6" | 130 | 20.9 | -22| F]
Created: Mon Oct 24 13:45:36 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/596m92/weeee_im_so_happy_for_once/
---
So I really just wanted to share my news as I'm so happy!! I had a hospital appointment today. I'ver spent like 8 or more years trying to get sterilized but being under 30 I always had the answer, no, but today they said yes!! So in 3 to 6 months I'll be sterilized!! Now I another reason to keep losing the horrid weight, least I can try and look good on an operation table.
[Tip] Fun fact!
/u/TummyRumblz [5'8" | CW:162.8| LW: 146 | GW: 120 | F]
Created: Mon Oct 24 13:11:43 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/596f8b/fun_fact/
---
Crying burns 1.3 calories per minute
[Tip] Vitamins for Sensitive/Empty Tummy!
/u/commeunecho [5'7 | 123 | 19.25 | -17 | F]
Created: Mon Oct 24 13:11:21 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/596f53/vitamins_for_sensitiveempty_tummy/
---
Basically my stomach is really sensitive to supplements (especially when it's empty or almost empty, which is most of the time...) , I think vitamin B in particular, and it was hard to keep vitamins down.
I just started taking the Nature's Bounty [Multivitamin](https://www.amazon.com/Natures-Bounty-Gummies-75-Count-Package/dp/B003N23374/ref=sr_1_2_a_it?ie=UTF8&qid=1477335829&sr=8-2&keywords=gummy+multivitamin+nature%27s+bounty) and [B12](https://www.amazon.ca/Natures-Bounty-Vitamin-Gummies-Count/dp/B00X3G5TD6/ref=pd_sim_121_2?_encoding=UTF8&psc=1&refRID=DYW4DZY3N4YSVWG4JRB1) gummies after really liking their [Biotin](https://www.amazon.com/Natures-Bounty-Optimal-Solutions-Gummies/dp/B00G36TJKW/ref=pd_sim_121_3?_encoding=UTF8&pd_rd_i=B00G36TJKW&pd_rd_r=GR2J2HZ2S7QDC71XSRZT&pd_rd_w=wNzOs&pd_rd_wg=D6l4c&refRID=GR2J2HZ2S7QDC71XSRZT&th=1) and they don't hurt my stomach or make me nauseous at all, even without food! bless up~
If anyone is restricting and hesitant to take vitamins because they hurt your stomach, I recommend these. They are about 15 cals per 2 gummies, but worth it for safety~
<3
[Other] Not my GW by any means, but I've lost 10lbs in 5 weeks & I'm proud of my continuous progress
/u/notworthausername [5'7" | 129 | 20.1 | -10 | 26F]
Created: Mon Oct 24 13:05:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/596dzo/not_my_gw_by_any_means_but_ive_lost_10lbs_in_5/
---
https://i.redd.it/j98zl9mb0htx.png
[Other] Even though I had to eat way more than I intended to this evening....
/u/aerienne [5'5" | 145.8 | F]
Created: Mon Oct 24 12:43:23 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59697h/even_though_i_had_to_eat_way_more_than_i_intended/
---
...my insanely slow digestion system is there to support me. After years of bulimia, it seems to take hours before my food even starts to digest. I can throw up food from this morning while it's almost bedtime.
My terrible acid reflux and GERD was bothering me. I made a beautiful dinner tonight and no one ate it. So I had some. Knowing I can just throw it all up in an hour is oddly reassuring. I used to have to get out food as fast as I could, now it's like 'Eh, it'll be there a while.'
It's terrible, but I feel no guilt. Just dark humor.
[Goal] I lost all the weight I gained at the beginning of the semester!!
/u/dongledongs [5'6" | 137 lbs | -14 | GW 115 | 22.11 | F]
Created: Mon Oct 24 12:39:45 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5968fi/i_lost_all_the_weight_i_gained_at_the_beginning/
---
I gained 10 lbs at the beginning of the semester and I've been plateuing at 143 for a loooooooong time. But thanks to my card malfunctioning this weekend I had an excuse to starve it off(lmao) and the scale wavered between 136 and 137!!! I'm so friggin happy y'all. Next I'm gonna aim for 130 and when I get to the 120's I'm gonna treat myself to a cute outfit!
Love y'all and I hope you all reach your small goal this week!
[Help] Loose skin
/u/scaredalternate [5'5'' | 166 | GW 160 | UGW 120 | -54lbs | M]
Created: Mon Oct 24 12:22:27 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5964tu/loose_skin/
---
I was at 110 at my lightest when I was put on medication that made me go up to 220 in 9 months and maintain there despite everything I tried to go down.
Since July I have been able to restrict and get myself down to 178, I have also been building a lot of muscle in my arms, legs, and core.
Now I am left with all of this loose skin, mostly on my thighs and stomach, but some on my arms. It makes me feel so uncomfortable because it just hangs there and makes my body look disgusting if I try to wear a tight fitting shirt or shorts.
[Rant/Rave] Why why why do people insist on commenting on my eating habits
/u/pinotblanc [5'3 | GW:115 | 23.2 | -23 | F]
Created: Mon Oct 24 11:58:21 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/595zmu/why_why_why_do_people_insist_on_commenting_on_my/
---
"You need to come eat lunch with me at 1pm because you didn't bring anything", said by one of my friends.
My response was i dont have money to spend until Friday (which is true) and that I ate breakfast (not true but whatever). I've used the excuse that I'm eating healthier but that never worked. I've said I'm not hungry and I'm not going to eat when I'm not hungry, that didn't work.
"But you don't eat regularly which is not okay."
My response then was that I was literally going to eat at 3pm when I got home. Only 2 hours after she wanted to get lunch. And that I eat 3 meals a day (not true).
Why why why do you care?? I don't want a cheeseburger! I don't want fast food! *And* I don't have extra money to spend!
[Discussion] Why are you starving?
/u/color_me_thin
Created: Mon Oct 24 11:44:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/595wp9/why_are_you_starving/
---
What's your motivation? (Long or short term)
Personally I've convinced myself that I'll finally like what l see in the mirror once I hit goal, that maybe the boy that I like could finally like me back. The feeling of success I get when I lose.
(On mobile can't flair)
[Help] Trying to Ignore the "little voice", those thoughts that pop off randomly just to make sure that I never recover
/u/pocket-morty [5'1" | 163 | 30 | -27 | F]
Created: Mon Oct 24 11:13:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/595q3b/trying_to_ignore_the_little_voice_those_thoughts/
---
I have been working OVERTIME lately trying to get to a place of balance. Unfortunately BED has caused me to gain a lot of weight and I'm trying so hard to lose the weight without playing into my normal cycles.
Something that makes it hard is that my mind is constantly experiencing thoughts that make it hard to let a little loose and less restrictive.
I'm still not sure exactly why I binge, I know I need professional help for that but I'm just not ready for that. I've tried to work with my therapist about BED but its just really hard for me to be vulnerable so I lie. And after I always know I'm sabotaging myself, but I still just continue fucking lying to everyone. Anyway, that's why I'm not doing therapy for BED or for anything right now. It started to feel like a waste of money to go because I just kept lying and saying things that I knew would make me seem healthy.
In the meantime I've realized that I always crash and burn and binge, binge, BINGE after a cycle of restriction which I think is pretty typical. My solution was to do higher restriction so I can eat more but still hit below my TDEE and lose weight slowly. The problem is, I come up with plans to do eat more calories and I still deep down know it will only last a few days. It's not quite a defeatist attitude so much as I feel that deep inside I have a separate person who has plan of their own. For example, I try to find balance or a gray area but ultimately my thinking always becomes so black and white. I'm either eating several thousand calories and hating myself for it, or I'm stressing out about saying under a certain number and hating myself about it. My limit always gets lower and lower until I can't do it anymore and then I feel like a failure, so I just say "fuck it" and go on a binge haul at the grocery story or fast food spots by my house.
I just realized this when I decided to try again for higher restriction, so I thought to myself, "OK, I'm gonna try to hit just below 1200 each day and not stress it." It's just hard because the little voice in my head is telling me "yeah your limit is 1200 but you better stay below 1,000." and then again, the voice says so "1200 is the limit you tell people, but 1,000 is your true limit and in reality you better not eat fucking more than 700 calories."
Anyway, Idk if others experience this but if you do, do you have any advice for ignoring the thoughts or over coming them? Even if you don't have this experience, please give me any ideas or suggestions on how you fight against your own brain.
[Other] Participants needed for online ED study
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Oct 24 11:03:00 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/595nqb/participants_needed_for_online_ed_study/
---
[deleted]
Me_irl
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Oct 24 10:59:10 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/595mtx/me_irl/
---
http://i.imgur.com/63Q2lUf.gifv
[Goal] Anyone want to join me in committing to a binge-free week?
/u/mmm_erythritol
Created: Mon Oct 24 10:42:14 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/595jdk/anyone_want_to_join_me_in_committing_to_a/
---
I'm ashamed to say its been a long time since I've made it a week without bingeing... I desperately want to get my shit together and break down this horrible habit/compulsion/whatever–starting with a small goal of one binge-free week. Mondays make a great day 1, so here I am.
I want to post here for accountability through the week or, if it's allowed, do a daily post (just until Sunday) where I and any who want to join can get some encouragement and talk about our struggles and goals within the context of making it a week without bingeing.
So, if you want to join me, comment below and commit to a binge-free week! Also feel free to share any other goals you have :)
Together we can do this!
[Meme/Humor] when you take a few bites to make your parents happy and then spit it out when they're not looking
/u/clamshells [5'7 | 115 | 18.0 | f]
Created: Mon Oct 24 10:41:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/595j53/when_you_take_a_few_bites_to_make_your_parents/
---
http://i.imgur.com/63Q2lUf.gif
[Meme/Humor] when you take a few bites to make your parents happy and then spit it out when they're not looking
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Oct 24 10:39:20 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/595iqm/when_you_take_a_few_bites_to_make_your_parents/
---
http://i.imgur.com/63Q2lUf.gifv
What's your #1 enemy food?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Oct 24 10:25:50 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/595fr1/whats_your_1_enemy_food/
---
[deleted]
[Meme/Humor] Mom: "You look anorexic" Me (pissed off): "Um maybe, because I am?"
/u/Greenteapls [5'5" | 100 | 16.84 | -35 | F]
Created: Mon Oct 24 10:22:34 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/595f0x/mom_you_look_anorexic_me_pissed_off_um_maybe/
---
http://imgur.com/PcadQml
[Discussion] Daily Food Diary! October 24, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Mon Oct 24 10:03:04 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/595asa/daily_food_diary_october_24_2016/
---
This is a daily food diary thread for October 24, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
[Thinspo] [Request] Fantasy-Inspired Thinspo like these? I'm thinking Elves, Fairies, Pixies, Nymphs, etc.
/u/lyxil [5' 0"| 93 lb | 19.13 | -47 | f]
Created: Mon Oct 24 10:01:11 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/595ack/request_fantasyinspired_thinspo_like_these_im/
---
http://imgur.com/a/VNeLn
[Rant/Rave] Ruined Food
/u/oksneaky [63in | CW: 126.8 | GW: 115 | F]
Created: Mon Oct 24 09:50:10 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59582i/ruined_food/
---
TL;DR - Whine about my food being ruined by leaving my freezer open, no need to read my vent I just need to type it :(
I came home after an all day day-date with the bf to find that my freezer was open. I don't know if it had been just the time we were gone (lunch, movies, shopping, etc, ~8 hours) or from the evening before. I don't know if it was me or him, and I'm not going to even ask him and just say it was me who did it so he doesn't feel bad. So... food is ruined. ALL my frozen chicken breasts I bought in bulk on sale, several Michelina's, turkey sausage, so much hamburger meat... all the soups that I meal-prepped, the prepped crack chicken... anything with meat. I've left frozen veggies out before for a long time and I am still going to eat those few packs even though they might not taste as good, but the meat is all done 100%. I spent this morning throwing away so much money. This month has been shit.
I guess today I'll just have coffee and see what I find around the office or just fast since I have nothing to eat. I didn't feel like trying to pack a lunch after I threw away all that food even though the fridge food was still fine, it's not much left in there to really make. Now I need to do some grocery shopping and meal prep to get my freezer back stocked or I will convince myself that eating out every meal is necessary like I use to since I don't have anything that I can prepare quickly :(
[Goal] For those of you stuck in weight gain cycle
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Oct 24 09:17:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5951pp/for_those_of_you_stuck_in_weight_gain_cycle/
---
[deleted]
[Other] I have a friend who's recovering
/u/k-w- [5'5 | CW 95 | F]
Created: Mon Oct 24 08:42:37 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/594uud/i_have_a_friend_whos_recovering/
---
Sorry no flair, I'm on my phone.
I have a friend in recovery from anorexia. She was hospitalized last year and I'm not sure how "recovered" she is now. She doesn't know about my ED afaik, and I don't want her to find out.
From the moment she told me about it (before she was hospitalized) I have been worried that by telling her I could worsen her ED, and also that if I told her she'd think I was trying to copy her because I haven't told anyone or been diagnosed. She knows my diet isn't exactly "healthy," because before she told me about her anorexia, we talked about how we both are vegetarians and also really picky eaters and will only eat certain foods.
I recently got out of a psych hospital. I was there because of my suicidal ideations, not ED. She's the only person I know who would understand something like this and I feel so alone.
I'm not sure if she even wants to be my friend anymore. I kind of isolated myself in my depression and we haven't really hung out in about a year. It just occurred to me that she might be on this sub. If you're reading this, hi!
[Help] New here, stats how-to?
/u/light_hollow_space [5'4 | CW: 159 | BMI 27 | -36 | F | GW: 125 | LW: 99 | HW: 198]
Created: Mon Oct 24 08:20:42 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/594qvd/new_here_stats_howto/
---
I can't figure out how to put my stats my name and I am feeling soooo stoooopid. Can anyone point me in the right direction? I swear I looked around on the FAQ and couldn't find it.
[Rant/Rave] Now I understand that distinctive Chuck E. Cheese's smell...
/u/CowOffTheFarm [65" | 145 | 24.41 | - | F | GW 120]
Created: Mon Oct 24 08:19:21 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/594qlq/now_i_understand_that_distinctive_chuck_e_cheeses/
---
Pizza vomit is the worst. Sauce + stomach acid = satan. Plus the cheesey bread combo, ewww. I filled up that binge with a bunch of other processed foods (hot pockets mostly) and the all the preservatives and chemically things just add an extra layer of ugh. I wasn't intending on purging, and after that i'm never going to binge on pizza again. Last night was bad y'all.
Saw blood on the toilet paper this morning. It all makes sense now.
body check 10/24, 115-118?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Oct 24 08:05:50 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/594o5m/body_check_1024_115118/
---
https://i.reddituploads.com/f9a2d83acb844669b957e16c6a072246?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=dd55720bc6ec18ad855a30f840ed4f88
[Goal] Great weekend
/u/erilaz- [5'7 | CW: 185 | GW: 110 | -45lbs | F]
Created: Mon Oct 24 07:58:13 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/594ms9/great_weekend/
---
I weighed myself after a weekend of eating chicken Alfredo pizza and cookies and was scared of the scale but I lost 4 pounds since last week. Makes me feel like my self control around junk food is becoming a habit which made me feel good. I really didn't want to gain since I'm in a wedding this weekend. Hopefully I can get under 180 for it ☺️
I hope y'all had good weekends as well!!!
[Help] Advice on relationship issue?
/u/LeLierre [5'7 | 134.4 | 21.05 | F]
Created: Mon Oct 24 07:01:11 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/594d9h/advice_on_relationship_issue/
---
Hey guys, I'm on my alt right now since my BF knows my other account- but I'd really appreciate your input on something.
The other day I sent my BF a photo of me from 2 years ago (where I weigh 20lbs less than I do now). He said he probably wouldn't have spoken to me back then since, I quote, "You were just *too* pretty, *too* perfect. You looked like you were on top of your shit *and* everyone else's. The way you look now makes you a lot more approachable."
Which, I basically took to mean "Hey, LeLierre, you've let yourself go. But that's okay, I like you fat, because I'm kind of lacking in confidence myself." When I pointed out my interpretation to him, he just kind of stammered and changed the topic after finally admitting that yes, I was objectively more attractive when I was thinner.
So guys, I'm actually really *really* torn up about this. Should I bring it up with him again, or just keep my head down and restrict more so I can hopefully get back to that point?
[Help] DAE wake up feeling extremely bloated?
/u/pinotblanc [5'3 | GW:115 | 23.2 | -23 | F]
Created: Mon Oct 24 07:00:45 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/594d6x/dae_wake_up_feeling_extremely_bloated/
---
Sometimes I wake up and I feel like a beached whale. Even though the day before I only drank tea and water, and had less than 500 calories. The only "processed" food I eat is 2 tbs of fat free feta cheese in salads and I watch my sodium intake.
What am I doing wrong?
[Other] Monday morning reflection!
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Oct 24 06:41:03 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/594a2n/monday_morning_reflection/
---
https://i.reddituploads.com/8c9b81d2d5054da8b053275015b51a2c?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=8c61000807c4c20c465875f5f6de1a02
[Other] Good morning, lovelies 💕
/u/SpitAndPennyStyle [5"2' |SW:~185 | CW: 157.5 *drinks bleach*| GW:105 | F]
Created: Mon Oct 24 06:19:44 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5946yf/good_morning_lovelies/
---
Today is a bright new day and every day is a new opportunity to start over. We all have our setbacks. It is never too late to get back in the saddle. I hope you guys have a brilliant day 💕 I'll be sending positive vibes ✌🏻
[Rant/Rave] Never felt guilt like this-
/u/WhyRedTape [5'6 | 156lbs | 23.40 | -29lbs |]
Created: Mon Oct 24 06:18:20 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5946r0/never_felt_guilt_like_this/
---
At this point I'm not sure how to feel aside from ashamed.
Early July I fell sick. Really sick. I couldn't move due to the intense pain and even drinking was enough to make me dread it, let alone eating. Constant trips to the bathroom and eventually blood where there shouldn't ever be. In one weekend I lost more weight than I could in a month and hate myself for wishing it would happen again.
Yet despite how horribly painful it was, I hate that i want it back. I hate that i wish I hadn't binged afterwards. I almost despise myself for wishing it would crop back up despite ending up in the emergency room. I almost feel ill just because I want to be that sick again, too lose the weight I'm desperate to lose at all costs. I feel lost because of it. No matter how hard I try, how well I restrict, I just end up back in a b/p cycle, trying desperately to just break it again.
I'm mostly just mad at myself, or ashamed
Flair- can't flair due to mobile. Should be rant/rave
[Tip] PGX fiber
/u/tattoo987654321 [5'5" | 137 lbs | F]
Created: Mon Oct 24 06:05:36 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5944z1/pgx_fiber/
---
On my phone, sorry for no flair. Also sorry if this breaks any rules!
I just bought a bottle of PGX fiber pills at Whole Foods (for $32, fffffuuu). They're only 10 cals a pill and each one is 2g of fiber, but you're supposed to work up to taking like 12 a day. They're awesome! They definitely help keep me full, you HAVE to drink a ton of water with them so you don't get constipated (which helps with the whole staying full bit), and it's an easy way to add fiber to your diet (I saw the post about the colon cancer and it made me think to post this.) I've been using them as a breakfast sub, because combined with coffee, they keep me from feeling hungry for ages. Highly recommended! You don't even have to take them with food.
[Discussion] Weekly Stats Update! October 24, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Mon Oct 24 06:03:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5944qd/weekly_stats_update_october_24_2016/
---
This is the weekly status thread for October 24, 2016.
The weekly status thread is to help motivate our users, and to eventually see how far they've come! Be it for weight loss, weight gain, or maintaining- everyone is welcome. Previous updates are archived [here.](http://www.reddit.com/r/proED/wiki/archives)
Please include the following information (with all necessary units of measurement):
* Height:
* Current weight (CW):
* Highest weight (HW):
* Lowest weight (LW):
* Goal weight (GW):
* Ultimate goal weight (UGW):
* Weight lost (WL):
* BMI: ([Use this to calculate your BMI](https://people.maths.ox.ac.uk/trefethen/bmi_calc.html))
* Age:
* Gender expression:
Here's a handy-dandy copy/paste of the above format:
* Height:
* CW:
* HW:
* LW:
* GW:
* UGW:
* WL:
* BMI:
* Age:
* Gender expression:
*****
Status threads are posted every Monday.
Have any questions or concerns? Comment below, or [PM the mods.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FproED)
[Help] What the holy hell
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Oct 24 05:54:59 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5943jw/what_the_holy_hell/
---
[deleted]
[Discussion] DAE get weird/odd food cravings?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Oct 24 03:48:45 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/593orx/dae_get_weirdodd_food_cravings/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] I was going to have a maintenance week this week to get my strength up for a race on the 31st. I was looking forward to having a reason to not be hungry. Now it's here I just.. can't.
/u/smokesanddietcokes [Adipose Industries]
Created: Mon Oct 24 03:05:34 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/593kgc/i_was_going_to_have_a_maintenance_week_this_week/
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The illusion of choice.
I *always* tell myself.. I can stop fasting and restricting whenever I like, and start eating normally. It's just a matter of choice. I choose to have a problem with eating. I choose to have a problem not being comfortable 'within a healthy BMI', and wanting to be lower. I choose to avoid and practically fear the grand majority of food.
So I chose to eat for this race. It's only a 5k, but it's a very important event for me. VERY important.. as in, I've been looking forward to this for a YEAR.
It was an easy choice, to choose to eat for a week leading up to it to make damn sure I would be running it at my full strength. To choose to include carbs, even more carbs than usual. I had a meal plan and everything, stocked up on some foods, planned to make a nice egg bake and suchwhat. Put on a pound? That's nothing! I've been anticipating this race for so so long! It's worth it, right!
But the Monday of this 'maintenance week' is here and I just *cannot*. I don't want to eat. I don't want to waste time that could be spent losing weight, by maintaining. Worse than maintaining, what if I eat and then end up *over*eating because one thing leads to another as it so often does for me? I certainly don't want to put weight ON. That pound or two I didn't think I cared about? Who am I kidding. I care. So much. Shit.
I think about the race and tell myself that I don't need to eat for it *just* yet. Who needs a full week of eating for a race? It's only 5k. It's not a marathon. Fast today as usual. Try to fast tomorrow as usual, probably fail have a snack in the evening as usual. Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, try to restrict as usual. I usually eat more Saturdays and Sundays anyway, as my partner is usually with me those days.. he wont be with me this weekend though, but I can start eating for my race then anyway. I'll just shove in those carbs. Maybe it'll even work out better that way, somehow. It'll be enough at least.
I'm sure if I look hard enough, I can twist science to find a reason why not eating, even in anticipation of a race, is a good idea.
So many people in this subreddit seem to love being hungry and see it as success when they are. I'm different, I *hate* being hungry.. but it's a necessary, oh so fucking necessary, evil. I can't love being hungry, but I can't *stop* being hungry.
I can stop being hungry Saturday. I'll even give myself 4 days off from then, the Saturday and Sunday leading up to it, the Monday of the race, and the day after as a reward - and because my partner will be with me then anyway.
I hope I don't suck at my special Halloween race.
[Discussion] I feel like a fraud.
/u/slytherinsedona [5'5 | 115.0 | 19.1 | -25.0 | F]
Created: Mon Oct 24 02:38:22 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/593htn/i_feel_like_a_fraud/
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So the sorority I'm in is partnered with an organization that supports body positivity. We're supposed to write "inspirational messages" across campus such as "smile you're beautiful" and "size doesn't matter". This being said, I love my sorority. I love the philanthropy we do, and I wholeheartedly love my sisters for who they are. But I feel like a total fucking fraud going out and telling people to love themselves and that they're beautiful and that size doesn't matter when I know those things don't apply to me. Like I have absolutely no room to hop on the body positivity train when I literally avoid meals at the house with my sisters and can barely stand to look at myself. DAE feel this way if you're in this type of situation?
[Rant/Rave] I just keep fucking up.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Oct 24 01:43:56 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/593cl6/i_just_keep_fucking_up/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] Lost a bit of weight since I last came here. 106 to 98 lbs. BUT I FEEL BIGGER!
/u/prettythin [5'5" | 98 | 16.5 | -47 | F]
Created: Mon Oct 24 01:34:59 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/593bqm/lost_a_bit_of_weight_since_i_last_came_here_106/
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Can't seem to edit my flair but I'm currently 5,5" and 98 lbs. My bmi is 16.5 but I swear I look and feel bigger than I ever have before. I don't get it. My stomach is bigger, my legs are atrocious. My ribs hardly poke out at all. I pretty much only have collar bones and hip bones. Why? Just.. why?! I thought 100 pounds would be the magic number but no. I'll always be too big.
[Rant/Rave] New favorite drink! 10 calories a bottle, full of flavor, and no artificial sweeteners! :)
/u/Waterlover85 [5'4"~ CW: 127 BMI: 22.2 ~ GW: 89 ~ lbs lost: 23 ~ female]
Created: Mon Oct 24 00:40:18 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/593649/new_favorite_drink_10_calories_a_bottle_full_of/
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https://i.redd.it/o5jemzi3bdtx.jpg
[Rant/Rave] "i didn't wanna say anything"
/u/gin-and-lemon [🐝 5'1"| cw: 150lbs | bmi: 29 | -15lbs | f]
Created: Mon Oct 24 00:08:10 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5932nh/i_didnt_wanna_say_anything/
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"but like, your face looks so thin! i swear you've lost weight since being in the city"
my closest friend in the city who knows about my ed 'history' ('but its totally in the past!!!') just told me this today
the scale says i haven't lost much, my bmi is still obese, and its not like i've lost inches, far as i can tell, so literally all the weight i lost came from my face? that's neat
(my cheekbones are cool rn because even if i don't bother contouring, it looks like i kinda did anyway)
like im not sure if this is a nsv or like what
[Rant/Rave] My birthday is today.
/u/BlackGirlSteeze
Created: Sun Oct 23 23:46:23 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59301i/my_birthday_is_today/
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I'm turning 20 and the only thing I'm doing is going to therapy.
[Discussion] I feel like this makes me a horrible person, but...
/u/kinaadman [5'1" | SW 210 | CW 110 | GW: 90 | F]
Created: Sun Oct 23 23:16:03 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/592wgl/i_feel_like_this_makes_me_a_horrible_person_but/
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I've been going through a tough time lately and using food to cope with stress (death in the family, having to take care of people, etc.). I'm trying to get back on track with my weight loss, which is easier when I'm at work because...well...I work with a lot of big girls. And I look at them and think to myself, "That'll be you if you binge again today." The desire to eat goes away altogether. It's better than coffee. It makes me feel like a horrible person, but it works. Does anyone else do this?
[Help] Anyone (successfully) get out of a binge/bp/cs cycle?
/u/MarquessOfCats [5'2 | Fat | F]
Created: Sun Oct 23 22:45:11 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/592sk9/anyone_successfully_get_out_of_a_bingebpcs_cycle/
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For the majority of my ED I've almost exclusively restricted. Long story short, after a certain traumatic incident mixed with a bunch of stress, I've fallen into a huge BP and CS cycle for the past 4 months. I BP about once every two days and CS multiple times a day. :/
I'm maintaining (gaining + losing the same 5lbs) but scared I'll gain. I've always been mostly a restricter, and this is super unusual for me.
Has anyone else gone from restriction to BP and managed to get back to just plain 'ol restricting? (Or at least lessened the amount they've done it?). Any tips or advice on how to stop this? I'm so tired of this and feel like shit.
[Discussion] DAE feel just...so fucking weird?
/u/The_Marshmallow_Test [5'5 | CW:dont weigh :3| GW:skinny arms| F]
Created: Sun Oct 23 22:43:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/592sbk/dae_feel_justso_fucking_weird/
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Do you guys have weird secret habits, that are not strictly ED related you want to share?
Sometimes i feel like I'm actually a crazy person who has somehow managed to trick everyone into thinking I'm not for the last 23 years.
Maybe it's only a NY (or big city) thing, but you know those vaguely creepy old ladies you see sometimes? They look like they have been fossilized in a lifetime of strange habits. Like this tiny old lady on my block *always* wears all black, and this overdrawn dark purple lipstick. Probably when she was young, it was just a slightly eccentric, cool "look". But now, it's like there's something just...off about her.
But tbh sometimes I feel like i'm looking at my future when I see her.
I have so many strange habits, I've had them for so long and I can feel myself being calcified inside them. Here's some of the secret weird shit I do, in no particular order.
- I DESTROY my fingers. I was like lmaooo when y'all were uploading hand pics, cause mine are literally so gross it would have been hilarious if I uploaded one. It started when I was 12, because my cuticles weren't "perfect" and they annoyed me. But I didn't like just pushing them back because I knew they were still "there" even if I couldn't see them. So I would peel the cuticle skin off, but sometimes I would end up peeling off finger skin, so then I would have to "fix" it by peeling off the leftover skin flap on my finger...etc. Flash forward a decade and the entire first knuckle of most of my fingers look so bizarre. I am *constantly* picking at the skin, it's so gross but I don't even care, they are truly beyond repair at this point.
- I *have* to wear black eyeliner ever day, I have worn it the same way since I was 16. Im not kidding, I did a month long trek in the Himalayas and I still put on eyeliner every morning. Straight up. Literally at 15,000 feet elevation, wind in my eyes, snot all over my face- wearing black winged eyeliner. It's not even really to look good, l just don't feel like me without it.
- I also compulsively reapply my makeup. I only wear eyeliner, mascara and a bit of concealer. But I touch them up constantly. Even if I am completely alone. Like I just did it, even though it's 1am and the office is totally empty right now. Why???? Idk????
- Same with eye drops.
- Same with perfume. I am obsessed with perfume, I wear it to bed most nights. I sleep alone. So unless im trying to impress my laptop it makes no sense.
- Speaking of sleeping alone, I can not sleep with someone else next to me. Whenever I have sex I just end up lying awake until morning, counting down the minutes until it's acceptable to ask this person to leave or for me to.
- I'm barely exaggerating when I say I live off of pretzel m&ms. Unless I'm eating a meal with people, I am eating m&ms. Counting out the calories and turning the jumbled mess into a little lattice of neat, color coded groups is like taking a Zanax for me.
- I try to keep a normal person schedule but I always end up being this weird nocturnal gremlin, drifting around empty buildings and sidewalks at 3 in the morning.
- All of my friends are over clubbing, but I just love mindless, senseless dancing. I have like 30 promoter numbers in my phone from college and keep 5 inch heels in my office and sometimes I just go clubbing alone, do coke with strangers, don't tell anyone, show up to work the next day a mess.
There's so many more, but I don't want to bore you guys.
I know. I know, no ones "normal". I guess I don't think I'm actually clinically insane, but..... I just feel **so** *fucking weird* sometimes. Plz plz share your weird shit
**EDIT**: omg you guys!! i did not expect to get so many replies, there are so many of us weirdos here <333 I'm at work rn, so i'm gonna reply to these all later, but I just wanted to say this made me feel so understood and less alone, thanks for replying yall :)
[Meme/Humor] #goals
/u/KajaIsForeverAlone [height:5'9 | CW: 147 BMI:21 | weight lost:15 lbs | Gender: F]
Created: Sun Oct 23 22:42:29 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/592s88/goals/
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https://i.redd.it/ej9ljuseqctx.png
[Rant/Rave] Well
/u/rainbowsunshinedust [5'5 | 105 | 17.68 | GW 95 | F]
Created: Sun Oct 23 22:09:13 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/592nqs/well/
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Today I got trashed. Saw TPB. Embarrassed my stupid ugly awkward drunk ass on stage. Now I want to die and gorge my fat self with food booze and self hatred. BBQ is the worst to purge. Can I be normal please? If I didn't have to be awake tommorrow I d atleast submerge myself into skyrim and more booze. Kinda wanna die. Kinda gotta be here. Fuck me.
[Tip] This is so cool! Body visualizer
/u/JustaGirl921
Created: Sun Oct 23 22:02:51 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/592muv/this_is_so_cool_body_visualizer/
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http://bodyvisualizer.com/
Not sure if any of you have seen this coming but I stumbled upon it today.
You put in your height and weight indoor measurements and you can slide them W bigger or smaller and you see an image of what that really looks like on a body. You can even choose gender.
It totally changed my goal weight. Really put into perspective how much I really need to lose. :/
***EDIT***
OK now I found this and I like it more
http://modelmydiet.com/
I'm still disgusting but at least I look human lol
[Discussion] Fast day 2. How many days have you guys fasted?
/u/setniessesed [5'11.5" | CW: 141 GW: 130 | 18.71 | -18lbs | 20/F]
Created: Sun Oct 23 21:38:03 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/592jbu/fast_day_2_how_many_days_have_you_guys_fasted/
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It's my second day of fasting for this session; I feel alright. How long have you guys gone with fasting? (With nothing of great caloric value; just Powerade zero or gum/coffee)? I've only done it for two days so far; I want to extend it over tomorrow as well now and slowly increase the duration over time.
I'm considering drinking liquids with caloric value after tomorrow.
[Goal] I'm freaking out because the last time I was weighed myself I was 114 and now I'm here and I'm like what?! I feel like it's lying to me
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Oct 23 21:30:56 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/592i88/im_freaking_out_because_the_last_time_i_was/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/c1784c454d6748cb962316c26e2e0fa9?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=5602fa503825126148fe4d9cccf25dd0
[Rant/Rave] I cannot believe what my bf just said to me.
/u/kafka__dreams
Created: Sun Oct 23 20:47:49 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/592br8/i_cannot_believe_what_my_bf_just_said_to_me/
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My boyfriend has never EVER said anything negative about my looks in any way. He knows about my eating issues and how I feel about my body. Just now he was complaining he had lost weight unintentionally and stepped on the scale and said, "ah im 148." I said "ahah yea I've been there." (A few years ago I was nearly that high, carried it decently, am now 118) and he fuckin says "wow you were pretty fat." Oh my god. No one has ever said anything that bad to me. He immediately realized he fucked up and apologized so many times saying he never saw me that way and didn't mean it. And I get it honestly, he wasn't trying to hurt me. But oh lord. That hurt.
[Discussion] I'm sorry Halo Top, but i'm not loving these new flavors. Except Cookie Dough. It's Amazing!
/u/CowOffTheFarm [65" | 145 | 24.41 | - | F | GW 120]
Created: Sun Oct 23 20:27:20 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5928lj/im_sorry_halo_top_but_im_not_loving_these_new/
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So, I just cracked open S'mores. I licked the paper and immediately went "Ugh?!?!" it is overly sweet and reminds me more of honey and cinnamon than smores. The dark chocolate in it is too dark in comparison to the rest of it, in my opinion. Tried the cookies & cream next. It is also kinda overly sweet, and it tastes good... but not like cookies and cream. They both seem artificial. I'm having a weird food time now though, and maybe my tastebuds are off?
However, HOLY CRAP THE COOKIE DOUGH IS HEAVEN SENT! I usually buy my boyfriend "distraction ice-cream" so he doesn't binge on my pricey Halo Top or go crazy with jealously over my treats. Well, the cookie dough is so on point! We put it next to full-fat name brand ice cream and the Halo Top is completely superior.
Flaired as "discussion" because I know many of you also went insane waiting for the new flavors (after they leaked in early October) and i'd love your opinions on them.
[Rant/Rave] Something embarrassing.
/u/Just_a_Paper_Bag [5'8" | F]
Created: Sun Oct 23 19:45:00 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/592274/something_embarrassing/
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Anyone else listen to boyfriend ASMR boyfriend videos?
I'm married, but my husband doesn't talk to me and I stay because he doesn't bother me about wasting away.
Or drinking. Either I'm drinking or not eating and holy fuck I'm lonely and sometimes I want someone to say nice things to me.
It does good, but sometimes it's nice to be held too.
[Rant/Rave] I need to punch a hole in my belt
/u/Edible_pain [5 foot 6 in| 133 | -over 100lbs| F]
Created: Sun Oct 23 18:53:15 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/591u3h/i_need_to_punch_a_hole_in_my_belt/
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i've been making better choices with food and it shows. Its been over a month since I have stopped my weekly cheesecake binges (I was eating two 9 inch cheesecakes every monday). Tonight I will be charging my power drill and adding a hole to my leather belt because its now too big.
[Discussion] DAE feel really uncomfortable when "normal" people casually talk about binging?
/u/ifitmakesmehappy [5'5 | 125| -45| F]
Created: Sun Oct 23 18:52:50 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/591u0n/dae_feel_really_uncomfortable_when_normal_people/
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It makes my skin crawl when people talk about how much they ate, that they stuffed themselves, that they ate "the whole box of cookies," etc. It also just makes me uncomfortable being around people who are clearly eating a lot, not because they are physically hungry, but because the food tastes good.
For example, this past week I was working at a uni event in a booth and we were offering free cupcakes to people. I didn't have any, but everyone else working at the booth seemed to be eating them, or like they had absolutely no self-control around these darn cupcakes.
I kind of shrugged that off as my ED talking, like, maybe this is normal for them? Then one of the girls said "omg, I'm so bad, this is my second cupcake" while the other one admitted she was on her 5th (yes, they're both very overweight).
As someone who struggle(s)(d) with binge-eating, this kind of stuff just puts me off so much. Because it reminds me of me.
Also, overall, I just hate the word "binge." I hate when people say they "binge-watched" a show, all it does is instantly remind me of binge-eating. idk.
I feel like this is how a recovering alcoholic must feel when non-alcoholics talk about how "f*cked up they got last night," etc. Like, to that person it was a fun night, but to the alcoholic that would be falling back into their old habits/vices/personal hell.
Thoughts?
[Thinspo] Daily Thinspo.
/u/BlackGirlSteeze
Created: Sun Oct 23 17:13:52 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/591dom/daily_thinspo/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/bf50741a9f124f918b82ce4df08ea349?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=ce61ddcef08bfc176b48f266340c3991
[Discussion] What do you do for your anxiety/agitation?
/u/dudeswallow
Created: Sun Oct 23 16:39:56 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5917uu/what_do_you_do_for_your_anxietyagitation/
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https://www.reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5917uu/what_do_you_do_for_your_anxietyagitation/
[Meme/Humor] My whole office is sick
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Oct 23 16:28:06 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5915vb/my_whole_office_is_sick/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] When my loved ones say, "You haven't eaten much today."
/u/fckk [5'4| CW 120lbs | 20.60 | GW 115 | F]
Created: Sun Oct 23 16:26:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5915od/when_my_loved_ones_say_you_havent_eaten_much_today/
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Yes, I have. At 3am when everyone was sleeping, my impulse control completely imploded and I ate a day's+ worth of food. That is why I feel too sick and too anxious to eat during normal hours when you're awake. That is why I am terrified to put food to my mouth during waking hours - what if I spiral into a binge? I can't trust myself. If I eat at 1pm will I spiral into a 12 hour binge until 1 am? If I eat at 4pm, will I spiral into a night-time binge hell? So I don't eat at all because I'm imprisoned by the fear of chaos. Nope, I can't eat until the sun goes down, and with it, my defenses and will power. Only then, when you can't see me, do I eat "much."
And I'm sorry that my ED took your concern and warped it into nagging. I'm sorry I snapped at you when you only care. My ED warps your intentions and dictates my trigger responses. I wish you could see inside of me, to see that I'm really appreciative of your concern, and I love you, and I'm being imprisoned, and I'm sorry.
Fuck. We live in such a secret world.
[Rant/Rave] I feel like I'm on the verge of a binge.
/u/Wildrumpus273172
Created: Sun Oct 23 16:17:43 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/59143q/i_feel_like_im_on_the_verge_of_a_binge/
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I didn't eat until about an hour ago but I just devoured half my day's in about half an hour. Hopefully I can get through this and then maybe fast tomorrow!
[Rant/Rave] win some/lose some
/u/salt_skin [5'4" | CW 134lbs | BMI 23.45 | GW 90 lbs | F]
Created: Sun Oct 23 15:59:47 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5910w2/win_somelose_some/
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i've been down and out about binging all week, but despite it all, i was told that i look like i might blow away in the wind. personally, that's an exaggeration to me, but perhaps i'm losing again? i can't really tell since i no longer have a scale, but it was the first comment i've gotten on my weight loss in awhile and well, it felt good! but on the other hand, i'm still very worried about the possibility of another binge. i really don't want to get stuck in b/p or restrict cycle again and i don't want to start gaining weight back again. i've worked too hard to lose what i have and i'm far from my goal.
[Discussion] Are You Happy?
/u/SkinnyWaifu [H: 5"3 | BMI: fat | WL: -8.8 | F]
Created: Sun Oct 23 15:55:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/591088/are_you_happy/
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I'm obsessed with ED documentaries, forums, etc. I always find that nearly every documented person expresses that they are severely depressed and miserable due to their ED.
Personally, I do have depression/bipolar II, but I don't link it to my ED.
I found that the days that I have lost weight are some of the best days ever.
I love the feeling of being hungry, cold, and especially feeling my bones show.
Though I'm sure the majority of people in this community like those things as well, do you find yourselves unhappy due to your eating disorder?
[Rant/Rave] Welp, I'm currently sitting on the toilet after taking laxatives, while typing up my thesis because I have a deadline tonight... This is my life.
/u/thisthingagain [5'3 | 125.6| 22.76 | 19 | F]
Created: Sun Oct 23 14:55:06 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/590pbh/welp_im_currently_sitting_on_the_toilet_after/
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And I'm not sure if I find it hilarious or terrible or both.
Probably both.
I'm working on my undergrad thesis, which is due Friday. Of course I'm horribly behind, which is partly my fault, partly my advisors since she added an ENTIRE CHAPTER to my thesis. So I've been writing for for between 6-14 hours/day for 2 weeks straight, most days averaging about 10 hours researching and writing. I am finishing up a chapter today, and will be emailing it to my advisor tonight. I still have another chapter to write, an introduction, and an author's commentary on my short story.
fuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuck.
Of course I graze-ate for three days, 1500-1800 calories each day. I've gained 5lbs. FIVE. POUNDS. I'd JUST hit 130 and decided to go to town on pizza and Chinese takeout. Shame.
So, thanks to magnesium citrate, now I'm pooping forever and hoping for the best. But I keep having to poop, which keeps messing up my writing flow. So I'm literally camping out, pantsless, in my bathroom. I even brought a little table in here so I can keep my books with me and just sit on the toilet and type away. It's been about 45 minutes and my leg is numb. Partay.
This has to get some sort of purging award, right? Like, this is some intense dedication.
Sigh.
Wish me luck! Time to go find out about the Soviet Union's gender norms and how they differ from Imperial Russian ones... wooooooooo.
<3.
[Rant/Rave] i was doing so well but then i fucked up :( [rant/rave]
/u/leatherhoff [5"3 | TOO MUCH | ftm]
Created: Sun Oct 23 14:31:03 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/590kuh/i_was_doing_so_well_but_then_i_fucked_up_rantrave/
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i was doing good for once!!!!! not binging!!!!! only had 131 calories for the day and i would have been fine for the rest of the day!!!!!!! but then my mum brings home crisps!!!!!! doritos that she doesnt like!!!!!!!! i dont deserve to eat so i knowwwwwwwwww she was testing me, now that she knows i caved shes gonna know im a horrible monster :( she even told me at one point that i can have some of her crisps too, leaving them in the kitchen where she knows id go for them......... ARgh !!!!!!! i binged!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i felt good for once i was doing well again, finally getting back into restricting!!!! at least i know i can handle it again and ill be good for future, i dont think i should eat at all, the only thing i can eat is the apples left in the fridge cos theyre the only thing that my mum doesnt eat that i do.... im so disappointed. im gonna starve myself/restrict intensely all wweek or longer
[Help] WHAT IS WATER WEIGHT?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Oct 23 14:09:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/590gu3/what_is_water_weight/
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[deleted]
[Other] As if that would stop me fb 😂
/u/Sonnenblumenschein [5'3.5" | 95 lbs | 16.8 | -59 lbs]
Created: Sun Oct 23 14:08:18 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/590gkf/as_if_that_would_stop_me_fb/
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http://imgur.com/nzyj7sL
[Goal] I fit into my goal dress
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Oct 23 13:27:23 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5908u2/i_fit_into_my_goal_dress/
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[deleted]
[Goal] Goal clothes advice
/u/dbishop22
Created: Sun Oct 23 13:19:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5907fw/goal_clothes_advice/
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This might be off topic, but it's becoming a kind of pleasant problem. I'm really petite and getting skinny pretty fast. I live in the second most fat city in America. There are almost no shopping options for me anymore, especially for goal clothes. Where do you guys find extra small clothes that might come in petite as well? Shopping in the children's section is ok for casual wear, but I work as an engineer in a medium conservative environment so there's only so many sparkle jeans and unicorn shirts I can get away with. :/
[Help] I just need some kind words right now.
/u/m_inimal
Created: Sun Oct 23 13:18:32 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/590762/i_just_need_some_kind_words_right_now/
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I haven't 100% come to terms with having an eating problem, and I definitely haven't come to terms with the fact that I look on this subreddit every day, and even post sometimes. It feels like it's someone else doing it, not me; probably because no one in my life knows about it. It's just some weird little vice I have.
So I do feel really odd asking for anyone to reply. But I broke up with my boyfriend the day before yesterday, and I have never felt so lost. I'm on the verge of tears constantly and just feel completely emptied out. It needed to happen, and that's why I did it - I love him, but he wasn't a good partner and we are ill suited to each other, without a doubt. I hope we can be friends, but part of me knows it will be too tempting to slip back into our old ways, especially considering how fragile I know I am right now.
I truly don't feel like there is a healthy way to deal with this kind of pain. I think what most "healthy" people would advise is probably something along the lines of "Take a few days to feel horrible, and then start to piece things back together"; but I know that for me, "taking those few days" would involve lying in bed and eating things I'll feel terrible about later. I'm the type of person who if I indulge in my emotions, I spiral and it starts to feel unmanageable.
This is also the first time I've ever had the urge to hurt myself. I'm definitely not going to do it, because i know people who do and it's scary. I don't want to get accustomed to it. I'm also just inundated with thoughts like "No one would miss me if I was gone", which is hard to take, and reinforced by my belief that my boyfriend is probably doing just fine without me; meanwhile i'm a fucking mess.
So the only way I know how to cope is this weird compromise that is not eating. It's not outright self harm, but it feels like some kind of weird justice or balance. Worthless people shouldn't feel good, and I feel pretty damn worthless right now.
If I had anyone in my life who I could talk to openly about all of this without them panicking or trying to take drastic action, I would. But I don't have my boyfriend anymore, I have no friends, and my family would freak out. So I'm really alone.
Sorry to lay all this out there, I hope it doesn't bum anyone out too much. Writing it down helps me think more clearly about it. And if anyone wants to share their ideas for how I might deal with this, it would be greatly appreciated. <3 Thank you
[Rant/Rave] I Gained 20 Pounds
/u/Shernibop [5'3 | CW 134 | GW 100 | -66]
Created: Sun Oct 23 13:05:32 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5904no/i_gained_20_pounds/
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I'm so ashamed. I recently gained 20 pounds in just a couple short months due to impulsive binge-eating. I feel disgusting, worthless, and terrible. What happened to me? I lost my control. My power. I feel so out of touch with my self and I feel like I haven't been controlling my own body. I'm done. I'm going to lose weight and gain worth again. I'm going to be ok.
[Help] Can't break the binge
/u/Laricia [5'4" | 108 | -2 | GW 95 | F]
Created: Sun Oct 23 12:58:50 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5903bq/cant_break_the_binge/
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I've been eating at maintenance all week, always within the last hour of the day and it feels awful. But I just can't stop. And today it happened – the binge to end all binges (hopefully…). I'm too afraid to count but it's definitely exceeded 3000 cal, I tried to purge but I just can't and now my throat is sore and I'm definitely gaining more than water weight from this. I don't have the luxury of time to work out either. It'll be Monday soon and I really hope it can be a fresh start, but right now I really need a good ass whooping. I've been so stressed all week from uni and throwing everything in sight into my mouth, the stress won't change this coming week but the bingeing needs to stop. I'm sorry this is so negative and whiney but I'm so distressed and my stomach hurts. I'd like to just lie in bed for days until all the calories work out but there's a ton of group projects due and my own incompetence can't be a burden on others. Damn.
What should I eat today?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Oct 23 12:32:03 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58zy9l/what_should_i_eat_today/
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[removed]
[Rant/Rave] I'm having trouble sticking to a routine and it's fucking everything up
/u/lightfeathers [5'4" | CW 112 | GW 95 | F]
Created: Sun Oct 23 10:55:41 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58zghe/im_having_trouble_sticking_to_a_routine_and_its/
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I'm the kind of person who needs routine to feel motivated enough to stick to anything. And when something happens that isn't in my plan, everything goes downhill. By everything, I mean *everything*.
My sleeping pattern gets fucked? Binge. Binge until it's fixed. You binge for one day? Fuck you. You fucked up so go fuck up even more. You miss one weigh-in or you didn't get to count all your calories? Well, you better throw in the towel cause you've ruined the whole day, you greedy bitch.
Why am I like this 😤
[Rant/Rave] "You're so light!"
/u/Melatoninsky [5'3"| CW:104.4 lbs | GW: 99 lbs | F]
Created: Sun Oct 23 10:51:35 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58zfqr/youre_so_light/
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Okay ugh I had to tell someone who would *get it* so I hope posting this is okay.
So I teach performing arts to children, who are notoriously blunt in their judgements. Like some of the things I've heard kids say...lol. ("Miss.M you have three rolls on the left and only two on the right" oh :) :) isn't that :) so funny :) kill me pls.)
Anyway yesterday I was teaching a group and at the end of class a couple of my students hug me to say bye. One of my girls (11 yrs old, about my height but 90lbs) hugs me and then suddenly PICKS ME UP. OFF THE GROUND. I was like (internally panicking) "oh, [child] let's not do that, you could hurt yourself." And she puts me down and goes "pffft you're so light!" And says bye and skips out of class. .......
Guys I don't even know how to feel. Like a kid picked me up? A 90lb kid? Why do I still feel like a land whale?? Don't I look like one? And then "you're so light"? Like part of me is wondering does she sense it somewhere in her little 11 yr old brain that I'm struggling with all this ED shit? Did I DO something to make it obvious? I'm *so* careful about it around the kids, because the last thing I want to do is accidentally fuck them up for life. Especially in the dance world like, I don't want to be *that* teacher who prefers the skinny kids and makes everyone else feel like shit. I never talk about body shape or weight or size or anything. I never tell them how I'm feeling about myself (I mean it would be super unprofessional anyway). There's no way, right? No way some 11 yr old can just... sense all this... right?
And still part of me is like. Holy shit. Light enough to be lifted by a child. Huh. There's a goal I never would've thought of. (Cause it's fucking weird. And dw I did have a chat with her about it being inappropriate to pick up a teacher.)
Ok. End rant.
[Discussion] Daily Food Diary! October 23, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Sun Oct 23 10:02:38 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58z72u/daily_food_diary_october_23_2016/
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This is a daily food diary thread for October 23, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
[Other] Today's deficit
/u/Elope
Created: Sun Oct 23 09:51:05 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58z51a/todays_deficit/
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I binged yesterday. Big time. Don't care to even estimate the damage. Obviously, I told myself today would be better. Obviously, I've already gone off the rails.
When this shit happens I always think to myself, if I don't eat anything for the rest of the day, I'd still have a deficit. I never manage it.
I want to do it today. I want to wake up tomorrow with the comfort of progress. So I guess I'm making this post to be accountable to someone. If I succeed I'll update it at the end of the day.
If not I suppose the wheel just keeps turning.
Edit: I did it.
[Goal] Perfect day
/u/electille [5'7 | 123 | 19.2 | ?]
Created: Sun Oct 23 09:39:35 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58z34y/perfect_day/
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Fasting, late wake-up, free coffee and Pepsi Max, 3hrs of walking, and collecting money for charity...
Dizzy af rn but i am so happy 😍
[Goal] Not much but I'm happy about it!
/u/wanskie [5'5 | cw: 135 | bmi: 22.5 | F]
Created: Sun Oct 23 09:20:00 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58yzvc/not_much_but_im_happy_about_it/
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http://imgur.com/kYtjFf3
[Goal] Weekend update :))))
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Oct 23 09:01:31 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58ywxd/weekend_update/
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[deleted]
[Goal] Almost 3 weeks binge free!
/u/bitsybones [5'2 | 140 | 25.6 | 137 | F]
Created: Sun Oct 23 08:55:48 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58yw1u/almost_3_weeks_binge_free/
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I'm on mobile, so I can't flair.
If I get through today without bingeing, I'll have gone three weeks without a binge, which is the longest I've gone since last year.
I hope to go all of October without a binge. :)
Thank you, green tea and coffee for keeping my appetite suppressed!
[Rant/Rave] bipolarity, binges and drugs.
/u/Lady_Anarchy [169cm | CW: 53kg | GW: 50kg | BMI: 18.56 | F]
Created: Sun Oct 23 08:53:03 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58yvm4/bipolarity_binges_and_drugs/
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Two weeks ago I posted about how happy I was about my successes in starting to feel better about my body. Since then I've taken something of a 180 turn.
I've been alternating between extreme highs and extreme lows (being bipolar). I've stopped sleeping. I've started increasing doses of all substances I take. And that's been making me hungry. And I've started to eat a lot. Like binge-lot. Like gaining 1.5kg in two weeks lot.
I've also started making excuses for myself. But I still hate myself. And I can't stop. I don't know where to turn, and nothing motivates me anymore to try anything. So there goes the positivity.
[Intro] New name, New stat, New start :\
/u/P0Pkornsoup
Created: Sun Oct 23 08:51:28 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58yvbz/new_name_new_stat_new_start/
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Welp, I've been fuggin up. I'm at college and have let alcohol and drunk snacking ruin all my summer progress. I don't even know what I weigh anymore, I'll have to go to the school gym and find out *shudder*
So this is me starting fresh. A classmate told me last night he could tell I've gained weight from drinking this past month. That did it. I feel gross.
Last night I drank half a bottle of tequila and ate 2 family sized bags of popcorn before going to bed, all while planning my calorie restriction for this new week. Not eating isn't even going to be the hardest part, not drinking is :( if I can't drink, how will I get fucked up lol?
Anyhoo, nice to meet you again, I'll post stats when I know them. My old username and stats are no longer relevant. Sigh.
[Help] How did I gain 3 pounds in 2 days??
/u/pinotblanc [5'3 | GW:115 | 23.2 | -23 | F]
Created: Sun Oct 23 08:32:02 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58ysei/how_did_i_gain_3_pounds_in_2_days/
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My friend came in to town on Thursday. I had 3 drinks of low calorie orange juice with tequila and we went out to eat Mexican food. Okay I will admit, not the best day - but I had fasted most days last week and immediately went back to a 500 calorie restriction on Friday and Saturday, drinking green tea and watching what I ate. I also weighed myself on Friday and did not gain or lose any weight.
This morning I weighed myself and gained 3 pounds since Friday. How?? I'm sure *some* is water weight but I doubt 3 pounds of it is.
This is so discouraging. I feel like I'm not allowed to have any fun or else I'll blow up like a balloon. I thought 1 "cheat day" in a month should be fine but instead I gained 3 pounds. 😣
[Rant/Rave] I suck
/u/MhmStephany [5'3" | 179.6 lbs | 32.69 | -10 lbs | F]
Created: Sun Oct 23 07:55:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58yn7l/i_suck/
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I binged two days in a row. TWO. And I've only dropped 10 lbs total. This is so discouraging. I want to punish myself today by fasting but my grandparents invited me for dinner tonight and it's pasta which is a huge triggering food for me. I keep telling myself I HAVE to stay strong if I want to be thin. I can do this. Please send encouraging words. ❤
[Rant/Rave] One good weekend to get on track and I feel like everything is better.
/u/aerienne [5'5" | 145.8 | F]
Created: Sun Oct 23 07:33:50 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58yk9x/one_good_weekend_to_get_on_track_and_i_feel_like/
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I usually work Fridays and Saturdays, but was given a unique 3 day weekend. I told myself this is the perfect time to get back in track. Friday and Saturday I only ate clementines and some mentos. And coffee.
Yesterday I walked around the city for 8 hours. I had my wallet with my and could have bought food at any moment. On the train ride home, I was tempted to go to the store and get vodka. Mind you, I don't drink. Last time I was drunk was exactly 2 years ago and I was very suicidal. I talked myself out of getting black out drink at home because I knew I'd buy shitty food to eat as well. Instead I went home, ate a few clementines, and took myself to a Mozart performance. Much better choice.
Today I slept in and woke up to a much flatter stomach. TMI, but I haven't pooped in days and am hoping a kilo of clementines will help. Knowing I'll be lighter after helps. I've only had coffee today and it's 3:30pm. It's Sunday and no grocery stores are open so I can't buy anything.
I have to remember how much fasting or even restricting helps my anxiety. I'm working from 9-9 tomorrow and Tuesday. I'll have to est in front of people. But I won't overeat. Bare minimum. Then I'm free from work for another week. So much progress can be made.
I know my posts are always long and rambling, but you guys understand. I need to get back down to at least 135 again and life will be better. I'm not throwing my life to shit so that I can start over with the new year. I will be ahead of schedule. I always seem to start the year around 135. It's like my own personal version of hell where I have to repeat it until I get it right.
I also found a doctor here and am getting prescribed Wellbutrin again hopefully. My life fell apart 2 Octobers ago. If I can get through, all will be well.
Thyroxine and weightloss
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Oct 23 06:42:51 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58ydz2/thyroxine_and_weightloss/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] Binging and fasting cycle for the last four years (MFP weight tracking since Feb 2012)
/u/skinnypod [5'6" | 121 | 19.8 | F]
Created: Sun Oct 23 06:38:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58ydib/binging_and_fasting_cycle_for_the_last_four_years/
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http://imgur.com/s6VI3rV
[Help] Those with SOs who know about your disorder, how far into the relationship did you tell them?
/u/Melusedek [173 | CW: 57.5 | GW ?? | 19.21/18.99 | F]
Created: Sun Oct 23 05:03:42 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58y3wm/those_with_sos_who_know_about_your_disorder_how/
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Unnecessary background, feel free to skip if you just want to answer the question in the title.
I have this FWB who I've been with since last December, when this really started to take hold. He's seen my from my HW to my LW with all the fluctuations in between. I've brought up the possibility of a relationship in April but he says he's not a big fan of the "girlfriend" label. Still, we see each other about once a week, usually with some Netflix with our chill (we're both big fans of horror films, and we're currently making our way through Archer).
So last night he came over and I had my laptop open because I had been watching Netflix while browsing reddit (including here). He grabbed my laptop to see what I had been watching and he mentions that my reddit was open (he knows what reddit is and that I spend a lot of time here though he doesn't really browse it himself). I made an over the top reaction to take my laptop back, and he asks if I have any dirty little secrets on there. I said it's just personal stuff.
"Like what kind of personal stuff?"
Guys, I was so close to telling him about this, my issues with food, how I waver between out of control eating and eating nothing at all, but I ended up just saying if I told him it wouldn't be a secret.
I mean, he's not my boyfriend but we've been together for so long it's so tempting. And I've brought up things I would like to fix about myself (like my inability to not interrupt people if we're talking about something I'm excited about), and he's really good about pointing out when I'm doing it and reminding me that it's something I wanted to work on. Plus he's really into lifting weights so we've talked about nutrition and stuff many times.
I so badly want to tell him about this stupid disorder. I want to be able to text him when I'm about to binge so he can tell me not to, but it's not his responsibility to fix me. And I'm worried that he'll force me to eat when I don't want to.
It's so hard for me to be vulnerable with people and ask for help (that's why it took 6 months to even have the relationship talk). And I'm scared he'll say that this is too much for our non-relationship and he'll bail.
Fuck guys, I don't know what to do...
[Other] 'Perhaps we shall learn, as we pass through this age, that the 'other self' is more powerful than the physical self we see when we look into a mirror.' Take strength from your other self to make today a positive day moving towards loving your physical self beauties 💕🎀🌸
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Oct 23 02:46:30 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58xrxq/perhaps_we_shall_learn_as_we_pass_through_this/
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[deleted]
This could so be me 😂
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Oct 23 02:07:44 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58xoqu/this_could_so_be_me/
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http://smallwrites.com/interesting/item/44-man-takes-on-2kg-burger-challenge
[Rant/Rave] In-laws left a bunch of food at our place
/u/scandinaviandreams [6'0" | 131 | 17.93 | F]
Created: Sun Oct 23 02:02:52 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58xoao/inlaws_left_a_bunch_of_food_at_our_place/
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Had my in-laws visit for the weekend, which was nice. (unfortunately I was working for most part) But when I returned home... So much food left in the fridge! 1/2 grilled chicken, 1/2 pecan pie, a whole garlic baguette, and an unopened soda bottle (non diet)
Why, whyyyyyy. Why couldn't you just take the food with you, or eat it? Thankfully I got my husbands permission to throw it all out. So crisis averted!
[Discussion] What do you watch?
/u/RainyDayDaydream [5'6 | ?? | ?? | ?? | Lady]
Created: Sun Oct 23 02:02:30 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58xo9g/what_do_you_watch/
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Hello everyone!
I shoud be studying, but I love to watch YouTube and documentries in my spare time. I often end up watching things relating to food & eating disorders, of course.
So I thought I would ask you all for some suggestions for any YouTube videos/users or documentries/series that relate to those topics!
[Rant/Rave] How many times have you guys had to Chang accounts?
/u/NoiDontWannaTalk [6'0 | 142 | 19.2 | Lost: 15lbs| Male]
Created: Sun Oct 23 01:47:43 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58xmza/how_many_times_have_you_guys_had_to_chang_accounts/
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I'm so fucking sick of having to cover my tracks just because I want to be skinny. It's so fucking unfair, why can't people mind their own fucking business?!? I just dropped to 135.4, the lowest I've been in forever, so why do I need to be paranoid that people will find out? I mean I get it, I'm 6 feet tall, it's not subtle that I'm so thin, but just let me be thin, you know?
Fuck me man, I wish I cared enough about myself to want to recover.
[Thinspo] 5'7 at 114
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Oct 23 00:17:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58xena/57_at_114/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/4fa744a3264242018028339b388ba929?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=02ece9c27884f24a1db185d27092e0fc
[Thinspo] who is considered/used as thinspo but you disagree?
/u/Wordsalad_
Created: Sat Oct 22 22:54:41 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58x4u3/who_is_consideredused_as_thinspo_but_you_disagree/
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Can't flair; mobile
[Rant/Rave] Just found out my room mate has been eating my food.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Oct 22 20:51:55 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58wot4/just_found_out_my_room_mate_has_been_eating_my/
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[deleted]
Have y'all ever said anything to a friend that almost gave away your ED?
/u/IAMABaguetteAMA [5'6" | 106 lbs | 17.0 | 11 lbs | F]
Created: Sat Oct 22 20:28:15 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58wlj4/have_yall_ever_said_anything_to_a_friend_that/
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https://www.reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58wlj4/have_yall_ever_said_anything_to_a_friend_that/
[Tip] How to avoid colon cancer! Be careful lovelies
/u/rukittenmerightnow
Created: Sat Oct 22 19:05:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58w9zz/how_to_avoid_colon_cancer_be_careful_lovelies/
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Guys I just watched an episode of Super Size vs. Super Skinny as thinspo and one of the anorexic girls was showed a photo of someone with colon cancer. There was a large, inoperable tumor blocking the bowel area and it shook me up quite a bit. Apparently, people with EDs are at greater risk if you don't make sure you're getting enough fiber! Be careful you guys I just wanted to put this out here because I care about you all so much.
Love you guys x
[Rant/Rave] [rant] On the verge of crying
/u/EatMyInsides [156cm | CW:48.6kg | 0BMI: 21.00 | Weight Lost: 0.8]
Created: Sat Oct 22 18:43:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58w6q2/rant_on_the_verge_of_crying/
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I'm currently at a friend's house, in bed amd on the verge of crying because I had to eat "normally". I have no idea how many calories I ate today.
I'm sorry about this little rant. I just had to get it pit of my system.
[Goal] NSV: I don't have a thigh gap but...
/u/GingerrWithASoul [5'6 | 124 | 20.09 | -24 | Female]
Created: Sat Oct 22 18:19:59 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58w3b9/nsv_i_dont_have_a_thigh_gap_but/
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Today I was sitting on my steps having a cigarette and I placed my phone on my lap. Normally that's not a problem but today my phone fell through the gap in my thighs! I didn't even think there'd be enough room for that to happen! So this feels like progress and I'm feeling super excited and really need share this small victory with people who understand my excitement!
🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉
Side note: I'm also glad I have a good case on my phone or this victory could've easily been terrible lol
[Goal] NSV: I don't have a thigh gap yet but...
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Oct 22 18:14:20 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58w2gl/nsv_i_dont_have_a_thigh_gap_yet_but/
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[deleted]
[Goal] I can feel my hipbones
/u/ED2134 [168cm | fat | female| -10kg]
Created: Sat Oct 22 18:14:11 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58w2fq/i_can_feel_my_hipbones/
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I lost 10 kg=22 lbs!
I still don't see any difference.. but I'm obese so it will take a while to show. BUT I can feel my hipbones again.. long way to go till I can see them, but at least I can feel them.
[Rant/Rave] Rant about nothing
/u/kickkkasss [5'5 | CW:134 | GW:110 | F]
Created: Sat Oct 22 18:09:36 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58w1p9/rant_about_nothing/
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Okay so feel free to ignore this I just wanna get stuff out of my head. Everything sucks. I recently had my relationship end. Im so lonely I just want to curl up in bed all day and cry. My heart hurts. Because I'm lonely I have days where I eat and eat and it makes me hate myself so so much. I used to talk to my bf about my feelings about food and he'd try his best to make me feel okay and now he's gone and I have no one.
[Other] Accountability
/u/setniessesed [5'11.5" | CW: 141 GW: 130 | 18.71 | -18lbs | 20/F]
Created: Sat Oct 22 17:50:52 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58vypn/accountability/
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I want to try and fast for a couple days (wanna do it as long as I can go really); just feel awful and bloated and hate myself. Wanted to make maybe a daily post for its duration to keep myself accountable. Equipped with lots of tea, coffee, cigs and brokaid. I suck at it unfortunately, so I need all the help I can get. Also have this lovely sub to keep me going <3 (:
Loving seeing the art that's been posted here recently as well, I'd like to join in a bit too ;p I just made this very relevant ink drawing for inktober: http://imgur.com/xDaDVw0
[Thinspo] Sweet dreams are made of Thinspo...
/u/notworthausername [5'7" | 129 | 20.1 | -10 | 26F]
Created: Sat Oct 22 17:46:14 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58vy0a/sweet_dreams_are_made_of_thinspo/
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http://imgur.com/a/1nAM2
[Help] What do you do when it's to cold?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Oct 22 17:33:34 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58vw2r/what_do_you_do_when_its_to_cold/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] I didn't binge! :)
/u/notworthausername [5'7" | 129 | 20.1 | -10 | 26F]
Created: Sat Oct 22 17:29:41 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58vvgl/i_didnt_binge/
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I was craving Pad Thai, so bad. It's 5PM here, and I'd eaten 250 cals so far with cereal and a string cheese. INSTEAD OF GOING TO CARB HELL, I MADE SOMETHING! And now I won't binge because I'm not going to feel guilty that I'm eating shit and therefore won't say "Oh well, since I'm already fucked may as well make it royally."
It made three servings, too at only 330 cals!
1 12.5oz canned chicken
1 can black beans
1 single serving Target garlic-cauliflower package thing
3 egg whites
Pearl onion
S&P, and chili powder
and SALSA!
8g fiber and 32g protein :')
How's your intake been today?
Edit: I've taken 20 minutes so far to eat it and I still have some left to go, with a giant glass of water.
[Rant/Rave] Being Healthy
/u/K_iwi
Created: Sat Oct 22 15:53:53 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58vg1c/being_healthy/
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I kind of really hate when people on here say stuff like "reach your goal but be healthy about it!"
This isnt a weight loss sub. This is an eating disorder sub. Theres nothing healthy about eating disorders. They (or mine at least) are destructive and nowhere near healthy. If i could 'be healthy' about it I would be in a fucking heartbeat. Its less about meeting my goal and more about proving to myself and everybody else that I have the strength and discipline to reach my goal. I want to restrict and exercise obsessively without people telling me to worry about protein or aspartme (???).
This isnt just this sub- I see it on other 'pro ed' sites too. Its such a stupid thing to get angry about, but I do and I just had to rant about it. Im tired of people telling me to be healthy about my fucking *eating disorder*.
[Tip] Halo top on sale at ralphs
/u/-lotophagi- [5'6" | 127lbs | 20 | -8lbs | F]
Created: Sat Oct 22 15:48:55 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58vf8e/halo_top_on_sale_at_ralphs/
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I got 2 flavors. Woohooo. Just... thought I'd share.
Maybe this will help curb my binging. What're your favorites? I got vanilla and lemon cause they had the lowest cal.
Mobile so can't flare
[Rant/Rave] Nothing quite like going to a party and seeing a guy you slept with turn up with a tiny french girl :)))
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Oct 22 14:50:50 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58v5em/nothing_quite_like_going_to_a_party_and_seeing_a/
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[deleted]
Pro Ana Kik Group Open!
/u/syntheticseasalt
Created: Sat Oct 22 14:14:43 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58uzan/pro_ana_kik_group_open/
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Hi kids, a few friends and i are looking for new members for our kik group.
We have a few rules (16+, stay on topic in the chat, etc) but everyone in the chat is quite friendly and we would love a few new members. Kik me @ syntheticseasalt and we'll chat so i can eventually add you!
💓
[Help] Buying a scale after not having one for months ....scared
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Oct 22 14:01:49 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58ux0l/buying_a_scale_after_not_having_one_for_months/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] it feels so weird
/u/hereyesarethesky [5'6" | 128.2 | 20.78 | -27]
Created: Sat Oct 22 13:47:29 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58uujb/it_feels_so_weird/
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I started out at 156-160 pounds, my BMI was considered overweight, and I hated myself and how I looked all the time.
Started losing weight, was feeling better about my body as I continued to drop pounds. I have lost 20 pounds in 4-5 months.
I've been at a plateau (136-138 lbs) for two or three weeks now, and it's my fault because I've been very messy with my eating but I'm thankful I haven't gained back into the 140s.
i feel weird because i was feeling really confident in my body while losing weight and now that ive been stuck at this weight for a little bit.. i can see my measurements are smaller than before but nothing really changed? im just a scaled down version of 156 lb me. my stomach still has the pouch thing that's always there and i have to suck it in, my arms are still fat looking even though they've technically gotten smaller, and even though there is definitely a gap starting to form in my legs i can still push them together. im the exact same just a different number and i with probably be the same until i hit below 125.
tldr; I just feel like a scaled down version of fatter me and wanted to vent about it
[Thinspo] Daily thinspo
/u/BlackGirlSteeze
Created: Sat Oct 22 13:47:16 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58uui4/daily_thinspo/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/ddc0d7b6ceb94d76ab1a714a2f3299d2?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=ac1038ccd54a40ec7c8fef2dfc09f7f4
[Goal] from 195 to 160 in 3 months.
/u/Sighgal
Created: Sat Oct 22 13:46:18 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58uuba/from_195_to_160_in_3_months/
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🌟🌟
[Rant/Rave] At least I logged the binge...
/u/EmpireStateBitch [5'4" | CW 120 | GW 115 | UGW 100 | F]
Created: Sat Oct 22 13:30:06 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58urib/at_least_i_logged_the_binge/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/0611290e90cd4738bdee8554a85797a1?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=8c29efbaea5b73918852a66e407c63f6
[Rant/Rave] Just venting so I don't eat!
/u/ThroeAwaymeron [5'2" | 104.4 | 19.78 | F]
Created: Sat Oct 22 13:05:34 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58un3t/just_venting_so_i_dont_eat/
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Just gotta get this out of my head since I can't say it anywhere else!
I live in a house broken up into apartments, and my bedroom is right off the kitchen. In some ways this is awesome. It's towards the back of the house, so it's quiet, it's a big room, it's easy to sneak in and out of grabbing a bite to eat without feeling embarrassed because someone can see what I'm eating (this one can be really good or really bad, of course).
My roommates don't normally cook much but today one of them is making something that smells amaaaaaaazing and it's drifting in here and it's killing me! I actually ate way too much yesterday so I don't know why my stupid body thinks it's so hungry right now. On top of that, I have my dinner planned out for later (prelogging cals is king) and I know I'll need the oven he's using, so I'll be eating later than usual.
I'm thinking of going out for a little while so I'm not breathing in good smells, but I did *just* tell him that I'm staying in doing classwork all day since it's rainy, lol...maybe a walk to the convenience store for diet soda (am I a stereotype or what)...
[Help] "Controlled" cheat days
/u/morose_adipose [5'2 | 90 lbs | 17.05 | F]
Created: Sat Oct 22 13:02:22 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58umib/controlled_cheat_days/
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I'm trying something today, to try to head off any binge urges.
I restrict all week, around 500 calories or lower and I eat a ketogenic diet. I've lost over 100 lbs doing this, but lately, basically since dropping to "underweight" binging has become a thing. Pretty much only on the weekends. The cravings for something sweet become so powerful I can't think or do anything else until I quell them. Which, as soon as I eat even the smallest sweet, I get drowned in shame and sorrow until I feel so horrible I eat everything in sight. I tell myself I've ruined everything and then I shame eat all weekend. Mondays I start over, do well all week and then repeat the horrors of the previous weekend.
Well, I decided to take a different approach this weekend and "allow" myself a controlled cheat day. I've set a calorie limit (2,000) to maintain a semblance of control, but anything I want and can fit in there I'm going to allow. For one day. So far so good. I'm at about 1,300 for the day but I have consumed like ten days worth of carbs, and that is making me anxious. So, maybe not so far, so good? I'm trying to keep the "well, you've fucked up everything anyways may as well eat that gallon of ice cream and 17 bags of Skittles" voice away.
Don't really know where I'm going with this. Guess I hope someone can tell me it's okay, I haven't ruined everything. Maybe if there is anyone here that is knowledgeable about the keto diet, they can tell me falling off the wagon once in a while isn't the end of the world just because I've kicked myself out of ketosis.
Would love to hear about how everyone else incorporates cheat days and if they help you resist binging.
TL;DR: I ate oreos and my "I'm fine, everything is fine" facade is starting to crack. Halp.
[Thinspo] Have a Skinny Saturday :)
/u/The_Marshmallow_Test [5'5 | CW:dont weigh :3| GW:skinny arms| F]
Created: Sat Oct 22 12:57:23 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58ulmf/have_a_skinny_saturday/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/77465cebcb0949ebab0191d81633a218?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=e5ed5338b80b6d5acf85a37dc6c0b2ad
[Other] I love waking up after a night of restricting + drinking
/u/cinamintoast [5'7" | 184 | 28.72 | -86lb | F]
Created: Sat Oct 22 12:53:06 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58ukux/i_love_waking_up_after_a_night_of_restricting/
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I know it's mostly just due to dehydration but I always lose like 3 pounds after a night of drinking as long as I don't eat anything. It usually goes back up by the following day but seeing a number that low really motivates me.
[Intro] I've lurked here for months, it's time I admit why.
/u/-kaneki-ken- [5'7" | CW 129 | GW 120 | 20.2 | 22F]
Created: Sat Oct 22 12:13:01 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58uds3/ive_lurked_here_for_months_its_time_i_admit_why/
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Hello, ProEd. I finally made a throwaway to use on this subreddit. I've been browsing this thread since I found it in June, reading every single post, quietly handing out upvotes. I'm posting today because I believe it's time to admit that both my eating and thought patterns are (or at least seem, to me) disordered. It's gonna be a novel, and you don't have to read it. I guess I'm using this as a platform to put words to this weird cycle. Thank you all for providing a safe community where this is okay.
So here's a quick intro: Without giving you the whole sob story, I have a history of self harm (9 years of cutting and counting), have been diagnosed with major depressive disorder, and have been hospitalized for a suicide attempt within the last 5 years. Some of this has, in retrospect, probably made me susceptible to disordered eating patterns, especially the self-harm "guilt and punishment" thought dynamic. Anyway.
In May when I graduated college I weighed 156 lbs. Four pounds from real-life, overweight BMI. I bought a scale, started running, and used MFP to stick to a strict 1200 calorie diet. My initial goal was to get back down to my high school weight of 138. Running three miles a day on top of my deficit, I achieved this goal by late July, but by then my mindset had changed completely.
After seeing the first 10 pounds go, I knew I never wanted to stop. I couldn't look at food the same. I woke up to the fatlogic I was surrounded by, the obesity epidemic and laziness and lack of self control that are destroying my country. I liked feeling superior, feeling like I had real control, that I was getting skinnier (and therefore less like my fellow bovine Americans) every day. More than that, I liked feeling like I consumed less, needed less, and was more efficient than my consumerist culture's average joe. It was about aesthetics, sure, and to some degree it still is, but more than that it's about discipline. I will not be deluded by fatlogic, by the "treat yo self", HAES, Fat Acceptace culture we're cultivating while most of the world starves. I will not be your "fat American".
So, anyway. I reset my goals: weight of less than 130, for the first time since 8th grade. By August, I made it to 127/128. But, of course, it isn't enough (or, stated otherwise, it's still too much).
This is where the disordered pattern kicks in. Recently my lifestyle has changed dramatically. During the initial weight loss I was living with my long-term boyfriend, whose careful watch kept me from doing anything too extreme. Well, we broke up, I moved two states away to a place with mountains and actual scenery, and went from a jobless and sedentary lifestyle (other than my daily run) to working a full-time physical labor job and hiking/biking/skating whenever I had free daylight. Cue the sudden binges...
For the first two weeks, I was "in maintenance", trying not to panic about no longer losing, but in reality I was losing my mind over suddenly being so hungry and eating whatever, whenever. At night, after having three full meals already, I would come home to my empty apartment and mindlessly scarf down 3000 calories in 30 minutes, eating a half a loaf of bread, two pints of ice cream, staring mindlessly into space and thinking "This hurts, I want to stop, I'm so full", all the while ripping open more packaging, swallowing without chewing, completely and mentally vacant while my hands shoved food in my face. It was literally nauseating and absolutely terrifying.
Of course, after a binge like that, the guilt was unbearable. I don't purge for fear of fucking up my teeth and throat, so instead I restrict. Each binge is paid for by five consecutive sub-1000 calorie days. It has to be, or else I'm going to gain all that weight back. This, of course, sets me up to be so hungry I can't stand it, and then, when no one is looking, I sit in front of my fridge like a zombie eating double decker veggie burgers and literally sobbing.
Anyway. I think I'm painting a picture you'll all recognize. By the end of the first two weeks of this new lifestyle the scale said 133, and I cried in front of the mirror. Restrict, restrict, consume less, work harder.
Today I woke up at 129, but it isn't good enough. I'm back to 1200 cals a day, and so far no crazy binges this week. I know it isn't restriction like some of you are capable of, but I'm so scared of going back to that animalistic binge-zone where I physically can't stop myself from eating serving after serving of food I don't even want. I'm not buying food to keep in my apartment anymore. Too tempting.
Next I'm aiming for under 120, which would put my BMI under 20. Maybe then my waist will look proportional to my arms and legs. As of now, a few things are really bothering me. One, my scale has become inaccurate. Lately it's been reading 123, 125, when I know that's a fucking lie. I'm 129 at the very least, if not closer to 131. Just typing that hurts. Seeing any number beginning with 13X makes me tear up, when just six months ago that was my big-time goal. Secondly, I work as a prep cook, and we throw away massive amounts of food every day. My binge-brain cannot stand it. I save donuts, biscuits, cinnamon rolls.. I track it all, but I've usually consumed around 1000 cals by noon every day.
This has turned into a rant. I have so much to say to you people that I've been saving up for months. Thanks again for letting me join in the discussion. I hope I've followed all the rules, and I hope you all have a great day. Let's all make ourselves better today.
[Help] What scale do you use?
/u/RetailSlaveNo1 [5'2 | CW 164.8 | GW 95 | 31.22]
Created: Sat Oct 22 11:54:04 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58ua9r/what_scale_do_you_use/
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I've been wanting to upgrade my scale to an accurate, not crappy one. What one do you use?
Bathroom scale
[Tip] Beware Being Cold!
/u/HiccupKitten [5'4" I 110.8 I 19.0 I -5 lbs I F]
Created: Sat Oct 22 11:47:47 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58u95c/beware_being_cold/
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Just a note of a thing I'd noticed -
I'll often have urges to eat when my body is cold, and be less motivated to do tasks too, often without noticing my body is cold...it just becomes "HEY EAT SO YOU CAN FOCUS AGAIN".
I've just put on 2 hoodies and sweatpants over my leggings, and can focus again / don't want to eat. :)
So like, just a reminder! Hot hot drinks, stay bundled, especially for those of us who have winter approaching!
[Meme/Humor] me irl
/u/vomitdogs [5'1 | 107 lbs | 20.1 | F]
Created: Sat Oct 22 11:35:28 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58u6zr/me_irl/
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http://i.imgur.com/uY6EjkK.gif
[Other] i am so surprised that i don't gain weight from the extra calories from the amount of gum i chew every single day.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Oct 22 10:52:16 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58tzaa/i_am_so_surprised_that_i_dont_gain_weight_from/
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https://www.reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58tzaa/i_am_so_surprised_that_i_dont_gain_weight_from/
[Help] How to eat at maintenance without overeating/gain?
/u/yummmies [5'4" | 120 | -45 | F]
Created: Sat Oct 22 10:19:52 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58ttks/how_to_eat_at_maintenance_without_overeatinggain/
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Looking for advice on how to eat at maintenance for a short/medium amount of time without overeating. I need to take some time to attempt to fix my newly developed, life ruining insomnia, and I just can't afford to restrict. The biggest issue is that I am so exhausted all the time that I can't bring myself to care about anything, and I would just eat mindlessly or overeat without realizing it, or worse, I do realize it and I don't care until later. Any ideas?
edit: Also, does anyone who has depression wanna chime in on the insomnia? All my googling skills has told me that maybe I'm starting to develop depression and anxiety, but it might be due to my sleeping issues which could result from depression and anxiety? I'm really not understanding this.
[Discussion] Daily Food Diary! October 22, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Sat Oct 22 10:02:30 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58tqi1/daily_food_diary_october_22_2016/
---
This is a daily food diary thread for October 22, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
[Rant/Rave] Under 120 finally!!
/u/frailraven [5'10 | CW 117 | LW 115 | F20]
Created: Sat Oct 22 09:52:51 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58toqb/under_120_finally/
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http://i.imgur.com/qOIf6D8.jpg
[Help] lanugo
/u/clamshells [5'7 | 115 | 18.0 | f]
Created: Sat Oct 22 09:36:29 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58tmbu/lanugo/
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those of you who have developed lanugo, where/when did you first notice it?
i can't tell if i'm looking more closely at my face than usual, or if i'm actually getting fine, short hairs on the upper half of my forehead. like, down to half an inch above my eyebrows. does this sound like lanugo to anyone -- is it limited to the arms or can it appear on the face? if so, how do i fix it? i'm pretty horrified right now :(
[Rant/Rave] "She was tiny when I married her"
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Oct 22 09:25:32 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58tkph/she_was_tiny_when_i_married_her/
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[deleted]
[Discussion] Living with family: how do you do it?
/u/woollyshirt [5'7.7 | 116.4lbs | 17.69 | -77.6lbs | M/NB]
Created: Sat Oct 22 09:24:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58tkli/living_with_family_how_do_you_do_it/
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I'm 19, moving out soon, and have lived independently before, as well as having gone to boarding school and been in foster care so I'm certainly used to taking care of myself, but I find my family situation regarding food a little unusual so I'm curious if this is an ED thing or a dysfunctional family/dysfunctional me thing.
I cook entirely for myself. I don't eat food that my parents prepare and they don't eat mine. It helps that they love creamy cheesy meat dishes and I like salads and lentils and avoiding animal products where I can, but now I don't even sit down and eat with them unless it's someone's birthday.
My family have a 'family dinner' prepared by my stepmum every night and I've already eaten and gone back upstairs at that point. It's not unusual for her to take control and make a cooked breakfast and pack a lunch for my dad and sibling(s) either, depending on who's here, but I don't even factor into that now... effectively I feel like a lodger in my own home, and no one questions it. Family grocery shopping frequently involves me walking to the supermarket with my dad's card, buying what I want (and anything they need) and him giving me a lift home.
This really can't be normal, can it? Is anyone else's home situation like this?
[Discussion] Who makes all these thinspo pics?
/u/Sonnenblumenschein [5'3.5" | 95 lbs | 16.8 | -59 lbs]
Created: Sat Oct 22 08:25:33 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58tc8s/who_makes_all_these_thinspo_pics/
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I mean like, there are tons of them, who made all of those, why are they made, is there a market for this, who are the models, how did they become thinspo models, etc? So many questions, it's so weird when you think about it.
I WANNA KNOW
[Rant/Rave] My self control is gone when he's around
/u/bookofbluesysaturday [5'7 | 141 | GW:115 | -31 | F]
Created: Sat Oct 22 07:28:47 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58t4jg/my_self_control_is_gone_when_hes_around/
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So my fiance came into town yesterday. I fasted 3/5 days during the week to prepare, trying to get into the 130s before he got here, but it didn't work out. Whatever. So he gets here and we get burritos. I can manage. I tell myself that's it for me for the day. We go to waffle house with friends, I resist. I feel strong and happy.
We go out to the mall, and I decide that I NEED a cookie, like right that exact moment. He wants a brownie, then two because they have a new flavor, and then we end up with 4 because they were having a buy-3-get-1 deal and I make terrible decisions. So I eat two cookies and half a brownie, putting me at roughly 1700 for the day. I feel like shit from all the sugar, we decide we need something to settle our stomachs. We get Chinese. We split an already low cal entree, but I still shouldn't have eaten anything at all.
I ate the remaining two brownies as soon as I woke up this morning. I hate myself. I don't always let go like this when we're together, but I never do when I'm alone. I want to fast the whole upcoming week but I already have a few food events planned that I can't cancel. Maybe I'll just only eat then.
[Help] Runners! Questions - help?
/u/FaithHopeTrick [5'7 | CW 123 GW 119 |19.20 | -32lbs | F]
Created: Sat Oct 22 07:13:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58t2l0/runners_questions_help/
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Hey so it's been suggested to me that as I can't afford a gym I should start running. I don't know much about running.
Is there a good app I can get?
How much should I aim for first time?
How many days a week do I need to do it?
What areas (if any) will this help to tone?
Anything else you think might help me.
Thanks lovelies
Also mobile can't flair
Weekend plans?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Oct 22 07:04:33 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58t1c7/weekend_plans/
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[deleted]
[Help] Peanut sauce!!
/u/DenyMyHunger [5'7"| Fat! | UGW:112| F]
Created: Sat Oct 22 06:47:23 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58syzk/peanut_sauce/
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I really want to make peanut sauce but all the recipes are either calorie bombs or need loads of ingredients! Does anyone have a recipe that's peanut butter, soy sauce and maybe just 1 or 2 other ingredients? I'm making it with shiritaki noodles so it doesn't have to be super low cal, just reasonable! Thanks lovelies!
[Discussion] 'Stupid Questions' Saturday! October 22, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Sat Oct 22 06:02:36 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58stlz/stupid_questions_saturday_october_22_2016/
---
This is the weekly 'Stupid Questions' Saturday thread for October 22, 2016.
Use this thread as an opportunity to ask any questions you might have that you feel don't necessarily warrant their own post.
Please be wary of false advice and information. Be sure to research the facts before taking anyone's advice, no matter who they are. Remember that diagnosing members is unacceptable. **Anyone looking for medical guidance should seek the opinion of a medically licensed professional.**
*****
Have any questions or concerns? Comment below, or [PM the mods.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FproED)
[Rant/Rave] I'm not even restricting, and all I can think about is my next meal.
/u/kpatable [5'9" | 127.4 | 18.5/18.8 | -19.6 | F]
Created: Sat Oct 22 05:49:20 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58ss7t/im_not_even_restricting_and_all_i_can_think_about/
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I have BED, and to manage it I eat around 1700 calories a day. My TDEE is around 2000. I have two meals a day, both around the evening. This works best for me. But like, I find it hard to do anything before I eat because I feel no motivation to do anything except eat. But then I feel too tired to do anything after I eat and often just end up sleeping. I freaking hate this. Ugh. Idek.
[Goal] I'm feeling firmer again and my running pants are falling down.
/u/smokesanddietcokes [Adipose Industries]
Created: Sat Oct 22 03:43:27 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58sfva/im_feeling_firmer_again_and_my_running_pants_are/
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I'm now about a month after my out of control binge-fest (which lasted a month or just over itself), and back to restricting.
I'm not weighing myself for a few months because I know it will only serve to freak me out, but I really think I am feeling firmer.
I will never look totally firm and tight, with all the loose skin, but I am feeling hard muscle again underneath the flabby, soft skin covering my body instead of just feeling too-many layers of squidgy fat. Still too much fat there though.. but less.
And my running pants. They were too big before the binge fest, but fit after it. I ran in them today, and was pulling them up every few metres. Thankfully, I still have smaller pairs to run in.
I'm pleased with this feeling, as I figured with my cheats on Sundays my TDEE evened out at maintenance. Still, I low carb/fast all week and my Sunday cheats are carbs (so *hopefully* some go to restoring glycogen rather than fat storage, which I then *hopefully* lose quickly after with activity and fasting), and I don't factor in my exercise or strength training (and therefore possible muscle gain) into TDEE or anything. Plus I do have a habit of logging an overestimation of calories, to protect against *under* estimating..
I'm happy to trust the saggy pants for now, and keep trying to do better at restricting, and losing this horrible, horrible flab.
[Rant/Rave] I doubt the Guinness Book of World Records would care...
/u/insigniania [5'7 | CW: 112 | 17.5 | F |]
Created: Sat Oct 22 03:20:22 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58sdsm/i_doubt_the_guinness_book_of_world_records_would/
---
But I am pretty sure I hold the world record for having the largest thigh circumference while being underweight and having a thigh gap (actual full leg gap). Stupid fucking wide hips. Stupid fucking weird body. \drunkrant
[Rant/Rave] Sudden three days of binges - a recap
/u/MommyTemple [5'9 | SW: 171 | CW: 146 | -25 | NB]
Created: Sat Oct 22 00:38:04 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58ryu4/sudden_three_days_of_binges_a_recap/
---
I have so much to talk about it's almost unheard of...
On Wednesday, everything was going well as usual. I got home from uni, ate my planned dinner, but I didn't feel satisfied like I should have. My sweet tooth acted up, so I decided to have another bowl of breakfast and exercise it off/skip supper. Unfortunately, it all went downhill pretty fast. Soon, I was in the kitchen, going through anything I could find that was allowed on the elimination diet plan. Next, I was on my way to the store to get more snacks, then I finally made it to the library, followed by another visit to the market. I ate a few items simultaneously, alternating between sweet and savory cause that's what my brain kept telling me.
Thursday went down similar road: I was doing okay until I got back home and stuffed in as much snacks as possible before I packed my actual dinner and other stuff for my night at SO's place. There, I had my dinner on top of the goddamn snacks, then I lost my mind completely and I said yes to whiskey and diet coke, and then wine later. Messy.
Yesterday, I just went full crazy. I returned home around 1 PM, after visiting the store, and it was nothing but food from there. Huge dinner, then big bowl of popcorn, jelly sweets, chocolate made with dates, coconut oil and cocoa, nut mix, all of the gluten-free bread I could find with tofu, any fruit that caught my eye. It went on for hours, almost non-stop. At one point, I felt very lightheaded, and I thought "yep, that's it, beetus is out to get me now". My stomach was bursting.
I tried to identify what the actual fuck happened. I went from literally the most disciplined I've ever been to a total unstable mess in a matter of hours. I know my triggers more or less and none of them made a cameo lately, so I can't blame anything 100%. Life's been really ok, even too good at times. Could that be it? My brain went bananas because it's not used to genuine good times? I wouldn't be surprised.
All that's left is to learn something from this: food, no matter how tasty at first, is not worth the bloat, pain, gases, diarrhea and ultimately weight gain. Sorry for being so blunt, but yeah. TMI GROSS you should see my toilet. It's absurd how filthy it is now thanks to being forced to visit too often. Even my mom asked me wtf have I been flushing to make it like this. Yeah, I also flushed a pretty disgusting beet salad I couldn't stomach that also didn't fit into my daily calories limits, but it's mostly the diarrhea. I estimate I gained a pound of fat, which I will lose, but it shouldn't have happened in the first place. But what I suffered through just for a short lived taste and high? Nope, don't wanna do that again. Especially now that I know what it feels like to get through a day without ANY digestive issues. For Christ's sake, I'm this close to losing whole 20 pounds. 20!!! I can't remember the last time I did that. I can lose another 20 easily if I just keep up the discipline. I can do it by the end of this year. I WILL do it.
Other than that, thanks to very honest talks with SO that happened all through this whole week, I feel motivated like never before. Not just to lose weight, but to live, really live, not just exist. For the first time, I have a future and goals that I know I can achieve, and I even know how. I know what to do, what work I have to do, and nothing, no one can change that or distract me. It's amazing. It's also fascinating how my restricting goes hand in hand with real productivity and positivity while binging is the total opposite.
Right now, I'm focusing on the next thing to do so that I won't scare myself with the bigger picture. Today, I have to wash my hair. Clean my room. Throw out the food I couldn't finish yesterday. Go normal grocery shopping. Plan out the upcoming week. Take it day after day, step after step.
If you made it here, thank you so much for reading. This place is my sanctuary honestly. My favourite subreddit ever. I love you all people. Maybe this will help someone not binge today? I hope so. Stay lovely xo
TL;DR I start bingeing out of the blue for three days, mess up my progress, my insides and my toilet, but get out of it with newfound motivation
[Other] That moment when the only thing keeping you from getting up and having a massive binge is the cat sleeping between your legs
/u/KajaIsForeverAlone [height:5'9 | CW: 147 BMI:21 | weight lost:15 lbs | Gender: F]
Created: Fri Oct 21 23:57:18 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58rugc/that_moment_when_the_only_thing_keeping_you_from/
---
https://i.reddituploads.com/09da54db38f24dbbb4bb17aa5b808d0a?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=1ff9162b5bf46f0b07d6b51951f3068d
[Thinspo] Album of my daily thinspo. ♥‿♥
/u/wanskie [5'5 | cw: 135 | bmi: 22.5 | F]
Created: Fri Oct 21 23:09:15 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58rp6w/album_of_my_daily_thinspo/
---
http://imgur.com/a/VCsSj
[Rant/Rave] I hate it when people make you eat even when you're not hungry
/u/KajaIsForeverAlone [height:5'9 | CW: 147 BMI:21 | weight lost:15 lbs | Gender: F]
Created: Fri Oct 21 22:34:17 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58rkuy/i_hate_it_when_people_make_you_eat_even_when/
---
It's so stupid. Like i asked if I could go to the gym earlier, but my mom said no and everyone decided to go out for dinner. They were like "what do you want to order" and I was like "I'm not hungry" which was the truth. But they insisted I eat and my mom was like "you need to eat, go eat some cheese, you need protein"
Anyone else know what I mean?
[Other] Creepy guy on sub?
/u/witchy2628
Created: Fri Oct 21 22:00:07 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58rgev/creepy_guy_on_sub/
---
Is anyone else getting creepy messages from a guy referencing your Ana posts, and asking for pics? Can we ban him? Is that a thing?
[Rant/Rave] Recovered and gained a shitton
/u/CutTheCakee [5'6" | 133 lbs | 21.6 | F]
Created: Fri Oct 21 21:58:55 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58rg9a/recovered_and_gained_a_shitton/
---
I'm supposed to be "healthy" but I honestly feel as bad now as I did when I purged daily. Sinking back into restriction again
[Thinspo] My thinspo - Edie Sedgwick
/u/Comeheredia
Created: Fri Oct 21 20:56:32 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58r803/my_thinspo_edie_sedgwick/
---
http://imgur.com/a/0S9ZV
[Discussion] Lies I tell myself
/u/Alexa1p [5'5'' | 110 | 18 | -10.7 | F]
Created: Fri Oct 21 20:10:47 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58r1i8/lies_i_tell_myself/
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"Being thinner will make him love me more."
"I'm not that fat, I deserve [insert highly caloric, delicious food]."
"Go ahead and eat even though it isn't noon yet, you can make up for it by eating less later."
Anyone else?
[Rant/Rave] I binged twice today. Second dinner.
/u/neuro-fuzzy [5'6.3| CW: 115 ☹ | BMI: ??? | LW 98 | GW 108 | 20F]
Created: Fri Oct 21 19:56:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58qzfr/i_binged_twice_today_second_dinner/
---
http://imgur.com/a64S7R3
[Intro] first post. not my first rodeo. fuck, i've let mself go
/u/HUMANDlSASTER [5'9 | sw: 155 | cw: 149 | gw: 105 | F]
Created: Fri Oct 21 19:52:51 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58qyx7/first_post_not_my_first_rodeo_fuck_ive_let_mself/
---
hi
been struggling with an eating disorder since 2012. since then two of my good friends have been diagnosed with anorexia. one was hospitalised and the other is so thin i'm amazed she's still at university.
my lowest weight is 130 which is currently 19lb away. i need to stopdrinking. i try to log everything but i keep telling myself "oh, tomorrow you won't eat" and then i wake up and eat. it's disgusting. i repulse myself. covered in cellulite and flab,, i can grab handfuls of my stomach because i'm so huge. genuinely amazed i don't fucking burst out of my clothes.
i am going home for Christmas around 15th December. before then i want to be 130lb. i know it's still gross etc but it might make me feel a little better. i've been at uni for a term now and only lost 6lb bc i keep binging - i live alone all my friends threw me out. i've got no excuses any more.
:( i don't know how i've got this huge. and every time i get down to about 142 and then binge again?! why am i so fucking weak. i used to be so strong. i've been losing and gaining the same 10-15lb for years now. i've been making the same posts on mpa for years.
its time. aiming for 800 cals a day - i know it's a lot but then hopefully i won't binge. might try to go sober for as long as possible nd see how much weight i lose
[Rant/Rave] I feel like I don't know what's real or not anymore
/u/tallskinnywannabe8
Created: Fri Oct 21 19:51:42 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58qyrn/i_feel_like_i_dont_know_whats_real_or_not_anymore/
---
I feel like everyone hates me and that I'm a burden. But then I think that it might all be in my head and I'm fine. I've wound myself into so many circles that I feel like I don't know what's what. Does anybody else ever feel this way?
[Discussion] what do ya'll drink?
/u/get-it_together [5'3 |160??| UGW 125 | F]
Created: Fri Oct 21 19:47:52 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58qy82/what_do_yall_drink/
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I live on coke zero, powerade zero, vitamin water zero, coffee, etc, but what else do ya'll usually drink? I want to switch it up. I just got some cranberry sprite zero that I'm too excited to try which is really sad lmfao
[Thinspo] Makeup Thinspo.
/u/BlackGirlSteeze
Created: Fri Oct 21 18:59:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58qr46/makeup_thinspo/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/945be8eb2dda4a54932bd6dbd6c6aacc?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=12a2e8dc4b0f4ba139c275e1cf36775d
[Thinspo] Makeup Thinspo.
/u/BlackGirlSteeze
Created: Fri Oct 21 18:59:19 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58qr1t/makeup_thinspo/
---
https://i.reddituploads.com/9369f802796948809a3e62d0b8870f91?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=89eda2be320a2d4475c901a85590fd69
[Thinspo] Makeup Thinspo.
/u/BlackGirlSteeze
Created: Fri Oct 21 18:58:13 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58qqwd/makeup_thinspo/
---
https://i.reddituploads.com/0b6e6b91cba5456d9a37b10ca1c1f07b?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=5fadd570f90223841629e5d3ac8ce42e
[Thinspo] Makeup thinspo.
/u/BlackGirlSteeze
Created: Fri Oct 21 18:57:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58qqtq/makeup_thinspo/
---
https://i.reddituploads.com/3bae1ef97de94797b15b9605cdfba82a?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=aa04b48c6f46c53562ee4982019e75f7
[Thinspo] Daily thinspo. I left for a few weeks. Did anyone notice?
/u/BlackGirlSteeze
Created: Fri Oct 21 18:51:02 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58qpus/daily_thinspo_i_left_for_a_few_weeks_did_anyone/
---
https://i.reddituploads.com/b121320280994d158cbba69dedb10180?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=ee4d60c0ee7adb17f69c16ecaaf7d102
[Discussion] Life is a mystery, everyone must stand alone. I hear you call my name. And it feels like home.
/u/unseenunloved
Created: Fri Oct 21 18:19:56 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58qkxa/life_is_a_mystery_everyone_must_stand_alone_i/
---
Just purged hard until it hurt for the first time in I can't remember how long. And I don't care, or feel guilty, or feel scared. I'd forgotten the lovely feeling of losing all control to this. Takes all the worry away. Makes the pain beautiful again.
Tagged as discussion because I would appreciate hearing your stories of relapse.
[Rant/Rave] When people ask what you have plan for over Fall Break
/u/toastyhigh [5'4 | 105.6| F]
Created: Fri Oct 21 18:03:42 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58qia5/when_people_ask_what_you_have_plan_for_over_fall/
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The girl that lives in the room next to me is (im 99% sure) leaving for break~ meaning I have the bathroom we share allllll to myself to purge as much as I want....
[Rant/Rave] OMFG I did it!!
/u/chipmunknutter [5'10"| CW | 21.2 | maintenance | F]
Created: Fri Oct 21 17:41:07 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58qekn/omfg_i_did_it/
---
This may not mean much to anyone but I had to share. I've had the shittiest of shit weeks. Today I honestly felt like the universe was playing a sick joke on me. Literally every Friday for the past year or probably more I have compulsively bought nuts and C&Sed for hours. Today...I wanted nothing more than to go home, no urge to C&S, didn't even freaking care, just wanted to sit in a corner and cry about how the world ruined my day and get home to my dogs so they could brighten the day. Instead...I went shopping as I usually do. I walked in to store #1...lines at every register down the aisles. You know what? F this! I feel like crap and am not standing in this line to waste money on food that I don't even want to be C&Sing. Store #2...I grab items I actually need, I load up with nuts and pause. I was on the phone with my mom and she always reminds me when I mention nuts "they make your stomach hurt, remember, no more nuts" (she doesn't know about the C&S but nuts do make my stomach hurt). You know what mom? You're right. I put them back. I paused, I picked a bag back up, put them back, left with the items I actually needed, if pumpkin spice granola is a need :) I honestly am that exhausted and am exhausted with work and life and people and maybe honestly I'm exhausted with this dumb weekly habit and despite having a shit day, perhaps it was a blessing in disguise to break this pattern. I thought I'd get home and be worried about "missing" it but honestly I felt relief in the car. I no longer have to rush home to cook dinner so I can spend 4 hours C&Sing and attempt to get sleep. I can go home, play with the dogs, enjoy cooking dinner, watch TV and enjoy a Friday night for the first time in longer than I can remember. I truly hope this is a turning point for me. I've ranted about this struggle before on this sub and I feel alone knowing that no one else can really understand what it feels like to finally have a breakthrough like this except for the people here so felt the need to share. I hope everyone is having a good weekend and this place seriously is a great support (despite the constant controversy about the utility of this subredddit). It sounds silly but honestly I've looked forward to making this post.
Day 4 of urine fasting
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Oct 21 17:37:48 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58qe0s/day_4_of_urine_fasting/
---
http://i.imgur.com/DAjej53
Well the rest of my life might be shit, but my scale and measuring tape are telling me good things
/u/onlyroom_forthin [5'6 | CW:149.6 | 24.24 | SW:165 | UGW:120 | F]
Created: Fri Oct 21 17:02:37 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58q83w/well_the_rest_of_my_life_might_be_shit_but_my/
---
I posted in the middle of the night about my boyfriend problems. We are not talking. I'm really mad at him. He resents me for a variety of things. It's just generally really great and I feel like we are probably going to break up.
On the OTHER hand, I've been consistently weighing in at 149.5-150 for a couple days, so I feel like I officially made that goal :D I was frustrated about not being significantly below 150, but I realized I hadn't done any measurements this month so I just did. I dropped TWO inches on my waist, and about one each on my hips and bust (in 4-6ish weeks, can't remember exactly when I measured last). So that made me feel good, and now I don't feel so guilty about my plans for tonight. Pizza is a huge binge food for me, but I'm having long distance movie night with a friend from back home and I want to actually enjoy it, so I might order a small thin crust pizza and get drunk and not feel too bad about it. Probably going to try to fast tomorrow or Sunday too.
[Help] Kik group?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Oct 21 16:38:18 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58q3tp/kik_group/
---
[removed]
[Discussion] Substitutes for oil?
/u/procoyo [5'6" | 190lb | GW:140lb | -5lb | F]
Created: Fri Oct 21 16:21:06 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58q0r2/substitutes_for_oil/
---
I just made some delicious zucchini chips. I baked them in the oven, and they came out amazing. But I can't eat them all, because I had to use olive oil to allow them to fry up right. My calorie count would be so much lower if I didn't use that oil...
Do y'all have any advice for substituting oil in baking chips/crisps?
[Goal] My new plan
/u/zomboooo [5'7|115|18.1|-2|NB]
Created: Fri Oct 21 16:21:05 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58q0qw/my_new_plan/
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So I usually do 600 calories a day but I think Friday-Sunday I'm gonna go up to 800 calories. And also once every other week I go out with my dad to dinner and dessert. I really hope that with this plan I can continue loosing weight but also not feel the urge to binge as often
Thoughts or support are welcome!!
[Rant/Rave] [Rant] Mom is intentionally sabotaging me
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Oct 21 15:41:39 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58ptjw/rant_mom_is_intentionally_sabotaging_me/
---
[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] I wish he'd understand that I'm also trying to be prettier for him
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Oct 21 15:04:47 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58pmo4/i_wish_hed_understand_that_im_also_trying_to_be/
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[deleted]
[Discussion] I miss being the hot one (Dirty little secrets)
/u/miss_morticia [5'10" | cw: 146 | gw: 105 | 20.90 | F]
Created: Fri Oct 21 13:33:42 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58p513/i_miss_being_the_hot_one_dirty_little_secrets/
---
Ugh, so I am going to show a nasty piece of myself, but I have to get this out. Share your petty, vain thoughts and give me hope that I'm not the only person this horrible.
My husband started getting seriously into strength training and running about 6 months ago and all of a sudden he went from being adorable to HOT. I love it but it freaks me out too. This sounds so shitty to say but when we got married all his friends would tease that I was out of his league aesthetically and that petty, vain part of me loved it. I was the hot wife and it was great, my ego needed that.
Now he is objectively hotter than me and I'm freaking out. I'm continuing to encourage him because I see how much his self-confidence has improved and I want him to be proud of himself more than I want to feel like the pretty one. But I feel like an unattractive wench. So I'm working on the weight, but all I can see is the flaws I can't fix right now like my thin lips and huge nose.
We were at Target the other day and these two teen girls were giggling and blushing, kept looking over at him. He's clueless but it scared me. He's aging better than me and I have to step up my game.
[Other] Self thinspo?
/u/procoyo [5'6" | 190lb | GW:140lb | -5lb | F]
Created: Fri Oct 21 13:31:50 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58p4nw/self_thinspo/
---
This might be weird, but I find a lot of comfort in what I looked like many years ago. In 2011, I was at 140lbs, my lowest weight. I went looking for old photos of myself in my gmail and was amazed at what I used to look like. I definitely didn't appreciate it at the time. And this morning, I stumbled across a photo of me from 2014. I don't know how much I weighed, probably 150lbs, and it was like staring into a dream. I still own the clothes I was wearing in the photos, although I definitely couldn't wear them now. It just makes me so hopeful. Even moreso, I know I can do better this time.
[Rant/Rave] Frustrated
/u/thecalcographer [5'4 | CW: 105 | GW: 99 | 18.0 | F]
Created: Fri Oct 21 12:55:23 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58oxil/frustrated/
---
I've been eating between 500 and 700 calories per day, but my scale weight isn't going down and for some reason is higher than it was last week. I have no idea what I'm doing wrong or why I'm not losing. Does anyone have any ideas on how to start losing again?
[Rant/Rave] If I'm not back to 115 by Monday morning, I'm fasting until I am
/u/c_marier [5'6"| 113.4| 18.3 | -13 | 22F]
Created: Fri Oct 21 12:49:29 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58oweh/if_im_not_back_to_115_by_monday_morning_im/
---
So I've been floating just under 115 for the last month or two and just can't budge. My period was seven days late and I thought that finally I had lost it and was super excited but NO it came crashing back through and ruined everything and then I ate at my parents' last night and had too much soup and my little brother teasingly called me a cow and I felt so fat in all of the mirrors and then I weighed myself this morning and I'm 118.0 FREAKING POUNDS and I know I'm on my period and bloated from liquids last night but SERIOUSLY 115.0 is the highest weight I'm slightly okay with and any higher IS NOT ACCEPTABLE.
So far today I've had a small bowl of noodles for lunch. I have an event with my bf right after work, so will have no chance to grab food and can lie about having eaten and hopefully won't get snacks (I can plead having an upset stomach from my period). Hopefully will fast until Saturday evening when I have a celebration for a friend (allow myself 1 drink and 1 ceremonial bite of cake) and then Sunday I will watch the football game at my parents' but I should be able to avoid food and just drink coffee.
I hatehatehate this. I just want to be normal, but when I try not to freak out about food and weight and the way my thighs look, I just postpone the freakout for later when I step on the scale and regret my entire life. Why do I have to be like this? I want to recover but I couldn't live with myself being any fatter than I am right now. I just want not to hate myself and my body and everything I eat :( But of course that's too much to ask. Whyyyyy
[Tip] PSA: Target has a printable $2 off Bronkaid coupon.
/u/KillingKylie [5'5| Meh|-38|F|GW: 97]
Created: Fri Oct 21 12:20:42 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58oqqv/psa_target_has_a_printable_2_off_bronkaid_coupon/
---
That is all. 😄
[Discussion] How do you come back from a binge?
/u/runningboyruns [5'9 | 130lbs | BMI: 19.2 | WEIGHT LOST: unmeasured | FtM (pre T)]
Created: Fri Oct 21 12:00:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58omtn/how_do_you_come_back_from_a_binge/
---
The day or hours after bingeing are typically torturous. I always beat myself up, push my body to the max with an intense workout, sometimes i try to purge it (which never really works for me). I've never found a way to be stable and feel okay after bingeing; who knows if that's even possible for me...
I wanted to know what some of your guy's methods are for bouncing back from a binge. What do you do to get yourself back on track?
What i currently do is fast for the rest of the day, do as many push ups/squats/sit ups as i can manage, and then go for an intense bike ride. But even after all that i never go to bed at night satisfied with the day's progress :(
[Discussion] Bored organs? Borgans?
/u/LittlestBear [5'7 | CW: 145bs | GW: 100lbs |F]
Created: Fri Oct 21 11:39:28 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58oims/bored_organs_borgans/
---
Full disclosure, I smoked a bit today...
Since Tuesday (following my horrible bender stupid weekend), I've had about 60 calories per day, 30 of those from the Flintstones vitamins I eat. I'm just sitting here wondering like, what are my intestines even DOING right now? Just chilling and absorbing water and coffee? My blood is always pumping so my heart is always working, I'm always breathing so my lungs are working, etc, but wtf does my digestive system do if there is nothing to digest? I feel like I'm going into ketosis or something because my head hurts and I feel like general garbage and my mouth tastes funny, but I am just imagining my guts just like, twiddling their thumbs waiting for something to happen lol
[Goal] Scale victory and TMI
/u/Wildrumpus273172
Created: Fri Oct 21 11:35:45 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58ohxa/scale_victory_and_tmi/
---
I've lost more than a pound since yesterday morning!
But I know it's not entirely fat...
Does anyone else get excited after a big BM cause you know you'll be lighter in the morning? 😂
(On mobile, no flair)
[Tip] Little MFP tip
/u/ahh_idk [5'4'' | will update | F]
Created: Fri Oct 21 11:19:41 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58oere/little_mfp_tip/
---
Sorry if this is already known information but I just thought I'd share anyway:
If you prefer to see how many calories you've actually consumed in the day rather than seeing what you have left, you can go onto myfitnesspal.com, go to goals, and set your calories to zero. It will not allow you to do this on your mobile app, it only works if you change it on a desktop on the actual website.
Maybe I'm just weird but I love how your consumed cals are in red so its almost like consuming more calories is a punishment.... lol. But it's especially helpful if you're restricting to lower numbers than MFP allows you to set your calorie goal to :)
http://imgur.com/a/2GxvS
[Rant/Rave] I can't stop eating
/u/ne_ne_ne
Created: Fri Oct 21 11:17:13 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58oeae/i_cant_stop_eating/
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This is basically just a rant from a lurker who has had disordered eating for way too long if not full blown binge eating disorder.
I'm 5 pounds higher than the weight I got to last year that made me cry for 3 days straight, and somehow managed to get me into a mindset where I ate 900 cals a day till I lost 20 pounds.
This past year has been awful. I've been diagnosed Bipolar II and now I'm starting to worry that every time I've lost weight in the past has been during a hypomanic episode. Now that I'm medicated, those episodes are gone, but not the exhaustion or binging.
I've talked about meds with my doctor, but this combo works for the main symptoms I'm feeling, so my current psychiatrist doesn't want to mess with them just to deal with eating issues, especially given I've had food problems since I was young. So I get to just keep getting fatter and fatter unless I can just reign in my bullshit and actually have self control.
I feel fat, and broken, and worthless, and stupid. Why can't I just be normal? I don't even want to be thin. I just don't want to have uncontrollable urges to eat 4000 calories every time I'm sad or angry.
It's really pathetic that not always being sad and not constantly shoving food in my face are things I need to aspire for. When I was younger I always hoped I'd be something great, not this.....
[Discussion] Count-Up App?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Oct 21 11:01:55 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58ob7m/countup_app/
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[deleted]
[Other] Reddit simultaneously testing and motivating me
/u/TummyRumblz [5'8" | CW:162.8| LW: 146 | GW: 120 | F]
Created: Fri Oct 21 10:56:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58oa26/reddit_simultaneously_testing_and_motivating_me/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/96511bb7cd454f89808f0b092d914665?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=6bfa2fc2ffec3360655e40b76970aa30
[Goal] After my 48 hour binge-athon I made a weigh in chart from now till New Years! 💕🐳 morning weight and evening weight. No more binges. I will look pretty!
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Oct 21 10:46:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58o86m/after_my_48_hour_bingeathon_i_made_a_weigh_in/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/732231d6730043228cbdd19c460f0650?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=95a90922de499ee5cfafeff12d6e5c24
[Rant/Rave] Look what I found at the coop!
/u/cestvraiduh
Created: Fri Oct 21 10:31:43 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58o5h0/look_what_i_found_at_the_coop/
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http://imgur.com/a/ykwqA
[Help] DAE run while restricting?
/u/I_Like_Stingrays [5'5" | CW:128.8 | GW:120 | -29 | F]
Created: Fri Oct 21 10:19:39 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58o38v/dae_run_while_restricting/
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This got pretty long, but if anyone else here is a runner do you have any tips for making it through your runs? I'm not talking feeling faint, but that sore muscle feeling.
I can usually run fine on Sundays-Tuesdays, but by Wednesday it's a struggle to even run a mile because my muscles just feel so weak. I'm trying to shave some time off my PR to prequalify for a race on Thanksgiving. The qualification is the Saturday before.
I typically restrict/fast during the week and try to eat normally over the weekend. I would rather just restrict but there's always social events and drinking going on plus my husband is there for every meal and it helps keep him from getting suspicious. I think that's why it's so much easier at the beginning of the week.
This past week I tried to increase my protein and calories to 800-1000 and it didn't seem to work. I ran ~5 miles on Monday and made my goal time, but could barely make it 2.5 miles last night. I went home and ate to 1250 calories for the day (ugh) and tried again this morning but had to stop and walk multiple times over my 3 mile run.
I don't feel like I have anywhere else to ask this where I can be honest about not wanting to increase my calories but still wanting to run...am I going to have to choose? I feel like my goal weight and goal time are conflicting with each other and I'm not going to succeed at either and this sucks :( I'm also regretting this because I'll have to eat leading up to Thanksgiving instead of fasting.
[Discussion] Daily Food Diary! October 21, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Fri Oct 21 10:03:07 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58nzw2/daily_food_diary_october_21_2016/
---
This is a daily food diary thread for October 21, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
[Discussion] Low weight: How to stay warm?
/u/1s0b3ll [175 cm | 57 kg | 18.6 | F]
Created: Fri Oct 21 09:55:53 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58nyei/low_weight_how_to_stay_warm/
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The search returned some threads, like [staying warm outside](https://www.reddit.com/r/proED/comments/542lnq/lets_talk_fall/) or [staying warm in school](https://www.reddit.com/r/proED/comments/49u8ap/how_do_you_stay_warm_in_school/), but none too helpful. If there's any substantial thread I've missed, please let me know. However:
It's barely fall. I'm at home, wearing two pairs of socks, three layers on the upper body and I'm wrapped in a fleece blanket. And yet, I'm freezing. Often the cold creeps into every fiber of my body and I'm chilled to the marrow, shivering, shivering, shivering, and only hot showers and layers of blankets help with that. No matter how many cloths I'm wearing, I'm always cold. My toes hurt from the cold. Nothing seems to help for long. All heat dissipates in no time. Fingers wrapped around a hot cup of tea just make the shivering worse, given the greater temperature difference. I'm at a loss.
How do you deal with the cold? How do you stay warm in your everyday life? How do you stay warm at home? How do you deal with the lack of insulating body mass and body heat?
[Help] First Fast, hour 53
/u/thinandblonde [5"5.5 | 110 | 18.1 | GW:108 | F]
Created: Fri Oct 21 09:49:38 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58nx8e/first_fast_hour_53/
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Hi guys,
I've posted before about how I never fast, because it makes me all kinds of woozy. There is always a first, and in my case, accidental fast.
On Tuesday, I got a flu shot - no biggie, I get one every year. After the shot, the nurse said "Oh, loads of people have a bad reaction to this". WTF?? I was two airplane rides away from home.
Wednesday morning, I thought something was wrong with my scrambled eggs - maybe I just wasn't hungry? By lunchtime, I was starting to feel really, really cold. Then nauseous. Left for the airport at 2pm. Then BAM! Sick as a dog on the flight, major chills, every bone hurt, and I felt like a hurl was imminent (and I was sitting next to my boss, who - bless him - got loads of blankets and wrapped me up.
I got to the hub and had to get a few terminals away for my next flight. I could barely walk, and had to drag luggage. Finally dragged myself home, at which point I though I would die. Flopped onto the bed and slept for 12 hours.
Yesterday I was so sick I only managed to crawl to the couch, where I sipped at ginger ale and tea and slept most of the day and all night.
Today I'm much better - and lighter! and am re hydrating with vitamin water zero. I had a 10 calorie jello cup.
Since I never fast, I'm not sure what to do? How do I re-introduce food? Do I wait until I'm hungry?
Also, part of me just wants to keep going, I'm not light headed (although having a mello day at home). Advice, please?
[Rant/Rave] [rant] Restricting and cigarettes
/u/Water-coffee-tea [5'9.75" | CW:115.6 lbs. | BMI:16.32 | F]
Created: Fri Oct 21 09:32:01 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58ntsj/rant_restricting_and_cigarettes/
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Why? Why does restricting trigger my cravings for cigarettes?!? It's so frustrating!
I'm coming up on two and a half years since I quit (with only a couple late night drunken lapses) and I wish I could be past these horrible cravings.
I hate smoking. I hate what it does to my skin, my teeth, my health in general. I've been doing so well without smoking for so long, but now I find that restricting my calories makes me want to smoke again. Maybe because I smoked so heavily for so long I'll always have this weakness.
Sorry, just had to rant. I'm throwing out the last two cigs in the house today that my husband kept for emergencies. (He quit around the same time as me, but he was never as serious a smoker as I was.)
I won't even tell you how old they were. Yuck.
I'm just trying to stay healthy, you know?
[Meme/Humor] here's a picture that helps me avoid binges. especially on oreos.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Oct 21 09:25:26 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58nshx/heres_a_picture_that_helps_me_avoid_binges/
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http://imgur.com/BjP686h
[Rant/Rave] It's 10am and I've already eaten half my calories of the day.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Oct 21 09:13:31 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58nq6v/its_10am_and_ive_already_eaten_half_my_calories/
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[deleted]
Fasting accountability post
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Oct 21 08:09:12 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58ne92/fasting_accountability_post/
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[removed]
[Rant/Rave] BEST FUCKING COMPLIMENT TODAY!!
/u/Melusedek [173 | CW: 57.5 | GW ?? | 19.21/18.99 | F]
Created: Fri Oct 21 07:26:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58n6yn/best_fucking_compliment_today/
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Today I'm fasting to make up for yesterday. I'm on campus in the student room I hang out in, trying to get work done but really we're just goofing off. So we're taking a smoke break outside, and since it's raining (as always) we were standing underneath the shelter where you put your bikes, which is just above head height (for me).
So we started talking about how tall we all were and I said I was 173 cm. The guy I have a crush on asked if I could be a model then. I said I was just barely too short, not to mention no where near skinny enough.
"What ever, you're skinny as hell."
Cue me trying to hold in the biggest fucking smile of my life. I brushed it off, saying that models are even skinnier and he made the point that they're sick. I said I would rather be not a model and not sick than a model and have to be like that.
lol if only he knew. Being a model would be great because then I could get money for this stupid illness in addition to the shame and frustration.
But that comment is going to carry me for the rest of the day.
[Discussion] Weekly Selfie, Progress Pic and OOTD Thread! October 21, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Fri Oct 21 06:03:23 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58mtym/weekly_selfie_progress_pic_and_ootd_thread/
---
This is the weekly picture thread for October 21, 2016.
Feel free to share your selfies, progress pics or outfit-of-the-day (OOTD) pics in this thread!
**Rules**
1. Be nice, **or you will be banned.**
2. Please use [imgur](http://imgur.com/) as a host.
Consider adding commentary on featured brands, sizing, inspiration behind your OOTD (trying to look thin or cover up weightloss, etc.)!
**Remember that anyone can view the contents of this thread even if they are banned from this subreddit. If you receive unwanted messages, please contact the mods with a screenshot of the relevant messages. Note that even if we ban people, they can still message you, and they still have access to the contents of this subreddit. The best thing for you to do is to block them.**
*****
Selfie, progress pic and OOTD threads are posted every Friday.
Have any questions or concerns? Comment below, or [PM the mods.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FproED)
[Rant/Rave] Oh god, fuck oreos
/u/theraindropsx46 [165 cm | 60kg | GW: 45kg | M]
Created: Fri Oct 21 06:02:17 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58mtsp/oh_god_fuck_oreos/
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I consumed 8500 kj of oreos, which led to me eating a whole bunch of other stuff to counteract the sweetness, just fuck me up the arse I want to die
[Rant/Rave] I feel like I'm going to have a panic attack
/u/little-paws
Created: Fri Oct 21 04:36:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58mjm1/i_feel_like_im_going_to_have_a_panic_attack/
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I ate too much yesterday, drank too much wine. Overall still under my TDEE but that doesn't make me feel better.
I'm meeting friends today and I just feel anxious about having to make excuses for eating and I look so fat in everything I wanted to wear and ugh.
[Help] Go away, skin
/u/morose_adipose [5'2 | 90 lbs | 17.05 | F]
Created: Fri Oct 21 04:30:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58mivo/go_away_skin/
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I've lost about 100 lbs, and I lost it relatively quick. As a result, I have god awful loose skin that is driving me nuts. Mainly on my stomach, the other areas seem to be tightening up. Part of the stomach issue may also be that I've had a major surgery (a huge uterine tumor/hysterectomy) and from what I've read, once those muscles have been cut, it's hard to get them back to normal...if possible at all. So not only do I have the loose skin issue, but no matter how many crunches and stuff I do, I still have a stomach bulge made of flimsy muscle and loose skin.
I've been taking collagen supplements, using bio oil and Skintight firming lotion on the area, exfoliating the area, and trying to stay plenty hydrated in an effort to firm things up, but it's still my biggest problem area and it's making me sad. I've lost so much weight and still can't wear a bathing suit or cute tops. :(
Does anyone have any tips as to how I can firm things up more? Surgery to have the skin removed isn't really an option at the moment.
Also, I'm old lol. So I mean, things don't bounce back the way they did when I was in my 20's. Sob.
[Help] Fasting help request
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Oct 21 03:21:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58mbta/fasting_help_request/
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[removed]
[Tip] Need to lose 20 lbs (hopefully more) in 4-6 weeks. Any tips?
/u/Illinoishay
Created: Fri Oct 21 03:10:10 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58marm/need_to_lose_20_lbs_hopefully_more_in_46_weeks/
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[removed]
[Rant/Rave] Ate almost 3000 calories yesterday
/u/Melusedek [173 | CW: 57.5 | GW ?? | 19.21/18.99 | F]
Created: Fri Oct 21 02:51:06 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58m8vo/ate_almost_3000_calories_yesterday/
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Guess who's living off coffee and cigarettes today. 💩
[Other] ED Twitter usernames
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Oct 21 02:36:26 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58m7hz/ed_twitter_usernames/
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[deleted]
[Thinspo] Today's body check (5'2" ???lbs.)
/u/SebastianofSiena [160cm | 106lbs | 19.30 | 0lbs | FtM]
Created: Fri Oct 21 02:27:18 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58m6of/todays_body_check_52_lbs/
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http://i.imgur.com/rpmzDlo.jpg
[Discussion] Who else here uses Peach (the app)?
/u/yellowlettuce [5'9" | CW:152 GW:125 | -83lbs ]
Created: Fri Oct 21 02:06:07 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58m4op/who_else_here_uses_peach_the_app/
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I saw someone else's post about the app so i downloaded it and made an account!
Add me! my user on it is psychiatry :)
[Help] Broth goes right through me :(
/u/Bubbline
Created: Fri Oct 21 02:02:48 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58m4cd/broth_goes_right_through_me/
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Hi, it's me with the mysterious gastrointestinal illness again. Basically I haven't been able to keep any food down the past couple days. I swallow something and it comes right back up, so i've been avoiding food.
Today I woke up and I felt like I got hit by a truck. I'm massively dehydrated and malnourished, no wonder, so today around 4 while everyone else had tacos (😩) I made some broth. Well now i'm running to the bathroom every 20 minutes and it seems like it's coming out the same way it went it and it suuucks.
the thing is- i knew this would happen, i just forgot! i used to drink broth a lot when i was restricting heavily and it always went right through me.
so i guess i'm just wondering does this happen to anyone else? does anyone know how i can avoid this? broth is the only thing i can keep down right now so i'd really like to keep drinking it but i can't if i'm going to be like this /:
[Discussion] Has anyone here ever tried Wink Ice cream? The 100-calorie per pint vegan ice cream?
/u/yellowlettuce [5'9" | CW:152 GW:125 | -83lbs ]
Created: Fri Oct 21 01:53:00 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58m3ed/has_anyone_here_ever_tried_wink_ice_cream_the/
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Suuuuuuuper tempted to order some online. They package it in dry ice so it's "guaranteed frozen at the time of delivery."
Minimum order is 4 pints, but 6 pints is free shipping so i would probably do that.
But also, do I really want to do that to myself? Having that ice-cream just sitting there? But the upside is that it's so low-cal. I highly doubt I would be able to even finish a pint, because I don't even particularly enjoy sweets. So if I only finish half of a pint, that's 50cal. 10 potato chips is like 100-150 cal. So i'd much rather have that low cal ice cream available in case of a binge rather than a big bag of potato chips.
[Discussion] I don't know if anyone else can relate to this while dating but
/u/explodingrhinoceros [5'7" | CW: 166.0 | BMI: 25.9 | SW: 220.0 lbs | GW: 125.0 lbs | F]
Created: Fri Oct 21 01:45:43 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58m2p4/i_dont_know_if_anyone_else_can_relate_to_this/
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For me, eating in front of someone I'm interested in is way more intimate than sex. I'm always relieved when they want to go out for drinks and not dinner, despite the possible implications.
The guy I was talking about in one of my last posts said something so unforgivable to me, especially to an eating disordered person, and I told him I didn't want to see him again. He had the nerve to say he knew I was going to break his heart. That upset me, yet in the back of my mind I was screaming "BUT I FUCKING ATE IN FRONT OF YOU!"
It didn't even matter that we were only seeing each other briefly and had slept together. Most folks would be thinking in my case "but we had sex!" Not me, I get angry when dates do something shitty and I've eaten in front of them.
[Thinspo] Eugenia though..❤
/u/High_as_red [5'4 | F]
Created: Fri Oct 21 01:35:02 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58m1ns/eugenia_though/
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https://imgur.com/gallery/9MlrV
[Discussion] is anyone else fat but still has (have??) visible collarbones?
/u/get-it_together [5'3 |160??| UGW 125 | F]
Created: Fri Oct 21 01:34:36 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58m1m5/is_anyone_else_fat_but_still_has_have_visible/
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I'm short and fat (yay me) aaaand I have broad shoulders for a girl. But the way my fat is distributed it's mostly in my ass and thighs, so my collarbone is really visible but I'm really overweight and it's throwing me for a loop. Is anyone else like this?
[Help] Boyfriend just moved his things into the guest room, so fuck me I guess
/u/onlyroom_forthin [5'6 | CW:149.6 | 24.24 | SW:165 | UGW:120 | F]
Created: Fri Oct 21 00:21:59 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58ltuq/boyfriend_just_moved_his_things_into_the_guest/
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Edit: this isn't really about ED so I'm sorry if it's against the rules. I just didn't know where else to go.
I don't want to include too many details, he could already probably figure out who I am from my posts. We got in a fight tonight that mostly stemmed from him being drunk, we got home and I tried to just ignore him because fighting with him after he's been drinking never goes well. When I got up to go to bed he had moved all his things into the spare room/office and all my things out of the office into the bedroom. I wasn't hungry but it made me want to emotional eat so I ate a bagel which I hate myself for. I feel like we are over now. I'm not dumb, we'd been having issues ever since we moved in together, but I still really love him and I didn't want to break up.
My biggest trigger for serious restriction/fasting has been breakups so...I'm probably done eating for a while. My only plan for intake tomorrow is vodka. Fuck it. I give up.
[Intro] [Intro] Hey. I'm new to this site, just wanted to say hello & find some people that are like me & connect & feel better
/u/notworthausername [5'7" | 129 | 20.1 | -10 | 26F]
Created: Thu Oct 20 23:24:12 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58ln0k/intro_hey_im_new_to_this_site_just_wanted_to_say/
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I'm almost 27, in December.
I first started worrying about weight when I was 9 because I turned to food as emotional support during my parents divorce. I'd put strapless bras around my chub and wear normal clothes over it so my fat wouldn't hang out. I was 9 and weighed 109lbs.
When I was 15 stress happened and I didn't really think about it, but I stopped eating for a couple days, eat, weigh myself, repeat. I didn't know it was happening. I hit 110lbs at my height now, a BMI of 17.17. My parents intervened, I got attention and love. Then I started drinking and smoking weed- my weight creeped up on 130.
19 years old, hit 136. I was devastated but drinking and drugs were my way out now.
20 years old I hit 140 and something had to stop. I consciously wouldn't eat. I started making myself purge. I got down to 123 and kept it there until I was 22, very unhealthily, kept purging. Then at almost 24 I started drinking more and eating more, and somehow reached 155.
I quit drinking (went to treatment), easily got back down to 140 with no ED in sight.
Now, my long-term boyfriend and I broke up, I don't have drugs or alcohol to turn to, and I've lost eight pounds this month so far. I don't know what's wrong with me.
I'm just looking for people who have been through this kind of thing because I can't tell anyone about it, simply because I don't think I can let go of it. It distracts me, and when I'm feeling really low I think I deserve to disappear. I know it's not right. I can't eat food without either feeling guilty, and lately it's been because I emotionally can't. There are too many good feelings associated with eating, or blocking shit out, and I don't want to block shit out by eating food. I just want my problems to go away. I don't know why I answer to life's problems like this. I just want to have the courage to be myself, and I can't. I feel weak and tired and frail. I want my body to feel the same. I get mad because I'm not mature enough to handle fucking adulting. Just looking to talk to someone so I don't feel so alone.
[Rant/Rave] My scale says I gained 15 lb
/u/Navelpudding [5' 6" | 180 | -70 | F]
Created: Thu Oct 20 22:47:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58li8q/my_scale_says_i_gained_15_lb/
---
I know it can't be real weight so why am I still freaking out. Ugh I hate my scale so much.
[Other] I found a "How to Gain Weight" guide on Wikihow. Funny how I am doing exactly the opposite of all of the things listed.
/u/throwaway0908123 [5'7 | 120 | 18.73 | -17 | F]
Created: Thu Oct 20 21:25:00 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58l6nv/i_found_a_how_to_gain_weight_guide_on_wikihow/
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http://www.wikihow.com/Gain-Weight-if-You-Are-Underweight
[Help] I'm new and I have a question.
/u/TummyRumblz [5'8" | CW:162.8| LW: 146 | GW: 120 | F]
Created: Thu Oct 20 21:11:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58l4n9/im_new_and_i_have_a_question/
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I've been lurking here for a while and decided to make and account. This might be a dumb question, but are there any other black people here?
[Discussion] Dae obsessively worry about their health but at the same time want to die?
/u/Itsemurha [177cm|CW 67kg| GW: 55kg | SW:120kg |20.9| F]
Created: Thu Oct 20 20:51:39 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58l1ly/dae_obsessively_worry_about_their_health_but_at/
---
Fuck, idk what is wrong with me anymore.
[Discussion] Back In the Swing of Things
/u/antkings [GW 105 | BMI 20.77 | -79lbs | Male 20]
Created: Thu Oct 20 20:45:33 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58l0np/back_in_the_swing_of_things/
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I'm almost feeling euphoric about my relapse. Throughout my childhood/teenage years, I had a really unhealthy relationship with food. I would binge, purge, starve-- only to realize that my bipolar disorder medication made it impossible to lose weight. After I got off of lithium and the other drugs, it became so easy to become anorexic. In 6 months I went from 200 (my highest) to 119 (my lowest). I started having the beginning of really bad health problems, and I couldn't keep up with taking care of my daily duties anymore. I would be so lightheaded or I would pass out from lack of nutrients. I started raw veganism after that, and as my ana faded and I worked hard I slowly merged into vegetarianism. I was working out and feeling better than ever. But school started and I got a full time position at my job-- so gone was the gym from me, I started to gain weight, and now my s/o had thrown out our scale, she wouldn't let me restrict or calorie count. I started to feel scared and anxious about my weight gain. By the time I stepped back on the scale, I was 135. I immediately upped my exercise, downloaded calorie counting apps, and began a "healthy" diet (just below my exercise calculated net calorie intake). I just cannot stand to look at myself in the mirror anymore though-- I have awful thoughts about myself, all I see is rolls and fat, all I can think is how I looked at 200.
So I'm back. I feel so much better now that I'm eating no more than 850 cals a day and burning at least 1800. I feel so much lighter.
[Rant/Rave] DAE have the same conflict as me or am I alone?
/u/Skinnystems
Created: Thu Oct 20 20:37:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58kzhu/dae_have_the_same_conflict_as_me_or_am_i_alone/
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I'd hate to drag this out to some long explanation, so I'm going to try and make it short.
I am at a huge conflict with myself on a day to day basis. I have this deep, engraved and determined love for thin, delicate, tiny, small- framed bodies and I WANT and WISH and desire for that...
I struggle with the fact that I know that to achieve that body I want, I must restrict and starve and not binge, and I hate the body I am in and am so negative about how I feel about myself and insecure and sad...
And then they're is this other part of me that wants to love myself, TRUELY love my body and feed it what it wants and NEEDS and work out and be fit and strong and lean.
And I struggle with these two halves. I want to be tiny and delicate and bony and small, but healthy and fit and lean... and I know that's not possible. I can't be both. I want to cry.
[Rant/Rave] Asked if I could sit on my boyfriends lap and he said I would crush him..
/u/frailraven [5'10 | CW 117 | LW 115 | F20]
Created: Thu Oct 20 20:32:06 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58kyk5/asked_if_i_could_sit_on_my_boyfriends_lap_and_he/
---
So we were both playing video games and I asked if I could sit on his lap while he plays which we have done before. But this time he said I would crush him. I know I'm probably over reacting, but that was a huge trigger for me and I probably won't be eating much tomorrow...
[Rant/Rave] Plateau week. Ugh!
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Oct 20 19:18:44 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58kmq6/plateau_week_ugh/
---
[deleted]
[Thinspo] collarbones, chokers and slim necks are my favorite thing to paint👄💕🌸
/u/rukittenmerightnow
Created: Thu Oct 20 19:13:47 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58kly5/collarbones_chokers_and_slim_necks_are_my/
---
https://i.reddituploads.com/20f807b5c75b47e18f752e80588d8281?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=e2822173271040e16f2cc39550b3cfcb
[Discussion] for those fighting for recovery, in a dark place, or at their lowest... some words i found strength in
/u/cactuskey [5'0 | CW: 105lb | GW: 75lb | 26F]
Created: Thu Oct 20 18:51:53 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58kic9/for_those_fighting_for_recovery_in_a_dark_place/
---
http://dearcoquette.com/on-a-beautiful-mess/
[Discussion] Thinspo?
/u/oksneaky [63in | CW: 126.8 | GW: 115 | F]
Created: Thu Oct 20 18:02:20 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58ka0r/thinspo/
---
I feel guilty since she's trying to lose weight, but I started watching "My Big Fat Fabulous Life" and I'm so disgusted. She's not only grossly overweight, she's really dirty. She has trash all over her room at her PARENTS HOUSE, and her car is filled, too. She's so cocky about the fetish for fat women, too, and is blaming all her problems on PCOS. I know PCOS is real and can cause weight gain, but not the only reason. She eats pizza in the first episode. She's proud and astonished at a 4.5 pound weight loss in a week. I can't stop watching someone say you've seen this?!
[Meme/Humor] When your looking at tasty food during a fast.
/u/CowOffTheFarm [65" | 145 | 24.41 | - | F | GW 120]
Created: Thu Oct 20 18:02:13 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58k9zv/when_your_looking_at_tasty_food_during_a_fast/
---
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HA1mbZ_MMh8
Goodbye guys <3
/u/peanutbutteredbanana
Created: Thu Oct 20 17:55:02 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58k8sz/goodbye_guys_3/
---
I just wanted to say bye to one of the best communities I've ever participated in. I wish you all luck with whatever your goals are. My ED has consumed every aspect of my life and i think its time for me to try and recover for real this time. I want to live a normal teenage life and not fret over my body, calories, and my weight. I want to be happy as well and it's not possible to be a happy anorexic. I'll probably be back soon as recovery never ends up well, but maybe this time will be different. Love you guys and I'll miss you all <3 thank you for being so supportive!
[Discussion] Homemade Broth?
/u/possiblycurious [5'5"| 142|GW 125| -8lbs| F]
Created: Thu Oct 20 17:45:20 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58k765/homemade_broth/
---
I can't stand the bland flavour of store broth or the crazy sodium, so
I boiled some chicken & herbs together. I gave the chicken to the spouse & nestled in for the night with the broth.
I imagine the calorie count can't be craazy, unless I was boiling super fatty chicken?
[Rant/Rave] [rant/intro]
/u/qwertylooping [5' 3" | LW 107 | CW: dory speaks my language]
Created: Thu Oct 20 17:22:47 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58k3b4/rantintro/
---
I’m currently at work because I just binged and purged for the umpteenth time here because it was a food day and I have absolutely zero self-control. I keep debating between being satisfied and happy with my body and wanting to starve myself back to inny skinny me. At the beginning of summer, I was the smallest I’d ever been in my life, including childhood – visible abs, toned arms, a 22.5 inch waist – I had it all – or so I keep thinking. In reality, I know I was still dissatisfied with my thighs and calves, and tempted to get to an even 100 lbs. I was blacking out from the electrolyte imbalances and foggy-headed most of the day, developing wrinkles from dehydration, had amenorrhea, and would isolate myself to binge and purge multiple times a day. All my hobbies and relationships were sacrificed to my obsession with food.
But I was happier with myself than I am now, empty-headedness, health issues and all. I decided to “recover” at the end of July, deluded, thinking I could go about it on my own without a therapist or support system. Now I’m back up to the clothes I fit in at 135-140 lbs and I’m too scared to weigh myself. But I know I’m still healthy, despite almost being overweight. I hit the gym 5-6 times a week, have a resting heart rate below 70, and can lift more than ever before.
I’m so, so conflicted. I want to be tiny again. I want to intuitively eat without obsessing about every single macro or calorie in a single bite of food. I want to be strong and fast. But then I want to fast and hit an underweight BMI. I want to be strong, independent, driven, and derive confidence from my personality, not my looks. But I want to be stared at in the street again and be catered to like I was 30 lbs ago.
I don’t really know where I’m going with this or what decision I’ll come to. If I’ll even come to one. I just needed to get something out. Even though I have so much more to say. I don’t know. I guess is anyone in the same boat?
[Other] Peach Username List
/u/citrus_cunt [5' 9"| 139lbs | 19.5| +2lbs | F]
Created: Thu Oct 20 17:16:14 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58k24s/peach_username_list/
---
Hey guys! I thought it would be a good idea if we shared our peach accounts! :)
I'm citrus_cunt
[Goal] My appetite is starting to go away again, and I'm a little grateful
/u/rukittenmerightnow
Created: Thu Oct 20 17:00:01 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58jz2i/my_appetite_is_starting_to_go_away_again_and_im_a/
---
Hi, I've been fasting for the past month, getting about 1,000 calories a day and recently I've been fasting all day until dinner, and trying to keep it under 500 a day. During the school day I get waves of hunger and then it subsides and sometimes by dinner time I'm not even hungry at all! I still eat because my family's around though :) also, I didn't purge today! For the first time in a few weeks, I'm so happy
Have an awesome day❤️
[Discussion] Does anyone else have an irl thinspo?
/u/OperatingOnScientist [5'3 | 128.6lbs | 23.41 | F | UGW 100lbs]
Created: Thu Oct 20 16:54:29 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58jy44/does_anyone_else_have_an_irl_thinspo/
---
There's a girl on my course who is absolutely 100% thinspo goals. She's in a lot of my classes and laboratories, and she is so skinny and dainty and beautiful. Seeing her five days a week is so motivating! Does anyone else have any day to day irl thinspo? And is it creepy for me to have thinspo of someone that I know?
[Rant/Rave] exhausted
/u/kinaadman [5'1" | SW 210 | CW 110 | GW: 90 | F]
Created: Thu Oct 20 16:46:16 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58jwm6/exhausted/
---
i binged/purged for hours last night and today for breakfast i ate about 890 calories of breakfast on like less than 2 hours of sleep. things are stressful at home; someone my family was dependent on is dead now and i am being made to step up and i can't take care of everyone, i can barely take care of myself
[Help] Preventing weakness before exercise?
/u/procoyo [5'6" | 190lb | GW:140lb | -5lb | F]
Created: Thu Oct 20 16:21:24 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58js1u/preventing_weakness_before_exercise/
---
I started taking exercise classes this week, the same week I fell back into my old ED habits. I'm doing so well, eating under 200 calories every day, drinking so much lovely tea, and I've lost 8lbs in 4 days (btw I'm literally obese). But I don't want to pass out on the dance floor. Any advice for keeping strength up for about an hour's worth of work?
[Tip] Motivation tip :)
/u/nightprowla
Created: Thu Oct 20 16:11:43 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58jq90/motivation_tip/
---
Cut a ribbon to the size you want your waist to be. I measured my ribbon to 22inch. Then wrap the ribbon around your wrist, when you want to eat or binge or go over your daily amount, un wrap the ribbon and admire it, count to 100 and by that time you'll have changed your mind on what you were going to do. Tried it today and saved me 230cals hehe
[Discussion] Making myself feel awful on purpose to avoid eating
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Oct 20 16:07:13 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58jpea/making_myself_feel_awful_on_purpose_to_avoid/
---
I have social anxiety really bad but I go out anyway because I know I'll eat less or nothing if I spot a girl thinner than me (which I always do). Plus I burn calories on the walk, as well.
Anyone else do similar stuff?
[Other] I woke up to a plane flying over my house, which isn't abnormal considering where I live.
/u/Comeheredia
Created: Thu Oct 20 15:44:55 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58jl6u/i_woke_up_to_a_plane_flying_over_my_house_which/
---
It took me a moment to realise it was my stomach growling fiercely. I love it!
[Discussion] Anyone else excited about The Neon Demon?
/u/FeedMeDreams [5'5" | 64.4kg | 23.7 | F]
Created: Thu Oct 20 15:40:59 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58jkgp/anyone_else_excited_about_the_neon_demon/
---
New movie, I keep seeing ads for it on Facebook but I don't think it's out yet, at least not here. I can't talk to anyone irl about it, but it looks like amazing thinspo. On the other hand, kinda depressing that I'll never be that young again. Probably never be that thin, either.
[Other] Decided to splurge and bought 10 pints of Halo Top.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Oct 20 15:06:53 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58jdya/decided_to_splurge_and_bought_10_pints_of_halo_top/
---
[deleted]
PRO ANA coach : Master
/u/ukjeff2014
Created: Thu Oct 20 14:59:00 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58jcab/pro_ana_coach_master/
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[removed]
[Goal] I think pant sizes lie, these are a size 2. But I sure love the way they fit and make me feel. That's all that matters, that you always feel great in your own skin.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Oct 20 14:04:19 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58j1bt/i_think_pant_sizes_lie_these_are_a_size_2_but_i/
---
https://m.imgur.com/a/zYKTb
[Discussion] Do you weigh yourself after binges?
/u/goddamnroommate [5'6" | 143.8 | 23.30 | -50ish | F]
Created: Thu Oct 20 13:52:32 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58iyvi/do_you_weigh_yourself_after_binges/
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I have a weird thing with the scale. It's extremely triggering, but in a really unpredictable way. I wont know if i'll binge or fast after, until i weigh myself. And since it exacerbates everything, i always give myself a day without weighing myself after a binge. What do you all do?
Guys- I'm at the end of a two day binge, I need to wake up tomorrow and not stuff my face AGAIN. Please motivate meeee!
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Oct 20 13:43:07 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58iwx4/guys_im_at_the_end_of_a_two_day_binge_i_need_to/
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[removed]
[Rant/Rave] I've full-on relapsed and I feel both great and horrible about it
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Oct 20 13:29:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58iu87/ive_fullon_relapsed_and_i_feel_both_great_and/
---
I've been on the verge of relapsing for a month or so and have mostly tried to fight it, but here I am. I've completely reverted to my old behaviors - I'm counting every calorie, only eating when people are watching, and obsessively checking "how long to lose x pounds on y calories per day" calculators (and creating secret Reddit accounts to hide from my partner - can't forget that). I feel guilty about failing at the recovery I worked so hard on for years, but at the same time I feel so in control of myself and can't wait to get rid of the weight I've put on over the past few years.
[Goal] Finally able to lose weight. (Mobile can't flair)
/u/DollfaceJasmine
Created: Thu Oct 20 13:07:51 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58ipus/finally_able_to_lose_weight_mobile_cant_flair/
---
For the past few months I couldn't lose weight due to birth control and finally I got it removed yesterday. Since yesterday I have gone from 162 to 157. I'm also proud because I only ate some toast and drank some coffee so far today. :)
[Rant/Rave] Sodium and bloating
/u/depressionbunny [5'6" | 138 | 22.6 | -12 | FM]
Created: Thu Oct 20 12:42:25 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58ikm1/sodium_and_bloating/
---
I knew what I was getting myself into by living off of broth and protein bars. Still, though I know it's temporary, now that I'm all puffy from the salt, I'm disappoint despite the scale dipping lower and lower.
I focus mainly on muscle definition. I want to look shredded. But all this water weight is in the way. I know I'm losing fat, just annoying in the mean time.
That's all.
[Rant/Rave] Period and restricting cramps ruining me :(
/u/imperfectcontrol [5'6" | CW: 115 | 18.56 | CGW: 100 | F]
Created: Thu Oct 20 12:33:03 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58iio4/period_and_restricting_cramps_ruining_me/
---
I just got my period and my cramps are always so bad. On top of that, I haven't eaten in 30 hours. My stomach hurts so much right now. I don't even know if I can tylenol.
Any idea on how I can ignore the pain and focus on getting work done? I'm really scared to eat because what if it becomes a binge, and afterwards, my stomach pain is still there?
:(
(mobile so can't flair sorry)
Period and restricting cramps are ruining me
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Oct 20 12:31:26 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58iiaw/period_and_restricting_cramps_are_ruining_me/
---
[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] everything going wrong
/u/eekcoffee [5'7'' | 128lbs | 19.98 | -28 | F]
Created: Thu Oct 20 12:30:49 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58ii5t/everything_going_wrong/
---
I don't really know where else to vent.. I usually just lurk on this subreddit (with a few posts here and there) but I feel like I have so much going on and I just need to let it out. Usually I'll talk about my problems to my boyfriend but he's been so busy recently that he just doesn't have much time for me..
I have a transgender brother (FTM) who's 14 years old and who I absolutely love to death. Unfortunately, he just started high school and the administration is a shitshow when it comes to his rights. At first he was able to use the boy's bathroom with no problem. He's very open about his gender and no male student has had a problem with it. But recently the school superintendent created a policy stating that he could not use those bathrooms and could not room with anyone not of his biological gender on his band trip (the policy came out the day before this trip. he has another one coming up where all 3 male potential roommates are aware he is transgender and are totally fine with rooming together. it also costs a lot more to have a single, which is what the school is trying to force him to do). when my mom mentioned that the bathroom thing is a clear violation of his rights due to both state and federal regulations on the matter, she was completely ignored. so she said she would only be communicating with lawyers present from then on, and they replied that they would meet with her with no lawyers present but instead with a special ed teacher. like wtf? that pisses me off so much that they'd imply my brother belongs in special ed because he's transgender. it makes me so mad and i really want to be there for my brother.
but at some level, i wish that my family didn't tell me things. they don't know the extent of my metal health problems and i don't want them too. they don't even know that i was diagnosed with and medicated for major depression and an anxiety disorder. but i feel like my emotions have been so out of wack that i'm starting to fall apart and i don't know what to do. it's like the only thing i have control over anymore is not eating. on top of the family stuff, i feel like i'm drowning at school. i am forcing myself to spend time at the library (which is more than i can say for past semesters) so i'm hanging on academically but i just feel so dead and miserable. i feel like i'm just not good at engineering and there's no way i'll be able to live up to expectations once i graduate in a year and i'll just fail at whatever job i have.
and of course, with all of this stress i've been fasting and binging and i just want to break into the 120s already. i know that being skinny won't fix all of my problems, but it will make it better. i just want that control.
sorry for the length and if this didn't make sense... i just needed to get it out
[Discussion] What is Peach and is it worth getting?
/u/citrus_cunt [5' 9"| 139lbs | 19.5| +2lbs | F]
Created: Thu Oct 20 11:53:33 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58iaa2/what_is_peach_and_is_it_worth_getting/
---
Specifically what's the proed community like there? Is it easy to use?
[Rant/Rave] Been a rough week (rant)
/u/citrus_cunt [5' 9"| 139lbs | 19.5| +2lbs | F]
Created: Thu Oct 20 11:41:21 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58i7qr/been_a_rough_week_rant/
---
Got back from a week long binge/booze fest and I've been trying so hard to fix it. Good news- I'm not over 140! Bad news- my inner food schedule is so wacked. Now I get so hungry in the morning I have to eat breakfast before I work out and eat a full lunch (ugh!!) And i hate eating first thing in the morning!! And lunch!
I made a great plan which involves me making one goal for each week: like a food to avoid, a habit, a time frame, exercise types, you name it! This week was to eat a salad or fruit for every meal... and then my father came to visit and we went for burgers.... And then the debate... and then weed... and then bingeing...
Thankfully I only ate 1500-2000 calories which is way lower than my usual +2500 binges.
And my period is coming up in the next week and I *always* binge eat carbs the week before. Ach!!!
Sorry, I just needed somewhere to bitch out loud for a bit.
In other news I'm going to quit smoking weed and drinking for a few weeks. I just can't handle the binge triggers, plus I can feel the ickyness building up in my organs. I feel slimy from toxins. Blech!!!
[Discussion] Relationships and EDs
/u/lightfeathers [5'4" | CW 112 | GW 95 | F]
Created: Thu Oct 20 10:43:41 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58hvi4/relationships_and_eds/
---
How do your SOs handle you having an eating disorder? Do they know? If they don't, how do you hide it from them? How do you wish they handled your ED?
It's a very interesting topic, in my opinion. My SO knows about my ED and he tries to be supportive of me because when he used to freak out about it and get mad at me for restricting and fasting, it just made me scared of opening up to him and it just pushed me away. Now, he just tries to make sure I'm not severely harming my body.
[Goal] body check because I'm feeling good today!
/u/hoofofpig
Created: Thu Oct 20 10:41:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58hv2l/body_check_because_im_feeling_good_today/
---
https://i.reddituploads.com/22e1f20aa4524b2f9d9eda20db4fab96?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=d48048710ba1dd87dd210c76f9105580
[Rant/Rave] First body check in years.. getting there again? (5'2" 106lbs.)
/u/SebastianofSiena [160cm | 106lbs | 19.30 | 0lbs | FtM]
Created: Thu Oct 20 10:19:17 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58hqo5/first_body_check_in_years_getting_there_again_52/
---
http://i.imgur.com/gGTfSAe.jpg
[Rant/Rave] Disappointment and binging
/u/EmpireStateBitch [5'4" | CW 120 | GW 115 | UGW 100 | F]
Created: Thu Oct 20 10:10:01 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58hou7/disappointment_and_binging/
---
I was 2 days away from my next fight and I just found out it was cancelled. I am binging like absolutely crazy. At least when I'm training I know binging isn't an option and I rarely do it, but guys I'm just crushed.
I know pizza doesn't fix disappointment, and it doesn't fix any of the holes in my heart, but cheese just tastes so fucking good.
[Discussion] Daily Food Diary! October 20, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Thu Oct 20 10:02:56 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58hnbd/daily_food_diary_october_20_2016/
---
This is a daily food diary thread for October 20, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
[Meme/Humor] Found this in my chemistry textbook, wouldn't it be nice if the answer was yes?
/u/newportshorty [5'9 | CW:180 | -40]
Created: Thu Oct 20 09:46:00 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58hjvr/found_this_in_my_chemistry_textbook_wouldnt_it_be/
---
http://imgur.com/bHhI4qM
[Rant/Rave] I photoshopped myself to my "ideal" and still hated my body
/u/overcastforever
Created: Thu Oct 20 09:38:05 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58hibi/i_photoshopped_myself_to_my_ideal_and_still_hated/
---
I used to do a lot of retouching on models bodies when I worked for a fashion company so I know my way around photoshop. Well I did it on myself for the first time and no matter what I did I still found something to hate. I wasn't expecting this. I thought it would AT LEAST give me some kind of motivation or goal to work towards. But no, even if with the magic of photoshop, I will never look like the thinspo I look at unless I literally place my head on their bodies. effff
Side note: I can't believe I used to photoshop models. They were legit perfect and we still photoshopped them.
[Discussion] DAE do weird stuff to burn extra calories during normal activities?
/u/hh_lb
Created: Thu Oct 20 09:13:26 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58hdcc/dae_do_weird_stuff_to_burn_extra_calories_during/
---
Like when I'm sitting at work, I do leg lifts under my desk, touching my knee to the top of my desk. 20 on each leg and I just keep going back and forth. Like a way of getting in little exercises while I can't work out and it helps me not think about food and think about my goal bod instead :-)
There's also construction in my building at work so we have to go downstairs to use the bathroom now. I drink sooooo much water so that I have an excuse to use the stairs.
Anyone else do stuff like this?? And if so, what do you do bc I need some new ones lol.
[Rant/Rave] Vyvanse
/u/rizzle_riz [5'4' | CW:141 | 24.89 | -18 | F]
Created: Thu Oct 20 08:58:04 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58ha4s/vyvanse/
---
I've been prescribed medications for ADD since I was like 8, but have been on and off them through my life. I took some today for the sake of getting a fuck ton of homework and studying done, after it being a year since the last time I took it, and man do I feel like an anxious mess right now. I know a lot of people rave about vyvanse or adderall but it makes my anxiety go through the roof and I don't know how to cope with it. It's one of the main reasons I despise having to take it even though it helps my concentration immensely and helps with my appetite. It also triggers my trichotillomania which i've been doing incredibly good about this past year.
[Discussion] After eating my 280 calorie breakfast, I almost grabbed a ~500 calorie cinnamon roll and ruined my day. Instead, I got a black coffee. What was your last success?
/u/TessTobias [5'5" | 120 | 19.7 | -22]
Created: Thu Oct 20 08:55:31 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58h9na/after_eating_my_280_calorie_breakfast_i_almost/
---
I am so flipping proud to have had the self-control to avoid a binge. I feel like I'm back on track and I want to hear your success stories!
[Rant/Rave] Shiritaki noodles have changed my life! ❤
/u/DenyMyHunger [5'7"| Fat! | UGW:112| F]
Created: Thu Oct 20 08:46:15 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58h7xq/shiritaki_noodles_have_changed_my_life/
---
I buy "Eat water" slim products and have been eating them every day and it's so freeing to basically have whatever I want because I ordered noodles, rice and pasta so the possibilities are endless!
I ordered them in bulk a while ago and have just placed a second order for another 16 packs! I'm so excited and have my full week planned out.
I don't know where I was going with this. Just kinda want to rave I guess!
[Help] getting close to goal weight - maintenance?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Oct 20 08:30:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58h4yq/getting_close_to_goal_weight_maintenance/
---
hey everyone! so; i'm five pounds away from my first goal weight (115 lbs). I plan on switching to maintenance pretty soon for the holidays because my family is really nosy and I know they'll think something is up if i start skipping on the christmas cookies and thanksgiving treats. the thing is maintenance scares the shit out of me. all i ever hear is how everyone gains everything back and more after eating at a deficit and that just boggles my mind.. lately i've been losing weight and eating roughly 550 to 850 calories a day and i'm trying to figure out how to shift to maintaining 115 lbs once I get there without gaining everything back?
I've looked at several different calculators to figure out my maintenance and everywhere I look puts me roughly between 1350 calories to as much as 1650 calories a day (at sedentary)..
basically, my question is, for those of you who currently maintain at a low BMI/low weight; how'd you do it? how'd you transition? did you see any weight gain initially? did it go back down if you did gain?
thanks so much guys; you're all seriously a wonderful community - i look forward to hearing your opinions/advice!
[Rant/Rave] My emotions are so fucked today
/u/bookofbluesysaturday [5'7 | 141 | GW:115 | -31 | F]
Created: Thu Oct 20 08:27:36 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58h4e9/my_emotions_are_so_fucked_today/
---
I haven't done any homework all week and it's catching up to me. I didn't wake up in time to make it to class so I decided to stay home and try to get caught up but I'm just so unhappy I don't know if I can function.
I fasted over the weekend. Two full days of not eating, just straight water and a little pickle juice for electrolytes. After my fast was over, I didn't binge. I kept it under a thousand calories every day, I went running, I watched my sodium intake, drank tons of water.
This morning after using the restroom I weighed myself and I was up three pounds from my pre-fast weight. I just sat on the floor and cried for about ten minutes. There's no way I'll be able to make myself eat today even though I have to work later.
I understand logically that I have to be losing weight and that it's not all going to happen evenly and in a linear fashion but this feels like too much for me to bear. I need a break from my life to focus on not eating.
[Rant/Rave] Relapse
/u/bloodketosexmagic
Created: Thu Oct 20 08:25:20 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58h3yp/relapse/
---
87 days purge free until now. Done it twice already, it would've been 100 days on halloween.
Feeling pretty numb right now.
[Discussion] Sitting in class right now and we're watching a documentary about the origin of McDonalds.
/u/skinnieme [66" | 132lbs | 21.39| F]
Created: Thu Oct 20 08:19:55 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58h2y4/sitting_in_class_right_now_and_were_watching_a/
---
Lord help me.
[Intro] Hi, everyone!
/u/SebastianofSiena [160cm | 106lbs | 19.30 | 0lbs | FtM]
Created: Thu Oct 20 07:54:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58gy5l/hi_everyone/
---
Hello, all. I'm SebastianofSiena, Seb is fine. I used to come here way back, under the name 4st00lbs (after my then-GW). My current GW is more like 3st, ha. I'm a transsexual male, 7st 7lbs at last weigh-in. 5'2". Currently IP for schizophrenia. Last few days I've lived on cereal bars and cigarettes. Hoping to chop the cereal bars out and stick to the coffee & fags. Nurses get angry but they don't do a thing! So life is not all that bad. Hope someone remembers me (this was back when we had.. three subscribers?), and hope I still fit in! <3
[Help] Retracting a confession?
/u/heyhiohhello [5'6"/f/21 | UGW 51.8 [18.0]]
Created: Thu Oct 20 07:45:18 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58gwhz/retracting_a_confession/
---
I need lines to say to divert attention from my ED, because I'm dumb and sold myself out... Like, has anyone has ever felt the need to back track on a confession to someone that they made about ED? I need a little help in dealing with a fresh situation... I don't want the topic of my ED to exist between my SO and I, because it's an obvious conflict of interest...
The story:
Last night I TOTALLY BONED myself because my SO was like yo babe let's get pizza and I was all YEAH!! then I was all WAIT ... calorie land, sotheni wasall I'M VEGAN so then he was like do you want to just get like sauce and pepper mushrooms on bread? And I was like o b v i o u s l y n o t because if I'm eating pizza (which i dont find super good) I want an insane crazy pizza, not bread, that will be worth the one slice I eat (know what I mean..) but I didn't say that. I got awkward. Then he was asking me questions about pizza toppings (which bc of ED I like cant make a choice about because toppings are calories?? Stop asking about every single step plzzzz??) And I spazzed, said no to pizza. Time passed. Because he doesnt know the extent of my body issues, i wanted to diffuse the sitch.. I joked about getting two large pizzas for food to last a long time and he said
"Oh would you get that because you dont eat a lot?"
And I ASSUMED HE MEANT THAT WAS LIKE A TYPE OF RECOVERY LIKE NOW THAT THE SEMESTER STARTED AND IM DISCHARGED THAT I AM FATTENING MYSELF UP and I cried and got eMoTiOnAl irrational existential and suicidal, I started drinking and hyperventilating because SO just FOR THE FIRST TIME MENTIONED MY WEIGHT and yeah I made a big fuckin deal..... And it turns out he just meant that it would be a lot of food to store for a time, like as a joke because I could do it.
WHY DIDN'T I THINK OF THAT AND SAY heha yea that would be metabolically favourable for the semester, pizza is so good so, I love you goodnight <8^) he's in class rn, and I'm pretending to sleep - but I'm going to have to address this because we are in such a healthy (ignorant) relationship. What do I say????
??????
[Other] You can't vent to the person you're mad at - that's called arguing!
/u/CowOffTheFarm [65" | 145 | 24.41 | - | F | GW 120]
Created: Thu Oct 20 07:32:37 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58gucv/you_cant_vent_to_the_person_youre_mad_at_thats/
---
Just a line my mom dropped when offering her support for me, even if it's just a kind ear that'll listen. I just love you lovelies and needed to share that line with somebody!
Thanks to this wonderful community for being that listening ear for anybody who needs it <3
[Rant/Rave] Finally restricting again :)
/u/LeicesterSquare [1.83 m | 68 kg | M]
Created: Thu Oct 20 07:32:03 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58gu9e/finally_restricting_again/
---
So I stopped counting calories around June, when I decided to hit the gym to build some muscle.
I've been awful. Binging almost daily, I don't think there's been a day in which I have eaten less than my TDEE, and even though I have put on some lean mass, I'm as fat as I used to be before I started restricting. So, after last night's binge, I decided to take control again: I downloaded myFitnessPal, and I'll be logging everything I put in my mouth, making sure I won't go over 1700 daily calories ever. I'll also lift and do cardio at least 5 days every week.
So far I've had my very own oatmeal alternative (made with cauliflower, berries, peanut butter, cinnamon, soy bran, and soy milk) for breakfast, and it's been great. I weighed and logged every single ingredient scrupulously and will continue to do so, nothing will be ignored.
I'll also only eat real food, made by myself only: enough with processed stuff.
I want to keep doing this until my appetite reaches human levels again, and only then I'll be capable of recovering and stop tracking my intake.
[Other] on mobile can't flair, but body check 10/20
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Oct 20 07:27:42 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58gtki/on_mobile_cant_flair_but_body_check_1020/
---
https://i.reddituploads.com/facf2b17960e4beaadd2c1426ba0a24e?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=9d39962a91cdf2bd0f52a97bb3be1cc4
[Help] Meta Appetite Control
/u/Neshamizz
Created: Thu Oct 20 07:20:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58gsaj/meta_appetite_control/
---
Has anyone ever used this? I tend to stick to green tea pills but they make me twitchy beyond belief. I saw this on an ad and was curious if anyone had ever used that product?
[Tip] fasting tip!
/u/clamshells [5'7 | 115 | 18.0 | f]
Created: Thu Oct 20 07:08:18 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58gqb7/fasting_tip/
---
sometimes when i'm on a fast, i'll put on a really pretty, finicky lipstick. i'm talking the kind that looks good but is cheap enough to smudge the moment you put anything near your mouth. then try as long as you can to keep the lipstick intact! you're pretty much limited to anything you can drink through a straw :)
[Discussion] "Healthy" binges
/u/averagefruitt
Created: Thu Oct 20 07:06:42 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58gq10/healthy_binges/
---
Do you guys ever binge on healthy food? I have orthorexia and anorexia, so I never binge on junk food, but I always eat healthy food in enormous amounts.. Today I had an entire pineapple, a bag of dates, two cups of oats and a bunch of other stuff. All healthy, but I went way over my usual intake :/ I feel awful right now.
[Intro] [Intro] Glad I've finally found a place I can get this off my chest - I worry whether my boyfriend and I are a "proportional" couple.
/u/nauticaI [5'3.5" | BMI 19.8 | F]
Created: Thu Oct 20 07:03:05 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58gpes/intro_glad_ive_finally_found_a_place_i_can_get/
---
I should be studying for an exam, but instead I just found this sub and created an account. I posted in forums like this once upon a time and always used to edit my information a bit for anonymity, but I'm not hiding anything for now. Sorry if this gets lengthy.
**I'll give a short background to start, but feel free to skip:**
I'm a 22 year old college student about to graduate. I was never technically overweight, but undiagnosed anxiety throughout my childhood made me extremely self conscious. I went on my first diet when I was 11. I remember being starving at the end of the first week, and my mom came into my room, sat with me on my bed, and told me how proud she was of me for trying to improve myself. She has always been so incredibly loving and supportive of me. I wanted to be perfect for my parents and myself. I didn't look back from there and yo-yo dieted until high school when I began purging. It was worst my junior year. I erased all evidence of my junior prom because my face was swollen and I had lost a lot of hair. Early in college, I connected with my roommate over our struggles with food. Once she transferred out to go to rehab for her disorder, I tried to get healthy. I've seen a couple of therapists for anxiety and depression and always hated it even though I'm a psychology major and planned to be a counselor until recently. I've never lasted more than a few sessions, and have never been able to bring up my relationship with food. Sometimes I'm meticulously, obsessively healthy for months and sometimes I eat fast food uncontrollably for months. Sometimes I B/P daily and sometimes I restrict. Sometimes, somehow, I feel completely normal. I am constantly cycling. My weight has fluctuated 20 lbs. throughout college. I was about 135 at my worst. I made it down below 115 this summer, but it has begun creeping up again.
**This brings us to now.**
I spent this summer the lowest weight I've been all of college. I started dating my first real boyfriend, Simon, shortly before. Simon is pretty much perfect for me - from his bizarre sense of humor to his taste in music and literature to his group of friends, I admit we're a match on so many levels; I never could've imagined something like this for myself. I admired him from afar beginning my freshman year, and am not sure how I got so lucky for things to fall into place the way they have. My last summer of uni was nothing short of amazing - one of the best summers I've ever had. It all felt so effortless. I only wanted to keep shrinking, but once classes started back up, I guess I got distracted.
I've begun to put some of the weight back on and can feel things slipping through my fingers. My relationship is wonderful, but these thoughts are driving me nuts. I'm starting to sabotage myself, looking for scabs in my life that I can pick at until they're raw, the way I always do. Simon is a soccer player and in great shape, on the smaller side at 5'7. He is very toned and weighed about 140 when we started dating. But as I've put on 5 lbs., he has dropped 10. I've become consumed with trying to figure out if I'm too big for him. When my weight was steadily below 115, this didn't worry me much at all. Now I feel shallow and ridiculous. Is 3-4 inches enough of a height difference? Do I really feel okay only weighing 10 lbs. less than him? Why am I trying to find problems in an otherwise perfect relationship?
I'm sure no one will read all of this, but I've been itching to talk about it somewhere for what feels like the longest time now, just to get it off my chest. To anyone else, I know I must sound horribly petty. And I don't want to talk with Simon about it because I don't want him to feel like there's anything wrong with him (or me, for that matter). He know's I've struggled with anxiety, but knows nothing about my fucked up relationship with food. I'm just too ashamed to talk about it with anyone.
**So, this is where I am.** I am getting my eating habits back on track. I am re-focusing. To start, I just want to get back below 115, where my problems seemed non-existent. This feels like a reasonable, realistic beginning goal, and I'm not putting any crazy time constraints on it that will throw me off. We'll see where it goes from there. I just want to thank you all for being here and giving me a place to express this judgment-free.
[Other] Weight loss journal post: Ready for November! (I know, way too early)
/u/lightfeathers [5'4" | CW 112 | GW 95 | F]
Created: Thu Oct 20 06:47:01 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58gmqf/weight_loss_journal_post_ready_for_november_i/
---
https://imgur.com/a/PzOnm
[Discussion] Chat group!
/u/fishysandwich [5'3.5 | 115 | GW: 100 | -30 | F]
Created: Thu Oct 20 06:24:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58gjdj/chat_group/
---
Since there's a bunch of people like me wanting a group, let's just start one! Just post your kik below and I'll try to add you all to a group
[Discussion] Weekly Emotional Support October 20, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Thu Oct 20 06:02:51 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58gg4n/weekly_emotional_support_october_20_2016/
---
We're almost all dealing with quite stressful things outside of our eating disorders. Whether it be complicated relationships, friends, university, work or other mental illnesses like depression, anxiety or OCD, we all seem to be having a rougher time emotionally and mentally than the general population.
Use this thread to post about your problems or ask for advice concerning things other than EDs/ED behaviors.
**As always, follow the sub rules when reading or posting.**
*****
Weekly emotional well-being and support threads are posted every Thursday.
Have any questions or concerns? Comment below, or [PM the mods.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FproED)
[Help] how often do I need to get a new scale to be sure that it is rightly calibrated?
/u/ED2134 [168cm | fat | female| -10kg]
Created: Thu Oct 20 03:06:11 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58fw5d/how_often_do_i_need_to_get_a_new_scale_to_be_sure/
---
Okay I kinda freaking out.. don't know exactly why.
One of my biggest fears is that the scale is lying to me. And I have no way of knowing. And that the food scale decides to show a number to low whenever I weigh something that is high in calories.
And i just had this thought that maybe a scale needs to be calibrated every once in a while.
So how often do I need to get a new scale to be sure that it is rightly calibrated? How much off will it be if it is not rightly calibrated because it is in use for ages?
[Other] Illustration, AN
/u/Skinnytw [5'6 | 110 |17.8| F]
Created: Thu Oct 20 03:03:42 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58fvvx/illustration_an/
---
http://imgur.com/a/3fv4V
[Help] anyone else getting purging side effects?
/u/wyydean [5'3| CW125lb | GW100lb | F]
Created: Thu Oct 20 02:16:22 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58frfy/anyone_else_getting_purging_side_effects/
---
ah so back when i mostly used purging instead of restricting i ate key foods to purge easy, ice cream, cereal, etc.-- a year later and i still cant eat these foods without instantly throwing it back up against my will. if i try to fight it my stomach feels so uncomfortable for the rest of the day, is this common?
[Help] trip with new boy
/u/jrste310 [5 ft | 106 lb | 21.34 | -21.5| Female]
Created: Thu Oct 20 01:48:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58fos0/trip_with_new_boy/
---
im going on a vacation with a new guy who i really like- we have yet to have meals together (been really lucky with avoiding them), but obvs staying in a hotel for a weekend idk what to do. I dont want to suck it up and get sent into a binge cycle, but i also dont want him to think im crazy.... urgh and its NYC so i know theres gonna be so much pizza thrown in my face
[Help] Help please I need excuses
/u/little-paws
Created: Thu Oct 20 01:43:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58fo79/help_please_i_need_excuses/
---
[removed]
[Rant/Rave] I get all my calories from just alcohol.
/u/stillinhell [5'4" | 110 lbs | F]
Created: Thu Oct 20 01:28:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58fmp5/i_get_all_my_calories_from_just_alcohol/
---
This isnt an exaggeration. Every day for the past 3 weeks I've been binge-drinking and eating barely any food. Every few days I've been forcing myself to get at least some little dinner delivery, but I really only eat about half of it before putting it away. For some reason, any and all food is so completely unappetizing or appealing. I've been dropping weight quickly and I know this is unhealthy and unsustainable. I really don't want to continue down this path. I've also been using much more cocaine than I'd ever believe I'd do. I've been drinking and doing cocaine alone every night (I live alone). Can anyone relate? Anyone have any advice on how to pull myself out of this? I never binge on food but it feels like this is a similar out-of-control occurrence. Where I suddenly find myself walking to the store to buy more beer. I'm really good at making excuses on why it's justified for me to go to the store or to text the local dealer. I do have AN-Restriction and I know deep down I'm very pleased with the easy weight loss, but I also am realistic and logical and I KNOW this cannot continue. Idk I'm really nervous to post this but I'm hoping that I'm not completely alone. I guess I feel that if I make this post, I'm taking a step forward towards recovery and admitting there's a problem.
[Rant/Rave] Why I'm Back Tonight
/u/originalRedBull [5'5 | 112 | 18.86 | -19 | F]
Created: Thu Oct 20 00:32:22 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58fgie/why_im_back_tonight/
---
Hey guys, so I don't even know exactly how to start. I'm 24.. I've been active in this lovely community on and off for the past year. Well tonight I have a story that brought me back to the one place I could vent about this and be truly understood.
So I have a group of friends, mostly older who I hang out with at a local bar. One of them is the bartender, and the others are all local workers from downtown. I know them pretty well, and the bar has often kind of felt like a safe haven of sorts. Well the bartender tonight (Tom) was in a mood for some reason and just kept giving me shit about how I look. At first it was crude compliments, then it moved on to blunt sexual comments about my chest and ass. My other "friend" (Steve) was drunk and just egging him on. The last actual friend (Max) was sitting there awkwardly and didn't really say anything but would shake his head and roll his eyes etc.
Well these comments just escalate and it is getting the attention of other guys at the bar (probably the only 5 other people there but still).. my anxiety went through the roof. I hate having attention on me and this was terrible attention. I was wearing a hoodie and jeans, not that it really matters except that I CHOSE that outfit because I am at a higher weight I've been at in months (117lbs I think).
Anyway, I'm getting panicked but mostly just drinking and trying to ignore most comments until I hear Tom say "Wow you look like you put on weight." And I just fucking choke on my drink and give some sarcastic answer.. but it doesn't stop. He's like "yeah I knew it, fatty. You're such a lard" (I KID YOU NOT). So he pauses and I just stand up and head towards the bathroom bc I'm about to lose my shit in 3 seconds, and the whole walk back he starts back in and the last thing I hear before slamming the bathroom door was "FATTY!" Again. And I just fucking cried and thought about Steve and all of those perverted men cracking up and I felt like suffocating. I literally just felt like rock bottom trapped in that bathroom, and fearing that laughter but knowing I had to leave.
Sorry this is so long. I'm just so defeated, I've never felt more worthless. It is even worse being in a place I thought was alright. I never want to eat, I feel so ashamed and the cycle I've been in lately is just getting worse. There is no point in recovery when I have to feel so shitty. I just want to go back to numb and hungry, please please please.
I'm on mobile but will try to Flair soon. Thanks for listening :(
[Rant/Rave] Leaving for the waterpark in a few hours and here's how I'm dealing with it.
/u/aerienne [5'5" | 145.8 | F]
Created: Thu Oct 20 00:15:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58fen1/leaving_for_the_waterpark_in_a_few_hours_and/
---
I've been worried about this all week, but have also been working on how I handle stress. I'm getting so much better and I'll feel better today if I get my thoughts out of my head for a bit.
* *I'm worried about how I'll look in my bathing suit:*
Who cares? You'll be in the water. You also found your one piece and that's so much better than being in a bikini right now. You also found some yoga shorts that can pass as board shorts. Even better.
* *The kids I watch over will see that I'm fat*:
Really? You think they can't tell in normal clothes? The only difference now is they'll see your skin. Seriously, get over yourself.
* *The eldest girl is so thin and I'll feel like shit next to her*:
Good. Use it as motivation. She adores you as is. But use this moment to remember whenever you feel like eating.
* *Oh god, I have to eat lunch in front of them in my bathing suit*:
Calm the fuck down. It's sandwich, not a buffet. Pick at the sandwich and hide a few pieces in your towel if you need to. Also, it's a plain PB sandwich. Bread and peanut butter. It's the only thing you'll eat today, so deal with it.
So now some good news:
It's not exactly swimming laps, but swimming burns calories. I also miss being in the water so much. I was a swimmer in high school and college, so it's a part of me.
I'm trying to get my depression medication again. I had some anxiety trying to find a new doctor who speaks English here, but I'm doing it. The medication isn't available in this country for depression, but I'm going to ask for it anyway since it has a history of working.
Usually I work Fridays and Saturdays with Sundays off. As thanks for going to the waterpark, I was just given Friday and Saturday off! That means I can have lunch today and then fast for 3 days! I miss fasting so much and this will make me feel so much better.
That is all for now.
[Rant/Rave] what's the thing you do to bring yourself a sense of certainty?
/u/cactuskey [5'0 | CW: 105lb | GW: 75lb | 26F]
Created: Wed Oct 19 23:23:55 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58f82o/whats_the_thing_you_do_to_bring_yourself_a_sense/
---
i think control issues are pretty standard here. i tagged it rant/rave because it's mostly a lot of ranty personal bullshit, I'm sorry.
Certainty is very scarce in my life. Without proper medication i can't trust myself to do even the smallest things. as if the decisions are made by someone else, who doesn't care if I get fired or don't shower for a week or can't pay my rent. In the worst phase of my depression/ADHD i felt like two people in one body: the person i was when on my meds, and the self-destructive stranger who controlled my body once the pills wore off at the end of the day. I couldn't tell which one of them was more real.
Even with the kind support I got from this sub (thank you!) i was in a panic a few days ago. i'd failed to reach my monthly weight loss goals and was uncertain of every number I saw on the scale. I felt like i couldn't trust any of my results. how much of it is water? poop? PMS? how much of it is even *REAL*?? it felt horribly familiar. So i abandoned long term goals entirely. I let myself have tunnel vision. I re-calculated my TDEE with [this calculator](http://www.sailrabbit.com/bmr/) since it seemed so detailed. Chose the least forgiving options for my body type and lifestyle. let cold hard math be the guide.
It costs my body 3,747 calories of energy to make my heart beat, my limbs move, my blood pump, and my lungs breathe for 3 days. For every 72 hours that I eat 0 calories, i *will* reduce my body mass by 1 lb. some of it will be from fat and some of it will be protein, but it will be REAL and it won't be water. I don't have any post-meal insulin spikes to lock up my fat stores and I don't get to defy the law of thermodynamics. I can trust it happened. No matter what the scale tells me, this time tomorrow there's 1lb less of me. it makes me feel stable.
3 days equals 1lb. I keep telling myself that. It's a mantra. Like I have at least one thing I can trust will be true, if I can just do it right.
[Rant/Rave] I hate restaurants that give you free chips and salsa :(
/u/thisisalliwant
Created: Wed Oct 19 22:54:35 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58f46b/i_hate_restaurants_that_give_you_free_chips_and/
---
I hate myself. I finally got to a check point goal weight and i managed to ruin my carefully counted restriction. Not being able to know exactly how many calories are sitting in front of me gives me so much anxiety. The self sabatoge starts to creep in "it's not that much, you can totally eat those chips and be fine" "you have been doing so well you can eat it".
No! No, i can't. I don't want to!
Today my boyfriend and i went out to eat. I only eat once a day and i knew we would be going out. I ordered a chicken salad sans dressing and a beer. It was completely fine until they brought the chips. My will broke. I could feel my hands reaching for the basket. I tried and i tried to not give in. But i failed. Like the fatass i am, i couldn't say no.
I feel so gross. So incredibly disgusting. I was internally furious with the restaurant for having the nerve to hand out these carb/sodium bombs. I am furious with myself for giving in. It added like 300 calories to my dinner!
I did some quick math trying to ease my mind. I overestimated everything too just in case. I came out to 800 cal for the day. I'm so upset and bloated.
I'm happy i didn't go over my tdee, but i feel like i binged on those damn chips.
I'm going to fast for two days and use an enema. I think i may have just restarted my addiction to laxatives.
Tomorrow is a new day. I hope it will be a better one. I hope you all are doing well 💜
[Other] Group chat?
/u/fishysandwich [5'3.5 | 115 | GW: 100 | -30 | F]
Created: Wed Oct 19 22:12:48 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58ey8r/group_chat/
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Does anyone have one somewhere? I feel kind of isolated and i need to have some people to talk to.
[Meme/Humor] When Google ads hits you with the truth bomb 😂
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Oct 19 21:54:28 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58evfq/when_google_ads_hits_you_with_the_truth_bomb/
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https://i.redd.it/rv6n2d9byjsx.png
[Rant/Rave] [rant] lol grandma came over and caused my binge 🙃
/u/thinkthinlythrowaway
Created: Wed Oct 19 20:15:55 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58eeb6/rant_lol_grandma_came_over_and_caused_my_binge/
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My grandma is the one who first got me fixated on my weight. She would constantly but clothes too small for me saying how I should be a certain size and not the size I was. She is probably 100 pounds max and is like 5 foot maybe.
I forgot she was coming. I hadn't eaten anything and she grabbed my face digging into my fat cheeks to comment on my nose ring.
Then my mom made a remark about how she'd get a tattoo if she lost 10 more pounds. And how I shouldn't get a tattoo until later.
I know what she means.
I'm so gross
I hate everything
I planned on having just veggies for dinner and instead binged on chips and queso, cookies, black bean and rice, guacamole and nuts.
Everything is fine 🙃🙃🙃🙃
[Rant/Rave] I'm not alone thanks to you all
/u/wattshername [5'7" | 143 | 22.4 | Not enough | F]
Created: Wed Oct 19 20:03:47 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58ec30/im_not_alone_thanks_to_you_all/
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Every time I feel an urge to binge, or hear my stomach growl, I sip my coffee and I remind myself of how many others are right there with me.
When I feel hungry I remind myself that I'm not the first to feel this, it's not going to kill me, and that so many of you are feeling the exact same way I am.
And it inspires me to keep moving forward towards my goal!
Today a guy I was talking to decided to end things. I have a feeling it's because he chose another girl. We weren't mutually exclusive, just in that awkward dating/hooking up limbo. I'm still sad and can't help but to think how much prettier and thinner she must be.
But I'm using that image to help me to keep going. I've allowed myself a glass of wine tonight.
[Rant/Rave] Those amazing comments~
/u/krassota
Created: Wed Oct 19 19:12:52 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58e2e5/those_amazing_comments/
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Sometimes I get really shitty comments from friends, like those where they're all "worried."
But tonight! My friend told me that I'm her "weight loss goals." I'm just so so happy and I'm definitely not going to binge while she's here. Even though it's girls wine night, I'm not gonna go over my calorie limit, feeling so so good. Ahhhh.
[Help] I am so bad at fasting :c
/u/radioactiveicedtea [5'3.75"|CW104|18.38|-34|F]
Created: Wed Oct 19 18:31:27 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58dv37/i_am_so_bad_at_fasting_c/
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Whenever I don't eat by mid-day I get super nauseated, dizzy, shakey, and irritated. It sucks because I don't want to waste so much time eating and spend so much money on food. More importantly, I am sick of being stuck at this weight. Right now I average about 1000-1100 calories/day which is awful because I only burn about 1300 calories/day. I don't enjoy food at all :c I just eat to cope with stress and to keep myself from feeling so sick.
[Discussion] Wellbutrin & weight loss?
/u/violettevert [5'6" | fat | -10lbs | NB]
Created: Wed Oct 19 18:25:37 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58du26/wellbutrin_weight_loss/
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Just got prescribed Wellbutrin (buproprion) and I've heard it can make you less hungry/lose weight? You folks have any experiences?
[Discussion] What are your favorite cute sayings or catchy motivational quotes?
/u/Rinskyronsky
Created: Wed Oct 19 17:46:32 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58dnak/what_are_your_favorite_cute_sayings_or_catchy/
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I'll be honest, I'm a total sucker for rhyming ones - *"Skip dinner, wake up thinner!"* is my current favorite. They just stick in my mind better, and are kind of fun to say. What do you guys have in store that are fun, catchy or cute?
[Rant/Rave] Parents just made me eat a huge fucking bowl of spaghetti
/u/throwaway0908123 [5'7 | 120 | 18.73 | -17 | F]
Created: Wed Oct 19 17:19:29 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58dijn/parents_just_made_me_eat_a_huge_fucking_bowl_of/
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The entire thing tasted like rubber. I'm definitely gaining after this, and I just reached my goal weight today. I feel so sick right now, god I wish I could throw up. I want to die.
[Rant/Rave] Under plateau! But probably temporary :/
/u/yellowlettuce [5'9" | CW:152 GW:125 | -83lbs ]
Created: Wed Oct 19 15:50:02 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58d1wb/under_plateau_but_probably_temporary/
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Literally just weighed myself at 149.6!!!!!
155 was my plateau, but now i'm even under 150??
I'm afraid I might go back up again if I eat or drink something, I mean I probably will go back up again :(
I am now motivated to fast for the rest of the day, but I also don't want to end up binging later tonight and ruining everything.
ugh
[Thinspo] Taylor Momsen appreciation post
/u/ikillsouls [5' 2" | 106 | 19.4 | Ugw: 85 |19f]
Created: Wed Oct 19 15:47:47 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58d1hn/taylor_momsen_appreciation_post/
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[because she really is lovely and tiny.](http://imgur.com/a/TXdno)
[Discussion] Weird dream...
/u/rizzle_riz [5'4' | CW:141 | 24.89 | -18 | F]
Created: Wed Oct 19 15:30:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58cyaz/weird_dream/
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Not sure what to flair this or if this is even allowed, but last night I had a weird dream.
Usually I don't ever remember my dreams but last night I dreamt that I kept getting a bloody nose. I don't remember all the details just that I was around friends/people and my nose would start bleeding so I would go to the bathroom clean it and then it would happen again few minutes later. Anyways I googled it because I'm weird and think dreams can be symbolic, and I quite enjoy reading about them, and the first thing that came up was this:
"If you dream you have a bloody nose, what this might suggest is that you have been too harsh on your body lately. Though your body might not be showing any signs of damage, sometimes these are not necessary to conclude that you have been a little too rough with it. Even though you might not see a cut or a bruise, on the inside your body is feeling abused. This is why you are dreaming of a bloody nose, it is the only way for your body to warn you that you have been mistreating yourself."
Seemed really relevant to real life considering I've been wreaking havoc on my body. Anyways, does anyone else look up their dreams? I always find it interesting to find out what they could mean.
[Help] I feel like I'm addicted to sugar.
/u/smallsmallersmallest [166.5cm | CW 52.0kg GW 44kg | 18.90 | -9kg | F]
Created: Wed Oct 19 15:25:51 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58cxba/i_feel_like_im_addicted_to_sugar/
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It genuinely makes up ~90% of what I eat, today all I've eaten is some chocolate, yesterday a buttload of chocolate and a bit of pasta, the day before 200 calories worth of pizza plus chocoalte mints and cake. Pretty much every day is like this, I'll eat loads of sugar and if I eat anything savoury, it's not much. I don't know how to stop doing this, I've tried cutting out sugar entirely but that didn't last long, I've tried just cutting it down but still I end up cracking after not long. Trying to substitute things wouldn't work so well because most natually sweet things, I don't like. I want to stop eating so much sugar, I want to be able to go even a single day without it. It has pretty much no nutritional value, it makes me tired, it makes me bloated, it has soooo many calories, and yet I feel like I can't stop. All of my binges consist of sugary foods too, if it weren't for sugar I probably wouldn't binge as often or as bad. Has anyone got any advice? It's really bringing me down and I don't know what to do anymore. All I can think about is the fact that I would be so much closer to my goal by now if it weren't for this. I can easily restrict other foods and stop eating them when I'm done or full, just not sugar.
[Other] So I'm prematurely breaking my fast tonight on day 9
/u/almightylurker [5'1" | 163.2 | 30.8 | -51.8 | F]
Created: Wed Oct 19 14:40:07 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58co05/so_im_prematurely_breaking_my_fast_tonight_on_day/
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I'm kind of disappointed in myself for not going all the way but I'm happy with the progress I made. I'm currently at my mom's and as all Italian woman react when you refuse their food, she got offended. I love my mom and her cooking is awesome so I'm doing it for her (eating only a small amount though bc I don't feel like dying today.) I'm going back home tomorrow and after some proper refeeding, I'm going back to my normal 1,000 calories a day.
Thank you all so much for your kind words and support, I wouldn't have been able to go anywhere near this far without you <3
End of fast weight: 163.2
[Thinspo] I love these Lucky Jeans, they are a size 4
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Oct 19 14:27:32 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58clcu/i_love_these_lucky_jeans_they_are_a_size_4/
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https://i.imgur.com/WbRHIak.jpg
[Discussion] Binge nightmares?
/u/thukui [5'3 | 114 | GW 88 | -16 | 20F]
Created: Wed Oct 19 14:10:01 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58chox/binge_nightmares/
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(on mobile can't flair sorry)
Does anyone else have nightmares of them binging? I've been fasting for a few days and I keep waking up so stressed out cause I think I ruined my fast until I realize it was just a dream.
[Rant/Rave] I like to think of myself as halfway on the wagon
/u/rainbowsunshinedust [5'5 | 105 | 17.68 | GW 95 | F]
Created: Wed Oct 19 13:39:55 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58cbel/i_like_to_think_of_myself_as_halfway_on_the_wagon/
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Rather than completely out of control. I want to binge today and ruin everything. I've been drinking still but I've cut out most food so I've been losing but it's so hard. My stomach feels like murder. A bite of food feels like a binge. I feel terrified that everything has 1000 more calories than listed. I can't trust anything. I thought I could handle it and went to starbucks today and got a PSL. I ordered nonfat no whip but I feel like she probably made it regular. Like just to sabotage me. I'm trying to keep it together after I had half a muffin and 3 bites of soup and 6 cheezits and I call that 900 calories. I don't know. I wish I had a calorie counter machine that literally told me everything about the food instead of living in anxiety. I'm so goddamn hungry. I hate my brain.
[Rant/Rave] 👏🏻 how 👏🏻 am 👏🏻 i 👏🏻 not 👏🏻 losing 👏🏻 weight 👏🏻
/u/Bubbline
Created: Wed Oct 19 13:06:12 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58c483/how_am_i_not_losing_weight/
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i seem to have a mysterious chronic illness that's most noticeable symptom is extreme nausea and vomiting. i can't smell any kind of food without feeling sick. i vomit 3-12x a day and it fucking SUCKS. i'm a recovered bulimic but i still struggle with ed thoughts.
i've been eating 0-400 cal a day for about a month now. i can only stomach a couple bites at a time of plain food - rice, applesauce, yogurt, jello, stuff like that. and even that stuff makes me sick 75% of the time.
i can hardly hold food down and that means my pills too. i have to take my psych meds with food and i told my psychiatrist that i'm not absorbing them because i've been really depressed/anxious/dissociating a lot and in so much pain i can't move most days. he told me that if i threw up my meds to fish them out of the vomit and try again.
the point of this post isn't for pity or medical advice, but i really want to know- how the fuck am i not losing weight at such a huge calorie deficit???
every time i go into the doctor (so like...6x/month) my weight is the same +/- 5 lbs. i'm not a waif. i have a LOT of weight to lose so it doesn't make sense. i feel like my doctors don't believe that i'm not eating because i'm not losing weight.
i feel like no one believes how much pain i'm in and i'm just miserable. i had to take a 45 day medical leave from work and i don't think i can go back. i love my job but i can't even drive anymore. i keep getting dizzy and overheated and i faint a lot. i'm always shaky and i have horrible brain fog. i lose my words all the time. its hell...and i'm still fat. i might not be as mad at my illness if it made me lose weight...which mathematically it fucking should.
tl;dr i'm eating 0-400cal a day and not losing weight, WTF is going on
[Rant/Rave] I feel like a bucket of lard. Just ranting...
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Oct 19 12:46:19 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58c04b/i_feel_like_a_bucket_of_lard_just_ranting/
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[deleted]
[Meme/Humor] this is all of us
/u/thelonelykitten_
Created: Wed Oct 19 12:21:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58buwk/this_is_all_of_us/
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http://imgur.com/OabaB8Z
[Discussion] This has probably been asked and discussed a lot. But any tips on BED?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Oct 19 12:05:12 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58brhm/this_has_probably_been_asked_and_discussed_a_lot/
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[deleted]
[Discussion] What is your hobby?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Oct 19 11:58:25 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58bq0s/what_is_your_hobby/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] getting 'oversensitive' about food
/u/archerofdawn [154cm | CW 157 | GW 88 | -7 | NB]
Created: Wed Oct 19 11:47:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58bnza/getting_oversensitive_about_food/
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vague self harm tw
I've been fasting until 6pm recently and today was no exception, except my parents made me try some of the dinner stuff they were planning since we're having guests over. I took a minimal amount and left some for my parents (since my dad was trying it too so I figured they'd eat it) except my mom comes up to my room and makes me eat it like literally putting it against my mouth
and then I can't help but tell her that I didn't want to eat it because I was pissed and I think I hurt her. She told me that she thought I would have liked to eat it (I wish I could translate this properly but it had a nuance of 'I was thinking of you', 'I wanted to make you happy' and 'I'm sorry') and now I'm going to be late for class because I'm crying and hurting myself because my mom doesn't need any of that she was just being nice lmao l ma o I can't fucking believe myself I'm in better control all the other times and I hate this!! I hate being on edge about food like this!!! fuck me haha
eta: I apologized and things are okay (I told her I was really stressed and not hungry, which were true), I think I just have to be more dissembling when it comes to food. I don't want them to worry and I feel bad
[Discussion] Desktop Background Thread!
/u/Alexa1p [5'5'' | 110 | 18 | -10.7 | F]
Created: Wed Oct 19 11:24:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58bivn/desktop_background_thread/
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I'm trying to find lovely, thinspo backgrounds for my mac. If anyone has a link to something with a nice resolution, and is also big enough to size nicely to a computer screen (I have the MacBook Air, so my screen is tinier than most), please drop your submission here. <3
Thanks, all.
[Rant/Rave] Listen to your body
/u/Weazin_the_Ju-uice
Created: Wed Oct 19 10:57:25 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58bd5p/listen_to_your_body/
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[removed]
[Goal] From fat-> to borderline ed-> now (2000 cals a day)
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Oct 19 10:44:45 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58baic/from_fat_to_borderline_ed_now_2000_cals_a_day/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/fa18d73fa30c4560bb069e37b1f95a11?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=20e5ef46b9fd8123a49d58885e07d2c8
[Rant/Rave] On my lunch break
/u/hh_lb
Created: Wed Oct 19 10:26:29 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58b6sl/on_my_lunch_break/
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I'm with my coworker and we go into a gas station to get cigarettes and I get two Powerade zeros. We leave and she pulls through Wendy's to get three Jr. Bacon Cheeseburgers. Powers that be.... please help me.
[Discussion] Daily Food Diary! October 19, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Wed Oct 19 10:02:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58b21o/daily_food_diary_october_19_2016/
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This is a daily food diary thread for October 19, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
[Other] last week's grocery haul
/u/ppyeoreul-mudgosipeo [5'6 | 2 Days w/o Binge | BMI 26.9 | F]
Created: Wed Oct 19 09:45:15 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58ayj9/last_weeks_grocery_haul/
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http://i.imgur.com/kTEG8fs.jpg
[Other] Beautiful illustrations of mental illness and disorders (#11: AN, but every single one is worth a look)
/u/Skinnytw [5'6 | 110 |17.8| F]
Created: Wed Oct 19 09:30:06 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58avko/beautiful_illustrations_of_mental_illness_and/
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http://www.boredpanda.com/for-inktober-i-focused-on-mental-illness-and-disorders/
[Goal] I ate my big trigger food without B/P
/u/H2OandCaffeine [5ft7 | FAT | -20 lbs | F]
Created: Wed Oct 19 08:51:53 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58ao3b/i_ate_my_big_trigger_food_without_bp/
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I had a reasonable amount and didn't purge. I'm so happy about this. :D
[Other] Today is a good day!
/u/little-paws
Created: Wed Oct 19 08:42:39 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58amb4/today_is_a_good_day/
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http://imgur.com/yC9OZuG
[Rant/Rave] I don't know what to do
/u/borrow_our_light [5'7| 146 | 24 | -17lbs | F | GW 115]
Created: Wed Oct 19 08:18:24 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58ahtq/i_dont_know_what_to_do/
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Recently I have been living on my own (without my girlfriend staying for more than one night a week) which has allowed me to restrict and fast more. But recently my girlfriend has been picking up on a few of my habits. Today she texted me and told me to send her a picture of everything I eat today. She said she noticed that I didn't eat anything yesterday and she just wants to make sure I don't pass out today. I don't know what to do with this situation, I love her but she cannot control what I do and don't eat
[Other] Ended my fast early
/u/DenyMyHunger [5'7"| Fat! | UGW:112| F]
Created: Wed Oct 19 08:18:16 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58ahss/ended_my_fast_early/
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[removed]
[Discussion] (What) do you eat (for) breakfast?
/u/heyhiohhello [5'6"/f/21 | UGW 51.8 [18.0]]
Created: Wed Oct 19 07:51:55 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58ad3s/what_do_you_eat_for_breakfast/
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I usually do not eat breakfast, because breakfast food is all carbs and usually sugar, AND I'm afraid that food that I eat earlier in the day might barrel me over my limit if I unintentionally cave and eat lunch or some bullshit - but it's the only time of the day (other than at night.. when I am afraid of absorbing fats as I sleep :< ) that I can eat without my SOs housemates seeing me eat (of which I have anxiety about bc I dont want them to think I'm a freeloader by using the stove or touching their cutlery, idk..) - but I fasted all day yesterday and my brain was grumpy so I ate a piece of bread. 60 calories?
and then I started freaking out, of course 8-)
So I was just wondering, as a person who hates breakfast, what have you adopted as a safe breakfast? Do you only eat breakfast like I only eat dinner? What's your breakfast plan look like? What is your breakfast calorie limit? Do you skip breakfast? Isn't the work break-fast kinda neat? :)
[Discussion] A healthier approach to dealing with cravings
/u/wittywaif [5'6" | whale | -85 | f]
Created: Wed Oct 19 07:47:55 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58acgv/a_healthier_approach_to_dealing_with_cravings/
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mods, i'm not sure how appropriate this is so feel free to remove the post if it breaks the rules, in no way am i offering tips or tricks but i would like to have more informed discussions here on the sub. i know a lot of us here restrict, binge, purge and are on generally unhealthy cyclical patterns when it comes to food. to me this sub is integral for harm reduction so i figured i would post a summary of an interesting study i read about cravings and appropriate coping mechanisms on how to deal with them. if you'd like to read the article yourself on pubmed [here is the link!](https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/17544361)
there are two common approaches when it comes to dealing with cravings. the first is a **control based strategy**, in this method you hide away any highly addictive or hyper palatable food to avoid cravings, think: out of sight out of mind. this can also be achieved by trying to distract yourself during a craving (like an activity) or by following a routine / more structured eating plan. the caveat of this method is that sometimes it can have a reverse psychology like effect, "do not push this button" tempts you into pushing the button and the same goes for food.
the second is an **acceptance based strategy** which doesn't aim to block or reduce the impulse, craving or thought but rather to actively accept the fact that you have limited control over your thoughts and feelings, keeping this in mind while promoting goal oriented behaviours. this could be exemplified through meditation, mindful eating, self-narration (or stepping back known better as diffusion) and essentially taking a step back, acknowledging the feeling and simply letting it pass. this is similar to the technique outlined in [brain over binge](http://www.goodreads.com/book/show/12359062-brain-over-binge) a popular book that i really recommend if you like learning about eating disorders, particularly bulimia but i think it really goes over compulsive behaviours well.
*mini version of the study for those interested:* students were given clear containers of chocolates and asked specifically not to eat them, whilst keeping them on their person around the clock for the next two days. any time the students had a craving they were to record that incident. the students were grouped into three categories
* no intervention (just told to go do their own thing).
* another group was given counselling on a control based approach (how to distract themselves when a craving would arise)
* the third group was given counselling on the acceptance based strategy (being told to experience the craving, no point in avoiding it) and were given the mnemonic **DAWN** meaning: distancing, acceptance, willingness and noticing to understand this strategy better.
what the researchers noticed (and why i am writing this post) is that one approach (a control based vs an acceptance based) was not inherently better. but certain approaches worked better for certain people (measured using a power of food scale).
subjects who were more susceptible to food cravings, in general are more sensitive to what is available to them tended to do better with the acceptance based approach. people who didn't get cravings as often or perhaps weren't that sensitive to their food environment tended to do better with a control based approach.
**tl;dr** eating disorders are complicated and by no means does one study map perfectly onto every individual. many people track their food meticulously which is a form of a control based strategy, and i think this may potentially exacerbate the issue of cravings. control and acceptance based strategies are both useful when dealing with cravings in a healthy way, and those more sensitive to their food environment / prone to cravings may fare better with an acceptance based strategy or at least a hybrid combination of the two.
this was just a one off on an interesting paper i read, i am not a scientist or a doctor, but i do like reading scientific articles. so let me know if you'd like to see these occasionally or just keep it as a one off. :)
[Rant/Rave] I know I can't lift well fasted. My routine has moves that I'm not great with form on and need to be focused. Here I am going to lift fasted anyway.
/u/smokesanddietcokes [Adipose Industries]
Created: Wed Oct 19 07:08:35 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58a5z1/i_know_i_cant_lift_well_fasted_my_routine_has/
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Sub 200kcal the last two days, made up of diet coke and 10kcal worth of sugar free jelly each day, besides some cooked mushrooms Monday night. It's probably less than that because I didn't drink quite that much diet coke.. I just stick 100kcal on my calorie logs straight out to account for my diet coke addiction, as I know it will always be less than that and I'd rather overestimate.
If I eat some oats before going, I will lift alright and probably be safe enough while doing it. My body seems very sensitive to eating now, one small meal seems to be the difference between being able to focus fine and not.
But I'm not hungry, and I don't want to eat, so I probably wont. My feel woozy, my head hurts, I have stars infront of my eyes already.. but I am not hungry and don't want ot eat.
But I need to go to the gym, as I get a new routine on Friday and still have one session of this one left to do. I wont have my PT watching over me though, so I'm considering going in, grabbing my sheet, and lying on it. Filling it in the same as last session, where I did okay, but then in reality lightening everything up and doing different exercises I am more confident with so I will be safe..
But that's lying to my PT. That's 'not eating' becoming more important than my lifting. That's hindering progress..
The fact that 'not eating' is becoming more important than even my lifting and my honesty with my PT, who is doing his best to see me progress and taken a special interest in me off his own back, scares me.
I still probably wont eat.
*A funny: When I wrote 'hindering' in that post just then, I first typoed it as 'hungering'. Lol.*
[Discussion] What are your grocery staples and/or recent grocery finds?
/u/xtinytoadx [5'4" | 78 | 13.65 | F]
Created: Wed Oct 19 07:07:39 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58a5tn/what_are_your_grocery_staples_andor_recent/
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Going grocery shopping today so just trying to get some new ideas. ^_^
I always get chicken tenderloins, bagged salad, coffee creamer, fiber and protein bars, and occasionally Halo Top (mint chip and lemon are my favorites).
I've been making breakfast burritos with flat wraps from Aldis which are only about 90 cal per wrap.
Recently I found No Cow bars which are basically vegan quest bars at GNC, but they are much too expensive and I tend to binge on them. T_T I requested Wink vegan icecream and the Now Cow bars at my local Whole Foods so we'll see if they stock them in a few weeks!
[Rant/Rave] (Rant) Those out-of-control moments :(
/u/rbracket [5'2" | CW 99.4lbs | GW 99lbs | BMI 18.83 | M]
Created: Wed Oct 19 06:39:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58a1d6/rant_those_outofcontrol_moments/
---
On mobile; can't flair. Sorry!
I went to the shop today planning on buying just coffee for a fast and came away with £10 worth of food that I've just binged and purged - and I didn't have £10 to spare this week. :( Doesn't sound like much but I don't have much to my name. Goodbye savings, literally flushed down the toilet - and to think a tenner used to buy me food for at least two weeks.
Maybe tomorrow can be a fresh start. I'm sick of obsessing over what I put into my body. Paring it down to water, electrolytes, and the odd coffee seems so simple to do but when bingemode kicks in it's like I'm watching myself through a TV screen. I know how damaging it is but I just can't stop myself.
Oh well. I'm hovering somewhere around 101lbs at the minute, hopefully I'll still hit 99 by Monday assuming I don't sabotage myself again. C'est la vie.
[Tip] I'd like some tips
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Oct 19 06:30:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58a01a/id_like_some_tips/
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[removed]
[Discussion] Way To Go Wednesday October 19, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Wed Oct 19 06:03:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/589w4z/way_to_go_wednesday_october_19_2016/
---
This is the weekly achievement thread for October 19, 2016.
This weekly thread is to spotlight those achievements you feel don't necessarily warrant their own post, but you'd like to celebrate all the same. This is not limited to specifically ED-related goals; share anything you are happy about having done or accomplished recently!
*****
Achievement threads are posted every Wednesday.
Have any questions or concerns? Comment below, or [PM the mods.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FproED)
[Discussion] Minimising anxiety about eating?
/u/RockinWeasel
Created: Wed Oct 19 05:44:39 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/589toi/minimising_anxiety_about_eating/
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Am I alone in the all consuming panic/ dread whenever you know you will have to eat due to company?
I had a work lunch today and ate some veggies and a banana, avoiding the calorie-laden sandwiches and crisps. Now tonight I have a friend coming over. I will be expected to eat. This is sending me into a total panic. I have already eaten enough for the day, and I am going to have to eat. If I didn't eat something at work people would think it was weird too.
I know logically if I make a salad and grill chicken I'll still be under 500 calories today and it will be fine, but I am still freaking out. Anyone else deal with this? Anyone have any tips for coping with it?
Edit: in the end I cooked a chicken breast and made a small salad. I cut up the chicken then ignored it and ate some of the spinach leaves and cherry tomatoes. My downfall was a small glass of red wine, but it was worth the calories. Still ended the day under 400 calories hurray.
[Help] Would fasting interfere with wound healing?
/u/aaren0 [5'5 | shisno]
Created: Wed Oct 19 04:48:03 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/589mvc/would_fasting_interfere_with_wound_healing/
---
(tw for self harm and shit; I am dumb)
So uh yeah, I may have *accidentally* acquired a few large lacerations - on my leg, chest, and arms - over the course of this past week... They haven't received medical attention but they're healing well so far and I take good care of them.
So er, was just wonderin if anyone from this community'd have any information about this? Would fasting slow the healing process or make infection more likely (or result in my sudden inexplicable demise or some shit like that)?
Sorry for this post. Will delete if I get complaints. :(
[Discussion] Does restricting ease your anxiety?
/u/little-paws
Created: Wed Oct 19 03:29:29 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/589efy/does_restricting_ease_your_anxiety/
---
I've been feeling really anxious for the past few weeks - constantly on the verge of tears etc. because of the amount of university work I have.
Yesterday, I was cycling home from the gym and I started feeling anxious about how much work I had to do. But then, I just thought 'hey, but it's okay - you've only had 200 calories today'... and I felt better. I didn't feel anxious, I felt totally in control.
Does anyone else get this?
[Discussion] Does anyone else do this!!!???
/u/reallynuggie
Created: Wed Oct 19 02:31:52 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5898v4/does_anyone_else_do_this/
---
If I find myself craving, I always watch those Tasty videos on Facebook or find a tasty food compilation and just watch people make yummy food! Does anyone else do this? It helps me not binge so much.
[Goal] I felt powerful for the first time
/u/Please445leave
Created: Wed Oct 19 01:13:55 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5891a3/i_felt_powerful_for_the_first_time/
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[removed]
[Discussion] What's your favourite 'goal' body part?
/u/savetheexplosion [5'2 | fat | Female]
Created: Wed Oct 19 00:55:59 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/588z9n/whats_your_favourite_goal_body_part/
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Probably phrased wrong.. basically, what's your favourite body part to look at for thinspo, what do you want to be perfect on you the most?
For me, it's collarbones. I am constantly putting my hands up to make sure they're prominent. Whenever I look up thinspo it's always collarbones or at least a picture where collarbones are showing.
Just curious what you guys like the look of the best. :)
[Rant/Rave] how do i get willpower?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Oct 19 00:27:42 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/588w8c/how_do_i_get_willpower/
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[removed]
[Rant/Rave] Being diabetic
/u/wanskie [5'5 | cw: 135 | bmi: 22.5 | F]
Created: Wed Oct 19 00:07:52 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/588u06/being_diabetic/
---
I'm so sick of being diabetic, before being diagnosed I was able to do fairly long fasts but now I can't even go 6 hours without feeling like I'm about to pass out. I'm gaining so much weight from my insulin and feel so disgusting all the time
I live in Canada and it's already super cold here. I tried to go out and buy a winter jacket the other day and everything just looked so ugly and big on me. I wish I was never diagnosed so I didn't have to be dependent on insulin (｡•́︿•̀｡)
[Help] Will I still be/on my way to ketosis if I have a cup of broth during a fast?
/u/chocolatecoveredpugs [5'4| 118| 20.6 | -22lbs | F]
Created: Tue Oct 18 23:43:22 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/588r4t/will_i_still_beon_my_way_to_ketosis_if_i_have_a/
---
Sorry on mobile, can't flair.
So I am on hour 50 of a fast and previously only had water and Diet Coke. I was feeling really dizzy after working out and didn't have any Powerade Zero or any low-cal electrolytic drinks at home except for broth. It's 5 calories for a cube but will that stop me from being in ketosis/on my way to ketosis?
[Discussion] DAE Have Sleep Issues?
/u/ForeverEmptyInside [5'9"| CW:115 lbs | BMI 17 | LW:104lbs | M]
Created: Tue Oct 18 23:10:14 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/588n4h/dae_have_sleep_issues/
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Does anybody on this sub have sleep issues?
Usually, I don't have any issues with my sleep. However, when you throw my eating disorder into the mix I find that my sleep issues go through the roof. When I am restricting I sleep wayyy too much because I am constantly tired. When I am fasting (especially for long periods of time) I can't sleep AT ALL. Like right now I am about 8.5 days into my fast and It's currently 1am and I am not tired. A couple days ago I went 36 hours without sleep. This is a problem as it's interfering with my university work.
thoughts?
Aarrrgghhh
/u/miffedmeow
Created: Tue Oct 18 22:39:20 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/588j5u/aarrrgghhh/
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[removed]
[Rant/Rave] I keep telling myself I can stop whenever I want. But I don't think I can.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Oct 18 22:13:15 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/588fl3/i_keep_telling_myself_i_can_stop_whenever_i_want/
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[deleted]
[Goal] i haven't been looking at this sub as much
/u/hayleystark [5'4"|NB]
Created: Tue Oct 18 21:49:34 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/588c22/i_havent_been_looking_at_this_sub_as_much/
---
i'd like to say it's because i may be getting out of my "restricting" phase of my ED (it comes and goes in cycles, has for years) but according to the scale at work (i work in a vet office so i always check my weight there since the scales are calibrated once a month) i've been losing weight pretty steadily. i guess i'm just getting more depressed, but i'm glad finding this sub has worked. :)
[Discussion] After Dinner/Late Night Snack?
/u/concuidado [4'11 | 83 lbs | 17.8 | -62| F]
Created: Tue Oct 18 21:46:33 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/588bms/after_dinnerlate_night_snack/
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What do you guys eat for an after dinner snack? I usually have some light popcorn, fat free hot chocolate, or halo top but these are becoming boring and too expensive. Do you guys have any idea for some good snacks that relatively low cal (under 100)?
[Goal] I finally threw out my chocolate hoard!
/u/Casablanca_Insomnia [5'3 | TOO MUCH | -21 | GW: 87 | F]
Created: Tue Oct 18 20:50:43 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5882yb/i_finally_threw_out_my_chocolate_hoard/
---
As some of you may remember, I have a issue with hording junk. As of today the shitty food collection no longer exists! Not out of fear of binging but out of a new dedication to my goal. Food will no longer rule me and I will no longer waste money on stuff to torture myself with.
Weird thing to be so proud of but I figured maybe one person here would understand :)
[Discussion] What's more gross: rinsing the mayo from potato salad or the fact they added so much mayo to begin with?
/u/CowOffTheFarm [65" | 145 | 24.41 | - | F | GW 120]
Created: Tue Oct 18 20:33:51 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5880bx/whats_more_gross_rinsing_the_mayo_from_potato/
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It actually tasted better afterwards, but I don't really care for mayo anyway.
McAllister's if you were wondering. The serving has 220 calories, but I think the rinse got it under 100. Hopefully...
[Rant/Rave] Satan take the wheel!
/u/dirtandherbs [Height 5'2 | CW 102 | BMI 18.02 | Female]
Created: Tue Oct 18 20:27:37 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/587zb8/satan_take_the_wheel/
---
I am proud of myself in that delusional, fucked-up, i-have-an-eating-disorder kind of way. The past three days I've kept under my 500 goal. I have relapsed completely. I can tell I'm thinner already. I'm elated and dizzy. It feels like I've sold my soul to the devil. I can't wait to get back down to my double-digits... back to my comfortable 90 lbs. I am finally starting to feel like I'm in control. I cleverly avoided eating any pizza when my coworkers bought some for work today. I love pizza! Pizza is my ultimate weakness. It was like the test of will power I needed... an affirmation of my self control. I feel better about myself than I have in months.
[Discussion] Do you have a number of calories that you consider a "binge"?
/u/yellowlettuce [5'9" | CW:152 GW:125 | -83lbs ]
Created: Tue Oct 18 20:13:23 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/587wzd/do_you_have_a_number_of_calories_that_you/
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Is there any defining number you have? Or just anything that puts you over your number?
I told my friend about one of my (typical) binges, and she told me that it "wasn't a binge." But binges totally exist along a continuum. One person with an ED may binge and consume literally thousands of calories, whereas another person with an ED may binge and consume much, much less. Consuming less calories during a binge does not invalidate the emotional distress a person often experiences following a binge.
So then that brings me to my confusing question (do i even have a question?):
Typically during a binge, do you tend to consume <300cal? Is it different each time? Do you tend to binge at night?
Any other discussion regarding the subject is encouraged!!!!
[Discussion] Pavlok?
/u/get-it_together [5'3 |160??| UGW 125 | F]
Created: Tue Oct 18 19:59:51 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/587un3/pavlok/
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I saw it on this dumbass buzzfeed article I was reading after a binge. It's made by some people off shark tank and it's like a little shock collar that attaches to your wrist that shocks you when you start to do a bad habit. I had to share because I don't know how to feel about it lmfao
[Discussion] How do you feel about your hips?
/u/kpatable [5'9" | 127.4 | 18.5/18.8 | -19.6 | F]
Created: Tue Oct 18 18:55:56 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/587jol/how_do_you_feel_about_your_hips/
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I am "triangle shaped" I.e. I have broader shoulders. I actually like the size of my hips - I wish my shoulders and especially my rib cage were smaller, though. Yes, if my hips were wider, I'd have a more feminine frame. But then I'd be wider. Idk. I feel weird about my hips. I know they are narrow compared to the rest of me, but I'd rather the rest of me shrink than my hips widen.
[Rant/Rave] Thanks, lifesum. I know I just binged. I appreciate your input. 😷😷🖕
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Oct 18 18:55:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/587jjt/thanks_lifesum_i_know_i_just_binged_i_appreciate/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/dcef5938559b4a68978a4a9dc21509cd?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=4f24928c9c8011265297cc8f4b5f12f9
[Rant/Rave] 425 calories
/u/procoyo [5'6" | 190lb | GW:140lb | -5lb | F]
Created: Tue Oct 18 18:51:45 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/587iyp/425_calories/
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This is not how I wanted to spend my first official day of attempting, sitting here and feeling like a fuck up for what I've eaten. It didn't seem like much, at the time. I had carefully selected what I would have, even rewarding myself with 160 calories of ground turkey. I was sad that I might miss Taco Tuesday, so I had 4oz as well as 9 blue corn chips and a literal pinch of cheese. But as 5pm came closer, which is my cut off time, I got so nervous that I might become weaker later tonight that I caved in. I pushed myself over 400 and I feel like shit for it. It's definitely going to be a moment I think back on in the future, when I either want to eat more than allotted or just feel snacky. I don't want to feel like this anymore. The semblance of control I thought I had feels ripped away from my hands. I had counted those calories so perfectly, and then I did that... I'm beyond miserable.
I resolve to be better tomorrow. I resolve to not break my own limits anymore. I will lose +50lbs.
Honestly, I don't know what my goal is. I know I wasn't happy even when I was at my thinnest, 140lbs. I think it's because I knew I was not taking control like I should have. I failed in my discipline. I know I'm stronger than this.
I'm going to an exercise class tonight. I'm going to work my ass off as hard as I can to make up for this failure.
Edit: Just got home from class. Turns out that you can lose between 290-400 calories in the beginner class, and that made me feel so much better. I'm only listing 250 on MFP, though.
[Goal] DAE weight themselves before and after a BM?
/u/Edible_pain [5 foot 6 in| 133 | -over 100lbs| F]
Created: Tue Oct 18 18:33:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/587fyl/dae_weight_themselves_before_and_after_a_bm/
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I dont always do this, but I sometimes weigh myself before and after a BM to see the weight difference.
[Rant/Rave] DAE look at overweight people in their outfits and think "how can they be so confident?"
/u/pinotblanc [5'3 | GW:115 | 23.2 | -23 | F]
Created: Tue Oct 18 18:12:26 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/587c6x/dae_look_at_overweight_people_in_their_outfits/
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I always see people on my facebook and celebrities who advocate positive body images and I think how much prettier they would look if they were thinner.
Then I get envious of how confident they are at any body weight and in any outfit and I'm sad that I'll never be confident in my body. At 150 or at 98 pounds I know I'll never be satisfied. I'll always be disgusted by my naked body, uncomfortable in any outfit, and ashamed.
This stems from seeing a celebrity in a skimpy outfit today that didn't leave much to the imagination. Meanwhile, I'm over here and I can't even wear a tank top.
:/
[Help] I've barely eaten today and and I can't sleep
/u/little-paws
Created: Tue Oct 18 18:07:27 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/587bb0/ive_barely_eaten_today_and_and_i_cant_sleep/
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I've had about 150 calories of soup today.
It's now 2am and I'm lying awake in bed and I can't sleep. I have to go to the gym in 6 hours. How awful will I feel in the morning?
[Other] Bombed a test, not passing the class, and am still up 2lbs from my last binge, so I'm spending my last few hundred calories today on vodka
/u/onlyroom_forthin [5'6 | CW:149.6 | 24.24 | SW:165 | UGW:120 | F]
Created: Tue Oct 18 17:26:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5874bd/bombed_a_test_not_passing_the_class_and_am_still/
---
:D :D :D :D I'm a failure :D :D :D :D
[Rant/Rave] Binge binge binge (rant)
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Oct 18 17:21:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5873dj/binge_binge_binge_rant/
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[deleted]
[Other] i cant poop.
/u/Edible_pain [5 foot 6 in| 133 | -over 100lbs| F]
Created: Tue Oct 18 16:04:45 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/586ow3/i_cant_poop/
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[removed]
[Rant/Rave] My grocery store thinspo, I feel like you might read this.
/u/thinfetish
Created: Tue Oct 18 14:25:24 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5864q5/my_grocery_store_thinspo_i_feel_like_you_might/
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Last night I was at Kroger picking up a few things for dinner and we ran into each other in the produce section. You were loading up on veggies and you stopped me in my tracks. I sat there pretending to look at a potato, but I was literally in awe of your collar bones peaking out the top of your over-sized sweat shirt. Your shorts were tiny but at least two sizes too big for your legs. I was inspired by your strength and your perfection. I realized you were, like me, carefully calculating every item added to your cart. I could tell that you shared my special anxiety, in that moment. I left feeling inspired to be stronger. If you read this, thank you.
[Intro] Lurker to Poster
/u/possiblycurious [5'5"| 142|GW 125| -8lbs| F]
Created: Tue Oct 18 14:25:01 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5864mv/lurker_to_poster/
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[removed]
[Discussion] what are some low cal candies?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Oct 18 13:55:39 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/585ydp/what_are_some_low_cal_candies/
---
[removed]
[Rant/Rave] Thought I was going to implode last night, worst panic attack yet
/u/epasternack [5'7" | CW 127 | GW 120 | BMI 19.9 | -33lbs | 22 F]
Created: Tue Oct 18 13:04:18 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/585ndv/thought_i_was_going_to_implode_last_night_worst/
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I ate dinner (1 serving quinoa + whole box of mushrooms wow only like 180 calories!) and then my stomach started hurting. And then it started getting worse. And my gut started hurting. And I started getting cramps. And then I lay down but couldn't get up. And I started getting a dry mouth and nausea. And then uncontrollable crying. I thought I was going to die right there on the spot. My heart rate was SO HIGH. I had no idea what to do. Eventually I calmed down but I think my anxiety is getting worse and worse as time goes on. And then I ate toast and cheese :( so yet another day of restricting failed.
Seems like I'm failing at everything these days! What fun. Literally no idea what to do with my life. I have 13 more lbs to go until I reach my goal and honestly I am not even sure I am going to like what I see when I get there. I think I might be dissatisfied and I might still have love handles. No idea.
Sorry for the rant. Had to get it out.
[Discussion] When & How did your ED start?
/u/dontcareifithurts__ [5'4.5 | 117 | - 4.2 | F]
Created: Tue Oct 18 11:12:02 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/584zjh/when_how_did_your_ed_start/
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Sorry to those of you who are long standing members and have seen posts like this before, but I'm new and I'm curious as to how everyone got to where they are today.
Also sorry for no flair, I'm always on mobile and my phone is too full to download any new apps. :/
The disordered thoughts started when I was about 12 but I didn't take action until I was about 14. A few distinct things stand out in my mind that triggered it.
1. I gained about 10 pounds between grade 8 and 9, and I didn't like it because I had always been really skinny and everyone kept commenting on my "womanly" figure and it was so awkward.
2. I discovered calories
3. I had very few friends and didn't get along with my mom and my parents are divorced & remarried and I have those "daddy issues" you hear about, basically I felt like I had no parental figures that cared about me. Starting high school sucked because nobody liked me and I got bullied a lot. Then my best friend stopped being friends with me for an entire year (then realized he was stupid and we became besties again)
4. I was depressed and self-harming and my parents laughed it off as a phase and didn't get me the help I needed
5. I got really sick for about 2 weeks and lost 5 pounds. That was all I needed to kick start my weight loss and then I lost 15 more pounds over the next 2 months until I hit 98 and my teachers all started getting concerned and contacting my parents and my extended family was concerned (but again my parents didn't care) and I went to the hospital for a bunch of little things until I finally learned to hide my ED and wear bulkier clothes and more makeup so I didn't look like I was dying anymore.
6. What solidified it and prevented recovery was that my mom praised my thinness constantly. Always. She always told everyone in the family how great I looked and she even measured my waist and arms in comparison to my brothers (who was 5 at the time this happened) and thought it was so hilarious that we were practically the same size. Anytime I gained weight she mentioned it and pointed it out.
There's obviously details left out and way more to the story but that's the gist.
TL/DR: Tell me when & why your eating disorder started. Mine started at 14 because my mom's a bitch & teenagers are bitches & I was sad and kind of a bitch & nobody took me seriously. The end.
[Help] cheecha puffs in toronto?
/u/archerofdawn [154cm | CW 157 | GW 88 | -7 | NB]
Created: Tue Oct 18 11:09:13 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/584yzg/cheecha_puffs_in_toronto/
---
I've been to two places that had them according to the website (booster juice in north american centre and sunlong organic market) and found nothing ;; has anyone managed to buy these in a ttc-able location?
eta in case someone else in the future has a similar question: after contacting cheecha puffs, they told me about a few locations and the bed/bath/beyond right by college station was the only one i could get to without a car. but they had the ketchup flavour and the three cheeses flavour and !!!! three cheeses!!! was so good omg
[Goal] Currently on hour 20/48 of my first ever fast!
/u/DenyMyHunger [5'7"| Fat! | UGW:112| F]
Created: Tue Oct 18 10:45:20 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/584tue/currently_on_hour_2048_of_my_first_ever_fast/
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I know a lot of people here fast often and it's not a big deal but I'm really proud of myself! Coffee, water and Monster zero are really curbing my rumbly tumbly 😂
Going for 48 hours as it's my first time.
Wish me luck! <3
[Help] my sugardaddy just invited me to an opera in an hour and a half, but I'm 114 hours into a 120 hour water-only fast!!!
/u/UnrequitedOrgasms [19F | 5'6 | CW:129 | -31 | GW: 105]
Created: Tue Oct 18 10:38:29 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/584scj/my_sugardaddy_just_invited_me_to_an_opera_in_an/
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You can bet your ass I'm not breaking it with so little to go! he normally gets me awesome cocktails and will definitely wonder why I'm just getting water- this fast doesn't involve anything other than water so I'm stuck. He's asked why I'm getting just water/soft drinks before. He was a fucking vag doctor so I'm worried about making up an illness/blaming it on my period lol, and he knows me so he knows I'll drink any time of the month (or day...)
I'm hoping to get through the show with just water but at the end I'll still have two and a half hours to go- I'm hoping he'll just drop me off at mine after and I can pick up some juice to break my fast like planned, but I really really really will be so fucked up if I break my fast just hours before I'm supposed to.
Does anyone have any advice for how to not seem suspicious? I could joke about being pregnant cause I know he'd definitely laugh but he wouldn't accept it
[Rant/Rave] struggling
/u/lllbt
Created: Tue Oct 18 10:24:24 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/584pe9/struggling/
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The past three days have been pretty bad in terms of overeating. I also haven't compensated for eating so much (purging/exercising) so I'm feeling even more horrible and out of control. On top of that I've been drinking too much booze and I feel like my antidepressants aren't working anymore.
Not really sure how to get back on track. Taking a day off from college and trying to reorganize my messy brain.
I think I'm just going to try and get back to my normal routine of eating 1000 cals a day because if I fast I might risk just binging later or whatever.
For those struggling with depression/ed/drug abuse, keep your head up, we can get through this
[Intro] What's up team!
/u/chickpeaceandlove [168cm | 58.5kg | 20.7 | -4kg | 23F]
Created: Tue Oct 18 10:12:45 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/584mzw/whats_up_team/
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Heyaaa
Today I finally decided to make another account to join the community! I've been on reddit for almost 5 years now, lurking here for a few months or so, decided to join the conversation as my binge/restriction cycles really have been going crazy this past year.
I have a fairly long history of disordered eating, never really got any help specifically for these habits though I've been to psychiatrists and prescribed antidepressants previously.
Anyway, just wanted to say hi and give a bit of an introduction! I'm aiming to be fairly active, largely because I don't have anyone in the real world that understands the whole thing, probably the same case as with everyone here.
*I was wondering if I should have put the stats in my flair in imperial units but I assume everyone here is the same as me and can convert in their head the more-or-less equivalent hahaa.*
[Discussion] Daily Food Diary! October 18, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Tue Oct 18 10:02:35 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/584ktk/daily_food_diary_october_18_2016/
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This is a daily food diary thread for October 18, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
[Rant/Rave] Day 2 of fasting is going so well I might extend it [rave]
/u/disbeetch [5'3'' | 140 | 23.7 | -34 | F]
Created: Tue Oct 18 09:45:02 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/584h8o/day_2_of_fasting_is_going_so_well_i_might_extend/
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I posted before about my pre-beach trip binge. I'm leaving Thursday and might try to not eat anything until I get to the beach! This is my first long fast and I'm so proud of myself for being in control- it feels like I can do anything!!!
[Other] Body check 10/18 121.lbs
/u/frailraven [5'10 | CW 117 | LW 115 | F20]
Created: Tue Oct 18 09:17:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/584bz8/body_check_1018_121lbs/
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http://i.imgur.com/E5jFdIN.jpg
[Discussion] I see discussion about thinspo music a lot, but anyone know songs about eating disorders that aren't thinspo? Here's my favorite.
/u/superfuckingsecret [5'10" | 113.8 | 16. 06| non-binary]
Created: Tue Oct 18 09:15:10 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/584bfp/i_see_discussion_about_thinspo_music_a_lot_but/
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"Cream of my compulsion rising to the tip of the spout
Screaming and convulsing, now I'm gonna spit it out
An amorphous monster makes his home inside my house
Even now, stretched out on the couch
Waiting for the midnight hour until he gets loud
Yes, my body is some prison--why else keep it filled with poison?
No reason to celebrate, forget the milkshakes, Mom--it will take
More than a spoonful of sugar for me to swallow my pride this time
I decide what goes inside
I decide what goes inside my body
One more time, I decide
I decide what goes inside
I decide what goes inside my body"
from My Eating Disorder by Titus Andronicus
Body check 10/18 121.6 lbs
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Oct 18 08:55:13 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5847i1/body_check_1018_1216_lbs/
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http://i.imgur.com/Mvck602.jpg
[Goal] I thought I'd feel different ...
/u/stellaclaire [5' 10" | CW:140 | 19.58 | -90 | F]
Created: Tue Oct 18 08:37:56 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58449w/i_thought_id_feel_different/
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I just bought my first size 0 outfit. It fits perfectly. I used to be too fat for the Walmart size 18. (yeah, I know vanity sizing, but Walmart vanity sizes like crazy too).
I ... thought I'd feel ... smaller.
[Goal] I'm almost halfway there.
/u/tinybites [5'6" | F | sw: 185 | cw: 153 | gw: 115]
Created: Tue Oct 18 08:12:50 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/583zkg/im_almost_halfway_there/
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[removed]
[Meme/Humor] Is Being a Skeleton For Halloween a Little Too on the Nose?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Oct 18 08:07:42 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/583yo4/is_being_a_skeleton_for_halloween_a_little_too_on/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] Is anyone else's whole day basically decided by breakfast time?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Oct 18 07:16:04 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/583pq1/is_anyone_elses_whole_day_basically_decided_by/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] [rant] my boyfriend noticed I stopped eating lol
/u/thinkthinlythrowaway
Created: Tue Oct 18 07:06:37 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/583o1h/rant_my_boyfriend_noticed_i_stopped_eating_lol/
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It's not really a lol moment but it is ironically funny. I used to wish for someone as caring as him and now I almost resent it.
I love him, I love that he cares and I don't ever want him to give up on me. I know you should want to get better for you but honestly I won't want to until I'm at a BMI of 16 and it's being dangerous for me. And that's a long way since I'm 5'0 so technically I'd still be healthy at 100 (which is where he thinks my goal is).
He asked me yesterday what was wrong with rice. I didn't even realize I'd stopped eating it but apparently the last 5 times we had rice I only got a plate of veggies. He had this sad smile when I said I didn't even notice.
I'm crazy. I'm wallowing in self pity. I'm stupid. I'm starving myself with no budge of the stupid scale although I'm pretty sure the batteries are dying and I want a new one anyways cause that one is like 10 years old.
😂😅 this is fine
[Rant/Rave] Freaking out overwater bloat
/u/melcatx
Created: Tue Oct 18 06:46:25 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/583kjn/freaking_out_overwater_bloat/
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I started really seriously restricting a week ago and put firm girls in place, and have worked out a lot more than usual. I want to be 113 lb by Halloween, and this is a VERY obtainable goal for me.
I started eating a lot of soup this weekend, since its low cal, completely forgetting sodium was a thing. Guys, I have never really had an issue with retaining water before, but omg. I stepped on the scale and was in actual SHOCK, I just want to cry thinking about it! Plus, I feel a bit bloated since I am getting my period tomorrow.
To top it all off, (tmi alert), I usually poop every single morning, and now I have been going like once every 3 days and its driving me insane. I need to get out of this slump, I feel bigger than I have felt in seriously a year!!!!
I am getting a diuretic later today and also taking an EC stack. Please keep me in your thoughts haha, I cannot handle this.
[Discussion] Self-care and Beauty Q+A October 18, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Tue Oct 18 06:02:52 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/583dqs/selfcare_and_beauty_qa_october_18_2016/
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Eating disorders are real, complex, and devastating conditions that can have serious consequences for physical health. Use this thread to discuss harm reduction and beauty tips, plus suggestions on how to build back up the physical self before and after engaging in disordered behaviors.
Please be wary of false advice and information. Be sure to research the facts before taking anyone's advice, no matter who they are. Remember that diagnosing members is unacceptable. **Anyone looking for medical guidance should seek the opinion of a medically licensed professional.**
*****
Self-care and beauty threads are posted every Tuesday.
Have any questions or concerns? Comment below, or [PM the mods.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FproED)
[Rant/Rave] sometimes I hate my ed so much :(
/u/feelingpeakyy [5'3 | 95lbs | 16.7 | F]
Created: Tue Oct 18 04:06:02 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/583004/sometimes_i_hate_my_ed_so_much/
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Mobile so cant flair...
On a school trip, im fasting and the entire bus bought kfc. I would give pretty much anything to be eating right now and I feel sad and hungry :(
Lowest weight since last hospitalization today. I hope ill feel better soon.
[Rant/Rave] I feel so uncomfortable in my own body
/u/lightfeathers [5'4" | CW 112 | GW 95 | F]
Created: Tue Oct 18 02:34:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/582qzo/i_feel_so_uncomfortable_in_my_own_body/
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I feel like I'm stuck in a fat suit and there's no way out.
[Rant/Rave] It's my birthday and because of that I'm miserable.
/u/shorty_pie [5'5.5" | 153.0 | 25.27 | -10| F]
Created: Tue Oct 18 01:45:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/582mc6/its_my_birthday_and_because_of_that_im_miserable/
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So it's my birthday today. Right now I'm trying to restrict to at least under 1000 a day, averaging about 650. I love my family and I'm so grateful for everything they do today, but the process of celebrating my birthday this year just makes me want to cry.
I'm being pressured to pick out a restaurant to go to dinner to this weekend, and I can't bring myself to choose anything. I thought that would be the only day that I had to worry, but just now I had a scary thought and ran down to check the freezer. Yup. They've bought a cake. Not just any cake, but I cake that I stupidly proclaimed was *my absolutely favourite* back when I was in a binging stage. A cake that's fucking *450 calories per slice*.
It's just past midnight, and I've felt horrible all day. I was looking forward to having a nice slice of toast for breakfast because I'm so fucking hungry. But now I have to save all my calories for dinner and still hope that I'll stay within my limit. I just want to cry and give up and die. My family is going to be laughing and wanting me to have a good time and giving me presents and I'll just be sitting there with a smile plastered on my face trying not to explode.
I just don't know what to do anymore.
[Other] HW to CW pics + small frustration rant
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Oct 18 01:32:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/582l21/hw_to_cw_pics_small_frustration_rant/
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[deleted]
[Help] I don't know where else to go (tw)
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Oct 18 01:07:00 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/582ift/i_dont_know_where_else_to_go_tw/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] I cook and clean and try to be perfect for my bf so he won't suspect anything
/u/overcastforever
Created: Tue Oct 18 00:53:12 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/582gw0/i_cook_and_clean_and_try_to_be_perfect_for_my_bf/
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My BF and I live together. Luckily I work from home and he goes into work. This gives me plenty of alone time to restrict and indulge in all of my weird eating habits.
I also cook up a storm, look up delicious recipes on pinterest, go out and buy ingredients and make a really nice dinner for him to come home to. I don't eat any of it and lie that I ate some before he came home. I busy myself cleaning the dishes and tidying up so he can't question further. Basically I feel like I lie so much about my real eating habits. I try to look like a huge foodie to others and be really into cooking even though I don't eat much at all... sigh.
If he found out, I don't know how I could deal. He is the type to get super concerned and then become fixated on making sure I'm not starving myself. Anyways, since no one knows about my ED, I thought I could share here.
[Help] Going to join a gym so I can run - does anyone lift?
/u/onlyroom_forthin [5'6 | CW:149.6 | 24.24 | SW:165 | UGW:120 | F]
Created: Tue Oct 18 00:06:11 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/582boc/going_to_join_a_gym_so_i_can_run_does_anyone_lift/
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I live in a really unsafe neighborhood, and I feel like I could really ramp up my weight loss if I could run again, but I'm too afraid to go outside (bad traffic, occasional gunshots, don't want to get mugged). So I decided I'd really like to join a gym and at least run a few miles on a track/treadmill, but I want to do everything I can to lose.
Do you guys lift at all? Or do bodyweight? I don't want to bulk up at ALL, I just want to look lean and toned. I feel like I can't ask on /r/fitness or similar because they scoff at anyone who uses the word tone :(
Also...any opinions at eating back exercise calories? I used to all the time, but I feel like it made me feel justified in eating more because I exercised. So now I don't, but on low calorie days I either don't have the energy to work out, or I feel ravenous after.
Thank you friends!
[Discussion] UGW rewards?
/u/RetailSlaveNo1 [5'2 | CW 164.8 | GW 95 | 31.22]
Created: Mon Oct 17 22:44:55 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5821cr/ugw_rewards/
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Reaching my UGW is a huge reward in itself but I'm going on a road trip if I reach it by summer, as a reward. Do you guys have one?
Also, sorry if I post here I a lot. You guys are just so amazing and it's nice to talk about it for once! 💖💕
[Rant/Rave] Fasting was easier when I was younger
/u/Wildrumpus273172
Created: Mon Oct 17 22:12:23 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/581wt6/fasting_was_easier_when_i_was_younger/
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I still love the feeling of it but I'm 24 now and it was soooo much easier physically when I was like 20, and when I was a teenager.
But I completed my 24 hour fast, and just had a piece of toast. I might start another 24 hour fast tomorrow but it'll depend on what the scale says tomorrow.
[Rant/Rave] I always fucking binge right before I sleep
/u/imperfectcontrol [5'6" | CW: 115 | 18.56 | CGW: 100 | F]
Created: Mon Oct 17 21:46:35 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/581szr/i_always_fucking_binge_right_before_i_sleep/
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On mobile so can't flair, sorry.
I hate that literally an hour before bed I'll binge and ruin an entire perfect day. I don't know why I always give in, always, nearly without fail, I end up eating. Just once, I want to be able to sleep on an empty stomach.
[Rant/Rave] going home to see family...
/u/hopelessly--hopeful [5'4" | puts whales to shame| -20 | F| 22]
Created: Mon Oct 17 21:22:02 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/581paa/going_home_to_see_family/
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[removed]
[Rant/Rave] People starting to ask questions
/u/erilaz- [5'7 | CW: 185 | GW: 110 | -45lbs | F]
Created: Mon Oct 17 20:17:30 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/581es6/people_starting_to_ask_questions/
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On mobile so I can't flair D:
But I'm very upset right now. I've been restricting for a while now(since May) I'm seven ish pounds away from getting into my high school jeans. Everything should be awesome.
I'm doing so well and was even fasting a couple of days. But today my dad asked me what I had eaten/what I planned to eat today. And I lied and said I'd get lunch at work, but he commented how my soup for dinner is low cal and I needed to bring snacks to work. He even packed them for me :(
I'm overweight, I thought the questions and concern would be way down the line. It won't be hard to lie as I am at work a lot. But it's just frustrating that I have to be more careful around my family.
And I have off tomorrow and have to find something to do so I'm not home with my dad ughhhhhh
[Rant/Rave] I'm restarting... again ( another one of my dumb rants)
/u/radioactiveicedtea [5'3.75"|CW104|18.38|-34|F]
Created: Mon Oct 17 20:10:38 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/581dmm/im_restarting_again_another_one_of_my_dumb_rants/
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I have lost count how many times I have told myself that I'll get my shit together. This is fricken ridiculous!!! I just want to gain some control and stop giving in to every single damn temptation. I am on mobile now so I am not sure what my flair is but I am 102 pounds at the moment. I just want to get below 100 (like 97 pounds or so) and maintain, but I've been stuck at this weight forever! I hate it so much and I'm terrified I'll get fat :c I should probably start posting here more often, as opposed to ranting on here every now and then. Ugh why am I so weak??? I eat food when I am not even hungry and 90% of the time its not even good food so like wtfff???? Ok rant over
[Rant/Rave] When its payday and your family wants to go out to eat
/u/K_iwi
Created: Mon Oct 17 20:05:19 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/581cpj/when_its_payday_and_your_family_wants_to_go_out/
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And then they ask where you want to eat :)
and you don't know a place :)
But they make you pick :)))
And you say barbecue :))
*and they butter the buns for some reason* :)))
And you don't eat it all and they rag on you :)
and its not even the place you *wanted* so you wasted *everything* for *nothing*
And you want to purge :)
But you spend the next 4 hours walking around :))))
I :) love :) paydays :))))
[Rant/Rave] Everything is crap
/u/Bad_idea_babe [5'7"| 189.8| 29.7| -14|F]
Created: Mon Oct 17 19:44:38 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58193x/everything_is_crap/
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This doesn't really have anything to do with eating but it kind of ties into the whole I hate myself thing. I got eyelash extensions tonight and they look awful. Completely horrible. I don't even want to go anywhere. I had to go to Target right after I got them done and I was almost in tears the entire time because I didn't want anyone to see me. I just wanted to look pretty and nice for my husband's birthday and the family photos we have. But I can't even do that I feel like I'm this horrible fat ugly troll who should just go live under a bridge
http://imgur.com/a/2HJZH
This looks bad right? I'm worried that since I suck at everything I'm just overreacting.
*Edit* 5 have fallen out already. They're in a tiny pile on my makeup kit. I haven't binged though, which is huge. Usually any negative emotion ends in one.
[Rant/Rave] When the pain of binging prevents you from falling asleep
/u/fckk [5'4| CW 120lbs | 20.60 | GW 115 | F]
Created: Mon Oct 17 19:06:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5812ju/when_the_pain_of_binging_prevents_you_from/
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I'm so lethargic from binging. But the food-up-to-my-throat, heartburn, acid reflux has me so physically uncomfortable that I can't lay in any way that comforts me enough to drift off. I also can't spend this awake time productively because my stomach is throbbing and face feels hot from the binge. I can't do anything but be uncomfortable.
It's like being trapped halfway between sleep and awake discomfort. It is hell.
I have to remember this feeling. I always say that. Tomorrow is a new day.
[Rant/Rave] I just need to know it's ok [rant]
/u/yikes_dot_com [5'6 | 111 | 17.9 | F]
Created: Mon Oct 17 18:55:13 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5810kq/i_just_need_to_know_its_ok_rant/
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my college has this entire week off so on friday I took a train to the town where my best friend from home goes to school and I'm staying with him until tomorrow morning. in that time I've eaten probably more food than I have in the past month combined. I feel horrible, out-of-control, this bingeing has depleted me of money and sanity and any sort of self-esteem. I found a scale in his bathroom this morning and weighed myself at 125.4 pounds (that was with shoes on so I *know* that that+water weight means it's not accurate but still) and I feel so disgusting and bloated, the bloating actually woke me up in the middle of the night last night, I have a distended abdomen like some sort of monster and was gonna skip dinner tonight but fucking caved. this is just so awful and I was doing so well--I was miserable, weak, lonely, isolated, depressed, a shadow of my former self, but I was 114 pounds and losing.
tomorrow I'm going back to my parents' house for the rest of the week and I know I'm not gonna regain any sort of control while I'm there especially because I sent them pictures from this weekend and they both commented on how thin I am so I think they're starting to get worried. my mom told me she would take me to whole foods tomorrow and get me anything I wanted, I think she's really concerned, my parents are so loving and don't deserve a fuckup eating disordered child like me, I don't even know where this is going I just feel so awful and bloated like a balloon and absolutely and completely disgusted with myself for falling so far off track and idk could just use some support I guess
[Rant/Rave] Why am I like this..
/u/NaejNire [5'9'' | 146 | 21.17 | -16]
Created: Mon Oct 17 18:45:27 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/580yvx/why_am_i_like_this/
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I restrict during the day, but have awful late night binges. So I tried to eat more calories during the day, and I STILL binge around this hour. Why can't I stop doing this to myself?
[Rant/Rave] I want to be a machine.
/u/TinyTinyCleverCDR [156 cm | 50.8 kg | 21.73 | -7.7 kg | F]
Created: Mon Oct 17 18:40:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/580xxq/i_want_to_be_a_machine/
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Unfeeling. Sleek. Using exactly the resources I need and no more; input and output mapped out precisely, with no room for question. I'm sick of blood and emotions and flesh. I want to stop feeling.
Sometimes it happens out of nowhere. I'll enter a random daze, and suddenly nothing really matters-- I exist in a vacuum, completely separated from everyone else in the world. I float by with only the sensation of the rain reminding me that any of this is real. But if there's nothing to tether me in place, I just close my eyes and... disappear. No thoughts. No feelings. Down for maintenance.
I can't quite do it on command, but running almost does the trick. Once the rhythm gets going, there's nothing left inside. I'm just two feet hitting the pavement and nothing else. I wish I never had to stop, that I could just run and run until everything inside me burns out and my body breaks down forever.
[Help] Need advice!
/u/throwaway37493
Created: Mon Oct 17 18:30:10 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/580w9x/need_advice/
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Okay so tomorrow im going to a concert and I'm wearing a pretty tight top so I don't want to eat tomorrow before I go. But we're drinking before the concert. I don't drink much so I feel like it's a really bad idea for me to drink on an empty stomach, but I don't want to eat and get bloated. What should I do???
On mobile can't flair sorry!
[Rant/Rave] I'm so angry!
/u/dudeswallow
Created: Mon Oct 17 18:21:27 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/580uso/im_so_angry/
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I get weak. Eat. Still weak! And full! And the healthier the food the worse it is! C'mon!
[Rant/Rave] I hate my body so much that I don't even feel like a real human being, just a disgusting, misshapen mistake
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Oct 17 17:43:41 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/580od3/i_hate_my_body_so_much_that_i_dont_even_feel_like/
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[deleted]
[Discussion] "You burn more calories when you're cold" - Thoughts? Discussion? Facts?
/u/smokesanddietcokes [Adipose Industries]
Created: Mon Oct 17 16:10:18 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58072z/you_burn_more_calories_when_youre_cold_thoughts/
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Okay, so I've been doing a bit of reading on this, mostly to see if there are any plus sides to the UK getting SO FREAKING COLD RIGHT NAO OMG.
I am not the worlds best learner. Here is what I *think* I've learned, very vaguely. I would like to see what peoples thoughts are, and whether anyone knows more on the subject/sciencey stuff/better explanations or corrections:
* There seems to be a difference between being cold 'inside' the body, and being cold 'outside' the body. Being cold 'on the inside' (feeling cold easily even in warmer weathers, feeling deep down cold rather than on your skin) means your metabolism is slightly sluggish (and therefore you are burning fewer calories). *However*, feeling cold because of being in a *cold environment*, feeling the cold on your skin because it is genuinely cold outside, is different - your body will actually burn *marginally* more calories in an attempt to warm you up.
* Shivering burns quite a lot of calories compared to just 'being cold'(but is also unpleasant). However, you would burn more calories exercising in that cold weather to warm up, rather than staying still and letting yourself shiver (and tbh that's more pleasant!). You burn more calories exercising in cold temperatures vs mild temperatures. There are benefits to not wrapping up to much to go for a winter run, for instance!
* And the most interesting to me - Being in a cold environment encourages 'white fat' to turn into 'brown fat', which is a healthy fat. It is also metabolically active, meaning it contributes more to calorie burn, and specifically the burning of (white) fat stores. It's function is (apparently) mainly to warm the body.
So to me, it's sounding like there is at least some benefit to me freezing my fucking butt off right now - considering I can't control the fact that I am anyway! The heating is too expensive to have on all night *~cries~*.
Anyone know more on this subject? Anything more specific or interesting? Factoids? Especially more on the brown fat thing!
[Meme/Humor] Me, waking up this morning after a three day binge 😭
/u/morose_adipose [5'2 | 90 lbs | 17.05 | F]
Created: Mon Oct 17 16:09:28 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5806xh/me_waking_up_this_morning_after_a_three_day_binge/
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https://i.redd.it/kr8lec3sy3sx.jpg
[Thinspo] Thinspo pics are great, but does anyone have any thinspo music??
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Oct 17 15:40:42 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/58016q/thinspo_pics_are_great_but_does_anyone_have_any/
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[deleted]
[Goal] Body check 10/17 123 lbs
/u/frailraven [5'10 | CW 117 | LW 115 | F20]
Created: Mon Oct 17 15:39:27 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5800y3/body_check_1017_123_lbs/
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http://i.imgur.com/hKdiCA8.jpg
[Discussion] Does anybody else use their ED as a control mechanism?
/u/tallskinnywannabe8
Created: Mon Oct 17 15:15:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57zwc9/does_anybody_else_use_their_ed_as_a_control/
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I feel like I don't always have control of the people and events around me but my body and the food I eat are the one thing I can control. I know I'm definitely a control freak so it would make sense.
[Help] I'm not normal and I don't know why
/u/little-paws
Created: Mon Oct 17 15:04:12 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57zu0t/im_not_normal_and_i_dont_know_why/
---
I'm feeling so awful. I went to the store and I bought a giant bag of doritos, a pack of cookies and a pack of marshmallows and I've just eaten them all.
God I can't stand myself, why do I do this? I just want to be thin and pretty and be able to be like normal people.
I'm cooking broccoli soup which is all that I will eat tomorrow and I will go to the gym twice. Fine, but it won't make me normal.
Just needing some support or something, I don't know.
[Rant/Rave] jeeeeeeeeez
/u/ikillsouls [5' 2" | 106 | 19.4 | Ugw: 85 |19f]
Created: Mon Oct 17 14:36:10 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57zoef/jeeeeeeeeez/
---
Im typing this post because I need to make some sort of noise, ya dont even have to read it honestly. This boy asked me if he could join me to study and i said yes, unfortunately we are in the "quiet" level of the library. I have not eaten all day and i am trying my hardest to suppress my ugly stomach noises. I am pressing the keys ver hard. Typing at just the right moments when I feel my stomach is about to make a sound. help.
edit. He left, i feel partially responsible for not talking to him all that much :(
[Rant/Rave] Rant/help me: Overwhelmed grocery shopping
/u/iuile
Created: Mon Oct 17 14:35:07 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57zo74/ranthelp_me_overwhelmed_grocery_shopping/
---
On mobile; can't flair. I order my groceries to be delivered, and every week it's an ordeal, adding stuff to the order, then removing it, trying to be healthy, trying to be low cal or low carb. Anyone have healthful ideas? I have spinach, avocados, and salmon so far that I feel okay about. I just want to eat perfectly, and when that turns out to be impossible, I just don't eat or I eat junk. I'm joining a gym soon, so I'll probably quit keto and eat carbs for energy, but they all just seem so high cal for no nutrition.
[Rant/Rave] I hate my boyfriend
/u/cry1000x [5'4" | 148.2 lbs | 25.4 | F]
Created: Mon Oct 17 13:24:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57z9or/i_hate_my_boyfriend/
---
* 3 months into relationship: "Boobs like yours don't look good without a bra on. Put a bra on."
* 8 months into relationship (I was a virgin prior to meeting him): "I need to have a threesome." "I need to sleep with other people" Literally killed teenage virgin me's ego as I gave him sex *whenever* he wanted it even if it was painful. He made me act out threesome scenarios with people we knew IRL but we never actually did it thank Jesus. It would have actually destroyed me.
* 2 years into relationship (both of our weights have fluctuated by 20 lbs[me] 30 lbs[him]): "You need to come to the gym with me more. I expect you to be as skinny as other girls in *name of our city*"
* 3 years into relationship (I have developed hormonal acne entering my early 20's): "Your acne looks like a disease on your face. Try sauna-ing everyday. It will go away."
I've had multiple plastic surgery procedures, on my breasts and face, am a gym-obsessed, restrict, and spend a good amount of my monthly budget on acne medication. Around last year I made multiple photo albums of all my nudes. Like really creative, artistic, well-lit/filtered nudes. I named the albums cute names like "Spank Bank" I would send him nudes basically whenever I showered or was just getting home from the gym. I finally had a body he approved of.
I've been working so much lately but he still gets sex once a day minimum even if it's painful. Even if I'm exhausted. He gives me an orgasm once a month if I'm *lucky.*
Last night I came home and saw a fresh container of lube next to his computer. My heart sank.
Ya, porn is "normal" right? Given our extensive history of him criticizing my body and comparing me to other women when he had **full knowledge** I've had eating disorders since before puberty, I just can't accept him watching porn. I give him everything and he still wants to touch his junk to other women.
I get full Brazillian waxes for him every 4 weeks. Not enough. I spend up to 2 hours on hair + makeup. Not enough. I starve most day of the week. Not enough. I wear very revealing and fitted clothing around him. Not enough.
I self-harmed for the first time every this morning. We were up since 5 arguing. I have a huge lump on my head from hitting myself with the remote so hard. Today is off to an awful start. I'm about to go take it out at the gym.
[Rant/Rave] I've been doing pretty well aside from a weekend slip-up
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Oct 17 12:48:31 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57z27a/ive_been_doing_pretty_well_aside_from_a_weekend/
---
[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] There's no place else for me to share this.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Oct 17 12:43:36 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57z171/theres_no_place_else_for_me_to_share_this/
---
[deleted]
[Thinspo] sooyoung
/u/wearebulletproof [5'4 | fat | 20F🎀✨]
Created: Mon Oct 17 12:35:20 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57yzhl/sooyoung/
---
http://imgur.com/a/dA1b4
[Tip] After a year of loosing control on restricting+exercise, i finally got off my lazy ass and did something about it. Best decision ever, 10/10 would completely recommend
/u/runningboyruns [5'9 | 130lbs | BMI: 19.2 | WEIGHT LOST: unmeasured | FtM (pre T)]
Created: Mon Oct 17 12:21:03 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57ywju/after_a_year_of_loosing_control_on/
---
Long time lurker; first time poster. I'm going to skip a personal introduction.
I've struggled with EDs ever since i hit puberty. About a year ago i "recovered" (ie. stopped counting calories/stopped over-exercising). Since then, I've gained probably 5-10 lbs. (i don't have a scale so i can't be 100% sure) and the whole time the weight gain was happening, i never stopped beating myself up over it. I became so unmotivated that i pretty much just laid in bed all day, only getting up to grab a snack or watch my little brother. As many of you already know, laying in bed and snacking all day is practically guaranteed to make you feel lethargic.
Well, today i restricted all morning, got off my lazy self-hating ass, put on my workout clothes, hopped on a bike, and rode for 4 straight miles. It was the *BEST FEELING EVER*. The runner's high is insane; i hardly feel sore, i'm not hungry... hell, i'm not even thirsty! I'm still feeling it almost an hour after i hopped off my bike. I feel as though the fat is melting off of me (which i know is stupid but that's really what it feels like and it's *so motivating*). I cannot stress just how beneficial this feeling is.
So pretty much; if you're feeling unmotivated, lazy, lethargic, ect., get off your lazy ass and get your heart rate up. Do something that'll make your muscles sore :-)
[Goal] Body check 10/17 123lbs
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Oct 17 12:02:47 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57yssy/body_check_1017_123lbs/
---
http://i.imgur.com/o78OUMu.jpg
[Discussion] bouillon recipes?!
/u/melcatx
Created: Mon Oct 17 11:58:48 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57yrxu/bouillon_recipes/
---
Hey friends. I am going to buy some bouillon today and I was wondering how do you all prepare it? I was thinking of adding some cooked carrots. How do you like it prepared?!
[Meme/Humor] ClickHole gave me a hearty chuckle this morning
/u/Eyes_Couldnt_Lie
Created: Mon Oct 17 11:28:31 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57ylle/clickhole_gave_me_a_hearty_chuckle_this_morning/
---
http://www.clickhole.com/blogpost/when-i-stopped-hating-my-body-i-could-finally-see--3096
[PSA] Reminders: This is not a diet/motivation sub. Please read all side bar rules before posting.
/u/somanyjellyrolls [5'5" | massive | F]
Created: Mon Oct 17 11:17:27 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57yj8j/psa_reminders_this_is_not_a_dietmotivation_sub/
---
As we grow and gain new members, this is something that needs to be periodically discussed.
Eating disorders are sadly misunderstood in our society. Media often portrays them as the young teenage girl that wants the perfect magazine cover body, so she skips lunch or purges it in the school bathroom, continuing happily with her day. But the reality is far more complex, oftentimes dark, and serious than that image allows.
Eating disorders ARE mental illnesses, plain and simple, and they can affect all ages and genders. If you haven't already, please take a moment to check out the [proED wiki](https://www.reddit.com/r/proED/wiki/faq) and familiarize yourself with the different types of eating disorders.
We understand that some of you here may not identify as having an ED in any of it's various forms, and that's okay. We invite you to read and gain some understanding of what it's like to exist with this mental illness. We welcome you to be supportive, and we expect you to respect our rules. What we do not welcome, however, is treating this sub as a dieting and weightloss sub. We are not a source of inspiration. We are not a "get thin quick" route to your dream body. **If you read even a few of the posts here, you will see that eating disorders are often not about weight at all, but about control, self-worth, compulsion, or any other number of factors.**
There are many subs out there that can help non-disordered people make healthy choices and plans to meet their weight loss goals (and if our minds were healthy, we would be there too!). Please check the side bar for links to those subreddits. Remember, THIS IS NOT ONE OF THEM! **Asking for dieting tips or asking how to become disordered is not allowed, and will result in the removal of your posts and comments.**
For those of you here who DO have an ED, please also familiarize yourself with the subreddit [rules](https://www.reddit.com/r/proED/wiki/rules). Commenting on other members' weights, food, or health will result in a warning or ban. We are here to support each other, not to tear each other down or compete in any way. It may be frustrating to see users who do not understand the serious nature of EDs, but asserting that anyone is not "severe" enough or suffering enough is NOT okay either. As always, please report any posts that make you feel uncomfortable.
Again, we welcome your presence among us, disordered or not. Your awareness helps to destigmatize our illness and that's a powerful thing! But please don't fall prey to the simplified and often glamorized media portrayal of eating disorders. This is not something anyone should strive for, not something anyone should want. It is painful, both physically and mentally. It is lonely and isolating. It makes you feel powerless. We can not help you achieve what you think is perfection, because for us, nothing will EVER be perfect.
**TL;DR: This is not a diet/motivation sub. No one but your doctor can tell you if you have an eating disorder or not. If you do not experience disordered eating, and you are here to lose weight fast, this is not the sub for you.**
[Discussion] Progress pics from "anorexic to healthy weight".
/u/gastastic [5'1 | 118.4 | 26F]
Created: Mon Oct 17 11:12:15 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57yi2o/progress_pics_from_anorexic_to_healthy_weight/
---
Confession time. Any time I see these posts, I wind up loving their before photos. On more than one occasion, taking screenshots as inspo. 😕
[Discussion] Back to Day 1 on bingeing, Day 2 on alcohol
/u/ppyeoreul-mudgosipeo [5'6 | 2 Days w/o Binge | BMI 26.9 | F]
Created: Mon Oct 17 10:04:03 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57y3t3/back_to_day_1_on_bingeing_day_2_on_alcohol/
---
But! This is a reminder to myself and to anyone else struggling with food binges *and* alcohol binges-- it's hard. Of course it's hard. *Everything worth doing is hard.* But time inches inexorably forward, and with each hour that passes with no alcohol and no uncontrollable face-stuffing, we have succeeded. Small successes will add up to bigger ones.
[Discussion] Daily Food Diary! October 17, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Mon Oct 17 10:03:10 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57y3m3/daily_food_diary_october_17_2016/
---
This is a daily food diary thread for October 17, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
[Rant/Rave] I hate myself no matter what.
/u/life-as-a-loon [5'3"|104|18.9|F]
Created: Mon Oct 17 09:52:37 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57y1gv/i_hate_myself_no_matter_what/
---
edit: I am a daily visitor and semi-regular poster to this sub for some time now. I decided to finally make an account for this sub to separate it from my regular account.
Last week I decided to take care of myself. To eat twice a day. To have cheese with my wine. To eat things that taste good. To only weigh myself every couple days. I told myself that restricting is only adding unnecessary stress to my life. My hair was/is thinning and falling out. My ex-but-not-really-boyfriend kept making me get on the scale and trying to feed me if I was under 100 lbs. So humiliating.
Fuck it. Let's put this dark part of my life behind me and be "normal." What is normal? I tried to enjoy food. It tasted good. But not really. My heart was beating so fast and I kept chugging water after every meal and taking laxatives because I felt so disgusting. I usually only take laxatives once in a while when I'm restricting and can't go. Going to the bathroom regularly felt gross. I don't like having all of that matter inside of me. I feel gross. I gained 2.5 lbs over the last week.
When I looked in the mirror during that week, I could tell that I looked healthier in the face. I didn't look like I was dying. But I hated the way I looked. My clothes were a little tighter because of all the carbs I ate. Because of the creamer I put in my coffee. Fuck you, French Vanilla. I felt hungry between meals because my stomach was filling up and emptying out. Disgusting. I am a pig.
So here I am, sitting at work drinking black coffee and water. It feels great to not eat. I won't waste my money making myself look uglier than I already do. I have more energy. I won't crash after stuffing my face with carbs and fat. I know that no matter how much weight I lose I will hate myself more and more. I won't eat because I hate myself, which makes my hate myself more. I also realize that I will hate myself when I eat, too. I think I hate myself more when I eat, though. Fuck it, I hate myself no matter what.
[Intro] Not sexually attractive to my husband
/u/procoyo [5'6" | 190lb | GW:140lb | -5lb | F]
Created: Mon Oct 17 09:27:49 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57xwnh/not_sexually_attractive_to_my_husband/
---
I'm fat. I'm just going to get this out there right away. I'm not anywhere near being gloriously thin, though I once was close. I was 140lbs in college, and at 5' 6" that was the thinnest I'd ever been. That was five years ago. I used to take pictures of myself all the time. I found all these photos in my email from 2011, where I was just in underwear. I was so close to my goal, but I don't know what happened. I guess life got in the way. Maybe I overcame my ED somehow. I don't know.
Well, five years changes a person. And so do anxiety and depression meds. Maybe even my IUD. I've been struggling with depression for years now, and I keep moving and switching doctors, and the doctors always shake my med regiment up. I was steady at 160lbs for a while, after taking up an extensive exercise routine and halving my meals. But in this past year, something changed. I blew up to 195lbs. I didn't think there was a problem, until my sex life changed. My husband became more and more distant sexually, rejecting my advances and never initiating.
During an argument, he finally told me that he refused to have sex with me because my stomach stuck out past my breasts. He told me, "I don't find you sexually attractive anymore. I like petite girls. I always have." He also revealed that he was masturbating to a photo of me from 2011, the year I was my thinnest.
As you can imagine, there's so much that came back. It was like I had recovered from my ED only to have it all open back up, wider than before. It's happening right now. I went back through my email and found all those photos, where my stomach was so flat, when I fit into those tiny, sexy jeans I gave away years ago. I can't even look at myself in the mirror. I'm filled with self loathing. I wear baggy shirts to hide my body, which I'm discussing with my therapist, but I've only been going to her for 4 weeks now so we haven't really touched on much except that yeah, I feel this way, and it sucks.
I signed up for exercise classes, which is what I did in college. I was weight training and kickboxing every day, back then. I think if I can get back to something similar, I can find that happiness again. I think I can love my body again, and not be literally ashamed to look in the mirror. I feel like covering up the bottom half, and honestly might do that. I want to take pictures and be proud of myself.
I don't know what the point of this post was. I guess I just didn't see anything similar, and I was hoping I could find some kindred spirits, or at least some support. Thanks for your time reading this.
*****
Edit:
Sorry, this gets long. Short story: He's cheated on me before and now secretly (so he thinks) seeking divorce advice.
I just realized I never mentioned, he's military. And he completely changed attitudes after boot camp.
He's lying behind my back right now. Someone mentioned cheating, which very well be another thing he's capable of. He's done it before. We were polyamorous for a few months and we had a mutual girlfriend. I wasn't really into it, I wasn't really interested, and only did it because he was so eager to do it despite the fact that I thought I was giving him everything at home. We were about 1,000 miles apart at the time for his schooling, and I was a very giving wife. Very giving. He promised me it was just going to be casual sex, that she would never be elevated to my level as a wife. But then he did that. We had a fight, they had a fight, and she broke up with him (she was also long distance). It's a long story what happened next, but he did chase her another 1000 miles. Since he made me feel like I had been the cause of the break up, I offered to drive 22 hours as penitence, without help and without sleep. His attempt didn't work and only led to me feeling worse about everything.
I was about 160lbs at the time, which I was comfortable with... but she was tall and thin. She was his favorite word: petite. Over 6', thigh gap, bikini bridge, an ex-model... I was nothing in comparison to her. I still feel worthless in comparison.
Well, he began to realize how manipulative she had always been, yet still blamed me for the break up (when it was his controlling behavior that made her leave in the first place). He swore he never wanted anything to do with her ever again, that he was done. And I was relieved. He assured me the relationship was over and he wanted nothing to do with her.
Until she showed up on our doorstep several months later. She had left a bunch of stuff with us, and she didn't give us any warning. They went out to the garage to get her things and talk. And it took a very long time. I would go out from time to time, to see the door was down. When I would knock, he would lift it about a foot and talk to me through the gap. I did this maybe four times. He assured me they were just coming to peace with their relationship and finding closure.
Days later, she texts me and tells me they had sex in the garage. This she did while she was married (yeah, that happened FAST) to a guy who was NOT into polyamory and did not like my husband at all. He felt cheated on. And so did I. When I addressed him about it, he said he didn't realize polyamory was off the table anymore. He couldn't understand how or why I was upset, or why his solemn vow to be done with her was so important to me. And although he has since apologized, claiming he didn't realize he was hurting me by doing that, I still feel cheated on. Another thing my therapist agrees with me on.
Well. Now we cut to today. I've been getting neglected by him for about a year now. I can count on one hand the times we've had sex since he said those hurtful words, and it was just sex. Not love making. Just him going until he was satisfied. I've been sending him e-mails, as he's on a boat and we can't call each other. I began to address these issues with him, along with some others. He ignored every single instance in my emails wherein I brought up a concern. In my last email to him, I finally added an 8-point bullet list of concerns I wanted him to address. That was two days ago. I haven't heard anything back from him.
Except... that I have access to his personal email accounts. Not the one on the ship, though. And I have them because he gets bills sent to them, so I have to check to make sure we're on top of the payments. I guess he forgot that, because he made a throwaway account here on Reddit in a sub for a mental health disorder that doesn't apply to me. He claims I've got this specific issue, but my therapist has refuted that extensively. But anyway, he went to a specialized subreddit for it... and he wrote a title asking for advice on getting a divorce in the military.
All this because I was furious that he wouldn't address my concerns in an email. He went so far as to say that he should have left me a year into our relationship, but he was "young and dumb." He told them he doesn't know why I'm mad at him. What's even worse is that there was a domestic incident of violence, which he admitted to only his best friend, but had assured me long ago that said friend would never tell even under oath because "blue protects blue." He's telling these people in this forum that I'm making an "accusation," as though it never happened, and it's so upsetting how he could lie about that.
He said to these strangers he wants me out of his life and he doesn't want to support me anymore. Meanwhile, I fit NONE of the symptoms for the mental health disorder he claims I have. And like I said, my therapist says I do not have it.
What's even worse is how these people, these strangers, are replying all these horrific things to him. How I'm going to try to fuck one of his friends, how he deserves better and should kick me aside to find someone else, or cut me off financially and change all the passwords. If I don't have the passwords, I can't pay the bills. But it's not fair! I'm not that person, I am not that disorder! These people don't know me and they don't know the full story, and it tears me apart that he would do this to me.
My only friend here in this duty station is another military wife, whose husband is also on the same ship. While I was numb this morning and explaining everything with disbelief, she informed me that her husband was unhappy with him for his behavior. Those two and a third guy went to a bar, and my friend's husband eventually left because he claimed he couldn't stand to watch the other two drooling over the girls there.
I just don't know what to believe now. I certainly didn't believe he was capable of this... I'm so shocked.
I am going to pretend I don't know anything about his throwaway account. This way, I can at least know what to expect from him. He hasn't replied to anyone in the thread yet. I don't know what he's planning. I don't even know where to begin. I'm unemployed, I've been a stay at home wife for over a year now, and we have never had a savings thanks to him and his spending. I have exactly $110 hidden away, but that won't do shit for me.
So yeah. My friend took me out for coffee this morning, because even though I was numb and not feeling any emotions, my body was shaking badly. And that's all I plan to have today. Water and tea the rest of the day. I can't stomach anything else.
And you know... I had lost 4.5lbs since my first weigh in two days ago. I was so proud. Now I feel nothing. What's the fucking use.
All I can think back to now is when my shitty cheating mother divorced my poor giving father. He just meekly said to me, "I didn't think I was that bad. Was I?"
[Discussion] Is anyone else here a fan of Hamilton?
/u/FakingReallyWell [5'5.5" | 134 lbs | 22.1 | -22 lbs | F]
Created: Mon Oct 17 08:27:31 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57xlab/is_anyone_else_here_a_fan_of_hamilton/
---
I've been binging so much I haven't lost any weight for a month, and I'm getting really impatient with myself and annoyed that I can't lose weight faster.
The [lyrics from 'Wait for it' ](http://genius.com/Lin-manuel-miranda-wait-for-it-lyrics) from Hamilton are so good, and listening to this song really makes me feel better. Especially the line "I am the one thing in life I can control". It reminds me that I am the one that decides what I eat and what I don't eat and I can control my binges. Also, it's just an amazing song :)
Anyone else have any non-ED related songs that help them relax and feel better?
[Rant/Rave] Travel tips?
/u/Annabelise
Created: Mon Oct 17 08:18:56 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57xjpt/travel_tips/
---
Hi y'all. Ive made a few posts/comments on here before under my main account, but now a friend knows about that account and it has to be scrubbed (sigh).
Anyways, I need some advice about sticking to your goals while travelling!
First though, a rant: (feel free to rant about your own stuff in the comments as well)
I just spent four days up in the Himalayas hiking and partying, and sticking to my calorie limits (so I thought). The last day, after a two hour exhausting hike we sit down at a restaurant. Both the guys I'm with order pasta and pizza and milkshakes and all that shit, but I get a falafel, and only eat about 75%. My friend (the one that knows about my main account) announces he's done with his pizza and offers it to the table. Feeling good about the past few days, I pick a tiny bit of cheese off the pizza and eat it.
"Moment on the lips, lifetime on the hips" is what pizza-friend then says to me, with a chuckle. I make a joke back and then drink some water and the topic changes.
Obviously I then excuse myself and go throw everything up in the squat toilet aways off. Idiot has no idea what that saying even means, says "I just heard it somewhere, thought it was funny"
Fuck me man. I ended up weighing only a pound less than when I started the trip, which isn't terrible but I thought I was getting way more exercise than I actually was I guess.
SO, I'm going to Europe tomorrow for two weeks with the intention of stopping through Amsterdam first. Because of this fact especially, I need a plan. How do I not binge while partying in Europe? I dont want to have to purge on vacation, there's very little chance of getting away with it and I don't want to bring all my purging supplies (mouthwash etc)
I'm going mainly through Germany and Italy and I know all I'll want is food food FOOD and it's going to be straight restaurants for the next 14 days!
Help???
[Other] It's so obvious that Random Redditors come here and just downvote everything.
/u/High_as_red [5'4 | F]
Created: Mon Oct 17 08:14:50 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57xiyt/its_so_obvious_that_random_redditors_come_here/
---
You do not gave to hate something just because you do not understand it.
[Other] MFP friends?
/u/citrus_cunt [5' 9"| 139lbs | 19.5| +2lbs | F]
Created: Mon Oct 17 07:39:50 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57xcyv/mfp_friends/
---
I've finally learned the hard way that I need to be held accountable, and the best way to do that is to have other people to work with. So I'd really love to be anyone's friend on MFP. I gained 15lbs and could use all the encouragement and friendly competition I can get.
My username is sour_clam with a picture of jasper from Steven Universe flexing.
Please be my friend!! :)
[Discussion] Anyone else have trouble sleeping on an empty stomach?
/u/depressionbunny [5'6" | 138 | 22.6 | -12 | FM]
Created: Mon Oct 17 07:30:22 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57xbf6/anyone_else_have_trouble_sleeping_on_an_empty/
---
My body will NOT allow me to snooze unless I eat something. Even Benadryl and other sleep aids are worthless without something substantial to digest. I say substantial because I've tried tricking my body with broth and a bunch of water, but it fucking *knows*.
Anyway, now I just budget some of my calories to be consumed as a midnight snack, usually cookie dough protein bars and a glass of diluted milk- admittedly that sounds awful, but hey, so is everything else about EDs. Haha
[Tip] Fasting Physiology - Part II (There are three parts, but this one may interest people here the most)
/u/smokesanddietcokes [Adipose Industries]
Created: Mon Oct 17 06:38:10 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57x33y/fasting_physiology_part_ii_there_are_three_parts/
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https://intensivedietarymanagement.com/fasting-physiology-part-ii/
[Intro] Created an account to finally say hi!
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Oct 17 06:04:28 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57wy5t/created_an_account_to_finally_say_hi/
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[deleted]
[Discussion] Weekly Stats Update! October 17, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Mon Oct 17 06:03:45 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57wy1j/weekly_stats_update_october_17_2016/
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This is the weekly status thread for October 17, 2016.
The weekly status thread is to help motivate our users, and to eventually see how far they've come! Be it for weight loss, weight gain, or maintaining- everyone is welcome. Previous updates are archived [here.](http://www.reddit.com/r/proED/wiki/archives)
Please include the following information (with all necessary units of measurement):
* Height:
* Current weight (CW):
* Highest weight (HW):
* Lowest weight (LW):
* Goal weight (GW):
* Ultimate goal weight (UGW):
* Weight lost (WL):
* BMI: ([Use this to calculate your BMI](https://people.maths.ox.ac.uk/trefethen/bmi_calc.html))
* Age:
* Gender expression:
Here's a handy-dandy copy/paste of the above format:
* Height:
* CW:
* HW:
* LW:
* GW:
* UGW:
* WL:
* BMI:
* Age:
* Gender expression:
*****
Status threads are posted every Monday.
Have any questions or concerns? Comment below, or [PM the mods.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FproED)
[Discussion] How do you measure your progress?
/u/YourChinaDoll [5'1" | SW: 169 | CW: 124.8 |F]
Created: Mon Oct 17 05:56:21 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57wx24/how_do_you_measure_your_progress/
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This morning I woke up at the lowest weight that I've ever weighed myself, but I wasn't excited or happy about it. It still feels too high and I feel fatter than ever. But then I took some pictures and compared them to pictures of about 15 pounds ago, and I could see noticeable differences that made me feel a lot better, like what I was doing was worth it. It was really motivating. How do you measure your progress?
[Intro] First post! And first EC stack!
/u/avocadoshell
Created: Mon Oct 17 05:41:00 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57wv6s/first_post_and_first_ec_stack/
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[removed]
[Rant/Rave] Okay, lol, I'm back
/u/AmAlreadyGoingToHell [H: 5"8 | BMI: 18.7 | WL: -24 | F]
Created: Mon Oct 17 05:01:11 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57wqaj/okay_lol_im_back/
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Had fun tricking myself thinking I could be normal. I restricted perfectly for a week, had two binge days and a terrible night after taking a package of laxatives.
But it was fun. Time to get back on track and fade away.
[Thinspo] The most beautiful ribs I have ever seen
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Oct 17 04:42:01 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57wo86/the_most_beautiful_ribs_i_have_ever_seen/
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http://imgur.com/a/4db0e
[Help] Help! My boyfriend is being frustrating.
/u/electille [5'7 | 123 | 19.2 | ?]
Created: Mon Oct 17 04:13:23 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57wl9k/help_my_boyfriend_is_being_frustrating/
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My boyfriend has type 1 diabetes, and knows about my ED. He refuses to eat if I don't eat, which is a serious fucking health risk for him.
I know he's doing it because he cares, tough love and tryna use how much I care about his wellbeing to help me get better or whatever, but it just makes me feel super shitty cause I CAN'T eat certain days and I'd feel so responsible if he fainted or something.
What do?
[Help] I was waiting for this and now I'm not sure if I like it.
/u/Skinnytw [5'6 | 110 |17.8| F]
Created: Mon Oct 17 04:02:47 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57wk4z/i_was_waiting_for_this_and_now_im_not_sure_if_i/
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I saw a few posts about wanting people to comment on your weight loss... I was no different. I wanted my boyfriend to give a fuck. To magically know what is happening to me and be really sweet about it. Well, it happened. And now I want to hide under the couch like the big fat cat I once owned.
He said I can't lose more weight. I can get thinner, that's ok, but not weigh less. He made me stand on the scale in front of him, which was the most downgrading thing in our relationship ever. He said I'm pretty the way I am. He wanted to look at my naked body and complimented everything. On the one hand he makes me feel great about my weight loss, on the other hand he acts like he's concerned... He asked me a bunch of awkward questions, like if I thought I ate too much and if I felt big. I think it was the way I got really uncomfortable about it and tried to avoid answering his questions. So now he probably knows. I don't know what to do. He's the best thing that ever happened to me, his reaction is exactly how I wanted it to be, but I liked it better when I was alone in this battle...
What would you do when someone finally finds out? How should this failing fairy tale continue?
[Goal] BEAUTIFUL HUMANS 💕 it's a new week! Which means - a fresh start, forgetting last weeks downfalls and making positive steps towards reaching the person you want to be! Don't be hung up on last weeks binges, people's comments and sadden moments. Grab this week by the balls and SHINE LIKE THE SUN 🌸🎀
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Oct 17 02:49:06 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57wd1l/beautiful_humans_its_a_new_week_which_means_a/
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[deleted]
Probably the best and worst thing to ever hit the market.
/u/ohrissa [64" | 🐋🐋 | 28 | 3lbs | Ladyish]
Created: Mon Oct 17 01:55:49 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57w7zr/probably_the_best_and_worst_thing_to_ever_hit_the/
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http://steempb.com/
Caffeinated PB
150mg Per Serving
1200mg Per Jar
WHAT A TIME TO BE ALIVE!
[Discussion] Binge Simulator 2009
/u/RetailSlaveNo1 [5'2 | CW 164.8 | GW 95 | 31.22]
Created: Mon Oct 17 01:28:36 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57w5e7/binge_simulator_2009/
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I'm replaying one of my favorite games, Katamari Forever, and there's a level where you have to 'consume' as many kcals as possible. I just had over a million kcals in the game lmao.
But it really reminds me of how I am with binging. Eat anything. I don't care what. Everything in sight, just shove it down. I wouldn't be surprised if I've had thousand calorie binges (before i started logging binges so idk).
Anyway just wanted to share. Just playing that made me grossed out with food haha so it's a good binge stopped actually.
[Goal] I was surprised by my own legs today
/u/Lunar_Heart [61.75 | 88ish lbs | 16.Something | -24 | f]
Created: Mon Oct 17 00:09:10 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57vwy2/i_was_surprised_by_my_own_legs_today/
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http://imgur.com/tVKSAOQ
[Discussion] Never Enough
/u/1legallyblonde [5'10| GW 135 | -45 | F]
Created: Sun Oct 16 23:56:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57vvf9/never_enough/
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I like to think we all have our bad days and yesterday was mine. I realized last night that I will never be enough. I will never be thin enough, pretty enough or smart enough. No matter what I do. I feel like a useless piece of crap. Starting tomorrow the only way I know how.. fasting until I can't stand it. Anyone else ever feel this way sometimes?
[Rant/Rave] I hate my belly fat
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Oct 16 23:06:50 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57vpfi/i_hate_my_belly_fat/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] Conversation with the boyfriend
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Oct 16 23:04:35 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57vp4z/conversation_with_the_boyfriend/
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[deleted]
[Tip] To those of us who have gained weight or simply not made the progress we've hoped for.
/u/aerienne [5'5" | 145.8 | F]
Created: Sun Oct 16 22:48:45 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57vn5j/to_those_of_us_who_have_gained_weight_or_simply/
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Keep going.
It's not going to be as neat and tidy as we've hoped. We like to plug out stats into Losertown and see how perfectly our numbers drop as long as we 'stick to the plan'.
The end of the year is when a fair amount of people gain weight. Cool weather, lots of food, etc. and then people 'start over' on January 1st.
January 1st is in 11 weeks. Where do you want to be then? Imagine 11 weeks ago you had pushed yourself and where you would be now. Be ahead of the curve on January 1st. Finish out the year strong.
Few of us are happy with our progress or current situation, but we can change that. Remember that progress is not simply a neat, downward line. It's up, down, sideways, and everything in between. But as long as it keeps heading towards your goal, it's good.
Focus on getting today right. And if it's not perfect? Don't drag it into tomorrow. And don't make it worse. Accept what you've done, learn from it, and keep going.
-----
Right now, I am the weight I was exactly one year ago. It's as if the whole year of fasting, restricting, binging, etc. did not even happen. All of the ups and downs and I'm back. All the thoughts of the progress I could have made or where I should be come flooding in. But it's done. I can't redo anything. I can only take what I've learned and move forward.
I know what weight I was at the end of last year and I know I can pass that before the end of this one. I know that as long as I keep going, it'll be alright. I've learned so much in the past year and can apply it now. I can prove to myself I can do it.
So just keep going.
how much do you guys lose and how many calories per week do you consume?
/u/KajaIsForeverAlone [height:5'9 | CW: 147 BMI:21 | weight lost:15 lbs | Gender: F]
Created: Sun Oct 16 22:19:11 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57vj9q/how_much_do_you_guys_lose_and_how_many_calories/
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[removed]
[Rant/Rave] I dont even know what to do anymore
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Oct 16 22:17:37 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57vj17/i_dont_even_know_what_to_do_anymore/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] "I'm fine" when I'm really probably not.
/u/cigarettesandmatcha [5'2" | CW 100 | GW 95 | UGW 90 | F]
Created: Sun Oct 16 21:51:47 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57vfde/im_fine_when_im_really_probably_not/
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the pounds are dropping off slowly, but I've more or less stopped eating, so I try not to think about it. I rarely weigh myself nowadays. I don't work out anymore. I'm starting to feel the weakness again and when I try to eat, I get sick and can't keep it down. it's been years since I've been at this low of a weight but it's not even that low. my body is stupid.
I met a guy, and we love each other, which is also stupid. there's too much of a clash between us. he wants kids, he wants me to gain weight, he wants happiness. I'm still downing pain killers whenever the pain is too much and flirting with self destruction when that isn't enough. he's crazy. I wouldn't want me.
funny but I don't want anyone to worry. I feel like I'm too old now for the whole cry for help thing. I'm just used to my ways and I don't really want to change. I cut out the really harmful vices and what's left over isn't that bad. I turned 27 a couple of weeks back.
I get that this sense of control is a farce. I get that I'm toying with my life and fucking up my health, yet again. I get that I have the power to shift things and push through this storm too. it just the self destructive habits help take the edge off all the sadness and emptiness that fills up every corner of my mind.
I don't know. I don't want to romanticize what this feels like, because it's not fun, it's not nice, and I don't wish it on anyone. but it's my life. just wanted to share these feelings somewhere I could be understood.
something nice: I don't hate myself in shorts at the moment!
[Other] Love this bra 🍂
/u/frailraven [5'10 | CW 117 | LW 115 | F20]
Created: Sun Oct 16 21:43:25 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57ve7n/love_this_bra/
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http://i.imgur.com/qcvve82.jpg
[Rant/Rave] classic Binge Brain chiming in pre-beach trip
/u/disbeetch [5'3'' | 140 | 23.7 | -34 | F]
Created: Sun Oct 16 21:23:17 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57vbc1/classic_binge_brain_chiming_in_prebeach_trip/
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i'm going to the beach this week so naturally i'm eating a pint of halo top in bed right now, the nightcap to an extremely binge-y weekend. whyyyyyy
[Rant/Rave] lapse vs. relapse
/u/greyhoundpaws
Created: Sun Oct 16 20:35:39 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57v47g/lapse_vs_relapse/
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I'm a recovering bulimic and been purge free (and mostly binge free) for a couple of months now. I felt like I was really making progress, the urges to binge got easier to ignore... And then this week all I can think about is binging and for some reason I can't be bothered to talk myself out of it. The worst binge so far just happened 5 minutes ago: a baguette (basically the length of my arm) with butter and cheese, 2 chocolate bars and an ice cream cone. And now I'm lying here wanting to purge but at the same time not wanting to break my 2 months without purging!
When will this be over??? I thought of myself as well on the way towards recovery but now I feel like I'm relapsing. Is it just a lapse, can I still come back from this, or have I basically lost all the progress I've made and jumped right back into it?
I'm starting a keto diet in 2 weeks (which my therapist would not agree with, but I've put on so much weight in the past year and just can't take it anymore... Plus I feel like it will really help with the binging and cravings since I mostly binge on carbs), which I think gave me the excuse of “I might as well eat all this since I won't be able to eat any of it soon”, which I've been using all week. Not smart, I know.
This probably isn't very coherent, just needed to rant (and distract myself so I don't purge). Thanks for listening.
Edit: (On mobile so can't flair, sorry!)
[Other] Body check 10/16 124lbs
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Oct 16 19:56:14 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57uy3f/body_check_1016_124lbs/
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http://i.imgur.com/z8Iu9bm.jpg
[Goal] Starting this week off with a 1-Day fast
/u/Wildrumpus273172
Created: Sun Oct 16 19:53:34 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57uxot/starting_this_week_off_with_a_1day_fast/
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Starting in 8 minutes, I'm gonna go for about 36 hours. I went way over my goal today so it should balance me out!
[Rant/Rave] Need Some Support
/u/venetianrosequartz [5'6"|CW 142|HW 145|LW 130|GW 135|UGW 112|WL -3| BMI 22.9|Female]
Created: Sun Oct 16 19:39:01 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57uvfg/need_some_support/
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After like... a solid week of binging I weighed myself and I gained five pounds :( I'm so upset and it doesn't help that today I saw my girlfriend who is so so much skinnier than me. I feel so fat and bloated like I can physically feel the fat hanging off of me.
This week I'm gearing up to restrict again, 500 or less. I feel so suicidal but I decided its better to restrict than do something I'll permanently regret.
I just need some well wishes and some voices to help me on the straight and narrow. But mini accomplishment: throughout all that binging I didn't purge once!!!
Pls flair as rant
[Rant/Rave] "You look healthy!"
/u/slytherlin [5'5" | CW: 128 | GW:116 | NB]
Created: Sun Oct 16 19:25:29 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57utay/you_look_healthy/
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My grandma was visiting me this weekend and started complimenting me by saying, "You look very fit!!" (which was a very awesome compliment to get since I've been weight lifting), but then she had to smile and say, "Healthy. You look healthy!"
Instant dismay. People told me I looked "healthy" when I was overweight. They said I looked "healthy" when I was muuuuch fatter and when, looking back, I was absolutely gross looking. I don't want to look healthy - I want people to say I'm skinny, slim, sure, I'll take fit.
My ED had already come back last week after being """"recovering""""" for a while and weight lifting. This just confirms how much it's definitely back, lol. Being hurt by being called healthy-looking is such a disordered thought pattern. ¯\\_(ツ) _/¯
That's what I get for putting five pounds back on tho. Even if it was mostly muscle.
[Help] Tips for fasting at university?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Oct 16 19:11:02 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57uqy7/tips_for_fasting_at_university/
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[deleted]
[Meme/Humor] Tfw not sure if legs or sausages
/u/apricaught [5'3.5"| CW 116.8 |LW 114.2| 20.85| -16| F]
Created: Sun Oct 16 19:03:27 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57upqw/tfw_not_sure_if_legs_or_sausages/
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http://www.eonline.com/eol_images/Entire_Site/2013719/rs_560x415-130819161905-1024.HotDogLegs.jpg
[Help] plateau blues
/u/Kaylalalamae [5'11"| CW:195| LW:158 | HW:240 | F28]
Created: Sun Oct 16 18:39:34 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57um23/plateau_blues/
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First post, this community seems amazing and I've been struggling with this plateau and just looking for some help or support.
I've been back into restricting/purging for about two months. I managed to lose about 15 pounds pretty easily but I've been stuck for the last 2.5 weeks. I've tried everything I know to break it and so far nothing has worked. I think I need to just give it time but it's really frustrating when you're working so hard and not seeing results.
Anyways, I eat less than 1000 calories a day (anywhere from 400-800 usually). I binge/purge occasionally although I haven't done that for about 2 weeks. I work out 2-3 times a week with light cardio and weight lifting.
In the past I've been able to increase my intake and "wake up" my metabolism to break a plateau but I tried that and I'm still stuck.
What things do you do to break a plateau?
[Goal] 6th day of fasting: updates on my previous post
/u/almightylurker [5'1" | 163.2 | 30.8 | -51.8 | F]
Created: Sun Oct 16 18:39:26 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57um15/6th_day_of_fasting_updates_on_my_previous_post/
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Before fast weight: 176.4
Current weight: 166.6 (lol)
This is going much better than expected. My longest fast was 3 days that ended in a ravenous binge. But this time is so different. After I reached the 4th day my hunger is completely gone, I feel really clear headed, and I can actually say I have collarbones now.
The downsides so far is the mild joint pains, some muscle cramps, and I can't get up or move too fast or else I feel like I'm going to black out. I've just been drinking lots of water, moving slowly, and resting a little more than normal.
I might have to end the fast next Saturday (unless I feel good enough to continue) as I have my first ever job interview on Monday and might need the little boost that food provides. I'll update you guys when I reach my goal and/or break the fast. Love you all!
[Goal] New week, new fast
/u/EmpireStateBitch [5'4" | CW 120 | GW 115 | UGW 100 | F]
Created: Sun Oct 16 18:01:17 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57ufu2/new_week_new_fast/
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Did my usual weekend binge, even though I said I wouldn't. Starting the week with a fast! Anyone else?
[Meme/Humor] That binge..
/u/Skinnytw [5'6 | 110 |17.8| F]
Created: Sun Oct 16 18:00:12 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57ufmr/that_binge/
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http://imgur.com/KViiowI
[Rant/Rave] I miss my ED... mobile so no flair.
/u/TitsWithRoses [5'3" | CW:160 |-21 | GW:107]
Created: Sun Oct 16 17:34:16 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57ubbr/i_miss_my_ed_mobile_so_no_flair/
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So about two years ago, after years of struggling, I finally reached my GW of 102. I was so in love with the way my body looked and managed to keep my weight under 110 until june of last year when my mother passed away. I only ever restricted, but since her death I can't control myself. I've put on almost 40lbs and I just feel like a huge blob... recently I've started to get back into and have lost about 13lbs but I just can't stay on track the way I used to. Just wanted to rant I guess...
[Rant/Rave] It's so obvious Random Reddit people come here and just downvote everything.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Oct 16 17:25:53 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57u9xp/its_so_obvious_random_reddit_people_come_here_and/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] Frustrated #rt
/u/dirtandherbs [Height 5'2 | CW 102 | BMI 18.02 | Female]
Created: Sun Oct 16 16:58:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57u56u/frustrated_rt/
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I don't tell anyone about my past with an ED... so nobody really knows. (I moved recently which makes this pretty easy.) I can tell I'm beginning to relapse, but it's nice. It's like visiting an old friend. I'm not sure if I really want to recover or not. Nothing has even happened recently to make me feel this way. Just, out of the blue, remember that thing you used to do? That thing that made you feel so nice? That made you feel powerful? Fuck, I don't know. I can't tell anyone about this. I'm supposed to be a normal functioning adult. I don't have anybody to talk to. A part of me doesn't want to cause necessary worry or stress to anyone. Another part of me just doesn't want to get caught this early in the game. Recovery seems like such a failure to me. Being someone 'recovering' from an ED feels like such a shame. Everyone has their preconceived notion of what an ED is... like, really? An eating disorder? Aren't you a little old for that? It feels so... pathetic. I want my double-digits back! What the hell am I thinking.
[Help] leg cramps/ pains?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Oct 16 16:18:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57tyjl/leg_cramps_pains/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] I've started purging and I'm scared that I'll get addicted
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Oct 16 15:46:03 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57tt1b/ive_started_purging_and_im_scared_that_ill_get/
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[deleted]
[Discussion] Does anyone have links to harm reduction ED sites?
/u/violettevert [5'6" | fat | -10lbs | NB]
Created: Sun Oct 16 15:44:01 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57tsnn/does_anyone_have_links_to_harm_reduction_ed_sites/
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Are there even any? Like recommending what vitamins/supplements to take or how to keep your body healthier?
[Thinspo] My forever thinspo
/u/bitterorbetter [5'5| 145| 24.1 | -15 | F19]
Created: Sun Oct 16 14:37:56 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57tguw/my_forever_thinspo/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/031cca4a89f840d7bc982223666275af?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=7920cd1b2283124735a5ed81ff696e3c
[Other] Just Panera Bread Ramble
/u/TessTobias [5'5" | 120 | 19.7 | -22]
Created: Sun Oct 16 14:37:30 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57tgs7/just_panera_bread_ramble/
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Holy fucking hell. Just checking in from Panera Bread because the boyfriend wanted it for lunch. Everything is a delicious calorific nightmare and I hate coming here. I hope you're all having a lovely day!
Why would somebody eat a 400 calorie cookie!? And the lowest calorie soup has meat in it so that's out. On the plus side I have a lot of errands to run so this will be my only meal today and I'll be running around a lot.
Anyhooser, sorry for the rambling I just figured you guys would get the Panera Panic. 💕💕💕🦄 Love you all.
[Discussion] (Discussion) drop dead diva is such a good inspiration (?) show
/u/thinkthinlythrowaway
Created: Sun Oct 16 14:32:41 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57tfv6/discussion_drop_dead_diva_is_such_a_good/
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I'm not sure if inspiration is the right word but I mean come on.
Really beautiful skinny person died and gets reborn as a plus size lawyer.
Has to deal with that with her best friend model wanting her to lose weight.
One of the episode she is suing someone who has a diet program with a diet bar that was just caffeine and ephedrine and guaifenesi.
If only they were as easily as available in real life 😭😫
[Discussion] New Halo Top Reviews!
/u/newportshorty [5'9 | CW:180 | -40]
Created: Sun Oct 16 13:59:49 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57t9sw/new_halo_top_reviews/
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Hey guys! I thought maybe you'd want to hear actual reviews of the Halo Top flavors. I know the brand gets discussed a lot around here, but eh. Here I go lol. Here's what I've tried to far.
Red Velvet: This I was most excited for. It is very good, but lacks a really red velvet taste? Idk. It tastes like red velvet, but it's not super rich. It has brownie chunks in it that are really good. It's red in color. Tastes relatively chocolatey.
Pistachio: There are absolutely no actual nuts in it :( I was very disappointed in this. It does have a pistachio flavor I guess, but not nearly as pronounced as I had hoped. There's no chunks in it, just smooth light green. Very underwhelmed, probably wouldn't buy it again.
S'mores: Tastes exactly like s'mores. You know how there's honey graham crackers as well as cinnamon graham crackers? I think they used cinnamon ones in this. There's little chocolate pieces and the graham bits, and the base is very very sweet, which I liked. Not my favorite, but still pretty good.
Cookie Dough: Tastes exactly what you'd think it would taste like. Nothing over the top incredible, but good. It's just a plain vanilla tasting base (not the same vanilla as their vanilla bean flavor) and has pretty big chunks of cookie dough in it! They didn't skimp at all on them! Plenty of dough. I liked this one quite a bit, but it was sort of boring for me idk.
Oatmeal Cookie: Oh. My. God. You guys. This shit. Oh lord. So unexpectedly good. It was incredibly rich. My absolute favorite, hands down, by far. I finished a pint and went straight to the store and bought three more despite having a freezer full of the other flavors still :/ I didn't think it would be nearly as good as it was. It's so cinnamony and tastes really cookie-like! And it has actual little oats in it! So so good. So glad this one is just a 280 one.
I haven't tried the others yet, but I will eventually. If you'd like to hear more about those ones, I can post again later on. Hope this was convenient for at least one person hahaha
[Rant/Rave] Binging on "healthy" stuff
/u/Castoroilexperiment [5'6 | 105 | 29F| 17.68]
Created: Sun Oct 16 13:40:11 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57t66c/binging_on_healthy_stuff/
---
I don't buy junk so I'm not tempted, but I can't stop eating stuff like bags of carrots or tomatoes. It adds up
[Rant/Rave] "Voluptuous"
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Oct 16 13:10:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57t0sq/voluptuous/
---
[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] What the heck is wrong with me
/u/iwillbesmall [5'6" | 125lbs | F | GW: 99]
Created: Sun Oct 16 13:04:48 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57szn5/what_the_heck_is_wrong_with_me/
---
I'm to the point even I feel like zero ultra monster is even too much. Like I'll gain from it.
[Discussion] What do you usually have on your fasting days?
/u/little-paws
Created: Sun Oct 16 12:47:04 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57sw6t/what_do_you_usually_have_on_your_fasting_days/
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Only water? Or tea? Do you allow yourself things like gum, or multivitamins?
[Rant/Rave] My manager always pinches my arm fat and other tales of irritating touching...
/u/miss_morticia [5'10" | cw: 146 | gw: 105 | 20.90 | F]
Created: Sun Oct 16 12:33:34 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57stmh/my_manager_always_pinches_my_arm_fat_and_other/
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So just like the title, my manager always comes up and pinches the fat that covers my tricep on the back of my arm. I swear it feels exactly like the body mass calipers personal trainers use to get your body fat %. He does that weird little grab/pinch and rolls it between his finger and thumb. *Shudder*
I know I could ask him to stop but I don't want to because he's touchy with every one and I wouldn't really care if it didn't make me feel like he was calculating my body fat percentage every time lol.
Also, I hate when people hug me because I swear they can feel the sack of jello that is my body quivering when they embrace me. The only place that doesn't freak me out for others to touch me is if people put a hand on my shoulder. That feels safe, my shoulders are decently hard.
Anybody else hate hate hate being touched?
[Meme/Humor] Save hundreds of dollars with this one simple trick!
/u/goddamnroommate [5'6" | 143.8 | 23.30 | -50ish | F]
Created: Sun Oct 16 11:53:19 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57sm64/save_hundreds_of_dollars_with_this_one_simple/
---
Go to the store to pick up new shoes, try everything on and realize how disgustingly large your ankles calves and thighs are and throw everything back on the shelf. Leave the store without having spent a single cent!
[Goal] I am not going to weigh myself until Thanksgiving
/u/cry1000x [5'4" | 148.2 lbs | 25.4 | F]
Created: Sun Oct 16 11:28:27 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57shmz/i_am_not_going_to_weigh_myself_until_thanksgiving/
---
**Prepare for rambling**
The last time I weighed myself was September 14th and I had just returned from vacation during which, and I kid you not, I was *perfect*. I only ate from places that provided calorie info and then bought groceries because our place had a kitchen. And I lost weight on the trip. I even worked out everyday on our patio overlooking the ocean.
But two days after getting home I binged so bad it was the closest I've been to going to the hospital because I was in so much pain.
That binge triggered a two week free for all and I know I gained back a lot.
Weighing myself everyday is not good for someone like me because I:
* Am a total salt junkie. Hello water retention.
* Eat artificial sweeteners basically everyday. Again more water retention.
* I've been lifting weights much more lately and the muscle growth/fat loss is just too hard to handle psychologically if the scale number is moving up even if it's muscle which I want.
November 1st I'm going to take measurements which I want to be a "First of the Month" ritual. But as far as the scale, I can't bear to see fluctuating numbers for a while. And I think Thanksgiving morning is a good day. It will keep me accountable from now until a day I plan on letting myself relax anyway. I will be drinking and I've come to terms with not being able to stop myself from eating if I'm drunk (I drink roughly once a month).
I'm also doing this because last Thanksgiving morning I weighed in at my second-lowest adult weight ever and it was one of the best I ever looked. I got so many compliments on my dress which was kind of revealing so I know they were really complimenting my body. I find this motivating.
Anybody doing something similar? Holding off from the scale until a certain point?
[Discussion] Anyone else have a non-scale-related ultimate goal?
/u/autumn-lights [5'5| CW 164 | 27.3 | 21F]
Created: Sun Oct 16 11:03:02 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57scvj/anyone_else_have_a_nonscalerelated_ultimate_goal/
---
I don't really have a goal weight. I've never been lower than 130 lbs in my adult life so I don't really know what less would look like on me. I just know that I want 1) no more gross hip fat poking over the waistband of my jeans and 2) a thigh gap. I'd love to lose some boob weight too because I can't imagine rocking F-cups at a tinier weight.
Anyone else like me?
[Goal] feeling unstoppable and wanted to share!
/u/throwingupstones
Created: Sun Oct 16 11:02:44 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57scte/feeling_unstoppable_and_wanted_to_share/
---
https://imgur.com/a/5f56G
[Discussion] When do you find it easiest to begin a fast?
/u/sossox
Created: Sun Oct 16 10:46:35 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57s9vr/when_do_you_find_it_easiest_to_begin_a_fast/
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Day of the week or time of day? I find the weekends absolutely horrid. For me it works best if I do it through the week so I'm busy with a school and not sitting around with nothing to do but eat all day. (Can't flair on mobile)
[Rant/Rave] I can't tell a difference
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Oct 16 10:07:41 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57s2uz/i_cant_tell_a_difference/
---
[removed]
[Discussion] Daily Food Diary! October 16, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Sun Oct 16 10:02:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57s1xi/daily_food_diary_october_16_2016/
---
This is a daily food diary thread for October 16, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
[Help] Why am i afraid...
/u/dudeswallow
Created: Sun Oct 16 09:43:10 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57rym4/why_am_i_afraid/
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of veggies but not potato chips? If u relate, how do you handle that?
[Rant/Rave] Expected to be in a bathing suit in 4 days and practically having a panic attack.
/u/aerienne [5'5" | 145.8 | F]
Created: Sun Oct 16 09:29:41 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57rwda/expected_to_be_in_a_bathing_suit_in_4_days_and/
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The family I work for just told me I'm taking their kids to a waterpark on Thursday. I'm expected to be in there with them the whole time. I have a black one piece, but it's a competition swim suit so it's a bit high and tight. I'd normally calm myself by wearing shorts with it or something, but I didn't bring any.
I want to scream that I don't want to go. I didn't sign up for this and that I shouldn't have to go. They're making me skip my class too as I normally work morning and evening, but go to class in the afternoon.
I know I'm going to have to do it, I just figured I'd be safe from having to be in bathing suit for a while and I'm pissed off. Thank you for listening.
[Discussion] How long does it take for you to recover from a binge?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Oct 16 09:25:23 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57rvow/how_long_does_it_take_for_you_to_recover_from_a/
---
[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] homecoming wrecked me
/u/salt_skin [5'4" | CW 134lbs | BMI 23.45 | GW 90 lbs | F]
Created: Sun Oct 16 08:09:12 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57rk8t/homecoming_wrecked_me/
---
i had over 1200 calories in alcohol alone, then munchies hit. i had a respectable low calorie lunch which still did some damage, but when when i got home i made a whole pot of pasta. i don't understand why because i wasn't hungry. not only did i eat for no reason, i made myself sick because i overate after restricting all week. my stomach tried to reject it, but it couldn't and so i went to bed feeling full, nauseous and guilty. i'm so disappointed in myself.
[Discussion] Does anyone use Red Rockets or Hydroxycut?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Oct 16 07:22:05 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57rdsy/does_anyone_use_red_rockets_or_hydroxycut/
---
[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] obliterated 2 months of progress in 7 days and i feel numb
/u/cactuskey [5'0 | CW: 105lb | GW: 75lb | 26F]
Created: Sun Oct 16 07:20:56 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57rdo5/obliterated_2_months_of_progress_in_7_days_and_i/
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i've been gone from this subreddit for a little while having a great time self-sabotaging. the past 7 days I just ate whatever the hell I wanted. I hadnt had my period in 2 months and thought "i guess i need to eat" and it spiraled out of control. i didn't binge or eat 5 pizzas and 3 gallons of ice cream a day or anything like people really struggling with BED have to go through, I just ate junk and didn't count calories at all. Gained ~7lbs(??!?!). Period is STILL a no-show but the scale now tells me 111.4 every time I step on it. i was 104lbs on the 6th. I hadn't been 111lbs since mid-August.
I'm hoping it's really just 4lbs and a lot of water. I was supposed to lose 2lbs this week, so best case scenario i'm 6lbs behind schedule. worst case, I literally fucked 2 months of hard work right in the ass.
fuck it. I'm going to fast until family holidays force me to eat. I've done long fasts before. i honestly don't even want to break my fast for thanksgiving dinner because it's going to be at my cousin's house and they eat absolute shit there. really low quality food. I do NOT want to "waste" my thanksgiving meal on hamburger helper and re-hydrated mashed potato powder.
the only reason I'd eat something is to not tip off my mother. ugh. I just feel stuck and trapped.
[Other] I went from obese to underweight. My story.
/u/29THD03Z
Created: Sun Oct 16 07:02:48 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57rbde/i_went_from_obese_to_underweight_my_story/
---
I have been Lurking here for a while. In the begining it rocked, lately it got more light hearted. But it seems like most of you aren't very severe so the light hearted feel is probably okay.
I was fat my whole life. The boys never liked it but the women who cooked absolutely loved me. Everyone always had these jokes about me. Like my mom would look for holes in my chair, because she said it's not possible to eat that much. Haha right. My parents left the country so I went to live with my grandmother. She would always praise me because food no longer gets wasted in her home. Again. How great am I. But I was obese. At 18 I was 200lbs on a 5'4 frame.
I was on facebook and somebody shared a video made by Eugenia Cooney. I started watching All Of her videos and there was one where she read a comment somebody sent her, which said something about being 83lbs, and Eugenia goes "About the same as me". And I just wanted to look as beautiful, graceful, and weak as her. I wanted it more than anything.
So the first week I only ate one cooked egg a day. My family didn't care that I was on a diet. Because that's what fat people do. The second week I had only black coffee in the morning and 5 grapes for lunch. I never thought I could do it. But I would just watch some Eugenia and be happy again and play with my fat in the mirror for hours. The first 2 weeks I lost 15lbs. I soon decided that that wasn't enough and just completely stopped eating. My grandmother started asking questions. I got myself a dog from the shelter, names James and he's the cutest thing. Since it wasn't strange for me to eat in my room I would get a plate and overload it with meat and bread as always. Grandma smiled. And I would feed it all to James. Sometimes it would be too much and I would throw it in my backpack. And go for "walks" and just hand it out to some homeless. After 6 weeks I had lost 50lbs. I started eating little cups of soup to just feel okay. Because I was ALWAYS cold and had these headaches. Everyone started asking about the weightloss and I claimed it's all the exercise. Which wasn't lying because I ran atleast a mile a day. Almost fucking dying. The weightloss slowed down from 150lbs. But I recently my BMI read 'underweight'. I started ignoring all of the questions and just stopped giving a fuck about my grandma's anger and all of the interventions. I just wana be 83lbs. And I will get there. I will be weak.
[Other] Vacation in 3 weeks - who wants to fast with me?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Oct 16 06:57:26 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57ranp/vacation_in_3_weeks_who_wants_to_fast_with_me/
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[removed]
[Discussion] Can we talk about Eugenia Cooney for a minute?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Oct 16 05:46:42 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57r2nx/can_we_talk_about_eugenia_cooney_for_a_minute/
---
[deleted]
[Help] it is so hard...
/u/skinnylove73 [5'10 | 125 | 17.49 | -15 | F]
Created: Sun Oct 16 05:32:44 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57r1ea/it_is_so_hard/
---
to be doing everything the slow way. I just recently got out of treatment about 6 months ago and have been having to slowly loose weight so no one notices right away. it is so hard to to maintain motivation and excitement. any advice?
[Help] Breaking a fast
/u/queen_sriracha
Created: Sun Oct 16 05:10:12 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57qzcd/breaking_a_fast/
---
I'm curious to know how you break your fasts.
Previously I've just crashed and had a binge, but that made my stomach really upset, so I want to know what you do to make the transition smooth.
[Help] All I want is a thigh gap
/u/little-paws
Created: Sun Oct 16 04:59:49 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57qyct/all_i_want_is_a_thigh_gap/
---
If I have a thigh gap I will be happy.
I'm 5'4 and 134 lbs. I just need to know how much to weigh for a thigh gap.
I'm so angry with myself, why do I lack so much discipline? I see so many beautiful people on here and wonder why I can't be the same.
[Rant/Rave] Fr tho fuck medication
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Oct 16 04:35:32 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57qwa5/fr_tho_fuck_medication/
---
[deleted]
[Thinspo] Throwback: Two years ago when I was at my ideal weight
/u/DontTellWendy [5'7" | 70kg | GW: 60kg | F]
Created: Sun Oct 16 03:43:22 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57qrmh/throwback_two_years_ago_when_i_was_at_my_ideal/
---
http://imgur.com/YsD2pP2
[Rant/Rave] Stupid drunken conversations triggering me
/u/explodingrhinoceros [5'7" | CW: 166.0 | BMI: 25.9 | SW: 220.0 lbs | GW: 125.0 lbs | F]
Created: Sun Oct 16 01:39:00 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57qh9i/stupid_drunken_conversations_triggering_me/
---
I was told drunkenly by a guy I might like that "Come on, you'd only be a day shift stripper. I mean, maybe if you hit the gym or something..."
Funny thing is, he has dated strippers in the past. And we were literally just poking fun at each other and being stupid and drunk.
That's okay, I didn't want to eat breakfast tomorrow. Coffee is fine.
[Discussion] best halo top flavour?
/u/namelessgia
Created: Sun Oct 16 00:27:36 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57qarw/best_halo_top_flavour/
---
i've been lurking for a little while now but this is my first post here so hi!
i finally found somewhere in my city that stocks halo top and i'm gonna go shopping for some tomorrow, so i was just wondering which flavours you would all suggest and which ones i should give a miss, if any? :)
[Help] Day and Night?
/u/Pigeons_r_life [5'0 | 77 lbs | 15.04 | f]
Created: Sun Oct 16 00:15:30 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57q9m5/day_and_night/
---
For quite a while now, every time I try some of my nice fitting clothes at night, I feel thin and confident. With this in mind, I tell myself to wear this outfit the next day in public. But when tomorrow morning comes and I try the outfit again, I feel disgusting and fat and resort to my usual baggy clothing. Is it because I'm suddenly under the anxiety that people will see my physique? Do you guys go through this as well? Any advice is appreciated
[Meme/Humor] vacation: a haiku
/u/yikes_dot_com [5'6 | 111 | 17.9 | F]
Created: Sat Oct 15 23:02:24 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57q1k4/vacation_a_haiku/
---
oh my fucking god
did I just fucking eat that
oh no please god no
[Discussion] Does anyone chew & spit? (Mobile no flair)
/u/dontcareifithurts__ [5'4.5 | 117 | - 4.2 | F]
Created: Sat Oct 15 22:33:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57py2i/does_anyone_chew_spit_mobile_no_flair/
---
I'm mostly a restricter, but there have been times in my life when I'm trying to kick-start a new "diet" (aka starving myself) and in those first few days I have an extremely hard time not eating fatty foods & candy. So, I used to chew & spit in moments I was feeling particularly weak to preventa binge.
I haven't done this in probably 2 years because I read that it was terrible for your teeth and makes your face swell up like mad because of the excess saliva production, but my point here is that I never really see anyone bring it up.
So, I'm just curious who else does/used to chew & spit... and what are your experiences (good or bad) with it. Is it just not common? Am I weird?
[Rant/Rave] ate so much at a party :(
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Oct 15 21:33:12 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57pqca/ate_so_much_at_a_party/
---
I don't know why I'm writing this but I'm so angry at myself. I only had 70 cal today until I went to a small party and binged :( I have no idea how much I ate but I'm certain it was a lot! all of the foods were my weaknesses like chips, fruit and candy. my stomach feels like it could burst and I'm crying, I'm so angry with myself!! I finally got down to 96 lbs and I'm so afraid of undoing my progress.
[Rant/Rave] My mom doesn't even care about my ED
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Oct 15 21:08:56 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57pn54/my_mom_doesnt_even_care_about_my_ed/
---
[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] My little brother got married today
/u/hawaiianhaole01 [5'6 | 126.7 | 20.5 | GW 115 | F]
Created: Sat Oct 15 21:07:13 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57pmw6/my_little_brother_got_married_today/
---
At the wedding, there were a ton of people I haven't seen since I moved from my hometown 6 years ago. I had so many comment on how they didn't recognize me because I was so skinny and had a few tell me that I looked like Eleven from Stranger Things. That one was kind of weird, but at the same time, being compared to a tween felt pretty good at 25. It felt so wonderful to have so many people notice and only made me want to lose more and more.
[Other] Bad day getting better (dad update and ate all the food)
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Oct 15 20:12:22 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57pfe1/bad_day_getting_better_dad_update_and_ate_all_the/
---
[deleted]
[Meme/Humor] Little embarrassing things...
/u/ThroeAwaymeron [5'2" | 104.4 | 19.78 | F]
Created: Sat Oct 15 20:12:20 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57pfdw/little_embarrassing_things/
---
We all have them, right? I just caught myself totally over-commenting on my roommate's meal she was cooking, lmao :( it smelled good and she was like "yep it's fried in a little too much oil" and I literally said *that's why it smells good*...rofl. I sounded liek a starving oerson and today was a pretty high-cal day.
Then I rambled about how I want carbs and cheese too much in the winter. All to this skinny girl who doesn't care and was just trying to eat :( lmao
Someone else share a "moment" so I'm not alone in my embarrassment please~ hahaha.
(Unsure of the flair on this but I think this is suitable, let me know if not.)
[Discussion] (Possible TW) What was your worst binge ever?
/u/qwertyidklol [5'4" | 121.0 | 20.77 | -11.3 | F]
Created: Sat Oct 15 20:03:05 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57pe2t/possible_tw_what_was_your_worst_binge_ever/
---
I had mine a couple of weeks ago and am still horrified to how much I ate.
I think mine was just one of those "fuck everything" days and decided to binge
I ate...
* A pint of Ben and Jerry's PB and cookies ice cream
* A whole packet of birthday cake oreos
* A whole container of smores pop tarts
* A bag of salt and vinegar chips (destroyed my mouth and tastebuds)
* A package of reese's big sized peanut butter cups
* Two heaping bowls of frosted flakes with milk
* Bagel with cream cheese
Didn't even purge it because I was in the most pain I've ever been.
[Rant/Rave] I'm falling apart.
/u/peanutbutteredbanana
Created: Sat Oct 15 20:00:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57pdox/im_falling_apart/
---
Ignore my stupid rant. I just need to get this out.
My eating disorder is the only reason I keep living, which is ironic since it will kill me. It's sick to realize that the only form of enjoyment I get now is from having my weight plummet even lower. I can't feel anything besides anger and disappointment due to my disgusting weight and body. I don't know what to do anymore. I don't want to live anymore. I thought maybe someone would care at this point where I'm clearly underweight. I thought maybe someone would want me here. No one does. I'm worthless. I just wish my body would give up on me and let me go.
[Goal] on mobile can't flair. but hit 115 so I'm celebrating with a night alone with Jack daniels hehe
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Oct 15 19:55:05 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57pcv8/on_mobile_cant_flair_but_hit_115_so_im/
---
https://i.reddituploads.com/70c211666d52431f9f956bcd09786478?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=2be9977987a164f83d089f78f2416931
[Rant/Rave] why can't i just restrict? its so simple
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Oct 15 19:44:16 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57pbd4/why_cant_i_just_restrict_its_so_simple/
---
[deleted]
[Discussion] Share your #aesthetic?
/u/The_Marshmallow_Test [5'5 | CW:dont weigh :3| GW:skinny arms| F]
Created: Sat Oct 15 19:30:29 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57p9br/share_your_aesthetic/
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Anybody want to share a photo/link or two of their personal aesthetic?
I feel like this thread might totally fail cause you guys gotta go out and find like links and pics and stuff, but I thought it would be a fun way to get to know you guys and to see what kind of variety of personal styles there are on here.
I constantly hoard images I really like on my phone and then make these weird collages out of them (for some reason almost always while I sit on the toilet lol). Obviously noooo pressure to make a collage thing, if there just a photo you really identity with or w.e that's cool too!
[Here's a recent one](http://imgur.com/qdTJesx) (as you can see i'm caught between wanting to be a coked out artist and a math equation)
[Help] Send Help !
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Oct 15 19:19:44 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57p7pq/send_help/
---
[deleted]
[Discussion] Dae feel better eating smaller volumes?
/u/dudeswallow
Created: Sat Oct 15 19:14:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57p71e/dae_feel_better_eating_smaller_volumes/
---
Like I feel less lethargic eating peas vs salad or blueberries vs an Apple
[Discussion] I would flip my shit.
/u/AnnaArkadyevna [5'8" | 202.0 | 30.38 | -18 | F]
Created: Sat Oct 15 18:45:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57p2vq/i_would_flip_my_shit/
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http://i.imgur.com/EYOdVUP.jpg
[Rant/Rave] just checked my weight and im at like nearly 130lbs, coincidentally i am ready 2 die [rant/vent]
/u/leatherhoff [5"3 | TOO MUCH | ftm]
Created: Sat Oct 15 18:38:45 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57p1ux/just_checked_my_weight_and_im_at_like_nearly/
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i know it was after a binge and i was still wearing my clothes so its not exactly accuurate but hollllllly fuck im freaking out a little i need to starve this off but the time between now and me actually physically having burned off alll the bad food is way too far away it could take days i dont know i hate to ask this but holy moly please reasure me that i can starve this off or something ksdjflksskf
[Thinspo] yoona
/u/wearebulletproof [5'4 | fat | 20F🎀✨]
Created: Sat Oct 15 18:34:17 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57p150/yoona/
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http://imgur.com/a/ZVVI7
[Help] Been having a shitty week and need some new restricting motivation :-)
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Oct 15 18:13:20 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57oxyk/been_having_a_shitty_week_and_need_some_new/
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[deleted]
[Discussion] Did you ever got the reaction you wanted?
/u/ED2134 [168cm | fat | female| -10kg]
Created: Sat Oct 15 18:12:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57oxw6/did_you_ever_got_the_reaction_you_wanted/
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assuming somebody found out about your ED. what reaction would you like best? And did it ever happen?
I would love for somebody just to tell me that i'm great exactly the way I am, that I don't need to be ashamed for all the selfhatred. And that I'm not alone in this, that there is somebody that cares and supports me no matter how support may look like.
I never got that reaction.
But I got reactions like: you are just doing it for attention; you trying to be something special; I know how you feel, once I didn't eat for an entire day ( that actually made ma laugh ;) ) and of course the standard answer: you are hurting yourself, you need to get help and if you do not do it yourself I will make you.
Body check 10/13 124 lbs
/u/frailraven [5'10 | CW 117 | LW 115 | F20]
Created: Sat Oct 15 17:53:21 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57ouvi/body_check_1013_124_lbs/
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http://i.imgur.com/dHDC4K0.jpg
[Thinspo] Black Swan is my ultimate thinspo
/u/frailraven [5'10 | CW 117 | LW 115 | F20]
Created: Sat Oct 15 17:21:33 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57opyd/black_swan_is_my_ultimate_thinspo/
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http://i.imgur.com/ekg4blT.jpg
[Rant/Rave] [Rant] This weekend has been Hell.
/u/twigsandbones [5'6 | cw; fat | 19.4 | 18f]
Created: Sat Oct 15 16:56:49 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57olvy/rant_this_weekend_has_been_hell/
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I posted a couple of days that I was going to see my parents this weekend and I would have to eat. Well, I'm nearly finished the weekend here(going home later tonight) and it's been horrible.
My parents know about my ED so I've had to eat around 2000 calorie each day as they think food = cures ED. Because I don't want any arguments, I've agreed and just eaten so much horrible food.
I've managed to secretly exercise for an hour tonight and drank loads of water but I feel so full and fat.
I'm planning to fast until dinner as they're making me a roast before I go(I'm planning to eat 1/4 of it and "bring the rest home"(bin) ) however I'm scared to weigh myself tomorrow.
I know I can restrict and go back to normal but I just feel horrible with all this food in my body and I'm scared to see the scale go up :( I don't know, I just feel like utter shxt.
edit; formatting
[Discussion] What are you afraid of?
/u/Pitaia [1.70cm | CW: aaaHHAHA | BMI: ? |GW: S M A L L|GQ]
Created: Sat Oct 15 16:42:29 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57ojk0/what_are_you_afraid_of/
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What are you scared your ED will make you do, make of you or lead to? What are you afraid people think? What about that you think? A lot aren't scared of death from this. I'm just the old "that it'll never be enough" scared. Because you know what, the more I lose, the more I gain. And not in a good way.
[Rant/Rave] Apparently I don't have an eating disorder, I just want one?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Oct 15 16:23:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57ogk3/apparently_i_dont_have_an_eating_disorder_i_just/
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[deleted]
[Help] Any recommendations for no sugar low cal snacks?
/u/thinspo2016 [5'6 | 95 | 15.8 | 35 | Male]
Created: Sat Oct 15 15:50:35 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57ob4m/any_recommendations_for_no_sugar_low_cal_snacks/
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Hi, I apologize if stuff like this has been asked before but I'm just a little lost and looking for advice. My girlfriend and I have both been restricting for a large chunk of our lives and got to know each other through EDs (romantic I know) and after a rough patch, she's getting back into restricting. I'm currently undergoing recovery so I can't be restricting and experimenting alongside her, but her intake was way less than mine when I was restricting (she eats about 100 calories a day, often less because she's constantly burning it off on her feet all day, whereas I would have 380 a day).
Her dentist has told her that she needs to drastically reduce her intake of sugary things (I'm unsure of why but if it's necessary I can get specifics) and during the day she would mainly just have a Coke Zero and mints and water. Because of the no sugar rule, the majority of what she eats his gone, so I was wondering if anyone had any really low calories no sugar/naturally sugared things to keep her full? The only things I have in mind is sugar free gum and apples, but any help would be appreciated
[Rant/Rave] Today was my goal to reach 150 and I binged last night :(
/u/onlyroom_forthin [5'6 | CW:149.6 | 24.24 | SW:165 | UGW:120 | F]
Created: Sat Oct 15 15:47:38 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57oamf/today_was_my_goal_to_reach_150_and_i_binged_last/
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I have goal dates for all my goal* weights, so today was my day to hit 150. Yesterday morning I weighed in at 150.4, so I figured I could probably hit 150 today and I was REALLY excited to reach the goal on my actual goal day, and then I binged...:( I hit my calorie goal after like two shots, but then my boyfriend wanted to go get fast food. I should've just said no and gone to bed, but I went with. I was going to get like a small side of fries or something, count it on today's calories because it was after midnight (lol) and then just be good today, but no. I got a large combo plus an extra side. Kill me. So this morning I weighed in at 151.4 again, and I'm just so irritated with myself.
I thought about fasting today to make up for it, but I'm really worried that would trigger another binge, so I'm just going to go back to normal. So far I've eaten an apple and some pickles. Ugh. Hate myself sometimes.
[Meme/Humor] What Pokémon is at your SW, CW, and GW?
/u/hazelconner [5'4" | 174.5 | 33.2% BF | -15.5 | X/F]
Created: Sat Oct 15 15:21:49 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57o6hl/what_pokémon_is_at_your_sw_cw_and_gw/
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[Pokémon by Weight](http://bulbapedia.bulbagarden.net/wiki/List_of_Pokémon_by_weight)
So for me I started a few pounds over Blastoise, I am currently a pound and a half more than a Starmie.
I want to be a Slowbro by Halloween and a Golduck by my birthday. My UGW is Nidoking.
[Rant/Rave] Starting over
/u/friday99 [5'2 | 134 | 24.5 | GW 115 | F]
Created: Sat Oct 15 14:44:04 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57o09g/starting_over/
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On my phone so I can't flair. 5'2/135. I've put on 30 lbs and it's killing me. I miss my hip bones. And size zero. I'm a 4 currently and I feel disgusting, even though logically I know there are worse things than being a 4. I digress.
Went out with some friends from rehab last night. We went for Italian (kill me) and I want to start fresh. My goal is to start small...30 days no bingeing. We shall see. I figured I'd post here in hopes for some accountability.
[Goal] I'm excited for next week [goal]
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Oct 15 13:48:53 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57nr1d/im_excited_for_next_week_goal/
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[deleted]
[Discussion] Insults people have said about your ED?
/u/H2OandCaffeine [5ft7 | FAT | -20 lbs | F]
Created: Sat Oct 15 13:34:52 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57noqc/insults_people_have_said_about_your_ed/
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Those who have been insulted for your ED, which insults stick out the most? For example my boyfriend this morning was mad at me for taking too long to get ready to go eat and said, "I'm not like you, I need to eat more than one meal a day. I can't live off 200 calories a day." it hurt cause I've been trying really fucking hard to eat normally while I'm staying with him.
What's a good weight for someone who's a 5"10" male?
/u/invisiblepan
Created: Sat Oct 15 13:24:56 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57nn1g/whats_a_good_weight_for_someone_whos_a_510_male/
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[removed]
[Rant/Rave] Really wish my bf would just fucking compliment me.
/u/justonenon-blonde [5'3" | CW: 126 | GW:105 | 23F]
Created: Sat Oct 15 13:21:59 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57nmj7/really_wish_my_bf_would_just_fucking_compliment_me/
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Super selfish, I know D':
My boyfriend is the guy who will only say something nice "if I really deserve it." I lost seven pounds in the last 12 days, spent $200 on the clothes he told me he wished I wore, and fucking nothing. I know I'm being selfish and petty, but just a "hey you look nice in that shirt" or "you look kinda pretty today" would shoot my confidence through the roof. Maybe ten more pounds and I'll deserve it.
[Discussion] How often do you weigh yourself?
/u/bequietbelly [5'10" | CW 152 | HW ≥ 200 |LW 130 | GW 125 | F]
Created: Sat Oct 15 13:02:55 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57nj9t/how_often_do_you_weigh_yourself/
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I've been trying to cut back to once a week, or even every two weeks, because I've been driving myself insane.
I keep stepping off the scale and immediately hopping back on it. Then I leave for a few hours and quickly jump back on, as if sneaking up on the bastard will surprise it into giving me a better answer. I feel ridiculous.
How often do you weigh yourselves?
[Discussion] Anyone prescribed Vyvanase?
/u/mckenziemudkip [5'2 | CW:109(-21) GW:88 | BMI 20.45| F/20]
Created: Sat Oct 15 12:59:03 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57niko/anyone_prescribed_vyvanase/
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I really want Vyvanase. I heard it's basically adderall and you don't eat when on it. Sounds super.
So, I'm on the website reading the "checklist" of B.E,D and it says that it can't be present with another eating disorder? Specifically this:
"Unlike adults with other eating disorders, those with Binge Eating Disorder don’t routinely try to “undo” their excessive eating with extreme actions like throwing up or over-exercising. Binge Eating Disorder is not part of another eating disorder"
I really feel like I have B.E.D, because I will eat until I can barely breathe, my stomach is HUGE, and it hurts to even lay down. This happens now only about once a week. But, I always take laxatives and try to restrict enough to make all the calories balance out. (Not that I'm always successful, but yeah lol)
I mean, I was diagnosed with anorexia/bulimia when I was 15, but is it not possible for someone to develop anorexia BECAUSE of B.E.D?
Idk. I just want the damn prescription to help me restrict lol
How did it work out for anyone here with other eating disorders getting a prescription?
[Rant/Rave] I had a full on freakout over dinner.
/u/KillingKylie [5'5| Meh|-38|F|GW: 97]
Created: Sat Oct 15 12:56:56 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57ni8p/i_had_a_full_on_freakout_over_dinner/
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My best friend and my fiancé have been up my ass about losing even more weight lately; I mean, I went shopping with my bestie yesterday and she was petting my spine since it can be seen through my shirt.
So I came home last night and my fiancé said if I didn't eat dinner he would have me hauled off to the hospital. Now I know they cannot do anything to me to make me stay in a hospital, but I don't want the added drama of a long night in the ER. But, he pushed me to far; he wanted me to eat a disgusting cheese burger and fries. He expected me to eat the whole thing and just sit home and watch TV with him after.
I threw the fries across our living room, smashed the burger in the carpet and threw the soda at the wall.
He still made me eat. I feel fucking disgusting. I don't eat most days and this was so many calories and he made me eat again today. Disgusting, globy fat producing calories sitting like a brick in my fat stomach and expanding my enormous thighs.
I hate myself. I will fast Sunday-Wednesday afternoon. I will exercise 2 hours a day 7 days a week instead of 5. If he keeps forcing me to eat I will end this relationship and move out. My body, my choice.
[Discussion] How much caffeine do you drink per day?
/u/edgecomplex [5'3| CW: 137 | BMI 24.9| 29 lost | 17F]
Created: Sat Oct 15 12:56:18 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57ni4x/how_much_caffeine_do_you_drink_per_day/
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Today I had an Ultra Zero Monster, two cups of coffee, and a small iced Americano. I could definitely go for another monster. Caffeine is life.
[Goal] Welp, I am wayy late to this party...
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Oct 15 12:51:02 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57nh7w/welp_i_am_wayy_late_to_this_party/
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https://i.redd.it/hsmauxoqporx.jpg
[Discussion] Any foods you can no longer eat? (Food intolerance)
/u/Gabi_Cat [5'5" | CW:125 | BMI: 20.7 | -75 lbs | F]
Created: Sat Oct 15 12:11:24 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57najd/any_foods_you_can_no_longer_eat_food_intolerance/
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Hello everyone! I was just wondering if anyone else suffers from food intolerances? I have a long history of on/off eating problems and I am a pescatarian (only eats fish as opposed to cows, pigs, poultry, etc.) and I have a lot of foods I can't eat. I was just wondering if any of you are in the same boat? It makes it easier to restrict but more annoying for other reasons.
In case you were wondering, the foods I can't eat are: legumes (beans, chickpeas,etc.), lentils, apples, pears, carrots, SOY!!- very severe, and I avoid things like kale/harsh greens because my stomach can't break them down well and they tend to just hurt my gut.
[Help] [help] Desperate to purge. Have failed two days in a row.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Oct 15 11:46:12 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57n69c/help_desperate_to_purge_have_failed_two_days_in_a/
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[removed]
[Rant/Rave] When you KNOW your boyfriend would like it more if you were thinner.
/u/fishysandwich [5'3.5 | 115 | GW: 100 | -30 | F]
Created: Sat Oct 15 11:36:52 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57n4oo/when_you_know_your_boyfriend_would_like_it_more/
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My boyfriend is great and amazing, and he always makes me feel loved and gorgeous. He loves to grab me all over and tell me
how he loves my body and loves me the way I am. He always tells me I'm fine the weight I am and wouldn't mind if I lost, maintain, or gained as he'd always love my body.
Sometimes though I feel like he'd really prefer me thinner. I lost about 2 lbs recently and my hipbones stick out even more, and he just complimented how great they looked in my jeans when I lie down. I mean, I'm happy he likes them, I do too, but it just triggers me to keep going with my weight loss.
[Help] [Help] How many calories are in the end crust of pizza?
/u/apricaught [5'3.5"| CW 116.8 |LW 114.2| 20.85| -16| F]
Created: Sat Oct 15 11:31:16 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57n3p7/help_how_many_calories_are_in_the_end_crust_of/
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Apparently my brain thought eating 5 crusts plus papa johns garlic sauce was better than eating a slice of pizza. Literally wtf. It's just the end part, not the bottom, so I have no clue how to calculate this. Thoughts?
[Rant/Rave] My first binge since I started restricting again
/u/erilaz- [5'7 | CW: 185 | GW: 110 | -45lbs | F]
Created: Sat Oct 15 10:11:48 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57mq2a/my_first_binge_since_i_started_restricting_again/
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I'm on mobile so I can't flair
But I'm so anxious about this planned binge. It's my college's homecoming football game as well as a friends 21st. I ate a breakfast sandwich and a half a bottle of whiskey and it's just going to keep going
I plan on a fast for two days after but pls send me some good vibes. All I want to do is have a good time and not stress about calories for a few minutes. I've missed my friends and they're all here and I've kind of drunk but I am so grateful for this community ❤️❤️❤️
[Goal] Homecoming is a week away and I bought my first size "1" dress in my entire life. (Still think it's a lie) but a milestone nonetheless
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Oct 15 10:04:06 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57moq0/homecoming_is_a_week_away_and_i_bought_my_first/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/4f3ba2d13e9d439f91a2145cfa554d1d?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=6159032879b2f0528097b38358aa37ae
[Discussion] Daily Food Diary! October 15, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Sat Oct 15 10:02:21 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57mof0/daily_food_diary_october_15_2016/
---
This is a daily food diary thread for October 15, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
[Discussion] Weirdly niche thinspo that is specific to you?
/u/bumblers [5'8"| 125.3 | -20 | F]
Created: Sat Oct 15 09:54:03 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57mn2m/weirdly_niche_thinspo_that_is_specific_to_you/
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Hello lovely people! ♥ I was thinking- there's some really common thinspo, in the form of posed pictures of models and the like, (which is awesome don't get me wrong i luv me some cara) but does anyone else have some unorthodox thinspo? Or something you maybe saw as a child and it stuck with you???
Mine, please god don't judge me, was that cartoon Totally Spies? They were just so slender and tall and those [latex looking jumpsuits !!!!!!!](http://cdn32.sptndigital.com/sites/uk.pop/files/ct_series_f_primary_image/totally-spies.png)
anyways i'd love to hear yours !
[Other] I'm at a team lunch right now, watching everyone eat pizza.
/u/kennedyconnolly [5'9| 120 | 17.4]
Created: Sat Oct 15 09:48:02 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57mm37/im_at_a_team_lunch_right_now_watching_everyone/
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After our 10mile practice this morning we all went out to lunch. Everyone is gorging on pizza and I am pulling the "my stomach hurts because of the workout I can't eat". No one is actually questioning it haha!! Win for me!! I'm not even that tempted. And this is great because when I get home my parents won't force me to eat because they think I ate lunch!
[Discussion] First time fasting again in over 2 years
/u/the-silencing [5'5.5 | 126 | 20.8 | -8lbs | F]
Created: Sat Oct 15 09:10:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57mgaf/first_time_fasting_again_in_over_2_years/
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Hi Guys,
I've had such a shitty year and things have been getting to me so much over the last few months. I came to the stupid conclusion that the only way to make myself feel better would be to fast for a few days. I feel i've been largely in control for the last two years so I dont really understand why i'm suddenly fasting. Probably so I feel a bit in control of my life for a few days and have something to concentrate on.
Anyway my question is that i've not eaten anything in over two days now, apart from coke zero, gum and a few coffees each day. Today I feel weird though and I haven't felt like this the last times i fasted (that i remember, the last time was probably two or three years ago). I'm feeling very light-headed (almost like that feeling you get when high) and shaky like 24/7 and my body keeps going VERY hot then cold. Like one minute i'm sweating so much i feel (gross) drops actually forming in my armpits, the next minute so cold im shaking and need to grab my duvet. Is this normal? I don't remember feeling this weird last time???
Also i'm going out tonight with a few girlfriends and plan on drinking alcohol... Im aware this is probably a very bad idea. But i'm still doing it. Does anyone have any experience with drinking when fasting? I'm obviously gonna be very careful and not drink much but i'm also worried about passing out as i've almost gone down a couple of times today. I was thinking of having a couple of energy tablets before I go out?
Thanks guys, any advice/tips on improving my energy levels/experiences of alcohol on fasting etc let me know
[Rant/Rave] Hope everyone's Friday was better than mine 🎉💀
/u/slimbakerbitch [5'8.5" | 135.0 | 19.94 | F24]
Created: Sat Oct 15 08:59:41 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57mejf/hope_everyones_friday_was_better_than_mine/
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http://imgur.com/Dj9G0Zp
[Other] Thoughts and prayers please.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Oct 15 08:33:23 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57mak8/thoughts_and_prayers_please/
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[deleted]
[Help] I suck at fasting. My life is going to shit around me, so today, and tomorrow, and for however long I can manage, I will not eat.
/u/Rikicarvu [5'8" | 109.2lbs | 16.36 | -20lbs | F]
Created: Sat Oct 15 08:15:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57m823/i_suck_at_fasting_my_life_is_going_to_shit_around/
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Anyone want to be fast buddies/group? We can keep each other updated and motivated. I don't want to be the first to crack!
[Discussion] TW dissecting the body of an obese woman (BBC documentary)
/u/fluorescentbunny [185cm | CW: 85.7kg | UGW: 66kg | BMI: 25 | -7.5kg | F | BED]
Created: Sat Oct 15 07:27:16 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57m1j0/tw_dissecting_the_body_of_an_obese_woman_bbc/
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I saw this posted on the loseit sub, and thought you guys would be interested as well. It is kind of gross, but also the reverse thinspo is through the roof. Don't watch this if you have a weak stomach though!!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RLu_hdlWUkI
[Discussion] What New Weird Habit Did You Discover
/u/eboneezah [169| Fat Cow | Not Yet There]
Created: Sat Oct 15 06:51:30 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57lwy8/what_new_weird_habit_did_you_discover/
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Based on another poster's post about how we seem to be dealing with the same habits, running around the same damn mountain for years at time, I wondered if anyone else found that when..your ED rears its head or goes into overdrive, you develop some non-food related habits and if so what are they?
**mine are these**: I suspect some other girls on here have this too, I become seriously OCD with cleaning, its as if I feel if Im in a clean space, my goals will become *easier* to achieve. Or I feel as if I deserve the progress because I am so clean..weird I know
I also begin sorting my clothes by colour, same with my shoes, so everything has a kind of gradient effect.
Someone please tell me Im not ~~mental~~ -.-
[Rant/Rave] Fckn habits
/u/teasnob22 [5'3" | CW: 95.7 | GW: 88 | 17.43 | -22 | F | Vegan AF]
Created: Sat Oct 15 06:10:50 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57ls6h/fckn_habits/
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I remember the times when binging was less of a daily occurrence and more of an occasional hazard. When I was actually making progress, instead of doing well for ~2 days just to throw it out the window for food that I don't even enjoy. When my face wasn't puffy and swollen constantly, and when I could actually go out on weekends because I didn't feel so nauseous from all the times I've filled up my stomach just to half-empty it over the toilet.
Jesus Christ, I thought those times were bad, but I would take them back in a heartbeat just to get out of this cycle.
[Discussion] 'Stupid Questions' Saturday! October 15, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Sat Oct 15 06:02:31 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57lr5g/stupid_questions_saturday_october_15_2016/
---
This is the weekly 'Stupid Questions' Saturday thread for October 15, 2016.
Use this thread as an opportunity to ask any questions you might have that you feel don't necessarily warrant their own post.
Please be wary of false advice and information. Be sure to research the facts before taking anyone's advice, no matter who they are. Remember that diagnosing members is unacceptable. **Anyone looking for medical guidance should seek the opinion of a medically licensed professional.**
*****
Have any questions or concerns? Comment below, or [PM the mods.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FproED)
Where do I go from here?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Oct 15 03:32:44 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57lddw/where_do_i_go_from_here/
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[deleted]
[Discussion] No one can really know what I'm thinking.
/u/High_as_red [5'4 | F]
Created: Sat Oct 15 02:37:29 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57l8ms/no_one_can_really_know_what_im_thinking/
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I used to feel really dirty when I thought about food. I'd plan a fast day and wake up, thinking about NOTHING other than food. Everything I saw I wanted to fucking devour. And I would FEEL like I have failed because I WANTED the food. But I came to realise that I will ALWAYS want Roast beef sandwiches. There won't come a day where they won't look like heaven. The trick is not- not to want it. But not to have it.
So on the inside I can be all like "OMG PIZZA HAMBURGER MILKSHAKE FUDGE PASTAAAAAAA" but in the outside I can pretend I never even think about food. And that's okay.
[Thinspo] fade music video thinspo
/u/wyydean [5'3| CW125lb | GW100lb | F]
Created: Sat Oct 15 02:33:52 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57l8bd/fade_music_video_thinspo/
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https://youtu.be/IxGvm6btP1A?t=1m50s
[Goal] Update on avoiding the scale for a week
/u/woollyshirt [5'7.7 | 116.4lbs | 17.69 | -77.6lbs | M/NB]
Created: Sat Oct 15 02:14:27 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57l6pk/update_on_avoiding_the_scale_for_a_week/
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Despite eating at a deficit continually, last saturday, water weight shot me up to 55.1kg. As of this morning, I have a new LW of 54.1kg! I feel so happy. I did not lose a kilo of fat in a week by eating at 1200/day but I've been plateauing and jumping around for a long time, so this was overdue!
I did end up weighing myself three times but by knowing that today was 'weigh in day' it was a lot easier to feel like I should discount what I saw...because it was generally around 55kg, and my range is 53-55kg, although I'm still yet to see under 54 🙄
Thank you to everyone on this sub who helped keep me at least a little bit sane this week 😍 It's certainly been interesting and if my weight is doing this in the future despite deficit then I'd definitely consider doing it again.
tl;dr: New LW and I'm thrilled!!
edit: last week's post about this [here!](https://www.reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56ltc1/im_avoiding_the_scale_until_next_saturday/)
[Rant/Rave] Irony
/u/PaisleyStars
Created: Sat Oct 15 01:50:29 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57l4lj/irony/
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Yesterday, my (lovely) fiance made an off hand comment that really upset me for some reason. At first, I was hugely offended that he would say such a thing and then I began to beat myself up about it. My self-esteem plummeted and I dealt with it by eating an enormous amount of comfort food. Binging is basically unheard of for me so I wound up throwing it all back up, first because I couldn't cope with the feeling of fullness and then because I was furious with myself.
This morning, I have woken up with makeup down my face and a slightly sheepish feeling. I do have to laugh at myself. The horrendously offensive comment that led me to my worst binge and purge session for a very long time in an attempt to out-eat my emotions? "I mean, you don't have the healthiest relationship with food."
No, dear. Probably not.
"You're really boney lately," - My brother last night
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Oct 15 01:12:42 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57l1b5/youre_really_boney_lately_my_brother_last_night/
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http://imgur.com/a/erKPC
[Thinspo] So I saw that you lovely people liked my thinspo pinterest board. And I know you're a fan of low cal foods :)
/u/KajaIsForeverAlone [height:5'9 | CW: 147 BMI:21 | weight lost:15 lbs | Gender: F]
Created: Sat Oct 15 00:59:38 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57l041/so_i_saw_that_you_lovely_people_liked_my_thinspo/
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http://pin.it/2-8RTlT
[Discussion] What's your go-to tea?
/u/Thefattestbutterfly
Created: Sat Oct 15 00:55:59 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57kzsc/whats_your_goto_tea/
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My go-to is Mango right now, because it doesn't make me nauseous, even if I haven't eaten for a while. You guys should seriously try it. It's not as appetite-reducing as the infamous green tea, but it works and I'm not puking my guts out afterwards.
My all-time favorite is mint. We are all out, but it's so good.
I used to drink a lot of Green Tea w/ peach, but that was back when I was eating at a much smaller deficit. It just makes me puke now.
What about you guys?
[Rant/Rave] Drunk rant
/u/rizzle_riz [5'4' | CW:141 | 24.89 | -18 | F]
Created: Fri Oct 14 23:27:56 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57kqvm/drunk_rant/
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I feel like a complete piece of shit. I binged after being 3 weeks clean and to top it all off i had almost an entire bottle of wine and a margarita.
DAE feel like they are unworthy of love? Tonight my roommates and I had a game night complete with drinks and dinner, except I was the only single one. Most of the time idc but tonight I just feel the extra burn being surrounded by the couples. It just feels like i'm not worthy of the same love because I'm an ugly fat piece of shit. Anyways i'm going to cry myself to sleep now, and sorry if i don't make sense I just had way to much to drink tonight and I'm really in my feelings.
[Meme/Humor] I never thought I would say "same" to a Shrek movie. (cant flair, mobile)
/u/AccaliaOmg [5'3 | 115 | 20.4 | -15 | F]
Created: Fri Oct 14 21:56:07 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57kg2k/i_never_thought_i_would_say_same_to_a_shrek_movie/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/2fb540ed7a5a4b1e897638ee49d1b269?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=7801a2bf8411c4f03cccdce352cbce85
[Rant/Rave] Binge/Purge
/u/xcris19x [5'3 | FATFATFAT | Fat | F| UGW: 100/105]
Created: Fri Oct 14 21:44:04 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57kej3/bingepurge/
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It's been a messy few couple of days. I bought out all the stuff for the lemonade master cleanse diet. I planned to start it yesterday, then today - because both days we've been dealing with an impending storm which means buying distilled water from the stores is much more difficult than it normally would be.
This has put a load of stress on me and started out as a simple one-day break in my fast. I had a super basic single meal less than 100 cal and felt like shit. The next day wasn't better, my wife surprised me with taco bell to make up for a small spat we'd gotten into. TB is my comfort/binge food. I couldn't say no because she meant well. I got like, three burritos and got high and ate all of them.
Today I went to make a quick grocery run to pick up kindling for the fireplace (on the offhanded chance the power goes out again and I want to use the fire to keep warm since it's really cold out) - and I bought with my eyes.
I bought-
* Pringles (1 can)
* Frosting (1 container, duncan hines, chocolate)
* Doritos (1 large bag, spicy sweet chili)
[AND]
* Pretzels (1 large bag, rold gold)
I don't know what I was thinking - I also bought a liter pepsi (not diet) and an aloe vera juice drink.
I ate half the frosting container, a good chunk of the pretzels and about ten or so pringles. I was in a serious mode of self-hatred and did something I haven't done in YEARS. My diagnosis is ana*, not mia. But every so often I can't help myself- I was feeling disgusting and gross and sick anyways. I dropped down on my knees, looked to my porcelain throne and lifted the lid- and then I did it. Without any fingers or toothbrush handles or anything. I just pushed up from my stomach and it all came pouring out. I think the only thing left inside is the pretzels because I ate those first. I still feel it in there but nothing else is coming up. I drank some aloe juice. I'm drinking an epsom salt lemon water- sucking down about a gallon of water, hating myself even more than before - but not because of purging, because I couldn't get the rest out.
Note: I threw away the frosting and pringles. I left the pretzels and doritos (because I didn't eat any of those) for my wife. If she doesn't eat them eventually they'll go stale and we will toss them anyways.
I'm super pissed I wasted my own money on junk that I threw up and out- but I'm more pissed I couldn't purge anymore than what I did.
Whatever. I needed to let this out.
Thanks for listening guys.
[Help] Help please!! I'm teetering on the verge of a binge
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Oct 14 21:27:20 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57kcf4/help_please_im_teetering_on_the_verge_of_a_binge/
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[deleted]
[Help] How do you count calories if you cook?
/u/selanfe
Created: Fri Oct 14 20:52:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57k7wn/how_do_you_count_calories_if_you_cook/
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I've been relapsing from the ED I thought I "recovered" from years ago, but my eating situation is super different from how it was the first time around and it's throwing me for some major loops. I'm married now, and my husband and I both love to cook. We're vegan, 90% plant-based whole foods, very low-oil diet, so I know that the foods I'm eating are nutritionally good. But whenever I try to count calories I don't know what to do. I have MFP, but when my husband cooks food I have no idea what all went into it. I don't want him to notice my relapse or he'll make me eat (he helped me recover the first time). How can I figure out how much I'm eating???
I just discovered this subreddit, so I hope this is ok to post here. I'm trying hard to balance this relapse and keep it from getting too bad by eating about 1k a day, but since I don't know what I'm getting when I eat food I didn't cook, I'm kind of afraid to eat it at all...
[Meme/Humor] A pie chart of me during a binge
/u/rukittenmerightnow
Created: Fri Oct 14 20:29:32 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57k4s8/a_pie_chart_of_me_during_a_binge/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/76ea27e3b0124378a88cee8a487ee106?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=013761cc257f49745c9c2f47092c2f56
[Rant/Rave] Six days...
/u/capture_the_excite
Created: Fri Oct 14 20:09:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57k230/six_days/
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... and then I purged. So much for never doing it again. -_-
Sipping on tea and trying to ignore that horrible post-purge jitter. :(
Should I eat a piece of pizza
/u/KajaIsForeverAlone [height:5'9 | CW: 147 BMI:21 | weight lost:15 lbs | Gender: F]
Created: Fri Oct 14 19:58:12 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57k0hk/should_i_eat_a_piece_of_pizza/
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[removed]
[Rant/Rave] I hate reactive hunger :(
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Oct 14 19:57:17 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57k0ci/i_hate_reactive_hunger/
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[deleted]
[Other] Today was pretty okay
/u/savetheexplosion [5'2 | fat | Female]
Created: Fri Oct 14 19:18:35 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57juy9/today_was_pretty_okay/
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So today I went shopping for work clothes. I grabbed my normal sizes in clothes and then for pants i also grabbed a size down as well.
I went into the changing room (least favourite part) and everything I tried on was too big! By a size or more! The skirt I tried was literally falling down. Kind of sad about the pants though as I had the smallest they had in stock (XL don't think I'm actually small at all lol) and they were weirdly baggy but so comfy. Today I also hit a new low weight. It was a pretty okay day if you ask me. Now just to keep it up.
[Discussion] Anyone want to share food rituals?
/u/Casablanca_Insomnia [5'3 | TOO MUCH | -21 | GW: 87 | F]
Created: Fri Oct 14 18:52:02 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57jr3v/anyone_want_to_share_food_rituals/
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I know this gets posted kind of a lot but its nice reading about other peoples quirks and obsessions - makes me feel a bit less odd! A few of mine are
* I am only allowed to eat after 1.00pm
* I have to use the same sets of cutlery to eat with. Same with whatever I use to cook my food - it has to be the same pots and pans every time.
* I buy a chocolate bar every week which I hide in a drawer in my room. I don't ever eat these, even if I'm in binge mode. Sometimes I'll throw them out if I'm afraid I will eat them though.
* At least 700 ml of water must be drunk in between meals.
* I hate eating in front of other people. I always have to hide in my room with something to watch.
* Meals must take me an hour to eat.
I'm particularity interested in the food hoarding thing, does anyone else do this?
[Help] I need help on how to lose my appetite again.
/u/MaMilkshake
Created: Fri Oct 14 18:30:32 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57jny7/i_need_help_on_how_to_lose_my_appetite_again/
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[removed]
Anyone here live in Utah?
/u/KajaIsForeverAlone [height:5'9 | CW: 147 BMI:21 | weight lost:15 lbs | Gender: F]
Created: Fri Oct 14 18:18:55 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57jm60/anyone_here_live_in_utah/
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[removed]
[Rant/Rave] My boyfriend's family is super nice...
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Oct 14 18:18:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57jm1i/my_boyfriends_family_is_super_nice/
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[deleted]
[Help] Fasting
/u/DenyMyHunger [5'7"| Fat! | UGW:112| F]
Created: Fri Oct 14 18:13:19 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57jlam/fasting/
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[removed]
[Help] Fuck Facebook
/u/LittlestBear [5'7 | CW: 145bs | GW: 100lbs |F]
Created: Fri Oct 14 18:10:01 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57jkr9/fuck_facebook/
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Guy who destroyed me emotionally and said he 'didn't know how to feel or love' or blah blah bullshit is now Facebook official with someone far prettier and skinnier than I am. Guess he did know how to feel after all :\ I've been doing so goddamn well with restricting and fasting and purging when I fuck up that I actually need to update my flair, but the universe just says NO sometimes and doesn't allow for happiness. I haven't had a cigarette in 12 years but I've been chugging whiskey and chainsmoking for the last 4 hours. The last time I went on a no-food-just-whiskey bender was because of this same douchebag and I am so tired of having to attribute my small weight losses to him.
Someone post some animals or something happy? Small victories? Justice porn stories about men who have done you wrong and gotten their karmic desserts?
[Other] Garbage- Bleed Like Me [Anorexia related lyrics in comments]
/u/Navelpudding [5' 6" | 180 | -70 | F]
Created: Fri Oct 14 16:37:03 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57j65h/garbage_bleed_like_me_anorexia_related_lyrics_in/
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ONgrSX47qYA
[Intro] left this sub for a while, never introduced myself when i was here but now im back [intro]
/u/leatherhoff [5"3 | TOO MUCH | ftm]
Created: Fri Oct 14 16:16:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57j2su/left_this_sub_for_a_while_never_introduced_myself/
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uhhhhhhh hi again. Dunno if people usually post their names in these intros but you can call me AJ. 17 year old trans guy
I'm? uh. I dunno if i have an official eating disorder but i sure as hell have an unhealthy relationship with food. either starving or binging (mostly the latter), recently started purging too but so far i havent done it much cos i dont have a lot of opportunity to not get caught.
Currently 5ft3, 123ish lbs (i binged these past two days and was previously at 121 so i dont know for certain now). Short and Pudgy and Horrible looking.
Fuck idk what to actually put on this im tired from really bad recent binges. i work at a chinese fast food place and i love chinese food and its a recipe for disaster
ironically i also love baking and cake design. it was my original career plan but im starting to reconsider because of ED stuff .....
I really struggle to fast because I have like no self control but next year I'm moving out, and im just straight up not gonna buy food at all so thats something for me to be excited for, hahaha. even though im probably gonna be moving in with friends. oh well
Anyways yeah. i was away for so long because i deleted the Reddit app off of my phone but im gonna reinstall it after i post this. i need to be back here because im just kind of struggling and its nice to be around people who understand
Progress stats... looking forward to Sunday when I take measurements again!
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Oct 14 16:14:11 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57j2bo/progress_stats_looking_forward_to_sunday_when_i/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/d4833bbfaa554b26bf1dd0af41f811a9?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=0d0fe0299182dccfa63a70ec056d5281
[Help] Theyre Ordering Pizza :(
/u/K_iwi
Created: Fri Oct 14 15:52:56 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57iyj8/theyre_ordering_pizza/
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God help me what do i doo. Theyve noticed i don't eat as much and theyre go na force me to eat some.
Please help :(
[Rant/Rave] I am not going to binge today.
/u/throwaway0908123 [5'7 | 120 | 18.73 | -17 | F]
Created: Fri Oct 14 15:49:32 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57ixzq/i_am_not_going_to_binge_today/
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Posting this here for accountability. I have two bags of mini Reese's cups sitting in my desk drawer right now. The bags are 360 calories each. I have already eaten half of one. I am going to eat less today and tomorrow to make up for the extra calories. I am absolutely NOT going to consume any more of them today. I will wait until tomorrow to finish the bag I already opened. I will NOT open the second bag until next week. I will NOT binge on Reese's cups. I will NOT be bossed around by a bag of candy.
[Rant/Rave] Post for accountability
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Oct 14 15:42:14 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57iwo6/post_for_accountability/
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[removed]
[Help] [Help] My roommate's boyfriend keeps talking about food all the time and I don't know if I'm overreacting
/u/voidnasp [153cm | CW 59kg | 26.44 | -8kg | F]
Created: Fri Oct 14 15:09:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57iqyh/help_my_roommates_boyfriend_keeps_talking_about/
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Sorry I hope this isn't too long...
It's been two weeks now that my roommate's boyfriend moved temporarily with us, until he finds a job and can have his own apartment. He was a friend of mine before even knowing my roommate, and knows I have/had issues with depression, self-harm and I think I talked about my ED before but I can't really remember. At that time I was recovering, but I started restricting again a few months before he moves here and, except for my boyfriend, nobody knows it.
He's really a nice guy but the problem is that I feel like he just talk about food ALL THE TIME. Like asking everyone what we want to eat, asking me how was yesterday's meal (that I didn't eat), asking me why I didn't eat that meal with its sauce, asking me if I want a muffin (a 488kcal muffin, that is almost equal to my daily intake) when I come home from work and half my body isn't even inside the apartment yet, asking me what I ate when I tell him I already ate something for dinner at 6pm (which is usually true because I usually have my dinner between 6pm and 7pm when I have one)... One night he cooked Cantonese rice for everyone and I didn't plan to eat it at first (mostly because I prefer my version of Cantonese rice), I got hungry a few hours later so I ate a small bowl... And he noticed it, told me "oh yeah I remember, you didn't eat some rice earlier!" and I just can't stand it. It drives me nuts and now I'm afraid to eat in my own home because I know someone is there watching what I eat, when I eat and reminding me that you're supposed to eat every single time.
I understood it was really affecting me when I decided to eat a bowl of cereal in my room rather than in the living room with everyone else. I never do this, i don't mind eating in front of my roommate and my boyfriend. But since her boyfriend is here, I just can't do it anymore.
I feel like he's talking about food all the time, but I don't know if it is because I focus a lot about food recently or if it really the case. I talked with my BF about it and he first thought I was overreacting but then started noticing that, as I come back from work around dinner time, I indeed only hear him talking about food, even tho he (of course) talks about other things than food. My roommate also admitted he often ask stupid questions when he's cooking. Plus I know it comes from a good intention and he just want to help at the apartment so he doesn't feel like a burden, but I can't help but kinda feel personally "attacked" here... My BF is thinking about telling him directly to stop talking about food with me, but I feel like this is not a good idea because maybe I never told him I have an ED so it's not really his fault because he doesn't know, plus I don't want anyone to know I relapsed (this guy once told my parents I cut myself when in a pure moment of weakness so I don't really trust him anymore on mental issues) and it would be way too evident to say it that way, and he really just want to be helpful and I'm the one fucked up here.
At least he's eating so much quantities of food it just stop me instantly to want to binge, but if I can't even it a 20g bowl of cereal in my home, what should I do? Should I tell him? Can I find a good excuse so he just stop talking about food? Or do I just have to get use to it because this is what normal people do and just get over it so no one can suspect I'm restricting again?
tl;dr : roommate's boyfriend constantly talks about food when it's dinner time (which is surely normal and I'm just fucked up) but it makes me uncomfortable. What can I do to avoid these conversations?
Edit : I forgot how to English + more details if needed
[Thinspo] This is my thinspo board on pinterest and I thought you guys might enjoy looking at it :3 (if this isn't allowed please tell me, I don't wanna be banned)
/u/KajaIsForeverAlone [height:5'9 | CW: 147 BMI:21 | weight lost:15 lbs | Gender: F]
Created: Fri Oct 14 15:05:01 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57iq1s/this_is_my_thinspo_board_on_pinterest_and_i/
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http://pin.it/5HV-cN-
[Goal] I just needed to tell someone! (NSV)
/u/soitwouldseemtoseem
Created: Fri Oct 14 14:49:25 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57in7u/i_just_needed_to_tell_someone_nsv/
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I completely fasted the last eight days to reach my goal weight, and I did. As of this morning, I'm five foot seven and one hundred pounds, and I don't think even that would have been enough to satisfy me except....
Well, I'm on my college's kickboxing team, which is co-ed, and knowing that my crush will see me two or three times a week in shorts and a tank top has really been great motivation. It was hell going to training while fasting because my energy was basically at 0, and today was a weird mixture of exhaustion (because fuck food) and mania (because goal!!) but I wound up fainting in the middle which would have been uber embarrassing except that
.... my crush has basically been fussing over me, he wanted to make sure I was alright and brought me home and insisted on cooking dinner. And he noticed how small I got! He called me delicate, and he was asking if everything was okay! And I know he already has a FWB/gf and that he probably thinks of me a someone to look after, to protect, but I'm just so happy that he's seen what I've become!! He mentioned that I'd lost a bit (a LOT) of muscle so he said we could go to strength training together if I wanted, which I don't, but still!!
[Discussion] Anybody tried Yokebe? Apparantly 273kcal and 32g of Protein...any other better meal replacements out there?
/u/Rikicarvu [5'8" | 109.2lbs | 16.36 | -20lbs | F]
Created: Fri Oct 14 14:40:24 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57ilim/anybody_tried_yokebe_apparantly_273kcal_and_32g/
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http://www.yokebe.co.uk/product
[Discussion] Motivation?
/u/KajaIsForeverAlone [height:5'9 | CW: 147 BMI:21 | weight lost:15 lbs | Gender: F]
Created: Fri Oct 14 14:39:02 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57ila8/motivation/
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Usually I have no problem going without food for weeks, but lately I've been eating lots. This morning I broke and ate a doughnut :P what motivates you to not eat?
[Discussion] DAE occasionaly get hit with the feeling that they're doing something terrible wrong?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Oct 14 14:34:31 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57ikfl/dae_occasionaly_get_hit_with_the_feeling_that/
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[deleted]
[Intro] Another intro from a lurker
/u/I_Like_Stingrays [5'5" | CW:128.8 | GW:120 | -29 | F]
Created: Fri Oct 14 14:18:01 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57ihb1/another_intro_from_a_lurker/
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Hi everyone, I've been here for about six months and almost made an intro post a few times. I don't really feel sick enough to be here, yet I am here and identify with so many of you, so who knows.
I've always been chubby and hated my body but was too addicted to food to do anything about it. And everyone said I looked "fine" anyway.
I've lost weight before cutting calories, but ended up gaining again on Taco Bell and ice cream. When I got engaged last year I was at my highest weight of 158. The pictures from that day make me want to throw up instead of being one of the happiest days of my life.
I finally started getting serious in March of this year for my wedding last month and figured hey, if eating at a deficit works then I should just not eat as much as possible. Hence my addiction to coffee, zero cal energy drinks, Bronkaid, and broccoli.
I thought I would stop at 135 but I now realize that I've always had body dysmorphia and an obsessive relationship with food and weight. I've just never had the self control to do anything about it. I get such a high from seeing the scale go down and getting compliments and knowing that it's a testament to my self control. Now that the wedding is over I don't have an expensive dress to fit into and I can keep losing instead of maintaining and feeling shitty about it.
I guess at some point I found this subreddit and now here we are. I'm so scared to post this because I feel like such a fraud and if I don't belong here you can tell me to leave. I just know I have a problem but I feel like I can't stop until I hit my goal weight. The problem is it keeps changing.
I just want to be delicate instead of looking in the mirror and hating myself.
About to binge :-)
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Oct 14 13:41:29 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57iagz/about_to_binge/
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[deleted]
[Tip] Having to start all over--how did you make a life style change that stuck?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Oct 14 13:26:16 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57i7lf/having_to_start_all_overhow_did_you_make_a_life/
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[deleted]
[Help] Where will I buy skinny jeans at my UGW? I will have tiny tiny proportions!
/u/realbutterflybaby [5'1" | CW: 118 GW: 88±1 | -13 lbs | F]
Created: Fri Oct 14 12:48:01 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57i07s/where_will_i_buy_skinny_jeans_at_my_ugw_i_will/
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I'm at 100 lbs now but have been able to fit into size zero at places like Ann Taylor and Aritzia since I was 110 lbs. This was really encouraging then but is actually worrying me a bit now. You see, I'm 5'1". By the end of October, I aim to be at 90 lbs. That'll be 20 lbs lighter than when I was a size zero at either of those stores. I want to buy a new pair of skinny jeans that actually fit me at 90 lbs, but am worried I won't be able to find sizes small enough anywhere.
To my not just thin, but overall very small girls... where would you buy jeans? Should I just start lurking the children's section or something? And where would you recommend?
[Rant/Rave] Weighing myself is too distressing but not weighing myself means I'm not motivated and I slip up, why am I like this??
/u/vuoen
Created: Fri Oct 14 12:36:33 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57hy2c/weighing_myself_is_too_distressing_but_not/
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AGH I hope someone else feels this omg
[Discussion] Anyone else annoyed by "Real Women Have Curves" movement?
/u/dontcareifithurts__ [5'4.5 | 117 | - 4.2 | F]
Created: Fri Oct 14 12:34:51 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57hxqv/anyone_else_annoyed_by_real_women_have_curves/
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Every time girls post something to Facebook saying "real women have curves" or "bones are for dogs" or something along those lines, I get so mad.
Curves does not equal fat.
Skinny people can have curves too. I'd know, my hip bones are f***ing massive.
I'm all for body positivity if it makes people happier but when it promotes obesity or shames skinny people, it drives me nuts. I feel like this is the only place on the internet I can say that and not get attacked. (Hopefully I'm not wrong about that)
Sorry for no flair, I'm on mobile.
[Other] good news for ontario
/u/gin-and-lemon [🐝 5'1"| cw: 150lbs | bmi: 29 | -15lbs | f]
Created: Fri Oct 14 12:31:06 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57hwzd/good_news_for_ontario/
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while at home for thanksgiving, i actually got good news! my mom said in ontario, starting in 2017, businesses (she runs a truck stop) have to start labeling the calories on homemade items, and apparently restaurants will have to do it too!
while this is only for "chain" type businesses (with 20+ locations), like loblaws or super pass stores or whatever, its gonna be nice to look at a bag of pre packed fruit and actually know exactly how many cals is in it without having to weigh it out myself.
(a quick google search agreed with her!
https://www.osler.com/en/resources/regulations/2015/what-s-cooking-new-ontario-menu-labelling-law-to )
[Rant/Rave] Why am I like this [rant]
/u/disbeetch [5'3'' | 140 | 23.7 | -34 | F]
Created: Fri Oct 14 12:26:56 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57hw65/why_am_i_like_this_rant/
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Last night I tried on a bunch of outfits to decide what to wear this weekend and for the first time I was so happy with how I looked in my clothes. My hips looked so small and I was just so proud of myself for all the progress I've made and how much self control I've had lately. And then I ate two pints of halo top. And made plans to stay in tonight and eat Thai food. Why do I sabotage myself like this?????
[Goal] My mom indeliberately motivated me today
/u/scandinaviandreams [6'0" | 131 | 17.93 | F]
Created: Fri Oct 14 12:23:01 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57hvdk/my_mom_indeliberately_motivated_me_today/
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This morning I failed pretty miserably at the gym. I just had zero energy and got the "This is gonna be a shitty binge and self loathing day"-feeling. But then my mom sent me a message with a picture of me and my son from exactly a year ago and it said "how fast time passes!"
I'm so fat in that picture. I can't remember my weight a year ago but I was in the overweight category for sure. Determined to never look like that again, I stuck to my calorie limit, and I'm about to hit the bed soon! Thanks mom.
[Rant/Rave] My emotions are weird
/u/Polski_lesbian [5'2.5 | 124.2 | 22.6 | Q]
Created: Fri Oct 14 11:09:06 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57hghf/my_emotions_are_weird/
---
My trip to London was cancelled at the last minute, which means I won't be able to see my crush until at least Christmas - and I won't be visiting London, of course. Yet the only thing I feel is relief, because I don't have to worry about having to eat things in front of her, or the friend I'd be travelling with for 9 hours.
You guys are the only ones I can share this with, everyone I know thinks I'm devastated :p
[Help] I have hit a plateau please help sos
/u/hh_lb
Created: Fri Oct 14 11:01:59 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57hf19/i_have_hit_a_plateau_please_help_sos/
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I restrict very consistently.. liiiike under 700 usually closer to 500 every single day. I'm not eating one shit meal either, it's mostly healthy stuff and I am stuck at my current weight. And I'm not underweight.. like I definitely can still lose. I take an EC stack everyday as well. I do not know what the problem is here but it's freaking me out. I haven't even been heavily restricting for a long period of time so it would be really concerning if it was an issue with my metabolism just adjusting to my calorie intake.
It's difficult for me to work out because I have low blood pressure and get syncope even standing up too quickly. But I feel like with restricting this much I should still be losing??
Please help me someone I am freaking OUT.
[Thinspo] Model Files AKA The best thinspo ever
/u/vuoen
Created: Fri Oct 14 10:38:35 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57haiq/model_files_aka_the_best_thinspo_ever/
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https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL61A7BC85EBF9454D
[Rant/Rave] Started Strattera for ADHD
/u/Alexa1p [5'5'' | 110 | 18 | -10.7 | F]
Created: Fri Oct 14 10:31:16 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57h92j/started_strattera_for_adhd/
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Two hours after taking it for the first time, I felt an overwhelming wave of nausea and had to run to the bathroom of my local coffee shop, where I spent 15 minutes shivering in a cold sweat while dry heaving into the toilet.
On the upside, I have no appetite, so that's a plus.
[Help] Your tips to tone up (especially abs)
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Oct 14 10:05:07 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57h3zd/your_tips_to_tone_up_especially_abs/
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[deleted]
[Discussion] Daily Food Diary! October 14, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Fri Oct 14 10:02:47 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57h3he/daily_food_diary_october_14_2016/
---
This is a daily food diary thread for October 14, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
[Thinspo] When the weekend temptations are upon me, I turn to Bella cuz I know she ain't eating! Some of my favorite pictures of her <3
/u/cry1000x [5'4" | 148.2 lbs | 25.4 | F]
Created: Fri Oct 14 09:30:21 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57gxcz/when_the_weekend_temptations_are_upon_me_i_turn/
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http://imgur.com/a/nVuTq
[Rant/Rave] Almost got help. Almost.
/u/InSkyLimitEra [5' 7.25" | HW 180 | CW 111 | LW 111 | 29 F]
Created: Fri Oct 14 09:21:11 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57gvoy/almost_got_help_almost/
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Ugh.
So, this week, my heart has been way too fast (I'm mildly confused as to why other anorectics get bradycardia when I'm constantly tachycardic as fuck). I've had resting heart rates of nearly 140 (normal is 60-100). I also had a near-fainting episode on Wednesday while visiting patients in the neuro ICU, which was very embarrassing.
I also get allergy shots every few weeks at the student health center at my school. Today was such a day. In the hour beforehand, even while sitting for a long time, my heart felt like it was pounding out of my chest, and still way too fast. When I got to the appointment for the shot and was waiting, I took my pulse and it was around 120-125ish. I thought "okay... this might be a good time to finally talk to someone medical about this. Now I have physical evidence of a problem instead of being told I'm too fat to need help."
The nurse called me in, and I pretty much immediately told him that my heart won't slow down. He asked me a couple questions about things that could cause it, all of which I (truthfully) denied. So I sit on the table and he starts listening to my heart. I put my finger on my carotid so I could feel what he was hearing.
...my pulse felt like it was probably fucking 80 or 90. It had been pounding for days, and way too fast. I was so humiliated. I wish I'd never said anything. I told him that I swear it has not been that slow all week. And even worse, I stayed for 20 minutes after the shot and it stayed basically the same (maybe 90-100) the whole time.
I was so close. I've been so afraid to go in. This feels like a sign (figuratively; I don't really believe in "signs" from the universe) that I shouldn't get help and I'm just a complainer and I'm too fat and eat too much (high restriction lately, like 900/day) to be sick. I do have an appointment with a primary care doctor in a week or two, though it's supposed to be pre-op for a surgery I'm getting in November. I was going to bring it up then, but now I'm not so sure.
I just want to curl up into a ball and cry.
[Other] 22 binge-free days
/u/Laricia [5'4" | 108 | -2 | GW 95 | F]
Created: Fri Oct 14 08:45:59 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57gpcv/22_bingefree_days/
---
And I'm back at day 0. I try very hard not to beat myself up but this calls for a fast, hold me accountable. It's true how much more compelled humans are to accomplish their goals when they hold off announcing it, but I really feel safe and also promising self-responsibility when you guys are the ones listening. Thank you.
Before and after photos whether it be a month or longer or under a month is what makes me more motivated! Anyone know where I can find a forum for that?! Much love HAALP
/u/1exiehope
Created: Fri Oct 14 08:32:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57gn5y/before_and_after_photos_whether_it_be_a_month_or/
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https://www.reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57gn5y/before_and_after_photos_whether_it_be_a_month_or/
[Other] some ramblings on my dinner with the in-laws, just needed to get it off my chest somewhere
/u/ppyeoreul-mudgosipeo [5'6 | 2 Days w/o Binge | BMI 26.9 | F]
Created: Fri Oct 14 07:15:51 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57gad3/some_ramblings_on_my_dinner_with_the_inlaws_just/
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**TLDR:** I hate my MIL
After feeling like a doofus for thinking the dinner with my in-laws was Wednesday when it was actually Thursday, and thus stressing about it for two whole days instead of one, I made it through. I consumed more calories than I'd normally have in two days, so I'm less than thrilled, but it's behind me. She served my plate, like I knew she would, and gave me way too much, like I knew she would. Pasta *and* garlic bread, basically my worst nightmare. Only fatty (Ranch) or gross (ff Thousand Island) salad dressings, so I got stuck with a light strawberry vinaigrette that was waaaaay way too sweet to be enjoyable even under regular circumstances.
And then there was goddamn *dessert*, which was tasty, but unnecessary. And she sent some home with us, which of course we ate before we went to bed. And she sent *more* food home with us, like she thinks my fridge is bare. I'm not going to eat anything she sent home with us, because I don't need to. I've got my own food, thankyouverymuch.
I hate going over there because MIL treats me like a child. I suppose from an outsider's perspective she'd seem like a regular overbusy Midwestern woman, but I know her better than that. She's a narcissist and to her nothing is worth it unless she's the center of the conversation. She is Always Right^(TM). I hate seeing my SO's dad get ground down under her heel. He's a super cool guy, but not very...strong? for lack of a better word. He just absolutely *wilts* when she talks over him. It makes me sad.
The best? worst? part of these visits with my in-laws is that MIL is *fat.* Like, FAT fat. I don't know her height and I couldn't begin to guess her weight, but she's shaped like Oogie Boogie from TNBC. I'm not exaggerating-- I wish I were. She doesn't have a fupa somehow, but her belly is huge and round and her butt is somehow big and flat at the same time. She looks like someone stuck legs and a head onto a pumpkin.
She is my ultimate reverse-thinspo. And she invites us over for dinner. And serves me fat-lady portions. I wholeheartedly believe she wants to see me balloon up to her size in time, because in her mind, it's an inevitability for all women to get fat when they age. Not me. When we go back at Thanksgiving (*god no please no let me get out of it, it's not the holiday or even the food it's just HER*) I'll show her. I can probably lose ten pounds by then. Screw her.
[Discussion] Twin Sisters "Take Sibling Rivalry To The Next Level"
/u/eboneezah [169| Fat Cow | Not Yet There]
Created: Fri Oct 14 07:03:34 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57g8e7/twin_sisters_take_sibling_rivalry_to_the_next/
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D4RsiYteyos
[Rant/Rave] (RANT) My friend is such a shitty person.
/u/Fit4me123
Created: Fri Oct 14 06:49:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57g6b6/rant_my_friend_is_such_a_shitty_person/
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So last night I hung out with some old friends at a bar. It was super fun until like halfway through the night when they got hungry and ordered pizza. No big deal! I had been drinking at this point so I wasn't even hungry and I was able to say no thanks I didn't want any, I'm trying to lose weight. Now I'm fat guys. I'm obese. Me wanting to lose weight shouldn't raise any alarms with anyone. But my one friend was like "well that's stupid who cares. Just eat one piece, you're hungry, you're. Body is fine, be happy with what you have." Stuff like that. Then by the end of the night she was complaining because she has to wear a size 5 at hollister but she's still a zero at target!!!!Also how she only weighs 115lbs which I know for a fact she absolutely does not. The worst part is, I know she had an eating disorder in high school and I feel like she's trying to sabotage me so I don't get as skinny as her. I'm just so annoyed about the whole situation.
[Discussion] Weekly Selfie, Progress Pic and OOTD Thread! October 14, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Fri Oct 14 06:03:17 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57fzfg/weekly_selfie_progress_pic_and_ootd_thread/
---
This is the weekly picture thread for October 14, 2016.
Feel free to share your selfies, progress pics or outfit-of-the-day (OOTD) pics in this thread!
**Rules**
1. Be nice, **or you will be banned.**
2. Please use [imgur](http://imgur.com/) as a host.
Consider adding commentary on featured brands, sizing, inspiration behind your OOTD (trying to look thin or cover up weightloss, etc.)!
**Remember that anyone can view the contents of this thread even if they are banned from this subreddit. If you receive unwanted messages, please contact the mods with a screenshot of the relevant messages. Note that even if we ban people, they can still message you, and they still have access to the contents of this subreddit. The best thing for you to do is to block them.**
*****
Selfie, progress pic and OOTD threads are posted every Friday.
Have any questions or concerns? Comment below, or [PM the mods.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FproED)
[Thinspo] Helmut Newton thinspo#3
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Oct 14 05:51:13 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57fxui/helmut_newton_thinspo3/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/f647686e7a114f9980d204863996c403?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=1adb0e356552d012b261a648749921a8
[Thinspo] Helmut Newton thinspo#2
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Oct 14 05:49:31 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57fxnc/helmut_newton_thinspo2/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/7ed39c04cd75468884392dd0539b72c5?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=880b42dc9a13a3798479f2196bee6ac7
[Thinspo] Helmut Newton thinspo#1
/u/qwertyldn
Created: Fri Oct 14 05:48:50 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57fxk3/helmut_newton_thinspo1/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/0306ec4be0034239b3eca5d9ad2a651f?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=ffb2f2be45c19fca14c94df1b7fc7dcb
[Thinspo] Helmut Newton thinspo#3
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Oct 14 05:47:52 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57fxfx/helmut_newton_thinspo3/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/6ad2258e7c134255a024a0eb60f16378?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=5955f22a7997ea1c3fbf24753dfe72d5
[Thinspo] Helmut Newton thinspo#2
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Oct 14 05:47:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57fxcr/helmut_newton_thinspo2/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/beaeaddf65e245859877d5698fe7a648?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=c545266a189643f9dd147f0a5bb9db5c
[Thinspo] Helmut Newton thinspo#1
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Oct 14 05:46:17 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57fx95/helmut_newton_thinspo1/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/a6a09995610c41a982d2f750d7b55022?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=c317bb865b2f716a54f19351b99f9d8c
[Thinspo] Helmut Newton thinspo#2
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Oct 14 05:46:12 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57fx8t/helmut_newton_thinspo2/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/610c60ab1bbe427a90257cf3e8227d90?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=cb64687ffa5aa9b651b683277c3dab87
[Meme/Humor] When the scale shows a slight gain and it's the worst day of your life
/u/morose_adipose [5'2 | 90 lbs | 17.05 | F]
Created: Fri Oct 14 05:24:52 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57fura/when_the_scale_shows_a_slight_gain_and_its_the/
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https://i.redd.it/l62o6xd5dfrx.jpg
[Other] 3lbs down this week... feel disgusting, but it's progress <3
/u/feelingpeakyy [5'3 | 95lbs | 16.7 | F]
Created: Fri Oct 14 03:47:20 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57fkdn/3lbs_down_this_week_feel_disgusting_but_its/
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https://i.redd.it/h1r9mkhrverx.jpg
[Discussion] drug use...
/u/skinnylove73 [5'10 | 125 | 17.49 | -15 | F]
Created: Fri Oct 14 02:10:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57fboo/drug_use/
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what drugs do you all use/if any?
sometimes i use cocaine and i always end up using 2 lbs. that day. makes me want to use it all the time but i know i cannot.
i take a CBD pill to sleep to avoid the munchies.
anyone else use any drugs - not prescribed?
[Thinspo] frail beauty
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Oct 14 01:20:18 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57f6y9/frail_beauty/
---
https://i.redd.it/pwxhybcq5erx.png
[Discussion] DAE have small night time binges?
/u/concuidado [4'11 | 83 lbs | 17.8 | -62| F]
Created: Fri Oct 14 00:59:22 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57f4t2/dae_have_small_night_time_binges/
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I finally reached my ugw but I feel weird about it because I'm still not happy with how I look, but I feel like I should just maintain rn rather than lose because a lot of people are starting to notice. And because I made that decision to maintain, when I get hungry at night I'm like "I can eat more now bc I can't gain with my daily 500 calorie intake" but then I end up binging like 200 calories on low cal foods. I know I can't gain on this but I don't want to go back to b&p like I used to and I feel that one of these small binges might eventually lead to that.
I also hate the feeling of just binging out and having to re adjust my days just because I'm losing more control.
I know this is a lot in one post lol but does anyone else deal with this?
[Rant/Rave] Not a cry for help.
/u/lordCanti08 [71 inchs | 205 | 28 | 180 | male]
Created: Fri Oct 14 00:38:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57f2sj/not_a_cry_for_help/
---
Have you ever felt like you don't want to KYS but you just wish you did not exist? I feel like something is wrong with me inside or out and it would be better for all people involved in my life if i just did not exist. I feel like a burden to my family, a guilt trip to the only woman i care about, and a drain to the few friends i have left.
I look at the post here and i see women struggling with body issues and ED (which i share both) and and it gives me motivation to continue to do what i have to do. The woman couldn't/wouldn't tell me what I am lacking that made her stop wanting to date me. So my only choice is to look at myself to find the thing that is deficient in me. I look and all i see is nothing. It is not hard to see why no one would want to be with me. I will focus my actions on the things i can change and double my efforts.
p.s. if this is not allowed sorry. i just needed to vent. I dont have anyone else to tell.
[Discussion] Trying to understand
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Oct 13 23:43:06 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57ewnx/trying_to_understand/
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[deleted]
What are your favorite <300 calorie meals?
/u/IAMABaguetteAMA [5'6" | 106 lbs | 17.0 | 11 lbs | F]
Created: Thu Oct 13 22:34:34 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57eofd/what_are_your_favorite_300_calorie_meals/
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https://www.reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57eofd/what_are_your_favorite_300_calorie_meals/
[Discussion] Is anyone else losing weight in order to appear more androgynous?
/u/theraindropsx46 [165 cm | 60kg | GW: 45kg | M]
Created: Thu Oct 13 22:14:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57elv1/is_anyone_else_losing_weight_in_order_to_appear/
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Hi, hello, this is my first post here. So yeah, what the title says?
Personally, I'm trans (ftm) so it's definitely motivated by this, especially since I'm poor as fuck and literally can't afford surgery & hormones :/
I actually tried to make myself fatter earlier this year in the hopes that it would diminish the feminine aspects of my body, but that backfired miserably, and I've since lost 5 kg from my highest weight of 65 kg. Hoping to get to a low enough weight to stop menstruation, at least as a temporary measure.
(I should say that I've never actually been diagnosed with an eating disorder, but I do have an unhealthy relationship with food & weight, as well as what might be perceived as an unhealthy goal that would be out of place on a normal weight loss sub, so I hope you guys don't mind me posting here! Seems like a really nice and supportive community, and I obviously can't talk to anyone in real life about these things.)
[Help] Help! Can't drink water cause it makes my nausea worse
/u/lightfeathers [5'4" | CW 112 | GW 95 | F]
Created: Thu Oct 13 21:21:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57ee9h/help_cant_drink_water_cause_it_makes_my_nausea/
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What do I do? :( I take a ton of meds that make me feel nauseous. They give me stomachaches and headaches as well. So eating and drinking is hard to do.
i've figured out that knee high socks always boost my confidence about my legs ❤️
/u/lordjoji [5'3" | CW: 101 lbs | 18.39 | GW: 100 lbs | F]
Created: Thu Oct 13 21:16:14 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57edkd/ive_figured_out_that_knee_high_socks_always_boost/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/524b5384c8c84753bc01592a9483b1ca?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=da456c0985128a5c5f682c55467d9ab5
[Discussion] Avoiding calorie numbers?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Oct 13 21:08:10 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57ecdj/avoiding_calorie_numbers/
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[deleted]
[Intro] Hello, I've lurked for a bit so I think it's time to introduce myself!
/u/epasternack [5'7" | CW 127 | GW 120 | BMI 19.9 | -33lbs | 22 F]
Created: Thu Oct 13 20:56:36 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57eamp/hello_ive_lurked_for_a_bit_so_i_think_its_time_to/
---
Hi all. Not sure if anyone will see this post but I wanted to say hi. I find it really inspiring to know that there's lots of people out in the universe who feel similarly antagonistic in their relationship with eating as I do. All of my friends (wow all three of them lol) are really big into eating or are trying to eat more to bulk so I feel rather alone on my quest to lose weight.
For as long as I can remember, I have totally hated my body, and I used to stress eat a lot in order to deal with anxiety and crazy family stuff. But then about two years ago I had an awakening and I've lost a bit since then. Now it's a race to lose the final 13 lbs, but I've already lost 27 lbs, so I try to keep that in mind.
I want to thank everyone here for being positive and honest, as it keeps me real with myself. Since I feel so isolated in the weight loss process, I wanted to reach out to the community as a whole, and also to any individuals who feel they might want a buddy to text with to help keep them on track. I know I could use a friend to text when I'm feeling particularly deranged.
Thanks again and nice to meet you all officially.
[Thinspo] Daily Thinspo.
/u/BlackGirlSteeze
Created: Thu Oct 13 20:46:59 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57e99k/daily_thinspo/
---
https://i.reddituploads.com/e36ad3c42235420ba88b6b30ae18ada1?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=03c3f37bf0ab8ee10ff6e8ddc97fee2a
[Rant/Rave] Just wanted to say thank you <3
/u/onlyroom_forthin [5'6 | CW:149.6 | 24.24 | SW:165 | UGW:120 | F]
Created: Thu Oct 13 18:59:48 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57dsmr/just_wanted_to_say_thank_you_3/
---
I rarely post anything anywhere on my regular account because Reddit can be so hostile and I take internet meanies way too seriously, but within like two weeks of posting here you guys have been so incredibly helpful and supportive. I don't think I've read a single negative comment from anyone. I was afraid to post because I'm so not skinny and so far from my goal weight, but when I posted about being a normal BMI I got this huge outpouring of support from you all. So I just wanted to say thanks to all of you for being so lovely and wonderful in the face of all the shit you all deal with every day <3 <3 <3
Side note, this post is likely stemming from the fact that I ate <500 calories today and am rounding out my intake with several glasses of wine, but whatever! I love you all!
[Rant/Rave] meds causing weight gain
/u/tartansheep [5'10 | 143lb|20.3 | -13lb| F]
Created: Thu Oct 13 18:21:36 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57dmn3/meds_causing_weight_gain/
---
fucking seroquel. thanks bipolar. wish i had no appetite. i keep binging. fml! stats more or less right think im about 147.
i need to stop the meds.. i cant be this fat
[Rant/Rave] Having to wear thick clothes for winter makes me feel terrible
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Oct 13 17:43:48 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57dgdr/having_to_wear_thick_clothes_for_winter_makes_me/
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It's triggering that part of my brain that wants me to cut myself. I don't want to wear a thick cardigan. I look huge and other girls look cute and dainty in their scarves and boots. :((
[Thinspo] if only I could be this graceful
/u/archerofdawn [154cm | CW 157 | GW 88 | -7 | NB]
Created: Thu Oct 13 17:01:28 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57d96k/if_only_i_could_be_this_graceful/
---
http://i.imgur.com/1hJAYMP.jpg
[Help] What's a good inexpensive food scale?
/u/shortleggedbeastie [5'2" | 156.5 | 29.65 | -28 | 20F | GW 100]
Created: Thu Oct 13 16:47:22 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57d6r3/whats_a_good_inexpensive_food_scale/
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hello guys and gals and nonbinary pals! i've been wanting a food scale for a while and i see them sometimes at thrift stores which remind me that i want one but i don't really trust those because someone got rid of it for a reason lol
preferably one's i can find online but any good suggestions are appreciated!
[Other] Anyone want to share their lock/home screen? c:
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Oct 13 16:20:55 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57d22h/anyone_want_to_share_their_lockhome_screen_c/
---
https://imgur.com/a/Hg3HA
[Discussion] My strongest/most shameful trigger
/u/vuoen
Created: Thu Oct 13 15:43:28 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57cvcl/my_strongestmost_shameful_trigger/
---
(I'm on mobile so I can't flair) I don't know if anyone else in a relationship or with a crush gets this, but I've been with my boyfriend for years now and all his exes are really thin. One has an eating disorder like I do, but she's *actually* skinny. I know it's fucked up but nothing motivates me to starve like this does. Ultimate thinspo.
edit: spelling
[Discussion] When the universe steps in...
/u/chipmunknutter [5'10"| CW | 21.2 | maintenance | F]
Created: Thu Oct 13 15:20:18 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57cr06/when_the_universe_steps_in/
---
TMI! I've been shitting straight up liquid for 4 days now. It's awful. No interest in food let alone my usual weekend C&S. Perhaps the universe is helping me out, could this be the week I stop doing that crap. I honestly laugh thinking this could be what works to break the habit or at least force me to experience a Friday that I don't do it and realize it's not all that I fear. How has the universe stepped in for you?
[Goal] Squashed a craving for beer-battered cod with another cup of coffee and half a protein bar
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Oct 13 15:00:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57cn5s/squashed_a_craving_for_beerbattered_cod_with/
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[deleted]
[Discussion] Vegetable Drive-Thrus, tho?
/u/Alexa1p [5'5'' | 110 | 18 | -10.7 | F]
Created: Thu Oct 13 14:55:55 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57cm89/vegetable_drivethrus_tho/
---
If only there was a drive through where they sold cooked vegetables. I end up stopping and getting shit-tier, calorically dense fast food so often just because it saves time, even when I'd prefer to eat healthily.
I would absolutely buy that. <3
[Discussion] Restricting making anxiety and depression worse?
/u/hazelconner [5'4" | 174.5 | 33.2% BF | -15.5 | X/F]
Created: Thu Oct 13 14:55:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57cm7d/restricting_making_anxiety_and_depression_worse/
---
I went until 1:45 today on just 300 calories and I felt more depressed and anxious than usual. I finally had a 400 calorie lunch and felt better emotionally. Not great. But less lethargic despair.
Ugh why mood? Why do this? I'm trying to feel accomplished by not being fat anymore!
(Mobile can't flair)
[Rant/Rave] Shout out to everyone that fought the urge to binge today. And to those that didn't: tomorrow is a new day, a fresh start and A STRONGER YOU! ❤️💕🎀
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Oct 13 14:54:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57clv8/shout_out_to_everyone_that_fought_the_urge_to/
---
[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] I feel so disgusting.
/u/lilialley
Created: Thu Oct 13 14:53:34 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57clr2/i_feel_so_disgusting/
---
I planned for 400 today. I ended up eating 800, TWICE as much as I planned, and I'm still hungry. It hurts.
[Other] A tiny bit of hope
/u/Missy_Is_Bitter [5'3"| 179.2.0 | -36.8lbs | F]
Created: Thu Oct 13 14:51:34 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57clbr/a_tiny_bit_of_hope/
---
No flair cause mobile.
The last few weeks have been really super hard on me. Like I don't feel like I'm doing well in school. I feel like my boss hates me all of a sudden. I feel like I'm a burden on my fiancé. I'm stressed and depressed and actively self harming and suicidal. Ive been on the verge of a panic attack all morning because I said something confrontational about my abusive ex on a post he (and others who actively despise me and love to talk shit about me) could see. I've eaten every day for the past week and am super disappointed in myself.
But I looked in the mirror a little bit ago and felt like I was still making progress. I'm still a fucking lardbeast. I still jiggle. The scars from hurting myself are probably never going to go away. But right below my ribs there is this fantastic adorable curve that gives me hope. Like I'm still huge and that probably won't change for a really long time, but it makes me feel like I'm still making progress and like I'll someday have a prominent ribcage and like I can be tiny if I work at it.
تحميل افضل برنامج لتسريع نقل الملفات Ultracopier
/u/ahmedeldon1
Created: Thu Oct 13 14:39:07 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57ciyf/تحميل_افضل_برنامج_لتسريع_نقل_الملفات_ultracopier/
---
http://bramjon.blogspot.com.eg/2016/10/ultracopier.html
[Goal] Just keep swimming 🐠🐠🐠 (June-> October)
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Oct 13 14:31:38 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57chfm/just_keep_swimming_june_october/
---
https://i.reddituploads.com/420c5b7337664b869e57663bc2997bf3?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=51da556ea92ff41e64297759fca6dcbb
[Help] I'm soooooo sick - at home alone with all the ED goodies I bought last night.
/u/mckenziemudkip [5'2 | CW:109(-21) GW:88 | BMI 20.45| F/20]
Created: Thu Oct 13 13:03:38 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57c0aq/im_soooooo_sick_at_home_alone_with_all_the_ed/
---
I have the flu guys.. just started feeling extra shitty this morning, so I didn't go to work. I've been home alone with all the yummy low cal stuff I got last night. I don't really feel bingey, per se, but just that I want to TRY EVERYTHING lol
I've been really good staying under 800 calories a day. Even with my binges, I usually make sure I'm under or not over 900. So I don't want to mess it up by being home alone and bored-eating.
On top of that, my SO doesn't get home for another half an hour, and will most likely be going to the OKC Thunder game we planned tonight without me, since I'm a sicky butt. So he'll be gone until midnightish.. even more time to eat with 0 judgement. Ugh.
(Also, anyone not in the US, or people in the US that don't pay attention to sports, OKC Thunder is a basketball team? lol)
Part of me just wants to get ready and go so I'm not alone with food, but the other part of me wants my boyfriend to bring a friend and have fun, instead of dragging me around. Ya know?
Any suggestions or advice?
[Other] Body check 10/13 124 lbs
/u/frailraven [5'10 | CW 117 | LW 115 | F20]
Created: Thu Oct 13 12:55:14 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57byn2/body_check_1013_124_lbs/
---
http://i.imgur.com/K8KUoys.jpg
[Goal] the tiniest i've ever been, long way to get back to it :-(
/u/wanskie [5'5 | cw: 135 | bmi: 22.5 | F]
Created: Thu Oct 13 12:45:45 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57bwrw/the_tiniest_ive_ever_been_long_way_to_get_back_to/
---
http://imgur.com/a/l7K5Z
[Rant/Rave] I think I'm relapsing
/u/ana-wrecks-ya [5'8 | 89lbs | 13.39 | -15 lbs | F]
Created: Thu Oct 13 12:33:53 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57buhn/i_think_im_relapsing/
---
Hello,
I think I'm relapsing back into my anorexia after going into treatment in February. I've started missing meals and snacks this week and the meals I do eat are much smaller than they should be.
I thought that I would be happier being healthy, but I'm not, I'm still miserable and depressed.
I just can't decide if I should keep trying to eat healthy and push down the urges or if I should just let myself slip back into my anorexia. I hate this, I just want to die and leave a pretty, skinny corpse.
Ignore my stats, those were before going into treatment. I have no idea what I weigh now, but I'm above 130lbs
[Discussion] Why does coffee make you less hungry?
/u/hunterxgreen [5'4'' | too much | ditto | -22 | F | ]
Created: Thu Oct 13 12:31:33 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57btzz/why_does_coffee_make_you_less_hungry/
---
I'm on mobile right now but I'll flair this once I get the chance. But how does coffee make all cravings and hunger go away so well? I don't understand. It's like magic. Like bottled will power.
[Rant/Rave] I think my ED is starting to get out of hand.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Oct 13 12:20:15 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57brsx/i_think_my_ed_is_starting_to_get_out_of_hand/
---
[deleted]
[Help] Feeling weird and headachy when restricting.
/u/fattynomnoms [67.5|192|29.48|-38]
Created: Thu Oct 13 12:18:03 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57brdw/feeling_weird_and_headachy_when_restricting/
---
I've been restricting to between 400-1000 calories for what's going on ten days now. I'm stating to feel weird, for lack of a better term. Not too sick or anything, but tired and mildly headachy. Anyone else feel like this while doing the same? How do you combat it?
If it makes any difference, I've been closer to 500/day for the past 5 days.
[Other] i actually can not understand when people are nice to me, a novel by me.
/u/ikillsouls [5' 2" | 106 | 19.4 | Ugw: 85 |19f]
Created: Thu Oct 13 12:17:05 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57br7x/i_actually_can_not_understand_when_people_are/
---
so I get to the library at school today and i sit at a table to do some studying. This guy sitting near me smiled at me and i seriously thought, ok... hes probably smiling at someone else don't look dumb. then he got up to go get some candy and he came up to me and gave me one of the two that he got.. i'm literally so confused but i said thank you. the second he left i start thinking.... he gave me one to make fun of my weight... or probably bc he thinks i have no friends and it's out of pity. My brain can literally can not understand someone just being nice to me lmfao. sorry for the dumb post just wanted to say it to someone 😂
[Rant/Rave] Foiled by a headache.
/u/smokesanddietcokes [Adipose Industries]
Created: Thu Oct 13 11:58:20 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57bni6/foiled_by_a_headache/
---
Fantastic week. No binging. No overeating. Restricting well within my limits all week. Still not hungry.. then BAM, headache. A really, really horrible one. I tried some miso soup, and then an electrolyte drink, but nothing doing. Despite not being hungry, I knew the only way to take the edge off was to eat (at least I really thought so).... aaaanndd now I'm up to 800kcal. 300 over my Thursday limit. Not hunger, just trying to chase off this headache. Thankfully, my last snack seemed to have hit the spot and it's easing off now.
Goddamnit though. Pft.
[Goal] Non weight goal
/u/ED2134 [168cm | fat | female| -10kg]
Created: Thu Oct 13 11:23:39 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57bgns/non_weight_goal/
---
two month ago i was barely able to go for a 2km walk without getting out of breath. today i went for a 5 km walk and it was fun and not a problem at all!
[Help] I think my marriage ended last night.
/u/bitsybones [5'2 | 140 | 25.6 | 137 | F]
Created: Thu Oct 13 11:21:56 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57bgaj/i_think_my_marriage_ended_last_night/
---
TW for abuse. I'm on mobile, so I can't flair. Sorry.
My husband, (who I've been married to for 3 months, together for 6 years) forcefully grabbed me by my wrists last night. He's been extremely controlling and manipulative the past few months, but I never thought it would get physical. I'm too afraid to keep moving forward in this relationship because there is the possibility that the abuse could get even worse.
Anyway, I'm staying with my parents today and tonight and I'm seriously fighting the urge to binge. My parents house is full of sweets that are irresistible to me. Essentially, I'd like some words of encouragement to not binge and also I'm not an idiot for wanting to get out of this relationship.
[Rant/Rave] (Rant) as much as I like my stomach being upset these cramps are gonna kill me
/u/thinkthinlythrowaway
Created: Thu Oct 13 11:14:45 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57bet8/rant_as_much_as_i_like_my_stomach_being_upset/
---
So I'm not sure if it was drinking a shit ton this weekend and then having McDonald's twice and butter pumpkin seeds that has caused my stomach pain. Or the fact that I haven't really eaten anything but on Tuesday two cities and yesterday roasted Brussel sprouts. But my stomach is killing me.
In the not good kinda good way. The way that I can deny food because it leads to me being sick but also to where my stomach has cramped so much my abs literally spasm when I sit up or move.
I have no energy today.
I don't know what to do.
At least I can sleep in tomorrow although I have a super midterm tomorrow so I'll probably stay up late and get up early to do studying I haven't done.
And midterm Monday and Tuesday so I should probably study this weekend.
I just really want it to be a break. Or next May when I graduate...
[Help] Has anyone in the UK actually been able to get hold of an EC stack?
/u/notthinohno [161cm |125.2lbs | 22.45 | - 51lbs | F]
Created: Thu Oct 13 11:08:47 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57bdl5/has_anyone_in_the_uk_actually_been_able_to_get/
---
I've been going mental for 2 days googling things about it but i just can't get any of the information straight in my head. What should I be looking for?
[Thinspo] In recognition of 3 days of light eating - here's some thinspo! (I think?)
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Oct 13 10:51:18 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57ba2o/in_recognition_of_3_days_of_light_eating_heres/
---
https://imgur.com/a/K7ZHH
[Discussion] The upside of having absolutely no friends
/u/cry1000x [5'4" | 148.2 lbs | 25.4 | F]
Created: Thu Oct 13 10:14:17 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57b2wt/the_upside_of_having_absolutely_no_friends/
---
No chance of getting invited out for unplanned food! I tell myself this when no one responds to my texts...
[Discussion] Daily Food Diary! October 13, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Thu Oct 13 10:02:30 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57b0hq/daily_food_diary_october_13_2016/
---
This is a daily food diary thread for October 13, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
[Tip] New fave low-cal supplement
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Oct 13 09:57:31 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57azhg/new_fave_lowcal_supplement/
---
[deleted]
[Help] Slow resting heart rate..?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Oct 13 09:39:47 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57aw4p/slow_resting_heart_rate/
---
[deleted]
[Thinspo] Another girl another planet thinspo #3
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Oct 13 09:33:51 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57auzv/another_girl_another_planet_thinspo_3/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/c4ed9655c3164a3685917b2dbd73236d?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=2fccb9f28a9c3af306f2b5aa33a699b1
[Thinspo] Another girl another planet thinspo #4
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Oct 13 09:32:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57aurk/another_girl_another_planet_thinspo_4/
---
https://i.reddituploads.com/f208d95d70f44b8999e6383ba011652a?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=83370d6232a07ed28b8b9f3fa39b659e
[Thinspo] Another girl another planet thinspo #2
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Oct 13 09:32:21 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57auow/another_girl_another_planet_thinspo_2/
---
https://i.reddituploads.com/69a67df0dad74218828db520623f3def?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=05a9fdda94a510bc778885deacadb92c
[Thinspo] Another girl another planet thinspo #1
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Oct 13 09:31:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57aum2/another_girl_another_planet_thinspo_1/
---
https://i.reddituploads.com/81835db6eb114631865f6563efedfc58?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=cb10907de2794dafe9eccd4ee3ebc512
[Discussion] I need a wallpaper
/u/kickkkasss [5'5 | CW:134 | GW:110 | F]
Created: Thu Oct 13 09:31:52 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57aulz/i_need_a_wallpaper/
---
Show me your thinspo wallpapers and phone backgrounds! I've recently gotten out of a relationship so im need of new backgrounds lol.
Can't flair mobile sorry
[Tip] [168 cal dinner] Big Plate of Chinese Style Kelp Noodles (ingredients & nutrition in comments) [x-post /r/1200isplenty]
/u/lyxil [5' 0"| 93 lb | 19.13 | -47 | f]
Created: Thu Oct 13 09:15:11 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57argo/168_cal_dinner_big_plate_of_chinese_style_kelp/
---
http://i.imgur.com/3lxElZw.jpg
[Help] Why I don't loose weight?
/u/K46
Created: Thu Oct 13 09:07:50 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57aq2z/why_i_dont_loose_weight/
---
[removed]
[Other] Would anyone like to see me attempt the infamous chocolate mono?
/u/daeboo [5ft1/80lbs]
Created: Thu Oct 13 08:44:12 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57almz/would_anyone_like_to_see_me_attempt_the_infamous/
---
The chocolate mono, source of controversy and bullshit since the beginning of ED forum time. I've found very few accounts of people trying it and frankly they all smell faintly of bullshit.
As a lifelong chocolate addict I volunteer to donate my body to science and will attempt a four day chocolate only diet, either approaching Halloween or with an excess of post- halloween sales chocolate. Would anyone be interested in seeing my results? Has anyone had experience with mono diets?
EDIT: [Here](http://www.myproana.com/index.php/blog/6922-mono-dieting/) is a link to a myproana user who has posted extensively on mono diets. Its my primary source of research on chocolate mono, sketchy as it may be.
[Rant/Rave] Ruined a Fast, Starting Over
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Oct 13 08:38:37 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57akn9/ruined_a_fast_starting_over/
---
[deleted]
تحميل برنامج تغيير الوان الصور
/u/ahmedeldon1
Created: Thu Oct 13 08:23:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57ahzk/تحميل_برنامج_تغيير_الوان_الصور/
---
http://bramjon.blogspot.com.eg/2016/10/pixlr.html
[Tip] Isometric exercises!
/u/bougainvilleas [5'5.5" | 99-104?? | GW 89]
Created: Thu Oct 13 08:07:21 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57af4r/isometric_exercises/
---
They're my favorite thing to do in the morning when getting ready, when bored at work (in the bathroom or some other private office space), when watching tv at night, etc.
This is a good resource: http://greatist.com/move/isometric-exercises
Obviously the caloric burn isn't anything as high as in cardio or weight-lifting, but the strength-training and muscle-building definitely do pay off. Very easy and low-commitment.
[Help] Question about medications
/u/hazelconner [5'4" | 174.5 | 33.2% BF | -15.5 | X/F]
Created: Thu Oct 13 08:02:36 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57ae9q/question_about_medications/
---
I've been on the same anti-depressant anti-anxiety for a while - 5 years. And I'm wondering if maybe it's become less effective. It definitely concerns me. Has this happened to anyone?
[Meme/Humor] I hit 166.6 this morning and burst out laughing
/u/ppyeoreul-mudgosipeo [5'6 | 2 Days w/o Binge | BMI 26.9 | F]
Created: Thu Oct 13 07:45:23 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57abem/i_hit_1666_this_morning_and_burst_out_laughing/
---
https://66.media.tumblr.com/0afdc057ff62f3242dde90ba2bd64b86/tumblr_oeydrckSpU1ug5jowo1_500.jpg
[Rant/Rave] I restricted for a dress for a wedding and now I have to wear a coat
/u/pinotblanc [5'3 | GW:115 | 23.2 | -23 | F]
Created: Thu Oct 13 06:57:13 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57a3qx/i_restricted_for_a_dress_for_a_wedding_and_now_i/
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I need to rant. All month it's been 90°. Tomorrow it will be 80°.
I've been restricting to go to this wedding so everyone i haven't seen in 6 months can see how skinny I've gotten and how pretty I look. The 1 day I need it to be 80° it's 40° and overcast and 80% chance of rain. Just today. Not yesterday not the rest of the week.
The wedding is outside and will be filled with people I don't like. I needed today. I lost 20 pounds for today. I'm actually *surprised* how good i look in my dress. I don't want to wear a coat. Coats make you look bulky and chunky. No one can see how much weight I've lost if i wear a coat. I might carry my coat and just say I'm not cold and that's why I'm not wearing it.
I realize I sound selfish and whiney. I was just so excited to have more people (especially ones that I don't like) comment, or at least see, on how much weight I've lost and how skinny I look.
[Discussion] Weekly Emotional Support October 13, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Thu Oct 13 06:02:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/579vpc/weekly_emotional_support_october_13_2016/
---
We're almost all dealing with quite stressful things outside of our eating disorders. Whether it be complicated relationships, friends, university, work or other mental illnesses like depression, anxiety or OCD, we all seem to be having a rougher time emotionally and mentally than the general population.
Use this thread to post about your problems or ask for advice concerning things other than EDs/ED behaviors.
**As always, follow the sub rules when reading or posting.**
*****
Weekly emotional well-being and support threads are posted every Thursday.
Have any questions or concerns? Comment below, or [PM the mods.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FproED)
شرح كيفية عمل صندوق الاعجاب على مدونات بلوجر
/u/ahmedeldon1
Created: Thu Oct 13 04:59:30 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/579nxa/شرح_كيفية_عمل_صندوق_الاعجاب_على_مدونات_بلوجر/
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http://bramjon.blogspot.com.eg/2016/10/blog-post_77.html
[Thinspo] Popped to Tate Modern before lectures and picked up this beaut full of pop punk thinspo - il post pics from inside later. I have a plethora of art books at home from Klein to LaChapelle to Man Ray etc il start posting thinspo from them soon so we can all get our art on! 💕🎀
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Oct 13 04:47:38 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/579mnf/popped_to_tate_modern_before_lectures_and_picked/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/6f5f167689184880b4ec59475c21c210?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=90e3a9e86b2ad55906c294f707c3b662
تحميل تطبيق Google Allo للدردشة الصوتية والكتابية
/u/ahmedeldon1
Created: Thu Oct 13 04:37:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/579llm/تحميل_تطبيق_google_allo_للدردشة_الصوتية_والكتابية/
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http://bramjon.blogspot.com.eg/2016/10/google-allo.html
[Goal] Yippie for GW
/u/Miss_Embie [5'6" | 130 | 20.9 | -22| F]
Created: Thu Oct 13 04:30:53 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/579kwc/yippie_for_gw/
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I finally reached my gw, the same weight I was before being put on steroids for asthma but now I see this gw being too high for me so I've now got a new lower gw yay.
[Thinspo] Made a multi. Thought I'd share it with you... Any suggestions for subs to add to my collection?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Oct 13 02:51:16 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/579b9q/made_a_multi_thought_id_share_it_with_you_any/
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https://www.reddit.com/user/Skinnytw/m/thin
[Goal] Day Three!
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Oct 13 02:25:50 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5798xw/day_three/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/a2bb11a4d9da403f8c31cf47b457db5b?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=b21ca8d68adfc710328c6144ed9dd40d
[Rant/Rave] didnt binge at a "carbs themed bday party"
/u/jrste310 [5 ft | 106 lb | 21.34 | -21.5| Female]
Created: Thu Oct 13 01:12:05 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5791w5/didnt_binge_at_a_carbs_themed_bday_party/
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i made cookies, did the cheese platters and all i ate was 6 grapes, 2 almonds a tomato, and a spoonful of salsa. normally cookies are the death of me but didnt even bring one to the br to c/s. came home made 2 egg whites, half a chicken sausage and to the gym in the am
[Discussion] Has anyone ever walked in on you purging? 😳
/u/rukittenmerightnow
Created: Thu Oct 13 00:34:06 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/578xy8/has_anyone_ever_walked_in_on_you_purging/
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https://www.reddit.com/r/proED/comments/578xy8/has_anyone_ever_walked_in_on_you_purging/
[Discussion] Fasting to get over my food addiction
/u/chimichanga_mischief [5"4 | 155 | 27.1 | F]
Created: Wed Oct 12 23:08:23 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/578nqo/fasting_to_get_over_my_food_addiction/
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The last few weeks I've just been constantly binging and eating like crazy, on top of that it was just Canadian Thanksgiving so the binging was even more than usual (seriously, who decided to have a holiday centred around binging on comfort foods?!?).
Anyway lately I've felt completely out of control and addicted to food. How I act around food is so single-minded and pathological. I am so focused on eating that I eat way past the point of enjoyment. On top of that I always tell myself during a binge that I'll purge as much of it as I can afterwards, and lately I haven't even been able to bring myself to purge. As a result I've become the heaviest I've ever been and I feel absolutely disgusting.
With that being said, I feel like the way to cure my addiction is the way I'd cure an addiction to drugs and alcohol. I'm going to spend a few days fasting, ideally for 3 days. I feel like the more I eat junk food the more I crave it. So I'm hoping this will help to reset my eating patterns a bit.
[Rant/Rave] I think my ED is starting to get out of control
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Oct 12 23:03:16 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/578n0r/i_think_my_ed_is_starting_to_get_out_of_control/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] Does it ever end?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Oct 12 23:00:21 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/578mlj/does_it_ever_end/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] Rant about boys and stupid stuff. [rant] [flair]
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Oct 12 22:56:48 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/578m6i/rant_about_boys_and_stupid_stuff_rant_flair/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] I went to a cider tasting dinner tonight and it wasn't awful!
/u/pungentthrowaway [5'1" | CW: 154 | -13 | F]
Created: Wed Oct 12 22:35:52 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/578jkd/i_went_to_a_cider_tasting_dinner_tonight_and_it/
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It was 5 courses with a full size hard cider with each course. I didn't finish any of the plates, I didn't finish any of the ciders, and I'm not drunk! That means I won't have my ceremonial hangover binge tomorrow because hangovers are my #1 binge trigger. I've been successfully restricting for a week now and I don't feel like this is going to throw me off and that's such a big deal for me. I wanted to share with people that will understand :D
I hope you're all doing well <3
[Meme/Humor] Something to watch, if you're bored-- Starved: Sam is a neurotic commitment-phobic stock broker recovering from compulsive overeating; Adam is a bulimic NYPD cop; Dan, who works as a writer, is an overweight compulsive-eater; and Billie is an anorexic/bulimic and aspiring singer/songwriter
/u/Noroeste [5'6 | can fit in a rowboat | F]
Created: Wed Oct 12 22:30:45 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/578iwy/something_to_watch_if_youre_bored_starved_sam_is/
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Cz5uu1SAtqI
Yes, this exists. Burn your fat with me interactive app
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Oct 12 21:45:25 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/578coi/yes_this_exists_burn_your_fat_with_me_interactive/
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https://imgur.com/gallery/mp7uP
[Discussion] Do you guys ever have IRL thinspos that continue after you become lighter than them?
/u/IAMABaguetteAMA [5'6" | 106 lbs | 17.0 | 11 lbs | F]
Created: Wed Oct 12 21:39:55 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/578bx9/do_you_guys_ever_have_irl_thinspos_that_continue/
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My friend is gorgeous, runs XC, she's 5'5" and about 110. Today I realized I'm an inch taller than her and 5 lbs less, but I still feel so fat compared to her
recovered but not ready to
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Oct 12 21:26:29 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/578a0k/recovered_but_not_ready_to/
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[removed]
[Thinspo] Lolol an unfortunate source of thinspo
/u/fckk [5'4| CW 120lbs | 20.60 | GW 115 | F]
Created: Wed Oct 12 21:24:31 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5789qf/lolol_an_unfortunate_source_of_thinspo/
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I was watching the new Amanda Knox documentary on netflix earlier and while it was super emotional, heavy, devastating, and generally appalling, I couldn't stop thinking, "them collarbones tho".
In that pink shirt! Designed JUST to show collar bones. And positioned under that intense lighting for the interview!
I skipped lunch and told myself it was because my stomach was "upset from how upsetting the doc was" but....it was because of her amazing, sad sad, amazing collar bones.
[Rant/Rave] can't stop won't stop
/u/archerofdawn [154cm | CW 157 | GW 88 | -7 | NB]
Created: Wed Oct 12 21:21:22 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5789ac/cant_stop_wont_stop/
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you'd think i'd know by now to not buy trigger food, and yet,
[Help] Please help, I've gone on a terrible eating rampage.
/u/Casablanca_Insomnia [5'3 | TOO MUCH | -21 | GW: 87 | F]
Created: Wed Oct 12 21:07:22 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57877u/please_help_ive_gone_on_a_terrible_eating_rampage/
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For the past week or so I have had no control over what I put in my mouth - it's just been binge after binge. I feel constantly ravenous, no matter how much I consume! I've gained 3kg over the week and it feels terrible, I can feel all the flabs in my stomach and it makes me want to puke. Any suggestions as to how I can get back on track. I feel so out of control right now :(
Another picture of me at my low weight, only 10 more lbs to go!
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Oct 12 20:48:01 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57849g/another_picture_of_me_at_my_low_weight_only_10/
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http://i.imgur.com/temTnJh.jpg
Another one of me at low weight, 10 more pounds to go!!
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Oct 12 20:46:15 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5783zn/another_one_of_me_at_low_weight_10_more_pounds_to/
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http://i.imgur.com/k408gcu.jpg
[Other] I think I need to take some time off from my ED.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Oct 12 20:43:04 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5783jk/i_think_i_need_to_take_some_time_off_from_my_ed/
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[deleted]
[Thinspo] My low key thinspo phone wallpaper
/u/The_Marshmallow_Test [5'5 | CW:dont weigh :3| GW:skinny arms| F]
Created: Wed Oct 12 20:37:31 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5782ou/my_low_key_thinspo_phone_wallpaper/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/41b19e7660244bf6abc07b38bd630420?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=0f36ae673d7f18af6888561f84be54a1
[Rant/Rave] Cheecha Puffs!
/u/xtabbithax
Created: Wed Oct 12 20:31:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5781q1/cheecha_puffs/
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After reading about them on here, I picked up a bag of the triple cheese flavour. Holy mother of snacks, Im in love!
Thanks for enlightening me!
[Help] Thin documentary - can someone who owns the book help?
/u/IWillBeAnACup [5' 6" | 165lbs | F]
Created: Wed Oct 12 20:18:47 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/577zu4/thin_documentary_can_someone_who_owns_the_book/
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I know this is super-specific, but maybe someone can help me. I'm looking for the page in the Thin documentary's book about Ata, containing an interview with her where she says "I was never very good at anything, but I knew I was a good anorexic". If anyone has the book, could they be so kind as to take a pic of this page and post it? I'd be so grateful!
[Discussion] jealousy when others lose weight
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Oct 12 20:17:13 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/577zm5/jealousy_when_others_lose_weight/
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I'm new here so forgive me my terrible writing :) I feel so selfish and awful because whenever others lose weight I'm overwhelmed with jealousy. Today, I found out my sister has lost 10 pounds and I feel so insecure about it. She's thirty pounds more than me at the same height so I don't understand why.... I know I shouldn't be, it doesn't affect my weight. I feel so bad about it, does anyone else have this experience?
[Rant/Rave] post-binge plan
/u/lllbt
Created: Wed Oct 12 20:13:49 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/577z2y/postbinge_plan/
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I was doing well today and I don't know why but tonight I decided to chew and spit because I wanted to taste but not swallow food...
So i ended up chewing and spitting some candy, and afterwards looked up online the benefits/downsides of chewing and spitting and decided to stop because i got paranoid about consuming calories from chewing.
I don't know why but afterwards the craving to actually swallow food came and I ended up eating a couple handfuls of milk candy, and a packet of Trolli candy.
I stopped this binge right in its tracks though!
I'm still guilty and consumed like 600 calories with this binge but tomorrow I'm planning on burning 600 cals at the gym and having a maximum of 500 cals tomorrow.
i HATE night binges -____-
[Help] How do I stop these stomach pains?
/u/sisternature [5'2 | CW: 108 | SW: 119 | UGW: 105 | F]
Created: Wed Oct 12 20:09:44 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/577ye2/how_do_i_stop_these_stomach_pains/
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(On mobile cant flair) The first time I ate today was at 2:30pm (had a slice of pizza which was about 230 calories). Then the second time I ate was about an hour ago. I started getting stomach pains about 20 minutes before my last meal, and by the time I was out of class and ready to eat my stomach hurt so bad that I couldnt. This has happened a couple times before and every single time: its horrible. I am in agony as I write this post. The pain is so bad. I managed to get down a bowl of cereal but my stomach still hurts very bad. I feel like I am going to throw up and thinking about food (even looking at the word pizza) makes me get insanely uneasy. My question for you guys is: How do you make yourself feel better? What can I do/eat/drink to help? I have Tums and antiacid on hand but thats it. Please help <3
[Rant/Rave] Dried fruit..
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Oct 12 19:43:25 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/577u4b/dried_fruit/
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[deleted]
[Help] Ephedrine question
/u/lesbichan [5'4" | 156 | -15 | F]
Created: Wed Oct 12 19:12:13 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/577p4s/ephedrine_question/
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Sorry for no flair, I'm on mobile :( do they sell bronkaid or primatene at cvs in the us? And do you have to be 18?
[Tip] Big bowl o soup for under 200 calories
/u/c_marier [5'6"| 113.4| 18.3 | -13 | 22F]
Created: Wed Oct 12 18:39:32 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/577jtf/big_bowl_o_soup_for_under_200_calories/
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Thought: we should have a recipe tag.
Back on topic: egg drop soup! Boil two cups of water with two bullion cubes (10 cal), add frozen veggies (20-50 cal depending on how much). Whisk two eggs (150) in a separate bowl and then once the broth is boiling again, pour the eggs in while whisking the broth so that the eggs turn into ribbons. Voila! Unless you pour a shit ton of veggies in, the grand total is about 180. And even if you do splurge on veggies, it's still just cresting 200.
[Discussion] How are you still gaining weight with no food in the house?
/u/CowOffTheFarm [65" | 145 | 24.41 | - | F | GW 120]
Created: Wed Oct 12 18:21:31 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/577gvt/how_are_you_still_gaining_weight_with_no_food_in/
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I'm poking at the chewed pizza crust I couldn't bear to swallow.
DAE *not* struggle with restricting and instead has to hide their binges?
Does anybody here attend VT?
[Thinspo] Daily Thinspo.
/u/BlackGirlSteeze
Created: Wed Oct 12 18:04:45 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/577e3v/daily_thinspo/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/c939838c9e0a48188b1a927a1d77e0a0?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=e2957e4c8432d1bde9c901949b886700
[Intro] Welcome post? Welcome to....this college student's pantry!
/u/neuro-fuzzy [5'6.3| CW: 115 ☹ | BMI: ??? | LW 98 | GW 108 | 20F]
Created: Wed Oct 12 17:31:31 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5778rc/welcome_post_welcome_tothis_college_students/
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http://imgur.com/XATMweu
[Discussion] Juice fast/cleanse/whatever?
/u/dontcareifithurts__ [5'4.5 | 117 | - 4.2 | F]
Created: Wed Oct 12 17:15:31 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57762l/juice_fastcleansewhatever/
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Sorry guys I've only ever posted on mobile and I'm a n00b so I have no idea how to flair a post. Anyways.
When PMSing, I crave sweets so bad.. its all I think about. I get extremely grumpy and irritable if I don't have any, so when I'm eating a seriously calorie restricted diet AND PMSing, I am basically a monster.
I'm considering doing a jucie fast (is that the right term?) Where I don't eat, I just drink juices/smoothies.
Have any of you done this before? I don't have a juicer so I'm looking for the cleanest healthiest juice brands I can get to avoid too much added sugar and calories, but still get the nutrients I need.
Any advice? Is it a bad idea? Will I poo constantly? Lol...
[Rant/Rave] today i discovered my college caf has 100 cal ice cream in the vegan fridge!
/u/lordjoji [5'3" | CW: 101 lbs | 18.39 | GW: 100 lbs | F]
Created: Wed Oct 12 17:11:16 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5775bq/today_i_discovered_my_college_caf_has_100_cal_ice/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/2c05ef4df430422aa2b8b3a830a649e3?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=a5a547cc0a1142dd758d5465ee48b679
[Goal] First day restricting since I went to treatment :o
/u/star-of-morning [5'1" | no clue | went to treatment | send help]
Created: Wed Oct 12 17:10:14 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/577553/first_day_restricting_since_i_went_to_treatment_o/
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Follow up to [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54yxut/im_backkind_of_recoveryrelated_delete_if_not/) post.
I'm not restricting heavily or anything like that. So far I've had 429 calories and will probably add another ~300 for dinner with my girlfriend. So roughly 750 (800 tops) today. Right now, it's unbelievable that I used to eat 0-500 on a daily basis. I guess my body is just *so* used to being nourished and eating 6 times a day since June.
Part of me really hates myself and feels guilty for restricting because I spent so much time and effort and money recovering, only to be back with an eating disorder mindset. And I met the love of my life while in treatment and I would never want her doing what I'm doing right now. I would never want her to go back to her eating disorder. I have these horrible intrusive thoughts that I could break up with her at anytime if I *really* wanted to, and go back to my eating disorder. Go back to eating nothing with no consequences.
Sigh. Right now, I do have a consequence for getting "too sick" - I could possibly lose my girlfriend. Hopefully that reminder keeps me from going off the deep end.
[Discussion] Self sabotage through food and not exercising...
/u/Olligale [5'4 | 122 | BMI | GW: 109 | F]
Created: Wed Oct 12 15:35:25 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/576o6d/self_sabotage_through_food_and_not_exercising/
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So, does anyone do this? For about two months now I have woken up every single day and I have really felt like running. Everyday I have the opportunity to not eat, but when I get home, I just eat and eat even when I actively do not want to. Why do I do this? It's the weirdest thing ever.
[Discussion] restricting vs. working out
/u/texas_native [5'6" | 118 | 19.05 | F]
Created: Wed Oct 12 15:35:23 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/576o6b/restricting_vs_working_out/
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curious what you all think about restricting, vs eating more and working it off. i go through phases where i'm comfortable not working out but eating fewer cals, and sometimes eating a little more but having to work out enough to make a major dent in what i consumed. currently in the latter half of that. so i'll eat ~800, work off ~300, and call it a day around 500. not even sure if that really adds up scientifically. curious what you all think, do you factor your exercise into your total daily intake? do you feel better / safer doing one over the other?
[Help] Ephedrine nasal drops (1%) and pro-plus?
/u/notthinohno [161cm |125.2lbs | 22.45 | - 51lbs | F]
Created: Wed Oct 12 15:31:16 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/576ne0/ephedrine_nasal_drops_1_and_proplus/
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Will this combination do anything for me? I'm in the UK so i'm trying to find a way to cobble together something resembling an EC stack - but i'm *such* a novice, it's embarrassing.
Any help would be gladly received - thanks.
[Discussion] Concerta vs. caffeine/brokaid?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Oct 12 15:26:05 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/576mi2/concerta_vs_caffeinebrokaid/
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[deleted]
[Discussion] Boyfriend wants to take me clothes shopping?
/u/dabriela [5'7 | fat | -43lbs | F]
Created: Wed Oct 12 14:59:55 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/576hmw/boyfriend_wants_to_take_me_clothes_shopping/
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So my birthday is next week and one of the things my boyfriend wants to do is take me shopping for new clothes (I don't blame him, I'm poor and don't have a lot of different clothes.) And as much as I would love to have new stuff to wear, we all know how awful going shopping can be, especially with someone else.
My weight has been back and forth in the past few months, gain 20lbs, lose 20lbs (but most recently gained, ugh) and I just don't feel comfortable doing it. He's not aware of my struggles with an eating disorder, but I told him I don't want to get new clothes because I don't feel comfortable with the way I look and he didn't think that was a good reason. Plus, why would I spend a bunch of money on clothes that might not fit me a month from now? I'd also feel suuuuuuuper guilty spending his money like that.
I'm not sure how to approach this. I don't want to outright say no, but I don't want to go shopping with him, even for a little while, and send myself into a panic attack. Any advice?
[Meme/Humor] Funny thought I had earlier...
/u/ditzydizz [5'2" | cw~142 gw~125 ugw~105 | -15 so far | f]
Created: Wed Oct 12 14:53:47 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/576gi1/funny_thought_i_had_earlier/
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Hi. I'm not new here, but my account is new. Long time lurker. I thought I'd start contributing to my favorite community <3
I had a funny little moment with myself earlier. I was talking to my boyfriend on the phone, and I let it slip that I purged earlier that week. He has struggled with eating, and knows about my issues with food (and everything, honestly). He made me promise I would never purge again. (He seems to have no issue with my binges, though. Hmmm...)
Anywho, he got really upset about it, and kept telling me how unhealthy it was. After we got off the phone, the thought popped in my head:
"I wish you could see how well I can binge food, I'm pretty good at it now."
It didn't hit me until a few seconds later how twisted that idea is, but it just made me laugh. :)
Have a lovely day, you beautiful people <3 Stay strong!
[Other] Body Check, 10/11, ??? lbs
/u/AccaliaOmg [5'3 | 115 | 20.4 | -15 | F]
Created: Wed Oct 12 14:52:41 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/576ga2/body_check_1011_lbs/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/a0bb35324076475f8da4eb10d2e5b494?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=1976d8196944bcb408e48f021322c954
[Help] Feeling compulsively that I must finish eating (ednos?)
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Oct 12 14:27:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/576bgj/feeling_compulsively_that_i_must_finish_eating/
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[deleted]
[Help] 10 pounds in 2 days??
/u/sossox
Created: Wed Oct 12 14:14:10 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5768wm/10_pounds_in_2_days/
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I weighed myself Monday morning and again just now (Wednesday evening) and I'm down about 10 pounds. I feel like this shouldn't be possible. I've been fasting since then but 10 pounds seems like a lot even with not eating. Wtf?
[Meme/Humor] ERMAHGERD you guys! Don't trust a wine fart!
/u/CowOffTheFarm [65" | 145 | 24.41 | - | F | GW 120]
Created: Wed Oct 12 13:45:14 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57635q/ermahgerd_you_guys_dont_trust_a_wine_fart/
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Stress + broke = binge drinking on an empty stomach.
Today was rough. I had to go to court and got in an argument with my S.O. I remembered I've been saving a bottle of champagne I bought on clearance for $8.18 'Nuff said.
Hopefully i'll puke before finishing this bottle and save myself some calories lolololololololol
Edit: I'm drunk! Apologizes if you don't find this as funny as I do. Maybe you just HAVE to find humor in lightly shitting yourself. My day is bad but could totally be worse. I love you, lovelies!
[Meme/Humor] Everything looks good on skinny.
/u/CowOffTheFarm [65" | 145 | 24.41 | - | F | GW 120]
Created: Wed Oct 12 13:35:50 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5761ba/everything_looks_good_on_skinny/
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http://imgur.com/gallery/x0fig
[Rant/Rave] caffeine pills aaaahhhh
/u/yikes_dot_com [5'6 | 111 | 17.9 | F]
Created: Wed Oct 12 13:32:04 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5760j9/caffeine_pills_aaaahhhh/
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(on mobile can't flair sorry)
so I am a very odd specimen of a human in that I really do not like the taste of coffee, tea, or any sort of variation of either. in fact I pretty much only drink water (and alcohol, lol). this was the case even before I developed my ed just because I've never been big on drinks. I drank soda sometimes in high school, but 2 years ago decided to quit cold turkey because it made me feel dehydrated and I have not ingested any form of caffeine since.
well, as you can imagine, restricting in addition to working out 5x a week with no caffeine or any other supplements has started to really take its toll, to the point where I'm so exhausted I can barely do simple things such as hold a conversation or walk from my dorm to my classes. so yesterday I picked up a bottle of caffeine pills (200mg and I think they're also infused with green tea?) at the convenience store and today after my workout I took one right before my shower, thinking it would kick in by the time I got out and I'd be able to power through some homework.
nope. in the shower I suddenly started feeling very lightheaded and had to quickly get out and run to my room. now I have never fainted before and I'm probably more scared of passing out than anything else. the loss of control of my body just realllyyyy freaks me out. so I run to my room and sit down and eat a 100cal bag of skinny pop (I have eaten very little this week and worked out every day so I thought that's why I felt lightheaded). I'm currently lying on my bed in the fetal position still feeling like absolute shit, lightheaded and shaky and just awful. fml and fuck caffeine I guess lol
edit: ate a granola bar for another 190cal. I'm such a fucking wuss lol but I would also love for you guys to weigh in on why the hell this happened?¿
[Goal] I'm going to fast until I'm no longer obese.
/u/almightylurker [5'1" | 163.2 | 30.8 | -51.8 | F]
Created: Wed Oct 12 13:31:37 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5760ga/im_going_to_fast_until_im_no_longer_obese/
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I currently weigh 173 at 5'1" and need to weigh 158 to be out of the obese range. I'm on day 2 and feeling good so far. I'm craving mac and cheese so hard but I have my goals in mind and can do this. I also figured posting it here would give me more motivation as I don't want to fail both me and you guys. Wish me luck <3
[Tip] EC stack tip for those starting out
/u/ifitmakesmehappy [5'5 | 125| -45| F]
Created: Wed Oct 12 12:30:59 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/575o39/ec_stack_tip_for_those_starting_out/
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I see a lot of you guys ask about EC stacks, I'm going to give you a really helpful tip! I started using EC stacks in January, but I went about it the dumb way. I used 3 doses a day and didn't even restrict as much as I am now. I could have definitely eaten less, but I was afraid that if I restricted too much I would end up binging, so I didn't.
3 times a day wore me out so quickly...I developed a tolerance, and felt like I needed the stack to just be able to function. I went off it after 2 months and it was AWFUL...I got a huge headache from caffeine withdrawal. Felt like I had no energy, ever.
I started up again with the stack 2 months ago after coming down from a binging phase this summer (15lbs lost so far!) but this time I'm doing it ~healthily~ (if we can even call it that, lol).
I'm only taking 1 tablet of bronkaid with my coffee (about 150 mg of caffeine) each morning, or before my workout, and that's it. I find that taking one dose is just as effective as taking 3 doses, with none of the bad side effects. I still get the nice appetite suppression and energy boost. Plus, my bronkaid pills last me longer, and I'm able to sleep more at night, too. Yay sleep! Ironically, I am actually restricting more now than back when I was taking the dosage three times a day.
I've been doing it like this for 8+ weeks now, and recently I had to go a couple of days without the stack for reasons outside my control. I was super worried that I would get withdrawals or that I would binge because my appetite would go out of control. Amazingly, none of that happened!!! I didn't get any headhaches, either. I just felt like a "normal" thin person who knows when they're hungry and when they're not, who can eat proper portions to lose weight and stop when she's full, etc. It felt good, actually. I wish it could always be like that, lol
Anyway, for those of you starting out, definitely start out with one dosage a day if you want to maximize the benefits and minimize the downsides. The EC stack is my lord and savior and I love it, but it's good to take as few health risks as possible when losing.
Hopefully this helps someone out there!
[Goal] I didn't binge last night before bed(!!!!)
/u/jippityjuniper [5'7" | 148 | 23.10 | -20 | F]
Created: Wed Oct 12 12:11:03 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/575k33/i_didnt_binge_last_night_before_bed/
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I've been stuck in a cycle of night-eating and taking food with me to bed to binge on before I sleep. It's probably been around three weeks of this bullshit and yesterday I was just feeling so shitty (currently sick with a head cold) that I went home and just went right to sleep. Sleeping isn't something I do so well so I always have about an hour of just laying down and hoping to fall asleep where I just battle obsessive thoughts about what could be in my fridge. Living with my parents doesn't help (anyone need a roommate? heh) as my mother loves buying "treats" as she calls them, which I ask her to hide from me (cause we both know I'll eat them all). Buuuuuuuut she usually doesn't, so they're always on the front of my mind.
But I fought the thoughts last night and I won! I wasn't insanely bloated this morning! It felt so amazing to wake up hungry. I missed that feeling. I even managed to keep my total calories under 800 yesterday due to no bed-binging. I did, however, get my period this morning so I'm currently bloated from that but at least I know that's not my own fault (technically).
If I can break the cycle, anyone can! My willpower is so low these days it's pretty nonexistent. I hope I can fight the thoughts tonight as well. Wishing everyone good thoughts and vibes this Wednesday. <3
[Other] Body check 10/9 at 126 lbs
/u/frailraven [5'10 | CW 117 | LW 115 | F20]
Created: Wed Oct 12 12:07:56 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/575jf3/body_check_109_at_126_lbs/
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http://i.imgur.com/2lLfELA.jpg
[Help] I have to talk to my therapist about my cigarette habit [help]
/u/disbeetch [5'3'' | 140 | 23.7 | -34 | F]
Created: Wed Oct 12 11:05:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5756p5/i_have_to_talk_to_my_therapist_about_my_cigarette/
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I really don't want to because I don't know how to explain it besides that it curbs hunger and I'm absolutely not going to talk to her about my ED (at least not yet). I told her about the smoking though and so we're gonna talk about it next session.... any advice?
[Discussion] Are you open about your ED?
/u/rukittenmerightnow
Created: Wed Oct 12 10:43:31 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/575256/are_you_open_about_your_ed/
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I do not tell people about my ED, and even my closest friends and family do not know. Sometimes, when I'm in a rut w/bulimia I'll make a Freudian slip and accidentally reference purging out of the blue. It's embarrassing because I'm afraid people will start to suspect something's a up. Also, I fast a lot, but thankfully nobody really seems to mind that.
Have a great day x
[Rant/Rave] Now my inner thighs!
/u/qwertyldn
Created: Wed Oct 12 10:36:49 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5750uq/now_my_inner_thighs/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/ff64880248154d109a8fa018b0c8d251?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=a1332dfca627f54bf69e074e6e6b6963
[Goal] Feeling pretty good about my collarbones today. Happy Yom Kippur btw!
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Oct 12 10:35:04 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5750ih/feeling_pretty_good_about_my_collarbones_today/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/b91036ce211f45259ada07c2307c9913?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=6f05837ea88b753aa6871e5a7d446321
[Help] Scared...
/u/capture_the_excite
Created: Wed Oct 12 10:32:02 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/574zvi/scared/
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I've been stuck in a b/p cycle for the last week. But last night I thought, the next time I b/p, I could *die* - and a part of me feels silly for thinking that, like it's overly dramatic. But I get dizzy and have palpitations after I purge. My eyes have those little red dots over them from the pressure of vomiting. The last couple of times I did it, there was a small amount of blood. I could tear something, or throw my electrolytes out of whack and have (another) cardiac event. I'm scared, and I really don't want to go back there. It's been two days since I purged and the concept of never doing it again feels overwhelming. I don't know if I can do it.
So I'm kind of stuck. If I eat, I purge and that's just not an option any more. I've still got one foot in recovery so I don't want to lose more than about 5lbs (except a part of me wants to lose about 20). Every food is a fear food, not because it will make me fat but because it will lead to a purge.
I feel like I'm going to be stuck in this cycle forever.
[Discussion] Daily Food Diary! October 12, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Wed Oct 12 10:02:43 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/574ty8/daily_food_diary_october_12_2016/
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This is a daily food diary thread for October 12, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
[Help] bloating
/u/lllbt
Created: Wed Oct 12 09:59:06 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/574t7o/bloating/
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Anyone have any advice for combatting bloating? I've been massaging my stomach, taking shots of apple cider vinegar and drinking water but today is the second day I've woken up feeling full of gas and looking puffy. I know its probably because I haven't had a bowel movement in some time -__- what do you guys do to help bloating?
[Rant/Rave] Having Cryogenic Lipolysis on my tummy guys! It's so cold!!!
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Oct 12 09:52:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/574s2q/having_cryogenic_lipolysis_on_my_tummy_guys_its/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/bbd81f8ff45144ce931fc1cb3284366b?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=4c41d06848878130903b62fcc3cc6e72
[Rant/Rave] Had to cut the night short with my guy because of food
/u/H2OandCaffeine [5ft7 | FAT | -20 lbs | F]
Created: Wed Oct 12 09:31:01 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/574nw5/had_to_cut_the_night_short_with_my_guy_because_of/
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We were out all day walking around the city, looking at the historic city buildings, hitting up this barcade, etc. We ate lunch when we got there and I was okay. I've been trying to be okay with eating for him while I see him. I'm visiting from a long distance and I don't want to complicate things with my food issues, as much as I can't control it.
So yeah. Lunch was okay I didn't eat too much. We went and walked around for a while and all was well. But dinner time came and my boy wanted to eat again and We went and got a burger and I ate it without the buns and only the meat and it hit me that I was about to be walking around this city with food sloshing around in my belly and people would see the fat rolling around. I felt like I would have thunderous steps and people would see me and know what a glutton I had been. For two meals that were smaller than what most people eat in a day. And I wanted to cry and purge and cut myself. But I couldn't let myself cry in public. I couldn't purge and disappoint him. And i am trying so hard not to cut myself. So I just had to sit there and live with it. :(
My guy wanted to go walk around more and waste time but I was freaking out and we had to uber back to his place before we could even finish our evening.
Just feels shitty that my food problems ruined not only mine but his evening as well. He was so understanding but I feel horrible about it. :(
[Goal] Hit 130!
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Oct 12 08:53:34 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/574gig/hit_130/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] [rant] I should be happy that I'm seeing my parents this weekend but my ED is getting in the way.
/u/twigsandbones [5'6 | cw; fat | 19.4 | 18f]
Created: Wed Oct 12 08:50:14 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/574fx1/rant_i_should_be_happy_that_im_seeing_my_parents/
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I moved to uni a few weeks ago and have always been close to my parents so I've brought a ticket to visit them for the weekend as I'm a little homesick. I know my mum has been missing me loads also so I think I cheered her up by telling her that I'm going to visit.
However my mum is already speaking about having pizza the day I get there and having a roast dinner which is freaking me out as I can barely eat 300 calories most days without feeling like I want to die.
I just feel really horrible and selfish as I want to please my parents and want them that I'm getting better from my ED and make them happy but at the same time, I'm getting sicker and sicker. I know alot of people don't get to see their parents so it makes me feel like shit that I'll be worried about how many calories I've consumed all the time I'm there.
I'm not looking for advice but I just needed to let it out
[Discussion] Help, how do I fake weigh in *MORE* than I am?
/u/nueroux [5'3 | CW: 108 | LW: 90 lbs | GW: 95 lbs| F]
Created: Wed Oct 12 08:39:51 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/574e1o/help_how_do_i_fake_weigh_in_more_than_i_am/
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LONG STORY SHORT.. My nutritionist has set up a meal plan for me (1600-1700 calories a day) for me to follow during my bulimia recovery. The only problem is, the more I eat = the worse my ED becomes. She wants me to gain weight, but there is no possible way that I will be able to do that w/o having a complete breakdown. I get weighed every time that I attend a session with her (usually 1x/week) and anytime my weight is lower than the previous session (even by a single lb.), she comments on it. So my question is how do I weigh in more than my actual weight? I was just thinking of layering clothes under a sweatshirt and sweatpants, but how much would that really add on? :( Thank you guys.
[Goal] Day 3 of 21.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Oct 12 08:33:33 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/574cwr/day_3_of_21/
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[deleted]
[Help] Green tea stomach ache
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Oct 12 08:13:32 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5749bc/green_tea_stomach_ache/
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[removed]
[Help] [help] Does anyone else get nauseous drinking tea on an empty stomach?
/u/descendingscales [5'7 | 165 | 25.75 | -45lbs | F]
Created: Wed Oct 12 08:08:44 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5748gz/help_does_anyone_else_get_nauseous_drinking_tea/
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Long story short, green tea used to be a huge staple of my restriction. I always have a warm drink in my hand, but I've noticed recently that if I drink any sort of tea (especially green tea) while fasting(especially after 8-10 hours) it almost always makes me vomit within half an hour.
Does this happen to anyone else? I love tea but I don't want to always add milk or sweetener or have to eat something with it.
[Help] Got cozened into a dinner with the in-laws - what should I do for lunch?
/u/ppyeoreul-mudgosipeo [5'6 | 2 Days w/o Binge | BMI 26.9 | F]
Created: Wed Oct 12 07:38:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5743dy/got_cozened_into_a_dinner_with_the_inlaws_what/
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Normally I have four cups of coffee for "breakfast" and a Subway salad for lunch, which comes out to about 300 calories every day before dinner. Today we're going to my in-laws' house for dinner and I am so not feeling it, but I won't be able to get out of it unless I break a bone. MIL cooks nothing but full-fat heaps of lard. I don't know exactly what we're having, but I know that even if I get moderate portions, it'll come out to 600-700 calories a plate at *least*, maybe twice that much if she serves my plate before I can get to the stove myself.
Should I fast until dinner in an effort to minimize overall calorie consumption, or have a snack late in the afternoon to try to curb my appetite before I get there?
[Rant/Rave] [RANT] Calling other people fat?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Oct 12 07:00:29 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/573x6i/rant_calling_other_people_fat/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] We're stronger today.
/u/TinyTinyCleverCDR [156 cm | 50.8 kg | 21.73 | -7.7 kg | F]
Created: Wed Oct 12 06:27:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/573seb/were_stronger_today/
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Just posting this as an affirmation to myself. I've had a horrible binge week, but that changes today.
You know the scale's higher than it was before you slipped. It has to be. But does that matter? You weren't happy before. The only way to get to a better number is to stop ignoring it and ACT BETTER. I'm fatter now. I was fat then. Time to cut the excuses and *stop being fat altogether.*
Let's do this.
[Discussion] Anyone else fasting for Yom Kippur?
/u/Healthilyornot [5'2" | 146lbs | -47lbs | F]
Created: Wed Oct 12 06:21:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/573rgt/anyone_else_fasting_for_yom_kippur/
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It's so much easier when I "have" to do it :D
[Discussion] Way To Go Wednesday October 12, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Wed Oct 12 06:03:03 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/573ox6/way_to_go_wednesday_october_12_2016/
---
This is the weekly achievement thread for October 12, 2016.
This weekly thread is to spotlight those achievements you feel don't necessarily warrant their own post, but you'd like to celebrate all the same. This is not limited to specifically ED-related goals; share anything you are happy about having done or accomplished recently!
*****
Achievement threads are posted every Wednesday.
Have any questions or concerns? Comment below, or [PM the mods.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FproED)
[Meme/Humor] Just found out that I've won a competition for £70 worth of chocolate (Cadbury's Ultimate Chocolate Hamper)
/u/smokesanddietcokes [Adipose Industries]
Created: Wed Oct 12 04:06:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/573cci/just_found_out_that_ive_won_a_competition_for_70/
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omg no why me lmao.
this is just too funny.
me. *me*.
Chocolate is a huge binge food for me. I love it so much.. oh shit. Haaahaha.
I mean I purposely entered, but only because I always enter free competitions.
Gonna sell it on ebay for £50 or something the moment I get it, not even opening it ofc, so I can get a nice Xmas present for my partner and some broccoli <3
[Help] Losing a pound a day - too much?
/u/stillweighting [5'4 | CW 130 | GW 99 | LW 107 | F]
Created: Wed Oct 12 02:16:32 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5732jh/losing_a_pound_a_day_too_much/
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Hey guys,
So I've been massively restricting over the past couple of weeks (around 300 cals a day plus exercise) and I've been losing a pound a day. I'm not getting any binging urges at all but I just feel like it's unsustainable.
I'm worried that if I up my calorie intake then I'll just gain. Has anyone got any suggestions or input?
Thank you x
[Help] Startin a 3-day fast, any tips? D:
/u/aaren0 [5'5 | shisno]
Created: Wed Oct 12 02:08:05 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5731r9/startin_a_3day_fast_any_tips_d/
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[removed]
[Discussion] Does anyone take Yasmin (birth control)?
/u/lightfeathers [5'4" | CW 112 | GW 95 | F]
Created: Wed Oct 12 02:03:39 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5731c4/does_anyone_take_yasmin_birth_control/
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I'm about to take them to help with PCOS and I'm kind of terrified of the side effects. Can you please share your experiences with me?
Edit: if it matters, I'll be taking it with Ritalin LA, Jovia and Aripiprazole.
[Thinspo] Can someone guess her weight for me?
/u/sororitygirl09119
Created: Wed Oct 12 01:51:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57307j/can_someone_guess_her_weight_for_me/
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I'm a lurker, but I just wanted an idea of how much Julia Kelly weighs. Some fan websites say she's 99lbs but I don't believe it. She is confirmed at 5'4 tho~
Here are some pics:
[One](http://cdn-s3.si.com/s3fs-public/images/julia-kelly-facebook9_1.jpg)
[Two](https://fashionnovablog.files.wordpress.com/2014/07/10296963_1487707574791989_796314261_n.jpg?w=716&h=716&crop=1)
[Three](http://celebritywc.com/images/julia-kelly-13.jpg)
[Four](https://fashionnovablog.files.wordpress.com/2014/07/915578_878728152142618_1214166289_n.jpg)
[Tip] Any tips on getting rid of the PCOS belly?
/u/explodingrhinoceros [5'7" | CW: 166.0 | BMI: 25.9 | SW: 220.0 lbs | GW: 125.0 lbs | F]
Created: Wed Oct 12 01:43:25 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/572zh3/any_tips_on_getting_rid_of_the_pcos_belly/
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I know it's specific but I need help! I still have a very visible gut... it needs to go away!
[Discussion] "ABC Diet" experience?
/u/Golden-Guns [5' 7" | 158 | BMI: 25 | -35 | F]
Created: Wed Oct 12 00:28:49 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/572s0q/abc_diet_experience/
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[removed]
[Rant/Rave] Success always followed by failure
/u/Space-Punk [5'11" | 28.22 | -37lbs | M]
Created: Tue Oct 11 23:44:56 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/572n7l/success_always_followed_by_failure/
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I was doing so well. For a week I was happy with my calories but now I've binged for three days in a row. I don't even want to eat! I sit here and tell myself "No, no, no!" but I always reason with myself to get past it. "You're fat anyway, eating that isn't going to make a difference." "Well, you've been so good you should have a cheat meal!" "You can just start over tomorrow. Tomorrow you'll do so much better!" And then even though I know I could resist, I binge. I feel so gross and disappointed with myself.
Deciding to start counting tommorow
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Oct 11 23:32:44 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/572ltf/deciding_to_start_counting_tommorow/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] I'm getting a constant daily reminder of my goals and I'm torn how I feel about it. Very long post.
/u/aerienne [5'5" | 145.8 | F]
Created: Tue Oct 11 23:31:25 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/572lnn/im_getting_a_constant_daily_reminder_of_my_goals/
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This is a very long post. Some of you like that; if not, it's okay. I just need to get this out and I know you guys are the best at understanding.
I'm working for a French family. The dad is normal and the mom is a bit overweight. I was expecting the lithe, slim Parisian woman because they are very wealthy and only want the best. She dresses relatively sloppy for here and it looks worse sometimes simply because of her figure. My goal is to look more ~French~ than she does. She's very kind, but she's a reminder of how people view me.
The 3 kids are very skinny.
* The youngest is 12 and she is small for her age already. She does ballet and she has that almost sinewy, yet graceful thinness. She eats like a madwoman though, but she's rarely still and burns it all off.
* The 14 year old boy is shaped like...well, a 14 year old boy. He's also small for his age. But I'm so jealous of narrow hips, it kills me.
* Now there is the 15 year old, almost 16. She sees me as her big sister already and is very comfortable with me. She has a lot of 'growing-up' questions that her mom isn't around to answer, so I'm here for her. Her waist is impossibly small. I feel like a tree tree compared to her. Imagine the smallest you can be right before you hit the bony stage of thinness. Very small frame, but has that natural, effortless thin.
I know these kids are thin because they don't eat as much and they are all very active. The eldest is very aware of food, but to a degree. Not quite an ED, but just that of someone coming into their independence and learning about nutrition. Something we all went through.
There is a Greek/Roman statue in the foyer of a nude woman. Something like [this](http://www.metmuseum.org/toah/images/h5/h5_52.11.5.jpg), very generic. The 12 year old says she thinks it's gross and pretended to scrape off all fat.
I can't help but wonder what they think of me. Now I know that's the classic ED thing we hate to hear 'If you think you're fat, what about me?!?!'. But they hug me and whatnot and can clearly feel/see I'm not skinny. I feel like the typical fat American next to them; a constant reminder not to take an extra serving or to ensure they exercise that day.
You'd think it'd make me not eat all day. But I've been practically binging daily, or at least overeating, since I've been here. My clothes are uncomfortable and I'm in a constant state of being self-conscious. I'm getting better and recognizing my anxiety before I act on it. I know it's a vicious circle and I'm doing my best to get out of it. It's hard to break old ED habits, as we all know, and I know it takes time.
But I want to look like I'm part of this family. I want to look like their older sister. I'm here until the end of July, so it's easy. It's getting cold here, so I can lose weight faster without it being noticed (although losing weight too fast hardly seems to be a problem of mine).
I'm off now to go work with them. The youngest and I bake something every Wednesday and I must remind myself not to eat or taste anything. I've only had coffee today and I'd like to keep it that way until dinner.
Thank you for listening to my ramblings.
Just need to get this off my chest.
/u/Kinglens311
Created: Tue Oct 11 22:59:22 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/572hvp/just_need_to_get_this_off_my_chest/
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https://www.reddit.com/r/proED/comments/572hc5/just_need_to_get_this_off_my_chest/?ref=search_posts&utm_source=ifttt
[Rant/Rave] Just need to get this off my chest.
/u/draugr_wight [5'4 | my ass still hits the door | F]
Created: Tue Oct 11 22:54:38 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/572hc5/just_need_to_get_this_off_my_chest/
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So I've recently made a rather drastic switch from binge drinking + regular eating, to sobriety and severe restricting. I haven't eaten over 300 calories any day this week. Because the change was so drastic I've been horribly sick, unable to attend classes and barely able to leave the room. Rationally I know I should eat more, that <800 would be much more sustainable. Last year I dropped 10kg by eating at that amount. But I just can't seem to bring myself to do it. Even the thought is sickening. The only reason I even ate today is because I was barely able to function, and even then I've only had a granola bar (219cal) and about 20cal worth of carrots, I honestly don't know if I could force myself to eat more than that.
It's not this feeling of sickness I wanted to complain about though, because I know it'll pass once my body adjusts. It's that twice I've been feeling so rotten that I tried reaching out to my closest friends in the world, my girlfriend and my best friend. I couldn't bring myself to outright tell them that I was relapsing, but I told my GF that I was restricting again and worried about the situation (she knows I've struggled with an ED and I've outright TOLD her that our current life situation might trigger a relapse for me), and she just kind of... brushed it off? "It's okay if you watch what you eat, let's just keep an eye on it. Anyway..." My other friend wasn't much better, she just encouraged me to stay sober and stick to my diet-- I've also told her I had an ED before. Both my GF and my friend are long distance, so this is basically a confirmation that nobody will pick up on this habit for a while if I hide it-- and if I'm honest that scares me a little, because I know I'm going to end up doing some damage to myself but I don't know how to stop it.
In a way I'm glad, because this means I can lose all the weight I want before I meet my GF over Christmas, I'll be sexy for her and she'll be delighted. I can wear those outfits she's been sending me pictures of, telling me I'll look so cute in them. I already knew they think I need to lose the weight and I don't want to disappoint them.
But at the same time I just can't help but feel a little betrayed? Irrational as it is, this feels like kind of a kick in the gut, and I can't stop wondering if maybe I'm just doing this all for attention and that's why I feel so shitty right now. I don't know. I'm probably overthinking this all.
Does anyone else have experiences with having their ED behavior accepted/encouraged by others?
[Goal] Day 2!
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Oct 11 22:43:38 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/572fxv/day_2/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/17c865e422204d0ab10972436d060878?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=aaef065258f6c87aac2209eeb83bca62
[Rant/Rave] i wish i knew how to control myself better [rant]
/u/4inthemourning
Created: Tue Oct 11 22:33:12 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/572eo5/i_wish_i_knew_how_to_control_myself_better_rant/
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i have a huge problem with not feeling full, or feeling hungry, no matter what i do. liquids are my best shot, but it takes an insane amount to feel the slightest bit full. i've tried so much, and i fear this is my biggest contributor to my weight gain aside from my pcos, which makes it harder to lose. i work out as best as i can at home, i eat pretty well (cut out white foods, main diet is vegetables and liquids), but nothing seems to work.
i wish i could go back to how i used to be, i was so determined to be skinny and i did it. now i can't find the motivation to do anything anymore after recovery/relapsing and gaining even more weight back. im eating myself deeper into my depression and i wish i could feel beautiful again.
[Help] How are you guys planning to deal with Halloween/the holiday season? [Help]
/u/IAMABaguetteAMA [5'6" | 106 lbs | 17.0 | 11 lbs | F]
Created: Tue Oct 11 22:12:10 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/572bu9/how_are_you_guys_planning_to_deal_with/
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I'm really stressed, I'll be with my friends and they'll ask questions if I don't binge on candy. I'm probably going to fast for a few days before so I can eat some candy and not feel as guilty.
[Goal] getting closer and closer to my goal weight :)
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Oct 11 21:29:30 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5725vg/getting_closer_and_closer_to_my_goal_weight/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/0d50d499723a4db1b97d0b53d53b5156?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=fb942c759b1279efcac3456fc0445aed
My weight is out of control
/u/MeraxesPestis [5'2" | 241 lbs | 45.7 | -49 lbs | GQ]
Created: Tue Oct 11 21:04:43 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/57225p/my_weight_is_out_of_control/
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[removed]
[Help] Why don't I look thin? [Help]
/u/superfuckingsecret [5'10" | 113.8 | 16. 06| non-binary]
Created: Tue Oct 11 20:45:11 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/571z4e/why_dont_i_look_thin_help/
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Hi! I'm having sort of a small relapse, after being weight-restored for 4 years after going to a clinic. I've lost a little weight, putting me at BMI 17 with the new calculator. When I was really thin, closer to BMI 13.5, I was a teenager and didn't ever look scary small. Not a lot of bones, but I did have hair loss and lanugo and all the other gross side-effects. I found photos of my weight gain that I stupidly posted online after treatment (up to BMI 18.88) in a skinnygossip thread a few weeks ago, described by a bunch of strangers as "reverse" and "this makes me so sad". Why the fuck to I look so much fatter than other people my size?
I'm assigned female, 5'10", not athletic. I eat pretty badly, but under 1200, often under 1000. What can I do to look thinner? Just keep at it? Exercise? Please help me. I see people on here 1, 2, BMI points above me who look way smaller.
[Other] Unexpected thinspo
/u/ThinFit96 [5'2 | CW:125lbs CGW:115lbs | 23.68 | -10lbs | F]
Created: Tue Oct 11 20:27:26 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/571wcl/unexpected_thinspo/
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I'm currently doing a two week long residency at a ballet school and today at lunch I was literally surrounded by perfectly thin ballet students. Literally the most triggering thing ever xP got me back on track without even having to try aha
[Help] Question of the Day.
/u/BlackGirlSteeze
Created: Tue Oct 11 20:18:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/571uz1/question_of_the_day/
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How do you feel about the new trend of overweight models?
[Help] Help. Which one do I start with.
/u/newportshorty [5'9 | CW:180 | -40]
Created: Tue Oct 11 20:06:02 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/571t1k/help_which_one_do_i_start_with/
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http://imgur.com/roNrhlZ
[Help] I need some words of... encouragement or something.
/u/Olligale [5'4 | 122 | BMI | GW: 109 | F]
Created: Tue Oct 11 19:58:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/571rwc/i_need_some_words_of_encouragement_or_something/
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I seriously hate myself right now. I used to be at a weight I liked, although.... kind of high. I definitely wasn't at my all time low or anything but I was okay with the number at least and I was working on being okay with how I looked (wasn't going too well.)
Well, in March my best friend died and I completely lost control. I've gained 10 pounds and I am now at my all time high.
What's even more terrifying than that is that I am meeting up with the absolute love of my life in about 10 days. I haven't seen him in about 7 years and I'm about 15 pounds heavier now. He's a perfectionist to the core and I know that he will be disappointed in me. I know that he loves me for who I truly am, but I still can't help but think I will shock and disappoint him. I have been waiting for SO LONG to meet up with him again and now I really feel like he won't like me the way he thinks he does. And I know I shouldn't want him to like me if he really is superficial -- he ISN'T. But I can't help but feel this way.
I can't gain control of how unhealthy I have been. I mean, like, today, I ate an entire family sized bag of Doritos and a whole cake. Like, this is seriously completely out of control but I can't force myself to not eat like this. I have no idea what to do with myself at this point.
[Help] Need advice on lifting while fasting/restricting, please? How to stay as safe as possible in my current situation?
/u/smokesanddietcokes [Adipose Industries]
Created: Tue Oct 11 19:55:07 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/571rat/need_advice_on_lifting_while_fastingrestricting/
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Usually I feel like I *somewhat* know what I'm doing now when it comes to lifting, but I'm a bit stuck atm.
wall o' text explanation, question can be skipped to after this :)
---
Last couple of weeks I've had trouble eating right for it. I'm not making any progress, and feeling awful at the gym. Been very close to injuring myself a few times.
I know I need to eat enough for it and usually I manage to better than this, but it's stressing me out right now - so I restrict further due to stress, then binge out of the stress (which just makes me lethargic tbh). I have some other life stresses going on atm too, financial stuff, family stuff... all contributing to messing up my eating habits, if I'm honest.
I'm thinking of lightening up at the gym for a couple of weeks, just to take the pressure off when it comes to food and eating so I don't have to worry about eating enough/more for it.. and to make sure I don't actually hurt myself, since I'm struggling.
I've already messaged my PT to ask him if it's alright for me to do this (telling him it's due to 'not feeling well right now', 'not sleeping'), I only have 2 sessions left of my current routine and have asked him if I can complete them in 2 weeks rather than this week. I think he will be okay with this, I think he's noticed I've been crappy at the gym and he's pretty chill anyway.
But I still want to go to the gym, I still want to lift. I'll feel shitty if I don't.
---
**So question is**:
HOW to keep it light, lifting to at least attempt to maintain as much muscle and strength as possible, while fasting and sticking to possibly a high deficit? I'm planning on going to lower weight, higher rep.. but is this really the best option? *Especially* if I lift during multiple-day fasts and higher restriction - would higher weight, lower rep conserve more energy? Also planning to stick to things I'm confident with my form on, so I don't have to worry so much about my lack of focus. Should I give myself a time limit to my sessions? i.e no more than an hour?
Perhaps sticking to dumbbells is a good idea? I reallllyyy don't want to go on machines, would like to keep to free weights if possible.
(**Example**: I'm going to the gym tomorrow, Wednesday. I havn't eaten since Sunday night and know I will struggle with breakfast tomorrow morning too. I'm dreading the stress of breakfast tomorrow, and all the stressy fasting/restricting/binging shite that comes after it :( I would still like to go to the gym and lift, even if I don't manage breakfast/a big breakfast. I know this is a terrible idea but.. any tips to keep me safe as possible if I do it? I WILL be eating some high protein safe foods within a cal limit afterwards, I feel okay with that I think...)
Any other lifters been through this? Lifting while fasting/higher restriction than usual? How did you get through it, what modifications to your routine did you make?
[Help] Dating and food anxiety
/u/KajaIsForeverAlone [height:5'9 | CW: 147 BMI:21 | weight lost:15 lbs | Gender: F]
Created: Tue Oct 11 19:33:56 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/571nz0/dating_and_food_anxiety/
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So there's this girl I want to go out with and she really wants a pizza date at the park. It's a great idea except FOR THE PRESSURE TO EAT HALF A PIZZA
I wanna go out but I don't wanna eat all of that
What do
[Help] I could use some help
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Oct 11 19:19:05 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/571ljt/i_could_use_some_help/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] People Bend Over Backwards to Get my Approval or "Protect Me" When I’m Lighter
/u/ifitmakesmehappy [5'5 | 125| -45| F]
Created: Tue Oct 11 19:10:10 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/571k5y/people_bend_over_backwards_to_get_my_approval_or/
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Made a new account just for this.
Hey everyone.
This is just something i’ve noticed as i start losing weight from a normal BMI to a lower BMI. People see me now (thanks to losing my face fat?) and they automatically smile or become flustered, almost as an instinct.They literally bend over backwards to accommodate me, or to make sure they’re not in my way; apologizing for not holding the door for me only AFTER seeing my face, etc. I notice people give me a sort of “royal” treatment, ladies call me “sweetie” “honey” “sweetheart” like i’m a precious angel, men treat me like I’m a fragile creature, etc.
I don’t know if I like this, because in a way it can be dehumanizing, as well as condescending at times. But I know that I can definitely use it to my advantage when I need to seem innocent. It’s fueling me to keep losing weight so I’m leaner (only 10 to 15 more pounds to go!)
That’s the fact of life. I’ve been obese, I’ve been normal BMI, I’ve been up and down within a Normal BMI for the past year, and now going lower. And trust me: when you’re obese, people treat you like you’re an animal, or like you don’t have feelings.
Lean people are actually respected... I can see the difference. I can feeeeel the difference. Only other people who have been at both ends of the spectrum can testify to this. And it’s not just because I’m more outgoing and confident when I’m leaner, so they can sense that, and are attracted to my confidence...because I’m still pretty insecure. It’s the power of my looks, by themselves. Even my mom, dad, and other family members, who I know love me for who I am, unconditionally….they still treat me with more kindness and gentleness when I’m leaner.
Even babies stare at my face for long amounts of time. I read a book called “Survival of the Prettiest: The Science of Beauty,” where the author talks about how beautiful faces are objectively beautiful (and not because ‘society’ tells us that they’re beautiful) and that even babies are able to recognize this. I think of this every time a baby looks at me in public, they stare wide-eyed and keep their gaze fixated on me. It’s fascinating. Before, they would barely even notice me.
This kind of admiration is only just possible for me when I’m at a lower body fat. My face gets extremely chubby when I gain weight. I look like a completely different person, and I don’t get half the same respect or attention as I do now: I look average. So, maintaining a low body fat is just what I have to do in order to reap the benefits that come with being conventionally beautiful. If you want to be above average, sometimes you have to go to extremes. I don’t want to get to super underweight levels or anything, but keeping my BMI at the low end of normal/high end of underweight is IMO the sweet spot for my personal aesthetic.
I think of this when I want to binge. Or when I want to go off the plan. No. If I binge, my face will swell up (immediately). And I’ll start a chain reaction where I keep binging/restricting. So now I don’t binge, ever.
I don’t know what else to say. This is just random thoughts. Has anyone else noticed things like this? It just fuels my drive to get to my UGW. I don’t want to be that girl who is consumed by her appearance, but my own personal experience tells me that this is the only way I can have a better quality of life, as long as I keep living around other humans… we are vain creatures. Who knows what opportunities could potentially fall into my lap if people are this easily influenced by something as simple as being objectively attractive? Of course I’m doing well in school, but this gives me that extra competitive edge, I feel. You can be the valedictorian of your class, but if you don’t have connections or good social skills, and if people aren’t attracted to you, you won’t get very far.
I’m willing to meticulously count calories, hit the weights, and maintain my discipline in order to find out what I can get from this.
[Discussion] DAE have a fat pad at the back of their neck that makes it look like they have a hump?
/u/heartbrokenandok [5'7"-ish | 198.4 | 31-ish | -23.4 | F]
Created: Tue Oct 11 18:53:05 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/571hf2/dae_have_a_fat_pad_at_the_back_of_their_neck_that/
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I see all these beautiful women with their beautiful graceful swan necks, and here I am. With a hump. Because I am fat. :(
[Thinspo] Daily Thinspo.
/u/BlackGirlSteeze
Created: Tue Oct 11 18:46:16 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/571gb0/daily_thinspo/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/637ee4d9e9234d05be91050f91fa1c6a?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=8d735bee331c92ba27c4eb7f1e887712
[Discussion] Not hungry after fasting
/u/RetailSlaveNo1 [5'2 | CW 164.8 | GW 95 | 31.22]
Created: Tue Oct 11 18:27:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/571da2/not_hungry_after_fasting/
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I get bad cravings during fasting but once I stop fasting I can barely eat. I tried to have a good dinner to show my parents I still eat, and I ended up only eating half because I was so full I felt sick. It's amazing, I thought ending a fast would mean binge city! I even let myself have a regular Monster since I barely ate (I haven't even finished it yet lol).
Anyone else get like that? I wonder if my stomach has actually started 'shrinking'
[Discussion] Have an easy fast for those observing Yom Kippur!
/u/Hurtin93
Created: Tue Oct 11 18:11:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/571alr/have_an_easy_fast_for_those_observing_yom_kippur/
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To all the Jews here! Hope your Yom Kippur goes well! :) I'm also Jewish, and started my fast. I shouldn't even be here. Haha
[Help] What scale should I get? UK Amazon preferred.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Oct 11 18:07:11 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5719wn/what_scale_should_i_get_uk_amazon_preferred/
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[deleted]
[Help] I feel disgusting.
/u/IAMABaguetteAMA [5'6" | 106 lbs | 17.0 | 11 lbs | F]
Created: Tue Oct 11 17:58:10 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5718fh/i_feel_disgusting/
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So today I binged. I ate almost 1500 calories. I feel so gross and bloated and I already feel like I've gained 10 lbs. do y'all have any tips on how to bounce back? I'm thinking of fasting tomorrow.
[Discussion] Telegram group chat
/u/skin_ny [5'9.5" | 113.6 | 16.19 | -44 | F]
Created: Tue Oct 11 17:53:53 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5717rr/telegram_group_chat/
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I've created a group chat on this app called telegram (has a desktop client and mobile app) and this is the invite link:
https://telegram.me/joinchat/DrwKHgp5LCl7_Qt9eWqxww
Would be great if some of you could join :)
[Discussion] DAE Have Video Game Inspo?
/u/deanhipchester [4'11 | 113.8 lbs | 24.65 | -26.8 lbs | F]
Created: Tue Oct 11 17:42:59 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5715ye/dae_have_video_game_inspo/
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I recently started the Tomb Raider series and am super obsessed with Laura Croft. Like she's so fit and honestly goals?? I know she's fictional but she probably goes quite a while without food too.
And the characters from Dragon Age and The Witcher and amazing body wise too. I know they're not real, but I feel like a lot of them have bodies that could be.
[Rant/Rave] I just ate an entire block of cheese
/u/get-it_together [5'3 |160??| UGW 125 | F]
Created: Tue Oct 11 17:41:01 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5715lx/i_just_ate_an_entire_block_of_cheese/
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...which followed a giant bag of watermelon sour patch kids. Send help. I don't think I'm ever going to be able to take a shit again.
Also: Monster Zero Ultra Red is lifegiving.
[Meme/Humor] hilarious joke from the cereal I'm binging on
/u/smallpaint [6'2" | 170lb | M]
Created: Tue Oct 11 16:59:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/570yhx/hilarious_joke_from_the_cereal_im_binging_on/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/306babfa52f9403083237175581e4de7?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=172dda34c2e50b13a05a4a0194d2e445
[Discussion] My ED keeps getting triggered by the overweight people around me and it makes me feel horrible.
/u/slytherlin [5'5" | CW: 128 | GW:116 | NB]
Created: Tue Oct 11 16:52:01 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/570x9x/my_ed_keeps_getting_triggered_by_the_overweight/
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So I thought I had mostly gotten over my ED but ofc not, that'd be too simple. I'm trans and part of an awesome trans group on my campus full of other awesome trans people, but the thing is...literally 90% of the people in this group are overweight. Like, obese overweight. They're always eating snacks and complaining about not being able to find clothes that help them pass.
I feel like a horrible person for even thinking this but honest to god being around them has made me give in to my ED again. I cannot end up like them. Whenever they snack on sugary things during our meetings, all I can think is, God, do I look like that when I eat? Why do I have to eat so much?
Like they're wonderful, amazing people, and the emotional support I get from that group is awesome. But looking at them.. I'm constantly paranoid. Do I look like that? I really do need to lose more weight. What if I'm actually as overweight as they are and I'm deluding myself. What if I look that overweight and no one tells me...
Thoughts like that have brought back my damn ED and it sucks cause they're both my emotional support and the most recent force driving my disorder.
Then I feel horrible and judgmental and toxic which then fuels my ED even *more*.
/end rant. :(
[Help] How to say no when given food?
/u/throwaway_cantstop
Created: Tue Oct 11 16:29:33 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/570tgs/how_to_say_no_when_given_food/
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I'm currently living with my bf and his parents. Quite a few times now his dad will bring me food and I eat it. Even if I'm not hungry/don't like/want the food. But I feel like I'm refusing his hospitality or being an ungrateful guest if I don't eat what his parents make. How do you guys say no thank you without offending? How/should I ask him to stop?
[Discussion] UK people, help out a NEWK (haha get it bc uk newk haaaaa) person with snacks!
/u/pencilwonder [175cm | why | NB]
Created: Tue Oct 11 16:05:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/570p4w/uk_people_help_out_a_newk_haha_get_it_bc_uk_newk/
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I'm a student who just moved a while ago, can't figure out your grocery stores, keep getting lost in them, theyre too big oH GOD JUST GIVE ME LOWCAL CHEAP FOOD THANK YOU <3
[Goal] Progress!
/u/xtabbithax
Created: Tue Oct 11 15:44:28 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/570le7/progress/
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[removed]
[Rant/Rave] Frustrations.
/u/Alexa1p [5'5'' | 110 | 18 | -10.7 | F]
Created: Tue Oct 11 15:19:12 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/570gp0/frustrations/
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My coworker bought me a huge Boba drink today, and another one of my coworkers were like, "Haha wow that's so many calories. Probably about a thousand." I have no way of knowing how many calories are in it, but I hadn't eaten so I ended up drinking 4/5ths of it before throwing it away... and I still have to go out to eat with my housemate later. Ugh.
#1
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Oct 11 15:10:52 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/570f4n/1/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/2be71c4c4a154c089886bc117f59d349?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=d7885686c1172569c97b97002c34640f
[Help] Okay I have a question about mirrors
/u/TheStuff1
Created: Tue Oct 11 15:03:17 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/570dmr/okay_i_have_a_question_about_mirrors/
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If I take a video of myself on my phone I look damn good and thin, and if I look at myself in my one mirror at home, it's the same thing. However, the full length mirrors in my college bathroom make me look much wider and shorter. What is the most accurate way of seeing my own body from an objective standpoint? Is a video or picture more accurate than a mirror?
[Rant/Rave] Well I'm completely nonfunctional
/u/taeyeons-comrade [perpetual shame]
Created: Tue Oct 11 15:01:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/570d7p/well_im_completely_nonfunctional/
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I took my usual EC stack dose and I guess it just worked a little too well today because I can't get my hands to stop shaking and I can't focus on anything. Maybe it's because I purged in the morning, who knows. Yay me.
[Goal] 1000th attempt at fasting and going well!
/u/sossox
Created: Tue Oct 11 14:51:22 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/570ba2/1000th_attempt_at_fasting_and_going_well/
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Maybe not my thousandth, but it feels like I've tried to fast on so many occasions that ended up triggering a binge. I wanted to try an EC stack but I couldn't get ephedrine quite yet so I just took a caffeine pill. I'm not sure if that suppresses my appetite at all, but if not it's a great placebo lol. It's now about 20 hours in and I feel good! I've had little spurs of hunger but they've passed and I barely notice them anymore. Hoping I can make it to 24 hours and I'm confident I will. 24 is a huge accomplishment for me and this kinda proved to myself that I can do it. I have at least a little willpower in me.
[Rant/Rave] Drag Me Down
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Oct 11 14:50:50 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/570b5y/drag_me_down/
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[removed]
[Rant/Rave] Why do people not understand that No means No?
/u/IdidntChooseThis [5'11.5" | CW: 118.6 GW: 114 UGW: 110 | 15.73 | 19F]
Created: Tue Oct 11 14:49:49 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/570ay8/why_do_people_not_understand_that_no_means_no/
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It's been a tumultuous weekend for me (fall break 5 day weekend): my therapist wants me to take medical leave from uni to go to residence or something similar. My brother told me that I've thrown my life away at 19 because I'm an attention whore. I've eaten a lot. And I've hung out with people every night this weekend (I'm introverted).
Another friend invited me out to dinner, and I am just not feeling it, but he can't take no for an answer. He's just a needy friend (which is okay I am needy sometimes too, but this is every week), and I *have* to do this. He's a cool friend and we share classes in our major together, so I can't just drop him. I just wanted to stay in tonight and eat 250 cals of noodles (two servings and a tiny bit of marinara sauce that I have left over. Yesterday was such an awful day for me because I went out both meals, so it hurt my wallet and my mood, but now I am going out to eat and that's going to break at least 900 calories by the time I stuff my face with rolls/breadsticks.
I'm supposed to be eating better, but dammit I saw 121 today on the scale and it sucked. I can't help it. And as soon as my therapist hears about it she's going to be upset too.
I just want my No's to be taken seriously by people. No means no people.
UPDATE:
I went out with him and it went well. I did end up eating 1300 calories worth of food, but I am not too upset by it since it was so good, like if I was "spending" these calories on something, this was worth it. I'll just be doing low intake for a bit, maybe my gain won't be too bad.
[Rant/Rave] Scale finally arrived, weight was lower than I assumed?
/u/frailraven [5'10 | CW 117 | LW 115 | F20]
Created: Tue Oct 11 14:48:14 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/570amw/scale_finally_arrived_weight_was_lower_than_i/
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So I ordered a scale, caffeine pills, and glucomannan pills. I assumed that my weight was probably around 140-145 turns out I actually weigh 128! This just confirms how bad my body dysmorphia is.
I'm still far from my gw, but I think the glucomannan and caffeine will help a lot.
[Rant/Rave] My mother is cooking something that smells delicious and calorific and it's wafting through the house.
/u/smokesanddietcokes [Adipose Industries]
Created: Tue Oct 11 14:03:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5701xs/my_mother_is_cooking_something_that_smells/
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ffs why lol
i'm getting that thing where your jaw starts hurting because you're salivating. omg.
Anyone else live with people who DAREEEEE cook food and so have to deal with this? :P
[Discussion] Any other ancient people with children?
/u/Castoroilexperiment [5'6 | 105 | 29F| 17.68]
Created: Tue Oct 11 12:44:22 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56zmcn/any_other_ancient_people_with_children/
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I restricted to 700-800 calories for almost 5 months straight but had to stop because I could not carry my 16 pound baby or toddler anymore. Now I'm a fatass who eats around 1100 to 1300 calories for my childrens safety.
[Goal] Day 2 of 21.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Oct 11 12:14:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56zgpq/day_2_of_21/
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[deleted]
[Thinspo] How she can eat so much and be so skinny I will never understand.
/u/hunterxgreen [5'4'' | too much | ditto | -22 | F | ]
Created: Tue Oct 11 12:08:05 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56zfbq/how_she_can_eat_so_much_and_be_so_skinny_i_will/
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[Rant/Rave] [Rave] SV! Finally not obese!
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Oct 11 11:00:05 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56z1mw/rave_sv_finally_not_obese/
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[deleted]
[Discussion] DAE sit next to public microwaves
/u/iwannagetbetter96 [5'10 | CW:135 | -20 | F]
Created: Tue Oct 11 10:48:12 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56yzbo/dae_sit_next_to_public_microwaves/
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Its the best, all the good smells but none of the guilt.
[Discussion] One of these
/u/Pitaia [1.70cm | CW: aaaHHAHA | BMI: ? |GW: S M A L L|GQ]
Created: Tue Oct 11 10:41:31 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56yy3f/one_of_these/
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Do you have any self-imposed rewards for reaching milestones? I've never understood these (seemed like something you do with a pet. Self-improvement doesn't require rewards), but recently I realized that I accidentally made one when I accepted that I'll only get a tattoo I've wanted for a long time when I reach my GW and my arms are smaller. Anyone else?
Those who use laxatives...
/u/hh_lb
Created: Tue Oct 11 10:19:29 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56ytwz/those_who_use_laxatives/
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[removed]
[Other] Skeleton mermaid tattoo!
/u/mermaid_puppy [5'11" | 137lb | UGW 115 | F]
Created: Tue Oct 11 10:18:48 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56yts2/skeleton_mermaid_tattoo/
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http://i.imgur.com/2Xn9p7N.jpg
[Help] Help me convince myself that eating is better than not eating
/u/Thunder2WonderThighs
Created: Tue Oct 11 10:18:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56ytna/help_me_convince_myself_that_eating_is_better/
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I'm trying to stay high (700-1000 a day). That's how I lost the most weight, but lately I've felt compelled to go lower and to fast. I stayed at 500 a day all last week but then binged back everything I'd lost and I'm so fucking tired of losing the same 8lbs over and over. But when I go over 700 I feel like I'm eating too much. :-(
I'm trying to convince myself that it's OK to eat if it means I won't binge on shit later.
[Discussion] My biggest problem with this subreddit
/u/mermaid_puppy [5'11" | 137lb | UGW 115 | F]
Created: Tue Oct 11 10:07:33 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56yrld/my_biggest_problem_with_this_subreddit/
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Is that I go through the posts too quickly! I literally read every new post everyday, and I'm sad when I run out of new content. It is such a wonderful community! I'm glad there's a place for people from all walks of life to discuss the problems they have in common. You guys are the best 😘
[Discussion] Daily Food Diary! October 11, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Tue Oct 11 10:02:18 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56yqfl/daily_food_diary_october_11_2016/
---
This is a daily food diary thread for October 11, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
[Help] Had a pizza day
/u/Please445leave
Created: Tue Oct 11 09:30:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56yke1/had_a_pizza_day/
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My friend had a FANTASTIC (sarcasm) idea to bring over 2 very big, very greasy pizzas. I didnt say no, i was scared to reveal my intention to lose weight. So i had 3 slices and two glasses of (very sweet) wine. I couldnt wait for her to leave so i can purge before i digest too much of this absolute filth. I did not enjoy it and had planned a stir fry for dinner. I purged until my throat caught fire, but i know i am still over my preferred daily intake. I want to compensate for this in the next 1 or 2 days by restricting. But i need your opinions:
Do you guys find it easier to eat very little for 2 or 3 days, or to fast for a day?
Edit: its my first time posting but have lurked for quite some time. Hello!
[Discussion] Is Yogi's "Healthy Fasting" tea the same as its old "Fasting" tea?
/u/ppyeoreul-mudgosipeo [5'6 | 2 Days w/o Binge | BMI 26.9 | F]
Created: Tue Oct 11 09:05:14 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56yfnb/is_yogis_healthy_fasting_tea_the_same_as_its_old/
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I remember the "Fasting" tea had a nice cinnamon flavor to it and really killed my appetite, but the Amazon reviews for the "Healthy Fasting" tea say it has a strong licorice flavor, and I am *not* looking for licorice tea. :/
[Goal] Lost 3 inches off each thigh!!!
/u/erilaz- [5'7 | CW: 185 | GW: 110 | -45lbs | F]
Created: Tue Oct 11 08:57:19 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56ye4i/lost_3_inches_off_each_thigh/
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So I measure myself at work once a month and decided to steal a tape measure to do them at home. I just measured my thighs and I'm so happy???!!! They are my worst area, and I'm so surprised by the result
It really pepped me up since I saw a gain(def water weight) on the scale. I hope you guys have some non-scale victories today as well :)
male ED here. anything you guys think I should work on?
/u/kieran01pd2016
Created: Tue Oct 11 08:57:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56ye2z/male_ed_here_anything_you_guys_think_i_should/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/4fbdc78891eb454bad754129ec4f297a?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=6f414d645f2d1a4ab96ebd48a69d0b19
[Help] Lose It! better than MyFitnessPal?
/u/matchstick_mind [5'0 | CW: 96.4lbs | GW: 84lbs | BMI: 19.83 | 21/F]
Created: Tue Oct 11 08:51:47 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56yd3e/lose_it_better_than_myfitnesspal/
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Has anyone tried it? Is it better than MyFitnessPal? I know that Lose It! will still project how long it'll take for you to reach your goal if you eat less than 1000 calories, but I have no idea if they have a large food database like MyFitnessPal does. Anyone use it? What are your thoughts?
[Thinspo] Thinspo Sketch for Fall! :)
/u/rukittenmerightnow
Created: Tue Oct 11 08:51:07 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56ycz6/thinspo_sketch_for_fall/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/ffd8e41e3908476f840d00363999727d?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=50899b235964f3c12b08d7b6b9d70590
it's been a year...
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Oct 11 08:47:03 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56yc9l/its_been_a_year/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/f6fd5cb86e214f7d997459a513fc7b21?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=59dcec9e591515957792aef1ff337209
[Thinspo] Saw this girl at Starbucks... my thinspiration for the day
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Oct 11 08:39:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56yazj/saw_this_girl_at_starbucks_my_thinspiration_for/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/0c7407f9e35b46e8a8f5a1288823f815?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=88d736dad06456726c290f403137027b
When your CRUSH ditches you for the fat girl
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Oct 11 08:36:18 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56yady/when_your_crush_ditches_you_for_the_fat_girl/
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[removed]
[Discussion] Even restrictive eating can be expensive... sound weird, right?
/u/chicklet2011 [5'6" | 152# | 26% | -38# | F]
Created: Tue Oct 11 08:17:39 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56y77x/even_restrictive_eating_can_be_expensive_sound/
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Sugar free drinks, shiritaki noodles, halo-top, atkins bars, cigarettes, stimulants... the list goes on and on. This stuff feels like a life line, but it can really add up and blow your buget. I know that the easy answer is something akin to "just don't eat!", but in reality, I want flavors and textures in my mouth, and I want there to sometimes be a feeling of satiety is my stomach. What are your favorite cost effective items that stave off a binge or make your restriction easier?
[Goal] Had a stomach bug, now put off by food (hooray!)
/u/notthinohno [161cm |125.2lbs | 22.45 | - 51lbs | F]
Created: Tue Oct 11 07:31:31 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56xzqa/had_a_stomach_bug_now_put_off_by_food_hooray/
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I got a stomach bug from my kids - after a night and a day of vomiting and...you know...other gross stuff, i'm now feeling mostly better but still entirely put off by food. I eat a small meal a day of something light, and a few cups of tea (can't even handle the idea of coffee now), and i'm feeling good about myself.
Before this I was stuck in a bingeing rut, despairing about what in the hell I could do to turn my eating habits around, fearing that i'd gain back everything I'd lost over the past year. But now i've got another taste of how it feels to go without food, I really think I can do it this time.
[Thinspo] If you start to feel like you are breaking remember: there is a crack in everything, that's how the light gets in. 💕🎀🌸😘
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Oct 11 06:39:39 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56xrx5/if_you_start_to_feel_like_you_are_breaking/
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[Rant/Rave] I guess I can't eat lunch now.
/u/throwaway0908123 [5'7 | 120 | 18.73 | -17 | F]
Created: Tue Oct 11 06:18:44 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56xp2w/i_guess_i_cant_eat_lunch_now/
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My parents finally got around to taking me to a nutritionist, like they've been threatening to for months now, and the entire place was so full of fat logic - I'll have to make a separate post with a whole list of all the crazy shit I heard. But anyway, we walked out of there with a jar of coconut oil and a tub of protein powder for making protein smoothies, which have *500 calories.* Half of my daily intake. For breakfast. I've decided to start cutting down on/skipping lunch, but that's the one meal I've never been able to skip before. I get *so hungry* in the afternoon, it's ridiculous, and I always ave horrible binges when I try to skip lunch. Wish me luck! <3
[Discussion] Self-care and Beauty Q+A October 11, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Tue Oct 11 06:02:45 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56xmz2/selfcare_and_beauty_qa_october_11_2016/
---
Eating disorders are real, complex, and devastating conditions that can have serious consequences for physical health. Use this thread to discuss harm reduction and beauty tips, plus suggestions on how to build back up the physical self before and after engaging in disordered behaviors.
Please be wary of false advice and information. Be sure to research the facts before taking anyone's advice, no matter who they are. Remember that diagnosing members is unacceptable. **Anyone looking for medical guidance should seek the opinion of a medically licensed professional.**
*****
Self-care and beauty threads are posted every Tuesday.
Have any questions or concerns? Comment below, or [PM the mods.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FproED)
[Other] Hour 17 of my fast!
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Oct 11 04:50:11 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56xf4r/hour_17_of_my_fast/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/aafdd34d637443f1a903abb14020ebd5?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=140eaabbe1b8bc87001f6bd051a95df5
[Help] Triggered so much I can't leave the house
/u/Pitaia [1.70cm | CW: aaaHHAHA | BMI: ? |GW: S M A L L|GQ]
Created: Tue Oct 11 04:44:38 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56xem6/triggered_so_much_i_cant_leave_the_house/
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So I've had problems with agoraphobia and social anxiety and general panic when dealing with "the outside" before. But it's getting ridiculous. I go to college and I'm already behind, that's normal for my course, at least here, but I'm too much behind. However, all the drive I have to get through that and even try to close the gap between graduations are stomped on by overbearing triggers. Skinny girls. Skinny people. Everywhere. It looks stupid to even write this out but I constantly compare myself to other women and am completely ashamed of even existing in the same place as them. They're just so thin, and I'm not. It's incredibly triggering.
How do I get over this? Do I just try to view them as thinspo? Even walking around waiting for my therapist appointment is enough to make me want to go home and exercise till my legs give out. How do you deal with real life triggering people?
ETA: I'll flair when I get on the computer in a bit, am on mobile.
[Rant/Rave] i'm so f*cking frustrated
/u/skinnylove73 [5'10 | 125 | 17.49 | -15 | F]
Created: Tue Oct 11 03:43:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56x8ze/im_so_fcking_frustrated/
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Thinking about where I was before treatment.... 14% BMI, I looked amazing in everything I wore, people thought I was a model (I used to be but wasn't currently), I had cheekbones and felt BEAUTIFUL. now- i'm five months post treatment and have lost a lot of the weight but I feel horrible. I wish I didn't spend 18 months of my life there. I could've finished my masters. It is so frustrating. I wish I was where I was. I wish I didn't have to pretend recovery to get out, I wish I was like my mom who has successfully (pretty much) avoided treatment her whole life. why can't i be one of those people. Sorry for the rant. I am just so annoyed and frustrated. I hate not fitting half of my designer clothes anymore, I hate visiting old friends, I hate when people say I look healthy. i can't wait to get back to where I was but I have to do it slowly because people are watching. UGHAHGDSHFHSD. im so annoyed. anyone in the same boat? recovery is just not for me. I will never be okay with being fat, I will never be okay with being in a 'healthy' BMI, I can deal with 15-16 BMI but I;m not listening to what 'ED dietitians' think is right because i know they are biased. okay. rant over. lol
[Help] Any experience with Bupropion?
/u/CokeAndCrayons [5'6"| 123 | 19.53 | -31 | ?]
Created: Tue Oct 11 02:35:12 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56x2ya/any_experience_with_bupropion/
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So... I just got diagnosed with Borderline yesterday and was prescribed a form of Bupropion. I googled the byeffects a bit and was delighted to see: lack of appetite / weight loss!
Hell yes, exactly what I need! Apparently I'm not thin enough for them to worry about even more weight loss so... yay for being fat ?? :'D
Anybody experience with that stuff? Will it help?
[Help] I think I really fucked myself up this time and I'm freaking out
/u/Ire_of_suburbia [5'4" | 85lbs | 14,6 | -53 | F]
Created: Tue Oct 11 01:48:13 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56wz67/i_think_i_really_fucked_myself_up_this_time_and/
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I only ever use reddit on mobile so you'll never see a properly flaired post from me *sigh* I'm sorry.
Guess who exercises way too much? Me. Guess who's heading to the ER with what's most likely a stress fracture in my foot? Still me.
I'm trying so hard not to have a panic attack but I don't think I'll make it. I can already feel the fucking fat piling on me. They'll tell me to rot on a fucking couch for god knows how long... I *can't* do it. I'm freaking the fuck out someone kill me now.
By the way, does anybody know if you can get locked up in hospital for having a BMI of 14,8 (or 14,5 if those idiots decide to take my height with shoes on) if you go to the ER with completely non-weight-related problems? I'm a minor (16) and I live in Italy if you need to know.
Update: X-rays done. Still waiting for the results. Wish me luck. At least nobody seemed to give a shit about my weight.
Update 2: No fractures thank fucking god. "Just rest and if it hurts too much put some ice on it or take some pain meds kthxbai". This morning was quite fun though /s
[Help] The beast is upon me
/u/Saltycook [5'4"| 127# |21.8| -36# | Female]
Created: Tue Oct 11 00:21:25 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56wqri/the_beast_is_upon_me/
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Broke with my boyfriend after a tough weekend at work. R work and live together to make matters worse. The binge monster had both its talons in me and I can strip myself from spending $40, $50, even $60 a day binging on food I end up purging. The strain on our relationship had cause more binges than purges the past couple weeks, so now I'm enormous and single. Third glass of wine tonight, I need advice please. Tough love appreciated
[Rant/Rave] (Rant) my body
/u/setniessesed [5'11.5" | CW: 141 GW: 130 | 18.71 | -18lbs | 20/F]
Created: Tue Oct 11 00:00:16 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56wohi/rant_my_body/
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Was commenting on another thread asking what part of your body drives you to restrict the most, and my reply was getting long and kinda ramble-y so I thought I'd just make a rant post..I would have flaired on the mobile browser but had to log in and I forgot my password lol.
Anyway here's some word vomit and stuff, just feel like I gotta get it out. I'm in a drawing/painting course and for the next piece was going to use myself as a model. As I was getting ready and looking at myself in the mirror to begin, I just couldn't. I hate my body at this point too much to immortalize it on a piece of paper..it started an intense body hate train and I'm a lot more acutely aware of all the things I hate than usual:
Definitely my sides are the worst. I can feel the fat clinging there the most acutely. And it makes my body look so ugly when my sides come out like that instead of making a smooth curve to my hips. I feel dirty almost, like it's all this grease and trash clinging inside me and I gotta scrub it all out before it drives me nuts.
Then my inner thighs; just noticed some stretch marks on my upper thighs and I wanted to puke it looks so disgusting. As well as the fat on my arms and general chest area...I'm just so soft and jiggly, I hate it so much. it's so disgusting.
I feel like my personality doesn't merit being bigger. I'm so demure and tasteless. Having more mass does not embody what I should be; I don't have personality for that. I feel like I should be taking up much less space, be less intrusive in the universe in general. When I look at my body it doesn't match who I know I am. I'm not really strong and healthy, or really happy, and I don't merit the amount of space it takes up. I can't wait until I actually feel at home in my body, whenever that is.
[Discussion] Any other guys lurking around here?
/u/BearFace370 [6'2 | 150 | 19.3 | -50lbs | M]
Created: Mon Oct 10 23:49:55 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56wnf9/any_other_guys_lurking_around_here/
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Im pretty new guy to this sub and I mainly see female thinspo(which im fine with ;)), period posts, and a lot of other stuff I can relate to, but I want to know if any other guys lurk/post around here
[Rant/Rave] Kinda freaking out because I ate so much today!
/u/wavvvybaby
Created: Mon Oct 10 23:30:35 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56wlbj/kinda_freaking_out_because_i_ate_so_much_today/
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Im currently on vacay and have been doing well at under 1000 cals a day but today I ate:
-a double chocolate quest bar(170cals)
-3 macadamia nut chocolates (180)
-a whole bag of nori popcorn (280)
-a chocolate chip cookie dough quest bar (190)
-3/4 of a dole whip in a cup (250ish?)
-some chicken(200)
Thats close to 1500 calories...
I feel so gross and disgusting. I hate food
[Goal] !!! I'M NO LONGER OVERWEIGHT !!!
/u/onlyroom_forthin [5'6 | CW:149.6 | 24.24 | SW:165 | UGW:120 | F]
Created: Mon Oct 10 23:02:22 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56wi3m/im_no_longer_overweight/
---
Weighed in at 153.0 last night, 153.0 this morning, and 153.4 at the end of the day today. All are healthy BMI, but I'm going with 153.0 because fuck why not.
[Goal] Proud of my little legs (mobile no flair)
/u/zoeglowey [5'2" | 104 | BMI 19 | - 23 | Female]
Created: Mon Oct 10 22:40:35 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56wfhc/proud_of_my_little_legs_mobile_no_flair/
---
https://i.reddituploads.com/d3636aa680a64948af7401f34289e447?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=495f8b8ceacfeee944e36fef40c6b393
[Tip] I wanted to share my recipe for lentil curry! Tasty, cheap, vegan, and only 190 Calories in a full plate!
/u/abond4 [5'7.5 | 127 | 19.6 | -53 | F]
Created: Mon Oct 10 22:02:05 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56wa9g/i_wanted_to_share_my_recipe_for_lentil_curry/
---
The ingredient list is long, but this is a real throw it in the pan and forget it recipe!
2 cups lentils
1 chopped yellow onion
1/4 cup hot red curry paste (also equivalent to 4 tablespoons)
2 tablespoons curry powder
2 teaspoons turmeric
2 teaspoons cumin
2 teaspoons chili powder (preferably Indian chili powder if you can get it; big difference between it and the more common Mexican chili powder)
1 teaspoon sugar
2 teaspoons minced garlic, or 4 cloves fresh garlic
1 teaspoon ginger (can be the bottled kind)
1 teaspoon salt
1 14 ounce can of tomato puree
1. Rinse lentils in a strainer REALLY WELL. You want to make sure that the water you rinse them with exits the strainer clear. Otherwise you'll have a residue on top while cooking them! Then put them in a pot, cover them in hot water, and simmer (medium-low heat) with the lid on for 30-45 minutes.
2. While waiting for the lentils to finish, chop up an onion and toss it into a pan with about a tablespoon of vegetable oil on medium heat. Let these caramelize for about 20 minutes, stirring occasionally.
3. Now that you're waiting on the onions and lentils, you can make your spice mixture! Mix together the curry paste, curry powder, turmeric, cumin, chili powder, garlic, salt, ginger, and sugar in a small bowl. When the onions are fully caramelized, turn the heat up to high and add in the spice mixture. Stir for 1-2 minutes, then add the tomato puree and heat it through. Remove from heat.
4. By now, your lentils should be done, so drain them, return them to the pot, and add the onion mixture from step 3. Now you're ready to eat!
You can serve this over basmati rice to fill you up even more. A cup of cooked basmati adds about 200 Calories. So you can get a whole filling meal for under 400 Calories, or still eat well for 200!
[Tip] Selfies are helping me combat body dysmorphia immensely. I snap a quick pic when I'm feeling sloppy/chubby and then re-visit it 1 hour later to see it with new eyes (more in comments).
/u/fckk [5'4| CW 120lbs | 20.60 | GW 115 | F]
Created: Mon Oct 10 21:41:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56w7eg/selfies_are_helping_me_combat_body_dysmorphia/
---
http://i.imgur.com/WzNcUib.jpg
Guys, I'm back on the wagon!!
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Oct 10 21:30:28 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56w5tt/guys_im_back_on_the_wagon/
---
[deleted]
[Discussion] EDs and Sex
/u/chimichanga_mischief [5"4 | 155 | 27.1 | F]
Created: Mon Oct 10 21:23:00 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56w4r4/eds_and_sex/
---
Hello lovelies.
So for all of us Canadians, this last weekend was thanksgiving weekend. And if you're anything like me, you ate enough to feed an entire herd of elephants and now hate yourself. I've been gaining a lot of weight recently, and am at currently at my highest weight ever. I look ready to go into hibernation (kill me).
But this isn't about that. My issue is that before going away for the thanksgiving break I started talking to this girl who I have a mutual friend with. Now I am a lesbian and she is bi-curious, and just broke up with her boyfriend. She is looking to experiment more with girls and I think she's cute so I jumped at the chance. We said that we would find a time to hang out once we were both back from the thanksgiving break. Well the break is over and I am literally the fattest I have ever been in my entire life. I feel so embarrassed and uncomfortable just feeling my stomach rolls when I bend over, or how when I sit on the bus my thighs spill off the chair. I really wanted to hook up with this girl, but I can't even imagine being naked in front of or being touched by another person right now. More importantly, I don't want to cancel on her and make her feel like it was anything she did.
The solution I've come up with is just to fast/restrict until my body is reasonable (not even UGW or anything, just until I look not-pregnant) and just put it off until then with excuses? I'm just so mad at myself because if I didn't make myself so fat I wouldn't be having this problem.
[Discussion] What part of your body makes you want to lose weight the most?
/u/dontcareifithurts__ [5'4.5 | 117 | - 4.2 | F]
Created: Mon Oct 10 21:11:18 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56w311/what_part_of_your_body_makes_you_want_to_lose/
---
Aside from my stomach, which I'm sure is a trigger for everyone... I hate my face. When I weigh 107 pounds or less, I feel beautiful. My face is defined and pretty and angular. But when I weigh over 112 pounds it gets fat. Round. Undefined. Squishy. Square. Masculine. My eyes appear to shrink.
That's what always makes me want to start restricting again the most.
[Discussion] What are your favorite grocery store staples? What low calorie items that are quick and easy do you rely on?
/u/married_to_a_reddito
Created: Mon Oct 10 20:44:16 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56vysn/what_are_your_favorite_grocery_store_staples_what/
---
For me, I can't live without those microwaveable cups of dehydrated mashed potatoes. It's only 160 calories for a big serving that keeps me pretty full. Also, 100 calorie tuna salad and cracker lunch kits. Vanilla Greek yogurt 80 calorie cups. And finally, Diet Coke and orange flavored crystal light.
[Goal] Woohoo get to change my flair once more!!!
/u/MermaidHeart [5'6" | 118lbs | 19.0 | 16lbs | Female]
Created: Mon Oct 10 20:38:34 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56vxxx/woohoo_get_to_change_my_flair_once_more/
---
I was so worried about going back to school and gaining weight, but (with all the stress) I actually ended up losing weight!!
Its a small win, and I've still got a couple more pounds to go until I hit my GW but I just wanted to post here to encourage every one else to keep trying! You guys/gals always encourage me, every day, to keep trying. And now I'm closer than I've ever been!
[Rant/Rave] disappointed
/u/salt_skin [5'4" | CW 134lbs | BMI 23.45 | GW 90 lbs | F]
Created: Mon Oct 10 20:27:38 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56vw8f/disappointed/
---
i'm so angry with myself. i ate so much more than i planned today. the worst part was, i wasn't even hungry and i ate anyway. and i drank too. so now i'm sad and drunk and i feel disgusting. at one point, while with my friends i even felt like i was going to puke because i was disgusted with myself with how much i had eaten. but of course puking immediately after eating in bathroom that is adjacent to all your friends isn't exactly subtle.
i just feel so disgusting rn. i want to puke rn, but at this point, it really wouldn't even do any good.
[Help] cooking/baking essentials?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Oct 10 20:04:17 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56vsjl/cookingbaking_essentials/
---
[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] ... my period came back
/u/00110100-00110010 [5'4'' | CW 114 | UGW 104 | 19.9 | F]
Created: Mon Oct 10 18:42:10 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56vfdd/my_period_came_back/
---
I'm so upset with myself. Menstruating is the healthy and a normal thing to do, but I hate it. It reminds me that I'm a woman, and subject to all the unjust expectations thereof. If others constantly dismiss my emotions with a casual "she's just on her period", it completely invalidates how I feel and my experience as a human being. But if I don't menstruate, then my emotions can't possibly be hormonal, they must be real, they must be just as valid as a man's.
I don't know. Maybe this is just me grappling with a lot of internalized sexist bullshit. Either way, I'm restricting until this damn beast disappears. I want to feel whole again.
[Discussion] Low cal sauce/seasoning ideas?
/u/toastyhigh [5'4 | 105.6| F]
Created: Mon Oct 10 18:41:30 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56vf9m/low_cal_sauceseasoning_ideas/
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Hot sauce has become my go to option for taste and seasoning when it comes to salads or pretty much any meal. After some googling I was pretty freaked out to find out how high cal oil and cream based dressings, and sauces are, but as I grew up eating a lot of Middle Eastern and Indian food, I find that I have to have spice in some form. I end up using sri racha or tabasco for salad and eggs, or my shirtaki noodles.
What types of low cal seasonings and sauces do you guys use?
[Rant/Rave] Why do I do good during the day...
/u/effervescentpony
Created: Mon Oct 10 18:34:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56ve7t/why_do_i_do_good_during_the_day/
---
and then totally fail at night??
I did fine today. Coffee for breakfast, some fruit and yogurt for a snack, and a salad for lunch. Then I get home from work, it's 7pm and helloooo Reese cups and pasta and ice cream and... I eat until I feel sick. Why the fck do I do this all the time??? I know I can't be the only one... I wish I had more self control. Ugh!!
[Rant/Rave] Ive become my disorder
/u/kafka__dreams
Created: Mon Oct 10 18:12:03 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56vali/ive_become_my_disorder/
---
I don't know who I am outside of this. My only goal is to lose. My mood revolves around what the scale says. Every bite is a failure. All I see is fat. My bones are struggling to escape. My nightmares are about eating. I can't imagine a meal. I feel disgusting with the food inside me. If I wake up heavier even if I know its water I want to die. If I see someone thinner than me my week is ruined. Im the most jealous person I've ever met. All I want is bones. I want every trace of femininity removed. I want to be alien and survive on water.
[Other] Best estimate of calories today: 5300
/u/goddamnroommate [5'6" | 143.8 | 23.30 | -50ish | F]
Created: Mon Oct 10 18:08:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56va00/best_estimate_of_calories_today_5300/
---
kill me and release me from my flesh prison. That is all.
[Rant/Rave] Fml.
/u/BlackGirlSteeze
Created: Mon Oct 10 17:42:01 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56v5uq/fml/
---
So yesterday I had my first panic attack in years. Since yesterday, I've had 4 panic attacks. Unprovoked. Out of the blue. Saw my psychiatrist today and found out I have Panic Disorder. Holy hell. 😒
[Discussion] Post-canadian thanksgiving support...
/u/daeboo [5ft1/80lbs]
Created: Mon Oct 10 16:58:00 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56uyd8/postcanadian_thanksgiving_support/
---
Happy thanksgiving to all the Canadians on this sub. Love and good wishes to everyone else who will be fasting tomorrow as a consequence.
[Rant/Rave] Newbie rant cause I'm really tired...
/u/pencilwonder [175cm | why | NB]
Created: Mon Oct 10 16:49:30 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56uwvp/newbie_rant_cause_im_really_tired/
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This is also an intro I guess? Dunno how to tag it but whatevz...
Does anyone else feel like theyre too casual about this?
I feel like at the start of this entire restricting/whatever mess I was careful, counted everything, bla bla yadda yadda.
Now it's like *dont eat this dont eat that, ok this should be under 500 thats okay for today, oh okay a "binge", why is this a binge you havent even gone over maintenance lol you dumb bitch, but its okay youll just eat 300 tomorrow its fine*
I'm really a mess and I don't know what to do about it anymore.
[Help] Just had 5 atkins bars. big on the malitol. am i gonna make it?
/u/bloodketosexmagic
Created: Mon Oct 10 16:41:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56uvl2/just_had_5_atkins_bars_big_on_the_malitol_am_i/
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Am scared
[Rant/Rave] "And you said you weren't hungry! Ha"
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Oct 10 16:15:13 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56uquo/and_you_said_you_werent_hungry_ha/
---
[deleted]
[Thinspo] Grace Neutral is my thinspo
/u/wanskie [5'5 | cw: 135 | bmi: 22.5 | F]
Created: Mon Oct 10 16:09:04 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56uprb/grace_neutral_is_my_thinspo/
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http://imgur.com/a/1WYw7
[Meme/Humor] Excuse my gross feet and the icky high number, but I LOL'd at this pretty hard this morning. The number of the beast is with me today!
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Oct 10 15:54:34 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56un5r/excuse_my_gross_feet_and_the_icky_high_number_but/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/2c49fa36578d428f964bda822b03a66d?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=034028225e0ee2b7d0cb53a55555c5ef
[Tip] MOTIVATION MONDAY BEAUTIES remember: positive vibes + a positive mind = 1 step closer to reaching your GW
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Oct 10 15:51:13 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56umju/motivation_monday_beauties_remember_positive/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/dba6ec1b124d4183bc01ae8489ebc5b6?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=686b89f53231f6b83b2c6657927ae2ee
Hi, need your help.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Oct 10 15:23:00 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56uh6q/hi_need_your_help/
---
[deleted]
[Discussion] Are we allowed to share our/our favourite tumblrs?
/u/Wildrumpus273172
Created: Mon Oct 10 15:04:12 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56udoa/are_we_allowed_to_share_ourour_favourite_tumblrs/
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(I can't flair, I'm on mobile)
Edit: so okay, I used to have a thinspo Tumblr a few years ago and it's super helpful... if anyone wants to be tumblr buddies you can follow me at apri-c0ts
My mom is catching on
/u/KajaIsForeverAlone [height:5'9 | CW: 147 BMI:21 | weight lost:15 lbs | Gender: F]
Created: Mon Oct 10 15:00:33 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56ucwa/my_mom_is_catching_on/
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[removed]
[Other] Problems I have with my fat body will probably motivate you.
/u/High_as_red [5'4 | F]
Created: Mon Oct 10 14:33:12 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56u7ow/problems_i_have_with_my_fat_body_will_probably/
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I fall under a BMI of 29.30- obese. Because I have severe BED and consume about 5000 calories every night when the rest sleep. Because I rapidly gained the weight I'm very aware of all the little devils.
Stretch marks. I'm not even 20 years old and I have these red satans and even if I lose a thousand pounds bikini's are out forever.
I have to walk with my feet sortof outward because my thighs are so big they push eachother away and my ankles are about shoulder-width apart at all times.
When I wear shorts, all the shaving between my tjighs create this hard rash. It's really uncomfterable.
The stretchy top part of pants ( I have nonidea what those are in english. ) Okay so I have narrow hips and a stomach like (.) So when the stretchy part is where it's supposed to be it pushes my fat into a muffin top and it's way too embarresing to leave like that. So I pull the stretchy part over my bottom roll of fat- and because of the (.) It doesn't stay put. It's ALWAYS rolling down slowly.
Dresses. I cant wear dresses because my hip dips are so exaggerated by my love handles. I look like a lava lamp and usualy the tight part of the dress that goes around your ribs will NOT go over my fat shoulders.
Ass. My ass gets.. pushed in by all the fat surrounding it. Even if I do my squats like a bad bitch I can't escape all of the expanding mush that is my back fat and upper ham fat. Think violet in Charlie and the chocolate factory. I'd probably eat that whole factory.
My feet and knees and back always hurt. I'm not even 20 years old.
Running gets harder every day and not easier. I have been running for 4 years and the same distance for 3 months and instead of it getting easier as my fitness increases, it gets harder as my weight increases. So litterly no reward or high from exercising.
Bad posture. I have taught myself rounded shoulders because it hides my stomach better subconsiously. When I noticed and tried to fix it infront of a mirror I noticed when my shoulders go back my stomach pushes out. And we can't have that.
I never know my size. And nothing ever fits. I have 300 shirts and not one fits.
Being fat is a lot harder than resisting that spaghetti.
26 hours into my fast.
/u/BlackGirlSteeze
Created: Mon Oct 10 14:21:38 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56u5ez/26_hours_into_my_fast/
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[removed]
[Rant/Rave] Gained weight over the weekend.
/u/Wildrumpus273172
Created: Mon Oct 10 14:01:18 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56u1dq/gained_weight_over_the_weekend/
---
How the hell did I gain 2 pounds in 2 days???? I'm sure some of it is bloat but what difference does it make? 🙄 Oh well... *chugs black coffee*
[Goal] Fasting for the day: bottles of water, pieces of gum, cigs, cups of coffee
/u/diamond_sourpatchkid [5'2" | 130 | 24.6 | -10 | F]
Created: Mon Oct 10 13:56:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56u0hx/fasting_for_the_day_bottles_of_water_pieces_of/
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https://i.redd.it/j54tzygycpqx.jpg
[Discussion] Tip on fighting medication munchies
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Oct 10 13:47:39 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56tyqb/tip_on_fighting_medication_munchies/
---
[deleted]
[Discussion] Dealing with headaches caused by hunger.
/u/wattshername [5'7" | 143 | 22.4 | Not enough | F]
Created: Mon Oct 10 13:42:00 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56txm6/dealing_with_headaches_caused_by_hunger/
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Hello lovelies!
I've jumped back on restricting since I've gained back almost all of the weight I have lost within a year span. Recently I've noticed that I'm very irritable from the headaches I get when restricting. They also make it difficult to find motivation to exercise or do anything that doesn't involve laying around my apartment.
If anyone could offer any advice or tips to help keep these headaches in check I would greatly appreciate it!
[Thinspo] Daily Thinspo.
/u/BlackGirlSteeze
Created: Mon Oct 10 13:26:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56tuf9/daily_thinspo/
---
https://i.reddituploads.com/0d062980623644bfba5181f6c53212ea?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=a957f36ff83eb44f84d6ace143f541ad
[Discussion] DAE feel like their body is not their own?
/u/jippityjuniper [5'7" | 148 | 23.10 | -20 | F]
Created: Mon Oct 10 13:12:52 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56trq6/dae_feel_like_their_body_is_not_their_own/
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I don't really know how to describe this, but I often feel as though my mind and body are two separate entities.
Almost...like I could be a tiny little speck of dust if it weren't for this large heavy thing attached to me holding me down? But, that's not quite right either. I know this is my body, obviously, I can touch it and I feel the touch and I move it and all that and I know I'm the driver of this body, but it's almost like I got the wrong one? A mix-up in the factory line, maybe? This doesn't feel like my home, where I belong.
I don't know if it comes from the strong feeling of dislike/almost hatred that I have for this body, but it just doesn't feel right to say it's MY body, because it just feels like A body, not MY body..
It's a really odd feeling to explain, but maybe someone else out there gets what I'm feeling?
[Discussion] Adderall/amphetamine (discussion)
/u/KajaIsForeverAlone [height:5'9 | CW: 147 BMI:21 | weight lost:15 lbs | Gender: F]
Created: Mon Oct 10 12:50:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56tn2w/adderallamphetamine_discussion/
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Do any of you take Adderall? How much do you take and do you stack with caffeine? Does it get you high or do you take it for add? Any interesting experiences?
[Goal] Day 1 of 21.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Oct 10 12:13:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56tfc8/day_1_of_21/
---
[deleted]
[Help] Can someone please explain what an EC stack is?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Oct 10 11:47:42 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56ta8u/can_someone_please_explain_what_an_ec_stack_is/
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[deleted]
[Thinspo] My mom is my thinspo
/u/tallskinnywannabe8
Created: Mon Oct 10 11:35:50 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56t7tq/my_mom_is_my_thinspo/
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http://imgur.com/ui83Pre
[Other] 10 new Halo Top flavors released!!
/u/InSkyLimitEra [5' 7.25" | HW 180 | CW 111 | LW 111 | 29 F]
Created: Mon Oct 10 11:35:20 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56t7pg/10_new_halo_top_flavors_released/
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http://i.imgur.com/kQvCADs.jpg
[Intro] Back in the gameee
/u/feelingpeakyy [5'3 | 95lbs | 16.7 | F]
Created: Mon Oct 10 11:30:14 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56t6on/back_in_the_gameee/
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[removed]
[Rant/Rave] I Hate This Body
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Oct 10 10:49:10 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56sy9v/i_hate_this_body/
---
[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] It's only Monday and I'm over by 300 calories
/u/Laricia [5'4" | 108 | -2 | GW 95 | F]
Created: Mon Oct 10 10:29:42 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56sufm/its_only_monday_and_im_over_by_300_calories/
---
I've been doing good keeping under 600 the past three weeks, after struggling for months before to even stay below maintenance, plus frequent binges.
Was offered a bag of Subway cookies in the evening, in the middle of really frustrating work (not an excuse though) and I caved. But you know what, I'm not about to beat myself up. My taste buds enjoyed it, it fuelled me through working late. This is just a stepping stone to ensure I'm even more on track than ever. We can do this.
[Discussion] "Hey are you going to lunch?"
/u/bloodyunderwear [5'4" | 113 | 19.4 | -7 | 20F]
Created: Mon Oct 10 10:23:15 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56st5k/hey_are_you_going_to_lunch/
---
~~Haha no I'm not eating solid food today!~~
Haha no I'm gonna go do some work before my next class!
This freshman in one of my classes is SO not coy + waits for me after class just to ask me to lunch. 1. I don't eat lunch and 2. I have a boyfriend but I don't think either of those are very nice reasons to give for saying no! I can't always be doing work, lol. How do you guys shrug off those PYM (persistent young men)???
[Help] Quitting EC Stacks
/u/cheeekyslug [5'6" | BF: 26% | - 55lbs | 19/F]
Created: Mon Oct 10 10:15:59 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56srrc/quitting_ec_stacks/
---
I've been EC stacking since July and I am realizing that there are days that I can go without them. Another reason is that all the local pharmacies have stopped carrying Primatene or they will tell me that they only have one box left, and I go through them so quickly. I started using Bronkaid and love it but the closest pharmacy that sells it is 40 miles away.
I went off on them a couple of days ago because I was starting to realize that I could try to go cold turkey and just restrict on my own. It is pretty hard, but I usually just jug some water and eat a small snack and feel fine.
The problem is, I cannot exercise without them. I can only run because of EC stacks. But I'm wondering if I do a combo of higher restricting + less exercise will it be easier to run, given that I will probably lose weight anyways?
I was also thinking that if I'm consistent with this pattern that it will eventually become a habit where my eating habits will eventually form to higher restriction.
Has anyone else quit EC stacking or have successfully lost weight without them?
[Discussion] Daily Food Diary! October 10, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Mon Oct 10 10:03:04 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56sp52/daily_food_diary_october_10_2016/
---
This is a daily food diary thread for October 10, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
[Rant/Rave] Eating disordered alcoholic or alcoholic eating disordered? Who knows.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Oct 10 10:02:21 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56sp0h/eating_disordered_alcoholic_or_alcoholic_eating/
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[deleted]
[Hand] My day so far - matte and Monster 👌🏼
/u/wearebulletproof [5'4 | fat | 20F🎀✨]
Created: Mon Oct 10 09:45:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56slr4/my_day_so_far_matte_and_monster/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/6b62bd319dce4daf995430400dfcf425?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=5fe9a42a5dd091fbd85cda333a709f61
[Rant/Rave] [Rant] It's all wrong. I need motivation
/u/mace__face [5'6 | CW:112 | BMI:18.08 | GW:108 | F -16lbs]
Created: Mon Oct 10 08:08:01 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56s49q/rant_its_all_wrong_i_need_motivation/
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Sorry in advance for the shameless rant and the formatting, but....
I feel like I'm failing at life. Like everything and the one thing I felt I could control is food (most of the time anyways). I usually eat one meal a day, saving calories and whatnot and usually I restrict to 900/day. Lately though my days have been looking more like 1200 which is fucking awful. For goodness sake I just ate 450 kcals worth of peanuts, what the hell is wrong with me?!
The other day I was out with my boyfriend and I got super dizzy. He knows I've lost a lot of weight recently so he told me the dizziness is from that and to gain 5 lbs. I couldn't hide the look of utter horror and disgust on my face. There's no way I can tell him the truth about having an ED, he would never understand.
All this sounds contradictory yeah? Failing at restricting yet getting dizzy blah blah blah. I have no idea where I stand weight wise (no scale, too poor to buy one). I can't seem to win and I can see the extra weight on my thighs and obliques. So my solution is fasting for the foreseeable future. Not 7 days, not 30- indefinitely. Until I can look in the mirror and not hate myself which by my calculations won't be for a long time, maybe ever.
Sorry for ranting, I just needed to get that out. Any encouraging words or your favorite thinspo is greatly appreciated 💜
TDLR; fucking up restricting, gaining weight in the worst possible areas and yet the bf is still worried/suspicious. Fast of indeterminate time to ensue. Wish me luck
[Other] My shadow
/u/Avadakaboom [5'8.5" | 135lbs | 19.94 | -95 | F]
Created: Mon Oct 10 07:49:37 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56s1a5/my_shadow/
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http://imgur.com/zwkGq0N
[Goal] it's Monday morning. Who else is starting fresh today?!
/u/melcatx
Created: Mon Oct 10 06:46:00 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56rrxu/its_monday_morning_who_else_is_starting_fresh/
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I have been so disgusting lately and gained 2 lb. I hate looking at myself. I was only 3 lb away from being underweight and now I'm 5. It is nasty. Who else is starting anew today?! I figured I would post my plan, if others are starting anything new please comment and maybe I will join you!!
Goals:
short term: By Halloween, 113.0. Will be a new low weight that I have been wanting for a long time.
medium term: thanksgiving, I want my parents to notice I am losing again. 110.0!! (111.0 is underweight so i may reward myself when i reach it)
long term: christmas, I hope certain family members comment on my weight loss. ULTIMATE goal weight: 107.0 lb.
I have been an idiot about logging my
calories so I am going to be strict about it again. NO MORE than 1000 cals a day,
and on Tuesdays and Thursdays, I want to try and have 300.
Love you guys!! I am going to do this. I'm not going to let myself down.
[Thinspo] I would kill for that waist...
/u/probablywithmydog [5'2 | 105lbs | 19.89 (new) | -6lbs | F]
Created: Mon Oct 10 06:18:29 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56ro8g/i_would_kill_for_that_waist/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/11ae46b4d35d40fdb6bc8ea6e633ddfa?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=ac5e3c2a2c0713ba755303a8aef02b9f
[Thinspo] [Thinspo] I would kill for that waist...
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Oct 10 06:16:44 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56ro07/thinspo_i_would_kill_for_that_waist/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/ce14fe10689a4887b5d2a7db5afceab7?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=358e361f4a95ea7eb42d3cd3a8d12651
[Discussion] Weekly Stats Update! October 10, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Mon Oct 10 06:03:50 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56rmam/weekly_stats_update_october_10_2016/
---
This is the weekly status thread for October 10, 2016.
The weekly status thread is to help motivate our users, and to eventually see how far they've come! Be it for weight loss, weight gain, or maintaining- everyone is welcome. Previous updates are archived [here.](http://www.reddit.com/r/proED/wiki/archives)
Please include the following information (with all necessary units of measurement):
* Height:
* Current weight (CW):
* Highest weight (HW):
* Lowest weight (LW):
* Goal weight (GW):
* Ultimate goal weight (UGW):
* Weight lost (WL):
* BMI: ([Use this to calculate your BMI](https://people.maths.ox.ac.uk/trefethen/bmi_calc.html))
* Age:
* Gender expression:
Here's a handy-dandy copy/paste of the above format:
* Height:
* CW:
* HW:
* LW:
* GW:
* UGW:
* WL:
* BMI:
* Age:
* Gender expression:
*****
Status threads are posted every Monday.
Have any questions or concerns? Comment below, or [PM the mods.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FproED)
[Rant/Rave] Do I hate myself?
/u/Skinnytw [5'6 | 110 |17.8| F]
Created: Mon Oct 10 05:57:29 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56rlgh/do_i_hate_myself/
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When I feel depressed, I tend to push my boyfriend away with bad behavior. Basically I become a huge bitch. I get unreasonable and emotional. I am so afraid he'll leave someday, and when this feeling overwhelms me, my basic instinct is to run. To shut him out. To protect myself. I know this behavior can make it come true. I think I do this with everything in life. When I feel uncomfortable I build a wall, I want to run, I shut everyone out, I postpone important things. I have built a wall between me and a lot of people. I am slowly losing all my friends. And it's getting worse. Bad days come more often and more intense. I feel more and more uncomfortable around people, and then I don't want to hang out with them anymore. I'm afraid there will be a day when I'll be completely alone. And it will be completely my own fault.
My boyfriend told me he would like to fuck other girls. I cried for about 12 hours straight. I made him want it. I am not sexy, I never behave sexy, I don't want sex with him anymore because I feel so unattractive. And I don't know how to tell him how I feel. I tried, he didn't listen. I hate how it makes me feel, but I know I can solve it.
I thought, if I could only be skinny, maybe I could feel confident again. In the past few years I have lost weight, gained weight, lost it again, gained it again... My self worth decreases with every pound I gain, but it doesn't increase by losing them. So now I am at an all time low. I am always at an all time low. And just when I think it can't get worse, I lose my self control and gain weight. I have thought about suicide numerous times. Very often I don't want to live anymore.
I thought I hated myself. I have a huge aversion to myself. But, saying I hate myself means I know why, it means I know which parts of me I hate. But then I could change them. I would know who I want to be. But I can be completely comfortable when I am alone. I just hate who I am when I am with others. I hate who I am when I am uncomfortable. I hate who I am when I can't be myself, whoever that may be. I want to be a nice person. I want people to like me. I want them to want to hang out with me. I want to have the feeling I can be here, that I have something to say that the world would want to hear. I just don't know where to start to become that person and I don't know why I'm not. I hate that I am not the person that others would like, but I can't say I hate myself because of it, because I don't know who that person would be. I hate how I think sometimes, how I behave when I am around others, but I can't hate myself because of it, because I know my thoughts are not rational. I know I wouldn't behave like this if I had a lot of time to think about what I should do or say.
I feel like right now everything I am is my fucked up eating habits (I hesitate to call it an ED, I feel like a fraud when I do). The desire to be skinny. My obsession to feel hungry and empty. It's the only thing I can control. The only thing I know how to. I might never feel pretty, I might never feel skinny, but without goals life is useless... I hate my body, I hate how much fat I carry around, but I don't think that it's a reason to hate myself. Because losing weight doesn't make me feel better about myself...
I'm sorry for the long post. If you have read all of it, thank you. I hope you understand the way I reason. I hope it might help you. To me, saying: "I don't hate myself", feels like a huge step, even though I am still so far from even saying that I like myself.
I love you all. I love this sub.
**tldr;** I am not who I want to be, I'm a mess, but I don't think I can say that I hate myself.
[Meme/Humor] 100% Accurate lol
/u/morose_adipose [5'2 | 90 lbs | 17.05 | F]
Created: Mon Oct 10 05:42:26 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56rjum/100_accurate_lol/
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https://i.redd.it/9lbzlcyswmqx.jpg
[Discussion] Therapist said to cover my binge foods in something i hate to eat.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Oct 10 05:35:47 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56rj4w/therapist_said_to_cover_my_binge_foods_in/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] Anxiety attack followed by binge. I fn hate the people i work with. (rant)
/u/hibbokzy
Created: Mon Oct 10 03:50:20 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56r8sw/anxiety_attack_followed_by_binge_i_fn_hate_the/
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I was so happy over the weekend. I restricted perfectly to get down to within 1.5kg of my GW. Then I remembered I had to go to work today (Monday)...
Queue 5 hours of panic and anxiety from 10pm to about 3am when I think I passed out from exhaustion. During the day at work its easy to restrict because I hate everyone, don't talk to anyone, and do my own thing...even if my workmates are the most passive aggressive incompetent fuckwit assholes that walked the earth... Then I get home and I get comfort and support from the hubsby and it turns me into an emotional wreck and I drink and binge, drink and binge... FML.
This is why I cant have nice things. Niceness makes me fucking soft. I should be hard. God knows I've had enough trauma to be a stone cold biatch.... Sometimes I wonder what the point of it all is. Am I supposed to have an awesome fulfilled life, or suffer and die alone and miserable? Nothing makes sense.
Fark. That is all.
[Help] Help! Lunches at work?
/u/stillweighting [5'4 | CW 130 | GW 99 | LW 107 | F]
Created: Mon Oct 10 03:12:51 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56r5fi/help_lunches_at_work/
---
Hello lovely people <3
(Can't flair as on mobile)
I was wondering if anyone had any very low cal recipes or ideas for lunches while at work? There's only so many times I can eat half a tin of soup hahaa
Thanks guys xx
[Discussion] Weekend binges?
/u/fuckyeahglitters [5'7 | 126 | 19.87 | -30 | F]
Created: Mon Oct 10 01:28:07 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56qvw6/weekend_binges/
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Okay, so I've been repeating this cycle for a couple of weeks now. I'm a very good girl during the weekdays, restricting and losing. About every Friday I'm very proud of my accomplishments when I see the numbers go down. But then the weekend kicks in and, while I used to just get my calories from drinking during the weekend, I've become a horrible binging monster. I've noticed others in this sub do the same. So what are you thoughts on weekend binges and do you have any tips or tricks on how to put a stop on this? Any input is appreciated, or if you just wanna talk about similar experiences, that is definitely fine :)
[Help] Shin splints, why?
/u/Polski_lesbian [5'2.5 | 124.2 | 22.6 | Q]
Created: Mon Oct 10 01:04:56 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56qti8/shin_splints_why/
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I won't be able to jog for at least a week or two, and I already overate yesterday from the annoyance and anxiety :/ Anyone got any good exercises I can do? Oh, just no exercises that place stress on my legs please, I'm dying here :)
[Discussion] Who's your standard?
/u/m_inimal
Created: Mon Oct 10 00:59:14 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56qsv2/whos_your_standard/
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Who is a person in your life, or a celebrity that you know of, that you look at and think "That person is at the ideal weight."? For aesthetic reasons or otherwise. How close is your own actual body to that standard you hold, and how does that make you feel?
Just some questions I thought would be interesting to ask. My answer would be Marion Cotillard, specifically as she appears in this French film ["Two Days One Night"](http://image.nola.com/home/nola-media/width960/img/tpphotos/photo/2015/02/10/-886c32e181b0c86a.jpg). I was going to say Audrey Hepburn at first, but that seemed a little too extreme. Her waist is startlingly small.
As for my own body, it looks nothing like Marion Cotillard's, especially in this movie. Her body will probably always be better than mine no matter how much weight I lose, because I have a wide ribcage, short legs, and a round face. That thought makes me sad :( But then I remember I can still be MY best self, and that's still good for something! haha
[Help] Has anyone tried the weight-loss pill Alli?
/u/chocolatecoveredpugs [5'4| 118| 20.6 | -22lbs | F]
Created: Sun Oct 9 23:46:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56qkxk/has_anyone_tried_the_weightloss_pill_alli/
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[removed]
[Help] Freaking out about my thighs.
/u/salamanderqueen [5'9"| CW: 149 | SW: 180 | GW: 120 | -31 | 19F]
Created: Sun Oct 9 23:39:42 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56qk38/freaking_out_about_my_thighs/
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My thighs have always been the biggest part of me. Seriously, it feels like ALL of my weight gain goes to my thighs. But I've lost over 30 lbs, and they still look the same. I've been taking my measurements for a few months now, and since the beginning of July I've only lost 3.75" off my thighs. They seriously look like beach balls glued to me. At what point will they start to slim out? Are there any exercises I can do to speed the process up? I'm seriously losing my mind over this.
[Goal] Want my old body back :(
/u/frailraven [5'10 | CW 117 | LW 115 | F20]
Created: Sun Oct 9 23:23:32 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56qi1f/want_my_old_body_back/
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http://i.imgur.com/OYrkQae.jpg
[Tip] PSA: Even for tall girls -8 lbs is a big difference
/u/Pipoen [5'9" | 131 | 19.35 | -30 | =^u^= ]
Created: Sun Oct 9 23:22:28 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56qhw6/psa_even_for_tall_girls_8_lbs_is_a_big_difference/
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http://imgur.com/l347ukx
[Rant/Rave] I feel so sick (vent warning)
/u/KajaIsForeverAlone [height:5'9 | CW: 147 BMI:21 | weight lost:15 lbs | Gender: F]
Created: Sun Oct 9 22:37:39 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56qbte/i_feel_so_sick_vent_warning/
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I feel so awful ;~; I feel sick and fat and I'm a failure. I've been binging all weekend and Im starting to break down. I feel so alone. I feel like cutting again and I'm not going to eat until I'm thin enough.
Im jealous. My friend admitted to having a crush on this really thin girl that's the coolest prettiest girl I've ever seen. I'm jealous of him liking her because I feel like I like him but also her but maybe I don't but I dont know. I don't know anything anymore
I can't find bronkaid for the life of me. I might start taking a ton more Adderall and caffeine
Im just so done with everything
If this isn't allowed here then by all means tell me, I'm sorry.
I don't know where else to turn
[Other] So happy!
/u/xtabbithax
Created: Sun Oct 9 22:32:06 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56qb0q/so_happy/
---
I lost 5lbs this week! It's not much, but I worked hard for it!
[Thinspo] Goodnight Thinspo.
/u/BlackGirlSteeze
Created: Sun Oct 9 22:02:44 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56q6mu/goodnight_thinspo/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/2ee978b15b054110877a315cc161d63c?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=899975dc0e9c8ecea27d568b9fe848f0
[Meme/Humor] When u have ED but ur having period cravings :))))))))
/u/sprinkle1997 [5'2 | CW 129 GW 100 | -25 lbs | 19F]
Created: Sun Oct 9 21:57:53 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56q5tz/when_u_have_ed_but_ur_having_period_cravings/
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http://imgur.com/c3wA6kM
[Thinspo] My BF left his shirt in my room & I sent him this pic. I binged all weekend & felt extremely chubby/hopeless but seeing it corrected some of that body distortion. Monday=fresh beginning.
/u/fckk [5'4| CW 120lbs | 20.60 | GW 115 | F]
Created: Sun Oct 9 21:41:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56q36p/my_bf_left_his_shirt_in_my_room_i_sent_him_this/
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http://i.imgur.com/YbgDg6p.jpg
[Rant/Rave] Nope, that wasn't it. (Rant)
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Oct 9 21:26:12 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56q0rl/nope_that_wasnt_it_rant/
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[deleted]
creating some things?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Oct 9 21:21:18 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56pzxr/creating_some_things/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] Feeling like a failure.
/u/frailraven [5'10 | CW 117 | LW 115 | F20]
Created: Sun Oct 9 20:40:45 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56psu9/feeling_like_a_failure/
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just ordered a scale to get back to where i was in march. i also ordered an appetite suppressant (glucomannan) and caffeine pills on two days shipping. i need to get to get to 110.
[Help] I feel like the most dysfunctional bulimic ever and I can't take it anymore
/u/throwawaytodayokc
Created: Sun Oct 9 20:13:45 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56poak/i_feel_like_the_most_dysfunctional_bulimic_ever/
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I was supposed to go camping but had three days of isolated, nearly non-stop binging and purging instead. I am up 8.8 lbs after 3 days of binging and lazy purging. Literally hours upon hours, living out of a motel this weekend while my roommate thought I was camping. I cannot tolerate these periods and I feel like I have reached the point where the only rational solution is suicide.
Years. And years of this. Sixteen years, I must be a glutton for self-destruction. Every once in a while, I can get underweight but then my true greedy, sick self emerges and I am this monster that cannot stop. I am going to be a statistic...EDs have the highest mortality rate of all mental illness, and I am going to be a data point. This is it. I feel like it is over, this waste of a life. I want to die before I gain even more weight. My lack of control feels terrifying.
My whole life is a mess and I don't have anything other than this. I don't see the light. I can't breathe and I am sad that I will need to end it all soon but this is reality.
I am so sorry, mom, dad, to my sister and anyone who has ever given me a chance. But I am too far gone. Unrepairable. Before I fucking die, I might as well max my credit card on a personal trainer to lose weight.
I need to be alive for my sister's wedding and a major office meeting, but after that I truly don't see a point anymore.
Had an unexpected surprise..
/u/peanutbutteredbanana
Created: Sun Oct 9 19:47:56 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56pjxw/had_an_unexpected_surprise/
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I just weighed in at 90 pounds, a new LW. I thought I was 95 and I'm so happy right now!! This week I've felt so suicidal and I think I'm becoming depressed again but this just changed my mood around so quickly. I feel like I'm invincible and that I'm on top of the world. Too bad tomorrow I'll wake up feeling like a fat piece of shit again lmao, gotta love EDs...
[Rant/Rave] I've been eating like crap and today I can't stop looking at my stomach.
/u/kinaadman [5'1" | SW 210 | CW 110 | GW: 90 | F]
Created: Sun Oct 9 18:55:53 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56pbj4/ive_been_eating_like_crap_and_today_i_cant_stop/
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It probably doesn't help that I, a stupid person, chose to wear high-waist pants from Top Shop. Or that I bought them at all on a week where I know I've been eating like shit and am bloated. My great aunt, who raised me, died this week and I've been comfort eating and it just hasn't been pretty. I'm probably going to semi-fast today and then head to the gym for two hours of Muay Thai after work. I don't know if I can NOT eat at all today (I've already had breakfast) but I am hoping to at least limit to 500-600 cals today. Wish me luck.
College Applications
/u/smallpaint [6'2" | 170lb | M]
Created: Sun Oct 9 18:54:37 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56pbb7/college_applications/
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Anyone else just want to eat frosting and french toast until they die and escape the crushing stress of applying to universities? :))
[Rant/Rave] Weird food day. (Tmi)
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Oct 9 18:43:47 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56p9nj/weird_food_day_tmi/
---
[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] Not a smoker, but I totally get why people are.
/u/depressionbunny [5'6" | 138 | 22.6 | -12 | FM]
Created: Sun Oct 9 18:29:03 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56p7eb/not_a_smoker_but_i_totally_get_why_people_are/
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I am not a smoker and I never have been.
Right now it is 8 pm on a Sunday. I'm sitting in a 24-hour coffeehouse writing out a case-study dude tomorrow morning at 10 am. To my left is a table comprised of young, exotic (maybe Chile or Columbia?) stylish, and incredibly svelte bohemian intellectuals consulting each other over a single mac book.
All together they stepped outside for a smoke break. Gotdammit, they looked so fahking cool. Just standing their with their long denim clad legs, piercings, and paracords; smoking some kind of organic cigarettes in between strings of dialogue a latin-based tongue; looking all classic and cheekbony.
I've had a grueling week between work and school and I've restricted consistently, but that only enhances the total mind-body fatigue presently clouding my focus.
I don't want to eat- not even all that hungry to be honest. The buzz of my adderall and caffeine isn't doing it for me.
I don't like the stank of burnt tobacco on my clothes and skin, nor the filmy aftertaste in my mouth.
I know its bad for overall health, stamina, and appearance.
Cigarettes are bad, mmmkay. I get it.
But FUCK. I wish I had something to puff on right now. Just a little buzzy buzz to get me through this.
*send me good vibes plz*
Probably TMI
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Oct 9 18:18:30 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56p5q8/probably_tmi/
---
[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] binged and now i feel terrible
/u/hopedarawrasaurus [5'2"| 150 | 28 | -29 | F]
Created: Sun Oct 9 18:12:02 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56p4lz/binged_and_now_i_feel_terrible/
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just had a massive binge. I feel so so shitty. And of course I immediately stepped on the scale after and I'm up like 8 pounds. I wanna die I can't believe I just did this. I feel like I've ruined everything I've worked for. And I hate fasting but I know I need to. Why do I do this to myself? I wanna die. I wish I could purge but I physically can't. I don't even wanna leave my room to throw away the remnants. I'm so embarrassed.
[Thinspo] Would anyone be interested in me posting a reverse thinspo album of myself?
/u/TiredOfBeingFat_ [6'0"| CW251 |BMI34 | 22lost | GW130]
Created: Sun Oct 9 18:05:59 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56p3n1/would_anyone_be_interested_in_me_posting_a/
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[removed]
[Discussion] I'm starting the HSGD tomorrow and I have a whole Excel sheet ready to track it...I might be actually insane.
/u/onlyroom_forthin [5'6 | CW:149.6 | 24.24 | SW:165 | UGW:120 | F]
Created: Sun Oct 9 17:54:06 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56p1sc/im_starting_the_hsgd_tomorrow_and_i_have_a_whole/
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Seriously, I am the most type-A human being alive. I love to plan stuff. I had an Excel file for my undergrad where I planned out all 4 years of classes (which turned into five, whoops), and a sheet for each year where I kept track of my grades and GPA. I'm crazy. I'm also doing a master's now and am taking a lot of classes about data analysis, which is not my main focus but I love because I think it's so cool.
So I'm starting the Healthy Skinny Girl Diet tomorrow (extended version that is 90 days, ideal to keep me on track over the holidays) and the Excel sheet I made for it is insanely detailed and I love it. I don't like just crossing off "day one, day two" kind of tracking because I lose track really easily, so I have columns for the date, day of the week, and # of calories. I also have a place to type in how many calories I actual eat, and then set it up so the next column has a big green YES or big red NO depending on if I stay under the right number of calories or not. Then I also have rows calculating the average # of calories over the whole thing, and have another space for the green yes/red no based on if I'm on track to sucessfully complete the diet (based on being at or under the calorie intake for at least 90% of the time).
I'm insane and I love it.
[Rant/Rave] Guess who's back, back again...
/u/dongledongs [5'6" | 137 lbs | -14 | GW 115 | 22.11 | F]
Created: Sun Oct 9 17:35:24 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56oyt1/guess_whos_back_back_again/
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My ED's back, please don't tell my friends :''')
I missed the support of this subreddit so much. Like, I'll start restricting anyway, it's not like this subreddit encourages me to do so, I don't think people from an outside perspective understand that. Coming here makes me hate myself a little less and at least find safer ways to do what I would do anyway.
Anyway, what is it about fall that just makes me pack on the pounds? I'm like, invincible during the summer, and then I come back to school and gain 10 lbs even though I'm exercising so much more. I feel like I'm going crazy sometimes. I was on the verge of starting up my ED habits, and then my roommate asked me if I wanted to fast with her for Yam Kippur and I think something in my brain just clicked when she said that. I love using my ED as a punishment and something about fasting for your sins feels AWESOME. I started a little early because I'm pretty sure I've sinned a whole lot lmao.
Whew, feels good to get that off my chest because I know it's really fucked up. I'm so glad I have this community at least so I don't feel so alone all the time. I hope everyone's having a nice October so far!
[Tip] Love this tea for when I have sweet cravings!
/u/apologeticdoe [5'4" | 147 | 25.23 | -8 | F]
Created: Sun Oct 9 17:33:41 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56oyjn/love_this_tea_for_when_i_have_sweet_cravings/
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Tazo passion tea is pretty sweet tasting and helps for when I'm craving those empty calories like skittles. Now if only it helped during that time of the month when I am dying for chocolate...
[Meme/Humor] How bad do you wanns be bones this halloween? (xpost from makeup addiction)
/u/GrammarNaughtsy [5'3" | 102 | GW: 98 | F]
Created: Sun Oct 9 17:23:19 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56oww7/how_bad_do_you_wanns_be_bones_this_halloween/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/0265d036c7184e978ad2a5acc0f03f0e?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=4575e8e918328517edd74653f7db3408
How bad do you wanns be bones this halloween? (xpost from makeup addiction)
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Oct 9 17:23:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56owv9/how_bad_do_you_wanns_be_bones_this_halloween/
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[deleted]
[Help] Very low calorie won't permanently damage my metabolism?
/u/hunterxgreen [5'4'' | too much | ditto | -22 | F | ]
Created: Sun Oct 9 17:15:28 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56ovpj/very_low_calorie_wont_permanently_damage_my/
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I'm on mobile so I can't flair at the moment but I've read so many studies and I know starvation mode and all that is bull but I've just had it drilled into me the VLC will slow my metabolism. I know a decrease in weight is a decrease in BMR, but nothing beyond that? Or permanent? I won't ruin my metabolism? I still restrict but I want a greater deficit and just need some reassurance xx
[Goal] Sleep well beautiful people - tomorrow brings a fresh week to start again and reach your goals
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Oct 9 17:14:20 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56ovjo/sleep_well_beautiful_people_tomorrow_brings_a/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] [rant] endless snacking this weekend ruining me
/u/thinkthinlythrowaway
Created: Sun Oct 9 16:27:14 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56onwa/rant_endless_snacking_this_weekend_ruining_me/
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I'm dying with this whole eat whenever I think I'm hungry thing
I enjoy the waiting until dinner to eat a meal a day
I enjoy not snacking I feel like when I start eating (specifically these toffee peanuts) it makes me hungrier and hungrier
I did so well yesterday until I went over to a friends for a cider day and I ended up eating everything in sight after 3 glasses of hard cider/hard root beer because I didn't want to get sick on an empty stomach.
Everything sucks
I want back my control
I want to lose weight constantly again
I was excited for fall but if I'm just going to be gaining I don't want to have the big sweaters and leggings since I'll already be a fat cow
[Help] Question on stacks
/u/hopelessly--hopeful [5'4" | puts whales to shame| -20 | F| 22]
Created: Sun Oct 9 16:06:14 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56okg9/question_on_stacks/
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Hey so I'm new here and want to start the EC stacks. From what I've read Bronkaid is otc and you can just walk in to a pharmacy and ask for it. I have a lot of social anxiety, so what's the best way to ask for it without raising red flags or something? I'm pretty fat so I can probably get away with people thinking it's for asthma. Also, what's the best caffeine pill to use? I know there's a lot of cheap ones, but even things like energy drinks don't do anything for me and I hate coffee. Also, does anyone have thoughts on taking a multivitamin with a stack? Looking for things I can buy in a Walgreens/CVS or at Walmart. Also looking to buy in bulk because I live on a college campus with no transportation to local stores.
I'm restricting right now to about 700 or less calories to start out. So far I've lost about 17 pounds.
[Help] question about eating back exercise calories
/u/yikes_dot_com [5'6 | 111 | 17.9 | F]
Created: Sun Oct 9 15:57:43 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56oj11/question_about_eating_back_exercise_calories/
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so many people (myself included) like to use "net" calorie counts for the day i.e. if I eat 700 but burn off 300 at the gym my total is 400. is that the same thing as having a higher TDEE if you exercise a lot? for instance, my sedentary TDEE is 1600 but because I do moderate exercise 5 times a week it increases to about 2000. does that mean on days I don't exercise I only burn 1600 calories? and if I were to eat 2400 calories but burn 400 at the gym, I would still be at maintenance, rather than if I ate 2000 because the extra 400 are already accounted for by the difference? sorry if this is confusing lol
[Discussion] ABC diet
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Oct 9 15:36:02 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56ofgn/abc_diet/
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[removed]
[Rant/Rave] God. Small starbucks rant.
/u/reggiesan [5'0" | 138 | 28.38 | -27 lbs | F | GW: 110]
Created: Sun Oct 9 15:16:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56oc5e/god_small_starbucks_rant/
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I just went to starbucks to get a venti coffee. I asked for a little room because I wanted to add some cashew milk when I got home. I open up the cup, and they already fucking mixed my drink for me! This just frustrates me so much because I don't know what they put it, half n half, milk, or cream? Or what? AND I don't know how much sugar they put in. And I have weird guilt about consuming just straight sugar. Idk. I just over counted everything on MFP. I seriously almost cried because I guess I just felt so out of control, but I know that's silly and I feel dumb typing that out. I also don't want to throw it away because I feel bad wasting the $2.86 or whatever that I paid for it. Can you tell I have a lot of issues with guilt? :P
Anyway. Rant over. I know you guys would probably understand :P
[Rant/Rave] Was robbed of a non scale victory
/u/hazelconner [5'4" | 174.5 | 33.2% BF | -15.5 | X/F]
Created: Sun Oct 9 14:56:56 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56o8m8/was_robbed_of_a_non_scale_victory/
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I was supposed to run in a 5k today but missed it due to traffic. I had a full blown melt down and I can't tell if the reason I feel so weak is the emotion or that I've been on a liquid fast for almost 24 hours.
I haven't worked out in days and I hate it. I should be able to do it tomorrow.
[Discussion] Supersize vs Superskinny: Observations
/u/pumpkinpieface [5'6 | 102.4 | 16.3 |]
Created: Sun Oct 9 13:15:01 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56nqom/supersize_vs_superskinny_observations/
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Like a lot of you, I'm obsessed with this show- it's like the perfect ED fuel and guilty pleasure- food porn (with following gross food tube demonstrations), thinspo, reverse thinspo...
I've observed a lot of similarities with the Superskinny people's diets across the episodes-
1. Lots of coffee/tea/ energy drinks. Many are caffeine addicts.
2. Living off of candy and chocolate bars. Instant sugar rush for energy. but not excess portions.
3. They usually fidget and walk a lot.
4. They are super picky eaters- they won't eat something if they don't love it.
5. Most see food as a 'bother' and not the highlight of their day like the Supersizers
7. They're really busy with their jobs and education, whereas the supersizers spend hours a day eating and cooking.
I love this show haha
edit- all of the seasons are on youtube!
I was feeling okay but thanks to my parents
/u/harleygore [5'8 | CW: 189 | GW: 170 | UGW: 110 | Female]
Created: Sun Oct 9 13:04:06 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56not8/i_was_feeling_okay_but_thanks_to_my_parents/
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I got yelled at for gaining two pounds. First by my mom in the morning, and then my dad as soon as I got home. It's great! I was feeling fine and confident and now I've been having constant anxiety since Friday. It's all good, all good. Also I'm on mobile so no flair, sorry!!
[Rant/Rave] So tired of all the bruises!
/u/scandinaviandreams [6'0" | 131 | 17.93 | F]
Created: Sun Oct 9 13:03:55 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56nos3/so_tired_of_all_the_bruises/
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I haven't had a lot of negative side effects from my weight loss (except coldness) but god damn, I get bruises SO easily! Lightly bump into the table? Congrats, giant bruise decorating your leg now!
[Discussion] Making a plan now to avoid Thanksgiving caloric regrets!
/u/mermaid_puppy [5'11" | 137lb | UGW 115 | F]
Created: Sun Oct 9 13:01:41 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56node/making_a_plan_now_to_avoid_thanksgiving_caloric/
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My thanksgiving plan:
1. Take plenty of bronkaid so I'm less tempted to binge. Also have coffee throughout the day instead of wine while I'm cooking. When I drink I lose all inhibitions and ALWAYS over eat.
2. During actual dinner, I'm going load up on salad. I'll have some turkey because that'll be a lean protein, and you look suspicious not having turkey on Thanksgiving. I'll probably put small amounts of the other traditional foods on my plate and smash them around/ have a small taste.
3. Wear some clothes that aren't the most flattering on my figure. That way I don't draw attention to my size. Hopefully my sister won't point out I'm eating less than her. Sometimes she likes to point out that I've lost weight or make comments on my eating habits. Not necessarily mean, but I want to stay under the radar as much as possible.
Any other suggestions to minimize caloric damage during the holidays?
Big victory last night
/u/erilaz- [5'7 | CW: 185 | GW: 110 | -45lbs | F]
Created: Sun Oct 9 12:50:15 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56nm99/big_victory_last_night/
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I'm on mobile so I can't flair :(
BUT. I had planned my first successful fast yesterday after I got ice cream the night before. So I go the whole day doing my thing and I'm loving the EC for pepping me up and making me not hungry. But then my friend invites me to go bowling with her bf and his friends. I said yes and while we're there people are guzzling down beer and food the whole time.
I took a tiny sip of beer because I was super thirsty, but other than that I didn't binge or eat food at all!!
For someone who thought fasting would be impossible for me a couple weeks ago, I'm super proud of myself ☺️
[Rant/Rave] I wasn't freaking out over thanksgiving until I found out my spouse had plans for us
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Oct 9 12:15:21 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56nfy3/i_wasnt_freaking_out_over_thanksgiving_until_i/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] Started Binge-Eating Again
/u/MeraxesPestis [5'2" | 241 lbs | 45.7 | -49 lbs | GQ]
Created: Sun Oct 9 11:58:24 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56ncu6/started_bingeeating_again/
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I am so down on myself right now. I hit 240.0 lbs on October 1st and went to my sister's bridal shower the next day. I ate nothing until the 4-hour drive back to my place & I'd been fasting for 4 days & started to feel pretty sick, so I pulled over at the only rest stop in 100 miles (thanks rural New England) & bought a small fry & soda.
& 8 days later I've gained 7 lbs. I used to water fast like half my days and suddenly I can't even manage more than 1 day. I've started eating in bed when I'm falling asleep again. Last night I must have eaten 1500 cals of carbs & salt & put on 4 lbs (hoping most of it is water weight because my TDEE is supposed to be 1800).
I'm trying not to be down on myself or feel guilty because I know that will only make the spiral worse & it'll be harder to get back on track but I weigh so much & it's so hard to lose & my goal was to get to 235 before my sister's bachelorette this weekend and now that's never going to happen. I can't help feeling so ashamed of myself. My mother's coming to visit for 3 days because I'm having surgery & I'm not allowed to be alone due to the anesthesia and so I'm not going to be able to try and fast this weight back off. I don't know. There's just nowhere else I can say any of this. I feel so gross.
[Thinspo] Daily Thinspo. (also my lock screen)
/u/BlackGirlSteeze
Created: Sun Oct 9 11:39:32 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56n9kn/daily_thinspo_also_my_lock_screen/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/3d4b6505ec794ddfad5f99fdec672482?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=3d1acc70d57e18ee7cbfb1fb4b76424b
[Help] Question of the Day.
/u/BlackGirlSteeze
Created: Sun Oct 9 10:37:32 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56myqi/question_of_the_day/
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What are your lowest weight, current weight, highest weight and goal weight?
[Other] "Italian Pizza delivery girl" by Kimberley Gordon
/u/Laricia [5'4" | 108 | -2 | GW 95 | F]
Created: Sun Oct 9 10:22:27 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56mw4t/italian_pizza_delivery_girl_by_kimberley_gordon/
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http://imgur.com/a/uAuUH
[Discussion] Daily Food Diary! October 09, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Sun Oct 9 10:02:28 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56msp9/daily_food_diary_october_09_2016/
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This is a daily food diary thread for October 09, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
Pro ED post high school kik group
/u/ObservingSilence
Created: Sun Oct 9 09:17:12 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56mlcq/pro_ed_post_high_school_kik_group/
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[removed]
[Goal] My goals in life
/u/probablywithmydog [5'2 | 105lbs | 19.89 (new) | -6lbs | F]
Created: Sun Oct 9 08:26:24 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56mdrj/my_goals_in_life/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/0a976a58b69049909a89cd99e6331169?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=6174e8db6f4079ff721a0e3651c0e59c
[Other] I'm on vacation rn but the WiFi is terrible, so I'm not going to be as active on here. I'll miss y'all!! 😢
/u/citrus_cunt [5' 9"| 139lbs | 19.5| +2lbs | F]
Created: Sun Oct 9 08:21:17 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56md0z/im_on_vacation_rn_but_the_wifi_is_terrible_so_im/
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😢😭😢😭😢😭😢😭
[Thinspo] Love her 💕🎀
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Oct 9 06:41:06 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56m0m7/love_her/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/39e88913156a4f968bb74efea851bbe5?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=18e66bbf53622887c98d18c799419b00
[Thinspo] Sunday Funday Inspiration
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Oct 9 06:40:24 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56m0jd/sunday_funday_inspiration/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/f0a00e5f16774eb69034e8ae8692d8b5?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=76a7f9de6343758eb8216531577b9f06
[Meme/Humor] With Halloween around the corner, here is the highest calorie drink you can order off the menu at Starbucks! #spooky
/u/HowToBeAsian25 [5'4 |113lbs |19.78 |-19 | F]
Created: Sun Oct 9 06:24:28 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56lyue/with_halloween_around_the_corner_here_is_the/
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http://imgur.com/rciM2Oi
[Rant/Rave] I'm avoiding the scale until next saturday
/u/woollyshirt [5'7.7 | 116.4lbs | 17.69 | -77.6lbs | M/NB]
Created: Sun Oct 9 05:26:39 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56ltc1/im_avoiding_the_scale_until_next_saturday/
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I've never actually intentionally done this. I've stayed with friends/gone away and felt ok about not weighing myself for a few days but to intentionally choose to not do it while at home seems pretty difficult. I've had horrible fluctuations presumably from hormone issues and I'm thinking this break might help.. Or it might make me just want to die if I haven't lost weight in this week :(
Apart from taking the battery out of my scale (family scale so not really possible) and taking measurements, do you think there's a way to make this a little easier? I'm hoping as I don't weigh in more I'll appreciate avoiding the stress over it, but I also feel like I'm trying to avoid 'reality' and making excuses for eating as much as I do and I feel kinda guilty for it- the scale keeps me accountable and i'm taking that away...
[Rant/Rave] That feel when your crush jokes about your weight
/u/Golden-Guns [5' 7" | 158 | BMI: 25 | -35 | F]
Created: Sun Oct 9 05:10:48 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56lrun/that_feel_when_your_crush_jokes_about_your_weight/
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My friends (including my crush) and I were working on some pharmacology assignments together. There was one question that went, "Excess weight gain is a problem associated with ______." Then my crush says my name as the answer and they all start laughing wildly. So, fuck you guys I guess, but thanks for triggering me to start fasting again.
[Rant/Rave] I hate being hungry when I wasn't planning on being hungry
/u/goddamnroommate [5'6" | 143.8 | 23.30 | -50ish | F]
Created: Sun Oct 9 05:06:11 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56lrg3/i_hate_being_hungry_when_i_wasnt_planning_on/
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A couple days ago I was hanging out with some friends of my bf's. I'd never met them before, but since the drive was a bit far, it was assumed we would be staying for a chunk of time (5+hrs). idk about anyone else, but usually when I'd have guests or id go to just another friend's house, there's a window for food to be offered whenever it's around that long of a visit, yknow?
I had also had no chance to prepare any food, or else I would have. It was either nothing and hope social norm dictated a food option, or bring a fucking can of tuna. and ask for a can opener.
No one offered food, and the host even went to the kitchen and grabbed something for himself. Meanwhile it's been like 8 hours since I had last eaten, and I was actually getting kind of hungry, because it wasn't that much before. And I was going crazy. It led to a mini binge later that night because my mind was just so fixated on it for the last hour and a half of the night PLUS the hour drive back. I wanted to eat eat eat.
UGH.
I don't mind low restriction. I don't mind fasting. When they are on my terms. But the minute I have to be unexpectedly hungry with no defined end point. I go insane.
/rant
[Help] Give me hope proED
/u/Pitaia [1.70cm | CW: aaaHHAHA | BMI: ? |GW: S M A L L|GQ]
Created: Sun Oct 9 04:27:48 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56lo51/give_me_hope_proed/
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I gained 2.5kgs in a week.
**A week.**
If I gained that amount in week I can lose it in just the same amount of time right? Right? Please help me you guys.
[Goal] Checking in - hit a new low!
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Oct 9 02:27:17 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56lef4/checking_in_hit_a_new_low/
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http://imgur.com/9GWOkvb
[Rant/Rave] This blows
/u/ilovepugs_ [5'6 1/2" | 149.2 | 23.7 | -4.8 | F]
Created: Sun Oct 9 00:51:53 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56l6i7/this_blows/
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Ever since I was diagnosed with BN 2 and a half weeks ago, I've halted everything. I was really on board with recovery and everything. I stopped purging, gave away all my laxatives and my scale to a trusted healthy friend, and finally found a therapist and psychiatrist that'll work with me.
But ever since then, I've felt like I have loss control of my life and everything is spinning. I haven't showed up to classes to Wednesday of last week. I haven't showered since Thursday. I haven't really left the house all that much. I've been binging nonstop. I'm convinced I've gained 10 lbs. I can see the weight on my hips and in my face.
I want it back. I want the control back. The only reason I can't purge any of my binges is because of these stupid antibiotics for my strep throat.
I'm not even thin. I'm probably within the 150's range. I really hate myself. I can't concentrate on my studies. I have no motivation. All I want to do is cry. I don't want to particularly die. But if I keep purging I'll get there sooner.
I'm a fat sack of lard.
Also, I can't flair because I'm on mobile.
[Rant/Rave] Something broke inside, and now pure guilt is driving my restricting.
/u/kpatable [5'9" | 127.4 | 18.5/18.8 | -19.6 | F]
Created: Sun Oct 9 00:10:52 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56l2mb/something_broke_inside_and_now_pure_guilt_is/
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And of course I'm glad about it. I know it's objectively unhealthy to feel so guilty about eating, but it makes restricting so much easier. Actually, I'm not even *trying* to restrict. I just am. Because I feel so guilty for eating. I don't really know what happened. I guess the past 3 months of binging a few times a week all built up and made restricting my mind's top priority. It's just weird because it feels so automatic. I guess that's an eating disorder, though.
[Discussion] Is anyone here on antidepressants/antipsychotics?
/u/yellowlettuce [5'9" | CW:152 GW:125 | -83lbs ]
Created: Sat Oct 8 23:48:10 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56l0bo/is_anyone_here_on_antidepressantsantipsychotics/
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I used to be on both. Lexapro, Lithium, Abilify, and two others I forgot. I gained like 30lbs. (this was 7 years ago)
My psychiatrist has tried starting me on Prozac, then Zoloft, but I am absolutely terrified of the weight gain side effect. He, along with my therapist and my mother, are really pushing me to begin taking an antidepressant again. I know I would benefit from one, but the weight gain is something I simply won't deal with, I've come too far, and I'm nowhere near my goal. I don't care if the weight gain is a "side effect I might not even get," it's still frightening as hell to see it even LISTED. I just won't even fucking deal with it.
I haven't told anyone my reasoning. When my psychiatrist asks why I'm "so against taking medication", I just fall silent. He then says something like "I know you must have a good reason for not wanting to, and I know you have a good reason for not wanting to share with me." I do want to tell him, but I'm just scared because I don't want him to know.
So, I guess I'm wondering if anyone here is on any sort of medication (antidepressant/antipsychotic)? If so, what/what are your experiences with it?
[Discussion] Unsure about Recovery
/u/throwaway03199519 [glob]
Created: Sat Oct 8 23:23:19 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56kxp1/unsure_about_recovery/
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is anyone like not really sure if they want to get better? I want my hair to stop thinning and i want to be healthy but i also dont want to hate my body. people are starting to get worried about me and i dont want them to.. i feel bad. I just am concerned that no matter how much i lose, ill still hate myself.
[Rant/Rave] tfw even after getting to my goal weight, i'll be ugly
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Oct 8 22:41:24 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56ksz9/tfw_even_after_getting_to_my_goal_weight_ill_be/
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[deleted]
[Discussion] Just wondered if there is any interest
/u/stella4eva
Created: Sat Oct 8 22:27:35 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56krdp/just_wondered_if_there_is_any_interest/
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So, I've been at this for long enough now that I have a good collection of self devised (I was an A* food tech student) of low calorie, yet filing and nutritious recipes. Nothing over complicated either, and whether anyone wanted me to post some up, including nutritional info of course. Many are the sort that wouldn't cause those around you to accuse you of not eating properly either, bonus. I made them for others all the time to a lot of praise. This includes dessert food as well.
[Goal] I ordered supplies
/u/-lotophagi- [5'6" | 127lbs | 20 | -8lbs | F]
Created: Sat Oct 8 22:12:27 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56kpk9/i_ordered_supplies/
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1 case of monster zero
1 huge tub of coffee
1 case of sugar free redbull
1 case of skinny pop
1 case of popchips
3 boxes of dieters tea
and
I've got a sheet of bronkaid in every purse
and a fuck ton of cinnamon gum
And hard boiled eggs
and turkey burger patties
And broth
. . .
Wish me luck.
I've fucking had it with being smushy.
While my boyfriend and I were broken up he fucked one of his friends. She's a model. Fucking hell. She's 11yrs younger than me. She's out of his life but still in his social circle. I refuse to see her in person and have her be thinner than me. Fuck her. She chased him while we were together and pounced the minute we broke up and she is a nasty little bitch. When he told her he was done with her and he and i were getting back together she started posting pictures of them together, knowing I would see them. She's a catty little cunt. I hate her.
I refuse to be fatter than her.
Refuse.
Fuck this noise.
Also I'm going to take up rollerskating. Because the leg workout and also obscure hobbies will make her seem even more basic in fucking comparison. I hope she chokes on a photographers dick.
[Meme/Humor] TFW
/u/Sighgal
Created: Sat Oct 8 22:03:25 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56kog0/tfw/
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You find a new safe food, so you binge on it until it's not safe anymore. #thisiswhywecanthavenicethings
[Rant/Rave] I was doing so well
/u/KajaIsForeverAlone [height:5'9 | CW: 147 BMI:21 | weight lost:15 lbs | Gender: F]
Created: Sat Oct 8 21:46:02 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56km9j/i_was_doing_so_well/
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I fucked up T_T
I ate so much
Fuck
What do I do
[Other] Every guy i fuck is afraid of my body.
/u/dollveinz
Created: Sat Oct 8 21:10:24 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56khm2/every_guy_i_fuck_is_afraid_of_my_body/
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How dismal!! for nearly 3 years my ONLY sources of self-esteem have been starving & boys, and now they're both just making me feel worse.I'm not even that thin, really. 42kg. but lately comments on how i look have switched from compliments to very unpleasant concern,, repulsion. repulsion. repulsion. the guy i was with last night kept running his hands over my bones and he said he's so scared for me, he begBEGGED me to gain weight. it's a strange feeling, to overdo something that supposably makes you 'pretty' so much that you become disgusting.
[Rant/Rave] Binging and Purging: The expense and waste
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Oct 8 21:06:15 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56kh3h/binging_and_purging_the_expense_and_waste/
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[deleted]
[Discussion] Arc Trainer Calories
/u/hh_lb
Created: Sat Oct 8 20:42:00 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56kdy4/arc_trainer_calories/
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Does anyone work out on an ARC trainer at their gym? And if so, do you know if the calories burned count is accurate? I can be on for an hour and burn 800 cals. There is no way I could run for an hour. I feel as though I'm being tricked.
[Discussion] Favourite instagrams?
/u/bizmo96
Created: Sat Oct 8 20:35:05 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56kd0a/favourite_instagrams/
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Instagram bans purposeful proed accounts, so what are your favourite accidental thinspo accounts?
[Rant/Rave] Trying to hold it together tonight (trigger warning sexual assault )
/u/miss_morticia [5'10" | cw: 146 | gw: 105 | 20.90 | F]
Created: Sat Oct 8 20:34:26 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56kcx2/trying_to_hold_it_together_tonight_trigger/
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On my phone, I'll flair when I have a computer tomorrow.
Today I saw a ghost from my past.
When I was 19 I dated a guy for a while. One day he called me and told me that he had been dating me as a joke, because his friends thought it would be funny if he dated a "fuck up". His words, not mine. He then apologized and said he wanted to be friends. Stupidly, I told him he did a shitty thing but agreed to be friends.
Except then on the day before my birthday he asked me to hang out as friends, he said he was upset and needed someone to talk to. So I met him to talk. As friends. We talked for a half hour and when I realized he wasn't really upset, just dicking around I tried to peace out.
He grabbed my arm and pulled me down and kissed me. I pushed him away, said "I don't want this" because I didn't. This dude had dated me as a JOKE, like I was funny. He was the last person I wanted to kiss. He said something to the effect of he knew I really did, and pulled me back. I said no again and tried to stand up once more. He pulled me down harder again, smashing his mouth on mine. I tried one last no and to push away and then I stopped struggling.
And I hate myself for not struggling more, because he didn't actually rape me. He made me give him a hand job while he fingered me. The fact that he didn't actually rape me will always make me wonder if I had punched him really hard if he would have left me alone. So I have a lot of anger at myself over that. But that's not the point.
He drove me back to my dorm and dropped me off. I had been wearing my favorite running shorts and a baggy t-shirt. I threw them away. I scrubbed myself for an hour in the shower and when I got out I had bruises up and down my arms and neck from where he grabbed me. My lips were swollen and bloody where he kissed me.
A month and a half later I tried and failed at killing myself. A major part of that was the fact that we went to the same university and everywhere I went there he was. His friends harassed me, he haunted me, and I couldn't get away. I couldn't even kill myself, So I ate. Until I was so fat no one would think of me sexually and I hated myself.
It took me an embarrassing amount of time to get over the whole thing. I think it was because he made me feel so pathetic and absolutely unlovable by getting me to like him as a joke for his friends, THEN had the nerve to force himself on me sexually.
Today I saw him at church. For an hour and half I sat and had to stare at the back of his head. I don't know if he saw me, I booked it out as soon as the sermon ended. I've felt dirty ever since.
I want to purge and binge and cut and burn because I feel like that girl all over again. Even though I have a wonderful husband who loves me I still remember how worthless and dirty I felt after him and I have so much hate for myself. I can't stay present I'm disassociating off and on. I'm a mess.
If you read all this God bless you, if you didn't then that's okay too. I just needed to get it out. Thank you for providing me with a safe spot to do that. <3
[Rant/Rave] Constant dilemma
/u/ThinFit96 [5'2 | CW:125lbs CGW:115lbs | 23.68 | -10lbs | F]
Created: Sat Oct 8 20:11:38 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56k9sd/constant_dilemma/
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So I train at a professional dance school where I dance for 5 hours+ a day which sounds great for weight loss, but I get soooo hungry and have to eat if I want to perform my best so I just maintain my weight in the end. Plus all my classmates eat soooo much food and they're all so skinny and I seem to be the only one that can gain weight??? Which just sucks, because my ED mind thinks I'm a totally worthless failure for not being able to eat less and not be skinnier but my rational mind knows that to be successful I need to eat to replenish my body. What's scary is when I start wishing I wasn't dancing so that I wouldn't need to eat as much so that I could lose more weight because dancing is what I absolutely love... ED's are scary.
[Meme/Humor] Tall Girl Problems: All sweatpants are capris. (And, eww, my legs are fat.)
/u/ladymiku [5'4" | 163lbs | 28 | -14lbs | F/18]
Created: Sat Oct 8 19:42:07 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56k5nh/tall_girl_problems_all_sweatpants_are_capris_and/
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https://i.redd.it/6aj7z4gqscqx.jpg
[Goal] I went on a run today for the first time in a long time
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Oct 8 19:23:48 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56k358/i_went_on_a_run_today_for_the_first_time_in_a/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/87b099ec4e6e46f9a0615e63e41c4b32?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=ea5b67a680ef7e808e378483de5234c5
[Meme/Humor] Dr Cox speaks the truth
/u/FaithHopeTrick [5'7 | CW 123 GW 119 |19.20 | -32lbs | F]
Created: Sat Oct 8 19:01:24 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56k01e/dr_cox_speaks_the_truth/
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https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=o_HAXan1wSQ
[Rant/Rave] I love being triggered enough to stop eating.
/u/witchy2628
Created: Sat Oct 8 18:55:39 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56jz9p/i_love_being_triggered_enough_to_stop_eating/
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I'm living with this guy I like and I thought he liked me too.... but this crazy tiny petite girl is crashing here for a few days and he completely ignores me now to talk to her. I was upset but now I'm just happy that I probably won't eat for a week!!
[Discussion] I hurt myself really badly fasting
/u/beautyandbeast5 [5'2 | 118lb | 22 | -47.5lb | F]
Created: Sat Oct 8 18:49:53 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56jyg2/i_hurt_myself_really_badly_fasting/
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So around day 2 of my fast I started to feel leg pains and like any well informed faster I uped my electrolytes. It didn't get better. By the end of day 4 the pain was really bad and I ended up having to call in a house visit doctor at midnight who told me I very likely had rhabdomyolysis (muscle breakdown that was leaking proteins into my urine because previous laxative use had weakened my kidneys) and gave me some strong pain meds.
I can usually go into ketosis within a day, but I didn't at all during this fast which is why I'm not surprised there was muscle breakdown. I'm eating little by little again, and I feel like the leg pain is getting better slowly... Very slowly. I don't understand why this happened. I don't understand why I didn't go into ketosis and why the muscles started to breakdown in the first place. Maybe I didn't notice that I'd injured myself and couldn't heal properly and that's what triggered it all? I don't know.
I'm scared to fast again.
tragic to be honest
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Oct 8 18:41:02 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56jx7h/tragic_to_be_honest/
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[deleted]
tragic to be honest
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Oct 8 18:41:02 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56jx7g/tragic_to_be_honest/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] [rant/rave] This event was supposed to be something to look forward to
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Oct 8 17:24:01 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56jm5f/rantrave_this_event_was_supposed_to_be_something/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] These people
/u/4wkw4rd_f33lz [5'3.5" | 107.2lbs | 19.13(new) | -24.8lbs | F]
Created: Sat Oct 8 17:06:36 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56jjgu/these_people/
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This isn't anything new but I just saw someone post "no one should be on a 1200 calorie diet." I just wanna shake them and be like wtf are you talking about!!! If your TDEE is only 1400 how are you supposed to lose weight eating more than 1200??? These poor poor children
[Rant/Rave] This is probably weird but I hate sitting on the toilet
/u/throwaway0908123 [5'7 | 120 | 18.73 | -17 | F]
Created: Sat Oct 8 16:50:15 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56jgzn/this_is_probably_weird_but_i_hate_sitting_on_the/
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I'm forced to stare at my fat fucking thighs spread out on the hard toilet seat, which of course leads to tons of body checking in the bathroom mirror to try to reassure myself that's not what my legs look like when I'm standing up. Ugh
[Rant/Rave] It's all gone wrong
/u/thin_is_in [5'8 | 115lbs | 17.3 | -35lbs | F]
Created: Sat Oct 8 16:40:14 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56jfes/its_all_gone_wrong/
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I'm crying and drinking and eating 6000cals a day. Everything hurts and I want to die.
The person who knew me more than anyone else has left me because I'm too much to deal with. I'm too damaged.
Just ignore all this.
[Other] Out of Sight - A documentary about invisible eating disorders
/u/thukui [5'3 | 114 | GW 88 | -16 | 20F]
Created: Sat Oct 8 16:17:21 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56jbsp/out_of_sight_a_documentary_about_invisible_eating/
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https://youtu.be/OWmhl1z9cPs
[Thinspo] lilmassari on instagram ❤️
/u/k-w- [5'5 | CW 95 | F]
Created: Sat Oct 8 15:07:48 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56j0ma/lilmassari_on_instagram/
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http://imgur.com/ApP9VaS
[Goal] That lovely feeling when your skinny jeans are just a little bit looser😊
/u/rukittenmerightnow
Created: Sat Oct 8 15:05:03 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56j04m/that_lovely_feeling_when_your_skinny_jeans_are/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/b01411a16c9a4357bb998ec8db6c9ab8?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=33e014b9300b0b755842cfcc9e375c97
[Rant/Rave] It all pays off
/u/Lady_Anarchy [169cm | CW: 53kg | GW: 50kg | BMI: 18.56 | F]
Created: Sat Oct 8 14:29:13 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56iubo/it_all_pays_off/
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One of the most motivational things that I've come to realise over this past year (during which I have gone from my greatest weight to the one which I am at now), is that on a subconscious level, people really do notice all this, even if they aren't in this sort of communities themselves.
In this past year, I've gone to being openly seen as the fattest, most unattractive and unappealing in any group of people, to actually having people who find me attractive. I've gone from being seen as the "try-hard weirdo", to being "mysterious and alluring". I've gone from people saying "you don't look terrible" to saying "you look good". I've gone from hating the sight of my own body in the mirror, to actually being quite okay with it.
And I mean, I am still very far from perfect (in the sense of, the way I want to look), but the truth is, to see that the progress I make is actually noticed by other people really motivates me to continue doing this, and not giving up on all the things I actually worked really hard for.
Oh and, on a side note, I believe I have finally achieved a thigh gap. As in, no matter how hard I push my legs together, there is still some sort of space left. And that makes me super happy. So, I just wanted to share that with you all.
EDIT: [my small successes](http://imgur.com/a/RD3jJ)
[Help] I need to lose weight so badly I want to cry
/u/abby___normal [5'5" | 120 | 20 | F]
Created: Sat Oct 8 14:16:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56isak/i_need_to_lose_weight_so_badly_i_want_to_cry/
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My line is 120lbs
I currently weight 120lbs.
I don't know what happened, I hate myself so fucking much. How the hell did I get so fucking fat.
I've been ok today--at 400ish + some alcohol. Shooting for under 1000 today. I've always been a high-cal resiricter, but lately I've just been eating and eating and doing a shitty job purging.
I don't know if anyone else gets this way, but sometimes hunger is a welcome feeling that I enjoy, and then other times I CAN'T handle it and I have to eat or I feel like the world is going to end. I fucking hate myself.
I feel like I'm just waiting for my body to stop being afraid of hunger again. Just fucking waiting.
I hate this eating disorder and at the same time am such a slave to it. I will never be happy with my stupid fucking weight.
[Rant/Rave] So glad I'm Jewish
/u/probablywithmydog [5'2 | 105lbs | 19.89 (new) | -6lbs | F]
Created: Sat Oct 8 14:11:43 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56irem/so_glad_im_jewish/
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This Wednesday is the Jewish holiday Yom Kippur. You're supposed to fast and pray all day long. I'm so excited to have an excuse to fast and my parents won't question it.
[Discussion] Which Monster Zero is the best one?
/u/hereyesarethesky [5'6" | 128.2 | 20.78 | -27]
Created: Sat Oct 8 13:54:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56iomb/which_monster_zero_is_the_best_one/
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I plan on getting my first Monster Zero today (shock, I usually get Bang) and I have seen that there are different flavors! Which one(s) are recommended as the best? :P
[Rant/Rave] On my way to a wedding with a three course plate service...
/u/justonenon-blonde [5'3" | CW: 126 | GW:105 | 23F]
Created: Sat Oct 8 13:52:31 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56io8s/on_my_way_to_a_wedding_with_a_three_course_plate/
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"Don't you think it's a shame to waste such expensive food?" Is always my favorite line when I don't lick the plates clean. Eating while surrounded by family, what could be better. yeyyyyy.
Ugh kill me
"No thanks, I already ate"
/u/FauxFurPantyDesigner [5'9" | CW: 149 GW: 135 | 21.61 | F]
Created: Sat Oct 8 13:49:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56inox/no_thanks_i_already_ate/
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What I said when I ran into a friend at my apartment complex when she asked me to get brunch... Of course I hadn't eaten yet and got around breakfast by telling my boyfriend that I wouldn't be hungry until later.
Then I convinced my friend to go shopping with me after I hung out with her while she had brunch. Now I have new hanky pankies that I bought with all the money I didn't spend on food this week.
[Rant/Rave] Trying to restrict. Already at 800 cal. [BED][rant/rave]
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Oct 8 13:34:50 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56ilaf/trying_to_restrict_already_at_800_cal_bedrantrave/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] When you're upset about your binge weight but remember it was your LW not too long ago
/u/apricaught [5'3.5"| CW 116.8 |LW 114.2| 20.85| -16| F]
Created: Sat Oct 8 12:41:35 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56ic1b/when_youre_upset_about_your_binge_weight_but/
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Trying to stay positive! I feel like a cop-out/don't deserve to feel ok but doing my best. Does anybody else benefit from that or do you just see it as backwards progress?
[Rant/Rave] Sigh...anyone else not have a social life?
/u/fayeeee
Created: Sat Oct 8 12:36:14 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56ib3h/sighanyone_else_not_have_a_social_life/
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I wonder if I'm alone in this. I'm 20 soon and it seems I have really been so involved with my ed in my teens I never got involved with enough people to be out on a Saturday night. I way prefer weekdays when I can just distract myself with college work.
[Help] I need help from fellow Swedish people here!
/u/EatMyInsides [156cm | CW:48.6kg | 0BMI: 21.00 | Weight Lost: 0.8]
Created: Sat Oct 8 12:17:27 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56i7xz/i_need_help_from_fellow_swedish_people_here/
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Does any of you use EC stacks? If you do, where do you get them? I'm really curious about it and want to try.
[Goal] Proud of myself
/u/abraddon
Created: Sat Oct 8 11:48:53 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56i2tt/proud_of_myself/
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I'm on mobile so I can flair (though I'm not really sure what this would be under anyways)
Anyways... Today I was taking a picture of myself and noticed that my cheeks looked very sunken. I then realized that my collarbones are very prominent and my chest bone is starting to show. So I don't know, I'm just really happy about that because I didn't realize I was even actually losing weight.
[Tip] Most savoury, 100 cal breakfast that kept me burping for awhile
/u/Laricia [5'4" | 108 | -2 | GW 95 | F]
Created: Sat Oct 8 10:57:01 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56hu0v/most_savoury_100_cal_breakfast_that_kept_me/
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I've always been afraid of spiralling out of control if I eat early in the day and try to concentrate the bulk of my daily intake (<600) from late afternoon onwards.
That's okay for weekdays when I'm occupied with work but weekends at home are a problem… I decided to toss a simple breakfast recently that turned out filling, super satisfying to taste and surprisingly fulfilling/suppressing; I made a lot less trips to the kitchen seeking out bits and pieces and even had room for Oreos in the evening!!
[Here it is: (I used a real heavy bigass bowl and felt like a master chef lol)](http://imgur.com/a/gsrQt)
* 3 hard-boiled egg whites (51 cals)
* 2 oz. Kimchi (15 cals)
* 1 Japanese cucumber, sliced (20 cals)
* 1/2 teaspoon dark soy sauce (3 cals)
* pepper/salt to taste, I was generous with the pepper which kept me glugging water throughout (2 cals)
The best part is you could easily double this amount for an ultra filling sumptuous meal and toggle the ingredients to your own taste, and it takes quite awhile to eat. This was honestly so good and definitely gonna be a staple for me and I'm excited about it, just wanted to share! :)
[Meme/Humor] WE'RE REALLY HUNGRY!!
/u/Weazin_the_Ju-uice
Created: Sat Oct 8 10:38:22 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56hqww/were_really_hungry/
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https://youtu.be/6hboH8wn3fU
[Other] Funny thing at work
/u/kafka__dreams
Created: Sat Oct 8 10:21:28 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56ho2k/funny_thing_at_work/
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I work at a restaurant and I mentioned how much of the hot sauce I had eaten that day (vegetables dipped in hot sauce <3) and my boss said, "I dont mind, you never eat. Some employees, fatter ones, eat a ton of food, but youre good cause you never eat." It made me happy that someone noticed :)
[Discussion] Daily Food Diary! October 08, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Sat Oct 8 10:02:10 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56hkqe/daily_food_diary_october_08_2016/
---
This is a daily food diary thread for October 08, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
[Rant/Rave] When you've been sticking to your diet and then your dad comes home with a giant box of cupcakes and cannolis 🙃🙃🙃🙃
/u/probablywithmydog [5'2 | 105lbs | 19.89 (new) | -6lbs | F]
Created: Sat Oct 8 09:46:29 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56hi85/when_youve_been_sticking_to_your_diet_and_then/
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I can already feel the binge approaching....
[Discussion] Comments :)
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Oct 8 08:57:33 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56haba/comments/
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[deleted]
[Meme/Humor] How much I said I ate vs. How much I actually ate
/u/lyxil [5' 0"| 93 lb | 19.13 | -47 | f]
Created: Sat Oct 8 08:50:51 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56h9bg/how_much_i_said_i_ate_vs_how_much_i_actually_ate/
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http://imgur.com/a/PLcbp
[Discussion] (Question) anyone else really excited for fall
/u/thinkthinlythrowaway
Created: Sat Oct 8 08:44:50 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56h8es/question_anyone_else_really_excited_for_fall/
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And big baggy sweaters so no one can see how plumpy or skinny you are
And being able to drink a shit ton of hot coffee and tea without people questioning it
and being able to complain about being cold and people understand instead of ask how you're cold in 80 degrees
I'm just so ready for fall aesthetic of being in leggings (on days I don't hate my legs) and big giant sweaters so when I do start to fast people don't question me
Although I'm also so not ready for fall cause of the holidays.
You have Halloween and thanksgiving and Christmas not to mention how it seems that everyone I fucking know was born in October November and December.
But still those baggy sweaters am I right?
Perfectionism, ambition, discipline and levelling up
/u/BlasphemousGrrrl
Created: Sat Oct 8 07:52:00 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56h10j/perfectionism_ambition_discipline_and_levelling_up/
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[removed]
[Discussion] Weighing less than I thought
/u/k-w- [5'5 | CW 95 | F]
Created: Sat Oct 8 07:17:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56gwmg/weighing_less_than_i_thought/
---
So, I drink a lot of water. Up until now, I'd only ever weighed myself in the afternoon, and it came out to about 104-106 pounds each day. It's nine am and I just weighed myself before drinking any water or having any food at all [tmi: I also just took a shit] and I'm 101.2lbs! I'm so happy! That's like 4 pounds of food and water lmao. What time of day do you guys weigh yourselves?
[Rant/Rave] There is a whole pizza at my house
/u/hh_lb
Created: Sat Oct 8 07:02:14 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56guqa/there_is_a_whole_pizza_at_my_house/
---
Okay I have been restricting so well all week.. like usually under 500. I lost like 6 lbs. And then my boyfriend brought over pizza last night. Not just any pizza. Stuffed fucking crust pizza. And I was like ok I'll have one piece. I got carried away and had two but I was still under 900 so I didn't beat myself up.
I have been so on my game.. like not even wanting food. But now I just woke up and it's in my fridge and he is gone and it is ALL I can think about. How do I keep from binging on it? I can't throw it away because it's his and I know he will want it when he's home. What the fuck do I do help me lol.
[Discussion] 'Stupid Questions' Saturday! October 08, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Sat Oct 8 06:02:32 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56gnow/stupid_questions_saturday_october_08_2016/
---
This is the weekly 'Stupid Questions' Saturday thread for October 08, 2016.
Use this thread as an opportunity to ask any questions you might have that you feel don't necessarily warrant their own post.
Please be wary of false advice and information. Be sure to research the facts before taking anyone's advice, no matter who they are. Remember that diagnosing members is unacceptable. **Anyone looking for medical guidance should seek the opinion of a medically licensed professional.**
*****
Have any questions or concerns? Comment below, or [PM the mods.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FproED)
[Thinspo] Those rocks look uncomfortable but wow, that's triggering
/u/taeyeons-comrade [perpetual shame]
Created: Sat Oct 8 05:46:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56gm5u/those_rocks_look_uncomfortable_but_wow_thats/
---
http://i.imgur.com/rUNGYWM.jpg
[Rant/Rave] I'M BACK TO MY FLAIR WEIGHT
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Oct 8 05:35:37 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56gl4n/im_back_to_my_flair_weight/
---
[deleted]
[Other] Started watching "This Is Us"
/u/YouMeAndSymmetry
Created: Sat Oct 8 04:19:06 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56geag/started_watching_this_is_us/
---
"But you guys don't know what it's like, looking like me and carrying around that extra seven pounds in your midsection."
I don't plan this show to continue with that gal. But that still felt felt great to heat.
[Tip] Veggies with a high protein to calorie ratio!
/u/fluorescentbunny [185cm | CW: 85.7kg | UGW: 66kg | BMI: 25 | -7.5kg | F | BED]
Created: Sat Oct 8 03:17:12 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56g8zy/veggies_with_a_high_protein_to_calorie_ratio/
---
https://www.healthaliciousness.com/articles/vegetables-high-in-protein.php
[Other] I dreamt I was banned
/u/Pitaia [1.70cm | CW: aaaHHAHA | BMI: ? |GW: S M A L L|GQ]
Created: Sat Oct 8 03:15:52 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56g8w7/i_dreamt_i_was_banned/
---
Just what the title says, I dreamt I got banned from proED and that totally freaked me out. More than ever I need this place, I need to see there are other that think how I think. I want to send positive energy to all of you, thanks for being here for me. We're gonna make it.
[Meme/Humor] Low Cal Brownies!
/u/CharChar12 [5' 9.5 |140lbs|21| Male]
Created: Sat Oct 8 00:52:03 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56fwi0/low_cal_brownies/
---
https://i.imgur.com/mHb13vv.gifv
[Discussion] is drinking before purging better?
/u/wyydean [5'3| CW125lb | GW100lb | F]
Created: Sat Oct 8 00:31:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56fuin/is_drinking_before_purging_better/
---
[removed]
[Discussion] I feel so restless and stuck
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Oct 8 00:01:10 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56frhl/i_feel_so_restless_and_stuck/
---
[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] Oh God why...
/u/SpitAndPennyStyle [5"2' |SW:~185 | CW: 157.5 *drinks bleach*| GW:105 | F]
Created: Fri Oct 7 23:08:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56fls1/oh_god_why/
---
I have 4 days off this weekend and I'm using my time off to fast discreetly for a few days. I saw an old friend today and they want to catch up over a lunch date tomorrow. Why is food at the center of every social interaction?
[Discussion] This whole thing is fucked up
/u/kafka__dreams
Created: Fri Oct 7 22:37:44 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56fi63/this_whole_thing_is_fucked_up/
---
I cant imagine not being this way. I eat ANYTHING and I hate myself, day ruined, Im such a failure, its gonna make me fat. Its so normal to me. I cant believe there are people who can just... eat. Like they get excited to go out to dinner. Someone offering them a cupcake doesn't make them panic, theyre happy about it. They eat and eat and their fine, meanwhile I eat a bite of something and its "i need to purge, whyd I swallow, this is gonna make my weight go up tomorrow." Its crazy this isnt normal to everyone. I cant imagine.
[Discussion] EC stack experiences
/u/erilaz- [5'7 | CW: 185 | GW: 110 | -45lbs | F]
Created: Fri Oct 7 22:32:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56fhlp/ec_stack_experiences/
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Hello all you lovely humans!
So I am in a bit of a pickle. I'm doing an EC stack until the 15th because I'll be visiting my university for a football game. I wanna look smaller than the last time I was there bc I'll be hanging out with both my ex and my crush(I have a penchant for drummers why do they all have to be friends ugh)
*the problem is I've only lost 5 pounds ugh*
So anyway I was wondering how much you guys have lost doing both an EC and restricting. Everything I see is from bodybuilders and not helpful since they eat like 2,000 cals and call that restricting ugh.
I'm planning to fast on three separate days, and keeping my cals at or below 500
So yeah tell me about your EC experiences! How much did you lose? Where you able to workout on it? I'd love to hear from this community!!
(Also can't flair bc mobile ugh life is hard)
Edit: I guess I can put my daily weigh ins here so people can see my own experience. Idk if it's going to be like this the whole time but I've lost around 2lbs ever day.
Day 1(pre EC): 191.6
Day 2: 190
Day 3: 187.8
I ❤️ Brenda
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Oct 7 21:47:07 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56fbuw/i_brenda/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/20ad204f10b14ee09c152af4e8e36ca2?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=ecfb4019c4443abb49b8562e775066fe
[Discussion] Today was better than yesterday
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Oct 7 21:42:00 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56fb7b/today_was_better_than_yesterday/
---
[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] dealing with loneliness
/u/eldariya [6'4" 137lb male with a taste for russian men and cheeseburgers]
Created: Fri Oct 7 21:16:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56f7w7/dealing_with_loneliness/
---
hey beautiful boys and girls.
I don't know if anyone else here feels the same way as I do but I am always to some extent lonely whether it be mentally or physically just drained / isolated whether it be intentional or not which is pretty shit and now is one of them moments and I guess it was "triggered" by the guy I'm currently speaking to and that whole situation is a mess but I really don't like weekends anymore as I just spend it in bed craving food and attention when really I am just in bed wanting to cry whilst eating rice crackers lol.
But to be honest during the week I am more mentally lonely as I recently started college and literally there's so many people i've just shut down and try and get away from it all and go the library and just listen to Mariah Carey or some thing, I don't even know where I am going with this but it's super late / early right now and I didn't know where else people would listen to me lol.
Kik group..?
/u/fishysandwich [5'3.5 | 115 | GW: 100 | -30 | F]
Created: Fri Oct 7 21:13:05 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56f7e8/kik_group/
---
[removed]
How do i even start?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Oct 7 20:36:22 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56f2dc/how_do_i_even_start/
---
[removed]
[Other] Responding with fury to someone's ED
/u/InSkyLimitEra [5' 7.25" | HW 180 | CW 111 | LW 111 | 29 F]
Created: Fri Oct 7 20:06:14 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56ey8v/responding_with_fury_to_someones_ed/
---
I don't know if anyone remembers me from my previous "my fiancé put me in food jail" thread a number of weeks ago, but I'm back.
So, my fiancé just finished yelling at me for like two hours while I sat and cried because he found out I'd been restricting to 900/day (over double what I used to eat) despite telling him I would try to stop restricting and eat normally (which I did do for a couple months).
Why anyone would react with anger instead of worry or compassion is absolutely baffling to me. More than ever, I desperately need to be loved. But he decided to be a complete asshole about it. He even threw his engagement ring at me and told me to choose between him and the disorder. He could have been an ally, someone with whom I share my ups and downs of this ED roller coaster. But he just feels like the enemy now. Someone I have to shut out and, if absolutely necessary, lie to if I'm starting to struggle.
I have a primary care appointment in two weeks. Last night, I tried as hard as I could to envision what it would be like to ask for real help. Like, tell her that I'm sick and I don't want to die and I want to know where to go or what to do to start the road to recover. I played the mental image in my mind over and over again and for once, some part of me actually thought that that might be okay.
Now I just want to restrict until I disappear.
[Discussion] Picked this up. Anybody have other book recommendations?
/u/savetheexplosion [5'2 | fat | Female]
Created: Fri Oct 7 19:59:06 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56ex8n/picked_this_up_anybody_have_other_book/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/b793d2589fb9440cb9211acd75a1d68e?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=1ea0969900c20138f99eac5d5505bce2
[Discussion] SOS best drinks to get at a bar?
/u/sorryqueen [5'2" | dreadful | F]
Created: Fri Oct 7 17:28:19 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56ebgu/sos_best_drinks_to_get_at_a_bar/
---
Hey everyone, so tomorrow is homecoming at my university and my friends and I are going to the bars to celebrate. Anyone have any good, low calorie drinks I can try? This is my first time actually "out" as a 21 year old and I'm terrified 😭
[Discussion] What's bronkaid and where is it found? Also what other drugs would you guys recommend?
/u/KajaIsForeverAlone [height:5'9 | CW: 147 BMI:21 | weight lost:15 lbs | Gender: F]
Created: Fri Oct 7 16:36:31 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56e39y/whats_bronkaid_and_where_is_it_found_also_what/
---
https://www.reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56e39y/whats_bronkaid_and_where_is_it_found_also_what/
[Rant/Rave] I'm weighing in tomorrow.
/u/EmpireStateBitch [5'4" | CW 120 | GW 115 | UGW 100 | F]
Created: Fri Oct 7 16:23:28 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56e174/im_weighing_in_tomorrow/
---
And instead of restricting carbs like I usually do, I ate a pint of ice cream. And half a bag of candy corn. Why.
[Rant/Rave] Well... There goes my self esteem.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Oct 7 16:18:27 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56e0c8/well_there_goes_my_self_esteem/
---
[deleted]
[Discussion] EC stacked before smoking, trying to quell the munchies, pray for me.
/u/citrus_cunt [5' 9"| 139lbs | 19.5| +2lbs | F]
Created: Fri Oct 7 16:14:07 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56dzly/ec_stacked_before_smoking_trying_to_quell_the/
---
What the title says lol
I hate weed bc I always binge from the munchies, plus I already maxxed out my calories today. And yet, here is am, higher than anything and praying the EC stacks work
How do you stop the munchies??
[Help] How to stop talking about food?
/u/RetailSlaveNo1 [5'2 | CW 164.8 | GW 95 | 31.22]
Created: Fri Oct 7 16:03:34 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56dxwp/how_to_stop_talking_about_food/
---
Every conversation I have I end up derailing into food, dieting, exercise.
It's so unhealthy and nobody wants to talk to me any more but I just think about it all the time so I talk about it a lot.
Do any of y'all have this problem? If so, how do you stop yourself?
[Help] Going home for Canadian thanksgiving
/u/violettevert [5'6" | fat | -10lbs | NB]
Created: Fri Oct 7 16:02:42 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56dxrh/going_home_for_canadian_thanksgiving/
---
Anyone in the same boat this weekend? What are your plans for getting through dinner/other family stuff? Last thanksgiving I was in recovery so this year might be tough. :/
[Meme/Humor] wear really thick leggings so when you look in the mirror you hate your legs more :^)
/u/AccaliaOmg [5'3 | 115 | 20.4 | -15 | F]
Created: Fri Oct 7 15:22:00 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56dqto/wear_really_thick_leggings_so_when_you_look_in/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/77b3421f24454f9781ba6c38abb84771?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=97055e3c07a7b9b91ce02c9fc9045051
[Help] Meeting an old friend... who used to be my ana buddy when we were in middle school
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Oct 7 15:18:19 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56dq64/meeting_an_old_friend_who_used_to_be_my_ana_buddy/
---
[removed]
[Rant/Rave] (Rant) I was doing so well and then fucked up with a snack
/u/thinkthinlythrowaway
Created: Fri Oct 7 15:03:15 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56dnk8/rant_i_was_doing_so_well_and_then_fucked_up_with/
---
I was doing well
My friend cancelled lunch so I was able to skip that
I didn't plan to eat anything till my boyfriend got off and dinner was already planned Brussel sprouts and so kind of low cal soup
But then there was chocolate
And I ate it
And now I feel like I've ruined my whole day
Any tips on not going bizerk in like 2 seconds and eating all the shit
I should just wait until dinner it's only 2 hours
But I'm also so sick
This sucks
Help
[Tip] Came up with an amazing alcoholic drink I wanted to share with you guys...
/u/moonshineknox [5'6" | 100 | 16.21| -15| F]
Created: Fri Oct 7 14:55:06 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56dm09/came_up_with_an_amazing_alcoholic_drink_i_wanted/
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Okay so last week my boyfriend and I were going to the beach and wanted something fun to drink! We ended up creating a reeeally good drink that I thought you guys would like too!
We basically just did a mix of:
-orange juice
-pineapple skyy vodka
And the secret ingredient, which I know is one of our favorites on this sub:
-zero-ultra monster energy
You guys....it's soooo good...it tastes like candy....please try it and tell me what you think!!!
Update on the interview.
/u/BlackGirlSteeze
Created: Fri Oct 7 14:29:29 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56dhfp/update_on_the_interview/
---
[removed]
[Help] Help: Fasted for forty hours, broke the fast, now eating gives me stomach pain and nausea
/u/daeboo [5ft1/80lbs]
Created: Fri Oct 7 14:28:24 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56dh8p/help_fasted_for_forty_hours_broke_the_fast_now/
---
As the title says.
I want to note that I've never fasted for this period of time before. Tried to ease into it with light food, etc. Its been about ten hours after I broke the fast but I still can't eat without stomach pain and wanting to puke. Just now I tried to eat one raspberry and instantly felt like vomiting.
Has anyone had a similar experience or can enlighten me as to what the hell is going on with my stomach?
[Help] Craving salty crunchy :P
/u/c_marier [5'6"| 113.4| 18.3 | -13 | 22F]
Created: Fri Oct 7 13:24:13 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56d5ef/craving_salty_crunchy_p/
---
Help! I don't even like or buy chips, but I have been struck lately with this huge craving for salty crunch. What is low cal that might satisfy???
[Other] Anyone use MFP or Fitbit and want to be friends?
/u/skinnylove73 [5'10 | 125 | 17.49 | -15 | F]
Created: Fri Oct 7 13:18:06 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56d472/anyone_use_mfp_or_fitbit_and_want_to_be_friends/
---
Let me know!
[Rant/Rave] Proud of myself today
/u/throwaway0908123 [5'7 | 120 | 18.73 | -17 | F]
Created: Fri Oct 7 12:53:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56czmj/proud_of_myself_today/
---
Before I started restricting, I had a huge problem with grazing/unconscious eating - I would go into my kitchen to get something, and just go into a kind of autopilot and start eating handfuls and handfuls of whatever was in the pantry. Today, though, I went in the kitchen to grab some papers and went into autopilot again, but instead of food, I found myself drinking a huge glass of water. It's a small victory, but I'm pretty proud of myself :)
[Rant/Rave] Jumping in the hand trend, and I didn't hate my legs today, so...here you go, I guess
/u/LittleSkittles [5'4.5" | 88.0 lbs | 14.87 | GW 70 lbs | 19F]
Created: Fri Oct 7 12:40:07 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56cx4b/jumping_in_the_hand_trend_and_i_didnt_hate_my/
---
http://imgur.com/fAWSguF
[Discussion] DAE just want to disappear?
/u/NindeNehima [5'2" | 88 | 16.67| F | GW: dead]
Created: Fri Oct 7 11:42:17 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56cmdx/dae_just_want_to_disappear/
---
I just was curious, from looking at pictures/thinspo on here, about what people's ultimate "goals" are? I see lots of people who want to look thin/beautiful/sexy and I say more power to you. But I just want to disappear, become smaller and smaller until I'm gone. I don't want anyone to notice me, I usually wear big clothes and don't want to look sexy often.
I'm not sure what the beginning of my ED was, but I think it might have to do with being violated by an ex and just wanting body gone. I used to dress up, want to look pretty. But that was almost 10 years ago now.
So yeah, I just got a little personal there, but I really am curious if anyone else thinks their ED has something to do with *not* wanting to be attractive.
I'm on mobile so I can't flair, but this is either a discussion or rant?
[Discussion] DAE browse this sub as a way of shaming themselves while eating/binging?
/u/goddamnroommate [5'6" | 143.8 | 23.30 | -50ish | F]
Created: Fri Oct 7 11:19:04 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56chyf/dae_browse_this_sub_as_a_way_of_shaming/
---
Sometimes when i binge, i read through about everyone's success as a way to hate myself more. I mean, i browse at other times, but never with as much self hatred. Am i alone in this?
[Help] Fighting compulsion
/u/chipmunknutter [5'10"| CW | 21.2 | maintenance | F]
Created: Fri Oct 7 10:42:37 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56cb1l/fighting_compulsion/
---
It's Friday! In my world that means...compulsively buy alldanuts and waste my Friday night chewing and spitting. I've managed to limit to once a week which is a definite improvement from three times a week. I don't even feel the urge and hate it while I'm doing it so felt like this week was the week that I would just bite the bullet and sit with the inevitable anxiety but I'm not sure I'm ready. I talked with a good friend with OCD and he encouraged me to just fight through today since I have to eventually. We pondered scenarios and I thought maybe if I buy the food anyway perhaps I can just throw it out if I literally feel no urge. I've been throwing out more and more of it each week. The other approach was to maybe buy less than usual. This sounds crAzy! Am I lying to myself feeling like it's getting better and I'll continue because each week is less and less or just making excuses for not stopping this behavior? So crazy to have compulsions without urges! Not sure what I'm looking for here I guess someone who understands. I'm spending my day back and forth "just go home, eat your dinner and play with the dogs" vs "it's getting better, do it today and you'll reinforce that you hate doing it which is helping you want to quit."
[Help] Wish me luck!
/u/xtabbithax
Created: Fri Oct 7 10:40:10 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56cal5/wish_me_luck/
---
My order of Maeng Da kratom arrived today! Wish me luck trying to make it taste decent! lol. Any recipes or tips?
[Rant/Rave] I ate this morning
/u/xcris19x [5'3 | FATFATFAT | Fat | F| UGW: 100/105]
Created: Fri Oct 7 10:26:29 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56c80p/i_ate_this_morning/
---
I started a diet that turned into a fast. I basically fasted from the 1st until yesterday. Every day I didn't eat a single bit, just drank juice or water or tea or anything liquid (no broth) - you get the idea. I was feeling pretty amazing. Just overall awesome, in total control, and then my wife came home from work and wanted biscuits and sausage. I coated my sausage in hot sauce/buffalo sauce to encourage a burn in some calories since I wasn't exactly looking forward to this. (If it matters at all our food is vegan, so veggie sausage and stuff.)
I ended up making three half sausage patties for me, three biscuits and I only buttered one side of each of them. I added a quarter of a quarter slice of cheese to each one. I made my wife 4 plus a (vegg)egg for her. I said I wasn't feeling hungry for that.
I ate one full biscuit and then a half of one and then just the remaining sausage on both of the other two. I said I was full but honestly, I just feel sick and disgusting. I want to purge so bad. Like, it's killing me- I know the food is just sitting there, waiting to come back up. I can't bring myself to just do it while my wife is here and home and might hear or something.
My plan is to drink as much water as I can, and take one of my diet pills to try and rush things along. I don't have any lax. So fingers crossed.
Anyways. I just wanted to get that out, to people who might understand me, because I have zero people to talk to about this.
And today was supposed to be a 200 cal/fast day again. I'm super bummed. Tomorrow looks to be another fasting day then I suppose.
[Rant/Rave] I love food.
/u/sossox
Created: Fri Oct 7 10:06:03 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56c42i/i_love_food/
---
I love food so fucking much. There are so many different things you can eat and every thing just tastes nice and brings so much comfort. Also I hate healthy food. It's awful. That's a problem for me. I'm trying to stay under 700 calories and I don't feel hungry...but everything sounds amazing. There is so much food available to me and I can't have any of it even though I really want it. Weight is motivator but I'm worried I'll break and end up purging again.
[Discussion] Daily Food Diary! October 07, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Fri Oct 7 10:02:42 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56c3e1/daily_food_diary_october_07_2016/
---
This is a daily food diary thread for October 07, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
Does anyone want to try a 10 day diet with me?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Oct 7 09:50:28 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56c14l/does_anyone_want_to_try_a_10_day_diet_with_me/
---
[removed]
[Other] first time trying monster zero ultra + the usual suspects
/u/tallgirlthrowaway13 [6'0" | 170lbs | 22.1 | -20lbs | F]
Created: Fri Oct 7 09:36:18 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56byi3/first_time_trying_monster_zero_ultra_the_usual/
---
http://imgur.com/a/mYuou
[Goal] Down 10 lbs!
/u/rizzle_riz [5'4' | CW:141 | 24.89 | -18 | F]
Created: Fri Oct 7 09:27:27 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56bwu4/down_10_lbs/
---
I haven't been at 149 since my freshman year of college and it feels great!! This is not my ultimate goal weight and i'm aiming for another 10lbs, so hopefully I can keep this up!
On the other hand I feel like my roommates are making a lot more comments about my eating habits because I've lost the weight in a matter of 2 weeks. I try to make sure I eat in front of them so they don't suspect anything but lately they've been saying things like "You don't have to eat healthy all the time" blah blah blah.
Anyways I'm quite proud of myself for being able to lose 10lbs!! :)
[Discussion] Let's talk teeth
/u/foodfornot [5'3" | 120lbs | BMI 21.3 | -20 | GW 105 | F]
Created: Fri Oct 7 08:13:05 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56bjrq/lets_talk_teeth/
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I wish my teeth were white and beautiful. I think it makes a huge difference for how pretty your face is and how young you look. However, my teeth are not white. My enamel is messed up from abusing white strips in high school, I have exposed dentin at my gum line (I think it was always like that) which gives me shooting agonizing pain when I try to whiten them at home, I'm probably calcium deficient, plus I'm constantly getting stains on my teeth from literally living off of coffee and tea. I get my teeth cleaned at the dentist twice per year but I wish I could go monthly! I know many of you, especially Mias, have similar problems. What do you do to get nicer whiter teeth? Supplements? Carry floss? Water after coffee? Share your tips!
[Rant/Rave] My bf noticed his hand fits around more of my thigh now
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Oct 7 07:58:01 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56bh5p/my_bf_noticed_his_hand_fits_around_more_of_my/
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We were driving and he put his hand on my thigh and mentioned that it felt smaller and he could wrap more hand around it. In that moment I felt so good, like I'm on my way to being dainty and delicate!!
[Rant/Rave] My weight loss diaries came!!!
/u/DenyMyHunger [5'7"| Fat! | UGW:112| F]
Created: Fri Oct 7 07:18:03 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56bawz/my_weight_loss_diaries_came/
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I created an album on imgur.
Am I doing this right?
http://m.imgur.com/a/lrJeD
[Discussion] Weekly Selfie, Progress Pic and OOTD Thread! October 07, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Fri Oct 7 06:03:12 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56b02t/weekly_selfie_progress_pic_and_ootd_thread/
---
This is the weekly picture thread for October 07, 2016.
Feel free to share your selfies, progress pics or outfit-of-the-day (OOTD) pics in this thread!
**Rules**
1. Be nice, **or you will be banned.**
2. Please use [imgur](http://imgur.com/) as a host.
Consider adding commentary on featured brands, sizing, inspiration behind your OOTD (trying to look thin or cover up weightloss, etc.)!
**Remember that anyone can view the contents of this thread even if they are banned from this subreddit. If you receive unwanted messages, please contact the mods with a screenshot of the relevant messages. Note that even if we ban people, they can still message you, and they still have access to the contents of this subreddit. The best thing for you to do is to block them.**
*****
Selfie, progress pic and OOTD threads are posted every Friday.
Have any questions or concerns? Comment below, or [PM the mods.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FproED)
[Goal] a personal mantra
/u/gin-and-lemon [🐝 5'1"| cw: 150lbs | bmi: 29 | -15lbs | f]
Created: Fri Oct 7 05:38:44 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56ax31/a_personal_mantra/
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https://i.redd.it/fpc212hfh1qx.png
[Rant/Rave] Jennifer Lawrence - disordered eating? Thoughts.
/u/smokesanddietcokes [Adipose Industries]
Created: Fri Oct 7 05:06:20 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56atcv/jennifer_lawrence_disordered_eating_thoughts/
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I was looking at random gifs, and one of Jennifer Lawrence talking about food popped up. It hit me that she talks about food a lot in public. She's known for it. I searched for more gifs to see her talking about, and eating, food.
[1](https://img.buzzfeed.com/buzzfeed-static/static/2015-02/17/10/enhanced/webdr10/anigif_enhanced-buzz-28343-1424187693-5_preview.gif)
[2](http://www.etonline.com/photo/2014/10/24108649/jennifer-lawrence-food.gif)
[3](http://ell.h-cdn.co/assets/16/10/1457369055-ea0fb630-f2a2-0132-44ce-0a2ca390b447.gif)
[4](http://www.hercampus.com/sites/default/files/2014/09/24/world-without-jennifer-lawrence-gifs-food-uproxx-2.gif)
[5](http://big.assets.huffingtonpost.com/jlawdiet.gif)
[6](http://31.media.tumblr.com/5b7f072b1afb2cfed6a728abdf2c811c/tumblr_mk9t6jmKCy1rwygc2o1_500.gif)
[7](http://thehollywoodsigh.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/05/world-without-jennifer-lawrence-gifs-food-announcementington.gif)
[8](http://s8.favim.com/orig/72/i-love-you-jennifer-lawrence-omg-ahahah-Favim.com-701359.jpg)
And there are.. so so, so many examples. *So many*.
Now, it could just be a quirky thing - or like, she mentioned food once and the public eye dubbed her 'food girl' and so encouraged her to keep it up, and she does for the 'public face' and popularity - but.. it really, really, REALLY reminds me **exactly** of how *I* talk about and act about food in public.
I always find a reason to think about food. I find myself ALWAYS talking about it. 'Light heartedly' mentioning it when I don't need to in conversation.
Passing off my 'talking about food' obsession as jokes or funny stories a LOT of the time, and/or just proof that I am totally okay with eating food. (I'm actually obsessed with food now, cus hungry)
Talking to other people in a way that makes out I think 'dieting'/eating too little is badddd.
Making out I eat a lot all the time and have zero food guilt along with all of that.
Telling people about huge meals I have had, even when they have ZERO reason to be interested. Jokingly boasting about how much I can eat, jokingly taking pride in it.. to pretend I think it's okay, I guess. And to just talk about food.
**Actually eating** ~~quite a bit~~ **TRUCKLOADS** in front of other people to keep up that facade, and because it's an excuse to binge when I am really hungry from restricting/fasting the rest of the time when I'm on my own. I'll fast for days in preparation of an event (like birthday party) so I can just eat fucking everything. And fast after it.
Hmm.
*People who heavily restrict - i.e, people with anorexia nervosa in some form, including atypical - are known to develop obsessions with food - recipes, talking about it, junk foods, etc. Apparently it's because they get so hungry in general, their brain hyper-focuses on it all the time.*
It just made me wonder... is anything going on behind the scenes there? Or do I just do a really good impression of someone who really is genuinely comfortable about food and eats totally normally with junk food included and enjoys it a lot?
(btw totally NOT hating on JL. She's actually one of my faves <3)
Growtopia Top 6 Scam Fail 2016
/u/proxsgamming
Created: Fri Oct 7 03:59:05 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56amfj/growtopia_top_6_scam_fail_2016/
---
https://www.youtube.com/attribution_link?a=la1N9FW4bbs&u=%2Fwatch%3Fv%3D31HS3zBaKms%26feature%3Dshare
[Rant/Rave] Hurricane updates: trying not to "save" the food in the fridges by eating it all.
/u/almightylurker [5'1" | 163.2 | 30.8 | -51.8 | F]
Created: Fri Oct 7 03:40:24 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56akq9/hurricane_updates_trying_not_to_save_the_food_in/
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Why do we have 2 to begin with. Italian families smh. Like I've been doing so well lately but since we have no AC my fat ass is sweating and it's making me more hungry than normal. It's not fair.
Edit: can't flair because I'm on mobile and computers are out of the question atm, sorry <3
[Help] I'm stuck in a cycle and I keep fucking up and I need help.
/u/aerienne [5'5" | 145.8 | F]
Created: Fri Oct 7 00:46:45 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56a43e/im_stuck_in_a_cycle_and_i_keep_fucking_up_and_i/
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I'm about 150 pounds. I was 129 in April. What the fucking fuck. I moved to a new country for a job and it was supposed to be a start over. Instead, I basically binged all of September. I promised myself I'd never see the 140s again, let alone the 150s.
I overeat, then get really anxious, and don't want to go out until I'm back to normal. But I get anxious again and have to go somewhere. I end up buying more food and repeating the cycle. Normally it would help if I just went a day without food. That's what I'd normally day and I'd feel so much better. But now I have to could dinner for a family 5 times per week and it's killing me. I'm expected to eat with them too and I don't want to. I need an excuse or something. Maybe I can say my GERD is really bad and I need to have my last meal early. I don't know.
To make it worse, my clothes don't fit. My previously very comfy jeans now have that 'fresh out of the dryer' tightness that doesn't go away. And my only winter coat is too tight to have anything underneath it. I already feel uncomfortable when I layer clothes because I'm not used to it and now it feels worse when everything is just a tad too tight.
But there is only one option. Lose the weight. I've done it before so I can clearly do it again.
All I need is one day. One perfect day to show me what I'm missing out on. I love how I feel when I'm empty and fasting. I feel like shit when I eat junk and I know it.
I hate how I'm feeling, I hate how I look, and I hate what I do. This is something I should have control over.
[Discussion] Look the same at different weights??
/u/SoFetchBetch [5'8 F CW:115 GW:105 LW:107 HW:138 WL:24]
Created: Fri Oct 7 00:14:22 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56a0r7/look_the_same_at_different_weights/
---
I was so sure I needed to be at a bmi of 16 for so long. I am always almost there, chasing that ideal. This weekend I had a really traumatic experience and subsequent breakup...there was physical abuse involved. So I've been kinda hiding away from the world and eating unhealthy foods since then and I've gone from 113 to 118 with my ideal being 109 and I was devastated to see the number. Just an instant boost to my self loathing. But when I looked in the mirror I looked... fine? Like the same. Not ideal but not all big and gross like I usually do at NEARLY 120 LBS!!!! So I'm trying to wrap my brain around this... why do I look the same when normally I look like lard on a stick at this weight?
[Rant/Rave] Today I went out to eat, it was a success and I'm so glad :)
/u/onlyroom_forthin [5'6 | CW:149.6 | 24.24 | SW:165 | UGW:120 | F]
Created: Fri Oct 7 00:03:43 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/569zju/today_i_went_out_to_eat_it_was_a_success_and_im/
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I posted earlier this week about being worried about events revolving around eating after totally crashing and burning last weekend. I've found that intermittent fasting (kind of) seems to be working really well for me.
Since Tuesday I've just been drinking coffee and eating <150 calories until 7pm, then eating a good sized dinner (500-800ish calories) with my boyfriend. I kept Tuesday under 600, under 1000 yesterday, and today was the big birthday dinner I was so worried about. I had fruit, oatmeal, and coffee for breakfast (was going to just have coffee but ended up at a study breakfast thing with friends, so I had to eat something unfortunately). Then I had a big dinner at the restaurant, a few glasses of wine after with my family, and still came in at a 750 calorie deficit.
It's a higher intake than I would like, but I'm SO glad I got to enjoy dinner, celebrate my cousin's birthday, and have drinks and a fun time with my family and not feel like I'm going to gain a hundred pounds. So shout out to everyone who gave me advice about making and sticking to a plan, and not eating during the day! It worked great for events this week and I'm going to try to stick to it!
[Discussion] Does anyone become super hungry when they're depressed?
/u/reggiesan [5'0" | 138 | 28.38 | -27 lbs | F | GW: 110]
Created: Thu Oct 6 23:58:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/569yw4/does_anyone_become_super_hungry_when_theyre/
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As soon as I get depressed I just get ravenous. No formal diagnosis here, but I am fairly sure I have some combo of EDNOS/BED. I just want to binge and binge and binge when I'm depressed, while I have a friend who when she is depressed immediately starts restricting. This is fucked up I know but I honestly wish I didn't get so hungry and had no appetite when I get depressed.
It is interesting to me how varied the reaction to depression is.
[Other] Chris Crocker is one of us
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Oct 6 23:41:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/569x4e/chris_crocker_is_one_of_us/
---
http://i.imgur.com/vLSMC83.jpg
[Help] Is it true that things come back up the in the same order they went down (TMI)?
/u/chocolatecoveredpugs [5'4| 118| 20.6 | -22lbs | F]
Created: Thu Oct 6 22:58:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/569s2h/is_it_true_that_things_come_back_up_the_in_the/
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So I've started purging again (after a full 2months b/p free) and I am starting to get a little concerned. I find that usually I'll have a low calorie but filling meal and then immediately gorge myself on snack foods.
So tonight I had a kale and squash soup with 1/2 a chicken breast and then binged on oreos, cereal, cheese, popcorn and bread in that order. When I purged though. The cereal and popcorn I could tell came out first, then the oreos and then soup and chicken. I never saw the bread but I purged literally within 3 minutes of eating the bread. Did it sink down in my stomach and is it being absorbed or did I just not notice it and it came out first?
[Help] Question about recovery, sorry. But I don't know where else to turn.
/u/Mi__ra [165cm |50 kg | 18.6 | 0 | F]
Created: Thu Oct 6 22:11:52 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/569m28/question_about_recovery_sorry_but_i_dont_know/
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Do any of you know any web resources for recovery? Articles that are scientifically sound etc.?
One website I tried to read to motivate myself for recovery spouts fatlogic and says that if you want to recover from an ED you can't exercise at all, ever. Because of this, I have a really hard time with accepting anything else they say.
I'd just like to read about why and how you could recover, without claims that you can gain weight when you are eating less than you burn...
[Goal] My costume came in! And the pants didn't fit.
/u/throwaway03199519 [glob]
Created: Thu Oct 6 21:49:01 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/569iv1/my_costume_came_in_and_the_pants_didnt_fit/
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http://i.imgur.com/FuMeETr.jpg
[Help] Dizziness and driving?
/u/dontcareifithurts__ [5'4.5 | 117 | - 4.2 | F]
Created: Thu Oct 6 21:45:51 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/569idm/dizziness_and_driving/
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Do any of you have an incredibly difficult time driving while eating a restricted calorie diet or fasting? That's one of my biggest roadblocks to weight loss (hah, pun not intended). Commuting so far to work not only eats up time I could spend on my feet burning calories, but I get sooooo dizzy and spaced out if I don't eat at least 500 calories. But then there are days where I eat 900 and I'm still dizzy!! Which is more than I'd like to consume...
How do you guys combat the dizziness? Should I be increasing my sodium intake? Potassium? I don't know anymore...
[Rant/Rave] Broke my fast but still happy
/u/Para-Medic [5'1' | too much | too much |0 | F]
Created: Thu Oct 6 20:44:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5699ie/broke_my_fast_but_still_happy/
---
I fasted from Sunday night at about 9pm to Wednesday at 9pm. Today, Thursday, I ate a real meal. I felt sick, but I kept it down. I even ate an ice cream and drank beer. I need to remember that I am in control. I control what I eat. If I decide it's okay to eat, I will eat. I will start fasting again Monday and I will last until Friday. It wasn't hard. The dreams bothered me more than anything else.
Sidenote,
I'm drunk. And it feels almost as good as fasting. Starvation is the cure for alcoholism.
[Other] Tried to reach out and got shut down
/u/hh_lb
Created: Thu Oct 6 20:41:30 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56990y/tried_to_reach_out_and_got_shut_down/
---
I started this post in a comment but felt like I would just make a post about it. Last night, the still sane part of me tried to open up to my parents about my ED during a discussion about my depression because most of the time it's like I don't want to have an eating disorder ya know? I wanna be thin but not sick.. I trust them and know they wouldn't force me into something I wasn't ready for and really just needed to speak with someone about it who I know loves me. I got a reaction I didn't expect. They completely minimized my illness and it hugely triggered me. Made me want to never eat again. My mom said "I've never noticed you really starving yourself" .. I mean I don't fucking live with them.. and when I was 13 (several several years ago) I lost 75 lbs in 2 months. Like what healthy 13 year old does that? I fasted for four days and she told me she never noticed me starving myself.
And it's not like I was looking for them to cry and dote on me.. but like I wanted them to be understanding not to tell me I wasn't sick.. they said some of that stuff is normal, don't be so hard on yourself, you're not sick.. and the most fucked up part is that made me want to be more sick. It made me want to "show them" how sick I was.. like become so thin that they regret making me feel like nothing was wrong.
The whole thing just made me feel bad about myself in so many ways.. made me feel like I only said something for attention, but it isn't like that bc even if they were completely concerned it's not like that would make me healthy. IDK IM CRAZY.
[Discussion] Anyone else worried about Thanksgiving?
/u/ForeverEmptyInside [5'9"| CW:115 lbs | BMI 17 | LW:104lbs | M]
Created: Thu Oct 6 20:40:33 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5698vw/anyone_else_worried_about_thanksgiving/
---
I'm wondering if anyone else is worried about thanksgiving or the holidays in general? I know this doesn't apply to my american readers, as we have thanksgiving early here... but are you guys worried for it next month? What about Christmas?
Not only will there be absurd amounts of food - but there will be SO MUCH SOCIAL EATING. I struggle with eating infront of other people a lot. This is not going to be fun.
Also, to add on top of all of this. I've been away at University ever since September and haven't seen a lot of my friends/family for over a month. When I left "recovery" I was at 135 ish and now i am below 120. I am afraid the people in my life will notice the difference as they are well aware of my eating habits ever since I got hospitalized...
[Rant/Rave] Welp, I went down TWO cup sizes and NONE in the band since I last measured
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Oct 6 20:01:20 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5692zj/welp_i_went_down_two_cup_sizes_and_none_in_the/
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[deleted]
[Goal] I felt OK about my arms today
/u/Sussuruskin [5'3 |CW 115 |20.9 | UGW 90 | 18F]
Created: Thu Oct 6 19:41:07 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/568zxk/i_felt_ok_about_my_arms_today/
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https://i.redd.it/lkvmv8qqiypx.jpg
[Tip] INSTANT COFFEE
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Oct 6 19:35:39 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/568z45/instant_coffee/
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[deleted]
[Discussion] The Compensation Game!
/u/bloodketosexmagic
Created: Thu Oct 6 18:24:36 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/568nx8/the_compensation_game/
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Restricted well Tuesday and Wednesday, today was a continuous binge and so now ill fast til Monday night :):):).
I was severely bulimic for nearly two years there, but haven't purged in nearly two months. I can feel myself transition over to a more restrictive/cardio purge outlook. Is this typical?
Edit words
[Help] To the people that purge...
/u/KajaIsForeverAlone [height:5'9 | CW: 147 BMI:21 | weight lost:15 lbs | Gender: F]
Created: Thu Oct 6 18:08:29 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/568l76/to_the_people_that_purge/
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What do you guys do to keep your teeth in decent condition? I'm absolutely terrible at remembering to brush and floss, and with as much as I binge and purge, my teeth are probably gonna fall out by the time I'm 20 and I really can't afford that. They're already yellow and gross.
Do you use any specific mouth wash and/or toothpaste?
[Other] I feel like I've gone off the deep end
/u/taeyeons-comrade [perpetual shame]
Created: Thu Oct 6 18:00:21 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/568jxb/i_feel_like_ive_gone_off_the_deep_end/
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I don't know how my phases change so fast. I haven't really been able to restrict for so many months and now all of a sudden I can. I've barely been eating at all and I feel crazy. I feel like I'm looking at myself form the outside in. I don't know how someone can go from constant emotional eating to zero emotions and no need for food. I guess I'll just go with it
[Rant/Rave] I think my sister is catching on
/u/archerofdawn [154cm | CW 157 | GW 88 | -7 | NB]
Created: Thu Oct 6 17:34:45 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/568ftx/i_think_my_sister_is_catching_on/
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...because she, uncharacteristically, brought home takeout for the two of us. And she's been telling me to eat this or that in the fridge for a meal or as a snack or whatever and giving me food and being weirdly more involved about my eating habits than usual.
This is so much more than I'd planned for dinner...
[Other] My new obsession
/u/heartbrokenandok [5'7"-ish | 198.4 | 31-ish | -23.4 | F]
Created: Thu Oct 6 17:19:04 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/568dc0/my_new_obsession/
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Green juice. I usually go for Suja Power Greens. Its 50cal for 12oz, and while I didn't like it at first now I feel like I can't live without it. I feel like I could live on coffee and green juice alone. To the point where I am willing to spend $4 on a 12oz bottle because I feel like I can't live without it. Green juice = love.
[Rant/Rave] I have no idea what my body actually looks like
/u/tortoise80
Created: Thu Oct 6 17:03:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/568ak2/i_have_no_idea_what_my_body_actually_looks_like/
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Recovering doesn't even seem worth it. I have no idea what I look like, some days I'll be devastated by how I look, other days not so much (will still hate myself though...)
I just wish I knew how I looked so I could FOR ONCE gain some perspective. Also when people tell me I look 'fine' or 'great' this seems to not only make me paranoid but also trigger me further?
Has anyone else had this?
[Discussion] DAE never fast?
/u/sweetmoo
Created: Thu Oct 6 16:44:28 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5687gz/dae_never_fast/
---
Hi folks. Just wondering - is anyone else unable to fast or at least incorporate a fast in to your life style?
Fasting greatly appeals to me. I have done so unintentionally due to great illness or a depressive state. It has been a calming, healing experience the few times I've fasted.
I find now however that fasting is not an option for me. I have a very physically intensive job and to be frank - I have to drink. So there are always calories in my day.
It doesn't bother me that I am unable to go without some caloric intake. Just wondering if any of you honies also live with an ED that excludes fasting. Hope you've all had a pleasant day :)
Bronkaid in Mexico?
/u/bravbo
Created: Thu Oct 6 16:11:47 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5682q1/bronkaid_in_mexico/
---
After a lot of research I decided to start ec staking but I forgot about a tiny detail, I live in Mexico. Do any fellow Mexicans know where I could get it? Or under which name? Thanks
[Rant/Rave] No matter how much weight I lose, I will always look obese in Primark's changing rooms
/u/eightstone [Height: 5ft 7 | CW: 9st 12lbs| BMI: 21 | Gender: F]
Created: Thu Oct 6 15:31:53 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/567vlf/no_matter_how_much_weight_i_lose_i_will_always/
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The day that trying on Primark clothing under primark lighting doesn't send me into a week-long spiral of cellulite-related self loathing will probably be the day I reach 4 stone and am about to die of organ failure.
[Other] Ready to fast this weekend
/u/ramargo [5'8" | 194 | 29.5 | -36 lbs | F]
Created: Thu Oct 6 15:14:55 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/567sek/ready_to_fast_this_weekend/
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http://imgur.com/a/14hk2?reg
[Help] Tips for my first fast?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Oct 6 15:04:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/567qi3/tips_for_my_first_fast/
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[deleted]
[Thinspo] Daily Thinspo 💕
/u/BlackGirlSteeze
Created: Thu Oct 6 15:02:21 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/567q15/daily_thinspo/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/a80f931fa7f740c184f060b5385daec4?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=223e6f30e1cf5f3c0857622ff6f9442e
😂
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Oct 6 14:51:38 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/567o16/_/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/3efeffada9844d3989767a8dfeafa572?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=a96eabfceeb116b1c3ebd7abcdf42e0d
[Goal] nsv and i am STOKED
/u/tallgirlthrowaway13 [6'0" | 170lbs | 22.1 | -20lbs | F]
Created: Thu Oct 6 14:16:29 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/567h2i/nsv_and_i_am_stoked/
---
today i'm wearing my size 6 jeans that are normally a bit tight, and they fit perfectly. no muffin top at all, even when i sit. i'm anxious about weighing since i've been having so many digestive issues the past couple weeks and i still feel bloated/gross, but i'm hoping tomorrow morning i'll get a number i like. also i'm planning on having some ground turkey for dinner (120 cals), and i'm only at 510 for the day and i'm doing a BBG workout when i'm off work. i feel pretty great about my calorie total today, especially since i didn't even take my ritalin today to curb my hunger.
yay progress! hope all you beautiful people are having a wonderful day :)
[Other] This contemporary dance just about it sums it up for me
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Oct 6 14:14:36 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/567goh/this_contemporary_dance_just_about_it_sums_it_up/
---
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uhI4CpAH8wM
[Discussion] DAE look at other subs that are food related and freak out over their "low calorie" meals?
/u/DenyMyHunger [5'7"| Fat! | UGW:112| F]
Created: Thu Oct 6 14:01:19 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/567e19/dae_look_at_other_subs_that_are_food_related_and/
---
Like yesterday I was on 1200 is plenty and someone had a "low calorie" dinner that was almost my full days worth of calories! I was like omg and knew I would feel guilty eating it. Or I'd eat that and nothing else the full day.
Maybe I'm just jealous...
first day
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Oct 6 13:54:53 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/567cr9/first_day/
---
[deleted]
[Meme/Humor] Lmao about this ad
/u/fuckyeahglitters [5'7 | 126 | 19.87 | -30 | F]
Created: Thu Oct 6 13:41:48 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/567a54/lmao_about_this_ad/
---
http://imgur.com/l7j5qEb
[Discussion] off-topic/on-topic: cramping hips
/u/ppyeoreul-mudgosipeo [5'6 | 2 Days w/o Binge | BMI 26.9 | F]
Created: Thu Oct 6 13:24:02 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5676p1/offtopicontopic_cramping_hips/
---
I doubt this is related to my disorder, but I like y'all better than the other weight loss/fitness/body subreddits, so here goes: Lately when I squat down to do something, I've been getting these wicked cramps in my hips, right where my leg joins my body. I'm not having any other muscle cramps, so I don't think it's a sodium/potassium issue. Do you guys know of any stretches or exercises I could do to make this stop happening? It's really...*cramping* my style ^(I'm sorry)
[Discussion] Exhaustion
/u/FattTea [Height 5'4"| CW 185.4 (SW 215.0) | Weight Lost -29.6| F|]
Created: Thu Oct 6 13:18:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5675qn/exhaustion/
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Does anyone else feel more and more run down as the week progresses? Because I feel like my energy is GONE.
My goal for this week is to get out of the 190s and recently I've been restricting to <750 calories a day and I feel like I'm having a harder and harder time :/
[Other] A very yellow lunch
/u/disbeetch [5'3'' | 140 | 23.7 | -34 | F]
Created: Thu Oct 6 12:58:01 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5671l9/a_very_yellow_lunch/
---
http://imgur.com/3QMOq6c
[Rant/Rave] "i think wanting to be thin hurt me so much worse than eating too much ever did"
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Oct 6 12:46:32 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/566zcb/i_think_wanting_to_be_thin_hurt_me_so_much_worse/
---
http://inkskinned.com/post/151431710376/i-think-wanting-to-be-thin-hurt-me-so-much-worse
[Goal] CONCURRING THIS SHIT
/u/KidCannibals
Created: Thu Oct 6 12:27:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/566vsw/concurring_this_shit/
---
Been suffering from an eating disorder for years, got my diagnosis a little while ago, just stopped myself from automatic vomiting. FIRST TIME IN FOREVER!!!!!! WE CAN DO THIS!!!!!
[Discussion] Stumbled across this album of old hollywood heights and weights
/u/bequietbelly [5'10" | CW 152 | HW ≥ 200 |LW 130 | GW 125 | F]
Created: Thu Oct 6 12:26:01 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/566veu/stumbled_across_this_album_of_old_hollywood/
---
http://imgur.com/a/sehHr#OgK9zbI
Where the heck are the miracle noodles?!
/u/erilaz- [5'7 | CW: 185 | GW: 110 | -45lbs | F]
Created: Thu Oct 6 12:18:02 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/566tw6/where_the_heck_are_the_miracle_noodles/
---
I went to Wegmans today and it said they had miracle noodles but I could not find them anywhere
I plan to go back soon and actually ask someone but I was too anxious to do it today. So what section should I be looking in for these? Thanks in advance lovelies ☺️😘
[Rant/Rave] I feel like a fraud.
/u/Pitaia [1.70cm | CW: aaaHHAHA | BMI: ? |GW: S M A L L|GQ]
Created: Thu Oct 6 12:16:34 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/566tlu/i_feel_like_a_fraud/
---
I've been eating way too much lately. I'm watching my weight go up or stay the same. I'm close to my GW but not close enough. Then I read everyone here restricting and eating healthy and I feel like a huge phony. I want to cry. It's just too much; EDs are damned if you do, damned if you don't.
I can't even write this out eloquently, I'm sorry.
[Discussion] I took too much Vyvanse and now I'm AAAAAAA
/u/citrus_cunt [5' 9"| 139lbs | 19.5| +2lbs | F]
Created: Thu Oct 6 12:06:18 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/566ri9/i_took_too_much_vyvanse_and_now_im_aaaaaaa/
---
How do y'all deal with it? I took 60mg and I'm like??? Really jittery and anxious. Idk how to calm it down a bit so I can focus again.... I'm drinking tea but the heat coupled with the fast heart rate just makes me feel like my electrolytes are imbalanced again and I h.a.t.e it!!!
[Help] Is taking 60mg of Adderall and drinking a monster zero ultra a bad idea?
/u/KajaIsForeverAlone [height:5'9 | CW: 147 BMI:21 | weight lost:15 lbs | Gender: F]
Created: Thu Oct 6 12:05:19 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/566rag/is_taking_60mg_of_adderall_and_drinking_a_monster/
---
It's double my usual dose and I've taken that much before. But not with a monster energy. Would it like, kill me?
[Rant/Rave] I can't remember what it feels like to eat normally
/u/toastyhigh [5'4 | 105.6| F]
Created: Thu Oct 6 10:46:48 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/566c8c/i_cant_remember_what_it_feels_like_to_eat_normally/
---
I was at the dining hall today, eating alone as usual while shoveling a plate of spinach down my throat. It randomly hit me that I am forgetting what it feels like to eat normally(non-ED person), that is not obsess over the calories and have my mind running with numbers and intake calculations. If I go out to eat, my mind says "binge and purge". Other times, I starve and fast.
But the weird thing is, I *like* the control. The intensity of control over every single aspect of eating and exercise. Of course, I don't like the constant self hatred and the sleepless nights I spend purging. But I can't say that if given the chance, I would go back to being normal. I feel like that non ED part of me is gone, never to come back. It's just not there anymore....ED related things have kind of engrained themselves in my personality.
[Other] Looking for MyFitnessPal buddies!
/u/OperatingOnScientist [5'3 | 128.6lbs | 23.41 | F | UGW 100lbs]
Created: Thu Oct 6 10:37:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/566ae1/looking_for_myfitnesspal_buddies/
---
[removed]
[Discussion] Daily Food Diary! October 06, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Thu Oct 6 10:02:24 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5663sw/daily_food_diary_october_06_2016/
---
This is a daily food diary thread for October 06, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
[Goal] SV: I actually had some success this week!
/u/rainbowsunshinedust [5'5 | 105 | 17.68 | GW 95 | F]
Created: Thu Oct 6 09:58:01 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5662xq/sv_i_actually_had_some_success_this_week/
---
Despite my worries about going over board with all the eating, birthdays, and special occasions that have been going on lately, I woke up to a beautiful 103.8 lbs on my scale. I even thought my waist looked little for a second. I feel really proud of myself and I havent seen a number that low in almost 2 years if i think about it. I mean most of what i ate yesterday was beer haha so even if im just dehydrated, I'm glad I'm actually posting something that isnt a rant haha :D Yall are lovely and I hope you guys have a wonderful day.
[Rant/Rave] [NSV] PANTS!!
/u/Melusedek [173 | CW: 57.5 | GW ?? | 19.21/18.99 | F]
Created: Thu Oct 6 09:48:14 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56617b/nsv_pants/
---
It's getting colder wear I live so I have to wear more and more clothes to keep warm into the evenings when biking back from ballet. I have a pair of pants from last year that were so small on me I had to reinforce the button. Today I can wear them over leggings AND my leotard and they're still too big.
[Help] At what BMI did you lose your period?
/u/starry_daydreamer [4'11" | 99 lbs | 21.2 | F]
Created: Thu Oct 6 08:54:30 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/565rdy/at_what_bmi_did_you_lose_your_period/
---
I honestly think that this is the one thing I'm looking forward to the most...periods fucking suck
[Rant/Rave] (Rant) lol I have no idea what my actual weight is anymore
/u/thinkthinlythrowaway
Created: Thu Oct 6 07:16:27 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/565bcu/rant_lol_i_have_no_idea_what_my_actual_weight_is/
---
So I can't get a scale because it would cause too much issues in my life right? And so my parents have a scale in their bathroom and when I'm at their house I use it... Unfortunately it's a shitty scale so I end up getting off and back on 8 times to get the same number at least 5 times in a row and decide that is my weight.
But here's the best part. I've spent the past few weeks at my parents house and I know logically I can't gain 3 pounds in a day but that's what the stupid scale says.
And also I'm on nexplanon birth control and sometimes I'm the lucky people who don't get periods for months but I've had a period on and off for the last 2 months and so my bloat has been very much.
I just feel gross and fat and I want to cruel up into a ball and kinda stay there forever.
And we all know the best holiday in the America thanksgiving is coming up and so my parents keep making a big deal cause it's my last one before I graduate college and move to Austin far the fuck away from them.
Everything just sucks.
Any ideas on good food that will help the period hungry but also low calorie and also will help with bloat because I'm dying here lol
[Discussion] EC stack schedule?
/u/hh_lb
Created: Thu Oct 6 07:12:12 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/565apc/ec_stack_schedule/
---
There may already be a post about this so I'm sorry if so BUT those of you who take EC stacks: what are your schedules? Daily? Multiple per day? Every other day? Just when you feel you need a boost?
I posted the other day about trying them for the first time and I've been taking them daily since. Just want some other input. Thx kiss kiss.
[Discussion] Anyone else do this?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Oct 6 06:37:41 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5655jx/anyone_else_do_this/
---
[deleted]
[Thinspo] losing weight makes me happy
/u/eightstone [Height: 5ft 7 | CW: 9st 12lbs| BMI: 21 | Gender: F]
Created: Thu Oct 6 06:15:41 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5652hp/losing_weight_makes_me_happy/
---
http://imgur.com/gallery/WkLo3
[Discussion] Weekly Emotional Support October 06, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Thu Oct 6 06:02:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5650nl/weekly_emotional_support_october_06_2016/
---
We're almost all dealing with quite stressful things outside of our eating disorders. Whether it be complicated relationships, friends, university, work or other mental illnesses like depression, anxiety or OCD, we all seem to be having a rougher time emotionally and mentally than the general population.
Use this thread to post about your problems or ask for advice concerning things other than EDs/ED behaviors.
**As always, follow the sub rules when reading or posting.**
*****
Weekly emotional well-being and support threads are posted every Thursday.
Have any questions or concerns? Comment below, or [PM the mods.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FproED)
[Other] Sending so much love to all the beautiful people in this sub
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Oct 6 05:35:30 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/564xge/sending_so_much_love_to_all_the_beautiful_people/
---
[deleted]
[Other] Wrote this during my breakdown.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Oct 6 05:22:38 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/564w1j/wrote_this_during_my_breakdown/
---
[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] 24/7 panic attack.
/u/stillweighting [5'4 | CW 130 | GW 99 | LW 107 | F]
Created: Thu Oct 6 04:43:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/564rva/247_panic_attack/
---
So I've slipped back into old habits but I'm not as strong as I once was.
I'm now spending all my time looking at thinspo, eating too much and hating every inch of myself.
I don't know what to do, I just need some help to be stronger.
Literally hate myself lol
[Tip] I just found this food delivery service that offers low-cal options for anyone who's too busy or doesn't like grocery shopping!
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Oct 6 02:55:05 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/564hrq/i_just_found_this_food_delivery_service_that/
---
[removed]
[Other] livin the life 👌
/u/electille [5'7 | 123 | 19.2 | ?]
Created: Thu Oct 6 02:36:29 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/564g77/livin_the_life/
---
http://imgur.com/Qe4jUj1
[Thinspo] 🎀🌸💕
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Oct 6 02:22:10 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/564ey0/_/
---
https://i.reddituploads.com/1a1d9100b0aa44f0b33b6648b7ba99ac?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=d7fbec29618be31ff6c8b4645e7b22b6
[Other] Late to the party with my giant manly hands.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Oct 6 01:31:53 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/564a8x/late_to_the_party_with_my_giant_manly_hands/
---
http://imgur.com/rdDAhX7
[Rant/Rave] I tried so hard.
/u/-lotophagi- [5'6" | 127lbs | 20 | -8lbs | F]
Created: Thu Oct 6 00:52:01 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/56468s/i_tried_so_hard/
---
I looked good. People started saying shit. I got depressed. I got annoyed. I got angry. I gave in to shut them up. I gained. I'm back at 120 at least.. probably more. I hate this. I hate feeling squishy. I hate my legs. I hate my stomach. I know i look better at 115. I loved 115. It felt so good, and I looked good, and my cellulite was mostly gone and my legs didn't touch and my pants didn't feel tight... i hate this. I can't get back under control now. Ever since mid July it's been shit. Just complete shit. I'm depressed and I don't want to leave the house. :(
Today
/u/BlackGirlSteeze
Created: Wed Oct 5 22:17:39 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/563oth/today/
---
[removed]
[Meme/Humor] Me. Hahaha... hahaha... haha... ha. :/
/u/screamingfalcon [5'7.5"/171.45cm | CW: 2fat4me | GW: 121 | UGW: 108 | F22]
Created: Wed Oct 5 21:29:02 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/563i7z/me_hahaha_hahaha_haha_ha/
---
http://m.imgur.com/AaYST2J
[Help] Help with dose?
/u/Skinnystems
Created: Wed Oct 5 21:19:18 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/563gwb/help_with_dose/
---
I'm extremely aware this has been discussed, but please help! I took my first bronkaid pill ever and I don't feel anything! I know a lot of people take it with caffeine, I didn't, but heard that you still get "that energetic feeling" without stacking and heck! I could fall asleep. :(
[Help] Got any ProED Vegan/Vegetarian Recipes?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Oct 5 20:22:33 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5638nj/got_any_proed_veganvegetarian_recipes/
---
[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] new job
/u/gin-and-lemon [🐝 5'1"| cw: 150lbs | bmi: 29 | -15lbs | f]
Created: Wed Oct 5 20:07:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5636ba/new_job/
---
i'm now working as a receptionist at a furniture store, and it's making restricting so much easier! i work long shifts, that take up most of the time that i allow myself to eat, and i refuse to eat at work. when offered my break, i grab a coffee. it makes me feel so in control, especially when everyone around me is eating fast food or talking about how they want fried foods. idk i have no one else i can tell about this, but its such a weirdly good feeling. like its a competition that nobody knows i'm winning.
[Meme/Humor] Identifying with both of these #justEDthings
/u/skin_ny [5'9.5" | 113.6 | 16.19 | -44 | F]
Created: Wed Oct 5 18:53:22 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/562v06/identifying_with_both_of_these_justedthings/
---
http://i.imgur.com/WWEoxEb.jpg
[Meme/Humor] Halloween Fun Size
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Oct 5 18:44:12 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/562tjr/halloween_fun_size/
---
[deleted]
[Goal] [Goal] only 5 more lbs until i have these legs again...
/u/augustfrst [5'6" | 112 | F]
Created: Wed Oct 5 18:43:04 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/562tdf/goal_only_5_more_lbs_until_i_have_these_legs_again/
---
http://imgur.com/a/gSgCg
[Goal] been gone for a minute
/u/Sighgal
Created: Wed Oct 5 18:29:29 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/562r8e/been_gone_for_a_minute/
---
But I have to share something. I've lost 30 lbs in 2 1/2 months.
Emotional distress is da best. It works even better than the EC stack for me.
[Discussion] when do you feel your best / worst
/u/texas_native [5'6" | 118 | 19.05 | F]
Created: Wed Oct 5 18:26:13 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/562qqr/when_do_you_feel_your_best_worst/
---
Whether it's body related or not. Was thinking about this on a run tonight, as they just redid the track I go to and there was a celebration. People laughing, having cake, all smiles, meanwhile I'm feeling like garbage because I'm PMSing and feel fat poking out from my sports bra. Most of my "best" feeling are when I'm with friends or my boyfriend while my "worst" are usually caused by minor (yet seemingly huge) body fluctuations. Puffy face, bloating, sports bra fat... Curious what gets you all up and down.
[Rant/Rave] Just ate "dinner" and now I feel like a big blob of gross
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Oct 5 18:03:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/562n5f/just_ate_dinner_and_now_i_feel_like_a_big_blob_of/
---
[deleted]
[Help] Anyone know the calories in a UC Berkeley wrap?
/u/aggressivedoughnut
Created: Wed Oct 5 17:43:18 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/562jwh/anyone_know_the_calories_in_a_uc_berkeley_wrap/
---
I know this is a super specific question...but I know there's gotta be someone who can help me out here.
I get whole wheat lavash with grilled chicken, shredded jack cheese, chipotle sauce, shredded lettuce, shredded carrots, and sliced cucumber. It's enough for 2 meals, filling, and doesn't seem too unhealthy.
Thanks so much!
[Rant/Rave] Just need a hug tonight
/u/caithaa [5'7|122|19|one day at a time 🌼]
Created: Wed Oct 5 17:43:16 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/562jwa/just_need_a_hug_tonight/
---
I've been losing for a while and I was on cloud nine. I wasn't feeling that hungry throughout the day, I was having happy thoughts, dropping dress/jean sizes like it was nothing. I always wrote about wanting to feel delicate, and even at a high weight, I felt delicate because I was losing I was progressing I was becoming thin.
Then, not sure what happened, I was ravenous all of a sudden. Like, eat everything in sight and keep going even though you're in pain kinda ravenous. Just today, I decided to "treat myself" to one of my favorite meals, baked flounder with truffle mac n cheese, around 600 calories for the whole thing. I thought it would somehow cure these binge-y thoughts. But no. I ate that, and was full, but ALL I could think about was more food. Literally, I was thinking about popcorn 2 minutes after finishing my food. I knew I was full, like my stomach FELT full, my brain KNEW it was full, and I still went to the fridge, got some carrots and hummus (thankfully just 140 in total) and ate.
This isn't even about the excess fucking calories anymore. My body hurts. My stomach hurts from expanding. I feel sluggish and nasty. I was thinking of a fast for a couple of days to somehow end it.
Now that I've written all of this out, I kinda feel like it's about motivation. I had a specific goal when college was back on in September and it was to join a specific sorority. Well, I failed. I ended up joining another sorority, and they're not the same. I like them and I'm happy they like me, but it's not the same. They don't motivate me to be perfect. They eat pizza and cookies constantly, and it's disgusting how they inhale them so quickly the calories almost immediately hits their body like a wave and transforms into rolls of fat on their thighs and stomach and arms and neck (this is my ED brain talking, I am so sorry) and I can see it, I can literally see them get bigger and bigger in front of me.
Now I feel like I'm one of them. How can I be skinny then? If I'm like these girls, I should be fat like them. I have no reason to be skinny, so what if I'm skinny now? What changes, will it even be worth it? I don't have a guy I like and my last relationship was fucked up and I don't know how I feel about love, and he said he wished I was thinner and I haven't had a relationship since. What if I get thin for myself, for my ideals and for what I think is beautiful, like Angelina in Girl Interrupted, what good does it do? My life is becoming fucking pointless and I feel like I'm an ugly, undesirable, fat failure. I feel like it's too late for me to be skinny. I feel like I threw away the years where I'm supposed to learn how to develop healthy emotions and relationships away, being the fat pig I am.
[Discussion] How much weight did you lose before people noticed?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Oct 5 17:42:11 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/562jpv/how_much_weight_did_you_lose_before_people_noticed/
---
[deleted]
[Intro] hi!! new here
/u/k-w- [5'5 | CW 95 | F]
Created: Wed Oct 5 16:41:35 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/562a0x/hi_new_here/
---
[removed]
[Discussion] Sick Motivation
/u/hh_lb
Created: Wed Oct 5 16:20:15 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5626ex/sick_motivation/
---
Anyone else ever been in this position:
Staying in a horrible unhealthy relationship that makes me hate myself because I'm afraid if I get out of it and feel better about myself I'll stop losing weight. The weirdest most self destructive thing.
[Other] Can this be released faster???
/u/c_marier [5'6"| 113.4| 18.3 | -13 | 22F]
Created: Wed Oct 5 16:17:21 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5625xx/can_this_be_released_faster/
---
http://health.howstuffworks.com/wellness/diet-fitness/information/new-phone-app-computes-calories-by-taking-a-picture-of-your-meal.htm
[Rant/Rave] Why do people always comment on food???
/u/notyourtoy [5'8" | 126 lbs | 18.95 BMI | -36 lbs | F]
Created: Wed Oct 5 15:41:41 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/561zn0/why_do_people_always_comment_on_food/
---
I start work at 4:30am and meet with my personal trainer to lift when I'm done at 11am, so I have to eat at some point in there. Usually I'll have my protein overnight oats (about 300 calories depending on the day and what I put in) at 7.
This guy leaves the gym around 7 every day and EVERY DAY he's makes a comment about the fact that I'm eating. Today it was "you're always eating!"
No. you think I'd look like this if I was always eating? I'm not always eating, I'm always hungry. Always ravenous. Always daydreaming about all the foods I won't let myself eat. You think I look at yelp reviews of comfort food restaurants because I'm ever going to go there? Naw man, I look at those pictures INSTEAD of eating the food.
Shut up. Let me enjoy my damn oats. They're the closest thing to dessert I ever eat.
/rant
[Rant/Rave] (Rant) Today isn't going well and I'm worried about how much it's going to set me back
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Oct 5 15:30:26 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/561xnd/rant_today_isnt_going_well_and_im_worried_about/
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[deleted]
[Other] Just a song you guys might enjoy. It's been in my head for like 3 days. Lyrics in comments.
/u/leviosaahh [5'8 | CW 148 D: | GW 111 | -26 | F]
Created: Wed Oct 5 15:21:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/561w32/just_a_song_you_guys_might_enjoy_its_been_in_my/
---
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DCqGZfj586w
[Help] I got prescribed anti-depressants, but I still want to restrict. Any one else have experience with this?
/u/cheeekyslug [5'6" | BF: 26% | - 55lbs | 19/F]
Created: Wed Oct 5 15:17:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/561v81/i_got_prescribed_antidepressants_but_i_still_want/
---
My mental health has been very rocky. I'm at the point where I cry every night and start panicking when I'm alone. I also feel like my mind wanders and I don't know what to do with myself and then I go back into a very depressive state.
I went to my doctor today and I asked about seeing a psych. She actually just prescribed me medication on the spot, which was Citalopram. I've taken Prozac and Zoloft in the past, but never this one.
I'm a bit scared because everyone here says that anti-depressants also increases your appetite. I like where my appetite is right now, and I rather suppress if anything.
Does anyone else care to share what it's like? Also do you guys recommend EC stacking with this medication? I hear one of the huge complaints with my medication is tiredness, which is not very appealing to me since I need to be constant working or busy due to school.
[Tip] Favorite low calorie/no calorie foods and recipes?
/u/timetofuckingshrink [5'11 |CW 136 |BMI 18.97 |GW 111 |F]
Created: Wed Oct 5 14:54:49 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/561r0m/favorite_low_calorieno_calorie_foods_and_recipes/
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What are your best low calorie or no calorie foods/recipes that are filling or good to snack on? My favorites are:
* Celery with a little bit of fat free sour cream mixed with a ranch dressing flavor packet or with onion powder, garlic salt, pepper, parsley, and cayenne (~35 cal/2 tablespoons).
* Sugar free jello (10 cal)
* Cucumbers tossed with soy sauce, vinegar, pepper, and scallions (~20 cal/half cup)
* Ramen broth- no noodles but add cilantro, scallions, soy sauce, and siracha (~40 cal per cup)
* Egg whites scrambled in a non stick pan with spinach, onions, spices (~40 cal/2 egg scramble, ~65 cal if I add a slice of non fat American cheese)
* Pickles (0 cal)
[Other] Bronkaid
/u/Skinnystems
Created: Wed Oct 5 14:37:20 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/561nsr/bronkaid/
---
So, I don't post much here, only every now and then, I am more of a lurker. Recently haven't been doing too well with self control.. also a week ago I went to the hospital because I was having some breathing issues. Today, I decided to go out and get myself some Bronkaid, hoping it'll help worth both my issues.
Anyone have any advice or admitting?
[Discussion] My brain decides - out of no where - that I can't eat "that". Anyone else?
/u/mckenziemudkip [5'2 | CW:109(-21) GW:88 | BMI 20.45| F/20]
Created: Wed Oct 5 14:28:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/561m3u/my_brain_decides_out_of_no_where_that_i_cant_eat/
---
Apparently coffee creamer is scary now? Wtf...
Do you guys have any foods/drinks you're fine with one day, and afraid to have the next?
[Discussion] Body & fasting
/u/setniessesed [5'11.5" | CW: 141 GW: 130 | 18.71 | -18lbs | 20/F]
Created: Wed Oct 5 13:27:10 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/561afw/body_fasting/
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Whenever I fast or successfully restrict for a while I like my body so much better than when I eat. Even just this fast session for like 2 days (after bingeing for 2 days straight) makes me feel so much better when I look in the mirror. And it's not even really looking at my stomach, which of course would expand when I eat; the area that really makes me hate myself is my sides.
Do you guys experience this too? Is it possible that in only 2 days my body/sides would shrink? Or is it just self-esteem/body image? I'm curious to hear personal experience/theories/information on the subject.
[Meme/Humor] Having bullion cubes be like...
/u/Im_A_Whale_AMA [5'3.5" | a lot | ¯\_(ツ)_/¯]
Created: Wed Oct 5 13:17:39 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5618nc/having_bullion_cubes_be_like/
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https://i.imgflip.com/1btpqk.jpg
[Goal] Reached my first goal weight, so I finally got my belly button pierced! ☺️
/u/adonut_girl
Created: Wed Oct 5 12:53:23 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5613vy/reached_my_first_goal_weight_so_i_finally_got_my/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/d8036286437f4665a10441b454909cc0?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=656c0d28fc1658ad8d378180f9e45c08
[Rant/Rave] "If you're really eating like that"
/u/KillingKylie [5'5| Meh|-38|F|GW: 97]
Created: Wed Oct 5 12:20:33 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/560xqv/if_youre_really_eating_like_that/
---
I have been heavily restricting and dropped a pant size in 2 weeks. (I am now getting in the lower BMI side.) I have also been exercising like nuts and everyone has been commenting on my weight...
So imagine when speaking to my therapist today how I felt when he said "if you are really eating like you say you are"... Oh wait. Excuse me? Are you trying to say I am a fat wannabe piece of shit? Great!
I am going to fast for 3 days per usual while I realize the fact that I am too fat to have an ED to the point that no one believes I restrict. For fucks sake nothing in my closet is bigger than a medium top (baggy ass hoodies I love) or size 4 pants. Now I realize I probably am a lard ass squeezing into these clothes like a delusional whale. Please kill me...
[Thinspo] fasting today!
/u/eightstone [Height: 5ft 7 | CW: 9st 12lbs| BMI: 21 | Gender: F]
Created: Wed Oct 5 12:18:49 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/560xfo/fasting_today/
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http://imgur.com/gallery/HWxsj
[Meme/Humor] GUYS I FOUND THIS AT THE THRIFT STORE AND IT'S PERFECT
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Oct 5 11:10:19 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/560k7x/guys_i_found_this_at_the_thrift_store_and_its/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/8b9df01cdd9741eab0ad30c6d0367480?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=85909cf53b4537c5e137de295f2b69ed
[Discussion] Does anyone feel like they looked thinner at a higher weight?
/u/WhatShouldIWearToday [5'5" | 104.2 | 18.35 | (Post Pregnancy) | F]
Created: Wed Oct 5 11:03:51 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/560j08/does_anyone_feel_like_they_looked_thinner_at_a/
---
I guess I'm technically underweight now at 109. (Was actually 108.8 on the scale this morning!)
I feel like I look bigger than I did at 120+. Am I just losing definition? I feel like my abs used to look so much more defined. My hip bones, too. Now I'm wishing I had been more diligent about progress photos, because who knows!
[Goal] Not anywhere close to perfect like all of you, but this is the best body selfie I've taken in a while.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Oct 5 10:57:00 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/560hnm/not_anywhere_close_to_perfect_like_all_of_you_but/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/9d6e9c0a191c4cf4a036e890ff65445c?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=479598ab86bce3143cafed225923cd0d
[Help] Overdid it on the stimulants and Norco yesterday. Ended up w a panic attack lasting until 5am. But I didn't break my fast! :D
/u/depressionbunny [5'6" | 138 | 22.6 | -12 | FM]
Created: Wed Oct 5 10:42:37 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/560f0p/overdid_it_on_the_stimulants_and_norco_yesterday/
---
I had a lot to do, and coffee plus adderall curbs my hunger during a fast. Made the mistake of taking a Norco, which pigeon tailed me into a full blown panic attack. I'd rather not repeat that.
How do you all get shit done while fasting? I'm afraid to take my adderall and coffee again, even though I know it was the Norco (which always gives me an adverse reaction, idk why I thought yesterday would be different).
[Thinspo] Before/Afters inspire me so much, and this is my fave.
/u/caithaa [5'7|122|19|one day at a time 🌼]
Created: Wed Oct 5 10:35:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/560dqc/beforeafters_inspire_me_so_much_and_this_is_my/
---
http://i.imgur.com/V7sEzZ1.jpg
[Discussion] My roommate looks at my food like a creepy dude looks at breasts
/u/Thunder2WonderThighs
Created: Wed Oct 5 10:30:30 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/560coh/my_roommate_looks_at_my_food_like_a_creepy_dude/
---
It's driving me crazy, maybe I'm already crazy and a normal person wouldn't notice or care. But we'll be talking and I'll bring over some food and her eyes will dart over intensely to my food and it makes me feel really uncomfortable and vulnerable. Like if you're gonna look, sneak a peek when I'm not looking right at you.
Does anybody else feel that way or am I just a giant weirdo?
[Discussion] People from my highschool
/u/throwaway03199519 [glob]
Created: Wed Oct 5 10:20:22 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/560ans/people_from_my_highschool/
---
The pretty people from my highschool are all gaining mad weight. I just wanna be the one with a consistent skinny body. I was a twig in middle school and high school because I was an athlete. After college hit me, I gained 15-20 pounds in 3 years, as a result of SSRI meds, binge tendencies, and lack of physical activity. I'm glad I realized it when I did and have already lost the weight. I now weigh what I was when I first came to college.
I know how I have (internally) reacted when I see people I went to highschool with and they gained over 20 pounds. I just *NEVER* want someone to see me that way. I want them to think I got more attractive, rather than fatter.
[Discussion] Daily Food Diary! October 05, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Wed Oct 5 10:02:32 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5607bt/daily_food_diary_october_05_2016/
---
This is a daily food diary thread for October 05, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
[Discussion] What do you do to get through a fast?
/u/KajaIsForeverAlone [height:5'9 | CW: 147 BMI:21 | weight lost:15 lbs | Gender: F]
Created: Wed Oct 5 09:55:15 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5605vt/what_do_you_do_to_get_through_a_fast/
---
Hobbies? Anything?
[Meme/Humor] These are sitting in my break room at work. It feels like they're reminding me of my fast every time I walk back there.
/u/Missy_Is_Bitter [5'3"| 179.2.0 | -36.8lbs | F]
Created: Wed Oct 5 09:52:33 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5605c0/these_are_sitting_in_my_break_room_at_work_it/
---
https://i.reddituploads.com/2ae701feaa0f4ea59f0e45fc22e59b07?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=b420ac4bf6affebe2e48ffe99e8b3f98
[Help] EC stack + diabetes question
/u/archerofdawn [154cm | CW 157 | GW 88 | -7 | NB]
Created: Wed Oct 5 09:49:00 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5604oh/ec_stack_diabetes_question/
---
so I'm a type 2 diabetic who, like an idiot, didn't think to check for any potential warnings for ephedrine before ordering stack stuff. Google says that I shouldn't take it because it raises blood sugar, but also most of the responses I've seen are from type 1 diabetics (who have to be far more vigilant about their blood sugar than type 2s imo).
Does anyone know if it's dangerous for type 2 diabetics to take ephedrine? honestly I might just take it and see how things go because it doesn't sound like it's going to kill me on the spot.
[Discussion] DAE get really sick after long or even shortish periods of restriction?
/u/hh_lb
Created: Wed Oct 5 09:13:56 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55zy6m/dae_get_really_sick_after_long_or_even_shortish/
---
Like if I restrict to 200 calories for even one day like I did yesterday, trying to eat is absolutely nauseating and afterwards I basically have to live on the toilet. (TMI sry :-) )
So I am stuck in a spiraling hole of tunnel vision, chest pain, and low blood pressure now.. even trying to eat a bite of cottage cheese I'm like struggling.
[Discussion] Regular snacks instead of having meals?
/u/rawtruism
Created: Wed Oct 5 08:56:37 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55zv11/regular_snacks_instead_of_having_meals/
---
Hi! I just had a thought about snacks come into my mind. I like to cook and eat actual meals, but it's really time consuming and I often feel too tired to cook, so I often just don't do it, and end up eating stuff I don't have to cook.
So, I was thinking about conducting an experiment, where I have a lunchbox with different, low calorie stuff like veggies, fruit, nuts and other healthy snack-things, all stuff that I have already weighed and calculated, so I'll have as many calories as I am going to eat that day, divided into small snack-sized bags.
Then I can, when I feel actual hunger, take out one of the bags and eat what's in it. The hunger will go away for a while, and when I get hungry again, I can open another one. Which means, I'll get to eat when I feel hunger deeply, but not a lot. I mean, we're talking 50-100 calories give/take.
I was thinking about doing this to save on cooking-time, and so that I'll have something to eat almost always if I feel like it (or you know, if my body feels like it) and because I find it hard sometimes to figure out when I'll be hungry, so meal-planning is a bit difficult from time to time.
Have any of you tried anything similar? Do you end up eating more or less? Did it even work for you? And/or what do you think about this idea? I'm curious to hear your thoughts!
[Help] What to do when you're in an eating mood?
/u/yummmies [5'4" | 120 | -45 | F]
Created: Wed Oct 5 08:51:31 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55zu3x/what_to_do_when_youre_in_an_eating_mood/
---
[removed]
[Meme/Humor] >:)
/u/AccaliaOmg [5'3 | 115 | 20.4 | -15 | F]
Created: Wed Oct 5 08:39:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55zs7l/_/
---
https://i.reddituploads.com/1320f718ca3640e4b6f7a7dc4dc80447?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=98b1417c1410f0c57757b0c3dc306c11
[Discussion] DAE judge what's in other people's shopping carts?
/u/ppyeoreul-mudgosipeo [5'6 | 2 Days w/o Binge | BMI 26.9 | F]
Created: Wed Oct 5 08:24:55 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55zplp/dae_judge_whats_in_other_peoples_shopping_carts/
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I try not to be judgmental, and I guess it's not really *my* judgmental voice, it's my *disorder's* judgmental voice that does this, but...it feels like a guilty pleasure to walk around the grocery store and peek in other people's baskets. I like to compare what they're buying with how they look.
[Goal] 111.2 this morning :)
/u/mckenziemudkip [5'2 | CW:109(-21) GW:88 | BMI 20.45| F/20]
Created: Wed Oct 5 08:07:49 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55zmna/1112_this_morning/
---
So, for the last month I haven't been here very much. I haven't been bingeing often, but really pushing for normal eating. Sooooo, that got me to a disgusting weight. Now I'm back!
I've been restricting on and off between 600 and 800 calories. And that got me down from 117lbs back to almost 110! (And no BM since Monday, so hopefully less) I'm really happy with my progress, and have decided to allow 800cal a day. Losertown stats are my phone background, to constantly remind me I could be 90 lbs by February 4th! (My birthday! ♡)
I hope all of you are doing well, and hello again since I was gone for quite a bit!
Tell me about your days, and current goals c:
Also, anyone had spaghetti squash?
[Rant/Rave] I just binged over 2000 calories and I have never been so ashamed of myself
/u/OperatingOnScientist [5'3 | 128.6lbs | 23.41 | F | UGW 100lbs]
Created: Wed Oct 5 06:44:43 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55z9tl/i_just_binged_over_2000_calories_and_i_have_never/
---
I was so close to a big milestone. I was ONE pound away from losing a stone, and I'm going to cry myself to sleep tonight because I know I'll have put on weight by tomorrow.
[Discussion] I never called it an ED
/u/isolatedfugue
Created: Wed Oct 5 06:35:20 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55z8gg/i_never_called_it_an_ed/
---
I know what this sub is for, so the name of it doesn't really matter, but when I was at my worst, (lightest, most entrenched in the disorder,) I always thought of it as a "control disorder." I don't feel like the eating -- well, I have a hard time using that word, "eating." I hate saying it, I hate seeing people doing it, it's a terrible word to me. And my lightness (when I was at my thinnest) was more about my control over what I put in my body than about the act of "eating."
So, I'm working on managing my control disorder.
Also, I found myself healthiest when I didn't have a weigh scale to know how light I was getting. It wasn't about reaching a number. Now I feel like the scale adds a level of feedback, like a punishment if I don't do well. I don't know how to explain it. I feel like if I messed up, I was ok before. Now even when I don't mess up, I see a number that tells me I have, and it makes me feel disappointed.
Anyways, I am grateful for all the kind people here who support each other and help each other feel less alone. Suffering alone is dangerous and depressing.
[Goal] Yesterday was really great.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Oct 5 06:28:55 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55z7in/yesterday_was_really_great/
---
[deleted]
[Goal] Very happy morning
/u/lowkeydeadinside
Created: Wed Oct 5 06:19:35 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55z66o/very_happy_morning/
---
I weighed myself this morning and I'm 10 pounds from the last time I cried about my weight. I'm at 119.2. It's not enough, but I'm so fucking proud that I'm below 120 again. I don't know if I'll get down to 100 like I did before but I know I have to be below 110. I'm so proud of myself.
[Goal] Three weeks after binging for over a month, I'm JUST starting to get my pre-binge body back... with bonus muscle!
/u/smokesanddietcokes [Adipose Industries]
Created: Wed Oct 5 06:03:36 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55z3yd/three_weeks_after_binging_for_over_a_month_im/
---
A long time, but it's happening sooner than I thought :) Not quite there yet, I still have a few 'too pinch-able' layers of fat to shed before I'm back where I was, but the shape is coming back into place rather than looking totally flabby. Only first thing in the morning, mind :P
I'm still staying away from the scale though, I'm trying to judge by looks and feel. I'm still going to stay away from the scale until maybe around January 22nd next year.
I'm quite nervous because I have a maintenance week starting 24th of October, because I have a race/running event on the 31st that I am hoping to do well in.. so I have decided to be fed for it to perform my best. I know my maintenance week might turn into a surplus week, because I know myself well enough and there's gonna be a higher than usual amount of carbs which always set me off. I'm happy to take that risk though, because this event is important to me. Still though.. I'm only just really getting back on track so I hope it doesn't totally blow things.
My hands are strangely swollen up the last couple of days, I don't know why.
Anyway! I just wanted to share my happy on seeing my body get nearer to where it was :) I kinda thought I'd always be that flabby post-binge fest version of me.
Love you guys!
[Discussion] Way To Go Wednesday October 05, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Wed Oct 5 06:03:05 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55z3w0/way_to_go_wednesday_october_05_2016/
---
This is the weekly achievement thread for October 05, 2016.
This weekly thread is to spotlight those achievements you feel don't necessarily warrant their own post, but you'd like to celebrate all the same. This is not limited to specifically ED-related goals; share anything you are happy about having done or accomplished recently!
*****
Achievement threads are posted every Wednesday.
Have any questions or concerns? Comment below, or [PM the mods.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FproED)
[Goal] Close to my goal weight again.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Oct 5 05:50:35 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55z2an/close_to_my_goal_weight_again/
---
[deleted]
[Other] My Life
/u/Chromalust [6'1 | CW: 133lbs | GW: Less | mtF]
Created: Wed Oct 5 05:40:12 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55z13z/my_life/
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http://i.imgur.com/hcu44II.jpg
[Help] I'm so hungry
/u/FauxFurPantyDesigner [5'9" | CW: 149 GW: 135 | 21.61 | F]
Created: Wed Oct 5 05:06:23 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55yx99/im_so_hungry/
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But I can't bring myself to eat. I'm so conflicted because I love what's happening to my weight and figure, but I know it isn't good for me. I've lost ten pounds recently because I'm afraid of eating.
I'm really struggling and I don't know what to do. I've reached out to a lot of resources but I'm scared that I need to go to an inpatient program. I'm hungry, but I can't eat because there's no reason to. I wish I could just sleep all day and night.
Ugh. Sorry for rambling, I need advice and a hug.
[Other] Food dreams when fasting
/u/Para-Medic [5'1' | too much | too much |0 | F]
Created: Wed Oct 5 04:49:23 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55yvhv/food_dreams_when_fasting/
---
I'm on my 3rd full day of fasting. I had a very vivid dream about eating a large bag of hot Cheetos and it woke me up. I actually felt bloated and full. It was so bizarre, I just had to share.
[Rant/Rave] My family triggers me..
/u/sickcatlover
Created: Tue Oct 4 23:15:12 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55xz0v/my_family_triggers_me/
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They know I have a problem. I've told them I want to get help and they refuse because they'll "just give me anti-depressants" and then I'll be "hooked on them for life". I went to the market, bought ice cream peanut butter etc. and purged today. My mom called me out on it and my dad's response was that "I'm too scrawny you don't need to lose weight". I am 5'2 125 pounds and actually gained weight since I became bulimic (I lost weight thru calorie restricting 1200 calories originally). My parents try to push food on me like idiots. I bet they're happy that I'm bulimic now because I've gained weight.
[Intro] Can I get it back?
/u/thisisyourthrowaway
Created: Tue Oct 4 22:34:13 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55xu3c/can_i_get_it_back/
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[removed]
[Thinspo] I just really liked my legs in this picture.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Oct 4 21:16:42 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55xj4e/i_just_really_liked_my_legs_in_this_picture/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/9332cae961ae475a97cd9ddc3949ed00?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=cc2f21c5cff5d921499fdbb3abb5c119
[Rant/Rave] My boyfriend is suspicious
/u/lilmissdisappearing [5'3" | 111 | 19.66 | *not enough* | F]
Created: Tue Oct 4 21:08:26 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55xhur/my_boyfriend_is_suspicious/
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####This got really long, I'm sorry. **Tl;dr** My wonderful loving boyfriend is worried about me so I'm doing the rational thing and doubling down on deception by basically forcing a mini-binge on myself. Guilt and self pity and gross food descriptions ahead.
He doesn't know I'm like this, of course. I conveniently left out this part of my mental health history since I was "recovered" when we got together and I was (am) deeply embarrassed and ashamed of my ED (though I'm pretty sure at this point that I subconsciously just wanted to avoid raising any flags in advance so I could get away with all my weird food stuff later).
Usually I restrict around 700 and make sure to eat when he's around to keep him from worrying about it, but the last few days I've been eating as little as possible in anticipation of a friend from school visiting. I am insane and *need* her to notice I'm thinner (I'm home for the semester, we haven't seen each other since before I started relapsing) so I can be happy and eat "normally" instead of straight up binging during this visit. No breakfast, lots of ingredient anxiety, zero cal drinks in cans/bottles with labels visible. Sloppy.
Last night after we got home, after midnight, I mini-binged on a second(!) helping of hamburger pie (made by my roommates so I have no idea what all they put in it) and chips and wine and a brownie. Cue insta-regret panic attack. I'm trying not to start purging again because I'm already rapidly sliding back down this slope and I think I'll just lose control if I do. This means all my calories are permanent for now, unless I can find a way to exercise them off (no chance if bf is around).
And then I got "the talk." Miniature, premature. He didn't say anything about EDs, but he's *worried.* My *eating habits* are *unhealthy.* I had too much wine on an empty stomach to successfully make something up when he asked what else I'd eaten that day. He listed some things he'd noticed, not even scratching the surface. He gave me *that* look. The "you're starving yourself" look. The "I'm just concerned about you" look. I am well acquainted with this look, and the you-are-hurting-yourself-and-everyone-you-love baggage that comes with it.
So today I am proving him wrong. It's his day off. I convinced him I wanted to go out to breakfast. I had half a plate of eggs Benedict *and* two giant pieces of French toast (calories: question mark. A million? Too many? How much ham was that? Did they cook the French toast in butter *and* put it on top?) We were supposed to go on a hike afterwards but he decided he didn't want to. Back to the house to put away leftovers. Could already see the lump of food in the mirror.
As we're out and about, I eat two baby pickles and a cup of SF jello (10, food I had at home). Stuck in traffic. My stomach is starting to puff over my waistband. At the end of the day, he asked if we could go to a special fast food place (there's only one in our state) and I said yes, of course, because I needed it not to bother me. I got "normal" food. Not a salad, no grilled chicken. When I realized it came with a drink I got coke zero, but that's the worst I did! Before I pulled out of our parking spot he asked if we could eat some in the car before we head home. I plastered on a smile and obliged - put away 2 chicken strips, a piece of Texas toast, and a handful of fries, all dipped in the place's special magical secret sauce that looked suspiciously mayo-based. I pretended not to notice that he was "sneakily" watching(!) me(!) eat(!) and tried to suppress the images I normally use to stop myself from binging on this kind of food: piles of chunky yellow fat, slaughtered birds, flour, oil, salt; numbers - the combo is 792 with 40g fat and each cup of dipping sauce is 173 with 13g, that's more than a full day's worth of food! He stopped eating and I immediately put down the piece of chicken I had torn off and put the takeout box away.
We went to a friend's and re-fried (because who doesn't have a deep fryer on their kitchen counter?) then finished our meals with him, and I am currently trying to choke down a 100-cal pack of almonds as we smoke and watch anime. I realize I have been very conspicuously quietly typing this for a while, but i guess that is what it is. 💁 We go home to a recently stocked apartment at 9:30.
I just hit 108.8 today. If I don't get sick before I get to sleep and escape from food for the night, I'm betting I will when I step on the scale tomorrow. Plus, I drunkenly texted a friend from the ED support group I ran at my school and basically told her I was relapsing and "something happened over the summer" and I am tired of hiding shit from my boyfriend. She is my extremely publicly recovered built af lifting buddy advocate friend so of course gave me regular human brain sweet reasonable recovery ish help like "what can I do for you? What if you told your bf so you wouldn't have to hide?" So I guess I have to wrap that situation up somehow.
I *cannot* have people notice yet. **I need to be closer to my UGW before anyone starts interrupting.** I just found a wonderful new therapist and I think we are really doing well with my fun mystery mood disorder and I want to get better enough to graduate a skinny bitch in the spring. **It will interrupt that** if everyone turns to my ED because they are afraid I will drop dead (regardless of any harm reduction I talk about). Ugh, what am I going to do?! 😩
[Discussion] wide rib cage?
/u/caroxxkings [5'6" | 123.6 | bmi 20 | not enough | GW: 110]
Created: Tue Oct 4 20:35:45 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55xclj/wide_rib_cage/
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does anyone else feel that no matter how much you loose, your rib cage still looks boxy?? maybe its my body dysmorphia..
[Help] Non perishable low Cal options that are relatively low sodium?
/u/TopCat1392 [5'3.5" | FAT | ??? | -16.2 | GW:92.6 | F]
Created: Tue Oct 4 19:43:30 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55x3y3/non_perishable_low_cal_options_that_are/
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Possible storm incoming where I'm located. Trying to find low cal, low sodium, and hopefully low carb options... any thoughts??? Or am I asking too much?
[Thinspo] Thinspo sketches ✏️ (no reference sorry for proportions that look a little off)
/u/rukittenmerightnow
Created: Tue Oct 4 19:37:49 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55x2zk/thinspo_sketches_no_reference_sorry_for/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/9fac992c05ff427584000eb2b27cca9b?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=914f5630d59416e6e8752ec030536150
[Help] Monster Zero Ultra
/u/somberfawn
Created: Tue Oct 4 19:36:04 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55x2o7/monster_zero_ultra/
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I see a lot of people drink or recommend Monster Zero Ultra, and I was curious if anyone has had any problems with them? My older brother experienced a heart attack (survived) due to drinking so many energy drinks, so it's made me wary. Plus I already have chest/heart problems and didn't want to aggravate them worse.
Have you experienced problems with Monster Zero Ultra? If so, what do you like to drink during fasts?
By asking this, I'm not trying to condone or promote eating disorders. I'm trying to keep myself healthy and heart attack-free by asking for health concerns and how to be safe. Thanks
[Help] All of the beautiful weight-loss goal journals
/u/convincemeimhere [5'2" | CW 103 | 19.52% | GW 90]
Created: Tue Oct 4 19:33:32 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55x29u/all_of_the_beautiful_weightloss_goal_journals/
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Hey all, I need some help.
A few weeks ago (maybe longer) a bunch of you posted awesome pics of your journals with your weight-loss goals drawn out along with rewards. I did several searches to try to find some of these posts but nothing turned up :(
Do any of you possibly have the links to any of these past posts? I need some inspiration!
[Rant/Rave] I had to laugh at myself today
/u/clamshells [5'7 | 115 | 18.0 | f]
Created: Tue Oct 4 19:01:00 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55wx1g/i_had_to_laugh_at_myself_today/
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i never eat meals anymore -- i'm in college and i live right next to the dining hall, so i take my food to go and c/s in my room. if i'm disciplined i can take in very few calories, as low as 100 a day, and still feel completely full/satisfied. (most of my calories come from booze.)
so when today (in my midterms stress) i ended up eating 600 calories, i was incredibly annoyed with myself, felt completely disgusting.
and then part of me stepped out of ED brain and realized just how hilariously and devastatingly ridiculous it is to feel so deeply that 600 calories for an entire day is *too much*, and that 100-300 a day is the norm.
my brain and my self-standards are totally fucked, and a really twisted part of me likes it that way.
¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
[Help] Do we purge all of our calories from our binges?
/u/sickcatlover
Created: Tue Oct 4 17:57:27 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55wmth/do_we_purge_all_of_our_calories_from_our_binges/
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I've been on a diet for the last two years and lost a lot of weight counting calories.Recently started B/Ping but started binging last year. My birthday is this weekend and I want to binge on cookies, cake, ice cream, pizza, etc. but I won't do it if I absorb any of the calories from it. I don't want to gain weight.
Edit: Ooh also chocolate I love chocolate.
[Rant/Rave] First EC stack
/u/hh_lb
Created: Tue Oct 4 17:36:59 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55wjh4/first_ec_stack/
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This is only my second post here, I'm usually just a lurker but I wanted to share that I just tried an EC stack for the first time at about 5 PM (probably dumb doing it that late but I was too excited to wait until tomorrow) and holy fuck I feel like I could run the world. Have only eaten 200 cals today and I feel like I could go another week without eating right now.
Skeptical as this feels too good to be true but I'm enjoying the energy and lack of hunger while it lasts :-)
PS I'm on mobile and can't flair sorry n bless u all.
[Intro] New to this sub
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Oct 4 16:50:24 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55wbrl/new_to_this_sub/
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Hey! For as long as I can remember I've had issues with eating. Growing up I would skip breakfast and lunch and then binge 3000 calories for dinner. So I gained weight and have had severe body image issues since. My weight often fluctuates because of binging (but not purging) and fasting.
I am 5'9 and my lowest weight has been 135. My highest was 180 lbs.
I am currently 147 after having lost 20 pounds since September 1st on a soft diet that doesn't exceed 1200 calories.
Anyways, I look forward to interacting with you all!
[Rant/Rave] I've gained weight :(
/u/minamasood [5'6.5"| hopeless| 22F]
Created: Tue Oct 4 16:49:36 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55wbm7/ive_gained_weight/
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I'm terrified to see how much but my stats are in no way accurate. I had to take a break and eat more for a bit (though I was still purging regularly) for the sake of appearances and because my heart rate and blood pressure were too low.
My dad just said today that he's not concerned about me anymore and I look much healthier.
I know that's his way of saying I've gained. Fuck me. I can't believe I let this happen again. I get so wrapped up in everyone's concerns or compliments that I begin to believe them and stop restricting. When will I realize that their idea of thin is not even good enough and I can't believe them?
Anyway, it sucks but it was definitely the motivation I needed snap out of my monthlong binge. And now people think I'm better so I can begin restricting properly (plus it's fall so I can wear baggy clothes to hide weight loss).
[Thinspo] Midday Thinspo 💕
/u/BlackGirlSteeze
Created: Tue Oct 4 16:14:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55w5r5/midday_thinspo/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/ebce3d3d2e5e4c48a85392efc085d91d?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=6071b32ca66f2fa7100a94706c8435ae
[Rant/Rave] I wrote a gloomy limerick at work today.
/u/bequietbelly [5'10" | CW 152 | HW ≥ 200 |LW 130 | GW 125 | F]
Created: Tue Oct 4 16:08:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55w4mx/i_wrote_a_gloomy_limerick_at_work_today/
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A woman who felt like a whale
Was locked in a fight with her scale.
Her wish to be thin--
Her most cherished sin--
Made all her recoveries fail.
[Help] Eating after a fast
/u/hopedarawrasaurus [5'2"| 150 | 28 | -29 | F]
Created: Tue Oct 4 15:53:53 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55w1yq/eating_after_a_fast/
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I haven't fasted before (normally just restrict, but totally binged yesterday and felt the need to fast) and I am wondering if I should try and eat something before I workout tomorrow morning? By the time I go to workout I will have been fasting for 36 hours (just water and coffee) and I really don't want to be sick or pass out when I work out. Normally, however, I don't like eating before noon but I'm just not sure if I should do that tomorrow because I have been fasting. Thoughts on what I should do?
[Tip] My newest obsessions
/u/c_marier [5'6"| 113.4| 18.3 | -13 | 22F]
Created: Tue Oct 4 15:48:24 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55w0zw/my_newest_obsessions/
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a) bullion broth. 5 calories in a cup. I've started drinking it an hour or so after dinner to keep from getting the midnight munchies. It fills me up and tastes so satisfying, like a whole meal. I know it's full of sodium, but as long as I don't plan on weighing myself the next day, whatever.
b) cashew milk. Someone on here mentioned it and OMG 25 calories per cup??? So creamy and yummy in coffee. 10/10 recommend. I'm going to try frothing it later on tonight to see if I can make a latte.
c) cabbage. 1/4 head of cabbage shredded/chopped, 1 tbs vinegar, 2 tbs lemon juice, 1 tsp salt, 1/2 tsp pepper. Shake up in a Tupperware and then you get to eat a HUGE HEAPING bowl of COLESLAW-LIKE YUMMINESS for 70 calories without all the gross sugar and mayo and who the hell knows what else in real coleslaw.
[Other] You know you're fasting when...
/u/wearebulletproof [5'4 | fat | 20F🎀✨]
Created: Tue Oct 4 15:29:24 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55vxlt/you_know_youre_fasting_when/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/bf44da59229e4ff2ae6039b1e052a2de?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=6fc2e348e9096cda0ff8d86120e2d6b9
[Thinspo] Marshmallow eating contest? Not sure but this worked as reverse thinspo for me
/u/mermaid_puppy [5'11" | 137lb | UGW 115 | F]
Created: Tue Oct 4 15:16:41 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55vv9o/marshmallow_eating_contest_not_sure_but_this/
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https://youtu.be/nW6C50YqEm0
[Help] Calories in tea
/u/woollyshirt [5'7.7 | 116.4lbs | 17.69 | -77.6lbs | M/NB]
Created: Tue Oct 4 15:06:37 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55vtgc/calories_in_tea/
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I was in a [T2 shop](https://www.t2tea.com/en/uk/Home) recently and really liked the look of some of their teas, but a few of them have added sugar/nougat/etc and no calorie content listed, so I didn't buy any and emailed the company to ask if they had any nutrition information available.
They just responded to me today, saying "The only teas with calories currently is our Turkish Sugar range and Choc Matcha." and "most of our teas simply don’t require Nutritional Information Panel (NIP), due to not meeting the calorie content thresholds of 1.0g, in fact most of our teas register below 0.1g, so this information isn’t printed on most tea packaging, and is thus not available to our teams or customers."
I don't really believe this personally. [You can see ingredients lists](https://www.t2tea.com/en/uk/terrific-toffee-loose-leaf-gift-cube-T125AE034.html) and I don't believe that none of the sugar would melt into the tea....I know that 3g of pure sugar is 12kcal so this would have less than that, but am I missing something here? Nothing has no calories, and particularly not things with nougat in lol.
What would you count this as? I know 12kcal might seem like a small thing to make a fuss over but I like to be in control of my calories :/
[Rant/Rave] small boobs (rant)
/u/yikes_dot_com [5'6 | 111 | 17.9 | F]
Created: Tue Oct 4 13:38:13 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55vcm0/small_boobs_rant/
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I know this has been discussed before on this sub but I absolutely cannot stand how small my boobs are. I don't even know my bra size because I don't wear a bra most days but I'm 20 years old and almost completely flat-chested. I understand there are great advantages to this and that really large boobs aren't a walk in the park either but it really sucks in terms of body image because it makes the rest of me look so much bigger in comparison. Like I can't have even a little bit of a stomach because it will poke out further than my boobs. Also they just seem to get smaller--I've lost 8 pounds in the past month and I'm pretty sure a not-insignificant amount of that was on my chest/boobs so it doesn't even count. And when I gained weight over the summer almost none of it went to my boobs. WTF?! Not to mention it makes me feel like less of a woman, like I'm not normal, can't fit in with other girls, boys won't ever be attracted to me...UGH.
(haha sorry just needed to get that out)
[Rant/Rave] I am hideous and it's getting worse.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Oct 4 13:37:56 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55vcjq/i_am_hideous_and_its_getting_worse/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] A guy I really, really like at work told me I am too skinny...
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Oct 4 13:14:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55v7xk/a_guy_i_really_really_like_at_work_told_me_i_am/
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[deleted]
[Goal] I am actually kind of proud of myself for the first time in years!!
/u/knobbje
Created: Tue Oct 4 13:00:53 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55v51m/i_am_actually_kind_of_proud_of_myself_for_the/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/50a892ab6ee44432956a5a4d904c3792?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=2301576d2460c6f8f0bf649a4f2e429a
[Help] After a TERRIBLE weekend, I'm going to try fasting today for the first time in ages...
/u/onlyroom_forthin [5'6 | CW:149.6 | 24.24 | SW:165 | UGW:120 | F]
Created: Tue Oct 4 12:13:47 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55uw01/after_a_terrible_weekend_im_going_to_try_fasting/
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So my weekend was great fun, I got to hang out with my family, went on a great hike, everything was fabulous. But EVERY outing in my life seems to end up revolving around food or booze. After our hike we had to go out to eat...my family took me out for dinner and then we stayed up late drinking and I drank an entire bottle of wine...after class yesterday we had to go get beers because life was just too damn stressful.
I get so frustrated. I want to go out and enjoy these things and NOT be worried about eating. But if I don't think about it, I end up binging and eating an uncountable amount of calories in one sitting. And if I do think about it, I end up stressing and obsessing about my intake and can't enjoy what should be a fun time with my friends and family.
Does anyone do something like fasting/eating very low cal during the week and then eating "normal" on the weekends or something? Like this week I my cousin's birthday is coming up so we are going out to eat. It's supposed to be a fun evening all about him, so I want to be able to eat whatever and be focused on my family and not on my calorie intake. I really want to fast today and maybe tomorrow, eat super low cal for the next few days, and then be able to eat a big dinner and have a few drinks with them over the weekend. I just don't know if I have the willpower/commitment to eat so little for three - four days, and that makes me feel like a failure.
To make up for this weekend and the coming dinner out I'm going to start fasting today and I guess just go as long as possible. I know all the tricks for fasting like drink lots of water, caffeine, EC stack (which, btw, I'm still too afraid to try, but I really want to), but I don't know how to commit! Any advice about commitment, or extra super secret tips about how to fast?
ps sorry this turned into a bit of a rant, I'm frustrated because I had SUCH a fun weekend but afterwards I just feel guilty and whale sized.
[Discussion] What was your most ED-looking purchase that you recall?
/u/Polski_lesbian [5'2.5 | 124.2 | 22.6 | Q]
Created: Tue Oct 4 11:49:25 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55urbc/what_was_your_most_edlooking_purchase_that_you/
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For instance, I remember going to the supermarket weekly on Saturdays, around this time last year, always buying two bottles of diet coke and a packet of laxatives...
I think everyone knew :o
[Help] Can someone help me figure out why I feel so ill?
/u/citrus_cunt [5' 9"| 139lbs | 19.5| +2lbs | F]
Created: Tue Oct 4 11:09:19 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55ujli/can_someone_help_me_figure_out_why_i_feel_so_ill/
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So I woke up this morning skupped breakfast and went to class per usual. Then I tried to workout on my empty stomach like I do every Tuesday morning....
But then I started feeling really bad. Like. weak and shaky. Lots of painful bloating. Hot flashes. Nausea. Barfing up the water I tried to drink.
Is it electrolytes? Is it bad gas? Or just plain old dehydration? I know I need to probably eat something, but even thinking of food has got me barfing...
[Discussion] Anyone else have narrow hips?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Oct 4 11:01:22 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55uhz2/anyone_else_have_narrow_hips/
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[deleted]
[Help] Buffet Brunch... [help]
/u/EmmaTurtle [5'8" | 141 | 21.21 | -24 | F]
Created: Tue Oct 4 10:29:56 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55uc7q/buffet_brunch_help/
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So Im kinda freaking out. Its my friends birthday this weekend and she planned for a group of us to get brunch together at this cute spot downtown. I was psyched until I found out that their brunch is actually a brunch buffet. I dont want to cancel on her but I know that if I go it'll trigger a huge binge.
Have any of you been in a similar situation? What did you do and how did you keep from overeating? Help.
[Thinspo] Rather Unorthodox Thinspo, but I love looking at pictures of Ball-Jointed Dolls
/u/lyxil [5' 0"| 93 lb | 19.13 | -47 | f]
Created: Tue Oct 4 10:09:27 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55u8i3/rather_unorthodox_thinspo_but_i_love_looking_at/
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http://imgur.com/a/WBteg
[Intro] Jesus Fuck
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Oct 4 10:08:56 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55u8er/jesus_fuck/
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[removed]
[Discussion] Daily Food Diary! October 04, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Tue Oct 4 10:02:13 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55u75l/daily_food_diary_october_04_2016/
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This is a daily food diary thread for October 04, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
[Thinspo] Daily Thinspo 💕
/u/BlackGirlSteeze
Created: Tue Oct 4 09:27:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55u0vg/daily_thinspo/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/15d54209a1394b8b9525e965cba3a929?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=6ff759246fa5033039e283f5109810b8
[Intro] BED relapse for the last 4 months.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Oct 4 09:02:51 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55twgd/bed_relapse_for_the_last_4_months/
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[deleted]
[Other] As Requested. Molli (left) and his brother Amadeus (right)
/u/BlackGirlSteeze
Created: Tue Oct 4 08:59:01 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55tvs5/as_requested_molli_left_and_his_brother_amadeus/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/246e8a5be1154a1db10c7e924aecff9f?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=326d85e4e64d9f0a2dedda075ab9b8d5
[Rant/Rave] Lowest weight ever but I look bigger than ever :(
/u/zoeglowey [5'2" | 104 | BMI 19 | - 23 | Female]
Created: Tue Oct 4 08:37:34 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55ts1u/lowest_weight_ever_but_i_look_bigger_than_ever/
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I have what my doctor thinks is an ovarian cyst and because of that, I literally look like I'm a couple months pregnant even though I'm only about 100lbs. I've never felt fatter. This blows. You can't even see my hip bones anymore :(
[Discussion] looking for support for endo and/or IBS sufferers
/u/tallgirlthrowaway13 [6'0" | 170lbs | 22.1 | -20lbs | F]
Created: Tue Oct 4 08:29:34 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55tqm2/looking_for_support_for_endo_andor_ibs_sufferers/
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hello lovely people.
so, in my intro, i mentioned that i have endometriosis. i also suffer from pretty bad IBS (that i'm almost 100% sure is related to my endo and the location of my adhesions, but i digress). does anyone else in this community suffer from fibroids, PCOS, endo, chrohns, IBS/IBD or anything along those lines?
it's hard enough to feel like i can find people to relate to with my conditions, but my disordered thoughts and eating add another layer of loneliness. for the past six months, i've definitely been worse in regards to the IBS (i had surgery for endo back in august so that's better thank god. i don't have a period anyone, bless), and i feel like garbage every day. i can't tell if i'm losing weight because i'm always bloated, and (TMI) i rotate between being horribly constipated or having painful diarrhea and gas, which means i feel like there's always something in me. i think feeling so bad has actually pushed my restricting to another level, because i want to at least look good even if i feel like my body is shutting down.
just wanted to put my feelers out there and see if people can relate.
[Discussion] What has replaced food in your life?
/u/CowOffTheFarm [65" | 145 | 24.41 | - | F | GW 120]
Created: Tue Oct 4 08:15:35 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55toa0/what_has_replaced_food_in_your_life/
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Now that i'm restricting I don't need to devote as much time and energy to food. I don't even need to think about it anymore but I find myself turning towards it out of habit. When i'm bored or upset I find myself planning a meal, looking for recipes. If it's particularly stressful I will plan a binge. Sometimes I even magically appear in the kitchen with my head in the fridge!
I guess it's sorta like a craving, but when I do eat it isn't satisfying. I don't really like the taste, feel guilty about the calories, or can just tell that I actively don't want the food.
But then BAM! I take another bite.
What can I fill my life up with? What has worked for you?
[Discussion] What is the quirkiest excuse you've made on the spot to refuse an offer of food?
/u/rukittenmerightnow
Created: Tue Oct 4 08:15:12 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55to7n/what_is_the_quirkiest_excuse_youve_made_on_the/
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"Fries kinda get stuck in my throat" Also, "no, I shouldn't eat that pizza because heart disease runs in my family and I don't really want to risk it." It was *one* slice of pizza 😂 any funny anecdotes?
[Meme/Humor] me IRL
/u/eightstone [Height: 5ft 7 | CW: 9st 12lbs| BMI: 21 | Gender: F]
Created: Tue Oct 4 07:36:15 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55ti1v/me_irl/
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https://i.redd.it/323fv1knngpx.png
[Help] Food question for Germans ;)
/u/ED2134 [168cm | fat | female| -10kg]
Created: Tue Oct 4 07:12:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55tef4/food_question_for_germans/
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Hi guys.
1. any sugestions in which grocerie stores I can get miracle noodels?
2. what kind of electrolyte drinks do you consume?
Low blood sugar
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Oct 4 06:45:50 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55tamd/low_blood_sugar/
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[deleted]
[Other] Happy bday to me
/u/rainbowsunshinedust [5'5 | 105 | 17.68 | GW 95 | F]
Created: Tue Oct 4 06:25:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55t83a/happy_bday_to_me/
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I haven't eaten anything yet and I can feel that haunting idea a binge is working it's way up...its October and pumpkin everything is fucking with my head lol. If I do binge, I know I'll just purge. Its hard to rationalize why eat the delicious food if I'm just gonna try to get rid of it, but that's the nature of the beast. I was 106 this morning like omg I don't know how since I drink so goddamn much but I also purged last night so I'm prob just fat and dehydrated but....I'll try not to go too crazy...no promises lol
[Discussion] Self-care and Beauty Q+A October 04, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Tue Oct 4 06:02:39 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55t52s/selfcare_and_beauty_qa_october_04_2016/
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Eating disorders are real, complex, and devastating conditions that can have serious consequences for physical health. Use this thread to discuss harm reduction and beauty tips, plus suggestions on how to build back up the physical self before and after engaging in disordered behaviors.
Please be wary of false advice and information. Be sure to research the facts before taking anyone's advice, no matter who they are. Remember that diagnosing members is unacceptable. **Anyone looking for medical guidance should seek the opinion of a medically licensed professional.**
*****
Self-care and beauty threads are posted every Tuesday.
Have any questions or concerns? Comment below, or [PM the mods.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FproED)
I love you guys
/u/DrDiagnonsense [Height | CW | BMI | Weight Lost | Gender]
Created: Tue Oct 4 04:32:15 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55sv0w/i_love_you_guys/
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[removed]
[Help] My heart rate is 47 BPM
/u/throwaway03199519 [glob]
Created: Tue Oct 4 01:56:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55sgmi/my_heart_rate_is_47_bpm/
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Is this like really low? What are all of your heart rates like?
[Rant/Rave] Gonna try living without having a scale. Also, any tips on cutting back on smoking and not going insane?
/u/Melusedek [173 | CW: 57.5 | GW ?? | 19.21/18.99 | F]
Created: Tue Oct 4 00:50:39 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55saad/gonna_try_living_without_having_a_scale_also_any/
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Sorry I haven't been very active here lately. This last month has been one big hectic blur. I might be joining a paper in addition to my thesis, my class is way more work than I was expecting, and I moved to a completely new place which means I've had to buy *everything*. The good thing is that I guess I now don't eat when I'm stressed instead of bingeing like I used to, so I got that going for me which is nice (though perhaps the constant intake of coffee and cigarettes has something to do with that :/). I actually reached my goal of being under 58 kg way ahead of schedule.
The best part of my new place is that I'm living with a friend which means the literal box of candy and chips (one for each, I wish I was kidding) is finally out of my life. Better yet, my friend doesn't keep much food in the house and just buys as she needs it (which means I can do the same AND there's no potential binge foods) and since her schedule is as hectic as mine I can get away with saying I already ate.
But now I don't have a scale. I haven't weighed myself since Friday and I'm going to see if I can just go buy how I feel/look instead of letting numbers dictate how I feel. There have been times where I felt good, but the minute I stepped on the stupid scale and saw a number higher than I was expecting (even if it was lower than yesterday) it would ruin my entire day. So I'm going to just restrict and maybe take measurements every once and awhile. We'll see how long this lasts. Good thing is that two nights of the week I'm out of the apartment and don't get back til late so that will make things easier.
I'm also going to cut back on smoking now that Hell Month is over, so restricting is going to be that much harder. Anybody have any tips on not eating a fuckton when you're cutting back on nicotine?
On another note, I've started taking a ballet class! 2 1/2 hours of working out plus motivation to look good in my leotard (and thinspo out the wazoo). Best spur of the moment decision I've ever made.
Wow this is longer than anticipated. Cheers to anyone who actually reads all of this.
[Help] Laxative abuse
/u/KajaIsForeverAlone [height:5'9 | CW: 147 BMI:21 | weight lost:15 lbs | Gender: F]
Created: Mon Oct 3 23:19:17 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55s0to/laxative_abuse/
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I think my body is becoming tolerant to laxatives and when I don't take them I don't poop
What do I do????
New addition to the family!
/u/BlackGirlSteeze
Created: Mon Oct 3 23:03:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55rz2z/new_addition_to_the_family/
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Okay so about 6 months ago me and my husband found a kitten. He was abandoned and we took him in and names him Molli. Today, my husband comes home with Molli's brother. Like his biological brother. He's so sweet and cute! Molli doesn't like him though. :( also my roommate said no more cats about 3 months ago. So now I gotta convince him to let Artemis stay. I'm already so attached. Any ideas?
today is the day.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Oct 3 21:30:17 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55rmyy/today_is_the_day/
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[removed]
[Rant/Rave] I feel so ridiculous.
/u/peanutbutteredbanana
Created: Mon Oct 3 21:26:05 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55rmem/i_feel_so_ridiculous/
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let me just say that I hate people posting pictures including me without me approving it. i just burst into tears when i saw a picture that my friend uploaded of me to Instagram. my stomach looks huge and bloated and my thighs look gigantic. she won't delete it and everyone i know is going to see me looking like a disgusting monster. the sad thing is that I've been feeling better about my body and this just ruined everything. this is so ridiculous, I know, but I had to vent :( i never want to eat again.
[Intro] intro/hand
/u/yikes_dot_com [5'6 | 111 | 17.9 | F]
Created: Mon Oct 3 21:07:05 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55rjrz/introhand/
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hey everyone -
been lurking this sub for quite a while under my main account, decided to make a throwaway so I could post. I don't even know if I really have an ED, I've never been diagnosed, but I've had body image issues for almost three years now. almost a month ago I started severely restricting and have since lost about eight pounds, which is awesome because I put on a little bit of weight working a food service job over the summer.
I've always been on the skinny end of normal--never been called fat in my life, also grew up in a very happy and healthy home environment (yes I'm aware that I'm incredibly lucky/privileged, and I'm super grateful), so I really have no idea how this came about. I was able to eat whatever I wanted as a kid and never gain weight, and I think over the years I suffered increasing paranoia that I would someday get fat because I loooooove junk food--the greasiest, grossest, most immature processed food you can think of, those are my faves--and have had self-control issues around it my entire life. I've also had ongoing social problems since I was a preteen and now I'm a junior in college with absolutely no friends at school. I spend all day that I'm not in class or at the gym alone in my room and it's really starting to take its toll, but restricting leaves me with no energy to care anymore.
anyway I'm excited to join this community because you all are wonderful. [here is my hand](http://imgur.com/a/PSSTF)
[Rant/Rave] Update and My Dog
/u/VowelsAreHard
Created: Mon Oct 3 20:43:16 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55rg8c/update_and_my_dog/
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So, four days ago I posted a thing, and some people expressed a desire for me to update on the situation. I was really upset when I posted the original thing, so I'll explain what happened momentarily, in case anyone cares. (I feel like I'm bothering you all, but I agreed to do this, so I'm going to.) In case you couldn't care less, [here](http://imgur.com/a/41unq)'s a few photos of my dog; he's a pretty princess.
Okay, so, I very nearly lost my entire future because a friend - ha - betrayed me. I was uncomfortable with how this guy was treating me, and I expressed that to the ~~friend~~. The ~~friend~~ then told him, so he was once again acting in a way that made me uncomfortable - how reassuring, at least - and threatened to send screenshots of our conversation so the ~~friend~~ would "know the truth". I don't play blackmail very well, it would seem, as I then sent the ~~friend~~ 64 screenshots - the entire conversation and the one before that. Since I was given an ultimatum, I informed him when I was through I had sent the ~~friend~~ all the messages, so he needn't worry. I then received a(n unnecessarily rude) text that he's "going to cover [his] ass".
An hour later, my mother gets a call from my boss that *she* got a call from *her* boss, that ***he*** got a call from one of my colleagues that I was going to kill myself. I had joked about that with only one person, my ~~friend~~, though I work with that aforementioned guy; and as previously mentioned, the two of them were in direct contact with each other. And because of the specifics of my job, I cannot keep it if I have severe psychological issues, i.e. suicidal tendencies.
For the last couple of days, I have been pretty worried about my future, therefore, as this all was my one and only plan for my life, and I was ***happy*** with it. Conveniently, there was a mandatory car wash where I was able to spend time with another boss (essentially equal to mine) and the boss' boss I mentioned above, so they could see firsthand that it was bullshit; unfortunately, the guy who tattled on me was also there. Today, I was asked about [thing that is utterly irrelevant if I am in danger of losing my job], and now am feeling secure - more or less - once again.
Oh, and the other girl that showed up to the carwash gossiped to me that he got demoted in pay (though apparently for an unrelated-to-me thing, and before he made that call); not only does that make him seem less credible, but also ***sweet, sweet karma***.
In conclusion - wait, you actually read all of this? I'm beyond flattered; thank you - I am finally snapped out of my ever-eating-over-my-goal cycle of the previous week (stress) and am able to participate(ish...I still feel uncomfortable posting; comments, though, I can manage.) on this subreddit once again. (Oh, and I'm dyeing my hair again - he liked the pink
and I didn't - so now it's going to be teal, assuming it comes out right. Yay!)
**<З** ***Thank you all so much***. **<З**
[Help] How did you react when your disordered eating started causing other health issues?
/u/explodingrhinoceros [5'7" | CW: 166.0 | BMI: 25.9 | SW: 220.0 lbs | GW: 125.0 lbs | F]
Created: Mon Oct 3 20:12:33 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55rbjs/how_did_you_react_when_your_disordered_eating/
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I had an appointment with my PCP today and he was concerned about my overall weight loss (just about 55 pounds since the 1st of the year). We talked at length in regards to my eating disordered behavior. I was taken off of spironolactone for my PCOS as it's a diuretic and I've begun taking more than prescribed. He warned that it could do serious damage to my kidneys, and I might be put on Metformin instead.
He also put me on beta blockers as he viewed my past trends of high pulses and a few EKGs I had done. It was some form of sinus tachycardia, I wonder if it is from my excessive caffeine use, poor liquid intake, or occasionally taking Ritalin. He wants to do more testing next month.
Finally, my blood tests came back this evening on my patient portal. It showed an elevated bilirubin level, which according to my Google MD degree (lol) can indicate liver damage. For comparison, my last result was 0.9 a month and a half ago. Today it was 1.8. I'm also having some mild pain on my right quadrant. I hope it's not my gallbladder.
What happened when you started having other health problems? I'm really scared right now. I haven't been on the "ED track" very long, I've probably only met the criteria for 4 or 5 months now.
Anyone out there?
[Goal] Hit underweight today! Here's lil gremlin ol' me 🤗
/u/throwaway03199519 [glob]
Created: Mon Oct 3 19:34:47 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55r5vl/hit_underweight_today_heres_lil_gremlin_ol_me/
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http://i.imgur.com/iVtvQOd.jpg
[Rant/Rave] Oh my God I ate 1260 calories today at panda express alone T~T
/u/KajaIsForeverAlone [height:5'9 | CW: 147 BMI:21 | weight lost:15 lbs | Gender: F]
Created: Mon Oct 3 19:11:04 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55r28v/oh_my_god_i_ate_1260_calories_today_at_panda/
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Kill me please
[Discussion] Hey lovies, I've always wondered what it was like to be in someone else's body
/u/rainbowsunshinedust [5'5 | 105 | 17.68 | GW 95 | F]
Created: Mon Oct 3 18:17:48 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55qu9r/hey_lovies_ive_always_wondered_what_it_was_like/
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So would you trade bodies? And disorder patterns? Sometimes I think I would. I feel like my eyes don't even see the correct reflection anymore because of dysmorphia. If I could trade bodies with someone for a day, I definitely would. Its be a learning experience for sure.
[Rant/Rave] fuck. that.
/u/EmpireStateBitch [5'4" | CW 120 | GW 115 | UGW 100 | F]
Created: Mon Oct 3 18:06:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55qsjo/fuck_that/
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Leaving the gym after watching my ex flirt with just the most attractive skinny beautiful girl, as she prances around in just her sports bra and short shorts while I feel like a total slug as I battle my period bloat. Fuck that. Just fuck that. I was going to eat dinner, I think I'll just skip it, since that sight made me want to vomit anyways.
[Rant/Rave] Stopping EC stacking and terrified! :(
/u/teacupshattering [5'11.5 | CW: 165 | 21.89 | F]
Created: Mon Oct 3 17:49:32 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55qpvb/stopping_ec_stacking_and_terrified/
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Hey Guys!
I've been getting mild chest pains almost everyday so I figure that maybe I should stop EC stacking. This might be a dumb question but should I also go to a doctor? I have decent health insurance at the moment, so I could go for free. I want to stress that I'm not a complete idiot----I would have stopped sooner if any of the pain was severe but it's more of a dull ache and it never occurs directly after I take it. But due to the consistency of the pain, I think I should stop.
I just really don't want to and am really quite terrified that I will gain weight if I do. I kind of loved EC-stacking because it let me forget about hunger/food for half the day and was actually pretty great for my productivity. I guess I just wanted to complain to some people about this (since I can't tell anyone in real life...).
[Discussion] pear shapes?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Oct 3 16:41:41 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55qesv/pear_shapes/
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hey everyone! i've been a longtime lurker and i'm finally posting here for advice because this community seems nice, honest, and sincere!
i'm pear shaped; and i'm wondering at what BMI did your thighs start looking "good"?
i really struggle with body dysmorphia because i don't identify as a female but rather as androgynous - so my thighs are a huge downer to my self esteem. it just gets worse whenever my mom constantly comments about how "curvy figures are attractive" etc.. when i honestly just want a 'boyish' figure.
if any of you have any selfies, progress pics, or anything that can give me hope that my thighs will look better; or even advice on what to do - it would be seriously appreciated! its just frustrating because i keep on losing weight from my upper body, but theres absolutely no change in my thighs...
thanks guys!
[Intro] A Long Depressing Tale
/u/FattTea [Height 5'4"| CW 185.4 (SW 215.0) | Weight Lost -29.6| F|]
Created: Mon Oct 3 16:26:45 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55qcdf/a_long_depressing_tale/
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Hi everyone.
So for the past couple of months I have been lurking on this sub, but I felt that it is time to properly introduce myself.
I have been fat all my life and I am so sick and tired of it. When I was a little kid my mom (who has also struggled with her weight all her life) would constantly compare me to my friend, who was thin. She would go on about how “big boned” me and my siblings are as if she had to justify my weight to herself (I didn’t care about my own weight as a ten year old kid). Puberty was absolute hell, as every part of my body ballooned horrifically. I got immediately massive boobs and gigantic hips.
I was in the 150s in my mid teens, reaching 170lbs by the time i graduated. Things just got more horrible for the three years I lived at home after graduating, and I binge ate to deal with the stress my mom caused me. Things all went totally nuts when I started dating my girlfriend, my parents are “traditional” (homophobes) and they lectured me constantly for even hanging out with her (they knew she is gay, but only suspected me) and talked loudly about me at night which I could hear through the floorboards.
So I couldn’t sleep, ate constantly, and lived in general terror that they would kick me out as soon as they found out I’m dating this girl.
Now add to that the fact that my younger sister lost about 40 pounds off of an already small body, making me feel like a disgusting whale in comparison. (she most certainly has an ED but my parents never got her to go to a doctor or anything for it since she didn’t seem sick enough or whatever)
So basically I finally put my foot down and I moved out with my GF. My parents fiercely disagreed with this decision and my mom for some reason thought a good reason for me to remain at home is that we won’t be able to control ourselves and I will get fat.
So in order to get control of my life, and to say a big “fuck you, mom” I’ve been restricting. I started pretty slow, only losing about 15 pounds in the first three months (from a starting weight of 215 so yes I am a literal elephant), but lately I have been doing about 750cal a day and things are moving a lot faster, I’m at about 23 pounds lost total now.
If you read this far, you deserve a medal you wonderful soul.
I lost weight but I look even fatter...freaking out
/u/raspberryfleur [5'6 (finally properly measured) | 130 | 21.0 | -30 | Female]
Created: Mon Oct 3 16:19:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55qb7y/i_lost_weight_but_i_look_even_fatterfreaking_out/
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[removed]
[Tip] [25 cal each] Sweet, crunchy, and filling!
/u/lyxil [5' 0"| 93 lb | 19.13 | -47 | f]
Created: Mon Oct 3 15:42:24 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55q4t8/25_cal_each_sweet_crunchy_and_filling/
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http://i.imgur.com/ayNTbOD.jpg
[Help] Limiting myself to weekly weigh-in
/u/c_marier [5'6"| 113.4| 18.3 | -13 | 22F]
Created: Mon Oct 3 15:25:45 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55q1tl/limiting_myself_to_weekly_weighin/
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My fluctuating weight is killing me. It's endlessly frustrating getting a constant range of numbers depending on water weight, food density, salt etc. Getting a bad number, beating myself up, and then pooping for the first time in two days and realizing that was probably why is just so frustrating (sorry for tmi).
I'm going back to allowing myself one weigh in per week. That way it will actually reflect weight lost, as my habits will be the same - avoiding salt and skipping dinner the day before, etc. It'll be more accurate that way right? Thoughts?
[Help] Sorority expectations
/u/cheeekyslug [5'6" | BF: 26% | - 55lbs | 19/F]
Created: Mon Oct 3 14:57:05 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55pwl4/sorority_expectations/
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Good news, I got into my top preference sorority! Bad news, I went to bid day and realized I was inadequate to their standards.
I remember going to preference day and the girl I was speaking to told me she's proud to be in the sorority because the sorority is always striving to be the best. Whether that's to triple major, going to as many abroad programs, or just being the best at partying, you're always expected to beat the normal standard.
My class that I'm currently in is full of really amazing girls, and I'm getting along with them. All the sisters are really nice, too. But yesterday I felt so shitty, like I didn't belong with them.
We were getting our pins and we had to stand in a circle. All the pretty girls had thigh gaps. I don't even think I'm close to getting one. Then later that night, I get about 60~ new facebook friend requests and another 60~ or so on instagram from my sorority. Each girl was literally perfect; bikini pics in Europe, day party pics, etc. They were literally goals.
I'm nervous about the socials and all the frat stuff. I know frat guys can be really closed minded, and I rather not go through the awk low-self esteem shit at parties, and socials are optional but I don't want to miss out on too much. I also feel like I have a represent my Greek letters and I would hate to be the girl that puts the whole sorority down.
Most girls in the sorority are thin and beautiful and I felt extremely average and dull. While there isn't any girl that looks as if she does have an ED, I know that ED's are pretty secretive in sororities. I've been having a weird month since August, a lot of weight fluctuation, but really just hitting a plateau. I know Halloween is coming up and I really don't want to look like shit. Ideally if I can lose 20lbs more this month, I'll feel somewhat better.
Has anyone gone through sorority stuff like this? Does your ED intensify even more with this? I'll admit, it is stressful, but I also feel like it's a motivation to not fall behind. Any support would be really helpful, lol tbh I'm not sure how to feel about everything
[Other] So I found a new calorie tracking app, and it's the best.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Oct 3 14:40:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55ptlk/so_i_found_a_new_calorie_tracking_app_and_its_the/
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[deleted]
[Discussion] Did anyone ever promise themselves they'd never develop an ED?
/u/GiveMeASmosh [5''2' | 101.2lb | 18.5 | -13lb | f]
Created: Mon Oct 3 14:29:49 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55pri8/did_anyone_ever_promise_themselves_theyd_never/
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I remember when I told myself id never get an ED, I'd never let it go too far. Yet I did. Reducing the amount I ate turned into counting calories. Maintenance turned into restriction, which became fasting. This all would have been fine, I told myself... As long as I never binged. Which I started doing. It was all ok, as long as I never purged. And now here I am stuffing my face right now all the while knowing in just going throw it back up. And yet I keep letting it happen.
[Thinspo] Daily Thinspo 💕
/u/BlackGirlSteeze
Created: Mon Oct 3 14:04:07 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55pmn3/daily_thinspo/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/06c654956f3f4ee689ddb7f2f3948cf9?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=d929cb96451622f5ac01fa875a246fe4
[Discussion] Cross post from r/bodybuilding. What different body fat percentages looks like on men and women
/u/mermaid_puppy [5'11" | 137lb | UGW 115 | F]
Created: Mon Oct 3 13:22:04 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55pefe/cross_post_from_rbodybuilding_what_different_body/
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http://www.builtlean.com/2012/09/24/body-fat-percentage-men-women/
[Help] pms + weigh-ins + remedies?
/u/texas_native [5'6" | 118 | 19.05 | F]
Created: Mon Oct 3 12:34:35 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55p5em/pms_weighins_remedies/
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my pms has been so bad this month, coming a week early and like the worst boob pain ever. this only happens every so often, but my boobs are like 4 times as big as they are normally and hurt so bad. any suggestions? also haven't been able to weigh myself in a week as i'm scared these stupid things have added 15 pounds and i can't bear to look, whyyyy does pms have to exist? i miss my birth control but i don't want to keep taking hormones :(
[Rant/Rave] Errrr... colleague just told me to eat. Feelsweird.jpg
/u/gastastic [5'1 | 118.4 | 26F]
Created: Mon Oct 3 11:57:04 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55oya0/errrr_colleague_just_told_me_to_eat_feelsweirdjpg/
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My coworker just pinched me on my arm and said, "it's lunch time. Go eat." All I could think to say was, "oh, is it?"
10 minutes later, I went with my other coworker to get food and came back empty handed. She said "it's my life goal to make you eat", and laughed to make light of it. I just didn't even respond.
It makes me incredibly uncomfortable. Not to mention, I pretty much eat all my calories for dinner. I just can't trust myself to eat throughout the day because I lean more toward binge than restrict and have to keep myself in check.
[Rant/Rave] Don't you just hate it when...
/u/fuckyeahglitters [5'7 | 126 | 19.87 | -30 | F]
Created: Mon Oct 3 11:54:45 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55oxte/dont_you_just_hate_it_when/
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I just had a long, crappy day at work. I saved up some calories today so I could treat myself to a beer. Like half a liter of German goodness. 230 Cal. Was feeling slightly better and suddenly a girl walks into my train coupe, total thinspo, and takes the seat right across from me. I feel like such a fat cow now. Fml. Finishing my beer anyway cuz I hate spending money and I ^^just ^^want ^^alcohol....
So, what can always fuck up your day when you've planned a nice evening?
[Tip] My beautiful delivery 😍 (feat. Fat fingers, ugh)
/u/DenyMyHunger [5'7"| Fat! | UGW:112| F]
Created: Mon Oct 3 11:53:29 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55oxkx/my_beautiful_delivery_feat_fat_fingers_ugh/
---
http://imgur.com/VjiVEdQ
[Thinspo] 💕
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Oct 3 11:51:49 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55ox98/_/
---
https://i.reddituploads.com/27e89c53467b488892abd4698e990839?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=a2eda22ac25c0ab7cac7ca2d56a55173
[Other] Messy room but I liked my tiny tiny tiny gap today. Also posting this because my fingers are absolutely not cute enough for the hand train.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Oct 3 11:42:52 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55ovjx/messy_room_but_i_liked_my_tiny_tiny_tiny_gap/
---
https://i.reddituploads.com/6c93814f9ae14dd3a22099fd9e31f9cb?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=1ac39109533ed7d0c2a6b579950a7642
[Intro] When your parents make comments about your weight
/u/dontcareifithurts__ [5'4.5 | 117 | - 4.2 | F]
Created: Mon Oct 3 11:34:41 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55otyh/when_your_parents_make_comments_about_your_weight/
---
Hi there, first post.
I'm currently planning a wedding, which is triggering enough as it is considering all the stress that goes along with it. I've lost 3 pounds in the last few weeks and joined the gym again, so things are looking good. But next week I have an appointment to try on wedding dresses, and my mom continues to make comments like "people will like anything you try on as long as it doesn't make you look fat" and "here, drink this..." *hands me drink* "it will help get rid of your belly." 😒
Did I mention I'm only 118 pounds at 5'5? I know I feel like a giant bloated dead whale carcass, but there is still a part of me that recognizes I'm not literally "fat" in other people's eyes. At least I'm not supposed to be. (For the record, my lowest weight was 98 and I maintained a weight of exactly 100 pounds for 2 years, and then was able to maintain something between 107 - 112 for many years after that. My mom praised me for looking great the whole time I was at my worst. Being anemic and having kidney stones and being depressed and self-harming and just generally failing to thrive in life. The rest of the family was "concerned" but my mom thought I was "beautiful".
I've never been in treatment so she doesn't know the extent of my problems, but she knows enough that she shouldn't be saying things like this.
Anyone else's mom like this?
[Intro] Quick Intro
/u/inpursuitofslimness [5'3.5" | 129 lbs | 23 | -8 lbs | Female]
Created: Mon Oct 3 11:15:27 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55oq90/quick_intro/
---
Hello,
A quick intro:
* I've been lurking for months and finally decided to make a new account for posting here.
* Growing up, my mother was a constant dieter and when I was in college, my sibling was hospitalized for anorexia. As a result, I have a lot of experience with ED treatment and recovery and the impact ED has on the family of those who go through it.
* I was one of those "naturally skinny" people when I was younger so the constant dieting atmosphere never got to me, but I am now on the high end of "healthy" for my height and weight and all those memories are fresh in my mind.
* I have never been diagnosed with an eating disorder, however as you can imagine from my second bullet, I have a very difficult with relationship with food and losing weight. I struggle with finding the balance everyday. I have food restriction tendencies and I can see in myself the same things that lead my sibling down the ED path. I am pretty sure the only thing that has always kept me from spiraling are the memories of what it was like when my sibling was in the hospital and the fact that I can't risk being a trigger for my now recovered sibling.
Although I don't technically have an ED, I have a lot of experience both with having someone close to me going through an ED and recovery, and with my own internal fights with not sliding too far myself. This seems like a great supportive community and I hope I can add some value by being here.
Thanks!
Edited for formatting.
[Rant/Rave] I'm food greedy and crazy.
/u/mermaid_puppy [5'11" | 137lb | UGW 115 | F]
Created: Mon Oct 3 10:55:55 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55omhf/im_food_greedy_and_crazy/
---
Last week, I engaged in a mini-binge, which included me finding my sister's cheese whiz and eating it with a spoon. I am not proud of this. A few days later she texts me and cheese shames me, which is fair because I did eat her food without asking. I replace the cheese, and everything is fine.
This morning I get up, go to grab a quest bar, and discover she took my quest bar and replaced it with one of her quaker granola bars. I suspect she was just tired of her granola and thought it wouldn't be a big deal to switch out the bars. To her credit, she didn't just take my food. She made an effort to replace it with her own.
But guys. Quaker chocolate chip bars are not the same as a protein dense quest bar. I buy those protein bars specifically for their nutrition, and I purposefully avoid granola bars because to me, they're glorified candy bars that don't keep me full. I got irrationally angry about it! I know I did the same thing to her, but the difference is, I ate her garbage food and she ate my healthier food. She doesn't care about the nutrition of garbage food, but I'm obsessive about the amount of protein I eat. So of course she thinks she did nothing wrong (especially compared to my eating her garbage cheese whiz and NOT replacing it until she noticed) and I can't make a big deal about it because she would never understand why I'm so upset about a protein bar.
I am food greedy. And no one would understand the stress of losing a carefully selected food except for you guys.
[Discussion] Daily Food Diary! October 03, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Mon Oct 3 10:03:12 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55ocop/daily_food_diary_october_03_2016/
---
This is a daily food diary thread for October 03, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
[Discussion] Conflicting in-real-life thinspo...so unsure of how to feel. Racing thoughts, two voices, & repeating mantras.
/u/fckk [5'4| CW 120lbs | 20.60 | GW 115 | F]
Created: Mon Oct 3 09:54:53 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55ob53/conflicting_inreallife_thinsposo_unsure_of_how_to/
---
I'm currently sitting in Panera with a black iced coffee getting some work done.
There's an AMAZING LOVELY DELICATE LARGE-COZY-SWEATER-CHUNKY-WHITE-SHOES-WEARING BEAUTIFUL ASIAN sitting across from me doing work on her laptop.
She is DEAD UP comparable to the K-Pop girls.
But, she's eating :(:(:(:(:(:( A BAGEL. My trigger binge food, ESPECIALLY FROM PANERA. Cue the two battling voices in my head.....
I woke up today thinking, "Okay, today is new. It is a Monday. It is the very beginning of October, your favorite season. It is chunky sweater weather, you can lose a lot of weight quick OR slowly and no one will notice, just have fun with it but go in the downward direction. There is no rush, you can do this. Everything is clean and crisp and you are a delicate beauty flowing through the fall air, going from productive activity to productive activity, excelling and remaining delicate all the while. New start, new start, fresh start, real start." I then got myself up and walked through the fall nature, admiring it all and floating on my way to Panera. Sipping on my refreshing black iced coffee, and sat down here, glamorizing the "productivity in a coffee shop while thin and sophisticated and caffeinated."
If you can't tell, I like to romanticize life while restricting. It gives me that extra high, extra manic and productive edge.
Anyway, I see this girl and I'm like "okay yeah, fixate on her, she is inspiration to remain so delicate and not cave." But then I see her eat and my mind IMMEDIATELY says, "See, she can eat that bagel and remain so thin, so can you. It's one bagel, it'll be your only meal today or you can start over tomorrow, it's Monday and you have off anyway...you know what yeah, just make it a binge day."
Then I snap back to it and I'm like, "NO BE STRONG, THAT'S WHAT TODAY WAS ALL ABOUT. OVERCOMING THIS EXACT URGE" And I force myself to actively get back into that "romanticize" mindset and tell myself I'll get my fav flavor greek yogurt and some fruit on the way home.
Then it creeps in so subtly, "Yeah, but you're AT Panera, just buy food here. It IS chunky sweater weather, so you CAN hide a tiny bit of weight gain too. And we'll fix it, it'll only be temporary."
The TWO VOICES, BOTH SEEMINGLY UNCONTROLLABLE. It becomes a true battle. But I want to overcome this today, right now.
I'm re-peating the mantra "If it was easy, everyone would do it." over and over and over to get through this tough point. I'll feel powerful and amazing once I leave without a bagel.....
[Other] Saw myself in the gym mirror, +10 points confidence.
/u/citrus_cunt [5' 9"| 139lbs | 19.5| +2lbs | F]
Created: Mon Oct 3 09:42:43 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55o90t/saw_myself_in_the_gym_mirror_10_points_confidence/
---
http://m.imgur.com/a/YBenD
[Goal] i had my wisdom teeth out this summer and couldn't eat for 4 days
/u/clamshells [5'7 | 115 | 18.0 | f]
Created: Mon Oct 3 09:10:35 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55o3e3/i_had_my_wisdom_teeth_out_this_summer_and_couldnt/
---
https://i.reddituploads.com/2905a56bcb764b0f87f281f3c00e5d87?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=780c309e74b7d3df5f2d8d2c362ec510
[Meme/Humor] The moment that you cave in and succumb to the binge.
/u/EDWebDev [5'6" | 156.6lbs | fat | 79 | F]
Created: Mon Oct 3 08:42:13 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55nyiy/the_moment_that_you_cave_in_and_succumb_to_the/
---
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YL4bjCyk_54
[Discussion] DAE use food to hurt themselves?
/u/strongerthanyouknow [5'5" |145 |24.4 | -12 | F]
Created: Mon Oct 3 08:13:38 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55ntvt/dae_use_food_to_hurt_themselves/
---
I'll eat things that are going rotten, or foods that I don't like. Mostly recently I've been overeating fiber and sweeteners so that it leaves me bloated, cramping, and full enough to burst. It also just feels safe because high fiber stuff is low cal.
[Goal] I wish my legs looked like this when I'm standing
/u/tallskinnywannabe8
Created: Mon Oct 3 07:59:15 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55nrgt/i_wish_my_legs_looked_like_this_when_im_standing/
---
http://imgur.com/E7npoX7
[Tip] something I read when I fell down a hole on Wikipedia
/u/ppyeoreul-mudgosipeo [5'6 | 2 Days w/o Binge | BMI 26.9 | F]
Created: Mon Oct 3 07:17:01 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55nlbc/something_i_read_when_i_fell_down_a_hole_on/
---
>"All that I have given to my stomach has disappeared, and I have retained all the fodder I gave to my spirit." --Callimachus
I wrote it down in my journal to remind me that nearly anything else in the world is better for me than bingeing. Meditation, going for a walk, reading, coloring, *anything.*
[Discussion] DAE hate coffee but drink it anyway?
/u/citrus_cunt [5' 9"| 139lbs | 19.5| +2lbs | F]
Created: Mon Oct 3 07:13:04 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55nkq8/dae_hate_coffee_but_drink_it_anyway/
---
I used to be legitimately addicted to coffee, to the point where it was actually hurting me instead of helping. I was sooooo hooked!! I eventually stopped drinking coffee, and now I can't stand the taste (still love the smell tho). Now I *adore* tea, but [[ tmi ]] it doesn't come close to giving me the digestive kick I need in the morning.
So I drink 1 cup in the morning as a punishment born out of necessity I guess? It's sort of like ACV, it's super gross but I drink it when I can because I know it's helpful.
It's like? So nasty I'll tell myself as I drink it "this is what happens bc you can't get your life together, If you had better willpower you wouldn't have to rely on shit like this" or "this is what happens when you binge"or "if you can stand this, you can deal with what's coming"
Does anyone else do this?
[Meme/Humor] Had a town idiot tell me this joke at the ren faire-
/u/citrus_cunt [5' 9"| 139lbs | 19.5| +2lbs | F]
Created: Mon Oct 3 06:20:25 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55ndq3/had_a_town_idiot_tell_me_this_joke_at_the_ren/
---
Did you hear about the bulimic showgirl they hired for the birthday party?
The guests sure weren't expecting to watch the cake jump outta *her*!!
[Discussion] Why is self-image so slow to catch up?
/u/_saisonenenfer [175cm | not thin :( | M]
Created: Mon Oct 3 06:08:29 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55nc7u/why_is_selfimage_so_slow_to_catch_up/
---
I remember years ago where you could see my ribcage and it felt okay not to worry. But after a long period of depression, anxiety and social phobia it went downhill. I'd forget or not care about my body, I'd eat when I was feeling sad but i still had an idea in my mind that i was OK. And honestly I'm just now slowly realizing and coming to terms with what I've done to myself. I've never felt more disgusted with myself. I feel like Betty from Mad Men when she's fat. Idk have you felt like this?
[Discussion] Weekly Stats Update! October 03, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Mon Oct 3 06:03:44 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55nbjk/weekly_stats_update_october_03_2016/
---
This is the weekly status thread for October 03, 2016.
The weekly status thread is to help motivate our users, and to eventually see how far they've come! Be it for weight loss, weight gain, or maintaining- everyone is welcome. Previous updates are archived [here.](http://www.reddit.com/r/proED/wiki/archives)
Please include the following information (with all necessary units of measurement):
* Height:
* Current weight (CW):
* Highest weight (HW):
* Lowest weight (LW):
* Goal weight (GW):
* Ultimate goal weight (UGW):
* Weight lost (WL):
* BMI: ([Use this to calculate your BMI](https://people.maths.ox.ac.uk/trefethen/bmi_calc.html))
* Age:
* Gender expression:
Here's a handy-dandy copy/paste of the above format:
* Height:
* CW:
* HW:
* LW:
* GW:
* UGW:
* WL:
* BMI:
* Age:
* Gender expression:
*****
Status threads are posted every Monday.
Have any questions or concerns? Comment below, or [PM the mods.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FproED)
[Rant/Rave] I love living on my own ♥
/u/Polski_lesbian [5'2.5 | 124.2 | 22.6 | Q]
Created: Mon Oct 3 04:55:50 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55n459/i_love_living_on_my_own/
---
I feel like I just binged, you know, the really uncomfortably full feeling, but because I only have the food **I** buy for **myself** in my apartment, the total for today actually came around 150 calories below my maximum - if I was living with my family, I'm sure I would've been stuffed on bread, peanut butter and bananas!
I'm counting this as a victory, and a reminder to never buy anything other than safe foods ;)
[Rant/Rave] I get so close to my goal then spoil it with a binge.
/u/Casablanca_Insomnia [5'3 | TOO MUCH | -21 | GW: 87 | F]
Created: Mon Oct 3 04:27:59 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55n1ic/i_get_so_close_to_my_goal_then_spoil_it_with_a/
---
I binged properly today for the first time in ages. Five ice cream bars, a bowl of soup, tater tots and a whole fucking packet of dried mango. I didn't even enjoy it and now I'm gonna have to work the rest of the week to get the water weight off and reduce my appetite again. So close to my first goal and so annoyed at myself. Wanna purge so badly but i promised my friend/flatmate that I wouldn't. Oh and I ate two mini muffins as well. No wonder I'm a fat fucking slob.
Too scared to count but I know I should :(
First Time Fasting
/u/venetianrosequartz [5'6"|CW 142|HW 145|LW 130|GW 135|UGW 112|WL -3| BMI 22.9|Female]
Created: Mon Oct 3 04:14:53 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55n0b6/first_time_fasting/
---
[removed]
[Discussion] What kind of rewards do you have for reaching smaller goal weights?
/u/aerienne [5'5" | 145.8 | F]
Created: Mon Oct 3 04:12:11 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55n01u/what_kind_of_rewards_do_you_have_for_reaching/
---
I finally have a scale again and although the number was devastating, I feel so much more in control now. I made my list of weights to cross off and various goals. I want to make some small rewards, but I'm unsure. It has to be frugal. Some people put a shopping spree or tattoo for UGW, but I'm thinking smaller things.
I was just curious to know some of the things you guys have used as rewards and I can make mine from there.
[Discussion] What kind of rewards to you having for reaching smaller goal weights?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Oct 3 04:11:22 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55mzzj/what_kind_of_rewards_to_you_having_for_reaching/
---
[deleted]
[Help] Hi all would like some help!
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Oct 3 03:22:37 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55mvi5/hi_all_would_like_some_help/
---
[removed]
[Thinspo] Monday 💕
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Oct 3 02:39:31 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55mrub/monday/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/55494e9d6b3a48a8b753aaba0a09df61?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=29d57a4271c15e9b64a57dca87f853e5
[Tip] A food safe that only unlocks after a set time...I want this
/u/kingkilling [5'2" |CW 114 | 20.9 | -14 | F]
Created: Mon Oct 3 00:59:22 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55mj4z/a_food_safe_that_only_unlocks_after_a_set_timei/
---
http://www.thekitchensafe.com
[Tip] Homemade coffee tip
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Oct 2 23:06:13 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55m7q0/homemade_coffee_tip/
---
Hey everyone, I haven't posted for a while.. some anxiety problems.. but I'm back and so glad to be here :)
**What you'll need:**
* Almond milk
* Ground coffee
* A glass percolator[ \(like this\)](http://www.dhresource.com/200x200s/f2-albu-g2-M00-7E-89-rBVaG1ZQZkaAGjZjAAHcxIVYY2w650.jpg/stainless-steel-tea-maker-glass-coffee-pot.jpg)
* Boiling water
This morning I discovered that you can make froth in a percolator. I'm always trying to find a good way to make coffee that is low cal, vegan and doesn't taste terrible.
I took almond milk and heated it up in the microwave (you could do this on the stove top), and put it into my percolator and plunged it and it turned into froth! The texture is so nice. I put the black coffee (that I made in the percolator too) into my mug and then put in the froth.. Depending on the ratio of milk to coffee, it could only be about 20 calories.. It tastes just like a cappuccino!! So warm.. I needed something other than black coffee.
If you have any additionally tips you should comment them :)
[Goal] NSV, pants edition.
/u/KillingKylie [5'5| Meh|-38|F|GW: 97]
Created: Sun Oct 2 22:52:01 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55m62b/nsv_pants_edition/
---
My favorite jeans have gotten too big to the point that they are starting to give me what I like to call "saggy diaper ass". I decided to try on the smallest pair of jeans I own, the ones I bought as motivation to fit into by x-mas; they fit.
They wouldn't even go over my hips 2.5 weeks ago and now they button, zip and are fairly comfortable. Guess I need some new goal pants.
[Discussion] Every-other day fasting?🤔
/u/rukittenmerightnow
Created: Sun Oct 2 22:11:03 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55m10m/everyother_day_fasting/
---
Hi, I've just joined r/fasting and someone wrote about "every-other day" fasting to lose and keep the weight off. As I'm seeing it, you basically skip food for a day and the next day eat what you like in sensible portions. Have any of you don't this? I have never done a fast before but am trying this tomorrow. Thank you!!
[Other] Does anyone know how much Audrey Hepburn weighed?
/u/taeyeons-comrade [perpetual shame]
Created: Sun Oct 2 21:50:05 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55lyc4/does_anyone_know_how_much_audrey_hepburn_weighed/
---
Ive heard 103, 105, and 110. I just wanna know the real weight...I'm terrible :(
[Meme/Humor] What do you call an anorexic with a yeast infection?
/u/throwingupstones
Created: Sun Oct 2 21:30:51 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55lvn1/what_do_you_call_an_anorexic_with_a_yeast/
---
A quarter pounder with cheese...I'm so sorry
[Discussion] How long did it take you to lose a considerable amount of weight?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Oct 2 20:56:53 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55lqul/how_long_did_it_take_you_to_lose_a_considerable/
---
[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] I screwed up.
/u/ForeverEmptyInside [5'9"| CW:115 lbs | BMI 17 | LW:104lbs | M]
Created: Sun Oct 2 20:50:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55lq0j/i_screwed_up/
---
Ahh yes - a good old rant. I need one of these.
Recently my track record has been pretty good. I recently did a 7 day fast, and I did another weekish of 500 calories only. Things were going well.
Today was suppose to be only 500 calories... I'm at Uni and have to eat in the dining hall. Luckily there is a calorie and nutritional information available online. So everyday I always plan out exactly what I am going to grab before I go down there.
Today I was going to grab a tofu and spinach dish. Surprisingly it was low in calories but high in protein. I went down, and ate. It wasn't until after I was finished eating that I realized I grabbed the WRONG dish. I looked back at the online menu and I ate about 200 or so more than what I thought. In my mind I /completely/ ruined the 500 calorie day and had a mental breakdown.
I wasn't able to get any work done. I just felt so out of control. For SOME REASON I thought Oreos would help me emotionally. Holy fuck that was a bad idea. I ate probably around 2-3000 calories worth of junk food in my hysteria. Then I thought it would be a good idea to step on the scale.
10 pounds.
I gained 10 fucking pounds.
I worked so hard for a month to lose 15 pounds.......
The rational part of my brain knows this is just water weight and I most likely only gained a pound or two from this whole dilemma. But still I am so dissapointed in myself. I showed a completely lack of self control. I DESERVE to be punished for this. So here is my game plan
1) I took a diuretic (Flush out salt & water weight)
2) I took a laxative (Flush out water/food weight)
3) I'm going to fast for 5 days.
Im hoping the diuretic and laxative combination will help get rid of the water weight ASAP. I know it doesn't get rid of "real" fat weight, but It'll at least make the scale seem normal. My hope is that the 5 day fast will help me burn the actual weight I put on and maybe a little more...
Does this plan sound reasonable?
I usually don't do the Laxative thing but sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do.
[Discussion] What do you think of people who are attracted to underweight people, or those with eating disorders?
/u/throwawaybadperson12
Created: Sun Oct 2 19:14:49 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55lc9e/what_do_you_think_of_people_who_are_attracted_to/
---
Not just those who are unaware of the costs and struggles, but someone who understands the difficulties or problems involved.... and still is attracted to underweight people?
Is that creepy, relieving, or what do you find it?
[Help] Anyone else feel lonely?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Oct 2 19:10:28 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55lbl8/anyone_else_feel_lonely/
---
[deleted]
[Hand] I've got a long, long way to go 🙁
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Oct 2 19:08:03 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55lb7r/ive_got_a_long_long_way_to_go/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/7d269e5cc6e3499dad64a743e358da8c?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=c11d046f3e5ad120ff0d3790eb982edb
[Rant/Rave] At least legs don't look bloated
/u/thirdocean
Created: Sun Oct 2 19:01:56 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55laay/at_least_legs_dont_look_bloated/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/56e4977540c04da4b340f3f2cfa89846?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=1baaaf6f6d3e66a1f34bef21c4dad27f
[Intro] I found my way back here again.
/u/fattynomnoms [67.5|192|29.48|-38]
Created: Sun Oct 2 19:01:41 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55la9q/i_found_my_way_back_here_again/
---
Months ago I thought I could handle things on my own. I don't know why I thought that, seeing as "on my own" is how binge eating fucked myself over to begin with. I may be an outlier, but coming here was actually helping me resist binges and manage my weight normally. Hopefully I can get myself back under control again. 😢
[Rant/Rave] I miss it.
/u/Pitaia [1.70cm | CW: aaaHHAHA | BMI: ? |GW: S M A L L|GQ]
Created: Sun Oct 2 18:55:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55l9gy/i_miss_it/
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I miss being truly disgusted by food. I miss having weird eating habits. I miss restricting with so much ease. I miss summer vacation and working out excessively whenever I wanted, I miss feeling empty and a concave stomach. I miss watching my legs shrink day by day by day and my pant size shrinking along with them. The perfect pair stuck on the hanger which I slid into like I was made of butter and now just simbolizes the constant battle and back and forth of no longer eating so little; eating "normally" or putting the snacks back in the cupboard, nauseated by the thought of putting something other than gum or water into my mouth.
I had it so easy. The constant paranoia didn't allow me to enjoy it. "She's so thin I have a long way to go". "Body check." "Body check." Over and over. I don't think I ever learned how to be happy or satisfied, content, well.
Losing control of my appetite
/u/SecretEDaccountOMG
Created: Sun Oct 2 18:48:04 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55l8bs/losing_control_of_my_appetite/
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[removed]
[Discussion] Surviving Thanksgiving?
/u/cutflowersound_ [5'8 | CW: disgusting | GW: not disgusting | F]
Created: Sun Oct 2 18:31:31 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55l5xh/surviving_thanksgiving/
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For those of us in Canada, Thanksgiving is right around the corner. Tonight I had my first of three (!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!) Thanksgiving dinners this year and almost had a complete meltdown. Everything is rich and ridiculously unhealthy, even the veggies were covered in butter. I'm expected to take a full plate, and I don't know how I'm supposed to deal with two more nights like this one.
How do you get through the holidays without completely self-destructing?
[Help] My boyfriend and I are complacent and it's making me fatter.
/u/get-it_together [5'3 |160??| UGW 125 | F]
Created: Sun Oct 2 17:25:42 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55kvtv/my_boyfriend_and_i_are_complacent_and_its_making/
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[removed]
Update on my Interview at the ice-cream shop.
/u/BlackGirlSteeze
Created: Sun Oct 2 17:09:17 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55ktd1/update_on_my_interview_at_the_icecream_shop/
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[removed]
[Discussion] A Question...
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Oct 2 16:03:28 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55kitp/a_question/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] My friend just told me you don't lose weight if you eat less than 1000 calories
/u/pinotblanc [5'3 | GW:115 | 23.2 | -23 | F]
Created: Sun Oct 2 15:07:47 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55k9rx/my_friend_just_told_me_you_dont_lose_weight_if/
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And I got so angry!! I basically told her "it's my body and I don't really care what other people have to say about it." If i don't comment on how much you eat why do you get to comment on how little I do? Also, that's actually not true. At all. If you burn more than you consume you lose weight. I get so irritated when people just blindly say things without having any information to back it up.
[Rant/Rave] there's a chap on the loseit sub right now who ate 500cals a day for 230 days
/u/eightstone [Height: 5ft 7 | CW: 9st 12lbs| BMI: 21 | Gender: F]
Created: Sun Oct 2 14:39:19 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55k4ti/theres_a_chap_on_the_loseit_sub_right_now_who_ate/
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I can barely manage 30 without a binge. And he went to the gym for 2 hours a day every day. And he doesn't consider himself to have an ED. He makes it look so easy. I feel pathetic. No excuses. I am a greedy bastard.
[Rant/Rave] Excess skin not only exaggerating body dysmorphia, but now weight dysmorphia apparently. Don't know how to feel.
/u/fiddlydiddly [5'4 | 125 lbs | 21.9 | -115 lbs | F]
Created: Sun Oct 2 12:53:12 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55jmhp/excess_skin_not_only_exaggerating_body_dysmorphia/
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Hi everybody
As you can see in my flair, I've lost a bit over 100 lbs. As a result, I ended up with extreme sagging skin everywhere (not the kind that tightens up over time). I've already had it removed from my arms, stomach and breasts three years ago when I was around 160 lbs. I had bad thighs and back/butt, but the others were the worst so I did them first.
I've since had an ED relapse (was bulimic before my surgery, now just restricting) and dropped about thirty more pounds. My breasts are sagging extremely again (but still too big -.-), and my back and thighs are worse than ever. Worth mentioning that I've been stuck in this 125-130 lbs area for a while now. I went back in to see my surgeon about scheduling surgery in the future to fix these areas, and during the appointment I mentioned how I was trying to lose a bit more weight before the surgery so I could be as small as I can be and not have to go under the knife again.
She told me she understood, but that I have approx 5-10 lbs of skin with adipose tissue "stuck" to it that I would not be able to get rid of, so to not go overboard with more weightloss.
!!!!!
5-10lbs?!! Is that even possible?!
I've been considering sticking with maintenance for some time now, I've been eating around my sedentary TDEE while doing 1-2 hours of HIIT cardio and walking a day, so technically at a deficit but not losing anything but hopefully gaining muscle. I have a 25" waist, and I'm a big clothing/thrifting junkie and I am now experiencing issues finding clothes that fit and I can't begin to imagine how much harder it would be if that got smaller. I'm also emotionally so much more stable, less irritable and better in school since eating more.
These among other reasons have pushed me towards maintaining this weight, but I hate this number! I've been working hard to create a calorie deficit with exercise with no luck, obviously. I'm extremely frustrated, and conflicted about how to feel over this. I can't be in control anymore, I just have to sit and wait for it to get removed.
blah vent rant. Anybody have any experience with this?
[Discussion] Where does everyone like to shop?
/u/hereyesarethesky [5'6" | 128.2 | 20.78 | -27]
Created: Sun Oct 2 12:41:17 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55jkh8/where_does_everyone_like_to_shop/
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I mean clothes shopping and the sort, not groceries! I personally used to shop at Kohl's for the longest time until I got into the mall and realized there were better places. Now I shop at Tilly's, Azkara, and sometimes Forever 21. Too scared to go into Hollister and Abercrombie haha
[Hand] My freakish hand
/u/Pitaia [1.70cm | CW: aaaHHAHA | BMI: ? |GW: S M A L L|GQ]
Created: Sun Oct 2 11:19:00 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55j6an/my_freakish_hand/
---
http://imgur.com/jgK0oX8
[Rant/Rave] My ex found someone else.
/u/Fanashit [5'4" |130 | 22.75 | -55lbs | F]
Created: Sun Oct 2 10:25:11 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55ixax/my_ex_found_someone_else/
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I was invited over to meet his friend.
His friend who he spent the whole evening nuzzling his cheek against and rubbing her thigh.
He has an art show he needs to prepare for in a year and he mentioned needing models and asked if I'd be interested.
Maybe he'll want me back if I can reach my goal. I love the idea of undressing and revealing bones and seeing his shock and admiration.
Maybe I'll like myself a little better, too.
I'm the one who's always there for him when life falls apart and he needs someone, but he can't even warn me of what his friend is...? I knew he would find someone else but it would have been nice to have some warning before seeing that...
[Help] Broke down crying 30 mins into my run...
/u/TinyTinyCleverCDR [156 cm | 50.8 kg | 21.73 | -7.7 kg | F]
Created: Sun Oct 2 10:20:13 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55iwhg/broke_down_crying_30_mins_into_my_run/
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I don't know why. I just feel so heavy. I tried to keep going but it's overwhelming. How do I make it stop? I haven't met my exercise goal yet. I can't fail today.
[Thinspo] More Hannah 💕🌸🎀
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Oct 2 10:17:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55iw1u/more_hannah/
---
https://i.reddituploads.com/767660e775b844aaa8a67bd7263fa780?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=5662ad3be3fa320eb0cac464e559412b
[Rant/Rave] I'm back
/u/Healthilyornot [5'2" | 146lbs | -47lbs | F]
Created: Sun Oct 2 10:04:19 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55itwl/im_back/
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I thought I could relax around food.... and so I went on basically a month-long binge and gained 10lbs. I'm so sick of myself. So for about 2 days now, I'm back to doing what I need to do-avoiding food as much as I possibly can because I'm so grossly addicted to it.
[Discussion] Daily Food Diary! October 02, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Sun Oct 2 10:02:21 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55itka/daily_food_diary_october_02_2016/
---
This is a daily food diary thread for October 02, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
[Hand] Hand with a side of fat legs
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Oct 2 10:01:38 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55itgd/hand_with_a_side_of_fat_legs/
---
https://i.reddituploads.com/a5fb675b4e3d4e158024e1333fe4ba5c?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=84dda3a742d7956a3d900a6a5f34815a
[Thinspo] It's the small, casual comments that give me the biggest rush of exhilaration.
/u/fckk [5'4| CW 120lbs | 20.60 | GW 115 | F]
Created: Sun Oct 2 09:54:34 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55isbh/its_the_small_casual_comments_that_give_me_the/
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I'm visiting my boyfriend for the weekend. My boyfriend, his roommate (a friend of mine too), and I were all having a morning smoke and talking about ways to pass a drug test in case we were ever given one-week-notice for any reason. His friend said to me, "Well for instance, you have like almost no body fat at all so you could literally work out really hard all week and get rid of THC in your fat".
I was casually like, "Right right, exactly" and inside I was like ":):):):):):):):):):):):D:D:D:D:'D"
It's one thing when someone comments on your weight as a compliment like, "Oh you're so thin", because then my head can warp their intentions and tell me they're "humoring me" because I've "actually put on wait" (ED delusions). But when someone makes a comment about your weight in a casual, factual conversation where there can't be room for 'ulterior intentions' it's validating :):)
No one, NO ONE, would appreciate the excitement of this except you guys. So happy I have you.
<3
Edit because I spelled "weight" "wait" lolololol i'm really stoned and really caffeinated (panera has bomb black iced coffeeeeee) so my mind and fingers and legs are going a million miles per hour. About to go on a nature walk to burn extra calories effortlessly. ENJOY YOUR SUNDAYS:)
[Thinspo] 💕 Hannah 👌
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Oct 2 09:46:37 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55ir2k/hannah/
---
https://i.reddituploads.com/f0ae8dccb0614b989bd83b4ca92e3880?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=915aa60d39e1ef31bbb0892b45557ad6
[Help] Chipotle is the devil (TMI)
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Oct 2 09:29:12 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55iod3/chipotle_is_the_devil_tmi/
---
[deleted]
40-Day Fast
/u/heltermierz
Created: Sun Oct 2 09:18:41 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55imr4/40day_fast/
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[removed]
[Discussion] Happy Sunday! Do you have any goals for this upcoming week?
/u/YourChinaDoll [5'1" | SW: 169 | CW: 124.8 |F]
Created: Sun Oct 2 09:09:31 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55ile6/happy_sunday_do_you_have_any_goals_for_this/
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If every day this week I stay within 10 calories of my budget, don't b/p, eat completely vegan, go to the gym after work, stretch, make my bed, do 10 push-ups, wash my face and brush my teeth before bed, and have all my homework done the night before, then I'm buying a vegan pizza on Sunday to reward myself! Does anyone else have goals or rewards for this week?
[Goal] i was really pleased with how my arm looks in this photo!
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Oct 2 08:54:01 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55iize/i_was_really_pleased_with_how_my_arm_looks_in/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/fb14cb17aa614fee9de8814ec218f64a?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=2776ddc61118d834866d303407db0234
[Intro] Intro
/u/Pitaia [1.70cm | CW: aaaHHAHA | BMI: ? |GW: S M A L L|GQ]
Created: Sun Oct 2 07:45:35 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55i9r0/intro/
---
Hi everyone! I thought I should introduce myself and not just creep around. Here's a bit about me:
I got diagnosed just this year, although it was first atributed to my OCD. Along with an ED there's a variety of other mental health issues but that's not important right now.
Thankfully I've been on a steady decline for a while now, but due to some disgusting and frustrating binging I've gone up about 2-3kgs from my LW so I'm trying to get these babies off asap and I can go from there. Wish me luck! Much love, xo
[Discussion] I keep seeing this ad on Instagram. Has anyone tried it?
/u/ChubbyBunny8 [5'2" | 135 | 25.58 | -15 | F]
Created: Sun Oct 2 07:43:37 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55i9ic/i_keep_seeing_this_ad_on_instagram_has_anyone/
---
http://www.eatenlightened.com/#products
[Other] trans/nb people of proED....
/u/woollyshirt [5'7.7 | 116.4lbs | 17.69 | -77.6lbs | M/NB]
Created: Sun Oct 2 07:41:42 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55i99b/transnb_people_of_proed/
---
I've made a new private subreddit to discuss how being trans/having dysphoria can intersect with having an ED: r/transproed
There aren't that many of us but I know I personally feel quite vulnerable talking about things that are a big part of my life where my ED has intersected with dysphoria and medical transition etc so I thought that both myself and others could benefit from this subreddit.
Message me or comment here if you want to be added. I don't mind if you're nb, questioning, genderqueer, whatever. I don't care to police who is trans or dysphoric or queer enough to join but if you feel that you are comfortably cisgender then this subreddit is probably not relevant to you!
It is private so only people I approve can currently see the posts. I'd really appreciate help modding too so if you have experience with that PM me :)
[Thinspo] Model rookies are my body goals.
/u/rizzle_riz [5'4' | CW:141 | 24.89 | -18 | F]
Created: Sun Oct 2 07:41:37 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55i993/model_rookies_are_my_body_goals/
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http://imgur.com/a/QDqRi
[Other] post-binge selfie
/u/eightstone [Height: 5ft 7 | CW: 9st 12lbs| BMI: 21 | Gender: F]
Created: Sun Oct 2 07:19:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55i6kx/postbinge_selfie/
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http://vignette2.wikia.nocookie.net/slaveleia/images/e/e3/Jabba_licks_his_lips_in_anticipation_of_victory.jpg/revision/latest?cb=20110107202120
[Thinspo] A bunch of people, compared to whom I look like a slug
/u/eightstone [Height: 5ft 7 | CW: 9st 12lbs| BMI: 21 | Gender: F]
Created: Sun Oct 2 07:15:22 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55i64q/a_bunch_of_people_compared_to_whom_i_look_like_a/
---
http://imgur.com/gallery/cfnHC
[Discussion] What was your binge to end all binges?!
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Oct 2 06:51:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55i3hd/what_was_your_binge_to_end_all_binges/
---
[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] I just love this sub.
/u/fishysandwich [5'3.5 | 120 | -25 | F]
Created: Sun Oct 2 06:44:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55i2ov/i_just_love_this_sub/
---
I love how supportive you all are. In other subs I'm always afraid to express myself because people can be harsh sometimes, but here I'm always comfortable to ramble on about things I couldn't tell anyone in real life. Thanks so much 😊
[Meme/Humor] I'm so lonely
/u/eightstone [Height: 5ft 7 | CW: 9st 12lbs| BMI: 21 | Gender: F]
Created: Sun Oct 2 05:05:18 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55ht2x/im_so_lonely/
---
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cM1ERk91N5w
[Thinspo] I want these legs.
/u/eightstone [Height: 5ft 7 | CW: 9st 12lbs| BMI: 21 | Gender: F]
Created: Sun Oct 2 04:26:49 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55hpw5/i_want_these_legs/
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http://littlerichgirl.typepad.com/.a/6a0120a6b6d001970b0120a6d472db970b-800wi
[Rant/Rave] I just binged. Once a month is okay, right?
/u/eightstone [Height: 5ft 7 | CW: 9st 12lbs| BMI: 21 | Gender: F]
Created: Sun Oct 2 03:52:42 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55hn4k/i_just_binged_once_a_month_is_okay_right/
---
3 fried eggs, 1 tin of beans, 1/2 avocado, 2 bread rolls with butter, 7 caramel wafers, 2 chocolate hobnobs. The pain in my stomach is immense. going to hurl. This is really going to hurt my progress. what a fucking idiot.
[Rant/Rave] 'Suffering' with an ED - pissed
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Oct 2 03:19:19 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55hkhf/suffering_with_an_ed_pissed/
---
[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] My boyfriend just told me he misses how I used to look
/u/throwaway03199519 [glob]
Created: Sun Oct 2 01:41:10 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55hctl/my_boyfriend_just_told_me_he_misses_how_i_used_to/
---
I used to be 130-135 at 5'6. It's kind of hilarious that he said this though because he's been so interested in sex as opposed to like three months ago. I think he just doesn't wanna admit that he thinks I'm more attractive now after losing weight from my ED.
[Meme/Humor] When imgur gets too real :(
/u/goddamnroommate [5'6" | 143.8 | 23.30 | -50ish | F]
Created: Sun Oct 2 00:27:13 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55h6ob/when_imgur_gets_too_real/
---
http://i.imgur.com/sVz0lE1.jpg
[Help] Anti-Depressants, effect on appetite?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Oct 2 00:13:32 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55h5gm/antidepressants_effect_on_appetite/
---
[deleted]
[Hand] Joining in the hand hype 🖐🏽
/u/Angusburger69
Created: Sat Oct 1 23:56:47 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55h3uw/joining_in_the_hand_hype/
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http://imgur.com/PAly7ve
[Goal] Is this the ultimate goal?
/u/Pineapple__Jews
Created: Sat Oct 1 23:23:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55h0jc/is_this_the_ultimate_goal/
---
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=c62Aqdlzvqk
[Help] Question of the Day
/u/BlackGirlSteeze
Created: Sat Oct 1 20:50:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55gizb/question_of_the_day/
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What's are 3 habits of yours? (non ed related)
Mine are: I smoke cigarettes.
I bite my nails.
I only eat odd amounts of food.
[Goal] NSV, finally
/u/sorryqueen [5'2" | dreadful | F]
Created: Sat Oct 1 19:56:44 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55gc97/nsv_finally/
---
Hi all, long time no see? University is back and taking up literally all my time, so sorry I haven't been around y'all. My life has been me chugging along slowly, not really losing but not gaining either.
Anyway, I ordered some pants online about a week ago and they finally came in. I ordered the same pants, same brand in the same size I was earlier in the spring.
Guess what? THEY WERE TOO BIG. I'd never been happier to make a return and I'm officially a pant size smaller. Happy fall to me!
[Discussion] What do you do to burn extra calories?
/u/thirdocean
Created: Sat Oct 1 19:55:03 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55gc1z/what_do_you_do_to_burn_extra_calories/
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I know this sounds weird and it's not stuff I count, but I do 5-10 squats when I go to the bathroom. It adds up with how much water I drink. I also try to do mini push-ups by leaning against the counter. Idk. I'm curious if anyone else does these kind of things??
[Rant/Rave] Trying to quit binging, does it get easier?
/u/FeedMeDreams [5'5" | 64.4kg | 23.7 | F]
Created: Sat Oct 1 18:36:50 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55g1mg/trying_to_quit_binging_does_it_get_easier/
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After 5 years of bulimia I have no idea what normal eating is like. I had planned a no-purge month for October, because I'm much less likely to binge if I know I can't purge after. Already failed and need to start again. I hate failing my resolutions on day 1, but it happens to me all the time. I wish I could go back to stimulant ADD pills, but I don't want to go through the hell of addiction and quitting again.
Does it get easier to not binge? I feel like I'm always hungry, like there's something wrong with me. Normal people don't get this hungry. I can eat 10,000 calories and not even notice. Purging is the only reason I put on 10kgs instead of 50kgs. I dunno where I'm going with this. I don't think I can do it.
[Other] I will hate myself, no matter how little I weigh
/u/eightstone [Height: 5ft 7 | CW: 9st 12lbs| BMI: 21 | Gender: F]
Created: Sat Oct 1 18:32:12 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55g0zv/i_will_hate_myself_no_matter_how_little_i_weigh/
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When I am 8 stone I will still be a piece of shit. But at least I will be a smaller piece of shit.
[Hand] Guess I'll join in! Seriously need to trim my nails.
/u/Hiyoheyyo
Created: Sat Oct 1 18:26:51 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55g094/guess_ill_join_in_seriously_need_to_trim_my_nails/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/493de607b9fd45828c7ebc4d6c37c757?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=aa903de18baa34d008c84d5a1e7d017a
Are we bored of hand pics yet?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Oct 1 18:16:01 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55fyoo/are_we_bored_of_hand_pics_yet/
---
https://i.reddituploads.com/a86d08f4d53044dd8f4d02b2e94329bc?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=a05ef239b703852c9a7671849106f312
[Rant/Rave] managed to not break
/u/hereyesarethesky [5'6" | 128.2 | 20.78 | -27]
Created: Sat Oct 1 17:08:56 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55fpc1/managed_to_not_break/
---
so today my dad had to work a booth at the fair, so we're at the fair and there are food stalls everywhere and at first i dont really care because im motivated (woke up today at a new low 136.6) but as the day goes on my mood drops because my mom isn't the best person to be walking around a fair with. anyways long story short i only had an iced coffee over the countless things my mom tried to buy and force on me and im kinda proud but now they're taking me out to dinner so we'll see
[Thinspo] British model, Jourdan Dunn
/u/verakitty [5'4"|CW 108lbs |18.5 |-12lbs |GW 105 |UGW 99 |F]
Created: Sat Oct 1 16:57:55 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55fnnu/british_model_jourdan_dunn/
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http://imgur.com/a/LZYIn
[Discussion] LJ crossovers?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Oct 1 16:50:22 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55fmlf/lj_crossovers/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] I love it when my friend talks about how little she's eaten by accident
/u/archerofdawn [154cm | CW 157 | GW 88 | -7 | NB]
Created: Sat Oct 1 16:48:29 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55fmbp/i_love_it_when_my_friend_talks_about_how_little/
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I love it :) so much :)))) I love it so much that I'm :) going :) to die :)))))))))))))))))
Like thanks for reminding me that it's effortless for you :))))))) I'm gonna do a fast :)))))))
[ on mobile, can't flair hghhh ]
Update on my interview.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Oct 1 16:45:15 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55flvu/update_on_my_interview/
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[deleted]
[Help] Question of the Day :
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Oct 1 16:03:52 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55ffos/question_of_the_day/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] I'm 2 days into my fast, and I'm given a HOMEMADE CHOCOLATE TWINKIE
/u/KajaIsForeverAlone [height:5'9 | CW: 147 BMI:21 | weight lost:15 lbs | Gender: F]
Created: Sat Oct 1 15:45:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55fcrt/im_2_days_into_my_fast_and_im_given_a_homemade/
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Shit! My options appear to be 1. Cheat and eat it. 2. Chew and spit. 3. Eat it and then purge right after. 4. Don't eat it.
What do I dooo T_T
[Intro] belated intro from a different account
/u/K_iwi
Created: Sat Oct 1 15:27:32 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55fa0a/belated_intro_from_a_different_account/
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Hi! I'm the actual egg person (im withholding the full username for anomity purposes ish) from a different account. This one is for this sub only, mostly because someone called me out on the other account and i don't want to start any brigading. Anyways, I just wanted to clear that up that im not exactly new, just a new account :p ive been on here for a few months, but i still don't know what goes into an intro! Haha, well, i guess I'll start by saying that I'm constantly stuck in the vicious cycle of fasting, binging, restricting, fasting, binging, yada yada. Ive always had disordered eating, but it peaked when I ballooned up to like 157 and looked like a gross meatball. Im down to 125 (got down to like 120, binged back up, currently on restriction again).
Bleh this is getting weird, but i love the community and Im ready to reach my goal weight already lol
[Other] Prevented a binge.
/u/rizzle_riz [5'4' | CW:141 | 24.89 | -18 | F]
Created: Sat Oct 1 14:48:50 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55f3u7/prevented_a_binge/
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Okay I didn't choose to prevent it but more like the big bowl of cocoa puffs with fatfree milk was expired and thickish. I didn't notice until i had poured both into the bowl and took a bite. It was gross and then I figured this was a sign from the universe (or whatever) to stop before this lead to more unhealthy eating lol. I feel kind of good now even though had the milk not been expired I would have probably inhaled that bowl of cereal without a second thought. Now i've opted for a healthier option and am still within my calorie range!
[Help] Fast heartbeat on break EC stack days?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Oct 1 14:10:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55exme/fast_heartbeat_on_break_ec_stack_days/
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[deleted]
[Discussion] Does anyone else feel trapped by food?
/u/vhenah [5'7 | 133.6 | 20.85 | -86.4 | MOO]
Created: Sat Oct 1 13:35:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55es21/does_anyone_else_feel_trapped_by_food/
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Title says it all really. When I'm not fasting I feel so preoccupied about what I'm going to eat next and when I can't muster up the willpower to either skip a meal or eat something remotely ok it makes me feel anxious because I veer right into ~~clown~~BingeFiesta. It's been happening a lot lately.
[Intro] Introduction
/u/skinnieme [66" | 132lbs | 21.39| F]
Created: Sat Oct 1 13:30:50 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55er88/introduction/
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The guys -- I used to be a pretty frequent poster here until someone in my real life (where everyone THOUGHT I was better) found my posts. So I created a new account that I'll use pretty much only here.
So, I've been both under and over weight because of my ED -- moderation is not my thing.
I started dieting when I was in middle school and I started fasting/purging in high school. I got "better" for a long time and really packed on the pounds. Sometime last year I snapped and lost 35lbs in 4 months and was actually looking kinda good.
Flash forward to now: have gained back about 15lbs. Trying to regain some of my control. Just trying to do it with a but more sanity mostly so that I don't have my loved ones too worried too soon since they all know about my past.
That's basically my story.
-SkinnieMe
PS I love how sane you guys make me feel. Being able to talk so casually about things that make people in the real world concerned is so lovely.
PPS I have stubby, ugly hands and this new hand trend is making me so jealous.
[Hand] wanted to join in on the trend :)
/u/lordjoji [5'3" | CW: 101 lbs | 18.39 | GW: 100 lbs | F]
Created: Sat Oct 1 13:01:48 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55emdu/wanted_to_join_in_on_the_trend/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/f78ea5d51f4b48eaba60eee8d2628754?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=5720c6a8262f2e0f8617386874fcc83c
[Hand] Debated posting this but here's a favorite from two vacations ago
/u/Laricia [5'4" | 108 | -2 | GW 95 | F]
Created: Sat Oct 1 12:35:59 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55ei94/debated_posting_this_but_heres_a_favorite_from/
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http://imgur.com/a/bzETP
[Goal] B/P woes and first day of the C25K
/u/rbracket [5'2" | CW 99.4lbs | GW 99lbs | BMI 18.83 | M]
Created: Sat Oct 1 12:16:17 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55ef1r/bp_woes_and_first_day_of_the_c25k/
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I caved to (unintentional) pressure from friends while out yesterday and binged terribly, then purged as soon as I got home - I'm guessing I ate something like 3000+ kcal after only five days of immaculate sub-400 restriction and got maybe half of it back up. The only reason I stopped eating was because my stomach hurt from stuffing in so much fat and carbs, it was just disgusting.
Today I woke up still feeling terrible about the whole fiasco and how little self-control I had, so I decided that I'm going to better myself by starting the couch to 5k programme. Even though I already exercise daily, I'm quitting smoking and neglect my cardio over the shame of puffing and panting after running for two minutes. I don't have much vocal stamina when I sing either, so I'm hoping a real cardio routine will help me with that.
The first day was, surprisingly, great fun. Dressed up in the obligatory obnoxiously neon workout gear and got out the running shoes I bought a year ago but never use, which was satisfying in and of itself. Plus I got an app to time and motivate me, like a little AI personal trainer, which is just super cool. Day one was a five minute brisk walk to warm up, then eight reps of one minute running/1.5min walking, followed by a five minute cooldown. It voiced over my music perfectly and coincidentally picked the perfect tunes for my mood. The app even gives you little rewards when you complete a day; I got a rainbow skin (I was over the moon, I'm gay and love collecting rainbow themed things!).
The run itself was hard on my poor tar-stained lungs but I did it, feel a lot better about myself for doing it, and I'm definitely going to continue. Fingers crossed I can make the full 5k and my UGW (95lbs) and that it's not an impossibility for me to have both!
I did makeup for the first time in awhile. Meh.
/u/BlackGirlSteeze
Created: Sat Oct 1 11:56:28 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55ebq0/i_did_makeup_for_the_first_time_in_awhile_meh/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/fff4ae17db364935b97e4147959e4832?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=7bd0552e380052c0a9205ec882aa136b
[Rant/Rave] Holy Shit monster energy zero
/u/not_an_actual_egg [5'3" | 126lbs | 22.9 | F]
Created: Sat Oct 1 11:55:04 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55ebhy/holy_shit_monster_energy_zero/
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Why didn't anybody tell me how good this stuff was
(Also the can feels so pretty)
((also also i may have chugged the can and i may or may not be regretting that decision immensley bc my stomach is very upset with me))
Brb gonna blow the money i just got on a case of this stuff
[Hand] Just like everyone else :p
/u/copofteashirt
Created: Sat Oct 1 11:05:49 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55e3b3/just_like_everyone_else_p/
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http://i.imgur.com/Vjfl9YG.jpg
[Discussion] Daily Food Diary! October 01, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Sat Oct 1 10:02:10 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55dsqw/daily_food_diary_october_01_2016/
---
This is a daily food diary thread for October 01, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
[Rant/Rave] "surprise! we're going to a restaurant!"
/u/smallpaint [6'2" | 170lb | M]
Created: Sat Oct 1 09:19:26 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55dm8w/surprise_were_going_to_a_restaurant/
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me, fighting back rage tears: o really? :)))
[Thinspo] Thinspo - every time you say 'no thank you' to food you say 'yes please' to thin
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Oct 1 08:22:05 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55ddzi/thinspo_every_time_you_say_no_thank_you_to_food/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/237ca1d724454a489b397f1446f24372?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=bbc5794c3b576985fc4e987d15b87d23
[Help] Can't stop smoking...
/u/passthetablemanners [5'2 | 130 | 23.7 | -15 | 21F]
Created: Sat Oct 1 08:18:15 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55ddgh/cant_stop_smoking/
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I know, I know, not exactly an original thought, 'hmmm, I can smoke to stall my hunger'.
I just honestly never thought I would become so addicted. Sorry for the mini rant, I'm just pissed off at myself, I have bad asthma and I know how gross smoking is. I don't wanna stink or look yellow or have bad skin! I want to look good... But smoking stops me eating all day, I've already gone down a dress size.
Why is life so paradoxical?
[Thinspo] Daily Thinspo. 💕
/u/BlackGirlSteeze
Created: Sat Oct 1 07:55:42 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55daf0/daily_thinspo/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/64ed78a202a3402baf82cfb5382efaed?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=761ac45c73ad946fb85384fbf1b782b1
[Goal] Fasting.
/u/BlackGirlSteeze
Created: Sat Oct 1 07:54:55 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55dabq/fasting/
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I just remembered how determined I was to do whatever I wanted when I was a kid. Did depression get in the way? Or am I just lazy? I'm fasting today. Its gonna be hard bc my husband got paid today. But I can do it. Starting in 6 minutes. At 10 am. I had a bit of candy just to even it out. Wish me luck.
[Rant/Rave] I hate rollercoasters
/u/In_a_fatsuit [64" | 119# | 20.9 BMI | -104# | F]
Created: Sat Oct 1 07:47:44 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55d9fd/i_hate_rollercoasters/
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I ate like shit for a week. Finally back on track, approaching hour 60 of my fast. And of course there's an event today that I absolutely CANNOT get out of. If I don't eat, it will raise every red flag ever. My BFF struggles with anorexia so she would pick up on it immediately (she has literally asked me to weigh myself in front of her, to which I obliged because her concern was out of sincere kindness and my weight is totally in the healthy range still so she can't say shit haha)
I just....ugh. I'm so fucking anxious over this. I'm sure I'll drink. Hello, extra calories....
Hoping talking it out will make me less nervous. I fully intend on a complete EC stack before I put on my party attire. The food will be gourmet and amazingly delicious; I need to maintain control. But I'm worried that will make me MORE nervous.
[Discussion] 'Stupid Questions' Saturday! October 01, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Sat Oct 1 06:02:24 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55cwzm/stupid_questions_saturday_october_01_2016/
---
This is the weekly 'Stupid Questions' Saturday thread for October 01, 2016.
Use this thread as an opportunity to ask any questions you might have that you feel don't necessarily warrant their own post.
Please be wary of false advice and information. Be sure to research the facts before taking anyone's advice, no matter who they are. Remember that diagnosing members is unacceptable. **Anyone looking for medical guidance should seek the opinion of a medically licensed professional.**
*****
Have any questions or concerns? Comment below, or [PM the mods.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FproED)
[Goal] I have collarbones again!
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Oct 1 05:38:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55cury/i_have_collarbones_again/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/7b0fb44923dc48069d6e9e8651c08dac?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=02d29acfc5ed29e9b5a49d8438139a49
[Help] Best caffeine pills?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Oct 1 05:33:33 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55cu9e/best_caffeine_pills/
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[deleted]
[Tip] Exercise tip - hope you guys like it!
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Oct 1 05:13:36 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55cshj/exercise_tip_hope_you_guys_like_it/
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[deleted]
[Thinspo] thinspo!! wish i could pull that off :(
/u/knobbje
Created: Sat Oct 1 02:51:37 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55cglt/thinspo_wish_i_could_pull_that_off/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/1163bbd68c3341fd9fa8599b6ada0a9c?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=96314978743b6222cfac682f369f8e7f
[Help] birthday coming up
/u/wyydean [5'3| CW125lb | GW100lb | F]
Created: Sat Oct 1 02:18:23 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55ce21/birthday_coming_up/
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how do i politely tell my family i dont want a birthday cake? i dont think i can get out of not eating cake right in front of them
[Goal] October will be a no purge month.
/u/lordjoji [5'3" | CW: 101 lbs | 18.39 | GW: 100 lbs | F]
Created: Sat Oct 1 01:35:11 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55caez/october_will_be_a_no_purge_month/
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I recently started purging and I hate it so much but it is very addicting. I really want to go back to just restricting and so I'm challenging myself to not purge for a whole month. I'm posting this here so y'all can hold me accountable and if anyone wants to join in, feel free!
[Goal] Body fat percentages
/u/notyourtoy [5'8" | 126 lbs | 18.95 BMI | -36 lbs | F]
Created: Sat Oct 1 00:34:51 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55c55m/body_fat_percentages/
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I am currently ~5 lbs above my target weight: a 18.5 BMI.
Today I learned how to use the body fat scale at my gym, the type you hold with both hands while it takes a reading. It told me I'm at 14%.
None of my coworkers were surprised by this, but I was SHOCKED. I am nowhere near what I imagine a 14% bf should look like on a woman. A lot of sources put 14% near the bottom of a sustainable fat range for females and I look in the mirror and see a soft lumpy human as always, not the firm, muscly body that should go with that number.
Body dysmorphia is a bitch. I should be so happy right now, lower numbers are always better, but instead and I'm just distressed. I don't know what to think.
[Other] Got off track, but I'm ready to jump back into this full force :)
/u/chimichanga_mischief [5"4 | 155 | 27.1 | F]
Created: Fri Sep 30 23:59:42 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55c1ww/got_off_track_but_im_ready_to_jump_back_into_this/
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Lately I've definitely been letting things slip. I haven't been pushing myself to exercise as much. I've been eating more, and when I eat it's a lot more takeout food. I've just kind of given up and as a result I'm really unhappy with my body.
But tonight I did something that I shouldn't have. My friend logged onto her Facebook using my computer and forgot to log out. I was going to log out for her, but then I remembered that she's Facebook friends with my ex, and my ex and I aren't friends on Facebook (we dated for a year and broke up about a year ago). I know it's been a very long time, but the breakup is still something that still hugely affects me emotionally. So you can probably see where this is going... I accessed my ex's Facebook page using my friends account, and I looked at some of their private messages. I know it's a complete invasion of privacy and I feel bad about betraying my friend's trust like that... but it's also done something else. For a reason I can't exactly pinpoint, I feel more motivated in my restricting. Bringing up my ex and thinking about her again has renewed my desire to restrict and not eat and be thin. I am committed to my ED in the future and even though it is painful I'm glad I found such powerful thinspo.
[Help] How much weight is too much to lose in a week?
/u/OliveEyes- [5'5" | 146.8 | 25 | -4lbs | M]
Created: Fri Sep 30 23:23:41 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55bycw/how_much_weight_is_too_much_to_lose_in_a_week/
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[removed]
[Other] feeling good as of late
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Sep 30 22:23:52 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55bruv/feeling_good_as_of_late/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/6bbbee56098b454f9e92b9cdae9ce34d?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=e1bc2ce33526814c6171d525ff796bc2
[Rant/Rave] Stop acting superior and stop judging my ED (rant, will be all over the place)
/u/lightfeathers [5'4" | CW 112 | GW 95 | F]
Created: Fri Sep 30 21:52:36 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55bo5u/stop_acting_superior_and_stop_judging_my_ed_rant/
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This girl gets triggered when people mention preferring skinny people over chubby people. She once got triggered over me posting a picture of Lily-Rose Depp and saying that she was gorgeous. And she proceeded to tell me my views are fucked up and that she was too skinny. The picture of Lily-Rose was mostly just her face and shoulders.
I'm not denying it, I do have fucked up views. But what's wrong with having preferences? Why get mad about what people prefer?
Literally everything has to affect her. EVERYTHING. Everything has to relate to her in some way.
"You have depression? Me too, I cut. You take medication? Really? Same! I take a cocktail of pills, here's a picture of what I have to take every day. I want to die, let me joke about it all the time, joke about how I should just die rn. Am I fat? You think I'm fat, don't you? I'm literally obese to you, lightfeathers lol. I haven't eaten the whole day, I'm starving. Should I eat? Or maybe I'll just continue to starve. I barely eat enough as it is. Let me post this picture of food that's probably worth 800 cals or more. But I swear, I don't eat out a lot. It's rare, even though this is the 5th day in a row I've posted restaurant food. I'm overweight, I should just start starving myself, haha! Things don't go my way and you don't agree with how things should go? You're literally Hitler. You should go fuck yourself." - her in a fucking nutshell
I've started defending myself because I couldn't take it anymore and she even PMd a friend about how she's worried about me and it's depressing seeing me like this and that society is making me think I have to look a certain way and shit. No, society didn't do this to me. My brain did. The feeling of not deserving food did this, and the feeling of not deserving to be loved and to look pretty. The feeling of not being in control, of not looking the way I want to and not being perfect in my eyes did this. Just leave me the fuck alone. Because I'm not telling you what to do and I'm not telling you that your views are fucked or that you're vain and self obsessed. I'm not telling you that you're unhealthy and fat. Just fuck off and continue obsessing over how cute you think you are and if you're "thicc" or not. Jesus Christ.
Sorry, I needed to get that out. I've tried so hard to be understanding and nice to her. But I've reached my limit, I guess.
[Thinspo] Goodnight Thinspo. 💕
/u/BlackGirlSteeze
Created: Fri Sep 30 21:29:44 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55blg0/goodnight_thinspo/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/e2b78ef4689a4e8b9dc52613c24d002b?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=e633fd5a6459b4fe432034e6b2e518b1
[Rant/Rave] I swear, thinspo only works if i am looking at it the exact moment of weakness.
/u/cactuskey [5'0 | CW: 105lb | GW: 75lb | 26F]
Created: Fri Sep 30 21:20:39 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55bkde/i_swear_thinspo_only_works_if_i_am_looking_at_it/
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... which is always impossible because my weakest moments are when friends are offering me food. there's no way i could whip out my phone, scroll through a bunch of pics of what I want to be and then go "nah I'm good thanks" and have no one notice lmao uuuuuuuggggggghhhhhhhh
Where is my iron willpower when i actually need it?!
[Hand] My favorite hand picture I have!
/u/EmpireStateBitch [5'4" | CW 120 | GW 115 | UGW 100 | F]
Created: Fri Sep 30 20:38:51 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55bf7w/my_favorite_hand_picture_i_have/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/3f571691d00c413ba7c78c495c2d18e3?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=a7cb6999f21e28bb3aeab0e9fe295897
[Help] I fainted, I have no idea why this happened.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Sep 30 20:19:26 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55bcok/i_fainted_i_have_no_idea_why_this_happened/
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[deleted]
[Help] Question of the Day.
/u/BlackGirlSteeze
Created: Fri Sep 30 20:16:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55bca7/question_of_the_day/
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What is the most interesting thing about you?
Looking for an Ana coach
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Sep 30 19:48:53 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55b8qa/looking_for_an_ana_coach/
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[removed]
[Help] Satisfaction vs hunger
/u/caithaa [5'7|122|19|one day at a time 🌼]
Created: Fri Sep 30 19:39:56 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55b7k9/satisfaction_vs_hunger/
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Recently I've been eating as if my stomach is a black hole - it's never a full-on binge, but it gets kinda messy and my stomach hurts for hours afterwards.
Like today, I sat down for dinner, made myself:
* Whole-wheat tortilla (120cal), lite provolone (80cal), healthy ham (20 cal)
After that, I wasn't hungry. However, I didn't feel ~satisfied~. So I had more food.
* Baby carrots (about 25 medium ones, so approx 100cal) and classic hummus (4tbsp, 160cal).
Now I was at the point of explosion, YET I STILL WASN'T SATISFIED.
I had an entire freaking pint of lemon cake halo top (240cal) for lunch earlier, so it's not a sweet tooth. I'm not near my period. What the fuck is going on with me??
[Other] Today's numbers worked out wonderful. And on the upside, looks like during my week of "binging" I somehow miraculously dropped three pounds. Could it be possible upping my cals helped push this weight drop?
/u/TiredOfBeingFat_ [6'0"| CW251 |BMI34 | 22lost | GW130]
Created: Fri Sep 30 19:27:47 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55b5ye/todays_numbers_worked_out_wonderful_and_on_the/
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http://imgur.com/Gj3YNbf
[Other] Went grocery shopping and bought my safe foods, starting a 48 hour liquid fast to break in October.
/u/miss_morticia [5'10" | cw: 146 | gw: 105 | 20.90 | F]
Created: Fri Sep 30 19:26:17 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55b5r5/went_grocery_shopping_and_bought_my_safe_foods/
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Determined to make this month count!
Like I said in the title, starting a 48 hour liquid fast. :)
Let's make October an awesome month ladies and gentlemen! We got this!
[Rant/Rave] I'm such a hypocrite
/u/convincemeimhere [5'2" | CW 104.8 | 19.86% | GW 90]
Created: Fri Sep 30 18:55:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55b1n4/im_such_a_hypocrite/
---
So I'm afraid my ED has started influencing my SO's behavior and the sick part of me is delighted and the sane part of me is concerned.
He knows that I want to get back to my previous weight and was worried at first but I showed him my drivers license from when I was 90 lbs and he agreed I didn't look unhealthy at all.
Then he goes and looks up what his weight should be for his height and he tells me he should be around 150 lbs. He currently fluctuates between 170-180. I tell him 150 seems pretty low to me and he'd be a twig if he weighed that. I also tell him I've never believed he's only 5'10" because he seems so much taller. So we measure him and it turns out he's actually an inch shorter than that. So we look up healthy weight range and it's 135-165. And I'm a little stunned tbh because that seems really low.
A couple weeks ago we agreed we'd switch to a high-protein diet and start being more active. We're already pretty active people and he works a physically demanding job on his feet for 10+ hours a day.
Well this afternoon before work he tells me he drank this ephedrine drink when he got to work yesterday and he didn't have to drink his protein shake because he never got hungry. Then he tells me he's lost 3 lbs just this week. Well all morning he also had a terrible headache and here I am lecturing him about being careful with ephedrine when I do EC stacks all the time.
Part of me wants to stop fixating on my weight and restricting so much (openly anyways) because I'm ashamed I've seemingly been a bad influence. Then there's this other part of me that's elated and wants to drag him down this twisted path with me and that makes me feel like I'm a horrible fucking person that needs to get help.
[Help] So my breath smells like alcohol but I don't drink
/u/MeraxesPestis [5'2" | 241 lbs | 45.7 | -49 lbs | GQ]
Created: Fri Sep 30 18:53:53 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55b1fc/so_my_breath_smells_like_alcohol_but_i_dont_drink/
---
It's been the past few days, when I drink water I notice this horrible ethanol-like after taste, like I've swallowed nail polish remover. Tonight I've been tasting it (and I assume thus smelling like it) all the time.
I know that diabetic ketoacidosis can make your breath smell fruity or sweet and though I've never been diagnosed as diabetic, I'm still a large person and my father's diabetic so I've always been watchful for symptoms. I get my A1C and fasting glucose checked from time to time and they've always been okay, though.
Is this from fasting/restricting? Is it normal? Has this happened to anyone else (and for the love of all that is good and holy, how do you deal with it)? Google mentioned ketoacidosis can be life-threatening. Should I be concerned? I've been so excited with my weight loss so far and I don't want to stall it or slow it down but I also don't want to die... I've been figuring that the short term effects on my health from the current expression of my ED are less damaging than the long-term effects of my obesity & a 51% BMI, but I'm a little unnerved.
[Goal] Omg you guys, I finally have a thigh gap
/u/spiegel7 [5'10" | CW: 139 GW: 115 | 19.94 | -25 | F]
Created: Fri Sep 30 18:14:52 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55avwu/omg_you_guys_i_finally_have_a_thigh_gap/
---
http://imgur.com/mzNsmSC
[Rant/Rave] That moment when someone says "wow, you've lost weight since I last saw you! Are you starving yourself? Eat some food girl!"
/u/KajaIsForeverAlone [height:5'9 | CW: 147 BMI:21 | weight lost:15 lbs | Gender: F]
Created: Fri Sep 30 17:19:29 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55anv6/that_moment_when_someone_says_wow_youve_lost/
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https://www.reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55anv6/that_moment_when_someone_says_wow_youve_lost/
[Thinspo] Must try harder
/u/eightstone [Height: 5ft 7 | CW: 9st 12lbs| BMI: 21 | Gender: F]
Created: Fri Sep 30 16:51:34 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55ajqn/must_try_harder/
---
http://imgur.com/gallery/evktq
[Help] How do standard clothes sizes work?
/u/KajaIsForeverAlone [height:5'9 | CW: 147 BMI:21 | weight lost:15 lbs | Gender: F]
Created: Fri Sep 30 16:39:01 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55aht3/how_do_standard_clothes_sizes_work/
---
I don't understand the measurements for all the numbers (I've never really cared about clothes or their sizes before so I have no idea)
[Other] Someone noticed I've lost weight.
/u/pizzapie49 [5'3 | CW 113|| GW 105 | 20.5 | -7 | F]
Created: Fri Sep 30 15:55:27 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55aatq/someone_noticed_ive_lost_weight/
---
A friend noticed I've lost weight and told me I looked pretty. I was so happy I canceled the binge I had planned and went on a run instead! Even though I know the scale says I'm losing weight, sometimes I just don't believe it. Best thing I've heard all month!!
[Hand] My hand reminds me of a duck's foot
/u/everlastingethereal [5'5" | CW: 97 | 16.33 | F]
Created: Fri Sep 30 15:25:33 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55a63f/my_hand_reminds_me_of_a_ducks_foot/
---
http://imgur.com/a/RZS35
[Help] [question] good low cal sushi?
/u/thinkthinlythrowaway
Created: Fri Sep 30 14:52:25 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55a0k0/question_good_low_cal_sushi/
---
Hey friends!
My boyfriend and I are going out for sushi and I usually get what he gets but I never know the calorie count.
Does anyone know of good low cal sushi?
I like basically anything really so if you guys have suggestions I'm up for them.
I'm going to places that have all the basics
Nakato or Sakura. They're sorta chain places so maybe you know them? I can link the menus if you guys want...
Anyways thanks for your help!
[Rant/Rave] Well, my boyfriend just broke up with me and now I see no point in living
/u/Hiyoheyyo
Created: Fri Sep 30 14:42:15 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/559yuf/well_my_boyfriend_just_broke_up_with_me_and_now_i/
---
I feel worthless, I'm not going anywhere in life, all because of this stupid fucking disorder, I want to die, I don't want to be here anymore, I'm tired of all of this, I'm ruining everything so why do I deserve to fucking breath
[Help] C/s
/u/dudeswallow
Created: Fri Sep 30 14:33:13 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/559x9y/cs/
---
Where do i find resources to stop?
[Rant/Rave] fasting problems
/u/literallytoki [5'2in | 143lbs | 27% | -2lbs | NB]
Created: Fri Sep 30 14:24:19 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/559vq5/fasting_problems/
---
i finally got around to researching everything i could about fasting and planned to start today.
i made it 14 hours and then immediate hunger.
like, it hit me like a brick. i had no idea why. i decided, fine, 14 hours is good enough for my first go but maybe my body isnt ready for a longer time, so i ate a small piece of cheese and some crackers. drinking water like usual.
that holds me over until i start cramping like a bitch. I'm in a ton of pain and i immediately know, im on my period.... i chose to start fasting on the one day when i allow myself 1million calories.
well, i can tell you two things.
1. i will try fasting again later. it seems to work for me better than restriction, which is what i have been doing.
and
2. those 14 hours meant nothing because i have to eat enough food so my medicine doesnt murder my insides...
[Thinspo] Daily Thinspo. 💕
/u/BlackGirlSteeze
Created: Fri Sep 30 13:39:49 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/559o0s/daily_thinspo/
---
https://i.reddituploads.com/5361fdb5f52440f7a04fdbd2f173013a?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=f076cdbb0a17acd237cc453810088238
[Discussion] HALLOWEEN COSTUMES?
/u/throwaway03199519 [5'6 | CW 114 | GW 110| 18.47| -22| F]
Created: Fri Sep 30 13:34:01 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/559n0v/halloween_costumes/
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So I was gonna wait till tomorrow to post this because it's officially October first but I just can't wait. Do you guys know what you're gonna be for Halloween? Also, do you have goal weights set for Halloween? I've been in a bad binge and restrict cycle for awhile so I'm hoping to get control of that and lose my remaining five pounds before Halloween so I can comfortably fit into the XS Harley Quinn costume I ordered.
Does anyone have any ideas for more Halloween costumes? I want to have at least two because I go to college and there's gonna be four days straight of parties.
EDIT: preferably something cheap/home made for the second costume!
Also this is the costume I ordered! https://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/B0073E565A/ref=mp_s_a_1_10/152-2656204-0031514?ie=UTF8&qid=1475264360&sr=8-10&pi=AC_SX236_SY340_QL65&keywords=harley+quinn+costume
[Rant/Rave] Fasted for 8 days then failed hard today
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Sep 30 13:19:52 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/559kgo/fasted_for_8_days_then_failed_hard_today/
---
[deleted]
[Discussion] Does anyone else feel their ed has a huge impact on other aspects of life?
/u/Superderg
Created: Fri Sep 30 12:56:20 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/559g9w/does_anyone_else_feel_their_ed_has_a_huge_impact/
---
Like I was restricting for a few weeks and was so organized. My head felt clear, lots of energy, able to stay on top of everything! And then I binged. . Which turned into a 4 week plateau of maintaining. And suddenly my apartment is a mess, everything is out of control, I haven't done dishes in weeks or laundry. Like I don't know where the time has gone or how I let the place get so messy. I've been lethargic, just generally tired and lazy. Then I went from maintaining to gaining 2lbs and went nuts. Now I'm back to restricting and suddenly my house is clean. Like my kitchen is immaculate, I took 15 mins and my living room is spotless. So basically if I eat my house goes into a meltdown. Anyone else?
Discussion sorry can't flair on mobile!
[Discussion] What do you guys think of chewing and spitting?
/u/kafka__dreams
Created: Fri Sep 30 12:55:49 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/559g6h/what_do_you_guys_think_of_chewing_and_spitting/
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I think its wasteful but its nice because its helping me get over purging. Plus I can look into the bag i spit it all into and get the satisfaction that I got to taste it without it being in my stomach. Its like restricting but I dont feel as faint or deprived. But its gross too. What do you guys think?
[Help] Does anyone else have/had lanugo?
/u/concuidado [4'11 | 83 lbs | 17.8 | -62| F]
Created: Fri Sep 30 12:42:15 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/559dno/does_anyone_else_havehad_lanugo/
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I have it all over my stomach and I hate it! I am slowly upping my calories to maintain, will that make it go away?
Has anyone else dealing/dealt with it? How did you make it go away?
[Discussion] What's the difference between fasting and restricting very low?
/u/taeyeons-comrade [perpetual shame]
Created: Fri Sep 30 12:19:43 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5599ry/whats_the_difference_between_fasting_and/
---
I don't mean weight-loss wise, I mean does it have a different affect on the body if I eat 0 calories and just drink water versus fasting all day and eating a small snack for energy?
[Other] Arcade Fire – My Body is a Cage
/u/turtle4president [5'2" | 106.2 | 20.12 | F/20]
Created: Fri Sep 30 11:51:53 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55950e/arcade_fire_my_body_is_a_cage/
---
https://youtu.be/nhhZdune_5Q
[Discussion] Binging Meat as a Vegetarian
/u/venetianrosequartz [5'6"|CW 140|HW 153|LW 130|GW 135|UGW 112|WL -13| BMI 22.6|Female]
Created: Fri Sep 30 11:35:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55921v/binging_meat_as_a_vegetarian/
---
Do any other vegetarians get the huge impulse to stuff their face with meat? When I'm grabbing foods for a binge it takes all my self control and then some to grab potato chips and not my family's fried chicken.
I've been vegetarian for a year and I really don't want to do this to myself. Or to the animals either. I would almost (but not quite) compare it to self harm... Like it's the same feeling I get when I want to cut. I want to eat all the meat and more!!!! I'm really afraid I'll lose control and eat meat :(
Does anyone else struggle with this? I've never done it but I'm so scared..
[Hand] hand (and coffee) pics!
/u/lymfp [5'3" | BMI 21.66 | vegan | F]
Created: Fri Sep 30 11:33:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5591sy/hand_and_coffee_pics/
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https://imgur.com/a/H91jm
[Help] Work out suggestions?
/u/abraddon
Created: Fri Sep 30 11:15:55 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/558yib/work_out_suggestions/
---
On mobile so I can't flair, sorry.
So the other day I started doing squats, sit ups, and push ups. I like to work out while watching videos on my phone because I'm still doing something I like just being productive while doing so. It's been working really well and now every time I watch a video I get really motivated too. I'm not 100% sure that this is a balanced work out though so if you have any suggestions to help work other areas too, that'd be great!
[Goal] Just sent this in to a printing company to make me a diary so I can track my progress! So excited!
/u/DenyMyHunger [5'7"| Fat! | UGW:112| F]
Created: Fri Sep 30 11:15:01 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/558ybp/just_sent_this_in_to_a_printing_company_to_make/
---
http://imgur.com/yAUaL5n
[Rant/Rave] I just wanted a salad...
/u/EmpireStateBitch [5'4" | 122.4lbs | -6 | F]
Created: Fri Sep 30 11:02:14 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/558vya/i_just_wanted_a_salad/
---
I was going through the salad bar at work, and at the end they ask you about dressing. They don't do dressing on the side, so I always say I want a very little amount, and they give me even less than I ask for. It's been great.
Today though, when I asked for dressing, the guy proceeded to dump HALF THE BOTTLE into my salad. Now my calories are all in salad dressing and I can't have my afternoon snack later, and I'm just very grumpy about the whole thing.
Lesson learned: I feel so sick and fat right now. From now on, I'll get no dressing at all.
[Discussion] Anybody else know who Eugenia Cooney is?
/u/ikillsouls [5' 2" | 105 | 19.2 | -21 lb | f]
Created: Fri Sep 30 10:59:17 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/558veb/anybody_else_know_who_eugenia_cooney_is/
---
I started seeing her pop around a couple months ago and while her content isnt my cup of tea, of course my first disgusting thought was about how skinny she is. lately though she's become more popular because it almost looks like she's on the verge of dying. it's sickening seeing people tell her to "just eat" or calling her disgusting or calling her out, like all of that might cure her eating disorder. It's pretty sad to see her life be completely broadcasted out like that, even though her condition does look bad. i just feel really bad for her and hope that she does whatever makes her happy but i also really she turns out okay.
[Tip] Tip: no, you're not allowed to eat that shit just because "you've been starting yourself for so long"
/u/copofteashirt
Created: Fri Sep 30 10:39:18 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/558ru7/tip_no_youre_not_allowed_to_eat_that_shit_just/
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Think about why you want to eat that and whether you're going to regret it.
To me, it's easier to binge after I've been restricting since I'd start eating larger amounts of food and I'd justify it by saying that "I'm at a caloric deficit anyway, **tomorrow** I'll eat less/better" ... Then it creates a downward spiral.
Why should you wait for tomorrow? What's the difference?
I'll tell you: only an excuse to procrastinate to get immediate satisfaction and postpone the pain. But if you want to lose weight, it's not going to help you at all. And then you're going to "make up for it" - ending up hurting yourself more without any advantage..... Because that's what make sense to our ED, somehow.
*lmao this has become a rant about how I suck at restricting (looking at you, chocolate wraps)*
Edit: "starving" in the title
[Goal] I stopped in the middle of stocking up for a spontaneous binge. Omg <3
/u/smokesanddietcokes [Doesn't actually know what she's talking about.]
Created: Fri Sep 30 10:29:23 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/558q24/i_stopped_in_the_middle_of_stocking_up_for_a/
---
[Kinda carrying on from this post](https://www.reddit.com/r/proED/comments/556wgl/i_havnt_eaten_properly_since_my_last_lifting/)
So I had something to eat, got my butt to the gym.
It was a flop. I seriously may as well not have gone. I couldn't lift half of what I usually do, I was tired, and half an hour in I felt SO nauseous. Stopped, waited for it to pass, started lifting again.. yep, definitely felt like I was gonna throw up. I decided to back out then and there, grabbed my stuff and went home. I did *not* feel at all right.
I was really disappointed in myself for quitting, but I REALLY didn't want to throw up (especially not in front of the cute new PT that apparently is working there now, cough) and felt like if I pushed it, I was definitely going to feel worse and worse.
Now, a normal brain probably would have gone:
"*Well, lesson learned. Don't lift on Wednesday, not eat, and then attempt to lift on Friday. It doesn't work. Do it right next week*."
and moved on, right?
But instead, my troll brain does this (once the nausea had passed on my way walking home):
"*Well you are hungry and tired and need carbs. That's why you didn't lift, that's why it made you feel sick. Also protein. But mainly carbs. Perhaps sugar. You literally need all the carbs and protein and sugar right now. Some fat too. Go to the store. GO TO THE STORE SMOKES, AND BUY EVERYTHING. AND EAT IT. RIGHT NOW. THAT IS WHAT YOU NEED TO DO. ITS THE RIGHT THING. THAT WILL MAKE ALL OF THIS BETTER AND TOTALLY MASK THE DISAPPOINTMENT YOU HAVE IN YOURSELF FOR NOT DOING YOUR WORKOUT TODAY. CARBS!*"
I go to the store, grab the basket. Fill it with.. eurgh. Flapjack, a cake slice, almond yogurt, tuna melt wrap from their deli, eye up more flapjacks, some marshmellows, dessert pots... It was horrible. I didn't want to be doing it and I didn't want to be there. I'm sure many of us know that feeling.
But then I stopped and looked at all the food. **I never do that**. I never stop and think when I'm in 'binge mode'. I don't know why I did, it just happened. I actually asked myself *Will this make it better? Really? Wont it just make you feel worse? Why not just learn from it and do better next week?*.
I asked myself *Do you really want to be spending the little money you have to last you a week on all this binge food? Especially since you only have it because someone gave it to you? Will you waste their money on this food? Is that what you're gonna do?* (true story, someone - <3 <3 <3 - saved my butt with money for food cus I had run out for the next week).
I said to myself *Yes, you are really hungry right now, and maybe it's true that you failed today because you didn't eat right.. but wouldn't it be nice to go home, guilt free, and get your usual gym day foods instead? Sure you havn't had a workout, but it'll be better than doing this. Wouldn't you prefer to cook a nice meal? You love broccoli. Go in that direction.*.
And I put everything back. Every bit of it. Instead, I got a bag of broccoli, and some salad veg (to add to healthy things I already have in).
I have seriously never stopped myself before.
.. Ok there's no where else to go with this sorry but I just needed to tell you guys <3 <3 <3
(Okay fine I kept ONE marshmallow snack and ate it on the way home but it's only about 50kcal and it was 10p and I really like them! xD)
[Discussion] Daily Food Diary! September 30, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Fri Sep 30 10:02:33 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/558lfd/daily_food_diary_september_30_2016/
---
This is a daily food diary thread for September 30, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
[Goal] I Pooped In Front Of A Boat: Epilogue
/u/TinyTinyCleverCDR [156 cm | 52.5 kg | 22.45 | -6 kg | F]
Created: Fri Sep 30 09:02:21 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/558b1q/i_pooped_in_front_of_a_boat_epilogue/
---
You may or may not remember that some dude wouldn't let me use the bathroom while I was out jogging because I'd forgotten my wallet.
[GUESS WHO DIDN'T POOP OUTSIDE TODAY?](http://imgur.com/Fwg7DX8)
[Rant/Rave] Well Folks, I went and Did It
/u/mild-rose [5'11 | 143.8 |19.42 | not enough | f]
Created: Fri Sep 30 08:52:26 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5589f1/well_folks_i_went_and_did_it/
---
I don't know what's wrong with me. Every time I lose weight I feel this fucked up need to binge, I swear.
As I was leaving the house to go buy binge food, I looked in the mirror and told myself that it was a binge, I just needed to resist. Instead I went and bought a double peanut butter magnum, two kinder maxis, and two kinder buenos. And ate it all in under 10 minutes. My stomach is in fucking agony. I don't know if I can manage to eat anything tonight with people. I've told everyone my stomach hurts, and maybe I'll go purge to make it convincing and alleviate this. I'm supposed to go out for drinks tomorrow and I don't think I'll eat anything until then, and Sunday is Rosh Hashanah, so I'm cooking a big meal. Fuck me.
[Discussion] I love fasting.
/u/salamanderqueen [5'9"| CW: 149 | SW: 180 | GW: 120 | -31 | 19F]
Created: Fri Sep 30 08:35:11 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5586ht/i_love_fasting/
---
I love the feeling of not being controlled by food. Love the feeling of total emptiness. Love being able to struggle to remember the last time I ate. And I love feeling hungry.
[Help] What would you guys feel safe eating here? The nutrition stats are a little frustrating to access, probably because they don't want you to realize how unhealthy everything is. I really appreciate any help before I'm forced to eat here today 😓
/u/mermaid_puppy [5'11" | 137lb | UGW 115 | F]
Created: Fri Sep 30 08:34:52 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5586fn/what_would_you_guys_feel_safe_eating_here_the/
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http://m.fuzzystacoshop.com/fuzzys-taco-shop/menu/
[Help] TMI (poop related)
/u/tinybites [5'6" | sw: 185 | cw: 158.5 | gw: 115]
Created: Fri Sep 30 06:53:41 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/557r1w/tmi_poop_related/
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I haven't been able to poop for a week because of restricting and yesterday I was finally able to (thanks tea!) and now I can't stop. I'm in the bathroom like 3 times a day. This morning there was even a little bit of red blood after. I mean it's great because I'm finally losing again but is this normal?
[Discussion] Weekly Selfie, Progress Pic and OOTD Thread! September 30, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Fri Sep 30 06:03:11 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/557k7f/weekly_selfie_progress_pic_and_ootd_thread/
---
This is the weekly picture thread for September 30, 2016.
Feel free to share your selfies, progress pics or outfit-of-the-day (OOTD) pics in this thread!
**Rules**
1. Be nice, **or you will be banned.**
2. Please use [imgur](http://imgur.com/) as a host.
Consider adding commentary on featured brands, sizing, inspiration behind your OOTD (trying to look thin or cover up weightloss, etc.)!
**Remember that anyone can view the contents of this thread even if they are banned from this subreddit. If you receive unwanted messages, please contact the mods with a screenshot of the relevant messages. Note that even if we ban people, they can still message you, and they still have access to the contents of this subreddit. The best thing for you to do is to block them.**
*****
Selfie, progress pic and OOTD threads are posted every Friday.
Have any questions or concerns? Comment below, or [PM the mods.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FproED)
[Tip] A find, for those who do/want to do EC stacks
/u/morose_adipose [5'2 | 90lbs | 17.05% | F]
Created: Fri Sep 30 04:47:55 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/557bx0/a_find_for_those_who_dowant_to_do_ec_stacks/
---
I order a lot of supplements from this place, and I recently stumbled across
[this!](https://meridianbotanicals.com/index.php?main_page=product_info&products_id=848)
I think I will order this instead of going to the pharmacy for Bronkaid again, and see what the results are. They also sell Yohimbe, which is great for appetite control/energy but can be a bit potent if you are not used to it/take too much. I personally can't take it in a stack or my heartbeat gets all wonky and I puke.
Just thought I'd share. I'm a weirdo in the fact that I take all these natural supplements and vitamins and crap, and prefer natural treatments instead of pharmaceuticals, like I'm healthy or something lolol. Oh the irony. 😂
[Hand] Before the trend gets too annoying..,
/u/isolatedintrovert [155cm | CW: 46kg | GW: 41 | UGW: 38 | 19.93 | F]
Created: Fri Sep 30 03:18:35 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5573mz/before_the_trend_gets_too_annoying/
---
https://imgur.com/gallery/kvRrX
[Discussion] 168.5cm
/u/smallsmallersmallest [168cm | CW 50.9kg GW 46kg | 18.09 | -10.1kg | F]
Created: Fri Sep 30 02:54:01 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5571cd/1685cm/
---
I thought I was 168cm. That affects my bmi, I thought I'd been dipping in and out of underweight but mostly I've still been a healthy weight. It's only a cm and a half but ugh. Gonna have to reevaluate my goal weight, it was 46 or 47kg but I'm thinking 44 or 45.
EDIT: the title is meant to say 166.5cm. I'm clearly not used to writing that number haha.
[Help] o no
/u/Itsemurha [177cm|CW 67kg| GW: 55kg | SW:120kg |20.9| F]
Created: Fri Sep 30 02:48:59 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5570xk/o_no/
---
I binged and ate a whole box of [high fibre cereal](http://www.kelloggs.co.nz/en_NZ/special-k-advantage-product.html).
Pray 4 me
[Help] canadian problem
/u/gin-and-lemon [🐝 5'1"| cw: 155lbs | bmi: 30 | -7lbs | f ]
Created: Fri Sep 30 02:26:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/556z0u/canadian_problem/
---
OKAY so theres all these amazing low cal ice cream products in the states
what do we have here
do we have ANYTHING?
LIKE AT ALL?
PLEASE?
[Rant/Rave] I havn't eaten properly since my last lifting session and wow things hurt. I'm due back today.
/u/smokesanddietcokes [Doesn't actually know what she's talking about.]
Created: Fri Sep 30 01:56:42 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/556wgl/i_havnt_eaten_properly_since_my_last_lifting/
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Eurgh.
Okay, so I overate on Tuesday, about 2000kcal, which was around 500 over my TDEE. This was not good. Obviously.
My first gym day of the week was Wednesday. It was great. I didn't eat beforehand because of eating loads on Tuesday, and I wasn't hungry after (sometimes a really hard workout actually kills my hunger, I don't know why) so thought I'd make the most of it and restrict a bit. Had a plate of broccoli and mushrooms, but that was it.
Yesterday, Thursday, I really did plan to eat well. I swear. Anyone here who has seen my rambling posts know that usually I really do plan to eat well for my activities at the gym at *some* point at least, even if it's still not perfect. I get some protein down me at least. Infact - I planned to let myself make this week a TDEE week..
But then I kept thinking back to how I overate on Tuesday.. all those calories I need to 'make up' for. I didn't worry, mainly because I didn't think I'd be successful in restricting much anyway. But, welp, I was. Small jello pot, a salad, and a yogurt. A junk food yogurt too, not a proper one.
And damn, I've woken up today hurting all over, and I'm due at the gym again in about 6ish hours.
Usually I can tell between a 'good hurt' that wont affect working out, and a 'bad hurt' that means I should take it easy. But I can't tell today. I feel cold af but my muscles feel hot, somehow.. my tricep area in particular feels tight and painful.
I'll still go, obviously I'll eat before I go. Something in my brain is telling me to go a bit easier today just incase, but then if I go easier.. then I won't have earned or deserve the food I plan to eat maybe today or tomorrow. And I do really do plan to eat this time, at least tomorrow (I have to, my partners here tomorrow and he likes me to eat).
Why do I get myself into such pickles. Perhaps I should just not overthink.. as if that's possible.
I'm still not hungry tbqh.
[Thinspo] Korean model, iamchocobi
/u/verakitty [5'4"|CW 108lbs |18.5 |-12lbs |GW 105 |UGW 99 |F]
Created: Fri Sep 30 01:53:52 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/556w8j/korean_model_iamchocobi/
---
http://imgur.com/a/pIpxO
[Rant/Rave] kicked my plateau in bum!
/u/eightstone [Height: 5ft 7 | CW: 9st 12lbs| BMI: 21 | Gender: F]
Created: Fri Sep 30 01:30:10 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/556u19/kicked_my_plateau_in_bum/
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I've been plateauing at 9st 9lbs for daaaaaays, despite eating at a substantial deficit. Yesterday my weight actually went up by a lb. I felt like I was cracking up. Today I've dropped to 9st 7lbs. It's not loads, but it's 3lbs in the right direction. The relief is immense. Thanks u/smokesanddietcokes for reassuring me that the woosh would come. To anybody else stuck at a plateau: have faith in the deficit!
edit: missing a word from the title there
[Hand] my "spider" hands
/u/intlspacetrash [5'5" | 111 lbs | 18.69 | F]
Created: Fri Sep 30 00:29:53 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/556o0n/my_spider_hands/
---
http://i.imgur.com/7EIzhhM.jpg
[Hand] Imgur probably wonders why so many hands have been uploaded today.
/u/goldfoxxe [5'10 | 160 |23.7|F]
Created: Fri Sep 30 00:03:35 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/556lcn/imgur_probably_wonders_why_so_many_hands_have/
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http://imgur.com/a/kLWFD
[Tip] how to not binge idea!
/u/literallytoki [5'2in | 143lbs | 27% | -2lbs | NB]
Created: Thu Sep 29 23:47:02 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/556jix/how_to_not_binge_idea/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/2792546195bf4f8cb0ae7c1820d49a6e?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=f331a03de3a9d93740a974308b45f3ab
[Meme/Humor] [Heavy Breathing]
/u/Eyes_Couldnt_Lie
Created: Thu Sep 29 22:57:32 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/556e3y/heavy_breathing/
---
http://i.imgur.com/jc9jzLz.jpg
[Intro] Disappointed in myself.
/u/rizzle_riz [5'4' | SW:159| CW:149 | 25.75 | -10 | F]
Created: Thu Sep 29 22:32:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/556b6e/disappointed_in_myself/
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I've been lurking for quite a while now and thought I would make this my intro post.
Today I went to the fair with friends. I adjusted my calories the past week so I could eat comfortably around them when the time came. Unfortunately today started off rough for me and ended up throwing that plan to waste. In the morning I went to an advising appointment and was informed that I would not be accepted to the college of engineering at my university after spending 3 years working towards getting in. My whole college/career plans were thrown out the window and I had to pick an entirely different path. I'm extremely upset about it and broke down crying on the bus ride home. As soon as I got home I went to Wendy's and binged. That was okay because it fit exactly my calorie range and I figured I would walk some of it off at the fair. When it came time to the fair I kind of forgot about everything for the moment and actually had fun.
As we were getting ready to leave my friends suggested getting food. Having no self control, (and my friends insisting I try all these foods) I ended up binging again. As soon as I got home I went to my room and purged for the first time ever. I don't know how much I managed to get out but I'm comforted by the thought that I got some out. I never felt so desperate to just empty my stomach. Although this day has been one huge disappointment I can't help but feel proud of successfully purging. Now i'm realizing why people say it becomes addicting.
[Discussion] What weird things do you tell yourself?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Sep 29 22:28:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/556aqv/what_weird_things_do_you_tell_yourself/
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I love the outdoors, but I'm a college student so I spend most of my time in classes or the library. When it's nice out and I get hungry I always think if I'm going to take time away from school I'd rather get outside than eat. So I go for a walk instead to not be "wasteful" of my "free" time.
I also look up articles on the internet about how fasting is good for your brain and stuff so I can feel healthy.
I think I'm an unusual person with ED in that I'm not motivated by self hatred or a desire to punish myself or anything like that. In fact that kind of thought process makes eating taboo and then I want to do it more and I binge. So my "strategy" is basically just distracting myself from food and telling myself that I don't like it or need it or I'm better off without it. I distance myself from it so it's just like an object to me. I don't get excited about it but I'm also not afraid of it by any means. I'm just kind of indifferent to it and it gives me that "I'm in control" high which I think all of us get.
Anyone else have weird thought patterns like this?
Written thoughts
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Sep 29 22:09:27 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5568dj/written_thoughts/
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[deleted]
[Help] Caffeine overdose?
/u/Para-Medic [5'1' | too much | too much |0 | F]
Created: Thu Sep 29 22:00:42 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55676d/caffeine_overdose/
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I've never been a purger, but today I broke my fast, as you know if you read my previous post. I took a caffeine pill and 2 Primatene around 3pm. I broke my fast and ate a bit at 6pm. I had a Monster at around 8 and now at around 10pm, I am vomiting uncontrollably. I saw each portion I ate come up in perfect order. I am pretty sure I had way too much caffeine and that made me sick. I am, of course, very happy I was able to get the majority of the food I ate out. I feel really ill and it's even worse because I am at work, but I'm weirdly happy.
[Rant/Rave] [Rant] I fucking hate it when people tell me I'm skinny
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Sep 29 21:47:02 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5565hh/rant_i_fucking_hate_it_when_people_tell_me_im/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] Failing again and again and I'm fucking sick of it
/u/Space-Punk [5'11" | -31lbs | 20M]
Created: Thu Sep 29 21:41:29 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5564rp/failing_again_and_again_and_im_fucking_sick_of_it/
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This week has been the WORST week I have experienced thus far. I'm kicking myself in the face over it. For three days now I've been over my calorie limit by thousands. On Sunday I had to go out with my mother and we stopped for food. I tried so hard to be strong but I failed, and failure for me isn't just "Oops I ate a dollar burger" it's "Let's eat this huge chicken sandwich slathered in mayo, loaded french fries, and a huge ass shake".
I fasted on Monday to make up for it. On Tuesday I stayed well under my personal calorie limit. I was actually starting to get a grip again, I felt a little better. The number on my scale was still going down so I knew that I didn’t ruin anything. Surely I was fine!
Then on Wednesday my mother wanted to go out again. Red Lobster of all places because they had all you could eat shrimp. So I didn't eat anything all day and went onto their website to calculate the calories for what I would order. Sure I would be eating shrimp drowned in butter, but at least I could stay under my limit!
But of fucking course, I forgot the list of what I planned on ordering and the items I had calculated online weren't even on the menu. I couldn't keep track of anything and was having anxiety over the whole situation. For me, anxiety means binging. When I was home and could Google all the calories it came out to around 2600. I wanted to die.
So today I decided to fast and make up for it. I was going strong and feeling pretty good about myself. Weighing myself this morning showed that I was down another pound, so I was hoping my fuck ups wouldn't matter. That was until my mother came home and reminded me that we had leftovers from our outing. In the end, I ate over 2000 calories again and I'm ready to throw my face into a brick wall.
Why have I suddenly lost my self-control? I've been doing so well, and now I feel bloated and disgusting. Where do I even go from here?
The only ray of light in my life right now is that all the gross leftovers have been removed from this house. Now I can go back to my watermelon, jello cups, and salad in peace. Although I may try to fast again tomorrow.
I've been losing pounds but not inches, and it's really concerning. Who cares what the damn scale says if my body refuses to shrink?
I don't know. I'm just feeling really fucked over right now.
[Hand] Hand and hello intro:)
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Sep 29 21:12:44 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5560x6/hand_and_hello_intro/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/9aead21750e64b4ba02a652d2ff690e0?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=3999e999530fb4d529bcbe1a50c342a7
[Hand] New trend? Not as flattering for a short girl..
/u/isurvivedthetruck
Created: Thu Sep 29 21:12:06 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5560ui/new_trend_not_as_flattering_for_a_short_girl/
---
http://i.imgur.com/5JYMRsX.jpg
[Hand] Jumping in on the hand trend!
/u/Casablanca_Insomnia [5'3 | 102 | 18.63 | -21 | F]
Created: Thu Sep 29 20:47:17 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/555xdi/jumping_in_on_the_hand_trend/
---
http://imgur.com/a/tW2Rs
[Help] (Tmi warning!) Painful bloating after restricting please help
/u/citrus_cunt [5' 9"| 139lbs | 19.5| +2lbs | F]
Created: Thu Sep 29 20:43:28 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/555wry/tmi_warning_painful_bloating_after_restricting/
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So I've been restricting under 600kcal everyday this week, so naturally I haven't taken a shit in a while. So I ate 3 digestive biscuits and a veggie wrap with black beans hoping for the best.
I stg my stomach is bubbling so much you can hear and see it I am in soooo much pain!! Even worse, I'm stuck in a public bathroom and I'm expected to be back at an event I'm a part of!! Aaaa!!
I need this stuff out of my system, and fast. It hurts so bad!!!
[Rant/Rave] My failure is going to be over.
/u/Im_A_Whale_AMA [5'3.5" | 103.8 lbs | 18.53 | ¯\_(ツ)_/¯]
Created: Thu Sep 29 20:38:32 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/555w38/my_failure_is_going_to_be_over/
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I've never been _good_ at restricting.
I always go restrict --> binge --> restrict --> binge, and for a while, I was still loosing at a decent pace.
But recently I've gotten worse, and my binging is just so bad (~5000 calories minimum per day), at least for me.
So I'm setting a new goal. I'm going to do whatever it takes to stay away from food.
Here's a rough week estimate.
Monday - 1000
Tuesday - 900
Wednesday - 800
Thursday - 500
Friday - 500
Saturday - 1200
Sunday - 1100
Those are my MAXIMUMS. I'm going to try to stay 300-500 every day.
So yeah :) October will be a brand new month!
Artificial sweeteners and bloating
/u/EmpireStateBitch [5'4" | 122.4lbs | -6 | F]
Created: Thu Sep 29 19:46:51 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/555ohi/artificial_sweeteners_and_bloating/
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Do any of you ever get bloated and just feel sick when you have too much artificial sweetener? I always rely on sugar free gum and Coke zero to get me through the day but I think it's making me really bloated. Any other alternatives??
[Rant/Rave] My biggest trigger is my SO
/u/pinotblanc [5'3 | GW:115 | 24.8 | -11 | F]
Created: Thu Sep 29 19:20:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/555kmz/my_biggest_trigger_is_my_so/
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He can be such an asshole. When we fight all i want to do is stuff my face in a burger and fries and pizza and ice cream and chocolate and then everything else I can find. Currently drinking wine ugh. We don't fight often which is why I'm so affected when we do. Sometimes I wonder if I'm so testy because I have been eating so much less?
How do y'all deal with relationship troubles?
[Hand] This is a hand.
/u/letmebedefamed [6'2 | 144.8 | 17.39 | M]
Created: Thu Sep 29 19:20:27 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/555kki/this_is_a_hand/
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http://i.imgur.com/TUD15hT.jpg
PSA Guys I'm drunk and I'm gonna eat this burger
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Sep 29 19:19:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/555ki0/psa_guys_im_drunk_and_im_gonna_eat_this_burger/
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[deleted]
I don't deserve to love someone
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Sep 29 19:12:30 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/555jeo/i_dont_deserve_to_love_someone/
---
[deleted]
[Help] Caffeine content in a large 2 liter diet cola?
/u/CharChar12 [5' 9.5 |140lbs|21| Male]
Created: Thu Sep 29 18:48:23 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/555fu1/caffeine_content_in_a_large_2_liter_diet_cola/
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Because I just finished one and I dont want to become a freaky caffeinated mess. :( I also drank an energy drink... will I die?
[Thinspo] Daily Thinspo. 💕
/u/BlackGirlSteeze
Created: Thu Sep 29 18:44:38 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/555f9m/daily_thinspo/
---
https://i.reddituploads.com/cbd0b077af0349579b5cb6817e8f6649?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=ce857ed7389adca164eb2eca56063916
[Rant/Rave] Never felt more disgusting :(
/u/Shelbolovesnate [5'2" | 100 | 18.95 | 35 | F]
Created: Thu Sep 29 18:28:20 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/555cz5/never_felt_more_disgusting/
---
So I was in the middle of a purge sesh taking care of the dinner I ate, and my bf had to pee. My bathroom door doesn't lock and he apparently couldn't wait so he just came on in.
He knows I do it and says it shouldn't matter because he's seen it before, but I'm sort of having a meltdown and bawling my eyes out, and I heard him sigh and say "Jesus" because he thinks it shouldn't be a big deal to me if it isn't to him.
But guys, the amount of shame and embarrassment I'm feeling is unreal. There's no way it's not disgusting to him and I don't care how close we are, I'd rather he didn't see it if it can be avoided.
I just wish I could make him understand, but I can tell by the tone of his voice that he thinks I'm overreacting. I can't go 30 seconds without thinking about it and crying again. 😭
[Other] I binged and for the first time ever...purged. (LONG)
/u/DenyMyHunger [5'7"| Fat! | UGW:112| F]
Created: Thu Sep 29 18:25:39 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/555ckl/i_binged_and_for_the_first_time_everpurged_long/
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I don't know how to feel about this.
I've been sticking to 800 calories for over a week now and was planning on doing so (with maybe 2 or 3 higher days) until the end of October for my birthday then back again until Christmas. I've been getting by fantastically on 800 calories. I've been resisting temptation. My boyfriend had a big greasy dinner from the tandoori the other night and I had soup while he ate it. I was doing well. Until tonight.
He left some of his leftovers in the fridge (I told him to get rid of them as soon as he was finished as he doesn't go back to food) and I ate it. This wasn't too bad, maybe 300 calories max bringing me to 1100. Fixable. BUT NO. I then proceeded to eat five, that's right, FIVE bags of crisps (chips) and eight squares of dark chocolate!! I couldn't believe it. I sat after it and looked at all the empty packets and logged them all into MFP. I felt so fucking ashamed.
I then googled how to throw up and after reading up for a couple of minutes I went and threw up for 20 minutes. It was weird seeing and tasting all the different foods I had stuffed my fat face with. I felt so much better after it, like a weight (lol) had been lifted. I know all the calories won't be gone and I will still have absorbed some but thank god I got most of them out of me.
I don't know where I'm going with this....I just wanted to share with people who understand
<3
[Other] A surprise find in Grandma's basement
/u/convincemeimhere [5'2" | CW 106.2 | 20.12% | GW 90 | -6.8 lbs]
Created: Thu Sep 29 18:03:14 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55596r/a_surprise_find_in_grandmas_basement/
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I haven't been posting much lately because I've been in the middle of a move. Over this past week, we've been settling into our new place, which happens to be my grandparents house.
My grandparents have this huge house they had built 35+ years ago and they literally never get rid of anything. A lot of our stuff is being stored in the basement and I sent my SO down there earlier today to grab something and he comes back upstairs with these drink mix packets he found.
They are ephedrine drink packets. He's excited and throws a couple in his backpack to take to work and then gives one to me. Tells me there are boxes and boxes of them in the basement. Sure enough, there are several boxes with probably 200+ packets each.
Now I know my mom and grandma used ephedrine routinely throughout the early 90s as a weight loss supplement and I'm assuming my grandma probably bought all those boxes right before it became illegal as a diet supplement in the US.
I use EC stacks regularly and am really tempted to start using these instead. Is anyone here familiar with taking ephedrine vs. ephedra? I told my SO to be careful because he's prone to panic attacks and I'm concerned him using ephedrine could cause one.
I'm also curious if ephedrine has any sort of shelf life. Does the effect wear off if the product is really old? Either way, it's an interesting find and I'm really curious about trying them out.
[Front of packet](http://imgur.com/ZeDH1Xv)
[Back of packet](http://imgur.com/uJoWjLX)
[Hand] Is the hand thing annoying yet?
/u/thinsignificant [6'0|142lbs|18.51|-32lbs| F]
Created: Thu Sep 29 17:58:17 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5558fw/is_the_hand_thing_annoying_yet/
---
http://i.imgur.com/zZcNznH.jpg
[Discussion] Does anyone else love Metamucil?
/u/Wildrumpus27317
Created: Thu Sep 29 17:37:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55556s/does_anyone_else_love_metamucil/
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The regular stuff is only 25 cals per scoop and it keeps you so full (and does other stuff...)
[Hand] so this hand thing is a trend now? Might as well jump on the bandwagon!
/u/skinnydudeee [5'8" | CW: Trying to maintain 110lbs | SW: 180lbs | M]
Created: Thu Sep 29 17:33:39 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5554mr/so_this_hand_thing_is_a_trend_now_might_as_well/
---
https://i.redd.it/qn4djrqmxjox.jpg
[Rant/Rave] Gained back everything I lost during restriction/fasting
/u/Para-Medic [5'1' | too much | too much |0 | F]
Created: Thu Sep 29 17:20:15 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5552ju/gained_back_everything_i_lost_during/
---
This month was good. I was good. Now, It makes me so depressed how quickly all the weight comes back after restricting. I'm nowhere near thin so it makes it a million times worse. I want to blame it on my period. I am usually starving for chocolate and puffy as hell during that week. But I haven't gotten a period this month. I'm absurdly proud of that. It means I did something right. I ate a small plate and a cookie my daughter made for me and it totaled almost 1800 calories after making it 36 hours fasting. I wasn't even hungry. I'm furious with myself. I'll do better. Buy more fruit and vegetables just in case I "need" to eat. More cigarettes, more ice, more diet soda. I have to regain control.
[Hand] Choo choo!
/u/throwaway0908123 [5'7 | 122.2 | 19.07 | -14.8 | F]
Created: Thu Sep 29 17:15:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5551uk/choo_choo/
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http://i.imgur.com/KlLGEuR.jpg
[Help] [Help] I need some advice getting back on track.
/u/terahcrow [5'4" |CW: 165 |GW:120 | 28.32 | -2 | F]
Created: Thu Sep 29 17:09:39 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5550ug/help_i_need_some_advice_getting_back_on_track/
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[removed]
[Goal] finally
/u/claixe [5'5 | 101 | 17.24 | -11 | F]
Created: Thu Sep 29 16:04:24 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/554q8d/finally/
---
http://imgur.com/8yHtS9B
[Intro] An Intro and an Exit
/u/VowelsAreHard
Created: Thu Sep 29 15:58:37 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/554p7x/an_intro_and_an_exit/
---
I have really appreciated this community, even if I never really participated. Thank you all.
That said, I am not really in a good place right now, so I am bowing out; I had offered to be here to several people on this subreddit, but I am no longer capable of being any use to anyone, and for that, I am truly sorry.
Please don't concern yourself with me; I wish you all the best. <3
[Help] Everything is just fucked
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Sep 29 15:34:24 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/554l7m/everything_is_just_fucked/
---
[deleted]
[Intro] Figured I'd finally do a proper intro :)
/u/Casablanca_Insomnia [5'3 | 102 | 18.63 | -21 | F]
Created: Thu Sep 29 15:26:15 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/554jtu/figured_id_finally_do_a_proper_intro/
---
Warning - Wall of beautiful babbing text.
Need to start off saying that this sub has been wonderful for me. It's been amazing being able to vent, and also just lurk, knowing that other people are going through something very similar to what I am. You guys are all so supportive and lovely. Ok now my sappy mindvomit is over.
A little about me. I'm a student, have studied law, psychology and graphic design, and I still haven't worked out what I want to do with my life. My student loan is immense haha. I love writing, drawing and photography.
My eating disorder started when I was twelve. Bulimia. Which means that for most of my life I've been on the tubby side. As I've gotten older though it appears to have morphed into Anorexia Binge/Purge. Have been hospitalised, my lowest bmi ever was in the 13's which was really scary. I have been to therapy a few times but it has done absolutely nothing for me, not ready to recover I suppose. Last year I had a very supportive SO that helped me reach a normal weight via lifting and eating proper food. However now I am by living by myself again and am slipping back into my old habits.
TLDR - You guys are great and I love having people to relate to.
[Hand] Pearl rings and tan things
/u/verakitty [5'4"|CW 108lbs |18.5 |-12lbs |GW 105 |UGW 99 |F]
Created: Thu Sep 29 15:16:56 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/554i8k/pearl_rings_and_tan_things/
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http://i.imgur.com/Jcab8pN.jpg
When u know ur stubby small fingers will never be long and slender but u gotta keep it together
/u/bloodketosexmagic
Created: Thu Sep 29 15:12:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/554hk1/when_u_know_ur_stubby_small_fingers_will_never_be/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/b8bb567706e2427fac1a4d2e37104af5?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=e373175dc338fb5154247bc2007596dc
[Meme/Humor] YAAAAAAS THERE'S A HAND FLAIR!!
/u/Melusedek [173 | CW: 57.5 | GW ?? | 19.21/18.99 | F]
Created: Thu Sep 29 14:11:17 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55469v/yaaaaaas_theres_a_hand_flair/
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I'm stupidly happy that this is a thing right now. That is all.
[Rant/Rave] do you want pizza ?
/u/knobbje
Created: Thu Sep 29 13:39:31 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5540g4/do_you_want_pizza/
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[removed]
[Hand] Hand Picture with Landscape 🌷
/u/Water-coffee-tea [5'9.75" | CW:120.2 lbs. | BMI:16.97 | F]
Created: Thu Sep 29 13:38:53 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5540d3/hand_picture_with_landscape/
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Honestly my wrists and hands make me feel safe. They stay constant through all sorts of weight fluctuations. Same with my ankles and feet. 💜
http://imgur.com/Qq2ZJmw
http://imgur.com/MdD2LVD
Ninja edit to add the actual pictures. 😅
[Goal] RE: Updating my flair after so long
/u/goddamnroommate [5'6" | 143.8 | 23.30 | -50ish | F]
Created: Thu Sep 29 13:31:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/553z3d/re_updating_my_flair_after_so_long/
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I've been battling trying to keep my weight down vs uncontrollable three day binges and have very very slowly been gaining weight. It's beyond infuriating. But I'm using this reset as a reset to my reality. No, I'm no longer "hovering around 140". I'm hovering around 145 and that's depressing. But I'm back and I'm going to bust my butt. I'm recommitting. (also i'm fewer than 10lbs away from the upper limit of healthy and that's fucking terrifying)
[Discussion] What are your October goals?
/u/itsybitsyelephant [5'2 | CW 118 | GW 105]
Created: Thu Sep 29 13:28:28 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/553yha/what_are_your_october_goals/
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My October goals are to get down to 115 lbs, eat less 500 calories or less a day, finish applying for college, apply for all my internships, and generally become more organized!
What about you?
[Meme/Humor] surefire way to kill appetite
/u/tallgirlthrowaway13 [72.5" | 178 | 22.8 | 12 | F]
Created: Thu Sep 29 13:21:24 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/553x5z/surefire_way_to_kill_appetite/
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watch zit popping videos. think i'll stay at my 500 cals for today.
[Hand] My hands are the only thing about me I sort of like, so here ya go. Does anyone else have hair on their fingers or am I just a freak?
/u/wearebulletproof [5'4 | fat | 20F🎀✨]
Created: Thu Sep 29 13:07:35 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/553uia/my_hands_are_the_only_thing_about_me_i_sort_of/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/48c27487293448a1b011b2913f16b559?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=eed9d2373da95ebce00d462d8a32ce35
[Goal] I *almost* purged today but I didn't because of you guys! ❤️
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Sep 29 12:21:20 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/553loc/i_almost_purged_today_but_i_didnt_because_of_you/
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[deleted]
[Help] Advice for a gym newbie?
/u/caseydoeswords [5'0 | CW: 143.7 | GW: 120 | F]
Created: Thu Sep 29 12:11:07 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/553jsd/advice_for_a_gym_newbie/
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So I'm halfway to my goal weight and I'm stalling bad... I think it's time to join a gym and ramp up my calorie burning. I'm super inexperienced and have a few questions.
What do you guys eat before/after a workout? I hate how hungry it makes me and I don't want to feel famished after a workout, but I also want to stay as low cal as possible.
What are some good starter workouts that tone, but don't bulk? I want to be super lean and slim... not muscular. I don't even know where to begin with this.
If you go to the gym before work, what are some must-have items for the gym bag? I'll have to shower and get ready for work afterwards, I'm planning to go super early when it's mostly empty.
Any other tips or advice would be great too! I don't even know what to do with myself. Haha.
[Rant/Rave] I feel like I'm constantly being judged. I feel paranoid and like I want to crawl out of my skin.
/u/AllHailTheGremlins [5'7" | 156 lbs | 24.35 | F 21yo]
Created: Thu Sep 29 12:10:26 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/553jol/i_feel_like_im_constantly_being_judged_i_feel/
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I have a horrible relationship with food. I go on cycles where I binge for months, gain like 30 pounds, then go crazy and restrict and lose it all. But I never look better because then I lose control and go on a binge again. So I'm never really losing weight, just gaining and losing the same 30 pounds over and over and over.
I'm just off a binge cycle now. I'm ashamed of myself for my weight. Hideously ashamed. I haven't eaten in two days (besides two 29 cal cups of coffee and an 80 cal slice of cheese). I feel like everyone is looking at me, even though I know realistically no one gives a flying fuck.
I can't stand getting dressed in the morning. I feel okay when I leave the house, but by time my day is over I've become so self conscious that I just want to go home and hide. I can't stand seeing people I know on the street. I feel horrified and want to run the other way.
I was at lunch with a friend today (buffet style dinning hall) and I was so hungry but all I could think about was how fat I would look going up to get something to eat and how people would see me go by with a plate of food and think, " well obviously she's eating that, shes a fucking fat ass."
So I didn't eat. I left. I'm hiding in the corner of a classroom building typing this now. I just want to go home.
[Rant/Rave] everyone in my family is on a fucking diet and im constantly triggered and suffocating
/u/bloodketosexmagic
Created: Thu Sep 29 11:50:18 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/553fxr/everyone_in_my_family_is_on_a_fucking_diet_and_im/
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My brother and mother are on a keto diet for the first time ever and naturally wont shut the fuck up about it and food in general now. Especially my mum. I resent her terribly for a a lot of reasons and is the only one i haven't told about my ED, but my God can you go two hours without GOING ON AND ON AND ON AND ON ABOUT FOOD AND CALORIES AND DIETS AND BEING SOOOOO "STARVING"
Its my birthday this weekend and i told them to forget about a cake since they're so diet conscious
/rant
[Rant/Rave] When you're sorry you asked and now you have to pretend like you don't want to throw yourself into the sun
/u/mild-rose [5'11 | 143.8 |19.42 | not enough | f]
Created: Thu Sep 29 11:48:25 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/553fln/when_youre_sorry_you_asked_and_now_you_have_to/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/feb18f42ee4d498abb447a7b91eb4576?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=cafe8aac92054eca435840a5d68d0d79
[Hand] Joining this as well (so late though lol). I bite my nail so those were cropped out 🙃
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Sep 29 11:19:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/553a0s/joining_this_as_well_so_late_though_lol_i_bite_my/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/54818fa58f374fd4ac61fa0f6b38823d?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=212e4a4e6407623bcb90dd4b4e8b465f
[Help] Low calorie Thai options?
/u/thisthingagain [5'3 | 133.2| 23.6 | 10 | F]
Created: Thu Sep 29 11:17:36 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5539q2/low_calorie_thai_options/
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I'm going to lunch with my husband today (yay for dates! boo for noodles!) and I'm planing on ordering shrimp tom kha soup. Online it looks like it's less than 400 typically, so I'll be counting it at 400 to be safe. The only other low calorie option I can think of on their menu is the garlic chicken stir fry with no rice, which would be 380. For 20 more calories, I'd rather have the soup, you know? They do not have shirataki noodles in any of their dishes :(
If y'all know of any other options, I'd love to know! The guilt of eating many calories in one sitting is strong. I maxed at less than 500 yesterday, and I'm budgeting this as my only meal today. But it's a bit nerve wracking, as I ate 6 small meals yesterday.
Thanks!
PS: anyone have a memory-wiper on hand? Thai tea is mana from the Gods, and it's going to be hellish not giving in and blowing my whole day. Wish me luck!
[Help] [question] good stir fry recipes
/u/thinkthinlythrowaway
Created: Thu Sep 29 11:09:30 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55389t/question_good_stir_fry_recipes/
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I'm making dinner for tonight and I'm doing stir fry and my boyfriend will help but he never measures anything the fuck out and so I was wondering if any of you have a good stir fry mostly sauce recipe that way I can be like "babe lets follow this (totally not so I can count calories or anything lol)" and not freak the duck out the rest of the night
Thank you all you are beautiful!
[Rant/Rave] Bittersweet frustrations (rant)
/u/kibi_kibi [5'6" | 146 | 23.6 | GW 127 | F]
Created: Thu Sep 29 11:06:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5537q7/bittersweet_frustrations_rant/
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This year I moved to a new place where obesity is much more common than where I'm from. I gained a little weight (about 5 lbs) but that has since stabilized and I'm working on losing now. Problem is that all of my friends are heavier than me and constantly make comments on me being "slim" or "skinny"- which just isn't true. I'm average sized but everyone here is fat so I'm seen as thin. They all talk about wanting to lose weight but when I chip in I "don't have any fat to lose". I'm concerned what they will say if I actually make my way towards my GW. (I say "if", I should say "when"! self-assurance is hard). It doesn't even feel validating to hear this stuff because I know it to be untrue. I'm closer to my HW than my LW by a lot. I would hardly, if ever, get comments like this at home. I'm going back in 6 months and I don't want the standards here to mess with my goal to be skinny when I go home.
Side rant: one of my friends suggested I get the "one size" leggings in her store instead of the "tall and curvy". But the One Sizes are short on me and already have a hole in the crotch because ,apparently, my thighs are too fat for them. It's like people here think I'm thinner than I am. I'm putting away the leggings until I lose 10lbs. (I took "before" photos as well).
Anyway, not sure if anyone has similar experiences. Standards can be so different from place to place. I know I would be considered borderline obese in so-Cal. It's just a little nice to be the thin friend here for once.
Y'all are beautiful xoxo
[Goal] Her wrists are goals... R.I.P. Miss Winehouse
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Sep 29 11:02:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55370t/her_wrists_are_goals_rip_miss_winehouse/
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http://imgur.com/gallery/Thmqz
[Hand] Late nights holding bae's hand
/u/Melusedek [173 | CW: 57.5 | GW ?? | 19.21/18.99 | F]
Created: Thu Sep 29 10:39:47 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5532pm/late_nights_holding_baes_hand/
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http://imgur.com/a/AQToj
[Other] Holding bae's hand <3
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Sep 29 10:30:39 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5530xa/holding_baes_hand_3/
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http://imgur.com/a/5hejf
[Hand] just jumping on the hand hype train... sorry for that ugly nail polish btw..
/u/knobbje
Created: Thu Sep 29 10:29:17 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5530n8/just_jumping_on_the_hand_hype_train_sorry_for/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/535e2315198344b780117ebb463d7973?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=63e7e77358e0c20a86415adbb769730f
[Meme/Humor] Everyone on this subreddit rn (I'm loving this hand thing we've got going on xD)
/u/smokesanddietcokes [Doesn't actually know what she's talking about.]
Created: Thu Sep 29 10:07:02 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/552wiy/everyone_on_this_subreddit_rn_im_loving_this_hand/
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https://m.popkey.co/de30bc/464zw.gif
[Hand] Joining the HAND TRAIN! 🚂
/u/mermaid_puppy [5'11" | 137lb | UGW 115 | F]
Created: Thu Sep 29 10:05:36 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/552w95/joining_the_hand_train/
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http://i.imgur.com/cagrGyy.jpg
[Discussion] Daily Food Diary! September 29, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Thu Sep 29 10:02:24 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/552vnq/daily_food_diary_september_29_2016/
---
This is a daily food diary thread for September 29, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
[Rant/Rave] Gained so much weight that everyone's noticed
/u/drunkenphilosophy [160 cm (5'3") | 45.4 kg (101 lbs) | binged 23 May - 7 July]
Created: Thu Sep 29 09:50:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/552tk6/gained_so_much_weight_that_everyones_noticed/
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I've been bingeing for four months straight and it's led to a 10 pound gain, from 42kg to 46kg at 5'2". I can't fit into my jeans any more. My arms are flabbier than ever. I've stopped running and I lost all my stamina.
To make things worse I've tried to control the bingeing by restricting, which is what my family sees. Everyone around me has noticed my changed eating habits. I'm known as the girl who doesn't eat now. They don't see me bingeing in private. So I don't eat, but I'm fat anyway. There goes my image as naturally skinny.
Today a relative saw me and went, oh my god, you've gained so much weight! You look good! I can tell because your thighs are so much meatier now.
It kills me on the inside and I hate myself so much. What's even worse is that immediately after that I hated myself so much I binged again.
I need to be that naturally skinny girl again. I need to be the girl who eats a lot but still stays skinny. Fuck this. New rule: I'm not allowed to eat at all, no matter how hungry I am, if nobody is looking. Right now, I'm so afraid of food, the thought of it is like eating insects.
Time to reclaim control. Fatness is for losers who can't get a grip. ProED, this bitch is back in business.
[Discussion] Mod-mail received this message. I'd love to know the community's response
/u/Noroeste [5'6 | can fit in a rowboat | F]
Created: Thu Sep 29 09:36:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/552r3f/modmail_received_this_message_id_love_to_know_the/
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> Came across this subreddit after scrolling through another member's ([username omitted]) activity. I've read comments asking for advice on how to go 50+ hours without eating and seen members posting "thinspo" pictures featuring jutting bones as if they are their gold medals. This is so unhealthy and dangerous. I know the rules say don't comment about healthy and so forth, but as someone who has suffered with anorexic and bulimia for years, I see these pictures as a doorway into a spiraling recurrence of ED. I know others will see those pictures and think "I wish I looked like that. I want to look like that" and spiral out of control. Not all body types are the same so 120 lbs on one person is not the same as on someone else-meaning what one considers skinny is dangerously so on someone else. I'm writing this in an attempt to get this subreddit shut down as its so very dangerous especially with the amount of scrutiny already put on women and body image already.
[Other] (Bad) ED Poem, Felt Like Sharing.
/u/vhenah [5'7 | 139.2 | 21.73 | -81 | MOO]
Created: Thu Sep 29 08:24:44 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/552elf/bad_ed_poem_felt_like_sharing/
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Solace lies
Nestled in the vibrations of my stomach
Serenely slipping through each rib revealed
Slowly
Teasingly
Safety lies
Coiled around my neck
Carving the mantle of my collar
To emaciated prominence
Strength lies
In the withered tips
Of trembling fingers
Tendons taut and pointing
To an image of perfection
So tantalizingly close
So terrifyingly far
(It is all lies.)
[Tip] I bought a bunch of these and they taste like ass but claim to reduce body fat
/u/eightstone [Height: 5ft 7 | CW: 9st 12lbs| BMI: 21 | Gender: F]
Created: Thu Sep 29 08:05:30 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/552bew/i_bought_a_bunch_of_these_and_they_taste_like_ass/
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http://img.tesco.com/Groceries/pi/035/5060225570035/IDShot_540x540.jpg
[Help] Getting Sick and Wearing Down
/u/literallytoki [5'2in | 143lbs | 27% | -2lbs | NB]
Created: Thu Sep 29 07:37:14 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/55275f/getting_sick_and_wearing_down/
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So, I've got the flu. It's not that fun, since I work full-time and cannot call off... I really need the money.
I'm trying to stay awake on 800 calories and ginseng tea... It's not helping, I'm falling asleep at work and it's causing me more problems than it's doing me any good.
Does anyone have any suggestions?
Should I up my calories because I'm losing them because I'm sick?
What do you do?
Not sure if "Help" flair or "Discussion" flair would be better...
[Discussion] Weekly Emotional Support September 29, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Thu Sep 29 06:02:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/551te4/weekly_emotional_support_september_29_2016/
---
We're almost all dealing with quite stressful things outside of our eating disorders. Whether it be complicated relationships, friends, university, work or other mental illnesses like depression, anxiety or OCD, we all seem to be having a rougher time emotionally and mentally than the general population.
Use this thread to post about your problems or ask for advice concerning things other than EDs/ED behaviors.
**As always, follow the sub rules when reading or posting.**
*****
Weekly emotional well-being and support threads are posted every Thursday.
Have any questions or concerns? Comment below, or [PM the mods.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FproED)
[Help] Shots!
/u/Mattynebula
Created: Thu Sep 29 05:45:12 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/551rap/shots/
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My school is having a day to get shots for seniors before heading off to college. I turned in the form but turns out they're going to be weighing us and putting down our bmi. I'm 60 at 5'1 so my bmi is 11.3 which can send me straight to ip.
Here's my question, how can I quickly put on weight? what are some foods that will make me water retention of swell? It's today and i am so desperate. I'm really scared I know I'm sick but it's a problem for another day
[Discussion] Lunesta or Ambien makes you sleep eat.
/u/ohrissa [64" | 🐋🐋 | 28 | 3lbs | Ladyish]
Created: Thu Sep 29 04:36:23 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/551jva/lunesta_or_ambien_makes_you_sleep_eat/
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Anyone take Lunesta or Ambien for a sleep aid?
Those fuckers give me some wicked munchies, then I will pass out and wake up not remember ANYTHING until I find evidence of looks like a bunch of stoners broke into my kitchen.
Like, I'll pop a pill as soon as I get home (get those zzzz's in state before R2 of jobbyjob), I will get in my jam-jams and settle in with my premeasured out morning food look on internets and eat. I'll go back to put my dishes in the sink and BLAM!! derailed by cider doughnuts from the orchard. I'm not going to remember eating it tomorrow when I wake up, but the damage has been done. Anyone else have to deal with the battle of your well planned restrictive day eating being obliterated by a prescription.
[Thinspo] Thinspo in honour of those of us who are trying to break a plateau. Keep on <3
/u/eightstone [Height: 5ft 7 | CW: 9st 12lbs| BMI: 21 | Gender: F]
Created: Thu Sep 29 04:18:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/551i3d/thinspo_in_honour_of_those_of_us_who_are_trying/
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http://imgur.com/gallery/WIw5n
[Help] What the hell
/u/eightstone [Height: 5ft 7 | CW: 9st 12lbs| BMI: 21 | Gender: F]
Created: Thu Sep 29 03:45:50 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/551et9/what_the_hell/
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I weighed 9st 9lbs on Sunday. I've eaten 500 calories a day, every day, since then. I weighed in every day (first thing in the morning) at 9st 9lbs. I'm just waiting, waiting, waiting... I *know* the weight has got to drop sometime soon. I'm at *such* a deficit. Today I weigh in 9st 10lbs. WHAT IS HAPPENING. I love salty food and those 500 cals have involved high sodium things, plus the floorboards I weigh myself on are a little wonky and I suppose could throw off the scale a tiny bit, but they're generally reliable. Please can I get some reassurance here that putting on weight right now is an actual impossibility? I feel like the amazing photosynthesising woman.
[Hand] High five for hand pics! Here's mine with my short stubby fingers and 2wk old nail polish
/u/kiisutriinu
Created: Thu Sep 29 03:06:03 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/551b3v/high_five_for_hand_pics_heres_mine_with_my_short/
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http://imgur.com/fz35RIh
[Discussion] DAE eat tiny amounts of junk as opposed to actual nutritious food?
/u/Casablanca_Insomnia [5'3 | 102 | 18.63 | -21 | F]
Created: Thu Sep 29 02:55:13 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/551a1p/dae_eat_tiny_amounts_of_junk_as_opposed_to_actual/
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I constantly feel like a fraud cause I eat terribly. My calories for the day mostly come from some sort of salt or sugar filled monstrosity. Guess I feel like if I'm gonna waste calories it might as well be on something I like. Just wanted to see if anyone else does the same thing, it'll make me feel slightly better.
[Rant/Rave] Was diagnosed with PCOS last week, I feel so angry (stupid rant, feel free to ignore)
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Sep 29 01:31:59 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5512qf/was_diagnosed_with_pcos_last_week_i_feel_so_angry/
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[deleted]
[Help] Compulsory Restriction due to Lack of $$$$$
/u/eboneezah [169| 64.6| 22.7| 8 | F]
Created: Thu Sep 29 01:20:31 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5511ni/compulsory_restriction_due_to_lack_of/
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Soooo i basically have been working out like crazy these past 4 weeks, lost 8 kilos stilll have at least 8 more to go - currently weigh 64Kgs (145 lbs) at 1.69M (5.6"), and I wand to be in the mid 50s, anyways, I quit my job and my boss has been refusing to hand over my last paycheck, so when I went grocery shopping today, my cards wouldnt work. Come home to realize I have literally $2.80 on my account and the next paycheck i get from my babysitting job is on th 20th OCTOBER. So basically I need to...starve for the next 3 weeks, basically living off tea and water I guess. My card is one of those pre paid ones that wont let you withdraw more than you have, so I am literally living in a first world country and might just die of starvation LOL. OAN I do hope I am able to shed the remaining stubborn fat.
Attached a screenshot of my bank balance, yeah I live in Germany so excuse the weird words
http://imgur.com/y5WLP0m
Anyone have tips on how I can stretch the money over the next few weeks??
[Hand] Finally a bandwagon I can jump on!
/u/Ire_of_suburbia [5'4" | 92lbs | 16,1 | -46 | F]
Created: Thu Sep 29 00:40:42 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/550xwe/finally_a_bandwagon_i_can_jump_on/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/92d27e738b1a4718bdc5fdf4f60c65ed?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=74388aa3ea5f010d69b60e5f8ffcef97
[Meme/Humor] Can some of you guys come to the store with me?
/u/AbandonEarth [:'(]
Created: Thu Sep 29 00:18:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/550vpb/can_some_of_you_guys_come_to_the_store_with_me/
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That way it'll look like I'm having a party rather than shamefully eating it all alone in my room.
quick edit: I'm conflicted on whether to flair this as humor or rant.
[Discussion] A psychological, study, I guess
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Sep 28 23:22:43 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/550pr0/a_psychological_study_i_guess/
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[removed]
[Intro] Hello. New user.
/u/ladymiku [5'4" | 163lbs | 28 | -14lbs | F/18]
Created: Wed Sep 28 23:21:33 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/550pmg/hello_new_user/
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Hello, r/proED. I am u/ladymiku, and I hate eating food. This is my story.
I was born as the only daughter of a reasonably thin, kindly mother (yes, her thinness is important) and a misogynistic, narcissistic father. I also have a brother, and obviously he is the favorite.
When I was a child, I was chubby and everyone thought that was cute. However, my father thought I was too skinny. So he basically had me eating ridiculously large portions all the time. Pretty soon it got to the point that he was using food as a punishment, holding me hostage at the table and not letting me leave until I had eaten every single thing on the plate. My brother, on the other hand, could choose to eat or not. So of course I began to resent that. One of my earliest memories is when I was about three or four years old, ~~not~~ eating breakfast in my Minnie Mouse nightgown, just staring at the scrambled eggs for half an hour, wishing they would just go away. I almost fell asleep at the table.
Over the years, I learned to "shut up and eat," as my father constantly scolded me. And so, I steadily gained weight. Finally, at the age of nine, I was unquestionably fat, so fat that I got my period too early, and these horrible ugly breasts grew. My brother abused me, until I stood up to him with the help of my dear mama. (Thanks, mama.) My father, ever the controller, decided at this time to start berating me for being too fat. He said things like, "You're starting to look like a young lady. But you're getting cellulite. Do squats, it'll make your butt look good." (creepynope.jpg)
Fast forward to age 13. My poor mama had been diagnosed with leukemia. She was so miserable. I did anything I could to be good. I even donated my hair (it was like, a foot long, and after I cut it, my father was like, haha you're bald). She certainly appreciated it, but I just couldn't help her. Two years later, she passed away, but her last words to me were that I was a good daughter and she was proud.
Age 15. My father's force-feeding of me got worse now that my mama wasn't here to protect me. I ballooned up to 177 pounds, which, at a height of 5ft 4in, is Class I obesity. I was absolutely disgusted with myself, because I could not control even this little thing. So I started overdosing on coffee to purge myself, a habit that continues to this day. I managed to reduce to 165, and then stalled there, because my father had wised up, and upped his game, justifying the unending stream of meals with his bullshit of "the body can't handle a few hours of hunger". And all the while, he kept saying, "I just want you to look pretty."
Now I'm 18 and in college. I am exercising more and trying to eat less, using a picture of my mama as thinspiration. And guess what my father is doing? Sabotaging all my hard work, and getting angry when I watch my portions. Trust me, if I could go 24 hours without eating a single calorie, I totally would. I never experience hunger, and I am simply tired of eating.
Thank you for listening. [Here is a picture of my hand.](http://imgur.com/gallery/Woa26) It's one thing I like about my body.
[Other] Well, back on track to not being fat food haul.
/u/SkinnyisSexy [5'7.6 |128.4|gw115|19.6| F]
Created: Wed Sep 28 23:04:49 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/550nqf/well_back_on_track_to_not_being_fat_food_haul/
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http://imgur.com/yBsgt8u
Best pro Ana documentaries and movies?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Sep 28 22:30:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/550jpj/best_pro_ana_documentaries_and_movies/
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[deleted]
[Discussion] ED and Food Waste
/u/yummmies [5'4" | 125 | -40 | F]
Created: Wed Sep 28 21:55:49 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/550f82/ed_and_food_waste/
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Basically my friend brought me a noodle salad from the place she works at and I threw more than half of it out and I feel like shit.
I dumped the food. It was noodles and tofu, some of my favorite things, with a dressing I really enjoyed. But the calories. I could've stashed it in my fridge for a few days, but I didn't want to have it so ready so I trashed it as soon as she was out of sight. I am going to lie to her face, and tell her just how much I enjoyed it for lunch the next day.
Part of my feelings do involve just the general shittiness that comes with wasting food. A deeper part is just the lies and the effort I wasted on her part and the lies upon lies. I throw out perfectly good food for no good reasons, and I am just such a big fat liar. I know a lot of us have dealt with this situation of "wasting" food in our ED journey in one way or another.
I kinda want to talk about just the concept of wasting food. Some people grew up eating whatever they wanted, and can throw out what they don't want. Others, like me, grew up in a household where as much food as possible must be eaten because of value or money or whatever and the concept of just throwing out food is very difficult to fully wrap our heads around around. I'm just wondering what are your thoughts on food waste, and does that hold you back? How do you handle foods that are triggering? What about sentimental foods/homecooked things?
[Hand] Hand pic as well.
/u/BlackGirlSteeze
Created: Wed Sep 28 21:52:44 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/550etp/hand_pic_as_well/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/ccf18c4d9b604f5290745c5da7605f7a?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=256429fff3258190232ba530d437e132
[Thinspo] Counting calories with a ballerina. I saw this on r/fatlogic but thought you lovelies might find it interesting. Great thinspo, too!
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Sep 28 19:46:02 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54zwm7/counting_calories_with_a_ballerina_i_saw_this_on/
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https://youtu.be/5356zt0JiDY
[Intro] [Intro]
/u/obscureramen
Created: Wed Sep 28 19:24:47 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54ztgp/intro/
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[removed]
[Rant/Rave] I like this.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Sep 28 18:58:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54zpg3/i_like_this/
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[deleted]
[Goal] Ughhhhh I've been non stop binging
/u/KajaIsForeverAlone [height:5'9 | CW: 147 BMI:21 | weight lost:15 lbs | Gender: F]
Created: Wed Sep 28 18:54:59 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54zouy/ughhhhh_ive_been_non_stop_binging/
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The other day I ate 4 sushi rolls (not the healthy kind) and a shit ton of pizza. Lots of cereal and whatever I'm able to find. This morning I was gonna fast but I fucked up and ate a cookie and shake from work .-.
No more food! Tomorrow im staring my fast. I'm gonna fast for at least 1 week straight, but my goal is 2! I'm gonna run every night and I'm gonna get skinny cuz I'm sick of all my flab
[Thinspo] Kinda liked how I looked in this sext ;)
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Sep 28 18:51:32 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54zobq/kinda_liked_how_i_looked_in_this_sext/
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http://imgur.com/30RohHF
[Discussion] How do you still have the energy to exercise?
/u/OliveEyes- [5'5" | 146.8 | 25 | -4lbs | M]
Created: Wed Sep 28 18:28:25 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54zkvj/how_do_you_still_have_the_energy_to_exercise/
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and how much?
[Thinspo] Hump day thinspo to get you through the week <3
/u/krebsunicycle [5'7" | 110lbs | 17.17 | F]
Created: Wed Sep 28 18:28:02 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54zkti/hump_day_thinspo_to_get_you_through_the_week_3/
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http://imgur.com/a/wAj39
[Rant/Rave] Someone asked if I was expecting today...
/u/txla107 [5'5" | CW:133 lb GW:115 | 21.8 | +10 | F]
Created: Wed Sep 28 18:18:43 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54zjbq/someone_asked_if_i_was_expecting_today/
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Guess who binged all day
Yes, I'm expecting a food baby. And everlasting shame and self-loathing.
[Other] Jumping in on the pic thing! My hand looks huge but I always liked how my arm/ wrist looks in this pic
/u/ikillsouls [5' 2" | 105 | 19.2 | -21 lb | f]
Created: Wed Sep 28 17:47:33 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54zegv/jumping_in_on_the_pic_thing_my_hand_looks_huge/
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https://i.redd.it/p8uhlrl4vcox.jpg
Jumping in on the pic thing! My hand looks huge but I always liked how my arm looks in this pic
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Sep 28 17:44:53 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54ze1y/jumping_in_on_the_pic_thing_my_hand_looks_huge/
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https://i.redd.it/3qd0jaroucox.jpg
[Help] I binged! Help!
/u/baby_wants_to_ride
Created: Wed Sep 28 17:33:53 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54zcae/i_binged_help/
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[removed]
[Thinspo] Daily Thinspo. 💕
/u/BlackGirlSteeze
Created: Wed Sep 28 17:19:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54z9zz/daily_thinspo/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/e9dc50a6b72e4f93b4ffa9ac00acf568?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=21777fa01427e02832360f9b0764d0db
How my ice-cream shop interview went.
/u/BlackGirlSteeze
Created: Wed Sep 28 17:18:05 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54z9tn/how_my_icecream_shop_interview_went/
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[removed]
[Intro] I've decided to introduce myself
/u/unreasonablerhyme [5'5" | 128 | 21.55 | F]
Created: Wed Sep 28 17:15:01 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54z9an/ive_decided_to_introduce_myself/
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Hey everybody. I've been a lurker for a while but I feel like an introduction is in order, I guess. I used to be active on MPA and really appreciated having a place to go to for support from like-minded people. This seems like an even better place for that, to me. You all seem very non judgmental and kind and I hope that I can contribute.
Meh, so... I'm 25, but I feel closer to 50 most days. It's been a rough life so far as I'm sure a lot of people here can relate. My relationship with food has been a crazy downward spiral since I was about 11. Sophomore year of high school I weighed close to 200 pounds and hated myself more than anything. I'm down about 70 pounds from that point but the self loathing is still strong, as it probably will always be.
I don't have any friends so it'll be nice to just be able to talk to other people every once in a while. I spend most of my time alone and I sleep too much, but I'm trying to turn that around and bring my depression to more manageable levels.
I don't want this to be long, so I'll just end this with a thank you to anyone who bothers to read it. It's just me taking one small step toward feeling less like a worthless pariah and more like an actual human being. Hopefully.
[Discussion] What "safe foods" do you use to kill cravings?
/u/throwaway0908123 [5'7 | 122.2 | 19.07 | -14.8 | F]
Created: Wed Sep 28 16:40:15 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54z3r3/what_safe_foods_do_you_use_to_kill_cravings/
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I keep a bag of salty licorice in my pantry for when I'm feeling especially bingey- it tastes kind of gross but the amount of salt in it absolutely *destroys* food cravings. Do any of you use foods like this to stop binges? What are they?
[Rant/Rave] I fucked up :(
/u/frozenfleurs [5'8" | hella fat | -6.0 | F | GW: 99]
Created: Wed Sep 28 16:37:24 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54z3ax/i_fucked_up/
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I binged for like two weeks and gained 7 pounds, then I tried to get back on track today and walked to the store to get some fruit and veggies for smoothies, but I ended up buying a pint of ice cream and ate it :(
I just can't seem to get back on track, I've lost all my motivation and everything. I need to get to my goal weight by February, but I keep messing up.
[Goal] Finally lost an inch!
/u/Logistikon [5'1'' | CW 93.0 lbs | 17.57/18.35 | -10.0 | F]
Created: Wed Sep 28 16:32:42 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54z2jb/finally_lost_an_inch/
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http://i.imgur.com/8xr1PtW.jpg
[Other] I'm back...kind of (recovery-related, delete if not allowed)
/u/star-of-morning [5'1" | 109 | -25 | 22 F]
Created: Wed Sep 28 16:05:28 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54yxut/im_backkind_of_recoveryrelated_delete_if_not/
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I don't know if anyone here remembers me, but I posted a lot from the end of March to the end of May. In the beginning of June, I went to residential treatment for my anorexia and I was away for 6 weeks. I had to leave a few weeks early because of my insurance. While there, I got better. I gained weight, was mentally healthier and...I fell in love. I know - it sounds horrible - to meet and fall in love with someone who you were in TREATMENT with. Anyways, she moved in with me after she got out of treatment (20 days after I did) and we are living a healthy, pro-recovery lifestyle together.
Anyways, I'm posting here because I guess I really really miss my eating disorder. I want it back. I hate my recovery body. I miss being obsessed with my weight and calories and getting tinier and more beautiful every day.
I could easily go back to restriction at anytime. The only thing holding me back is my wonderful girlfriend. Right now, I know I'm going to marry this girl. But I know if I go back to my eating disorder, that fate *may* change. I don't want to lose her and I know relapsing will most likely guarantee I lose her. She's told me if I relapsed and went to treatment again, she would stay with me. Even if I relapsed and went to treatment again and she stayed with me, maybe I wouldn't be losing the relationship but I'd be losing precious time with her.
Part of me feels like I won't end up in treatment again even if I did relapse, because I feel like I *could* stop restricting once I got down to my pre-treatment weight, because for once in my life I have something worth staying healthy for. Someone worth staying healthy for and stopping my behaviors.
I don't know. She hasn't gone back to work since being back from treatment and I took the semester off. In my mind, I'm going to go back to restricting once she's back at work. I don't think I want recovery anymore.
Again, sorry if this is too recovery-ish. If it is, mods, you can delete this post. I didn't know who else to talk to about this and I remember this community being very supportive and warm. I grew SO close to so many of you in the spring.
x
[Goal] was feeling kind of good about my legs yesterday :)
/u/lordjoji [5'3" | CW: 103 lbs | 18.75 | GW: 100 lbs | F]
Created: Wed Sep 28 15:57:39 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54ywhf/was_feeling_kind_of_good_about_my_legs_yesterday/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/f53136aa7b8e49e699e04c21b0efcaf3?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=b0058a3651ca0ced4e48ff94e57b6f3a
[Help] i'm losing weight, but i don't know why.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Sep 28 15:51:25 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54yvfo/im_losing_weight_but_i_dont_know_why/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] Can I just rant about last night?
/u/Aprikoosi_flex
Created: Wed Sep 28 15:46:39 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54yum9/can_i_just_rant_about_last_night/
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Tried to be strong as I've gained 15lb since I started dating my bf. I got batteries for my scale and was productive but at the end of the night I ate SEVEN BAGEL BITES.
They were gone before I could even realize what I was doing 😭
Fasting today with just coffee and water but my bf watches me so carefully and forces me to eat. Ugh.
[Hand] I to have a hand.
/u/Miss_Embie [5'6" | 131 | 21.1 | -21| F]
Created: Wed Sep 28 15:29:39 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54yrko/i_to_have_a_hand/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/047c14a78bab48c89ae1c9c7699e7c1f?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=d06efdc08b5589366875f5bae693e5dc
[Help] Advice Wanted
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Sep 28 15:07:18 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54ynhj/advice_wanted/
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[deleted]
[Thinspo] She's such a beauty. Her body is perfection to me.
/u/rmehta96
Created: Wed Sep 28 14:43:07 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54yivl/shes_such_a_beauty_her_body_is_perfection_to_me/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/3b4eb5b080884b11be6232042a1b08f8?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=a535715229a5dd77304951e009549783
[Rant/Rave] Is there a way to prevent bloating from certain foods?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Sep 28 14:38:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54yi2r/is_there_a_way_to_prevent_bloating_from_certain/
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[deleted]
[Tip] New Halo Top flavors to be released on 10/10! Hell yeah!
/u/InSkyLimitEra [5' 7.25" | HW 180 | CW 113 | LW 113 | 29 F]
Created: Wed Sep 28 14:33:37 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54yh1a/new_halo_top_flavors_to_be_released_on_1010_hell/
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https://www.facebook.com/HaloTop/photos/a.308657522593688.1073741825.237044696421638/1005881422871291/?type=3&theater
[Meme/Humor] Yes. 😙
/u/DenyMyHunger [5'7"| Fat! | UGW:112| F]
Created: Wed Sep 28 14:11:42 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54yd26/yes/
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http://imgur.com/GapbBce
[Tip] frozen desserts with more calories than the label says.
/u/ChubbyBunny8 [5'2" | 137 | 25.96 | -13 | F]
Created: Wed Sep 28 14:01:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54yb0j/frozen_desserts_with_more_calories_than_the_label/
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http://www.today.com/id/48596412/ns/today-today_news/t/rossen-reports-can-you-believe-diet-frozen-dessert-labels/#.V-wXECTbnIU
[Hand] Are we doing hands? Thanks mom and dad for the genes!
/u/Kalibrering [193cm/6'4"| 82kg/180lb | BMI 20.1 | -13kg/28lb | Male]
Created: Wed Sep 28 13:33:43 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54y5tf/are_we_doing_hands_thanks_mom_and_dad_for_the/
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http://imgur.com/a/z0Gob
[Help] Looking for youtuber/blogger inspo.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Sep 28 13:28:21 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54y4tx/looking_for_youtuberblogger_inspo/
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[deleted]
[Help] Coping with the cold weather
/u/amyrj28 [Height: 157cm | CW: 6st 7lbs | BMI: 16.7 | F]
Created: Wed Sep 28 13:16:53 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54y2p1/coping_with_the_cold_weather/
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Okay, so the weather is getting colder, and i'm freezing cold already lol. What does everyone do to tolerate the cold better, or make it easier on themselves?
I've ordered 2 pairs of winter leggings from ebay, bought a pair of thick tights to try, I have leg warmers, bought a thick knitted hat and scarf, some thermal socks, a thicker coat. I'm going to buy some gloves tomorrow and some thicker jumpers (Sweaters), and I also bought a thicker wool cardigan. Any other suggestions/advice?
I walk a mile each way to and from work, sometimes at 5.30am, and sometimes at 10.30pm, and temperatures can get as low as in the minuses when it's colder here.
Any tips or advice would be most welcome, and sorry if this question has been asked before.
Amy.
[Goal] I'm gonna cry I have hip bones again
/u/The_Marshmallow_Test [5'5 | CW-120lbs | GW-SkinnyArms&Cheekbones| F]
Created: Wed Sep 28 13:03:38 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54y042/im_gonna_cry_i_have_hip_bones_again/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/1ce6f4b4659b41b38b0eda3c4ad9b741?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=4f5d314f2dde6190e3125af9d1e37b8a
[Thinspo] If it was easy, everyone would do it
/u/eightstone [Height: 5ft 7 | CW: 9st 12lbs| BMI: 21 | Gender: F]
Created: Wed Sep 28 12:54:17 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54xybs/if_it_was_easy_everyone_would_do_it/
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http://imgur.com/gallery/8T5dT
[Help] I've had a really bad binge week... Help on getting back on track?
/u/TiredOfBeingFat_ [6'0"| CW251 |BMI34 | 22lost | GW130]
Created: Wed Sep 28 12:23:53 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54xsip/ive_had_a_really_bad_binge_week_help_on_getting/
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I'm currently readjusting to my birth control and it has my hormones all out of whack. I've done nothing but binge all day everyday the past week and I've been way too scared to weigh myself. :( I feel bloated, gross, and a complete failure. The only good that's even come out of all this binging is that my girlfriend seems really happy when I eat, even if it is gigantic portion and uncontrollable binges. She's just happy I'm actually eating.
I wanted to do a 24 hour fast. But I woke up this morning and was deathly hungry and ate everything in my kitchen, now I'm currently curled up in bed dying.
My Vyvanse usually stops my appetite pretty well. But it isn't doing shit for it right now and I think it's just hormones. I'm so afraid I've gained back so much already...
[Thinspo] Love <3 Counting Calories with a Ballerina
/u/oksneaky [63in | CW: 124.8 | GW: 115 | F]
Created: Wed Sep 28 11:55:34 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54xn73/love_3_counting_calories_with_a_ballerina/
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5356zt0JiDY&feature=youtu.be
[Help] Help: how to avoid emotional eating/binging?
/u/realbutterflybaby [5'1" | CW: 105±1 GW: 88±1 | -26 lbs | F]
Created: Wed Sep 28 11:44:44 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54xl6w/help_how_to_avoid_emotional_eatingbinging/
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My life has been so rough recently and I have caught myself binging for no reason other than I'm sad... and then I'm even more upset after and just seem to have no control over anything in my life. Does anyone have advice? It's so hard. I just want to be happy with myself.
[Hand] Not really proud of it, but here's my hand!
/u/citrus_cunt [5' 9"| 139lbs | 19.5| +2lbs | F]
Created: Wed Sep 28 10:52:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54xbhb/not_really_proud_of_it_but_heres_my_hand/
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http://imgur.com/SUKjnFM
[Discussion] What exactly is vanity sizing?
/u/citrus_cunt [5' 9"| 139lbs | 19.5| +2lbs | F]
Created: Wed Sep 28 10:24:32 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54x6b1/what_exactly_is_vanity_sizing/
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I mean, I'm hardly new when it comes to eating disorder communities, but man am I out of the loop. Recently 20 and I'm already unable to keep up with all that hip lingo you cool kids are spouting.
But yeah, I've seen the word thrown around a lot but even with context I still have no clue what it actually is.
[Rant/Rave] I'm pissed at my friends because of food (Rant)
/u/sprinkle1997 [5'1 | CW 134 GW 100 | -22 lbs | 19F]
Created: Wed Sep 28 10:18:59 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54x5ay/im_pissed_at_my_friends_because_of_food_rant/
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We're all in college and come from different states so for Thanksgiving break, we really miss each other! We decided to have a little Thanksgiving meal together. The problem is, they picked out all this fucking unhealthy food and then put it on the invitations and sent them out. The healthiest thing on there is rainbow roasted vegetables, which will of course have to be seasoned to hell for them to eat. I'm just so pissed, it's all cheesy pastas, potato casserole, buttery rice....even the beans are going to have bacon bits in them. To be honest, it sounds disgusting. It's just fucking ridiculous to me and everyone is all like yeah that sounds delicious blah blah blah. I don't want to be that one friend who ruins it for everyone and puts a damper on the mood. I understand that for lots of people Thanksgiving is a time of the year to pig out, but this isn't the case for me. Like I literally don't even wanna go anymore. I hate ED, I can't even enjoy a nice meal with my friends and I find myself resenting them in situations involving food. This isn't who I want to be.
[Discussion] Daily Food Diary! September 28, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Wed Sep 28 10:02:33 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54x272/daily_food_diary_september_28_2016/
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This is a daily food diary thread for September 28, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
[Rant/Rave] Why can't I do this??
/u/dnedna [5'7" | 116 | 18.15 | GW:110 | F]
Created: Wed Sep 28 09:45:11 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54wyza/why_cant_i_do_this/
---
I’m trying to essay write but my brain is so so foggy and I can’t get it done, and I NEED to so I went to a shop to try and find something small to eat to make my head clear. I cried in front of the display of 85 calorie cereal bars and left the store empty handed. I have plenty of spare calories left in my day. I’m supposed to be eating MORE so I have enough energy for this term and the sport I’m trialling for. I hate that I’m in control but at the same time I’m so out of control :(
[Hand] Ooh ooh, we're doing hand posts!? Awh yiss... I knew I was saving this strange photo for something. Here is my weird looking hand!
/u/smokesanddietcokes [Doesn't actually know what she's talking about.]
Created: Wed Sep 28 09:42:22 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54wyf2/ooh_ooh_were_doing_hand_posts_awh_yiss_i_knew_i/
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http://i.imgur.com/IEgFYn1.jpg
[Other] I saw a hand post so I figured it's okay to share my wrist actually looking decent c:
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Sep 28 09:31:35 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54wwcc/i_saw_a_hand_post_so_i_figured_its_okay_to_share/
---
http://imgur.com/xmBQNxD
[Goal] Another (hopfully- but probably not- final) accountability post
/u/DivingRightIn [72in | don't ask | don't tell | ~57.2lbs | UGW: 120lbs | F]
Created: Wed Sep 28 09:30:43 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54ww6b/another_hopfully_but_probably_not_final/
---
[removed]
[Meme/Humor] It Was Only a Kiss
/u/daisiesordemons [60in | CW:126lbs | GW: 110lbs | -20 | F]
Created: Wed Sep 28 09:05:42 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54wrju/it_was_only_a_kiss/
---
http://imgur.com/ZD7WU4f
[Goal] Weighed myself for the first time since vacation and surprised to have knocked out my first 3 goals! 🙌
/u/lyxil [5' 0"| 95 lb | 19.54 | -45 | f]
Created: Wed Sep 28 08:59:00 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54wqa1/weighed_myself_for_the_first_time_since_vacation/
---
http://i.imgur.com/kJkjXq9.jpg
[Discussion] How many of you use an upper calorie limit vs. trying to eat as close to 0 as possible each day?
/u/Thunder2WonderThighs
Created: Wed Sep 28 08:43:38 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54wnls/how_many_of_you_use_an_upper_calorie_limit_vs/
---
I'm trying a different strategy this week: treating each day as an attempted fast and only eating when I absolutely feel like I HAVE to have something solid.
I found that I've been able to restrict to much lower levels this way (100-500 cals a day) compared to when I try to give myself an upper limit and eat under it. When I start to get close to my upper limit it tends to trigger binges.
Does anyone else use this strategy?
[Goal] 60 hours into a fast!
/u/MulattoKhaleesi
Created: Wed Sep 28 08:17:12 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54wj2t/60_hours_into_a_fast/
---
I have never done one this long but I've already lost 9 lbs of water weight. I can see how addicting this could be. I think I'll go as long as I can, but how do you usually reintroduce foods after a long fast? I am thinking about starting with broth and soups, then veggies before I do another fast. What do you ladies usually eat first after a fast?
[Discussion] Free starbucks drink??
/u/krassota
Created: Wed Sep 28 07:39:21 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54wd0t/free_starbucks_drink/
---
Also my first post after lurking for a while!
So I've racked up enough starbucks reward stars to get a free drink, and I have no clue of what to get. I usually always just get black coffee, but I really don't wanna waste my free drink on that. I want to get my money's worth, but all their huge sugary drinks have like a days worth of calories in it.
Any suggestions of a big expensive drink that is somewhat low-cal?
Fitting an xS for the first time in my life is pretty fun, even if it is from Forever21 where vanity sizing reigns supreme
/u/notyourtoy [5'8" | 127 lbs | 19.1 BMI | -36 lbs | F]
Created: Wed Sep 28 06:51:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54w5rf/fitting_an_xs_for_the_first_time_in_my_life_is/
---
http://imgur.com/oKgKXpo
[Discussion] trying to be better october
/u/gin-and-lemon [🐝 5'1"| cw: 155lbs | bmi: 30 | -7lbs | f ]
Created: Wed Sep 28 06:09:50 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54vzw2/trying_to_be_better_october/
---
so hi! what have you been fucking up? eating too many carbs? missing classes too many times? doing something you wish you were not doing but you still do it frequently enough that you're more than moderately annoyed with yourself?
for me, its letting my anxiety get the better of me, along with letting my sleep cycle get fucked. i keep missing class, and its obvs not good because university isn't cheap. the sleep thing is negatively impacting my control on eating (sleepy binges man, fuck 'em), and i often punish myself for missing class though food (which hey, anything to restrict right?).
i also need to work on managing calories from alcohol better, instead of just internally screaming at myself that 'ITS TOTALLY OKAY BOOZE DOESNT COUNT' while ed brain just screams 'FAT FAT FAT' over and over.
so my goals for october would be:
* be strict with myself in all aspects
** which includes but is not limited to: sleep, eating, going to class
* be at 145 by the end of the month
* go for more walks now that its not as hot out
what are your goals for the next month? how do you plan on reaching them?
[Discussion] Way To Go Wednesday September 28, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Wed Sep 28 06:02:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54vyz7/way_to_go_wednesday_september_28_2016/
---
This is the weekly achievement thread for September 28, 2016.
This weekly thread is to spotlight those achievements you feel don't necessarily warrant their own post, but you'd like to celebrate all the same. This is not limited to specifically ED-related goals; share anything you are happy about having done or accomplished recently!
*****
Achievement threads are posted every Wednesday.
Have any questions or concerns? Comment below, or [PM the mods.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FproED)
Was taking a picture of my water bottle and was really happy with how my hand bones looked:))
/u/kennedyconnolly [5'9| 120 | 17.4]
Created: Wed Sep 28 05:56:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54vy7r/was_taking_a_picture_of_my_water_bottle_and_was/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/e6976b11c8a441cc9cd3cf4d2f13ef0b?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=e547e78c55087e30665ae4e28c61ad28
[Discussion] Instagram accounts to follow?
/u/RainyDayDaydream [5'6 | ?? | ?? | ?? | Lady]
Created: Wed Sep 28 04:01:55 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54vmb8/instagram_accounts_to_follow/
---
I think the title says it all. Not just instagrams for thinspo (I dont think its allowed?) But also recipe ideas, inspirational quotes..that kind of stuff. Any suggestions would be great!
[Discussion] How did you choose the number for your UGW?
/u/aerienne [5'5" | 138 | 23.2 | -32 | F]
Created: Tue Sep 27 23:13:45 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54uuho/how_did_you_choose_the_number_for_your_ugw/
---
I chose 105. For now. 110 is nice, but it's too close to the teens. I like numbers in counts of 5, so 105 was the next best. 100 is amazing, but too close to being 99 and I know it'd be too tempting to dip below.
For me 105 is manageable. I believe I could maintain it and not call too much attention to myself. I'll think about it again when I get closer.
[Meme/Humor] For those of you that like Pokemon...
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Sep 27 21:59:14 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54ulkb/for_those_of_you_that_like_pokemon/
---
https://www.reddit.com/r/pokemon/comments/54rhe2/wants_to_eat_by_winicklim/?ref=share&ref_source=link
[Help] Gastroparesis...?
/u/cannibale101 [5'4 | HW:150smtg | CW: heh | GW:108 | 28F]
Created: Tue Sep 27 21:42:55 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54ujil/gastroparesis/
---
Has anyone experienced this? Is it serious? Is it reversible..? I'm scared i might be developing something like that but need reassurance before i say anything to a professional.
I ate a lot (i mean A LOT, like one of my worst binges in 12 years) for three days straight after fasting for about a week, then threw up everything from the 2 last binge days, almost entirely undigested, along with gastric mucus and a little blood (from a burnt throat i think). Then i've been feeling nauseous for 3 days now and am still having a hard time eating or drinking anything (even water) without it seeming to pass at all for hours. I'm still impressively bloated even though i ate very little in the last days. Also, haven't had a BM since, i pee very little and it comes out orange/brownish.
I'm still working on rehydrating myself and have avoided EC stacks, coffee and alcohol since. Powerade Zero isn't available in my area so i went for plain coconut water for electrolytes. I force myself to eat and be gentle, and i aim for healthy foods for now instead of low cal/processed stuff -out of fear, honestly.
Any input is greatly appreciated, thanks :)
[Thinspo] Alexis Ren Thinspo 😩
/u/newportshorty [5'9 | fat | 19F]
Created: Tue Sep 27 21:33:14 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54ui8u/alexis_ren_thinspo/
---
http://imgur.com/eNRc4l8
[Discussion] So depressed I accidentally fasted
/u/throwaway03199519 [5'6 | CW 114 | GW 110| 18.47| -22| F]
Created: Tue Sep 27 21:28:22 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54uhlh/so_depressed_i_accidentally_fasted/
---
Has this happened to anyone? It helps that yesterday was a binge but today I just didn't eat and haven't felt hungry. If anything I've just had a massive headache and swollen eyes from crying
[Rant/Rave] I have had the most horrible day....
/u/pinotblanc [5'3 | GW:115 | 24.8 | -11 | F]
Created: Tue Sep 27 19:59:18 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54u4st/i_have_had_the_most_horrible_day/
---
I had the worst day today. Honestly, it has been the worst in several months. Over 12 hours my anxiety, depression, and panic disorder were *all* triggered. I finally went home and has 3 glasses of wine after being sober for 9 days. I know I'll feel like a failure for drinking and I'll probably not lose any weight tomorrow morning, but I didn't know how else to cope with the horrible day.
Just needing some support that I'm not the worst person in the world for reverting back to past habits :/
[Help] Eating at restaurant??
/u/The_Marshmallow_Test [5'5 | CW-120lbs | GW-SkinnyArms&Cheekbones| F]
Created: Tue Sep 27 19:34:05 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54u10q/eating_at_restaurant/
---
Hey guys I'm getting lunch with my mom tomorrow, probably Japanese, at a restaurant that doesn't have calorie counts.
Any tips/tricks? I rarely eat out anymore so I haven't had to deal with kinda thing in a while.
The biggest thing for me is I want to be able to estimate the calorie count at least roughly. How do you do that? I have like nooo idea about how to approximate calories when it comes to restaurant food.
**edit** ah this is all the helpful, thanks for easing my anxiety about tomorrow guys <333 I think I'll go with sashimi, my mom is Japanese and ordering a meal without rice is probably the best way to make her suspicious lol. I'll get a side of rice and try not to eat most of it tho.
**update** omg you guys, lunch went so great. I was able to actually enjoy myself and not stress about calories. It was a traditional meal set so I had to get some things I hadn't planned on which would have freaked me out but now that I can kinda estimate how many calories I ate, I don't feel like the entire day was ruined or anything. Also my mom told me I looked so much skinnier!! :D
Literally I wish I could give you all a big hug.
The damage:
-6 thin/small pieces of sashimi ~ 200 calories
- 2 asparagus tempura ~ 60 cal
- 2 piece of eggplant tempura ~ 120cal
- 1/2 bowl of rice ~ 100 cal
- Miso soup ~ 60 cal
- Assorted low cal extras, veggies, tea ~ 50 cal
Total- roughly 600 calories
Not ideal for the day but not bad!
[Intro] Other people who are larger/overweight?
/u/lunarian7
Created: Tue Sep 27 18:50:48 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54tugj/other_people_who_are_largeroverweight/
---
*New, never posted before*
I know that there are plenty of people who have EDs starting out overweight etc. but most of the internet places centered around EDs that I've been in have been filled mostly with people who are at lower weights. Nothing wrong with that, but it's been discouraging. I often feel that I shouldn't even bother since these people who are already so much closer to being skinny than I am are struggling so much. I'm just hoping for some comfort that I'm not the only one here starting out high.
I've been at this for about five years on and off. I started when I was 15 and the first time I restricted was by far the most successful. My parents didn't have a scale so I went mostly by how my clothes fit and buying new jeans in the same brand but smaller size etc. From September to January I had lost a lot of weight to the point of old clothes falling off of me. After that my pattern started. Restricting for a few months and then going back to normal eating because I would give up and give into my need to eat and also because I missed feeling normal and happy and just being able to eat food without obsessing. Then, something would trigger me (namely doctor visits where I was too nervous to ask the nurse to not tell me my weight). The cycle has continued and here I am at age 20, going into another period of restriction.
I am 5'10". My lowest weight ever was around 150 lbs. when I was 15 and a few inches shorter. Highest was 200 last fall. This spring I weighed around 180 after a major restrictive period and then I have since ballooned back up but am too scared to find out how much.
If anyone has any similar experiences especially with the higher weight or the cycles of restricting and then "recovering", please share. Thank you
[Rant/Rave] Don't have Halo Top but we finally got something in :D
/u/H2OandCaffeine [5ft7 | FAT | -20 lbs | F]
Created: Tue Sep 27 18:14:31 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54toto/dont_have_halo_top_but_we_finally_got_something/
---
http://imgur.com/H3h556F
[Rant/Rave] Visiting my family this week and it's a disaster
/u/cinamintoast [5'6" | 203 | 32.76 | -67 | F]
Created: Tue Sep 27 17:08:24 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54tenu/visiting_my_family_this_week_and_its_a_disaster/
---
Literally the first thing my mom did when I got here was offer me cake, and got mad when I said I wasn't hungry. I lost 70 lb since I last saw my family and I was hoping someone would say something but instead they've just been trying to feed me 24/7. I have been eating dinners with them to appear normal and they keep serving shit like hamburgers and mac and cheese and I just eat it. Then I'm trying to hang out with my friends that live here while I'm visiting and we keep ending up at pubs and I end up tasting their French fries and nachos and shit. I feel so out of control and disgusting. I went hiking a few days ago and that felt good, and I've been trying to take some long walks in the evenings when it's cool, but it's not counteracting the guilt and feeling like a fat fuck. I should be happy to be on vacation and be seeing my family/friends but I really just can't wait to go home and fast away all the damage this week is doing.
David's Tea Advent Calendar
/u/icantstopmeloning [5'5" | ~100lbs | 17.1 | ~-40 | F]
Created: Tue Sep 27 16:37:14 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54t9qr/davids_tea_advent_calendar/
---
http://i.imgur.com/anAwrLn.jpg
[Discussion] Is it hard to stop once you get started?
/u/churrodonut
Created: Tue Sep 27 16:04:16 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54t49i/is_it_hard_to_stop_once_you_get_started/
---
[removed]
[Help] [Help] Accurate TDEE calculator?
/u/allquiets [5'1.5 | 138 | 26.68 | -6 | 85 | GNC]
Created: Tue Sep 27 14:20:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54slk5/help_accurate_tdee_calculator/
---
I'm looking for an accurate TDEE calculator. I've seen a couple that says I'm at 1700 when I put myself in as sedentary and .5" shorter than I am, but that seems too high. Are there any sites that you all trust?
[EDIT: On mobile, will flair when I can.]
[Help] Can I ask you guys about poops?
/u/ArturoBelano2666
Created: Tue Sep 27 14:16:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54skva/can_i_ask_you_guys_about_poops/
---
Hi all,
So for whatever clarity it might add I am a male, 23yrs old, 5'10", and ~155lbs. I recently started eating ultra low calorie (800 to 1200kcal/day) these past couple of weeks since I might be visiting my hometown soon and I would like to look as good as I did last winter (I was downright gaunt and it was great). Anyhow lately my turdular output has been super compact and bordering on painful. Most recently after wiping I noticed a little red on the TP, presumably blood.
My question is if this is normal for ultra low calorie intake? I have eaten like this before and had pretty sparse and sporadic but the firmness and pressure seems new. Is this the sort of thing I should go to a doctor for? I'm young and pretty broke and don't want to if I don't have to if course. I eat lots of fiber. I pretty much subsist on oats and vegetables. Do I just need more water or am I dying from a stomach tumor?
[Help] How do y'all calculate a calorie maintenance goal?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Sep 27 14:03:41 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54sih9/how_do_yall_calculate_a_calorie_maintenance_goal/
---
[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] Job interview tomorrow.
/u/BlackGirlSteeze
Created: Tue Sep 27 13:24:50 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54sb9e/job_interview_tomorrow/
---
I have a job interview at an ice-cream shop and I'm so nervous bc 1) it's the best ice-cream shop here. And 2) it's fucking ice-cream and everytime I think about it I picture myself BINGING everyday if I do get it. But I need a job bc I want to get my tongue split next month. Ughhhhhhhhh. I'm so stressed, you guys.
[Thinspo] Daily Thinspo 💕
/u/BlackGirlSteeze
Created: Tue Sep 27 13:20:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54salj/daily_thinspo/
---
https://i.reddituploads.com/d66764bdcb6341f884330e0038a5f108?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=81fb83c147ead9d3a2c8133273da9a89
[Help] Trying to get ADHD meds in the UK
/u/eightstone [Height: 5ft 7 | CW: 9st 12lbs| BMI: 21 | Gender: F]
Created: Tue Sep 27 13:14:19 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54s9ec/trying_to_get_adhd_meds_in_the_uk/
---
I live in the UK and on Friday have an assessment with an adult ADHD specialist. The NHS really doesn't give out drugs as easily as they do in the US. I REALLY want some drugs, not least for their appetite suppressant qualities. I know this is an awful thing to ask, but does anybody have any tips on how I should conduct myself/what I should say in order to increase my likelihood of a prescription? For what it's worth, I haven't lied about any of my symptoms thus far, and it was a psychologist who referred me to an ADHD specialist.
[Help] Need to go to the doctor but I'm hesitant
/u/salamanderqueen [5'9"| CW: 149 | SW: 180 | GW: 120 | -31 | 19F]
Created: Tue Sep 27 12:27:56 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54s0su/need_to_go_to_the_doctor_but_im_hesitant/
---
I've been having some serious issues with my period for about 6 months, and I know that I need to go to the doctor about it. But I'm nervous about them suspecting that I have an ED. So, if anyone has ever gone to their doctor for something similar, what should I expect? I don't want to be upfront about my ED but if I have to in order to figure out what's wrong, I guess I will.
[Discussion] Does anyone else have a nest?
/u/TeaCupGirl [5'8" | CW 124.8lbs | 19 | -15.2lbs |]
Created: Tue Sep 27 11:43:44 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54rshl/does_anyone_else_have_a_nest/
---
By nest, I mean a safe little hole filled with blankets and things you like that you close yourself into when your ed strikes.
Mine is my "kawaii room", a room in my house with my desk and computer, an airbed, my collection of Japanese stuffed animals/my doll collection/tsumtsums/pink everything. Its basically my fortress and there's no place like it when I'm feeling especially triggered.
Do you guys have one? If so what's in it?
[Rant/Rave] aaanddd i want to curl up and die now
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Sep 27 11:40:03 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54rrt0/aaanddd_i_want_to_curl_up_and_die_now/
---
[deleted]
[Thinspo] Thinspo <3
/u/eightstone [Height: 5ft 7 | CW: 9st 12lbs| BMI: 21 | Gender: F]
Created: Tue Sep 27 11:26:43 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54rp8x/thinspo_3/
---
http://imgur.com/gallery/FDMSJ
[Rant/Rave] Does anyone else hate seeing thin people?
/u/Alexa1p [5'5'' | 110 | 18 | -10.7 | F]
Created: Tue Sep 27 11:16:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54rnf0/does_anyone_else_hate_seeing_thin_people/
---
On good days, when I feel good about myself, I love seeing thin girls. They're ultimate thinspo, and it's great. But lately I've been gaining weight and I can't stand to look at thin, pretty girls. They make me feel so big and ugly in comparison. :(
[Rant/Rave] Okay so the one thing i decided to eat today (and yesterday) was pizza
/u/rainbowsunshinedust [5'5 | 108 | 18.18 | GW 95 | F]
Created: Tue Sep 27 10:55:10 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54rjb6/okay_so_the_one_thing_i_decided_to_eat_today_and/
---
I added a slice from yesterday to todays calorie count so that put me at 338 cals. I ate a really big 16" extra cheese slice from my parents fridge (im a fucking failure) today and im hoping thats all it will be. im counting it as 800 calories. So im at 1138. Fuck. Cause I know I'm going to be drinking like a fish later. Hopefully i wont gain. I also have to update my flair cause all my binging has made me gain and it absolutely sucks. I was somehow 108.6 this morning but im going to calculate it at 109.9 because i had to have been dehydrated from all the booze...
[Help] Seeing a new psychologist for the first time today...
/u/xtinytoadx [5'4" | 88 | 15.40 | F]
Created: Tue Sep 27 10:51:23 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54rilr/seeing_a_new_psychologist_for_the_first_time_today/
---
...and I'm freaking out. I'm so bloody nervous and afraid that she'll mention how thin or gaunt I am. I'm seeing her for anxiety and depression but I have no idea what to tell her. I'm so scared that I'm making myself feel sick.
[Discussion] DAE freak out when they can't workout?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Sep 27 10:08:27 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54rar7/dae_freak_out_when_they_cant_workout/
---
[deleted]
[Discussion] Daily Food Diary! September 27, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Tue Sep 27 10:02:14 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54r9mt/daily_food_diary_september_27_2016/
---
This is a daily food diary thread for September 27, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
[Rant/Rave] I love being vegan
/u/elderflower_7 [5'5" | 129 | 21.3 | -11 | F]
Created: Tue Sep 27 10:01:51 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54r9ka/i_love_being_vegan/
---
I've been a vegetarian for ~4 years now and recently went vegan. It's the best :D
* saving the planet
* not contributing to the bio-industry
* feeling a tiny little bit better about myself
* dairy products contain a lot of fat
* so does meat
* it makes it sooo much easier to decline food!! :D
* extra way of restricting myself! "no I can't buy those cookies, even though I don't care about the calories atm, they contain egg"
* I don't get cravings for cheese etc anymore!
* my dad started cooking healthier and really enjoys doing so
* I eat a lot more fruit and veggies
* it seems like my skin is clearing up too
List could go on and on :) just needed to share some positivity
on mobile, can't flair, sorry
[Discussion] Does reading this sub make you binge?
/u/preppy123
Created: Tue Sep 27 09:56:28 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54r8k7/does_reading_this_sub_make_you_binge/
---
Sometimes reading other people recount their binges makes me think I can eat something I shouldn't because all of the skinny people on pro-ed do it. Does that make any sense? I ate way too much on Saturday and when I got on the scale the next day I was like- oh I'm just retaining water, I didn't gain weight. I think I use other people's binges as justification.
[Thinspo] A daily mail article with pictures of Mary-Kate Olsen in a bikini yesterday. Total Thinspo.
/u/TessTobias [5'5" | 120 | 19.7 | -22]
Created: Tue Sep 27 09:54:52 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54r89j/a_daily_mail_article_with_pictures_of_marykate/
---
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-3808613/Mary-Kate-Olsen-parades-enviable-bikini-bod-skimpy-black-two-piece-holiday-France.html
[Tip] What is an appetite suppressant that works for you?
/u/ObservingSilence
Created: Tue Sep 27 09:48:49 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54r75s/what_is_an_appetite_suppressant_that_works_for_you/
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[removed]
[Rant/Rave] I quit coffee and I can not stop being absolutely ravenous.
/u/fishysandwich [5'3.5 | 120 | -25 | F]
Created: Tue Sep 27 09:23:15 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54r2pm/i_quit_coffee_and_i_can_not_stop_being_absolutely/
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I quit solely because i realized coffee really aggravated my anxiety symptoms, and it's really been amazing how much more rational I've been now. However, I can not eat less than 1000 kcals a day without feeling like I'm going to die. I'm just so ravenous all the time and it's frustrating because I want to lose more weight. It's horrible. Sigh. I miss my caffeinated best friend.
[Rant/Rave] I bought these pants in April.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Sep 27 09:12:39 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54r0vb/i_bought_these_pants_in_april/
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http://imgur.com/JP5AJ7s
Just tried an EC stack for the first time...
/u/rmehta96
Created: Tue Sep 27 08:41:31 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54qvlh/just_tried_an_ec_stack_for_the_first_time/
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(No flair bc I'm on mobile, sorry) Should I be adding more caffeine? I've been doing 1 Bronkaid and 150mg caffeine every 4-5 hours as I need it...but I'm not really feeling as good/wired as other people seem to be.
I'm used to taking Adderall and most recently Vyvanse for appetite suppression and stuff and although I'm not hungry, food doesn't disgust me like it does like while i'm in amphetamines. Any advice?
[Rant/Rave] Finally tried laxatives.... here is my TMI recount
/u/HowToBeAsian25 [5'3.5 |113lbs |19.78 |-19 | F]
Created: Tue Sep 27 08:40:27 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54qvft/finally_tried_laxatives_here_is_my_tmi_recount/
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I had a lunch I wasn't proud of yesterday, so when I went shopping that evening for more vitamins I went ahead and threw lax in the cart.
I took the reccomended dose around 6 or 7pm and was surprised that I wasn't immediately shitting my brains out. Because ya know, the movies where they take like 2 bites of their brownie and immediately run for the restroom...
Wake up at 4:30 am with some weird stomach pains happening.. My selective memory conveniently forgot about the part where in the movies they take a bite of brownie then practically double over in pain.
I posted a while back asking about laxatives and almost everyone said to stay away from them if I could. Because not only can it become addictive behavior, but can lead to irregularity from dependency. I promise to use it responsibly guys, it's just nice to have on site for just in case. Plus that was not fun, Idk how people can take it more than once a week!!
[Goal] Halfway to the BMI goal.
/u/ED_Throwaway_ [5f7 | Manatee | -28 | GW 132 | GQ]
Created: Tue Sep 27 08:23:10 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54qsls/halfway_to_the_bmi_goal/
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Still a really long way to go - but I went to a dr's appointment yesterday, and it turns out I'm down almost 30# from my last weigh-in there (in February). It's way slower than I want it to be, but it's a bit of a turning point that maybe I'm starting to get past the BED part of things.
Maybe I'll be able to get a better handle on restriction again sooner than later. I can hope. I miss having the discipline I used to. It's hard with a spouse that only wants to do keto and is super-aware of my ED history.
[Discussion] Any advice for a first time faster?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Sep 27 08:16:38 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54qrk8/any_advice_for_a_first_time_faster/
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[removed]
[Discussion] DAE have a love/hate relationship with their bf/gf/spouse/partner talking about other people that they find attractive?
/u/miss_morticia [5'10" | cw: 146 | gw: 105 | 20.90 | F]
Created: Tue Sep 27 07:52:49 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54qnqu/dae_have_a_lovehate_relationship_with_their/
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I'm not really one for meanspo, but I restrict best when I'm painfully aware of the fact that my husband finds other women attractive. He thinks I'm just super easygoing but it actually really messes with my head when he obviously checks someone out, or says another woman is hot. However, I ask questions that kind of encourage him to keep doing it because nothing fuels my self-loathing like feeling like he could do so much better and I need to step up my game.
Messed up I know lol.
Does anyone else do this sort of thing?
[Meme/Humor] There's "Size does matter" - ad on the sidebar.
/u/Mi__ra [165cm |50 kg | 18.6 | 0 | F]
Created: Tue Sep 27 07:17:07 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54qifa/theres_size_does_matter_ad_on_the_sidebar/
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https://www.reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54qifa/theres_size_does_matter_ad_on_the_sidebar/
[Meme/Humor] Oh GOD something so ironically funny happened.
/u/mandarinexd [5'3" | CW:99 | BMI:17.74 | - 11 lbs | F]
Created: Tue Sep 27 06:25:14 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54qb0d/oh_god_something_so_ironically_funny_happened/
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SORRY TO FLOOD THE SUB but I have to tell someone what happened this morning. So I have a crush on this guy in my art school, and we got a few classes in common. He looks so sweet and nice, and let me tell ya it helps to have crushes as motivation to look good right ? *i was such a fool*
Our convo : we were talking about body image since anthropology class was about beauty standarts through society :
Me : "funny how our perception of beauty changed blahblah"
[me internally looking at him](http://imgur.com/Oz7f54A)
Mister Fine Ass : "yeah ! For example I hate the 90s supermodels look so much, like Kate Moss style etc"
Me , carefree, knowing that anyway I look as much as Kate Moss as a piece of bread looks like a cactus : "oh you don't like the heroin chic look ?"
Him : aha it's just that I don't like skinny chicks, like too thin isn't my thing you know ? I like them curvy ! Even a bit chubby is better !"
[my flat ass at this moment](http://imgur.com/Y5fJHPD)
[Discussion] Self-care and Beauty Q+A September 27, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Tue Sep 27 06:02:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54q7xz/selfcare_and_beauty_qa_september_27_2016/
---
Eating disorders are real, complex, and devastating conditions that can have serious consequences for physical health. Use this thread to discuss harm reduction and beauty tips, plus suggestions on how to build back up the physical self before and after engaging in disordered behaviors.
Please be wary of false advice and information. Be sure to research the facts before taking anyone's advice, no matter who they are. Remember that diagnosing members is unacceptable. **Anyone looking for medical guidance should seek the opinion of a medically licensed professional.**
*****
Self-care and beauty threads are posted every Tuesday.
Have any questions or concerns? Comment below, or [PM the mods.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FproED)
[Meme/Humor] me af :^)
/u/electille [5'7 | 123 | 19.2 | ?]
Created: Tue Sep 27 04:07:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54pvz8/me_af/
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http://imgur.com/rK5JjvZ
[Tip] Caffeine source that isn't just black coffee!
/u/electille [5'7 | 123 | 19.2 | ?]
Created: Tue Sep 27 03:54:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54pup7/caffeine_source_that_isnt_just_black_coffee/
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I drink about 4 cups of black coffee every day, and it gets kinda boring. Sooo, I decided to try Burn Zero, cause it's a different taste and has ~15 cal per big ol can. People here probably know about sugarfree/low cal energy drinks, but I'm so excited about my little "find"!
[Rant/Rave] Having a meltdown which triggered a binge :(
/u/onlyroom_forthin [5'6 | CW:151.4.0 | 24.57 | SW:165 | UGW:120 | F]
Created: Tue Sep 27 03:24:24 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54pry1/having_a_meltdown_which_triggered_a_binge/
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I'm just freaking out about everything, it started because I'm so lost in one of my classes. I'm pretty sure I'm going to fail my midterm next week and I have to have a B for it to count towards my degree. And then I started crying about being alone in a new state, I have literally zero friends. And then I started crying about my cat I put to sleep a few months ago. And now I miss my mom because she would know how to make me calm down. I'm in my twenties, I'm supposed to be an adult, but I still cry over missing my mom and my cat and eating too many cookies.
Two hours later and I've eaten a huge grilled cheese, a bunch of chocolate and cookies, and a ton of milk. I'm 1000 calories in and it's only 3 am. Today is going to be terrible and I haven't even gone to bed yet. :(
[Thinspo] More Instagram/Tumblr thinspo/fitspo [NSFW]
/u/tinylunacat [165cm|60kg|GW:45kg| Female]
Created: Tue Sep 27 01:42:13 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54piz0/more_instagramtumblr_thinspofitspo_nsfw/
---
http://imgur.com/a/912iG
[Goal] Progress from 14 - 18, still so so so far to go
/u/lesbichan [5'4" | 156 | -15 | F]
Created: Tue Sep 27 01:40:26 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54pit1/progress_from_14_18_still_so_so_so_far_to_go/
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https://imgur.com/a/xdKLd
[Rant/Rave] A few notes about life with ED
/u/mandarinexd [5'3" | CW:99 | BMI:17.74 | - 11 lbs | F]
Created: Tue Sep 27 01:05:52 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54pfgq/a_few_notes_about_life_with_ed/
---
I apologize in advance for any mistakes since englih isn't my first language !
- Being thinner doesn't make me feel prettier. Which is completely paradoxal since when I started restricting in order to lose weight, I was doing that to be pretty (now I'm well aware other psychological issues are responsible for that But this superfical part of me is still here) .I realized it's all about self love : even if I was logically at a goal weight, I would never feel like I succeeded in any ways. Because in the end it was never enough : even if I was more confident to wear some outfit , deep down the way i saw myself was still a shapeless blob .
- ED is horrifying because it gaves you a false sense of fulfillment. If you are like me, if you also like to be in control (of your body, of your life , of your appareance etc), ED is addicting. You can control how much you eat, move, sleep, speak, act, all of it to go for your goals. It's so easier to not think about your others personal problems when you have this huge parasite taking all the space in your mind.
- ED isolates. A lot. Because you can't justify forever to your relatives, friends, SO, why you don't want to go out because risks of eating food. You can't explain why a pizza can cause you a panick attack, and counting calories all the time isn't a lifestyle most people understand. Moreover, all the person close to me tell me when I'm deep in my ED, I look sadder, distant, tired all the time. I'm not the best compagny and the worst ? I'm well aware of that.
- ED gives you hope : it's like this little dark voice inside your head which told you "everything is gonna be okay WHEN you will loose weight. Until that moment you are worthless. "
This boy doesn't like me ? Because I'm not skinny enough. I'm not happy and popular ? Because I'm not skinny enough. My parents prefer my sister/brother to me ? It's because they are better than me, I have to lose more to be at their level. Etc
- I forgot how it was like to enjoy food . Really savouring it. I mean, I can have the momentary pleasure of the first bite of a cake, a sushi, or any other "cheat meals", but soon after the guilt and self depreciation is wayy stronger than any pleasure I felt in the first place. Food become numbers to me, calories . It's a weapon which can make me feel bloated, stressed and guilty. I really feel envy for people who geniuely have pleasure to eat food . I wish I could remember this sensation
And it goes on, and on.
[Other] At first I liked this picture, but looking back all I see is fat fat fat :(
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Sep 27 00:47:14 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54pdkf/at_first_i_liked_this_picture_but_looking_back/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/7d97f67f034241ce96b690e91c96f499?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=da21f82aeab605cbd98ff73d8f7e7ec0
[Help] Please please help me
/u/throwaway03199519 [5'6 | CW 114 | GW 110| 18.47| -22| F]
Created: Tue Sep 27 00:37:23 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54pckr/please_please_help_me/
---
[removed]
[Rant/Rave] [rant] Definitely not eating today
/u/EatMyInsides [156cm | CW:49.8kg | BMI: 21.30 | Weight Lost: N/A | Genderfluid]
Created: Tue Sep 27 00:16:04 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54paf2/rant_definitely_not_eating_today/
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My mother is working nights and sometimes I smoke inside the house when she's working (because I can't be bothered going outside because it's super cold). I always make sure she doesn't know about it. But last night I got drunk and didn't clean it up or anything (honestly I'm still drunk because I didn't get much sleep). And when she saw that I had been smoking inside she got pissed at me and yelled at me for it. She didn't care about the empty bottle on the table or anything. So I won't be eating anything today because she made me really upset.
I have to move out as soon as possible...
[Intro] I'm so glad I found this sub
/u/archerofdawn [154cm | CW 161 | GW 90 | -3 | NB]
Created: Mon Sep 26 22:40:07 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54ozbz/im_so_glad_i_found_this_sub/
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Hello! I've only been lurking for a few days but I just wanted to say that it's so nice to find a place that doesn't force recovery on you, is supportive without being judgemental, and where you can find someone who's been through similar things. I feel like I'm in a safe place.
I don't remember a lot of my life because I'm very dissociative, but a good chunk of the moments that I do remember are me feeling self conscious, being the fat friend, the big one, etc., I think it's a pretty common experience; I didn't really have disordered eating until a couple of years ago, though, when I just got so stressed with life I restricted to ~300cal per day. It was liberating. I loved it. Obviously it wasn't good for me, but at least I got to have some say in this aspect of my life.
I 'got better' and then recently my friend group triggered a lot of ED thoughts on top of me not wanting to be seen or acknowledged as having a physical body/occupying space + general social anxiety thoughts, so I'm back to restricting. I want to have numerical proof that even if I'm occupying space, it's minimal and an acceptable volume, that I am presentable, that the clothes I'm wearing don't look unflattering. Like even if I was seen, it wouldn't be too terrible of a thing. I don't know if that really makes sense.
Thanks for reading if you did, I hope I can post/comment every once in a while <3
[Rant/Rave] stupid cycle
/u/prettyhippie
Created: Mon Sep 26 22:27:43 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54oxpl/stupid_cycle/
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i eat and eat and then purge, and immediately after think "oh well now i'm empty i can eat again right?" like whats thee point of that! it pisses me off, what a stupid, vicious, never ending cycle..
[Tip] For those worried about nutrition while keeping calories low (sub 800/day)
/u/Sellout_Chef
Created: Mon Sep 26 22:07:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54ouw4/for_those_worried_about_nutrition_while_keeping/
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This has been my food lately, and I feel stable and pretty good.
2 cups of black tea with 4oz of 2% milk and 2 splenda in each
2 cups of coffee with 2oz half & half and sugarfree syrup in each
1 cup of cinnamon toast crunch w/ 1 cup of 2% milk
1 "century" brand adult multivitamin
4oz (cooked weight) baked chicken, plain
1 packed cup of raw spinach
782 kcalories, 58 grams of complete protein, and well over 100% DV of almost every single vitamin & mineral. This only provides ~56% magnesium and almost no fiber, but if you really care you can supplement those. Potassium & sodium come in at 53% & 27% respectively, which is fine because the ratio is what matters most I'm told. Also, the caffeine is a huge appetite suppressant, so use it to skip breakfast and have a late lunch.
Almost two months like this and I haven't come close to fainting, I usually have energy to work out, and I'm losing tons of weight. I know a lot of you keep way lower than 782 kcal/day, but if anybody wants to get adequate nutrition while not-quite-fasting-but-close, here it is, as low as I could get it.
[Rant/Rave] Thank You 7/11 Employee For Making Me Hate Myself Even More
/u/robertvegetation [5'8 | CW: 115 | GW: 105 | F]
Created: Mon Sep 26 21:34:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54oq2y/thank_you_711_employee_for_making_me_hate_myself/
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Starting out the day with 3 cups of coffee with sugar free creamer then sugar free black cherry jello.
100 cals.
It's all good until I get home and down a pumpkin english muffin and luna cookie dough bar
420 cals
Then waking up from a nap to my mom buying me a chicken quesarito without me asking.
1,040 cals
I give up, go down to 7/11 to binge and buy myself oreo's and mexican coke, leading to a daily grand total of 1,510 cals
Woman checking me out goes "Wow. You're healthy. Not"
Of course it's not healthy, it's a fucking binge.
I can't purge because my parents are home.
Fuck. Everything.
I'm just gonna skip food tomorrow and I wish I could for the rest of my life.
[Discussion] Is it weird that I like to watch cooking shows while I workout?
/u/onlyroom_forthin [5'6 | CW:151.4.0 | 24.57 | SW:165 | UGW:120 | F]
Created: Mon Sep 26 20:37:10 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54ogzk/is_it_weird_that_i_like_to_watch_cooking_shows/
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I used to run but I messed up my knee so I have just been working out at home for 60-90 minutes every night. I've been watching nothing but cooking shows. I don't know why because then when I'm done I eat like an apple or something equally lame, but I LOVE watching them, ESPECIALLY Giada De Laurentiis because she's tiny and adorable. I think it motivates me to burn more calories but sometimes it kind of feels like torture because after I just want to eat some huge cheesy pasta dish, but I feel like I can't so I just eat salad.
[Rant/Rave] Canker Sores
/u/NeverThinEnough [5'4.5" | 98.8 | 16.7 | -29.2 | F]
Created: Mon Sep 26 20:00:11 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54oav9/canker_sores/
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So all thanks to my absolute crap nutrition paired with running out of my multi vitamins and not being able to afford another bottle, my body has rewarded me with three canker sores on the inside of my mouth!!
I'm so happy. Even if I'm hungry, I can't eat. It feels like I'm shoving knives into my mouth if I even try to eat a soft food like bread. Plus, nobody is giving me their usual crap about how I should eat more!! I just turn my lip inside out and show them the disgusting sores on the inside of my lip and they've been backing away after that.
Canker sores, you are the epitome of a blessing in disguise. Thank you. 💕
[Rant/Rave] I'm slipping into old habits again, and I just need to rant
/u/Wildrumpus27317
Created: Mon Sep 26 19:45:14 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54o8i6/im_slipping_into_old_habits_again_and_i_just_need/
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For as long I can remember my reaction to stress is to restrict. And now that I'm busy with school and work again, I have the opportunity to avoid food. But what comes with that is the night-time eating, and the drinking.
I'm going to ruin the best relationship of my life if I don't stop but the thing is, and I think that some of you here will agree with me, ED behaviours are familiar and comfortable. But I've never felt I could go to a docor or therapist or whatever about it, because I wouldn't be taken seriously.
I hope this isn't inappropriate for this sub but I just needed to get this out there.
[Rant/Rave] Damnit. I binged. Fuck.
/u/hazelconner [5'4" | 179.6 | 34.0% BF | -10.4 | X/F]
Created: Mon Sep 26 19:28:18 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54o5oc/damnit_i_binged_fuck/
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I did so well for three weeks and then I came home feeling emotional shitty and kinda physically weak. Aaaand then the food.
So here's to being accountable.
Chinese leftovers rice and chicken with broccoli. (400)
Gyro meat and potato roll (350)
Chocolate covered macadamia nuts (100)
And now I feel like a fat fucking pig. Time to restrict tomorrow!!! I'm going for a new low. 800.
[Help] I'm losing control, and I don't know where to turn.
/u/gazdaman1 [6'0" 18y/old | 153lb | 20.8 | -30lb | M]
Created: Mon Sep 26 18:01:36 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54nrqd/im_losing_control_and_i_dont_know_where_to_turn/
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All throughout my life, I had been that fat kid. I ate for fun, for entertainment, I ate because I had nothing else to do. I was convinced that it was just 'baby fat' and I would eventually lose it, so I saw no problem stuffing my face every day with the unhealthiest food imaginable. Two years ago, for curiosity's sake, I stepped on my bathroom scale and saw the number 195 staring back at me. I was horrified. I couldn't phantom being 200+ pounds and I'd never thought I'd get to that point. Nearly 200 lbs at 5'8”. That day, I downloaded MFP and began the quest for weight loss.
I spend six months restricting and exercising, eating less than 1000 calories a day, walking for miles in freezing weather with nothing but shorts and a thin t-shirt. I did everything in my power to lose weight. And as I restricted more and more, I felt this amazing sense of control take over. I was losing weight so quickly, and I only had myself to thank. As the weight fell off, I began getting compliments, girls started flirting with me, and my self esteem was at the highest that it had ever been. In six months, I dropped 55 pounds, nearly a third of my body weight. Instead of 200, the scale showed a new number, 135. That day, was the happiest I have ever been.
For about a year, I sat at 135, no longer tracking calories or macros. Due to healthier habits, I was able to keep my weight steady, and I maintained with little to no effort. I rarely gave thought to what I was eating; I ate what was available until I was full, and I put the rest away. It was freeing being that likable, social, skinny kid. For the first time, I loved who I was: someone who's life didn't revolve around food.
Six months ago, a switch flipped inside me. That carefree attitude towards food, calories, and nutrition disappeared. This nagging voice, a voice obsessing about food, suddenly occupied my brain. Every second of every day was filled with thoughts about eating and food. Within the span of a few months, I gained 30 pounds. I fought against it, with every ounce of my willpower, but this constant metal battle wore me down, while the voice grew louder.
Currently, I stand at 150 lbs, losing 15 lbs since the initial gain 6 months ago, but this fixation on food is getting worse. I'm in college, meaning I have no control over what food I get to eat (the school forces us to eat the majority of our meals at a buffet styled cafeteria), and I've started to slip again.
I've been over the day where the obsessive thoughts started a million times in my head, but I've come up with nothing. No trigger, to traumatic event, nothing happened that day that would explain this behavior. I'm desperate to figure out what changed, before I inevitably gain weight again, and spiral into the depressive, introverted, fat, past version of myself. I need to find that willpower again that enabled me to lose that massive quantity of weight two years ago. But it's gone. I'm losing control, but I don't know where to turn.
I don't know where I'm going with this post, but this sub is the only support system I have right now. I just need to write this out, put my feelings into words, and share it with someone. Sorry for the long post. Thanks for reading.
[Help] Once again looking for recipes
/u/Casablanca_Insomnia [5'3 | 102 | 18.63 | -21 | F]
Created: Mon Sep 26 17:43:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54nopj/once_again_looking_for_recipes/
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We cook for each other one night a week at my flat and it always makes me nervous. Does anyone have any low cal recipes that look bulky or filling so I can try keep under my calorie limit. We'e all veggie if that helps in any way.
[Discussion] Phantom scents?
/u/c_marier [5'6"| 112 | 18.1 | -13 | 22F]
Created: Mon Sep 26 17:23:38 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54nlgx/phantom_scents/
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Anyone else get this? I'll be chilling out at my desk at work or at home or walking to my car and all of a sudden get hit with this super strong, super specific scent - bam! - fruit loops, warm biscuits with melted butter, canned frosting, chicken noodle soup. I've mentioned it once or twice to people I'm with and no one else smells it. I think my brain is glitching and trying to get me to think about food even more than I already do :P
[Rant/Rave] Does anyone else feel sad they can't talk to anyone about it?
/u/churrodonut
Created: Mon Sep 26 17:08:59 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54nj1b/does_anyone_else_feel_sad_they_cant_talk_to/
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I never thought I'd find myself on a proED board, but I've been restricting my calories the last two months. It started off with making a goal of only 1200 calories a day to lose weight. Now, I feel at my best when I come under, and the more days I can come in under and the lower I can go, the better I feel.
I've gotten to a point now where I can fast an entire day, and I love it. It's taking it's toll on school though. I am so behind on homework because I am tired all the time. I don't feel tired, but I can't seem to control my brain. I already have ADHD, and I know this isn't helping.
And some days, I want to complain about it, but I can't because I have to hide the fact that I am restricting my calories so much. I know if my boyfriend or my friends find out, they're going to make me get help. My boyfriend will especially force me to get help.
I am also ashamed because I have been having really bad mental health the last two years. I've been suicidal, and I've had a few public breakdowns. I don't want to seem even more crazy or even more of a hassle.
I don't even know why I feel the need to talk about it. I think I just want support. I want someone to help me get through my homework when I am tired. I want someone to tell me it's bad when I accidentally eat bad foods and keep me from ordering them again.
[Rant/Rave] Broke up with boyfriend. Coincidentially, also lowest adult weight. I'm so empty in both good and bad ways
/u/apricaught [5'3.5"| CW 116.8 |LW 114.2| 20.85| -16| F]
Created: Mon Sep 26 16:55:30 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54ngqn/broke_up_with_boyfriend_coincidentially_also/
---
I feel purposeless. Like I have nobody I can truly rely on anymore. I have people who will probably support me and hang out with me if I explicitly ask them to, but nobody who cares enough to reach out to me. I thought I was going to marry him, that he'd be the consistent thing in my life, so I kind of let everything else fade away. Big mistake.
But I'm finally in the 19 BMI (by the old BMI, and I'm short so I have to use new, so whatever). I started losing weight as a way to feel good about myself. To feel like a bombshell. Now it's the only reward system I have. And even at my lowest weight, it wasn't enough to make my relationship work. There's no getting around my personality. I only even cooked because it made my boyfriend happy. Now I'm eating a bag of brussels sprouts, plain, just to subsist enough to study. Grades and weight. That's all there is now.
[Rant/Rave] He triggers me so much
/u/Indigobeet [162cm | 62kg | 24.3 | 0 | F]
Created: Mon Sep 26 16:25:52 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54nbm6/he_triggers_me_so_much/
---
I just want to vent.
The other day my fwb was over and was talking about this girl he wants to sleep with. Apparently, she's "tiny" with huge breasts. Apparently she's 45-50 kg. Apparently he's jealous of her having a fwb. What he said has been running through my mind over and over every time I feel hungry, and I have kept sub 500 calories along with walking 8-10 miles daily. Half of my 500 calories are from alcohol.
The saddest part: I fucking love this.
[Thinspo] New Tumblr
/u/Ultimatedream [5'6 | 130 | 21 | -35 | F]
Created: Mon Sep 26 16:25:27 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54nbjf/new_tumblr/
---
As some of you might know, my Tumblr was terminated a few weeks ago. People from this sub followed me, so I wanted to let you know that I decided to start over (again, haha).
http://ultimatedream.tumblr.com/
I also followed a few people from here and I really need a whole bunch to follow again! Post your Tumblr (or any good thinspo tumblrs) here. If your Tumblr is personal, you can also PM me.
If you didn't knew my previous Tumblr, I basically post/reblog colorful thinspo only and avoid everything with food in it.
[Rant/Rave] I fucking hate peanut butter
/u/rawtruism
Created: Mon Sep 26 16:03:49 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54n7ob/i_fucking_hate_peanut_butter/
---
I usually watch recipe videos and food vlogs just because.. You know, the whole being obsessed with food and all. I ate A LOT today already (MFP said I ate just under 1000 kcal) but then.. idk, something just clicked in my brain, probably because I stumbled upon a recipe for coffee cake, and I just.. Half-binged on dark chocolate and peanut butter. Which lead to eating one of the sandwiches had for this week's lunches.
I honestly can't believe I did that. I feel so sick. Who the fuck just eats peanut butter. Who the fuck just HAS actual peanut butter and CHOCOLATE just lying around? I'm so angry. I knew I couldn't control myself around peanut butter (for some unknown reason. It isn't even that tasty) and I still bought it. I'm really angry with myself. I've eaten at least between 1600-1800 kcal today if not even 2000. I can't bring myself to even estimate.
Everything feels like a roller coaster. Like one day I'm doing great, and the next I'm a pig. Idk I just wanted to rant. I guess I'll do better tomorrow.
[Thinspo] New tomboyish/andro thinspo album :) [NSFW]
/u/elderflower_7 [5'5" | 129 | 21.3 | -11 | F]
Created: Mon Sep 26 15:34:37 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54n2hq/new_tomboyishandro_thinspo_album_nsfw/
---
http://imgur.com/a/y3LAq
[Other] Dangerous curves ahead! Reach for a pickle instead of a pie!
/u/smokesanddietcokes [Doesn't actually know what she's talking about.]
Created: Mon Sep 26 15:32:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54n25z/dangerous_curves_ahead_reach_for_a_pickle_instead/
---
https://youtu.be/F48fodGxaHE
[Rant/Rave] Vent what annoys you in regards to ED
/u/foodfornot [5'3" | 120lbs | BMI 21.3 | -20 | GW 105 | F]
Created: Mon Sep 26 15:24:03 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54n0j2/vent_what_annoys_you_in_regards_to_ed/
---
I've only ever told one person about my disordered eating and she now confides in me about what she considers her being "so bad" and "bingeing." Today she confessed that she ate 6 slices of pizza after getting drunk and said she figured I would understand the guilt and I do but.... 6 slices?!
Girrlllll try eating two whole pizzas bc Papa John's had a buy one get one and you're home alone, washing it down with an old freezer-burnt tub of shitty Breyer's ice cream mixed with peanut butter, a 4 pack of yogurt, finishing literally every box of cereal in your apartment with water bc you are low on milk, and regretfully finding the stash of special candies from Sweden your bf was saving for your anniversary. THEN come see me. I'm only an average weight bc I starve myself when not bingeing -- don't get it twisted, your "binges" are not the same! (no flair on mobile, sorry)
[Rant/Rave] Massive binge from work stress and I can't even bring myself to purge
/u/sunrisesomeday [5'6.5" | 141lb | UGW:105lb | yo-yo queen]
Created: Mon Sep 26 15:09:13 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54mxuf/massive_binge_from_work_stress_and_i_cant_even/
---
I've been so good recently and haven't binged in over a month. But today I reached the end of my rope at work and went off the deep end at my boss. I've really been struggling for the past few months with hating my job because of my incompetent boss undermining all of my work. If I worked in any other industry I'd have been sacked based on what I said to (well, shouted at) my boss today, but he needs me too much to get rid of me.
Cue panic attack about how I should have just went into a normal, stable job after uni like finance or consulting (I work in a super specific field and new jobs are hard to come by). Which, of course, leads to a 2500 calorie binge.
Yes, the perfect thing to do while feeling like shit about myself is to make myself feel even shittier about myself. Thanks Brain, that's super logical of you to do.
I can't even bring myself to purge it up, and in a bizarre way I want to punish myself for making such poor choices career wise by keeping it down. Which is crazy, but I suppose I've never claimed not to be. I haven't hated myself this much in a long time.
Though tomorrow morning I'm not sure what I'll be dreading more- the daily weigh in or going into work.
I just want to crawl into my bed and never wake up at this point.
[Goal] I've gained so much weight that i'm using last years progress pics as thinspo :(
/u/thebassistooloud [178cm | 160 | 20.3 | +20 | F]
Created: Mon Sep 26 14:31:31 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54mqs9/ive_gained_so_much_weight_that_im_using_last/
---
http://imgur.com/a/UxMFa
anyone wanna be fasting buddies?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Sep 26 14:19:52 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54mohx/anyone_wanna_be_fasting_buddies/
---
[removed]
[Rant/Rave] It's been a long time
/u/rainbowsunshinedust [5'5 | 108 | 18.18 | GW 95 | F]
Created: Mon Sep 26 14:16:45 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54mnv8/its_been_a_long_time/
---
I've missed yall and your motivation and support so much. I really don't have anyone who can relate to this except one of my friends that I'm pretty sure is in recovery. I decided to let myself go over the past 3 months after my break up and being with my awesome friends that eat so damn much lol I've gained so much body fat. Its so hard for me to look at myself right now and I have such a terrible body. No definite curves just a tummy and a flat chest. I hate it and I haven't felt comfortable looking at myself naked in forever. I can't quit my alcohol habit, and I know it's not helping, but it's all I have in a sea of self doubt and no control. I just have to get back on track. Safe foods. Restricting. No more b/p with mostly just the b. Lol I need this for my sanity. Just wanted to rant. You are all so lovely and I hope everyone has been feeling as alright as yall possibly can <3 now its time to bottoms up, I'm off work and I'm only 700 kcal in today after my bingey shitty weekend.
[Thinspo] A little thinspo to end the day
/u/eightstone [Height: 5ft 7 | CW: 9st 12lbs| BMI: 21 | Gender: F]
Created: Mon Sep 26 14:09:00 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54mmek/a_little_thinspo_to_end_the_day/
---
http://imgur.com/gallery/XxSnl
[Help] How do you cope with emotional eating?
/u/deanhipchester [5' | 115.2 lbs | 23.69 | -27.4 lbs | F]
Created: Mon Sep 26 14:08:25 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54mmak/how_do_you_cope_with_emotional_eating/
---
I wanted to fast today but I'm already at 1130 cals and I know it's because I'm upset by the results I'll receive on this internship interview (I fucked up pretty badly and I'll be in another city w/ kids I know made it when we receive the results).
I don't know. How do you guys deal with it? I'm just so sad and I feel like a failure. Everyone says we're not numbers but to me I am?? my worth is dependent on the number of my marks and the number on the scale.
Sorry this is rambly.
[Help] Low-calorie soup recipes/how-to's?
/u/itsybitsyelephant [5'2 | CW 118 | GW 105]
Created: Mon Sep 26 12:45:59 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54m6da/lowcalorie_soup_recipeshowtos/
---
I'd like to make a low-calorie soup without using meats, potato, oils (too calorie dense). I've never made a soup before in my life and am actually sorta scared. I have a pressure cooker and a slow cooker (is this where you make soups?)
In my kitchen at the moment I have celery, tomato, carrots, onion, different spices/seasonings, salt, pepper, things like that. I'd like to make it an only veggie soup. I can get more ingredients if needed!
Hot water really fills me up and soup always leaves me feeling great. Am I hopeless? What are your soup recipes?
[Rant/Rave] Most embarrassing/disgusting thing happened this morning... (gross warning)
/u/jippityjuniper [5'7" | 148 | 23.10 | -20 | F]
Created: Mon Sep 26 11:47:10 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54lv5t/most_embarrassingdisgusting_thing_happened_this/
---
Ugh. I'm so embarrassed but I just feel like I need to share this somewhere with people that will understand my horror at this.
Today started out kinda okay and then my emotions/anxiety got the better of me and I felt the need to b/p for whatever reason. Made some noodles w/veggie meatballs (why I decided this would be good to b/p idk) and scarfed it down then proceeded to get in the shower where I do most of my purging. Everything was fine and dandy until I noticed something...the tub was filling up with water! Cue me starting to panic because both of my parents are home. Not knowing what else to do, and with the tub slowly filling, I shoved my hand as far down the drain as it could go in hopes to somehow loosen the clog.
It. Wasn't. Working.
So there I am, kneeling in pukey water with chunks of vomit around me close to tears as I'm trying like hell to get this goddamn clog out when finally I hear the tell-tale sign of a clear drain and the water starts to go down again. I sat on the floor of the tub for awhile until I calmed down then proceeded with my shower.
This was literally my worst fear. I can't imagine what my parents would do if I had to tell them I clogged the drain because of purging. Thankfully the clog went on its own but this has me scared to ever purge in the shower again. More of a reason I guess for me to get my shit together and start restricting again...
Thanks for reading, and I hope everyone else is having a much better day than I am.
[Goal] Need to protein fast again..
/u/throwawaynm88 [Height 5'3.5"| CW 114.6 lbs| BMI 20| SW 125 lbs| GW 100 lbs]
Created: Mon Sep 26 11:37:59 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54ltet/need_to_protein_fast_again/
---
I lost 10 lbs from 124-114 through only drinking protein shakes for 2 weeks.. I've been trying to eat more calories to maintain and have been binging more often but still maintained my weight at 115. I want to do another fast but I have none of the will power I had when I did it the first time.. I need to get that back somehow. :/
[Rant/Rave] I don't even know what i'm doing anymore.
/u/butterflyjellyfish [5'8" | 160 | 24.3 | 14 lbs | F]
Created: Mon Sep 26 11:31:37 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54ls4f/i_dont_even_know_what_im_doing_anymore/
---
I'm the heaviest I've EVER been. I'm almost 180 pounds, and I feel like a Pregnant Hippopotamus. I keep eating, and I just don't know why. I had a super successful period of almost 7 months of restricting and EVERYBODY commented on how awesome and healthy and thin and ATHLETIC I looked. And then I got a job at a greasy diner and I just sat around and ate food and I got more and more disgusting. I stuff my face with food, and before I know it I've eaten everything in the house, then it's trips to McDonalds or other fast food
buy one get one free?
Better buy two.
What have I become? What have I done to myself? My skin is terrible my body feels like it doesn't belong to me anymore, what am I DOING?
I'm getting back in control, I've picked up Ephedrine and caffeine pills from the pharmacy, and I'm gonna kick myself into gear and get my body back together. I'm nearing the end of a 24 hour (almost accidental) fast, and I can feel the buzzing in my head that means I'm doing the right thing, and it feels like I'm coming back to life, like I'm back where I belong.
[Thinspo] Daily thinspo. 💕
/u/BlackGirlSteeze
Created: Mon Sep 26 11:29:19 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54lro1/daily_thinspo/
---
https://i.reddituploads.com/e6ed5c552eac41d0b508c5d050787c4b?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=2bdc01ce5fdf0cc6c3b87d648589d148
[Thinspo] Last year's prom to this year's homecoming
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Sep 26 11:03:10 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54lmru/last_years_prom_to_this_years_homecoming/
---
https://imgur.com/gallery/yRsSr
[Help] Is it possible to gain 2 pounds over a weekend?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Sep 26 10:50:48 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54lken/is_it_possible_to_gain_2_pounds_over_a_weekend/
---
[deleted]
[Goal] It's not all bad. I think I redeemed myself
/u/DenyMyHunger [5'7"| Fat! | UGW:112| F]
Created: Mon Sep 26 10:20:11 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54leiv/its_not_all_bad_i_think_i_redeemed_myself/
---
I just realised after posting a very drunk and very emotional post about drinking way too much and going over my calories because my friends didn't turn up that I was actually so drunk I didn't eat at all on Saturday. Back on track with 800 calorie days. Every cloud lol
[Help] Am i just a massive weirdo?
/u/AhWaWaaWaaa
Created: Mon Sep 26 10:18:07 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54le53/am_i_just_a_massive_weirdo/
---
So basically long story short i hate eating, feel hungry = feel sick, go to eat = feel sick, digesting = feel sick. I cannot escape this consistent sick feeling.
I recently went tot he docs and his response "oh odd" and prescribed me Mirtazapine which i took for about a week but started to feel really weird and started locking myself in my room.
I smoke cannabis and thought this was the cause of this weird feeling i was getting but 1 night i stopped all together and woke up with possibly the worst migraine ive ever experienced and since then i feel smoking was keeping the head pain away. I have stopped the Mirtazapine and feel better since not taking that but the only problem is one of the effects of it is increased appetite. Now this would be great if feeling hungry didnt make me feel sick and so on. So now my head feels spun and my eating is way worse than previously visiting the doctor.
I feel alone and no idea what to do my moms run out of ways to help to the point she just kinda respions "ok" to what i explain to her and i feel the doctors have no idea what to do with me either.
I just feel overly fucked up and not sure what to do with myself. Locking myself away is not the answer but its the path im taking.
This post might just be a load of gibberish but i need to voice these things somewhere before i go insane.
Thanks for reading if your there.
[Other] My leg today made me happy and sad... Happy that I'm gaining definition but sad that it makes my fat more noticeable
/u/chocolatecoveredpugs [5'4| 118| 20.6 | -22lbs | F]
Created: Mon Sep 26 10:14:45 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54ldio/my_leg_today_made_me_happy_and_sad_happy_that_im/
---
http://imgur.com/3gH3ZLZ
[Rant/Rave] My friend that I confide in says to stop playing the victim.
/u/H2OandCaffeine [5ft7 | FAT | -20 lbs | F]
Created: Mon Sep 26 10:12:50 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54ld5l/my_friend_that_i_confide_in_says_to_stop_playing/
---
And that really hurts. He doesn't know what this stuff is like. It feels like I don't have anywhere to turn with my two friends I confide in pushing recovery at me. And now one is just saying he's sick of me always talking about food. Guess i can't talk to him any more. *shrug* the other pushes recovery like crazy. I just wanted someone to listen and not judge me. Someone to understand what I'm going through and not tell me that I'm doing it to myself and it's all my fault. I just wanted acceptance. And I'm finding it less and less with my support network. And he is making it clear I'm a nuisance. Which sucks cause we are considering a relationship.
[Discussion] Daily Food Diary! September 26, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Mon Sep 26 10:02:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54lb98/daily_food_diary_september_26_2016/
---
This is a daily food diary thread for September 26, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
[Discussion] Looks like a lot of us had a vengeful, bingeful weekend!
/u/citrus_cunt [5' 9"| 139lbs | 19.5| +2lbs | F]
Created: Mon Sep 26 09:33:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54l5ry/looks_like_a_lot_of_us_had_a_vengeful_bingeful/
---
I'm sending all my love out to y'all and may the recovery from the binges be an easy one ♡♡
I'm going to try and restrict below 500 for the next few days and cut out carbs if anyone wants to join me. It'll be hard since the binge fucked up my hunger cues but whatever :)
[Goal] Bingeful weekend. Guess I'm off food for a while.
/u/gastastic [5'1 | 122 | 26F]
Created: Mon Sep 26 09:06:50 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54l0va/bingeful_weekend_guess_im_off_food_for_a_while/
---
I hate when I do this! Do well during the week and fuck it all up by eating like shit for two days. Time to hold myself accountable. I will not eat until I'm under 119. 🙆
[Help] Over eating when I'm on my period
/u/lowkeydeadinside
Created: Mon Sep 26 08:54:19 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54kym2/over_eating_when_im_on_my_period/
---
Does anyone else have this problem? My appetite has gone downhill the past week or so and I lost like 7 pounds but then I got my period and I've been eating junk all day. I feel so disgusting
[Thinspo] Kpop thinspo - BlackPink's "Boombayah" dance practice. Jennie (crop top) is all my goals.
/u/ppyeoreul-mudgosipeo [5'6 | 166.6 | BMI 26.9 | F | GW 112]
Created: Mon Sep 26 08:48:21 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54kxkv/kpop_thinspo_blackpinks_boombayah_dance_practice/
---
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ivoS3HUJB3Q
[Rant/Rave] Trying so hard not to binge. It's only 10:30 am but I can feel that I'm going to be fighting my hunger all day long.
/u/itsybitsyelephant [5'2 | CW 118 | GW 105]
Created: Mon Sep 26 08:34:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54kv9q/trying_so_hard_not_to_binge_its_only_1030_am_but/
---
Coffee is not helping much. Trying to fill myself up with liquids and I'm feeling sorta better.
EDIT: Immediately after posting here, I'm feeling a lot better. I love the feeling of an empty stomach. This really shows how much of a binge is mental and not actually physical hunger. Wowowow.
[Other] Today has been pretty good
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Sep 26 08:11:05 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54kr5d/today_has_been_pretty_good/
---
[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] Plateauing
/u/matchstick_mind [5'0 | CW: 96.4lbs | GW: 84lbs | BMI: 19.83 | 21/F]
Created: Mon Sep 26 07:52:53 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54ko2s/plateauing/
---
So I've been consistently eating at or around 800 calories for the past week. Starting a couple days ago, it was 665 calories. Yet when I went to weigh in today, I had only lost .8 of a pound. Usually, I lose two a week.
I freaked out. I reset my scale. Still 97. Tried another scale 97.5!!! Tried yet another scale, 94. What gives?? They were all on the same surface. I'd gone to the bathroom beforehand (granted my bowel movements are next to nonexistent). Tried my own scale again, but still 97.
I'll admit I had a bit of a panic attack, curled up right there on the floor. I know it's probably just water weight, or I've hit a plateau, but shit like this makes me really not want to eat at all. But my SO's treating me out to sushi tonight and I don't want to disappoint him.
EC stack and blood work?
/u/Randomusername2233 [5'6" |148 | 22.6 | 21.4 | F]
Created: Mon Sep 26 07:50:34 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54knr2/ec_stack_and_blood_work/
---
Hi! Sorry, on mobile so no flair. I just had my yearly physical and I need to get some blood work done, specifically testing blood sugar, cholesterol and vitamin D levels. My question is, will taking an EC stack effect my blood work at all? Should I not take it the day before? For reference, I take 1 primatene and 100mg caffeine two to three times a day.
[Discussion] Weekly Stats Update! September 26, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Mon Sep 26 06:03:35 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54k8j0/weekly_stats_update_september_26_2016/
---
This is the weekly status thread for September 26, 2016.
The weekly status thread is to help motivate our users, and to eventually see how far they've come! Be it for weight loss, weight gain, or maintaining- everyone is welcome. Previous updates are archived [here.](http://www.reddit.com/r/proED/wiki/archives)
Please include the following information (with all necessary units of measurement):
* Height:
* Current weight (CW):
* Highest weight (HW):
* Lowest weight (LW):
* Goal weight (GW):
* Ultimate goal weight (UGW):
* Weight lost (WL):
* BMI: ([Use this to calculate your BMI](https://people.maths.ox.ac.uk/trefethen/bmi_calc.html))
* Age:
* Gender expression:
Here's a handy-dandy copy/paste of the above format:
* Height:
* CW:
* HW:
* LW:
* GW:
* UGW:
* WL:
* BMI:
* Age:
* Gender expression:
*****
Status threads are posted every Monday.
Have any questions or concerns? Comment below, or [PM the mods.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FproED)
[Help] Thinking of doing a 10 day detox, sort of
/u/EatMyInsides [156cm | CW:49.8kg | BMI: 21.30 | Weight Lost: N/A | Genderfluid]
Created: Mon Sep 26 05:43:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54k6bk/thinking_of_doing_a_10_day_detox_sort_of/
---
[removed]
[Thinspo] Weird.
/u/kpatable [5'9" | 124.6 | 18.1/18.4 | -22.4 | F]
Created: Mon Sep 26 05:28:19 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54k4ik/weird/
---
http://imgur.com/7PjYwL8
[Tip] I made this nutrious burrito in a bowl!
/u/Trynabeskinny
Created: Mon Sep 26 02:13:04 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54jm0q/i_made_this_nutrious_burrito_in_a_bowl/
---
http://imgur.com/FFOxluJ
[Rant/Rave] I'm going out now to buy a scale.
/u/aerienne [5'5" | 138 | 23.2 | -32 | F]
Created: Mon Sep 26 01:16:35 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54jh02/im_going_out_now_to_buy_a_scale/
---
Edit: My card was declined because someone tried to spend $1500 at Hautelook and it wasn't me. Damn it. Had to order a new card, so scale is postponed until next week.
I've been without a scale for about 6 weeks now. It hasn't been a good year since about March where I received some devastating news. I hit a new LW when I got the news, but you can imagine my weight plateaued and then went up a bit. I tried to eat 'normally' and go by how my clothes feel, but I don't wear anything that isn't slouchy or has a bit of stretch to it. So it makes it hard to tell if I've really gained or lost. I get bloated and my stomach gets upset very easily, so I can't tell based on my stomach either. Long story short, a scale is important and has a proven record of keeping me on track.
I'm anxious to step on the scale but I know that I need to. I'm writing out a few things just to get them out of my head:
* I need a scale because I can't count the calories at dinner and need to ensure I stay on track. I can skip breakfast and restrict at lunch, but dinner is the place where everything can fall apart.
* If I don't want to step on the scale, that means I probably need to step on the scale.
* Fall and winter mean layers and bundling up. Perfect time to restrict to warm liquids and lose weight without people noticing as much.
* Just over 3 months left in the year. 14 weeks. At a bare minimum of the ~normal~ one pound per week, that's at least 14 pounds down by New Year's.
* The scale let's me know I'm making progress even when my clothes and mirror don't.
* Hitting goal weights is a great way to track progress and set visual goals. Who doesn't love a list of weights with all the numbers crossed off as you hit them? It makes it a game.
Sorry for the long post. I'm just very anxious about stepping on the scale. But I know I just need to do it. The longer I wait, the worse it'll get. I'll already prepared myself for the very worst, so I'm ready for anything.
[Goal] How do you plan on reaching your goal weight?
/u/p5ychdelight
Created: Mon Sep 26 01:00:30 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54jffe/how_do_you_plan_on_reaching_your_goal_weight/
---
[removed]
[Help] I thought I was over this...
/u/epontelier [5'7" | 130 | 20.29 | F]
Created: Mon Sep 26 00:09:26 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54jam2/i_thought_i_was_over_this/
---
I sent a sexy pic to my boyfriend and the only thing he replied was "lol food baby."
I feel guilty that I freaked out at his comment because I know it was just a joke and I know *objectively* I'm not fat.
My body image is just so bad. And I was just almost getting to a place where I felt okay about eating more. I feel like this set me back. I'm not going to eat tomorrow.
[Help] Out of control bingeing after reaching a goal
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Sep 25 23:56:50 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54j99m/out_of_control_bingeing_after_reaching_a_goal/
---
[deleted]
[Other] ~25 inch waist, ~127lbs, reference for when i lose even more ;)
/u/electille [5'7 | 123 | 19.2 | ?]
Created: Sun Sep 25 23:50:28 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54j8n5/25_inch_waist_127lbs_reference_for_when_i_lose/
---
http://imgur.com/tboiWKF
[Rant/Rave] Bad binge day
/u/goldenjuicebox
Created: Sun Sep 25 23:22:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54j5nq/bad_binge_day/
---
I was doing great all day because I went home for the weekend but when I got back to school I went to the dining hall and there went 1500 cals on pizza and cookies and garbage.
Now I feel like garbage.
Ugh.
[Other] artist illustrates mental health disorders through typography - AN and BN included in this short gallery
/u/needsthoserockets [5'55 | 108 lb | BMI 18 | 21F]
Created: Sun Sep 25 23:22:47 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54j5n4/artist_illustrates_mental_health_disorders/
---
http://culturenlifestyle.com/post/150534553726/20-health-disorders-illustrated-through-typography
[Thinspo] Thinspo found on r/oldschoolschool. that waist though!
/u/literallytoki [5'2in | 143lbs | 27% | -2lbs | NB]
Created: Sun Sep 25 23:16:37 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54j4yn/thinspo_found_on_roldschoolschool_that_waist/
---
https://i.reddituploads.com/a294e54cf0a741bcae0dd10d469c7ac8?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=6a0662f1c8be1e7b5fa0e76ca9efba86
[Help] How to get myself out of an almost week long binge (disgusting I know)?
/u/cthulu1221
Created: Sun Sep 25 23:15:33 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54j4ud/how_to_get_myself_out_of_an_almost_week_long/
---
I've been taking adderall forever mainly to kill my appetite, unfortunately I've also started abusing it a bit and have built up my tolerance. So this month I ran out early and my appetite came back in full force, I've been eating ridiculous amounts of food everyday and I feel so gross. Every morning I keep telling myself I'm not going to keep eating like shit but I just end up doing it again. How do I break this pattern until I refill my prescription again (thank god in a couple days) and does anyone have any tips for not abusing their prescription? I don't want this to happen again I feel like a beached whale. I'm sure it's impossible but I feel like I've gained 20 lbs in the last 5 days, sorry I'm rambling I'm sort of freaking out.
[Rant/Rave] Food rant. Figured you guys would understand.
/u/Casablanca_Insomnia [5'3 | 102 | 18.63 | -21 | F]
Created: Sun Sep 25 22:46:17 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54j1e4/food_rant_figured_you_guys_would_understand/
---
I am so completely sick of being utterly food obsessed. I love food, food makes me happy and I genuinely enjoy eating but for some bizarre reason I cant. I read cookbooks constantly, I watch those videos on youtube of people eating and I will happily sit there and watch my flatmates prepare their food. Cooking and baking is amazing and I love making food for other people but again, I won't eat anything I prepare. My whole day is based around when and what I can eat.
Sorry for the wall of nonsensical text but I was hoping someone here would understand. I binged late last night and I feel terrible.
[Goal] Normally I just wax my arms but I decided to also go for the legs. I was able to wrap the wax strip around my wrist, not sure why but I love the feeling of things that are tight on my wrists.
/u/RedBull7 [5'7" | CW: 135 lbs | BMI: 21.45 | 5 lbs | M]
Created: Sun Sep 25 21:31:04 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54iru1/normally_i_just_wax_my_arms_but_i_decided_to_also/
---
http://imgur.com/a/uL5am
[Help] Dealing with family dinners?
/u/allquiets [5'1.5 | 138 | 26.68 | -6 | 85 | GNC]
Created: Sun Sep 25 21:12:19 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54ip9d/dealing_with_family_dinners/
---
As the title says. I know a lot of you are older/independent so it may not be relevant to you, but I'm 17 and still living with my family, and I don't know how to handle family dinners. We typically eat 'buffet style' I guess, with several dishes that we all serve ourselves from.
For me this sort of thing triggers a binge, like it did tonight. I need small, limited portions, of inconvenient food that I don't really enjoy. It stresses me out so much, but skipping out on dinners due to feeling sick/homework has stopped working. My mom and I almost got into a screaming fit because I didn't feel like eating with them. I don't know how to explain cooking myself a separate meal without giving myself away entirely. Any suggestions would be much appreciated! <3
Goodnight. 💕
/u/BlackGirlSteeze
Created: Sun Sep 25 20:57:44 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54in85/goodnight/
---
[removed]
[Rant/Rave] Being cold makes me happy
/u/abraddon
Created: Sun Sep 25 20:28:28 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54ij06/being_cold_makes_me_happy/
---
I'm on mobile so I can't flair, sorry.
It's finally starting to cool off here, not enough that any one else has noticed I guess. My whole family has been complaining that it's so hot. It gives me some strange sense of joy when they're all sweating and I'm shivering. It was so satisfying when that boy told me my fingers felt like ice and gave me his sweater to put on over my flannel and leather jacket, yet I was still freezing. I don't know why I'm like this. I guess I'm taking it as a sign that maybe I've lost more than I thought since being out of the hospital. I've never been this cold, or satisfied.
[Rant/Rave] [rant] I thought I was doing so well! :(
/u/Raspberry_Pancake
Created: Sun Sep 25 20:21:53 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54ii2b/rant_i_thought_i_was_doing_so_well/
---
...until I logged my calories on mfp.
I tend to be on the generous side when counting calories just to be safe. Today I planned to eat quite minimal (although I am sick so I allowed myself a bit more than my usual restrict days)
I didn't eat anything until 6pm, in which I had a roasted chicken drumstick and some fries. I also had a chocolate bar.
Here's where I fucked up. Around 10pm I started getting severe hunger pangs and thought, I'll just whip up a quick instant noodle. So I did just that. I also had thre tablespoons of ice cream. It was an eastern European brand which I couldn't remember the name so I just logged whatever.
My total calories amounted to 1,200. WHAT THE FUCK. I checked back quickly on what I eat and found thst the noodles were 450 cals fml
Sigh I guess I try again tomorrow
[Rant/Rave] I'm so proud of myself right now, I have to remember this moment
/u/Thunder2WonderThighs
Created: Sun Sep 25 19:04:36 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54i6dx/im_so_proud_of_myself_right_now_i_have_to/
---
I never thought I'd see the day where I'd walk all the way to the grocery store, pick out the array of binge foods that I'd been fantasizing about for hours and then put it all back and leave the store.
I'm writing this so I can come back and remember how proud, triumphant and RFELIEVED I felt walking back through my front door without any food, knowing that I stopped myself from eating over 1,000 calories. I can keep moving and not have to dig myself out of a fucking hole this is the fucking best!!!
None of my clothes fit but still feeling like a sack of shit. Plateauing at 133.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Sep 25 16:18:12 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54hgq7/none_of_my_clothes_fit_but_still_feeling_like_a/
---
http://imgur.com/a/F4bOA
[Rant/Rave] Ugh.
/u/BlackGirlSteeze
Created: Sun Sep 25 15:21:51 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54h7id/ugh/
---
I'm so pissed. I had a meal plan today but my husband decided to take me out for dinner and insisted that I ordered what I want, eating disorder aside. So I ordered pizza. (literally wtf. I'm so stupid.) anyways, about 1000 calories later, here I am, super ready to kill myself. :)
[Rant/Rave] NSV: Because of this sub I didn't binge
/u/eightstone [Height: 5ft 7 | CW: 9st 12lbs| BMI: 21 | Gender: F]
Created: Sun Sep 25 15:14:07 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54h67b/nsv_because_of_this_sub_i_didnt_binge/
---
Today was a clusterfuck of binge triggers. I reached the point of sitting on the kitchen floor with the fridge door open choosing which foods to binge on (avocado on bagel was going to be the first of many things I ate)... I had the food IN MY HAND. This is generally the point of no return. But then, instead of going through with it, I made a post here asking for help. Even just articulating my desire to binge helped me to realise that this binge was about punishing myself, not alleviating hunger. Huge thanks to u/hazelconner and u/pinotblanc for their supportive words. And thank you to this sub for existing. Today I ate 500 calories instead of 5000. Woo!
[Rant/Rave] Went to the doctor today and she did some measurements. Small waist for my weight, ideal body fat, but I know my weight is not good enough. I'm so confused :(
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Sep 25 15:06:20 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54h4ws/went_to_the_doctor_today_and_she_did_some/
---
[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] It's so obvious but people are just noticing.
/u/Bubbline
Created: Sun Sep 25 14:41:42 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54h0p0/its_so_obvious_but_people_are_just_noticing/
---
On mobile at work so no flair, sorry.
I have stomach issues. A lot of nausea and vomiting, could be IBS or endometriosis growing on my bowels. Nobody knows /shrug
My doctor, psychiatrist, therapist, and nurse practitioner (i'm in an IOP program) all know i have stomach issues.
I can hardly eat because i will vomit within an hour. Not even on purpose. It's ruining my life because i throw up at my clients houses and i'm always dizzy and nauseous and i have a fever. They keep putting me on different medications and i feel so weak and blurry and unhappy.
I have no appetite but i serve a plate anyways. i pick at it but i can't eat. i eat on the back porch with my boyfriend, his brother, and his girlfriend. i am 20, my boyfriend is 22, his brother is 19 and she's 16.
Well they try to feed me by shoving food in my mouth. Finally she asks me when everyone went outside "bubbline do you have an eating disorder" and i just froze. she went inside and i forced myself to eat about a bite of everything (spaghetti, salad, bread) but i cried.
So now my ed is back and i am scared to talk to my team about it. i know they're supposed to help me but i'm embarrassed. why can i be treated for depression and bpd fine but not an ed??? it's because i'm obese and no one thinks twice about me not eating most of the time. i feel sick and invisible.
[Help] I think I just binged lol
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Sep 25 13:59:56 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54gtgw/i_think_i_just_binged_lol/
---
[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] [Rant] I am so jealous of my mom
/u/elderflower_7 [5'5" | 129 | 21.3 | -11 | F]
Created: Sun Sep 25 13:48:56 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54grm7/rant_i_am_so_jealous_of_my_mom/
---
For as long as I can remember, I've been jealous of the way my mom looks. She has a much smaller frame, she can eat whatever she likes and still stay skinny, she never had skin problems, her face is so much prettier than mine, small nose, feminine eyebrows, when I look at old pics of her she is so. freaking. cool.
She had short, (dyed) black hair, black clothes, pierced ears, man she was just so fucking cool. Less tall than me (and yes I'm aware I'm not a giant **BUT WHY THE FUCK DO I FEEL LIKE ONE THEN?**). Why can't I be like that?!
But no, I got to inherit my dad's genes. Broad shoulders, big nose, big head, non existent jawline, big big big big big. Ugly. I put fat on waaay faster than the people at my mom's side of the family and my little sister and it drives me crazy.
I'd give anything to look more like my mom. She had that cool boyish casual look and I am so disgusting.
Also it probably doesn't help that I already have a troubled relationship with my mom. She's emotionally abusive, most likely because of paranoid schizophrenia, but she won't accept any therapy, so we'll likely never know for sure what's wrong with her. I ran away 9 months ago and barely see her. I don't know. I don't want to be anything like her but I do want to look like her. Fucks with my head.
Sorry, just had to vent.
[Thinspo] 'Boyish' thinspo
/u/elderflower_7 [5'5" | 129 | 21.3 | -11 | F]
Created: Sun Sep 25 13:33:31 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54gp1r/boyish_thinspo/
---
http://m.imgur.com/a/PNIku
[Thinspo] Daily Thinspo for you guys. 💕
/u/BlackGirlSteeze
Created: Sun Sep 25 13:18:53 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54gmla/daily_thinspo_for_you_guys/
---
https://i.reddituploads.com/be2996eae45141d49a6e2b57e8703b5b?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=5e669c6436cf4013661772ccf8255c78
[Rant/Rave] I went crazy...
/u/sprinkle1997 [5'1 | CW 134 GW 100 | -22 lbs | 19F]
Created: Sun Sep 25 13:12:21 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54glhw/i_went_crazy/
---
My roommate's father made us southern food, like REAL southern food. Ham, mac and cheese, collard greens, potato salad, corn bread...like he went all out. And I completely lost it. I ate so fucking much, idk what happened or why I did that. I feel so gross and guilty. I just want to cry. I never want to eat again
[Goal] How do you plan to reward yourself for reaching goals?
/u/The_Marshmallow_Test [5'5 | CW-120lbs | GW-SkinnyArms&Cheekbones| F]
Created: Sun Sep 25 13:01:03 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54gjn0/how_do_you_plan_to_reward_yourself_for_reaching/
---
I know this thread has been posted before but I'm bored at work and want to engage with you guys :3
When I reach my goal weight (aiming for October 29th !!) I'm gonna buy myself:
- The perfect pair of dark charcoal grey skinny jeans
- A lux oversize turtleneck sweater
- Diptyque perfume
And ok so usually I never reward myself with food. *But* I work on Sundays (fasting day) next to this adorable little pie shop. I always go in there to get my coffee and it smells sooo good and it's so nice and warm in there.
And I always stare like *very aggressively* at all the beautiful little mini pies I can't eat while I wait for my coffee.
So when I reach my goal weight I am going to get to work early that Sunday and treat myself to a mini apple pie :)
[Goal] It's not much but it's definitely a (mini) thigh gap
/u/Squirtlestail [5'6 | CW:115 lbs | 18.5 | GW: 110 lbs]
Created: Sun Sep 25 12:51:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54gi54/its_not_much_but_its_definitely_a_mini_thigh_gap/
---
http://imgur.com/pCJd80s
Eleven days to lose ??
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Sep 25 11:00:20 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54fz3a/eleven_days_to_lose/
---
[deleted]
[Thinspo] Thinspo: disturbingly beautiful contemporary ballet
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Sep 25 10:44:12 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54fwfl/thinspo_disturbingly_beautiful_contemporary_ballet/
---
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dA9cYGWAl8I
[Goal] Does anyone else change their body goals all the time?
/u/peanutbutteredbanana
Created: Sun Sep 25 10:42:41 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54fw6u/does_anyone_else_change_their_body_goals_all_the/
---
This has been wrecking my mind recently. Some days, my mind tells me to starve until my bones are as sharp as knives and there is literally no fat on my body at all. The next day, my minds telling me to stop at around a BMI of 16 and that's good enough. Then my mind is like "how about you work out and get some defined biceps, abs, muscle?! let's have a fit body instead of a half-dead twig!" It's driving me CRAZY because I don't really know what I want. I think what irritates me the most about this is that no matter what I look like, I'll still find flaws and I can't be happy. My body is all I can focus on nowadays :(
[Thinspo] I'm 1 lb away from no longer being overweight, so here's a little fall/winter thinspo to celebrate
/u/onlyroom_forthin [5'6 | CW:151.4.0 | 24.57 | SW:165 | UGW:120 | F]
Created: Sun Sep 25 10:26:00 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54ftfe/im_1_lb_away_from_no_longer_being_overweight_so/
---
http://imgur.com/a/hoCvc
[Rant/Rave] I'm scared of getting my period back
/u/00110100-00110010 [5'4'' | SW 130 | CW 110.2 | UGW 104 | 19.3 | -19 | F]
Created: Sun Sep 25 10:04:25 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54fpxo/im_scared_of_getting_my_period_back/
---
I've been binging a lot lately and trying to cut down on purging (gaining the weight is healthier... or so they say, it sure doesn't feel any better). Anyway, the scale read 113.4 this morning, higher than it's been in months. I lost my period at around 108. I desperately don't want it to come back. It's just so much easier not dealing with cramps and mood swings.
Gotta lose this weight, fast.
[Discussion] Leggings that are ACTUALLY warm?
/u/Vegan_mermaid [5'2" | 91.0 | F]
Created: Sun Sep 25 10:02:37 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54fpmp/leggings_that_are_actually_warm/
---
I am really f'ing cold all the damn time, and right now it's summer/early fall. So it's only going to get colder, and I'd like to be able to wear dresses to work and not be literally too cold to function. So have any of you found leggings that are ACTUALLY warm? Price is no object, seriously.
[Discussion] Daily Food Diary! September 25, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Sun Sep 25 10:02:22 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54fpli/daily_food_diary_september_25_2016/
---
This is a daily food diary thread for September 25, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
[Other] [Update] I have to go to a restaurant for a birthday tomorrow and I'm terrified
/u/pinotblanc [5'3 | GW:115 | 24.8 | -11 | F]
Created: Sun Sep 25 09:31:30 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54fkoj/update_i_have_to_go_to_a_restaurant_for_a/
---
This is an update to [this post](https://www.reddit.com/r/proED/comments/546chq/i_have_to_go_to_a_restaurant_for_a_birthday/) that I posted a couple days ago. I'm sure no one cares, but I'm happy so I want to share!
I went to the birthday yesterday and everything was fine! I weighed myself this morning and am right on track to where I expected myself to be. I fasted all day in preparation and drank lots of water and green tea. I was offered lots of fried appetizers and politely declined. I felt absolutely horrible declining but I just had to get over it. At the end of the day no one can force me to eat anything I don't want to. I started to panic when it was 8:10pm and our food wasn't brought out yet because I never eat after 7:00pm. I drank 4 cups of water during dinner and took half of my plate home. I gave away the unhealthy bits of my plate to my fiance so it wouldn't go to waste (I always feel guilty wasting food). I did eat 4 french fries but it was okay.
I do think eating so late messed me up. We were supposed to eat at 6:30 but people are inconsiderate and arrived over 40 minutes late, so we didn't get our food until 8:25pm. Last night, I was starving at 10pm and just wanted to snack on everything even though I was physically full. I also woke up *ravenous* this morning when I'm usually fine until about 4pm.
TL;DR: I ate at a restaurant for the first time after relapsing and everything was fine!
[Thinspo] If I binge I won't get to look like this!
/u/eightstone [Height: 5ft 7 | CW: 9st 12lbs| BMI: 21 | Gender: F]
Created: Sun Sep 25 09:27:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54fk3j/if_i_binge_i_wont_get_to_look_like_this/
---
http://imgur.com/gallery/QTwh1
[Goal] Tiny progress~down 5 lbs and little rib cage showing ☺️ How is everyone today?
/u/rukittenmerightnow
Created: Sun Sep 25 08:26:26 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54faxu/tiny_progressdown_5_lbs_and_little_rib_cage/
---
https://i.reddituploads.com/cc12592305c344948ac25f04201fb738?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=a3289094a71a3e99356dcc3e5995b930
[Discussion] Do you drink alcohol?
/u/pinotblanc [5'3 | GW:115 | 24.8 | -11 | F]
Created: Sun Sep 25 07:20:23 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54f23w/do_you_drink_alcohol/
---
Right now I fast all day and eat 1 healthy meal of 300-500 calories before 7pm. 5 days of this and I've lost 10 pounds. I haven't been drinking because I'm terrified of getting the munchies and that I'll gain the weight I've lost sans drinking.
I know of getdrunknotfat.com but having tequila around doesn't ease my fear. How do you stop yourself from drunk eating?
[Other] I think I need to look at my b/p problem differently
/u/Mi__ra [165cm |50 kg | 18.6 | 0 | F]
Created: Sun Sep 25 07:17:33 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54f1p7/i_think_i_need_to_look_at_my_bp_problem/
---
So I have spent most of my day going through fatlogic sub and progresspics. I'm just thinking that damn, if people who weigh like 300 lbs can stop eating crap and lose more than half of their weight, why on Earth couldn't I stop eating crap? Yeah, I purge, but if I didn't I would be morbidly obese. And all my health issues *are* because I eat crap. I wouldn't purge if I didn't binge. So I need to make a similar lifestyle change what those seriously overweight people do. I don't need to recover from my eating disorder, I don't need to get rid of an addiction, none of that. I just need to stop eating crap. Somehow it sounds much easier.
[Rant/Rave] [rant] my boyfriend loves to cook but he doesn't know my rules
/u/thinkthinlythrowaway
Created: Sun Sep 25 07:09:41 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54f0ou/rant_my_boyfriend_loves_to_cook_but_he_doesnt/
---
God love him. He's such an amazing cook too and it brings him joy to make me food. Mostly because it's usually the first thing I eat all day (dinner) and I end up binging on his food.
But he does everything from scratch and so I can never calculate the calories.
He also uses things high in calorie cause it make it taste better (obviously) but it wrecks me.
Last night he made this amazing fish and vegetables plate it had swai(?) and carrots and onions and Brussels sprouts (my fucking weakness) and it was roasted not fried because at least he knows I don't do fried. But he put a sauce on it and from what I saw him make the sauce from there was honey, mustard, garlic, tahini, and other stuff. But the love of my life and pain in my ass doesn't ducking measure anything!
He's an amazing chief but he just guestamates eveything so I never know if he added 1 serving of honey or 8...
I mean at least the food he makes is usually healthy. Not a lot of meat, a ton of veggies.
For those who do make your own food how do you go about calculating the calories??? I'm dying over here because I usually just type in the biggest amount I think of because I rather be over calculating than under.
[Meme/Humor] Wishy-Washy ED syndrome! All the pain and suffering of an ED without any of the actually getting thin!
/u/TeaCupGirl [5'8" | CW 124.8lbs | 19 | -15.2lbs |]
Created: Sun Sep 25 07:02:49 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54ezwd/wishywashy_ed_syndrome_all_the_pain_and_suffering/
---
This too can be yours for a lifetime payment of triggering yourself in and out of ED behavior daily! Feel the frustration of not being thin enough AND not being healthy enough at nearly the same time!
But wait, if you order now, you can feel extremely ashamed to open up to anyone about your problems because you're sure they won't believe you. you'll never be able to eat comfortably around them again!
Don't wait, be extremely unsatisfied with life today!
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
*Extreme dissatisfaction is in addition to your already bleak outlook on life; your mileage may vary. Objects in mirror are probably just as big as you think they are. Please don't consult your doctor before trying wishy washy.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
(This is all in good humor, if your ed presents similarly to mine, i'm only poking fun at myself.)
[Help] I WANT TO BINGE (please help me)
/u/eightstone [Height: 5ft 7 | CW: 9st 12lbs| BMI: 21 | Gender: F]
Created: Sun Sep 25 06:40:02 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54exc9/i_want_to_binge_please_help_me/
---
Last night, still heartbroken about my ex, I slept with someone else. He wanted me to stay the night and cuddle afterwards. urgh. I made excuses and just got a taxi home. I feel filthy. I feel like I've betrayed my ex by not waiting for him to change his mind. Sometimes he texts me and says he misses me. He misses me but he doesn't want to be my boyfriend. Or doesn't know if he wants to. Or can't, due to his depression. I've betrayed this new guy by using him horribly. I know this means more to him than it does to me. He kept trying to make plans for us. Dates we need to go on. Day trips. Weekends away. He's so nice. I don't want him though, I just needed to get laid. I'm horrible. I'm a selfish slutty fat creep. I've lost control. I woke up, consumed with shame and guilt (at least it was in my own bed) and immediately ate a packet of crisps and several chocolate bars. The only thing that stopped my binge long enough to type this was noticing the old weight chart I still have on my wall from months ago, tracking my weight weekly: 8st 4lbs, 8st 2lbs, 8st 4lbs, 8st 6 lbs, 8st 4lbs. I still binged occasionally then, but less than I do now. I'm a stone heavier. I can't afford to binge at this weight. I could so easily wind up over 10st. I'm so close. I have to stop eating now. and fast tomorrow to make up for it. I'm desperate for some added motivation here, guys. I'm so scared I'm going to binge. Feel free to tell me how awful I am.
[Discussion] Can you get an ED just out of the blue?
/u/commtra [5'7 | GW:110 | -17,5 | F]
Created: Sun Sep 25 05:32:11 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54eqkl/can_you_get_an_ed_just_out_of_the_blue/
---
Just asking, did any of you just see a picture of a skinny model at age 14 and stop eating? People always assume that's what happened to me..
It seems most people with EDs have been struggling with food & body issues most of their lives. The actual diagnose to mine came years later but when I look back at my childhood I can see all of the signs.
I finally broke 25 inches around my waist! (NSFW)
/u/tallskinnywannabe8
Created: Sun Sep 25 05:19:23 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54epgl/i_finally_broke_25_inches_around_my_waist_nsfw/
---
http://imgur.com/RJfRBPO
[Rant/Rave] I'm so tired of people telling me they have an eating disorder
/u/Hamily [5'4.5" | 91 | 15.62 | -49 | F]
Created: Sun Sep 25 03:45:20 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54ehw6/im_so_tired_of_people_telling_me_they_have_an/
---
You know the ones.. The people who 100% DO NOT and in NO WAY form or fashion have one..
It makes me so mad. You don't understand the struggle I'm going through and yup, you're right there with me aren't you..? Let me just comfort you about that pizza you ate last night?
I'm becoming so bitter haha
To be clear:
My post was directed towards people claiming to have anorexia when they (clearly) do not.
[Rant/Rave] (TMI) Been vomitting all night (5x) following a major binge that my body can't handle anymore because of prolonged fasting.
/u/cannibale101 [5'4 | HW:150smtg | CW: heh | GW:108 | 28F]
Created: Sun Sep 25 03:43:24 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54ehqs/tmi_been_vomitting_all_night_5x_following_a_major/
---
Feels like i'm losing control over my body, even more than through binges. I can't take the day off tomorrow so i'll go to work anyway, but this is getting scary. I don't know how to eat with moderation and i still have to lose.
[Other] I know life is hard right now but we'll make it through this. Keep fighting.
/u/Melusedek [173 | CW: 57.5 | GW ?? | 19.21/18.99 | F]
Created: Sun Sep 25 03:26:29 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54eggb/i_know_life_is_hard_right_now_but_well_make_it/
---
http://imgur.com/uBTFnLF
[Help] First meal of the day
/u/EatMyInsides [156cm | CW:49.8kg | BMI: 21.30 | Weight Lost: N/A | Genderfluid]
Created: Sun Sep 25 03:15:02 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54efls/first_meal_of_the_day/
---
I always try to eat the first meal of the day as late as possible. It's because when I start eating, I can't stop. I eat even though I'm not hugry and I feel terrible. I try to keep myself busy but it rarely helps. I don't know what to do. As long as I don't start eating, I can stay away from it, but the problem is that I still live with my mother and she will notice if I don't eat and she will ask me about it and get angry with me for not eating.
Any tips on what I can do??
[Discussion] Has anyone's ED made them do bad things?
/u/toastyhigh [5'3.5 | 108.5| F]
Created: Sun Sep 25 02:23:19 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54eblq/has_anyones_ed_made_them_do_bad_things/
---
Sometimes I feel so horrible looking at the things I've done, I straight up want to punch myself in the face. I've taken food from others, when I shouldn't have. Wasted mine and other people's money. Wasted time that I could have used studying or doing important work binging and purging. I just fucking hate myself so much. Hell, I barely even socialize any more(but that may be cause of isolating myself from stress as well).
[Rant/Rave] Suprise!
/u/krebsunicycle [5'7" | 110lbs | 17.17 | F]
Created: Sat Sep 24 23:33:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54dwx7/suprise/
---
I was eating some food my roommate made us. When we were mostly done she tells me she put a WHOLE STICK OF BUTTER in it. o_o
I really had to work my poker face for that one.
[Discussion] How do you all print your thinspo?
/u/TakeItOneDayAtATime [5'2" | CW 110 | 20.84 | -3 | F]
Created: Sat Sep 24 23:04:06 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54dtzc/how_do_you_all_print_your_thinspo/
---
Quick question to everyone with beautiful thinspo walls/notebook - where/how do you print all your pretty pictures and quotes?
Need to undo all the bored snacking I've been doing since school started, so I found a bunch of pretty pictures I want to be able to see constantly at home. But I don't own a printer, so my options right now are pretty much:
A) School library (printers aren't that great and are in a high-traffic area)
B) Fedex Kinkos (do employees judge?)
Does anyone run into similar problems or have solutions?
[Discussion] Favorite 0 Cal fizzy waters?
/u/ChubbyBunny8 [5'2" | 137 | 25.96 | -13 | F]
Created: Sat Sep 24 22:48:52 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54dsfn/favorite_0_cal_fizzy_waters/
---
Hi everyone, I love the LaCroix brand, but i'm trying to branch out to try new fizzy waters. I like Kroger brand thus far. I don't like the kinds with any sweeter in them. Do you all have any recommendations?
[Intro] Intro because why not
/u/erilaz- [5'7 | CW: 185 | GW: 110 | -45lbs | F]
Created: Sat Sep 24 22:36:35 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54dr5u/intro_because_why_not/
---
[removed]
[Help] Am I fat? I gained like 6 lbs back from what I lost :( sorry if it's not a good question
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Sep 24 21:39:27 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54dkkg/am_i_fat_i_gained_like_6_lbs_back_from_what_i/
---
https://i.reddituploads.com/ed66782605fc4fe996275fa1b878e7d0?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=27b4be4347196b08b97b876a46dd030f
How to disappear completely
/u/throwaway03199519 [5'6 | CW 114 | GW 110| 18.47| -22| F]
Created: Sat Sep 24 21:05:11 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54dgdr/how_to_disappear_completely/
---
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nZq_jeYsbTs
[Rant/Rave] Bless this place... A little bit intro and a little bit rant ;)
/u/miss_morticia [5'10" | cw: 146 | gw: 105 | 20.90 | F]
Created: Sat Sep 24 19:51:14 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54d6z2/bless_this_place_a_little_bit_intro_and_a_little/
---
Just wanted to officially say hi :)
I've been lurking here for a bit now but finally decided to take the plunge and become more active. I love the energy in this sub, I've never come across a community with the kind of positivity and support this one has, so thank you all for that!
Ugh, I had been on a roll with restricting till Wednesday night when I flipped out and binged/purged. My stressors are always work or family related, and I'm getting better at managing them but I still need work. Thursday and Friday went great then today I slipped and did a half binge today before I caught myself and stopped. It's all gonna be okay is the little mantra I have going right now because I don't want to purge. I'd rather do a liquids only fast tomorrow. My teeth are messed up enough already lol.
Breathe, breathe. It's all gonna be okay.
Hope everyone is having a wonderful weekend. xo
[Rant/Rave] I feel like I want to run
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Sep 24 19:46:06 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54d6bo/i_feel_like_i_want_to_run/
---
[deleted]
[Discussion] What song lyrics do you currently relate to?
/u/H2OandCaffeine [5ft7 | FAT | -20 lbs | F]
Created: Sat Sep 24 19:39:33 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54d5il/what_song_lyrics_do_you_currently_relate_to/
---
https://www.reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54d5il/what_song_lyrics_do_you_currently_relate_to/
My Mother has One Perfect Child
/u/deanhipchester [5' | 115.2 lbs | 23.69 | -27.4 lbs | F]
Created: Sat Sep 24 19:13:06 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54d1vp/my_mother_has_one_perfect_child/
---
And it's not me.
[Rant/Rave] Never eating a hamburger again
/u/Alexa1p [5'5'' | 110 | 18 | -10.7 | F]
Created: Sat Sep 24 17:53:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54cr53/never_eating_a_hamburger_again/
---
My bf and I are in a bdsm dynamic. So today I drove to McDonald's and binged on garlic fries and a cheeseburger. When I got home, my boyfriend kissed me, then frowned, and said: "You taste like hamburgers. That's really not your aesthetic, you almost always smell like vanilla, or some sort of fruit. From now on I don't want you to eat hamburgers. Okay, pet?" And then kissed me again and made me brush my teeth.
And that made me really happy, like fuck I'm definitely never eating a hamburger again while I'm dating him. I know some people might find that restrictive and hate that, but I am so giddy right now, I'm so glad he did that. ♤
[Tip] Low-carb protein avocado cookies, 70 a pop
/u/apricaught [5'3.5"| CW 116.8 |LW 114.2| 20.85| -16| F]
Created: Sat Sep 24 15:50:34 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54c9cu/lowcarb_protein_avocado_cookies_70_a_pop/
---
http://thehappyhealthfreak.com/2015/03/healthy-avocado-chocolate-chip-cookies-vegan-gf/
[Rant/Rave] I can't stand the weekends
/u/smallpaint [6'2" | 165.2lb | M]
Created: Sat Sep 24 15:26:12 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54c5mn/i_cant_stand_the_weekends/
---
During the weekday, I've got a Routine. I know how to restrict properly, and I know how to stay on track. On the weekends, though, my family piles on the food until any progress I made previously is fucked.
At this point, I'm restricting so that the forced "binges" won't make me gain weight. This is impossible.
[Intro] New to reddit! Introduction.
/u/BlackGirlSteeze
Created: Sat Sep 24 14:34:47 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54bxmj/new_to_reddit_introduction/
---
Hey, my name is Nadeja. I'm called Aleksana (middle name) and I find that any forum site I get on I seek out the people with eating disorders. I just like relateable stuff. I feel less judged and more myself. I like body modification and cats. My ears are stretched big and I have knuckle tattoos. Tell me something about you. :)
💕
/u/BlackGirlSteeze
Created: Sat Sep 24 14:22:20 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54bvkr/_/
---
https://i.reddituploads.com/aa2ad890661d48c086fdc386115d36f2?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=05c72a8d5aa3b2d7ec3512e95a479474
[Other] Restricting is becoming easier and easier
/u/hazelconner [5'4" | 179.6 | 34.0% BF | -10.4 | X/F]
Created: Sat Sep 24 13:33:32 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54bnvf/restricting_is_becoming_easier_and_easier/
---
I used to "diet" at 1500 calories I was probably over eating too. But staying strictly below 1200 and burning an extra 400 through exercise. And it's becoming easier and easier. Almost alarmingly so. I'm almost 21 days in. Some cravings are getting strong. And I need help. I really want Chinese food :(
This sounds really weird, but how do you lose muscle?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Sep 24 13:29:06 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54bn50/this_sounds_really_weird_but_how_do_you_lose/
---
[deleted]
[Help] Help!
/u/rottingangel
Created: Sat Sep 24 13:08:01 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54bjrl/help/
---
[removed]
[Discussion] Do you have set mealtimes?
/u/woollyshirt [172cm | 54.3kg | 18.19 | -33.7kg | NB/M]
Created: Sat Sep 24 12:52:41 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54bh7v/do_you_have_set_mealtimes/
---
I typically don't like eating past 6pm and drinking past 7pm but today I had dinner at 7pm and it feels really weird and like my morning weight will be super high because I've just eaten 'late' even though I know most people don't eat as early as 7pm....
Do you guys have a deadline of what's too late to eat? Or set mealtimes in general? I'm curious :)
[Rant/Rave] Betrayal/Heartbreak makes for great fasting...
/u/thatonegirlfrommath [5'5" | 131.2 | 21.8 | F]
Created: Sat Sep 24 12:48:28 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54bgip/betrayalheartbreak_makes_for_great_fasting/
---
I posted Thursday about my boyfriend of two years being married. I'm feeling alright about the situation right now, but all the stress of it has made me not want to eat. I'm not hungry and I have a lump in my throat so big that, when I did try to force down some food, I wanted to throw it up immediately.
So, Thursday I had only eaten a 200cal powerbar. I was in the bathtub wasting time until dinner when I found out and was too upset that night to eat. Friday brought more stress. I worked all day and couldn't eat, so I ended up just having a ~350cal sandwich just to keep me from a headache. Still haven't eaten today and don't think I will until a small >400cal dinner tonight....
I've never been a super-restricter. 800cal is about the lowest I'll go, and then only for a few days at a time. This whole fucked up situation has made me go from 138.6 to 134.6 in two days...(obvi water weight was at play). And even when the stress wears off, I'm so pissed and spiteful, I can see me keeping up with this just because he knows I don't eat when I'm stressed and if he sees a low-weight pic of me he'll worry.
[Rant/Rave] New low weight, yet I don't really feel accomplished
/u/TooMuch0000
Created: Sat Sep 24 12:25:20 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54bcov/new_low_weight_yet_i_dont_really_feel_accomplished/
---
First time posting, lurked for a year.
I'm 5'2, I'm at my lowest weight I've been in awhile, but I feel so fat and dissatisfied. I felt so happy, briefly, to get under 120, then 110; I'm at 109 dry weight.
I always have 20 pounds to lose cuz I never look as good as I think I will 5 pounds down. Then I realize I must've looked way worse than I thought at my highest if I don't even look good now.
I have BED, but I've been strict no binge for like two weeks (at most, I hit maintenance). Completely cutting out sugar (and absolutely anything sweet tasting) and wheat really helps.
[Rant/Rave] nothing works
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Sep 24 11:55:51 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54b7yl/nothing_works/
---
[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] Trying to stand firm in my decision and my ex is getting married today
/u/explodingrhinoceros [5'7" | CW: 166.0 | BMI: 25.9 | SW: 220.0 lbs | GW: 125.0 lbs | F]
Created: Sat Sep 24 11:26:00 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54b3b6/trying_to_stand_firm_in_my_decision_and_my_ex_is/
---
I'm just so overwhelmed right now. Things on the outside are actually going well- I've just got a little part time temp job with potential after many months of unemployment. I'm meeting and clicking with a bunch of new people. However, I'm kind of losing my shit over two random triggers.
I got word of my 10 year high school reunion the other day... and the second I heard that my thoughts immediately went to: "I won't go unless I lose 25 pounds in the next two months." So I talked it over with a good friend who is super empathetic to mental health stuff and EDs, and she kinda echoed my sentiment about not going because it could ruin my progress I've been kinda making with seeing a dietitian and stuff. But none of my close friends who I went to high school with really get it. All they're saying is "Boo, you're lame." and "Oh, come on." No. High school was awful enough for me, and I felt just as out of place at my 5 year reunion as I did back in high school. However, part of me wants to restrict and purge for the next two months to get some kind of fucked up "revenge" that doesn't even matter.
Oh, and one of my most significant exes is getting married today, to the girl he dated after me. I know I was almost 100% responsible for the demise of that relationship (borderline personality disorder will do that to you), but it's a mindfuck. In the back of my mind, I'm hearing the whole... yeah he didn't want to be with you, but at least you can restrict and control your body and look better than this girl.
I'm struggling. I slipped and bought laxatives and then took one earlier. Damn.
[Thinspo] Her collarbones are beautiful, and she looks SO GOOD in her sweater!
/u/Space-Punk [5'11" | -31lbs | 20M]
Created: Sat Sep 24 10:29:50 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54au6x/her_collarbones_are_beautiful_and_she_looks_so/
---
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XKVImK7DFFU
[Rant/Rave] Pigging out: a little rant by me
/u/pineapplesandham [5'3 | 95 lbs | 17.29 | -10 lbs | F]
Created: Sat Sep 24 10:22:29 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54asy8/pigging_out_a_little_rant_by_me/
---
I wanted to stick to 1200 calories a day, but I find that it's unsustainable if I'm going to school (big campus = sooo much walking holy crap). I end up "binging" on 200 cal of nuts and banana chips. I feel disgusting, I've been doing about 1400 cal for the past week and I'm just waiting for the scale to go up...
Okay, I know that technically, 1400 is around my TDEE, so it should be okay... but fucking anxiety man.
[Discussion] Daily Food Diary! September 24, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Sat Sep 24 10:02:18 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54appt/daily_food_diary_september_24_2016/
---
This is a daily food diary thread for September 24, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
[Discussion] Pleasantly surprised by photos..?
/u/throwaway03199519 [5'6 | CW 114 | GW 110| 18.47| -22| F]
Created: Sat Sep 24 10:02:14 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54appd/pleasantly_surprised_by_photos/
---
Does anyone else get really surprised when they see a candid photo taken of themselves? Like to the point where they almost don't recognize themselves? When I look in the mirror I still see myself as a little chubby and could be better. But I seriously did not recognize that this was a pic of me for like a few seconds and was shocked that I actually kind of look like a string bean. There are obviously places I can see that I would like to lose from, but still does anyone else experience this?
Here is the photo:
https://imgur.com/a/aBjAy
Also lmao the explanation of this pic was that I was trashed and was trying to hitchhike home, hence my hand :p
[Rant/Rave] Got Bronkaid.. And They Totally Carded Me!
/u/nothanksiatealready [5'2 | CW 111.6 | GW 105 | BMI: 20.3 | -5.5 | F]
Created: Sat Sep 24 10:01:48 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54apmz/got_bronkaid_and_they_totally_carded_me/
---
Never done an EC stack before but was convinced after you guys talked so much about it. Got my caffeine from the vitamin shoppe, no big. I go into Rite Aid, to the pharmacy... thinking no big, no one on this subreddit seems to ever get asked for I.D.
TOTALLY ASKED. and then the lady slowly typed in ALL my ID info into her computer before i could buy it. IM ON A LIST! haha no ok I know im not, i know they probably do that to track and make sure im not buying in bulk from multiple locations for like, making drugs or whatever. But man...it was so awkward.
Well, plus side thats all over and just took my first stack to test how i feel :)
35 days binge purge free progress pics
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Sep 24 09:34:00 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54aleq/35_days_binge_purge_free_progress_pics/
---
[deleted]
[Other] Not sure why I still go on Omegle....
/u/throwaway912837198 [5'8" | 112 | 17 | F]
Created: Sat Sep 24 09:12:36 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54ai9b/not_sure_why_i_still_go_on_omegle/
---
http://i.imgur.com/blsy5Eu.png
[Goal] I am in pain, but i am not fat(ter)
/u/goddamnroommate [5'6" | 143.8 | 23.30 | -50ish | F]
Created: Sat Sep 24 09:02:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54agvj/i_am_in_pain_but_i_am_not_fatter/
---
Had to work again yesterday at my ice cream store. Binged. Went into that rabid mode, yknow? where you don't really feel human, you just feel driven to *consume*. That usually doesnt happen in front of people and i attribute it to having a weird food schedule the day before, and not having had a "true binge" day in a couple of weeks (which is actually pretty great!)
Anyway, I had
7 oreos (371)
100ish grams of chocolate/yellow sheet cake (450)
1 twix (143)
2 cookie dough pucks* (360)
1 cookie (150)
1 protein bar (180)
2 (small, well portioned) ice creams (500)
For a grand binge total of:
**2154**
That didn't include my food from before:
subway sandwich (450)
chicken breast (150)
making today a grand total of:
**2754**
I was freaking out, and it didn't help that my coworker/manager had called in a newbie and we had one person too many. It was a very slow night for a very long time and we ran out of things to do/teach. So he said i might be able to get home around 8:30. My preferred gym closes at midnight, so that would have been perfect time for me to get there and work out until close.
But then he was like "nah, gotta stay the shift" because we actually began to get busy. So it was like getting pulled around and not feeling secure in any one plan. That sucked. But then the SO came through hard and told me of a franchise that was actually only 11 minutes away from the store and 20ish from my house.
Got off of work, got there and
Killed it on high volume chest day (after doing a bit of a strength focused routine for flat bench (got 95lbs for a rep and a half lol), i switched to volume for everything else because more calories) **[~75]**
Interval biked for 20ish minutes **[160]**
ran .15mi/walked .05mi for 5.2miles at slight incline **[573]**
tried the run/walk split after getting water/going to the bathroom, but my knee was killing me and i only made it another mile and a half. Switched to steep incline, slower walking **[257]**
Total given exercise calories:
**1065**
Total working calories:
1065 x .9 (machine error) = **959**
So:
2754 - 1975 (light exercise TDEE: good description of my day at ice cream store without going to gym-- I am on my feet constantly for about 7 hours) = 781
781 - 959 = **-178**
Aw heck yes!! Being somewhat significantly into safe territory after such a sucky binge makes me so happy. Holy crap it is so worth the pain tbh. I'll just take some aspirin and forget about it. I work another 7 hours tonight, and im hoping the pain kind of acts as a reminder, like "this is what you have to do if you eat anything"
* in reference to the cookie dough pucks, i want to point out that i ate them like the disgusting creature i am after having been told that there was a potential recall and we are not allowed to sell them to customers. Just binge things
[Rant/Rave] [Rant] Nobody needs this amount of food. Why force it on me?
/u/shefadesaway [5'5" |125 lbs | 20.8 | 10 lbs | F ]
Created: Sat Sep 24 08:16:14 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54aadq/rant_nobody_needs_this_amount_of_food_why_force/
---
It's not even 4 PM yet.
I usually try to avoid eating before four which has been working great lately - school until three, come home, stay busy until almost four since that's when my mum has been leaving for work lately and promise to eat her cooking or my school lunch since "there's just not enough time to eat between periods, I swear!".
I have complete control over what I eat after she's gone. My father doesn't really care or is too clueless and I could always say I've already eaten. Maybe I'll have a tiny portion of whatever my mum made me or, if I'm feeling indulgent, the whole sandwich from lunch (slathered in margarine because my mum insists she makes my lunches) and in the evenings I'll raid our fridge for a whole load of vegetables, or some grapes if I can fit them in.
But it's the weekend, and not even 4 PM yet, and my mum likes to force-feed me so we can have meals together. So I need to have breakfast, strike number one, but it's manageable - I log a slice of low carb bread at 104 kcal and my thin coating of cream cheese as two whole servings at 102 kcal. A few hours later, it's obviously time for lunch, except it isn't, but I need to eat a gigantic plate of pasta that I know has olive oil in it with some meatballs even though I don't eat meat, strike two, I honestly don't know how to log this one, it seems to come out as 1800 kcal.
I manage to avoid a sugary pastry somehow.
It's time for lunch after lunch - like honestly, why? Alright, I can handle salad. But wait, let's add pine seeds. And cheese. Pre-shredded. And even though I tried so hard to stop it, some balsamic vinegar chock-full of sugar and olive oil, of course, must be healthy, right? Third strike, game over and out.
I'm not going to lose weight like this. Especially not when she has a six day vacation coming up. And doesn't have work tomorrow. I can kiss goodbye my work, and I don't even know why - this amount of food is excessive, I'm not even underweight, I could genuinely stand to lose a few pounds. She doesn't know that I've been losing weight.
She even complimented my figure today. I have disgusting stems for legs. She makes disgusting chewing noises.
Shit, and I was looking forward to a sinner's dinner.
[Meme/Humor] Stupid fat logic joke inside
/u/Navelpudding [5' 6" | 185 | -65 | F]
Created: Sat Sep 24 07:43:01 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54a610/stupid_fat_logic_joke_inside/
---
They say they want the skinny gene but what they really want is to be able to wear skinny jeans.
Wasn't sure where else to put this but I felt funny.
[Intro] Introduction & first pledge!
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Sep 24 06:36:42 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/549y07/introduction_first_pledge/
---
[deleted]
[Discussion] 'Stupid Questions' Saturday! September 24, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Sat Sep 24 06:02:38 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/549u78/stupid_questions_saturday_september_24_2016/
---
This is the weekly 'Stupid Questions' Saturday thread for September 24, 2016.
Use this thread as an opportunity to ask any questions you might have that you feel don't necessarily warrant their own post.
Please be wary of false advice and information. Be sure to research the facts before taking anyone's advice, no matter who they are. Remember that diagnosing members is unacceptable. **Anyone looking for medical guidance should seek the opinion of a medically licensed professional.**
*****
Have any questions or concerns? Comment below, or [PM the mods.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FproED)
[Rant/Rave] Ultimate triggering... :^)
/u/electille [5'7 | 123 | 19.2 | ?]
Created: Sat Sep 24 04:39:02 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/549mpg/ultimate_triggering/
---
Just found out my crush likes that skinny af, pale, bruised aesthetic type of girl. I'm all of those, except skinny af.
Even though he knows about my ((recently returned)) ED, and calls me good girl if I eat my lunch, and asked me if I'd eat if he bought food for me (which he has done), and used to have an ED as well (so I don't wanna trigger him)...
It still triggers the fuck out of me.
[Rant/Rave] heartbroken but 2lbs down.
/u/eightstone [Height: 5ft 7 | CW: 9st 12lbs| BMI: 21 | Gender: F]
Created: Sat Sep 24 04:13:51 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/549kjy/heartbroken_but_2lbs_down/
---
Bumped into The Ex last night. It was a disaster. I miss him. My heart just aches when he's around. It aches when he's not around, but I always feel like seeing him will alleviate the heartache, and this optimistic longing makes the pain bearable. However, when I occasionally do see him the ache only seems more pronounced and incurable and hopeless. He's never going to say the things that need to be said to stop the hurting. He doesn't love me. Maybe never loved me. Why should he. He owes me nothing. I am no-one.
But the only calories I consumed yesterday came from vodka. and today I'm 2lbs down from yesterday. 6lbs down from the weight given in my flair as I haven't changed it for a few days. I wish I could just disappear today. Flicker out. At least there's 2lbs less of me now.
[Help] Recovering from ED - how to avoid forums
/u/L0nelyprincess
Created: Sat Sep 24 03:53:45 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/549iuh/recovering_from_ed_how_to_avoid_forums/
---
Hi, so I keep going back to eating disorder forums, especially MPA. I was hoping for advice on how to avoid them?
[Help] Random triggering things, or maybe I'm just losing my shit
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Sep 24 03:32:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/549h6b/random_triggering_things_or_maybe_im_just_losing/
---
[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] Eeeek! I have only had access to my scales twice this month and this morning I have new LW!!!!
/u/Rikicarvu [5'8" | 109.2lbs | 16.36 | -20lbs | F]
Created: Sat Sep 24 02:39:32 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/549cwm/eeeek_i_have_only_had_access_to_my_scales_twice/
---
This is tiny pointless post but I just had to tell someone because I am so shocked and surpised and happy and *adkdjdkghdfkdfgk*!!
My last weigh in was on the 13th and I was 112.4. Two days before then I was 113.8. But now I'm **109.1 :O :O :O**
Technically I weighed myself four times (in disbelief) and I got 108.6 twice and 109.4 twice so I just took an average, but I'm still super **psyyyyyched** :D
Thanks to anyone who bothered to read this dumb ramble :)
[Rant/Rave] i ate a lot today (just gross/trigger: talkin' 'bout food)
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Sep 24 01:17:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5496ck/i_ate_a_lot_today_just_grosstrigger_talkin_bout/
---
[deleted]
[Other] Apparently all it takes now is 1/2 a beer for me to get drunk and start writing cheesy poetry
/u/The_Marshmallow_Test [5'5 | CW-120lbs | GW-SkinnyArms&Cheekbones| F]
Created: Fri Sep 23 19:49:42 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54867c/apparently_all_it_takes_now_is_12_a_beer_for_me/
---
https://i.reddituploads.com/aacb7b91d3ec4abcb353cec7bec27d07?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=7186c4235ec84fb2672b0fb0aef96338
[Help] ED and Relationships?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Sep 23 18:39:35 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/547wxi/ed_and_relationships/
---
[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] Fucking friends didn't show up so now I'm drinking more
/u/DenyMyHunger [5'7"| Fat! | UGW:112| F]
Created: Fri Sep 23 18:12:35 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/547t6b/fucking_friends_didnt_show_up_so_now_im_drinking/
---
My daily total works out at 1500 instead of 1100 like I thought cos my friends didn't show up and I'm drinking their share cos i can't stop when I'm drunk. This is a fuckin disaster. Looks like I'm eating nothing on Sunday. This is such a fuckin disaster. I don't know what to do. Fuck this. I'm so sorry ProED :(
TL;DR: Over my daily goal and freaking out!!!
[Rant/Rave] Oblivious comments
/u/EmpireStateBitch [5'4" | 122.4lbs | -6 | F]
Created: Fri Sep 23 18:09:47 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/547srb/oblivious_comments/
---
The other day it was unavoidable, I had to eat and it had to be in front of someone else. As if that weren't enough, as we were eating, he said to me "I feel like I never see you eat! This must be the first time I've seen you eat." And all of a sudden I just felt sick. Not only was I eating in front of someone else, they noticed it, AND they commented on the novelty of seeing me eat. It just made me feel like a failure. That's such a normal thing for him to say, but to someone with an ED, it becomes so damaging.
100 Cal PER PINT ice cream!!!!!!
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Sep 23 16:33:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/547e0o/100_cal_per_pint_ice_cream/
---
http://imgur.com/a/bg6aL
[Other] What's the kindest, most supportive thing an SO has said to you about your eating disorder?
/u/brlouse [5'2 | 116.0 | 21.2 | -15 | F]
Created: Fri Sep 23 16:21:28 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/547c6p/whats_the_kindest_most_supportive_thing_an_so_has/
---
https://www.reddit.com/r/proED/comments/547c6p/whats_the_kindest_most_supportive_thing_an_so_has/
[Rant/Rave] [rant] lol when you go over so you just binge on Popeyes
/u/thinkthinlythrowaway
Created: Fri Sep 23 16:20:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/547c1z/rant_lol_when_you_go_over_so_you_just_binge_on/
---
I had like 300 calories from my daily intake. Ate one biscuit without thinking (260 calories) decided fuck it and ate everything in sight.
Gotta love my brain
[Help] What to eat before drinking?
/u/fayeeee
Created: Fri Sep 23 15:29:24 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5473d5/what_to_eat_before_drinking/
---
Hi everyone x
I'm in recovery and a healthy weight (thought I relapsed a while ago but got back on track). ANYWAY, I ate a lot today, much more than my usual maintenance intake, and feel really sick. Knowing me, I probably won't have much appetite tomorrow and just stick to tea/coffee with milk and sugar. However, I'm going out drinking with my friends tomorrow night and heard it's dangerous to drink on an empty stomach. First off - is that even true, and is the tea not enough? Second - if I do eat, what is the best "light" thing to have before drinking?
Thanks!
[Thinspo] This hips!!! ♡♡♡
/u/citrus_cunt [5' 9"| 139lbs | 19.5| +2lbs | F]
Created: Fri Sep 23 15:25:23 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5472n3/this_hips/
---
http://imgur.com/GldCuki
[Help] Why does nobody want to help me?
/u/sarahin1995
Created: Fri Sep 23 15:25:14 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5472m1/why_does_nobody_want_to_help_me/
---
[removed]
[Discussion] Can I gain muscle on a caloric deficit? If yes, how small does that deficit have to be?
/u/Alexa1p [5'5'' | 110 | 18 | -10.7 | F]
Created: Fri Sep 23 15:17:33 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5471cq/can_i_gain_muscle_on_a_caloric_deficit_if_yes_how/
---
I need to be stronger. My two primary hobbies are rock climbing and pole dancing, and to improve... well, I have to build up some muscle. The thing is, I've been eating about 500-900 calories a day for months.
For the past few weeks I've tried eating 1300-2000 calories a day, and it's awful. The past few days I've only been eating around 600 because I can't bear to watch the numbers on the scale go up, to watch my tummy swell up and my thighs get thicker...
That being said, I've been making sure that I eat tons of protein. Those 600 calories included 70g of it, which I know is vital for muscle growth and maintenance.
Should I just give up my hobbies? Will I actually lose muscle eating only 600-1000 calories a day, even if I'm eating above the recommended amount of protein?
This is what I currently look like:
http://imgur.com/a/vsrEr
I'm pretty sure even underneath my layer of fat there isn't much muscle. I am the definition of skinny-fat.
[Help] Finally introducing myself...Hi :) and help??
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Sep 23 15:16:15 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54714p/finally_introducing_myselfhi_and_help/
---
[deleted]
[Meme/Humor] That's not your stomach growling!
/u/Noroeste [5'6 | can fit in a rowboat | F]
Created: Fri Sep 23 15:04:50 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/546z7n/thats_not_your_stomach_growling/
---
http://i.imgur.com/bqH8orP.png
[Thinspo] Excellent male thinspo (skinny-gay-thinspo.tumblr.com)
/u/Noroeste [5'6 | can fit in a rowboat | F]
Created: Fri Sep 23 15:00:02 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/546ycm/excellent_male_thinspo_skinnygaythinspotumblrcom/
---
http://imgur.com/a/32PlG
[Intro] Intro Post/How I Ended Up Here
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Sep 23 14:36:44 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/546ud1/intro_posthow_i_ended_up_here/
---
[deleted]
[Meme/Humor] Binging vs restricting
/u/downtownhomebound
Created: Fri Sep 23 14:14:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/546qa7/binging_vs_restricting/
---
Restricting: 2 portions? More like 14 portions
Binging: 4 portions? More like half a portion
Why am I like this
[Rant/Rave] Binge or Starve?
/u/InSkyLimitEra [5' 7.25" | HW 180 | CW 113 | LW 113 | 29 F]
Created: Fri Sep 23 14:11:12 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/546pof/binge_or_starve/
---
Does anyone else ever feel like "okay, I need to stop eating normally because [insert thing that made you emotionally out of whack]. Now then, should I binge or should I starve? I can't make up my mind!"
That's such a weird thought that I've had all day. They're complete opposites! And I'm still debating. Do I want to just stop eating for a while, or do I want to drink at least an entire bottle of wine for dinner? Maybe with some chips? It just doesn't make any sense. Maybe just because they're both coping mechanisms and I need either one or the other despite them being opposites.
I had such a strong start to the school year but I did terribly on today's exam. 70% (70 needed to pass), WAY below the class average of ~87 (SD ~7.5%). I feel like I study as hard as I can every time (medical school), and sometimes I absolutely knock it out of the park, while other times I fail. It makes me feel like I have no control at all. Hence why I'm feeling this way.
I'm presenting my research at a medical conference tomorrow, and I'll be expected to eat all day there like everyone else. Also not fun. Also a lack of control. Ugh.
Guess I just needed to rant to people who's get it. Thanks. <3
[Rant/Rave] Just found my roommate's scale (it was packed away), and now I feel like crap
/u/abond4 [5'7.5 | 127 | 19.6 | -53 | F]
Created: Fri Sep 23 13:51:24 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/546m1t/just_found_my_roommates_scale_it_was_packed_away/
---
I weighed myself and it said anywhere between 131-135. I've been restricting for weeks now (max 1000 Calories a day; usually less). Is it really possible that I haven't lost anything? Maybe even gained a bit? Is the scale just inaccurate? It's a little beat up and my roommate is a BIG girl (somewhere in the 280+ range). Maybe she broke it somehow.
I shouldn't jump to the conclusion that it's inaccurate though. Obviously I'm doing something wrong, even though I thought I looked thinner. Guess who's not eating at all this weekend....
[Help] University lunch ideas for someone who's gone all day?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Sep 23 13:50:49 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/546ly0/university_lunch_ideas_for_someone_whos_gone_all/
---
[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] [Rant] My mom kicked me out.
/u/NotSoSlimJim_ [6'5" | 254.6 lbs | 28.06 | - 6.2 | 24M]
Created: Fri Sep 23 13:47:00 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/546l8k/rant_my_mom_kicked_me_out/
---
My mom kicked me out of her house.
I dropped out of college one year ago and moved into my mom's place. When I first moved in, she was really busy with her work and whatnot, and she was never really home, so she never payed much attention to her son on the couch.
But, my mom lost her job a few weeks ago, and she's been searching for somewhere to work. So she's been seeing me a lot more lately. I guess my mom's getting stressed out by my presence, and we had a big fight. She was shouting at me, and I guess I said something that upset her, 'cause she threw a vase at me (and missed).
I've always known my mom's had issues with anger. She always fought with my dad when I was growing up, and she had such a short temper. But this lit my fuse, and I grabbed my stuff and got out.
I've been couch-surfing at some of my friend's houses, still going to work, but I'm way too stressed out right now, and I actually haven't eaten in five days. I finally weighed myself today and I was 248.5! I'm guessing I dropped a lot of water weight from not eating, but it's really a huge accomplishment to be under 250 for me.
[Rant/Rave] Major setback
/u/14C-sucrose [5'4" | 124 | 21.28 | -52 | F]
Created: Fri Sep 23 13:26:14 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/546hft/major_setback/
---
Hey lovelies. About a month and a half ago I ended up taking Plan B (we had an oops). And my body is still totally fucking wrecked, my boobs are a cup size swollen, I'm the most bloated I've been in a couple years, and packed on 6 or 7 lbs. I cannot wait for my body to just readjust to feeling normal again, let alone being able to workout without feeling nauseous from the hormone imbalance.
I don't even know why I'm posting this, it's pointless and whiny. But if there's anyone else out there going through weird setbacks, I'm here for you <3
[Rant/Rave] [rant] days already wrecked
/u/thinkthinlythrowaway
Created: Fri Sep 23 13:23:10 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/546gxb/rant_days_already_wrecked/
---
I had a study date at Panera and had a nice bagel which I planned for. But what I didn't plan for was the green tea isn't actually 0 calories like I always (stupidly) thought.
I should have gone with the acai berry unsweet... But I didn't think about it I though cause it didn't say sweet the green tea wasn't calorie filled. I had 3 glasses at 130 calories each...
And my 400 ish breakfast became 800. And now my day is fucked.
And cause I was salty about it I just ate pineapple and peaches and a cookie because fuck me.
And because my boyfriend has today off I'll actually probably had some type of good (meaning an actual) dinner.
I guess I could just go super light on it tomorrow and Sunday...
It just sucks because I wanted to keep under 1000
Any suggestions on what to do that could help me feel not so fat and gross???
[Help] I have to go to a restaurant for a birthday tomorrow and I'm terrified
/u/pinotblanc [5'3 | GW:115 | 24.8 | -11 | F]
Created: Fri Sep 23 12:58:45 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/546chq/i_have_to_go_to_a_restaurant_for_a_birthday/
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It's my future father in law's birthday and we are all going to a BBQ/Southern restaurant for it. I havent eaten in 3 days and I've lost 8 pounds. If i dont eat tomorrow I will get harassed and berated. I've already checked the menu a million times and the healthiest thing is a club salad with bacon, tortilla strips, and a butt load of ranch.
The thought of eating **at all** gives me an anxiety attack.... I'm not sure what to do or how to handle this. There will be 13 other people there.
Anyone else been in this situation?
[Tip] Amazing desert under 200 calories
/u/hazelconner [5'4" | 179.6 | 34.0% BF | -10.4 | X/F]
Created: Fri Sep 23 12:40:44 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54697s/amazing_desert_under_200_calories/
---
Makes 4 servings
1 tub Lite Cool Whip
1 6oz yogurt, your choice of flavor.
4 graham crackers.
Mix yogurt and cool whip until blended.
Crush crackers and sprinkle on top.
It's full of nasty cool whip chemicals but it's so tasty, so customizable, and I don't feel like a piggy if I eat it.
*dessert
[Rant/Rave] Not sure why I thought I'd be different this time...
/u/kooraloo [5'2 | fat as fuck | F]
Created: Fri Sep 23 12:08:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/54635r/not_sure_why_i_thought_id_be_different_this_time/
---
Had a week long binge, which was horrifying to log. But yesterday my stupid ass for whatever reason thought it would be a good idea to buy my usual binge trigger foods as a test of will, or something? And I lasted a whole 5 minutes... And the scale is up 5 pounds. yay.
[Tip] So I made fiberOne waffles this morning. My life is now waffleizing everything. (135 cals ish)
/u/Nude-prude [5"6.5 | 103.4 lbls | 16.42|-40| female]
Created: Fri Sep 23 10:55:30 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/545phx/so_i_made_fiberone_waffles_this_morning_my_life/
---
http://imgur.com/d0wyxrd
[Rant/Rave] Now that I'm here, it doesn't mean much to me
/u/justaddveggies
Created: Fri Sep 23 10:48:38 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/545o7y/now_that_im_here_it_doesnt_mean_much_to_me/
---
http://i.imgur.com/Fj9lyiS.jpg
[Thinspo] Male thinspo
/u/Navelpudding [5' 6" | 185 | -65 | F]
Created: Fri Sep 23 10:39:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/545mlc/male_thinspo/
---
https://i.redd.it/dqjh9k8f2bnx.jpg
[Goal] Another edition of "stupid things im kind of proud of"
/u/goddamnroommate [5'6" | 143.8 | 23.30 | -50ish | F]
Created: Fri Sep 23 10:32:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/545las/another_edition_of_stupid_things_im_kind_of_proud/
---
So I would love to fast on my own more than i do. But i rely way too heavily on EC stacking. I used to follow the recommended dosage, and on a good day, i will. But when im really off the deep end, i might end up doubling or trippling it. I guess i do this because i lack the confidence to carry through a fast on my own. I think it also has to do with how out of it i become. Either way, it's kind of a problem. Today, however, i have now had about 13 hrs since i last ate and im comfortably empty, and i dont feel the need to eat for another 2 hrs. I know this is nothing for you fasting pros, but it's the little things, even if it's only for today.
[Discussion] Daily Food Diary! September 23, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Fri Sep 23 10:02:42 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/545fgq/daily_food_diary_september_23_2016/
---
This is a daily food diary thread for September 23, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
[Other] Hey lovelies
/u/AmAlreadyGoingToHell [H: 5"8 W: 129 GW: 110 F]
Created: Fri Sep 23 10:00:55 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/545f4v/hey_lovelies/
---
Some may have noticed I've been less active lately. Or probably not.
I just want to say thank you for the support I recieved here. This is my goodbye. I hope you all get what you deserve, it's a lot y'know. I'm proud I was once part of this community. Thank you.
[Help] Will I still lose on 1100 a day?
/u/DenyMyHunger [5'7"| Fat! | UGW:112| F]
Created: Fri Sep 23 09:51:07 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/545dd7/will_i_still_lose_on_1100_a_day/
---
So I've been sticking to 800 or less calories all week (most days around 600-650) but tonight I'm having a cocktail night with a few friends and tallying up the calories (including a small meal before hand so I don't get sloppy drunk), it comes to 3500 calories for today making my total average this week 1097 cals. Should I still lose when I weigh myself on Monday if that's my daily average for the week? Don't really want to cut down on the alcohol for tonight. I need this. It's been so long.
Thanks lovelies <3
[Discussion] On buying clothes
/u/hazelconner [5'4" | 179.6 | 34.0% BF | -10.4 | X/F]
Created: Fri Sep 23 09:36:10 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/545ain/on_buying_clothes/
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So I have a clothing. Problem. I don't think I like anything I own. Getting dressed sucks.
Problem is I have a ton of clothing I don't wear and I'm gonna just donate a bunch.
But I want to buy new stuff to wear now. But (a lot of buts) I don't want to buy new stuff until I'm closer to my goal.
I don't know what to do. Is clothes shopping this stressful for everyone
[Thinspo] restricting this week!
/u/clamshells [5'7 | 115 | 18.0 | f]
Created: Fri Sep 23 09:14:01 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5456h2/restricting_this_week/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/8f1b3fbbc2854957a9809fb3a7368bf7?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=86bf0b32990c13a948bd0e683c328e95
[Help] Drinking help
/u/hopedarawrasaurus [5'2"| 150 | 28 | -29 | F]
Created: Fri Sep 23 09:11:00 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5455xy/drinking_help/
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How does everyone here deal with drinking? Alcohol has so many calories, but I am in college and I want to go out and going to giant all campus parties is only fun when you're drunk. Plus when I'm sober I way too self conscious to dance or talk to anyone... Tonight there is a huge party and I'm planning on not eating dinner (can drink less because I will get drunk faster) and working out for longer (because I totally get the drunk munchies). Any other tips to keep the calorie count low during a night out?
[Rant/Rave] I think I broke my toe...
/u/bookofbluesysaturday [5'7 | 143 | 22.3 | -29 | F]
Created: Fri Sep 23 09:00:22 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5453zh/i_think_i_broke_my_toe/
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I walked into the edge of a wall this morning in a sleepy stupor and I'm pretty sure I broke one of my toes, which means I have to take a break from running to let it heal. I'm so angry.
I was getting to the point where I could comfortably run 5 miles at a time, three times a week. It took so long to get there and now I'm going to lose that progress because I'm such a clumsy cow. I also have a job that requires me to be on my feet for long periods of time, and I can't afford to take off so I'm just going to have to be in pain and it's probably going to take forever to heal.
On top of that, I have been eating awfully lately. I gained three real pounds and then plateaued and the scale hasn't budged all week.
I'm so frustrated, I just want to cry. I think I'm going to fast for the next few days.
[Discussion] What is your best fall thinspo?
/u/itsybitsyelephant [5'2 | CW 118 | GW 105]
Created: Fri Sep 23 08:50:23 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/545282/what_is_your_best_fall_thinspo/
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Soooo getting into fall now and I'd really like to see some fall thinspo!
[Discussion] Does anyone here only buy low-calorie/diet foods?
/u/itsybitsyelephant [5'2 | CW 118 | GW 105]
Created: Fri Sep 23 08:29:07 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/544ykx/does_anyone_here_only_buy_lowcaloriediet_foods/
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How does it make you feel?
I love pulling out my low-calorie meals and I just sorta.. feel smug eating them. Like I'm oh so aware of what's going into my body while most people haven't got a clue. Am I a bad person because I feel better than them?
I love walking into my kitchen and seeing I have so many low-calorie options. Even junk-food-ish foods! But they're low calorie!
[Rant/Rave] 3 lbs from next GW.. so I'm fasting for 3 days!
/u/itsybitsyelephant [5'2 | CW 118 | GW 105]
Created: Fri Sep 23 08:26:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/544y56/3_lbs_from_next_gw_so_im_fasting_for_3_days/
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I'm so excited to do this! It wasn't planned, but I woke up like fuck it, I'm fasting today! I'll be 115 :) My UGW is either 105 or 110 depending on what I look like. Wooo! Hopefully this goes well.
[Goal] Size 2???
/u/c_marier [5'6"| 112 | 18.1 | -13 | 22F]
Created: Fri Sep 23 07:24:34 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/544odt/size_2/
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I went shopping the other day (at Goodwill lol because I'm broke/a cheapskate) and I usually look in the 6 section for pants, but they all looked giant and baggy (weird because I usually end up buying all of my clothing at least a size too big anyway because baggy clothing = hiding = thank God no one can see the ick that's my body), so I meandered down to the 4 section and the waists there were too big so I tried ON SIZE 2s AND THEY FREAKING FIT, LIKE A LITTLE SNUG BUT THEY FIT.
...
It doesn't feel as good as it should. I mean, I'm super happy, but at the same time, it's like I'm upset at the clothing for lying to me? I don't think size 2 is an accurate measurement of my body. Size 2 doesn't seem as small as it's supposed to. Even if I fit into several different brands of size 2, I still look lumpy and shapeless and fat and nothing like the models who claim to be size 2. Damn vanity sizing ugh.
[Meme/Humor] We had a charity cake sale at work and MFP doesn't understand my post-binge predicament
/u/skinnypod [5'6" | 121 | 19.8 | F]
Created: Fri Sep 23 06:47:13 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/544ils/we_had_a_charity_cake_sale_at_work_and_mfp_doesnt/
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http://imgur.com/b6ItzYk
[Thinspo] Obesity: The Post Mortem [link to show on BBC iPlayer, available UK only] - Not for the squeamish, and definitely NSFW
/u/FakingReallyWell [5'5.5" | 134 lbs | 22.1 | -22 lbs | F]
Created: Fri Sep 23 06:16:36 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/544eap/obesity_the_post_mortem_link_to_show_on_bbc/
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http://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/p046n462/obesity-the-post-mortem?suggid=p046n462
[Discussion] Weekly Selfie, Progress Pic and OOTD Thread! September 23, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Fri Sep 23 06:03:11 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/544cfy/weekly_selfie_progress_pic_and_ootd_thread/
---
This is the weekly picture thread for September 23, 2016.
Feel free to share your selfies, progress pics or outfit-of-the-day (OOTD) pics in this thread!
**Rules**
1. Be nice, **or you will be banned.**
2. Please use [imgur](http://imgur.com/) as a host.
Consider adding commentary on featured brands, sizing, inspiration behind your OOTD (trying to look thin or cover up weightloss, etc.)!
**Remember that anyone can view the contents of this thread even if they are banned from this subreddit. If you receive unwanted messages, please contact the mods with a screenshot of the relevant messages. Note that even if we ban people, they can still message you, and they still have access to the contents of this subreddit. The best thing for you to do is to block them.**
*****
Selfie, progress pic and OOTD threads are posted every Friday.
Have any questions or concerns? Comment below, or [PM the mods.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FproED)
[Rant/Rave] Little things that piss me off...
/u/rukittenmerightnow
Created: Fri Sep 23 05:37:11 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5449fu/little_things_that_piss_me_off/
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At school, about a year ago, I forgot my lunch one day, and I didn't really care. Then, a lunchroom supervised actually came up to me and asked me why I didn't have a lunch, and I said I forgot it. She started freaking out and stuff and then I said
"I'm not gonna die from missing *one* meal"
Oh that just made her flip out even more, saying that I *NEEDED* to have three square meals a day!!!1! Etc etc
Ugh it just pisses me off because our culture is so obsessed with eating that it's somehow wrong to go more than a couple hours without food.
[Discussion] DAE feel like they can't enjoy certain interests or hobbies when recovering because they've become "ed"-fied?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Sep 23 05:31:37 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5448sd/dae_feel_like_they_cant_enjoy_certain_interests/
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[deleted]
[Other] Wrote a short poem about my ED
/u/mild-rose [5'11 | 143.8 |19.42 | not enough | f]
Created: Fri Sep 23 04:00:25 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/543zhr/wrote_a_short_poem_about_my_ed/
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You’re trying to find god in the hollows of your cheeks tonight
hunched over the mirror sallow light illuminating.
Cassandra, did they listen to you when you begged?
tore your walls down all for the sin of foresight.
Woman as original sin, woman as madness, woman as disaster zone.
Crane your neck, is there divinity in starvation
is this your sacrament going unheard
You’ve always offered your body up, here is a higher cause for you.
Troy’s walls come down, your dinner comes up-
Eve counted the calories in every bite of apple.
(super nervous about posting this omg)
[Discussion] My psychiatrist gave me Ritalin LA
/u/lightfeathers [5'4" | CW 114 | GW 95 | F]
Created: Fri Sep 23 03:34:39 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/543x45/my_psychiatrist_gave_me_ritalin_la/
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It's 20mg per tablet and idk if it's working. Appetite is close to nonexistent but I don't feel focused or anything.
I did drink coffee after taking it this morning and I felt restless.
Can anyone share their experiences with stimulants?
[Other] Kind of an odd question
/u/xcris19x [5'3 | FATFATFAT | Fat | F| UGW: 100/105]
Created: Fri Sep 23 03:19:49 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/543vo5/kind_of_an_odd_question/
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**EDIT**: answered. Thank you all.
Odd question, my apologies for phrasing, I'm not sure how else to ask it.
Does anyone know if I wear a waist trimmer belt and/or workout gear, say like, all day or with every outfit (ie: workout pants to work, or under another pair of pants) and a waist trimmer belt (always wrapped around) - if that will help with weight loss/inches lost/toning when I'm not working out? Obviously I'm not expecting mega results but I did it in the past and I can't make heads or tails of if it actually helped or not.
Thanks in advance.
[Meme/Humor] She gets us.
/u/tryingtocutback
Created: Fri Sep 23 02:23:14 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/543qps/she_gets_us/
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http://imgur.com/gallery/1j15k
[Tip] Food tip! Powdered peanut butter + powdered hot chocolate = Reese's peanut butter cup
/u/lord_pterodactyl [5'2" | GW: 100 lbs | -4lbs | F]
Created: Fri Sep 23 02:12:00 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/543ps3/food_tip_powdered_peanut_butter_powdered_hot/
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PB2 or, what I used, Tru-Nut powdered peanut butter. I put in 2 tbsp, which is 45 calories, mixed it with a packet of powdered hot chocolate (mine was 100 calories but I'm sure there's lower calorie ones) and a bit of water. It tastes just like a Reese's peanut butter cup. I put mine in the freezer as a frozen treat. It's seriously so good.
[Rant/Rave] Today was a really "off" day :(
/u/yellowlettuce [5'9" | CW:152 GW:125 | -83lbs ]
Created: Fri Sep 23 00:59:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/543j2e/today_was_a_really_off_day/
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Not sure exactly what it was.
I kept getting glimpses of my body in the reflections of windows at school, and I just got this really gross feeling in the pit my my stomach whenever I would see myself. As i was trying out different outfits this morning, i just wanted to cry because everything I tried on just showed every fucking lump on my body. I just want to pinch it and cut it off with scissors honestly. I used to have these days all the time, but haven't had one in a couple of weeks. I think that's why today was so hard.
Despite all of this, I still ate today. Less than usual, less than 1,000, but not much less.
I also don't really have a social life anymore. I have maybe two friends, and I only hang out with one of them. So I don't really know how to talk to people anymore?
Just thinking about all of this is frustrating.
[Intro] binged and purged again for the first time in years :(
/u/nukemily [5'2 | 129 | 23.59 | -4 | 15F]
Created: Thu Sep 22 21:25:48 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/542ujq/binged_and_purged_again_for_the_first_time_in/
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alt account bc people i know know my others.
i haven't purged in years. binging tho, constantly. i'm about a month in to cico and tracking and exercising but i ate too much and felt nauseous and stuffed my fingers down my throat. i feel awful. i'm so fat and fucking up my own progress. so hi i'm here to feel less horrible and unlovable
[Intro] Losing my hair and hi I'm new
/u/HistrionicSlut
Created: Thu Sep 22 21:19:59 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/542tst/losing_my_hair_and_hi_im_new/
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Like the titles says. Hello. I am new here :)
I'm gonna post a quick synopsis of my story and then ask a question.
So throughout my life I've had what I think is binge eating disorder. I ate everything when I was upset. Two years ago I decided to get my life back on track and I lost 75lbs in 8 months! Because I simply didn't eat. Sometimes for 2-3 days at a time. I still had 100lbs more to go before I even got to a healthy range. Well when I did this I lost all my hair. I was almost bald. This caused a bad depression and my boyfriend practically forced me to eat. In the next year I gained it all back :(
That's brings me to now. I have no control problems anymore, I can go without food for days. But how can I stop from losing my hair?!?! I'm just starting to get it back! And I really want to be thin and pretty 😕
I can't flair because I'm mobile. And TIA!
[Intro] intro (:
/u/literallytoki [5'2in | 143lbs | 27% | -2lbs | NB]
Created: Thu Sep 22 20:49:36 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/542pm8/intro/
---
Hey you cool people!
Long time lurker, I just started commenting on posts and decided I should probably introduce myself. I'll flair this as soon as I can figure out how to (I'm on mobile).
I don't use my real name online, so you can call me Toki or LiterallyToki it's whatever haha.
I'm 21 now, 22 in a few months. I just had my second anniversary to the wonderful man of my life.
I started noticing that I had a problem with food when I was very young, 11 or 12. I was only around 100lbs then, but as I grew up, I grew out and I got these huge thighs. Like, I have an ass that won't quit, but I want to fire it. Also I'm bad at metaphors. My main problem with my body is my thighs, and my main problem with my diet is soda... Dr. Pepper is my life blood.
My upper body is so small, and I can't figure out how to get the weight off my legs, and at 140-ish pounds, they need to go. I hate it so much.
I was doing pretty good at eating "normally" until I got a tooth problem. I still have some baby teeth (thanks genetics) and one of them finally decided "hey, i don't belong here" and now it hurts like hell. So I can't eat. Physically cannot. And I. Love. It. No one is asking me questions except for "is your tooth acting up?" and its so easy to just play it off.
I'm starting to lose a little weight, 1-2 lbs here and there, but even with measurements I can't tell where its coming off of! I just want my thighs gone! I've tried running, jogging, biking, yoga, nothing even tones it!
Well, I'll save the rest for a rant post later, love you all <3
edit: shoutout to the mods for such a friendly bot that helped me flair this (:
[Rant/Rave] The motivation I need, I guess...
/u/thatonegirlfrommath [5'5" | 131.2 | 21.8 | F]
Created: Thu Sep 22 20:35:55 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/542nj7/the_motivation_i_need_i_guess/
---
Today I found out that my boyfriend of two years has a wife. I'm the mistress. I cannot believe how fucking stupid I've been and how this happened.
I feel angry and numb. I want to waste away out of spite. I want to be thin and gorgeous and show him what he fucking lost. I want to call the other woman and apologize. I had no idea.
[Discussion] Let's talk Fall!
/u/Navelpudding [5' 6" | 185 | -65 | F]
Created: Thu Sep 22 20:23:33 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/542lnq/lets_talk_fall/
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I'm SO feeling fall right now, maybe because there's a nice fall breeze and I'm ~~trapped~~ sitting outside.
How do you stay warm? Anything you're looking forward to, or not looking forward to ~~Thanksgiving binges~~? Favorite fall food?
[Help] Has anyone exercised while fasting?
/u/fairyspice [5'3" | 112 | 19.8 | GW 105 | F]
Created: Thu Sep 22 20:07:33 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/542jdt/has_anyone_exercised_while_fasting/
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I seriously screwed up the last 24 hours and want to fast tomorrow and maybe saturday. I'm considering spending a good amount of the day at the gym to burn as many cals as possible but i've never done long workouts while fasting. Any tips or advice?
[Rant/Rave] I'm struggling with laxative abuse
/u/H2OandCaffeine [5ft7 | FAT | -20 lbs | F]
Created: Thu Sep 22 20:01:37 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/542ihl/im_struggling_with_laxative_abuse/
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One of my friends found out and found out I look at thinspo and she straight up said if I keep it up she's going to break off the friendship. It's really stressing me out. It happened last week and it has made me lose control and binge almost every day this week. I just want to lose laxatives. I know there's no way she'd know. But I would hate to lie to her. I guess I'm going to have to learn to lie better though. I dunno. It sucks. Between that fueling binges and medications requiring that I eat with them else I face an hour and a half of severe nausea after taking it I have been eating way too much and I'm so unhappy. I just want to be empty and I feel like I'm not allowed to be happy.
[Discussion] How does everyone feel about meanspo? (Possible TW)
/u/Missy_Is_Bitter [5'3"| 183.4.0 | -32lbs | F]
Created: Thu Sep 22 20:01:32 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/542ih1/how_does_everyone_feel_about_meanspo_possible_tw/
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I'm just kind of curious, because personally it's something that I crave. I don't think this violates any of the rules but if it does I will take it down immediately. <3 I don't want to hurt anyone and I know this can be a crazy sensitive topic.
I absolutely do not condone saying mean things about other peoples bodies just out of spite. Everyone has the potential to be suffering with their self image, and I think making negative comments is especially a terrible thing to do to someone with any sort of disorder. I always feel like a horrible person just for even thinking mildly negative things about other people, and wouldn't ever, ever, ever make comments like that unsolicited.
But there is a big part of me that wants people to constantly say nasty things to me. Being belittled and made fun of is super triggering, and it sort of validates all of the nasty things I think about myself. Like, I fucking hate myself and my body, and I feel very deeply like other people should (and do) hate me too. I want them to lash out and me and spew venomous things. If people say terrible things about me it feels like motivation to change those things. It proves that all the terrible things I think about are completely and utterly and undeniably true, and that I am just a worthless sack of human garbage.
Like it's gotten so bad lately that I've started posting on my tumblr asking for people to verbally abuse me. I've been thinking about posting on some of meaner judgy subreddits like roastme or rateme or whatever. I feel like I desperately need the abuse to keep on track.
Part of it might stem from some scaring due to being in a fucked up abusive relationship that totally destroyed my sense of self worth and not really knowing how to function without that, but I don't know if it's actually that or if I'm just beyond fucked up.
I'm really sorry if this is upsetting to anyone. And I'm not at all asking you guys to be mean to me because I feel like this sub is about supporting each other in our disordered habits. That sort of behavior really shouldn't take place here and it's a slippery slope into creating a toxic environment which would be really sad and I don't want that for anyone. I just sort of want other opinions on the topic. <3
[Meme/Humor] who needs food
/u/gin-and-lemon [🐝 5'1"| cw: 155lbs | bmi: 30 | -7lbs | f ]
Created: Thu Sep 22 19:46:33 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/542gbt/who_needs_food/
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when you can get your daily calories from wine?????
^honestly ^^such ^^^a ^^^good ^^^^trade ^^^^off
[Rant/Rave] GAINED a lb and feeling so discouraged :(
/u/onlyroom_forthin [5'6 | CW:151.4.0 | 24.57 | SW:165 | UGW:120 | F]
Created: Thu Sep 22 19:44:17 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/542fzo/gained_a_lb_and_feeling_so_discouraged/
---
I weighed 165 a month ago and just hated it so much I've been avoiding my scale, but when I weighed myself last week I was down to 157 so I was really happy. Even though it's not a lot it just felt good to be under 160. Today I weighed myself hoping I would be down to 155, but I was prepared to still be at 157. Instead I'm UP to 158. I know it's only one pound, but it's a whole pound in the wrong direction and I feel like shit :(
After dinner tonight I'm at 1000 cals in and I worked out and walked a ton today, so I'm not going to have anything else besides water and tea. Tomorrow I am going on a hike and I know I'll have to eat while we're out or I'll pass out, but I'm hoping to just have some trail mix and then have the same thing I had for dinner tonight (300 cals for like a huge plate of food) and call it a day.
I just don't know what else to do. I weigh everything I eat. I always have my phone, so I make myself enter all my food before I can eat to make sure I don't go over. I workout 6 days a week for 30-60 minutes. I could start running again but I live in a bad neighborhood so I don't know where to run, and I've been having knee problems that I'm worried will get worse if I run. I already have to ice it after every workout :(
Sorry this is so long and maybe not well written, I'm just so frustrated. I just moved to a new state for school that is really well known for being very outdoorsy/active/healthy and every time I see all these tiny, fit, active girls around me I just feel like shit.
[Rant/Rave] OMGOMGOMGOMG just ordered delivery food for the first time in YEARS
/u/cannibale101 [5'4 | HW:150smtg | CW: heh | GW:108 | 28F]
Created: Thu Sep 22 19:38:15 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/542f43/omgomgomgomg_just_ordered_delivery_food_for_the/
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I'm a little drunk and very happy and looking forward to it (Indian fooooooood GOOD GOD is it nice to eat) but in the mean time i'm soooooo conflicted O_O Holy fuck
I've been so damn good in the last weeks, my bf was out of town and i had A LOT of work so i just fasted and fasted and fasted more, at a point where i barely remember how someone could just eat every waking day hahah it makes no sense at all
But yeah, well this is my first day off in 15 days of working 10-12hrs/day and all i can think of is watching shows and sleeping and eating. Honestly, this feels great. But i know i'll regret it and hate myself for it, especially when i've lost like 10lbs in the last 2-3 weeks and am dangerously approaching my LW that i hadn't seen in like 10 years :D
Dammit, what is this life about.
EDIT : I even dressed up for the delivery person. To make believe i'm still an adequate, civilized woman after all. That's how pathetic i am - *nice*
[Rant/Rave] Does anyone else feel shocked to look at themselves after looking at thinspo?
/u/OperatingOnScientist [5'3 | 128.6lbs | 23.41 | F | UGW 100lbs]
Created: Thu Sep 22 19:19:19 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/542cez/does_anyone_else_feel_shocked_to_look_at/
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Whenever I look at thinspo, I can imagine myself being that thin and elegant and lovely. Then when I look down, I see my big tummy and it's a huge surprise to me for some reason! I always get so frustrated. Every. Single. Time. Am I the only one who experiences this? :(
[Other] Vice Munchies Fuel Series: Counting Calories with a Ballerina
/u/bacongains [🎃🍫🍬 | 18.17 | F]
Created: Thu Sep 22 19:11:29 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/542b5b/vice_munchies_fuel_series_counting_calories_with/
---
https://youtu.be/5356zt0JiDY?list=PLnPDn1Lb79JGNDpy0fzbWZLtXdfFQozJf
[Rant/Rave] Can't talk about anti-FA, going to lose friends if I do...
/u/hazelconner [5'4" | 179.6 | 34.0% BF | -10.4 | X/F]
Created: Thu Sep 22 19:10:30 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/542azp/cant_talk_about_antifa_going_to_lose_friends_if_i/
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I'm really bummed out because I have no one I can talk to about anti-FA stuff, and to be honest that's what's keeping me going right now, keeping me focused on the fact that I can stop being a fatty.
But the problem is I tend to run with a really progressive crowd. And a lot of tumblrs that I come across that are anti-FA are homophobic or transphobic or binarist, or racist or islamophobic... and it makes me feel alone.
I feel alone in all circles. I have no one to talk to.
[Help] sorry for the dumb question
/u/hereyesarethesky [5'6" | 134.8 | 21.86 | -22 | UGW: 105]
Created: Thu Sep 22 18:29:18 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5424v5/sorry_for_the_dumb_question/
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but what exactly is water weight? or.. not what is it, because i think i understand it (retained water), but how does drinking MORE water help decrease it? wouldn't that just give your body more to retain? :0
[Help] Scientifically speaking, what is the highest amount that water weight can account for?
/u/rukittenmerightnow
Created: Thu Sep 22 16:57:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/541qwx/scientifically_speaking_what_is_the_highest/
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In the last 3 weeks I have been restricting to around 500 cals a day, and I've lost 6 lbs. It seems to be coming off too fast to be realistic. I've been trying to drink lots of water and tea and coffee, but I'm pretty sure most of it is water weight.
[Intro] Intro!!
/u/harleygore [5'8 | CW: 189 | GW: 170 | UGW: 110 | Female]
Created: Thu Sep 22 16:43:01 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/541ol3/intro/
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[removed]
[Goal] Punishment for myself
/u/toastyhigh [5'3.5 | 108.5| F]
Created: Thu Sep 22 15:58:52 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/541h57/punishment_for_myself/
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I binged and ate around 2000 calories yesterday for no fucking reason. I'm gonna do a water fast as punishment. For as long as I can. I'm just so mad. I like being in control and when I don't feel in control....well that really ticks me off. It was going well before and I was proud of myself. My goal is to lose at least 2 pounds by the end of my fast but I heard you can lose around 3-3.5 on a multi day fast after a small binge. I've never fasted more than two days, so I'll keep updates!
Start date: Thursday at 5:30 AM
Update: Currently 36 hours, 15 minutes in. The first day had more hunger cravings, today is much better.
Update: Currently 63 hours, 14 minutes in. Can't find a scale so I don't know how much I lost which is really annoying me. I'm not quite hungry, just have random urges to binge and purge. Still, I feel a lot skinnier.
[Goal] Feels really good...
/u/salamanderqueen [5'9"| CW: 149 | SW: 180 | GW: 120 | -31 | 19F]
Created: Thu Sep 22 15:51:36 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/541fvd/feels_really_good/
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To have to buy belts because all of my pants are too big.
[Thinspo] I wish I was pretty like these people
/u/eightstone [Height: 5ft 7 | CW: 9st 12lbs| BMI: 21 | Gender: F]
Created: Thu Sep 22 14:26:53 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5410xy/i_wish_i_was_pretty_like_these_people/
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http://imgur.com/gallery/FxTBz
[Rant/Rave] I broke my fast intentionally today
/u/eightstone [Height: 5ft 7 | CW: 9st 12lbs| BMI: 21 | Gender: F]
Created: Thu Sep 22 14:11:56 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/540y9b/i_broke_my_fast_intentionally_today/
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I only ate 500 calories but I now feel stuffed and obese.
[Goal] Not much, but my motivation to get through the last 5hrs of a 20hr fast
/u/goddamnroommate [5'6" | 143.8 | 23.30 | -50ish | F]
Created: Thu Sep 22 13:43:21 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/540t51/not_much_but_my_motivation_to_get_through_the/
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I cant fast full day because i ate late last night and im fasting because i dont want to worry overmuch about calories on date night.
Anyway, i like to think about:
How small i'll feel when he holds me in his arms
How strong it will make him feel to basically envelop me
How my ribcage feels against his chest
How he holds and caresses my hipbones
How thin ill look in my new shirt without any food inside of me
I know these were super guy-focused, but hey, it's date night and the immediacy of it is helping me
[Discussion] Thoughts on Onision and Eugenia Cooney?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Sep 22 13:19:06 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/540opb/thoughts_on_onision_and_eugenia_cooney/
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For those who don't know, [Eugenia Cooney](https://i.ytimg.com/vi/iO7jjdl30Ek/maxresdefault.jpg) is a YouTuber and YouNow streamer who makes fashion and makeup videos, and is also known for being extremely skinny. Most people who watch her videos believe she has an eating disorder, with a few encouraging this but most insisting that she needs help. Onision is another YouTuber who latches onto anything happening on YouTube and talks about it.
Onision has made several videos asking Eugenia to get help recently, and recently made one with the more aggressive stance of "get help NOW or everyone who sees this will unfollow you". [Here's his most recent one.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y99illjweZk) Eugenia [tweeted about it today.](https://twitter.com/Eugenia_Cooney/status/778996740967936000) Other YouTubers have also started speaking up about their concern for her.
Just wondering how other disordered folks feel about this; Eugenia has been thinspo for me for a long time, so it's surprising to see so many YouTubers suddenly pop up to talk about her. Personally, I support her right to eat as much or as little as she wants, but I don't want her to die :/
[Here's](https://twitter.com/Eugenia_Cooney/status/776899764403118080) how she looks at the moment.
[Discussion] Motivation tool: I'm going to post here at least once day
/u/matchstick_mind [5'0 | CW: 96.4lbs | GW: 84lbs | BMI: 19.83 | 21/F]
Created: Thu Sep 22 13:17:53 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/540ohv/motivation_tool_im_going_to_post_here_at_least/
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I find that merely lurking isn't enough to keep my mind on restricting. So to remedy that, I'm going to make a post or comment on a thread at least once a day. I find that things that work for other people (thinspo pictures, before and afters, stuff like that) aren't very motivating to me.
What is motivating to me is engaging with the community here. Talking about experiences, giving advice, venting about problems. Being immersed in this subreddit makes me feel like I have enough strength to not eat for a day, or at least eat very little. I also find that if I binge one day, I don't want to go on this subreddit because it feels like I've let you guys down, haha. Idk if anyone else feels like this.
What kind of unusual motivation tools do you guys use?
**Edit:** bit more info
[Rant/Rave] My colleagues said they're worried about me
/u/eightstone [Height: 5ft 7 | CW: 9st 12lbs| BMI: 21 | Gender: F]
Created: Thu Sep 22 13:16:02 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/540o60/my_colleagues_said_theyre_worried_about_me/
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because they never see me eat. "of course I eat!" I said jokingly, "you don't maintain an ass like this by not eating!". They rolled their eyes and said, "you're skinny enough. you need to eat." I am so far from skinny it makes me want to cry. I feel kind of determined now to show them what skinny really is. My (superior) colleague (jokingly, I hope) demanded I send him a photo of my dinner tonight to prove I'm eating at home. I just find it remarkable that it's socially acceptable to call people out for having a small lunch at work (I was eating seaweed crisps), but you wouldn't dream of pointing out that the mayo rich sandwich of your colleague's is over 600 calories and demand that they text you a picture of the salad they're having for dinner to make up for it.
[Intro] Hello!
/u/EmpireStateBitch [5'4" | 122.4lbs | -6 | F]
Created: Thu Sep 22 13:03:20 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/540ltf/hello/
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Hi!
I've been lurking for a while and thought it was time to join the community so I could finally be able to talk about these sorts of things.
I've always been trying to lose weight, even since I was in high school and weighed maybe 100lbs. I'd eat some quinoa flakes for breakfast, throw out my lunch, and eat a small dinner. I just always thought I could do better.
When I moved after college I got caught in a bad relationship and a bunch of depression and anxiety issues and I just stopped caring. I drank a disgusting amount and didn't care what I ate, and I did gain weight. I never got *fat*, but I probably weighed 130 at the worst points.
Now I do care again. I work out too much, I eat too little, and it's compounded by the fact that I'm an amateur fighter, so I have to hit certain weights at certain times. This is advantageous in the fact that I know how to drop weight fast, and I literally HAVE to be in the gym to train. But every time I step on the scale and I'm not at weight, even weeks before the fight, it's a failure to me. If I'm not comfortably under weight before the fight, it's a failure to me. My coach told me to throw out my scale at home, so I weigh in once a week at the gym. But instead I just stopped telling him that I weigh myself every day, and based on what I see I adjust my calories for the day ahead. That number has to be smaller every day.
I currently fight at about 120, but my goal is to be 115 for my next fight, and ultimately at 110. Most of it is muscle, I look fairly slim, but I can do better.
Thank you for reading and I'm excited to be a part of this community for my journey! :)
[Goal] hit a goal weight!! ten lbs to go to my UGW
/u/ozh_esta [5'3.5" | CW 116 | GW 102 | 20.70 | -34lbs | NB]
Created: Thu Sep 22 12:49:44 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/540j9x/hit_a_goal_weight_ten_lbs_to_go_to_my_ugw/
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what became a 48 hour liquid fast finally broke me out of the 115-116 range I'd been fluttering between, and today I hit my first major goal since I hit 125 around this time last year.
I know that a lot of it is probably water weight, but waking up and seeing 112lbs for the first time since I was 11 or 12 years old was so honestly inspiring. not to mention I'm just about to get a gym membership with a gym very close to my new apartment, so it'll be even easier to keep this weight off.
I'll wait a couple of days to see if I stay around 112 before updating my flair, but if I do, that'll put my (new) BMI at just under 20 and my old one at 19.5, which is the first time I've ever been in the teens.
anyway, just wanted to share!! I'm going to savour this as much as I can before I inevitably retain water again!
[Intro] I broke my plateau weight! And an intro?
/u/IdidntChooseThis [6 ft | CW: ~120 |15.64 | -31 lbs | F]
Created: Thu Sep 22 12:34:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/540gfe/i_broke_my_plateau_weight_and_an_intro/
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Hi!
I'm Aly, I've been here for a few weeks lurking and commenting, but I've never introduced myself properly. I'm trans, I've been on hormones (MtF) for around 15 months, I don't pass as a woman, and I've been struggling with eating since last October.
I use to be the kid that went into restaurants and ordered two meals and downed them both. Super active (played basketball for hours daily), could eat whatever I want and it not effect my self-esteem (it was and is as close to 0 as you can get). Now though, I've lost my family, lost both of my siblings, lost friends, and even lost my cat since I came out and started this transition. At 18 I started to have to be a responsible adult, I payed my doctor's bills, kept my grades up (I'm at university), and managed a transition from male to female. I've been very stressed for the past year, for a month I purged every morning and after every meal. Not because of an ED, but because I was so stressed about my world crumbling around me.
Today, I broke a plateau that I have been at for the last few months. The lowest I have ever been use to be 119.0, but today I checked and double checked and now I am 118.8 *and it feels good*. I don't exercise a lot, but I walk a lot for school. I can't say I was trying to break 119, I've been trying to eat to maintain (I restrict only, no purging) since I moved out, because I know I am fucked up, but damn, it still felt good to see that weight on the scale, even if it won't ever be there again. It's awkward because I have one foot in some kind of recovery with my therapist who is making calorie track this week for her benefit.
I guess I am trying to recover, I wouldn't even say I have an eating disorder, but apparently many people who do don't believe they do either. I always felt like this was just a coping mechanism for my bigger body issues. But here I am, and it's nice to see that other people struggle with this too. It just sucks because now I am starting to have the bad side effects and it's ruining what I have left of what I use to like about myself. I really just want to be thin and pretty. And I'm not either of those things.
Anyway this got long, what I meant to say was "Hi! I'm here"
[Rant/Rave] Does anybody else stress when you have to take care of kids?
/u/winterpopp [ 5'7" | GW: <100 | F22]
Created: Thu Sep 22 12:27:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/540f43/does_anybody_else_stress_when_you_have_to_take/
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**TW** Because I'm going to be talking about stress of feeding another human/ rly bingey behavior.
My niece has been staying with me for the past week. I stress so much when she is around, about what to feed her/ how she is eating.
She is almost 5 and in a phase where she wants to be just like me, she has to eat what I'm eating, in addition to copying me about everything else. She didn't eat breakfast one day because I didn't eat, then she tried to do the same when I wouldn't eat lunch, so I made myself eat so she would. :/ After 2 days I noticed she was eating a lot less, so I forced myself to eat 3 meals and 2 snacks so she would, and my sister(her mom) lets her eat a lot of junk food, so she's kind of picky, so I've been eating chips, chicken nuggets, etc. :( (On a side note because I sound like I feed this kid nothing but crap, I make her eat fruit and/or veg with every meal, it's just that she is used to the unhealthy stuff at her house, so I can't take it ALL off of her because she just won't eat either, I've been making switches like baked organic chicken nuggets instead of Mcdonalds she is normally fed, ect)
When she has a snack she kind of "grazes" so she'll be walking around and playing for like an hour with a bag of crackers/ apples/ chips/ whatever in her hand and I just pick at it too because it is there and easy to grab without thinking.
Then one day she really wanted pizza(my absolute binge food) and she wouldn't eat unless I ate again.. so one slice turned into 4.... plus cheesesticks.
In addition to all of that, it's just so stressful to make all my food decisions PLUS all of hers. Like she drinks pop at her house, so she asks for pop when we are out. Sometimes I buy her a little bottle, but mostly I say no. She's been getting juice, milk and water. Then I feel guilty and feel like I am trying to restrict her too, and a whole nother wave of stress hits.
Sorry I just really wanted to vent about all of this. She's back with her mom so I am back on track(til the next time she's here at least). I've been too terrified to even get on the scale. Ugh.
[Discussion] Any other fans of modafinil?
/u/blasechicken [5'6" | too much | -5 | UGW 120lb | F]
Created: Thu Sep 22 12:25:48 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/540eq0/any_other_fans_of_modafinil/
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EC stacking is tempting, but caffeine makes me super jittery and anxious. I might try it in the future, but for now, I've found my love.
I've taken Adderall before, and it's great, but the way it messes with my heart rate scares me. I love modafinil because I can just take it in the morning on an empty stomach, and effortlessly fast until dinnertime. It also gives me a mood boost and subtly heightened alertness that is way more pleasant than harder stimulants can be.
It's unfortunately kind of sketchy to get in the states without a prescription, but once you get around that little detail, it's great for appetite suppression and attention. I haven't heard it mentioned around here very much - does anyone else like it?
[Thinspo] Anybody have 5'5 thinspo pictures?
/u/Peretticoffee
Created: Thu Sep 22 12:09:24 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/540bmz/anybody_have_55_thinspo_pictures/
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Pretty please?
[Help] What is an ECY stack?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Sep 22 12:03:02 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/540aej/what_is_an_ecy_stack/
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[deleted]
[Goal] Sort of trying goals
/u/chipmunknutter
Created: Thu Sep 22 11:21:36 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5402kb/sort_of_trying_goals/
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Does anyone set sort of trying goals? For example, if binging four times a week, set a goal to just binge twice rather than go cold turkey. It's clearly still problematic and seems silly to say "oh I binge but not as much as I used to" but progress not perfection I figure. It feels like a sort of stepping stone when you aren't ready to let go completely.
[Rant/Rave] Just a bit frustrated
/u/weakicedtea [26|5'7"|Fat|GW 115 lbs|F]
Created: Thu Sep 22 11:16:22 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5401n7/just_a_bit_frustrated/
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If there are 55 Goldfish crackers per serving, and 6 servings per bag, then why the fuck are there more than 330 Goldfish in this bag of crackers? Stick to the goddamn label and don't tell lies. This is why I'm fat.
(This is my first post on my new account but I've been here before on my old one, I had to delete my old one because I was about to get exposed, argh...)
[Help] Quitting cigs?
/u/iwannagetbetter96 [5'10 | CW:135 | -20 | F]
Created: Thu Sep 22 11:16:16 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5401md/quitting_cigs/
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Hey there!
I'm a long-time lurker and recent relapser, and really wanted to start contributing to the community. :) You're all lovely and kind and forgiving, this sub feels so... right? I don't know, rambling.
So has anyone ever tried to quit smoking while restricting? I always end up gaining 5-10 lbs when I quit, and I can't handle that right now. However, I do want to start exercising regularly and I can't seem to run as much when I smoke before, after, and sometimes during. And its good for health, all those benefits or whatever. Does anyone have any advice? Has anyone tried to quit smoking and failed miserably, or does it just fuel your determination to make yourself better?
For the record, I don't smoke because its an appetite suppressant (though I do love that quality about cigs lol), I just like to smoke. I refuse to get a vape (ex-bf vaped, ew). Anyways, thanks for reading. I hope to be an active user eventually! Stay strong, you're beautiful
[Discussion] Good weeks and bad weeks?
/u/ooo5936 [5'6" | 124.2lbs | GW: 115 | -8.6lbs | F]
Created: Thu Sep 22 11:12:42 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5400yt/good_weeks_and_bad_weeks/
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Does anyone have a really good week of restricting and then go through a period of like 4-5 days where they lose all the work they did?
[Help] Question about gaining during period
/u/misakocicka96
Created: Thu Sep 22 10:48:48 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53zwj8/question_about_gaining_during_period/
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Hi all! i hope this hasn't been asked already. I've been eating an average of 600 calories a day but after losing 10lbs in 2 weeks, i suddenly gained 2lbs. My period was supposed to start about now and i feel cramps, but it didn't actually start yet. Is it possible to gain weight while your body tries to have a period??
Any experiences or advice would be welcome. Thank you!! 💜
[Discussion] Weird side effects of ECY stacking? (Maybe TMI warning)
/u/DivingRightIn [72in | don't ask | don't tell | ~57.2lbs | UGW: 120lbs | F]
Created: Thu Sep 22 10:40:26 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53zv18/weird_side_effects_of_ecy_stacking_maybe_tmi/
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So I know a lot of people here EC stack, I started somewhere around a year ago, been off and on. And added Yohimbine to the mix about 2-3 months ago
Ive noticed for whatever reason when I stack I basically feel like I'm "leaking" all over my body.
My nose runs, I sweat, and I feel like my bladder leaks (disgusting ugh)
I never sweat under my arms unless I'm stacking and I have to carry tissues or my nose drips.
I know its the stacking because Ive been trying not to in the past few weeks and started again today and already feel these side effects again...
Anyone else? Does anyone know why this happens? :-( it's disgusting...
[Help] I need to either be called out or reassured..
/u/citrus_cunt [5' 9"| 139lbs | 19.5| +2lbs | F]
Created: Thu Sep 22 10:40:00 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53zuym/i_need_to_either_be_called_out_or_reassured/
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I've been doing my whole "not eating till 6, working out on an empty stomach 4 days out of the week, and bingeing on weekends" routine for two weeks now....
And I've maintained at 140. I'm going to Fucking Die. I promised I would never get back to this point and here I am! And I can't lose!! Augh!!!
But I don't want to change my plan. It makes me feel like I have more control, and helps me save my calories for late-night eating.
I'm worried that it's because I haven't been controlling my binges, or because I need to switch up the days I restrict. But then again, this could just be because in the first week my body was adjusting, and now I'm on my period. But it could also be other things??? I can't tell what's water weight, what's bloat, and what's actual weight!
Is this my impatience, or am I just not working hard enough?
[Help] Food scale recommendations?
/u/heids7 [5'7 | 103lbs | ~15.7-16 | F]
Created: Thu Sep 22 10:18:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53zqv2/food_scale_recommendations/
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Hi all! Hope your day is coming along alright :)
I'm in the market for a food scale in order to more accurately keep my calories in the desired range. I've always just sort of guesstimated how much of a certain item I've consumed, and seeing as how my weight is COMPLETE AND UTTER RAGE-INDUCING FUCKERY, I can only deduce that my estimations have been incorrect. I've never owned a food scale, so I have no clue what I'm doing when it comes to shopping for one.
So! Do any of you own one (or know of one) that would be a decent investment? I'm probably just going to order from amazon, but if somewhere brick-and-mortar has a pretty good one, I'll certainly go there.
I have no idea what the price points for these things are, but ideally nothing more than about $30-ish? I don't need any fancy-dancy bells and whistles! Though I would prefer digital, if only to ensure OCD numerical exactitude :-D
Any suggestions?
[Discussion] Daily Food Diary! September 22, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Thu Sep 22 10:02:32 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53zo20/daily_food_diary_september_22_2016/
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This is a daily food diary thread for September 22, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
[Meme/Humor] On binge days.
/u/SkinnyisSexy [5'7.6 |128.4|gw115|19.6| F]
Created: Thu Sep 22 09:52:51 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53zmao/on_binge_days/
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https://youtu.be/XJPDBClKqAM
[Help] Stupid/tmi question [help]
/u/disbeetch [5'3'' | 140 | 24.8 | -28 | F]
Created: Thu Sep 22 09:03:52 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53zdhl/stupidtmi_question_help/
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So somehow my poop schedule has changed and I can't go until a few hours after I wake up. It's fucking with my morning weigh ins and I KNOW I weigh less an hour into work and not weighing in at as low as possible every morning is fucking up my life. Any ideas on how to get it back to normal (aka first thing in the morning before I hit the scale)???
[Other] a pictorial story of loss and gain
/u/skin_ny [5'9.5" | 113.6 | 16.19 | -44 | F]
Created: Thu Sep 22 08:59:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53zcrx/a_pictorial_story_of_loss_and_gain/
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http://imgur.com/a/N6xYg
[Other] Not relevant but you guys rock.
/u/High_as_red [5'4 | F]
Created: Thu Sep 22 08:49:47 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53zb2b/not_relevant_but_you_guys_rock/
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Okay so girls of ProED, You know when a guy shows you a video of a hot girl jumping her boobs or something and then it cuts it to a baby or dog looking inlove something? Oh cummon you know what I'm talking about. Then you're supposed to laugh but the girls body made you insecure. Are there any male equivalents of this? Something I can show to a guy that is supposed to be funny but is actually a really unrealistic body that leaves him feeling empty?
[Rant/Rave] I can't imagine ever really believing that eating is an okay thing to do.
/u/smokesanddietcokes [Doesn't actually know what she's talking about.]
Created: Thu Sep 22 08:17:21 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53z5he/i_cant_imagine_ever_really_believing_that_eating/
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https://www.reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53z5he/i_cant_imagine_ever_really_believing_that_eating/
[Rant/Rave] [rant] I'll never be able to fast
/u/thinkthinlythrowaway
Created: Thu Sep 22 07:05:56 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53yua6/rant_ill_never_be_able_to_fast/
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The last two days have been actually really great. I have only had coffee and tea and water through out the day. And since I've had night class I don't get home till 7...
But I know I'll never be able to fast completely. My boyfriend and parents make sure I at least have some type of dinner.
Yesterday was even better than the day before cause I didn't have a super sugary drink and crashed. Yesterday up till like 8 all I had was a small avocado with lime.. And then my boyfriend asked how I felt and I wasn't shaky or anything...
But he asked me to have something else so I didn't get too sick
So I had cereal.. Which wasn't too bad
I think my total was 650.
Which is amazing
But I'll never be able to fast how I want... Or I can but it'll hurt the ones I love.
But god I know what you all mean now by feeling powerful when you haven't eaten anything. Usually my blood sugar gets fucked up but yesterday it was great.
[Help] Intro & Help
/u/RainyDayDaydream [5'6 | ?? | ?? | ?? | Lady]
Created: Thu Sep 22 06:03:28 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53ylfw/intro_help/
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Hello, lovely people of ProED. I've been lurking on here for a while now, and figured I would introduce myself. I've found a massive amount of comfort and support in reading the posts here. I enjoy the solidarity, the non-judgement that you get here. I have EDNOS and am an avid chewer & spitter.
I'm supposed to be 'recovering', as I am more or less 3 months out of inpatient treatment. I did not want to go to the clinic, and was forced into it. I hate the body they forced onto me at the clinic. I hate how I felt like a cow being fed 6 times per day. I dont consider myself to be 'recovering' but nor do I feel I am as 'active' in my ED as much as I was before I was admitted. I'm in this odd grey area. By the time I was admitted I had lost my mind, and was on a liquid diet, not on purpose...it just happened.
I do know that I've lost some weight since I've been out of the clinic, which I'm glad about, I feel like the progress I had made previously was absolutely ruined. I don't weigh myself, I go by how I look/feel.
Tomorrow I'm going away and seeing family, as its a birthday celebration for my grandmother. We are going to be eating. My extended family are all overweight, overeat and in general may be a bit rude to me about how I look. I think we are going to do a 3 course meal on Saturday. It's also the first time in awhile that I will be seeing a lot of my family, and now they are all aware of the fact that I have a ED.
How do I go about not ruining all of my progress but still seeming like I am pro-recovery? I am so, so nervous over this weekend. I don't know what to do. Any support/advice would be appreciated very much!
[Discussion] Weekly Emotional Support September 22, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Thu Sep 22 06:02:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53ylby/weekly_emotional_support_september_22_2016/
---
We're almost all dealing with quite stressful things outside of our eating disorders. Whether it be complicated relationships, friends, university, work or other mental illnesses like depression, anxiety or OCD, we all seem to be having a rougher time emotionally and mentally than the general population.
Use this thread to post about your problems or ask for advice concerning things other than EDs/ED behaviors.
**As always, follow the sub rules when reading or posting.**
*****
Weekly emotional well-being and support threads are posted every Thursday.
Have any questions or concerns? Comment below, or [PM the mods.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FproED)
[Intro] Newly diagnosed and done lurking (first post)
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Sep 22 05:51:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53yk4h/newly_diagnosed_and_done_lurking_first_post/
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[deleted]
[Help] How in the world did I gain on 500 calories?!
/u/qwertyidklol [5'4" | 123.0 | 21.18 | -9.3 | F]
Created: Thu Sep 22 05:00:31 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53yeat/how_in_the_world_did_i_gain_on_500_calories/
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I woke up this morning hopeful that i lost a considerate amount of weight but instead gained .4 pounds
[this is what i ate ](https://imgur.com/a/sv9EA).
how did i gain weight on this?! i usually will lose 1 pound from this daily food intake. i'm high key freaking out and frustrated.
[Help] Accidentally purging?
/u/venetianrosequartz [5'6"|CW 140|HW 153|LW 130|GW 135|UGW 112|WL -13| BMI 22.6|Female]
Created: Thu Sep 22 05:00:18 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53ye9w/accidentally_purging/
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I've really been trying not to purge but sometimes I accidentally throw up after eating a meal, even if it was only a 35 calorie fruit cup. I even sometimes throw up from the stimulation in my mouth of brushing my teeth :( Does this happen to anyone else? Is there a way to combat it?
I would tag this as discussion but mobile xoxo
Edit: aaaand I just accidentally purged again. For fuck's sake I didn't even binge I had a small 300 calorie breakfast
Worst B/P I've had in months... Just need to tell someone.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Sep 22 00:45:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53xr2s/worst_bp_ive_had_in_months_just_need_to_tell/
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[deleted]
[Help] Trying to build muscle...
/u/halftheaverageleg
Created: Wed Sep 21 23:42:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53xkoe/trying_to_build_muscle/
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I have a very bad texture problem with a lot of meat/ other foods. I am going through Physical Therapy right now with a severe knee injury. I also have problems cooking because my stove went out when I hurt myself (of course). I have a toaster oven and a microwave. But I have to eat meat to gain some more muscle or I'll never be able to run again. Or meat substitution. I'm okay with milk/potatoes/gluten. I just have to be able at least normal meals again, or else I can't gain anything back. Or meal substitutes. Recommendations?
[Rant/Rave] Worried at a new job
/u/onlyActing [5'10"| the weight is too damn high party | -35lbs | F]
Created: Wed Sep 21 22:49:27 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53xems/worried_at_a_new_job/
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I just started a new job and sadly, it's food related. I feel so useful in society, certainly isn't making the ED any worse at all. The solid foods have been surprisingly easy to not eat but coffee drinks are a little tempting (and good making all that crap is obvious how many calories are in it between sugar and fat). Luckily, or rather just the facts, my relapse has me more than used to the taste of black coffee so, that is a quick and delightful way to avoid 600 kcal in a 16 oz glass. And going to bed with the taste of good beans and goods smokes in my mouth is delightful....
Anyways, the real worry is that they will all catch on that I have a problem. Like my direct manager is a bit bigger and she has seen the big gap in my job history and knows only as much as I had a health issue. Still she had already caught on to the fact that I consider it fantastic to get to bike 1 hr to get to work and caught me walking the 2+ hrs yesterday. And I think they may find it a bit funny that I have eaten once in a week. I don't know. I'm worried about having an obvious problem. I don't know why.
[Meme/Humor] The cruelest combination in the world
/u/hazelconner [5'4" | 179.6 | 34.0% BF | -10.4 | X/F]
Created: Wed Sep 21 20:04:36 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53wrrz/the_cruelest_combination_in_the_world/
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http://i.imgur.com/NIhA2eD.jpg
[Other] Falling back into it..
/u/sossox
Created: Wed Sep 21 18:51:59 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53wgnw/falling_back_into_it/
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I logged out of this account and decided that I would give recovery and healthy eating another shot. I've had an awful week and completely abandoned everything. 2500 calories today and I purged for the first time in a while. I forgot how good being empty felt.
[Discussion] How purging ruined me...
/u/wavvvybaby
Created: Wed Sep 21 18:50:50 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53wghh/how_purging_ruined_me/
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I know this is ProED but I feel obligated to warn any of you out there who think "hey maybe i CAN eat what I want as long as I throw it up."
Well let me tell you that all the control you have with ana is GONE. Food controls you versus you being in control of food. What started as ana turned into eating meals but purging which turned into eating whatever I wanted to and purging.
One sneaky bite of pizza turns into eating a whole one because you tell yourself "I'll throw it up anyways so why not eat it all." You then sit by the toilet with a bowl to throw up in because the splashing makes too much noise. Your teeth scrape your knuckles as you heave and double over in pain. But you have to get every last bite out because if you dont...youre a big fat failure.
The problem is, most of the time you cant get it all out. You promise to never binge again. But you do it anyways.
As I sit here and type this-probably 15lbs heavier than I was at the beginning of this summer-my knuckles are raw and scabbed, my throat sore and stomach bloated. I cant think straight, my heartbeat is unusually fast and pieces of my teeth have fallen out. My hair-dont even get me started- is weak, brittle and keeps falling out. My already bad skin is pale, sallow and uneven in texture.
So is it worth it to send yourself down a path this dangerous when you already have problems with food?
No. It isnt.
[Rant/Rave] I was going to eat today
/u/pinotblanc [5'3 | GW:115 | 24.8 | -11 | F]
Created: Wed Sep 21 18:43:39 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53wfal/i_was_going_to_eat_today/
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I was going to eat some spinach and mushrooms for dinner after fasting all day but then my fiance and I got into a fight. Here's another day to not eating.
[Help] feeling hopeless and miserable
/u/crapbeg
Created: Wed Sep 21 18:41:10 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53wevd/feeling_hopeless_and_miserable/
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I just keep thinking about how shit I am at all of this. I literally cannot stop obsessing about food, and yet I binge constantly and completely sabotage myself. I've lost about 10 pounds in the last year, and that's it. It's so disgusting. I've gained so much weight over the summer, and I STILL can't stop bingeing.
I just don't think I'll ever reach my goal. I can tell that the second I get to college, the drinking and eating shit will reach new highs, and maybe I'll maintain, but I'll definitely stop losing (not like I'm really losing right now, haha). I care more about being happy & my social life than my eating stuff I guess so I probably won't cut back on the drinking, so it's entirely my own fault. I just wish there wasn't this massive trade off between losing weight and being happy.
[Help] Feeling guilty
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Sep 21 17:30:39 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53w3s2/feeling_guilty/
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[deleted]
[Intro] Intro
/u/MeraxesPestis [5'2" | 241 lbs | 45.7 | -49 lbs | GQ]
Created: Wed Sep 21 17:18:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53w1yc/intro/
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I've been lurking for about a month now so I suppose I should try & say something?
I've had issues with eating for a long time. I was a normal-sized kid until I was about 12, when I was assaulted, got pregnant, & started doing drugs. Stress + starting my cycle somehow got me up 80 lbs in a year. Food became my thing, you know? Like the one thing that could always make me feel better when everything else was falling apart. No matter how much abuse I was suffering, no matter how much I was self-harming, or how much I wanted to die, food helped pick me up long enough to stay alive through the night (despite my often best efforts to the contrary).
I started getting my life back on track, getting clean, finishing high school. I went to college with a guy I'd met at a gifted-and-talented program. He turned out to be a really horrific person--I'm talking kidnapping-type horrific. It took 18 months to get away and get safe, including losing a child, and I gained probably another 70 lbs the year after. He's ended up following me and stalking me and attacking me again in the past decade pretty much whenever he's not in prison, and every time it happens I end up back in a hospital, lying on my back being unable to do anything. He broke my spine, among other things, and for almost 10 years I've been becoming increasingly disabled to the point where I use a cane all the time and sometimes a wheelchair. It made it impossible to really lose any weight, even as I started to eat healthier--for a few years I was averaging 1200 cals a day and still gaining weight, and all my doctors could say was "eat less."
This year I moved; new town, new job, new apartment, long-term girlfriend talking about marriage, etc. Things were going really well. In July she dumped me pretty much out of the blue, and two days later I got a letter in the mail (at my new apartment in my new city) from some inmate at the state prison, only when I opened it, turns out its my ex circumventing the no-contact portion of his guilty plea by putting someone else's name on the envelope.
I thought I'd start binge-eating again, but instead I just stopped eating. Since then I've not been able to eat more that 500 cals a day and at least 4 days a week I end up fasting completely. After a decade of not being able to lose any weight, suddenly I've lost almost 40 lbs, and now I find myself not even wanting to eat. I'm so excited with the idea that my body might one day be mine again, instead of this flesh-prison built by self-hatred & abuse & disability.
Luckily I've found this sub, where I've learned some really great ways to keep myself as healthy as possible while my brain does whatever it's doing (anorexia?), & wonderful people who seem to understand that this isn't me being unhealthy so much as it's me taking my health back in a radical way.
[Help] how did you get your thigh gap?
/u/Soulsnatcher4
Created: Wed Sep 21 17:06:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53w00h/how_did_you_get_your_thigh_gap/
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[removed]
[Help] Best distractions/hobbies to keep me from eating?
/u/min_imalist
Created: Wed Sep 21 16:22:19 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53vsqu/best_distractionshobbies_to_keep_me_from_eating/
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[removed]
[Help] [help] I think I'm slipping...
/u/questions_anonymous
Created: Wed Sep 21 15:33:06 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53vkd4/help_i_think_im_slipping/
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I used to be fat, and then I lost weight, and I think I might've fallen from "innocent dieting" into disordered habits. My BMI just slid into underweight territory, and recent shopping has led to the discovery that I fit size 23 jeans, but I still feel jiggly and blubbery. I get anxious about food and calories now and I always feel the urge to plan out my meals ahead of time; if my meal plans change last minute then I either feel distraught for hours or I just refuse to eat. I don't know what to do.
[Intro] Hello. ~Intro post~
/u/Water-coffee-tea [5'9.75" | CW:120.2 lbs. | BMI:16.97 | F]
Created: Wed Sep 21 14:40:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53vb39/hello_intro_post/
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Hi,
Found this sub finally. I look around the internets occasionally for active forums, but they tend to get out of control then shut down, etc. This place is busy and seems really supportive.
tldr; I have issues. Calorie restriction, orthorexia, over exercising, drug abuse, and promiscuity, but not all at once usually. I switch symptoms with years in between.
I was in fourth grade when I realized my legs didn't look like that popular girl's legs. My mom had died 6 months prior. She was always dieting, btw, and her weight fluctuated a lot. This popular girl had visible tendons/ligaments behind her knees and was skinny. At the time I thought it was muscle, and I wanted to look like that. I started doing exercises from P.E. in my room at night.
I was in 7th grade when I started to be called fat. I wasn't. Kids are mean. I was 5'7"-5'8" and 140 lbs. I was still growing, super healthy, etc., but I felt like a giant. I was taller than all the boys my age. I went on a diet. My highest weight from 144 down to 130-135ish. No one actively called me fat anymore, but I wasn't the skinny friend either.
Enter high school and drug use, alcohol, sex, etc. Weight stayed mostly the same even though I was always trying to lose. I had a pro ana live journal for a bit. (I'm old) But without accurate calorie counts, and so much beer, I didn't lose.
I feel I should add that my feelings of low self esteem stemmed from family issues and my father actively encouraged my drug use and drinking. Me and my friends were fun drinking buddies to him, I guess.
Okay. This is getting too long. Low weight was 113 lbs. at 18-19.
Then I gained a few, started ovulating again and got pregnant. I had just married my abuser and thought that I wanted a real family.
I had never been one to binge. I'm still not, really, but during that time I gained 70 lbs. in 5 months. Wow, I was so depressed. Hormones, no friends, abusive husband, broke af, no way to cook healthy meals, all equaled Jack in the Crack meals and pastries, etc.
As soon as my child was born it came off. I went right back to restricting and since I was breastfeeding I ended up underweight again in no time. I had to give up nursing at 14 months bc my milk dried up and I was SO SICK all the time.
10 years have passed and I slowly gained a couple lbs a year until I was back at 135. "Healthy weight" But I wasn't. I was a chain smoking, binge drinking, drug using mess.
Long story. Geez. I got clean. yay. I am now remarried. yay. I have a toddler.
But a funny thing happened. My ED has come back?
I should be happy. But I'm not.
I lost weight easily after my kid was born and not drinking or smoking made me keep losing, I think, coupled with my healthy food obsession. Two months ago I finally fell below that 135 I had maintained while drinking excess calories. And it felt great!!!!
When I went below 130. When I saw 129 on the scale I new I was underweight and I loved it. I dropped to 121 in the next week or two. I accidentally triggered myself, I think.
But was it an accident? I had started reading fashion magazines again. Long avoided bc of the thinspo triggers inherent in the medium.
It's like I never stopped y'all. It's like a second skin I can just slip on so easy.
My goals are always 5 lbs less than I weigh now. An impossible, always just out of reach milestone. Right now I want to see 119, bc I remember that's when I used to get comments about being too thin.
I will theoretically keep losing until my period gets wonky. My husband would notice if I lose my cycle, so I'm going to try to keep that going. Also, I can't lose my milk yet. Trying to nurse until the baby is 2. Ugh. Gotta keep my iron up. I think I can get to 115 lbs. without losing my period based on my previous experience.
Gotta keep cooking tons of food everyday for my family, but not eat it. Honestly, I love cooking and feeding people. But I will eat some, too, to keep this whole thing private.
If you read this far. THANK YOU.
[Help] Exercise to keep butt perky while restricting & losing?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Sep 21 14:28:21 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53v8px/exercise_to_keep_butt_perky_while_restricting/
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[deleted]
[Tip] These are surprisingly substantial and only 22 cals for a whole bag.
/u/eightstone [Height: 5ft 7 | CW: 9st 12lbs| BMI: 21 | Gender: F]
Created: Wed Sep 21 13:07:10 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53uu1a/these_are_surprisingly_substantial_and_only_22/
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https://www.ocado.com/productImages/100/100329011_0_640x640.jpg?identifier=720a255c5a98d4b7b8b9e0ab31600b2a
[Help] I'm so tired.
/u/hazelconner [5'4" | 179.6 | 34.0% BF | -10.4 | X/F]
Created: Wed Sep 21 12:47:52 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53uqgz/im_so_tired/
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I'm having a tough day folks
I have a big work thing tomorrow. I've been maintaining a 1000+ calorie deficit for 16 days. But I'm starting to feel very weak.
I know logically the solution is to eat more. Maybe come up to only a 500 calorie deficit for the day. But I'm afraid that it's going to mess me up. That when I finally weigh myself Saturday I will be up again. And I just finally started coming down. :(
[Discussion] Symptom switching & perceived recovery
/u/GingerrWithASoul [5'6 | 124 | 20.09 | -24 | Female]
Created: Wed Sep 21 12:44:39 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53upwa/symptom_switching_perceived_recovery/
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I've symptom switched with my ED and other issues more times than I can count. My ED is very much just a symptom of the problems I have with myself. Non-ED related symptoms for me have been mental health struggles, substance abuse, promiscuous behaviour, and compulsive overspending to name a few.
When it comes to my ED, I've switched from restricting, to purging, to binging and purging, to binging without purging, to overexercising, to laxative abuse, restricting, etc.
I've worked hard to minimize the harm with my behaviour so I no longer purge or use laxatives. I feel like as of right now I identify more with having BED than anything else but I'm aware that my ED switches frequently.
Lately, I've been restricting and I realized that I view restriction as a form of recovery from BED. Logically and rationally, I know it's symptom switching. But BED makes me feel so out of control whereas restricting and seeing my weight going down makes me feel powerful and like I am in charge. I didn't identify with the control aspect of ED until I examined my symptom switching.
I'm not even sure what the purpose of this post is but I don't talk about my ED with people irl so I kind of just wanted to think out loud with people who understand.
Yes! Good News! (not ed related really)
/u/GoalsandGossip [5'10" | CW 181.4 | BMI 26 | GW 175 | UGW 125 | F |]
Created: Wed Sep 21 12:41:37 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53upbk/yes_good_news_not_ed_related_really/
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I had struggled to get verification that I am legally allowed to work in the US for a while. Well today I have all my documents in hand! I found a job and the business owner kinda broke some rules to help me out but I have 200 from last week going on to next weeks check now that he can pay me properly (he's been buying me grocery store gift cards and paying for my Uber rides while also documenting how much he owes me in cash). I'm so grateful for this job. I needed it so bad.
[Tip] Caffeine pills
/u/pungentthrowaway [5'1" | CW: 154 | -13 | F]
Created: Wed Sep 21 12:30:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53unb2/caffeine_pills/
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I've started taking caffeine pills most days instead of trying to get my caffeine in some kind of drink form, and it's awesome! I still love my teas and coffee and energy drinks, but I pretty much rely on caffeine as an appetite suppressant during the day, and pills have been so much more convenient. You know exactly how much caffeine you're getting - information that is for some reason mostly absent from coffee and energy drinks. The pills are very cheap. ZERO CALORIES which is an obvious benefit. I know there are zero cal caffeine options but I'm one of those people that doesn't enjoy black coffee, and energy drinks are expensive even bought in bulk. Also they're just very convenient. You can carry them on you like aspirin. You don't have to brew up a pot of anything to get your fix, etc.
Just wanted to share with other caffeine addicts here! I still drink coffee and tea and energy drinks, but I like not having to rely on those things. I only got the pills when I started EC stacking which is how I discovered how convenient they are.
[Discussion] Anyone want to talk about Adderall? I've been humbled. Open discussion about ADHD, Pills, ED, High & Withdrawals, and the corresponding emotions.
/u/depressionbunny [5'6" | 138 | 22.6 | -12 | FM]
Created: Wed Sep 21 12:29:45 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53un4t/anyone_want_to_talk_about_adderall_ive_been/
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Nothing is off the table. I'll start.
I write to you all here on r/proed because one thing about Adderall is it kills hunger. Which is completely amazing for getting through a fast. However, I inevitably binge it all back, so I don’t even get the benefits of living off just coffee for a week. Anyone know of a way to mitigate the “come down” without taking more? Haha, you know, because sleep is good ‘n stuff. I also welcome any tips on minimizing the anxiety/depression from it.
Over the years, I’ve had quite the tumultuous love affair with Addy.*(Side note: I’ve outlined my entire experience and put in the comments for those who feel like reading).* It makes me a dynamite academic. It makes me feel so creative and articulate. It gives me the work ethic of a Clydesdale…..And then it wears off… Depression, anxiety, and fatigue without the reprieve of quality sleep. Starved and exhausted from the high, my appetite is insatiable. Calories calories calories. I’ll eat all the safe food in the house, and inevitably spiral into a binge, devouring anything and everything. Too tired to care.
Rinse. Repeat.
I took an extended break this summer and into the school year. At first, everything was fine but eventually disintegrated.
Humility:
Et ceteris paribus, no matter how disciplined I try to be, I’m just better medicated. Which is humbling. The person I thought myself to inherently be does not exist in the absence of Adderall. I have a bunch of homework to catch up on now before the weekend, and hopefully it’s not too late for me to salvage a good grade…. Yeah, it’s pretty early in the semester yet. I just cannot ever lose focus again.
This time around, my goal is to stay focused on a healthy diet and exercise in addition to everything else I have to do. I don’t want to be a binge monster anymore!
I just want to be perfect.
[Tip] Do you have higher-calorie days to keep sane?
/u/bearsnbugs
Created: Wed Sep 21 12:19:49 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53ulb0/do_you_have_highercalorie_days_to_keep_sane/
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This is especially relevant to people with a past of binge-eating who are now trying to lose weight. I've noticed that my body is now very skitterish and sensitive to being put on a cut, and I am constantly afraid my binge impulses will come back if I underfeed it for too long or too severely.
[Thinspo] Another successful fasting day, another thinspo album
/u/eightstone [Height: 5ft 7 | CW: 9st 12lbs| BMI: 21 | Gender: F]
Created: Wed Sep 21 12:13:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53uk0j/another_successful_fasting_day_another_thinspo/
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http://imgur.com/gallery/YONvX
[Rant/Rave] [rant] it's the worst when loved ones don't get it
/u/thinkthinlythrowaway
Created: Wed Sep 21 11:32:38 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53ucax/rant_its_the_worst_when_loved_ones_dont_get_it/
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Lately I've been venting on here and it's actually super great and I love you all. Thank you for listening.
Anyways my boyfriend and I don't really have sex anymore. At least not like when we first started dating. And like to be fair we both work and I go to school so we're dead tired when we do see each other. But I get frustrated and I've mentioned it to him before let me say that we have like super communication I just feel like a dick when I mention it because like I feel I would have sex even if I was half asleep because it makes me happy to make him happy. And he's just not like that, he doesn't crave sex which should make me happy but when our relationship was beginning I was thinner and so my stupid brain makes me think it's the weight gain not that we aren't brand new babies who are acting like teenagers.
And I would bring all of it up again but I don't want it to be like ugh you don't fuck me crazy anymore cause I'm fat, because he works really hard to remind me that I'm not... Does that make sense?
Idk thanks for listening to the rambling
[Help] Anyone else at a lower weight experience chest pains?
/u/littleone91011 [5'4" | 103 | 17.6 | F |]
Created: Wed Sep 21 11:21:16 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53ua3g/anyone_else_at_a_lower_weight_experience_chest/
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Hi lovelies, I'm reaching out because I'm a little nervous and don't know who else to confide in about this. I've been feeling strong chest pains since last night and they've lasted all morning.
My BMI is a bit lower than my current stats indicate. Does anyone else, particularly those who are also underweight, ever experience this? Should I be concerned, or will this pass?
At work and on mobile, will flair as soon as I can.
[Rant/Rave] Stressing over cooking for other people
/u/matchstick_mind [5'0 | CW: 96.4lbs | GW: 84lbs | BMI: 19.83 | 21/F]
Created: Wed Sep 21 11:09:23 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53u7w6/stressing_over_cooking_for_other_people/
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So, I'm going to be cooking for the guy I'm seeing, plus his family. I don't mind. I like cooking. It's relaxing, and other people usually end up eating most of the food.
But his parents expect me to eat with them (I mean, duh). And I'm stressing over it. I'm making Indian food, which tends to be fairly healthy, depending on how you make it. I just...I measure everything I eat. Measuring cups, spoons, all that. But only my family knows that. I premeasure the food I take out of the house so I don't get weird looks.
I don't know how to deal with this. I usually eat 1/4 of a cup of whatever I make, and if I bring my measuring cup tonight, I'd be eating around 275 calories for dinner. But if I bring my measuring cup, I'll have to answer questions I don't want to bring up at all. And yet, if I don't bring my measuring cup, I'll either end up not eating at all out of anxiety for not knowing how many calories I'm consuming...or I'll eat too much and still have anxiety over how many calories I'm eating.
I hate being like this :/
**Edit:** I ended up eyeing it. I had maybe 1/2 cup of everything. So instead of 275 calories, it ended up being a bit over 400 (not including dessert).
[Other] I Made A Progress Tumblr Blog~
/u/Kimstephaniejane [5'5" | CW: 116 | GW: 106 | BMI: 19.3 | -18 | F]
Created: Wed Sep 21 11:04:49 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53u70n/i_made_a_progress_tumblr_blog/
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http://kimstephaniejane-diet.tumblr.com/
Follow me if you have tumblr! It would be amazing to talk to people on the same path as me :)
[Discussion] Daily Food Diary! September 21, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Wed Sep 21 10:02:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53tveo/daily_food_diary_september_21_2016/
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This is a daily food diary thread for September 21, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
I just had an enormous breakfast, and I don't even feel bad. Egg white omelet🍳
/u/mermaid_puppy [5'11" | 137lb | UGW 115 | F]
Created: Wed Sep 21 09:59:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53tuw3/i_just_had_an_enormous_breakfast_and_i_dont_even/
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http://imgur.com/a/7TXdI
[Rant/Rave] i'm so happyyyy!!!!
/u/hayleystark [5'4"|NB]
Created: Wed Sep 21 09:43:28 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53trxp/im_so_happyyyy/
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finally i have a water substitute when i get bored of it! my grocery store started carrying arizona zero w ginseng!! sooo happy and it's only 79¢ :)
[Discussion] Coffee creamer substitutes?
/u/c_marier [5'6"| 112 | 18.1 | -13 | 22F]
Created: Wed Sep 21 08:49:33 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53ti04/coffee_creamer_substitutes/
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Major coffee addict here. Usually black coffee is nbd for me, but at my new contract job, the coffee is sssoooo shitty. Tastes like burnt gasoline and I can hardly choke down one cup just for the caffeine, not to mention 3-5 throughout a day to curb my appetite. I don't have time to brew my own coffee in the morning (read: I'm too lazy and won't give up my ten minutes of lying in bed on Instagram) so I either grab gas station coffee (still shitty and needs creamer) or end up putting a few packets of (10) calorie creamers in just to make it palatable.
What are some low cal substitutes? I love half n' half in black coffee. So creamy and rich. But obviously not worthwhile. Anything that still gets that smooth texture without just watering down the coffee?
I'm moving to another contract on Monday - permanent! Here's hoping the coffee is decent...
[Thinspo] Reverse thinspo + social commentary...
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Sep 21 08:46:59 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53thkm/reverse_thinspo_social_commentary/
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http://www.theonion.com/article/nation-cant-wait-to-wake-up-and-start-eating-again-30884?utm_content=Main&utm_campaign=SF&utm_source=Facebook&utm_medium=SocialMarketing
[Discussion] What exactly is restricting to you?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Sep 21 07:29:39 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53t4qz/what_exactly_is_restricting_to_you/
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[deleted]
[Other] Yesterday wasn't a success...
/u/Mi__ra [165cm |50 kg | 18.6 | 0 | F]
Created: Wed Sep 21 07:20:10 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53t3a6/yesterday_wasnt_a_success/
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but then again, it was the first time in several months that I even *tried* not to binge and purge. I had kind of given up on it. I felt that no matter what I do, I b/p anyway, so there's no point in even trying. Now I am trying.
I think I'll take a couple of days to plan how I will quit, and after this Saturday I will quit binging and purging. I'll make a plan and stick to it. I have three days to process this change and make that plan.
I really need a change, I'm so tired with living my life this way.
[Tip] The only bad workout is the one you didn't do.
/u/smokesanddietcokes [Doesn't actually know what she's talking about.]
Created: Wed Sep 21 06:17:56 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53sug0/the_only_bad_workout_is_the_one_you_didnt_do/
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I don't want to go to the gym today. At all. It's very VERY rare for me to not shoot right out of bed desperate to go to the gym - I love the place, I love working out. I am in love with the barbell and look forward to the days I get to fondle it :P
But today, bleh. I don't want to go. At all. I'm tired and I want to fast and I'm even more tired on top of that. I feel weak and lethargic and stressed to the point of not wanting to move.
But I will go. Even just half an hours light lifting will be worth it.
The key to long term results is consistency. Whether you do great or do horribly, be consistent. That way, you WILL reach your goals even if it's slower sometimes. If you don't bother to go completely because you mistakenly think not being able to perform your best makes it not worth it.. well, your progress doesn't go slower, it just comes to a complete halt.
So I will go, even if I end up only doing one solitary set of warm-up bodyweight squats before flopping out the door because I am just that tired.
It's worth it.
[Help] I can't do this on my own but if I ask for help I just get told that I can't rely on other people all the time and I need to sort out my own problems.
/u/smallsmallersmallest [168cm | CW 50.9kg GW 46kg | 18.09 | -10.1kg | F]
Created: Wed Sep 21 06:17:34 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53sue7/i_cant_do_this_on_my_own_but_if_i_ask_for_help_i/
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I don't know what to do anymore, I feel so alone and everything I try doesn't work and it would be so easy to give up. This eating disorder is breaking me.
[Discussion] Its maybe not the end of the world.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Sep 21 06:17:12 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53sucg/its_maybe_not_the_end_of_the_world/
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[deleted]
[Discussion] Way To Go Wednesday September 21, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Wed Sep 21 06:02:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53ssji/way_to_go_wednesday_september_21_2016/
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This is the weekly achievement thread for September 21, 2016.
This weekly thread is to spotlight those achievements you feel don't necessarily warrant their own post, but you'd like to celebrate all the same. This is not limited to specifically ED-related goals; share anything you are happy about having done or accomplished recently!
*****
Achievement threads are posted every Wednesday.
Have any questions or concerns? Comment below, or [PM the mods.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FproED)
[Goal] When I weighed myself this morning I could have cried - in a good way for once!
/u/OperatingOnScientist [5'3 | 128.6lbs | 23.41 | F | UGW 100lbs]
Created: Wed Sep 21 05:45:11 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53sqfg/when_i_weighed_myself_this_morning_i_could_have/
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http://imgur.com/JZnUYnI
[Rant/Rave] Treatment is making me want to die.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Sep 21 04:39:11 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53sj9k/treatment_is_making_me_want_to_die/
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[deleted]
[Help] SUPER TMI: gastrointestinal related i guess??
/u/yellowlettuce [5'9" | CW:152 GW:125 | -83lbs ]
Created: Wed Sep 21 01:28:52 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53s1pl/super_tmi_gastrointestinal_related_i_guess/
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Ok this is so embarrassing to even bring this up but like
A few months ago, I realized I've been having trouble controlling my bowels? Also......farts? Haha.....it used to be sooo much easier to hold it all in, but now it just....isn't? I wanted to attribute it to getting older, but I'm only 19, almost 20.
I've never used laxatives, never purged, I don't binge, I'm strictly restrictive (lol)
I was just wondering if anyone else has experienced this/if it's maybe a common thing that I just didn't know about before?
(also I apologize, I didn't know how else to flair this?)
[Discussion] ED-related experience with antidepressants
/u/needsthoserockets [5'55 | 108 lb | BMI 18 | 21F]
Created: Wed Sep 21 01:01:36 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53rz0m/edrelated_experience_with_antidepressants/
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Hi lovelies... Can't flair, am on narwhal app. Intended to be a discussion post!
I know many of us in this sub have interrelated mental health issues. If you have experience with you antidepressant/antianxiety/braindrug affecting your ED, weight or appetite, please share with me!!
I've been on cirpralex (lexapro) for about a year now and it's been good, other than totally killing my libido. Seriously, I used to outpace my partner by a lot and now the idea of sex is like, nothing to me. It's frustrating and I wanted to solve it, so I asked my doc and she prescribed welliburtin to take in combo with the cirpralex.
I googled the welliburtin just now and the suggested search said "welliburtin weight loss" !!!and oh man I was excited for a second and then I realized I'm trying to maintain, kind of. I don't know.
I get that the weight loss would be almost entirely from loss of appetite, or from people being able to get out of bed and therefore increasing their TDEE. It's also obviously highly indivualized, but I'd love to read some of your experiences with your braindrugs and EDs.
: )
[Discussion] Dreams about eating?
/u/Afrikanwilddog [5'5"| 140| 23%| -8 | M]
Created: Wed Sep 21 00:54:56 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53rycz/dreams_about_eating/
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How many of you dream about eating? Well now they are more like nightmares to me, but for the past couple months, i have started to dream about eating insane amounts of food. Like last night, i dreamt that I ate a giant case of oreos with a gallon of chocolate milk. I woke up actually pretty shaken up and in the moments after, felt so relieved that it was just a dream. But these are slowly starting to become more common for me.
[Rant/Rave] I just made a huge mistake.
/u/allquiets [5'1.5 | 138 | 26.68 | -6 | 85 | GNC]
Created: Tue Sep 20 22:39:29 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53rjnr/i_just_made_a_huge_mistake/
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So I'm in the process of being diagnosed for ADHD, and in my initial meeting with my doctor, I think I accidentally gave off pretty major ED vibes, like I rambled about my weight and eating habits, because I want to be honest, but not *too* honest, if you know what I mean.
Anyways, I'm filling out the SNAP diagnostic form she gave me... and I accidentally tick a ton of the boxes for an ED. Binge eating, overeating, undereating, all of it. I think, "Oh, this must be another ADHD thing." Nope. Look across the column, in little letters: ED.
I scratched it out and filled it in again, and I think if she asks I'm going to try and play it off like I didn't understand the scale of what it meant by binge eating/undereating ("Oh, I thought it just meant, like, skipping a meal sometimes, or having one too many servings")... but an ED diagnosis is the *LAST* thing I need right now. I'm not even stressed out. I'm just numb.
It also looks like I'm clinically depressed, though, so if I am, I can just write it off for being that -- weird appetite stuff is a normal thing with depression, and, to be fair, when I'm doing really bad, my appetite can change wildly from ravenous to being utterly nauseated by food.
Step dad told me I look pregnant
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Sep 20 21:21:19 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53r9g3/step_dad_told_me_i_look_pregnant/
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[removed]
[Intro] I'm going to go back to restricting and calorie counting, because I cannot curb my suicidal thoughts.
/u/disappearqueer
Created: Tue Sep 20 21:11:52 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53r84m/im_going_to_go_back_to_restricting_and_calorie/
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I know what that sounds like, but in the past it has worked. Nothing is a powerful a distraction as hunger. I need to be distracted.
I haven't weighed myself in months. I can see at least 20lbs of gain since I was last actively restricting. So tonight I will have my "last meal", fast for tomorrow, and shoot for 800-1000 a day, then gradually decrease. In June, I was very close to my lowest adult weight, and I know I can obtain it again.
It won't fix anything that's currently wrong with my life, but I think it will help me get out of the slump I'm in.
When I'm restricting, because my brain equates weight loss with self care, I really do take better care of myself. I won't have time to ruminate over the plan for my suicide if I'm exercising and counting calories.
I guess this is just how I'll have to manage my life.
Anyway. This wasn't really an question or anything. I just needed to tell someone.
[Goal] Didn't eat out!!
/u/Superderg
Created: Tue Sep 20 20:05:55 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53qygz/didnt_eat_out/
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I wanted to order some takeout for dinner, but stepped on the scale and saw my lowest weight yet (since regaining and trying to lose again). But I was so encouraged to keep going I stayed in and ate some veggie curry instead. And now I'm watching my 600lb life to reinvigorate that desire to drop the weight and be beautiful! The girl on the show is 23 (one year younger than me) and 657 lbs! Holy shit. I can't even believe it. It's so disgusting I just want to be thin and beautiful. Keep staying lovely!!
Sorry can't flair on mobile!
[Rant/Rave] I don't want anyone else's opinion about my eating habits :)))
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Sep 20 19:56:28 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53qx4a/i_dont_want_anyone_elses_opinion_about_my_eating/
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[deleted]
[Discussion] Pro-ED/thinspo in media?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Sep 20 19:36:25 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53qu6m/proedthinspo_in_media/
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[deleted]
[Help] Weird TMI question about restricting??
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Sep 20 19:24:24 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53qsd1/weird_tmi_question_about_restricting/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] Guess who went to the hospital?!
/u/ilovepugs_ [5'6 1/2" | 149.2 | 23.7 | -4.8 | F]
Created: Tue Sep 20 19:08:25 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53qq27/guess_who_went_to_the_hospital/
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Sorry I'm posting much. Also I'm in mobile so I can't flair.
So uhm, my friends were not having it with my bullshit today. I bombed a test and honestly, I was about to blow my gas money on b/p food. So my friend texted me and was like, "lol, get yo ass back here." So I told her exactly how I felt. Crying, exposed, and vulnerable. So I started panicking...and my other friend got involved...and before you know it I had an ultimatum.
a) Go to the hospital for a psych evaluation and get the treatment I need. Consider outpatient.
b) Find a new PCP and inform my family of my eating disorder.
I should have ran out the door, but they were really worried and concerned and I felt bad and I don't want to be miserable..
so I went with a. I spent the whole day at the hospital.
Basically, they diagnosed me with Bulimia Nervosa (surprise, surprise) and they STRONGLY recommended an intensive outpatient program. I just wanted a god damn therapist to talk to and antidepressants not all this bullshit??????? That would also require me to medically withdraw from the semester. So they referred me to a therapist but they don't specialize in ED's. So now I have to find one that will accept my insurance.
I can't believe I'm officially diagnosed though. It feels unreal and I don't want it.
[Help] Trying not to unravel
/u/hazelconner [5'4" | 179.6 | 34.0% BF | -10.4 | X/F]
Created: Tue Sep 20 19:04:02 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53qpdh/trying_not_to_unravel/
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Okay. I'm in the middle of the week. And I'm trying to not get on the scale until Saturday. It rules my whole day if I get on it and I'm up.
I'm still eating at a deficit. Yesterday was my highest day at 1500 but I was at taekwondo for two hours so it brought my net down.
But this is my third week of restricting and I feel myself getting lazy. Not prepping as much food. More microwaved stuff. I'm worried about falling off the wagon.
I'm finally finally losing and I can't go back the other way.
[Discussion] Does having things being too orderly or matchy bother anyone else?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Sep 20 19:01:52 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53qp07/does_having_things_being_too_orderly_or_matchy/
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[deleted]
[Thinspo] Some end of the summer/start of the school year thinspo
/u/krebsunicycle [5'7" | 110lbs | 17.17 | F]
Created: Tue Sep 20 19:00:01 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53qooo/some_end_of_the_summerstart_of_the_school_year/
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http://imgur.com/a/OLhQl
[Rant/Rave] Lawd help me~ mini rant
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Sep 20 18:50:44 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53qnbj/lawd_help_me_mini_rant/
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[deleted]
[Thinspo] no such thing as a fat superhero
/u/hazelconner [5'4" | 179.6 | 34.0% BF | -10.4 | X/F]
Created: Tue Sep 20 17:19:47 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53q9nx/no_such_thing_as_a_fat_superhero/
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http://imgur.com/a/EhBPP
[Rant/Rave] I didn't binge even though I went over my calories for the day :D
/u/setniessesed [5'11.5" | CW: 141 GW: 130 | 18.71 | -18lbs | 20/F]
Created: Tue Sep 20 16:09:18 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53pxz3/i_didnt_binge_even_though_i_went_over_my_calories/
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It's not exactly something to be too proud of since I went over my planned calories, but tbh I'm so proud of myself for not bingeing after I did it. Usually any time I eat over my planned calories even a tiny bit it results in a huge binge leaving me feel sick and like a total failure afterwards. I still really struggle with urges and when I feel like I ate too much even if in reality it isn't a huge amount, I feel like everything is failed and it results in a huge trigger. But now I actually have a decent amount of energy than when I really restrict and I still stayed at a deficit. Now I gotta go work out though lol. Baby steps
[Meme/Humor] fasting probs #375
/u/citrus_cunt [5' 9"| 139lbs | 19.5| +2lbs | F]
Created: Tue Sep 20 15:10:00 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53pnmn/fasting_probs_375/
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being in class and having to get up to pee every 30 minutes bc yr drinking so much goddamn water like what the fuck i feel like im in one of those overactive bladder commercials
[Rant/Rave] Coming back: elimination diet
/u/MommyTemple [5'9 | SW: 171 | CW: 155.5 | -15.5 | NB]
Created: Tue Sep 20 15:06:53 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53pn21/coming_back_elimination_diet/
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I've been away for very long...but this place always feels like home. I just feel like sharing a lot of stuff I have on my mind lately.
I visited a new endocrinologist in August and I'm glad I did cause she had a more holistic approach to my conditions. She suggested an elimination diet: no wheat, eggs, lactose and gluten for 6 weeks, then eat food with one of the above and then go back to elimination, watch for symptoms over 2 next days, then repeat with the next component. The whole process takes around 8 weeks then. I decided to go for it cause fuck, if this isn't the perfect opportunity to restrict hard, I don't know what it.
I'm on week 2 now and without counting calories meticulously, I eat about 1000-1200 cals a day. This time, I kind of try to remember that this is not exactly about losing weight, but about overall health. If it's possible to ease my eczema this way, to get rid of constant bloating, awful gas and diarrhea (TMI, sorry) then fuck yes. Pretty much all of my binge foods are gone from the picture. Since alternatives and replacements are usually more expensive, I omit them and instead eat more things that are naturally wheat/gluten/lactose free. I also decided to stop with any diet soft drinks since I'm sure they also contribute to my poor gut health. I'm also back in the gym - my fitness is pitiful, but I'm trying to not let this get me down. It helps that I'm out of uni and can visit the gym in early hours, and there's barely anyone around when I get there. I also do some extra exercise at home if I feel I need it.
I'm struggling a bit with the narrow food selection. Especially for breakfast, I have certain "demands" when it comes to this meal. I love the typical breakfast foods but they all contain the forbidden ingredients, so I'm still trying to work there. I get binge cravings still, but the difference I can see keeps me sober in a way. Besides, this time, I tell everyone, including parents and SO, that I am on a diet because of legit health reasons and they comply, which is also motivating. Usually I hide restriction from them; especially mom, who has a tendency to not listen to me at all and ignore my requests, particularily when it comes to food which makes me rage harrrd. She's finally not buying the stuff I can't eat and leaves me alone when it comes to food and it feels great.
The efforts are paying off, though. I'm bloated only if I eat plums or drink green tea, otherwise my belly is "flat". I feel lighter, brighter, like I make more sense. Today I saw my weight dropped below 75kgs, which is huge for me because that was one of my top goals. But the cravings still pop up, for now I feel like I'm able to outrun them but they might catch up, I predict they will get insufferable during week 3/4. I hope that new uni semester will provide some proper distraction so I can stick to the plan.
What made me so ill in the first place then? Right now I'm betting on lactose. If it turns out it's a combo, like lactose AND gluten, it's prolly going to be the best day of my life. No one will be able to push food onto me without looking like a total stupid asshole. Restricting and then maintaining will be much easier. Me being picky will be excused. I will be able to eat dinner, be comfortably full and have a flat stomach. On the other hand, if I do give in and binge, it will be even more like self-harm because I will be consciously doing things that cause discomfort and pain, and can have more serious consequences...
Thank you for reading and for being here, sharing the support. If anyone has some advice about elimination diet, foods and the mental frame of it all, I'd be grateful (please keep in mind I live in the middle of Europe tho lol)
[Rant/Rave] Insensitivity towards eating disorders?
/u/ForeverEmptyInside [5'9"| CW:119.6 lbs | BMI 17.7 | LW:104lbs | M]
Created: Tue Sep 20 14:42:05 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53pii6/insensitivity_towards_eating_disorders/
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It amazes me sometimes how insensitive people can be towards eating disorders, and mental illness in general.
Incoming long story ahead.
So I was in my ASL (American Sign Language) class, and the prof asked us to do something that seemed a little odd. He wrote down a bunch of words on the board and asked us to come up with "our own signs" for these words.
Now to me, this seemed like an exercise in futility for a couple reasons. The first and most obvious one being, there is no point to "making up" your own signs in sign language, because when you go to talk to someone else, they will have no idea what you are signing. So why bother filling up your mental dictionary with useless signs that wont matter anyways??
Anyways, despite how this activity made no sense what so ever, I went through with it. He then asked us to sign our favourite foods (again, these are signs that we had to make up on our own). Each student went around the room and "signed" their favourite food and the other students had to guess what their sign meant. So basically it was a big game of charades.
Despite the fact I hated talking about food, and my eating habits, things were going well until one girl in particular went to sign her word. She motioned putting something in her mouth and then reaching in her mouth with her hand to spit something out. I gathered that she must be signing a "peach" or something, and that action was supposed to be her spitting out the seed/pit.
But for one girl at the back of the class, that wasn't good enough. She thought she could make a snarky remark.
She put up her hand, and legitmately guessed "Bulimia"
Fucking Bulimia.
Of course the shock value got a couple laughs. But I mean, was it really worth it? You don't know what other people in the classroom are struggling with. Maybe one of the students in that room has had a history of eating disorders and something like that could legitimately trigger/upset them.
I understand that it was meant to be a joke, it's still so so insensitive. If the joke was made about a physical illness, such as cancer, it wouldn't have gone over so well.
I don't know why this pissed me off so much. Bulimia isn't even my own diagnosis - I have been diagnosed with anorexia nervosa.
But still, something about this just doesn't sit right in my mind.
Am I being rational?
[Discussion] A year ago my GF revealed to me that she used to be bulimic.
/u/TheGhost206
Created: Tue Sep 20 14:38:14 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53phr2/a_year_ago_my_gf_revealed_to_me_that_she_used_to/
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So I'm in a 4 year relationship with someone I care about a lot. When we met she was thin and has put on about 20 pounds a year since then. She told be she used to be bulimic about a year ago but doesn't purge anymore. However, now I think she eats too much and would like to get her diet in order but I don't say anything because of her past. How do I support her without hurting her feelings? And I how do I get her to know that a yearly 20 pound weight gain isn't sustainable and also could impact our relationship. I don't want her to look like how she did when we met, but I do want her to get her eating habits in check and just be healthy. Any suggestions?
[Discussion] ED Haiku Thread
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Sep 20 14:21:16 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53pekg/ed_haiku_thread/
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[deleted]
[Goal] I've just discovered Eugenia Cooney! Goals! 😍
/u/DenyMyHunger [5'7"| Fat! | UGW:112| F]
Created: Tue Sep 20 13:53:03 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53p9bd/ive_just_discovered_eugenia_cooney_goals/
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http://imgur.com/OkMPgZj
[Discussion] no matter how thin i get ill never be pretty....anyone else really want plastic surgery?
/u/turnonmyrighthand [4'9 | 86lb | F]
Created: Tue Sep 20 12:51:05 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53oy1f/no_matter_how_thin_i_get_ill_never_be/
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i plan to get some stuff done to my face and idgaf what anyone thinks about it, friends, family whoever. ive wanted certain procedures for nearly half my life. maybe even a boob job... ppl talk shit on plastic surgery yet our society worships celebs who amost always have had work done to get where they are.
accepting that im not beautiful puts me at peace because i can fix it rather than moping and deluding myself into thinking im happy the way i am.
please share if you dont mind if you have similar thoughts or have already gone through with it
[Tip] Dairy is the fucking devil or How I accidentally became lacotse intolerant
/u/Melusedek [173 | CW: 57.5 | GW ?? | 19.21/18.99 | F]
Created: Tue Sep 20 12:09:32 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53oqa4/dairy_is_the_fucking_devil_or_how_i_accidentally/
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I've been hard core restricting for the past month and doing really well. But today I had a small lunch then some of my friends suggested ice cream. That's fine, I can stay under 600 for the rest of the day. But after my stomach would not shut up. I got home after class and my waist is notably bloated, but before freaking out I weighed myself and I've actually lost some weight since this morning. So I have hard core evidence that the stupid ice cream bar didn't make me fatter. Just bloated. And the same thing happens when I eat cheese.
I guess this is good because neither one is actually good for me, but I didn't intend to become mildly lactose intolerant. Bittersweet...
So, just a warning, if you cut out dairy (even besides the occasional milk in your coffee like me) this could be an unforeseen consequence. PSA.
[Help] I just broke my fast
/u/eightstone [Height: 5ft 7 | CW: 9st 12lbs| BMI: 21 | Gender: F]
Created: Tue Sep 20 11:50:34 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53omnd/i_just_broke_my_fast/
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I broke my fast with 500 calories. 2 bananas, half a cup of porridge (cooked), a hard-boiled egg, and a chicken-noodle cup-a-soup. I feel kind of gross and immediately flabbier. Tempted to weigh myself but not gunna. Tomorrow I aim to fast all day. I'm going out to see a friend for lunch but she knows I'm odd about food and is accepting and happy to feed herself while I get a black coffee. I hate it when friends guilt trip you by saying they're starving and then say "well I won't eat if you're not eating!".
p.s.: I broke my fast because I was feeling weak and lethargic. I wanted to get shit done today and I was just too pathetic to do anything but lie in a ball and watch cooking shows. Now, thankfully, I feel super energised again. Ready to fast tomorrow. Any tips on how to revive myself after several days without food, without breaking a fast would be really appreciated. I did try coffee but that only helped very minimally.
[Intro] How did people treat you at different weights? I feel like I became a worse person and it doesn't matter.
/u/silversandpiper
Created: Tue Sep 20 11:29:52 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53oitd/how_did_people_treat_you_at_different_weights_i/
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I've lurked for a long time, this is my first post here and I am worried it won't be well received in other parts of reddit. I will note I have depression and anxiety which never changed during any of these weights.
Background I used to be 5'5 and 180 at my highest weight. I was that way from 15-20 and I am now 21. I am a normal weight now, and 6 months ago I was underweight. This is just what I've noticed with varying weights and I wanted to share.
180 - This was my 'normal' weight for a long time. I was used to not speaking to anyone unless I needed to. I could go entire days and never make eye contact with anyone. I felt invisible and drowning in silence. I'm not trying to sound entitled, but this will be relevant later.
138 - Normal weight. Once I hit high 130's for the first time (I lost 20 pounds in one month when I had nothing to do one summer and didn't need any mental energy from eating) I immediately noticed a difference in the way people acted towards me even though I was the same person. It was very strange having people start stopping me to talk about something.
120 - This isn't underweight for 5'5 but I was warned by my doctor that it was for me since I have large hips. I both loved and hated being this weight. People would find any random reason to talk to me and I knew the only thing that had changed for the better was my weight. I quickly learned that lots of men actually prefer underweight girls even if they say otherwise. I have NEVER been hit on by so many men. I felt like I could actually afford to be a bitch and no one would care. I hated people, but at the same time, it felt amazing and freeing.
Comments? Thoughts?
tldr; Mini rant? The thinner I get, the more people like me, even if I become a shitty person.
Edit: I'm not sure which flair I should use. I feel it could be discussion, rant or intro. I picked intro since it is my first post :p
[Help] What the HECK is up with my scale???
/u/Space-Punk [5'11" | -31lbs | 20M]
Created: Tue Sep 20 11:19:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53ogzi/what_the_heck_is_up_with_my_scale/
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I'm just super confused at the moment. I got a new scale to weigh myself on and decided to test and see if it would be the same as my old one. So I weighed myself on both and got a four-pound difference (the new one giving me a smaller number). So I decided to pick the most accurate scale, grabbed fourteen pounds worth of dumbells and both scales read exactly fourteen pounds. Why is the weight different for me but not for inanimate objects? Which scale should I use, the one that gave me a higher or lower number? It may not seem like much but having a four-pound difference is giving me anxiety, I want to know exactly what I weigh not guess which number is more accurate.
Edit: Now I'm even more confused. I decided to just use my regular scale cause it's what I know. Sitting in its regular place it reads that I've lost six pounds. However a few days ago I experimentally weighed myself on a different floor with a different result (obvi) so I decided to weigh myself there as well to make sure that it was definitely accurate. And it reads that I'm ten down! wtf?! Even though the numbers are different on that floor shouldn't it still come out to the same loss? I'm sooo mentally fucked right now ughhh.
[Thinspo] Thinspire =D
/u/eightstone [Height: 5ft 7 | CW: 9st 12lbs| BMI: 21 | Gender: F]
Created: Tue Sep 20 11:08:25 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53oeuo/thinspire_d/
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http://imgur.com/gallery/mG23x
[Tip] List your favorite low-cal foods
/u/foodfornot [5'3" | 120lbs | BMI 21.3 | -20 | GW 105 | F]
Created: Tue Sep 20 10:58:10 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53ocwn/list_your_favorite_lowcal_foods/
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**Ice Cream**
*Halo Top - any flavor: 240/pint
*Arctic Zero - toasted coconut (other flavors are gross): 150/pint
*Can of fat-free Reddi-Wip with Walden's 0 cal chocolate syrup (makes a massive bowl): 5/2T or 185/can
**Microwave Popcorn**
*Pop-Secret 100 cal pop: 100/small bag
*ShopRite organic natural popcorn: 330/big bag
**Caffeinated Drinks**
*Cold brew coffee with cinnamon: 0
*Sugar-free vanilla creamer: 30/T
*Starbucks skinny mocha: 140/Grande
*Monster energy drink: 0/sunrise or 30/lo-carb blue
*Nescafe shake (in blender: water, nescafe, ice, -blend ice-, almond milk, sugar-free chocolate syrup, creamer, splenda, sometimes pea protein -blend again-): 30/no protein or 100/protein
**Raw Fruits and Veggies**
*Pear (I eat the core too): 80/small
*Broccoli (sometimes dip in greek yogurt): 30/cup (3oz)
*Mini bell peppers (don't cut, eat them whole with seeds, add salsa): 25/3 peppers
*Trader Joe's salsa verde (mild, has vitamin C, eat with peppers): 10/2T
**Minimal Prep Real Foods**
*Spaghetti squash (cook and fork it out, add salt, sometimes tomato sauce or yogurt): 30/cup (100g)
*Miso soup (get takeout then expand in pot, add water, mushrooms, kale, chicken bouillon): 80/cup
*Boston lettuce 'tacos' with brussel sprouts, peppers, onion, salsa, yogurt: 100/several
*Omelet or scramble 2 eggs (150), 1 sliced zucchini (30), 1T parmesan (20): 200/whole thing
*Hard boiled egg (so nutrient rich): varies 60-90/egg
*Veggie Smart Dogs: 50/link
*Quaker original oatmeal (add salt and splenda, sometimes PB2): 100/packet
*PB2 (powdered PB, oils removed so less nutritious): 45/2T
**No Prep Real Foods**
*Fage greek yogurt 0% (lots of protein): 100/serving (6oz)
*Whipped cottage cheese 1% (whipped texture is yum): 90/half cup
*Nova smoked salmon (can add tomatoes or capers): 70/2 oz (3 large slices)
*Sardines (not anchovies!!! Nutrient rich, calcium and iron. Eat those bones! I like TJ's in harissa sauce or Matiz with lemon): 120/2oz or 240/whole can
[Rant/Rave] Food has too many calories.
/u/smokesanddietcokes [Doesn't actually know what she's talking about.]
Created: Tue Sep 20 10:49:01 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53ob81/food_has_too_many_calories/
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https://www.reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53ob81/food_has_too_many_calories/
[Tip] List you favorite low cal foods
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Sep 20 10:45:04 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53oahv/list_you_favorite_low_cal_foods/
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[deleted]
List your favorite low cal foods
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Sep 20 10:40:14 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53o9l6/list_your_favorite_low_cal_foods/
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[deleted]
List your favorite low-cal foods
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Sep 20 10:37:11 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53o91k/list_your_favorite_lowcal_foods/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] I hate when tabloids do this shit
/u/Noroeste [5'6 | can fit in a rowboat | F]
Created: Tue Sep 20 10:20:44 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53o5xb/i_hate_when_tabloids_do_this_shit/
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http://imgur.com/a/o59FO
[Discussion] Daily Food Diary! September 20, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Tue Sep 20 10:02:13 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53o2k5/daily_food_diary_september_20_2016/
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This is a daily food diary thread for September 20, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
[Rant/Rave] My hunger makes me feel fat.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Sep 20 09:27:22 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53nw59/my_hunger_makes_me_feel_fat/
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[deleted]
[Discussion] What does doing weights while eating on a deficit do to your body?
/u/itsybitsyelephant [5'2 | CW 118 | GW 105]
Created: Tue Sep 20 08:36:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53nndj/what_does_doing_weights_while_eating_on_a_deficit/
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You don't gain muscle, right? So you won't look any more tone?
[Discussion] ED double standards between guys and girls
/u/crapbeg
Created: Tue Sep 20 08:34:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53nn0j/ed_double_standards_between_guys_and_girls/
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So my best guy friend is a massive gymbro, like he works out all the time and has an incredible body.
The only thing is that we exhibit so many of the same behaviours (he has so much more self control than me lol) and the way that they're received by most people is vastly different.
For example, the other night, we all went to dinner at a friend's house and we all had to bring a dish. I just tried to eat all the low cal options and eat as few carbs as possible because I didn't want to cause any trouble. Every time I go out to eat with people, everyone always picks up on when I'm eating small poritons. He, on the other hand, brought raw chicken breasts (!) to cook there (to fit his protein macros, I guess). Everyone made jokes about how obsessed he is, but nobody seemed WORRIED about him.
Both of us had half a cookie and talked to each other about how bad we felt that we ate that.
It's nice for me to have someone who gets it (even if I worry about him) but it's kind of sad that girls get people enquiring constantly whereas everyone turns a blind eye to when guys do the same thing.
edit: people have been pointing out the difference between nearly dying of starvation and fitness - one is obviously healthier. I completely bypassed that point, but it makes sense. I guess I'm more concerned about the mental health aspect of it. I think it's difficult whether it's orthorexia, anorexia or anything in between
[Rant/Rave] why do i do this to myself
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Sep 20 08:19:36 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53nki9/why_do_i_do_this_to_myself/
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[deleted]
[Help] [question] do you punish yourself?
/u/thinkthinlythrowaway
Created: Tue Sep 20 08:12:22 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53njb4/question_do_you_punish_yourself/
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I mean besides from the obvious.
But if anything goes wrong with your ed or weight do you get back at yourselves?
I always wear pants that are high waisted and just normal shirts basically not allowing myself to look cute because if I have the body of a potato I might as well look like one
Do any of you do the same?
Also my mobile will flair automatically but I'm still getting messages saying I didn't flair?
[Discussion] How would your perfect day go?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Sep 20 08:04:36 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53nhy4/how_would_your_perfect_day_go/
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[deleted]
[Discussion] Are any of you in long-distance relationships?
/u/itsybitsyelephant [5'2 | CW 118 | GW 105]
Created: Tue Sep 20 07:50:37 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53nfpn/are_any_of_you_in_longdistance_relationships/
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How does it affect your relationship? Do they notice your weight loss?
[Discussion] Thinspo songs?
/u/c_marier [5'6"| 112 | 18.1 | -13 | 22F]
Created: Tue Sep 20 07:20:14 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53nb3r/thinspo_songs/
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What are some songs either that reference eating disorders or that inspire you? I'm putting together a playlist.
A few songs for me: Skin & Bones by David J. Roch, Blood in the Cut by K.Flay, My Body is a Cage by Sara Lov, Maybe by Lily Kershaw, Lying to the Mirror by Gabrielle Aplin, Anna Begins by Counting Crows. Most are not actually about eating disorders but have some lyrics here and there that struck me as relating to my experiences.
[Discussion] Do any of you eat frozen meals?
/u/itsybitsyelephant [5'2 | CW 118 | GW 105]
Created: Tue Sep 20 07:13:20 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53na4e/do_any_of_you_eat_frozen_meals/
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I've discovered that my Aldi's has awesome frozen southwestern panini's (270 calories)!
I absolutely love frozen meals because the calorie counts are already there and I do not need to worry about measuring everything. Does anyone else do this? I don't really care about feeding myself "healthy" foods really. All I want to do is lose weight. But I'm also eating the panini with ~100 calories of grape tomatoes and baby-cut carrots, so, balance? Not having to be meticulous about counting calories makes me feel normal and relaxed.
If you eat frozen meals, which are lowest-calorie?
[Discussion] Self-care and Beauty Q+A September 20, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Tue Sep 20 06:02:39 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53n02w/selfcare_and_beauty_qa_september_20_2016/
---
Eating disorders are real, complex, and devastating conditions that can have serious consequences for physical health. Use this thread to discuss harm reduction and beauty tips, plus suggestions on how to build back up the physical self before and after engaging in disordered behaviors.
Please be wary of false advice and information. Be sure to research the facts before taking anyone's advice, no matter who they are. Remember that diagnosing members is unacceptable. **Anyone looking for medical guidance should seek the opinion of a medically licensed professional.**
*****
Self-care and beauty threads are posted every Tuesday.
Have any questions or concerns? Comment below, or [PM the mods.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FproED)
[Rant/Rave] it's not enough
/u/UnrequitedOrgasms [19F | 5'6 | CW:129 | -31 | GW: 105]
Created: Tue Sep 20 05:17:03 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53muur/its_not_enough/
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I have no fucking appetite anymore and I partially use my ED to self harm, I do sugarbaby stuff so I can't do anything that leaves marks on me. I need to feel hunger pain but I just have no fucking appetite I just feel weak sometimes and it's not that I'm eating too much because I've not had more than 500kcal daily in the past fortnight.
I want to feel some kind of fucking pain but I can't I can't even cry right now I just want to kill myself my best friend did 6 months ago I just broke up with my abuser I'm fucking homeless nothing is going right for me at all I feel so sick all the time but I haven't eaten anything so can't purge but it's all I want to do I feel so fucking pathetic idk I think I'm just going to take alcohol calories on dates and fast inbetween idfc I just want to die but I'm too fucking pathetic to kill myself.
idk I know I get a lot more depressed on my period because of my BC but still this is so fucking horrible I don't want to take my antidepressants because they kill my appetite but my depression also kills my appetite idk I just feel this weird kind of I should be sad but instead I'm just numb I've not done anything I was supposed to do today and I've got an SD date tonight with him and another girl and I'm just so apathetic to it all
[Rant/Rave] [Rant/Rave] The best surprise
/u/mace__face [5'6 | CW:118 | BMI:20.66 | GW:108 | F -10lbs]
Created: Tue Sep 20 04:05:29 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53mnzt/rantrave_the_best_surprise/
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Hey lovelies, firstly please forgive the format and lack of flair- on mobile.
TD;LR at the end
I've posted before but not a lot so I just really wanted to share this update since my life has become so radically different.
I moved from the states to the Middle East about a month ago to pursue Arabic study. I've been through some really high highs and extremely low lows- most recently I've been super depressed. Just feeling extremely inadequate and alone and on top of everything I was 100% sure I gained weight since coming here. Generally Mediterranean cuisine is quite healthy/low cal but the rice and pita can be killer, not to mention the feeding culture in general so when you're someone's guest you can't exactly refuse what they offer without being rude.
I've had no access to a scale since arriving, until last night, and honestly I was terrified of what the number would say. But guys I've actually lost 4 pounds! My bmi is straddling underweight/normal at 18.5 and I've never been more excited!
I just wanted to say thank you to everyone here because when I felt most horrible I would come here and see everyone's progress and it was so inspiring. I have no idea what the coming year will bring but it feels amazing to have such a caring and encouraging community to fall back on.
I <3 you guys!!!
TL;DR: moved half way across the world, thought I gained weight- actually lost 4lbs. Y'all are amazing!
[Help] Good pants for for violin hips?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Sep 20 01:56:33 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53mcd0/good_pants_for_for_violin_hips/
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[deleted]
[Meme/Humor] This pretty much sums up my weekend.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Sep 20 01:00:22 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53m70q/this_pretty_much_sums_up_my_weekend/
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http://www.theonion.com/article/scientists-discover-eating-serves-function-other-t-38230
[Rant/Rave] Is this really a disorder?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Sep 20 00:16:42 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53m2k7/is_this_really_a_disorder/
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[deleted]
[Help] Slippery slope of replacing ED behavior with drinking
/u/59poisonandwine [5'3" | 21F | CW: 108 | GW: 96 lbs]
Created: Tue Sep 20 00:04:43 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53m1a1/slippery_slope_of_replacing_ed_behavior_with/
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I'm hoping someone can give me advice. Recently, I've been eating more. I've gained weight. (111 pounds now, fuck me). But I found that I don't care. I don't care because I get buzzed or drunk every night. I don't remember the last night that I didn't have at least one drink on. On one hand, I'm happy that I'm not obsessing over ED behavior. I start to though until I have a drink or five in me to soothe the anxiety. I really don't know what to do anymore. Anyone been here? Honestly I don't even know which is worse for me at this point. I feel like I should see a doctor but I don't know how. Do I just make an appointment for a physical and blurt out my issues? I don't even have a PCP. I need something for my anxiety or depression. I can't stop thinking about how I want to die. My ED is fueled by the fact that it is a subtle form of self harm. My drinking is fueled by the fact that it WILL kill me eventually. I don't want to go to the doctor because I'm not SKINNY enough. I have too much empathy for every fucking one and I get so depressed seeing so many people suffering in the hospital where I work who don't deserve to be suffering. I used to be light enough to be diagnosed with anorexia but now I feel like I'm not *good* enough. I don't always restrict. I even eat normally often. Sometimes I purge for no good reason because I proceed to binge again later on alcohol and fast food and don't purge. Sometimes I fast for a day. Like wtf am I even doing? My husband is deployed so he isn't here to judge my behavior. I'm living with a friend right now but I hide booze in my room. I just feel like I need SOMETHING my life feels so dull I need the high of fasting or being drunk.
[Goal] Today, I'm not going to binge and purge
/u/Mi__ra [165cm |50 kg | 18.6 | 0 | F]
Created: Mon Sep 19 22:57:25 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53ltjx/today_im_not_going_to_binge_and_purge/
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I want to say this here so that I have one more reason not to b/p. It would be embarrassing to come here once again and tell you I failed -once again.
Yesterday I thought about reasons to quit binging and purging.
Some of the things I came up with:
-money. I spend a LOT on food I b/p. It amounts to several hundreds of euros per month.
-weight/looks. I'm actually about 50 kg right now, I haven't updated my flair. If I quit b/p, I'd probably lose some weight or at least I wouldn't be so bloated.
-addiction. I hate how it rules my life. I plan my whole life around binging and purging. I spend so much time and energy on it.
-health. Now most of my calories comes from binge food I don't manage to throw up. That's mostly empty calories. If I ate real food for the same calorie amount, I'd feel so much better and probably could exercise more.
If you have any hints or some motivation, I would appreciate it a lot. I made a plan for today and I'll do my best to stick to it.
[Other] I wrote a poem about my binging problem
/u/lightfeathers [5'4" | CW 114 | GW 95 | F]
Created: Mon Sep 19 22:32:17 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53lqmo/i_wrote_a_poem_about_my_binging_problem/
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It's hard to see beauty,
When you don't see it in yourself
When all you see are imperfections
And your broken self
You see every crack
And you see every flaw
You can't do anything to fix it
You stare at yourself with a clenched jaw
You lie down in the dark,
Your cheeks wet from tears
Your eyes void of spark
The sound of your sobs filling your ears
It's hard to see beauty,
When your vision is blurred
Your lover is off duty
You're on your own, no one's heard
"Don't pity yourself", they say
"Don't make promises you shouldn't make
You're setting yourself up for failure
Stop hurting yourself, for your own sake"
But there's nothing you can do
When an addict needs her fix
She shakily reaches for that one last bite,
It should do the trick
You know it's not the last,
And you know it's not over
You get the impulse to just break your mirror
You're tired of what you see
And you can't handle the stares,
So you isolate yourself
Hoping no one cares
I wrote a poem about my binging problem
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Sep 19 22:26:23 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53lpv3/i_wrote_a_poem_about_my_binging_problem/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] I had a very bad day yesterday and just want to talk it out.
/u/aerienne [5'5" | 138 | 23.2 | -32 | F]
Created: Mon Sep 19 22:23:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53lpjj/i_had_a_very_bad_day_yesterday_and_just_want_to/
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For a while, I recorded my measurements each month in MFP. It was fun when I was dropping weight. Then I stopped and just took them again yesterday. Since March, I've gained .5" - 1" everywhere. EVERYWHERE. It means all of my clothes still fit, but I just feel like a blimp in them. It just feels like I'm constantly bloated and my clothes have that 'just out of the dryer' tightness.
I treated myself to a concert performance on Sunday. I got ready and was so happy to take the time for myself. However, the whole time I sat listening to the music, I was so uncomfortable. All I could think about was getting out of my clothes and going home.
So after taking my measurements yesterday, I lost it. My anxiety was through the roof so I went for a walk and ended up in a Monoprix (it's like Target). I bought binge food and went home and gorged right before I had to work. So I was even more bloated and made sure to buy foods I couldn't purge because I thought I deserved the pain for being so stupid. It doesn't make sense typing it out, but those were my thoughts.
I ate all this food at 5pm. I tossed and turned all last night because I couldn't sleep from the pain of my stomach. TMI, but I kept getting up and vomited a bit just from the sheer amount of food. Years of bulimia messed up my system and food just stays a bit longer before being digested, so if I flex my stomach food comes up.
To make it worse, I fucked up on a Monday. It made me feel like my whole week was already ruined, but I know better (in theory). I just woke up for the day and feel like shit.
I have to buy a scale. I have to. I need to find one this week because it's the only way to keep me on track. Not having one led me here and it's horrible. I can't go by how my clothes fit or measurements because that's not consistent.
I just hate this anxiety. It's ridiculous and makes no sense. Why can't I have self-control like I used to? Why can't I restrict like that? How does binging due to anxiety make anything better? It doesn't. I don't understand why my brain is working against me. I didn't binge after a week of restricting or anything. My body wasn't seeking nourishment; it just was stupid.
Thank you for letting my rant. I have no one else to talk to about this and it's maddening.
[Rant/Rave] I feel doomed.
/u/ilovepugs_ [5'6 1/2" | 149.2 | 23.7 | -4.8 | F]
Created: Mon Sep 19 21:51:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53llhu/i_feel_doomed/
---
So ever since the Body Toning class incident, I've spiraled out of control. I've been purging close to every day and/or restricting. My friends are pretty worried about me and they sat me down and gave me an intervention. I mean, as ridiculous as it sounds I don't think I'm that bad. But because I'm so focus on my weight and my disordered eating habits, I can't concentrate at all anymore on anything. I'm hurting my loved ones. I feel so guilty that I'm putting this first. I have my values all out of wack. I'm putting being thin and having perfect control above my wellbeing, education, and my loved ones. I feel so guilty. But then I feel so guilty that I'm not at my UGW because I've been counting calories and binging and purging and all, but I have absolutely nothing to show. I feel ashamed. I feel gross. Lately, I've been feeling doomed. I feel like at the rate I'm going, I'm not gonna make it. I feel like I'm going to die. I don't know what to do. I don't feel suicidal. I want to live. But I don't know if I can stop. Not until I can prove that I'm in control and that I can drop this disgusting weight. But I know that if I keep going, I might fail my classes.
I'm fucked.
P.S. I can't flair because I'm on mobile.
[Help] Fasting or restricting?
/u/ozh_esta [5'3.5" | CW 116 | GW 102 | 20.70 | -34lbs | NB]
Created: Mon Sep 19 21:35:22 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53lj8h/fasting_or_restricting/
---
My roommate is taking an unexpected trip tomorrow, and won't be home until around 8pm on Wednesday. Generally I only eat when I'm around my roommate, because she gets weird if I don't.
I've never fasted before so I'm not 100% sure how to do it and not faint - I'm going to the gym tomorrow and then I have pilates+yoga on Wednesday. But I really really want to lose these last 3 pounds I have before my first major GW and I feel like this is the perfect time.
For reference, I generally restrict to 300-700 (I haven't had above 1000 in weeks lmao), but could definitely go lower especially because my roommate won't be here. I just want to plan for success and I'm scared that if I fast, it'll slowly turn into a fast/binge cycle.
[Help] working out while fasting
/u/jrste310 [5 ft | 106 lb | 21.34 | -21.5| Female]
Created: Mon Sep 19 21:26:29 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53lhy0/working_out_while_fasting/
---
[removed]
[Other] i just broke up with my gf
/u/hayleystark [5'4"|NB]
Created: Mon Sep 19 21:10:34 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53lft1/i_just_broke_up_with_my_gf/
---
it wasn't working for me. i felt like a burden & like she was never proud of how far i have come or never understood how much i have overcome. it was other things too but i still feel bad. i didn't want her to cry. i didn't know she didn't see it coming.
[Rant/Rave] Infection won't heal & I think it's because of my diet + stress
/u/skinnysickthrowaway
Created: Mon Sep 19 20:55:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53ldo0/infection_wont_heal_i_think_its_because_of_my/
---
Throwaway bc I'm embarrassed.
Got some HPV warts as of July. Bf didn't realize he had them since he never had warts. I paid $600 in treatment so far. Chemical. Nothing. They are bigger & there's more. Can I get a refund? No?
Looking into it every place keeps saying to have good nutrition & no stress. I have **tons** of stress right now & shit diet most "nutrition" being vodka. That's not going to change any time soon.
I feel defeated & disgusted with myself.
[Rant/Rave] [Rant/Rave] Some days, I'm not even sure I have an eating disorder.
/u/idkjust [5'9" | 130.6lbs | 19.29 | -15 | F]
Created: Mon Sep 19 20:11:50 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53l71w/rantrave_some_days_im_not_even_sure_i_have_an/
---
Everybody hates the way their body looks and everybody restricts their eating sometime- literally every girl in America. What makes me different? I'm not even underweight anymore. I can never have enough control to look significantly thinner.
I used to throw up and exercise like crazy, now I do neither. I'd like to again, but for now I feel like a little bitch for talking about my "ED" that in reality is nonexistent.
[Discussion] Pre-disorder, did/could you imagine yourself ending up sick?
/u/Astroyeti
Created: Mon Sep 19 19:49:24 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53l3n9/predisorder_didcould_you_imagine_yourself_ending/
---
Personally I can say the answer is no. In hindsight I'm not surprised. I can't say I'd ever imagined I'd end up with an eating disorder, let alone OCD.
[Meme/Humor] this is probably TMI but I can't stop laughing
/u/TinyTinyCleverCDR [156 cm | 52.5 kg | 22.45 | -6 kg | F]
Created: Mon Sep 19 19:42:30 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53l2kg/this_is_probably_tmi_but_i_cant_stop_laughing/
---
So I took a laxative this morning with my adderall. Everything was fine. I went to the bathroom, then got up and left for a run.
About 3 miles in I felt like I kinda had to go again. No big deal. I figured I'd just jog back to my place. After about a block, it became apparent that this would be impossible.
Now, I usually jog along a boardwalk by the river. It's very pretty, and there's all kinds of stores. There're always people jogging. Well, there was only one store alive at 6 AM, and the dude in there was clearly not being paid enough to care about my bullshit. I begged him to let me use the bathroom until it was clear that there was something angry inside of me that was going to fight its way out whether I was wearing pants or not.
I had to poop by the river. Keeping a careful eye on the other joggers, I climbed down the rocks and found a secluded part of the shoreline, with bushes separating the sand from the boardwalk. When I was sure absolutely no one up top could see me, I dug a hole, squatted down, buried it, and then dunked my butt in the river to clean up. Everything seemed clear... until I looked up and saw a HUGEASS FERRY directly behind me in the water.
I was so focused on making sure nobody could see me from the boardwalk that I completely missed the GIANT BOAT right off the shore. Seriously, I could've swam to it. It was full of people and they all watched me poop.
I don't think I'm gonna jog there for a while.
[Rant/Rave] The highs and lows
/u/fckk [5'4| CW 120lbs | 20.60 | GW 115 | F]
Created: Mon Sep 19 19:26:17 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53l03k/the_highs_and_lows/
---
Some days I like my eating disorder. It causes clarity, focus, success, feelings of superiority and control, excitement and hope. It makes me feel cute, successful, professional, sexy, mysterious, sought after, intelligent, etc.
Other days (today) it makes me feel like I literally want to die. I'm so sick of the highs and lows, the false promises, the false starts, the ACID REFLUX, THE HEARTBURN, THE GENERAL DISCOMFORT. I feel so low today that I can't focus on tasks at all, I'm letting all productivity fall by the wayside.
I'm sick of the wishy-washy, sick of the manic highs and the suicidal, dark horrible lows.
Tomorrow is a "new day". But I know it won't be "normal". It'll just hopefully be a high, not a low.
Ugh, I want to die.
*Disclaimer: my usual disclaimer on posts like these is: I'm not actually going to kill myself and I never could. I have a nephew who needs me and an ill parent who needs me, I'd never ever ever do that to them. I'm being blunt about very strong feelings in this post, hence the language. But don't waste your time counseling me about suicidal intent, it's just ideation. Thank you.
Today my grandma said the strangest thing.
/u/dec4y [5'3|cw:148|25.4|-16lbs|F]
Created: Mon Sep 19 18:34:35 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53ks32/today_my_grandma_said_the_strangest_thing/
---
She and I were in the car on the way home and she asked me if I had plans for Friday night. I asked why and she said she wanted to bake a pie and have my brother over to hang out. Then she said "If you're even eating these days." And I asked what she meant and she said "Well are you eating anything?" And I told her yes, and she noted that I'd lost weight since I'd last seen her and that she never saw me eat.
I just thought it was strange that she of all people said that, because my parents haven't noticed anything plus I've been in an awful binge cycle the past few weeks. It made me feel good in kind of a sick way, hearing her say that. I just thought it was weird that she pointed it out.
Sorry this was kinda pointless. Also I'm on mobile sorry I can't flair:(
[Rant/Rave] i'm just hurt
/u/rosyskies [5'2" | CW: 112 | GW: 95 | 21.22 | -15 | F]
Created: Mon Sep 19 18:00:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53kmrr/im_just_hurt/
---
hi everyone, it's been awhile since i've posted. i don't even know if i can post this sort of thing here but i really just need to vent and i feel like this is a safe place to do that.
anyway, i just recently got back from a study abroad and moved into my new apartment with my roommate. we've had a pretty good relationship up until we moved in together. basically we've had a lot of arguments and it hasn't been good for either of us. i thought we had moved on after a long conversation but apparently not...
last night we were trying to get our internet up and running. i wasn't feeling particularly good about my appearance yesterday because of how much weight i gained during the study abroad. so i wasn't dressed very nicely (think cozy clothes that are hardly flattering). she decided to post a snapchat onto her story of me without makeup, in my unflattering clothes, and looking morbidly overweight. i literally looked like a whale in a sweater in the snap. i asked if she would remove it (she knows i have body confidence issues but she's not aware of my eating disorder or how deep my self-esteem issues run). she flat out refused me. she said, "it's my story i can post what i want."
i didn't know what to do so i went to bed early and cried. i've felt pretty good about myself lately and this has completely smashed whatever positivity i had for my body into pieces. i've never felt so ugly and out of control in regards to my appearance.
i'm still really upset about it and she hasn't removed the snapchat from her story. i just don't know why someone would do something like that. anyway, sorry if this kind of post isn't allowed. i can't contact my best friend (the only person who would understand) very easily and i needed to get this off my chest. i just feel so disgusting because that snapchat of my huge body is burned into my brain and i just wonder how many people have seen it so far. it also really hurts that someone i considered a close friend would do something so awful to me.
tldr; roommate posted a unflattering snapchat on her story of me, won't remove it, and now i hate my body again.
*edit*: hi everyone! i wanted to thank you all you for your kind words and support. it really means a lot to me especially because i don't easily have people available to vent to but i for sure feel supported and welcome in this community :-) <3
Why do short and taller women have the same GWs in mainstream society?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Sep 19 16:18:22 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53k61q/why_do_short_and_taller_women_have_the_same_gws/
---
[deleted]
[Help] I'm stuck and hungry
/u/c_marier [5'6"| 112 | 18.1 | -13 | 22F]
Created: Mon Sep 19 16:01:00 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53k330/im_stuck_and_hungry/
---
My weight has been stuck at 112/113 for weeks now, so I stopped eating breakfast and lunch, just drinking black coffee and hot water until dinner, which is usually between 500-700 calories (a TON, I know, but better than before at least) BUT I HAVE SOMEHOW GAINED THREE POUNDS
And now I'm 115.
And I had my period last week - reminder that I still have it and I'm such a failure - but it ended today so it's not bloat and I don't get it and WHY THE FUCK AM I GAINING WEIGHT? I'm so hungry. I haven't eaten breakfast or lunch in two weeks and it's not making a fucking difference.
Help?
[Discussion] Anyone happy with small boobs? [discussion]
/u/cry_baaby
Created: Mon Sep 19 15:55:18 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53k24w/anyone_happy_with_small_boobs_discussion/
---
I know this might be TMI, but I got hella small tits.
When I was little (like 9), I was so jealous of my friends boobs which were always bigger than mine. I'm about done with puberty now (I'm 17), and I still have small boobs, but now I'm happy with them 💕
If you are blessed in the chest, more power to you! I'm just curious what you all think, and if you think your ED has affected your preference ~
[Thinspo] The ultimate anti-thinspo [NSFL]
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Sep 19 15:00:39 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53jsg1/the_ultimate_antithinspo_nsfl/
---
http://m.imgur.com/a/hQQFF?
[Thinspo] thinspo in honour of another fasting day and 5lb lost.
/u/eightstone [Height: 5ft 7 | CW: 9st 12lbs| BMI: 21 | Gender: F]
Created: Mon Sep 19 13:35:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53jcxe/thinspo_in_honour_of_another_fasting_day_and_5lb/
---
http://imgur.com/gallery/uAPOJ
[Discussion] Do you think the women whose bodies you most admire also have eating disorders? Or are they just lucky?
/u/losgatosmeansthecats
Created: Mon Sep 19 13:12:16 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53j8jp/do_you_think_the_women_whose_bodies_you_most/
---
Posting this from my alt account but I promise I'm not trolling. The Cara Delevingne thread got me wondering: of all the thin women you admire (not necessarily just celebrities), what percentage of them do you think simply won the genetic lottery? Personally I'm leaning towards close to 100%.
[Rant/Rave] 5lbs down from a four day fast, yay!
/u/eightstone [Height: 5ft 7 | CW: 9st 12lbs| BMI: 21 | Gender: F]
Created: Mon Sep 19 12:42:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53j303/5lbs_down_from_a_four_day_fast_yay/
---
I know it's water weight and whatnot but huzzah! one more day of fasting I think. It's not started to feel properly tough yet, obviously have oodles of fat supplies. Tomorrow I have the day off work which will make it harder. Operation Distract Self.
[Help] This is a long shot but, I feel like you'd all know of anyone
/u/canwefloat [5'5 | 112 | - 19 lbs | F]
Created: Mon Sep 19 12:32:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53j153/this_is_a_long_shot_but_i_feel_like_youd_all_know/
---
Does anyone know how many oz the medium soup cups at Safeway have?
I'm currently trying to recover but I also feel like I need to measure everything I eat to maintain my control problem. Thanks, I'm kind of freaking out because I was just going to check after I ate it, but it wasn't on the cup or online.
[Rant/Rave] I'm a wreck
/u/mindgamesbodygames [5'4'' | going down]
Created: Mon Sep 19 11:55:41 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53iudm/im_a_wreck/
---
Haven't posted in a while, things have gone down hill so fast. I've dropped 14 pounds since the middle of august, my calories are pretty much only coming from alcohol and fruit and I'm purging almost every day.
I'm in so much deeper than I ever thought I'd be again but I don't care. This weekend I did a really terrible thing. I feel like the scum of the earth and I am at risk of losing an entire group of friends over this. But part of me is okay with it, because this secret is eating me alive and it's a good excuse to let me destroy myself. I don't want to be thought of as beautiful. I want my body to make people look away and not find it attractive so I never again get into the situation that I got into this weekend.
I never thought I'd find myself back here. And it feels different than the last time - easier, almost. I'm not obsessing or counting calories I'm just not eating. But in another way it feels the exact same. I'm just wrapping myself up in nothingness and hoping that being empty will solve everything. I don't even really know why I'm posting this, just to vent I guess. Welcome to hell, kids.
[Rant/Rave] STOP FUCKING LYING
/u/High_as_red [5'4 | F]
Created: Mon Sep 19 11:03:42 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53ikph/stop_fucking_lying/
---
When I see a celeb that REALLY motivates me I google them to see if she dropped anything about her lifestyle. And then a website goes. DO YOU WANT A BODY LIKE EMILY RATAJKOWSKI? "Well.. yes" WELL GREAT YOU CAN. SHE DOESN'T WORK OUT! SHE EATS A LOT OF STEAK AND DOUGHNUTS AND LOVES CAKE. No she fucking doesn't do some goddamn science.
[Discussion] Daily Food Diary! September 19, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Mon Sep 19 10:03:04 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53i9r6/daily_food_diary_september_19_2016/
---
This is a daily food diary thread for September 19, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
[Other] This gif oh my god, sorry jut had to share..
/u/taeyeons-comrade [perpetual shame]
Created: Mon Sep 19 09:41:53 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53i5xz/this_gif_oh_my_god_sorry_jut_had_to_share/
---
https://media.giphy.com/media/Eix3RKzEM7OUw/giphy.gif
[Goal] Broke through 50kg!
/u/3drinkkaraokestar [175cm | SW: 57kg CW:52.2kg GW: 48kg | F]
Created: Mon Sep 19 09:29:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53i3nl/broke_through_50kg/
---
Couldn't believe it when I saw it: 49.6kg!! Never thought I'd see the day.
Just wanted to share :)
[Rant/Rave] [rant] I'm the heaviest I've been in 2 years
/u/thinkthinlythrowaway
Created: Mon Sep 19 09:20:06 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53i1u3/rant_im_the_heaviest_ive_been_in_2_years/
---
The trying to be normal has finally caught up to me. I promised myself to never hit 140 again and here I am at 139.4.
I feel like I can't breath. I want to self harm like I did before but I know I can't.
I stooped so low to try to purge last night but I've never been able to and my throat is just raw now.
I feel like an utter failure. I hate all my friends who encouraged me to be healthy, I hate my boyfriend for loving me. I hate myself.
Everything sucks.
[Goal] I beat my period cravings!!! And got the best reward
/u/raspberryfleur [5'4 | 139 | 23.9 | -21 | Female]
Created: Mon Sep 19 09:20:01 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53i1tl/i_beat_my_period_cravings_and_got_the_best_reward/
---
[removed]
[Help] Body temperature and TDEE?
/u/skinnieme [66" | 132lbs | 21.39| F]
Created: Mon Sep 19 08:52:23 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53hwry/body_temperature_and_tdee/
---
So my body temperature is consistently low, like in the 95-96 degrees kind of range. How does this effect my TDEE? I know that a large number of calories go towards maintaining body temperature, and I'm wondering what kind of calorie adjustment from my height/weight/age TDEE calculation 3 degrees would make.
[Rant/Rave] Fasting and bodily functions (semi-gross/funny story)
/u/88Wolves [5'6.5" | 100.2 | 15.93 | GW 90 | F]
Created: Mon Sep 19 08:47:56 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53hw2l/fasting_and_bodily_functions_semigrossfunny_story/
---
So, I tend to get extremely nauseated around Day 4-5 of a fast. It always passes, but until it does, it's a nuisance. I know that eating even something small generally makes it go away immediately, but that's not an option (I *need* to hit 100 lbs. or lower by Friday), so I've just gotta deal for now...
Anywho, I'm on Day 4 of a fast today. I had black coffee this morning (when I'm fasting, I permit myself water, black coffee/tea, Coke Zero, caffeine pills and Bronkaid), and I was feeling okay. Then I got the hiccups...
Now, I'm one of those people who **absolutely cannot stand** hiccups. Like, if they last longer than five minutes, I will end up having to fight off a full-blown panic attack. So, I was already INSANELY frustrated, when suddenly I got hit with a wave of nausea. Talk about adding insult to injury.
I was walking to the water fountain in the hall outside my office, hoping that cold water would quell both the hiccups and nausea, when I sneezed. And for some reason, the combination of hiccuping, nausea, and sneezing all at once must've been really confusing for my body. Because I proceeded to projectile sneeze-vomit coffee out my nose, all over the hallway. My brain couldn't even process what happened at first. And when I did, I just had to laugh.
Good news though- I'm no longer hiccuping nor nauseated!!
[Thinspo] the queen herself, cara delevingne
/u/tinybites [5'6" | sw: 185 | cw: 159.5 | gw: 115]
Created: Mon Sep 19 08:27:41 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53hslg/the_queen_herself_cara_delevingne/
---
http://imgur.com/a/vgb3K
[Help] Steamed vs. Raw
/u/WeighingDown [5'2" | 108 | 20.46 | F]
Created: Mon Sep 19 07:46:31 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53hly3/steamed_vs_raw/
---
On mobile with no access to a computer so I'm sorry about my lack of flair.
I love vegetables...but only to an extent. I've been eating so many raw vegtables these last few weeks and truthfully, I'm sick of them. I know that, for the most part, raw vegtables are great for you and lower in calories than when they are steamed....but how much lower? How do you go about adding steamed vegetables to MFP? Do you take the weight of the vegetables raw or steamed? Do you search and select one of the raw options or the steamed options? I'm so confused as to how to go about this to get the most accurate number.
Thanks in advanced for the help!
[Rant/Rave] Mini-binged, need support
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Sep 19 07:30:24 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53hjln/minibinged_need_support/
---
[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] Today I love being sick
/u/notyourtoy [5'8" | 127 lbs | 19.1 BMI | -36 lbs | F]
Created: Mon Sep 19 06:44:17 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53hcz3/today_i_love_being_sick/
---
Last weekend was my birthday (27, woo!) and I binged the hell out of it. Enjoyed every second, kept my binge semi-reasonable, and expected to be up a few pounds this morning.
Well I did not expect to completely lose my jawline.
Looked in the mirror and my face is puffy, round, and my jaw is gone. It was devastating to see, I almost cried.
So I get to work, in a total state of mourning. I usually am angry when I lose ground like this but today I was just so sad. I am now an hour in my workday and I feel feverish, I have a sinus headache, and the most painful cough. Suddenly, it dawned on me, my throat is swollen! Because I'm sick! Not because I'm fat!
Of course 3 lbs of water weight doesn't hide a whole jawline, but we all know how irrational ED makes us. Never been so glad I probably have strep, it saved my sanity.
[Discussion] Weekly Stats Update! September 19, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Mon Sep 19 06:03:36 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53h7cd/weekly_stats_update_september_19_2016/
---
This is the weekly status thread for September 19, 2016.
The weekly status thread is to help motivate our users, and to eventually see how far they've come! Be it for weight loss, weight gain, or maintaining- everyone is welcome. Previous updates are archived [here.](http://www.reddit.com/r/proED/wiki/archives)
Please include the following information (with all necessary units of measurement):
* Height:
* Current weight (CW):
* Highest weight (HW):
* Lowest weight (LW):
* Goal weight (GW):
* Ultimate goal weight (UGW):
* Weight lost (WL):
* BMI: ([Use this to calculate your BMI](https://people.maths.ox.ac.uk/trefethen/bmi_calc.html))
* Age:
* Gender expression:
Here's a handy-dandy copy/paste of the above format:
* Height:
* CW:
* HW:
* LW:
* GW:
* UGW:
* WL:
* BMI:
* Age:
* Gender expression:
*****
Status threads are posted every Monday.
Have any questions or concerns? Comment below, or [PM the mods.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FproED)
[Rant/Rave] Starting Over
/u/faebun [5'6.5 | 113.6lb | 18.06 | -50.4lb | NB]
Created: Mon Sep 19 05:47:42 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53h5bi/starting_over/
---
Copy/pasting this from a weekly accountability thread on another ED sub.
"I don't know if I can keep doing what I'm doing right now. It's not sustainable. I'm kind of in recovery, but... I don't know. I don't think I can do it. I feel my eating disorder sneaking up on me again and to be honest it's kind of comforting.
I'm going to go for a jog at least twice this week. I need to find a route that I'm comfortable with, maybe one that goes by some Pokestops. Each run will be 5km.
I'm going to have a large breakfast, a small lunch, and a tiny dinner. Three meals a day, no snacking. Under 1000 cals for the day. People keep making jokes about me eating so much on my camshow and staying slim, so I must be throwing it up afterwards... I'm not, but now I feel like a pig and I want to. No more food on cam. The longer I cam, the better, too. I'll make more money and have a longer period of time when I'm not 'allowed' to eat.
I'd like to immerse myself so much in my work that I skip meals without even realizing it, but I think I'm too hyperaware of food. Either way, more focus on work and photosets. I need the passive income so I can stop working myself to death- or at least, if I do work myself to death, it'll be more profitable.
Drink 64 oz of water a day. Coffee does not count. Mio can be added to every other bottle of water for electrolytes and flavor.
Also, tomorrow I need to pick up my meds, someone please kick my ass if I don't get around to it. I've been off of my antidepressant for 20 days."
I miss all of you. I feel lost and stupid and unsure of what to do with myself. I'm a camgirl now, so that's exciting, but on days off it's like ok, I can't cam OR focus on my ED because I'm sort of in half-assed recovery, so what do I do with myself? I don't know who I am without an eating disorder.
I don't know what I like to do for fun. Before I just did things because they ate up time while I was fasting- is that fun? Is that what normal people enjoy? I do X thing for Y amount of minutes, because for Y amount of minutes I'm not eating. It doesn't matter if X is something that I like or not. That's just never been a factor, and now it is, and it's confusing and I don't like it.
Objectively life is going great but I still low key kind of want to die. I guess I'm just a selfish bitch.
[Help] Why am I getting a thigh gap?
/u/commtra [5'7 | GW:110 | -17,5 | F]
Created: Mon Sep 19 03:48:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53gtaf/why_am_i_getting_a_thigh_gap/
---
Been fairly low weights before and never had a prominent thigh gap. I had small thighs but there was never a gap when I stood with my feet together or anything.
Now however, I'm still like 30 pounds heavier and getting a thigh gap. My bone structure can't change? Is it because this time my weight loss has to do with exercise? So many questions..
[Goal] A week binge-free!!!!!!
/u/dnedna [5'7" | 116 | 18.15 | GW:110 | F]
Created: Mon Sep 19 03:03:00 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53gpas/a_week_bingefree/
---
Today will be my eighth day binge-free. I haven't gone this long without it in about two years!! I feel so in control, even though I've been making myself eat higher calories (1000ish) in order to try and stop binging, which is kind of difficult. Sorry for the post, I'm just super freaking happy about it :)))
[Goal] Finally broke 120!!!!
/u/slytherinsedona [5'5 | 115.0 | 19.1 | -25.0 | F]
Created: Mon Sep 19 02:47:33 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53gnzu/finally_broke_120/
---
Since college has started, I haven't had access to a scale until yesterday, when I finally got my ass over to target to buy one. I've been really good about what I've been eating, how much I've been eating, etc. lately, so I was hoping for maybe 121 at best. I STEPPED ON THE FUCKING SCALE AND IT SAID 118.4. I literally weighed myself at least ten times, ripped out the batteries and reset the scale. Every time it was the same. I tried it out wearing my heavy boots to make sure it wasn't malfunctioning, and it isn't.
I fucking did it.
[Goal] [Goal] I made it through my first 24 hour fast.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Sep 19 02:45:45 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53gnut/goal_i_made_it_through_my_first_24_hour_fast/
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[deleted]
[Goal] Finally documenting my losses! Thought it was time to visualize the end goal, and I was especially inspired by a quote I saw on here earlier!
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Sep 18 23:21:06 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53g4sm/finally_documenting_my_losses_thought_it_was_time/
---
https://imgur.com/a/2hoxX
[Tip] Coolest food scale I've seen!
/u/InSkyLimitEra [5' 7.25" | HW 180 | CW 113 | LW 113 | 29 F]
Created: Sun Sep 18 23:02:13 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53g2s3/coolest_food_scale_ive_seen/
---
So, last night, my partner and I started the process of putting together the beginning of a wedding registry. Our registry is on Amazon, at least tentatively.
Look at this glorious food scale: https://www.amazon.com/Nourish-Portions-Nutritional-Greater-Goods/dp/B00O5U4NDQ/ref=sr_1_2?ie=UTF8&qid=1474261035&sr=8-2&keywords=Food+scale+macros
It has a database of 2000 foods, you punch in the code associated with it, and it gives you both the weight and all the nutrition facts on a little "nutrition facts" standard label (but based on the weight of the food).
I concede that apps that allow you to enter foods in grams or ounces make that functionality redundant, but I still just think this is super-cool and brilliant. Totally added to the tentative registry. Figured I'd share. :)
(No affiliations to disclose. Just thought it was neat!)
[Rant/Rave] I love the feeling of losing control
/u/Para-Medic [5'1' | too much | too much |0 | F]
Created: Sun Sep 18 22:16:11 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53fxil/i_love_the_feeling_of_losing_control/
---
I've been drinking all evening. I'm not drunk, but I know I fucked up calorie wise. It's almost midnight here and I have to be up for work in about 5 hours. I don't care. I'm going to pop some pills and feel miserable all day, but I will look back on this when I am feeling "normal" and completely romanticize my fucked up life. When I'm normal, I'm no one. When I am fasting and purging and drinking and doing drugs, I'm special. I'm someone. I don't even know if I should be ashamed of it. It scares me how much I relish being a mess.
Edit:I'm drinking powerade zero. I'm not a total fuck up...
[Help] I live next door to a gas station.. Help!
/u/britneyisatrashyslut [5'9" | 155 | -3 lbs | GW 130 | F]
Created: Sun Sep 18 21:46:19 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53ftmm/i_live_next_door_to_a_gas_station_help/
---
So, I live next door to a gas station (not *exactly* next door, but it's on the same block), so it's super easy to just take a quick trip for a snack or slushy or drink...
It's too easy to just forget my fast and binge on shitty snack foods, and it just feels like I can't stop myself!!!
Does anyone have any advice on how I can access the rational, thin-loving part of my brain that's trying to stop me when I think about just strolling next door to the shit-food store? :/
[Thinspo] Taylor Momsen thinspo 💕
/u/cry_baaby
Created: Sun Sep 18 21:45:42 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53ftk8/taylor_momsen_thinspo/
---
https://imgur.com/a/wN5Qk
[Intro] Do you do intros here? I'm doing an intro!
/u/onlyroom_forthin [5'6 | CW:151.4.0 | 24.57 | SW:165 | UGW:120 | F]
Created: Sun Sep 18 21:40:30 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53fsu2/do_you_do_intros_here_im_doing_an_intro/
---
Hi! I almost posted this under my regular name and realize there's a ton of identifying info there, so I decided to switch to a throwaway. There's a tiny chance that someone may recognize me, I used to have a pretty popular Xanga and then Tumblr under this name. If you happened to have been active from 2008-2013 on either site then maybe you know me!
I've never thought I really have an eating disorder, just a sort of disordered relationship with food. I tend to restrict and then eventually binge, but my weight has never been unhealthily low. I was at one point ~125, which was great, but I've since ballooned up. I've bounced around from 145-160, but when I hit 165 a couple weeks ago I realized it was really a problem. I started watching my intake again about two weeks ago and have lost about 8 lbs so I'm hoping I can stay on the right track!
Anyway, I don't expect this to get much attention, but I just wanted to say hi! Probably influenced by the fact that I saved most of my calories today for wine and I'm half a bottle in :)
[Rant/Rave] I was left alone in the pharmacy at Wegmans
/u/explodingrhinoceros [5'7" | CW: 166.0 | BMI: 25.9 | SW: 220.0 lbs | GW: 125.0 lbs | F]
Created: Sun Sep 18 21:25:59 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53fqvk/i_was_left_alone_in_the_pharmacy_at_wegmans/
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Shit man. I was grocery shopping with my friend this morning, and we came to the little pharmacy area and he said he forgot something and had to go back and grab it. He then told me to go ahead and get in line to check out. Instead of listening to him, my attention gravitated towards this health machine thing that could take your weight. So naturally I stepped on it. Crap. Then I started panicking. Then I went over to the laxatives and really thought about sneaking some into the cart. Thankfully my friend called me to ask where I was, but I still didn't snap out of it.
I was doing pretty well for a little stretch there.
[Help] Maintaining at 380 calories?
/u/concuidado [4'11 | 83 lbs | 17.8 | -62| F]
Created: Sun Sep 18 21:23:43 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53fqlm/maintaining_at_380_calories/
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I have been slowly upping my average calories by 5-10 calories a week but for the past 2-3 weeks I have not lost any weight but have been eating at 365-380 average per day. Has anyone had issues like this? I don't want to have to stay in this range to maintain.
[Other] Do any of you guys have a twitter account? What do you think of the community?
/u/toastyhigh [5'3.5 | 108.5| F]
Created: Sun Sep 18 20:42:52 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53fkv3/do_any_of_you_guys_have_a_twitter_account_what_do/
---
https://www.reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53fkv3/do_any_of_you_guys_have_a_twitter_account_what_do/
[Discussion] What made you talk about it?
/u/kickkkasss [5'5 | CW:134 | GW:110 | F]
Created: Sun Sep 18 20:41:43 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53fkpe/what_made_you_talk_about_it/
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Okay so I started seeing a counselor recently and I've been toying with the idea of talking to him about my food issues for some reason. I don't want help and I don't want to change, so I don't know why I'm thinking about it, but I am. I've never been diagnosed with an eating disorder, I'm not even sure I have one, but I definitely have a messed up relationship with food and maybe I just want a professional to validate that. Any of you guys who opened up about your issues, what made you want to? How did it turn out?
[Help] Protein powder recipes?
/u/Casablanca_Insomnia [5'3 | 102 | 18.63 | -21 | F]
Created: Sun Sep 18 20:30:02 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53fj0s/protein_powder_recipes/
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Hey, I've been lurking here for a while and I've finally built up the courage to post :)
I've been gifted a bunch of protein powder and I was wondering if anyone has any recipes that would be good to make with it. It's quite sweet so I was thinking about something along the dessert side of things. Any suggestions would be much appreciated!
[Thinspo] Is there any thinspo out there for big breasted women?
/u/OperatingOnScientist [5'3 | 128.6lbs | 23.41 | F | UGW 100lbs]
Created: Sun Sep 18 19:28:05 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53fa14/is_there_any_thinspo_out_there_for_big_breasted/
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Even at my skinniest my cup size has been fairly big, and I don't see that going significantly with weight loss, even at my UGW. Are there any thinspo pictures or models that I can relate to? All I see at the minute are my big boobs and it makes me feel very heavy and fat and it makes me feel like giving up :(
[Help] help for tomorrow
/u/hereyesarethesky [5'6" | 134.8 | 21.86 | -22 | UGW: 105]
Created: Sun Sep 18 19:25:44 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53f9o1/help_for_tomorrow/
---
ok first of all i used to use sync for reddit which didn't let me flair as far as i knew, so i switched to bacon reader and now i can flair my weight and stuff but i dont know how to flair my posts? tldr how the fuck mobile
anyways today has been horrible :( my nephew's birthday was three days ago, he turned one, so my family offered our house to host his birthday party. his mother (my sister-in-law) has a huge, HUGE family in more than one way that came to celebrate, and they all brought food. im talking 20+ people all brought food. who the heck planned this thing!!!
i ended up going on a pretty big binge then locking myself up in my room after ~2000 calories :/ i cried and made plans to go to the gym with my gym buddy. well we did but she's recovering from a cold so she didn't want to do a lot of cardio, and i tried telling her she could lift while i ran but she didn't want to do it alone so i only ended up w twenty minutes of cardio total which is not what i wanted or needed, yikes. so basically i burned nothing at the gym it felt like, and when i got home i ended up eating a leftover cupcake and probably 3+ servings of some mini rold gold pretzels because i got into that nasty mindset of "well it's already ruined why not" and i want to vomit but my mom screams at me when i do because she's scared of it and idk what to do anymore
what ive come here to ask is should i try fasting tomorrow (i usually restrict to around 700)? ive never done a full day fast because i go to the gym frequently, and although it isn't super strenuous exercise that i do im scared of fainting and all that good stuff. i just finally reached one of my goals and now ive probably ruined it for the time being and that's why im so upset
thank you for reading and maybe commenting, i really needed to get this off my chest(:
[Discussion] Low calorie Dunkin Donuts options?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Sep 18 18:22:04 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53f0aw/low_calorie_dunkin_donuts_options/
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[deleted]
[Other] Any other MFP users do this?
/u/throwaway0908123 [5'7 | 122.2 | 19.07 | -14.8 | F]
Created: Sun Sep 18 18:15:14 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53ezas/any_other_mfp_users_do_this/
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Telling myfitnesspal you calorie goal is a little over what it actually is (ex. my actual goal is 1000 but I tell MFP it's 1010) so that your number of calories remaining when you eat exactly your goal stays green instead of turning into a red zero.
[Rant/Rave] Today=trash
/u/setniessesed [5'11.5" | CW: 141 GW: 130 | 18.71 | -18lbs | 20/F]
Created: Sun Sep 18 18:00:37 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53ex02/todaytrash/
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Warning, wall of boring text ahead...I just need to rant a little cause for some reason today was such trash and I don't really have anyone I feel like I can vent to... Nothing bad even happened, I just felt like shit. Anxiety through the roof the whole day for some reason, extremely pissed as well. The first half of the day I restricted and kept it at 563 cals, and I just felt so awful; it was so damn hot outside and I was stupid and didn't drink nearly enough so I felt like I was going to pass out. Probably didn't help that I fasted yesterday I guess. But then I ate an apple and drank a bunch of water and now I feel so bloated and gross. Possibly having something to do with the fact I'm on my period. It gave me back some energy but not all that much, so I feel like it wasn't even worth eating now.
I finally got back to the new low weight after like a week and a half of overeating and subsequent fasting, but I'm not even that happy about it since I know the scale will probably be up tomorrow anyway since I ate today. And then I'll feel like a failure and want to binge... A small thing that made me happy today though was when I was eating dinner (pb sandwich) I got a cookie since it was in my cal limit, but I just picked it apart and felt all the grease/fatty stuff on my fingers and it just disgusted me that I just would shove that in my mouth. So I just left it on the plate and threw it away. I felt so in control and powerful, I so rarely ever feel like that and it felt great. I know wasting food is awful, but tbh I sort of feel like going there tomorrow, getting some small sweet and doing the same thing. Just to practice resistance and feel that in-control-ness again. I fucking love food so much but hate the way it makes me feel so much.
Since I felt like such trash the whole day I barely got anything done and tomorrow's monday, with uni assignments due. Greaaaat
[Help] Please help my Trader Joe's related anxiety :(
/u/brlouse [5'2 | 116.0 | 21.2 | -15 | F]
Created: Sun Sep 18 17:47:15 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53euwt/please_help_my_trader_joes_related_anxiety/
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So, today, I was checking out at trader joes, and the cashier broke the eggs of the people in front of me. She got raw egg on her hands, which she wiped on her shirt, and then kept checking out. Meaning, yes, she checked me out next, and touched all my food with her raw-egg hands. I am now too terrified to eat the things I bought - even the things that were packaged - because I'm afraid that the raw egg got on them and onto the food and now I'm going to get sick from it.
I feel ok about the two jars of stuff that I got, but I got a package of zucchini and cauliflower rice, which are logically entirely sealed and raw egg cannot penetrate plastic (right?) but my anxiety is going through the roof red alert on this one. Are the bananas ok too? Raw egg won't some how seep into those either right??
:|
[Goal] The first picture of any part of me in over a decade that doesnt make me want to die of shame.
/u/morose_adipose [5'2 | 90lbs | 17.05% | F]
Created: Sun Sep 18 14:58:27 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53e4oz/the_first_picture_of_any_part_of_me_in_over_a/
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https://i.redd.it/s6dkpdlfncmx.jpg
[Discussion] Who here is fed up with "foodieism" among your friends?
/u/sunkindonut149
Created: Sun Sep 18 14:28:34 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53dzrn/who_here_is_fed_up_with_foodieism_among_your/
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Now my roommate is watching a cooking show that features a fat man frying potatoes in butter. I said, that's a heart attack, and he basically called me an ignorant Philistine who doesn't get "good taste" because "that French guy isn't getting fat on "real" food" and "Americans are poor because we live in the hood".
Plenty of my naturally thin friends are also into the "foodieism" and call me an idiot for eating diet products that say "diet" on them, and drinking SlimFast. They define themselves by their "appreciation of food" which, to me, is the sin of gluttony.
Not only do they have to eat food they think is elite, they call the food I eat "garbage" and monotonous. My dad does the same thing.
Why is fatfree living seen as such a sin today?
[Intro] Why I Want to Lose Weight (also kind of a weird intro post)
/u/throwaway0908123 [5'7 | 122.2 | 19.07 | -14.8 | F]
Created: Sun Sep 18 14:14:47 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53dxds/why_i_want_to_lose_weight_also_kind_of_a_weird/
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I realized that I just jumped in here without a real intro post, and I figured this could double as one. I've never been overweight, but I've always been really insecure about my body. And I mean *always*. I remember being in first grade and hating to sit down because of the way my thighs spread out on the chair. I'm 5'7, which isn't *super* tall, but when I was a kid I moved to a city where everyone is really short, and I was taller than almost everyone my age by the 5th grade. I stick out like a sore thumb among my friends because of my height and general *largeness*. I feel like a clumsy, awkward giant lumbering around among all these adorable tiny little fairy people. After years of insecurity, I finally decided to do something about it. I started counting calories, which has turned into an obsession. It's hard to eat less than 1200 cals a day with parents watching everything I eat, but I try to restrict/fast whenever I can. I feel like I need to go lower, though, because my weight has been plateauing for over a month now and it's getting frustrating. I don't think I really have an eating disorder - I don't heavily restrict or purge or go on massive binges - but I have a pretty disordered relationship with food and I feel like I fit in here.
I just needed to write this down so I can look back at it when I'm feeling like giving up, and I don't know where else to put it besides here.
WHY I WANT TO BE THIN:
-Slender legs
-Thigh gap
-Flat stomach
-Skinny arms
-Thin fingers
-Crop tops
-Bikinis
-Defined jawline
-Over-the-knee boots/socks
WHY I DON'T WANT TO BE FAT:
-Legs that pancake out when I sit down
-Fat, lumpy stomach
-Flabby arms
-Puffy cheeks
-Fat knees/elbows
-Armpit fat
-Cellulite
-Dressing to cover up fat
-Awkwardness
-Shame
[Goal] nsv: mostly because i lack a scale
/u/gin-and-lemon [🐝 5'1"| cw: 155lbs | bmi: 30 | -7lbs | f ]
Created: Sun Sep 18 13:57:22 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53dudu/nsv_mostly_because_i_lack_a_scale/
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i lack a scale atm and thus, i have no idea if im actually losing.
or i thought i had no way to tell until i remembered the jeans.
i bought a pair of bdg jeans that were wayyy too tight for me when i was at my heaviest (160+ (i also did not have a scale until i got home from school, but i'm sure i was over that at some point)). i couldn't even get my legs in them. which was a damn shame because they're hella cute, and i refused to buy and larger sizes (out of shame). i remembered them today, and i'm sitting in them.
i'm in my tight af, cute, high waisted jeans. i don't feel like they're straining. they feel ... good???? i'm kind of in shock and needed to tell someone. its amazing? i didnt think i'd be in them this soon?
edit: fuck its a non scale goal, not non scale victory. i am really smart
[Help] Losing motivation and "cheat days"
/u/meredith3313
Created: Sun Sep 18 13:55:17 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53du1m/losing_motivation_and_cheat_days/
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I keep foolishly giving myself cheat days on the Weekend... basically just an excuse to binge. Every Monday then I step on the scale and see I gained 2 pounds or whatever and lose motivation. Any ideas how to stop this cycle and not overeat on weekends?
[Discussion] Restricting
/u/KajaIsForeverAlone [height:5'9 | CW: 147 BMI:21 | weight lost:15 lbs | Gender: F]
Created: Sun Sep 18 13:39:45 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53driw/restricting/
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What's your calorie max for the day? And do you have any food recommendations?
[Discussion] What is your opinion on diet soda while fasting?
/u/qwertyidklol [5'4" | 123.0 | 21.18 | -9.3 | F]
Created: Sun Sep 18 13:01:12 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53dkv9/what_is_your_opinion_on_diet_soda_while_fasting/
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I am fasting at the moment and wanted to know everyone's opinion on diet soda while fasting. Yay or nay and why?
I feel like the writers............
/u/PLLKNOWALL
Created: Sun Sep 18 12:24:37 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53delt/i_feel_like_the_writers/
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[removed]
[Thinspo] Thinspo in honour of today's continued fast. Thinner is winner.
/u/eightstone [Height: 5ft 7 | CW: 9st 12lbs| BMI: 21 | Gender: F]
Created: Sun Sep 18 12:24:12 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53deiz/thinspo_in_honour_of_todays_continued_fast/
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http://imgur.com/gallery/wjRXB
[Intro] Intro!
/u/watchesbooks [5'9" | 163 | 23.64 | -15| F]
Created: Sun Sep 18 11:19:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53d3p8/intro/
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So I've been trying to write this intro for........a while....I tend to get wordy but I'm trying to keep this short!
I played around with restricting my junior year of college, nothing crazy, just fell in love with the feeling of light-headedness (what a feeling of control!). I lost about 15 pounds before I went through some serious shit my senior year of college. Gained it all back, plus some.
I've never liked food, but really drank a lot. I was probably 25 pounds heavier than my lowest weight this past june, when I decided to half-way commit to losing weight. (I say half-way, because I *knew* alcohol was the problem, but continued drinking). I did lose about 5 pounds over the summer. Fully committed at the end of August, and have lost 11 pounds since then!
I'm so happy with my progress. I'm about 10 pounds away from my lowest weight, my clothes fit 1000x better (I'm now comfortably fitting into most of my old jeans and dresses), and my confidence is so much higher. The best part is that I feel like I haven't even been trying. **I don't do cardio**... after being an athlete my entire life, I'm done with that shit! I work out 2x/ week with a trainer, and have been trying to hit 9,000 steps/day (lololol), but mostly I've just been eating as little as possible and not drinking.
Since I haven't been drinking, I literally have no friends, and none of my acquaintances have commented on my weight loss. Makes me a little sad. But still very happy to have a downward trend :)
also, as a pianist, I'm looking forward to having thin, graceful arms instead of blubbery wings.
[Discussion] Daily Food Diary! September 18, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Sun Sep 18 10:02:28 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53cqym/daily_food_diary_september_18_2016/
---
This is a daily food diary thread for September 18, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
[Rant/Rave] [rant] obviously clothes are now my enemy
/u/thinkthinlythrowaway
Created: Sun Sep 18 09:50:18 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53cp0b/rant_obviously_clothes_are_now_my_enemy/
---
My pants that are usually too baggy now fit nicely. Nicely according to my boyfriend who says they make my butt look nice. Boyfriend who loveingly always tells me how much he enjoys my curves. That I have the perfect hourglass shape. That he thinks I'm cute.
Always that I'm cute. It's become my least favorite way to be described. I don't want to be cute anymore. I want to be beautiful, jaw dropping, elegant, sexy, thin.
I want him to be worried about other guys the way I am about other girls, hell I really want his body type the way he can just drop 20 by not eating so much junk food and get easily defined muscles by lifting. While I'm here constantly battling to lose 1 lb.
It's just the worst battle in the world. All of me knows it's my fault, I eat dinner to please him or eat in general so he doesn't get hurt. I no longer work out because I was passing out and I don't take the adhd meds anymore.
It would be easier if I wasn't with him, but he's the only one keeping me half sane anymore. He gives me at least some hope and fuck it sucks cause I just love him so much.
Anyways rant over and I can't freaking flair on this app and I apologize for that.
[Goal] First goal smashed!
/u/hazelconner [5'4" | 179.6 | 34.0% BF | -10.4 | X/F]
Created: Sun Sep 18 09:31:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53cm3v/first_goal_smashed/
---
I got on the scale and I was under 185!!! :D :D :D And almost a full two weeks earlier than I anticipated, too.
I'm gonna try to back off the EC stack this week, because I don't want to be too dependent on it. BUT I am rewarding myself with a trip to Lush!!! Their halloween stuff isn't in stores yet, but I have plenty of other five pound mile stones to go before 150.
[Goal] It's a baby gap but it's baaaacckkkkk!
/u/watchesbooks [5'9" | 163 | 23.64 | -15| F]
Created: Sun Sep 18 09:28:56 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53clm9/its_a_baby_gap_but_its_baaaacckkkkk/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/4b168d6a5c04478291561c8e9707fd7a?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=5a60aa968d1289a5ccb3fce115609178
[Help] Lunch situation at new job
/u/ED2134 [168cm | fat | female| -6kg]
Created: Sun Sep 18 09:02:38 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53chls/lunch_situation_at_new_job/
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I was wondering how you guys do lunches at work?
I'm starting a new job. The office is located at the airport. So all the food you can get there is a) fucking exensive and b) shitty jun food.
I thought about just bringing my own lunches. BUT appearently all my coworkers usually go and get lunch together at one of the restaurants. I guess if I don't want to stand out and be the weird new kid i have to join them. But i'm really not comfortable spending so much money on food that I do not enjoy. And I will have no idea how many calories I consume. That really freaks me out!
How do you guys do lunches at work? Any suggestions?
[Rant/Rave] After more than a month, I finally found a scale to weigh myself...
/u/aerienne [5'5" | 138 | 23.2 | -32 | F]
Created: Sun Sep 18 08:52:12 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53cg2g/after_more_than_a_month_i_finally_found_a_scale/
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...and it's in the middle of one of the most popular parks in the city. You know those old fashioned scales where you put in a coin and it weighs you? Yeah, it's one of those.
Nope, just nope. All of the stores seem to be out of scales and I can't order online yet since I had to order new bank cards. This is driving me mad.
In better news, I walked 10 miles today around the city and just had coffee. Going to see a Mozart and Vivaldi concert tonight and getting ready now. Good news, bad news.
[Other] My stomach really hurts so is it okay if I post this as a reminder for myself?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Sep 18 08:48:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53cfge/my_stomach_really_hurts_so_is_it_okay_if_i_post/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/d9f72e6b3fb548bb914d0e5719d1f120?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=33f51ed97437ac09293c8edf62541cae
[Discussion] Favorite veggies and ways to prepare them?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Sep 18 08:42:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53ceow/favorite_veggies_and_ways_to_prepare_them/
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My mom's been buying me Bok choy recently and it's great. She just boils it and doesn't add anything else like oil or salt.
**How I prepare it**
*~1-2 cups/236mL of Water
*One head of Bok choy
Heat up a pot of water. Once the water starts boiling, stuff the Bok choy in the pot, cover it with a lid, turn off the stove and let sit for 3 minutes*
Do you guys have any favorite veggies? How do you prepare them?
[Help] How many changes should I do at once?
/u/Mi__ra [165cm |50 kg | 18.6 | 0 | F]
Created: Sun Sep 18 08:39:50 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53ce9r/how_many_changes_should_i_do_at_once/
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I have talked before about trying to quit drinking and smoking. I haven't smoked in five days, but today I bought a couple of beers. But I did run 9 km this morning, getting my total for this week at 24 km, so apparently I have started to run again.
But, I'm just thinking. I have read so much how you should do major changes gradually and slowly, start with some small thing and go from there. That making too big or drastic changes are a way to fail.
My problem is this: drinking makes me want to smoke, but it also makes me want to binge and purge. B/p makes me want to drink and smoke. And if I do all of these, before long I am not able to run.
So I'm thinking that should I try to quit all of my bad habits at once? Like, just say fuck it, and finally start to resist the urge to b/p, drink *and*smoke and keep running? Because all these are so connected, but I'm afraid I'll fail.
Do you have experience of making major changes? Should I go little by little or try to address all my problems at once?
[Intro] i don't really know where else to go
/u/blairwaldorfmustpie [5'5 | 200+lbs | 35 | -26 | F]
Created: Sun Sep 18 07:59:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53c8rv/i_dont_really_know_where_else_to_go/
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i don't think i'm bad enough to say i have an ED, but my relationship with food feels like it's going downhill fast. i've been actively trying to lose weight since january and i was doing it healthily, but in may i got really weird with it, and since then it's like i either eat all day until i'm nauseous, or i don't eat a single thing. recently i started new medication that made me gain back some weight and i feel so stressed out and guilty for it, and i feel like i can only talk to my mom about the overeating, (she's dealt with it too, kind of) but if i bring up the not eating part she'll stop me and worry. i don't know, kinda ramble-y, sorry, i'm really scared of posting anything online but you guys seem real nice, and i don't know what do to but talk.
[Tip] I really love the aesthetic of all the monster zero cal energy drinks (esp the white and the black/red one). Plus they're textured cans and it's THE BEST
/u/goddamnroommate [5'6" | 143.8 | 23.30 | -50ish | F]
Created: Sun Sep 18 07:55:48 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53c8ab/i_really_love_the_aesthetic_of_all_the_monster/
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http://imgur.com/Xl9c3gp
[Rant/Rave] Not dead again, yet!
/u/sewnp [168/150/24.11/-62/NB/UGW:90]
Created: Sun Sep 18 07:49:36 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53c7kb/not_dead_again_yet/
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It's been a good while since I've last posted here and I figured I should post about some big events! Feel free to ignore and whatnot this is a rant/rave post.
I'm very incredibly close to breaking my plateau!!! I'm really incredibly happy about it but also worried because I know once I get under it, I'll just treat it the exact same way until my UGW. I unfortunately have relapsed into some bad habits but honestly losing weight is the only thing that makes me happy anymore. My friend (my fp for those of you who know about bpd's fun attachment patterns) got a boyfriend a handful of months ago and I've been really bitter and petty about it. I feel really awful and try to desperately hide these ugly emotions but I can't be around her when she talks so happily about him. How he's the ONLY person who's ever done this or shown interest in this thing she really loves. And I just get so upset that I want to kill myself just to get away from it. So half of it was because of that and the other half would probably be just that I (feel like) can't be loved by anyone. Honestly at this point even if I got thin enough to be attractive to people I wouldn't believe them. It's for ME and only me that I do this.
I always was taught as a kid to take care of others and treat your neighbor well etc. but in doing so every time I try to be a little selfish for my own benefit it's like the absolute worst thing I could do? Idk I'm moving back home soon and hopefully going to get on the therapy bandwagon again for my mental illnesses. So maybe after all of this I can finally do a little better. I have more experience now than I did before, so I'm still alive! Somehow haha.
Thanks for reading if you did read all of this. ☺️ I love you guys a lot. 💕💕💕
[Mobile/Rant]
[Help] What to do after a binge?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Sep 18 07:12:36 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53c334/what_to_do_after_a_binge/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] Fasting is hard
/u/downtownhomebound
Created: Sun Sep 18 07:08:20 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53c2mq/fasting_is_hard/
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I was planning on fasting from Friday to Tuesday (longest fast I've ever done, the most I've done before this was 36 hours) but today I could barely stand up for more than 2 minutes :( I feel so awful that I ate, I feel like such a failure! I made some ready-made soup and I couldn't even stand up to make it, I had to sit on a chair next to the stove to stir it around. My fast lasted for 70 hours, give or take a few minutes. I feel so weak for quitting :( I wonder if my max fast time is exactly that, like is that the longest I can make it? I'll have to try again soon... I didn't even feel hungry for 70 hours, just weak the last day. Sorry for the big rant, but thanks if you read it all the way through! Could really use some support right now <3
[Meme/Humor] When SnoopSnoo gets a little too real (aka me_irl)
/u/goddamnroommate [5'6" | 143.8 | 23.30 | -50ish | F]
Created: Sun Sep 18 05:54:17 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53bunh/when_snoopsnoo_gets_a_little_too_real_aka_me_irl/
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https://i.redd.it/6j9mhsgvy9mx.png
[Rant/Rave] I've hit a plateau for over a month now.
/u/vomitdogs [5'1 | Elephant | 19.6 | F]
Created: Sun Sep 18 05:30:17 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53bshz/ive_hit_a_plateau_for_over_a_month_now/
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I've fasted for 63 hours, I haven't had a single cheat day in close to 3 months, I've tried restricting to <300 calories, <600 calories and I've had a few higher calorie days that were 1200-1500. I've had days with lots of carbs, days with next to no carbs. I never go over my sugar goal and I try to get as much protein in my system as I can. I drink plenty of water, no drinks with calories.
I feel like I'm about to lose my shit here. What gives? WHAT DO I DO
[Rant/Rave] I missed this place.
/u/Tigerpede
Created: Sun Sep 18 03:15:55 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53bhjk/i_missed_this_place/
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Had to delete my last account Lupish_Ah because some friends found it, but I missed you guys. Missed being able to feel like being underweight was okay. Missed the sense that I was sane. Missed you guys.
[Intro] Hi
/u/Typhoid_Cat
Created: Sun Sep 18 03:03:17 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53bgk5/hi/
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I'm not sure how to make an intro , but I've had my ED since I was 13 , I am now 23. I just can't remove this from my life, its like a dark shroud hovering over me. Deep in my soul. My lowest was 100lbs , I was so proud but I couldn't see that I was at my goal, I'm 5'6.. I now know I need weight and measurements to feel like "safe"
But now I let myself get huge , and I can't take it anymore. I HAVE to get back my control.
I have lurked here a while and you are all so beautiful!
I hope to be someday ..
[Tip] If you're on mobile you can select desktop version and flair your post correctly.
/u/High_as_red [5'4 | F]
Created: Sun Sep 18 02:14:27 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53bct8/if_youre_on_mobile_you_can_select_desktop_version/
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https://www.reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53bct8/if_youre_on_mobile_you_can_select_desktop_version/
I get mad fun of for eating baby food.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Sep 18 02:12:20 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53bcnc/i_get_mad_fun_of_for_eating_baby_food/
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[deleted]
[Help] Yesterday was stupid question Saturday. But I have more
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Sep 18 02:08:59 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53bce6/yesterday_was_stupid_question_saturday_but_i_have/
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[removed]
[Help] Anyone else wear waist cinchers?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Sep 18 01:43:36 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53baga/anyone_else_wear_waist_cinchers/
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[deleted]
[Help] [Help] First fast! Any advice?
/u/pineapplesandham [5'3 | 95 lbs | 17.29 | -10 lbs | F]
Created: Sun Sep 18 01:16:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53b86h/help_first_fast_any_advice/
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[removed]
[Rant/Rave] Thank you for helping and inspiring me
/u/KajaIsForeverAlone [height:5'9 | CW: 147 BMI:21 | weight lost:15 lbs | Gender: F]
Created: Sun Sep 18 01:13:15 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53b7xo/thank_you_for_helping_and_inspiring_me/
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I'm new to this subreddit, but holy cow I feel so at home. I can relate to so much of this, and you guys are all so kind and helpful.
I used to feel alone. Only my best friend knows I have ED issues and he doesn't understand it. My mom, aunt, and grandma all have delt with bulimia, but none of them know I struggle too. But when I come here, I know I can talk to you guys about this shit and you all understand the struggle.
[Other] ED dreams?
/u/fuckyeahglitters [5'7 | 126 | 19.87 | -30 | F]
Created: Sun Sep 18 01:07:39 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53b7hw/ed_dreams/
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I just dreamed about binging and purging. Which is weird, since I rarely ever do this. I think it has something to do with losing 5 lbs recently after finally getting back on track after plateauing for so long. And Now I wanna b+p, lol. So tell me about your ED dreams!
[Thinspo] AHS thinspo ❤️ She's just so perfect Omygosh 😩
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Sep 18 00:31:18 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53b4dc/ahs_thinspo_shes_just_so_perfect_omygosh/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/bec1642d9963490481ee45c9de477452?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=1ba6024910f31e21671040cb15609904
[Meme/Humor] I wonder if some people think we are Pro-Erectile Disfunction
/u/ctrl_alt_mermaid
Created: Sat Sep 17 23:59:16 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53b1b8/i_wonder_if_some_people_think_we_are_proerectile/
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http://imgur.com/gjNSJxv
[Rant/Rave] Turning 21 in an hour and a half
/u/Alexa1p [5'5'' | 110 | 18 | -10.7 | F]
Created: Sat Sep 17 23:32:36 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53aytf/turning_21_in_an_hour_and_a_half/
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My boyfriend and I planned to head to a bar tonight but he fell asleep last minute and begged to reschedule. I understand because neither of us slept last night since we drove from San Jose to Los Angeles in the middle of the night last night, and only slept for about four hours this morning. But I'm kind of bummed because I was looking forward to going out tonight. I might go out alone to purchase alcohol and bring it back to drink alone. This post isn't really about food or disordered thoughts but this sub has become sort of a coping mechanism for me, so thank you all for listening. <3
[Help] I need help and tips! (Fasting)
/u/skinnylove73 [5'10 | 125 | 17.49 | -15 | F]
Created: Sat Sep 17 23:24:30 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53ay13/i_need_help_and_tips_fasting/
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[removed]
[Rant/Rave] Why do I even try to be social?!
/u/SkinnyisSexy [5'7.6 |128.4|gw115|19.6| F]
Created: Sat Sep 17 23:16:13 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53ax89/why_do_i_even_try_to_be_social/
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So forgive any mistakes on grammar I've been drinking.
I went to a party with a bunch of punk kids from my work k and stuffed my fat Gabber with chips and vodka. Had such anxiety I didn't fit in (I'm a pastel wearing fuck) got called a Tumblr girl. What is a Tumblr girl, is that an insult from punk kids? I feel fat and outlasted and I went home early. I didn't say bye to anyone I just dipped. I want to vomit up the chips I ate. Everyone there was skinnier than me I know it. I was the wierd anxious fat one.
I'm literally about to destroy my dorm
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Sep 17 22:03:06 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53apem/im_literally_about_to_destroy_my_dorm/
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[deleted]
[Help] oh no
/u/lovemyfragilebones [5'2" | 99 | 18.11/18.76 | -11 | gq 19]
Created: Sat Sep 17 21:30:47 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53alno/oh_no/
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I just read that artificial sweeteners 1) are addictive and 2) cause you to release more insulin which can lead to storing more body fat
help????????
I need encouragement. I keep fucking up.
/u/MeMyselfAndCarbs [5'3" | 112 | F]
Created: Sat Sep 17 21:15:03 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53ajuj/i_need_encouragement_i_keep_fucking_up/
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[removed]
[Rant/Rave] [Intro/Rant] On a day I was feeling okay
/u/abagofnudesloths
Created: Sat Sep 17 21:06:53 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53aitx/introrant_on_a_day_i_was_feeling_okay/
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Hey y'all, (I'm on mobile so I can't flair!)
Just wanted to introduce myself and share a frustrating story. I've dealt with disordered eating for years but I was never underweight so no one took it seriously. Since entering college I've gained ~50-60 pounds and I'm horrified. I was trying to lose weight the healthy way, but my ED brain made it impossible to treat food as anything but the enemy. Still I'm trying to take it day by day. I decided last night to treat myself and get a drink with my boyfriend and my best friend. I live in a big college town, so there were tons of people out at the bars. As I'm walking to my favorite bar, my bf and best friend are behind me and this skinny beautiful girl is in front of me. We're passing one of the bar's outdoor patios and there's a guy in his late 20s or 30s sitting there with a friend. As the skinny girl passes his table, he nods to his friend and says "Yes" while smirking. When I pass, he grimaces at me and really disgustedly says "no!"
So, I'm not dumb and he was clearly rating us on whether or not he'd fuck us/thought we were pretty/whatever. It's just so frustrating to me because I felt like I looked good and I was feeling okay, and some asshole totally ruins it for me with one word, ya know? I'm just feeling upset about it, because I already feel like people judge me and think I'm fat but to actually hear it was worse :(
[Goal] I think I'm getting back on track!!
/u/peanutbutteredbanana
Created: Sat Sep 17 20:06:16 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53ab6n/i_think_im_getting_back_on_track/
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I just exercised for the first time in two months. I feel great, I've always loved exercising. My calories for today were 800 and I'm so proud of myself. This last month has just been a mess for me and i finally said to myself "fuck it, I'm not gonna mope around anymore. im gonna get back to my old routine and achieve a beautiful body."
If any of you have been struggling, just know that you'll get back on the track to perfection soon. Sometimes we mess up, but that just gives us more motivation to work towards what we want. I'm rooting for all of you out there <3
side note- I just really love this community. I've never fit in anywhere more than here. You all are lovely people.
[Discussion] Does anyone eat their own vomit?
/u/copofteashirt
Created: Sat Sep 17 19:48:15 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53a8td/does_anyone_eat_their_own_vomit/
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Sorry if it's disgusting. Sometimes I feel like reversing my purge and I was wondering if anyone else has this illogical temptation.
Usually I only chew and spit, though.
(gosh, I don't think I could ask something like this in another sub! Ahahha)
[Thinspo] This person is the most stunning genderqueer thinspo
/u/hazelconner [5'4" | 179.6 | 34.0% BF | -10.4 | X/F]
Created: Sat Sep 17 19:16:05 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53a4km/this_person_is_the_most_stunning_genderqueer/
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http://imgur.com/a/Px7QK
[Help] terrified of going to college because of food stuff
/u/crapbeg
Created: Sat Sep 17 18:16:21 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/539woo/terrified_of_going_to_college_because_of_food/
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So I'm off to college in a few days, but I'm so, so scared to go.
I'm completely catered. That means that I have almost no control over what I eat, and have pretty much no idea about the specific calorie counts of my food.
I've been googling menus but I can't seem to properly find any indicator of what the food is like. I think there's a salad bar with every meal, but that's just not cutting it for me because I'm afraid of getting comments about just eating salad. How do I cope with this? I'm honestly not even that stressed about the whole process of moving, it's just that I can almost feel myself gaining weight and I feel sick just thinking about it.
[Help] Please help: losing my absolute shit rn
/u/celestulle [173cm | 53.6kg | 17.7 | -8.3kg | F]
Created: Sat Sep 17 18:14:29 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/539wg0/please_help_losing_my_absolute_shit_rn/
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OK, rational mind knoooooows this is an unreasonable thought process but here's the deal:
Yesterday, I ate *under* my allotted daily intake (i.e. 600kcal, ate 572) - which was cool for me - and certainly way under the day before yesterday's intake (~2000kcal - fucking WHOOPS).
Today, I stepped on the scales and it said that I have *gained* today.
Does anyone else absolutely lose their mind over this sort of shit? I am so sorry to sound like such a whingey brat. I can't tell anyone else how I am feeling.
[Other] [Other] My FitBit just arrived! Anyone want to add me as a friend?
/u/Im_A_Whale_AMA [5'3.5" | 103.8 lbs | 18.53 | ¯\_(ツ)_/¯]
Created: Sat Sep 17 17:42:43 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/539s84/other_my_fitbit_just_arrived_anyone_want_to_add/
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My FitBit Charge HR just arrived, and I'm really pumped to use it!
My link is (see edit) if you want to add me as a friend, and you can put yours in the comments if you'd like :)
Edit: I'm going to remove the link in a few hours, just for privacy reasons, so if it's gone, PM me and I will send you the link :)
[Thinspo] I love Manhattan
/u/flying_rubber_duck [5'0" | 156.6 | 32.21 | -23.4 | F]
Created: Sat Sep 17 17:37:18 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/539ri2/i_love_manhattan/
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It is legit being surrounded by thinspo all day long. God I love it.
[Help] Can someone explain net calories to me?
/u/TiredOfBeingFat_ [6'0"| CW251 |BMI34 | 22lost | GW130]
Created: Sat Sep 17 17:11:35 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/539nu7/can_someone_explain_net_calories_to_me/
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So my net calories after fasting for most of the day thanks to my ADHD meds are 500 through exercise. I can eat these back and still technically be at "zero" calories right? I don't know. It's confusing me and I can't find anywhere else online that can explain it right.
If I had it my way I wouldn't be eating at all today. But family dinners. Bleh.
[Rant/Rave] I have absolutely no way of planning my food
/u/smallsmallersmallest [168cm | CW 50.9kg GW 46kg | 18.09 | -10.1kg | F]
Created: Sat Sep 17 16:30:14 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/539htc/i_have_absolutely_no_way_of_planning_my_food/
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I live with my family still so although breakfast and lunch are up to me, dinner isn't, it's whatever my mum cooks. Problem is, even she often doesn't know what's for dinner until she goes out to the shop at 4 or 5 pm to buy the stuff for it. This makes it so hard to think and plan ahead, I have no idea what tomorrow's gonna be like, I have no idea what I'm eating until it's in front of me a lot of the time. I know that meal planning isn't her thing though, occasionally she'll get on top of it for a while and I can know what every meal is going to be for the next 6 days, but she doesn't keep it up for long. I'm not blaming her or trying to badmouth her, it's just difficult and I know you guys will understand.
senior pictures
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Sep 17 16:16:38 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/539fv5/senior_pictures/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] [Rant] Facebook food videos
/u/thirdocean
Created: Sat Sep 17 15:52:02 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/539c8z/rant_facebook_food_videos/
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On mobile so no real flair :(
Facebook disgusts me lately. Even watching the food videos people share disgust me. One literally said "If you like apples you'll love this DEEP FRIED APPLE RECIPE" like wtf. I swear they take normal foods and either soak them in butter and melt cheese on it or deep fry it. I makes me feel like I'm gonna throw up just seeing it. And when the people who share it are like 400lbs and talking about their new diets I'm like yeah fuckin right guys. It just makes me so upset to see and idk.
[Thinspo] Found some great reverse thinspo on YouTube ^^
/u/Sonnenblumenschein [5'3.5" | 91.5 lbs | 16.0 | -63.5 lbs]
Created: Sat Sep 17 15:35:06 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5399of/found_some_great_reverse_thinspo_on_youtube/
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https://youtu.be/Qc1A01JHUnY
[Other] Made this short diary comic after a complete autopilot post-weight panic attack. PS. They worked, but at what cost?
/u/nerrdygrrl15 [5'5" | 99.4 lbs | 16.54]
Created: Sat Sep 17 13:04:05 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/538m6j/made_this_short_diary_comic_after_a_complete/
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http://imgur.com/hP9694I.jpg
[Goal] [Goal] 103!!!!
/u/lordjoji [5'3" | CW: 103 lbs | 18.75 | GW: 100 lbs | F]
Created: Sat Sep 17 12:57:19 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/538l3s/goal_103/
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I've been stuck at 106-105 for such a long time and after my 24 hr fast yesterday, I got on the scale and it said 103 lbs!! I know that after the fast some will come back but right now I feel so happy and motivated ☺️ Only 3 more pounds till my GW!
[Thinspo] Need good boy thinspo? Tumblrs?
/u/Space-Punk [5'11" | -31lbs | 20M]
Created: Sat Sep 17 12:34:20 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/538hb6/need_good_boy_thinspo_tumblrs/
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I'm searching high and low for good male thinspo, I don't like the stuff where they're really toned I like the thinspo where they're actually skinny. I could use some obscure tumblrs (I've found like 30) but anything is greatly appreciated, I'm trying to build an album. Thanks!
[Rant/Rave] [rave] yey for magic bullets
/u/littleIceBear [4' 10" | 99 | F]
Created: Sat Sep 17 12:21:20 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/538f5f/rave_yey_for_magic_bullets/
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Cant flair, mobile :c
So i finally got my refil of Modafinil, 2 days, 5lb down (buh bye carbwater!), and im happy and focussed again.
I have a laundry list of neuro probs thanks to childhood PTSD and Moda makes it go away significantly. The lack of appetite and less struggling with food is a huge bonus tho.
Its nice to feel hopeful again.
[Goal] I can't believe my eyes right now
/u/rosepurplesoup [5'10" | 149 | 20.84 | -33 | F]
Created: Sat Sep 17 12:18:28 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/538eo6/i_cant_believe_my_eyes_right_now/
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The scale said a little under 151. ONE FIFTY ONE. I haven't been less than 155 in four years. Holy shit. That was even after a huge binge yesterday. I can't believe this. I know my next goal is 140, so it's weird to actually be close to that number, rather than 30 pounds away.
[Thinspo] Yolanda Vi$$er Zef thinspo 😍
/u/cry_baaby
Created: Sat Sep 17 11:54:12 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/538apn/yolanda_vier_zef_thinspo/
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https://m.imgur.com/a/YPnOx
[Thinspo] More thinspo to inspire through today's fast
/u/eightstone [Height: 5ft 7 | CW: 9st 12lbs| BMI: 21 | Gender: F]
Created: Sat Sep 17 11:34:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5387ig/more_thinspo_to_inspire_through_todays_fast/
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http://imgur.com/gallery/tFOh7
[Goal] Broke plateau by partying!!
/u/cry_baaby
Created: Sat Sep 17 11:03:03 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5382e8/broke_plateau_by_partying/
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I've been stuck at this weight for like 2 weeks, ugh. But last night I went to a party, chugged 3 low cal monster energy, danced, took melatonin to sleep, had really fucking weird dreams, and woke up FOUR lbs lighter !! Probably just water weight, but I'm gonna restrict even harder <3
[Meme/Humor] Gotta go buy
/u/Peretticoffee
Created: Sat Sep 17 10:13:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/537uoq/gotta_go_buy/
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http://i.imgur.com/QuvtfWV.jpg
[Discussion] Daily Food Diary! September 17, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Sat Sep 17 10:02:22 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/537swa/daily_food_diary_september_17_2016/
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This is a daily food diary thread for September 17, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
[Help] 3 pieces of pizza & it's not even 11 A.M...
/u/littlecinnamonroll [5'6'' | CW: 136 | -65 | F]
Created: Sat Sep 17 09:50:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/537r4f/3_pieces_of_pizza_its_not_even_11_am/
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Ugh. I want to die right now. I need to stop leaving leftover pizza in the fridge.
I work from 12-5 so at least I know I won't be able to stuff my face during those hours, but still...I was hoping I could at least make it until dinner before eating.
I have no idea how many calories were in these pieces of pizza, so now I have no idea if I'm going to accidentally go over my calorie goal today.
I may just not eat anything else today. Why do I insist on setting myself up for failure!
Anyone have any words of encouragement? :(
[Goal] I decided to make a pretty goal list too! Any suggestions for rewards?
/u/fluorescentpig
Created: Sat Sep 17 09:19:19 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/537mi9/i_decided_to_make_a_pretty_goal_list_too_any/
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http://imgur.com/v1roKSI
[Discussion] Coping mechanisms?
/u/kickkkasss [5'5 | CW:134 | GW:110 | F]
Created: Sat Sep 17 09:02:17 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/537jzv/coping_mechanisms/
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On mobile can't flair sorry!
I'm trying to find some healthy ways to let some shit out. I like to run and I recently realized writing helps, but what are some coping mechanisms you guys use when life is just too much?
[Help] Victories are so short lived
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Sep 17 06:58:01 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/537458/victories_are_so_short_lived/
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[deleted]
[Discussion] 'Stupid Questions' Saturday! September 17, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Sat Sep 17 06:02:24 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/536y06/stupid_questions_saturday_september_17_2016/
---
This is the weekly 'Stupid Questions' Saturday thread for September 17, 2016.
Use this thread as an opportunity to ask any questions you might have that you feel don't necessarily warrant their own post.
Please be wary of false advice and information. Be sure to research the facts before taking anyone's advice, no matter who they are. Remember that diagnosing members is unacceptable. **Anyone looking for medical guidance should seek the opinion of a medically licensed professional.**
*****
Have any questions or concerns? Comment below, or [PM the mods.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FproED)
[Discussion] Dae find seeing people confident in their own bodies more thinspirational than looking at skinnier people?
/u/Itsemurha [177cm|CW 67kg| GW: 55kg | SW:120kg |20.9| F]
Created: Sat Sep 17 05:52:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/536wz7/dae_find_seeing_people_confident_in_their_own/
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Honestly, they can be any size but when I see people happy in their own bodies and flaunting them it makes me feel so inspired to improve myself and lose weight so that one day maybe I could do the same and have that kind of confidence.
In reality, that will probably never happen since my body has been absolutely destroyed by dramatic weight loss but damn it that won't stop me from trying >:(
[Tip] Thispso TV series
/u/ctrl_alt_mermaid
Created: Sat Sep 17 03:11:13 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/536jlw/thispso_tv_series/
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So the times when I'm most likely to binge is when I'm watching TV, which I do a lot of. My weekends consist of the same thing ever weekend. Get up, go to the gym in the morning, come home, then watch TV and binge all damn day. It's so frustrating because I'm so good all week then I just go and fuck it all up on the weekend. I've gotten into this cycle of watching TV and eating because I live alone so often have dinner in front of the TV. I've been doing it for years. I can't exactly "just stop watching tv". It's not even that I enjoy it, I just have nothing else to do. I'm seriously not exaggerating when I say I have no friends so it's not like I can just go hang out with people or do some fun group activity. I can go for a walk or something but that covers like an hour, what about the rest of the day. I used to sit and smoke all day but I quit a few years back, which apparently I swapped for eating which is where the ED originally started. Now I'm just babbling, sorry.
Anyway, I watched gossip girl a while ago and seeing how skinny Sarina was really kept me from stuffing my face and day. But I've finished watching the series, does anyone know any other good thinspo series I can watch?
[Discussion] Ingrained memories?
/u/CoconutTime
Created: Sat Sep 17 02:16:10 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/536f6n/ingrained_memories/
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Anyone else have random ingrained memories/quotes from people about your weight or body that you constantly replay in your head? I have about 10 quotes I'm always thinking about in regard to myself.
Some bad. Some good.
One is when a boy said to me, "are you jealous of Julia because she's skinnier than you?" This one resonated hard because the girl from the quote opened to me about suffering from an ED in her past and she could tell I had one as well (she said she recovered) she would always comment on how tiny I was and was always trying to get me to eat. She even tried fitting into my shorts once (they didn't fit her) to show myself that I was thin. The boy who said this knew I struggled with body image and also hated the girl and the whole comment didn't set well I don't think I'll ever forget it.
Another one is when me and this Cali boy I met were talking about medical marijuana and he was telling a group of us how it's so easy to get prescribed for it in California. I said I wanted it and he googled a list of reasons they prescribe it and everyone was looking at them and he stopped on 'anorexia' and said, "that's the one you could use easily- you're so skinny!" And everyone agreed I could get away with that one. It's actually pretty funny because I am anorexic and had to be like, "oh yeah I could lie about that one......"
[Discussion] Do you feel your personal goals effects your professional life?
/u/Mobilebutts
Created: Sat Sep 17 01:02:16 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53699u/do_you_feel_your_personal_goals_effects_your/
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Male/115lbs/5'7"
i have to bulk up for my job which sucks. I'm currently at my goal after a couple years of work slimming and toning, but in my current state I cannot lift engines or break bolts like I used to.
I am now eating more and bulking up not for personal pleasure but so I can do my job. Anyone else out there weight and shape goals are being challenge by their occupation? I'm going back to school and looking forward to being a manager just so I don't have to do as much manual labor which makes me a lot bigger.
[Rant/Rave] *graphic* Very rarely throw up, but tonight I threw up twice.
/u/Para-Medic [5'1' | too much | too much |0 | F]
Created: Sat Sep 17 00:44:20 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5367q2/graphic_very_rarely_throw_up_but_tonight_i_threw/
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I drank way too much alcohol tonight. I threw up from an upset stomach. I felt gross after spitting up all over and around my toilet. I pissed all over myself with every expulsion. I've had 3 kids and yes, my kegel muscles are incredibly loose now. I got in the shower and threw up even more. I left chunks of undigested tomato and pasta all over my shower floor. My nose was on fire.
I have never been a purge person. Today, the amount I've put in my body made me feel so disgusted. I never wanted to throw up again.
[Rant/Rave] irl friend
/u/gin-and-lemon [🐝 5'1"| cw: 155lbs | bmi: 30 | -7lbs | f ]
Created: Sat Sep 17 00:11:27 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5364m8/irl_friend/
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so my roommates girlfriend gave ed vibes, and we were talking about life and shit while i was reading her cards and she let slip that she has one and i was like shit me too and now i have an irl friend who gets this shit??
idk we're going to start running together and she got me to download an app so we can be friends on it and she wants to meal prep together???? a weird nice thing???
[Rant/Rave] Rant: When people make food plans with you then flake.
/u/kelseyjodiepen
Created: Sat Sep 17 00:02:55 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5363sa/rant_when_people_make_food_plans_with_you_then/
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So long story short my boyfriend told me the other day he was going to make dinner for me tonight. Sweet right? Well I actually wanted to eat what ever he made me so I saved all of my calories today so I could eat with him and not go over my limit. Well I got home and shock fucking shock he forgot all about making me dinner and ordered himself pizza early in the night. I'm so pissed. I feel hurt and forgotten and hungry and all I want to do is binge.
:*( This sucks.
[Meme/Humor] My life.
/u/paintmegrey
Created: Fri Sep 16 23:25:29 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/536046/my_life/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/cb152660a9e04d6994a1047e60469c36?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=8d435e23cc33f18acb5ea85e498eb86b
[Discussion] Please help me. How do you get to sleep at night.
/u/soberasfuck
Created: Fri Sep 16 23:00:00 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/535xgm/please_help_me_how_do_you_get_to_sleep_at_night/
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I find it so difficult to sleep at night, especially on an empty stomach. The only solution I have is alcohol but that results in shitty sleep and has a fuck ton of calories. It's even worse on the days I take stimulants/adderall. Are there any meds that you have found helpful, or any helpful tips you might have?
[Other] Flesh and Bone - Holy shit.
/u/cannibale101 [5'4 | HW:150smtg | CW: heh | GW:108 | 28F]
Created: Fri Sep 16 22:35:03 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/535upp/flesh_and_bone_holy_shit/
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Holy shit i don't know who to share this to, even to my boyfriend i'm not comfortable (he knows i went through some bad stuff but honestly that's a part of our otherwise amazing relationship that i never fully shared with him, sensing he wouldn't stomach it).
I discovered the series Flesh and Bone on here yesterday and watched a few episodes. Holy shit it's unbelievable. I've never been a ballerina and i don't even tend to get thrilled by traumatizing shit in movies or anything, but THIS. This i relate to. This i watch every bit of, and i savour its ugliness at its most. I feel it, i live it. Damn. It speaks to me so deeply, i know it, it's like i wrote it. Holy shit. There, it's said.
[Discussion] Does anyone else get almost narcoleptic sleepy after a meal?
/u/beautyandbeast5 [5'2 | 118lb | 22 | -47.5lb | F]
Created: Fri Sep 16 22:15:05 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/535sgl/does_anyone_else_get_almost_narcoleptic_sleepy/
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I tried to start eating some carbs again but I've been pushed back to keto because anything over 10g/20g of carbs literally knock me out. I'll fall asleep almost anywhere I am - at home, lecture theatre, once I even had to take a break on a park bench and woke up 3 hours later. I get that food makes you sleepy but THIS much?! I vaguely remember that when I was obese I experienced something similar after every lunch, but definitely not since I hit normal weight a few years ago. I have been eating a lot less this year and I wonder if that's got anything to do with it - idk. I really hope one of you guys has gone through something similar so you can tell me what's going on. The overwhelming urge to just fall asleep any time I eat is a tiny bit scary.
Flair as discussion please (on mobile).
Edit: OH HEY WE CAN FLAIR ON MOBILE NOW :D
[Goal] I'm asking for help for once, and it feels pretty good!
/u/WorstCunt [donkey brain]
Created: Fri Sep 16 21:43:39 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/535ovs/im_asking_for_help_for_once_and_it_feels_pretty/
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I have spent who knows how long pretending this is a non-issue, that this doesn't affect my studies, that it's just a thing that kind of gets in the way but not really (even though I've missed classes in order to binge and purge)
But I have finally come out to my uni and said YES! I am a wreck, and as a wreck, I need some assistance.
Oddly, I feel liberated by it. But I thought I'd feel ashamed, and I'm not. There's nothing wrong with me needing this help. And I feel a bit of a fool for not taking it sooner.
I used to think that I had accepted my issues, but the fact that I couldn't ask for help until now was a sign I had not. Now I have, and I feel great. It doesn't have to be MY problem anymore.
Ya, so this is just a venting post, but maybe someone else can take something from it :))
*EDIT: I will also update this and maybe make a new post when my uni counsels me*
New here? Introducing myself?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Sep 16 21:16:00 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/535lhp/new_here_introducing_myself/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] Purging in a new apartment (mini rant, gross)
/u/OneEyedOneHorned [69" | 196lbs | 29 | 80lbs | Other]
Created: Fri Sep 16 20:57:37 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/535j90/purging_in_a_new_apartment_mini_rant_gross/
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It had been a while since I last purged but yesterday I had a really fucked up day and decided to fuck it up more by bingeing. What I didn't realize is this apartment's layout and the bathroom are not conducive to purging easily. The toilet's in a weird position and I already DO NOT like putting my face close to one, even one I just cleaned for the purpose of putting my face close to it. When I lived with my mother, I would just run the sink and be disgusting/puke into my hand and break up the chunks before washing them down the sink. However the bathroom sink barely can get water down, the stopper doesn't come out, and I've already dumped a whole bottle of drain cleaner down it. The kitchen sink is right next to the door so if someone were to come in, I would have absolutely no time to hide what I was doing.
Yesterday I puked into a big bowl and dumped it in several grocery bags, tied tightly, that I then ran down and put in the dumpster. This set-up is awful and I don't know what I'm doing.
It's weird that when we look to find a new place, that "comfortable purging facilities" will be something on my mind.
[Help] bloated for two weeks
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Sep 16 20:50:14 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/535icd/bloated_for_two_weeks/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] I'm tired of being aware
/u/c_marier [5'6"| 112 | 18.1 | -13 | 22F]
Created: Fri Sep 16 19:19:33 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5356b0/im_tired_of_being_aware/
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I got really drunk both nights last weekend and it was great, I was with friends, and I didn't even feel bad about the calories consumed (I mean, yeah, I made up for it the next day, but the during was a blissfully normal mindset) and I'm craving that feeling again.
It's like the only time I'm not obsessing over calories and my level of hunger and painfully aware of every bite/temptation/other girl's weight/the way my jeans fit/mirror reflections/people looking at my body/my thighs when I sit/fat content/carbs/what other girls are eating/sugar grams all at once is when I'm drunk. Not tipsy, because there I'm still hesitating over another shot etc thinking about the calories. WHY ARE THERE SO MANY FUCKING CALORIES IN ALCOHOL????
Anyway, home being lame alone tonight and I usually have a rule about not drinking alone, but idk, maybe it's going to be an exception.
[Discussion] DAE get head/face tension almost like they are about to get a nosebleed?
/u/clearbeacon [5'2" | 110 (belly fat) | 20.67 | 15LB | F]
Created: Fri Sep 16 18:33:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/535069/dae_get_headface_tension_almost_like_they_are/
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I'm just curious if anyone else gets this weird feeling... almost like my nose feels cold or face feels tingly right around my nose. It's sometimes accompanied by a similar tingling sensation near the crown of my head, and even though I can't ever remember having a nosebleed, it's what I imagine the precursor to one would be.
[Rant/Rave] It's a bad week.
/u/Superderg
Created: Fri Sep 16 17:55:19 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/534usy/its_a_bad_week/
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Ugh. I was on vacation last week and binged a bit, but exercised a ton (like hiked 25km over 4 days). I logged everything. It wasn't perfect, but over the week I averaged 1400 which is my "lose 2lbs a week" amount. But it was my week before shark week so insane bloating so I didn't lose anything. Then this week it's shark week and I'm STARVING. like holy hell. It's finally wearing off but I had 2 big binges beginning of this week and I can't restrict enough to really recover it. I've kind of accepted it surprisingly. I mean, I work off mon-sun weeks, so I know next week it'll be big restrictions and the water weight will drop. Just a bit of a rant I guess, just a vent to remember to stay on track next week. Thanks, stay lovely!!
[Discussion] Ballet Beautiful anyone?
/u/littlecinnamonroll [5'6'' | CW: 136 | -65 | F]
Created: Fri Sep 16 17:24:26 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/534q90/ballet_beautiful_anyone/
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I'm admittedly not a ballet dancer, but I've always had so much appreciation and love for the art, so when I stumbled upon the Ballet Beautiful workouts one day...I fell in love instantaneously.
I love that the workouts are challenging but not to the point that I feel like stuffing my face after them like I do from more cardio-intensive exercise. I also feel pretty while doing it.
Anyone else here a BB fan? Which of her workouts are your favorites?
[Meme/Humor] MRW when I recognize a behavioral pattern that gets me off track every. damn. time.
/u/finch_love [5'6" | 165.8 | 26.73 | -54.4 | F]
Created: Fri Sep 16 17:20:14 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/534plj/mrw_when_i_recognize_a_behavioral_pattern_that/
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http://i.imgur.com/ZvqRqq8.gifv
[Help] How do y'all have energy to work out?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Sep 16 17:14:31 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/534osq/how_do_yall_have_energy_to_work_out/
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[removed]
[Other] Lowest weight since 8th grade? Better EAT THE SHIT out of some fried ass wings!
/u/KlokWerkN [5'9" | 130 | 19.2/18.85 | -57 | F]
Created: Fri Sep 16 16:48:19 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/534kz3/lowest_weight_since_8th_grade_better_eat_the_shit/
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The cycle of hate continues.
[Help] How to deal with stomach pains and other digestive issues?
/u/scyphomedusae [5'7" | 116 lbs | 18.56 | -20 | F]
Created: Fri Sep 16 16:42:23 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/534k38/how_to_deal_with_stomach_pains_and_other/
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I've been plagued with severe gastritis/stress ulcers for years and my history of purging and fasting doesn't help very much. I take Omeprazol, but I've been looking for other non-medicine ways to help me with the pain since scheduled eating is the most recommended one lol (*blablabla don't ever go 3 hours without eating!!!! don't ever let your stomach go empty!!!!! blah*)
Usually I drink lots of chamomile/peppermint tea and it helps me more than anything else - it's tasty, relaxing and safe! - but I'd like very much to hear your ideas and methods if anyone wants to share :)
[Rant/Rave] I'm getting worse
/u/AmAlreadyGoingToHell [H: 5"8 W: 129 GW: 110 F]
Created: Fri Sep 16 16:03:51 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/534e3y/im_getting_worse/
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And I wonder how it's possible people don't see it? Do they just don't care?
The circles under my eyes are bigger than they were. I'm paler. I smile less and less. I suddenly always wear thights again, you know I used to self harm there..
I just want you to care. To tell me that maybe one day I'll be fine and you'll be here with me.
I can't do this alone
[Meme/Humor] how I feel when I'm high on being hungry
/u/smallpaint [6'2" | 165.2lb | M]
Created: Fri Sep 16 16:03:05 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/534dy8/how_i_feel_when_im_high_on_being_hungry/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/e21cf16ff8ea4294a241f5adcf7c2c41?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=2b30edd0f13a7e52d92b134d9f31c70f
[Help] Keto?
/u/eldariya [6'3"/190CM | CW:134/60KG | GW: 130/58KG | 15.8 | -132/60KG | M]
Created: Fri Sep 16 15:15:13 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5345vy/keto/
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Hey, you've probably seen me here before talking about flavoured lube and dick pics but my new question is keto??
I'm currently 140lbs/63kg and 190cm/6'3" and I have no idea what I'm doing rn, for the last literally 15lbs I've been eating terribly just little amounts and I'm interested in keto.
Would keto help me shift off a final 10 or so lbs quickly because I've just hit 140.2 and I know for a fact the 130's will be hard lol.
[Help] I have a mission for y'all.. [advice]
/u/SoFetchBetch [67.75" | 109.4lbs | 16.61 | 19lbs | F | GW: 107 lbs or 16 bmi]
Created: Fri Sep 16 13:55:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/533s55/i_have_a_mission_for_yall_advice/
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I have been trying to figure out the lowest calorie fish or seafood. Seafood is a great source of omega 3s and protein. Great for skin, nails and hair as well as overall health! So far I've been under the impression that shrimp was the highest protein to calorie ratio seafood. And I love shrimp so thats all good. But now I'd like to know the lowest calorie fish and it seems to be really difficult to get a solid answer on that..
I did learn that tilapia is pretty much worthless nutritionally:
http://www.eatthis.com/tilapia-is-worse-than-bacon
I also learned that salmon decreases insulin levels ans inflammation. So I'm gonna be eating more wild salmon for sure. But its quite fatty. I just want to know my safe fish!
If anyone has any insight they could offer I'd be super thankful :)
[Discussion] I need your opinions...
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Sep 16 11:58:30 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53372t/i_need_your_opinions/
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[deleted]
[Tip] Cooking Hack: Replace all the Wet Ingredients in Cake Mix with a can of 100% Pumpkin for super fudgy low cal brownies!
/u/winterpopp [ 5'7" | GW: <100 | F22]
Created: Fri Sep 16 11:50:11 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5335jo/cooking_hack_replace_all_the_wet_ingredients_in/
---
I was at the thrift store the other day and found a Hungry Girl 200 Calorie and Under cookbook.
I made one of the recipes today, cheesecake brownies. Basically you take a 15 oz can of pumpkin and mix it with a box of devil's food cake. Put it in a pan sprayed with nonstick spray, and bake at 400°F for 20-25 minutes. If you use a rectangular cake pan and cut it into 16 pieces, that's 110 calories a brownie. You cant even taste the pumpkin! It doesn't quite taste like brownies tho, it's like a mix of brownies and pudding cake, still tasty for the calories imo.
(I'm not including the cheesecake swirl calories because that was a waste of time, you can barely taste it against the brownies, but if you are interested in adding it to the recipe it is 6 oz fat free cream cheese, 1/4 cup splenda, 1 tsp powdered vanilla sugar free coffee creamer, and 1/4 tsp vanilla extract. Beat together, drop onto the brownie batter once you put it in the pan and swirl with a butterknife).
I am terrible at taking attractive food pictures so sorry if this looks gross but here is the final result: http://m.imgur.com/NnFq0X0 . I used a square pan so if you make this it wont come out quite as thick.
Anyways, hope this helps anyone with a brownie/cake craving!
[Discussion] [Discussion] How do you see other people?
/u/idkjust [5'9" | 130.6lbs | 19.29 | -15 | F]
Created: Fri Sep 16 11:47:19 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/53351j/discussion_how_do_you_see_other_people/
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Of course everybody on this sub is critical of themselves, but what about other people? Do you think everybody is thinner than you? Do you look at others and think "she could lose some weight off her arms"? Do you wonder if every other skinny person has an eating disorder?
[Thinspo] daily thinspo to get me through today's fast
/u/eightstone [Height: 5ft 7 | CW: 9st 12lbs| BMI: 21 | Gender: F]
Created: Fri Sep 16 11:40:06 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5333rd/daily_thinspo_to_get_me_through_todays_fast/
---
http://imgur.com/gallery/hYGEn
[Help] How many calories would you say are in a buttered roll?
/u/supersizetrainwreck [5'9 | CW 125lb | 18.13 | F]
Created: Fri Sep 16 11:32:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5332f3/how_many_calories_would_you_say_are_in_a_buttered/
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http://imgur.com/a/DQLD2
[Rant/Rave] I wear my failure on my body everywhere I go.
/u/Thunder2WonderThighs
Created: Fri Sep 16 11:04:38 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/532x8f/i_wear_my_failure_on_my_body_everywhere_i_go/
---
I'm engulfed in it, smothered by it. It's always there reminding me what a fucking weak pathetic failure I am. I grab it in my hand and wish I could rip it off of me, but it's a part of me--the physical embodiment of my consistent personal failings. And I feel like I'll never be free of it.
[Goal] Big moment for me last night
/u/salamanderqueen [5'9"| CW: 149 | SW: 180 | GW: 120 | -31 | 19F]
Created: Fri Sep 16 10:24:14 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/532pvs/big_moment_for_me_last_night/
---
I'm on a competitive speaking team at my school, and we had practice last night. I've known most of these people since last year, when I was at my highest weight. Our coach brought in a box of cookies for us last night, and I turned it down! My coach commented "salamanderqueen has willpower!" and my teammates made similar comments. It felt so good to be the only person in the room not eating (no shame to those who were- cookies are fucking amazing). I used to NEVER be able to turn down treats like that, and I'm so proud of myself now.
[Rant/Rave] ugh i'm such a fuck up
/u/hayleystark [5'4"|NB]
Created: Fri Sep 16 10:12:50 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/532ntt/ugh_im_such_a_fuck_up/
---
i have been doing so well eating this week until today. i can't keep buying all this fast food. i just want my control back :( how do you keep yourself accountable? i just can't seem to. ugh.
obligatory on mobile cant flair :( rant/rave if possible!
[Rant/Rave] I think i've made a breakthrough that will help me get back to losing (lots of food talk, i wouldn't read if i were fasting)
/u/goddamnroommate [5'6" | 143.8 | 23.30 | -50ish | F]
Created: Fri Sep 16 10:08:45 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/532n2f/i_think_ive_made_a_breakthrough_that_will_help_me/
---
I work in a store that sells ice cream. Specifically I work in an obscenely sweet store that Aziz Ansari may or may not have had a comedic bit on.
Anyway, this means that there are open packages of reeses, oreos, twix, brownies, cookies, cookie dough. All on top of the ice cream. I know a lot of people arent enticed by these things, but they are basically all of my weaknesses. It used to be out of control (i worked there when i was officially overweight), and then I got it under control and recently had only been working saturdays. So id restrict and fast once or twice a week and end up with like 6000-8000 calories on the one day, which would usually nullify any progress id made. it was infuriating. Then i got switched stores to a more managerial position to teach the piss-poor workers at that store. But that meant not just working Saturdays.
But the surprising thing is that i've actually been doing quite well. Only having mini-binges that can be accounted for and dealt with (ie 700-1000 calories). I can just eat less "real" food the days I work and work out more, and it's still a "successful" day. Most recently, I actually only had 400 calories. I know that sounds like a lot, but it's being surrounded by my greatest temptations for 6+ hours and not giving in. so I'm pretty proud of it.
The breakthrough, however, came when I thought about it. I think it's the fact that I need to be an example. The fact that my role there is to show others how to be, so i feel like im being constantly critiqued. There's a bit of that feeling in my day to day life, but nowhere near this intensity. I think I'm going to work on harnessing how that feels and using that to my advantage, not just in the store.
It's kind of exciting. I used to dread working there, feeling like I was powerless to the food around me. Now im kind of excited. This is a place where I can show I'm better than others. I can prove that im more powerful than the candy. Every offer of food and then subsequent rejection of that food will be a display of my own self control.
Knowing I have this power makes me so much more motivated in my general eating habits. My "period" (i have an IUD so idk when it officially is, i just base off of moods, bloat and acne) was this past week, which is early. Because i wasn't expecting it, the number on the scale devastated me, but caused me to be very strict with myself this week. So i'm looking forward to monday, when i can weigh myself again.
[Discussion] Daily Food Diary! September 16, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Fri Sep 16 10:02:33 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/532lyq/daily_food_diary_september_16_2016/
---
This is a daily food diary thread for September 16, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
[Other] Oops I Did It Again
/u/zomboooo [5'7|115|18.1|-2|NB]
Created: Fri Sep 16 09:52:14 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/532k44/oops_i_did_it_again/
---
Oops. Walked into lab with a very strong will then I saw the donuts and caved.
This month and the first half of October have been and will be a little hard. My birthday is in two weeks and my mom comes to visit October 14.
I'm trying to be more flexible will eating and trying to allow myself relaxed days but man, it is hard. I keep staying around the 113 lbs range and that's pretty okay with me TBH for now.
I don't really know why I'm making this post. I guess I just wanted to get my thoughts down!
Edit: ALSO! after the weekend of October 14, I'm going to get MUCH stricter on me. If anyone wants to talk about this sort of thing or keep on each other, please message me! I want someone to talk to about this
[Goal] So! I finished my 10 day fast today and lost 7 pounds. I updated my weight in MFP and got this sweat notification.
/u/stephanynotstokes [5'5| too fat |-76 lbs | F]
Created: Fri Sep 16 09:14:20 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/532dg4/so_i_finished_my_10_day_fast_today_and_lost_7/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/e3468778b1b748c2afadd31c78aaa3d8?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=513e6975a1cd1aa692a6932cd5e3f3e0
[Help] Those of you recovering, what steps did you take to start thinking about food normally?
/u/canwefloat [5'5 | 112 | - 19 lbs | F]
Created: Fri Sep 16 06:54:34 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/531qnf/those_of_you_recovering_what_steps_did_you_take/
---
I'm not at a dangerously low weight. I'm not *the* skinny one. Some of my pants are getting tight. I have three rolls on my stomach when I bend over and my thighs are actually just huge (but for real, not in the body dismorphic way.)
I know all the statistics about dieting and weight shooting back up. I know I know I know. I know it all. I know exactly how many calories are in one grape and my BMR (which I subtract 200 from because I don't trust it) and what taking an EC stack twice a day every day feels like.
For some reason though, I never fully accepted I had an ED. I look too normal. Everything looks so so normal. I'm looking at a room full of normal people right now in fact, and can't convince myself any of them could ever have an ED. It just all seems okay.
Food torments me. I'm tired of it. I'm tired of being vegan and then switching to keto, and then being afraid of bread and if I have a bite of cake at my birthday. I feel like if I eat carbs I'm going to kill my body. I feel like if I eat candy I've lost control of my entire life.
I hate this feeling. I'm done. I'm done after six years. If I'm going to look normal, I just want to think normally too. Any tips appreciated
[Discussion] Does anyone else not trust diet drinks?
/u/kennedyconnolly [5'9| 120 | 17.4]
Created: Fri Sep 16 06:21:26 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/531lvi/does_anyone_else_not_trust_diet_drinks/
---
i know that coke zero and vitamin water zero have no calories but the ED part of me always thinks that they must be lying or tricking me somehow because i have associated good tasting things with calories.
[Discussion] Weekly Selfie, Progress Pic and OOTD Thread! September 16, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Fri Sep 16 06:03:11 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/531jd7/weekly_selfie_progress_pic_and_ootd_thread/
---
This is the weekly picture thread for September 16, 2016.
Feel free to share your selfies, progress pics or outfit-of-the-day (OOTD) pics in this thread!
**Rules**
1. Be nice, **or you will be banned.**
2. Please use [imgur](http://imgur.com/) as a host.
Consider adding commentary on featured brands, sizing, inspiration behind your OOTD (trying to look thin or cover up weightloss, etc.)!
**Remember that anyone can view the contents of this thread even if they are banned from this subreddit. If you receive unwanted messages, please contact the mods with a screenshot of the relevant messages. Note that even if we ban people, they can still message you, and they still have access to the contents of this subreddit. The best thing for you to do is to block them.**
*****
Selfie, progress pic and OOTD threads are posted every Friday.
Have any questions or concerns? Comment below, or [PM the mods.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FproED)
[Discussion] Grams or ounces? My serving sizes don't match!
/u/Space-Punk [5'11" | -31lbs | 20M]
Created: Fri Sep 16 05:15:18 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/531dt3/grams_or_ounces_my_serving_sizes_dont_match/
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Which is more accurate? I feel like grams would be. I have a cereal I like and it says the serving size is one cup or 236 grams but one cup is like 500 grams on my scale so I'm confused.
[Discussion] How do you stop triggers from triggering binges?
/u/AmAlreadyGoingToHell [H: 5"8 W: 129 GW: 110 F]
Created: Fri Sep 16 01:30:52 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/530t7h/how_do_you_stop_triggers_from_triggering_binges/
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Yesterday, a classmate tried to kiss me. I was raped two years ago and have had sex since, sorry if TMI. Somehow he reminded me of him, and I've been eating since then. I was on the right path with restricting ffs :(
How do you stop yourself?
[Rant/Rave] a long stupid rant which i need to say but is seriously not worth reading (its ugly)
/u/gin-and-lemon [🐝 5'1"| cw: 155lbs | bmi: 30 | -7lbs | f ]
Created: Fri Sep 16 00:53:56 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/530pnr/a_long_stupid_rant_which_i_need_to_say_but_is/
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i'm sad, i let myself eat too much, which means i have to either fast(which i suck at) or restrict even more to make up for the goals i've fucked up. i miss my boyfriend who is over 1300 km away, and i wonder if he would notice what i'm doing if he was here. i want to talk to him about things, but i dont want to worry him. he would worry. he knows things.
even though i've ate too much i'm proud because i haven't purged in the last 7 days, which has been a problem for the past two(+) years. i decided to get drunk, and i need to be awake in like 4 hours to go to a meeting to get a job. i constantly self sabotage. i've missed majority of my classes because i'm terrible at self control and the thought of being late makes me so anxious i want to curl up and never be found. and then missing class makes me so angry with myself. i try to punish myself with fasting, and i cant even fast properly, because i can never sleep when my fat ass is hungry.
i just want to go 48 hours without food. if i could do that, i could manage.
i literally cant do *anything* right.
I've lost 17 pounds and don't feel different
/u/meredith3313
Created: Fri Sep 16 00:32:18 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/530nhe/ive_lost_17_pounds_and_dont_feel_different/
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[removed]
[Thinspo] Thinspo through time?? (Vintage Thinspo from 1920's to 1999)
/u/mybfdoesntknowthis [5'3 | 140 | 25.49 | -16 lbs | F]
Created: Thu Sep 15 23:59:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/530k5y/thinspo_through_time_vintage_thinspo_from_1920s/
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http://imgur.com/a/yUrwG
[Other] Made myself a weight chart with rewards for goal weights! Not as pretty as some but I love it!
/u/Navelpudding [5' 6" | 185 | -65 | F]
Created: Thu Sep 15 23:39:37 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/530i4o/made_myself_a_weight_chart_with_rewards_for_goal/
---
https://i.redd.it/t9hthwl4utlx.jpg
[Rant/Rave] I wonder what it would be like..
/u/peanutbutteredbanana
Created: Thu Sep 15 22:55:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/530d32/i_wonder_what_it_would_be_like/
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I wonder what it would be like to be able to go one day without obsessing over my weight, calories consumed, my body, and control. It seems so crazy to me that people don't excessively track and weigh and portion their food at every meal and snack every day. I can't wrap my mind around the fact that people are okay with being a healthy, normal weight. But at the same time, I'm so fucking jealous. I want my life back but I know I'll end up back here every time. I fucking hate this ED, but I love it and I can't live without it. It's been a looong night and I'm so done with everything right now :(
[Help] Non-perishable safe foods?
/u/allquiets [5'1.5 | 138 | 26.68 | -6 | 85 | GNC]
Created: Thu Sep 15 22:47:05 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/530c5e/nonperishable_safe_foods/
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My family likes to snack on my food, and as a result I have to stockpile it in my room. Since I don't have a fridge, I'm limited to nonperishables (which, at the moment, means popcorn and sugar-free jello >_>)
I was wondering if you lovely folks had any suggestions!
[Rant/Rave] [Rant/Rave] Anyone feel like their confidence was destroyed going through a treatment centre?
/u/lifetc
Created: Thu Sep 15 21:40:39 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5303y5/rantrave_anyone_feel_like_their_confidence_was/
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Hey y'all,
I've seen a few of you talk about hospitals and stuff, hope this is OK to ask. I've had like a leg in recovery and a leg in anxiety / ED fear for a while now - less behaviours than before treatment, but still like full-volume endless panic about anything to do with food, without the escape route of being able to just stop eating. I kind of accepted the point the doctors were making that my life was pretty much destroyed by the ED, and if I wanted to have a job etc, I needed to change.
The problem was I kind of became fixated on how fucked up I was to end up in a hospital. Like, to the point where I schedule days around giving myself enough time to prepare a meal, because I'm convinced I'll fall apart if I don't take like 90 mins to prepare things slowly. And I've been afraid to work a more hardcore job (not just casual service work, used to work something way more high-level) for the same reason.
It feels like a lot of the psychology you get in a treatment centre is like they're saying "You need to let go of this thing that's really important to you, you can't keep going putting yourself through this." Which I'm willing to accept makes sense - that however being skinny happens, it's not optimal if you're consuming all your energy working at it 24/7. But I feel like I've shrugged off the behaviours but not the mindset, and now I'm just afraid of working too hard at anything in case it trigger a real relapse.
I pretty much hate the recovery mindset - almost everyone I know in recovery has become a person I don't want to be. **I hate that it felt like I couldn't talk about wanting to be successful (not just average) like that was an extension of wanting to look perfect (not just average).** But I can't be alone in also being terrified of one day being old and seeing that my whole life was spent disordered, right? I feel like I'm scared to try at anything because it might somehow lead back to the much worse feeling of dealing with active behaviours.
Ranting, venting - really don't want this to seem like an advocation of recovery or whatever (that's your own deal). Hard to know where to go with this stuff - therapists obviously not, friends from treatment are doing well and I don't want to knock them off course, and then who else is there? Thanks guys
[Rant/Rave] Small victories :)
/u/Oyapunn [5'8" | CW: 139.2 | GW:135 | UGW:125 |-8.8]
Created: Thu Sep 15 21:01:05 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52zylp/small_victories/
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After a week+ long binge episode, (triggered by school and life stress and period cravings :/) I've eased back into IF to work toward restricting again. I have a problem with eating everything that I have in front of me, so I'm trying to make it a goal to not eat everything on my plate.
The first day was hard and I had a ton of cravings through out the day, and ended up eating pretty badly in my hour time frame... Yesterday, the day went by great and I was able to throw away half of what I planned to be my only meal, but ended up giving into temptation and eating bread lol. And today! Breezed throughout the day no issue, and when my time to eat did come, I wasn't even hungry. I did start eating since I had it in my head that I WANTED to eat although I didn't need to (another thing that I need to work on), and I didn't finish my meal! More like I couldn't finish it; I ate slowly and didn't devour it on site, and I was surprised that I just did not want to eat anymore even though I only got to eat just a little. It was really yummy too so I wanted to keep eating, but it just did not appeal to me.
I know that's something most people wouldn't find remarkable. Wow so what you stopped eating when you got full. But this is a huge thing for me. Because of my relationship w food growing up, I've come to see eating in black and white: I can't eat at all because once I do I will not stop until everything is gone and I'm past the point that it's painful to eat.
So idk! To actually have my head tell me, "ok your done, you dont want to finish this" is incredible to me. I wanted to work to conditioning myself to go on 3 day fasts again, but if I can keep this mentality up then maybe I don't need to! I'm just very excited right now haha And since I actually feel full and satisfied, I don't even have any temptations! What a remarkable feeling lol :9
[Goal] 9 lbs down
/u/thelonelykitten_
Created: Thu Sep 15 20:30:34 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52zu95/9_lbs_down/
---
And 21 to go. I can do this. 9 lbs in just about a month isn't terrible but I know I can do better. I need to look beautiful and tiny for my anniversary with my bf.
[Help] My watch wristband is conspiring to drive me insane
/u/The_Marshmallow_Test [5'5 | CW-120lbs | GW-SkinnyArms&Cheekbones| F]
Created: Thu Sep 15 20:24:00 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52ztam/my_watch_wristband_is_conspiring_to_drive_me/
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Ok honest opinions here, this is such a stupid dumb as shit crazy ED thing to obsess over but I must know the truth!!
So I got
[this watch](http://i.imgur.com/W21sIq9.jpg)
at the end of May and I had the wristband fitted. I was a little heavier then, id estimate at about 130lbs based on photos (tbh I don't weigh myself at all because it's just a bummer 90% of the time, but I obsessively take photos and compare them with times when I knew my weight). I also think my flair is inaccurate rn and i'm probably a bit lower.
And then at the end of July it was about as lose on my wrist as it is in the photo. I tightened it so it fit. And now it's sooo lose again. But I just can't fathom that my wrists have gotten that much smaller?
Like to have to tighten it that much *twice*? So my theory is that the wristband fastener is sliding with time? But I can't move it when I try to push it so idk. Have any of you lost a ridiculous amount of fat in your wrists without losing a ridiculous amount in the rest of your body? I will say I've been a good girl restricting lately but I am still v. Dubious.. And am reluctant to take it as a win.
[Meme/Humor] Going for all time Monster Ultra + Adderall record like
/u/The_Marshmallow_Test [5'5 | CW-120lbs | GW-SkinnyArms&Cheekbones| F]
Created: Thu Sep 15 20:08:55 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52zr45/going_for_all_time_monster_ultra_adderall_record/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/1ea183eef9eb4877978bd9c88cbb0f0d?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=5f09c499ff9a4a5135b53b13c66f836a
[Rant/Rave] When you've flushed three times already but it still hasn't cleared, and ur bf will be home soon #justmiathings
/u/ratpoisonfurdinner
Created: Thu Sep 15 19:58:02 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52zply/when_youve_flushed_three_times_already_but_it/
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https://www.reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52zply/when_youve_flushed_three_times_already_but_it/
[Discussion] Do any of you suck on coffee beans?
/u/itsybitsyelephant [5'2 | CW 118 | GW 105]
Created: Thu Sep 15 19:30:36 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52zlr4/do_any_of_you_suck_on_coffee_beans/
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This idea just came to me and I feel like I'm having an epiphany. is there something I should totally know before doing this?
[Rant/Rave] Fuck cheese curds
/u/thirdocean
Created: Thu Sep 15 19:09:10 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52zijy/fuck_cheese_curds/
---
Are almost an entire package even though I only planned on have the diet pop. Over 600 calories. In the small. That's more than I've had today or yesterday. In one sitting. Threw up but I doubt I got it all. Like fuck I hate this. I want it out of me.
[Goal] I had 2500 calories today... And I don't feel terrible about it.
/u/kpatable [5'9" | 124.6 | 18.1/18.4 | -22.4 | F]
Created: Thu Sep 15 16:20:23 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52yrti/i_had_2500_calories_today_and_i_dont_feel/
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Atypical for this sub, yes, but I *am* happy about this. And like, I know one day of this won't ruin everything. I'm already down ~3 lbs from my flair, so things are getting back to normal. At *most* I will gain ~1/5 of a lb. At most. And, if I continue to lose as fast as I usually do, that will be back off in a couple days. So I'm 2 days behind. That's not bad!
[Other] Fasting helps me forget who i am - A love story (lol)
/u/cannibale101 [5'4 | HW:150smtg | CW: heh | GW:108 | 28F]
Created: Thu Sep 15 15:46:12 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52ylx9/fasting_helps_me_forget_who_i_am_a_love_story_lol/
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Initially written in French, my first language. I did my best to translate, it may come out a bit awkward (sorry).
À travers le jeûne et le surmenage, mon identité s'efface, s'oublie. La fatigue d'être si constamment, si incessamment soi semble s'estomper au profit d'une trop plaisante sortie de soi. Après tant d'années de trouble alimentaire, je garde désormais toujours en tête que ce sentiment n'est que temporaire ; c'est un répit, une oasis de paix dans une vie complète, longue, exténuante à être cruellement, irrémédiablement, moi. Merci, ED, de me laisser respirer à l'occasion.
***
Long fasts and excessive work make my identity fade away, help me unknow it. The tiredness of being so constantly, so incessantly oneself seems to vanish, replaced by a too blissful exit from oneself. After many years with ED, i now always know that this feeling is only temporary. It's a resting space, an oasis of peace in a whole, long, exhausting life of being cruelly, irredeemably me. Thank you ED for letting me breathe.
[Tip] Got any tips?
/u/sarahin1995
Created: Thu Sep 15 15:34:06 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52yjt7/got_any_tips/
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[removed]
[Discussion] Diet soda at restaurants
/u/TimberBarron [5'10" | 175 lbs| 25.1 | -10 lbs | M]
Created: Thu Sep 15 15:32:00 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52yjd9/diet_soda_at_restaurants/
---
I'm always worried they will fill it up with regular instead of diet. I honestly can't tell the difference between the two.
How do you tell the difference in taste? Viscosity?
[Rant/Rave] Welp. That didn't go well at all.
/u/honeytarte [5'5" | CW: 119 | GW: 105 | -25 |]
Created: Thu Sep 15 15:03:11 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52ye7d/welp_that_didnt_go_well_at_all/
---
I posted (like a week ago? A couple weeks? Honestly I don't know at this point) that I was leaving and trying recovery. And I tried recovery. I honestly did. I tried not counting calories and eating intuitively and it just turned into binging. I weighed myself today (after eating and drinking because I'm a masochist apparently) and I was 129, and I was at 119 like a week ago. (I'm sure a lot of it is food weight and water weight and whatnot, and hopefully at least part of it is muscle because I've still been going to yoga and doing bodyweight fitness and whatnot, but still it's agonizing.) So I have decided recovery is not for me.
I'm going to try alternate day fasting, while also making a sincere effort not to return to calorie counting (I get real obsessive real quick) and to just eat intuitively somehow and not binge. Even if I eat at maintenance or above maintenance by like 10-20%, fasting every other day will still make me lose weight and I won't feel deprived because I'll know if I want something I can have it tomorrow.
All I have to do is not binge. I can eat whatever I want, intuitively, every other day. I can eat above my TDEE by like 75% and I'll still lose weight (Just real slowly, which I'm okay with as long as it happens.)
I just keep telling myself, all I have to do is not binge. Let's see if this works.
[Rant/Rave] weird fantasies / rant
/u/bloodketosexmagic
Created: Thu Sep 15 14:58:13 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52yd9u/weird_fantasies_rant/
---
I am so obsessed with the idea of going off to like a boot camp or retreat for a few months and being forced to do activities and exercise and given like 500 calories a day and nothing else and just fucking disappear for a while and return to life a new person.
Like remember in Breaking Bad when Walter had to live in that cold cabin alone for ages and got so thin his wedding ring fell off? Its been years since ive seen that and still dream about being able to do that. Wtf
[Other] Deleting history
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Sep 15 14:42:52 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52yahf/deleting_history/
---
[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] "I'd never tell anyone about my ED, because they would think; well, why aren't you skinny then?"
/u/AmAlreadyGoingToHell [H: 5"8 W: 129 GW: 110 F]
Created: Thu Sep 15 14:33:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52y8mb/id_never_tell_anyone_about_my_ed_because_they/
---
It's just so accurate.
I've been around BMI 20 for ages now because I restrict and binge, a cycle that hasn't stopped for months. I feel like a joke, a fraud.
[Rant/Rave] I forgot how good it feels to not eat
/u/wavvvybaby
Created: Thu Sep 15 14:31:20 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52y8ac/i_forgot_how_good_it_feels_to_not_eat/
---
I've been dealing with EDs on and off since I was 10. Mainly by restricting/barely eating. I was so skinny last year but gained so much from not exercising and going from binge/purge to just binge.
But i started barely eating again. I'll have breakfast which is about 300-400 cals and wont eat until dinner which i then purge. I work during the day so I'm burning that off. I fill myself up with flavoured water and diet sodas.
But it feels so good to not eat. I have control over that one thing and it makes me feel powerful almost. It's weird now but I feel almost comfortable again.
Just thought I'd share.
[Tip] 11 Myths About Fasting and Meal Frequency
/u/smokesanddietcokes [Doesn't actually know what she's talking about.]
Created: Thu Sep 15 14:21:51 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52y6mp/11_myths_about_fasting_and_meal_frequency/
---
https://authoritynutrition.com/11-myths-fasting-and-meal-frequency/
[Help] Lower back hurts when i fast?
/u/cannibale101 [5'4 | HW:150smtg | CW: heh | GW:108 | 28F]
Created: Thu Sep 15 12:56:26 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52xqkr/lower_back_hurts_when_i_fast/
---
Does this ever happen to you? Do you know if it has anything to do with kidneys or if i just have a bad posture when i get too tired from the fast..?
(I know it's a terrible habit but when i fast i also tend to drink less water bc my mouth just kinda stops existing during that time. I drink maybe 1-2 coffees every 2 days and i EC stack regularly.) Any input would be greatly appreciated, thanks :)
Remember this!
/u/stephanynotstokes [5'5| too fat |-76 lbs | F]
Created: Thu Sep 15 12:48:00 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52xp27/remember_this/
---
https://i.reddituploads.com/16c6f022b45d457c8cc268a8459f83f8?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=3a4ad585abcb739a4f8ff12015cee648
[Discussion] Feeding the public // Working food service with an ED
/u/bloodyunderwear [5'4" | 113 | 19.4 | -7 | 20F]
Created: Thu Sep 15 12:41:36 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52xny3/feeding_the_public_working_food_service_with_an_ed/
---
I work in food service (campus cafe) for 6 hours on wednesdays as my college work study. 6 hours STRAIGHT. 6 hours of preparing food, touching food, making food for other people, surrounded. by. food.
I love it.
I'm going to make sure I fast 24 hours (including those 6 work hours) before the end of the shift, just so I can feel that incredible sense of control. I'm not THAT controlled though, so I'll let myself eat afterwards.
Anyone else in food prep here? Isn't it incredible to watch so much food go by and not feel like you HAVE to eat it??
[Rant/Rave] I don't feel like proED is aggressive enough anymore.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Sep 15 12:21:07 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52xkah/i_dont_feel_like_proed_is_aggressive_enough/
---
[deleted]
[Thinspo] Anyone watch Flesh and Bone? Just the intro itself is mega thinspo!
/u/Polyrrhic
Created: Thu Sep 15 12:14:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52xj2e/anyone_watch_flesh_and_bone_just_the_intro_itself/
---
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Waw8_NJ5W4A
[Thinspo] Some personal thinspo. TW: self harm scars
/u/Numbalternative3 [5'4 | 99.8 | 17.47 | -31lb | F]
Created: Thu Sep 15 11:46:41 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52xe5v/some_personal_thinspo_tw_self_harm_scars/
---
https://m.imgur.com/gallery/vyHUO
[Discussion] Does anyone else pay attention to their poop?
/u/123Purrr [5'8" | 123 | 18.5 | F/24]
Created: Thu Sep 15 11:30:18 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52xb6z/does_anyone_else_pay_attention_to_their_poop/
---
This is so gross and I'm okay being the only one that does this... Just I can't help but pay attention to bathroom trips. When I've been binging I poop atleast once a day and I hate it. The stools are disgusting and I feel dirty tied to such a human need.
Just when I'm in control I only do that once every couple of days and I love it. I know this all sounds gross so thank you to anyone who actually reads this ❤
[Discussion] Not seeing what's actually happening????
/u/acronym_acronym [5' 11" | 130 lbs | 18.1 | -15 lbs | Male]
Created: Thu Sep 15 10:46:07 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52x3ab/not_seeing_whats_actually_happening/
---
I was sure I hadn't made any progress in the last 6 months, I looked literally the same as far as I saw. I bought a women's xs hoodie and it fits, like wtf????? Does anyone else have weird moments of like realization that you're thinner than you are???
[Help] Am I just destined to forever be bloated?
/u/citrus_cunt [5' 9"| 139lbs | 19.5| +2lbs | F]
Created: Thu Sep 15 10:24:18 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52wzhx/am_i_just_destined_to_forever_be_bloated/
---
So I'm trying the warrior diet l, and so far so good. I'm only eating after 5:30 and I stop by 9:00. The only problem is I'm thinking that having one large meal is keeping me bloated and idk how to fix that?? It could just be my pre period bloatig (but im doubful) so I'm gonna keep at it for another week or so in good faith. But man oh man I am sick and tired of feeling like a balloon!!
[Discussion] Daily Food Diary! September 15, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Thu Sep 15 10:02:25 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52wvec/daily_food_diary_september_15_2016/
---
This is a daily food diary thread for September 15, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
[Rant/Rave] Too bad quitting smoking doesn't make you lose weight...
/u/Mi__ra [165cm |50 kg | 18.6 | 0 | F]
Created: Thu Sep 15 09:56:59 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52wuel/too_bad_quitting_smoking_doesnt_make_you_lose/
---
(so that I could write more about it here) but it doesn't make you magically gain it either. I'm trying to find support from a Finnish forum for people who quit smoking, and... Well, it would be allright otherwise, but the stuff the say about gaining weight. Apparently quitting "messes up your metabolism" so you can gain 20 kg apparently not doing anything to cause it, and you will absolutely gain at least 5 kg when quitting, it just happens. And it's impossible to lose that weight you gain during quitting.
Ok, I read that your metabolism does actually slow down a bit, but it's about 70 cal per day. That's 490 cal per week. Less than 500 calories per week doesn't make anyone gain 20 kg in three months.
Perhaps I just should skip the topics that are about weight - but now I am thinking that are they all talking bullshit about everything else too? I already know that I won't listen to their advice of eating something every time you crave a cigarette..
[Other] Queen. (apologies for post-quantity today btw.)
/u/eightstone [Height: 5ft 7 | CW: 9st 12lbs| BMI: 21 | Gender: F]
Created: Thu Sep 15 09:11:25 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52wm63/queen_apologies_for_postquantity_today_btw/
---
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FFOzayDpWoI
[Tip] My 150 calorie dinner (with fist for scale)
/u/MymlanOhlin
Created: Thu Sep 15 08:48:49 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52wi72/my_150_calorie_dinner_with_fist_for_scale/
---
http://imgur.com/YFr7rnd
[Discussion] Anyone take Vyvanse?
/u/TiredOfBeingFat_ [6'0"| CW251 |BMI34 | 22lost | GW130]
Created: Thu Sep 15 08:48:31 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52wi5j/anyone_take_vyvanse/
---
I had a script for adderall, but some stuff with my doctors office account went wrong and I never got it. So finally after a month they put me on Vyvanse. And I see that it's used to treat BED. Does anyone else any past experience with it?
I'd really like to hear from the males of this sub.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Sep 15 08:44:23 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52whh2/id_really_like_to_hear_from_the_males_of_this_sub/
---
[removed]
[Discussion] Is anyone else VERY worried about the Holidays?
/u/stephanynotstokes [5'5| too fat |-76 lbs | F]
Created: Thu Sep 15 08:43:05 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52wh8q/is_anyone_else_very_worried_about_the_holidays/
---
I know that the holidays are at least 2 months away but I eat so much that I almost make myself sick. First there's Thanksgiving and Thanksgiving left overs.
Then my mom cooks for Christmas and then I go to my boyfriends house for his family dinner then the day after Christmas we go to his grandparents house for a dinner. Then New Years dinners and parties.
I'm dreading it. That's why I'm trying to loose as much weight as possible between now and then.
[Discussion] Can we all share our journals?
/u/itsybitsyelephant [5'2 | CW 118 | GW 105]
Created: Thu Sep 15 08:42:35 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52wh60/can_we_all_share_our_journals/
---
I am absolutely in love with all of your journals and am seriously motivated to make my own! Care to share yours? I had a rough draft of one I'll post in the comments but I really want to see more!
[Meme/Humor] Just found my mother in my food cupboard touching, moving and reorganising my very specifically ordered foods...
/u/smokesanddietcokes [Doesn't actually know what she's talking about.]
Created: Thu Sep 15 08:40:53 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52wgw1/just_found_my_mother_in_my_food_cupboard_touching/
---
https://66.media.tumblr.com/ee9d4a5cf80e17faa7269ace9304e592/tumblr_n3h4veQboo1toamj8o4_500.gif
[Rant/Rave] my frustrating and self-imposed lack of a sex life
/u/eightstone [Height: 5ft 7 | CW: 9st 12lbs| BMI: 21 | Gender: F]
Created: Thu Sep 15 08:26:32 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52wefd/my_frustrating_and_selfimposed_lack_of_a_sex_life/
---
The last time I was in a relationship I weighed 8st 4lbs which I maintained easily due to the fear of allowing him to see me naked above that weight. I'm a whopping two stone heavier now, a year since the break-up. I still have feelings for him. I'm torn between wanting him back and wanting to move on. He still calls sometimes. He sends the odd message late at night. I bump into him occasionally. The truly ridiculous part of this whole charade is that while he and all of our friends think the decision to get back together rests with me, (secretly) I can't sleep with ANYONE at this weight. I tell people, him included, that I am still hurt about the break-up, that I need time to figure out what's good for me, and that seeing him, let alone being physically intimate with him, is still just too emotionally painful right now (not true, I love being around him, still). In reality, I just cannot let anyone see me naked while I'm over 9 and a half stone. Regardless of whether we should ultimately get back together, I hate that I can't make an autonomous decision about whether or not to be with a guy but am instead dictated by my fat. I hate that something as natural and healthy and normal and fun as dating is just off limits to me now. And that despite this I keep eating like a pig. It will take an age to shift a stone of weight, and that's how long until I can next get laid.
Not as artsy as some you lovelies, but I made one too!
/u/TopCat1392 [5'3.5" | FAT | GW:92.6 | F]
Created: Thu Sep 15 07:34:38 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52w5rr/not_as_artsy_as_some_you_lovelies_but_i_made_one/
---
http://imgur.com/C5gNSyD
[Rant/Rave] Set myself up for a bad day
/u/hazelconner [5'4" | 179.6 | 34.0% BF | -10.4 | X/F]
Created: Thu Sep 15 06:55:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52vzv6/set_myself_up_for_a_bad_day/
---
(On mobile. Help flair I guess)
So I knew I shouldn't get on the scale this morning. I have had a lot of sodium the last two days. I lifted yesterday so my muscles are retaining water.
And it's only a pound. But to see myself back sliding so early in the game is killing me.
Also we are having a work social event today and I know the catering is going to be amazing. I have two primatene with me to ward off hunger before and during the event. Plus I'm gonna do two workouts. (And I shouldn't get on the scale tomorrow because I have more strength training today) but I'm just so upset. And I feel silly for being upset.
[Discussion] still not sure if watching the machinist was a good idea..
/u/citrus_cunt [5' 9"| 139lbs | 19.5| +2lbs | F]
Created: Thu Sep 15 06:46:16 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52vyku/still_not_sure_if_watching_the_machinist_was_a/
---
on one hand its a fascinating, cerebral not-quite thriller with great acting and even better thinspo (christian bale is soooooo skinny im in love!!)
but on the other hand... its a creepy, suspenseful, not-quite thriller that is mildly violent? (the FrIdGE SCENE EW)
Anyway- who else has seen it and how did y'all like it?
[Thinspo] bit of thinspo
/u/eightstone [Height: 5ft 7 | CW: 9st 12lbs| BMI: 21 | Gender: F]
Created: Thu Sep 15 06:20:22 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52vv62/bit_of_thinspo/
---
http://imgur.com/gallery/wyUqh
[Discussion] Weekly Emotional Support September 15, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Thu Sep 15 06:02:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52vsuu/weekly_emotional_support_september_15_2016/
---
We're almost all dealing with quite stressful things outside of our eating disorders. Whether it be complicated relationships, friends, university, work or other mental illnesses like depression, anxiety or OCD, we all seem to be having a rougher time emotionally and mentally than the general population.
Use this thread to post about your problems or ask for advice concerning things other than EDs/ED behaviors.
**As always, follow the sub rules when reading or posting.**
*****
Weekly emotional well-being and support threads are posted every Thursday.
Have any questions or concerns? Comment below, or [PM the mods.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FproED)
[Other] I was craving sugary cereal. Was.
/u/eightstone [Height: 5ft 7 | CW: 9st 12lbs| BMI: 21 | Gender: F]
Created: Thu Sep 15 05:04:03 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52vm9a/i_was_craving_sugary_cereal_was/
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http://www.gll-getalife.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/fat-tony.jpg
[Tip] 46cal per 100g Cauli rice
/u/Fibreoptic_Calico
Created: Thu Sep 15 05:03:27 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52vm6u/46cal_per_100g_cauli_rice/
---
https://i.reddituploads.com/eda8230f14c9458f837409b659c0b380?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=6b022532fde63e6a847956ad30acbca2
[Discussion] Nuts?? (Sorry, no flair on phone)
/u/Cosmoflower [168cm | 152lbs| 24.43 | 19lbs | F]
Created: Thu Sep 15 04:35:41 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52vjff/nuts_sorry_no_flair_on_phone/
---
Hi hi hi
I was just wondering what everyone's opinions on nuts are. I really love cashew, almonds and pistachios on a salad but I get a bit anxious about having them because of their high calorie content. I tend to let myself have as many vegetables as I want, and can be slightly lenient with fruit, as my mind seems to think if it's whole and natural I don't need to worry about it. However I'm really on the fence with nuts. Any one have any opinions??
[Help] Please help motivate me to go to class :(
/u/Mrs-Schrute [5'9" | 117 lbs | 16.97 | -40 | 19F]
Created: Thu Sep 15 04:12:07 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52vh4d/please_help_motivate_me_to_go_to_class/
---
I have been having major issues with motivation due to my depression. I feel like total shit because I'm not losing fast enough anymore (which should be normal but to my fucked up brain it means I'm doing something wrong) and I keep comparing myself to the weight I was when I was 12 and first dealing with anorexia. Obviously I lost faster and got much smaller then, because I was younger and started at a higher weight and didn't have people breathing down my neck until after I went through recovery, because apparently it wasn't obvious back then but now everyone is so invested in my eating habits.
I feel way too fat to go to class, and way too overwhelmed. Luckily none of my professors take attendance but I know I need to go. For one, I'm paying money out the ass for this opportunity. For two, I really don't want to fail, and I do honestly enjoy the work.
I'm just way too upset lately to go and I need help to stop having so much self pity.
Edit: Thanks everyone. I know it sounds so trivial but I really needed this. I'm waiting for my last class of today right now and I really feel so much better
[Help] Does having a lactose intolerance mean you absorb fewer calories/nutrients? Could this be part of the reason I got really hungry and went binge-y?
/u/smokesanddietcokes [Doesn't actually know what she's talking about.]
Created: Thu Sep 15 03:55:39 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52vfm4/does_having_a_lactose_intolerance_mean_you_absorb/
---
I've posted briefly on here about this before, but I'm now considering whether it's played a bigger role in my health/behaviours than I thought.
I'm still pondering what triggered my binge episode, and after something that happened last night (after eating a bunch of low fat cottage cheese!) that I had been experiencing symptoms of lactose intolerance for a few weeks before the bingey weeks happened.
**TMI grossness**: Basically, every time I ate low fat dairy soft cheese products, I would get raging, watery, rush-to-the-loo diarrhoea within about an hour after eating, and recurrent episodes of diarrhoea afterwards for a while. Then I'd be constipated for a bit, but it would be triggered off again when I next ate dairy stuff.
Because I was a bit crazy at the time, I was basically ONLY eating low-fat cheese dairy products. I'd eat Wednesday and Friday, and only pots of low fat cottage cheese and quark. I'd experience it if I ate cottage cheese at the weekends too, but I had a more varied range of foods then. I did thismainly for the protein. Because of trying to cut cals, I had cut anything else out like tuna or quorn and was only eating these low fat cheese products..
I'm now wondering if only consuming those foods, paired with seemingly having developed a lactose intolerance (I havn't always been lactose intolerant, it's only been a thing for a few months now), contributed to me ending up feeling ravenous?
Any ideas? Thanks!
[Meme/Humor] Me, everyday for the past 6 weeks :-D (kill me)
/u/teasnob22 [5'3" | CW: 95.7 | GW: 88 | 17.43 | -22 | F | Vegan AF]
Created: Thu Sep 15 02:55:14 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52vacp/me_everyday_for_the_past_6_weeks_d_kill_me/
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https://i.redd.it/n03nih8mwilx.png
[Help] Help reduce bloating
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Sep 15 00:48:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52uzd9/help_reduce_bloating/
---
[deleted]
[Help] Help reducing bloating!
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Sep 15 00:37:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52uya6/help_reducing_bloating/
---
[deleted]
[Discussion] Coffee with milk or with sugar?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Sep 15 00:27:50 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52uxbo/coffee_with_milk_or_with_sugar/
---
[deleted]
[Other] 2nd Purge
/u/trapqueenB [5'4 | 134 lb | 23 | -30 lb | F/22]
Created: Wed Sep 14 23:50:01 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52uth7/2nd_purge/
---
My first purge was yesterday after a binge. Thought I would never do it again unless it was an emergency. Did it again today.
'm so surprised at how easy it is and I see why it's a thing. I threw out all of the food in the kitchen because I do not want this to become a habit.
[Discussion] What do you write in your journal?
/u/xtinytoadx [5'4" | 88 | 15.40 | F]
Created: Wed Sep 14 22:04:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52uhn6/what_do_you_write_in_your_journal/
---
I bought two beautiful journals the other day. Problem is, I don't know what to use them for or what to write in them. What suggestions do you have? What do you write in your journals?
[Rant/Rave] No dinner yay.
/u/iwillbesmall [5'6" | 129lbs | F | GW: 99]
Created: Wed Sep 14 21:52:11 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52ug1i/no_dinner_yay/
---
I made my SO dinner and when he asked if I wanted chopsticks I said no I'm not eating. He's didn't even really think twice about it it seemed. He's been with me all day and I've eaten nothing. I don't know what to think of this. On a note I'm happy on the other I'm like you don't even care I made you dinner and nothing for me ? I mean. I can be more obvious about restricting now i guess. The other day I didn't order anything at the restaurant because I didn't like any of the food and he knows I dont like the food in this country. I'll be able to purge less cuz I won't have to eat dinner anymore.it's the only meal I eat. I guess this is good. Just wish he would care I'm not eating lol. Maybe he wants me thinner ? When we met I was bigger and his ex was much bigger but I find him grabbing my hip bones and he put his hands around my ribs more. There's no point to this. I'm just rambling.
My boyfriend just beat me in the face repeatedly and tried to break my arms and I'm in another country and I'm scared to leave and scared to stay
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Sep 14 21:35:55 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52udzk/my_boyfriend_just_beat_me_in_the_face_repeatedly/
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[deleted]
[Help] Possibly TMI- periods??
/u/peanutbutteredbanana
Created: Wed Sep 14 21:34:11 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52udr1/possibly_tmi_periods/
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I haven't had my period for months and honestly it's starting to freak me out! Even when I was eating like 500 calories a day I would get my period, and now that I'm doing higher restriction I don't get it. I certainly don't miss it, but it scares me that it's gone and I always feel like it's going to start at the most inconvenient times lol. How many people here have lost their periods? /: and why do they even stop?
[Rant/Rave] When your fiancé/SO says they're cleaning he bathroom soon after an episode...
/u/isitjustme1984
Created: Wed Sep 14 21:13:43 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52uazt/when_your_fiancéso_says_theyre_cleaning_he/
---
Even though I know I always clean very well, I ALWAYS get anxiety when my fiancé says he's going to clean the bathroom. Anyone else?
Fortunately I don't b/p often and (almost) never purge when he's home so it's not a consistent issue.
[Rant/Rave] I hit 80 pounds lost today!
/u/notmyfirsttthrowaway [5'9.5 | 172lbs | 24.33 | -80 | F]
Created: Wed Sep 14 20:43:38 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52u6w1/i_hit_80_pounds_lost_today/
---
I got the great idea to use my 50% off coupon for pizza and ended up binging. Good thing the soda was half off!
[Discussion] How many times per day do you eat?
/u/c_marier [5'6"| 112 | 18.1 | -13 | 22F]
Created: Wed Sep 14 20:35:33 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52u5q6/how_many_times_per_day_do_you_eat/
---
Just curious about typical habits. I just started skipping breakfast and lunch and limiting myself to calories at dinner only. I usually can't eat much because my stomach has shrunk, plus I get cramps for hours afterwards, which I love. Kinda a punishment for eating idk. I'm hoping this will make a difference, since I doubt I'm even capable of eating more than 500-700 in one sitting. We'll see how it goes...
[Intro] [Intro] Hello everyone!
/u/NotSoSlimJim_ [6'5" | 254.6 lbs | 28.06 | - 6.2 | 24M]
Created: Wed Sep 14 20:34:23 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52u5ke/intro_hello_everyone/
---
Hi, /r/proED! I guess I'm in the minority of dudes here, but I've been lurking for awhile, and this community seems pretty cool :) You can call me Jim.
I was a bulimic, starting around the age of fourteen. From binging, I ballooned up to 180ish (I was shorter at the time), and my parents sent me to inpatient after I passed out at school, which led to them finding out.
After getting out of inpatient, they kept a close eye on me for a while. My parents stopped keeping unhealthy food in the house, so I could loose a few more pounds from my binging. This lead to my anorexia around the age of 18. I was only an inch shorter at that point.
From restricting, I lost 40 pounds over the summer before going to college. (I was 200 pounds at my lowest point). At college, I relaxed too much and gained 100+ pounds over all those years.
I dropped out of college and started running to loose weight a year ago. I worked as a warehouse at the time, and as I started to drop back into the rhythm of restricting, the physical work became too hard.
In April, my dad died from heart failure, and I dropped into a deep period of depression. I gained about thirty pounds, reaching 270 pounds before realizing I needed to change. A few months ago, I started loosing weight the healthy way. In the middle of August, I tried out fasting, and I guess it brought me back to here.
Right now, I live with my mom and work at a hardware store, as well as a night shift as a security guard at a little place near my house. I'm saving up to return to college, most likely as a literature major. The rest of my money is spent on various low-cal products.
Anyways, I'm glad to be here with you guys!
My GW right now is to get to 200 pounds.
I'm thinking my UGW is around 160-170, though I haven't decided yet :)
Right now, my eating plan goes something like this:
- Very low-cal protein shake for breakfast (50-200 calories, depending on the day)
- Lunch is a wrap or a sandwhich (200-500 usually), with a Diet Coke and a small salad (20-100, depending on toppings and stuff)
- Dinner is my meal that varies... I like eating low-cal noodle dishes. Usually the meal is about 500, depending on my other two meals
- For snacks, I usually have some sort of energy drink in the afternoon, before I go to my second job. Sometimes, if we're moving boxes or something at the hardware store, I'll eat a Luna bar... I know they're meant for women, but the lemon flavor is so goddamn good!
Anyways, sorry for rambling on... I'm a very talkative person IRL.
Few things to note. One, I'm asexual and aromantic. Two, I have ADHD, but no insurance, so I don't have any treatment for it. Three, my weight is NOT from muscle. It's all fat. I'm a flabby whale :) Four - I do not own a phone, just a small reading tablet and a laptop. I'd like to buy a phone but I'm pretty broke right now with all my saving and whatnot.
Just thought I'd post this here :) See you guys around!
[Help] How do I deal with intrusive thoughts?
/u/gazdaman1 [6'0" 18y/old | 153lb | 20.8 | -30lb | M]
Created: Wed Sep 14 20:26:15 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52u4f4/how_do_i_deal_with_intrusive_thoughts/
---
Everyday, from the time that I wake up to the time that I go to bed, a battle rages in my mind. I want to be thin, so desperately want to be thin. My thoughts are filled with what I could be: the happy, thin, sociable person that I was once.
But everyday, another part of my mind fights and screams, yelling at the top of it's lungs, telling me to eat. It occupies my thoughts 24/7, convincing me one way or another to eat. It reasons and negotiates with me telling me that "You haven't eaten anything all day, you should eat", "You'll focus better if you grab a snack", "You've eaten healthy all week, you deserve a treat.". Everyday, I end up scumming to it's wishes, and I find myself on autopilot, gorging on whatever sugary or fatty foods I can get my hands on.
These two thoughts fight each other everyday, leaving me physically and emotionally exhausted. I go to bed with guilty thoughts about what I've eaten and I wake up, exhausted, preparing myself for today's battle with my mind. I can't stop these intrusive thoughts that race through my mind, and everyday I get weaker. It's wearing me down, getting in the way of my classes, destroying my social life, leaving me a hollow shell of the person I once was.
I need help quelling these intrusive and self destructing thoughts. I can't go to my family or my friends; this sub is my only resource. I'm lonely, fighting an equally lonely battle. I need help before it completely overtakes me.
[Help] Well my TDE is like 2,000 something. And today was a relatively good food day with "micro binges" better than like the 3,000 cal binges I've been having. Why do I still feel like I messed today up so bad? I should be happy I didn't actually binge as bad as usual.
/u/TiredOfBeingFat_ [6'0"| CW251 |BMI34 | 22lost | GW130]
Created: Wed Sep 14 20:20:51 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52u3on/well_my_tde_is_like_2000_something_and_today_was/
---
http://imgur.com/a/hjZUz
[Discussion] [Discussion] Low cal snacks?
/u/idkjust [5'9" | 130.6lbs | 19.29 | -15 | F]
Created: Wed Sep 14 19:46:18 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52tyoa/discussion_low_cal_snacks/
---
I'm going to a traditional girl sleepover on Saturday, and the host has taken a list of different snacks we want to have. I don't want to draw attention to myself by not eating, and I know that if I don't bring a healthy alternative, I'll eat the shit out of some brownies.
So what're your favorite low calorie snacks?
[Help] How is Walden Farms Zero Cals?
/u/deanhipchester [5' | 115.2 lbs | 23.69 | -27.4 lbs | F]
Created: Wed Sep 14 19:29:27 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52tw4n/how_is_walden_farms_zero_cals/
---
Like the title says, how is Walden Farms zero calories? Even on their Canadian site it says zero cals and I know in Canada you have to write however many cals is in something (eg. Monster Rehab is written as 0 cals in the states but 10 cals here & all my gum packages say 1-5 cals)
[Rant/Rave] Just feeling defeated
/u/morose_adipose [5'2 | 90lbs | 17.05% | F]
Created: Wed Sep 14 18:58:51 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52trlu/just_feeling_defeated/
---
Logically, I *know* eating 700 calories a day is not "pigging out" but mentally, I am kicking myself for eating that much. I've been so tired and weak lately, and almost blacked out while driving on the highway this weekend, so I've been trying to make myself increase my calories a bit. And I'm hating it. I feel like I've put on weight from one day to the next, even though the scale has stayed the same.
I'm just really tired and it's making me depressed. Sometimes I really hate this disorder. Sometimes I think it'd be nice to think about something else besides food, and calories, and hunger, and how I feel like shit. But then I remember that I hate feeling anything at all, or thinking about feelings and I feel comforted by having this disorder to keep my mind occupied.
I'm just a mess right now. My mind is all over the place. I have no one to talk to about any of this. Sorry for rambling, but if I didn't get this out I was going to end up eating a gallon of ice cream or something equally stupid which would only make things worse, lol.
[Rant/Rave] With BED, every night is a psychological hell.
/u/kpatable [5'9" | 124.6 | 18.1/18.4 | -22.4 | F]
Created: Wed Sep 14 18:19:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52tlpz/with_bed_every_night_is_a_psychological_hell/
---
After dinner, all I want to do is eat. I'm not even restricting. I just want to eat and binge. But I can't. Because then I'd get fat and unhealthy and disgusting. Plus, reinforcing the urge to binge just makes it worse. This lasts literally until I fall asleep. So for hours. Every fucking night. It's
**SO**
**EXHAUSTING**
*sigh*
I hate this. I want it to stop. I want to be able to relax at night. But I never can. Not anymore.
I feel like crying.
[Discussion] Does anyone else just never wear jeans?
/u/zomboooo [5'7|115|18.1|-2|NB]
Created: Wed Sep 14 18:15:29 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52tl4t/does_anyone_else_just_never_wear_jeans/
---
I don't know why, but I honestly find that jeans really trigger my BDD more than any other article of clothing. To the point where I can't wear them if I'm unhappy with the tag size or if they feel too tight on my belly. I haven't worn high waisted jeans in so long due to this fact.
Is anyone else dealing with this?
[Intro] Intro
/u/zarnaah [5'5 | 163 | 27.44 | -22lbs | female]
Created: Wed Sep 14 18:05:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52tjmo/intro/
---
Hey guys! I've been browsing this sub for quite a while and really like the sense of community y'all have going on here, and figured I'd ought to introduce myself.
I'm 16, from Seattle, and have been..iffy? With food for a while. Like I was fat as a kid got skinny for two years bc my mom was obsessed with my body then gained it all back. I wouldn't consider myself to have a full blown ED, but I definitely know my 'good' days aren't considered healthy.
I think my biggest issue is adapting to change. Like, July and August were pretty empty for me so I was able to restrict a lot and lost 17lbs (8 of which I've gained back since school started) and whenever my plans change last minute or things are out of my control, I start binging. Binging for days sometimes even a couple of weeks. Does anyone else here have that issue? If so, how do you snap out of it?
P.S. Sorry for no flair! Posting on mobile.
[Rant/Rave] Shouldn't this be pleasant?
/u/SkinnyisSexy [5'7.6 |128.4|gw115|19.6| F]
Created: Wed Sep 14 17:41:34 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52tg1d/shouldnt_this_be_pleasant/
---
Heads up my flair is out of date, I gained a lot of weight on account of me either compulsively eating or not eating. I am 140 and about 5'7-5'8. Right now everything fits too tight and jigges and touches more and I hate myself for it. So, an acquaintance of mine was giving me a hug goodbye and commented "Oh, woe. You're so tiny." It actually both hurt, and offended me. I am not tiny, I was 123 and gained 20lbs, I am not tiny. I was not tiny at 123. I am chubby now. I am fasting my way back down so I can show him what tiny is.
[Discussion] The more I learn about nutrition the more I suspect other people of having EDs
/u/pungentthrowaway [5'1" | CW: 154 | -13 | F]
Created: Wed Sep 14 17:12:10 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52tbfg/the_more_i_learn_about_nutrition_the_more_i/
---
Is this the case for anyone else? Learning about CICO (calories in, calories out) makes me wonder about the skinny girls I see. Unlearning misinformation (fat logic I guess although I'm not fond of that term) about some people just having super human metabolisms or genetic "set weight" being a thing is making me skeptical as hell that all these thin people around me aren't disordered.
I've also developed my ED pretty late in life/recently so maybe it's just like one of those things where you buy a car and suddenly it seems like you see that same model of car everywhere? I never used to suspect people of having EDs and now I'm like even looking back at thin people I've known in the past and wondering if they had all that going on without me ever knowing anything. I think my brain is just too fucked up to understand how anyone could not be overly concerned with diet/exercise and still be very thin.
[Tip] 5 Small Ways to Support Someone with an Eating Disorder
/u/Trin5856
Created: Wed Sep 14 16:22:32 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52t3pf/5_small_ways_to_support_someone_with_an_eating/
---
http://www.connectwithlife.com/wellness/ways-support-someone-eating-disorder/
[Discussion] Anyone else feels unsatisfiable hunger?
/u/Vanilla_Mieux [5'1 | GW: 65 | F]
Created: Wed Sep 14 16:13:26 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52t2c7/anyone_else_feels_unsatisfiable_hunger/
---
I have food. I have food I like eating. I ate some of it. I purged. But I am still hungry???? But the more I think about it the more I realize that I'm not hungry for food but something else and I don't know what it is, and all this time I've been trying to compensate for it with food.
Ugh. I'm so tired of being bad at something that's supposed to be a normal and needed thing to do.
[Discussion] wish I had the capacity to find unhealthy food disgusting
/u/crapbeg
Created: Wed Sep 14 15:28:50 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52suoj/wish_i_had_the_capacity_to_find_unhealthy_food/
---
I love food so much. I'm actually ashamed to admit how much I love food. It's gross.
I really wish I could find ridiculous recipes disgusting. Even recipes which use straight up lard? Nah, I'd still want to eat it.
Anyone else have this problem? :(
[Help] [Help] Why am I failing so badly?
/u/Im_A_Whale_AMA [5'3.5" | 103.8 lbs | 18.53 | ¯\_(ツ)_/¯]
Created: Wed Sep 14 15:28:47 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52suo4/help_why_am_i_failing_so_badly/
---
For the last week or so, I've been great at restricting through out the day. I can make it through the afternoon. I'm usually busy 6-8, so I don't eat then either.
Oh boy, but when I get home after whatever I'm doing in the evening, mt self control melts... I eat and eat and eat. It ranges from 3000-calorie bings to less than a 1000.
It rucking sucks, because I waste so much energy planning out what I'll est, and I make it most of the day. But the two-three hours when I get to relax just go all wrong and ruin my day.
Any advice?
Sorry for bad grammar. I'm on mobile.
[Thinspo] This youtuber is such amazing thinspo.
/u/minamasood [5'6.5"| hopeless| 22F]
Created: Wed Sep 14 15:25:32 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52su40/this_youtuber_is_such_amazing_thinspo/
---
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCeZn7qRN3JKVcEYK_dDg7JQ
[Goal] My body last november :(
/u/CoconutTime
Created: Wed Sep 14 14:57:17 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52sowz/my_body_last_november/
---
http://imgur.com/a/wQi8G
[Rant/Rave] Perfectionist tendencies will be my downfall.
/u/Alexa1p [5'5'' | 110 | 18 | -10.7 | F]
Created: Wed Sep 14 13:30:00 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52s91w/perfectionist_tendencies_will_be_my_downfall/
---
So I was close to my goal weight: http://imgur.com/a/KHz3m
Then my doctor told me I'd get osteoporosis at forty, and I freaked out. On top of stumbling across this: http://imgur.com/Q6jni9S
So I decided I could gain a little weight healthily and still look amazing. I've gained five pounds in a little over a week (I've been strength training too, and a lot of that is /probably/ water weight), but I'm so freaked out about how fat I feel I'm going to cut to 1000 calories while continuing to strength train so I hopefully don't lose my muscles.
When I'm back down to 108 I'll try to increase the calories I'm eating per day, but I'll only eat 200 over maintenance instead of binging like a fucking pig and eating 800+ over.
;_; I am theoretically okay with weighing more if it's all muscle, but I'm not sure I'm mentally stable enough to gain weight without feeling like shit.
[Help] Potassium?
/u/lilmissdisappearing [5'3" | 111 | 19.66 | *not enough* | F]
Created: Wed Sep 14 13:08:04 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52s4zu/potassium/
---
How do you get potassium? I eat a lot of spinach, apples, and bananas (and take a supplement when I can) but I always come up SO short!
[Rant/Rave] It's been almost 2 months of binging
/u/lightfeathers [5'4" | CW 114 | GW 95 | F]
Created: Wed Sep 14 12:56:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52s2rx/its_been_almost_2_months_of_binging/
---
I'm going insane. I even stopped going to school because I'm so ashamed of myself and how I look. I don't know what's wrong with me.
To anyone who's going through what I'm going through right now, I wish you the best of luck!
[Rant/Rave] "How small are you now?"
/u/supersizetrainwreck [5'9 | CW 125lb | 18.13 | F]
Created: Wed Sep 14 12:15:45 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52rv6u/how_small_are_you_now/
---
That's what my coworker just said to me, and I think my reaction gave me away :/ He's someone I've been close with but haven't told about any of this. Anyway my clothes are all a little big so most of my stuff is at least a little baggy, but today I'm wearing a shirt that was way too small before so it really shows how much weight I've lost. As soon as I said "yea I'm working on it" he was like, "No not in a weird way or anything, you look good!" But meanwhile I had that fight with my bf last night/this morning so while I want to feel good about it I kind of had mixed feelings. I mean I'm glad someone's noticing and that they think I look good, I just don't want anyone at work to know what's going on.
[Goal] Ativan: dinner of champions.
/u/finch_love [5'6" | 165.8 | 26.73 | -54.4 | F]
Created: Wed Sep 14 11:55:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52rrp3/ativan_dinner_of_champions/
---
My parents are super religious and I am not. They are relentless in their attempts to "bring me back to God" and last night was just another episode of me making excuses as to why my son can't go to church with them. They didn't used to be this way and our relationship was actually really great but then they joined this cult-like church and they're not the same. They're like different people. I can't have a conversation with them without them bringing in religion. I always wanted to please my parents as a kid and that rolled over into adulthood so seeing my parents disappointed fucking kills me. They came over last night and I rejected their request for them to take my toddler to church with them every Wednesday night for Awanas and my dad just stopped talking to me and looking at me. Didn't say another word until I said goodbye and that I love him. We used to be so close and now this is how it is. It really hurts me. Ordinarily I would take this opportunity to say FUCK IT and eat whatever the fuck I want but I was determined not to do that this time. So into the house I went with my son and I popped a couple Ativan because fuck that shit- I'm not going to let the anxiety my parents give me dictate my progress. I'm in a really good place right now and I don't want to fuck this up. So pats on the back for me for not putting shit in my mouth and instead popping those pills. Plus I slept like a rock last night and it was amazing 👍👍👍
[Discussion] How do you deal with hair loss?
/u/daeboo [5ft/88lbs/-15]
Created: Wed Sep 14 11:44:23 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52rpm7/how_do_you_deal_with_hair_loss/
---
I have pretty thin hair already and diet has just made it worse.
How do you guys deal with hair loss...any supplements you take or specific foods that help out?
Help Me With My Plan?
/u/throwaway_cantstop
Created: Wed Sep 14 11:24:19 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52rlv7/help_me_with_my_plan/
---
[removed]
[Goal] Looking for more members in a Facebook group (no flair, on mobile)
/u/bellasrose
Created: Wed Sep 14 11:16:43 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52rkex/looking_for_more_members_in_a_facebook_group_no/
---
I have a secret Facebook group and it's fairly active but there is hardly anyone in it and I feel it would be better with more people. It's a weight loss accountability group, but people with all Eds are welcome as there is no right way to have one. It's also just a place to vent or post thinspo. I like using reddit, but it's nice to have something on facebook as well since I check it way more iften, if you're interested let me know and I'll send you the info for my fake fb profile so you don't have to send me your info and I'll add you to the group, you can then unfriend me if you would like. If this isn't allowed please just delete, don't ban me
[Intro] intro
/u/lilmissdisappearing [5'3" | 111 | 19.66 | *not enough* | F]
Created: Wed Sep 14 11:12:41 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52rjq0/intro/
---
hi!
The usual longtime lurker, first time poster shtick. I finally sent enough PMs explaining I couldn't comment with my account in this sub that I figured I'd just make a proED throwaway. Guess I can post too now!
I am 21, 5'3" and about 118lbs. GW is 100 even, but I'm sure that'll change by the time I get there. Currently restricting at around 500-700 calories a day. I live with my sister and BIL and my boyfriend, it is a minefield.
I started restricting in middle school, started to B/P in high school, and shipped off to college thinking I was miraculously "all better" without ever getting treatment. It is my senior year, I'm on a semester off at home. I feel gigantic and I'm not eating. My mental health is a wreck otherwise and it's straining all of my relationships. Things are obviously trash.
This subreddit has been a godsend. Thanks to each and every one of you for being here. Happy to join your ranks officially.
[Tip] 190 Cal French toast (3 peices)
/u/Nude-prude [5"6.5 | 103.4 lbls | 16.42|-40| female]
Created: Wed Sep 14 10:45:52 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52rewp/190_cal_french_toast_3_peices/
---
http://imgur.com/rRjmMAi
[Help] How do you stop binging?
/u/123Purrr [5'8" | 123 | 18.5 | F/24]
Created: Wed Sep 14 10:43:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52ref8/how_do_you_stop_binging/
---
Food is terrifying but I can't help but stuff my face when it's infront of me. Feeling full is the worst feeling ever so it feels right to punish myself with it.
My stats are so wrong but I've been too scared to weigh in. I want to go to the gym but why waste my money when it's tight and I have no will power. What the hell can I do? Today was supposed to be a fast but I'm already at 498. Those calories were supposed to go to booze so I could strip and not focus on my body 😟
**Update:** Thank you everyone for the support and comfort. I was able to avoid another massive food binge yesterday. I'm still scared... Just I finally woke up hungry this morning. It's a sick comfort but still nice all the same. Thank you all for caring when I was too scared to turn to anyone else.
[Other] Breakfast and lunch
/u/DeadliestSnatch_
Created: Wed Sep 14 10:31:16 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52rcbd/breakfast_and_lunch/
---
http://imgur.com/525NRSn
[Help] What are your go to Keto snacks?
/u/itsybitsyelephant [5'2 | CW 118 | GW 105]
Created: Wed Sep 14 10:20:28 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52raeo/what_are_your_go_to_keto_snacks/
---
I don't like eating meals (only snacks) so I'm looking for some that are relatively low calorie (I know it's hard with Keto but it keeps me sane).
So far I have seaweed (30 kcal 10 slices), pork rinds (14 grams 160 kcal), low calorie cheese (35 kcal I think), pickles, olives (15kcal for 2). What else do you suggest?
[Discussion] Daily Food Diary! September 14, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Wed Sep 14 10:02:45 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52r74b/daily_food_diary_september_14_2016/
---
This is a daily food diary thread for September 14, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
[Discussion] What is your CW and GW?
/u/itsybitsyelephant [5'2 | CW 118 | GW 105]
Created: Wed Sep 14 09:47:22 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52r4f7/what_is_your_cw_and_gw/
---
Wanting to see the variety of the sub especially with GW :)
[Help] just discovered the 20/4 fast, is it okay to do every weekday?
/u/tinybites [5'6" | sw: 185 | cw: 159.5 | gw: 115]
Created: Wed Sep 14 09:13:28 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52qy9j/just_discovered_the_204_fast_is_it_okay_to_do/
---
i have a desk job where i work 7:30-4:30. i'm never hungry for breakfast after waking up to early, and by lunch time after my morning coffee i'm still not very hungry. would it be healthy to do a 20/4 fast on weekdays? i'm new to fasting and have no idea what i'm doing.
[Discussion] Just made a "Peach" account and I love it so much!
/u/stephanynotstokes [5'5| too fat |-76 lbs | F]
Created: Wed Sep 14 09:05:03 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52qwrj/just_made_a_peach_account_and_i_love_it_so_much/
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[removed]
[Rant/Rave] I feel so disgusting lately.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Sep 14 08:29:38 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52qqq8/i_feel_so_disgusting_lately/
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[deleted]
[Meme/Humor] Made the mistake of telling my future brother in law's my goal weight...
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Sep 14 08:01:49 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52qm24/made_the_mistake_of_telling_my_future_brother_in/
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[deleted]
[Help] Do any of you have a safe food at Red Robin ;-;
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Sep 14 07:32:31 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52qhe5/do_any_of_you_have_a_safe_food_at_red_robin/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] My Body is Protesting
/u/NeverThinEnough [5'4.5" | 98.8 | 16.7 | -29.2 | F]
Created: Wed Sep 14 07:26:53 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52qggv/my_body_is_protesting/
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I'm so frustrated right now. I got up early to go to the gym this morning. I felt dizzy all day yesterday so I should have known this was coming, but I fainted and had a seizure within five minutes of being out of bed. So I thought that right then would be an awful time to go to the gym, and I went back to sleep. I woke up an hour later to try again. I was only wanting to go on a brisk walk to enjoy the new cooler weather, but I almost fainted again.
I'm in bed now, and I really do not want to eat because I haven't burned any calories for the day yet. I really need to get over this mental thing and just put some nourishment in my body but I don't know if I can. I mean, I know I'll burn those calories later in the day but I just hate being in "calorie debt" so I usually don't even try to eat until late afternoon. Does anyone else think this way? I realize it's extremely irrational but I can't get over it.
Ug sorry for the rant. I'm just so mad at my body right now.
[Help] Low cal sore throat remedies?
/u/heartbrokenandok [5'7"-ish | 198.4 | 31-ish | -23.4 | F]
Created: Wed Sep 14 07:21:04 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52qfib/low_cal_sore_throat_remedies/
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I woke up this morning with a sore throat and really want to make sure it doesn't get any worse. In the past I would be all over the cough drops and tea with honey. Right now I can't stop thinking about how many calories would be in all those. Its 50 cal per tbsp of honey, and cough drops are basically all sugar.
Any suggestions would be really appreciated. Thanks!
First EC Stack
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Sep 14 07:12:22 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52qe52/first_ec_stack/
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[deleted]
[Help] Am I just being unrealistically impatient?
/u/citrus_cunt [5' 9"| 139lbs | 19.5| +2lbs | F]
Created: Wed Sep 14 07:02:01 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52qcjs/am_i_just_being_unrealistically_impatient/
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So I've finally settled on a diet I can comfortably live with. I fast all day until 5:30pm-7:00pm and then I eat ~700-800kcal. I workout on an empty stomach 4 out of 7 mornings, and I only binge on Saturday nights.
I've done this for an entire week and was feeling really good about myself!
.....and then I stepped on the scale. How the FUCK did I gain back 5 lbs?!? How am I at 140 again???
Am I just being unrealistic? Should I just keep on with this diet for another week to see if it works or should I abandon ship right now and start doing something that's better for my metabolism?
(The big problem is this diet is the only way I can control my eating impulses at night. I can't not eat at bedtime so I just stockpile calories till then, I know it's terrible for my metabolism... but I'm afraid to try a new plan and then binge from that..)
EDIT:: Also this weekend im going to a concert with my bff and binge-drinking/eating will be happening- no question about it. But I'm *terrified* of coming back and weighing myself afterwards! That's why I want to lose as much weight (even if it's water weight) as I can in 3 days so I feel like it's safe to see the scale go up. (Does that make sense?) Because I've been promising myself since I finally went below 140 that if I ever got above 140 again I would kill myself. And I don't think I'll be able to stop myself.
[Discussion] Way To Go Wednesday September 14, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Wed Sep 14 06:02:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52q43l/way_to_go_wednesday_september_14_2016/
---
This is the weekly achievement thread for September 14, 2016.
This weekly thread is to spotlight those achievements you feel don't necessarily warrant their own post, but you'd like to celebrate all the same. This is not limited to specifically ED-related goals; share anything you are happy about having done or accomplished recently!
*****
Achievement threads are posted every Wednesday.
Have any questions or concerns? Comment below, or [PM the mods.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FproED)
[Rant/Rave] I found an old picture of myself at my LW. I want to cry.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Sep 14 05:59:50 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52q3og/i_found_an_old_picture_of_myself_at_my_lw_i_want/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] ..Is it possible to still be retaining extra water weight even after 3 days of no binging (and restricting), following a multi-week binge fest?
/u/smokesanddietcokes [Doesn't actually know what she's talking about.]
Created: Wed Sep 14 05:52:03 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52q2rl/is_it_possible_to_still_be_retaining_extra_water/
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Because I just measured my waist.. 28 inches. I want to break down and cry. I want a <24 inch waist, but was okay-ish bouncing between 25-26..
But 28.. dude.
I did have some cottage cheese last night so maybe a bit bloated too, I can get bloated from dairy.. but I don't feel bloated..
And tbh I don't feel particularly water weighty any more either..
I feel entirely normal tbh, in a normal state.
Oh god what if it's real.
God fuck jesus shit. Shit jesus fucknugget. 28 inches.. it does NOT look good on me. I'm only 5ft tall with a tiny frame and also it is not good.
[Fuck](http://i.imgur.com/TmlfI.gif).
[Rant/Rave] Holiday - freaking out!
/u/thin_is_in [5'8 | 115lbs | 17.3 | -35lbs | F]
Created: Wed Sep 14 03:04:48 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52plw2/holiday_freaking_out/
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So I'm off with the girls for a couple of nights away from tomorrow. It'll be lovely to relax and get some sun, but omg I'm freaking out. Bikinis and cocktails and buffets oh my! Also no Internet, so I can't even catch up with all of you lovelies who always make me feel so much calmer about these things!
Sorry about the rant, there's just no-one else who would understand why I'm freaking out about 4 days in the sun!
[Goal] My mum got this from her GP friend. I'm planning on reducing it to ~850kcal
/u/Rikicarvu [5'8" | 109.2lbs | 16.36 | -20lbs | F]
Created: Wed Sep 14 02:46:37 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52pkeo/my_mum_got_this_from_her_gp_friend_im_planning_on/
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https://i.redd.it/smjoxrdnhglx.jpg
[Goal] Lunch of champions. 1st day of my coffee/water fast done.
/u/SkinnyisSexy [5'7.6 |128.4|gw115|19.6| F]
Created: Wed Sep 14 02:22:52 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52pieo/lunch_of_champions_1st_day_of_my_coffeewater_fast/
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http://imgur.com/JxftdTM
[Intro] Intro
/u/fluorescentpig
Created: Wed Sep 14 02:04:00 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52pgqw/intro/
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Hey everyone! I thought it would be time to properly introduce myself after leaving some comments here and there. I'm 21, Dutch (from the Netherlands/Holland) and just finished my bachelor thesis and got my degree, yay.
Looking back, I've always struggled with binging and disordered thoughts like "I have to eat this immediately, or it will be gone", which makes no sense because my parents always had plenty of healthy food around, just never any candy or junk food. So if I was at a friends house, or baby sitting, I would eat all their junk food (and feel INCREDIBLY guilty about it). When I got a little older and started getting pocket money, I started buying my own junk food to binge on. I never purged (although I've tried), partly because I hate wasting food & money, but also because I just physically can't make myself throw up?? Idk. But I've definitely been exercise purging so there's that.
I never thought this was super weird or ED behavior, but thought it was just part of life/emotional eating etc. However, I talked about with my psychologist a few months ago (who I'm seeing for some family issues), and she was really concerned. Since then I've been trying to stop binging (which previously would be like 2000-4000 calories each binge, which woukd happen twice a week approximately), and trying to lose some weight too, and I was doing really well with stopping binging, but with my internship and thesis writing stress this summer it has all come back, just as half of the kilo's I'd lost. So yeah, now I'm just posting here to get some accountability and because I finally found people that understand what I'm going through.
Okay this got kinda long, sorry! Anyway, thanks for reading 😘
PS: I'm on mobile so I can't flair (I think?)
[Rant/Rave] Purging for no reason...
/u/avocadorable [5'3.5" | 103.8 | 18.53 | -37 | F]
Created: Wed Sep 14 01:39:25 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52penx/purging_for_no_reason/
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So I purged again. Oops. I was trying to avoid it, and only really did it during major anxiety attacks. Today, for some reason, I decided to purge dinner in the shower... while my SO was literally 15 ft away in the other room.
I wasn't panicked, it was a low cal dinner (215). I was just rinsing off and suddenly and emotionlessly bent over and started purging. I don't know why I did it- it was a healthy meal, low carb, tasty.
I've been really good at keeping to it restricting between 400-750, but now I'm terrified that my bulimic tendencies are starting to come back. My ED started as bulimia, and I don't want that aspect of it back. The worst and most shameful part of that is that I don't want it back because *it didn't make me skinny* not because it's bad for my body. I could care less about that at this point.
Ugh.
[Thinspo] My body from freshman year of college. 😭
/u/throwaway03199519 [5'6 | CW 114 | GW 110| 18.47| -22| F]
Created: Wed Sep 14 00:44:55 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52p9j0/my_body_from_freshman_year_of_college/
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http://i.imgur.com/gAkxZ9a.jpg
[Rant/Rave] I personally find this kind of disgusting!
/u/BluestNovember [5'4" | SW: 200+ lbs | CW: too high | BMI: under 40 | -21lbs | F]
Created: Tue Sep 13 23:14:25 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52p015/i_personally_find_this_kind_of_disgusting/
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http://www.foodbeast.com/news/cheeseburger-pizza-mcd/
[Rant/Rave] TFW people try to tell you the reason why you have an ED LMAO
/u/sprinkle1997 [5'1 | CW 134 GW 100 | -22 lbs | 19F]
Created: Tue Sep 13 23:13:38 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52ozy2/tfw_people_try_to_tell_you_the_reason_why_you/
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Yesterday, I did some scavenger hunt type activity with my friends. It was a timed thing and was pretty intensive and competitive so we ran around our school campus like crazy. Of course, I had barely eaten. I had a little bit of mashed potatoes and two tomato slices or so. By the end of the hunt, I was feeling so weak like I was gonna pass out and it got so bad that everyone noticed. I only have one friend who knows about my ED and she suffers from one too. Though hers is more focused on control. Mine is based on the fact that I look like a fat fucking cow. Anyways, she asked me who I wanted to look like and what my ideal body was. And when I couldn't give an answer she told me my ED was just about control. That's not fucking true. Maybe I don't have a certain thinspo idol or specific body type I look up to like everybody else, but that doesn't mean it's about something else. I'm just upset that she was trying to tell me as if she made some groundbreaking realization for me when that's not the case at all. I have lots of control in my life. I just want to be skinny. That's what its about, I want to be fucking skinny.
I love busy days..
/u/AmAlreadyGoingToHell [H: 5"8 W: 129 GW: 110 F]
Created: Tue Sep 13 22:51:33 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52oxcm/i_love_busy_days/
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Get up at 6 am
Leave house at 7 am
Class at 9 am
Meeting at 10:30 am
Class at 1 pm till 5 pm
Getting my piercing checked at 5:30 pm
Train at 6:30 pm
Home at 8:15 pm
I will be tired, busy.. And won't have to keep myself busy by watching a hundred episodes of my 600lb life.
I also only packed about 200g of strawberries for the day, which I love.
[Intro] Back with a new name
/u/Anna_Duclair [6'0" | 133.0 | 17.34 | WL: 0 | TransF]
Created: Tue Sep 13 22:51:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52oxaw/back_with_a_new_name/
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Largely because I lost access to my old account, though I used to post here as u/Ethereal_Whisper. I've had my height re-measured at 6'0.1", and the first thing I thought of was that it would make my BMI lower than I thought it was before (I was previously going by 5'11.25"). I'll round to 6'0" here, I guess.
I don't really have much else to say other than that it feels good to be back. :)
[Rant/Rave] Today sucked.
/u/-Never_Mind- [5'2'' | 102 | 19.02 | F]
Created: Tue Sep 13 21:53:36 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52oq4d/today_sucked/
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I was all set to start a three day fast, but needless to say that didn't go as planned. I even started this morning off great with some tea and a few extra glasses of water. But by this afternoon I felt like I hadn't eaten in days. I felt so shaky and weird. I finally caved and ended up eating all the foods :-/ I normally only ever have one meal a day which wouldn't be till around eight at night, but I couldn't even make it till then! I was literally stuffing my face starting around three o'clock. What the f*ck is wrong with me...
[Rant/Rave] First Purge
/u/trapqueenB [5'4 | 134 lb | 23 | -30 lb | F/22]
Created: Tue Sep 13 21:52:13 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52opxy/first_purge/
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I've been pretty consistently restricting with one binge day a week.
I haven't been as good for the last week or so...
Today was one of those binge days and I decided to purge after because the scale said 137 this morning. That usually scares me into restricting but not today...idk. I can't believe I did.
I feel weird.
[Discussion] How do you deal with your boyfriend preferring you heavier?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Sep 13 21:50:35 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52oppq/how_do_you_deal_with_your_boyfriend_preferring/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] I messed up
/u/Para-Medic [5'1' | too much | too much |0 | F]
Created: Tue Sep 13 21:38:38 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52oo6q/i_messed_up/
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I have had a terrible diet week, at almost 2000 calories for the past 4 days. I feel nauseous all day. I feel like I'm trying to prove to myself that I'm in control of this, but if I'm eating until I'm nauseous, I'm obviously not.
I need to stop this craziness. I feel stupid. I thought I could control this. I can't. It's either all or nothing. I need the nothing.
When he sees me as sick, I'll be close to my goal.
Edit: I've been drinking all weekend too. I'm an alcoholic so it's a double failure.
[Rant/Rave] [Rant] I think some people are starting to suspect
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Sep 13 21:24:59 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52omcx/rant_i_think_some_people_are_starting_to_suspect/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] My bf said he wanted me to tell him about my ED, now that I have I don't think it was for the best
/u/supersizetrainwreck [5'9 | CW 125lb | 18.13 | F]
Created: Tue Sep 13 20:38:21 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52ofiv/my_bf_said_he_wanted_me_to_tell_him_about_my_ed/
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Since the end of May I've fallen heavily back into my ED ways mostly because it's how I've been dealing with the death of a close aunt. For a while I was hiding it because that's what I thought I needed to do in order to lose weight but once it got pretty bad and I started sharing small pieces of it with my bf he said he wanted me to tell him things and that I needed to get help. I've kind of put off the getting help part, although I saw someone for an initial appointment two weeks ago and got myself a physical, but I have been doing better about opening up to him. But now that I have he says that this is the worst he's ever seen it and it's only getting worse... I'm kind of scared to tell him that no in fact this is me actually getting better and if I had been confiding in him a month and a half ago that it would have been unbelievably worse. He's terrified which I get, he's never dealt with anything like this before, but when he says this is the absolute worst and it's now or never it feels like all the work I've done recently and all the courage that I've worked up to even say any of this out loud is meaningless. He has no idea how much better it is now because not only was I not telling him before, it was super easy to hide because he wasn't even really paying attention. I had to tell him I stopped eating before he even noticed. Tonight I had absolutely no desire to eat but I knew that I should and I knew that he was watching me so I asked him to tell me what to eat because I just had absolutely no interest. I wasn't asking him to make anything for me, he told me to have pasta and I cooked it and even served him some, but then he told me that he can't be responsible for my eating and all of this. I told him that I don't want him to be responsible for my eating but even when I find someone to talk to I'm still going to need help and tonight I just needed that little push, it's not like I asked him to make me food and force it down my throat, I wasn't refusing to eat I just honestly couldn't think of what to make because nothing looked good or like something I wanted. At this point I think I just need to stop talking to him about it so openly and go back to pretending everything is fine because at least then he felt like things were better... so much for being my support system.
[Discussion] Does anyone else use Peach? Want to be friends?
/u/ifuckpineapples [5'3" | 96.6 | 17.1 | F]
Created: Tue Sep 13 20:37:49 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52ofg5/does_anyone_else_use_peach_want_to_be_friends/
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So I'm not sure how popular it is, but theres this social media app called Peach on the [Google Play Store](https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=cool.peach&hl=en) and on the [App Store.](https://itunes.apple.com/us/app/peach-share-vividly/id1067891186?mt=8) It's kind of just for posting statuses/pictures/gifs/like a facebook feed, (there's also a built in chat) , but its all private unles you add somebody by name.
I know a few months ago there were a few people from this sub on it and we had all added each other for occasional support/motivation/ranting etc, but i lost my old account. I made a new one ('vertebreae', add me!). If anyone here is willing to share their accounts, I'd love to follow more people! It's nice to have somewhere to post all day and not feel like a bother.
[Help] Support? This is hard.
/u/oksneaky [63in | CW: 124.8 | GW: 115 | F]
Created: Tue Sep 13 20:27:04 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52odsf/support_this_is_hard/
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So... I have been using nicotine as a crutch for several years. I know a lot of you ladies smoke ciggies, as have I... but I've had a really hard trek with dipping. It gives me that oral fixation and also curbs my appetite. I want you ladies to know, so I am held accountable, that I have dipped since 2008 and stopped for over a year until last week when I decided I could cheat and get more so I would stop getting cravings. Tonight I had my last one, and for the first time in my life I went and bought Nicorette. I turn 30 on Thursday and I need to state somewhere, since NO ONE knows I do this, that I will NEVER have another one again. I quit smoking a few years back and substituted it with snuff and no longer will I allow that. I am DONE. Tonight, gum is my only nicotine. Please help me feel normal :( I see a lot of you admit to things that you don't want to and this is one that I really, really have held to myself and kept as a secret for way too long. 8 years of this shit and I AM DONE. Anyone else have any terrible addictions they want to own up to and quit with me to help them feel better? Anyone else, long shot, ever dipped to make their food cravings subside? I feel so gross admitting this :(
[Intro] New around here, but not to this.
/u/thisthingagain [5'3 | 133.2| 23.6 | 10 | F]
Created: Tue Sep 13 20:21:59 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52od1b/new_around_here_but_not_to_this/
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Just wanted to say hey. I'm in my mid/late twenties and I'm finally giving in and letting myself relapse. I began restricting at age 11 and was diagnosed at 16. I went through inpatient twice, and after losing my best friend to heart complications at 20, really decided to stick with being healthy. I gained 60 lbs, and am now at a perfectly average BMI of 24.5. Hooray.
For the past 7 years I've never liked how I look. I've always felt fat and ungainly at this size (more so than I ever did before). I hate how I look at this weight. I hate how I feel. I hate how my husband's fingertips sink into me, and how soft everything is. I miss my bones, and I miss the hunger. I tried to stick it out with healthy living, but I got my wedding photos back a few weeks ago, and pretty much every time I see them I want to cry.
I looked disgusting at my wedding. I hate it.
So after about 3 weeks of lurking around here, restricting, and fasting... I figure it's time to say hello. I miss being able to talk about my feelings with food, and am glad to have found this sub.
See y'all around.
[Help] I just took my first Prozac (10mg). Tell me what to expect in terms of binging and restricting.
/u/get-it_together [5'3 |160??| UGW 125 | F]
Created: Tue Sep 13 19:16:59 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52o379/i_just_took_my_first_prozac_10mg_tell_me_what_to/
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I'm on it for depression, anxiety, and binging. I'm taking one 10mg pill with dinner. What was it like for you? Can you take it on an empty stomach? I know you can't drink on it, but have you?
Thanks <3
[Thinspo] I need to get my collarbones how they used to be 😫 [Goal/Thinspo]
/u/screamingfalcon [5'7.5"/171.45cm | CW: 2fat4me | GW: 121 | UGW: 108 | F22]
Created: Tue Sep 13 19:16:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52o325/i_need_to_get_my_collarbones_how_they_used_to_be/
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http://m.imgur.com/xUNqT2I
[Rant/Rave] God dammit I'm hungry. *TW:Description of food/Meanspo*
/u/stephanynotstokes [5'5| too fat |-76 lbs | F]
Created: Tue Sep 13 18:38:35 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52nx74/god_dammit_im_hungry_twdescription_of_foodmeanspo/
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So I'm on day 7/??? ......i don't know how long I'm going to fast but I haven't eaten in 7 days. And the hunger is starting to get to me. Just now (its 8:29p.m) my moms boyfriend made: fried chicken covered in gravy, wild beans and rice with pees and carrots, macaroni and cheese with bacon bits, and fresh baked biscuits. My mom called me to the kitchen to grab the plate he made me and....I was so stunned to see all that food. My stomach started growling and my mom goes "I noticed you haven't been eating (she has no clue about my fasting or ED) so could you just take a couple bites?" And my heart sank so hard. So what did I do...get the fork really close to my mouth and pretend to chew on food and move food around my plate creating gaps in the food making it look like I ate. I told my mom I didn't want to eat too much this late at night and she agreed. But oh my god I almost gave in it looked so good. I ran back to my room and just kept repeating "I have control, I have control, I am fat, have control, do not be a pig".
I nearly broke today. Im sorry this is kind of a weird rant. I was just so consumed with anxiety my hands were shaking and I just needed to get this off my chest. I feel like in some way if I post what happened here I won't be tempted to sneak into the kitchen and take a bite of food. Because as we all know that "Just one bite" mentality will lead to a binge. And I can't risk that.
[Rant/Rave] weight check at the doctor's office...
/u/kennedyconnolly [5'9| 120 | 17.4]
Created: Tue Sep 13 18:36:19 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52nwu8/weight_check_at_the_doctors_office/
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so, because my parents know about my anorexia, they have hid the scale from me for five years now. i get weight checks at the doctor's office. these past two months i have been working really hard to restrict as much as i can and still run well, and it has paid off. i lost about 5 pounds from the last visit two months ago! (my flair is now updated) i knew i was feeling thinner, and this confirmed it! but now my parents and the doctors are freaking out and they wanted to take me off running, but i convinced them not to. but now i have to go to weekly weigh ins... i am just going to try and maintain... i am running so well too, primed to win my state cross country title, so i don't want to stop running. i am so conflicted with emotions right now: happy from weight loss, but scared from parents and running. i don't know what i'm looking for in terms of responses, just wanted to share my day.
weight check at the doctors...
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Sep 13 18:35:17 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52nwos/weight_check_at_the_doctors/
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[deleted]
[Tip] Proud of my modified caprese salad: 290 calorie lunch
/u/depressionbunny [5'6" | 138 | 22.6 | -12 | FM]
Created: Tue Sep 13 18:26:27 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52nvbe/proud_of_my_modified_caprese_salad_290_calorie/
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I substituted tofu for mozzarella, saving close to 545 calories right there. Then I added cucumber for bulk and because they're delicious. Overall, it tasted amazing and I'm so pleased that the tofu worked as such a fulfilling replacement for cheese (something I have a very hard time giving up).
295g Ripe Tomato
165g Cucumber
220g Tofu
3g Fresh Basil
4g Olive Oil
25g Balsamic Vinegar
[Rant/Rave] its the little comments...
/u/skinnylove73 [5'10 | 125 | 17.49 | -15 | F]
Created: Tue Sep 13 18:16:02 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52ntnk/its_the_little_comments/
---
yesterday I was complaining about being cold and someone replied saying, "well you're so damn skinny! gain 20 lbs and you can keep your warmth in!"
made me feel great :) but also still cold... lol
[Tip] My new best friend <3
/u/BlackFlagWhiteSails [5'5" | 111.4 | 18.76 | F/23]
Created: Tue Sep 13 16:58:42 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52ngx4/my_new_best_friend_3/
---
I looooove Brie cheese but haven't had it in awhile, found this at a discount food store and it's sooo good! http://m.imgur.com/vOwPQYt
[Help] I'm exhausted
/u/Icantdrive49
Created: Tue Sep 13 16:50:45 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52nfp7/im_exhausted/
---
When restricting how do you keep your energy up? I'm doing spin about 4 days a week and try not to eat more than 600 but I'm tired all the time. Any advice?
[Help] Am I expecting too much from therapy?
/u/FeedMeDreams [5'5" | 64kg | 23.5 | F]
Created: Tue Sep 13 15:56:59 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52n6g6/am_i_expecting_too_much_from_therapy/
---
I started going to therapy (again) a while ago. My life is much better now than it used to be, and I feel fine most of the time. But I can't stop purging. More accurately, I can't stop bingeing. I don't know why. I try not to, but it's incredibly hard, and I don't understand why. I like my therapist, but I'm starting to feel like I should have made more progress by now. Is it me?
[Other] Picture Me Broken - Skin and Bones
/u/smokesanddietcokes [Doesn't actually know what she's talking about.]
Created: Tue Sep 13 15:31:52 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52n1po/picture_me_broken_skin_and_bones/
---
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zr0xfuxGY74
[Rant/Rave] Reasons that I binge
/u/crapbeg
Created: Tue Sep 13 15:27:51 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52n0zn/reasons_that_i_binge/
---
So yet again today, I binged.
It could be worse (ate to maintenance) but it definitely counts as a binge because it was disgusting. It was me, tearing at 5 individually wrapped packs of 2 oreos, desperately trying to get the wrapper off as though I hadn't eaten in weeks. Scraping off the cream (20 extra kcal) and then diving in. Over 300 kcal, just like that.
This one was triggered by my friends discussing the weight loss of a couple of my other friends, one who looks incredible these days and about whom everyone is worried, and the other who seems to have lost weight in a very healthy way.
Seeing my friends also meant that I had to eat a bit, some food which I couldn't count calories for accurately because I didn't have nutritional info/couldn't weigh it. My food habits triggered the usual 'are you just eating ___' comment which meant that I ate dessert (120 kcal) and hated myself a bit.
I then checked the nutritional info for the food I ate - closer to 350kcal than the 200kcal I initially aimed for.
I hate feeling this out of control when I can't accurately count calories. I just hate feeling this out of control in general.
[Discussion] Starting phentermine for the first time
/u/Peretticoffee
Created: Tue Sep 13 15:19:15 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52mzdl/starting_phentermine_for_the_first_time/
---
Any tips or advice?
[Help] What gym machines/exercises burn the most calories?
/u/itsybitsyelephant [5'2 | CW 118 | GW 105]
Created: Tue Sep 13 15:07:56 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52mx86/what_gym_machinesexercises_burn_the_most_calories/
---
I'm going to the gym today and after consuming more calories than I originally planned (1,200 vs 400 :[) I'm looking for specific workouts that tend to burn more calories... I'm really at a loss. Does anyone have any input? Thank you!
[Discussion] How do you guys deal with after-work binging?
/u/eightstone [Height: 5ft 7 | CW: 9st 12lbs| BMI: 21 | Gender: F]
Created: Tue Sep 13 14:28:44 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52mpjy/how_do_you_guys_deal_with_afterwork_binging/
---
I am at most risk of binge eating when I get home after work. Not eating at work isn't a problem but a wave of tiredness and anxiety hits me as I walk through the front door and washes away my resolve. I head to the gym at about half six in the morning and don't get home until about eight in the evening. The best way I have found to avoid binge eating in the evening is to have a pre-workout supplement drink just before heading home. The caffeine gives me a boost of energy and suppresses my appetite. It's quite rich and creamy and 45 calories, so it also lines my stomach and makes me feel less empty. Then, ideally, I head upstairs and avoid the kitchen for the remainder of the day. I'd be really interested to know if anybody else struggles with this time of day as well, and how you deal with it.
[Discussion] At what point in calorie intake do YOU personally stop seeing its impact on weight loss?
/u/itsybitsyelephant [5'2 | CW 118 | GW 105]
Created: Tue Sep 13 13:53:35 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52mio7/at_what_point_in_calorie_intake_do_you_personally/
---
As in, I could eat 100 calories and be miserable for the day, or 550 (and be more or less satiated) and, in a week, see the same amount of weight loss (by about .10 of a pound). What is the cutoff/average amount for you in which a larger deficit doesn't really help you lose significantly more?
I, however, see a massive difference in my weight in a week between consuming ~1000 calories versus ~500 calories. How does it work for you?
[Help] I don't think I can do this but I don't think I have a choice
/u/woollyshirt [172cm | 54.3kg | 18.19 | -33.7kg | NB/M]
Created: Tue Sep 13 13:50:32 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52mi1v/i_dont_think_i_can_do_this_but_i_dont_think_i/
---
https://imgur.com/LaT2JrQ I feel like my weight graph will explain my anxiety pretty easily.
I've not eaten over, or even close to, maintenance once this month. I've been eating more, sure, but I absolutely never expected this and every day seems like the day my weight will finally sort itself out but the trend only seems to be increasing...I think tomorrow I'm going to be over 56kg and that feels absolutely horrible. I don't think I can eat less though given that I've got to exercise more now. How can I cope with this? No one seems to understand how useless and disgusting I feel. I hate myself so much for this and I don't know what to do...I can't eat less and exercising more just seems like it leads to more water weight, which leads me right back to where I started and makes me feel hopeless all over again.
How long should I put up with this for before changing *something?* Is this normal and my ED brain is just fucking me up? Will I ever see under 54kg while eating like this? I desperately want to take a break from weighing myself but I don't feel like I can- the fear of gaining and not knowing that I'm gaining feels like too much to cope with, and I also use the TDEE spreadsheet which needs daily weights.
What the hell do I do now? :(
[Tip] Zucchini Salad for 25 cal/serving - NYT Cooking is a fantastic site
/u/nature1 [5'7" | 122 | blegh]
Created: Tue Sep 13 13:38:11 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52mfme/zucchini_salad_for_25_calserving_nyt_cooking_is_a/
---
http://cooking.nytimes.com/recipes/3660-zucchini-salad?smid=fb-nytdining&smtyp=cur
[Help] Tips to start jogging?
/u/finnkat
Created: Tue Sep 13 13:37:53 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52mfke/tips_to_start_jogging/
---
I'm trying to exercise more and really want to start jogging (I've recently been doing things like crunches, sit ups, etc. in my room and walking) but I feel a bit nervous about it? I feel like I don't know where to start which seems silly cause it's just jogging but does anyone have any tips? For the actual excercise but also for mental preperation maybe? I feel nervous with people watching me jog and am also a bit paranoid about being attacked (kidnapped, sexually assualted etc.) which again seems silly but idk. Any help you guys could offer would be more than welcome.
[Other] Rough but good?
/u/Skinniminnie [5'3" | 157.0 lbs | 27.6 BMI | -12 lbs | F]
Created: Tue Sep 13 13:35:35 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52mf4n/rough_but_good/
---
I fell off last week after a wedding the weekend prior until Sunday. Now I'm back on my normal restricting which consists of lunch and then munching on frozen grapes at night. Today though one of my classmates made a comment on my lunch and I got hyper defensive and then tried to justify my being defensive by saying it looks like more than it is.
I typically calculate in my head because im paranoid of real calorie counts so I ended up counting it all with an app and it added up to about 600 based on what I ate and will eat tonight. The one time I've felt so much better about my decisions.
[Rant/Rave] I feel like shit all the time [rant]
/u/disbeetch [5'3'' | 140 | 24.8 | -28 | F]
Created: Tue Sep 13 13:27:48 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52mdmh/i_feel_like_shit_all_the_time_rant/
---
When I restrict, I'm proud of myself for not eating but I feel like I'm gonna throw up from hunger pains. When I do eat, I feel like a total fuckup and I feel like I'm gonna throw up from all the food. Can't win.
[Rant/Rave] I walked out of class to purge.
/u/throwawaysecretsssss
Created: Tue Sep 13 13:06:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52m9lk/i_walked_out_of_class_to_purge/
---
Guys, i'm crazy stressed and upset over this damn class. I'm eating in secret. HARD. I went to go pee, but my belly was so full I couldn't help the urge to purge. No hands. And now i'm sitting in class acting like nothing happened.
God help me.
[Discussion] How good is hunger as a predictor of weight loss?
/u/kpatable [5'9" | 124.6 | 18.1/18.4 | -22.4 | F]
Created: Tue Sep 13 13:02:42 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52m8qs/how_good_is_hunger_as_a_predictor_of_weight_loss/
---
**TL;DR**: If I don't satiate my hunger every time my body is hungry, does that mean I will lose weight?
My goal is around 1600 calories a day. I've met that goal more or less for the past six days (I had an 1800 day and a 1900 day). I usually have 4 to 5 meals, 3 to 4 hours apart, at 200-500 calories each. My meals are usually at 7:30am, noon, 3pm and 7pm. I usually get hungry ~2 hours after eating even though I eat mostly whole foods (I know processed foods make you hungrier). With this all in mind, is the hunger predictive of weight loss? I just don't understand why I get hungry hours before my planned meal on 1600 calories a day, and the only answer I can think of is because my TDEE is more than a 100-200 calories higher than 1600; if this is true, then I'd lose weight. What do you all think?
[Rant/Rave] When you go to the doctor knowing you need antibiotics
/u/AmAlreadyGoingToHell [H: 5"8 W: 129 GW: 110 F]
Created: Tue Sep 13 12:01:31 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52lwi3/when_you_go_to_the_doctor_knowing_you_need/
---
And you ask: "Does it need to be taken in with yoghurt?" And the answer is NO!
yay, yaaaaaaaaaaay
[Meme/Humor] Wise Words from Roald Dahl
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Sep 13 11:56:06 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52lvdj/wise_words_from_roald_dahl/
---
[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] tried to eat breakfast today after purging last night [rant]
/u/turnonmyrighthand [4'9 | 86lb | F]
Created: Tue Sep 13 11:26:49 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52lpdf/tried_to_eat_breakfast_today_after_purging_last/
---
ha! yeah right.
once i do it, my whole week is screwed up to where i need to vomit all my food to feel better (physically, not mentally. my stomach just rejects it). im sure you guys know exactly what im talking about.
so i ended up having to purge at work -_-
[Tip] PSA: Love yourself, love other people. Quit fatshaming.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Sep 13 11:17:04 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52lnf2/psa_love_yourself_love_other_people_quit/
---
[deleted]
[Other] I was about to binge when I saw this. Xpost from /r/woahdude.
/u/_pizzagirl [5'5 | 125.2lbs | gw:110 | -29.4 | f]
Created: Tue Sep 13 11:16:56 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52lnea/i_was_about_to_binge_when_i_saw_this_xpost_from/
---
http://imgur.com/a/wn017
[Tip] Best thing since Halo Top? High-protein, low sugar brownie and cookie batters (nut and whey protein based)
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Sep 13 10:50:39 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52li3k/best_thing_since_halo_top_highprotein_low_sugar/
---
http://www.gbutter.com/online-store
[Intro] General Intro/Rant
/u/autumn-lights [5'5| CW 171 | 28.5 | F]
Created: Tue Sep 13 10:45:41 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52lh7j/general_introrant/
---
Hi there. You know the drill - long time lurker, first time poster, made an account to post here so it wasn't on my main. Anyway. This might get long, so strap in.
I used to struggle with anorexia in high school. I'm 21 now, and I definitely thought I was recovered and all of that was behind me. I honestly hadn't restricted in an unhealthy way for *years*. But here I am, getting married in 8 months, and eating 300 calories a day because I want to look pretty on my wedding day, and right now I just look fat. I don't even know what happened.
I was eating about 1200 calories a day, no disordered thoughts, losing slowly but steadily. A couple weeks ago, I had had a good day and ended right at 1200. But my fiancee left for the evening, and I had a mini-binge of crackers and peanut butter, and totally ruined the day. I had a freakout and purged (which I never did, even back at the height of my anorexia back in the day), and ever since then the thought of eating has me completely panicking. I would be fasting, but my fiancee and I live together so I've been eating a small salad or whatever every night and keeping it under 300. I've lost 6 pounds since I started, which was great.
On Sunday, though, I was tattooed for over 7 hours, and I have a tendency to pass out if I don't eat when I am being tattooed, so I ate breakfast and lunch that day. I still ended the day well under 1200, but today I woke up 3 pounds heavier! UGH. I know it's water weight, but I just feel devastated. So here I am. /endrant
Thanks for taking the time to read this long-ass post. I'm glad this community exists.
[Rant/Rave] Started going to counseling...but I feel like a fraud
/u/abond4 [5'7.5 | 127 | 19.6 | -53 | F]
Created: Tue Sep 13 10:36:44 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52lfee/started_going_to_counselingbut_i_feel_like_a_fraud/
---
Last Friday I went to counseling for the first time to talk about my ED struggles...but I mainly did it so I can continue to lose weight under the guise of "I'm going to treatment" so my husband and friends don't get worried when I start getting thinner.
I feel really bad about it though. I'm two sessions in and I'm taking this poor counselor's time away from someone who could actually use his help. On top of it all he's a new doctoral student so I'm probably one of his first regular patients. He seems to really like me too...how would he feel knowing that he's wasting his time? He's teaching me to think about positive things before negative ones so that's at least helpful...but still.
My heart sunk when he told me that he was really happy that I came to get help because most people are too proud. I'm a fake.
Feel free to berate me for being a piece of shit. Thank you.
[Help] I really need workout ideas >.<
/u/winterpopp [ 5'7" | GW: <100 | F22]
Created: Tue Sep 13 10:26:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52ldgc/i_really_need_workout_ideas/
---
I don't know if anyone else is as "picky" about workouts as me.. I have a really large cup size even though I'm on the lower end of the "healthy" BMI range, so it hurts to do jumping jacks and run and other things that make you, well bounce(and I hate running because I get so much anxiety about other people seeing me work out)
I've literally just been busting out how ever many sit ups I can do, or random motions with weights. That's another thing, I want to do some kind of cardio mostly, but I also want to have strength a little. Do you guys have a specific routine? Like arms one day, ect. Any tips? I'm pretty novice with working out tbh and sorry that this post is a rambley mess
[Goal] You're not THAT big.
/u/kelseyjodiepen
Created: Tue Sep 13 10:23:34 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52lcss/youre_not_that_big/
---
So I'm having a very hard time right. I've been in half recovery from my ed for a few years now. My boyfriend has been very supportive but today.....he informed me that "I'm not even that big." I just feel sick. So this is me more or less me declaring my self back to Ana. A statement of I will never hear that phrase come out of his of anyone else mouth.
[Discussion] Daily Food Diary! September 13, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Tue Sep 13 10:02:13 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52l8m7/daily_food_diary_september_13_2016/
---
This is a daily food diary thread for September 13, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
[Discussion] How are you doing?
/u/stephanynotstokes [5'5| too fat |-76 lbs | F]
Created: Tue Sep 13 09:40:24 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52l4c5/how_are_you_doing/
---
How are you doing? Dont bullshit me with an "I'm okay" response. No, tell me how you're REALLY doing. Are you upset because you gained a pound? Or got a bad grade? Broke up with your significant other?
Talk to me about it. Its important to talk especially dealing with such an isolating illness. I thought about this because someone posted about suicidal and depressed feelings while dealing with their ED. And I just think its important that we seriously address whats going on in our lives because if we dont talk to each other honestly....then who are we going to talk to?
[Discussion] I feel guilty (rant)
/u/stephanynotstokes [5'5| too fat |-76 lbs | F]
Created: Tue Sep 13 09:25:37 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52l1e6/i_feel_guilty_rant/
---
So, today I was in Starbucks and Im in there so often I pretty much know everyone that works there. Today one of the baristas I hadnt seen in a while looks at me and goes "Oh my god you look so different". So I explained that I had lost some weight. She talked about how great I looked and she asked me what my secret to loosing weight was.
At that point, I had to lie. Say I ate healthily, exercised etc.. And idk I feel guilty because many people are so proud of me for loosing weight but they dont know its because of my ED and not because im doing anything healthy. I feel guilty because it feels like false advice in a way.
[Rant/Rave] Don't say that "you'll start tomorrow" don't let today become another excuse!
/u/HowToBeAsian25 [5'3.5 |113lbs |19.78 |-19 | F]
Created: Tue Sep 13 08:43:04 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52ktcq/dont_say_that_youll_start_tomorrow_dont_let_today/
---
How often has starting tomorrow ever worked? How much better would it feel to just start today?! The best time to start is now, right now. Forget yesterday, forget the breakfast you just ate, and forget about all the excuses you're already forming in your head for a high cal lunch and dinner.
The time to be strong is now, and the time to really let your will power shine through is right now people...
All these beautiful transformation Tuesday pics, well lets add our victories to that list as well. whether it be 5lbs, 10lbs, 50lbs, +100lbs... We can do this, we got this and were starting today!
Excuses can be the most gratifying thing on the planet, but it's cutting us down, making us think less of ourselves. FUCK excuses, it's time to get the fuck on.
Good Luck everyone!
[Rant/Rave] I hit rock bottom. My friends urged me to recover. Now they're throwing it in my face constantly.
/u/ifuckpineapples [5'3" | 96.6 | 17.1 | F]
Created: Tue Sep 13 08:37:55 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52ksdm/i_hit_rock_bottom_my_friends_urged_me_to_recover/
---
Well, at least it feels like it. I know they aren't really.
Long story short(ish): two weeks ago, I was feeling really hungry and anxious while having a night in with the gf and decided to get drunk so I could binge a bit. I have almost no food anxiety when drunk, usually. But it had been such a shit few weeks, that getting drunk made my anxiety worse, horribly worse, to the point where I broke down crying and locked myself in the bathroom because I was scared of touching food. Eesh, yeah, Im a fun person. That lead to quite a talk...
Anyways, queue the inevitable 'maybe I'll just eat healthy for awhile' streak. I felt anxious about hitting/nearing maintenance so many days in a row. Then I got sick for a week and a half with some kind of flu;recurring fever, exhaustion, boughts of dizziness/disorientation. I felt like shit for eating normally, and now I had to definitely keep it up for another week to get better. I tried fasting one of the sick days and almost had to leave work sick because the whole room was spinning. unfortunately only food and rest made it better. Fuck. Then I had friends over for the whole weekend and drank/ate nonstop. Double fuck.
Enter Sunday morning:105lbs. /U/ifuckpineapples, you are officially fat. You are disgusting. You fucked up.
Logically, that was loads of food and water weight from all the booze. I restricted since then and weighed in this morning at 101 before a BM, so I can only hope my 'actual' weight is more like 100 or 99lbs. But God, I hate that I have this cycle of "restrict till you feel like dying, eat till you feel like dying, repeat'. Like dammit, will I ever learn? Now I have to work back down to 95, fuck.
Oh, and my gf and friend keep happening to talk about food and eating. My gf was using mfp for a few months, and stopped the last few weeks. I swear, the day I realized I was fat she started asking about how many calories were in things and what lighter options we had and shit. Oh and my friend happens to be bringing up that she just skips breakfast now and only drinks on an empty stomach and has made this great low cal recipe. It all makes me feel self-conscious. It feels like it's not a coincidence, it's like I'm secretly being made fun of by the universe.
So, new semester, new restriction cycle. Yippee. Feel free to join me. /Rant
[Rant/Rave] Just in general being a lazy piece of shit
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Sep 13 07:54:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52kkg0/just_in_general_being_a_lazy_piece_of_shit/
---
[deleted]
[Discussion] DAE use exercise as means of purging?
/u/dbishop22
Created: Tue Sep 13 07:28:04 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52kfwl/dae_use_exercise_as_means_of_purging/
---
I hate the waste of food, so I refuse to b/p. I don't really even binge so to speak. It's kind of a weekly cycle. Monday I'll eat the lowest amount of calories, usually around 600 but that number will slowly rise and creep up over the course of the week. So by Sunday I'm usually eating 1200kcals. The more eat, the worse I feel and the worse I feel the more I crave hard exercise. Running, and weightlifting primarily right now.
[Tip] I thought a lot of people could benefit from reading this so I decided to share. :)
/u/peanutbutteredbanana
Created: Tue Sep 13 07:17:47 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52kebk/i_thought_a_lot_of_people_could_benefit_from/
---
https://i.reddituploads.com/59eeec60ad6a4f5b845d9dec40cfb012?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=d11519c949cdea3c4a37e9571f13c17f
[Discussion] Self-care and Beauty Q+A September 13, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Tue Sep 13 06:02:55 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52k2su/selfcare_and_beauty_qa_september_13_2016/
---
Eating disorders are real, complex, and devastating conditions that can have serious consequences for physical health. Use this thread to discuss harm reduction and beauty tips, plus suggestions on how to build back up the physical self before and after engaging in disordered behaviors.
Please be wary of false advice and information. Be sure to research the facts before taking anyone's advice, no matter who they are. Remember that diagnosing members is unacceptable. **Anyone looking for medical guidance should seek the opinion of a medically licensed professional.**
*****
Self-care and beauty threads are posted every Tuesday.
Have any questions or concerns? Comment below, or [PM the mods.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FproED)
[Thinspo] a little album of thinspo I found on instagram
/u/tinybites [5'6" | sw: 185 | cw: 159.5 | gw: 115]
Created: Tue Sep 13 05:55:51 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52k1w2/a_little_album_of_thinspo_i_found_on_instagram/
---
http://m.imgur.com/a/PcIco
[Goal] [Transformation Tuesday?] Less than a year between photos
/u/Theriley106 [6' 5"| 164 | 18.08 | -130 | M]
Created: Tue Sep 13 05:47:37 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52k0uk/transformation_tuesday_less_than_a_year_between/
---
https://imgur.com/a/kCvdA
[Rant/Rave] Just got called "piggy"
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Sep 13 05:29:47 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52jyns/just_got_called_piggy/
---
[deleted]
[Tip] If you need a quick lunch to take to work, I would suggest this. 280 calories per container.
/u/TessTobias [5'5" | 120 | 19.7 | -22]
Created: Tue Sep 13 05:25:35 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52jy5g/if_you_need_a_quick_lunch_to_take_to_work_i_would/
---
http://m.imgur.com/OmSbe0R
[Discussion] Does anyone here like matcha?
/u/Mrs-Schrute [5'9" | 117 lbs | 16.97 | -40 | 19F]
Created: Tue Sep 13 02:08:48 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52jdce/does_anyone_here_like_matcha/
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So I've always loved green tea, especially on fasting days. I recently found out about matcha powder (apparently I live under a rock) and while I like the flavor, I don't exactly love it. I usually put a bit of splenda in it and just drink it like that.
I guess my problem is the chunks. Like, no matter what I do they will not fully dissolve! I also want to drink it iced sometimes but that's soooo much worse.
If any of y'all have any advice that would be great.
[Rant/Rave] The upside to getting dumped
/u/Melatoninsky [5'3"| CW:112 lbs | GW: 99 lbs | F]
Created: Tue Sep 13 01:07:04 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52j74p/the_upside_to_getting_dumped/
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Relationship problems are pretty much the only stressor that make me completely lose my appetite. It's actually how this relapse started over a year ago, my boyfriend at the time ended up relapsing on heroin and I didn't eat for basically a week which led to weight loss which led to full blown ED relapse. It's been almost a year since we broke up and I've been dating around, kinda flirting with recovery, gaining and losing the same 5-8 lbs... But lately I've been sliding, hard. I developed a pretty shitty purge habit but I've been getting better at just restricting and dealing with the hunger.
Well, this guy I've been seeing for the last 3 or so months, we just mutually ended things tonight. And I feel like total shit. It sucks. But under the shittiness is the knowledge that I definitely will not have an appetite for the next 2-3 weeks. Which means finally breaking this shitty pattern I've gotten into and losing steadily again.
And it's funny because EDs are supposed to be bad for you but really the only thing keeping me from offing myself these days is this goal I have. I don't want to die at this weight. I have to weigh less. That's the goal. That's motivating me to stay alive. So my ED is supposedly slowly killing me but also somehow keeping me here.
Anyone else? Idk. This is rambly. Sorry. I just have no one else to talk to about any of this. He was way too attractive for someone like me anyway. Like literally he was a model. Idk what he was doing with me in the first place. I'm so dumb.
[Other] Something I just realized about my ED...
/u/TiredOfBeingFat_ [6'0"| CW251 |BMI34 | 22lost | GW130]
Created: Tue Sep 13 01:01:17 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52j6j5/something_i_just_realized_about_my_ed/
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I don't know why I want to thin. At first my weight loss was just to be a little more confident in myself and be healthy. And now, when I realized I'm a binge eater, I know when I get to my original "end goal" 200. I won't be happy. I'll want to keep going... Until I'm almost nothing.
I do not find super thin women attractive personally, yet I want to be one. My boyfriend has already expressed his dislike to my ED behaviors and tell me if I'm losing weight for him to stop, because he loves me the way I am. That's not it and I'm not doing it for other people either. Often I see women who are definitely bigger than me, and I think they are hotter than hell. But then I look at myself in the mirror, and I just want to smash it; I'm so disgusted.
I see a lot about control. If I don't keep up with it, I lose control of myself, and then everything is just fucked up in my head. Yet I don't know why I behave and think the way I do...? Control seems to it pretty good. But I don't think that's just it.
Also. Sorry I've been kind of spamming the community lately. You guys are just super supportive and amazing. And have helped me a lot. :)
[Rant/Rave] I honestly do not think I can have any food in my apartment.
/u/aerienne [5'5" | 138 | 23.2 | -32 | F]
Created: Tue Sep 13 00:33:18 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52j3ky/i_honestly_do_not_think_i_can_have_any_food_in_my/
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I live in a small studio apartment, so it's not like I can stay away from the kitchen. It's just too much. Even foods I would normally never binge on, I'm eating out of boredom. I'm out a lot, but I still have to spend time here too.
I will allow myself to keep:
* Coffee, cream, sugar, a box of Weetabix.
I cook dinner for a family every weeknight and have to eat with them, so I think I'm going to make that my only meal each day. It's a balanced meal and it will be good to end with it.
A recovering bulimic with a credit card and her own place is a recipe for disaster. It feels me with anxiety going to the store and trying to convince myself I can keep all the food for a week and then it's gone in an hour.
I've stopped binging/purging before cold turkey and I can do it again. Realistically surviving off coffee most of the day is fine. It'll make dinner taste really good and I can't overeat because I'm eating with other people.
I hate food so much. It's too much.
[Discussion] Does anyone else not have "ED thought?"
/u/Lunar_Heart [61.75 | 86 lbs | 16.47 | -23 | f]
Created: Mon Sep 12 23:13:37 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52iuta/does_anyone_else_not_have_ed_thought/
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I've never had ED thoughts.
Ever.
My thought process is literally just "I want to loose weight and maintain a small waist, but I love eating... well, dieting is out of the question, so I guess purging it is!"
It has nothing to do with anything other than vanity.
It's about how I want to look.
It's not a coping mechanism. It's not for a sense of control. It's just to a have a hot body. I'm so sick of people (doctors, family, everyone who's ever read a psych central article) telling me that *can't* be the case. No ones in my head but me. Only I know what I feel.
Is that weird or wrong?
Sometimes I feel like a deviant even among others with unconventional habits.
[Rant/Rave] i'm trying to convince myself not to
/u/gin-and-lemon [🐝 5'1"| cw: 155lbs | bmi: 30 | -7lbs | f ]
Created: Mon Sep 12 22:43:19 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52iqzy/im_trying_to_convince_myself_not_to/
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i fucked up my 48 hour fast 24 hours into it, and i'm now at 658 calories.
i have a can of tomato soup just sitting in front of me, and i really want to eat it. if i don't, i at least stay within my normal day maximum. warm soup just sounds so good rn.
its like, i already fucked up, so i might as well keep fucking up, but i shouldn't??? ugh
[Other] I hit a new/weird low
/u/mermaid_puppy [5'11" | 137lb | UGW 115 | F]
Created: Mon Sep 12 22:28:53 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52ip4n/i_hit_a_newweird_low/
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I fasted pretty well today, but then I got hungry at 11:30pm. Instead of eating, I c/s. Does anyone else feel guilty wasting food when they do this? I do.
So my new low was that I chewed deli meat and a bagel and spit it out for my dog to eat. It wasn't too much, so he won't get an upset tummy. No food was "wasted." I am disgusting for feeding my dog my chewed food, but he actually seemed pretty happy about it. Wtf is wrong with me
[Help] MFP question
/u/salamanderqueen [5'9"| CW: 149 | SW: 180 | GW: 120 | -31 | 19F]
Created: Mon Sep 12 22:07:22 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52imdg/mfp_question/
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So I know MFP can and will ban users for eating too few calories. Because of that I never 'complete' my daily food entries. BUT my goal weight in the app is 120, which MFP seems to think is too low. Everytime I add in a new weight, I get a page warning me that that weight is too low for my height, and asking me if I want to change my goal weight. Can MFP ban me for aiming for a weight that they consider too low? Has anyone dealt with this before? How can I work around it if it's a problem?
Thanks!
EDIT: [here's] (http://imgur.com/a/VsxGj) a link to the warning screen that I get when I enter a weight.
[Discussion] I just bought some miracle noodles!
/u/hayleystark [5'4"|NB]
Created: Mon Sep 12 22:06:14 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52im8t/i_just_bought_some_miracle_noodles/
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I need some recipes & tips on how to cook them! I'm so excited my area carries them now
[Rant/Rave] Post-suicidal ED feels like some strange limbo.
/u/cannibale101 [5'4 | HW:150smtg | CW: heh | GW:108 | 28F]
Created: Mon Sep 12 21:20:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52ifuq/postsuicidal_ed_feels_like_some_strange_limbo/
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*Sorry for posting a lot these days, i just have some thinking to do and this place feels right for that*
I've thought about suicide a lot in the last decade. I almost did kill myself a few years ago but finally decided that life could be something else than what my abusers made of it. I learned to get stronger and opened up to a few people and it helps me everyday, but it remains very obvious how much harder it is for people like me (and like a lot of people in this community) to go through each day and to just feel fine.
EDs don't really seem to fit in that kind of scenario where you work on getting better for your own sake. I don't want to die anymore and managed to put my life together more than i thought i ever could, but i still actively want to disappear ; i still feel incredibly conflicted and tortured being with myself and being around food, human warmth, kindness, anything close to "care". I still love my life most when i'm starved, lonely, ignored, weak and slowed down to a maximum, floating in some obsessing, alienating world in my head. I still want my ED to take over my life.
I learn everyday to love myself, to get involved, do things and be proud, and yet, i still love and miss and feel like i'm betraying a huge part of myself. It is a destructive but substantial part of me and it's hard to let go. It's as though there were two me's trying to live this post-suicidal limbo-like life. One who wants to live, one who wants to die.
ED take time and energy...
/u/cannibale101 [5'4 | HW:150smtg | CW: heh | GW:108 | 28F]
Created: Mon Sep 12 19:53:21 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52i2ek/ed_take_time_and_energy/
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I'm entering my -hopefully- last year of school ever. Starting a teaching internship at a nice college while working full time at a new position at my other work.
In the last three years i consciously decided to hit the pause button on my physical and mental health in order to get through my thesis. I put on a lot of weight during that time and swore to myself that after that, i would never sacrifice myself like that again. I would get thin again and go lower than my previous LW, because that's how i like to live and because without that monster of a thesis always creeping around, i f*cking can.
Hell here we are again. I have no time to work out, no possibility to get through a day without a considerable amount of stocked energy and i'm sleep deprived not just because of anxiety, but mostly because i have to work late at night and early the day after. Accomplishing stuff, "going places" and all. Hating myself.
Really looking forward to some ordinary routine i can finally stick to and make some space for the ED again. But damn it takes up time and energy. I'd like to like myself while doing those other awesome things with my life, but all i want right now is to throw everything away and just... work out and not eat.
[Tip] To avoid black and white thinking, I came up with a grading system.
/u/kpatable [5'9" | 124.6 | 18.1/18.4 | -22.4 | F]
Created: Mon Sep 12 19:41:43 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52i0hz/to_avoid_black_and_white_thinking_i_came_up_with/
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Every day, you score your progress based on how many calories you consumed relative to your goal. For every 100 calories you ate over your goal, you get 1 point. For every 100 calories you ate under your goal, you get -1 point. If you ate within 100 calories of your goal, then you score 0. At the end of the week, you add up everything, and that's your weekly grade. The higher the number, the worse the grade.
I came up with this tonight, and already it's helping me not binge tonight. Because I don't to add a whopping ~20 points to my score. And like, I like this because every calorie is equal, versus me only being perfect or imperfect. If you score yourself with this system, I imagine it will be harder to think "I over ate by X amount, so today is a failure" regardless of how large X is.
I know we already track so many other things, but we like it, right? :P I know I do! And thinking about it like this I think will really help me. Hopefully it will help someone else, too :]
Roommate made egg salad sandwiches
/u/letttucepray
Created: Mon Sep 12 19:33:47 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52hz7s/roommate_made_egg_salad_sandwiches/
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On mobile, can't flair.
I had fasted all day and was doing so well at keeping myself occupied... Until I came home. Roommate had made egg salad sandwiches so I couldn't say no to her because she made food just for the two of us. I ended up having one sandwich and three rice cakes. I will be pulling an all nighter so I'll be drinking several cups of coffee (with creamer) so with that I'll probably be around 600 calories for the day. I'm so disappointed in myself. I had lost four pounds in a week by restricting and this past weekend I binged a few days because of drama that's going on at work. The scale went up half a pound this morning. :/
I'm gonna stop aiming to fast all day and instead eat a decent (100-200) calorie breakfast so I can get through school. I think what did me in was that I hadn't eaten anything all day and egg salad is my weakness. Bf is coming to town next week so I was hoping to lose some more by then, but now I'm doubtful. I guess I'll just have to be extremely good for the next week. Ah, I feel like I need a hug from someone who understands the struggle.
Wishing you guys a good week <3
[Help] I'm posting this to keep myself accountable: I will NOT binge tonight.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Sep 12 19:03:11 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52hu5u/im_posting_this_to_keep_myself_accountable_i_will/
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[deleted]
[Help] Curbing boredom eating/how to stop treating eating as an activity?
/u/caithaa [5'7 | 156 | 24 | -33]
Created: Mon Sep 12 18:59:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52htlh/curbing_boredom_eatinghow_to_stop_treating_eating/
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I'm back at college now, and I've noticed a ridiculous pattern I want to fix. I try to eat a big 300 cal breakfast, then spend my entire day on campus fasting or having a couple cups of coffee. After my classes are done, so around 7-8 hours later, I'm heading back to my room and I feel this excitement to get back to my room and eat. Like it's a thing to do. "I'm going to eat!" It is not a fucking activity, but I treat it as something to do as if it was one.
I end up overeating. I don't feel full at first, and I usually have to remind myself to stop. Usually my stupid fucking brain can't stop before I eat everything. Thankfully, all I keep stocked up is low cal shit, so I end up binging on baby carrots and hummus and strawberries and light cheese wedges and whole wheat tortillas until I'm about to throw up.
My days are extremely busy (I usually stack up my schedule to the brim), so as soon as my brain finds some "free-time," she automatically thinks of it as eating time. I get bored so I have some ice-cream. I don't have anything to do so I have some more. And it goes on. And on. And on. I try to distract myself with Netflix and homework but no. My brain thinks "ALL THIS FREE-TIME WE HAVE IS FOR BINGING!!!"
I'm gonna go fucking insane. I can't fill my nights up with stuff, because I do need to do my schoolwork and have some down time, but I NEED TO STOP EATING SO MUCH DURING MY FREETIME! How the hell do I go about this?? I promised myself to break 150 by the end of this month and I'm struggling to keep 160 one-third of the way into my allotted time.
[Discussion] EDs and suicide?
/u/denimlemonade
Created: Mon Sep 12 18:56:00 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52ht03/eds_and_suicide/
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Do most of you want to kill yourselves / think about suicide a lot? I never used to feel that way, but dealing with all these disordered thoughts is not helping. It's not really that I want to kill myself, just that I don't want to exist anymore. I'm sick of bingeing, I'm sick of being hungry, I'm sick of hiding my food, I'm sick of hating myself every time I look in the mirror. I'm sick of having no friends and no one in real life to talk to about everything. I'm just exhausted and I don't want to be so unhappy anymore.
Also I just want to thank all of you for existing and being part of this incredibly supportive community. You all inspire me to be a better person <3
[Rant/Rave] My Grandmother is in the hospital and has lost so much weight, I feel disgusting for being jealous.
/u/ohwhoaa [5'11"| CW 119.6lbs | GW 115lbs | BMI16.90 | F]
Created: Mon Sep 12 18:03:12 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52hk15/my_grandmother_is_in_the_hospital_and_has_lost_so/
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The thought of eating makes her sick, and I'm jealous. I wish I could have that. I don't even know what normal people think like anymore. Everybody else in my family is obviously sad/upset and of course I want my grandmother to get better, actually I wish I could just take her illness. If I had it Id be able to lose so much weight. I'm kind of rambling and didn't have an exact ending to this thought, but I want to be so sick I can't eat.
[Help] What does everyone use to estimate their calories burned from exercise?
/u/heartbrokenandok [5'7"-ish | 198.4 | 31-ish | -23.4 | F]
Created: Mon Sep 12 17:04:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52ha92/what_does_everyone_use_to_estimate_their_calories/
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I went to the gym today and actually managed to push myself to a decent level (although it sounds pathetic to in shape people, this is major progress for me). Here is what I did:
* walking (3.5mph) for 30 min
* exercise bike, 7.12 mi in 35 min (approx 12mph average over 35 min)
Based on this calculator I burned 656 cal:
https://www.healthstatus.com/perl/calculator.cgi
And the one on sparkpeople says that I burned 614 cal. But that sounds like so many calories! Especially because the stationary bike told me I burned less than 200 cal when I got off.
What do you all use to figure out how much you've burned? Help!
[Rant/Rave] Well I'm a weak little shit
/u/apricaught [5'3.5"| CW 116.8 |LW 114.2| 20.85| -16| F]
Created: Mon Sep 12 16:51:35 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52h7y1/well_im_a_weak_little_shit/
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TW: Discussion of purging.
Background: my main thing used to be bingeing. It's all but stopped from wellbutrin and I've been restricting ok.
To celebrate my "recovery" I decided to participate in a watermelon eating contest. To show myself I could handle large volumes of food without a problem. I thought watermelon must be low calorie since it's mostly, well, water. Plus I thought I'd totally win with my binge experience. Yeah I'm a stupid fuck.
Anyway. The point of the game is to eat a quarter of a watermelon with your hands behind your back. We then did a second round with an eighth each.
I got second and realized just how full I felt. I panickedly looked up the calories and realized I might have eaten 800 fucking calories of watermelon (I thought I had eaten a half and a fourth, now that I think about it. I guess I feel slightly better?) In those 2 minutes. After salad for lunch and a scoop of oatmeal. I panicked. It wasn't worth it for fucking second place. I texted my recovered friend in a last ditch effort to get support but there was no reply (he had class) so I found the bathroom and started trying to purge.
I've never successfully purged. I've only tried 6 times or so. I was trying this time for half an hour, closer than ever. I got up one chunk. One fucking chunk.
I'm so weak. Fuck watermelon. Fuck feeling so hungry but knowing there's no way I can have dinner now. Fuck having a meeting cutting me short.
[Intro] August 2013 vs September 2016
/u/NerdBird49 [5'6" | CW: 136.4 lbs | GW: 130 lbs | UGW: 116 lbs | F | 22.10]
Created: Mon Sep 12 16:15:49 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52h1st/august_2013_vs_september_2016/
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http://imgur.com/QeG819q
[Intro] Greetings from the UK, you pretty things.
/u/eightstone [Height: 5ft 7 | CW: 9st 12lbs| BMI: 21 | Gender: F]
Created: Mon Sep 12 16:13:04 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52h1bk/greetings_from_the_uk_you_pretty_things/
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It's amazing how my weight creeps up on me when I don't check it daily. I was advised by my trainer to not look at the scales while we began her new training regime, and to instead judge my body by how it looks in the mirror, and how strong it feels. Her concern was that I might gain muscle weight and be put off my training by the fear of growing fat. Two months of rigorous exercise and no weight-checking went by. Today curiosity got the better of me... I am a stone heavier than I was before I began working with this trainer. I'm not blaming her. It's my own fault for becoming complacent and for overestimating how many calories I could consume alongside exercise. It's my fault for not sleeping enough and for drinking too much. But today this creeping upwards trajectory must stop. I want to be 8 stone. I have wanted to be eight stone since the day I became conscious that I weighed more than eight stone.
I'd like to kick start this new period of decreasing volume with a three day fast. Once you've completed a 3 day water fast, sticking to a very low daily caloric intake is a comparative piece of (rice)cake.
I made an account here today so that I could be a part of this wonderful, supportive, and slightly weird community. There's nobody in my life who "gets" this obsession. You guys get it. I am so grateful for that.
[Help] Need a meal estimate!!
/u/throwaway03199519 [5'6 | CW 114 | GW 110| 18.47| -22| F]
Created: Mon Sep 12 15:28:28 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52gt4g/need_a_meal_estimate/
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http://i.imgur.com/z3x68nU.jpg
[Discussion] Small portions and soft foods - think this will help the bloated look?
/u/mckenziemudkip [5'2 | CW:109(-21) GW:88 | BMI 20.45| F/20]
Created: Mon Sep 12 15:24:03 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52gs86/small_portions_and_soft_foods_think_this_will/
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I know, lots and lots of water.
But usually, eating any amount of solid food will make me have a food baby no matter what.
I'm thinking about living off of cauliflower mash, faux mustard potato (cauliflower) salad, and sugar free pudding.
I'm wondering if any of you think this will help the bloat look , as long as its paired with plenty of liquids?
[Other] I'm so confused....
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Sep 12 15:15:21 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52gqlq/im_so_confused/
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[deleted]
[Discussion] Just added this page to my Ana journal.
/u/stephanynotstokes [5'5| too fat |-76 lbs | F]
Created: Mon Sep 12 14:52:29 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52gmbd/just_added_this_page_to_my_ana_journal/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/b94399814d1d41e0b15447facc0b286c?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=c96f9e2f3e9500a42b196510ac442160
Just added this to my Ana Journal <3
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Sep 12 14:48:17 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52glhu/just_added_this_to_my_ana_journal_3/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/fa4e27206a3e485f9590b724e4e62df1?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=3e5ac5fb6ea7df7ceae1c6d71e470306
[Help] How to tell a friend?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Sep 12 14:16:55 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52gfhf/how_to_tell_a_friend/
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[deleted]
[Goal] Mini (not weight related) goal!
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Sep 12 14:09:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52gdyu/mini_not_weight_related_goal/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] Eating to maintain sucks :/
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Sep 12 13:45:50 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52g9cw/eating_to_maintain_sucks/
---
[deleted]
[Discussion] Nutrient deficiencies
/u/bearsnbugs
Created: Mon Sep 12 12:23:47 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52ftc2/nutrient_deficiencies/
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I used to severely calorie restrict while running lots (30-50 kms per week) and lifting weights. my knees gave at some point, i'm guessing due to not getting enough nutrients. this happened in december and i still can't run, despite eating "normally" since then.
also, this occurred at the same time as i smoothly transitioned from anorexia to binge eating in a huge episode of slippery-slopey 'i'm already not losing weight, might as well binge'.
how do you all avoid nutrient deficiencies to not fuck up your progress?
[Discussion] IAE just never really hungry or full?
/u/shefadesaway [5'5" |125 lbs | 20.8 | 10 lbs | F ]
Created: Mon Sep 12 11:55:39 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52fnre/iae_just_never_really_hungry_or_full/
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I honestly believe I could just not eat all day and still not feel like eating (but I won't cause health and other lame stuff). Like, I'll only eat out of boredom or because I feel like I have to - my stomach could be growling for hours and I'd be dizzy and not able to think straight, but still, not hungry at all, just mildly inconvenienced. I don't feel any different after I finish a meal, either. It's easy to decline and it's easy to put the fork down, but I never know when exactly I should do that.
And then I'll read about intuitive eating, about how you should only eat when you're hungry and you should be hungry often or else you're a weak fatty, about how to not eat until you're a satisfied, but until you're simply not hungry.
I feel like such a glutton.
[Discussion] Everything social seems to revolve around food. What can I do on dates or with friends that don't involve food?
/u/couldbefatter [5'2" | 109]
Created: Mon Sep 12 11:33:30 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52fjjh/everything_social_seems_to_revolve_around_food/
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I have a new boyfriend, and a new female friend, and every time I hang out with either of them there's food involved. What are some things I can suggest we do that don't involve food?
[Tip] a little list of my current low cal faves.
/u/tinybites [5'6" | sw: 185 | cw: 159.5 | gw: 115]
Created: Mon Sep 12 11:24:11 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52fhry/a_little_list_of_my_current_low_cal_faves/
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http://imgur.com/a/HJRmz
[Help] [help] What the hell?! Ate 1 fucking pound of sugar
/u/copofteashirt
Created: Mon Sep 12 11:05:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52fe9n/help_what_the_hell_ate_1_fucking_pound_of_sugar/
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So this morning I reached my weight goal. Apparently my ED thought was a good reason to treat myself with this obscene amount of sugar in addition to my other meals. What can I do? Fasting will only make me binge more in the end. Should I continue eating "normally"?
Lately I've been binging twice a week, yet I managed to lost a little bit.
[Intro] I'm Here, I Guess...
/u/unbecomingdemeter
Created: Mon Sep 12 11:01:51 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52fdgq/im_here_i_guess/
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I've been lurking for a while, and I suppose it's time I introduce myself (at least a little).
I don't know. I still feel a little out of place. I never had much trouble with food or my body until I was much older. Normal weights, normal habits, until I was 27. Then I had a pregnancy loss. My daughter was stillborn, and it was/is awful. A year later I had another traumatic pregnancy loss. I'm 29 now and feel like my life has completely stalled.
And now I'm just... sad. And anxious. And feeling left behind. And completely at a loss with what to do with this body of mine. Restricting, exercising, and seeing the scale go down seems to be the only thing that keeps the worst of the anxiety at bay. It's not about goals or even about weight, really. I'm sure I'm not the only one who feels compelled to do this simply for the sake of control.
I don't know.
Mostly I just want to say thanks for this community. It's nice to not feel so alone all the time.
[Rant/Rave] broken up with my abusive boyfriend, currently homeless, but I'm down 6lbs in 5 days!
/u/UnrequitedOrgasms [19F | 5'6 | CW:129 | -31 | GW: 105]
Created: Mon Sep 12 10:58:32 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52fcv0/broken_up_with_my_abusive_boyfriend_currently/
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So, on Thursday, I finally, definitively broke up with my abuser who's been sexually and emotionally abusing me since I was 14 (5 years). I feel sick a lot and wonder if I should have stayed, I miss having the level of friendship with someone but that's only because he cut me off from all my friends and stopped me making any in first year? But all my friends have been so supportive and understanding and loving, I really don't need him and I know that.
I moved back to uni (Glasgow) on Saturday, where the place I was all set to move in fucked me over because he asked to pay the 8 weeks of rent at a time (£1,120) in cash and I said I'd rather do bank transfers because it's safer than carrying over a grand of cash with me. He got really aggressive, said someone else was moving into my room and that I couldn't look at any of the others. I've reported him to the uni and the tax people because he was clearly doing dodgy tax shit. I was there, 200 miles from home with all my shit and he left me with nowhere to live. I'm currently staying with relatives in Edinburgh, but I'm kind of screwed for when term starts again, and I'm missing freshers.
It was six months yesterday since my best friend killed herself too, it's just been overall a fucking difficult time for me.
But I've had no appetite and no one telling me to eat, except for the evening, and they don't mind if I don't eat a lot at all. I'm down six pounds and I haven't shat for five days so hopefully when that happens I'll be down even more lol.
I'm crying a lot and quite stressed but I actually feel positive? I can definitely lose 17lbs by Christmas and then just be 10lbs from my UGW. 17lbs in that long is like, really pessimistic, with any luck (not that I have any in Glasgow lol) I'll be at 105 by Christmas!
[Goal] 3 day fast completed!
/u/ForeverEmptyInside [5'9"| CW:119.6 lbs | BMI 17.7 | LW:104lbs | M]
Created: Mon Sep 12 10:54:19 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52fc3i/3_day_fast_completed/
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Hey guys!
As some of you may know, I've been doing some experimenting with fasting ever since I got to university. So far I have completed 2 separate 24 hour fasts, along with one 72 hour fast. In the past (when my anorexia was at it's worst) I completed a one week fast.
For some reason, this new obsession has started where I am counting how many hours I can go fasting without food, instead of obsessing over how few calories I can eat in a day. Don't get me wrong, I still count calories very strictly - I've just been experimenting with the length of fasts as well. It's so much easier psychologically on me to because you don't even have to consider calories at all.
Anyways, enough rambling - Here is the breakdown of my 3 day fast:
**Start of Fast**
**T + 0 hrs: 133 lbs**
- The first 24 hour of a fast is always the hardest in my opinion. Not much to say here, except for you just gotta stick through it.
**T+ 24 hrs: 131.5 lbs**
- After the initial 24 hours it does become a little easier... At about 36 hours in I went to a concert which involved alot of standing. After the concert, I was invited back to a new friends place to have some drinks, but I wanted to stay true to myself. I went, but we ended up just talking and all staying sober.
**T+ 48 hrs: 130 lbs**
- By this point, all hunger stopped really. For me this is normal. I felt a little dizzy and weak at times but nothing out of the ordinary. My guess is that my body was switching into ketosis around this time. I also had a nap that day as I felt more tired than usual.
**T+ 72 hrs: 127 lbs**
- After 72 hours, I ended my fast. Honestly, I felt completely fine (I wasn't even hungry). But I decided it was for the better to go out and try to have a "social meal" (which I seriously struggle with). They say if you can make it to 3 days, you have conquered the hardest part. I probably could have went a couple more days easily.
**After Fast: 128 lbs**
The day after my fast, I ate 1400 calories and weighed in a pound heavier than the day before. I tried not freak out at this, as I knew I would gain some water and food weight back. However thats still a
**5 pound decrease in 3 days**! Hooray!!
[Help] How do you stick to your decisions?
/u/Mi__ra [165cm |50 kg | 18.6 | 0 | F]
Created: Mon Sep 12 10:23:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52f6f0/how_do_you_stick_to_your_decisions/
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I have been eating less and exercising more, but I don't have a clue how to deal with stuff that actually have the biggest effect on my weight - drinking and binging and purging. Every morning I think that today is the day I'll stop drinking, but in the evening I'm like nah, I'll do that tomorrow.
So if you have (had) to do some major changes, how did/do you go about it?
[Rant/Rave] I was binging on half an entire cake when the BF chimes in to say...
/u/gastastic [5'1 | 122 | 26F]
Created: Mon Sep 12 10:20:59 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52f5wt/i_was_binging_on_half_an_entire_cake_when_the_bf/
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"Don't eat tooooo much. I still want you to want to have sex later".
I'm usually super sensitive about my food stuff, but I lost it laughing. I definitely get in a "don't touch me" mode after a binge because I feel absolutely disgusting. And he did such a cute job pointing out how I may feel about myself after, without pointing out the behavior directly. And it made me stop mid-binge. Hooray! Too bad I already felt disgusting. Ah well.
[Help] I'm close to completely ruining today and it's only noon. Advice?
/u/kpatable [5'9" | 124.6 | 18.1/18.4 | -22.4 | F]
Created: Mon Sep 12 10:09:41 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52f3r9/im_close_to_completely_ruining_today_and_its_only/
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I've already 250 calories over my budget, and my budget is 1600. What should I do? Should I fast the rest of the day? Should I just eat really small meals? 250 over isn't *that* bad, especially since my TDEE is probably around somewhere between 1600 and 2000 (still figuring out what it exactly is). But it's so early in the day. And I feel like I can trust neither the voice that's telling me to eat nor the voice that's telling me to fast. I don't know what to do. Help?
[Discussion] Daily Food Diary! September 12, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Mon Sep 12 10:03:05 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52f2ij/daily_food_diary_september_12_2016/
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This is a daily food diary thread for September 12, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
[Intro] Intro and advice for ED during college?
/u/CorgiMuffin3 [5'3" | 118 lb | 20.9 | -14 lb | F]
Created: Mon Sep 12 09:55:32 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52f15f/intro_and_advice_for_ed_during_college/
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Hi all. I've been lurking here for about a month and have decided to finally make an intro post.
I'm turning 19 in about 3 weeks and heading off to college in 1 (!!!). I've had BDD for most of my life; I remember looking in the mirror in second grade and thinking how fat I was. I've always considered myself to be the chubby kid, even though my BMI has always been in the normal range. My parents have always been nuts about food. They're overly controlling and always talking about how great my skinny friends looked.
Freshman year of high school, I lost about 5 lbs but toned up a good deal because of cross country. It was fantastic; all my clothes were baggy and my parents couldn't stop telling me how great I looked. But after the season ended, high school started making my anxiety much worse and I gained it all back (and then some). My self confidence plummeted as my parents started making comments like "Do you really want that second slice of pizza?"
Sophomore year I got down to a low weight of 110 lbs when cross country started, but a knee injury forced me to stop running. I was terrified of putting weight on and started restricting my intake. However, I began binging and purging as school became more stressful. One of my friends convinced me to stop purging, but I still used exercise and restriction as a way to balance out my binges.
Eventually I stopped restricting and through the course of high school, binged my way up to a high weight of 132 lbs. Senior year I went vegan, quit binging, and dropped down to 125. However, I plateaued and started binging again this summer. I've started restricting again; I'm now old enough to buy EC stacks and I can blame my lack of appetite on the fact that I just got my wisdom teeth out. I'm hoping I'll be able to get down to my goal weight of 115 before college starts and my UGW of 105 before winter break. I'm terrified of gaining the freshman 15 but also scared I'll get too wrapped up in ED and do poorly in school. Hopefully I'll be able to find some balance (lol). Any advice on how to manage ED during college would be greatly appreciated :) Thanks!
[Rant/Rave] I messed up yesterday and I need today to be perfect.
/u/goddamnroommate [5'6" | 143.8 | 23.30 | -50ish | F]
Created: Mon Sep 12 09:55:00 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52f11h/i_messed_up_yesterday_and_i_need_today_to_be/
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So I feel as though I've been developing away from certain disordered thoughts (my happiness with my body had been increasing, I was more forgiving of my errors, I was bingeing less, etc). I work at an ice cream store and this means we have not only ice cream around, but also candy, brownies, cookies, cookie dough, etc. It's a nightmare for me and has definitely proved extremely difficult.
Basically, I'd been doing well by hitting 1000-1200 on days i didn't work and 1700-2500 on days i did work. This has basically had me maintaining. But I also work out quite a bit, so i was still seeing basic progress in what fit/what was changing.
Then last night, I had an edible before going to work out (i'd heard some interesting things). No doubt, that was really great. I had really positive moments about how i felt about my body, it felt great swimming, and i would 10/10 recommend. But then, I was like "eat ALL the things". So I got one of those 8" x8" trays of brownie (12oz of brownie) and a cliff bar. So around 2000 on top of what i had at the ice cream store (~800) and what I had had that day as real food (750). All in all, 3550. Not **terrible**, because i would guestimate my TDEE at 2400. But still like a half pound of *real* weight gain.
So now for today. I had been trying to avoid pulling any more fasts, because it does set me into a restrict/binge cycle. But just for today. Tuesday needs to hit 1000. Then I can get back to my shooting for 1000 a day.
sorry for the random thoughts. I needed to get it all written out.
[Discussion] How long can you go without eating?
/u/Kimstephaniejane [5'5" | CW: 116 | GW: 106 | BMI: 19.3 | -18 | F]
Created: Mon Sep 12 09:23:56 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52ev81/how_long_can_you_go_without_eating/
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I can do 96 hours comfortably, and have been able to for a long while. How long can you guys go while still being able to function completely in everyday life? After fasting for this long, how is your first meal? What sort of thing do you eat? :) Good luck guys! Stay strong!
[Goal] Supposed to be in recovery, fasted this weekend
/u/relapseandrecovery
Created: Mon Sep 12 09:19:37 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52euex/supposed_to_be_in_recovery_fasted_this_weekend/
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I gained 10 pounds from the weight I was at when I started recovery and a total of 25 from my lowest weight to my highest. As you can imagine, I don't love this. Normally, I do a pretty good job of stopping ED thoughts but I have slip ups. This weekend was a big one.
I ate a pretty big lunch on Friday at noon so that night I was fine skipping dinner. Then I woke up and wasn't too hungry on Saturday so I kept going. It hit 24 hours and I was feeling good. At about 4pm on Saturday I was getting hungry and it was hard to focus on my homework. I was too scared to drink even water because I didn't want to get water weight. I decided I'd wait until midnight, 36 hours, to drink a protein shake. 240 calories and then I fell asleep. I woke up full and kept at it. I was waiting for dinner on Sunday to eat. I was getting hungrier in the afternoon because I had to do some lifting doing laundry but I wanted to make it to 56 hours. When it was finally 8pm, I had a huge dinner. Probably not enough calories for the weekend but enough for the day. That was kinda lame but I'm not too ashamed and it wasn't a binge.
I couldn't even weigh to see how much it helped though but at least my stomach was flatter. If I had to guess I believe I got back down to maybe 98 which would be nice.
Idk I just felt like I can only share it here because it's slightly an accomplishment for me even though it was unhealthy. I know starving yourself is unhealthy duh. I'm just proud I could do it for so long. Even in my ED I wasn't a big faster, usually just kept low calories all day. 56 hours is a record for me and I'm supposed to be in recovery :p
[Tip] Huge recipes and product dump!!!!
/u/Nude-prude [5"6.5 | 103.4 lbls | 16.42|-40| female]
Created: Mon Sep 12 09:14:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52etjc/huge_recipes_and_product_dump/
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http://imgur.com/a/SS6Pm
[Rant/Rave] Overly Paranoid Girlfriend Problems are Ruining My Life!
/u/mild-rose [5'11 | 143.8 |19.42 | not enough | f]
Created: Mon Sep 12 08:51:11 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52ep7c/overly_paranoid_girlfriend_problems_are_ruining/
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My friend was repeating a discussion between her boyfriend and my boyfriend, in which her boyfriend was ranting about so called "twig bitches" and how much he disliked the body type.
In this conversation my boyfriend casually goes "I actually prefer twig bitches."
And this single comment has made my life fucking hell.
I obsess over whether or not I'm his ideal body type, and I'm worried that he's not as attracted to me as he possibly could be.
I mean I know he finds me physically attracted, and his last girlfriend was fairly overweight, but...
I wish I was a twig bitch too.
[Rant/Rave] I didn't binge for the last few weeks. It was a "surprise bulk".
/u/smokesanddietcokes [Doesn't actually know what she's talking about.]
Created: Mon Sep 12 08:36:12 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52emi7/i_didnt_binge_for_the_last_few_weeks_it_was_a/
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That's my story and I'm sticking to it.
... :( Hahaha. Oh dear.
Although I can't help but wonder if I gained any muscle during these 'oops' weeks. Will I look better after some fat loss if I aim to maintain muscle? Leaner? I kept up the lifting, although I know muscle can't build that fast even if you eat loads..
Also, can water retention effect the way you look too? I am pretty distraught how flabby and puffed out I look, and the thought that it's all the extra fat. Can extra water from binging on shit effect limbs too? My arms arn't vascular any more, not even in heat, and that's *killing me*. Pls come back veins..
Don't know if I'm actually asking or just rambling my thoughts, but input is welcome!
:'( Fatty.
[Help] ABC diet and exercise?
/u/EternallyInProgress [5'3" | 118 | 21.5 | 0 | F]
Created: Mon Sep 12 07:07:15 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52e8er/abc_diet_and_exercise/
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Hi everyone, longtime lurker/former user of this sub.
For a long time now, I've been running 4-5 miles every day. When I went to the doctor, he told me that my knees were getting worn down too quickly and that I should stop or ease up on the running.
The problem is that I've been running desperately to lose my weight, and eating 7-800 calories every day. I'm scared that I'll gain back my fat if I keep eating this way, and so I decided to do the ABC diet instead.
I'm currently on day 3, and I'm debating if I should still exercise a bit instead of cutting it entirely out of my life. Would doing the ABC diet get in the way of my exercise? Should I do something else? Thank you!
[Rant/Rave] What am I doing wrong?
/u/isolatedintrovert [155cm | CW: 46kg | GW: 41 | UGW: 38 | 19.93 | F]
Created: Mon Sep 12 07:00:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52e7ev/what_am_i_doing_wrong/
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I feel like I'm on the verge of a breakdown. Food is not my only weakness. I've got a lot of mental issues, if we really want to get down to it, but I feel like this is going to push me over the edge.
I've been trying to do this the "right/healthy" way... but I feel like my body image is just getting worse with each day that the "right" way doesn't bring results. I want *so badly* to be able to fast. To stop eating entirely. My husband is too aware of my self-destructive tendencies and won't let me.
Plus, I'm the breadwinner for our family, so I have to be "healthy" to continue making the money we need to pay bills/survive. Sometimes I wish for the days at my old job, where barely anyone paid any attention to me, much less what I ate - in fact, they probably preferred it if I didn't due to "increased productivity." But at my current job (which I otherwise love, love, love) I have to eat with my coworkers, and they'll certainly call foul if I stop eating lunch entirely.
But it's a job where I have to stand/pace the majority of the day. According to my calculations, I should be burning more than 75 Calories for every hour of stationary standing (which I don't stand in one place). So I track that. As I feel it's better to underestimate Calorie burn than to overestimate and end up eating too much as a result. So, I generally burn 300+ Calories from simply standing. Then I walk to work. I try to walk briskly, and am often walking much more quickly than those around me, but still I try to underestimate my speed + time. Usually at least 100 Calories burned by walking every day. (My fitness app on my phone often calculates a higher Caloric burn, but - again - I prefer to underestimate.)
I often try to do a short arm or ab routine each night, too, since I'm probably more "skinny fat" than anything. (God, I just feel and LOOK so fucking fat.) I don't bother counting the Calories burned for it, as they're negligible compared to other methods, but I know I'm burning something. I've increased my water intake by at least double to try to get rid of water weight, as advised by /u/Glitter_Cunt , I believe.
I finally caved and calculated my BMR today, too, just in case that was holding me back. It's about 1258 Calories a day. I have MFP set at the "healthy/right" level to lose 1kg per week, so it has my goal set at 1200 Calories a day. I usually come in between 1100 - 1200 (which has me feeling sick to admit it's so high) consumed per day BEFORE factoring in my Calories out (I definitely don't record my BMR).
My first post here was talking about how the needle on the scale hadn't moved. Well, it *still* hasn't. I'm playing by the book. I'm doing everything the "right" way, but there is no improvement. I'm so lost as to what else I can do. I'm sure my period (sorry for the tmi) isn't helping, but it's only been happening for a week. What about all the time *before* it. I just can't take this, guys.
I'm so jealous of those of you who can water fast. I even find myself jealous of those who binge. I know that's supposedly not a "healthy" way to think, and maybe I'm not really qualified to be in this subreddit anyway, since I'm not losing OR gaining. I'm not bingeing OR restricting. I'm sorry. I shouldn't be posting here. I don't belong here. Let me know if I should delete this...
I underestimated the power of coffee.
/u/fishysandwich [5'3.5 | 120 | -25 | F]
Created: Mon Sep 12 06:39:25 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52e4gw/i_underestimated_the_power_of_coffee/
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I'm usually a one or two cup a day drinker, and it helps me with restricting, but two days ago ALL i had was coffee. Granted, some of them were pumpkin spice lattes from starbucks (with skim and half the syrup, of course), but my calories for the day were just about 600. I had like 6 servings of coffee and didn't feel any hunger or urge to eat all day. It was awesome.
The only downside? The anxiety you get from SO MUCH CAFFEINE. I started stress crying a lot. Worth it? Maybe?
[Discussion] Oh my god Cosmo (from their article the "10 very best reasons to break up")
/u/citrus_cunt [5' 9"| 139lbs | 19.5| +2lbs | F]
Created: Mon Sep 12 06:34:06 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52e3qp/oh_my_god_cosmo_from_their_article_the_10_very/
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http://imgur.com/n89Uc6z
[Help] Great start to my morning
/u/heartbrokenandok [5'7"-ish | 198.4 | 31-ish | -23.4 | F]
Created: Mon Sep 12 06:27:24 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52e2p2/great_start_to_my_morning/
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I forgot my carefully planned breastfast and lunch. And I can't even replace it exactly from the store near work because the last thing I need is the grocery clerk judging me for buying a single toddler lunch for an adult human being.
Arg! These were also the only parts of my day that I wrote in pen into my food diary. I didn't write dinner yet because I didn't want it to change and fuck up my diary entry. But here we are!
Tips for high protein lunch suggestions that will net me no more than 140 cal and hopefully include some veggies?
[Discussion] Weekly Stats Update! September 12, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Mon Sep 12 06:03:35 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52dz9j/weekly_stats_update_september_12_2016/
---
This is the weekly status thread for September 12, 2016.
The weekly status thread is to help motivate our users, and to eventually see how far they've come! Be it for weight loss, weight gain, or maintaining- everyone is welcome. Previous updates are archived [here.](http://www.reddit.com/r/proED/wiki/archives)
Please include the following information (with all necessary units of measurement):
* Height:
* Current weight (CW):
* Highest weight (HW):
* Lowest weight (LW):
* Goal weight (GW):
* Ultimate goal weight (UGW):
* Weight lost (WL):
* BMI: ([Use this to calculate your BMI](https://people.maths.ox.ac.uk/trefethen/bmi_calc.html))
* Age:
* Gender expression:
Here's a handy-dandy copy/paste of the above format:
* Height:
* CW:
* HW:
* LW:
* GW:
* UGW:
* WL:
* BMI:
* Age:
* Gender expression:
*****
Status threads are posted every Monday.
Have any questions or concerns? Comment below, or [PM the mods.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FproED)
I need accountability, so here's a personal rant
/u/CoconutTime
Created: Mon Sep 12 05:16:33 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52dtj2/i_need_accountability_so_heres_a_personal_rant/
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[removed]
[Discussion] What do you think the average skinny celebrity's relationship with food is like?
/u/kpatable [5'9" | 124.6 | 18.1/18.4 | -22.4 | F]
Created: Mon Sep 12 03:21:21 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52dhc5/what_do_you_think_the_average_skinny_celebritys/
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I can't help but think they have a hired health person that motivates them to always be hungry and exhausted from exercise.
[Help] [Help] I can't stop binging on junk.
/u/idkjust [5'9" | 130.6lbs | 19.29 | -15 | F]
Created: Mon Sep 12 00:49:49 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52d2dl/help_i_cant_stop_binging_on_junk/
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I usually do pretty well with cutting down on calories and not eating much. But whenever I do cave in and say, "I just NEED to eat something," I end up thinking *I'm caving anyway, may as well be something I'm really going to enjoy*
I wish I could just snack on celery or something, but I have such a sweet tooth.
[Rant/Rave] Panic Attack or I Changed My Mind
/u/Alexa1p [5'5'' | 110 | 18 | -10.7 | F]
Created: Mon Sep 12 00:27:51 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52d04i/panic_attack_or_i_changed_my_mind/
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Weighed 108, went to the doctor a week ago, told I'd get osteoporosis when I'm 40 if I don't gain weight. Decided to make a change, ate 300-500 calories over maintenance every day for the past week. I've been strength training, and hoping I can turn most of the calories into fat.
I now weigh 112.5, I just binged like 800 calories over despite eating at a surplus for the past week, my stomach feels so fat and gross and I don't think I can do this. :'( I was actually almost happy weighing 108, this isn't worth it.
[Rant/Rave] High and/or late night binge
/u/rillivity
Created: Mon Sep 12 00:13:04 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52cym8/high_andor_late_night_binge/
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Okay so I take sleeping pills to sleep and smoke pot but I tend to want to binge so badly. I know we all suffer from this I'm different ways but at two in the morning it's so hard to have clear thinking with an asleep brain.
For awhile I was using massive amounts of grapes but winter is coming and where I am fresh food that's low calorie Becomes rare. I have no clue what to do as the grocery stores are slowly getting crappy produce 😰 anyone have any thoughts on that one?
I have no freaking clue what I'm going to do all winter. Last year I just binged on easy to purge foods and got rid of them while I'm still in zombie mode (basically a half assed purge) and I was gaining weight around a pound a week 😱 it was terrible
But I have to take the sleeping pills to sleep and can't help the munchies they give me. Someone out there must have some tips or even deal with it themselves.
~stay strong everyone!
[Discussion] My body is confusing sometimes...
/u/TiredOfBeingFat_ [6'0"| CW251 |BMI34 | 22lost | GW130]
Created: Mon Sep 12 00:06:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52cxza/my_body_is_confusing_sometimes/
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I'm still so obese, and I have rolls on top of rolls; Though I can see most of my collar bones pretty clearly. That's the only place I've even noticed weight loss is my collar bone area even though I'm finally getting to small for my size 22 pants... I don't know why that's the only place I notice it. Or why i'm seeing them at all while still so heavy. Anybody else feel this way about certain parts of their body?
[Rant/Rave] DAE get excited when they have food poisoning?
/u/bchuk183 [5'6 | 136 | -12lbs | F]
Created: Sun Sep 11 23:41:56 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52cv7d/dae_get_excited_when_they_have_food_poisoning/
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I've been living in the Middle East for the past few years and I get food poisoning about 3 times a year. It's usually pretty miserable and lasts about 3-4 days. I spent yesterday with diarrhea and vomiting. My boyfriend was wonderful and took care of me. I lost 2 pounds! It's annoying that it's during my week off but at least I have an excuse now for why I'm not eating a lot.
[Intro] Well, they weren't really supposed to give it to me...
/u/CETERIS_PARABOLA
Created: Sun Sep 11 22:48:16 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52cp2n/well_they_werent_really_supposed_to_give_it_to_me/
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I'm on phentermine. Yep, phentermine. Or as I like to call it: magic.
I'm bipolar type 2, often toting around a veritable suitcase of pills. This one enhances weight loss! This one too! Wait. Okay, you spiraled out of control and had to take that for a week? Gain 15 pounds instantly. Oh, and this one? The one that keeps you alive more than any of the others? Yeah, that's going to pack 'em on if you don't watch out.
My BMI technically doesn't fall within the ethically prescribeable category but under the watchful eye of a dual certified psychiatrist/addictionologist with a completed residency in internal medicine? If he's willing to write it I'll pop it with the others. We went for it. In two weeks I lost 14 pounds. It's been a month at this point and I have my next weigh in soon. Shrink is happy for me, as weight issues are just an added burden beyond more pressing problems, and I can't complain about a drug that has enabled me to go a least two days with zero food. Zero. *Zero.* For once I don't want it, it makes me sick to think of eating and often enough when I do there's no way I can keep it down. It's not purging if it's out of your control is my way of looking at it.
The calories though. The calories. There's 90 in a shot of my preferred whiskey and, full disclosure, I'm in Milwaukee! By the DSM the majority of our constituents meet the criteria for alcoholism or chronic binge drinking. A night isn't two whiskey waters and call it a day. A night is four doubles and maybe a few shots from the generous bartender. The. Calories. But at least the alcohol isn't competing with anything in my body but water and an occasional bottle of Soylent.
So I'm basically an alcoholic on speed with a natural inclination to instability. We're gonna have so much fun.
[Tip] Ginger and lemon tea for hunger pains and nausea
/u/tinylunacat [165cm|60kg|GW:45kg| Female]
Created: Sun Sep 11 22:06:21 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52cjzt/ginger_and_lemon_tea_for_hunger_pains_and_nausea/
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This is probably well known here already but I just discovered it while in detox and it's so tasty and great for hunger pains! I use 1-2tsp grated fresh ginger, the juice of half a lemon and the zest, and steep for 5 minutes, and add honey to the cup. It's lovely :)
[Help] Questions about Nicotene
/u/winterpopp [ 5'7" | GW: <100 | F22]
Created: Sun Sep 11 21:55:13 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52cigj/questions_about_nicotene/
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Hey there. I lurk here a lot but decided to make an account finally. I don't know if I should say anything about myself since I've never posted before but I'm awkward af so I dunno.
I was just wondering if anyone else uses nicotene gum(like the 'quit smoking' gum) here. I love it for the energy/mood boost it gives me, and of course the biggest reason, it's a GREAT appetite suppressant.
I've never met anyone else that chews nicotene gum and doesn't or has never smoked, anybody I've ever mentioned it to looks at me like I'm crazy. Do any of you?
I often wonder why it isn't a bigger thing, it has all the perks of smoking without downsides as far as I know, and that's why I wanted to post this to ask. Do you guys know if there are any downsides to nicotene gum? Everything I look up just says "don't do it" about why it's bad, and doesn't really explain why. I've seen people have crazy side effects like hair loss, but that was when they had the equivalent to a super high number like 80MG (gum only comes in 2 and 4 MG)a day. Also it says on the side of the package to not use it for more than like 12 weeks, but doesn't explain why. I'm so confused.
I've tried to post on dieting forums and stuff to ask this, and just got freaked out on basically. Thank you guys for any help >.<
[Goal] [Goal] Between pole dancing and restricting, I am finally happy with my legs for the first time in my life
/u/Rapunzelindreamland
Created: Sun Sep 11 21:38:07 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52cg2y/goal_between_pole_dancing_and_restricting_i_am/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/8c27e9a8d1bf4325a96077023946383f?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=3c705493a436ffa5e74aac5e98c08301
[Meme/Humor] When my friend tells me I need to eat at least 2000 calories to maintain
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Sep 11 19:07:16 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52bsnj/when_my_friend_tells_me_i_need_to_eat_at_least/
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https://media.giphy.com/media/Fml0fgAxVx1eM/giphy.gif
[Goal] Completed my first full-day fast!
/u/stephxxi [5'3 | CW: 132.8 lbs | BMI: 23.09 | -37.2 lbs | f]
Created: Sun Sep 11 18:16:26 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52bknd/completed_my_first_fullday_fast/
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I know this may sound like nothing to those of you who do fasts that last days or even weeks but I've finally completed a full-day fast! To be exact, I actually fasted for 25hrs. My ED has been around for a few years now, but this is the first time I've actually been able to do a complete, legit fast, and I'm really proud of myself. After a horrible b/p cycle recently, I guess something in me finally snapped and just said "ENOUGH ALREADY" haha. I think I would've been able to continue on for a bit more, but in the last hour of my fast, I started to suddenly feel hot and dizzy so I had to finally break it and eat something. I think it was due to all the unexpected walking and standing I had to do at the grocery store. Surprisingly enough, I didn't feel as miserable as I thought I would during my fast. The only negative feelings I experienced were the total lack of motivation and concentration. I wasn't able to get a *single* thing done for school. With that aside, my overall fasting experience was pretty good! I think I'll try to do at least one more fast before the end of the week and see if I can go for longer (and hopefully avoid any dizziness). This time I'll be more prepared. I bought some vitamin water zero to keep my electrolytes balanced and I'll be sure to drink some coffee for extra energy.
p.s. this is my very first post on here! :) (I should really get around to making an Introduction post lol...)
[Rant/Rave] Went couponing with my friend and it was actually super distressing.
/u/Missy_Is_Bitter [5'3"| 183.4.0 | -32lbs | F]
Created: Sun Sep 11 18:12:07 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52bjxy/went_couponing_with_my_friend_and_it_was_actually/
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No flair cause mobile.
She bought 30 fucking jars of ragu because she had a to. Of dollar off coupons and could ad match them with a store that had them for $.99.
30. Fucking. Jars. Of. Pasta. Sauce.
The entire shopping cart was full of them. And a few other things she had coupons for.
And it was super cool because it totally appeals to my inner cheap bitch because she got them for pretty much free. But at the same time being seen pushing a shopping cart with that much food was kind of horrifying for me. Rationally I know no one at Walmart was looking at our cart, and it's not like I'm even close to being the largest person shopping there, but still. I hate being seen with huge quantities of food. I hate being seen with any food. When shopping on my own I will wait to go down aisles of the things I need until there are no people in the aisle, and if someone comes down the aisle before I have selected my item I will leave and either wait until they're done or I am just not getting that item. I don't put more than a few things in my cart in a time, and I have to use the self checkout with the machine on mute. Shopping has gotten significantly harder over the last few months because my disordered shopping habits have gotten way worse.
She's also sending me home with a ton of jars of pasta sauce and popcorn and other things. Which is incredibly nice of her and I am so grateful because I am poor as dicks and this means that my fiancé and I don't have to buy some stuff for a while, but having things like Alfredo sauce in the house is going to be kind of stressful. Pasta is a huge fear food for me because I will binge on it like crazy. I can use the red sauce in tiny tiny increments I suppose over zucchini and spaghetti sauce, but having so much sauce is going to mean that my fiancé is going to want to buy pasta and I don't think I will be able to handle that much pasta just STARING AT ME FROM ACROSS THE ROOM.
And I can't at all say anything about this without making it even more obvious to everyone how totally fucked up I am right now. I think they're all starting to suspect me.
Sorry for the rant, guys. I'm just stressed as balls over this. I love my friends but if they could all stop feeding me that would be great. :D
[Goal] Gonna try and set a new "record" for fasting!
/u/peanutbutteredbanana
Created: Sun Sep 11 18:03:21 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52biih/gonna_try_and_set_a_new_record_for_fasting/
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The longest I've ever fasted was a little over 40 hours. I'm hoping to get to at least 60 hours! I'm mostly posting this to hold myself accountable so I don't give up early tbh :P. Wish me luck!
[Other] [Other] tomorrow marks the start of my new life..
/u/leatherhoff [5"3 | 116lb | 21.2 | FTM]
Created: Sun Sep 11 17:06:50 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52b9h6/other_tomorrow_marks_the_start_of_my_new_life/
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..By which I mean, tomorrow is when I go back to college and will hopefully be able to get back into a proper routine of starving/restricting. This summer has been awful awful Awful and I realised yesterday just how positively disgusting my body looks, but once I get back to going to class/work most days I should be able to get back into a good routine. I really want to reach my ugw or at least make some sort of noticeable progress by my 18th birthday in December and I found some calculator online yesterday that said if I wanted to do that I'd need to eat like 600cal or less a day which might be a challenge given how easily I give in to binges :( however I'm super hyped to be able to get back into a routine!!! I've been working on a little notebook type thing like some of the things posted here recently, I've only done some of it but tomorrow morning I'll weigh myself and that'll be my new starting weight to write down and work from. Its messed up to say I'm excited to starve myself but I miss the feeling of power that comes from fasting, I want to feel like I can have control over this!!!! And I can!!!! I will!!!! It'll be so worth it. I can do this. I can do this. I started typing this just before midnight and now its after midnight so I guess my new start begins today :)
(Also sorry for the wall of text, I'm on mobile and can't format it properly hahaha)
[Rant/Rave] I lost control too long ago and now I have to get it back.
/u/russianfrank
Created: Sun Sep 11 16:31:31 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52b3t4/i_lost_control_too_long_ago_and_now_i_have_to_get/
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According to Losertown, in 3 weeks time, I was supposed to be my goal weight. I was supposed to be small and pretty for the wedding, but instead I ate. I ate like every meal was my last meal. I even started going to the gym, but my eating brought me back to the starting point. I kept on telling myself that I will get back on track tomorrow but that tomorrow never came.
Well, I'm making this post today mostly for myself, but today I'm taking my life back into my hands and taking control of my eating. Starting today, I'm fasting and heavily restricting to finally get ahold of my binges. 👍
Wish me luck, guys. Hopefully I will stick to it and in no time I'll be 99 pounds.
[Other] "Ma'am, are you okay?"
/u/littleone91011 [5'4" | 103 | 17.6 | F |]
Created: Sun Sep 11 16:23:59 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52b2ht/maam_are_you_okay/
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[Trigger warning, purging]
Years of having an eating disorder has caused me to become very skilled at purging discreetly and tidily in public restrooms. Yesterday afternoon I was in a stall of a public restroom I thought I had all to myself.
A young woman walked in at the exact wrong time. Normally I can purge with others surrounding me very quietly, but thinking the restroom was empty, I wasn't as cautious as I usually am. By the time I heard her enter, it was very obvious that I was vomiting due to the sounds emitting from my stall.
I stopped for a minute, and began to resume more quietly, when she said something that made me freeze.
"Ma'am, are you okay?"
I couldn't move. Normally in awkward situations like this the person in the stall over will just ignore me, or not notice. I've never been confronted like that before.
She couldn't see me, which is good because I'm a terrible liar, so I made up something about being pregnant and having morning sickness that lasts "into the afternoon."
"Oh no, I'm sorry," she said. I have no idea if she bought it, or had even suspected anything unseemly in the first place.
I waited until she finished washing her hands and began to resume, when I heard her stop in front of my stall.
"I brought you some wet paper towels," she said. All I could do was reach over the stall, take them, and sputter out a thank you.
For awhile I just stood there, marveling at the simple kindness she had paid me. I was floored.
In that moment, weak and vulnerable, I was so moved by that woman and that sopping handful of paper towels that I began to weep, right there in the stall. For her kindness, and for myself, and how pathetic I must have seemed. For how I wasn't okay.
Then I finished the job, wiped up, and left the building.
[Tip] Exercise Definitions
/u/heartbrokenandok [5'7"-ish | 198.4 | 31-ish | -23.4 | F]
Created: Sun Sep 11 16:17:10 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52b1db/exercise_definitions/
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So I've been trying for a few days now to figure out what the hell losertown means when they say "Moderate Exercise 3-5 times a week". Like what is moderate exercise? How long should you be exercising during those 3-5 times a week sessions?
Well, today I found a couple links that I think are really helpful! The first one describes what a medical professional would consider "moderate exercise" and the second gives some really good calorie estimates for a bunch of common exercises! I feel like I can actually achieve what losertown tells me is possible now!
oh, and here are the links:
https://health.clevelandclinic.org/2015/04/what-does-moderate-exercise-mean-anyway/
http://www.heart.org/HEARTORG/HealthyLiving/PhysicalActivity/FitnessBasics/Moderate-to-Vigorous---What-is-your-level-of-intensity_UCM_463775_Article.jsp#.V9XWJLgrJhE
[Help] Question about swelling (and intro I guess
/u/ghostrice [5'6 | 27/F | SW: 280lbs - CW: 178lbs - GW: 140lbs]
Created: Sun Sep 11 15:48:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52awfj/question_about_swelling_and_intro_i_guess/
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This is my first actual post so Hii. I'm 27/F stats in my flair, I'm mostly bulimic technically, since age 14, but have been restricting for the past 2 years. I'm currently allowing 600cals max to sit in me. I b/p still but not more than once a week. Laxative addict as well when I do binge/purge I am so scared of anything being left I take laxatives. Anything else?
So long story short I fell and damaged myself badly. Small fracture (thanks to crappy bone density woo...) and I've swollen like mad. Basically I am up 7lbs since then and I am crazy scared that's because I'm a fat ass. What happens when you are swollen due to injury? It's a nasty break and has added 5 inches to the area I broke. Could this cause the weight gain?
I feel so horrible about this I'm just not going to eat for the next few days.
[Rant/Rave] Oh God I ate ALL the food
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Sep 11 15:44:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52avua/oh_god_i_ate_all_the_food/
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[deleted]
[Meme/Humor] [Fluff] John Green knows where it's at (said at 5:45)
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Sep 11 15:42:03 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52avdi/fluff_john_green_knows_where_its_at_said_at_545/
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https://youtu.be/6E9WU9TGrec?t=5m34s
[Rant/Rave] i just weighed myself for the first time in three years
/u/4inthemourning
Created: Sun Sep 11 15:34:39 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52au1w/i_just_weighed_myself_for_the_first_time_in_three/
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i relapsed. i thought i hated myself more then, but this is the absolute highest weight that i've ever seen on myself. i didn't think it was actually that bad, because i don't look like what the scale said. at least, i didn't think so. but now all i can see is fat, all i can feel is how heavy i am, i can hear how loud i am when i stomp around the house. it's so, so embarrassing, and it was a slap of reality. it made sense, and i understand now why my boyfriend won't take my shirt off anymore, too.
i wish i could go back and stay how i was before. i used to be so little, and i was beautiful, and i got attention. now im just full of hatred.
[Discussion] Has anyone else been to waldenfarms website?
/u/thirdocean
Created: Sun Sep 11 14:34:34 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52aj5q/has_anyone_else_been_to_waldenfarms_website/
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Everything is 0 cal. There's pancake syrup, peanut butters, mayo, salad dressing. I ordered marshmallow fluff. Has anyone tried it? Mine comes Tuesday. I'm excited but scared it'll be gross.
[Help] Need help/advice
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Sep 11 14:17:22 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52ag25/need_helpadvice/
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[removed]
[Help] whole foods uk?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Sep 11 14:06:49 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52ae61/whole_foods_uk/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] I'm so fat
/u/princessxpixie [5"4.5 | 104lbs | 17.5 | -29lbs | Female]
Created: Sun Sep 11 13:51:41 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52abfe/im_so_fat/
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I don't know what to do. I've been binging for about a month probably more, it's disgusting. I'm eating around 1500-2000 calories a day. I've gained so much weight, I'm now 1 pound of 8 stone.
I feel so fat and I'm so disgusted in myself yet every morning I gorge my face on food. I'm so stuck it's like I've lost all my motivation and drive. I feel so pathetic and weak and I avoided weighing myself for so long and have to wear baggy clothes to hide my disgusting fatness.
Has anybody got stuck in a rut like this and how did you get out of it? I honestly don't know what to do. Even today I ate a chocolate bar with 1000 calories and half a pizza. Just looking for any helpful tips to get me back on track again :(
[Discussion] DAE love horror movies ?
/u/mandarinexd [5'3" | CW:99 | BMI:17.74 | - 11 lbs | F]
Created: Sun Sep 11 13:46:19 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52aaeg/dae_love_horror_movies/
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I'm a huge movie fan, especially horror / thriller ones ! It's also good to watch during fasts or to avoid a binge /mindless eating beacuse good movies of this genre really grasp your full attention , and its sometimes gross enough to cut your appetite .
( MOREOVER it's so ridiculous I heard somewhere feeling afraid burn more calories ,ahha i know it's probably bullshit but hey I love this idea.)
Being a 21 years old girl I feel usually very alone when I say I like horror stuff, like people look at me with dubious eyes, probably thinking I drink bats blood at night and that I got a pet mouse called Dark Belzebuth.
[Discussion] DAE have Vivid Dreams with ECA Stack?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Sep 11 13:41:15 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52a9gw/dae_have_vivid_dreams_with_eca_stack/
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[deleted]
[Help] website that tells me how much cal I'm allowed to reach a goal within a set timeframe?
/u/ED2134 [168cm | fat | female| -6kg]
Created: Sun Sep 11 13:30:59 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52a7l3/website_that_tells_me_how_much_cal_im_allowed_to/
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I know I have seen this here before, but i can't find the post.
I'm looking for a website which lets me set a date and an amount of kg/lbs I want to loose within that timeframe and gives me the calories I'm allowed to eat.
Can anybody help?
[Rant/Rave] Boyfriend told me he doesn't think I can lose 20 lbs by halloween
/u/pungentthrowaway [5'1" | CW: 154 | -13 | F]
Created: Sun Sep 11 13:14:38 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52a4p0/boyfriend_told_me_he_doesnt_think_i_can_lose_20/
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I got kind of drunk yesterday and asked him if he thought I could. I have a wedding to go to really close to then and naturally I bought dresses that don't even come close to fitting me right now because I'm logical. He said no, that's a lot of weight. I said I have a lot extra. We didn't really talk too much about it but he said he'd help me try. I actually feel super motivated right now. Coincidentally I woke up today in terrible pain and I'm like 90% sure I'm going to have to have a wisdom tooth out. I can't eat today. I probably won't be able to eat tomorrow. I'm totally gonna lose 20 lbs by Halloween.
Oh yeah and I have been put on antibiotics so I can't drink for at least 10 days. My ED is really helping me see the bright side of this incredible pain I am in right now hahaha
Thin always wins 😏
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Sep 11 12:53:48 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52a0v3/thin_always_wins/
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[deleted]
[Goal] Omg! 110.8
/u/mckenziemudkip [5'2 | CW:109(-21) GW:88 | BMI 20.45| F/20]
Created: Sun Sep 11 12:39:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/529ybr/omg_1108/
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I'm pretty pleased after having such a shit month of August. Sky rocketing back to almost 117lbs. I have two more weeks to lose before my cousin's wedding, so I'm thinking I can come in at least 105lbs c:
Do you guys think 100 lbs is possible?
(Also, LOL at me trying a liquid fast. It didn't happen)
[Help] How much weight can you lose in 2 weeks?
/u/Vanilla_Mieux [5'1 | GW: 65 | F]
Created: Sun Sep 11 12:39:43 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/529yad/how_much_weight_can_you_lose_in_2_weeks/
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So this is something I'm curious about.
It's worth noting that I've been stuck in a vicious binge-purge cycle, and we're talking literally eating non-stop every waking moment. If I went from that to heavily restricting-fasting, how much will I lose in two weeks?
I really want to go back to my old, 65lbs self. Eating isn't worth it, really.
Go to low cal snacks?
/u/passthetablemanners [5'2 | 130 | 23.7 | -15 | 21F]
Created: Sun Sep 11 12:10:25 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/529sxp/go_to_low_cal_snacks/
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***On phone so can't flair! Sorry!***
Hi guys, not exactly ED related but I was looking for some low calorie (<150), tasty snack bars or other snacks that are your go to when you need something satisfying but guilt free? Preferrably ones you can buy online. Thank you!
[Rant/Rave] I'm a terrible person
/u/heartbrokenandok [5'7"-ish | 198.4 | 31-ish | -23.4 | F]
Created: Sun Sep 11 11:58:05 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/529qok/im_a_terrible_person/
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I have an older sister who has always been heavier than me. It is something that I have always taken pride in. That I was thinner, and slightly taller, with smaller feet. She had more friends than me, she got a boyfriend before me, but I was thinner. I always had that. So when I started gaining weight, I was always terrified of her being thinner than me. Yet somehow despite the fact that she claims to go to the gym more than me and is always on some sort of diet (that somehow allows cake and bread and chips and onion dip) she is still heavier than me.
However, last time I talked to her about it, she tried to claim that she wore smaller pants than me despite being 30lbs heavier. And it freaked me out. Like WTF you can't be *smaller* than me AND fatter than me! that's impossible. But she lives in another state so I couldn't confirm whether it was true.
Well, today I just saw a video of her on facebook and she is SO MUCH FATTER than I am. And I am so excited! I just crossed a major weightloss milestone and she looks like she has gained even more weight since I last saw her. I mean THAT'S TERRIBLE! I should not be wishing for my sister to gain weight so that I'll be even thinner and therefore better! I should want her to lose weight and be healthy.
What is wrong with me!?
[Discussion] Restricting days and higher calorie days
/u/concuidado [4'11 | 84 lbs | 18.02 | -61| F]
Created: Sun Sep 11 11:42:16 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/529nrq/restricting_days_and_higher_calorie_days/
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I am no where near my UGW but I want to up my calories because I feel I don't need to restrict as heavy anymore (I've been eating 100-400 for the past 4 months) and I eventually want to work my way up to maintaining at 800 calories once I reach my UGW. I eat around 240-500 a day to an average of 370 per week right now and I am trying to increase the daily average by 5-10 calories each week (i know it's very little). I have one high calorie day (500) and one low calorie day (240) and the rest vary to average out to that 370 calories per day.
I was wondering if you guys have a plan of one high cal and one low cal day as part of your schedule. Is 240 too high for a low cal day? To those maintaining, do you still do any fasting/restricting days?
How do you guys plan out your calories?
[Discussion] Restricting vs Fasting?
/u/foodfornot [5'3" | 120lbs | BMI 21.3 | -20 | GW 105 | F]
Created: Sun Sep 11 11:26:10 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/529kuw/restricting_vs_fasting/
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I just read [this article](https://www.lifebox.diet/blogs/life-pineapples/how-to-fast-ultimate-guide-for-beginners) on the benefits of fasting.
I've been a long time restricter (when not bingeing) though I used to fast. I was wondering what everyone's experiences are, first hand, with weight-loss when restricting to super low calorie days (say <500) vs fasting. Is fasting really better or not much of a difference?
[Goal] I got told I was unrecognizable for the first time.
/u/rosepurplesoup [5'10" | 149 | 20.84 | -33 | F]
Created: Sun Sep 11 11:10:51 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/529i5b/i_got_told_i_was_unrecognizable_for_the_first_time/
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I've noticed changes in my body for sure, but it's slow and there are days when I feel like nothing has changed and I'm just as disgusting as before. But every time I see my mom she'll mention it. She's a huge exaggerator, but this time she said she could hardly recognize me. Coming from the woman who (when I was 10 pounds lighter) told me to watch out because I was getting heavier, this felt great. I just need to keep going as planned and not self-destruct. Or have a moment of weakness and hurt myself in some fashion.
[Help] EC Stack in Germany
/u/ED2134 [168cm | fat | female| -6kg]
Created: Sun Sep 11 11:10:38 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/529i3y/ec_stack_in_germany/
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Any Germans here who have an idea where or how to get EC Stacks legally? Or have an alternative?
[Intro] Who am I?
/u/Demeter404 [5'3" | 138.0lbs | BMI: 24.4 | -22lbs | F]
Created: Sun Sep 11 10:37:39 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/529c68/who_am_i/
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Been lurking on here for a bit, don't remember how I actually found this subreddit.
I've been disordered for nearly 6 years (time flies when you hate yourself). Highest weight: ~170lbs, before I was sick. Lowest: ~110, then I developed reeeally bad bulimia and gained nearly everything back...
I've been bouncing between those numbers for the past ~6 years. As of this morning, I was 146.4 and I have been purely restricting (not b/p) from a weight of about ~160. (thus -13 in my personal flair, though I'll probably change the weight for that every time I log in).
I use ECA stack (to prevent b/p that I really don't have the money to continue doing...[bronkaid is cheaper than food, coffee is life])
[Discussion] Daily Food Diary! September 11, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Sun Sep 11 10:02:30 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5295od/daily_food_diary_september_11_2016/
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This is a daily food diary thread for September 11, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
[Thinspo] I am my own personal goal. I was like this in February 2016, and I intend to go back to this
/u/Vanilla_Mieux [5'1 | GW: 65 | F]
Created: Sun Sep 11 09:58:05 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5294xz/i_am_my_own_personal_goal_i_was_like_this_in/
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http://imgur.com/a/6hAEN?reg
[Help] Raised my calories. Nervous about it.
/u/hazelconner [5'4" | 179.6 | 34.0% BF | -10.4 | X/F]
Created: Sun Sep 11 09:34:35 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/529109/raised_my_calories_nervous_about_it/
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Lol on mobile no flair.
Anyways. So for about a week I lowered my calories to 1200 even when I was working out. And I was kinda tired but I ACTUALLY saw the scale drop for the first time in ages. But then I started to become afraid of cannibalizing my muscle which I treasure. Because I saw a drop of half a pound of lean mass too.
So I am bringing myself up to 1500 on days I exercise. Maybe even 1800 on days when I do two hours of taekwondo.
But I'm so scared of the scale stalling again, but I don't want to lose my muscle.
[Meme/Humor] My grandma suggested chew and spit as a diet. I'm cracking up.
/u/TheFatBallerina [Height 5'3"|CW 115 lbs|BMI 20.93|GW 105|UGW 95]
Created: Sun Sep 11 08:39:33 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/528s3i/my_grandma_suggested_chew_and_spit_as_a_diet_im/
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My grandma read Dolly Parton's autobiography and apparently there's a passage that talks about how Dolly stays so thin. My grandma said, "Dolly says she just chews her food and doesn't swallow it! She takes a bite of cake and chew, chew, Chattanooga chew chew then she spits it out! That's how she stays so tiny."
I couldn't stop laughing. Guess Dolly's one of us!
No exercise and it's driving me crazy
/u/wtf12345678901
Created: Sun Sep 11 08:11:34 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/528nt0/no_exercise_and_its_driving_me_crazy/
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On mobile so I can't flair as Rant/Rave.
So I'm used to running every single day as a track/XC athlete. I absolutely love the feeling of burning calories and knowing I could basically eat an entire meal from the exercise I just did. The average day would probably be about 500 calories, up to 700 or 800 on a long run or hard workout and sometimes only 300-400 on an easy day. But still, I would give absolutely anything to even get my easy runs back because now I'm screwed and I can't run.
My pattern of *slight* restriction began at the beginning of the summer, when I saw that I was at a BMI of 20.7 after taking two weeks off following the track season. And though I never really cared about what I ate, as long as it wasn't junk or sweets, now I began watching the amounts, aiming to drop about 5 pounds. Slowly I dropped a whole BMI point to 19.7, and in early July I had a physical at the doctor. They weighed me and my parents said I needed to gain weight, even though it was literally only two pounds less than the same time a year ago. So I basically maintained that weight, as my parents gave me desserts to eat such as cheesecake (for me sweets are usually a huge no-no because I tend to binge). There I was, at my 20ish BMI, when my hip started having excruciating pain while running. I was out of town for almost all of August with no chance to go to the doctor, so I stopped running and just biked at the gym. Still a pretty good way to burn calories.
After a couple weeks of waiting and trying to figure out what was wrong with my hip, I finally got an MRI and the result was: stress fracture. I found out a week ago and I am still livid. I was still at a totally healthy weight when it happened. Probably only occasionally eating at a deficit of ~300 calories a day. Running a totally normal mileage without any drastic changes. Still getting my period like clockwork. I even tested my vitamin D and iron levels, and they turned out to be perfectly normal with no sign of bone density issues. Ughhhhh what did I do wrong?? I'm stuck on crutches for five more weeks, miserable and not able to exercise AT ALL while girls on my XC team who are definitely underweight (BMI 17ish) and make me look like a whale in comparison continue to run like crazy with no consequences.
So the eating habits I described early probably don't fall into the ED category. But now as I hobble around on crutches, frustratedly cursing my sedentary TDEE of 1500 cals, I just want to lose a ton of weight. Fuck everything. I'm already down to BMI of 18.8 and I'm ready to go lower. If trying my absolute best to stay healthy and keep running failed, then I'm gonna stop trying completely. My parents haven't even noticed that I'm 5 pounds below what they considered too low this summer. If they dare try to make me stuff my face with desserts, I will absolutely resist.
Sorry for the rant. I'm depressed from not running and food is basically the only thing I can control right now. I don't even have a goal weight or anything, but I really just don't want to balloon up while I'm sedentary for another month. So I'm ready to eat 300 calorie meals and stop snacking like I always do.
Oh my God, it happened.
/u/MulattoKhaleesi
Created: Sun Sep 11 08:05:49 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/528mxc/oh_my_god_it_happened/
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I know this is a super short post. I just wanted to share my excitement over the facts that's someone commented positively on my weight today. So my dance partner was texting me and he sent me a pic of him in this area, because we travel a lot, and I sent a pic back to him and he said , quote: " damn you look skinny. Have you been eating? Are you doing this the healthy way?" Guys I was gobsmacked. I've been having a really hard time between My fasting days and my binge and Purge days. I'm just so pumped that someone noticed. Don't get me wrong I mean I still have 30 pounds to lose to even be 120, but it just left me know my strength training is slimming me out better than I thought. I just wanted to share!
[Rant/Rave] My (ex?)girlfriend and I are "on a break"
/u/venetianrosequartz [5'6"|CW 140|HW 153|LW 130|GW 135|UGW 112|WL -13| BMI 22.6|Female]
Created: Sun Sep 11 08:00:24 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/528m3m/my_exgirlfriend_and_i_are_on_a_break/
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She says she's worried about me including my eating habits... I mean I have (almost) attempted suicide in the past week but is pushing me away really the solution? She says I can't talk to her again until I get a better medication and my grades are at least b's (Oh yeah I'm skipping and failing class to b&p :( ) (not sarcasm btw i really am)
I just feel so awful. I've been crying nonstop since she told me over text. This was right after she told me she isn't attracted to me physically. I just feel so fat and ugly and unwanted. I want to fast until next Sunday. I want to fast forever. I already binged and purged this morning. i don't know if this is even coherent I'm just a massive jumble of emotions. I want to be able to talk to her. She is my rock. I love her. But now she's breaking up with me and I feel rock bottom. 💔
I suppose i should ask now. any tips on fasting /running while fasting? I really want to get a run in today they always make me feel better. thanks
mods sorry im on mobile. please tag as rant ❤
Oh my god it finally happened!
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Sep 11 07:59:52 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/528m0n/oh_my_god_it_finally_happened/
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[deleted]
[Other] I called in sick today and feel so guilty :c
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Sep 11 07:42:52 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/528jqm/i_called_in_sick_today_and_feel_so_guilty_c/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] Why does restriction make days feel so much LONGER?
/u/DivingRightIn [72in | don't ask | don't tell | ~57.2lbs | UGW: 120lbs | F]
Created: Sun Sep 11 06:38:00 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/528bpp/why_does_restriction_make_days_feel_so_much_longer/
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I've noticed on days that I binge, expecially if it starts early in the day, my time flies by even if I stop binging
If I restrict the day drags on and on. Even if I'm doing the exact same thing I would after binging
It's horrible ; _ ;
Peanut butter protein ball calories?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Sep 11 06:34:24 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/528bag/peanut_butter_protein_ball_calories/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] Relapse
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Sep 11 06:13:53 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5288ri/relapse/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] Started watching Gilmore Girls for the first time..
/u/vomitdogs [5'1 | Elephant | 19.6 | F]
Created: Sun Sep 11 05:40:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52857m/started_watching_gilmore_girls_for_the_first_time/
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.. And I love the show, but COME ON. They eat at least 3000 calories a day, yet they look gorgeous with beautiful skin and a teeny tiny waist. I hate watching them eat because they take the tiniest bites ever, obviously because the actresses don't actually eat that much and they more or less have to fake it.
Man, this show makes me hungry. Their breakfast alone has to be more than my daily calorie intake. Sorry for the rant, lol.
[Rant/Rave] Frustration with anti-ED
/u/foodfornot [5'3" | 120lbs | BMI 21.3 | -20 | GW 105 | F]
Created: Sun Sep 11 05:38:21 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5284zg/frustration_with_antied/
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I just searched for thinspo on tumblr and got a message asking if I need help.
Don't get me wrong, I understand that eating disorders are damaging and dangerous and this is not something that should be encouraged, especially in younger girls. But at the same time, if I wanted to become morbidly obese I can find butter and sugar laden recipes, photos of enormous women, and fat-positive support groups (not shaming them - go you, do what you want). Furthermore, there is plenty of other damaging content on the internet (pornography with violent abuse, men spitting on women, etc.) and none of that is blocked!! I just want to live my life in peace with my ED and communicate with others who are in similar places both physically and emotionally. It really bothers me that once you put "thin" or "ED" in a title it raises more red flags than obesity or rape. /rant
Side note: if you know of any good sites for sources for daily thinspo or "thynspo," comment or PM me. Back in the day (circa 2008) I was a part of live journal community but I'm struggling to find my digital home in 2016.
[Goal] A Not So Glorious Return + My Food Calender!
/u/mild-rose [5'11 | 143.8 |19.42 | not enough | f]
Created: Sun Sep 11 05:12:36 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5282no/a_not_so_glorious_return_my_food_calender/
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I'm baack.
I'm currently living in Finland, and the women here are so SO skinny I want to cry, like literally burst into tears whenever I see them on the street.
My boyfriend is visiting in march, and I have decided I must be at least 130 pounds by the time he visits. So I'm back here, looking for some support. In order to hold myself accountable I've [made this calendar on google calendars] (http://imgur.com/a/KxHVH) and am hoping that I'll stick to it.
I'm trying to eat about 1200 a day, 1000 with exercise.
[Help] Sick of being fat, need help getting back down.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Sep 11 04:41:15 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/527ztr/sick_of_being_fat_need_help_getting_back_down/
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[deleted]
Sunday Roast :(
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Sep 11 03:26:43 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/527tc7/sunday_roast/
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[deleted]
[Help] How the hell do I get myself out of a binge period?
/u/anamiabella [5'4" | CW 130 | GW 110 | F]
Created: Sun Sep 11 02:55:31 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/527qod/how_the_hell_do_i_get_myself_out_of_a_binge_period/
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So I've been overeating for about two weeks. My weight has stayed pretty much the same somehow. But I'm supposed to lose 20 pounds in 2 months and I'm not getting anywhere near there like this.
Every help guide tells me "restricting leads to binges leads to guilt leads to restriction leads to binges" etc. but I NEED to restrict. There is zero chance of me eating ~properly~ or anywhere near it. I just can't stick to my calorie limits. I get stressed out and one snack or meal leads to five. There's a lot of shit going on in my life that causes that stress, and restricting would be a way to get on top of it. But right now it's all on top of me.
Have any of you ever been able to pull yourself out of bingeing and get back into restricting properly? Can I try to convince myself that I AM in control?
I feel like my anorexia is turning into BED
/u/AmAlreadyGoingToHell [H: 5"8 W: 129 GW: 110 F]
Created: Sun Sep 11 02:50:28 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/527q9l/i_feel_like_my_anorexia_is_turning_into_bed/
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I have been binging and severly restricting every day for the best three months. Gaining weight, hating myself everyday.
I feel so dead, numb. Self harming doesn't help me anymore. Suicidal thoughts are coming back.
Save me from myself.
[Rant/Rave] I panicked over a vegetable
/u/throwaway7842609
Created: Sun Sep 11 02:32:52 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/527oqj/i_panicked_over_a_vegetable/
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I didn't want to post from my main, and I usually never post anyway, but I had a really bad anxiety attack while out on a date tonight and I don't have anyone to talk to who would understand and I really just need to let it out...
I have spent the last two nights looking up menus to places we might've gone to, trying to figure out what I'd be able to eat within my calorie budget. We decided on an italian place, at which I had decided yesterday I wanted soup and 2 specific vegetable sides that I was going to request without meat (vegetarian). When we go to order though, I learn that unlike what their website advertised, their food is *not* made to order and the vegetable things I wanted could not be prepped without meat (one of them I could understand, as it was a mixture of things, but the other one literally all they would've had to do was put a cheese on the regular option).
I froze as the waiter explained how they prepped everything in the morning only and how he could have them make me what he has done for his daughter (off topic, but I hate when I mention the word 'vegetarian' and some people will go on about some friend or relative who is also, and what kind of food they eat.) - basically my choice of a pasta and veggies in alfredo or cheese sauce. He also started pointing out the several meat-free options they had, most of which were either fried or pasta, or both.
He kept talking as my world went under water and I stared vacantly down at my menu, trying not to let the buildup of tears make an appearance. I planned for this, for a specific meal that was now impossible. This place *advertised* made-to-order. I shot several "help me" glances up at my date while this waiter would not stop talking to me, despite him saying three times that he would give me a few more minutes to decide (he would say that, then remember to suggest yet another pasta dish). So here I am, chest tightened, breath caught in my throat, starting to shake, moments away from hyperventilating, and this damn waiter is now kneeling right at my face level. Que date to the rescue, asking the waiter firmly to just give us a few more minutes.
Now, I'd normally never just up and leave an restaurant; if I can't eat there, I'd wait and let our server know before disappearing; but the place was packed, this attack was happening, there was no stopping it, and I had to get out there as fast as possible, so we did. I felt bad about just leaving like that, but it seemed a better option than crying in public over a vegetable. Wonderful date drove us around for about an hour or so until I had regained my composure and we ended up having sushi instead, which was lower calorie than the italian meal would've been, so it worked out in the end, but oooooh my god that was probably the worst attack I've had all year.
[Rant/Rave] Dilemma!
/u/paintmegrey
Created: Sun Sep 11 01:22:13 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/527iin/dilemma/
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So scale was up like crazy today. Like a lot. Ugh. I b/p'd on Thursday night and had a tidy 800 one day and 1000 the next to satisfy my SO cause she was getting worried.
But then this morning was up so so much I said fuck it to food today. Had my coffee, walked for 2 hours with my dog.
SO gets home from work and interrogates me about what I've eaten today (ok just asked nicely but always feels like interrogation) and gets mad at me for not eating. It's one day!! Only one! And it's not like I'm underweight.
I'm feeling so hassled by her that I just want to lie to her and tell her I'm eating to get her off my back. I have some serious progress to make and eating 1000-1200 like she wants me to just makes me feel uncomfortable.
I don't know what to do. It was easier when I was alone cause then I had no one judging me. Ugh.
My friend just came over and gifted me 3 blocks of chocolate, a jar of Nutella, and some chips.
/u/thinthinner-thinnest [183cm | 70kg | 20.09 | -2kg since 2/9/16]
Created: Sun Sep 11 01:18:48 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/527i6m/my_friend_just_came_over_and_gifted_me_3_blocks/
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My work colleagues are going to love me on Monday 😂
[Goal] one of my non scale goals
/u/gin-and-lemon [🐝 5'1"| cw: 155lbs | bmi: 30 | -7lbs | f ]
Created: Sun Sep 11 00:12:20 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/527bwj/one_of_my_non_scale_goals/
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i want to be hot/thin enough to be and ROCK that sugar baby/stripper life style. i want to profit off the fact that men(and maybe women??!!) desire me, and have to pay for my attention.
[Tip] HairTru
/u/Lunar_Heart [61.75 | 86 lbs | 16.47 | -23 | f]
Created: Sat Sep 10 23:59:07 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/527ag8/hairtru/
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So... as we all know, shedding is a big problem for those with our affliction. And it sucks.
I finally found something that helps though.
HairTru. It's wayyy cheaper than any other hair growth supplement (I'm looking at you, Viviscal) I've found and it works super well. It cut my hair loss by like 60%, I swear. And it made it grow crazy fast.
It's also just a really healthy supplement, it's full of vitimins and even made my nails break less. Cleared up my skin too. It's like a godsend.
It's kind of onscure/uncommon so I thought I'd get it out there.
It's been a miracle so far. I hope it helps someone else too<3
[Discussion] Netflix Thinspo
/u/NeverThinEnough [5'4.5" | 98.8 | 16.7 | -29.2 | F]
Created: Sat Sep 10 23:51:41 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5279nq/netflix_thinspo/
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Has anyone watched "Don't Trust the Bitch in Apartment 23"? I'm not sure where it's available, but I can watch it in the US.
Oh my gosh...the main character Chloe (Krysten Ritter) is such thinspo in her look, style, and the fact that her character never eats and seems to live off of just liqueur. Haha. The few times she has held food she just kind of looks at it and literally throws it on the ground. I love how subtle they make it.
I just started season two today! It's my treadmill show right now and it's been keeping me on the treadmill for hours everyday because I can't help binge watching it!
Has anyone else watched this show?
Does anyone have any other good Netflix thinspo shows?
[Rant/Rave] When am I going to be loved?
/u/BluestNovember [5'4" | SW: 200+ lbs | CW: too high | BMI: under 40 | -21lbs | F]
Created: Sat Sep 10 23:35:52 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5277uj/when_am_i_going_to_be_loved/
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I keep waiting for love. I've never really been loved, and it makes me so sad, sometimes. I've tried to love myself, but it's so impossible. It feeds my depression so much, sometimes.
[Help] [not ED related] I don't know if my boyfriend abused me and I feel really confused and afraid.
/u/minamasood [5'6.5"| hopeless| 22F]
Created: Sat Sep 10 23:01:03 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5273pu/not_ed_related_i_dont_know_if_my_boyfriend_abused/
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Hi this has nothing to do with my ED but I feel safe here. Any advice or support is appreciated. I'm trying to be unbiased and give detail because I might be missing something but last night was really bizarre and scary.
I was over his new apartment for the first time. The walls are thin and he's has some anxiety about his housemates hearing our conversations so we had to whisper or text to communicate. Strange, but I was happy to oblige because him letting me stay over is a big deal. At one point, he was getting kinda touchy and sexual so while the TV was on I whispered asking him if we would be having sex later. I just didn't think we would be due to his anxiety so I asked. His face got really angry and he grabbed my neck really hard. It hurt. He wrote out that I don't have respect in his house and he asked me not to talk about sex. He apologized for using force and I apologized too for not being understanding of his anxiety.
I feel like maybe that was my fault and I let it go. Later, we were listening to music and I was singing along quietly to the song. I wasn't whispering but I was singing (not talking) so I didn't think it was a big deal. But he asked me to stop and I said "I'm just singing along, relax." Then his face got unrecognizably angry and he grabbed my throat again even harder. I asked him to let me go but when he saw that I was crying he did it again to make me stop.
I don't know if this is abuse because he just grabbed me and maybe didn't realize he was hurting me. He apologized a bunch of times after I texted him that I wanted to go home. But once I said it was ok he started trying to have/actually having sex with me. So I don't know if it was genuine. I had nightmares about it end felt really uneasy but I didn't want to set him off again so I didn't say anything that night into the morning.
Tonight I'm at my own house and I texted him saying that I needed to know that wouldn't happen again and he recognizes that it was bad. He didn't respond so when I called him he said I was lying about being scared and I was just trying to get attention and he hung up. I don't know what to think. I want to give him a shot because I love him but I feel really scared. I didn't think singing would make him do that and I don't know what will set him off.
I don't know if I can break up with him. He's honestly all I have and the only boy I trust. I want to be able to feel safe around him but I feel really scared right now to even contact him.
[Rant/Rave] Family dinners at my dads are killing me.
/u/TiredOfBeingFat_ [6'0"| CW251 |BMI34 | 22lost | GW130]
Created: Sat Sep 10 22:53:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5272vf/family_dinners_at_my_dads_are_killing_me/
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My whole family is obese, and they know I'm actively trying to lose weight. But they always get offended when I don't eat ungodly amounts of food at dinner. So I always have to stuff myself full. And they freak out when I don't really eat much throughout the day. I don't know what to do. I feel like I'm going to gain all the weight I've lost back if I keep doing this.
I probably ate 2,000 cals worth of dinner. And it wasn't even unhealthy stuff. I ate too much of it. I just keep getting really frustrated at myself for doing this. This past week has been really hard on me and it has my head spinning.
:( I just want to not Fuck up for once.
Thank heavens foot size doesn't change when you lose weight
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Sep 10 21:57:51 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/526vfa/thank_heavens_foot_size_doesnt_change_when_you/
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[deleted]
[Discussion] Defining ED vs "healthy eating" - some questions
/u/cannibale101 [5'4 | HW:150smtg | CW: heh | GW:108 | 28F]
Created: Sat Sep 10 21:53:10 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/526urx/defining_ed_vs_healthy_eating_some_questions/
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How can one know if they have an ED or not? Is there any clear threshold, does it actually mean anything...? Where do we draw the line between a "healthy" and "unhealthy" relationship with food...? Especially considering how messed up Western society got and how just about everyone i know has a deep, emotional link to food, i'm really struggling to figure out where i stand in all this and what i "should" be to be considered mentally healthy.
Like, since it seems awfully normal for most people to let everyday situations influence their eating habits, is the only difference between disordered and non-disordered people the amount of trauma they accumulated, so that it gets "too obvious" through their eating behaviors? It just shows too much?
[Rant/Rave] a nice(ish) surprise
/u/gin-and-lemon [🐝 5'1"| cw: 155lbs | bmi: 30 | -7lbs | f ]
Created: Sat Sep 10 21:18:38 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/526py4/a_niceish_surprise/
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i 100% thought i ate waaaay over 2000 calories today, and put off entering everything because i was afraid. its not like the numbers a good number (1818, when my limit until halloween is supposed to be 650), but hell, i now feel slightly less like crying. which is good ish?
and i've decided on my first 48 hour fast (i've only barely made it to 24 hours) for monday/tuesday this week, and i'm kind of excited. everyone's anecdotes of feeling empty, floaty, and all that sounds great. with how hot its been here, it should make it easy. i don't usually feel hungry when its hot out. the biggest struggle will be the lack of alcohol.
[Tip] Don't take your hair for granted.
/u/kpatable [5'9" | 124.6 | 18.1/18.4 | -22.4 | F]
Created: Sat Sep 10 20:15:04 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/526h17/dont_take_your_hair_for_granted/
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I am losing my hair, and I don't think it's nutrition related since my labs are fine. I have already lost a significant amount in the front and have recession and thinning around my hairline. And now, on top of that, I've been experiencing all-over hair loss for a month, so it's not looking good. The worst part is that this year is the first year I have lived as a woman, which is who I am. Being born with gender-sex incongruity (what society calls being transgender) caused me to be raised as a boy and go through male puberty. Male pattern baldness began for me at age 17. So what I'm saying is that I've *never* had the chance of having a beautiful, feminine hairstyle because my hair thinned before I began treating my GSI, and I'm continuing to lose it despite the treatment. This really gets to me sometimes. Please, don't take your full head of hair for granted if you have one. Having at least evenly thick hair across one's whole head seems to be something that is taken for granted in girl world, since hair thinning isn't as common in women. So please. If you have a full head of hair, you have something special. *Cherish it*.
I have a toned stomach with a smallish waist but my thighs are GINORMOUS
/u/thinthinner-thinnest [183cm | 70kg | 20.09 | -2kg since 2/9/16]
Created: Sat Sep 10 19:59:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/526esu/i_have_a_toned_stomach_with_a_smallish_waist_but/
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Has anyone with a similar body type (pear?) lost enough weight that you finally didn't hate your thighs? What was your BMI? I feel like when I lose weight it comes off my thighs last. I want to wear cute skirts. 😒
Edit: sorry I'm on mobile I can't flair; I'll do it when I get home
[Thinspo] My current obsession: Alexa Chung
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Sep 10 19:35:36 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/526bb3/my_current_obsession_alexa_chung/
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https://imgur.com/a/IpCTw
[Meme/Humor] I have two moods
/u/caithaa [5'7 | 156 | 24 | -33]
Created: Sat Sep 10 19:22:15 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5269cn/i_have_two_moods/
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http://imgur.com/a/9ZzEh
[Other] Cards Against ProED: Round 2
/u/throwaway912837198 [5'8" | 112 | 17 | F]
Created: Sat Sep 10 18:33:18 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52624z/cards_against_proed_round_2/
---
Hey lovelies, does anybody want to play this again? Added some new cards!
Here's the deck: https://www.cardcastgame.com/browse/deck/9EQPA
and here's a link to the game: http://pyx-3.pretendyoure.xyz/zy/game.jsp#game=60
password is halotop
[Goal] As of today, I lost my GW
/u/In_a_fatsuit [64" | 119# | 20.9 BMI | -104# | F]
Created: Sat Sep 10 18:27:43 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52619u/as_of_today_i_lost_my_gw/
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As in my current GW is 104 lbs. And I've lost 104 lbs. Kinda fucked up.
In the past month, two people have told me I look good and then urged me not to lose any more weight because I'm "perfect" the way I am. While I'm happy to have such a thing said about me, I don't know what to do to keep people I don't see often from noticing large drops in weight. Like, my friends I see every week, they wouldn't really notice if I lost about a half pound a week. But family and friends in other states visiting for holidays, etc? I really don't want anyone to give me any shit. I should probably start practicing multi-day fasts in preparation for the onslaught of gluttony that awaits us over the next few months. Ugh. The best defense is a good offense...
I don't know how I feel. Other than not thin enough, blah blah blah.
At least shopping for hallo ween costumes will be easier. Maybe I can fit into the kids' stuff this year! Their costumes are usually better, anyway :p
[Rant/Rave] Surprisingly in love with my new serving job!
/u/tobenothingatall [5'2 | 110 | 20.84 | -15 | f]
Created: Sat Sep 10 18:14:20 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/525zb4/surprisingly_in_love_with_my_new_serving_job/
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Okay, I'm so excited about my new job! I started serving in a pretty nice Italian restaurant last week and I was so nervous that working around food again would make me gain even more weight than I already have, but the exact opposite is proving to be true.
A couple of months ago I started dating a new guy (who makes me so fucking happy, oh my gosh) and he loves to cook, so I've been eating way more than I normally do. I haven't weighed myself because I'm afraid of the number, but I can only imagine it's at least 5-7 pounds.
I started this job last week, and they've been scheduling me to work almost every day. I tend not to eat before I go to work, and since I'm so busy throughout the day, and we get free coffee, I don't even think about eating. When I work doubles, fasting the entire day is an absolute breeze!
Anyhow, there's not much of a point to this post, I've just been really excited about this progress and couldn't wait to share! ^.^
Does anybody else have a similar experience in working in food service?
[Discussion] how many calories do you eat a day?
/u/tinybites [5'6" | sw: 185 | cw: 159.5 | gw: 115]
Created: Sat Sep 10 18:13:27 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/525z66/how_many_calories_do_you_eat_a_day/
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I'm just curious. lately I've been eating 600-800 calories and feel like that's way too much but I can't stop snacking. 😷
edit : I forgot I can't flair this bc mobile. sorry!
I dread the weekends
/u/smallpaint [6'2" | 165.2lb | M]
Created: Sat Sep 10 18:08:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/525yco/i_dread_the_weekends/
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During the week I was perfect. For the first time in months I was my old, superior self-- ribs coming back, head clear, determined. And then I'm stuck at home with the family and they make me eat over maintenance, and I *lose it.*
[Thinspo] While reading today, I came across a thinspo-esque quote. No one but you guys would appreciate <3
/u/fckk [5'4| CW 120lbs | 20.60 | GW 115 | F]
Created: Sat Sep 10 17:02:59 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/525oo6/while_reading_today_i_came_across_a_thinspoesque/
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I got stoned today and posted up in barnes and noble with a venti black iced coffee, 1 sweet n low, dubstep, and the book "Pretty Baby" by Mary Kubica (sooo good, I ended up buying it, making it 2 books by her in two weeks that I've gotten. FYI - it's along the lines of 'gone girl' and 'girl on a train' and 'good girl' vibes if you're into those books. I like using them as a distraction to real life especially after a Saturday morning smoke sesh).
I read this line and thought it was so ethereal and delicate. It's a pretty insignificant, mundane description but it just reminded me of all the thinspo I love and it made me super content with my black iced coffee and nothing else. The temptation for any pastry dissipated.
**"She's thin. Malnourished, I tell myself. But maybe she's just thin. Her clothes droop, her jeans are baggy, her coat too big."**
In a way, don't we want to come off as "just thin" but also make people wonder.....
Xo hope you're enjoying your weekends <3
[Help] Scale help?
/u/Navelpudding [5' 6" | 185 | -65 | F]
Created: Sat Sep 10 16:23:15 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/525ii5/scale_help/
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I trave a ton in a very bumpy fashion. I'm afraid a scale will break, I thought I would be OK but it's making me nuts.
I'm looking at a cheap analog scale, do you think it will survive? If not should I get a digital one?
[Rant/Rave] So my mom had a fight with my brother
/u/TemporaryAccount_101 [5'3'' | AHAHAH | -5.5kgs | 18F]
Created: Sat Sep 10 15:43:18 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/525c5r/so_my_mom_had_a_fight_with_my_brother/
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And it was just over his stupidity btw.
I never really mind fights as long as they don't pull me in them. Anyways, my mom decided she wasn't hungry and because she was angry she stated she was gonna "behave like anorexics."
While I'm not/can't really be considered anorexic anymore, it was hurtful.
She's my ultimate thinspo. She never overeats. She never has second. She's always toned.
She is absolute perfection ( all her ribs are showing, she has a huge motherfucking thighgap, amazing collarbones and dem cheeckbones), and yet she felt the need to pull the anorexic card just to be more dramatic ( ~~I'm fighting with my son, oh! what a terrible mother I am!~~ )
I'm pretty sure I didn't properly explain myself, so sorry if there are any misunderstandings, I just needed to vent a bit :\
[Other] Feeling upset about something my mum said.
/u/smallsmallersmallest [168cm | CW 50.9kg GW 46kg | 18.09 | -10.1kg | F]
Created: Sat Sep 10 15:22:21 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5258pt/feeling_upset_about_something_my_mum_said/
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Sorry I've posted so much lately, I have a lot on my mind.
I was talking to my mum last night about my ED, I'm quite open with her about it, she doesn't always understand and she sometimes offers advice that isn't quite.. suitable for the situation, like the ED version of "Don't be depressed, just smile and think positively!". But it's good to be able to talk about it with someone in real life as well as here.
But yesterday she said something that really didn't bother me that much when she said it but now I have it stuck in my head. She said something along the lines of 'Are you doing this so that I don't have to spend as much money on a coffin for you?' and to be honest, it kinda hurts :( I know she was saying it because she's frustrated, because she thought it would shock me into being better maybe? She says things when she's emotional that she wouldn't say normally but I dunno, it doesn't stop it from hurting.
Maybe I'm overreacting.
[Discussion] Does anyone else use mybodygallery for thinspo?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Sep 10 15:14:36 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5257dy/does_anyone_else_use_mybodygallery_for_thinspo/
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[deleted]
[Help] EC Stack Question
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Sep 10 14:47:30 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5252tu/ec_stack_question/
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[deleted]
Questionable morals...?
/u/Oyapunn [5'8" | CW: 139.2 | GW:135 | UGW:125 |-8.8]
Created: Sat Sep 10 14:44:05 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/52527k/questionable_morals/
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Over the summer I really changed how I eat and viewed food; heavy restricting, clean eating, excersise, etc.
But school has started again and all of that has pretty much gone out the window. I'm working over 40 hours a week as well as going to school for education (which means student teaching, meetings, lesson making..) and I just don't have to even shop or meal prep or excersise. I pretty much eat only when I'm at work since they provide meals, or if I'm out on a date.
I'm not great with change so I binged pretty badly the first week or so, but now I'm able to restrict mysel to a meal or two a day, and although I'm mindful of what I eat I'm usually eating close to my TDEE anyway.
Anyway, to the main point. I met this guy and everything in my head is telling me that what I'm doing with him is terrible, but I can't stop. He's 13 years older than me, and in just two dates he's spent nearly 1k on me. He keeps telling me about all the places he wants to take me and things we can do, and although I don't fully believe everything e says, I figure I might as well just enjoy myself and see what I can get out of it (I....sound so terrible haha..)
Since our last date, I've been a lot more critical of what I'm eating and am fasting for the first time in a while. I find myself reasoning "I should get skinnier for him, he would probably like it more if I looked even better"
Has anyone else has questionable reasons behind their eating habits? Or perhaps have you realized that You make different decisions/ think differently during/post active restricting?
(I also realize this place might not be the most appropriate place to talk about this but TBH I really wanted to talk about it and I CANNOT tell anyone I know about any of this hahaaa)
[Thinspo] Found an old pic from two years ago; 5'1" 75 pounds
/u/Lunar_Heart [61.75 | 86 lbs | 16.47 | -23 | f]
Created: Sat Sep 10 14:20:07 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/524y2v/found_an_old_pic_from_two_years_ago_51_75_pounds/
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http://imgur.com/Vcm5MfD
[Rant/Rave] Someone just posted in the Wellness Weekend thread on Fatlogic
/u/khtfc09 [5'7.5" |144 lbs | 22.06 | 5.8 lbs | F]
Created: Sat Sep 10 14:14:44 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/524x6h/someone_just_posted_in_the_wellness_weekend/
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"Last time I ate was around 8 pm last night. I'm fasting all day today until tomorrow since I'm going to the Eagles game and will be tailgating.
It started off as a joke I made yesterday in the fat rant thread, then somebody said "why not? Fasting can be good"
I've done 16/8 and 20/4...but this will be the first time going like 36 hrs before my next meal, kinda excited."
Someone commented that his choice was *awesome*. But if we fast, we need help...
Im scared
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Sep 10 13:42:52 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/524rql/im_scared/
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[deleted]
I already fucked up my fast today, but my dad had me walk to the store. So logging this made me feel pretty good.
/u/TiredOfBeingFat_ [6'0"| CW251 |BMI34 | 22lost | GW130]
Created: Sat Sep 10 13:18:27 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/524nh1/i_already_fucked_up_my_fast_today_but_my_dad_had/
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http://imgur.com/7Iur8zB
[Rant/Rave] Oh my god I cant stop gaining
/u/kafka__dreams
Created: Sat Sep 10 12:57:27 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/524jwh/oh_my_god_i_cant_stop_gaining/
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Last december I was 109. In May I was 115. Right now Im 126! I have no idea how this happened! Obviously Im eating more than I should be, or else I wouldn't gain. I think i can attribute like 3lbs to pms, but fuuuuck. I need to restrict. A lot. And hydrate. And not weigh myself for a little while. Anyone else had this happen? I didn't think I was eating much at all, but I must be!
[Rant/Rave] How do I celebrate reaching a new goal weight?
/u/zomboooo [5'7|115|18.1|-2|NB]
Created: Sat Sep 10 12:56:16 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/524jp3/how_do_i_celebrate_reaching_a_new_goal_weight/
---
By going out and buying a huge amount of binge food!
I hate myself but tomorrow is a new day.
[Rant/Rave] Middle Ground [trigger warning: recovery]
/u/Alexa1p [5'5'' | 110 | 18 | -10.7 | F]
Created: Sat Sep 10 11:57:45 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5249fm/middle_ground_trigger_warning_recovery/
---
Lately I've been toying with the idea of maintaining, or even gaining weight. So.. I've been reading recovery literature, but honestly? It's all so gross.
Lovely sentences such as, "You can enjoy a complete and even permanent remission, but it requires of you that you never restrict your intake."
And people seem so damn condescending! There's a part in this 'Phases of Recovery' article where the author goes:
"Most will profess that their exercise regime has nothing to do with restriction and that it is merely for all the mood-modulating benefits that exercise will provide.
Yah, no. Mood-modulating benefits can be achieved through simply sitting outside and the mood-modulating benefits of exercise are far from scientifically definitive as well."
???? What? You're going to really be that dismissive of someone's experience? And then deny that exercise has a positive affect on mood? That's... why I don't want to recover, because of bullshit like this that treats me as though my preferences don't matter, because they don't make a distinction between me and my eating disorder.
I'm going to increase my caloric intake to slightly above maintenance, and start weight lifting. This seems to be a healthier option than continuing to eat 0-600 calories for multiple days. It's just aggravating I feel like this is a huge milestone for me, yet some people don't want to recognize that at all and insist on telling me how I **need** to eat 500-1000 calories above maintenance. My BMI is above 18, I'm not about to die, please calm the fuck down.
Calves are insanely fat.
/u/quietaboutlies
Created: Sat Sep 10 10:53:31 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/523ywi/calves_are_insanely_fat/
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[removed]
[Other] This is childish but can someone convince me that I don't need this latte LOL
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Sep 10 10:31:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/523v9a/this_is_childish_but_can_someone_convince_me_that/
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[deleted]
[Help] Help, tomorrow I'm going to the first date of my life.
/u/Mi__ra [165cm |50 kg | 18.6 | 0 | F]
Created: Sat Sep 10 10:27:19 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/523uij/help_tomorrow_im_going_to_the_first_date_of_my/
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Sorry, this isn't directly about eating disorders, but you folks seem like I can share this with you.
So I'm 29. I haven't ever been on a date. He suggested we go biking, which is awesome - I don't have to think about drinking or eating anything. But I haven't a clue how to behave - do you have any hints?
Anyone else want to be unattractively, sickly thin?
/u/copofteashirt
Created: Sat Sep 10 10:12:18 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/523s72/anyone_else_want_to_be_unattractively_sickly_thin/
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I don't even want to look good anymore. I just enjoy the thought of appearing as falling apart. I want people to be worried and realize how fucked up I am in my mind.
[Discussion] Daily Food Diary! September 10, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Sat Sep 10 10:02:21 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/523qky/daily_food_diary_september_10_2016/
---
This is a daily food diary thread for September 10, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
[Tip] Hi everyone, New here. What are the best tips to refusing binges? How do you get away with looking too skinny in front of a family member or boyfriend? Thanks you guys, I just really can't stand how I feel when I am forced to eat something I don't feel comfortable with.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Sep 10 09:55:11 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/523pfv/hi_everyone_new_here_what_are_the_best_tips_to/
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[deleted]
[Discussion] Favorite FB pages?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Sep 10 09:38:50 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/523msf/favorite_fb_pages/
---
[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] Really struggling between my ED and my life today
/u/cinamintoast [5'6" | 203 | 32.76 | -67 | F]
Created: Sat Sep 10 09:05:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/523hfh/really_struggling_between_my_ed_and_my_life_today/
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I have been fasting for about 30 hours or so. Usually I can get through 48 hours with no trouble, but today I'm feeling a bit weak and lightheaded. Any other day and I'd just chug some powerade and power through it, but I'm supposed to be taking this big huge exam in a couple of hours. It's required to get certified in my career field, and it cost $250. I really can't afford to fail the test, and I know I should really eat something so that I'll be able to focus and do well, but the thought of eating anything with calories is just giving me more anxiety than the test itself. I also have a date tonight with a guy I really like, so I really just want to be as light as I possibly can be and I really don't want to eat. I can't deal with this.
Edit: didn't eat, just had some broth. I passed my test and I feel pretty good now
Meet Jamie: After Years of Battling Her Eating Disorder She Decided To Stop Chasing 'Perfection' and Start Chasing Happiness.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Sep 10 09:04:22 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/523h63/meet_jamie_after_years_of_battling_her_eating/
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https://www.motivated2begreat.com/blogs/meettheteam/jamie
This sub is full of funny advertising!
/u/WeighingDown [5'2" | 108 | 20.46 | F]
Created: Sat Sep 10 08:59:17 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/523gdj/this_sub_is_full_of_funny_advertising/
---
http://imgur.com/TCxgH21
[Help] has anyone seen thinspo for the Margot Robbie body type?
/u/cactuskey [5'0 | CW: 104lb | GW: 75lb | 26F]
Created: Sat Sep 10 08:44:33 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/523e1x/has_anyone_seen_thinspo_for_the_margot_robbie/
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sorry for the brand spankin new account. Lurked this sub for a long time on my main but I don't want anyone to know I struggle with ED thoughts...
anyway most of the thinspo I see is focused on girls with very long, narrow ribcages. I've always dreamed of having a waist like that that but my proportions more like [Margot Robbie's](http://screenmusings.org/movie/blu-ray/The-Wolf-of-Wall-Street/images/The-Wolf-of-Wall-Street-0027.jpg). Wide and short waist with thin limbs and substantial middle area. i can't even imagine what a BMI 16 or underweight version of that body looks like. Does anyone have any examples? I'd love to have a goal in mind that I can actually achieve. Margot Robbie looks great but I wouldnt say she's as skinny as thinspo usually is. not sure if i should flag this help or other
[Rant/Rave] Anyone else feel like you'll never look good because of your body shape? [Rant]
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Sep 10 08:38:52 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/523d7e/anyone_else_feel_like_youll_never_look_good/
---
[deleted]
Binging problems
/u/smallsmallersmallest [168cm | CW 50.9kg GW 46kg | 18.09 | -10.1kg | F]
Created: Sat Sep 10 08:09:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5238y4/binging_problems/
---
My tongue is too numb from the two ice creams i wolfed down to be able to taste the cake I wasn't even enjoying.
[Rant/Rave] Screw you Pinterest
/u/PostcardFrom1982 [34 | 5'4" | Mom bod]
Created: Sat Sep 10 07:25:32 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5232y0/screw_you_pinterest/
---
Hi I'm new. I've been lurking here for a while (long before I made this new account). Because I really needed someone to talk to about the ridiculousness of my ED.
I come from a line of people with eating disorders. My grandfather was diagnosed bulimic. My mother has BED. And while my grandmother was never diagnosed, I suspect she had BED too. We had a conversation in my mid teens about that switch that goes off in your body when you've eaten enough, to tell you to stop eating. She said she didn't have that switch. And I don't think I do either. So it's literally in my blood, this ridiculousness.
I've been struggling with bulimia for years. I currently have a job with terrible health insurance and the counselor I'd been seeing wasn't covered and I couldn't afford $100 twice weekly sessions to see her so I stopped. I've been trying to figure out ways to deal with it on my own and hadn't really found anything that worked (meditation, intuitive eating, CICO, weight watchers, keto, paleo, blah blah blah) until I came across fasting. It was like an epiphany. Not eating at all is so much easier than trying to eat "right". I would fast for a couple of days, and then I could eat what I wanted (even have a mini binge) and I wouldn't feel like I needed to purge. It was the first time in years that I had felt full and not immediately hated myself and ran to get rid of it. My purging is down from once or twice a day to once every couple of weeks which is HUGE for me. And I'm not gaining weight.
I've been researching fasting to make sure that I'm not doing any more damage to my body, reading everything I can get my hands on. So on a whim I searched for fasting on Pinterest. And there at the top was a big banner asking if I was struggling with an eating disorder.
Fuck. You.
I have a board dedicated to cocktails with a couple hundred pins. But no one bothers to ask if I'm an alcoholic. I have a board dedicated to organization, but no one is worried I have OCD. Why didn't you ask if I had an eating disorder when I created my "meat filled" board with a thousand calorie filled recipes? There is no associated banner when I search for illicit drugs. Why the fucking stigma for eating disorders?
Ugh I'm so mad.
[Discussion] I just got roasted and it's made me happier about how I look than I've been in a long time
/u/LiteralMangina [5'7" | 98lbs | 15.3 | -25 | F]
Created: Sat Sep 10 06:09:50 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/522u1i/i_just_got_roasted_and_its_made_me_happier_about/
---
Sorry, I can't flair because I'm on mobile
All the jokes are about how I look like a holocaust victim and stuff. The only thing I can think about right now is "Holy crap, I've made it!"
Has anyone else ever felt this way about a comment that any normal person would see as rude and mean? I mean, I know I asked for it and I genuinely laughed at a lot of the comments, I just feel a bit conflicted because the only comments about my looks that made me self-conscious were about my hair or eyebrows.
[Discussion] 'Stupid Questions' Saturday! September 10, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Sat Sep 10 06:02:30 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/522t8c/stupid_questions_saturday_september_10_2016/
---
This is the weekly 'Stupid Questions' Saturday thread for September 10, 2016.
Use this thread as an opportunity to ask any questions you might have that you feel don't necessarily warrant their own post.
Please be wary of false advice and information. Be sure to research the facts before taking anyone's advice, no matter who they are. Remember that diagnosing members is unacceptable. **Anyone looking for medical guidance should seek the opinion of a medically licensed professional.**
*****
Have any questions or concerns? Comment below, or [PM the mods.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FproED)
How in the god's name do I stop eating all the time?
/u/Vanilla_Mieux [5'1 | GW: 65 | F]
Created: Sat Sep 10 05:41:29 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/522r3i/how_in_the_gods_name_do_i_stop_eating_all_the_time/
---
I swear from the moment I have breakfast until late at night I just eat eat eat, purge, eat, purge, repeat.
I'll go crazy, please please someone help me
[Discussion] [Slightly NSFW] I am no longer going to take EC stacks
/u/matchstick_mind [5'0 | CW: 96.4lbs | GW: 84lbs | BMI: 19.83 | 21/F]
Created: Sat Sep 10 05:28:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/522pqx/slightly_nsfw_i_am_no_longer_going_to_take_ec/
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So this might be a little TMI but I've noticed that whenever I take a stack, it becomes near impossible for me to get wet. Which, if I was single, wouldn't bother me in the slightest. But considering that I'm with someone right now, I don't want this to become an intimacy problem. I did have a concern that it was because I was too low a weight, especially when I was under 90 pounds, but it wasn't as bad as it is when I am on the stack.
Has anyone else had this problem? How long does it take before you get back to normal?
[Help] Anyone ever gained a bunch of weight temporarily and then got back on track? And the weight gain/overeating was just a 'blip'? :(
/u/smokesanddietcokes [Doesn't actually know what she's talking about.]
Created: Sat Sep 10 05:23:22 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/522p88/anyone_ever_gained_a_bunch_of_weight_temporarily/
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I feel emotionally, mentally, and physically ready to get back on track and take control over my eating habits after binging a lot the last few weeks - except one hurdle.
For some reason I'm afraid that I just wont be able to. Despite actually feeling ready, having a much better plan in place and a really good opportunity over the next few weeks to execute it and get used to it.. I feel afraid and scared that I am actually totally out of control now and I wont be able to get a handle on eating even moderately again, let alone restricting (my initial aim is to just maintain, or very slight restriction, as I quit the overeating and binging). That I am just going to balloon and balloon and get fatter and fatter.
I started this binge-restrict-binge some more cycle because I was exhausted, stressed, tired and *ravenous*. It was a combination of things. I feel I have identified all those things, and devised some new rules within my eating plan to combat them (higher cal limit mainly, especially on gym days - I'm planning to actually eat to my TDEE every gym day for instance rather than slip into restriction - as well as more varied nutrition, and easing on the low carb. Also, quitting weighing myself..).
Despite the lack of a weight goal for now, I would like to see some of this binge fat-weight go away even just slowly.. lean out a little again. Just a little even. I've gained perhaps 10lbs the last few weeks. But if not that, I'd like to at least stop binging and gaining!
So I am seeking some reassurance - These last few weeks don't mean I am totally out of control right? Can 'blips' like this happen.. **but truly just be blips?** Have you ever had a 1-2 month 'blip' of this nature but then got to your goal weight or even just back into comfortable restriction/maintaining/whatever?
[Other] I just passed out twice :/
/u/Itsemurha [177cm|CW 67kg| GW: 55kg | SW:120kg |20.9| F]
Created: Sat Sep 10 05:16:37 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/522ol0/i_just_passed_out_twice/
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I guess I pushed it pretty hard at work today and then came home and had a really hot bath then went to chill out in bed. I was chattin to some people online for a few hours and then I guess I passed out because I woke up on my back and my leg was burning because it touched my heater when I fell down. Then I immediately decided I needed water so i got up and tried filling my water bottle but I passed out again and woke up sitting on the floor slouched up against the wall and had poured out all of my water on the floor. My cheek fucking hurts so I guess I smacked my face against the sink when I went down. All of this happened within the span of 7 minutes because that's when the last chat message I saw was sent.
Idk what to do now I feel like shit, I'm locked out of the house until morning so I can't get anything to eat and I don't even want to because then I'd have to explain why I need food at 12am.. Just wanting to crawl in a hole and die atm :(
[Discussion] If you actually contacted a tapeworm from eating food like sashimi, would you be terrified or secretly a tiny bit happy?
/u/yousimperlikeaduck
Created: Sat Sep 10 04:28:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/522jtf/if_you_actually_contacted_a_tapeworm_from_eating/
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Never mind guys i found out after two days of researching that it can actually make you gain weight
Source;
https://youtu.be/-4uA1yXmWAA
[Goal] Way back when - I used to model. Need to get back to this.
/u/skinnylove73 [5'10 | 125 | 17.49 | -15 | F]
Created: Sat Sep 10 03:59:13 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/522h5i/way_back_when_i_used_to_model_need_to_get_back_to/
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http://imgur.com/a/U7R4y
[Rant/Rave] I hate life right now
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Sep 10 00:29:29 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/521x4z/i_hate_life_right_now/
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[deleted]
[Discussion] LSD helped me emotionally disassociate from food.
/u/m_inimal
Created: Sat Sep 10 00:15:21 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/521vr6/lsd_helped_me_emotionally_disassociate_from_food/
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Overall, I have had markedly negative experiences with psychedelics; both circumstantially (took them at the wrong time, with the wrong people) and had some classically "bad trips". However, I am of the belief that psychedelics can be a spiritual teaching tool for some people. I know they were for me, which is why I don't regret taking them. Tripping on mushrooms and acid (on different occasions, lol) helped me learn things about myself and the world that I don't know if I could have learned otherwise, and almost certainly not as deeply or viscerally.
One piece of understanding that comes to surface pretty frequently since my last trip is just how *animal* we all are. Life is brutal and short, and it's so, so easy to get caught up in the psychological matrix of this world we have created for ourselves. We convince ourselves that all these human constructs, like the Internet, the clothes we wear, the houses we live in, the jobs we go to, are REAL reality, when now I realize that they are just weird flourishes and developments on something far more fundamental. And that fundamental thing is: we're organisms. We're born. We live. We eat. We shit. We fuck. We get old. We die. In the end, that's all. And like the organisms that live in the wild, we don't need to let our eating, one of the most natural things we do, to exist in this socially constructed matrix of what's healthy, what's easy, what's tasty. Just eat to feed your body so it can keep going. That's it. It *kind of* matters what sort of food you're eating, but not that much. As long as you're getting enough calories to keep up your activities, you're pretty much fine, at least in the short term. And ideally, like a wild animal, you're consuming at the bare minimum. Just enough to keep going, no more, no less.
I don't know, something about that idea really resonated with me, and has definitely affected the way I eat. I'm much more inclined now to slowly eat, little bits at a time, or to wait until I am truly, undoubtedly hungry before I start that process. And in doing so, I have lost a lot of weight (not enough yet though lol. Still carrying around that biological excess).
I'm not promoting psychedelics because I really don't believe they are good for everyone. Some of the things I learned are terrible, and I wonder now if I lost some kind of fundamental innocence in the process. But there's no going back. So here's to hoping that someone can learn what I did, without eating poisonous mushrooms or letting a weird chemical dissolve in your mouth. :)
Hobbies easy to get lost in?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Sep 10 00:13:34 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/521vkr/hobbies_easy_to_get_lost_in/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] Halo Top, prepare to meet my freezer
/u/coldbreezy [4'11" | 81 | 17.37 | F]
Created: Fri Sep 9 22:49:13 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/521m7b/halo_top_prepare_to_meet_my_freezer/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/682d93c167ef4134a8dd9fb5504b91fa?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=b16f081fa5d905723d81db942f391a99
[Rant/Rave] Small ightly worried rant
/u/lovemyfragilebones [5'2" | 99 | 18.11/18.76 | -11 | gq 19]
Created: Fri Sep 9 22:45:04 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/521lou/small_ightly_worried_rant/
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Two things have been bugging me lately.
1- a couple weeks ago I decided to draw my own thinspo. At first the girls I drew were healthy-skinny, toned, may be slightly underweight but not really. But it wasn't good enough. I kept erasing and re-penciling, shaving them down over and over and when I came away from the page, they were bones. I had to try so hard not to keep making them even skinnier. It didn't bother me hugely, but it's kind of been tugging at the corners of my mind, and the worst part is, it's bugging me *because I don't look like them yet.*
2- I have a friend who's had anorexia in the past, is losing pregnancy weight and went hungry for a while because of finances, and may or may not still be losing. I'm 5'2" and about 105, she's 5'0" and about 95. I didn't think it would be a big difference, but it is. I finally met her in person and she's just so... beautiful, and tiny. She's *tiny*. I want to look like her, or be skinnier than her. Like, she could probably kick my ass but she *looks* delicate. And ED brain wants to compete with her and be smaller.
Idk. These things have been bothering me a little, wanted to get it all out.
Jesus what's wrong with me.
/u/stephanynotstokes [5'5| too fat |-76 lbs | F]
Created: Fri Sep 9 22:27:18 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/521jcy/jesus_whats_wrong_with_me/
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(I've been posting a lot lately sorry)
I've been fasting for going on 4 days I'm trying to hold out for 10+ days anyway, idk I just feel fucking bigger and like I'm gaining. I weighed this morning and I know for a fact that I have not gained but.....idk. I feel bigger, I look bigger. My mind is fuckeeeddd. I don't know what's wrong with me. I'm fasting but for some reason that's not good enough.
binging...and liking it?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Sep 9 22:22:30 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/521ise/bingingand_liking_it/
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I'd been restricting to 1100 kcal/day for the past week (TDEE is 1650-ish) and was feeling pretty okay, but a few hours ago I started feeling RAVENOUSLY hungry. Not as in craving something sweet but stuffing my mouth with all kinds of weird shit - chickpeas, greek yogurt, veggie burgers, black olives, tofu, that kinda stuff, you know?
It was really different from my "old" binges, though. Usually, if I start eating something or prepare a plate of food I always finish it. But today I only ate a piece of the veggie burger, a few tablespoons of the chickpeas and about a half of the tofu (although I shamelessly devoured the yoghurt and olives haha), then put everything away which leads me to think it wasn't really a binge but more of a 'reactive eating' thing? I wasn't feeling stuffed or guilty afterwards, just satiated and calm.
Anyways, the weirdest thing - it's been a few hours and I've since cleaned my whole room, made my bed, got dressed up, taken my meds and started memorising the periodic table while occasionally jumping around the room and rearranging furniture.
Is this how *normal* people feel all the time? I would love that tbh, but what's been happening is that I restrict for 4 or 5 days and then have a binge (or whatever it was) like this. I used to literally never binge, this is a recent thing (~2 months) and I think it's because I've been at a quite underweight BMI for a while. Has anyone else experienced this? Do you ever binge (or just eat a lot) without feeling guilty?
[Tip] I was doing so good. Period caused me to get off track. I can restrict pretty easily, but I want to do one fasting day without binging at the end of it. Any tips?
/u/TiredOfBeingFat_ [6'0"| CW251 |BMI34 | 22lost | GW130]
Created: Fri Sep 9 22:05:31 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/521gps/i_was_doing_so_good_period_caused_me_to_get_off/
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So I had a mini binge at dinner with my family today because the scale was already up like five pounds from last week. (I had little binges all week but I wasn't eating much more than maybe 2,000 cals) I figured most of the weight is water weight because my period does that to me. I was still fitting into my smaller pants so I'm praying it's water weight. I want to fast tomorrow succesfully. (I always break by like 7:00 pm and binge) I've got my coffee ready, plenty of vape juice, and plans to exercise with someone tomorrow. But how do I go about keeping myself from wandering into the kitchen when I get bored? I've got tonsss of thinspo ready to look at, but wondering if anyone has Any tricks they use?
And sorry if I sound crazy. I need to take my anxiety meds. Ha.
[Rant/Rave] I guess I shouldn't be surprised that my boyfriend doesn't find organizing rigid plans comforting like I do, but it's still disappointing.
/u/kpatable [5'9" | 124.6 | 18.1/18.4 | -22.4 | F]
Created: Fri Sep 9 20:32:38 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5214dh/i_guess_i_shouldnt_be_surprised_that_my_boyfriend/
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Like, I hate the experience of having someone get overwhelmed or annoyed when I'm asking them lots of questions and trying to get lots of details about something. I just want to *understand* and/or *prepare*.
Basically, my boyfriend said he wanted us to plan what we'd do on our upcoming weekend together. So I went full ham and made a time table. I asked him all kinds of questions, got into specifics, and basically made a plan for every hour of the day on Sunday. This comforts me *a lot*, and I was disappointed and honestly kind of upset when I realized it overwhelmed him. And it especially annoyed me since he said *he wanted to plan*. Idk. I got excited, but he got overwhelmed because *he decided* to look up when his cafeteria was open, and then Arceus forbid we have to do something else about dinner since the cafeteria wasn't open during my scheduled eating time. Idk. It's just really annoying and frustrating and I want to scream into my pillow and/or cry.
Also, being enthusiastic about something and having that enthusiasm overwhelm or scare people just cuts me deep because of how it's happened to me so much in my life.
[Rant/Rave] Vent aka "The Volatile Glory of ED & Emotions" as experienced by yours truly.
/u/vhenah [5'7 | 139.2 | 21.73 | -81 | MOO]
Created: Fri Sep 9 20:11:10 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5211aw/vent_aka_the_volatile_glory_of_ed_emotions_as/
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I promised myself that I would fast today, technically I started fasting yesterday and made it a full 24hrs - AS PLANNED. Nothing was wrong. Everything was fine. I broke my fast and ate and I immediately start crying - no warning, just a sudden tidal wave of 'why are you eating? what are you doing? this is wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong'. So for 20 minutes I cried and ate. I've never felt more unhinged tbh, I always feel guilty after I eat but it's never hit me this strongly in the moment. But the whole time I was thinking: "I completed my fast, this was my plan why do I feel this way???"
tldr;; I feel so out of control by eating one meal and my emotions are not helping. This is a pretty useless post, I'm sorry.
[Meme/Humor] Meirl
/u/pungentthrowaway [5'1" | CW: 154 | -13 | F]
Created: Fri Sep 9 19:04:49 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/520rpc/meirl/
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https://i.redd.it/fqvri8ypnlkx.jpg
[Discussion] I just want my thighs to not clap for me when I run 😭
/u/rukittenmerightnow
Created: Fri Sep 9 18:45:35 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/520ou5/i_just_want_my_thighs_to_not_clap_for_me_when_i/
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GW: 100
Current: 118
Been eating 600 or less calories a day running a few miles +lots of tea ☕️
300 cals on lazy days haha
10k tomorrow! I'm excited 🙂
Thank you for reading, I'd love to hear some of your daily intakes and GWs ☺️
[Rant/Rave] Scale makes me cry
/u/Logistikon [5'1'' | CW 93.0 lbs | 17.57/18.35 | -10.0 | F]
Created: Fri Sep 9 18:12:12 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/520jpv/scale_makes_me_cry/
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Not because of my current weight, although I'm not completely happy with that either (but I've lost about 10 pounds in a couple months, so I feel pretty good about that).
It's a fancy digital scale that I bought a few years ago when I was 84.2 pounds, and the scale reminds me of my weight GAIN from that "starting weight" every single time I step on. This morning, I was feeling pretty pleased with myself, then that stupid last setting had to tell me "+9.4 lbs" and it crushed me. My goal this time is to stop and maintain at 88, so I don't even want to get back down to 84, but that stupid scale is going to taunt me every time I step on.
[Discussion] At what BMI/point do your symptoms really start interfering with your life?
/u/Vegan_mermaid [5'2" | 91.0 | F]
Created: Fri Sep 9 17:09:18 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5209vf/at_what_bmipoint_do_your_symptoms_really_start/
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I've been in a restricting phase for about 9 months now. I don't feel that my BMI is all that low (17.6 according to the sidebar calculator, 17.0 according to my M.D.); I've been lower although it's been a very very long time. (Normally I stall out and reverse direction at a weight of about 97lb. I'm 92lb now, flair's not updated)
Anyway, these are some of the new symptoms that have surfaced in the last couple of weeks:
* Feeling unbearably cold unless I'm in >80 degree temps (it used to get better for a couple of days after a binge, but last Friday I binged and I was cold again two days later)
* Fatigued to the point of having trouble talking
* Having to force myself to drink water, even though normally I'm always thirsty/hydrating
* My halitosis is out. of. control. I've had bad breath for a while (ate keto for like 3 years prior to this relapse; that morphed into starvation-breath and it's seriously like...permeating my apartment now. This also used to go away for like a day after a binge but for the past few months, bingeing doesn't bring about a reprieve)
* Tooth pain / sensitivity to cold?!?! I'm not c/sing and I've never purged
* I'm suuuuper sensitive to smells. I can smell wheat thins, for example, that my co-worker 25+ feet away is eating
I'm wondering if these are directly related to restricting, OR to my BMI, OR just due to how long I've been restricting, OR if I'm just being a big baby. **What are your experiences -- is there a certain BMI / length of time restricting that you reach and start having a lot of symptoms?**
[Rant/Rave] It's hard being the fat friend
/u/okaysivan [5'3" | f | ∞ lbs.]
Created: Fri Sep 9 15:14:03 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51zq2p/its_hard_being_the_fat_friend/
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God this is probably so fucking dumb, but I just had to get it out there. Tinder created this new program as a part of their app called Tinder Social, where you and a group of friends can match with another group of friends. My friend thought it would be a great way to troll for parties so another friend and I joined her group and... Fuck guys. I'm so hurt right now. Like I know that my friends are both so much thinner and prettier than me, but people are fucking brutal. Nothing like being completely ignored in a group chat and then having "hey fatty" pop up on your screen to kill your ego. My friends reassure me that they think I'm beautiful (my one art history major friend once even went on a drunk tearful monologue about how we were all so beautiful and each fit the stereotypical epitome of beauty for at least one time period lmao), but I just can't feel it. Even when I get compliments or try to build myself up, it's like there's such a dissonance between what my brain thinks and what my heart thinks. Sorry, this was kinda an odd tangent. It just really does suck having friends who are so much more attractive than me. Like, I love them to death but it blows being a 4 surrounded by 9's.
At least this gives me more motivation to lose weight haha.
[Intro] After lurking for a few days, I'm going to start restricting again. Tips?
/u/Alchy-mist [5'7 | cw:180 | -25 | cg:140 | bmi:28 | F]
Created: Fri Sep 9 14:51:15 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51zlwi/after_lurking_for_a_few_days_im_going_to_start/
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[removed]
Looking for an ED buddy
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Sep 9 14:42:37 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51zkch/looking_for_an_ed_buddy/
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[removed]
[Other] Alcohol is the enemy
/u/kibi_kibi [5'6" | 146 | 23.6 | GW 127 | F]
Created: Fri Sep 9 14:14:23 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51zff5/alcohol_is_the_enemy/
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http://imgur.com/a/53FIo
[Help] Fatigue
/u/hazelconner [5'4" | 179.6 | 34.0% BF | -10.4 | X/F]
Created: Fri Sep 9 14:10:19 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51zept/fatigue/
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Finally after struggling to lose weight I cut my calories down to about 1300-1400 starting Monday. And like I haven't had a day where I burned less than 2500 in two weeks. Sometimes it's closer to 3000. And fatigue hit me so hard today. I've worked out five out of the last 6 days too. So I don't know which is making it worse.
Should I eat more so I can go to taekwondo? I haven't gone to class in weeks. Or should I rest. I can't tell what I should do. I don't trust myself. Part of me says stop eating so little. The other part doesn't believe that part.
[Discussion] Is it wrong that I don't believe this article?
/u/gingerbiscuity [5'5 | 112 | 18.60 | F/25]
Created: Fri Sep 9 13:03:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51z2oa/is_it_wrong_that_i_dont_believe_this_article/
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http://indy100.independent.co.uk/article/these-sidebyside-photos-expose-a-major-misconception-about-dieting--bygskBZRodb
[Intro] Intro/bio/rant/rave lol
/u/morose_adipose [5'2 | 90lbs | 17.05% | F]
Created: Fri Sep 9 12:48:03 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51yzwi/introbiorantrave_lol/
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I didn't know what to title it, lol.
But here I am. I've been a lurker, finally got the courage to start replying a few times, feel comfortable here now so figured I'd post an intro.
I'm 41, probably the oldest one here. I've struggled with disordered eating most of my life. Was diagnosed with anorexia/bulimia as a teen, was treated, and then have successfully relapsed numerous times over the years. My highest weight was probably close to 200 lbs. After being on medications for various things, I stopped giving a single fuck and decided if I was going to gain weight from the meds then I'd just come to terms with being obese and die fat and happy. Except, slowly the disordered thoughts started creeping back in and I embraced them, stopped taking my meds, and have lost over 100lbs this year. (Yay! That's my rave.)
The more I lose, the more I just want to keep going. I have no one in my life. Well, I have a couple of friends but none of them really know about my ED as they live in other states and don't see me, and I don't talk about it with them. The only person who knew, and tried to help me with it, cut me out of his life so I've just decided this is how I will die, and I'm okay with that. I know that sounds blunt, and if you asked me if I'm suicidal, I'd say no...I'm really not, but in the back of my head, where the tiny speck of logic lies, I know I'm killing myself if I continue this but I can no longer be forced to care. I literally have nothing or no one to live for besides my dogs...who truly are the only reason I haven't given up completely. I don't know, my life is a mess lol.
So, that's me. My rant is that I'm going to a birthday party tomorrow and I'm going to have to face my nemesis...cake. I've not caved once since I began this current journey into ED hell. Hopefully tomorrow I can say the same thing. I specifically don't allow myself to have anything even remotely "dangerous" no matter how small of a portion because I don't want to trigger any kind of binge/purge cycle.
Other rant, I need it to hurry up and be winter so I can hide in hoodies and pants. People are starting to badger me about losing too much and I just want to shrink away and become invisible without anyone noticing and commenting.
So, that's my weird, rambly intro. Great to "meet" everyone.
[Discussion] Fitbits
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Sep 9 12:30:16 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51ywko/fitbits/
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[deleted]
[Other] A meme triggered me lol
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Sep 9 12:08:01 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51ysfn/a_meme_triggered_me_lol/
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[deleted]
[Discussion] ED and sex
/u/ED2134 [168cm | fat | female| -6kg]
Created: Fri Sep 9 12:05:36 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51yrzq/ed_and_sex/
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So I'm wondering if it is just me or a general ED thing.
In generall I like sex. But I hate to have sex.
All i can think about is: How do I look? please don't touch my belly, does my ass giggle? It is really really hard for me to get in the mood and enjoy sex.
Anybody else? Any tips on how to overcome this?
[Rant/Rave] she's going to regret that promise
/u/gin-and-lemon [🐝 5'1"| cw: 155lbs | bmi: 30 | -7lbs | f ]
Created: Fri Sep 9 11:56:56 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51yqak/shes_going_to_regret_that_promise/
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ever since i hit puberty and started to get chubby, my moms been after me to lose weight. when just calling me fat and telling me to work out didn't work, she promised me that if i dropped weight she would buy me a new wardrobe. to this day, she has maintained that if i get to 125-130, she will buy me that new wardrobe. once i get in the 120's, she's gonna regret that promise. :)
[Discussion] What do you think of "intuitive eating?"
/u/kpatable [5'9" | 124.6 | 18.1/18.4 | -22.4 | F]
Created: Fri Sep 9 11:52:05 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51ypd4/what_do_you_think_of_intuitive_eating/
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**The following is just what I think about it; you can just skip it and only answer the question if you want.**
So, since I'm in limbo between disorder and recovery right now, things at both ends of the spectrum interest me. And like, my therapist has thrown the phrase "intuitive eating" at me a few times. And, obviously, this is toted as the ideal way to eat and maintain weight. And your body has a natural set point at which your weight will stay around if you eat intuitively. So, with my understanding of intuitive eating, it makes sense to me how that would ease some of the stress of eating because you just listen to your body and let it regulate itself.
But what if you want to be at a certain weight? Is that a thing thrown at body builders or models? I.e. is it thrown at people who made the *choice* to make their body look a certain way?
I don't know. I guess the point of recovery is to stop caring about your weight, but like... I feel that *some* control is needed, ESPECIALLY nowadays with all the horrendously unhealthy food in the world. But I also can understand that, for people with full blown eating disorders, this small amount of control has blown up into a disorder. And so, like addicts, maybe it's not even safe for us to exert enough control to make our weights a certain way? I don't know. I don't know.
I'm pretty sure I don't want to fully recover. I want to be physically healthy, but I don't want to give up my thin body. Controlling how I look is worth the trouble, imo. But whateverrrrrrrrrr this is confusing T\^T
[Help] How do I hide my weight loss from my psychiatrist? Kind of freaking out... Fuck
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Sep 9 11:46:37 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51yob9/how_do_i_hide_my_weight_loss_from_my_psychiatrist/
---
[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] When you realize your favorite ~~thinspo~~ fashion model is nearly the same size as you
/u/Alice_Rebel [5'10" | 126.3 | 17.67 | -3.7 | Trans F]
Created: Fri Sep 9 11:44:32 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51ynxd/when_you_realize_your_favorite_thinspo_fashion/
---
But then you realize that your chest will never get smaller then 38" because you had to go through puberty as a boi.
The model is Nicole Pollard btw.
Lawls formatting doesn't work on titles
[Rant/Rave] Never ever losing (rant)
/u/voidnasp [153cm | CW 63kg | 28.28 | -5kg | F]
Created: Fri Sep 9 11:10:25 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51yhm9/never_ever_losing_rant/
---
Sorry I can't flair, I'm on mobile right now, I will fix this this evening. Also this is my first time making a post of my own here (not just replying) so if I'm being inappropriate please let me know and I'll delete this. I just need to get this out of my chest, I'm so angry at myself at the moment.
I was finally doing kind of great, after MONTHS of maintaining at the same weight, losing 0.2kg (about 0.5 lb I think) and gaining the double back the next day, trying to fast and failing, trying to walk one hour a day under the sun when it's 37°C outside or to drink more water all that for nothing, I was finally beginning to lose weight, I'd finally lost 1kg. I was so happy to have a positive result to all of this.
And in one evening it just went away. I went to a restaurant with my friends yesterday night, and I have that rule that if I'm with people and it's time to eat or if I'm socially in a situation where I have to eat, then I will eat, instead of trying to restrict or avoid having a good time with my friends. I tried to make the healthiest choices but when we finished the meal and for back home, damn, I could feel it. I ate too much, it was to much, I felt horrible. And this morning, I gained 1kg back. This insignificant kg I just lost, that I was so happy to see gone, it was back. I paid for that 1kg of fat yesterday.
So today I didn't eat, a water fast, that's what I needed. But then I come back home from work, I step on the scale and it's still the same f-ing number, it's like I did all of this for nothing, like I'm back to square one. I try to calm myself, that it's surely just water weight or something but damn, it hurts so much. It's like all my efforts are just gone and I'm condemned to stay at this weight. I was so angry that I broke my fast and ate 240 kcal as if I wanted to punish myself, or at least gain weight for something, so it could make sense. But I regret it so much. At least I managed to stop before it turns into a binge session...
Now I just want to cry or go walk for hours to eliminate what I just ate. 240 kcal shouldn't be a big deal, I didn't realized how desperate I have become to lose weight. I don't know what to do anymore.
[Rant/Rave] this is so fucked up, but i don't know who else i can tell.
/u/tallgirlthrowaway13 [72.5" | 178 | 22.8 | 12 | F]
Created: Fri Sep 9 11:09:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51yhi8/this_is_so_fucked_up_but_i_dont_know_who_else_i/
---
i originally met my best friend (i'm in the mid-atlantic/US and she's in west coast canada) on tumblr through weightloss/thinspo blogs. we've known each other for about four years now, and we've both cycled a lot in weight since we first started talking. when we met for the first time in early 2014, i was about 170 and she was around 145-150 (i'm 6' and some change, and she's 5'10"). she lost about 20lbs by the end of 2014, when we met up again. i was about 165 at this time, and she was pretty badly disordered at this point - very into modelling, so i think that affected her body image.
fast forward to now - i haven't seen her in nearly two years. i'm feeling like a fat lard sitting here at 180 and she's about 150. from what i've been told, she's pretty much recovered and happy with where she is, while that couldn't be further from the truth for me. we're tentatively making plans for new year's, which has really thrown my restriction into high gear. according to losertown, i could be at around 150 by december if i stick to 1000 calories a day, which is doable. it's all i can think about. i was at 700 calories yesterday afternoon and i had a bite of my boyfriend's full-fat ice cream last evening and immediately purged it in the shower before he could get home.
i've flirted with my ed before and always struggled with restriction, but now my focus is crystal clear. i need to get to 150 by december, if not lower.
she'll always be prettier than me, and she's a model, but damn it, i want to be thinner for once.
[Goal] Day 3 of my 10 day fast.
/u/stephanynotstokes [5'5| too fat |-76 lbs | F]
Created: Fri Sep 9 10:47:45 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51ydhr/day_3_of_my_10_day_fast/
---
I felt like I was going crazy. The more I fasted, the heavier I felt. I felt I looked even bigger. And even though Usually when I fast I don't weigh in order to surprise myself later. But I broke down and it turns out I lost 2 pounds!
So! Now I'm going to relax and fast.
How's everyone else doing?
[Discussion] Queer folks: DAE feel like you can't come out until you reach your UGW?
/u/TinyTinyCleverCDR [156 cm | 52.5 kg | 22.45 | -6 kg | F]
Created: Fri Sep 9 10:32:15 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51yamf/queer_folks_dae_feel_like_you_cant_come_out_until/
---
I've known I'm gay for years, but never came out because... well, what's the point? Who in their right mind would date me? I don't want to try to get a girlfriend until I'm small, dainty, beautiful. Because being pretty is the only thing that could make up for everything else that's wrong with me.
It freaks my friends out, though. I've never dated. I'm too chicken to ask a girl and too honest to lead on a guy. My friends keep trying to "fix" this by constantly trying to set me up with guys. I know they mean well, but it just makes me feel worse. And my family won't stop harping on me to get a husband before I'm too old.
Anyone else go through this? How do you handle it?
[Meme/Humor] Taxi Driver is everything
/u/bloodketosexmagic
Created: Fri Sep 9 10:25:42 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51y9g7/taxi_driver_is_everything/
---
https://media.giphy.com/media/8Ev0qB6EEqgNO/giphy.gif
[Meme/Humor] Another Cards Against Humanity ED edition game going on!
/u/AbandonEarth [:'(]
Created: Fri Sep 9 10:15:44 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51y7lw/another_cards_against_humanity_ed_edition_game/
---
Using /u/throwaway912837198's deck from [this thread](https://www.reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51uy8t/proed_cards_against_humanity/), if you're not busy and want a good laugh then you should come play!
http://pyx-2.pretendyoure.xyz/zy/game.jsp#game=42
password: small
[Discussion] Daily Food Diary! September 09, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Fri Sep 9 10:02:42 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51y58b/daily_food_diary_september_09_2016/
---
This is a daily food diary thread for September 09, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
[Discussion] Stupid bulimia problems
/u/Mi__ra [165cm |50 kg | 18.6 | 0 | F]
Created: Fri Sep 9 09:50:37 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51y2ze/stupid_bulimia_problems/
---
I accidentally bought see-through trash bags. Now my neighbors can see how much crap I eat.
I have to rotate stores. If I go to the same store a few days in a row, I have to choose a line based on who is the cashier, because I don't want to go to the same one several days in row. They start to look you funny.
Do you have any stuff that's not directly about your ED, but about what it causes you to do?
[Thinspo] Artsy thinspo
/u/taeyeons-comrade [perpetual shame]
Created: Fri Sep 9 09:44:53 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51y1zo/artsy_thinspo/
---
http://imgur.com/a/dCZSD
[Intro] A new beginning and a return.
/u/aerienne [5'5" | 138 | 23.2 | -32 | F]
Created: Fri Sep 9 09:11:14 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51xvtd/a_new_beginning_and_a_return/
---
I've been here a long time but clear my history and disappear for while sometimes. I have a background story, but that's for another time. Here's the now:
* I'm an au pair in Paris for the next year.
* I cook for the kids and have to eat dinner with them every night.
* The kids are so skinny (12, 14, 15). The eldest girl is so fucking Parisian chic, it kills me.
* The family goes out to eat at least once a week and I have to go with.
* I'm gym-less, scale-less, and gained about 5-8 pounds since my LW a few months ago.
I feel huge again and I'm frustrated because this is the perfect time for a fresh start. Ideally this is how things would go:
* Just coffee in the morning (decaf in the afternoon). A light snack during the day because I'll have classes. A piece of fruit or a high-quality small pastry if anything.
* Eat a bit of dinner with the kids. Have them think I have stomach issues and don't eat a lot at once. Working so far. Not really eating during the day means this can be my main meal.
* Get salads and light food if I go out to eat with them.
* Don't keep food in my apartment. Just coffee and cream and sugar. That's all I need.
* Walk everywhere. No metro unless it's pouring rain and I'm going far. Even then, that's what umbrellas and coats are for.
I'm just anxious because I don't have a scale or laxatives or full length mirror. Everything I depended on is gone.
Sorry for the negativity. I just feel like the frumpy American and I need to take advantage of the situation.
[Tip] Do something every day for 3 weeks straight to make it become habit.
/u/kpatable [5'9" | 124.6 | 18.1/18.4 | -22.4 | F]
Created: Fri Sep 9 08:57:01 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51xt6t/do_something_every_day_for_3_weeks_straight_to/
---
I saw this in LifeProTips. Not going to x-post because you know why. But yeah. I just thought it would help everyone here. Because, knowing this, you know you'll only have to exert a lot of energy to make the change for three weeks and not the rest of your life, since, after those three weeks, it will have become habitual. Just thought this sub could find this helpful since we can get discouraged easily sometimes :[ And because changing eating habits is fucking hard -__-
[Rant/Rave] Gained at Burning Man
/u/Tay-tertot
Created: Fri Sep 9 08:25:17 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51xnp2/gained_at_burning_man/
---
HOW?
Nobody gains there. But I did.
I know the majority is water-weight (since I am down about 6-7 pounds in the past few days) but FCK.
I'm still UP about 7 pounds from when I left.
Fasting NOW. Not stopping until I'm at least back to 125.
[Help] Trying to control my friends weight
/u/foodfornot [5'3" | 120lbs | BMI 21.3 | -20 | GW 105 | F]
Created: Fri Sep 9 08:15:15 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51xlte/trying_to_control_my_friends_weight/
---
I'm not sure if I'm really shallow or controlling or both, but I hate when my friends eat a lot... Like I purposely don't eat or have something super low calorie around them to try to shame them or set an example because I know I could never say anything.
Recently one of my friends told me she wanted to do a pre-packaged meal plan like medifast. I use medifast food sometimes because it's high in protein and just 100 cal so I was super supportive. She asked for advice and I gave it, spilling my guts on how I lose weight, what works for me, etc... And then she did nothing!!! She keeps saying she is putting off her diet "til after July 4... after August..." It's driving me crazy! She gained a ton of weight (like 30-40lbs) since college and looks awful. It disgusts me just thinking about how fat she's getting and how she's doing nothing. She's otherwise a super nice and fun person and I hate that I have these awful thoughts about her, but I don't know how to stop. WTF is wrong with me? Any advice?
UPDATE: I just wanted to add that I've been in her position before. I gained 20 pounds and and then lost it and losing the weight made me sooo happy! I'm not sure if I want to lose it again through other people or maybe I'm just a shallow bitch but either way, I realize this kind of thinking is not healthy.
[Discussion] C/S.. how many calories am I REALLY getting?
/u/mckenziemudkip [5'2 | CW:109(-21) GW:88 | BMI 20.45| F/20]
Created: Fri Sep 9 07:33:26 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51xeg7/cs_how_many_calories_am_i_really_getting/
---
So, I was binging and purging A LOT. And decided to chew and spit for damage control. Not knowing the exact calories I'm taking in is a little nerve racking. Buuuut I figure its better then knowing that I'm taking in 5,000+ during my binges.
My real question is, what percentage of the calories do you guys think I get from doing this?
My routine goes something like this:
I eat lettuce and low cal dressing, and drink 16oz 0 cal green tea. Then I C/S, rinsing my mouth between bites, and then sipping water between. I feel VERY full after doing this. I think I'm tricking my brain that I'm eating all these things, because my appetite is going down and I'm craving less. I don't feel like I'm deprived, you know?
Anybody here that C/S regularly that loses weight? Or the opposite? I'd appreciate to hear your experiences.
[Goal] Omg! I've almost reached my first milestone!
/u/heartbrokenandok [5'7"-ish | 198.4 | 31-ish | -23.4 | F]
Created: Fri Sep 9 07:28:22 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51xdmd/omg_ive_almost_reached_my_first_milestone/
---
For those who don't know me around here, I'm either a binger or a restricter. Sometimes together, usually not. Over the past two years I binged and binged and worked my way up from about 175 to about 230. Then my boyfriend left me (sucks), then he started dating some 80lb teenager (fucking bitch), and then I got real about the joke I always told him about how "if you ever break up with me Im going to lose a bunch of weight and get really hot".
So since about March I've been trying, and not always succeeding, to restrict and lose weight and go to the gym and get in shape, and most of all not binge. But the progress has been way slower than I would have liked, and between visiting my parents ans starting a new job I got totally off track and unfocused and have been too afraid to weigh myself.
But this last week I have started to refocus on my goals and restrict and do everything right. And it paid off this morning.
When I weighed myself on tuesday I was 207.0lbs flat. Absolutely no significant loss from the 207.8lbs I weighed in at on July 7th. But this morning, I stepped out of the shower and onto the scale and to my surprise it read 200.8lbs! That's 0.8lbs away from my first milestone of "get below 200lbs", and almost 30lbs lost from what I assume was my high weight (April 15, 2016 start weight recorded as 221.8lbs)
That's still 21lbs lost since April! I feel so much prettier and lighter just knowing that by next week I'll no longer have to start my weight with a 2! Yay!
I'm having such a good day! Happy Friday everyone!
Calling all cold girls& guys, 5 calorie hot chocolate , I repeat 5 calorie hot chocolate.
/u/Nude-prude [5"6.5 | 103.4 lbls | 16.42|-40| female]
Created: Fri Sep 9 06:40:32 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51x69q/calling_all_cold_girls_guys_5_calorie_hot/
---
http://imgur.com/bqpGCIc
[Discussion] Weekly Selfie, Progress Pic and OOTD Thread! September 09, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Fri Sep 9 06:03:17 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51x15f/weekly_selfie_progress_pic_and_ootd_thread/
---
This is the weekly picture thread for September 09, 2016.
Feel free to share your selfies, progress pics or outfit-of-the-day (OOTD) pics in this thread!
**Rules**
1. Be nice, **or you will be banned.**
2. Please use [imgur](http://imgur.com/) as a host.
Consider adding commentary on featured brands, sizing, inspiration behind your OOTD (trying to look thin or cover up weightloss, etc.)!
**Remember that anyone can view the contents of this thread even if they are banned from this subreddit. If you receive unwanted messages, please contact the mods with a screenshot of the relevant messages. Note that even if we ban people, they can still message you, and they still have access to the contents of this subreddit. The best thing for you to do is to block them.**
*****
Selfie, progress pic and OOTD threads are posted every Friday.
Have any questions or concerns? Comment below, or [PM the mods.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FproED)
[Thinspo] My favourite instagram thinspos.
/u/tinylunacat [165cm|60kg|GW:45kg| Female]
Created: Fri Sep 9 05:07:07 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51wu82/my_favourite_instagram_thinspos/
---
http://imgur.com/a/BuqlT
[Rant/Rave] I am going to the gym, and will take it easy with my new routine. Then, I am going to the park, parking my butt on the grass in the sun, and I am going to think long and hard about my situation and how to fix it.
/u/smokesanddietcokes [Doesn't actually know what she's talking about.]
Created: Fri Sep 9 04:14:18 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51wo9z/i_am_going_to_the_gym_and_will_take_it_easy_with/
---
Fuck this.
No more binging. No more overeating. No more weight gain.
I can do this.
See you, lovelies <3
[Help] What's the lowest amount of calories you have gained weight on?
/u/Itsemurha [177cm|CW 67kg| GW: 55kg | SW:120kg |20.9| F]
Created: Fri Sep 9 03:07:02 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51wh9h/whats_the_lowest_amount_of_calories_you_have/
---
I ate two kiwifruit with my vitamins/medication for breakfast, a massive salad today at 2pm (370 cal with tuna, ranch dressing and veggie toppings) which adds to about 550-600 calories for the day including calories from vitamins, coffee, tea and then a mini butterfinger. ((much regret eating that ;_; )) Currently trying to rationalise with my hysteric ED brain that I shouldn't gain weight on that when my current BMR is nearly 1,000 calories more than what I ate today and I don't need to purge the tea I just drank or what is probably left of the salad I ate hours ago because salad is ok to eat dammit. FFFFFF
[Rant/Rave] Anyone else do this? [Rant, kind of]
/u/electille [5'7 | 123 | 19.2 | ?]
Created: Fri Sep 9 01:20:02 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51w6ig/anyone_else_do_this_rant_kind_of/
---
Hi, it's been a while. I had a "recovery" last year but I still slip into restricting whenever I'm stressed, upset, angry, sad, depressed, any negative thing really.
Just got told by a guy who I had just started dating that he doesn't feel any special connection, even though he's always been the one to initiate contact, both online and intimate.
Needless to say, I feel shitty and used.
So I've turned back to restricting to make myself feel some kind of distraction from the bad feelings. Does anybody else do this? :( it's more of a coping mechanism than an eating disorder, something my therapist refused to acknowledge when we were going through recovery last year.
I feel like there's no way I'll rid myself of this way to cope. It feels so good and legitimately makes me feel better for a while.
[Meme/Humor] Aiming for both I think
/u/Eyes_Couldnt_Lie
Created: Thu Sep 8 22:11:55 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51vjz4/aiming_for_both_i_think/
---
http://i.imgur.com/MWv8J0T.jpg
Sustaining your ED?
/u/behindthearmory
Created: Thu Sep 8 21:26:43 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51vdf5/sustaining_your_ed/
---
[removed]
Spent $220 on groceries... (TW?)
/u/Hi_ilikerocks
Created: Thu Sep 8 20:44:19 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51v6yx/spent_220_on_groceries_tw/
---
Sorry I'm on mobile and can't flair!
Tonight I spent $220 on groceries for my boyfriend and I, and I couldn't be happier. I know lots of you get triggered from going home with a TON of food but for me I feel so at ease. Everything I got was super low cal save for some treats for the boyfriend, and now I feel so in control of my ED. No more binging on crap, no more eating fast food and frozen meals. I can count everything out and eat filling healthy fresh meals, and I just feel so relieved. Sorry this post is pointless, I'm just very happy about this and felt like I had to share.
[Discussion] I think I may have PCOS
/u/lightfeathers [5'4" | CW 114 | GW 95 | F]
Created: Thu Sep 8 20:22:56 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51v3jv/i_think_i_may_have_pcos/
---
I have almost all symptoms. I used to be overweight but heavily restricting helped me a ton. I know I shouldn't wish that I do have PCOS but at the same time, it's comforting to know that it's not ALL my fault.
I'm going to the doctor next week though but for now, I have a few questions.
For people with PCOS on here, what do you guys eat? I'm thinking of starting the keto diet again and see how that works out for me. How does PCOS affect you? What do you do about it?
[Help] How do you stop your stomach from growling?
/u/kooraloo [5'2 | fat as fuck | F]
Created: Thu Sep 8 20:14:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51v2az/how_do_you_stop_your_stomach_from_growling/
---
During summer break, restricting was easy. If my stomach growled, I could drink a lot of water (or tea, or crystal light juice) and stop the growling. Now that I'm back at school, I can't do that as much-- if I drink too much, then I have to go to the bathroom. And i'm so uncomfortable getting up in front of the class and walking the entire length of the front room and disrupting the lecture. My stomach growling is SO LOUD it has actually interrupted lectures. I've started to eat more in anticipation of the growling... which makes me feel sleepy and bloated and just ugh.
proud of myself, it's the small victories
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Sep 8 19:59:43 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51uztv/proud_of_myself_its_the_small_victories/
---
[deleted]
[Other] ProED Cards Against Humanity
/u/throwaway912837198 [5'8" | 112 | 17 | F]
Created: Thu Sep 8 19:49:19 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51uy8t/proed_cards_against_humanity/
---
I started working on a custom Card's Against Humanity deck. It's here: https://www.cardcastgame.com/browse/deck/9EQPA and largely drawn from this [deck on MyProAna](https://www.cardcastgame.com/browse/deck/3DFPF).
Let me know your card suggestions! We can play it online at http://pretendyoure.xyz by typing "/addcardcast 9EQPA" to add this deck.
Just a warning - the content is supposed to be shocking/self-referential, but if anything in particular bothers you please let me know in this post or by PM and I'll remove it ASAP.
**edit:** I started a game here: http://pyx-3.pretendyoure.xyz/zy/game.jsp#game=5 the password is "halotop"
**edit 2:** The game's ended now. It was pretty successful for a first try! Everybody feel free to use (and add to) the deck and host games with it.
[Discussion] Do lots of weight fluctuations cause diabetes?
/u/taeyeons-comrade [perpetual shame]
Created: Thu Sep 8 19:42:21 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51ux67/do_lots_of_weight_fluctuations_cause_diabetes/
---
So I was just watching youtube videos and scrolling through comments and one person commented that losing and gaining weight really fast is unhealthy and can cause diabetes (they also said this is what happened to Tom Hanks??).
Naturally I'm a pro at this. I'm constantly gaining and losing like crazy so I was curious about whether this is true, since I don't trust people in youtube comments.
Fasting on my period...
/u/salamanderqueen [5'9"| CW: 149 | SW: 180 | GW: 120 | -31 | 19F]
Created: Thu Sep 8 19:37:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51uwcb/fasting_on_my_period/
---
Is a lot easier when I'm in too much pain to even think about food :)
I have 200g brown cup mushrooms that I need to cook. Recipe ideas?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Sep 8 19:36:52 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51uwar/i_have_200g_brown_cup_mushrooms_that_i_need_to/
---
[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] Soup or beer? Soup or beeeer?? D:
/u/MissMagus
Created: Thu Sep 8 18:51:04 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51uoyf/soup_or_beer_soup_or_beeeer_d/
---
I have a can of 180 cal veggie soup, and one big ass can of Miller lite at 198 cal.
I want them both so bad. But I really wanted to stay at 200 today. Originally I planned for the soup, but I got a really bad craving to just drink, smoke a little, and draw a bunch of weird shit cause I've had hella bad artists block lately.... SO I went a picked up a beer. The entire walk home I was convinced i was gonna drink that instead. BUT NOW I'M HOME and trying to make up my mind. But. I. Dont. Fucking. Know.
Which would you choose?!
Not gonna lie the beer will probably win, but still....I've been anticipating that fucking soup all damn day.
Blahrjwignsjtjrghhhh.
I never see myself from this angle, so I was surprised when I didn't hate it
/u/MeMyselfAndCarbs [5'3" | 112 | F]
Created: Thu Sep 8 18:47:10 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51uobh/i_never_see_myself_from_this_angle_so_i_was/
---
http://imgur.com/1PYqduc
[Help] Hoping moving to a new apartment will help
/u/highlikeplanes2 [5'6 | 120 | 19.7 | F]
Created: Thu Sep 8 18:40:12 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51un65/hoping_moving_to_a_new_apartment_will_help/
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Hi everyone! Longterm lurker here, finally have something to contribute! I just moved to a tiny (and when I say tiny I mean...minuscule) studio apartment in NYC. I have a small stove and refrigerator, but nothing substantial, and I'm hoping this will help with my binging. I'm coming from a place where I could cook whatever I wanted and where I had a car and easy access to junk food. I'm hoping my lack of kitchen/storage + my aversion to spending money will help me fast easier!
Has anyone else experienced a shift in their eating habits after a move?
When is the ideal time to weigh yourself? For accuracy
/u/rukittenmerightnow
Created: Thu Sep 8 18:11:20 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51uifk/when_is_the_ideal_time_to_weigh_yourself_for/
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https://www.reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51uifk/when_is_the_ideal_time_to_weigh_yourself_for/
[Rant/Rave] Nothing like commentary from Mom
/u/ThroeAwaymeron [5'2 | 107.6 | 20.39 | F]
Created: Thu Sep 8 18:10:25 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51uian/nothing_like_commentary_from_mom/
---
Okay, this is just a dumb rant, ignore at will.
I planned out this meal today really carefully. It was my only real meal today, 500 of 800 cals or so, so I was really, really looking forward to it. So my mom FaceTime calls me juuust as I sit down to eat...but that's a good thing, I thought, I wanted to talk to her earlier anyway. Blah blah, long story short she comments on me "gobbling up" my food.
GOBBLING UP. Like a fat fucking animal. Yep, that's me. A hog at the fucking trough for a tiny bowl of pasta that I've been saving cals all day for. Oink!
Well guess who's not fucking gobbling up anything tomorrow!?
[Discussion] High or low calorie count?
/u/zomboooo [5'7|115|18.1|-2|NB]
Created: Thu Sep 8 16:52:24 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51u5cs/high_or_low_calorie_count/
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Do you guys find losing weight easier on a high or low calorie count? I'm torn between eating 500 or 1000 calories a day due to the fact that I'm active but I want to lose weight fast
[Rant/Rave] Anyone else dreading the future?
/u/foodfornot [5'3" | 120lbs | BMI 21.3 | -20 | GW 105 | F]
Created: Thu Sep 8 16:46:12 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51u48l/anyone_else_dreading_the_future/
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I've had non-normative eating habits since I first fasted at 10 years old. Before that I was a chubby kid, and suddenly losing a bunch of weight right before middle school so drastically changed the way people responded to me, even my mom was proud. Since then I've gone through cycles of restricting, bingeing, trying to exercising it off.
I binge and gain and that makes me depressed, then once I'm really sad I restrict and become so happy, feel so great, that I forget myself. When I've been thin (and happy) long enough I start to slip back into normal eating, lose my progress, get fat, get sad, rinse and repeat. This past week I've lost 5 pounds. I'm 122 now and I will be 110 soon. I'll stay there for a few months, maybe a year, and then I know what will happen. I'm only good at restricting when I'm otherwise unhappy/ feeling hopeless/ lost. Sometimes I think -- if that's what it takes then I'd rather be thin and unhappy. It's better than the shame that comes after letting myself go.
[Goal] Size 0 in H&M?!
/u/minamasood [5'6.5"| hopeless| 22F]
Created: Thu Sep 8 16:10:00 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51txzj/size_0_in_hm/
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So this happened earlier today. I feel really anxious about it because I don't feel like I've earned it given how little I've been exercising.
I also went home and tried on my little sister's jeans which are sized 24 and 25 in Forever 21 and they fit. But I still feel and look overweight. I feel like my thighs are still the same size that they were 15ish lbs ago. It's honestly so confusing and I feel more upset than anything because I thought I would have been happy by now.
Birth Control Problems
/u/p5ychdelight
Created: Thu Sep 8 15:41:18 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51tsvi/birth_control_problems/
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I wasnt sure where to post this but the primary problem is to do with my eating so i thought here.
So I started taking birth control pills about 3 weeks ago as my boyfriend and I were sexually active. I noticed three side effects:
1) It improves my mood significantly (i suffer with depression and suicidal thoughts)
However
2) It messes up my sleep patterns (I wake up several times during the night)
3) It increases my appetite... which leads to me binging and wanting to eat constantly
My boyfriend and I have broken up so I dont really need to take them anymore. But I still have about a week left. Would it muck my body up if I stopped now? I just want to stop as I hate wanting to eat all the time but I dont want to damage my body. Can I just stop taking them or should I finish the course?
[Meme/Humor] My friend sent me this today...
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Sep 8 15:23:44 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51tppt/my_friend_sent_me_this_today/
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https://i.redd.it/fdx2wc8bfdkx.jpg
[Goal] Fasting <3
/u/tinyme23 [5'3" | 135 | 24.1 | -37 lbs | F]
Created: Thu Sep 8 15:22:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51tpg1/fasting_3/
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On the 3rd day of what I plan to be a 10-day water fast. Coconut La Croix and Vitamin Water Zeros are godsends.
I found out my best friend (tiny lady, 90 lbs soaking wet) bought a sparkly amazing gold dress to wear to a concert we're both going to next week and I'm fully freaking out. I'm hoping the fast will make me look like less of a sow next to her :/ but honestly I'm feeling so angry at her rn for stupid, disordered reasons. ughhhhhh
Last time we went out we were both wearing cute dresses & she got like 10 compliments from strangers (not kidding) and I got 0. Sigh. At least she's living, breathing, constant thinspo.
[Help] Gathering the motivation to exercise
/u/wearebulletproof [5'4 | fat | 20F🎀✨]
Created: Thu Sep 8 15:13:01 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51tnux/gathering_the_motivation_to_exercise/
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Obligatory on mobile, no flair disclaimer.
But guys. I'm lazy. Like, really lazy. All the time. The last time I seriously exercised was maaaaaaaaybe 3 years ago. And besides that, most of the time, I just have zero motivation to do anything other than lay in bed all day. 🙄
So, how do you get the motivation to get off your butt and just do it, especially on days you really don't feel like it? Share your secrets with this unmotivated Ruby~ 😁
[Intro] Maybe I'm in the wrong place
/u/hazelconner [5'4" | 179.6 | 34.0% BF | -10.4 | X/F]
Created: Thu Sep 8 15:11:41 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51tnmc/maybe_im_in_the_wrong_place/
---
I came here after I had purged two days in a row on vacation. Both after big meals where I told myself I would just stop eating. But I didn't. I don't think I actually ate more than anyone else but my head was spinning with how disgusting I was.
But that's the only time I've done it in a while. I think maybe a few other times this year. Mostly after meals out.
I don't know if I have an ED but I know I have a horrible relationship between me and my body and food.
I used to weigh 200 lbs in college with very little muscle. I didn't care. At all. Like I didn't feel gross or disgusting. At least not so deeply. I always struggled with weight. I'd been 165 in high school and dropped to 145 on Weight Watchers - spurred on by a mother who always made comments about my weight ("you're the heaviest girl in that dance class"). Or even one beautiful time my father screamed at me for overeating at Christmas Dinner. In front of family who already hated me for being queer so whatever.
I got down to 148 and I felt awesome. But then my health started getting bad. Chronic pain. Birth control. Everything started slowly spiraling. When I didn't have money or a stable job and was in the throes of anxiety is fantasize about cutting my fat off with a knife. I learned how to purge in a restaurant bathroom and was so proud of myself. I would take a ton of laxatives the day before I weighed myself.
When I did reach financial stability those feelings faded. But I gained more. Got sicker. Had a body beyond my control. I had pain I couldn't control. Fatigue I couldn't control. So I'm back at 190 and the fact that I gained a lot of muscle is little consolation tbh. I see the fat rolls, I feel them and they drive me crazy I want to carve myself up again.
And the worst part is, all the body positivity my friends are into just makes me feel like a failure twice over. I don't love my body. And it feels like I'm betraying something there too.
I don't know if I belong here but it feels safer than the places I've looked before.
(On mobile. I'm always on mobile)
How old are you?
/u/stinkyoldcheese [5'5 | 114 | 19.19 | -61 lbs | F]
Created: Thu Sep 8 14:53:26 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51tk74/how_old_are_you/
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I turned 23 this summer. I feel too old to still be struggling like this. I haven't belonged in purged since summer of last year but I'm not better and I'm not
[Rant/Rave] Frustrated with Doctors
/u/Alexa1p [5'5'' | 110 | 18 | -10.7 | F]
Created: Thu Sep 8 14:45:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51tisk/frustrated_with_doctors/
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My doctor refuses to give me ADHD medication that I've been sort of counting on (I've never been on it before, but I'm not very functional without it and I suspect it would help me a ton) to go back to school this fall. I think my main trigger that causes me to not eat is how little control I feel when I'm trying to focus on something and am just utterly incapable.
The doctor said my bmi was 17.9, which I don't think is that bad. But she said they don't give stimulants to people who are restricting, as it increases the chance of heart problems, plus they tend to suppress appetite. But I think getting medicated would help give me the peace of mind I need... it's really a vicious cycle.
I understand their concerns, but I wish they'd at least agree to give me the medication, and then weigh me in a couple of months to monitor any weight loss, and /then/ take it away. That'd give me hella incentive not to lose more. Ugh.
[Rant/Rave] Binge-rant
/u/letttucepray
Created: Thu Sep 8 14:40:16 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51thn5/bingerant/
---
Obligatory "can't flair, on mobile"
Had a fight with my roommate last night, followed by my first ever night terror episode. I'm still trying to recover from that. Probably the scariest shit I've ever experienced. Anyway, so I woke up feeling really down so I skipped my first two classes. I caved to the pressure and binged on cereal, ice cream (lots of ice cream), and a taco. I'm so fucking angry. I weighed myself this morning and I was down to 149, the first time I've been under 152 in thee years, it was a huge accomplishment that is now being overshadowed by my fucked up binge episode. I'm really disappointed in myself. I'm so terrified of gaining the weight back. I guess I'll see if I can muster the energy to go on a walk after therapy. I hope you guys are having a much better Thursday Much love to you guys, stay strong.
Would this be possible?
/u/smallsmallersmallest [168cm | CW 50.9kg GW 46kg | 18.09 | -10.1kg | F]
Created: Thu Sep 8 14:09:13 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51tbps/would_this_be_possible/
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For the past few days I've been either water fasting or binging, no in between at all so I've thought maybe instead of trying to continue fasting or restricting and failing, I could spin the situation around and call it intentional. Would it be possible to eat 2 days worth of calories in one day, for example, followed by a fasting day? Or is that just impossible/dangerous/unreasonable/whatever? With this plan I would get the enjoyment of fasting (I really do love fasting) and also I would relieve the pressure and guilt of binges a bit and see them as less of a failure, or that's what I hope.
I'm not sure I would follow the plan as exactly as that, it would probably be more like, fast for as long as I can bear it followed by eating, so I'm not sure how the calories would work out for that. Hmm maybe I should at least try for a solid plan. I really don't know, I feel like a mess at the moment and like I'm failing at having an eating disorder, even though I know that my eating pattens aren't healthy and neither are my thoughts.
I don't even know if I would like to do it like this, ideally I would like to only restrict and fast, no binging, but I know myself better than that. Maybe I could look into a weekly Sunday binge? Agh I really don't know, I'm sorry this post turned into such a mess.
[Tip] 15 calorie sipping broth
/u/flying_rubber_duck [5'0" | 156.6 | 32.21 | -23.4 | F]
Created: Thu Sep 8 12:48:27 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51swaf/15_calorie_sipping_broth/
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I'm relatively new here so I apologize if someone has posted this already, but I found these 15 calorie "sipping broth" tea bag things, and omfg are they a. delicious and b. the perfect way to shut up my mid-day craving for a snack. And they are vegan!
http://keeplifetasty.com/Millies-Sipping-Broth_ep_47-1.html
Has anyone else tried these? What did you think?
[Discussion] ADHD and ED disclosure? W
/u/behindthearmory
Created: Thu Sep 8 12:41:36 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51suz6/adhd_and_ed_disclosure_w/
---
So I'm all for disclosing your ED to mental health professionals and drs so they can monitor for cardiovascular, kidney and other issues but I've been conflicted lately.
Prescribed adderall in college (legitimate ADHD), was running out of insurance so stacked up 2 years worth by asking my dr to increase my dosage to twice daily for a few months. Just now running out.
(Have moved) Want to see a dr. to get a new prescription but I'm worried they could refuse because of a history of eating disorders? Has anyone had this problem? My last psychiatrist knew me for 5 years so he was pretty trusting, but I feel like given my history a new dr wouldn't give me a prescription.
My therapist is also reluctant to write a recommendation because she thinks I have heart issues based on things I've described to her.
Advice? I don't feel like I can complete normal day to day tasks without adderall and I am already behind on normal level functioning stuff with it.
It doesn't feel wrong
/u/thirdocean
Created: Thu Sep 8 12:38:14 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51suas/it_doesnt_feel_wrong/
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I'm exercising 30min to an hour a day. Eat 1,000 or less calories. I've started a blog to tell myself what I ate all day. I'm trying to stick to not binging. It feels like it's fucked up because I'm 200lbs. Stopped purging for a year and gained like hell. But I want to eat less. I wish I could manage working out on 300 cals. I hate myself. But purging and starving feel so good. I hate eating. I had a sip of Mountain Dew a few days ago and wanted to throw up from how sweet it was. I ate a burger and had a panic attack. It's like I shouldn't feel like this but I don't want to get better. I want to get skinny
[Rant/Rave] Fucking binge
/u/H2OandCaffeine [5ft7 | FAT | -20 lbs | F]
Created: Thu Sep 8 12:18:23 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51sqew/fucking_binge/
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I've been doing so well with restricting to like 400 cal a day or less lately and I just ordered my top b/p food because I'll be alone for the next few days. I fucking hate myself for this. I'm going to stuff myself until I feel full then empty myself by purging and laxatives. Its so awful. I hate it so much. And my friend that keeps me accountable is going to be so disappointed. I wish I could still get away with Self harming because I just hate this so fucking much. Sometimes I just want to die. And I get so close when I'm drunk. I'll never be thin and beautiful if I have these horrible binge days.
Sorry for bitching. I just need someone to understand.
[Rant/Rave] ED and relationships and loneliness
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Sep 8 12:00:39 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51sn04/ed_and_relationships_and_loneliness/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] "Wannarexic" (literally just a rant, nothing of value here)
/u/smokesanddietcokes [Doesn't actually know what she's talking about.]
Created: Thu Sep 8 11:50:49 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51skzn/wannarexic_literally_just_a_rant_nothing_of_value/
---
I know I had disordered eating. Fasting for days on end, restricting.. it's how I lost all that weight last year. I look at my habits and my willpower last year and feel so fucking proud of that woman, how she shed all that fat. How she hardly ate. The stars that would pop infront of her eyes after not eating for 4 days and she'd just giggle, responding to any hunger pangs with a confident 'No, I don't eat anymore'.
My eating was fucked up before then too, but I never lost noticeable weight before then. But last year.. things really got into full swing then, and all the fat melted away.
But now? Well, I fast and restrict.. or fucking try. I am actually successful a lot of the time, but the overeating creeps up on me and means my calories over the course of a week even out to a pretty normal intake for my height, weight, activity level and gender. If not more, if I've really over fucking done it.
I'm not creating any deficit.
I'm not losing weight.
I'm a 'healthy BMI'.
Why am I fucking here then? On this sub? Why?
What if last year really was just a crash diet? I was a surprisingly successful 'wannarexic', who kept it up for over a year, but can't keep it up now?
Shit.
I feel like a fraud just being here, with all of you. A total liar. How can I even begin to say I am still experiencing everything you guys are experiencing now?
I feel a layer of fat over my hip bones, my shoulder blades, my arms.. they were getting so good a few months back, too. I could almost only pinch skin. Stomach was always a fat piece of shit though.
Then again, shouldn't it make me happy? If I truly don't really have any sort of eating disorder, shouldn't I be pleased? Say I crash dieted my way from morbidly obese to a healthy BMI, and taking up running, and taking up weight lifting.. I mean shit, after a year of fucked up habits, wouldn't it be a good thing if I *couldn't* keep this up and instead maintained this now - not get lighter, not get sicker, keeping up my pretty healthy looking and well rounded weekly workout routine? For a fucked up year, wouldn't that be a pretty good outcome at least? Who would WANT an actual eating disorder? Who WANTS an illness that could kill them?
Yeah. Me. I kinda do. "wannarexic". Or, at least, I want to be 88lbs. I want to lose weight. More than almost fucking anything - only one thing I want more. I want to fast and restrict and be as good at it as I was last year. I want to not slip into overeating, ruining my deficit..
The one thing I want more than to lose weight - my boyfriend. I would never break up with my boyfriend in favour of my ED. I wouldn't. He is more important. But sometimes.. sometimes I think, could I get an extra fasting day, if he didn't visit every Saturday? Would Sundays stop being a binge-type day, if he didn't spend it with me? I have to eat around him you see, and that revs my appetite. And I let my guard down, when he's around, and he's around every Saturday and Sunday. I miss him if I cancel. When he's around, I let myself satisfy my hunger, which rages and rages sometimes.
If he weren't around, would I be 88lbs by now?
He is way more important, and (besides for myself) he's the person I want to look pretty and cute and light for anyway, but I can't help wonder..
He's coming over this weekend. I know how I eat around him. He makes me feel too *comfortable*. I've eaten too much so far this week - restricted successfully each day, yes, but not enough for how I know I will eat around him. I was ravenous and cravey after my holiday, and I didn't mange ANY fast days due to that. I'm in a deficit right now, but by Sunday night it will be ruined. I know me. I feel it already. I'm looking to average out at 1600 cals per day this week.
I wish I was as light as you.
Maybe next week will be better.
I'm going to try to make it better.
[Other] Some of my little black book. Added a page inspired by the recent posts.
/u/Polyrrhic
Created: Thu Sep 8 11:06:44 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51scrf/some_of_my_little_black_book_added_a_page/
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http://imgur.com/a/qsuM8
[Discussion] I haven't eaten for 30 days
/u/Skinnybabyshh [5'7 | 110 | -60 | F]
Created: Thu Sep 8 10:23:30 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51s4nt/i_havent_eaten_for_30_days/
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And I know I'm probably gonna have to start eatibg EVENTUALLY. But oh my god it gives me sooo much anxiety. In the first week I lost 9kg and in total I have lost 18kg. Because I continued to run 4km a day. I need to stop ya know. It's enough now. But Oh my lawd I just want to cry when I think about eating.. I don't want to gain the weight back. I worked so hard and here comes food the fucking devil.
Feeling Guilty Over Judging Someone Else's Behavior
/u/essiefitzmonster [5'3" | CW109 | GW100 | F]
Created: Thu Sep 8 10:11:13 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51s2gt/feeling_guilty_over_judging_someone_elses_behavior/
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So my friend is getting married next week. Her wedding dress won't clasp which happens but she had her final fitting in July and has since gained twenty (!!!) lbs since then.
The thing is, like, if you're about to wear a skin tight wedding dress wouldn't you try to lose weight, if not at least maintain??
I asked her what she's going to do and she gave me some fatlogic and said she's doing Southbeach and I'm like.... That is NOT going to help you lose weight fast enough. I suggested she eat very little calories and she looked at me like like I was a monster and rolled her eyes.
The other thing is, this is a destination wedding and she said as soon as the plane lands she's eating and drinking whatever she wants. At this point I'm judging the shit out of her because, HELLO she has 3 days from that point until she puts on her dress!!! Like Jesus Christ could you refrain from shoving shit in your mouth so I don't have to listen to you bitch endlessly about your dress not fitting?!?!?
She has gained a ton of weight in the last year and I'm irritated with her either bitching about it or saying fuck it it's the happiest time of her life so it doesn't matter. Like, no. It obviously bothers you, which is why you are so self destructive!!
So with this anger and judgement comes guilt. I also have barely eaten since I heard she couldn't fit into her dress a week ago so there is that.
It's like my brain fears her behavior and is in overdrive, you know?
You guys are the bomb. thanks for listening.
[Discussion] Binging when your roommate is gone?
/u/Andersoncooperspenis
Created: Thu Sep 8 10:06:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51s1ld/binging_when_your_roommate_is_gone/
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Does anyone else have an issue with binging when their roommate leaves, and you finally have "alone" time?
My roommate has been gone for 12 hours and all I've seen that as is an opportunity to eat, even though I shouldn't and I can't stop.
I used to have a solid cycle of fasting for days and then binging, but in the past 5 years that has stopped and I've gained massive weight. I'm up to 200 (my highest weight ever) and I am at rock bottom. I haven't started binging again until recently, and I think a lot of the weight gain previously was from stress eating, going out with friends and drinking, and depression/hormones/BC. I just feel really stuck and upset. Any advice?
[Rant/Rave] I'm being stupid
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Sep 8 10:04:59 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51s1d0/im_being_stupid/
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[deleted]
[Discussion] Daily Food Diary! September 08, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Thu Sep 8 10:02:24 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51s0vl/daily_food_diary_september_08_2016/
---
This is a daily food diary thread for September 08, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
[Discussion] 15 Day liquid fast. Anything I need to know before I start?
/u/mckenziemudkip [5'2 | CW:109(-21) GW:88 | BMI 20.45| F/20]
Created: Thu Sep 8 09:15:51 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51rsnt/15_day_liquid_fast_anything_i_need_to_know_before/
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I know tips aren't allowed. So I'm just looking for a few kind "heads up" from people who have done a long fast line this.
I never have, but I'm going to be a maid of honor in a wedding on the 23rd of this month, and I'm horrified. I'm about 112lbs right now, and I feel like I will have a break down if I'm not at least 105lbs by then. I hate the idea of all those fucking pictures of me looking fat as fuck. It has me feeling hella desperate.
So, please let me know about your experiences, please c:
[Intro] I'm back.
/u/smallprincess [5' | 159# | bmi32.7 | -53# | F]
Created: Thu Sep 8 09:06:13 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51rqxz/im_back/
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I re-downloaded mfp. I've set my calories to 1000 (i know that's high for some of you, but that's what I think I can do without boyfriend getting suspect). I don't even know what I weigh rn...assuredly, some gross amount. I got a boyfriend and all sense went to the wayside.
How do 'normal' people even eat? I don't get how people eat without thinking about every calorie and not gain weight constantly. Do some people actually feel full and stop eating at reasonable amount of food? That must be awesome.
Anyway, hi! I will update my flair to be accurate when I weigh myself tomorrow morning. I'm sure it will be abysmal. But I can't keep living in ignorance, just hoping I'm not getting fat. I am getting fat. I need to stop the upward climb.
[Discussion] Skin issues?
/u/Polyrrhic
Created: Thu Sep 8 08:42:23 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51rmuy/skin_issues/
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Has anyone else gotten any skin issues? Particularly from purging?
Rash around the nose or little red dots all over the face from straining while vomiting?
[Goal] I fell off the track, and now I'm back.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Sep 8 08:26:50 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51rk5w/i_fell_off_the_track_and_now_im_back/
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[deleted]
[Discussion] does this happen to anyone else?
/u/tallgirlthrowaway13 [72.5" | 178 | 22.8 | 12 | F]
Created: Thu Sep 8 07:51:50 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51re4p/does_this_happen_to_anyone_else/
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my fingertips/fingernails turn bluish-purple when i'm cold. i've noticed it happens more when i'm restricting/fasting. does this happen to anyone else or am i just an anomaly?
[Meme/Humor] best part of having ADHD
/u/tallgirlthrowaway13 [72.5" | 178 | 22.8 | 12 | F]
Created: Thu Sep 8 07:39:30 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51rc5n/best_part_of_having_adhd/
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10mg of ritalin gets me through half a day of fasting, and keeps me productive at work.
[Tip] Tips for running on empty?
/u/behindthearmory
Created: Thu Sep 8 07:19:01 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51r90k/tips_for_running_on_empty/
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Posted a couple days ago about being unable to break a fast. Despite your good advice, no luck. Food makes me gag, at most I can have a 70 cal fruit pouch. Running a marathon this weekend.
Tips for getting through it fasted and probably dehydrated?
Thanks and wish me luck ❤️
[Discussion] Weekly Emotional Support September 08, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Thu Sep 8 06:02:47 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51qxy9/weekly_emotional_support_september_08_2016/
---
We're almost all dealing with quite stressful things outside of our eating disorders. Whether it be complicated relationships, friends, university, work or other mental illnesses like depression, anxiety or OCD, we all seem to be having a rougher time emotionally and mentally than the general population.
Use this thread to post about your problems or ask for advice concerning things other than EDs/ED behaviors.
**As always, follow the sub rules when reading or posting.**
*****
Weekly emotional well-being and support threads are posted every Thursday.
Have any questions or concerns? Comment below, or [PM the mods.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FproED)
[Rant/Rave] Eating my breakfast (greek yogurt with protein powder)
/u/heartbrokenandok [5'7"-ish | 198.4 | 31-ish | -23.4 | F]
Created: Thu Sep 8 05:42:36 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51qvl0/eating_my_breakfast_greek_yogurt_with_protein/
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And it is all I can do to just choke down small spoonfuls. I have about 15 minutes to finish it before mt first meeting, and I really don't want to eat it at all... But if I don't I lose 20g of protein and 120 cal out of my day, and I waste the money I spent on the yogurt and the protein powder... This sucks.
[Discussion] LSD?
/u/H2OandCaffeine [5ft7 | FAT | -20 lbs | F]
Created: Thu Sep 8 05:38:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51qv65/lsd/
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I was wondering if any of you all had tried LSD while having these issues that we all have here? I know I've heard of you're not in the right mindset LSD can really fuck with you and you can have a bad trip. Have any of y'all tried it? If so, what happened?
Thanks!
[Discussion] I feel happy when I purge
/u/venetianrosequartz [5'6"|CW 140|HW 153|LW 130|GW 135|UGW 112|WL -13| BMI 22.6|Female]
Created: Thu Sep 8 05:31:21 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51qu7r/i_feel_happy_when_i_purge/
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Is it normal to feel really happy? Usually when I'm binging I'm beside myself crying, but as soon as I purge I become happy. This leads to unfortunately a lot of purging. I don't feel ashamed, or repulsed. I just feel good. What are your thoughts on this? How do you feel during/after a purge?
Can't flair as discussion, mobile
[Discussion] Discussion: Joylent / Soylent
/u/PrincessLip
Created: Thu Sep 8 02:07:34 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51q8wy/discussion_joylent_soylent/
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Has anyone tried this stuff? Any experiences of using it as your exclusive food source for a day/week/month? How much were you drinking per day?
[Rant/Rave] Living with the inlaws - update (rant)
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Sep 8 00:56:52 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51q20p/living_with_the_inlaws_update_rant/
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[deleted]
[Help] [help requested] to regain control over [binge eating] disorder
/u/apersoni
Created: Thu Sep 8 00:35:59 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51pzrj/help_requested_to_regain_control_over_binge/
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I have been struggling with a binge eating and purging disorder for almost 7 years. I am 30 years old now and it was almost completely absent, though the disordered thinking regarding weight and food never completely leave, until recently. I have started to binge and purge again for the first time in almost a year and I am beside myself with guilt, shame, and repulsion.
I believe this last set back could be due to my cycles. Do any other women here experience instability during/before their menstrual cycle? Perhaps I am not alone and this relapse is due to my body craving iron or something?
It always starts with me being unsatisfied with life and then eating to fill some sort of void, whatever that void may be. I am being treated for type two bipolar and that helps a lot because the sad spells don't come as often but this last one has me in its throws and, to my complete surprise, the eating disorder has come back full fledged.
What do you do when this happens?
Faking it.
/u/Axele61
Created: Thu Sep 8 00:25:06 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51pylm/faking_it/
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On Friday, my therapist had a brutal "come to Jesus" conversation with me. I felt so uncomfortable as she told me that she notices that I do my best to skate by right on my low weight, don't want to attend groups, can't commit to my meal plan longer than a day or two, etc.
She's not wrong, however, why the hell am I in therapy and dietitian, MD, etc, which is basically outpatient, when she's right? I don't want to gain weight, I don't plan to. I just want to be where I am, and if I don't want to eat, I won't.
Should I terminate treatment with them? Because it's like, yeah, I don't want to be emaciated and unattractive, I kind of want to work through my trauma stuff, and I like having them around. I feel that their goal is for me to RECOVER, GAIN WEIGHT, LIVE! Haha. I just want to keep some parts of my anorexia, just to make sure I don't slip. But they can make sure I don't take it too far. If only, my recovery definition lined up with theirs.
[Discussion] I am uncomfortable
/u/verakitty [5'4"|CW 108lbs |18.5 |-12lbs |GW 105 |UGW 99 |F]
Created: Wed Sep 7 23:48:37 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51puli/i_am_uncomfortable/
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Rubbing a foot on my own calf feels like ice. I rub again, just to make sure. I press cold fingers deep into my cheeks, forcing the skin to stretch where hollows could be, if only they could. My limbs fall asleep at odd times. I fall asleep at odd times.
My focus wavers, and my stomach grumbles and protests. It feels weird to breathe. A grainy, real-life filter flushes my eyes when I stand. But I like this fog. I’m drained, and yet unbending. I feel superior. Not to anyone else, but the ugly old me. Every day I stare in the mirror and look for the signs.
DAE feel certain signs of discomfort in their bodies satisfying?
[Tip] Found this super amazing website with photos of different weights and heights!
/u/bumblers [5'8"| 125.3 | -20 | F]
Created: Wed Sep 7 23:08:21 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51ppvy/found_this_super_amazing_website_with_photos_of/
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So I was browsing around online, checking out different websites relating to ideal weight to height ratio, and stumbled upon this!
http://www.mybodygallery.com/index.html#.V9DxZZMrJE5
You can enter in what height, weight, pants size, body shape, and age you want to see! The combinations are endless!
I've been obsessively looking at the 5'9'' and 100lb submissions as my goal, it's so addictive.
It's really interesting, and good for a thinspo/reverse thinspo source.
Just thought you guys might be curious/want to see.
[Thinspo] The best inspo I've ever had
/u/EDWebDev [5'6" | 156.6lbs | fat | 79 | F]
Created: Wed Sep 7 22:43:43 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51pmt9/the_best_inspo_ive_ever_had/
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My fiance told me today that my weight loss progres has been so impressive that it's inspired him to eat less and really pay attention to what he eats. He's worse with bingeing than me, and when he said that, I realized that I hadn't seen him binge in probably about 10 days.
I inspired him, and that inspires me to keep on keepin' on. I've never felt so strong!
[Thinspo] Instagram is a Thinspo gold mine~ Summer/Fall🍂
/u/rukittenmerightnow
Created: Wed Sep 7 22:36:17 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51plsv/instagram_is_a_thinspo_gold_mine_summerfall/
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https://imgur.com/a/nUmBH
[Discussion] What is the latest you take your EC stack?
/u/concuidado [4'11 | 84 lbs | 18.02 | -61| F]
Created: Wed Sep 7 22:02:00 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51phak/what_is_the_latest_you_take_your_ec_stack/
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I've started doing EC stacks and I don't really have an schedule for them. I took one at 7pm the other day and didn't sleep at all that night. I was just wondering when you guys take your last EC stack/ your EC stack schedule. I've just been making sure to keep them 4 hours apart.
[Intro] now that i don't live at home
/u/gin-and-lemon [🐝 5'1"| cw: 155lbs | bmi: 30 | -7lbs | f ]
Created: Wed Sep 7 21:20:55 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51pb37/now_that_i_dont_live_at_home/
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restricting and fasting are going to be so much easier.
i'm so excited, and i hope that i can get down at least 18-20 pounds by halloween *(i used a calculator from here to figure out my cals per day to achieve this, and it seems incredibly reasonable which is nice)*. i want to look kinda hot in some tight outfit, rather than like a sausage that barely fits in its casing. i want to take advantage of my 20s, and get to being my best me.
i want to be skinny enough that i don't feel afraid or awkward going to the gym. i want to be able to restrict so well that i no longer feel the need to purge. i'm half happy (and obvs v sad) that im 1400km away from my boyfriend, because he is the one who's most likely to notice *(and he knows i've dealt with disordered eating in the past, but has no clue its coming on stronger than ever)*. i can buy a scale to weigh all my food because my mom is not here to tell me im being ridiculous *(and i should get one for myself, but slightly less priority)*. and not living at home will be so helpful to all of this. :^)
and i'm happy to have a place to share this.
^sorry ^this ^is ^sloppy ^and ^poorly ^written. ^im ^buzzed ^and ^because ^my ^stomach ^is ^empty ^other ^than ^the ^booze, ^i'm ^feelin ^it ^harder ^than ^normal.
<3
[Discussion] I don't understand why I'm so obsessed with fitting into the smallest size of.. anything really.
/u/fishysandwich [5'3.5 | 120 | -25 | F]
Created: Wed Sep 7 20:45:33 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51p5qp/i_dont_understand_why_im_so_obsessed_with_fitting/
---
Yesterday I was really frustrated when we had scrub fittings at school (I'm taking a CNA course). The lady right off the bat gave me an XS shirt and pants which I was ESTATIC about. I come out expecting her to say it's alright, but to my dismay she says I might need more room around the hips and hands me a S shirt (the XS pants were ok according to her). I feel like a potato sack with that on, but yet she says I would need a "smedium" and that I still don't have enough room at the hips.
Meanwhile, there's that girl with the tiny waist laughing because her XS scrubs are laughably huge on her. Sigh.
I always end up buying clothes in like a size S or whatever that do fit me but would be more flattering were it a size M. I just can't deal with having clothes that size. I'm just so illogical. It's just a stupid letter and yet it seems to affect me so much when it doesn't have an S in it.
[Rant/Rave] Doing a photoshoot! [rant/rave]
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Sep 7 20:31:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51p3ms/doing_a_photoshoot_rantrave/
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[deleted]
[Meme/Humor] Didn't expect to see this ad in this subreddit...
/u/lordjoji [5'3" | CW: 103 lbs | 18.75 | GW: 100 lbs | F]
Created: Wed Sep 7 19:12:20 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51oquf/didnt_expect_to_see_this_ad_in_this_subreddit/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/bef91debfbc74811a3248bbc57db5c11?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=582598743b25f2cdb762a43b0f69c663
[Rant/Rave] so I have absolutely no say in the matter of gaining weight now (really long, sorry)
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Sep 7 19:00:48 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51ooya/so_i_have_absolutely_no_say_in_the_matter_of/
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[deleted]
[Help] Clothing size-weight chart
/u/GoalsandGossip [5'10" | CW 181.4 | BMI 26 | GW 175 | UGW 125 | F |]
Created: Wed Sep 7 18:45:14 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51omi3/clothing_sizeweight_chart/
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I swear I saw a chart here that showed what weights and heights correspond with clothing sizes (i also think it had male and female sizes) but I can't find it by searching. Anyone know what I'm saying about?
[Rant/Rave] I swear I love my friend but (rant)
/u/kittenvillain [5'6" | 124.8 | 20.22 | -25.8 | F]
Created: Wed Sep 7 17:31:52 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51oacv/i_swear_i_love_my_friend_but_rant/
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(ObIigatory 'on mobile, can't flair')
I was talking to her yesterday and venting about having gained a couple pounds since moving in with my boyfriend (so many foods constantly around me now that I would never buy when I lived by myself because they are not my safe foods and it's kind of a sketchy neighborhood - as in there have been multiple shootings in the past month - so I don't feel comfortable running alone here so fuck me right?). She's always been the skinny one out of the two of us. There's no way she doesn't know it. And today she snaps me a pic of her in a bikini with an arrow pointing to her 'fat, bloated' stomach of her 'big lunch'.
Stop it.
Girl is a literal model and has never been above a 19 BMI in her life.
I hate feeling so competitive with someone I do genuinely love but I mean at least it's motivation to stay out of these goddamn snacks. Gonna be primatene and coffee life for the next couple weeks I think. One of my biggest, pettiest goals is to be so skinny I make her look enormous and this was a good push to get back on track for that.
[Thinspo] Bought these jeans off the Wish app. So much thinspo!
/u/Queen-of-me
Created: Wed Sep 7 17:26:13 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51o9fz/bought_these_jeans_off_the_wish_app_so_much/
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http://imgur.com/wVuKVNH
[Rant/Rave] Binge crazy
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Sep 7 16:59:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51o53k/binge_crazy/
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[deleted]
[Discussion] Do chest bones remind anyone else of butterflies?
/u/smallsmallersmallest [168cm | CW 50.9kg GW 46kg | 18.09 | -10.1kg | F]
Created: Wed Sep 7 16:56:11 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51o4h7/do_chest_bones_remind_anyone_else_of_butterflies/
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I love them
[Help] Protein Power?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Sep 7 16:51:17 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51o3p3/protein_power/
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[deleted]
[Intro] intro and rant because of my boyfriend
/u/get-it_together [5'3 |160??| UGW 125 | F]
Created: Wed Sep 7 16:47:59 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51o349/intro_and_rant_because_of_my_boyfriend/
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I've commented in this sub before on my regular account, but I'm using a throwaway for my introduction because my boyfriend has been creeping on my main, and my tumblr, and my kik. I have nowhere to talk anymore. (This is going to be long, I'm really sorry.)
I've been reading this sub for months now and I just want to preemptively thank ya'll for being so welcoming and being so fucking normal. I can't talk about my food issues with anyone else because they don't get it and try to fix what doesn't need fixing. It's because of ya'll that I've stopped feeling like I'm about to pass out when I'm restricting because now I drink powerade zero, take vitamins, keep glucose tabs handy, etc.
I pretty much live my life in a binge/restrict cycle, and I'm (thankfully) back on restrict mode trying to undo the damage of a month and a half long stress binge. I'm 20, soon to be 21, female, and 5'3 and 154lbs. I feel disgusting all the time and I'm honestly done with being so fat. I've been wearing a lot of dresses for the first few days of school and my thighs keep rubbing together and I'm so fed up with myself for not just restricting every day.
The thing that prompted me to make this throwaway and post is my boyfriend. We're living together this year and he's gained weight since we started dating, which isn't that much of an issue. What I hate is that we're both trying to lose weight, and he'll sabotage my attempts to eat less as revenge for me ordering pizza or something for myself during a binge cycle. He'll claim that I ruined his diet by eating food that I ordered FOR ME, and then he'll try to force me to eat. I bought a jar of nutella and tossed it out after eating a quarter of it on a binge, and he dug it out of the trash and put it back on the shelf so I'd be weak and finish it. I was pissed. I poured shampoo in it and threw it away again.
I also horde food because I'm a disgusting piece of shit, and he'll eat the low calorie stuff I buy for myself and then lie to me about eating it. I'm weird about people just taking my food without asking and he's just binging on my healthy stuff. He's probably struggling with some kind of BED, and I feel bad, but I'm so angry at him for not letting me eat the way I want to.
Sorry this got so long. I don't really expect anyone to comment, I just needed to write this down.
[Discussion] What do you wish you could divert this energy towards?
/u/The_Marshmallow_Test [5'5 | CW-120lbs | GW-SkinnyArms&Cheekbones| F]
Created: Wed Sep 7 15:38:17 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51nqqa/what_do_you_wish_you_could_divert_this_energy/
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I read this quote in Portia de Rossi's Autobiography "Unbearable Lightness." Which, sidebar, is quite a good read, with lots of very insightful, #relatable sections scattered in it.
>"The images of stick-thin prepubescent girls never should have had power over me. I should’ve had my sights set on successful businesswomen and successful female artists, authors, and politicians to emulate. Instead I stupidly and pointlessly just wanted to be considered pretty. I squandered my brain and my talent to squeeze into a size 2 dress while my male counterparts went to work on making money, making policy, making a difference.”
What do you guys think of this quote? It really struck me, almost like a slap in the face. And made me realize what I hate most about having an ED. It's not the hunger, or being uncomfortable in my body- I actually like most aspects of my ED. I just hate realizing all the mental energy i've wasted on it. Before I started trying to fix my body, I was so consumed by my studies. I was so passionate about succeeding in my field. I had so many hobbies I truly loved. Now, its like I still care about all the things I used to but i'm always distracted by this damn gremlin telling me I need to lose. I worry its robbing me of the person I could be someday.
The thing is.. I don't know if I totally agree with her first sentence. I don't really care about being beautiful to society. Frankly, I would be totally fine if I became more unattractive to most people. For me it's this very strong need for internal reconciliation. I looked at my body 4 years ago and realized I didn't like it and I simply can not stop until I am satisfied.
Thoughts? I would love to hear from you guys- especially after looking at the Meyers Briggs thread i'm intrigued at how a lot of our personality types deals with this kind of problem of like maybe not living up to our potential?
[Other] One mealers, How many calories do you try to keep your meal?
/u/HowToBeAsian25 [5'3.5 |113lbs |19.78 |-19 | F]
Created: Wed Sep 7 15:27:36 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51nop0/one_mealers_how_many_calories_do_you_try_to_keep/
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https://www.reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51nop0/one_mealers_how_many_calories_do_you_try_to_keep/
[Other] Experimenting with cabbage
/u/verakitty [5'4"|CW 108lbs |18.5 |-12lbs |GW 105 |UGW 99 |F]
Created: Wed Sep 7 15:17:21 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51nmsy/experimenting_with_cabbage/
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http://imgur.com/a/nSEW6
[Tip] New Target Leggings!
/u/finch_love [5'6" | 165.8 | 26.73 | -54.4 | F]
Created: Wed Sep 7 14:56:21 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51niwz/new_target_leggings/
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Target just came out with their own [seamless leggings with a wide waistband](http://www.target.com/p/women-s-seamless-leggings-with-wide-waistband-black-twill-merona/-/A-50988549). I'd say they're comparable to the [Assets seamless leggings](http://www.target.com/p/assets-by-sara-blakely-a-spanx-brand-women-s-seamless-slimming-2045/-/A-15034059) but made from a thicker, more opaque material. The wide waistband isn't as tight as the Assets but still does a great job of holding "it" all in. They run a tiny bit big so if you're an XS/S I wouldn't bother with these. The best part (to me) is the price. These are $18 and Target just raised the price of the Assets from $28 to $32 (in my store, anyway)! I'm a huge fan of the Assets for the comfort and their tummy-sucking-in ability, but I'm going to invest in a few pairs of these because the price is so great compared to what I've been using thus far.
Target also released [fleece-lined leggings](http://www.target.com/p/women-s-fleece-lined-leggings-black-merona/-/A-50988559?lnk=abtest_searchpdp_5) for women! Not seamless and no wide waistband.
[Help] Non food rewards?
/u/Navelpudding [5' 6" | 185 | -65 | F]
Created: Wed Sep 7 14:37:53 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51nff3/non_food_rewards/
---
I don't want clothes til my UGW unless I need them, I trave a lot because of my BFs job so never know when ill be where, we have very little space so I can't keep objects, and there's nothing I want. I usually reward myself with food but that's super counter productive.
Only reward I could think of is I get to be a bunny for Halloween of I loose 30 lb by then starting last month. That's a great reward but very time spesific (can't use it 2 months from now) and kind of one time.
So Lovlies what do you do for non food rewards?
A decision has been made!
BF promised me books for major goals. (Thanks /u/salamanderqueen & /u/stephanynotstokes)
Expensive low cal foods so I still feal satisfied since that's my go to treat (Thanks /u/Glitter_Cunt)
Better hair care/hygiene products than I have (ie better soap, shampoo, nice loofa, another hair brush) (Inspired by /u/F0RGETT1NGWHATEVER's suggestion of skin care)
Thanks so much guys. I'm going to make myself a neat little chart like I've been seeing as soon as I return home. You guys helped a ton with my reward system. Love you guys!
[Rant/Rave] My brain is so broken lol
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Sep 7 14:02:55 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51n8eq/my_brain_is_so_broken_lol/
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[deleted]
[Discussion] I haven't owned a scale in many years. I bought one the other day and I think it was a big mistake.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Sep 7 14:02:23 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51n8b4/i_havent_owned_a_scale_in_many_years_i_bought_one/
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[deleted]
[Intro] Hello
/u/coldbreezy [4'11" | 81 | 17.37 | F]
Created: Wed Sep 7 13:59:27 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51n7ou/hello/
---
I've been creeping this sub on my other account and decided to make a new one to feel safe posting here.
I've been hospitalized once, both inpatient and outpatient. However, when I discovered the bill my parents had to pay, I decided to try my hardest to get out. My highest weight was 93 in March of this year, and I've been slowly getting below my LW ever since, but slowly and with as many vitamins as I can manage.
I have some days where I freak myself out and try to eat, but the next day I end up feeling so guilty. Right now, the closest thing I have to a GW is 77lbs, but when I think about that I get both terrified and excited. I'm just trying to figure out how to manage, is all.
Sorry for the grim post haha, I just wanted to introduce myself because I want to be active here. I hope you're all as cozy as I am, watching AHS and painting.
[Rant/Rave] Professor Made Us Present Our Lunches to the Class...
/u/marr_issey
Created: Wed Sep 7 13:53:18 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51n6hw/professor_made_us_present_our_lunches_to_the_class/
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Hi, I'm marr_issey. 145.2 lbs 5 foot 6 inches. Anorexic for 3 years. I recovered, now I'm back after hitting my high weight of 148 smacked me in the face. I haven't posted much...but I've been a big lurker.
I had a nutrition based class today, and during our break, my professor made us all present our meals to the class. Calories, fat, sodium, and everything. I brought bell peppers and a luna bar. I didn't plan on eating the luna bar, it's an emergency food item, in case I feel faint. I felt horribly anxious. I felt obligated to eat the luna bar, and my professor pointed out how little I was eating. I want to crawl into a hole in die. It's bad enough that I had to eat in front of people (I usually sit in my car to eat). I still can't even proces my feelings. I'm going to go jogging when I get home to let off some steam and burn off the luna bar...but I am just so scared of my classmates judging me for what I eat.
[Rant/Rave] Can't live in this house anymore [rant]
/u/bloodketosexmagic
Created: Wed Sep 7 13:44:41 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51n4tn/cant_live_in_this_house_anymore_rant/
---
Im the middle child with a younger prettier MUCH skinnier sister who is entirely inactive and eats whatever she wants. I have an older brother who is the golden child and is in great shape, has went on keto for a week and has lost all his extra weight and is not struggling at all and calmly happily and steadily losing weight.
They are both are in loving relationships, have daily routines and great social lives.
I worked my ass off for years at uni and can't get a job to save my life. I have no friends, haven't been in a relationship in 4 years and my ED is now its strongest to date. The lows i get from eating make me want to just die and i have no external validation from anyone or anything that could make me happy. I cannot remember the last time someone gave me a genuine compliment.
The only happiness I've got this last month or so have been from fasting. Ive been undergoing CBT since June but this is an all time low now so i just don't know where to turn.
Thank you all for your undying love and support on this sub to each other. Its all i have. Fuck me the melodrama is strong with me tonight. Ugh
[Discussion] A 500 calorie deficit per day (3500 calories per week) does not guarantee 1 pound loss per week.
/u/gastastic [5'1 | 122 | 26F]
Created: Wed Sep 7 13:40:34 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51n3yb/a_500_calorie_deficit_per_day_3500_calories_per/
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http://www.todaysdietitian.com/newarchives/111114p36.shtml
[Rant/Rave] [rant] On Control
/u/kibi_kibi [5'6" | 146 | 23.6 | GW 127 | F]
Created: Wed Sep 7 13:36:26 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51n36v/rant_on_control/
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I know some EDs tend to develop as a means to get control over parts of our lives. When I was in the throes of my ED in high school (say 2008-2010), I could see the connect with that because I was still under the control of my parents with high expectations set for me. But now I'm out on my own in control of most aspects of my life and yet now I totally fuck things up for myself. This may have more to do with depression, anxiety, and my abysmal self-esteem, but being in "control" has seemed to make my will-power and discipline vanish. I have no excuses not to accomplish my goals, be it with weight loss, work, relationships or other personal goals. Yet I don't. I feel like such a worthless POS :(
Everything good that happens to me, I don't deserve.
Every bad thing, I bring upon myself.
[Rant/Rave] My boyfriend loves my "chunks"
/u/insigniania [5'7 | CW: 116 | 18.1 | F |]
Created: Wed Sep 7 13:25:49 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51n12x/my_boyfriend_loves_my_chunks/
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My boyfriend is constantly grabbing/groping my fat (thighs and butt) and gushing over how much he loves my "chunks". He'll grab my ass in the morning when we wake up and just exclaim "It's so juicy, I love this chunky butt so much". Then he'll do the same to my thighs. This guy is absolutely in love with my fat. And it makes me feel horrible. I have BDD and my thighs are the biggest contributor to this. I have told him to stop (but maybe not in a seriously enough tone), but in his mind I'm so thin that he can't wrap his head around the idea that "complementing" me on my curves and appreciating my body makes me feel so big. When I look at my thighs I want to throw up, but he finds them so sexy. He's so wonderful in so many ways, but he is not very receptive or supportive when it comes to my mental health issues, he just doesn't get it. When I tell him to stop calling me chunky he gets annoyed and tells me to stop being crazy because I have a thigh gap so there is no way I think I'm fat. I'm trying to keep my disordered issues private from him right now. Anyone have any ideas on how to get him to stop without making him suspicious?
[Goal] Just made this little colorful journal to track my fasting. I'm on day 2 right now. As u can see, I got very over excited with the highlighter! But this was really therapeutic for me. Plus it was fun!
/u/stephanynotstokes [5'5| too fat |-76 lbs | F]
Created: Wed Sep 7 13:23:33 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51n0o2/just_made_this_little_colorful_journal_to_track/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/4829e15cae0e4b06baace45045dc6de9?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=e8a1b4ca7f306d5a47cd5e8edb21618d
[Rant/Rave] i dont deserve to be happy!!!!
/u/thelonelykitten_
Created: Wed Sep 7 13:10:27 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51myce/i_dont_deserve_to_be_happy/
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I really don't, I don't deserve my boyfriend or my friends or my awesome job or my apartment. Why can't I just be thankful for everything I have instead of hating myself so much??
[Goal] I made one too 😇
/u/turtle4president [5'2" | 106.2 | 20.12 | F/20]
Created: Wed Sep 7 13:09:13 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51my40/i_made_one_too/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/625f92a2c0cc4622b2221d9e9da8d9f2?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=7bec5ad9fb5caa26eb4e2ba0e50328fc
[Discussion] What time do you usually eat?
/u/36bulletking63
Created: Wed Sep 7 12:33:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51mrsb/what_time_do_you_usually_eat/
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I try to eat around the middle of the day but if my family is home dinner is my one source of food. Also what are the daily cal intakes for you guys?
[Rant/Rave] WHAT THE FUCK
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Sep 7 12:31:53 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51mrft/what_the_fuck/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] Hello failure my old friend
/u/DivingRightIn [72in | don't ask | don't tell | ~57.2lbs | UGW: 120lbs | F]
Created: Wed Sep 7 12:20:41 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51mpeu/hello_failure_my_old_friend/
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This is not my first time posting I was "breaking" and probably won't be my last... I've been eating like a hog (read:binging every single night) for over a week now (I got too cocky about my self control).
I stepped on the scale... up 12 pounds... probably at least 7 pounds of fat (which is entirely possible based on the fact I was eating huge quantities of really calorie dense food... fuck peanut butter)
I no longer have a thigh gap... my stomach is swollen... my jeans are getting tighter...
I'm dead inside :-)
Just a side thing: if anyone has any tips to break the binge cycle I would greatly appreciate some advice. I can't eat normal amounts of food without binging and if I restrict, I night binge now...
[Other] I think I need to leave here but thank you guys for what you've done for me <3
/u/honeytarte [5'5" | CW: 119 | GW: 105 | -25 |]
Created: Wed Sep 7 12:06:21 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51mmob/i_think_i_need_to_leave_here_but_thank_you_guys/
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Ive been actually seeking some treatment after a long hard talk with my boyfriend and I got an EKG today and my hearts like slow and shit and I don't have to be super worried about it right now but I've been toying with trying to recover for a while now (I went to these appointments, but always in the back of my mind was, "oh, I'm not actually going to recover this is just to see") and I think I need to actually try and go through with it. I'm normalweight so they shouldn't try to make me gain and hopefully they'll just help me get to a place where I'm functional? Who knows. I do know this though: If i end up gaining I'm going to relapse. It's not even a choice that I'm making it's just an inevitability. I am only okay with recovery if I stay where I am weight wise. So I guess this is Recovery** with an asterisk but that's better than nothing for me right now.
That got kinda long but anyways thanks for all the support and for being a community that understands what's up. <333 much love to everyone here
[Thinspo] Podcast Thinspo
/u/weightliftingwaif [5'2.5" | 111.8lbs | 20.76| 2lbs]
Created: Wed Sep 7 12:04:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51mm9k/podcast_thinspo/
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There was a thread a week or so ago with unusual thinspo; I think it was studying Roman history? It really inspired me to think outside of the norm for thinspo and I came across full cast drama podcasts. I've been listening to The Black Tapes podcast which is a scary paranormal type story and it's been awesome to lose myself in and distract from hunger pains. I wanted to share this podcast with you lovelies and see if anyone else has fun story recommendations.
[Intro] Intro
/u/The_Marshmallow_Test [5'5 | CW-120lbs | GW-SkinnyArms&Cheekbones| F]
Created: Wed Sep 7 11:42:50 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51mihz/intro/
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Hi guys, first post!
I know its super long, its honestly mostly just cathartic for myself to finally be able to write this stuff and share it even if nobody reads it.
I’m so excited to be a part of this community. It’s taken me years to realize I have a problem and I still feel ~weary~ about labelling myself as having an ED. I feel quite strongly that eating disorders are a mental disorder and I lack many of the anxieties and rules around food that I think are symptomatic. That being said, I’ve been active in other ‘weightloss’ communities before on reddit but as soon as I found this subreddit it just felt like... *ah i’m finally home*.
Growing up I was a human runt- short, tiny, skinny as a rail. I always felt very separate than my peers in terms of my body. I witnessed all my friends go through puberty and I felt very safe by comparison, in my tiny non-sexual body. I think the fact that I spent all of my formative years like this is a powerful driving force for my ED. My self-identity is that of a skinny, light, asexual girl.. who just became encased in fat.
Which is not to say I felt attractive like that.While I didn’t have to deal with the perils of puberty, I also never felt pretty or wanted until I was like at least 17. At 15, I remember watching youtube videos about anorexia and being completely engrossed. I was fascinated my anorexia in this weird anthropological way. I wanted to be less skinny at this point so it didn’t hold any appeal but I would spend hours just reading forums and watching videos.
When I finally did get my period and began to develop I was totally stoked. For a while I think my body was perfect (by my standards). I was still lean, but I grew a little taller and I no longer looked like a child. This also coincided with the happiest times of my life. I was 107lbs at 5’5.
I never thought to worry about my weight, I thought I was ‘naturally skinny’. In college I totally threw myself into academics. I forgot about my body, I was studying something I loved, the late nights, the challenges. For the first time in my life I learned how to really work hard and excel. But I also got kinda fat. And so it all began.
The past four years of my life have played out against the backdrop of battling with my body. Every memory or achievement, is weighted by my weight at the time it occurred.
I never wanted to be unhealthy- I always felt the pull of restricting more and more but resisted because I was scared of 'becoming anorexic'. In fact the first two years I was simply active, eating a balanced diet. Mentally though, I was just as fucked up as I am today @ hr 40 of my fast. I hated how average my body looked even though I was doing everything ‘right’. I felt mediocre, and hulking around my mother. My mother came from Japan to New York to be a classical pianist, she is the most dedicated hard working, talented person I know. She was also incredibly skinny and beautiful at my age and I am doomed to spend my life fighting her shadow.
I was tired of feeling average, finally said fuck it last year and decided to go ‘all in’, get skinny by any means necessary. I got kinda skinny last year @ 118lbs, but then I stupidly went on birth control, got depressed, ended up developing a binge eating problem and ballooned up. As soon as I went off birth control in May I began losing weight pretty steadily through mix of high-cal restricting, fasting and the occasional binge (although they have gotten much rarer now that I am in a better place mentally)
This year is essentially a repeat of last year. I am working the same job, I am retaking the same physics graduate school entrance exam I fucked up last year, and I am still ~120lbs. I begged with myself to try and stop losing weight while I study for this exam because I can’t mess it up twice but here I am fasting in spite of my logical self. I come here to you guys because I have simply accepted the fact that I have been circling anorexia for years.
I’m here not so much for weight loss support, because it’s going to happen anyways, but on how to stay focused and have energy to do all the other things I love (ex- omg electrolytes??? You guys have no idea how much that tip has improved my life).
My goal for the end of October is to be 107 lbs, to have kicked ass on my exam and to be happy <3 <3
[Help] Need help guestimating some calories..
/u/KillingKylie [5'5| Piggy|-25|F|GW: 97]
Created: Wed Sep 7 11:13:02 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51mcsx/need_help_guestimating_some_calories/
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I have no idea what the calorie content of a chicken thigh, with skin, that was cooked on a grill would be.
I am quite perturbed by this, so any help would be appreciated.
[Help] How high tolerance is too high with ECs? [help]
/u/disbeetch [5'3'' | 140 | 24.8 | -28 | F]
Created: Wed Sep 7 10:51:50 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51m8qr/how_high_tolerance_is_too_high_with_ecs_help/
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I've been taking bronkaid/primatene off and on for a bit, but I've found that 1 bronk/2 prims isn't helping me as much. I definitely don't take them every day or even every other day- lately it's been twice a week maybe. I don't want to get to the point where I have to take a ton to not be starving, but is it nuts to move up to 1.5 or 2 bronkaids? How many is too many?
[Rant/Rave] I have no more safe foods.
/u/fayeeee
Created: Wed Sep 7 10:44:20 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51m7c2/i_have_no_more_safe_foods/
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I have no problem with fasting and never had, I can do it for hours on end. Back when I used to restrict, I'd just eat a meal in the morning and that was it. But I've been attempting recovery for a good few months now and recently had a relapse. I can fast no problem just like I used to, except I have no idea how to stop. There is nothing I want to eat, and once I do eat something it makes me so guilty it turns into a binge. I need some suggestions, desperately. I tried to replicate my safe foods from back then, like banana and egg white pancakes or carrots, but they don't work anymore. What are your safe foods? Something that won't make me feel too full, either. Thanks guys!
[Goal] Another bomb reason not to eat
/u/High_as_red [5'4 | F]
Created: Wed Sep 7 10:34:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51m5gk/another_bomb_reason_not_to_eat/
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You might faint *just* the right way and hit your head and die.
[Help] I think I just miscarried.
/u/KatnipAndTuck [5'2 | 156 | - 5 | F]
Created: Wed Sep 7 10:21:55 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51m322/i_think_i_just_miscarried/
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******TMI******
So I had accidentally unprotected sex about 3 or 4 weeks back and then took a plan b because I was scared of becoming pregnant. I went on using my birth control as regular but the pharmacist said that was fine and I probably wouldn't get pregnant. I should have started my period on Monday but sometimes it is a day or two late. No big deal so I thought. I started having huge cramps this morning and started bleeding a lot but somewhat normal for me. I you know put in a tampon and whatever and then went about my day. About 10 mins ago I went to have a bath and took it out and went pee and when I wiped there was this huge clot like almost an inch in diameter and thick.
I've been really shitty to my body lately and been drinking a lot (a fuck tonne). Like my max day for the past week was like 800 cals and yesterday the only things I put in my mouth other than water were a tootsie roll, 2 jars of coffee and 5 beers. Oh and my pills. Like fuck.
I don't really know how to feel because I didn't want it in the first place, but at the same time if I actually was pregnant, then the shit I've been putting my body through has literally killed a life. I killed a potential human, but I didn't even know it.
[Discussion] Daily Food Diary! September 07, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Wed Sep 7 10:02:38 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51lzhs/daily_food_diary_september_07_2016/
---
This is a daily food diary thread for September 07, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
[Other] [other] which fitness classes should I go to today?
/u/ozh_esta [5'3.5" | CW 116 | GW 102 | 20.70 | -34lbs | NB]
Created: Wed Sep 7 09:23:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51lsfh/other_which_fitness_classes_should_i_go_to_today/
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my school's fitness classes start today, and I've got an unexpected block of free time - would you guys recommend doing zumba, then pilates, or pilates, then yoga? pilates + yoga is what I usually take, but I'm off work early so I could feasibly go to the earlier class.
I could probably do all three, but I'm a little worried about rushing into it because I haven't been exercising regularly since last semester and I'm shooting for >300cal today to counter yesterday's 740cal which was.... mostly candy corn.
(will put flair when I get to my computer!)
[Goal] Playing with numbers on Losertown
/u/heartbrokenandok [5'7"-ish | 198.4 | 31-ish | -23.4 | F]
Created: Wed Sep 7 09:19:30 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51lrrd/playing_with_numbers_on_losertown/
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The less calories I put it and the more exercise I assume, the bettet I feel about the rate of weightloss it shows me. Because really, all I care about it how fast I can reach my goal weight and the idea of having to be fat for any longer than neccessary makes me feel like a complete failure....
[Thinspo] Thinspo album for my fast ♡
/u/taeyeons-comrade [perpetual shame]
Created: Wed Sep 7 09:05:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51lp5i/thinspo_album_for_my_fast/
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http://imgur.com/a/ZwdTf
[Discussion] Losertown Question
/u/mckenziemudkip [5'2 | CW:109(-21) GW:88 | BMI 20.45| F/20]
Created: Wed Sep 7 08:33:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51ljby/losertown_question/
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Sooo,I usually just put "sedentary couch potato" because I figure if I'm expecting to lose less, and I just happen to lose more, than awesome!
But I've been wondering what you guys consider "light, moderate, and vigorous" exercise? Everything I read online is kind of confusing.
I do a jog/walk combo for about 20 minutes every morning, and then walk a black back and forth to work about 4 times daily.
I consider this "light" activity.
What about you guys?
[Intro] Officially relapsing
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Sep 7 08:13:14 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51lfup/officially_relapsing/
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[deleted]
[Thinspo] cozy fall thinspo album <3
/u/tinybites [5'6" | sw: 185 | cw: 159.5 | gw: 115]
Created: Wed Sep 7 07:45:56 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51lbk7/cozy_fall_thinspo_album_3/
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http://imgur.com/a/PhVe5
[Rant/Rave] Such a double standard plus some more
/u/Skinniminnie [5'3" | 157.0 lbs | 27.6 BMI | -12 lbs | F]
Created: Wed Sep 7 07:43:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51lb3v/such_a_double_standard_plus_some_more/
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I cant flair, I'm on mobile!
I watched a video on youtube of a girl who was a 700lb feeding model with the goal of becoming 1000lbs. Some comments pointed out her being unhealthy but most just said along the lines of, "Yeah she's unhealthy, but if it makes her happy, let her be, its her body and her life." Yet I'm sitting here like, really? I can't starve myself because its dangerous for my health but she can gorge on foods that are dangerous for her health? Where is the logic at?!
Also, went to a wedding this past weekend, got to see my hubby, and it was amazing. But I got back to my normal life and its just been awful, I gained weight I know it and Im so scared to check the scale... I know its stupid and it couldn't have been more than a pound or two but I ate normally because my husband doesn't know I relapsed and now I just feel like a whale.
This is all very ranty and rushed but I needed to get this out. I'll probably edit the post later to add some stuff in as well.
I just want to say thank you to everyone for being so supportive and lovely!!
[Help] fasting and headaches
/u/tinybites [5'6" | sw: 185 | cw: 159.5 | gw: 115]
Created: Wed Sep 7 07:29:21 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51l8y7/fasting_and_headaches/
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does anyone here have problems with headaches when they don't eat enough? i enjoy fasting but i always end up getting headaches and even migraines after the 15 hr point. i don't want to take medicine without food and get an ulcer. does anyone have and tips or tricks?
[Discussion] Way To Go Wednesday September 07, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Wed Sep 7 06:02:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51kw6h/way_to_go_wednesday_september_07_2016/
---
This is the weekly achievement thread for September 07, 2016.
This weekly thread is to spotlight those achievements you feel don't necessarily warrant their own post, but you'd like to celebrate all the same. This is not limited to specifically ED-related goals; share anything you are happy about having done or accomplished recently!
*****
Achievement threads are posted every Wednesday.
Have any questions or concerns? Comment below, or [PM the mods.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FproED)
[Rant/Rave] God what was I thinking
/u/AmAlreadyGoingToHell [H: 5"8 W: 129 GW: 110 F]
Created: Wed Sep 7 04:44:55 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51kn9c/god_what_was_i_thinking/
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When I signed up for nutrition and dietetics, my (un)healthy food teacher is SUCH thinspo (seriously, I suspect BMI 14)
But, I've lost 4 kgs in the last three weeks, I'm back at BMI 19.2 and I'm ready to be underweight again.
[Thinspo] Wednesday: Cute Thinspo
/u/dbishop22
Created: Wed Sep 7 04:07:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51kjfx/wednesday_cute_thinspo/
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https://imgur.com/a/4n5ao
[Help] I'm thinking of going vegetarian again
/u/woollyshirt [172cm | 54.3kg | 18.19 | -33.7kg | NB/M]
Created: Wed Sep 7 03:41:59 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51kgrk/im_thinking_of_going_vegetarian_again/
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This isn't strictly ED stuff but I feel like it's mostly relevant to this sub because there are a lot of vegetarians here. I was raised vegetarian. I didn't eat meat for the first 17 years of my life. When I moved in with my dad and his gf, I started eating meat under pressure from them (and it took a lot of uneaten meals and chewing without looking at what I was eating to 'get over' it) and I'm now feeling a bit resentful. I do enjoy eating and cooking meat, but I feel less...pure? Being vegetarian was kind of a big part of my life, and I've been toying with going back to it or even trying veganism. I also feel shitty that I've spent a year eating meat though- not necessarily for animal welfare reasons, but just that it's animal flesh and it does skeeve me out a little to acknowledge that. I've been vegetarian before so I know it's practically possible but I feel like I need a little push to get back to that. Any thoughts?
[Discussion] Is your digestive system totally messed up? How long has it taken to happen, what have your habits been like, and whats the issues you experience? (CN: Gross TMI info in OP, regarding toileting!)
/u/smokesanddietcokes [Doesn't actually know what she's talking about.]
Created: Wed Sep 7 02:15:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51k834/is_your_digestive_system_totally_messed_up_how/
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Really curious what others experience.
After over a year of fasting on consecutive days and restricting, my digestive system seems to be total balls.
---
I've always had IBS, but it's gotten so much worse. Even eating just a little, even when I successfully restrict to just a few hundred cals, I bloat up and get really gassy. Binging makes it so much worse though - I go from my usual 26ish inch waist (wah I miss my 24 inch.. creeping up to 27 now) up to around 33-34 of round belly after a binge.
---
My toileting is completely messed up too. It can swing both ways. In general, it goes week by week:
Scenario 1 week: I only pass stools once per week, and that's only after the Sunday binge. Otherwise, I am constantly constipated and nothing comes out no matter what all week, even if I eat to maintenance on a gym day. It all just stays in there until after the Sunday binge..
OR
Scenario 2 week: (**TMI**) I have raging, watery, explosive diarrhoea that will occur straight after eating - I mean, STRAIGHT after or even during, I have to put my meal down and rush to the loo. God forbid I am not near a loo (yes it has happened..) Sometimes it takes up to hour. When I go through this, it lasts up to a week, and then I'll go back to being constipated(scenario 1) for a week or two until it happens again.
---
I pee ALL THE TIME. And it's uncontrollable, I can't hold it very well. Not sure if this counts as digestive system, but I'm including it anyway. And I mean, ALL. THE. TIME. Everytime I stand up, need to pee. Went up or down stairs, need to pee. Just finished peeing? ..Need to pee. I'm at the gym for 45min-1h30min, and during that time I'll need to pee 3-4 times.
Sometimes I'm wiping and realise I need to pee again, or washing my hands and I have to sit back down on the toilet to pee more. Because of this, during bad times, one trip to the loo can take up to *40 minutes* cus I keep stopping and starting with the pee and having to rewash my hands all the time, like jesus. Sometimes it just leaks out - I'm 27 and wearing pee pads made for old ladies, or even those diapers made for teenagers if I am having a really bad time of it and the leaks are more than just a trickle (sexy..).
---
Lactose intolerance. I never used to be, but I am now - pretty severely. I've heard it can come with age too, though, so I'm not sure it's ED related. Since I am pescetarian - I only eat tuna meat-wise, and I've been cutting that out recently - most of my protein comes from dairy. The greek yogurt seems to be okay-ish, but cottage cheese and quark? Oh boy. It's terrible. It's usually after eating cottage cheese on Wednesday (after fasting Monday and Tuesday) that the 'Scenario 2' from above (diarrhoea weeks) are first triggered (but the diarrhoea carries on even if what I ate wasn't dairy). If it's not, then I'm still dead gassy and crampy and uncomfortable after dairy - and whey protein, too. You'd think I'd stop eating cottage cheese and quark in this case, really.. but nope, those are safe foods, so I keep eating them and deal with the cramps.
Recently I read that with this sort of lactose intolerance, it's possible that I may not be digesting the sugars from the dairy foods.. and ED brain saw that as a huge plus point, as I only want the protein anyway, and a good reason to keep my main safe protein foods as dairy. ED brain hopes I am not digesting *any* of the sugars and it's all just fermenting in there until I next go to the bathroom.. or coming out straight away if it's a 'Scenario 2' week. I don't think it's likely as true as I *hope* it is though..
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So, how have you totally fucked your system up compared to before ED/before ED got severe? :P (whatever your ED is)
[Goal] Crazy thing happened *cant flair*
/u/stephanynotstokes [5'5| too fat |-76 lbs | F]
Created: Wed Sep 7 00:46:50 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51jys3/crazy_thing_happened_cant_flair/
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I was lying down with my boyfriend when he put his arm over my stomach and said "what's that?" I said, my stomach? And he goes "No no this hard thing". So we pull the sheets off and I don't see anything and he goes "I felt something hard on your hip" and he reaches over and touched my hip and he goes "oh it's your bone! I've never felt that before"
I have never been able to feel those bones before. I can JUST feel them poking out from under my skin. I'm so excited! I've been rubbing my stomach for like 20 minutes lol.
[Discussion] How much weight do you guys lose every week?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Sep 7 00:24:04 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51jwau/how_much_weight_do_you_guys_lose_every_week/
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Just saw a post where someone said they were losing 10lbs a week, which sounds absolutely insane: 3500 kcal/lb of fat x 10 lbs = 35000kcal deficit per week = 5kcal deficit per day?! How is that even humanly possible?! So now here I am trying to gauge how effective I'm being in my weight loss...how much do you guys lose every week on average?
[Help] Unable to eat even when willing to
/u/behindthearmory
Created: Tue Sep 6 23:32:17 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51jqk7/unable_to_eat_even_when_willing_to/
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Hey lovelies!
So I've been fasting for a week or two now, keeping it to under 300 cals a day and sometimes 150. I've gotten by with xanax to calm my nerves because not eating is a huge anxiety trigger for me, but am getting to the point where I'm finding it hard to go up the stairs to my house, drive, and generally stand without feeling dizzy.
I tried to eat some yogurt tonight (the one that's usually my favorite/preferred yogurt) and couldn't help but gag and almost vomit.
Ideas of easy to eat foods to kind of get me feeling ok for a couple days again? I have work, obligations and a marathon this upcoming weekend so I can't be feeling this way.
Thanks
[Other] Just need to share
/u/onlyActing [5'10"| the weight is too damn high party | -35lbs | F]
Created: Tue Sep 6 23:04:50 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51jn9j/just_need_to_share/
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On mobile; no flair
also, sorry for this being poorly written
Tonight, I cooked for my girlfriend and ended up eating some with her. I feel so bloated and fat. Cheesy mashed potatoes baked into jalapeño halves all topped with cheese. Total calories today with my watermeoln and bagel (terrifying) for breakfast: 900 kcal. I did get a 5 mile walk in but it's only walking. Still this is a low amount of exercise and high amount of food for me today. It is quite upsetting. But I know that I can't keep doing days like I have been. Yesterday I actually counted: 200 kcal in, 1 hour of moderate biking, 1 hour of walking.
Last week I blacked out on my bike and took a spill on the trail. Luckily some bikers saw and helped me wash out my wounds and kept me from just passing out on the levee. They almost called an ambulance and I am terrified I will get locked up in-patient. My girlfriend came to grab me and my bike and she is starting to talk about in-patient. I'm still overweight but some recent events in my life have just really unlocked that ol' coping mechanism and my behavior has been full blown anorexic, even if my body doesn't show it yet. I love her very dearly but I don't want to be afraid that just because I pass out or fall down she is going to have me sent to a place like that. Oh yeah, she also was walking with me, I think I did 12 miles of walking and 6 miles of biking that day but she usually uses the car, when I collapsed by a busy intersection.
I'm so scatter brained. It's hard to focus. I'm afraid. I'm too fat to be sent to have a problem.
[Intro] Well that didn't work... (Relapse)
/u/tozne
Created: Tue Sep 6 22:33:25 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51jj0m/well_that_didnt_work_relapse/
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So I started my self-"recovery" a month ago from a BMI of 15.9. I tried unrestricted eating (aka binging), and now, I'm at a BMI of 23.1 with the same disordered thoughts.
If I'm going to have a problem in my head, might as well look the part so I hate myself a bit less.
Edit: used the BMI calculator in the sidebae
[Other] when ED meets alcoholism
/u/clamshells [5'7 | 115 | 18.0 | f]
Created: Tue Sep 6 22:18:36 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51jgyq/when_ed_meets_alcoholism/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/658ebffad0ce4c5aaee9e2a04a303515?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=30b13d7ab68ddc86466ca486443ea636
[Meme/Humor] How I feel about my body when it's being noticed (x-post /r/me_irl)
/u/fckk [5'4| CW 120lbs | 20.60 | GW 115 | F]
Created: Tue Sep 6 21:07:47 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51j6de/how_i_feel_about_my_body_when_its_being_noticed/
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http://i.imgur.com/47lXxq8.jpg
[Discussion] Body Dysmorphic Disorder?
/u/Vaxn [Don't | worry | about | it | F]
Created: Tue Sep 6 20:59:11 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51j51v/body_dysmorphic_disorder/
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Today I was diagnosed with Body Dysmorphic Disorder (BDD) was anyone else diagnosed with this? I was diagnosed with OSFED last year, and I knew I had body dysmorphia, but I wasn't aware it was it's own disorder I thought it was a symptom.
Do most people with EDs have BDD?
[Rant/Rave] I keep overeating and it's making me so mad.
/u/darliingclementine [5'8 | 22.5 | F]
Created: Tue Sep 6 18:45:24 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51ij6d/i_keep_overeating_and_its_making_me_so_mad/
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I'm so annoyed with myself. I keep overeating and/or almost bingeing. In the past week I've eaten so much shit that I wouldn't normally have. I'm trying to make good decisions food-wise and eat mostly fruits and veggies like I usually do, but my birthday was this past weekend and I just took on a second job and I'm going crazy!
I just feel so bad when I eat too much. Today was better than yesterday, I know that, and tomorrow will be better than today, and I'm back on my prozac so that'll help curb my binge urges and it'll all be okay.
But I'm still annoyed. Just needed to vent to someone I guess, not really looking for advice. I know what I need to do and it'll be a challenge but weight can always be lost and overeating a bit doesn't mean that I have to keep overeating or that the day is ruined.
[Discussion] This might just be my personality, but running into people I went to high school with (10+ years after the fact) makes me SO uncomfortable.
/u/Noroeste [5'6 | can fit in a rowboat | F]
Created: Tue Sep 6 17:32:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51i73u/this_might_just_be_my_personality_but_running/
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I don't want you to recognize me or say hi. I feel worse now, thinking about all the things I think *you're* thinking about after that encounter, than I would have felt if you'd just pretended to not know who I am.
Any disruption to the illusion (self-delusion?) that I'm invisible really just makes me feel like crying. And then I feel crazy, because what kind if sane person would feel sad about someone being friendly?
[Intro] Good morning sunshine! Intro
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Sep 6 17:10:25 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51i3f5/good_morning_sunshine_intro/
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[deleted]
[Discussion] Has anyone actually read Bridget Jones Diary?
/u/heartbrokenandok [5'7"-ish | 198.4 | 31-ish | -23.4 | F]
Created: Tue Sep 6 17:04:20 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51i2c9/has_anyone_actually_read_bridget_jones_diary/
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I'm listening to the audio book and I feel so much more in common with her than is healthy. She says her good diet days are ones when she eats like 600 cal, but her had days she claims to eat 3000+.
I think the line that hit me the most in the book is when she says:
"I realized that I have spent so many years being on a diet that the idea that you might actually need calories to survive has been completely wiped out of my
conscious- ness. Have reached point where believe nutritional ideal is to eat nothing at all and that the only reason people eat is because they are so greedy they cannot stop themselves from breaking out and ruining their diets."
She can name the exact calorie count of most food items simply off the top of her head. She constantly feels inadequate about her body. She feels like me. And I'm not sure that I'm ok with that...
[Intro] Intro
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Sep 6 16:59:15 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51i1iq/intro/
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[deleted]
[Thinspo] I just lost my appetite
/u/greenso [5'11" | CW: 145 | GW: 115 | F]
Created: Tue Sep 6 15:48:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51hot8/i_just_lost_my_appetite/
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http://i.imgur.com/2ShfM29.jpg
[Rant/Rave] The most embarrassing thing happened today
/u/ilovepugs_ [5'6 1/2" | 149.2 | 23.7 | -4.8 | F]
Created: Tue Sep 6 14:43:10 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51hcjw/the_most_embarrassing_thing_happened_today/
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Okay, so I can't flair cause I'm on mobile. Please don't hate me.
So today was pretty painful. I decided to take a body toning class at my college so I can easily get some exercise in and burn fat. So last class my professor said that she would be weighing us, doing a body fat assessment, and taking our measurements. I thought this would be fine because I figured it would only be me and the body toning professor.
Nope, we had to grab a partner and take each other's measurements. So I met this sweet girl and she wanted to be my partner, and I was like sure!! She's so down to earth and sweet. But she's my height and much thinner. When I glanced at her paper, it said 113 lbs. She's basically my at my ultimate goal weight. We had to take each other's measurement's. She was absolutely perfect in every way. 21% body fat, 24 in waist, just fucking perfect.
Then there's me. 28 in waist. 152.6 lbs. 25% body fat. She had to measure all my measurements.
I'm so horribly fat. I had to try my hardest to not care and pretend I was happy when all I wanted to do was just cry. I've been trying to eat normally and try to accept myself the way I am, but fuck that. I'm in a lab by myself right now honestly just quietly crying. I really hate myself. I really hate today. I just want to go home and cry, but I have diff eq in like an hour. Absolutely painful day. Rude awakening. I was currently trying to eat at my TDEE, but I have to cut it down. I have to cut it down to 800 calories. Because this experience will stick with me for the rest of my being.
[Rant/Rave] Commuting to University
/u/Jackysuave [5'4" | 136 | 23.34 | F]
Created: Tue Sep 6 14:26:41 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51h96p/commuting_to_university/
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School finally started and I can get distracted with school work and actual work while making sure food doesn't get the best of me. Last year when I dormed, I thought I could get away without eating but food was at my disposal and the opposite had happened. I ate everything in site, all the time. It's not healthy to have had all the meal swipes I did.
Since my school is pretty far from my home, 45 minutes away without traffic, I don't have a meal plan, my university is big, there are many cafes, and the library is my favorite spot. I have water with me and hummus stored away at my job in case I do get hungry.
Though I'm only away at school three out of the seven days of the week, the rest of my week will be at work, or at my library at home to study when I need cause I know I can't study in my home.
I can now train myself to spend hours without food and be okay.
Great things are bound to happen, right?
[Rant/Rave] Away at University
/u/ForeverEmptyInside [5'9"| CW:119.6 lbs | BMI 17.7 | LW:104lbs | M]
Created: Tue Sep 6 13:30:36 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51gy8t/away_at_university/
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Hey guys,
So a couple of you guys may have remembered my posts from a while back, where I talked about skipping over therapy and moving away from everyone in order to go to university. Many people including my friends/ family at home were very worried about me moving so far because 2-3 months prior I was hospitalized for my eating disorder. (If I am being honest with myself, I probably should have taken a year off in order to really give recovery a shot).. but I told everyone that I would be okay and they didn't have to worry.
And now that I am here at university, things are just so -- surreal. Like, I don't know anyone here? No one gets concerned when I say that I don't want to go have breakfast. In a way its slightly liberating that no one is hovering over my back.. but at the same time, it's really stressful because i have to eat in the residence cafeteria where there are thousands of people eating. And I /cannot/ eat around that many people. I have a very select few that I can eat in front of... and they are all back at home over 8 hours away.
I still really haven't figured out how I am going to eat at all here. I haven't made any solid friends and I feel pretty uncomfortable eating around anyone here. Ontop of all that, classes begin tomorrow and I feel like that will just add to the stress levels.
Sorry if this post sounded very ranty, I just had a lot on my chest and I thought I would update you guys in the process of it all.
I'm pretty lonely so far from home, so feel free to message me anytime.
[Rant/Rave] When Fitspo and Thinspo don't help - gender identity issue
/u/hazelconner [5'4" | 179.6 | 34.0% BF | -10.4 | X/F]
Created: Tue Sep 6 13:00:30 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51gsc9/when_fitspo_and_thinspo_dont_help_gender_identity/
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I'm crying because I feel like I have no inspiration for my body. I see Thinspo and Fitspo and cry because I don't want to look like that. I was assigned female at birth but I'm not a girl and I'm not a boy. I feel like I can't find what I want my body to look like and having no inspiration is crushing me.
The closest human I can find is Ronda Rousey but listen to me blabbering like I could ever look like her. Fml.
[Help] Has fasting ever made you have MORE periods?
/u/Thunder2WonderThighs
Created: Tue Sep 6 11:53:02 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51gf8u/has_fasting_ever_made_you_have_more_periods/
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So I've been loving fasting but since I've started I've had a period every 2 weeks. I'm on the pill so that definitely shouldn't be happening, and they're really heavy so I'm worried about becoming anemic. Maybe because I'm not eating, missing one pill has a greater effect?
I want to keep fasting because it's so magical but I'm tired of bleeediiiiiing.
[Discussion] Excited to start this fast
/u/stephanynotstokes [5'5| too fat |-76 lbs | F]
Created: Tue Sep 6 10:41:24 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51g4r0/excited_to_start_this_fast/
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I started fasting today (after a nice binge of mcdonalds breakfast). I'm not sure how long I'm going to fast, I know at least 3 days. Possibly a week to 10 days depending on how I'm feeling. I haven't done a real fast in over a year. I really hate fasting because I know its terrible but I have no other choice right now. I'm at a serious plateau. Anyone else fasting this week? Hows it going?
[Help] Fluoxetine?
/u/starry_daydreamer [4'11" | 99 lbs | 21.2 | F]
Created: Tue Sep 6 10:32:55 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51g339/fluoxetine/
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So over the past year I've been taking my fluoxetine with food, as per instructions. However, I've finally gone away to university where I can restrict as much as I'd like, and I was wondering if anyone here takes fluoxetine without food? Does it work, or should I just suck it up and take my meds with a small meal?
[Rant/Rave] i have no self control around chocolate :(
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Sep 6 10:28:48 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51g2bj/i_have_no_self_control_around_chocolate/
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[deleted]
[Help] Need to go to my doctor but don't want to discuss/admit my restriction habits
/u/shortleggedbeastie [5'2" | 165.8 | 31.4 | -20 | 20F | GW 100]
Created: Tue Sep 6 10:14:23 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51fzlw/need_to_go_to_my_doctor_but_dont_want_to/
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This is *probably* not ed related but recently i've been experiencing some dermatologic issues that really fucking suck.
I've always had average skin troubles, like a spot or two (or three) now and then, oh and i guess when i was in middle school dryness around my nose. But a while ago (and now) I had (have) a weird dry rashy breakout of itchy bumps on my upper lip. God forbit it's a cold sore, which I've never had before. But I really doubt it because it has different "behaviors" i guess you'd call it.
This happened last month and only lasted about three or four days with constant chapstick application. But then in the following days after it was gone i developed a patch of dry skin on my left eyelid only. It started out really small but now it's about the size of a dime. Looking like a damn alligator scale, on my face. Aaaand then dryness in my ears. Which itches likeafuckingbitch and actually makes it fractionally harder to hear (which i wouldn't have noticed if i didn't listen to asmr videos regularly).
I went to immediate care and was prescribed some steroids to put in my ears (which i haven't used yet bc i couldn't afford the prescription until payday). I'm getting my prescription today and after a little panicking i will probably call my doctor and set up an appointment. Because the bitch ass rash on my mouth is back with a vengeance. Instead of just being on the upper lip in the corner, it's all over my whole mouth (not inside) and it's climbing down the sides which makes it hurt to talk or even smile. :( It's barely noticeable because if it were to have color, i wouldn't be able to tell because it's on my lips, it just feels like aggressively chapped lips when i run my tongue over them, but when i go like 2 inches in front of the mirror it looks like tiny little ugly bumps. And it's the fourth day. (lowkey hope it stays for my doctors appt. i want her to look at it ugh)
My point is that I'm going to ask for a complete bloodwork levels health check-up test *and* get screened to see if i've developed any allergies since childhood (previously had *no* allergies). Which means I'm also going to be asked a bunch of questions about my eating habits. I haven't done anything in my life differently since these problems started (that I am aware of) other than heavy restriction. And I really really want to find out what's wrong with me but I would love to not talk about my ed, that would be a rabbit hole into a whole line of shit I don't want to deal with right now.
Not to mention I haven't had my period for like two months (not on birth control, basically virgin mary) and i know that's gonna freak my doc out....
Lowkey help, but mostly just talk to me, I'm sad I'm an incubus of viral plague
Studying at home
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Sep 6 10:07:24 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51fyb6/studying_at_home/
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[deleted]
[Discussion] Daily Food Diary! September 06, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Tue Sep 6 10:02:19 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51fxag/daily_food_diary_september_06_2016/
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This is a daily food diary thread for September 06, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
[Help] Fasting is getting boring, I don't know what to do...
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Sep 6 09:37:45 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51fsn3/fasting_is_getting_boring_i_dont_know_what_to_do/
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[deleted]
[Other] feeling shitty and browsing reddit when i found this and realized ive been B/Ping now for over 12 years. It seems like such a normal part of life
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Sep 6 09:32:19 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51frkt/feeling_shitty_and_browsing_reddit_when_i_found/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] Well that's embarrassing
/u/Queen-of-me
Created: Tue Sep 6 08:57:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51fl67/well_thats_embarrassing/
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http://imgur.com/yhr67SR
[Intro] Intro
/u/88Wolves [5'6.5" | 100.2 | 15.93 | GW 90 | F]
Created: Tue Sep 6 08:42:42 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51fikv/intro/
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I've lurked for a long time, and commented here and there, so I figured I'd finally type up an intro now that I'm not on mobile.
I'm 27, and have been struggling with AN since I was 11. I've been through several IP/residential stints, as well as cumulative years of outpatient treatment and therapy. I'd been doing better for the past several months, and for the first time in the 16 years I've been dealing with this illness, I actually had a positive mindset about recovery. Like, I *wanted* it, rather than feeling like I needed to do it for other people, or having it forced on me. But that's all gone now, and I'm left wondering why I ever allowed myself to think like that... I've dropped about 10 lbs. in the past two weeks, but I've got a LOT left to go before I hit my UGW. As frustrating as it is realizing how much weight I let myself gain, there's a part of me that sort of likes the fact that it's so easy to make the numbers on the scale drop when I'm at a higher weight. Makes me feel like less of a failure. Ha.
Um, a little about me outside of my ED... I'm a research biologist for the government, do wildlife rehab on the side, and I love music, traveling, playing piano, and watching sports. I've got an amazing boyfriend (18 months together today!), three kids, and a houseful of rescue pets. I've got C-PTSD, GAD, and a huge host of sleep issues (severe chronic insomnia, REM sleep behavior disorder, recurrent night terrors, and I'm a BAD sleepwalker). So, yeah. Hi.
[Rant/Rave] I tried to not care this weekend and ended up binging for the first time in months
/u/supersizetrainwreck [5'9 | CW 125lb | 18.13 | F]
Created: Tue Sep 6 08:30:34 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51fgi4/i_tried_to_not_care_this_weekend_and_ended_up/
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So this weekend was pretty difficult. I had seen a therapist last week which I actually cannot continue with due to financial reasons and she said she wanted me to get a physical to see if I've hurt myself in the past few months and I thought it was a good idea. So I went Saturday morning and although I was nervous he said I was fairly healthy (my heartbeat is slow but not unusual) and that I'd get my blood test results back this week. I was really shaken by the appointment but had it in my mind that this was the start of recovery. So I went to a party that night and although I tried my best to restrict I ended up eating way more dessert than I should have. And it all started because I ate eggplant parm, and then couldn't stop eating it which turned in to couldn't stop eating. Then the next day we got home and I was good until I went to Trader Joe's and came home for dinner. I started cooking and declared that I wasn't counting that night and was just going to eat, which meant I ate way to many garlic fries, cheese, cookies, cookie butter, ice cream, chocolate, just way way too much. Then yesterday it wasn't as bad because it wasn't as much food but I couldn't help but snack. I ended the night with more cookie butter and just feel awful today. I was doing so well for months and just ruined it over the idea of getting better which just made me worse. I haven't even reached my first goal weight yet and now I'm even further from it than I was last week. I had finally gotten below 130 and now I'll be lucky if I'm back at 130 at the end of the week. It's just solidified the fact that I'm not ready to stop yet. The doctor told me I was underweight and when I mentioned to my bf that I didn't think he was there yet he said if he thought I looked underweight or sickly he would have told me, which really means that I could stand to lose more. I just feel so disappointed in myself.
[Thinspo] Neon Demon. Ready for the newest thinspo movie guys?!
/u/HowToBeAsian25 [5'3.5 |113lbs |19.78 |-19 | F]
Created: Tue Sep 6 08:24:45 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51ffjc/neon_demon_ready_for_the_newest_thinspo_movie_guys/
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cipOTUO0CmU
[Other] Just in case you might need this.
/u/kpatable [5'9" | 124.6 | 18.1/18.4 | -22.4 | F]
Created: Tue Sep 6 07:48:15 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51f9yf/just_in_case_you_might_need_this/
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http://i.imgur.com/JESdFoW.jpg
[Rant/Rave] I had a very bad b/p night yesterday and I want to shame myself by sharing...
/u/throwawaytodayokc
Created: Tue Sep 6 07:30:48 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51f784/i_had_a_very_bad_bp_night_yesterday_and_i_want_to/
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https://i.redd.it/y0e6tut5twjx.png
[Discussion] Can't flair on mobile. Do you think we'll always be this way?
/u/thinkthinlythrowaway
Created: Tue Sep 6 07:20:07 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51f5kc/cant_flair_on_mobile_do_you_think_well_always_be/
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It's been bad lately. I hit the 140 and I won't say I didn't freak out and take a pill cause I did. I know logically there is no way I would gain 4 pounds in 3 days but it also doesn't matter cause that's what the scale says...
And I'm a disappointment to my boyfriend. But honestly before we started dating I could fit into my pants from 8th grade (which doesn't mean much cause I was a fat 8th grader but still) and now I can't now I feel like all I'm allowed to wear are clothes that are too tight to remind me why I keep doing this. And I'm really just tired of being so fat and he doesn't see it...
Do you think it'll always be like this for us? That we'll always either be really well and small and something will fuck us up? It's really depressing saying I fail at an eating disorder, that my parents and friends don't see it and when I talked to someone for help with recovery they said I probably didn't have an eating disorder anyways...
Do you think we'll keep restricting and binging and hating ourselves even when we're 80... Or do we hit a point where other things matter more? I can't think of things that would matter more....
Well that's the depressing thought of Tuesday. How is everyone I stalk a lot of you but don't actually talk.
[Help] Supplements?
/u/hazelconner [5'4" | 179.6 | 34.0% BF | -10.4 | X/F]
Created: Tue Sep 6 07:20:00 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51f5jv/supplements/
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[removed]
[Rant/Rave] Trying to explain ED stuff to friends
/u/woollyshirt [172cm | 54.3kg | 18.19 | -33.7kg | NB/M]
Created: Tue Sep 6 07:03:31 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51f32f/trying_to_explain_ed_stuff_to_friends/
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I really wanted my friends support to help me maintain. I thought letting them know that I did have an ED and was very mildly underweight but wanted to maintain here for the sake of medical treatment they know about and would appreciate some support right now because life sucks and I'm too big for my own comfort.
Everyone has understood except for one person, and this one person seems to be being deliberately obtuse. She was the topic of [this](https://www.reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zquo8/so_on_the_way_home_from_my_first_therapy_session/) post and tl;dr she is starting to try and lose weight and is being really irresponsible with it, but just from carelessness, not from anxiety or fear of gaining/maintaining, as well as ignoring me telling her multiple times to eat a minimum of 1200 calories.
I've tried everything to explain to her about my own ED. Directed her to anorexia resources, had other friends write stuff out for me to send to her, explained my own anxieties and fears and how this ED affects me personally, and just been told stuff like 'you're very disciplined already and don't need to worry about gaining weight. you need to eat enough to gain to a healthy weight' directly after I told her I was looking to maintain and was terrified of gaining. When I told her gaining was out of the question all she had to say was 'but you're underweight' at which point she just stopped talking to me.
I'm so confused. This has been a multiple day discussion and she's continually ignoring me, ignoring my advice for her, and ignoring what an ED actually is. She told me today that she wasn't certain how serious I was being. GGGR
Where do I draw the line between 'bad friend' and 'clueless about eating disorders?' I'm really starting to lean towards bad friend by now. She isn't a native english speaker and initially I thought it might be down to nuances she didn't pick up but the subtle approach didn't work and the blunt approach worked even less :/
[Other] Every single night's a fight with my brain...
/u/turtle4president [5'2" | 106.2 | 20.12 | F/20]
Created: Tue Sep 6 06:19:45 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51ewu9/every_single_nights_a_fight_with_my_brain/
---
https://youtu.be/bIlLq4BqGdg
[Discussion] Self-care and Beauty Q+A September 06, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Tue Sep 6 06:02:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51euj9/selfcare_and_beauty_qa_september_06_2016/
---
Eating disorders are real, complex, and devastating conditions that can have serious consequences for physical health. Use this thread to discuss harm reduction and beauty tips, plus suggestions on how to build back up the physical self before and after engaging in disordered behaviors.
Please be wary of false advice and information. Be sure to research the facts before taking anyone's advice, no matter who they are. Remember that diagnosing members is unacceptable. **Anyone looking for medical guidance should seek the opinion of a medically licensed professional.**
*****
Self-care and beauty threads are posted every Tuesday.
Have any questions or concerns? Comment below, or [PM the mods.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FproED)
[Rant/Rave] Sugar and/or carb withdrawal symptoms? Omgggg
/u/smokesanddietcokes [Doesn't actually know what she's talking about.]
Created: Tue Sep 6 05:56:42 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51ets5/sugar_andor_carb_withdrawal_symptoms_omgggg/
---
Okay so I think that's whats happening? Big carby junk food binge for 4 days on my break away, limitless calories. Didn't quite fast yesterday (day after I came home), had some plain salad and then a tub of cottage cheese, and a low-cal hot chocolate before bed... but here I am with a CRACKING HEADACHE and feeling all woozy and my eyes hurt and wahh!
It's just withdrawal from all the shit, right? Since I didn't carry on eating it yesterday? Can it set in this soon?
Even though I have a carby sugary binge every week anyway, compared to what I've eaten recently it's usually nothing and only lasts one evening - so going back to my usual foods/intake the next day is pretty suffering-free in general.
D8 What do guys, what dooo! I don't want to give in and eat shit just to get rid of the headache. I don't even feel close to actually doing that though, which is a good thing, I'm very determined to AT LEAST get back to healthy foods even if I don't restrict perfectly.. but omg ouchies anyway. Mah head.
Also my legs, feet and arms seem slightly swollen with water retention. I look like I am made out of very pale sausages tbh.
I AM SEXY TODAY!
[Other] I tried scrapbooking today.....
/u/High_as_red [5'4 | F]
Created: Tue Sep 6 05:55:39 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51etns/i_tried_scrapbooking_today/
---
http://imgur.com/EU3QFvj
[Rant/Rave] Rant: Not good enough
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Sep 6 03:53:49 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51egp5/rant_not_good_enough/
---
[deleted]
Restrict vs Water Fast
/u/passthetablemanners [5'2 | 130 | 23.7 | -15 | 21F]
Created: Tue Sep 6 02:39:23 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51e9ki/restrict_vs_water_fast/
---
[removed]
[Rant/Rave] I am so scared
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Sep 6 02:17:19 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51e7eh/i_am_so_scared/
---
[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] I get real angry at people whom eat around me
/u/High_as_red [5'4 | F]
Created: Tue Sep 6 00:15:55 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51dv0l/i_get_real_angry_at_people_whom_eat_around_me/
---
It's like. It's me who's fucked up, not them. Eating their cereals and sandwiches and roast beef. I mean it's normal right? But Oh god does it drive me mad. I get irrationly angry at EVERYONE who eats...
[Rant/Rave] Boyfriend Ruined My Fast :(
/u/honeytarte [5'5" | CW: 119 | GW: 105 | -25 |]
Created: Tue Sep 6 00:11:21 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51dujo/boyfriend_ruined_my_fast/
---
I was planning on fasting from Sunday to Thursday (I have surfing class on Fridays and I need to be able to function for that, so I figured I'd break my fast on Thursday night and eat breakfast on Friday, and then fast again this weekend) but I had to break my fast at 48 hours because my boyfriend was acting super worried and he was all looking up things and telling me how I "had to eat at some point" and whatnot. And I know he's right but I just feel like, come on. I'm not even skinny yet. I don't need to eat *yet.* But I did eat and now I'm not sure if I want to fast again tomorrow and Wednesday like planned (even though I'll feel ick about it because it wasn't my perfect 4-and-a-half-day fast as planned) or just restrict the rest of this week.
In any event, I feel gross mentally and physically and I wanted to tell someone about it.
[Meme/Humor] How I feel after last night's awful binge.
/u/DontTellWendy [5'7" | 70kg | GW: 60kg | F]
Created: Mon Sep 5 23:55:14 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51dstf/how_i_feel_after_last_nights_awful_binge/
---
http://imgur.com/EoYrrSy
[Other] Not ED related, but I feel so down and I have no one to talk to. I'm just so sad all the time.
/u/throwawaylongbreakup
Created: Mon Sep 5 23:52:59 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51dskq/not_ed_related_but_i_feel_so_down_and_i_have_no/
---
[removed]
[Rant/Rave] Made it through the entire labor day weekend without eating!
/u/FasterFasting [5' 6" | 168 | BMI | M]
Created: Mon Sep 5 23:27:45 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51dpre/made_it_through_the_entire_labor_day_weekend/
---
Because literally nobody messaged or invited me to anything the entire weekend. Actually that's not strictly true, a friend texted me this afternoon but I didn't see it for an hour and then I never got a reply to my response. Presumably she found someone more interesting to chill with in the interim.
I'm pretty sure even if I get in shape I'm still going to be a boring, broke, bum piece of shit that nobody really feels the need to spend time with. I mean I have friends, but I'm pretty much filler for group situations.
Oh well, at least I'm on hour 75 of a water fast. I think I'm going to keep going until someone asks to have a meal or drink with me. Which probably means at least another week.
[Other] Hunger hurts, but starving works, when it costs too much to love
/u/throwaway03199519 [5'6 | CW 114 | GW 110| 18.47| -22| F]
Created: Mon Sep 5 22:22:25 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51dhk1/hunger_hurts_but_starving_works_when_it_costs_too/
---
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BK30r_SIZ-g
[Help] best APPS or sites to help lost ALOT of weight? (on mobile can't flair)
/u/Penelop8414
Created: Mon Sep 5 20:57:34 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51d5xk/best_apps_or_sites_to_help_lost_alot_of_weight_on/
---
[removed]
[Discussion] Met this new guy and can't stop obsessing about his ex?
/u/behindthearmory
Created: Mon Sep 5 20:42:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51d3kk/met_this_new_guy_and_cant_stop_obsessing_about/
---
She's 1728263lbs thinner. How do I cope?
Alternative title: how do I lose 40lbs in 2 weeks
How do you date with an ED?
[Rant/Rave] [rant] vicious positive feedback loop
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Sep 5 20:40:44 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51d3dt/rant_vicious_positive_feedback_loop/
---
[deleted]
[Meme/Humor] Going through post history, see myself say "I don't want to be that small again" and that instead my goal weight is basically what I am now. lolno..
/u/bumblebatty [5'7| 115 | 17.95 | -55 | F | GW 115 | UGW 105? ...99?]
Created: Mon Sep 5 20:33:17 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51d28s/going_through_post_history_see_myself_say_i_dont/
---
https://i.redd.it/qrlx3b5ojtjx.gif
[Help] Thinking about a water fast
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Sep 5 19:44:30 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51cupi/thinking_about_a_water_fast/
---
[deleted]
[Help] I feel the need to apologize
/u/runningonempty94 [5'5" | 146 | 24.6 | F]
Created: Mon Sep 5 19:39:23 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51ctxi/i_feel_the_need_to_apologize/
---
Today I was at dinner with a few friends and we were kind of joking around and the question came up: What's the worst thing you've ever done? And we all sat and thought about it for a few seconds and couldn't think of it and moved on.
But I thought about it a little later and I know the answer: dragging my two best friends through two years of my eating disorder while I refused to get help and kept coming to them for support as I self-destructed. I made them feel helpless, I was their burden, I tore them away from their other friends because they had to spend so much time on me.
So thinking of this, I really feel like I need to apologize to them. Which I know is stupid because I've done it a bunch of times before and I think it makes our relationship worse (reminding them of what it was like, making them feel bad that I feel bad) and it selfishly puts the spotlight on me and my problems again. And now that I'm relapsing again, I'm afraid if I break the seal about talking to them about this again, all the same problems will come back.
So I know I shouldn't do it, but I can't stop thinking about how I have this incredible, incredible debt to them that I can never pay back, and I don't know what to do.
[Goal] My take on the goals notebook that u/stephanynotstokes posted earlier today!
/u/salamanderqueen [5'9"| CW: 149 | SW: 180 | GW: 120 | -31 | 19F]
Created: Mon Sep 5 19:23:31 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51crc5/my_take_on_the_goals_notebook_that/
---
http://imgur.com/a/mtYfQ
[Help] Kind of Freaking Out
/u/properlylit [5'4" | fattie | F]
Created: Mon Sep 5 19:13:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51cptf/kind_of_freaking_out/
---
Just a teensy bit. So I've been super self conscious about my weight and I haven't been feeling sexy at all. Despite my grumbling about it he still wanted to have sex so I obliged. And then he lost his hardness.
I am just freaking out. I would like to lock myself in a closet and fast for a month or two. But I cannot because I am super open with him and he knows my food issues. Yeah.
I am just feeling so disgusting and would just greatly enjoy any ideas or coping mechanisms. Or else I will just keep sitting here imagining cutting out all of my fat.
[Rant/Rave] Comparing to my male friend
/u/Superderg
Created: Mon Sep 5 18:53:32 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51cmph/comparing_to_my_male_friend/
---
I'm staying with a fwb for a week. He's 275lbs and 6'6". I'm 5'8" and 209. I'm always comparing what we eat. He drinks a lot, but I felt so awful tonight when I was hungry and went for an apple. I couldn't even eat it, sitting beside him because he was too full after 2 sandwiches. I stopped eating it even though I'm hungry, or maybe not, who knows anymore. I logged everything he ate today to compare and he's way over what I am but it's because so much is in alcohol. I hate feeling so shitty over this
Sorry can't flair on mobile
[Help] Is there a reliable jean size chart?
/u/zealpeal [Height | CW | BMI | Weight Lost | Gender]
Created: Mon Sep 5 17:53:21 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51cd7p/is_there_a_reliable_jean_size_chart/
---
I bought a pair of jeans today they were a size 26 what would that be in a dress size?
[Discussion] Anyone used vitamin c to induce period?
/u/invincibletitan33 [5'4.5 | 49kg | 18.2 | F]
Created: Mon Sep 5 17:31:34 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51c9rs/anyone_used_vitamin_c_to_induce_period/
---
Maybe tmi but oh well.
Since I started restricting, my period have gone haywire and every one for the past 3 months has been crazy late.
I read that you can use vitamin C to help induce a period?
Have any of you ever tried this? Any success?
(no flair cos mobile)
[Thinspo] Alice In Chains - Them Bones [thinspo?][bonespo?]
/u/bloodketosexmagic
Created: Mon Sep 5 17:26:59 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51c90t/alice_in_chains_them_bones_thinspobonespo/
---
https://youtu.be/wFgAE5SgFnw
[Rant/Rave] Can't flair. On mobile. Just got back from vacation.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Sep 5 16:32:42 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51c02n/cant_flair_on_mobile_just_got_back_from_vacation/
---
[deleted]
[Other] King Adora- Big Isn't Beautiful
/u/Zombeedee [5'9 | shameful | -28 | female]
Created: Mon Sep 5 16:23:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51bylo/king_adora_big_isnt_beautiful/
---
https://www.youtube.com/attribution_link?a=hdvBxuVjC7M&u=%2Fwatch%3Fv%3DCy6zVWrPBJg%26feature%3Dshare
[Thinspo] Put down the food and look at your thighs.
/u/boochix [5ft3 | Massive | -28lbs | F]
Created: Mon Sep 5 15:43:52 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51bru5/put_down_the_food_and_look_at_your_thighs/
---
http://imgur.com/tH7AbzU
[Tip] Sub 100 calorie snacks!
/u/tallskinnywannabe8
Created: Mon Sep 5 15:42:59 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51brnm/sub_100_calorie_snacks/
---
http://imgur.com/21zUgOb
[Discussion] A favourite song that matches my soulless addiction to ana
/u/icantstopmeloning [5'5" | ~100lbs | 17.1 | ~-40 | F]
Created: Mon Sep 5 15:42:03 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51brhk/a_favourite_song_that_matches_my_soulless/
---
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j08iHBqiavU
This works for me! It's a cleanse where you don't have to fast, just keep it simple to simple berries grains etc. but it works a lot better if you fast. I usually loose 2-4 pounds in 2 days. It's kind of expensive though $20 and it taste horrible but it works.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Sep 5 15:18:47 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51bnd9/this_works_for_me_its_a_cleanse_where_you_dont/
---
https://i.reddituploads.com/d53a2016ddd249acac04888d0cf7f902?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=8e2e64da48734453f76179c17ab7c722
[Tip] I love these. These are packets of soup that you make in a cup and it's only 50cals per packet. Just add water! (Can't flair on mobile)
/u/stephanynotstokes [5'5| too fat |-76 lbs | F]
Created: Mon Sep 5 15:15:31 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51bmsq/i_love_these_these_are_packets_of_soup_that_you/
---
https://i.reddituploads.com/f39e6b9145724fd4ad3faa4d606cc76c?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=72adecdb68c59506ba91679c5e1d6a1b
[Thinspo] Unexpected thinspo!
/u/justputitdown [5'8" | 149 | 22.4 | 34.6 | F]
Created: Mon Sep 5 15:15:00 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51bmph/unexpected_thinspo/
---
http://i.imgur.com/622dVDZ.jpg
[Goal] This is so cool! I'm thinking about making one of these for myself (idk who the OP is, saw it on tumblr). I think this is motivation to be able to physically cross numbers off. Its like letting go . (Can't flair on mobile)
/u/stephanynotstokes [5'5| too fat |-76 lbs | F]
Created: Mon Sep 5 15:06:39 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51bl65/this_is_so_cool_im_thinking_about_making_one_of/
---
https://i.reddituploads.com/e9f539e5e2e542f9bc33e43d2b697a2b?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=46d2c2bd68b1bc40b5047bcbf608db93
This is SO cool. I never thought about making one of these (saw this on tumblr, not sure who the original OP is). I'm thinking about making one of these for myself.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Sep 5 15:02:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51bkfi/this_is_so_cool_i_never_thought_about_making_one/
---
https://i.reddituploads.com/4a52884647c64cc58bd2fd8b897cd6ee?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=f3e44f69701b8dfb68b1aca0d416e667
[Other] This is terrifying.
/u/boochix [5ft3 | Massive | -28lbs | F]
Created: Mon Sep 5 14:36:00 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51bfh4/this_is_terrifying/
---
http://imgur.com/zp5aYqU
[Intro] Intro :)
/u/elderflower_7 [5'5" | 129 | 21.3 | -11 | F]
Created: Mon Sep 5 14:29:35 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51be9s/intro/
---
Hi, I've been lurking on this sub for ~8 months now and I figured it's about time I introduce myself :) (not that I really know what to say though)
I've been struggling with weight/body issues since primary school, not that I was at any point actually overweight, but I don't look good either. Got into restricting in 8th grade and picked it back up again before this summer vacation, after I stopped cutting and needed something else to regain control. Also because I'm fucking fat.
I'm still living with my dad, so I have to be careful since he's noticed my (not) eating behaviours before and that was.. awkward, to say the least. My current method is to skip breakfast and lunch and eat nothing before dinner, so I can eat normally at dinner and won't raise any suspicions. I'm also vegan which makes it easier to decline food.
Yea uhm that's all I can think of :P
[Goal] First Ever Water Fast Complete - 4 days
/u/bloodketosexmagic
Created: Mon Sep 5 13:55:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51b85v/first_ever_water_fast_complete_4_days/
---
I've never fasted for more than 23 hours before, but after a carby binge on Thursday, the self loathing took over and i decided fuck it I'm fasting for 3 days.
I spent the first day calmly researching water fasting and r/fasting and realised its not as devastating or dangerous or dramatic as most see it.
PROS
-After the first day my chest and ass acne was literally all gone, i was astounded.
-I found my self much more calmer and "zen like", i didnt freak out and every little thing my SO did and my 'all or nothing' behaviour decreased. I felt floaty, almost high
-I lost 5.8 lbs in 4 days and 3 nights
-I realised i dont need to fucking eat every few hours, the physical hunger stopped after the first 24 hours and i was not in any danger, i hope this revelation will halt future binges.
CONS
-Didn't have much energy to do/engage in anything. I felt very weak and jelly-like the last 2 days
-Felt detached from everyone around me, started to look down on people eating lots and formed a superiority complex a little :/
-BORED AS FUCK.
Broke my fast with 2 eggs and 2 rashers of bacon, going to keep keto now and in a week fast again. This has changed my perspective on everything, for the good! :)
(On mobile no flair)
[Discussion] We need to talk about what binges actually are
/u/ThatsNotABinge
Created: Mon Sep 5 13:46:28 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51b6kd/we_need_to_talk_about_what_binges_actually_are/
---
[removed]
[Other] I just want to curl up and disappear. :(
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Sep 5 13:44:45 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51b68y/i_just_want_to_curl_up_and_disappear/
---
[deleted]
[Thinspo] Kate Moss - The Queen
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Sep 5 13:33:44 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51b493/kate_moss_the_queen/
---
https://imgur.com/a/sokqK
[Discussion] ED celebrities?
/u/poisonandvenom
Created: Mon Sep 5 12:45:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51avpb/ed_celebrities/
---
It's just been a thought occupying a lot of my time recently... I mean, we use a lot of celebrities and models and the like as thinspo here, right? No way they can ALL be ed? But then I watch documentaries on aspiring actresses and models and *all* of them restrict, purge, whatever....
Are there any celebrities out there you are nearly certain have a closet eating disorder? I'm looking for inspiration right now, because I've been wavering way too much recently and I need someone to focus on.
My bets would be Ariana Grande and Taylor Swift, but they're too short/tall respectively to be good inspiration for me...
[Intro] A delayed introduction (warning - extremely long)
/u/passthetablemanners [5'2 | 130 | 23.7 | -15 | 21F]
Created: Mon Sep 5 12:23:56 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51arv0/a_delayed_introduction_warning_extremely_long/
---
Hi all, I've been around for a couple of weeks and wanted to introduce myself.
My name is Molly and I just turned 21. This is probably gonna be a long one.
So... I was always a podgy kid, and it didn't help that I am also pretty short as well. I only really started noticing that I was chubby when I was around 13, my dad took me out for a walk and 'warned' me that I was getting a bit big and that I needed to eat less. Since that day I have been extremely self conscious about my body and appearance.
I don't want to sound conceited but I am quite pretty. This has been pointed out to me for years and I remember my grandma commenting at a family gathering when I was 14 that if I 'just lost 20 pounds' that I would truly be beautiful and that I was 'ruining my potential'.
My mum is clinically obese and my dad is on the high end of the overweight range. I struggled daily with my weight in my teens, often thinking that if I skipped lunch at school then I would be as skinny as my friends. However, I would come back home and gorge to my heart's content on crisps, chips and whatever sweet treats I could find. It's no surprise that at 5'2 I stayed pudgy throughout school and 6th form.
I never got much attention from guys until I turned 16 and my boobs had a major growth spurt. I remember one day I was walking to class when a group of guys were huddled and mentioned my name. Being me, I ducked into a corner to overhear what they were saying. 'Molly is so pretty but she is just too big for me man, can you imagine THAT in bed!'. They all snickered and I just sank to the floor in a heap of self loathing and pity. I went home, vowed to never eat a single thing again and 3 hours later binged on 4 bars of white chocolate.
Binging on milk laden foods has been my downfall since I can remember. I have always been allergic to milk and somehow, eating this exotic thing which I know will cause me to feel absolutely horrible, makes me want to eat it even more. I guess you could call it a form of self harm, and when I feel particularly low, I reach for my drawer of milky treats and devour whatever I can stuff into my mouth.
Ever since I was about 14 I have ran. I love running, it reduces my anxiety which is pretty horrendous and my depression as well. It also gets me out of my comfort zone as exercising infront of other people is one of my biggest fears. The thing is, I run well, 3 miles a day for a week or two and then I just stop. Consistency is not my forte and this has hindered so many aspects in my life so far.
By the time I hit 18 I knew something drastic had to be done. I had been talking online to a guy who wanted to see me, but I wasn't having it, I didn't want him to know how fat I was. I knew that if he saw more than my face then he would instantly be put off. I mean, who wants to date a whale? Who would love a whale?
I had been on so many drastic diets which took off 5/10 pounds here and there but nothing that made me feel good. I had 2 months until he was going to come to visit me. I couldn't put it off again, so, I did the only thing which I thought I could do. I stopped eating. At first it was horrible, but after a few weeks I got used to the empty feeling. I kept buying small clothes as rewards because I would finally be able to fit into them. My parents knew something was wrong but I hid it well, leaving plates and dishes around the house, wrappers of snacks I had taken one bite out of and thrown away.
After a month of this I upped my calorie intake to 200 a day. I lost about 20 pounds through the whole ordeal and felt amazing. Long story short, he came, he loved me and I was madly in love. Too in love. I started slacking, eating biscuits and pizza and cake. Before I knew it, I was back to my original weight. My boyfriend didn't care, or at least he told me he didn't. I remember one day him telling me that I 'look good chubby'. I lost it. All my hard work, for what? For a gross, disgusting girl with stretch marks and thighs the size of Europe.
Time for round two.
I was off to university in 2 months and I knew I wanted to be hot when I arrived. I cut my calories down to 700 a day and ran at least 5 miles a day, losing about 30 pounds in 2 months. I was at an all time low weight and even though in the mirror I saw a beast, I was getting compliments left right and centre so I knew something was going right.
My boyfriend had changed. He hated the new found attention I was getting with my new body. He would demand to know where I was at all times and called me many names which I don't wish to repeat. I stuck with him because I thought that no one else would accept or love me, and by the time freshers week had rolled round I was miserable and felt lonely while being coddled.
I cheated on him in the first week of university. I still don't feel bad about it. He was a terrible boyfriend. I broke up with him and essentially whored myself around for the next year, losing more and more weight until I finally saw 97 pounds on the scales. I had never been more alive or happy in my life. I was getting so much attention. Boys were fighting over me at university and I loved it. I starting purging when I went over 1000 calories and couldn't stop, some days I would intentionally eat more just so I could purge.
One day I looked in the mirror and saw a whale again. How had I got so fat? Why were the scales lying to me? There was no way I was under 100 pounds. This was all some sick, twisted prank to make me think I was slimmer than I was. So I started running at 3am because I didn't want anyone to see me, I didn't get any sleep and I didn't eat much at all. I focused more on my weight than my studies, and I barely scraped through first year.
I kept this up through summer and overdosed on different pills 3 times in a 2 month period. I laughed it off, telling my parents that this was 'normal'. I caught my mum crying one night, and that broke my heart. At the same time, I thought she was being pathetic, and she was just jealous of my size.
I went back to uni and second year hit me hard. I was used to not working at all and all of a sudden I actually had to put effort into something other than my weight, running or guys! No fricking way was I doing that. I didn't go to class, I had a string of guys following me around and I was manipulating them all into doing stuff for me. I had no conscience. I didn't care about anyone except myself. A month passed and I had a sit down meeting with my tutor, he told me I was going to fail the semester and that I had to defer the year. I thought it was a great idea, I didn't have to study for a whole year, I could focus on getting skinnier and better. Little did I know, the opposite was going to happen.
It hit me. I got home with nothing to do, no one to impress, no boyfriend and I was starving. I ate and ate and ate for 3 months straight. I got rid of my mirrors and convinced myself I was still skinny. I put on 50 pounds in 3 months. When I finally had the courage to weight myself I burst into tears. What had I done to myself?
This was a month ago. Ever since then my top priority has been to get slim by the time I go back to university. I only have a month left. My current boyfriend says I suit the curves really well and he loves my thighs. I just don't agree. I am disgusting. I break down whenever I think about what I have become, which is often, very often.
Sorry for the long post guys. I feel like I needed to get a lot off my chest. If only it would come from my wobbly thighs instead!
Molly X
[Help] [Help] I guess I started my period?
/u/082616 [5' 6.5"/128/20.36/F]
Created: Mon Sep 5 11:05:17 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51adrf/help_i_guess_i_started_my_period/
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Ok. So of course this happens on the two day trip I have with my dad! Ugh! We were in the store Saturday and I feel a LOT come out and I immediately went to the bathroom. I freaked the fuck out with what I saw. I didn't know then, but I started my period. I tried my best to wrap toilet paper around my underwear and act like everything was fine. I think I put a tampon in then or maybe later on when I noticed stuff on the toilet paper from before. Ok. Next morning. Check tampon. Yep. But still confused. Like, this is two weeks early confused. Fast forward to me going to a gas station with my dad waiting outside and I can't find ANY tampons! None! Wtf?! So I tell my dad we have to go somewhere else, they didn't have what I needed. We go to Family Dollar, I get the tampons and pads and we go. So now since then I'm 100% sure I started my period and 100% confused as to how and why it started this early in the month.
As always, thanks for reading and your comments <3 <3 <3
EDIT: Not on birth control. I'm gay and have no other reason to be on it.
[Discussion] Another favorite song of mine about Eating disorders...
/u/ItsJustJeffrey
Created: Mon Sep 5 10:28:59 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51a76y/another_favorite_song_of_mine_about_eating/
---
https://youtu.be/zNK_r2QAXAo
[Rant/Rave] Clothing Sizes.
/u/peanutbutteredbanana
Created: Mon Sep 5 10:14:53 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51a4jd/clothing_sizes/
---
I know this is a common post about sizes but I have to rant anyway. I went to buy a homecoming dress yesterday, and they only had a handful of dresses that were smaller than a 3/4. I couldn't even find a 0, which is the size I truly need, so I had to settle for a 1/2. It's a little bit too big, so basically if I lose more weight it won't be able to fit :(. I've been restricting again, but now I have to maintain so this stupid dress will (barely) fit. I feel bad for all the truly skinny girls out there, how do they find clothes that even fit?? At least I managed to find a cute dress lmao
-like usual, on mobile can't flair. sorry :(
[Discussion] Daily Food Diary! September 05, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Mon Sep 5 10:03:04 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51a2jo/daily_food_diary_september_05_2016/
---
This is a daily food diary thread for September 05, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
[Intro] Decided to introduce myself after lurking for a while.
/u/raspberryfleur [5'4 | 139 | 23.9 | -21 | Female]
Created: Mon Sep 5 09:46:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/519zun/decided_to_introduce_myself_after_lurking_for_a/
---
Preface: Intro is pretty much copied off from me posting off-reddit; just added some details for clairty
Hello, my name is Samantha and i'm 19 years old.
I have stumbled onto this subreddit after facing some issues of my own for a couple of weeks now. I have always felt insecure about my body, especially the day I hit puberty. My mother always told me to cover up, that I was disgusting and fat. Meanwhile, she made me feel like the biggest whale on the planet while meanwhile she was 250+ pounds and piling on the weight. So I lost weight the way I only knew how: by restricting food.
For a while, it worked. I was too depressed to eat due to other issues. Throwing up in the mornings was a daily occurrence, due to anxiety. I stayed at a stable weight, and was happy with it for a while.
I moved to a new town, and got a boyfriend. I was happy, except for the fact that I was starting to get fatter and fatter eating how we ate. We broke up due to unrelated reasons, and my mom is back to shaming me on how fat and terrible I look. She even went as far as to telling all her friends how fat and gross I have gotten, telling me to exercise more, put down the fork and pinch me everywhere. And she's still obese.
My breaking point was 2 weeks ago. I was talking to a guy I really liked, and we swapped pictures. He said I looked "okay, but you're kinda fat." And then the next morning, he pinched my arm fat and called me fluffy in front of his friend. I cried for days. I cried so hard that my nose bled, and I had a huge headache. It drove me to restrict again.
And I have, for two weeks. I'm too ashamed to own a scale right now, afraid what the number will read.
Sorry for the long story. It's nice to see other people in the same position as me, and I hope to get to know some of you better <3
[Other] I had a flu and my mom brought me a ton of food
/u/Mi__ra [165cm |50 kg | 18.6 | 0 | F]
Created: Mon Sep 5 09:09:14 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/519toy/i_had_a_flu_and_my_mom_brought_me_a_ton_of_food/
---
And now I have binged and purged almost all of it. She barely could carry all of it to my apartment. I feel like shit. Not because of binging and purging, I've kind of given up with that right now, but because my mom brought that food to help me get better, she meant well, and what did I do? Something she definitely wishes I didn't do. I won't tell her, of course, but I don't feel too good about myself right now.
[Thinspo] Dress up games are great thinspo for me - all the dolls are so skinny
/u/c_marier [5'6"| 112 | 18.1 | -13 | 22F]
Created: Mon Sep 5 09:09:06 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/519to5/dress_up_games_are_great_thinspo_for_me_all_the/
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http://www.azaleasdolls.com/index.php
[Rant/Rave] "As long as you keep running"
/u/c_marier [5'6"| 112 | 18.1 | -13 | 22F]
Created: Mon Sep 5 09:01:25 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/519sdk/as_long_as_you_keep_running/
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My boyfriend started lifting this past year and is now into healthy eating, bulking/cutting, protein shakes etc. I'm totally supportive - he is being very healthy about it and I don't mind his new biceps ;). We were having a conversation last night about health and calories and food etc, because I was saying that if you're going to have a soda, you might as well have it be diet. Soda is bad for you, diet soda is still bad for you but at least it doesn't have all that sugar. Basically I was trying to cover for the fact that while I love diet Coke, I literally can't remember the last time I've had a full-calorie soda and the thought of doing so makes me panic.
Anyway, during the conversation, my boyfriend dropped this comment: "You're probably the most in-shape person I know, as long as you keep running."
Iknowiknowiknow he didn't mean it in a "better stay in shape or else" and he's always super good about telling me I'm beautiful/attractive and still would be even if I gained weight (he doesn't know about my eating issues). But I can't stop thinking about the comment.
Does he mean if I stopped running, I would gain weight and not be in shape? Or that if I stopped running, I wouldn't have the same athletic thinness and wouldn't be as attractive? Does it even matter because either way I now want to lose weight faster than ever???
[Rant/Rave] Parents left early. So glad I at least maintained instead of gaining like I was worried about!
/u/bumblebatty [5'7| 115 | 17.95 | -55 | F | GW 115 | UGW 105? ...99?]
Created: Mon Sep 5 08:18:18 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/519lno/parents_left_early_so_glad_i_at_least_maintained/
---
They left a few weeks early. I'm actually really sad because I miss them. I wish they would live in my city, but just, like, not in the same house hahah.
But I'm also really really happy I can get back to my usual eating habits. I was so convinced I was going to have gained five pounds if not ten with how much I was eating. But I maintained!
I can't believe I maintained. I drank booze, had queso, CUPCAKES (okay more like a couple bites from one), and so much chocolate. I never keep sweets at home, I thought I didn't like them lol... At least I could just not eat while at work. And I was able to get away with some safe foods and low cal days to balance out the bad ones.
Anyway celebrating freedom again with fasting today. Because tomorrow I have a stressful lunch that is supposed to be a reward at work hahah...
[Help] Dealing with MyFitness Pal
/u/terahcrow [5'4" |CW: 165 |GW:120 | 28.32 | -2 | F]
Created: Mon Sep 5 07:41:06 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/519gaf/dealing_with_myfitness_pal/
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I put in my calories for the day, but because it was actually low (for once) it won't give me my breakdown and the screen saying "if everyday was like today...)
I've not had this yet and I don't know how to feel about it. I want to know if it will get me to my goal weight. Any suggestions, or is there a calorie calculator that can tell me the same thing with trying to coach me away?
I'm so fucking fat. I hate myself. I wish I could cut it all off of me.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Sep 5 07:23:01 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/519drs/im_so_fucking_fat_i_hate_myself_i_wish_i_could/
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http://imgur.com/NxfrXn3
[Tip] Sucralose + Aspartame = Delicious!
/u/kpatable [5'9" | 124.6 | 18.1/18.4 | -22.4 | F]
Created: Mon Sep 5 06:30:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51970a/sucralose_aspartame_delicious/
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I sweeten my own stuff (mostly yogurt and coffee), and I use artificial (zero/low calorie) sweeteners. I found out that putting both sucralose and aspartame in something makes it taste nearly exactly like something is sweetened with normal sugar. Or at least it doesn't have an aftertaste. Just wanted to let you all know!
[Discussion] Weekly Stats Update! September 05, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Mon Sep 5 06:03:41 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5193oa/weekly_stats_update_september_05_2016/
---
This is the weekly status thread for September 05, 2016.
The weekly status thread is to help motivate our users, and to eventually see how far they've come! Be it for weight loss, weight gain, or maintaining- everyone is welcome. Previous updates are archived [here.](http://www.reddit.com/r/proED/wiki/archives)
Please include the following information (with all necessary units of measurement):
* Height:
* Current weight (CW):
* Highest weight (HW):
* Lowest weight (LW):
* Goal weight (GW):
* Ultimate goal weight (UGW):
* Weight lost (WL):
* BMI: ([Use this to calculate your BMI](https://people.maths.ox.ac.uk/trefethen/bmi_calc.html))
* Age:
* Gender expression:
Here's a handy-dandy copy/paste of the above format:
* Height:
* CW:
* HW:
* LW:
* GW:
* UGW:
* WL:
* BMI:
* Age:
* Gender expression:
*****
Status threads are posted every Monday.
Have any questions or concerns? Comment below, or [PM the mods.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FproED)
[Other] The greatest song about eating disorders ever - The Lyrics are Beautiful (Manic Street Preachers - 4st 7lb)
/u/SlicinUpEyeBalls- [Height: 179cm | CW: 57kg | BMI: 18.1 |Gender: M]
Created: Mon Sep 5 05:13:42 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/518y4b/the_greatest_song_about_eating_disorders_ever_the/
---
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JhxMQy9a8cA
[Discussion] i'm on the verge of a binge - so please tell me; what's been the best result(s) you've had from losing weight?
/u/awfuljusttosee [5'5" | 59.2kg | 20.98 | -7.7kg | F]
Created: Mon Sep 5 02:59:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/518kp5/im_on_the_verge_of_a_binge_so_please_tell_me/
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someone's reaction, fitting into a certain type of clothes, feeling healthier, anything!
[Discussion] booze and calories
/u/gloomhoney [5'1" | 158 | 30 | -2 | gw: 140| ugw: 110 | female]
Created: Sun Sep 4 23:52:25 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5181ue/booze_and_calories/
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its driving me crazy. i want to get thinner, yet i keep drinking because i hate being sober (sounds dramatic, but i like the buzz). i need to find a medium (my current problem is i love wine, and my other solution is gin/vodka with carbonated water and tea [which can steep cold within 5-6 min if in carbonated water with either of those]).
any other tips to keep low cal and still get fucked?
[Discussion] How do you guys deal with stretch marks?
/u/ikillsouls [5' 2" | 105 | 19.2 | -21 lb | f]
Created: Sun Sep 4 23:04:45 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/517wex/how_do_you_guys_deal_with_stretch_marks/
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Okay, so I gained weight this summer. Fast. As a result, I now have stretch marks on my thighs and my hips. Have any of you had any success in diminishing the appearance of stretch marks? I just want them gone :(
[Discussion] Maybr TMI bathroom question
/u/thelonelykitten_
Created: Sun Sep 4 22:23:14 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/517r0t/maybr_tmi_bathroom_question/
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After a week of restricting to 500~ cal a day, I ate like a "normal" person(probably still under 1000), I had a tortilla with ground turkey and onion and peppers, 3 ciders and a piece of chocolate, I'm currently sitting on the toilet shorting my brains out. Anyone else??
Hope I don't stink up my boyfriend's bathroom 🙃
[Help] Science of stomach size?
/u/GoalsandGossip [5'10" | CW 181.4 | BMI 26 | GW 175 | UGW 125 | F |]
Created: Sun Sep 4 21:27:10 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/517jiv/science_of_stomach_size/
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I am having a hard time finding info on stomach size. Like is shrinking your stomach a thing? Most sciencey links say no! What??
[Tip] My current choice that's cheaper than a microwave dinner and less caloric for when I'm on the go. Here's a breakdown of calorie/protein/carb/salt for Gerber Graduates
/u/mermaid_puppy [5'11" | 137lb | UGW 115 | F]
Created: Sun Sep 4 20:30:27 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/517blq/my_current_choice_thats_cheaper_than_a_microwave/
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[Arranged from lowest cal to highest!] Each meal is between $1.50-2 and is relatively low cal. If you take the packaging off, the brand is fairly unrecognizable. You could pass it off as a specialty meal (aka not baby food) and it really looks like you're eating a decent amount!
*Pasta Pick-Ups Ravioli, Spinach and Cheese, 6 oz. (3oz drained)*
Cal:70
Pro: 3
Carb: 11
Salt: 240
*Ravioli, Beef and Tomato, 6 oz (3oz drained)*
Cal: 70
Pro: 3
Carb: 11
Salt: 260
*Ravioli, Chicken and Carrot, 6 oz (3oz drained)*
Cal: 70
Pro: 3
Carb: 12
Salt: 240
*Yellow Rice with Chicken Vegetables 6.67oz (5.37 oz drained)*
Cal: 90
Pro: 4
Carb: 13
Salt: 300
*Creamy Chicken Stew with Green Beans & Carrots, 6.67 (5.37 oz drained)*
Cal: 90
Pro: 4
Carb: 12
Salt:300
*Pasta Stars in Meat Sauce with Green Beans, 6.80-Ounce*
Cal:120
Pro: 5
Carb:15
Salt: 290
*Chicken and Parmesan Ravioli in Tomato Sauce, 4.5 Ounce*
Cal: 120
Pro: 4
Carb: 20
Salt: 250
*Mashed Potatoes and Gravy with Roasted Chicken with Carrots 5.3 oz.*
Cal: 130
Pro: 5
Carb: 13
Salt: 160
*Rice, Sweet Potato, Carrot and Chicken, 6 oz*
Cal: 130
Pro: 5
Carb: 23
Salt: 340
*Cheese Ravioli in Tomato Sauce with Mixed Vegetables, 6.6-Ounce*
Cal: 130
Pro: 4
Carb: 20
Salt: 230
*Mashed Potatoes with Meatloaf Nuggets, 6.67 oz. (5.37 oz drained)*
Cal: 130
Pro: 5
Carb:14
Salt: 270
*Berries Cream cereal, 4.5 oz*
Cal: 130
Pro: 4
Carb: 24
Salt: 130
*Apple Cinnamon Cereal, 4.5-Ounce*
Cal: 140
Pro: 2
Carb: 30
Salt: 130
*Spaghetti Rings in Meat Sauce, 6 Ounce*
Cal:150
Pro:6
Carb:22
Salt: 270
*Spaghetti Rings in Meat Sauce, 6 oz*
Cal: 150
Pro: 6
Carb: 22
Salt:270
*Macaroni & Cheese with Seasoned Peas & Carrots, 6.6-Ounce*
Cal: 160
Pro:6
Carb: 20
Salt: 300
[Rant/Rave] Why do I even let myself have a little bit of my binge foods? -___-
/u/kpatable [5'9" | 124.6 | 18.1/18.4 | -22.4 | F]
Created: Sun Sep 4 19:21:41 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/517202/why_do_i_even_let_myself_have_a_little_bit_of_my/
---
I had a relatively acceptable amount of pizza tonight (pizza being my most unsafe food). 1040 calories worth. My total intake today was 2100, and that is acceptable considering my intake this week. Now I just want to eat more and more and more pizza. It was SO FUCKING GOOD. Why did I think this would ever satisfy me? God. I just want to order another pizza. I don't know what to do.
[Tip] Asian Medley Stir-fry in Skinny Girl Dressing!
/u/mckenziemudkip [5'2 | CW:109(-21) GW:88 | BMI 20.45| F/20]
Created: Sun Sep 4 19:21:29 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5171z6/asian_medley_stirfry_in_skinny_girl_dressing/
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Sooooo, I've really been enjoying skinny girl dressings lately.
Today I tried a little low sodium soy sauce mixed with the poppy seed dressing, and it tastes very "american-chinese food" - esque. Especially when stir-fried with Asian Medley veggies. Maybe throw in some shirataki noodles?
Just thought I'd give the tip for anyone craving Chinese take out c:
[Other] I love cooking
/u/thelonelykitten_
Created: Sun Sep 4 18:05:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/516r1x/i_love_cooking/
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but I can't bring myself to eat any of it. It cook for my boyfriend and myself and I have so much fun but I can't sit down and eat what I made. Just today I've made fajitas, chicken and potatoes and a huge thing of chili to put in the crock pot tomorrow. But I know I won't eat any of it.
[Tip] Just something cute that I found on tumblr
/u/tallskinnywannabe8
Created: Sun Sep 4 17:28:07 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/516lsu/just_something_cute_that_i_found_on_tumblr/
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http://imgur.com/gjThu1W
[Discussion] Because you were thin
/u/thebondoftrust
Created: Sun Sep 4 17:28:03 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/516lsh/because_you_were_thin/
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What happened to you *because* you were thin?
[Rant/Rave] Back from my break away..
/u/smokesanddietcokes [Doesn't actually know what she's talking about.]
Created: Sun Sep 4 15:16:55 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5161km/back_from_my_break_away/
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I ate enough calories to put on around 5lbs. No, not kidding. I went crazy. It was a convention and it turned out that even though we had self catering accommodation, there was no way of cooking - and the stores around us were sold out of most things anyway, so you ate whatever someone had managed to rustle up. But mostly, I just used it all as an excuse and went crazy.
Snacks were solely chocolate and cakes, and plentiful. Meals were take aways and corner store mayo-laden sandwiches. I was not the only one eating like this, but I would imagine I got more cals because I snacked way more than anyone else. My appetite would fire off a lot more often than my partner or friends appetites.
I did walk between 6-10 miles every day. We barely slept, perhaps 4-5 hours a night. We were constantly on our feet and didn't sit down long when we did sit. Not enough activity to burn off all the cals, but I'm hoping it has some benefits still (Usually I do workout, but between running 2x a week and gym 3x a week which adds up to at most something like 8h exercise per week, I'm pretty much sitting on my butt exhausted.. I had the energy to keep up the last few days, from all the eating I guess).
I think my body has been through a major shock. Huge calories from very different foods to what I normally eat (even when I binge, it's *never* on such fatty things like take aways), all the walking and being so consistently active.. I have no idea what will happen to it as a result of it all.
The first thing I notice are my legs being swollen up to three times their normal size, with even my most loose socks leaving very deep indents on my legs. Massive water retention - a combo of the eating and walking? My belly is so swollen I legitimately look 9 months pregnant. I am not lean. I feel a layer of fat on my body. My shoulder bones are no longer so pointy. My face is VERY round.
I am not going to weigh myself for a couple of months. I am going to crave like crazy tomorrow, but I am going to stick to raw veg and tea until the cravings fuck off. I am going to go for a run tomorrow, and keep to my usual exercise routine, but besides that rest my poor swollen legs. When they have healed from the past few days, I am going to try and include more walking in my week.
I had a think about my situation. I decided I am getting rid of a weight goal for now *completely*. I am going to try and not reinstate it for a few months. My goal now is to get back into my routine and habits I am comfortable with. That includes fasting and restricting, with one day of no counting but continued efforts to lower cals on that day.
I don't at all feel like myself right now. I can't even consider whether I feel fat or not, but I'm sure I do.
I wish I were still on my break away, with my partner and friends.. but in a way, it's good to be back. I hope you are all well <3
[Help] Starting college tomorrow
/u/smallsmallersmallest [168cm | CW 50.9kg GW 46kg | 18.09 | -10.1kg | F]
Created: Sun Sep 4 15:15:16 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5161bu/starting_college_tomorrow/
---
I know there's been plenty of back to school/college/uni/work posts recently so sorry for the repetition, I just wanted to share my excitement about the new food situation. First off, I'm gonna be busier so I won't have as much time to eat, I'll be away from my kitchen at home during the day so I can't just grab food, I don't like spending money so I will be less tempted to buy food at the cafeteria. I'm excited about finding low calorie lunches I can eat at college, I'm excited about getting back on track after being on holiday and eating everything in sight (seaside rock and fudge and ice cream, no self control). I'm looking forward to, if everything goes to plan, getting to my goal weights.
For the past few months I've had nothing to do, job searching isn't going so well and I've been in between switching from 6th form to college, so I've had nothing to do and the temptation to eat has been high. But being away from home more, walking more, studying, being around thinspo girls at college and probably some reverse thinspo too, hopefully getting a job, all this will keep me busier and keep me away from eating.
As a side note, does anyone have any ideas on the kind of lunches I could bring with me? I know there's been a few posts about this already but I'm so fussy with my eating, I don't like vegetables or fruit sadly, and I know that makes me sound like a child but I have an issue with them that I can't seem to shake. Most low calorie meals include those foods so I'm a little stumped. If anyone has any suggestions they would be greatly appreciated.
(This is UK college btw, I think college means university in America? That always confused me so please correct me if I'm wrong, but I don't want to confuse any non-brits.)
[Discussion] Swollen lymph nodes due to purging?
/u/taeyeons-comrade [perpetual shame]
Created: Sun Sep 4 15:01:20 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/515z0f/swollen_lymph_nodes_due_to_purging/
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I have a bunch of questions so get ready to educate me.
I went to the doctor and one of the first things she did was feel the sides of my neck. I'm really curious if she felt any swelling or not. I remember a post where a girl asked if you could tell if her face was swollen from purging and everyone said yes and I could not see for the life of me no matter how hard I looked at the photo.
Also, how often to you have to purge in order for them to swell? I only purged once or twice that week.
[Discussion] ate tooons of fair.food
/u/venetianrosequartz [5'6"|CW 140|HW 153|LW 130|GW 135|UGW 112|WL -13| BMI 22.6|Female]
Created: Sun Sep 4 15:00:03 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/515yt5/ate_tooons_of_fairfood/
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helo i ate likr so much. i had deep fried mac n cheese AND deep fried green beans all with fatty fatty ranch. and THEN i had a choclate dipped cheesecake im so happy. i wasnt binging and im not going to purge for once i was having a good time. ive probably gained like one pound of fat and pounds of water Wright but it was so worth it. ive lost seven pounfs in the past two months anyeay. anyway pals what have ur done to #TreatYourself recently? ps im so tired im not sure ill remember this
[Discussion] More than Reddit ED community - Twitter, MFP, etc
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Sep 4 14:58:48 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/515ymr/more_than_reddit_ed_community_twitter_mfp_etc/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] Only having one scale is making me crazy!!!!
/u/downtownhomebound
Created: Sun Sep 4 14:51:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/515xfy/only_having_one_scale_is_making_me_crazy/
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I live in two separate places, and i switch every week. Which means that I either can't weigh myself for a week OR that I have to carry my big ass heavy scale with me every week, and if I don't have a scale there is a 70% chance I will binge all the way through the week (I've had pasta every damn day for 4 days in a row) and when I get to the scale it will say the same as before or it says I've gained. Then I restrict heavily, lose a little, then I move back, and everything starts again. Ughhh I hate this and I know i'm going to have to carry it with me every week... Why do electronics have to be so dang expensive??? Is this relatable to anybody???
[Rant/Rave] "Forgive me father, for I have binged"
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Sep 4 14:18:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/515rsc/forgive_me_father_for_i_have_binged/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] How did I gain 4kg in 12 hours?!
/u/invincibletitan33 [5'4.5 | 49kg | 18.2 | F]
Created: Sun Sep 4 13:58:04 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/515od9/how_did_i_gain_4kg_in_12_hours/
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I know realistically at the end of the day you're generally heavier but 4 kgs heavier?!
This morning I was 50kg.
Just weighed myself (12 hours later) out of curiosity and I'm 54?!
I know that I've eaten more today than probably the two previous days combined - but not more than 1300 calories. And I did strenuous work for 6 hours.
Really hoping I'll wake up tomorrow at 50kg cos otherwise I'm back to square one.
Kinda stunned and just imagining 4 kilos (?!) of food and water sitting in my stomach.... :O
[Intro] Intro! :)
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Sep 4 13:29:06 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/515jdj/intro/
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[deleted]
[Goal] [NSV] this has never happened to me before
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Sep 4 12:44:17 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/515bmv/nsv_this_has_never_happened_to_me_before/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] I want to eat
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Sep 4 12:39:36 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/515asx/i_want_to_eat/
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[deleted]
[Help] Post-workout nausea and stomach pain
/u/passthetablemanners [5'2 | 130 | 23.7 | -15 | 21F]
Created: Sun Sep 4 12:30:14 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51598h/postworkout_nausea_and_stomach_pain/
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This is probably common when restricting but have any of you got any tips to help post-workout pain and nausea?
I ran around 7k today and have been eating around 500kcal daily for the last few weeks. I have been drinking a lot of water and taking supplements. I climbed up Snowdon last week on 300kcal and didn't notice any side effects so I'm confused as to why they are appearing now.
Thanks for anyone who replies!
[Discussion] How did your face change?
/u/kickkkasss [5'5 | CW:134 | GW:110 | F]
Created: Sun Sep 4 12:06:21 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51556t/how_did_your_face_change/
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I have a really round face and I'm hoping my face will be a little more defined when I get to my goal weight. You guys who have reached your goal weights or have noticed a difference in your faces, what is the difference?
[Help] I'm freaking out
/u/TemporaryAccount_101 [5'3'' | AHAHAH | -5.5kgs | 18F]
Created: Sun Sep 4 12:06:01 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51554s/im_freaking_out/
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I just ate 2 tablespoons of Nutella and a slice of pie.
As soon as I ate them I regretted it (and yet I ate them wtf ), but immediately afterwards I went running and did HIIT.
I'm gonna do an hour of yoga strengthening as well.
Did I fuck up that badly? I feel like I fucked up big time, I can't even skip dinner.
Should I do something more? Idk what got into me, I was doing so well, I'm freaking out so much.
[Discussion] Is it really about weight?
/u/Saltycook [5'4"| 127# |21.8| -36# | Female]
Created: Sun Sep 4 11:51:29 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5152q8/is_it_really_about_weight/
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In one of my more existentialist moods, this sorry of thing occurred to me. Having an ED is line a weird coping mechanism, at least for me. The more I read on it, the more I realize that I have tendencies that started long before I had a problem with weight. The body image stuff is still a huge part of it, but so is the mad food lust. It just seems that weight specifically isn't the main target. Thoughts?
*Edit: I'm on mobile, does anyone else notice that if you click'flair' the menu will be on the far right of the screen, such that you have to scroll way over? You can flair though, on a droid*
I wish someone would notice
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Sep 4 11:50:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5152hl/i_wish_someone_would_notice/
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[deleted]
[Thinspo] Fit thinspo
/u/taeyeons-comrade [perpetual shame]
Created: Sun Sep 4 10:26:30 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/514ojt/fit_thinspo/
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http://i.imgur.com/IPsbZZq.jpg
[Discussion] Daily Food Diary! September 04, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Sun Sep 4 10:02:21 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/514kt1/daily_food_diary_september_04_2016/
---
This is a daily food diary thread for September 04, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
[Other] It's so funny how clueless my bf can be
/u/citrus_cunt [5' 9"| 139lbs | 19.5| +2lbs | F]
Created: Sun Sep 4 10:01:15 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/514kmt/its_so_funny_how_clueless_my_bf_can_be/
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My #1 fave ed song is Me&Mia by Ted Leo and The Pharmacists. And my bf likes it to, but for totally different reasons. He has no clue that it's about bulimia and he likes to play it for me to cheer me up. (I always sing and dance along- it honestly makes me happy cause it's so upbeat)
I just think it's so silly that he has no idea and hasn't made the connect.
[Rant/Rave] Calorie counts are liesss
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Sep 4 08:45:25 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5149ez/calorie_counts_are_liesss/
---
[deleted]
[Help] Made a promise
/u/Little_peachgirl
Created: Sun Sep 4 07:50:13 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5141o0/made_a_promise/
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I feel so gross and bloated. I went to a concert last night had a couple beers and a huge breakfast this morning... I'm sitting alone in my hotel room trying to not puke it up because I promised my boyfriend.
[Help] I feel such a weight from no one knowing I'm relapsing
/u/runningonempty94 [5'5" | 146 | 24.6 | F]
Created: Sun Sep 4 07:49:45 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5141lu/i_feel_such_a_weight_from_no_one_knowing_im/
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I'm heading towards my 4th relapse, and through my 2nd and 3rd I had friends who knew and would listen to me and help me. Which made it so much less awful and makes me feel so much less alone. And now I'm faced with whether to tell them again or to go through this on my own. And it feels like such a big weight to carry on my own (no pun intended), but it feels selfish to tell them. I would make them worried and disappointed that I've let this happen again, and I'd either have to get professional help (which I don't want right now) or ignore their advice/frustrate them/make them feel helpless. And I feel like I can't take up so much of their headspace with my problems AGAIN. I don't know what to do.
Just wondering if I got what it takes to join your club.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Sep 4 07:19:18 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/513xrj/just_wondering_if_i_got_what_it_takes_to_join/
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http://imgur.com/a/eg3l3
[Thinspo] Sunday Thinspo: staying in bed
/u/dbishop22
Created: Sun Sep 4 06:46:59 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/513txv/sunday_thinspo_staying_in_bed/
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https://imgur.com/a/L3Icr
[Rant/Rave] My boyfriend's moving in with me, so i can't be bulimic anymore
/u/frameworkautoco
Created: Sun Sep 4 02:50:14 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5138co/my_boyfriends_moving_in_with_me_so_i_cant_be/
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I guess I'm just getting this off my chest? Sorry if this is the wrong sub for this, just felt like someone might relate. We'll see.
My boyfriend of 6 months is moving in with me in a few weeks. He knows I've dealt with anorexia and bulimia for most of my life, and is fully supportive of any steps toward me being happier.
I've been trying to break the cycles of bulimia and get more on a regular restrictive diet for a while, and now that he'll be living with me I won't have any alone time to binge and purge. Ive gotten so out of control, I havent had a roommate in 6 years and have mostly been single.
I'm so excited! We've been planning meal prep and I've put together my daily meal plan (490 cal through vegetables +coffee, with another 400-600 through alcohol [I drink a lot] to start with). It's high, but I've got only 10 lbs or so to lose until I'm at my GW so I'm ok with it for now. I just can't wait to not have that manic, by-myself-so-who-cares time at night to binge.
Has anyone been in a similar situation? I'd really love to know how it's worked out!
[Rant/Rave] I wish my parents had told me I was fat.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Sep 4 00:51:52 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/512xv3/i_wish_my_parents_had_told_me_i_was_fat/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] LDR visit soon and I'm scared
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Sep 3 23:10:32 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/512nks/ldr_visit_soon_and_im_scared/
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[deleted]
[Help] I don't know how I'm supposed to lose weight :(
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Sep 3 22:57:41 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/512m4t/i_dont_know_how_im_supposed_to_lose_weight/
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[deleted]
[Meme/Humor] After a binge
/u/cinamintoast [5'6" | 203 | 32.76 | -67 | F]
Created: Sat Sep 3 22:55:20 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/512lvp/after_a_binge/
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pulZ3jgLM6o
[Discussion] Anyone else feel anxious about eating alone?
/u/cheeekyslug [5'6" | UGW: 114 before the end of fall quarter | 19/F]
Created: Sat Sep 3 22:43:47 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/512kj1/anyone_else_feel_anxious_about_eating_alone/
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On mobile will flair later.
If I were not so traumatized by boys I would be able to buy food without feeling bad about not being able to finish it so I can just give it to my boyfriend.
I have anxiety about eating alone whether that be socially with strangers or by myself. I also hate wasting food so I rather just starve. I also live alone and can't be around all my binge eating ex friends with fat logic so I rather just have no friends.
Oh well, when I actually feel like having a boyfriend finally I guess I'll start eating lol
[Help] Binging Tip
/u/Onthedownlowplz [177cm | 60.4kg | 19.4BMI | 9.6kg | Male]
Created: Sat Sep 3 22:07:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/512g00/binging_tip/
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Hey all.
I have issues with binging way to much and i hate it so much. I have found a useful way to helping stop it at least a little bit. I Have put a big cup of water in the fridge so that whenever I look for food I have to drink it first, not full proof after all but it has worked pretty well for me the last couple of days.
[Discussion] Is there any downside to chew and spit?
/u/runningonempty94 [5'5" | 146 | 24.6 | F]
Created: Sat Sep 3 21:10:51 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5128wu/is_there_any_downside_to_chew_and_spit/
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https://www.reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5128wu/is_there_any_downside_to_chew_and_spit/
[Rant/Rave] Feeling like a fraud
/u/salamanderqueen [5'9"| CW: 149 | SW: 180 | GW: 120 | -31 | 19F]
Created: Sat Sep 3 21:08:25 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5128l9/feeling_like_a_fraud/
---
I often feel like I don't belong in this forum. It's not anyone's fault but my own, everyone here is sosososo sweet and supportive and wonderful. But I feel like I'm not sick enough, my ED isn't bad enough, honestly like I'm too fat to be here, or to even have an eating disorder. I'm scared to post progress pics because I'm so much fatter than most everyone here.
I just feel like I'm too fat to have an eating disorder, and to hang out in ED forums :(
[Rant/Rave] Hey y'all! I'm back
/u/heartbrokenandok [5'7"-ish | 198.4 | 31-ish | -23.4 | F]
Created: Sat Sep 3 20:11:41 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/51217b/hey_yall_im_back/
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Kind of at least. I think I last talked to you all in July when I went home to visit my parents. It was not a bad trip, and I even managed to keep my usual eating habits kind of (aparently my nana used to obsessively weight her food... Did she have an ed?)
But then I did a physical job for a few weeks (part of my new job) nd while my shoes say I lost weight I can't get over how I am eating. I am binging all the time and have been totally embarrassed to come back and talk to you guys.
So here I am. 1 bottle of wine into my night, and I have to say... I missed you all. I really did. You are my support system.
Also, if I do not lose 20lbs before march of next year I am going to get charged more for health insurance. Cause even my insurance is fat shaming me.
And I'm drunk! Yay! Wine!
[Help] Does anyone else have trichotillomania?
/u/TopCat1392 [5'3.5" | FAT | GW:92.6 | F]
Created: Sat Sep 3 19:43:10 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/511xcj/does_anyone_else_have_trichotillomania/
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Not only am I a walking blimp, but on top of that I'may making myself bald. Help
[Rant/Rave] Sharing..
/u/Mattynebula
Created: Sat Sep 3 19:41:00 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/511x1u/sharing/
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I hate sharing my food with anyone. Especially my binge food, which is basically every god damn food. I will usually sneak them into my room for my stash but cant do that for the freeze ones. So I want to eat it all before anyone else can. And will get super paranoid it will all be gone in the morning.
I cant give anyone some of my food because my brain will convince me that its 'mine'. Im not going anywhere with this, just needed to get it out of my head already
[Help] Kinda scared
/u/hazelconner [5'4" | 179.6 | 34.0% BF | -10.4 | X/F]
Created: Sat Sep 3 18:34:44 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/511nqj/kinda_scared/
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So. I have often said with the way I feel about my body i would have an eating disorder if I didn't love food so much.
I kinda put the last piece of the puzzle together - how to purge. I don't do it often. 3 times a year tops for the last 3 years. But I purged twice this week. I'm on vacation and can't cope.
I'm shelling out for coolsculpting soon and I don't want to be skinny. I just don't want rolls of fat hanging off me. They feel like parasites.
I promised my friend I wouldn't purge after dinner and I flat out lied to her about it. What is wrong with me? I am a martial artist. I need strength. I know these behaviors won't help.
[Discussion] Anorexia documentary triggers.
/u/Shuckfunt-
Created: Sat Sep 3 16:55:07 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5119fp/anorexia_documentary_triggers/
---
I'm watching the HBO documentary from 2006 called Thin.
I wish I had the self control to get to that point. It makes me want to go binge.
[Help] ED maybe spinning (a little) out of control?
/u/Alexa1p [5'5'' | 110 | 18 | -10.7 | F]
Created: Sat Sep 3 15:31:03 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/510wpl/ed_maybe_spinning_a_little_out_of_control/
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When I first started restricting, it was really hard to adjust from eating whatever I wanted, to limiting my calories.
Now? It's hard to eat up to maintenance, and eating 400 calories under that is effortless. Lately I've been a bit worried about how quickly I've been dropping weight, and it's a little unnerving how easy it is to just not eat.
I still believe that when I am happy with my appearance, I'll be able to eat 1350 calories a day consistently. I'm not sure if that's a dumb belief, though.
Is there anyone at or near their goal weight who can comment?
[Goal] Jean shopping
/u/kickkkasss [5'5 | CW:134 | GW:110 | F]
Created: Sat Sep 3 15:29:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/510wen/jean_shopping/
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I usually hate shopping and trying on clothes because it usually ends in me staring at my gross body in a dressing room and crying. I especially hate jean shopping because they never fit right and I have a muffin top and its just generally awful. But today I was shopping with my little sister and I found a pair of jeans I loved but the last size left was a 2. I grabbed them and thought I'd try them on and see how gross I look in them and maybe that would motivate me to lose weight, but when I tried them on they fit!!! I've never been anywhere close to a 2 before and I shop at this store a lot and a few months ago I was a 6 so I just feel really good right now.
On mobile can't flair sorry
[Rant/Rave] I thought I wanted to recover
/u/Polarlol [6'3" | CW 176 | BMI 20.8 | -33 | M | GW 170]
Created: Sat Sep 3 15:20:05 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/510uzm/i_thought_i_wanted_to_recover/
---
I asked for help from one of my coworkers, who has suffered from eds in the past, and shes the first person that has actually tried to help me. She texts me every 3 hours to make sure I'm eating something, even if its small. And Im fucking lying to her and telling her I'm eating and not counting the calories. I feel even shittier now because someone else cares about me getting "better," but I still cant stand looking at myself because I think I look disgusting. I tried eating a normal amount of food yesterday, got to 1500 calories, and felt like garbage. If you count my workout today, I'm at -158 calories, and I dont plan on eating for the rest of the day. I thought I wanted to recover, but this is the only thing that gives me a sense of control over my life and I dont think I can let it go. Fuck.
[Other] Just to make sure neither is lying to me...
/u/gingerbiscuity [5'5 | 112 | 18.60 | F/25]
Created: Sat Sep 3 13:53:16 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/510h5q/just_to_make_sure_neither_is_lying_to_me/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/c4153dc1fba445baa48f5892c0d5936a?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=3f036d82b9f07a84f8c58c5f08ffa20a
[Discussion] Anyone else living in the Middle East? Recipe recommendations?
/u/bchuk183 [5'6 | 136 | -12lbs | F]
Created: Sat Sep 3 13:20:44 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/510bq5/anyone_else_living_in_the_middle_east_recipe/
---
I live in the Middle East and don't have access to some of the typical low-cal foods that I had in the US (no Halo Top!) and sometimes get stuck in a food rut. The main veggies are eggplant, zucchini, onions, tomato, cucumber, and potato. I can get frozen spinach but not much else. Anyone have any typical Middle Eastern dishes? The food here tends to be really fatty with a lot of oil of ghee so I tend to cook at home but it gets boring after a while. Any suggestions would be great!
Oh just another note, I can't receive packages in the mail so I can't order low-cal options online :(
[Discussion] What is your daily makeup routine?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Sep 3 12:52:49 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/510732/what_is_your_daily_makeup_routine/
---
[deleted]
[Help] Getting rid of water weight without laxatives?
/u/taeyeons-comrade [perpetual shame]
Created: Sat Sep 3 12:27:06 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5102ov/getting_rid_of_water_weight_without_laxatives/
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I always have trouble figuring out how much is water/food weight and whether my weight is accurate, especially after a binge. Should I just do a liquid fast and avoid salt or just skip one day and weight myself the next? How many days does it take from binge weight to go back down?
[Goal] Workout Routines!
/u/cardiolizard [5'7" | 120.5 | 18.9 | HW 180 -55pound and counting| F]
Created: Sat Sep 3 11:52:11 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50zwrs/workout_routines/
---
Hiya! Long time lurker first time poster, cardio-lizard here wanting to try something other than cardio!
Post your workout routines!!
Do you stick to cardio only?
do you lift?
Do you take protein?
Macros?
Do you know workouts that work for achieving a specific body type?
My calves are absolute steel, (~~7yearsofmarchingbandwhyy~~) I buy up a size or two and use a belt to appease the thunder calves. Is there a way to shrink them?
I normally stick to cardio, 2 miles in the morning 2-4 at night. 10 minute a mile pace, through the hilly appalachian. I'm unable to run during the school term.
I use the app "Zombies, Run", It's got a great story line and really encourages me to run routinely. 10/10
I love this model's physique,
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qM-NOwNxpeg
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=svuV-UMPKsc
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WyyZO_83Cpc
I also ~~lovebigbuttsandicannotlie~~ love this physique, and it would help balance out my calf muscles
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ccTtyNPNMcU
Hide restriction from boyfriend?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Sep 3 11:02:21 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50zoiy/hide_restriction_from_boyfriend/
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[deleted]
[Discussion] Mixed feelings about "you've lost weight!" comments [discussion]
/u/disbeetch [5'3'' | 140 | 24.8 | -28 | F]
Created: Sat Sep 3 11:01:33 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50zocy/mixed_feelings_about_youve_lost_weight_comments/
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As always, no flair on mobile sorry, the brackets are the best I can do
Does anyone else get kinda bummed when people comment on your weight? I'm nowhere near the point where people are worried so people are always saying it as a compliment, but it just reminds me that I used to be even more of a whale than I am now and that everybody knew it. Ugh
[Help] Not losing any weight? (On antidepressants)
/u/greenso [5'11" | CW: 145 | GW: 115 | F]
Created: Sat Sep 3 10:28:36 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50zjbt/not_losing_any_weight_on_antidepressants/
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I've been on Wellbutrin for depression since mid June, so for 2.5 months now, and I thought it was godsend. It's the only antidepressant that not only helps treat depression but also causes weight loss as a side effect. It's even prescribed to people who are overweight. My appetite is completely gone. I can genuinely go days without eating before I have to force myself to eat something so that I don't pass out on the train. It's incredible. Everyone whom I've talked to who's taken it has said that they lost like thirty pounds in two months. It's so disheartening because I've lost maybe 8 pounds altogether? I'm barely eating and yet I've been stuck at 154 for over a month. It defies logic. I feel so hopeless. I have 39 more pounds to go!!!
On one hand, I love the control of not having to impulsively eat and crave everything all day and every day (which always leads to binges.) My life in that regard finally feels right and normal. I feel in control. On the other hand, I just want to lose the weight! It just makes no actual sense. I'm not eating and I'm not losing weight. How? And it's not water weight either, I'm not bloated. I don't know what to do! I'm exhausted all the time. My hair is falling out at an alarming rated from not eating. Hell, it's not really even helping with depression. I don't know if I should stick with it for a while longer. Fuck.
[Discussion] Is anyone else triggered by negative feelings(anxiety, depression, anger, etc)?
/u/bitterorbetter [5'5| 145| 24.1 | -15 | F19]
Created: Sat Sep 3 10:22:31 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50zifd/is_anyone_else_triggered_by_negative/
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I've been noticing that every time I feel anxious, sad, angry with myself, overwhelmed by life, etc. I turn to this subreddit to cope and it calms me down a lot.
I'm not very good at restricting, I'll do really good for a week or two and then have a bad couple of days and gain it all back. I've been at a plateau for months. But I've noticed that whenever I have negative feelings, I turn to restricting and the entire ED community to make me feel better. I think it's me trying to punish myself for feeling this way or for doing whatever I did to make me feel bad in this first place. If that makes sense.
Like today, I'm feeling really anxious and overwhelmed by school. So I've been on this subreddit for two hours reading old posts and planning my food for the day. And right now I'm
Hungry and my stomach hurts because of it but I'm getting a sick satisfaction from it.
Does anyone else ever experience this?
[Other] Definitely gone over 1000 cals these past few days, so.... no thanks
/u/commtra [5'7 | GW:110 | -17,5 | F]
Created: Sat Sep 3 10:09:19 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50zgf0/definitely_gone_over_1000_cals_these_past_few/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/7eef80d962454f8aa0cbf1c23c700407?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=45b5f28a331285abd1f4ba6aacd6be34
[Discussion] Daily Food Diary! September 03, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Sat Sep 3 10:02:11 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50zfat/daily_food_diary_september_03_2016/
---
This is a daily food diary thread for September 03, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
[Help] Can someone please tell me what body type/shape I have?
/u/throwaway03199519 [5'6 | CW 114 | GW 110| 18.47| -22| F]
Created: Sat Sep 3 09:15:47 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50z88k/can_someone_please_tell_me_what_body_typeshape_i/
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https://imgur.com/a/IJz9o
I have never been sure what shape I am. I'm 5'6 and 118 pounds, and have full 34 b bust, and have been known to have a bubble butt all my life but the weight seems to be coming off of it (if any of that helps). Am I more of like a boyish body???? HELP
[Rant/Rave] Doctors keep putting words in my mouth
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Sep 3 09:10:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50z7f2/doctors_keep_putting_words_in_my_mouth/
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[deleted]
[Goal] Progress pics from no b/p for 2 weeks 5'6'' 158 lbs from 172 originally.
/u/anonymousbrahette [5'6'' | CW 154 |]
Created: Sat Sep 3 08:43:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50z3eu/progress_pics_from_no_bp_for_2_weeks_56_158_lbs/
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I am trying to recover from binge eating/bulimia. Today marks day 14 of not having done those behaviors. I am lifting weights and eating intuitively. I don't see much noticeable changes yet but I feel ok about it right now. (I am aware I am overweight and fat)
Here is the link to my photos
http://imgur.com/phSOBDT
http://imgur.com/vxCbVOU
This is my YouTube channel where I vlog my journey:
https://youtu.be/ILgzZjAK27c
The New BMI calculator that adjusts for the very short and the very tall (warning: there's a decent chance you'll go up a point or two)
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Sep 3 07:42:43 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50yung/the_new_bmi_calculator_that_adjusts_for_the_very/
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http://people.maths.ox.ac.uk/trefethen/bmi_calc.html
[Other] TIL: how much my mother fuels my ED
/u/AmAlreadyGoingToHell [H: 5"8 W: 129 GW: 110 F]
Created: Sat Sep 3 07:31:18 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50yt4v/til_how_much_my_mother_fuels_my_ed/
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She just keeps making these little comments about how I should loose more weight. I'm BMI 20 right now, healthy, normal (though I hate that, skinny I'm coming for you) but it hurts. A whole fucking lot.
[Intro] My introduction ♡
/u/Mimikyui [5'5 | CW 121lbs | BMI 20 | WL: 35lbs| Female]
Created: Sat Sep 3 07:09:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50yqb1/my_introduction/
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Hi all! I've been lurking this sub for forever and at this point decided to make an account so I can actually interact with all you lovely people. So, I suppose this is my intro?
I've had an ED for about 6 years in total and recovered once during only to relapse. My stats are undesirable for me currently, 21/F, 5'5, 121lbs (55.2kg) bmi 20. My current goal weight is 100lbs. I'm looking forward to getting to talk with you all through your struggles and triumph's and hope I can offer support to anyone who needs it. I've read so many relatable stories on here, I've laughed with you all, cried with you all and cheered you on from the sidelines, but now I'm ready to join in.
So my diet plan has for the last while been based on soft foods, such as Yoghurt, soft cheese, low cal ice cream and teas/diet beverages. This has been a diet that has helped me in the past, however I would like a bit of insight as to others thought's? My reasoning for the soft foods and liquids are they tend to not bloat me as much, I bloat horribly easily and its quite uncomfortable and off putting to my diet. A typical day goes as follows:
BREAKFAST Low fat Yoghurt: 62 kcals Multivitamin.
LUNCH Low cal ice cream stick: 66 kcals
DINNER Cheese triangle: 45 kcals
During which I am sipping on plain teas, diet drinks and water. I intent to do light exercise throughout. I'm about 3 weeks into eating like this, I have a cut off point of 200 kcals a day. Would it be better to try randomise the number of calories each day/have fast days? I'm not worried about hunger pangs etc, so I'm not necessarily looking for any alternative foods to curb hunger, I'm just trying to make the most out of my diet.
Thank you all and it's lovely to get to finally speak to you ~ ♡
[Help] [Question] about salt water flush. Can do I have to dissolve the salt?
/u/_pizzagirl [5'5 | 125.2lbs | gw:110 | -29.4 | f]
Created: Sat Sep 3 06:53:30 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50yocr/question_about_salt_water_flush_can_do_i_have_to/
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Like is it safe and effective if I drink .5L, swallow 2tsp salt, and drink the second .5L? Drinking it all mixed is so upsetting. On mobile so no flare.
Edit. Tried and it make me vomit a lot of it, so not sure if it's going to go very well.
[Help] Some advice on my diet??
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Sep 3 06:43:43 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50yn9a/some_advice_on_my_diet/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] Need to vent.. Relapsing ED and I don't even care anymore..
/u/AmIbeingbad
Created: Sat Sep 3 06:23:07 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50yl0h/need_to_vent_relapsing_ed_and_i_dont_even_care/
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I don't really know who else to talk about this, so I'm putting a post here. Hope you guys don't mind me venting here... Quite a lot of text coming up.
**Backstory:**
I suffered from an ED when I was around 18-22, I lost around half my body weight (went from around 220-120 at 5'8) and had incredibly messed up eating patterns. I wouldn't eat for days at a time, then binge eat, feel guilty and go back to starving myself.
Since then, I met a nice man (or so I thought), got married, started to recover and am now up to over 240lb. I am not attractive anymore. I've missed the younger version of me - being so slim and tiny and fragile. I never feel fragile anymore, I feel like a walking elephant.
As I grew in size and in comfort in life, my husband became incredibly unattracted to me. He loved dating and being with the thin version of me. He didn't care how fucked up my eating patterns are, that I would faint randomly and be unable to leave the house because I was too weak. It's at the point where we hardly talk or spend time together, we don't have sex at all. In response I ate to feel better, and my problem got worse and worse. My husband got abusive, treating me horribly, calling me names constantly, yelling at me for stupid and inconsequential things like dropping a tissue, refusing to go out with me because he was embarrassed to be seen with me. This is all compounded by me moving overseas to a 3rd world african country for him (for his work) where going out alone and having a social life is basically impossible. I have only him, and he doesn't want to see me.
**Now:**
I met a guy online. Or re-met I suppose - he knew me as the thin girl, not this fat one I am now. I've always cherished the vows I made to my husband and wanted to see them through no matter what. I'm not the sort of girl who cheats. I've stayed in this horrible situation and marriage for years without even thinking about leaving. But.. this guy is making it hard.
From the get go he pursued me aggressively. He told me how much he wanted me, all the things he wanted to do to me, how beautiful and sexy I am. And my heart started fluttering again, I started to feel like maybe there was something worth living for other than staying in a tiny apartment in a disgusting town with a husband who refuses to see me. Apparently he had been e-stalking me (for lack of better word) for over a year, and it was by chance I messaged him a few weeks ago looking for help and he decided it was go time.
And the ED... He only knows me as a fragile, beautiful girl. He knows the waif of me, and I want to become that girl again. While I've tried to lose weight in the past, hating my body but not hating it enough to motivate me to lose the weight. But, now, with the thought of him I haven't eaten in a week. The weight is dropping off so quickly and I'm back to loving the feeling of a heavy head, the dizzy spells when I stand up or sit down too quickly. All that drive I had lost so slowly and pathethically over the past years in this marriage has come back with gusto, and all it took was something finally telling me that I was worth something more than what my husband sees me as. I can't bring myself to eat, because I feel like every thing I consume will be pushing this guy away from me. I want to start saving the tiny amount of money my husband gives me, and buy a plane ticket back home to go see him, but I can't until I get back down to nothing..
But, fuck, I'm also married. Getting a divorce isn't as easy as walking away. I made a commitment, we have a dog and a life and plans for children together here. And while I know my husband resents me (he's told me so many times that if he could go back he would never have been with me, that he regrets it and wishes we weren't together), I don't know what to do. I don't want to stay in this relationship any more, but I feel like going back into my ED will kill me. I feel like I can't stop though, I feel like I'm about to start spiraling back down into the depths again, like nothing will get me back out again. I'm in such a messed up place emotionally and mentally and there's nothing here for me to cling to. I have nothing in my life to bring me comfort.
What do I do? Do I leave my husband and potentially spiral back down into my eating disorder? Do I stay and be unhappy for life? I don't know what to do anymore. I need a hug.
[Discussion] 'Stupid Questions' Saturday! September 03, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Sat Sep 3 06:02:31 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50yiyt/stupid_questions_saturday_september_03_2016/
---
This is the weekly 'Stupid Questions' Saturday thread for September 03, 2016.
Use this thread as an opportunity to ask any questions you might have that you feel don't necessarily warrant their own post.
Please be wary of false advice and information. Be sure to research the facts before taking anyone's advice, no matter who they are. Remember that diagnosing members is unacceptable. **Anyone looking for medical guidance should seek the opinion of a medically licensed professional.**
*****
Have any questions or concerns? Comment below, or [PM the mods.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FproED)
Request: How to not mess up everything when going out to eat
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Sep 3 05:22:47 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50yf2k/request_how_to_not_mess_up_everything_when_going/
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[deleted]
[Thinspo] Saturday Thinspo: Skinny and fit
/u/dbishop22
Created: Sat Sep 3 04:09:34 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50y8cv/saturday_thinspo_skinny_and_fit/
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https://imgur.com/a/NPU48
[Thinspo] Per a request: Male Thinspo (I'm so sorry if these are common images!)
/u/dbishop22
Created: Sat Sep 3 04:03:10 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50y7ud/per_a_request_male_thinspo_im_so_sorry_if_these/
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https://imgur.com/a/0oCA7
[Discussion] People are worried - advice?
/u/RockinWeasel
Created: Sat Sep 3 00:50:28 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50xq9h/people_are_worried_advice/
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Ok, so for the last year or so I've been dieting and then life got super stressful and eating became too much of a chore. So I stopped doing it and live on as little as possible which is mostly salad and water most days.
An added bonus is that weight just fell off. So many people told me how great I look and I love how my collar bones and hips now poke out so much. I am currently in a healthy bmi range, I started off obese.
People are now starting to worry. My friends, my boss, etc. I have so much energy and am doing well. How can I assure them that I am ok? I normally have 300- 600 calories on an average day, 900-1100 on a "fat" day. I dont like to eat crisps, chocolate, anything fried or sweet. I am lactose intolerant. I don't want anyone to worry and I just want to assure them I am ok. Any gestures I can make to demonstrate this okness or tips? I feel sick if I try to eat more.
Fiber One Cereal
/u/musemusings [5'9"/129.6 lbs./18.79/28.4 lbs lost/]
Created: Sat Sep 3 00:46:32 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50xpwb/fiber_one_cereal/
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Heated up. That is all.
[Tip] High protein, low calorie
/u/skinnylove73 [5'10 | 125 | 17.49 | -15 | F]
Created: Sat Sep 3 00:32:36 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50xoj1/high_protein_low_calorie/
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Hey Lovelies!
Something new I recently discovered is using bariatric specific food! It is intended for people who have just gone through a weight loss surgery (such as the band) and can only have small amounts. they are filling and have low calories with lots of nutrients and are high in protein and fiber! I buy them on amazon along with bariatric vitamins!
[Thinspo] Inspired by the recent fall thinspo post + bc I'm looking forward to fall + winter, here's some of my faves for you lovelies!
/u/screamingfalcon [5'7.5"/171.45cm | CW: 2fat4me | GW: 121 | UGW: 108 | F22]
Created: Sat Sep 3 00:28:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50xo3q/inspired_by_the_recent_fall_thinspo_post_bc_im/
---
http://imgur.com/a/xGPoH
[Help] Binging out of control
/u/Saltycook [5'4"| 127# |21.8| -36# | Female]
Created: Fri Sep 2 23:37:35 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50xioy/binging_out_of_control/
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So I've been trying to maintain between 120-128 lately but I can't stop eating at home. Usually I purge after a big intake but lately it's been a challenge to do so, and I'm left feeling shitty after horrible binges and tipping the scales at 130. What do I do to stop?!? I've also been spotting so it might just be that time, though with an iud it shouldn't happen
[Rant/Rave] Emotional support is not until Thursday, but...
/u/PBhatesme [5'4"| 144 | 24.7 | -52| F]
Created: Fri Sep 2 21:28:02 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50x3f4/emotional_support_is_not_until_thursday_but/
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so I just started back up at school. (I think I'm one of the older members here. I'll be 36 next month). Being surrounded by early to mid- twenty somethings who were all super skinny (well not all, but enough) made me feel terrible about myself.
I just broke my 47 hour fast with wine. That's how pathetic I am. I hate eating, but will totally consume 500 calories of wine.
I'll be fasting for another 30, or so hours, starting at midnight. I hate myself. Sigh.
[Help] Losing control and need help...
/u/36bulletking63
Created: Fri Sep 2 21:21:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50x2mz/losing_control_and_need_help/
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Im sure some of you have got to where i am now, ive spent the last week or so not restricting enougj and binging uncontrollably almost every day.
For anyone with experience, how did you regain control. How did you get back to restricting effectively
[Rant/Rave] I cried today because my mom ate my binge food.
/u/allquiets [5'1.5 | 138 | 26.68 | -6 | 85 | GNC]
Created: Fri Sep 2 21:19:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50x2db/i_cried_today_because_my_mom_ate_my_binge_food/
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It's a whole bunch of things, actually. Clickbait title! But... yeah. I came home and cried today for the first time in months. I binged on pie today at work, and then had an anxiety attack at Wal-Mart because my mom didn't let me control anything we bought for food and I don't have the money to buy all my own meals. I ended up not buying my binge food because my anxiety-attack-brain-fog, and figured we had some at home. Nope, mom ate ramen. Brain went full meltdown mode, and I went up to my room, without saying anything even while they yelled at me, and started to sob.
I'm losing my goddamn mind. I hate this. I hate this. I don't know how to process even the smallest grievances.
I didn't even want to binge that much.
[Help] Bulimia getting worse???
/u/thirdocean
Created: Fri Sep 2 20:45:35 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50wxzg/bulimia_getting_worse/
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On mobile so I can't flair :(
I used to only throw up one in a while and then I got stressed and it became everyday. Now it's every meal healthy or not. Even ifs a salad. Sometimes I'll throw up just stomach acid and end up dry heaving. I'm still gaining weight. I'm so upset over it lately. I just don't know what to do. I thought I was getting better but I just wanna be skinny
[Discussion] ED and Alcoholic together?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Sep 2 19:47:25 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50wpvg/ed_and_alcoholic_together/
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[deleted]
[Discussion] Other than your ED, what are you obsessing over lately? Does it affect your ED?
/u/gastastic [5'1 | 122 | 26F]
Created: Fri Sep 2 15:43:32 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50vobt/other_than_your_ed_what_are_you_obsessing_over/
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I've found that my obsessive-compulsive behaviors come and go in waves. When one gets better, the other gets worse, and sometimes when one gets worse, they all get worse.
I have PTSD and self injurious behaviors, excluding my ED. So anything related to eating, or injuring, THAT I'm familiar with. But lately I've been obsessing over my boyfriend's relationship with his children's mother and their dysfunctional relationship. To the point that I have to think about not thinking about it.
She is a manipulator and still tries to control him, even his personal life. And she abuses his kindness and generosity. In turn, my obsession with that has made the ED worse (better?) More effective. I want her to see me and hate me because I'm so small. She's already bigger than I am, but I what to keep getting tinier.
I absolutely hate that she has consumed my thoughts the way that she does. If they had a healthy relationship and didn't mistreat my boyfriend, my obsession would never even have gotten to be an obsession at all.
[Intro] Hi, here is my Intro
/u/Little_peachgirl
Created: Fri Sep 2 14:16:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50v98d/hi_here_is_my_intro/
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Hi, just discovered this subreddit,
I LOVE THE SUPPORT AND MOTIVATION!
So really not sure what to say, I am really not that interesting. I’m
29/F, I’m 5’6 and 123lbs. I would describe myself has just a very
average person. I’ve never been overweight but would never say thin,
just average. I always wished to over hear a person describe me as “oh
the thin girl” but don’t think that’s been the case.
For as long as I can remember I have had obsessive thoughts, like my
brain just gets stuck on something. I’ve purged and restricted off and
on since high school, it got really bad year and half ago. I don’t
binge, but something I know during the meal I will and have extra. My
boyfriend found out and was very concerned, he took it on himself to
take care of my health. He thinks he “fix” me.
It’s lonely, I wish I had a friend that understood. All my friends are
marry, kids, busy lives. I feel so immature compared to them that this
is what I think about all day. But I really don’t want to change. I
look around and see how fat people let themselves get and wonder if
it’s that fast. It really scares me, I work so hard to just be
average.
Kik- little_peachgirl
[Discussion] Unrealistic expectations for food?
/u/c_marier [5'6"| 112 | 18.1 | -13 | 22F]
Created: Fri Sep 2 12:45:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50usu5/unrealistic_expectations_for_food/
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Anyone else have this? I'll be restricting all morning so 1pm or 2pm comes along and I've only had coffee and I've mentally been planning and looking forward to my meal for hours and when I finally eat it... I'm so disappointed when it doesn't taste like heaven on earth. Sometimes it is enough that I don't eat it, so I guess that's good, but it's like: this is the one meal I'm allowing myself so I want it to be worth it dammit!
[Help] Go from bulky leg muscle to lean legs?
/u/funnygreensquares
Created: Fri Sep 2 12:34:53 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50uqqi/go_from_bulky_leg_muscle_to_lean_legs/
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I've always had bulky leg muscle. It's kind of a thing that's common in karate and gymnastics. Maybe from using high weight (body weight) and low reps every time we squat or tumble? I don't know. But I really want lean leg muscle. Is it even possible to go from one kind to the other or is this a body type you're genetically disposed to - like hourglass and apples. Is this just how my body decides muscles are made??
[Discussion] Friday night plans!
/u/thin_is_in [5'8 | 115lbs | 17.3 | -35lbs | F]
Created: Fri Sep 2 11:33:00 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50uf1d/friday_night_plans/
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Anyone doing anything fun? Having eaten 250cals today, I'm gonna have a bath with a bottle of wine (600cal). If no-one hears from me again, I've drowned from too much alcohol :p
So people with an actual social life, what you up to tonight?
[Rant/Rave] I just ate an entire slice of pizza in less than 2 minutes in the bathroom
/u/birdpeck [5'8" | 107 | 16.09 | F]
Created: Fri Sep 2 11:12:03 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50ub3j/i_just_ate_an_entire_slice_of_pizza_in_less_than/
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I feel so gross, I was supposed to throw that away and now I've messed up my week and ugh I hate myself
[Thinspo] Don't give up on yourself!
/u/Noroeste [5'6 | can fit in a rowboat | F]
Created: Fri Sep 2 10:41:33 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50u5i4/dont_give_up_on_yourself/
---
http://i.imgur.com/NdtRfoN.jpg
[Discussion] Info on AN diagnosis
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Sep 2 10:27:25 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50u2tz/info_on_an_diagnosis/
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[deleted]
[Intro] ~Introduction~
/u/krebsunicycle [5'7" | 110lbs | 17.17 | F]
Created: Fri Sep 2 10:04:10 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50tyjn/introduction/
---
Hello all! I've lurked on this subreddit before, but this summer I had taken my mind off of my weight for a while. It felt nice, but then I went through a break up. And I tried on a small pair of bathing suit bottoms.
Staring at myself in the mirror in horror, I realized the band of the bottoms was squeezing the fat around my hips. **SO I'M BACK.** Hoping to get back down to 106 lbs. I really like how supportive everyone is here. [Hi new friends :)](http://i.imgur.com/DCUdWLA.gif)
[Discussion] Daily Food Diary! September 02, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Fri Sep 2 10:02:34 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50ty88/daily_food_diary_september_02_2016/
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This is a daily food diary thread for September 02, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
[Rant/Rave] food has had no appeal recently
/u/ikillsouls [5' 2" | 105 | 19.2 | -21 lb | f]
Created: Fri Sep 2 09:57:50 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50txdp/food_has_had_no_appeal_recently/
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I've had a shit summer. Been binging non-stop, and gained five pounds. last week i decided to get back on track... it lasted a weekend. On Monday I went to the state fair with my sibling, and holy shit did i stuff my fat face. i ate:
Ice cream
garlic chicken
Tater tots
Fried alligator (it was disgusting, yet i ate about 3 bites)
half of a hot dog
non-diet soda (which i hadnt had in about a year, it was glorious)
and fries
Needless to say, I felt like shit while eating and later that night. When I woke up on tuesday, I didn't feel hungry, at all. i ate about 500 calories on tuesday because I still felt awful from the night before. I fasted all day on wednesday and it felt so much easier than it ever has. yesterday I only had about 600 calories because Everything i cooked looked so unappealing and even as I ate I felt like I was forcing it down, and it didn't even taste as good as it used to. It was like eating seasoned rubber or something. I'm not sure if it was the monday binge that made me feel like this, but it feels really good. I really hope this continues because I don't want to keep fucking up.
[Rant/Rave] My boyfriend's dad asked me how much I weigh at dinner
/u/thindreaming [5'8.5 | 155 | -15 | 23F]
Created: Fri Sep 2 09:49:24 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50tvvw/my_boyfriends_dad_asked_me_how_much_i_weigh_at/
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I went to dinner last night with my boyfriend, his dad + girlfriend, and his sister + boyfriend. I'm really good friends with his sister and her boyfriend, but I was meeting his dad and dad's gf for the first time.
At some point, we were talking about this gym I just joined and how intense it was (Orange Theory) and that somehow led my bf's dad to ask, "so, how much does a girl like you weigh?"
I felt instantly nauseous, so I just casually replied, "150". Which he misheard me for 115 and it made me want to die inside having to clarify, "no, 150". He asked my bf's sister and she just went "nuh uh, nope." and went back to eating. (She's also way tinier than me).
The whole experience was so weird and I know that it's not my fault because honestly who asks that at dinner (especially a pastaria). I can't stop replaying his question over and over in my head. A girl like me?! What does that even mean?
So today I woke up feeling sick to my stomach with embarrassment and I'm torn because for one of the first times ever I am so motivated so just restrict all day, but I have the most important job interview ever this afternoon over lunch.
Fuck.
[Tip] Gordon Ramsay's Broccoli Soup Recipe - under 100 calories. I like to add a laughing cow cheese wedge to it too.
/u/HowToBeAsian25 [5'3.5 |113lbs |19.78 |-19 | F]
Created: Fri Sep 2 09:00:44 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50tn66/gordon_ramsays_broccoli_soup_recipe_under_100/
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https://recipes.sparkpeople.com/recipe-detail.asp?recipe=1781322
[Discussion] Does any other female over the age of 25 think their ED has anything to do with wanting to be that hot young teen girl?
/u/supersizetrainwreck [5'9 | CW 125lb | 18.13 | F]
Created: Fri Sep 2 08:37:03 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50tj04/does_any_other_female_over_the_age_of_25_think/
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So I know that my ED is so much more than that, and most of it has to do with having control at a time when everything else in life is going bonkers. But I've been wondering what it is about being small that drew me to it in the first place and I think it might have to do with always wanting to be that hot young girl that everybody wanted. I was never less than 180lb in high school at 5'9 and was lucky if guys wanted to be my friend let alone be with me. I watch shows like Stranger Things, Gossip Girl, One Tree Hill and can't help but remind myself that these girls that I think of as thinspo are supposed to be at least 8 years younger than me and yet I go to them rather than older women who are skinny as motivation.
[Discussion] Boob loss?
/u/venetianrosequartz [5'6"|CW 140|HW 153|LW 130|GW 135|UGW 112|WL -13| BMI 22.6|Female]
Created: Fri Sep 2 07:35:44 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50t8vk/boob_loss/
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I'm seconding the weekly "stupid questions " thread because I really don't think this warrants its own post, but my question is this. Is there a way I can prevent going down cup sizes when I'm losing fat? Should I do pec exercises? I don't mind gaining muscle, I just hate being so chubby. My girlfriend says she really likes my breasts though so I don't want to lose them. I'm eating 1000 cal a day and exercising by walking (-200 cal) currently. Thanks!
Edit: I should probably add my cup size. I'm a 30F
[Help] tell me what to get st the grocery store
/u/thelonelykitten_
Created: Fri Sep 2 07:11:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50t4z8/tell_me_what_to_get_st_the_grocery_store/
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Going grocery shopping later today and I'm not sure what to get! I definitely want to get lots of veggies and fruits but what snack stuff should I get? I'm gonna try to get halo top if they have lemon cake or mint chip cause I haven't tried those two!
[Rant/Rave] I thought I wanted to recover, but I'm not sure now.
/u/kpatable [5'9" | 124.6 | 18.1/18.4 | -22.4 | F]
Created: Fri Sep 2 07:08:30 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50t4ge/i_thought_i_wanted_to_recover_but_im_not_sure_now/
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Like, I want to recover from BED, obviously. But I don't want to recover from "disordered" eating I guess. Whenever my ED therapist suggests anything, I *know* I'm not going to do it. I don't want to do it. I don't want to try intuitive eating. I don't want to stop weighing myself. I don't want to stop counting calories. I don't want to stop losing weight (or, Arceus forbid, *gain* weight). And like, I apparently need to do those things if I'm going to recover... Am I just kidding myself? I feel like I'm waiting for my therapist to convince me that I need to change, but she has not done so. At all. *I* don't see why I should change, either. And I just can't imagine myself *ever* being able to not slowly gain weight without counting calories and being strict/controlled about what I eat. Because, for my entire life, I've either been fat or gaining weight while "intuitively" eating, or I've been skinny while being strict about what I eat. I know I'm supposed to have faith that I'll get there, but the risk of taking that chance seems too high right now.
[Help] Alcohol on empty stomach?
/u/SkeeverTail
Created: Fri Sep 2 06:29:29 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50sysh/alcohol_on_empty_stomach/
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Hey guys, I've been lurking here for a while and love how supportive you guys are of each other.
I've been fasting for the past 3-4 days and my friend is coming over to visit tonight. We normally end up having a few drinks when we hang-out and idk what to do.
I know it'd be smart to eat something, but I'm worried about triggering a binge.
Have any of you guys found your selves in a situation? I'd love some advice just now.
[Thinspo] Friday Thinspo: Going out for the weekend
/u/dbishop22
Created: Fri Sep 2 06:22:44 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50sxvi/friday_thinspo_going_out_for_the_weekend/
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https://imgur.com/a/aXuqb
[Help] What supplements should I be taking? Also a thank you to you all.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Sep 2 06:22:36 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50sxuz/what_supplements_should_i_be_taking_also_a_thank/
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[deleted]
[Discussion] Weekly Selfie, Progress Pic and OOTD Thread! September 02, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Fri Sep 2 06:03:34 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50svdy/weekly_selfie_progress_pic_and_ootd_thread/
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This is the weekly picture thread for September 02, 2016.
Feel free to share your selfies, progress pics or outfit-of-the-day (OOTD) pics in this thread!
**Rules**
1. Be nice, **or you will be banned.**
2. Please use [imgur](http://imgur.com/) as a host.
Consider adding commentary on featured brands, sizing, inspiration behind your OOTD (trying to look thin or cover up weightloss, etc.)!
**Remember that anyone can view the contents of this thread even if they are banned from this subreddit. If you receive unwanted messages, please contact the mods with a screenshot of the relevant messages. Note that even if we ban people, they can still message you, and they still have access to the contents of this subreddit. The best thing for you to do is to block them.**
*****
^Selfie, ^progress ^pic ^and ^OOTD ^threads ^are ^posted ^every ^Friday.
^Have ^any ^questions ^or ^concerns? ^Comment ^below, ^or [^PM ^the ^mods.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FproED)
[Discussion] Who do you quietly compete with?
/u/verakitty [5'4"|CW 108lbs |18.5 |-12lbs |GW 105 |UGW 99 |F]
Created: Fri Sep 2 04:12:49 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50sitl/who_do_you_quietly_compete_with/
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Confession corner. Details make the story!
I look up to my older cousin, who is a beautiful, clever, loving woman. She's got wide eyes, makes unabashed commentary, and has modest, effortless style: denim, off-the-shoulder sundresses, mustard yellow mod shifts, and cool athleisure. She told me about her own struggles with an ED, and I secretly try to emulate her restraint when I see her taking less food, or offering others her share. It's not so much rivalry, as admiration!
I have a secret, casually tracked caloric record of intake between my brat of a little brother and myself. I breezed past my first 24 hours of water-only restriction, my first bona fide fast in ages. He ordered and inhaled a greasy sausage pizza except for one slice, two powdered sugar-coated chocolate lava cakes, and most of an order of chicken nugget abominations from Dominoes. Delivery. This was his food for the day, after peevishly refusing lovingly homemade duck pho for brunch that my father had cooked. (I'm vegetarian.) He slept and played video games all day, like he does every other day.
Last, and hidden least, I eat small portions or blatantly slip away from the dining table when my sorry excuse of a mother screeches at me for the thousandth time to eat meat, lest I "get sick" or "drop dead".
Inspired by another user's post!
[Meme/Humor] MRW the nurse asks me if I'm "on some sort of crazy diet" b/c of my ketone levels
/u/sunrisesomeday [5'6.5" | 141lb | UGW:105lb | yo-yo queen]
Created: Fri Sep 2 00:51:53 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50rz0j/mrw_the_nurse_asks_me_if_im_on_some_sort_of_crazy/
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https://giphy.com/gifs/youngertv-tv-land-younger-hilary-duff-26AHvB9CWQ1YzHY1W
[Meme/Humor] MRW my friend says "I don't mind if birth control makes me gain a few pounds"
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Sep 1 23:57:50 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50rsru/mrw_my_friend_says_i_dont_mind_if_birth_control/
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http://giphy.com/gifs/bigbrotherafterdark-big-brother-after-dark-bbad-l0HlI6NdcrtkV5C7e
[Goal] A small [Goal]
/u/frailandbedazzled1 [5'11" | CW 140 | GW 125 | 18.90 | WL -35 | F]
Created: Thu Sep 1 22:57:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50rl96/a_small_goal/
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Due to my very wide hips and giant butt, I have always been a bit pear-shaped. Therefore, where I would get small sizes in shirts, jackets, etc., I would always have to get larger bottoms in swimsuits, underwear... You get the picture.
I recently went clothes shopping because I had an interview today and needed to get some slacks (the ones I had are now way too big for me, yay!) and finally, FINALLY I was able to fit into and purchase some pull-on slacks (don't judge, they're comfortable) that were a size small! The store I got them from is one that I've been loyal to for many years (my old slacks actually came from that very store,) and as far as I can tell, they don't do vanity sizing.
And then to calm my nerves after the interview, I ate a pint of blue bell ice cream. Lol. 🙃
[Discussion] What do yall think of this quote?
/u/noodleworld [5'6" | CW 113.9 GW 110 | BMI 18.5 | F]
Created: Thu Sep 1 22:43:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50rjdp/what_do_yall_think_of_this_quote/
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“A culture fixated on female thinness is not an obsession about female beauty, but an obsession about female obedience. Dieting is the most potent political sedative in women’s history; a quietly mad population is a tractable one.”
— Naomi Wolf, The Beauty Myth
I don't exactly know how to feel about it; but now that I'm somewhat solidly post-ED and have energy again it's pretty resonant
[Help] No Binge No Purge, but strep?
/u/OtterKat [5'5" | 115lbs | 19 | -5lbs | F]
Created: Thu Sep 1 21:56:50 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50rd91/no_binge_no_purge_but_strep/
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So Im starting a no binge- no purge month that I kicked off last night with a 24 hour fast. So far doing good, but one of my housemates has strep and I accidently drank from his cup. I took 1000mg of Vit.C yesterday and today and will continue, I just wanted to know if you guys had any tips for immune boosting?
Thank you ♡♡
[Help] I can't get past the shakes
/u/tresliz
Created: Thu Sep 1 21:40:43 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50raz9/i_cant_get_past_the_shakes/
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I've tried to fast before and I desperately want to start again, but it hasn't been easy, and I'm not talking about "man I'm hungry" I'm talking about shaking uncontrollably, sweating, nauseous, and if I get some food in me I feel normal again.
Is there ANY way to get past that shaky nauseous feeling after having no food that day? I need help here. Fasting is so addicting. I feel so powerful. I want that again.
The worst of times.
/u/dsprngact [4'10 | 119 | 26.6|-34| female]
Created: Thu Sep 1 21:05:36 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50r5y9/the_worst_of_times/
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My mom died a month and 2 days ago.
Before she died...I was doing really well. Eating mostly veggies and I hadn't purged in a while. No binges either, and almost daily compliments on how much weight I had lost.
I've gained 10 pounds since she died. I saw 130 on the scale this morning. I feel like with each pound I gain....a part of me slips away. I never wanted to be this fat again. I'm obese. I can't stop eating and I have no control over food....and I can't seem to get myself back on track. I need help. I need to fast. I can't gain anymore weight.
I'm so overwhelmed.
[Other] What do you see when you look in the mirror?
/u/HowToBeAsian25 [5'3.5 |113lbs |19.78 |-19 | F]
Created: Thu Sep 1 20:28:21 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50r0f3/what_do_you_see_when_you_look_in_the_mirror/
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Flair as "other" please
Losing actual fat vs water weight
/u/behindthearmory
Created: Thu Sep 1 20:15:15 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50qygi/losing_actual_fat_vs_water_weight/
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So I bought one of those scales that are supposed to tell you your body fat percentage, for the first week it was pretty steady.
I've fasted all week (less than 250 calories every day, usually like 170, though I might have a 700 cal meal in just a little). Scale is down 10lbs but: my clothes don't fit any differently my bones aren't protruding any more than usual and my body fat on the scale went up 4%.
I'm freaking out because I feel like I'll never be able to lose the weight. I know the numerical weight is down but it feels like water weight and not actual fat. How do I lose actual fat?
Boyfriend wants me to be honest with doctor
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Sep 1 19:29:19 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50qrii/boyfriend_wants_me_to_be_honest_with_doctor/
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[deleted]
[Discussion] Can we have a weekly "stupid questions" thread. I feel like my post never warrant a whole one (fitbit question)
/u/TopCat1392 [5'3.5" | FAT | GW:92.6 | F]
Created: Thu Sep 1 19:26:24 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50qr1y/can_we_have_a_weekly_stupid_questions_thread_i/
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Other than design, what if any, are the major differences between the charge hr, charge 2, and surge? My flex is acting up so I'm probably going to return it as it is still under 45 days of me having one... not sure what to get instead. Didn't think I needed hr function but I'm very worried that my calorie burn is inaccurate even with activity level set above my actual. Don't want to post in r/fit bit because I'd have to make a throwaway. Thanks in advance!
[Rant/Rave] Today is my birthday
/u/pineapplesandham [5'3 | 95 lbs | 17.29 | -10 lbs | F]
Created: Thu Sep 1 19:18:32 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50qptc/today_is_my_birthday/
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I told - no, stressed - to my dad that I didn't want a cake. He was like, sure, I won't buy one. But I knew he would, and he did. Mango mousse - my favorite. He knows it's my favorite.
When I confronted him about it he looked so happy, so oblivious. He said, "you're eighteen now, it's a special day!" Big smile and all. I love my dad so much, and if I didn't have this stupid eating disorder I'd have hugged him and said thank you a million, billion times over. I'd have smiled too, because he just looked so happy. It's my birthday, after all! I'm eighteen now! It's a cause for celebration!
Instead, I went upstairs and cried, and that's where I am now. I cried because I thought of how unhealthy that cake was. All those empty, stupid, useless calories, piling on my body, rendering it shapeless and ugly. I've been eating so much recently, I'm such a pig. I don't want to lose this body I've worked so hard for; not for a piece of fucking cake.
But goddamn, do I sometimes wish I could go back to the days when I could eat cake without me crying about it.
[Discussion] Waist sizes
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Sep 1 19:11:05 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50qon7/waist_sizes/
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Can someone explain to me how waist sizes work? I would have thought that the size of your waist is half genetics, because people have different proportions (hourglass, etc.) and half weight.
I really want a small waist, but mine is rather big considering I have a normal BMI (23). My waist is 31 inches which, when I go clothes shopping, seems to be equivalent to a size 12?? I'm normally a size 6.
I would really like a 24-25 inch waist. My goals are weight-based, but having a small waist would be really nice.
How have you noticed your waist change with weight loss and gain?
[Discussion] I only lost one pound this month, but at least I did not gain any weight.
/u/shimmergolightly [5'6" | 120.6 | 19.47 | F]
Created: Thu Sep 1 19:07:47 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50qo59/i_only_lost_one_pound_this_month_but_at_least_i/
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I'm proud for not gaining anything, honestly. Usually it's so easy for that to happen to me...
[Help] Guesstimate A Fairground Hot Dog?
/u/stealthmode_activate [5'1 | Moo | Ugh | -43 | F]
Created: Thu Sep 1 18:43:01 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50qk8f/guesstimate_a_fairground_hot_dog/
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Okay I'm panicking a bit as it draws closer. Family picnic next Saturday. I will be expected to consume one fairground hot dog (bun, all-beef wiener I think? I can calculate ketchup and mustard). I have zero frame of reference for this type of shit, I don't go to fairs, I don't eat fair food, I don't even know the general *size* of a fairground hot dog. My brain is insisting I will be forcing myself to consume eleventy-million calories and will subsequently gain a hundred pounds partway through eating. I know it is irrational, but my brain will not shut up until I have consensus on an adequate estimate.
Does anybody have any idea what the damage of a fairground hot dog is?!
[Rant/Rave] What's happening to me!! ugh!!
/u/citrus_cunt [5' 9"| 139lbs | 19.5| +2lbs | F]
Created: Thu Sep 1 18:40:49 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50qjx9/whats_happening_to_me_ugh/
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I've gained 10 fucking pounds this summer!! Since getting back to school I've been working out nonstop and p much fasting until dinner and I *still* keep gaining??!?!
Maybe it's bc of my mineral deficiency, or maybe I need to eat more small meals rather than one big dinner each day?? I dunno man my body is switching up the way it deals with things again and i cant catch up. Wish me luck guys.
Alrighty then...
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Sep 1 18:19:05 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50qght/alrighty_then/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] fuuuuuuuuuuuck
/u/goddamnroommate [5'6" | 143.8 | 23.30 | -50ish | F]
Created: Thu Sep 1 17:23:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50q7g0/fuuuuuuuuuuuck/
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So I typically get venti iced green tea from starbucks when it's after 5pm. I don't do well with caffeine and sleeping otherwise. I *just* checked the calorie count on that. I had assumed that when I got it unsweetened it was the whole 0-10 calories that I count for my tea. WELL APPARENTLY it's 120 calories for the venti. I mean, guys i've been doing this for months! that's a non-negligible amount of calories!! ugh. I hate when i mess up stuff like that
[Rant/Rave] Good news towards the end of a bad week
/u/Yet_Living [5'7 | SW 66.8kg CW 59kg GW 50ish| 20.14 | M]
Created: Thu Sep 1 17:03:56 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50q472/good_news_towards_the_end_of_a_bad_week/
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This week hasn't been the best. School is back, and I had been heavily restricting in preparation, only to mess it up the night before. I really outdid myself. I don't count calories, but judging by how much I ate, I've probably beaten my record. So I felt disgusting the next day in school, and the next, and on the third day I purged for the first time in a while. I didn't cut though, which I usually do when I purge, so that's nice. I felt a bit better today, and when I was about to get into the shower I noticed something. My ribs. In the mirror I could clearly see my ribs. Two on each side. I hadn't been able to see them before. I still have a belly and fat and everything but it's nice to see an actual difference. I'm overjoyed. I just wanted to share :)
[Discussion] What do you do when you eat nothing, exercise to nearly passing out, and still don't feel accomplished enough for the day?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Sep 1 16:36:47 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50pzgm/what_do_you_do_when_you_eat_nothing_exercise_to/
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[deleted]
[Help] Probiotics
/u/zomboooo [5'7|115|18.1|-2|NB]
Created: Thu Sep 1 16:35:38 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50pz9u/probiotics/
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Does anyone take them? My doctor recommended I start them in order to speed up my digestive system. Love that IBS life. Any experiences with them?
[Discussion] Where do you buy leggings for being cozy?
/u/Glitter_Cunt [5'6" | 88 | 14.2 | -27 | F]
Created: Thu Sep 1 16:28:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50py1y/where_do_you_buy_leggings_for_being_cozy/
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Hey everyone :) So winter is coming!
I'm too small for pretty much all my leggings right now. I'd like a few pairs to wear with oversized sweaters and boots or occasionally with shorter tops or jackets. I'd be using them for lounging and occasionally light yoga or hiking--no serious exercise so I don't need like lululemon or Athleta (which I'm pretty sure are too big).
Ideally they'd be opaque, won't instantly pill, and will maybe be high waisted? Maybe a little warm too? Ideally I want a few pairs of something cheap (like under $20).
Does anyone have suggestions? I'd like to just buy something on Amazon, but I'm worried about things being too big (for anyone on mobile I'm 5'6" and bouncing between 88 and 90lbs).
Thanks!!
[Help] Scared to go home after weight loss
/u/throwawaytodayokc
Created: Thu Sep 1 15:58:10 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50psta/scared_to_go_home_after_weight_loss/
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I have struggled a long time with eating disorder issues and I am terrified to go home this weekend. It has been almost a year and I am thinner...I don't want anyone to say anything. I cant lie or layer because we are preparing for a wedding and it might show. But...but part of me thinks, "Okay, I will objectively see if I am thinner."
I cant think of anything I can say to make it less of a deal, but I plan to say I have been stressed about work but am getting back on track. Advice? Words of wisdom? Tough love? I am just feeling a lot of anxiety and want to feel less alone...thank you for reading my rant.
[Goal] 17 more pounds until my goal weight
/u/hoofofpig
Created: Thu Sep 1 15:28:28 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50pnon/17_more_pounds_until_my_goal_weight/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/ecf728dd9a75479c89d1c790a913f690?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=8e9aeca3d31395f4b894576b5ec912f4
This is the most successful "binge" I've had...
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Sep 1 15:17:06 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50plp7/this_is_the_most_successful_binge_ive_had/
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[deleted]
I'm disgusting. Disgusting disgusting DISGUSTING
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Sep 1 15:16:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50plmm/im_disgusting_disgusting_disgusting_disgusting/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/66f2790a47e24d09a4e1cfff70cedbab?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=3ce5e92d658b0b6722d451cabc8d7a1c
[Thinspo] 105 pounds end of July > 96 pounds end of August (partiallygypsyy.tumblr.com)
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Sep 1 14:54:47 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50phs0/105_pounds_end_of_july_96_pounds_end_of_august/
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https://68.media.tumblr.com/0ac8d5000118a207dabfe729f1b448c6/tumblr_ocso99xWkD1ve65hdo1_1280.png
[Rant/Rave] Wasting time - mini rant
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Sep 1 14:52:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50phgl/wasting_time_mini_rant/
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[deleted]
[Other] maybe i shouldnt have gone to class,,,
/u/citrus_cunt [5' 9"| 139lbs | 19.5| +2lbs | F]
Created: Thu Sep 1 14:48:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50pgkw/maybe_i_shouldnt_have_gone_to_class/
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i'm sitting in my sociology class and we're talking about variables in social theory and the prof is using hunger and hunger triggers as examples..... aughhh i was doing so well today and now i cant stop focusing on food
[Rant/Rave] I'm an asshole who has secret competitions with my friends.
/u/Missy_Is_Bitter [5'3"| 183.4.0 | -32lbs | F]
Created: Thu Sep 1 14:34:48 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50pe3n/im_an_asshole_who_has_secret_competitions_with_my/
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On mobile so no flair right now. I'm sorry.
I'm seriously always competing with friends and family and coworkers for who can eat less, and I feel like such an asshole about it.
I have a friend visiting from out of state this weekend and she's much smaller than I am, and my goal is to eat about a fraction of what she does. Last night we all made cheese fries and I filled my plate way less than what she took, ate a few, and then gave most of the rest of the plate to my fiancé and told everyone I was full already because I had eaten at work (a complete lie because Wednesday's are a fast/super low restriction day). Today we went to In n out and she and our other friend both got cheeseburgers and fries and a drink, and I said that I wasn't hungry yet and didn't get anything. Im not gonna eat anything until dinner tonight, if I eat at all today.
I do this shit all the time though. Im constant watching other people's eating habits and setting situational rules for myself depending on who I'm with. Always start eating after other people have already started. Don't take another bite until everyone else has had one or two bites. Drink way more water, and only have water or diet soda or something 0calories. Be finished before everyone else with food still on my plate. Never ever ask for food. Never be the one to suggest getting something to eat. Always try to decline food when it's offered.
Im such a cunt.
[Rant/Rave] just crying over not having any doritos
/u/crapbeg
Created: Thu Sep 1 14:19:33 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50pbbe/just_crying_over_not_having_any_doritos/
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i asked my parents specifically for two binge foods: doritos and ice cream. i've had strep throat for the last week and i've basically been on liquids and all i wanted was to eat some ice cream and they came back with:
- no ice cream
- no doritos
they got another random brand of chips instead.
i've just nearly got into an argument with a close friend over something, a bunch of my friends are out tonight and i can't go because i'm still sick and i'm now crying over this stupid shit. yes i know that i wouldn't want to binge anyway etc. etc. but i was so looking forward to this. just feel awful right now.
i hate how self centred and ungrateful EDs make you.
[Other] When I'm having a hard time I like to write. Hope you guys don't mind me posting it here.
/u/GiveMeASmosh [5''2' | 101.2lb | 18.5 | -13lb | f]
Created: Thu Sep 1 13:50:25 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50p5yl/when_im_having_a_hard_time_i_like_to_write_hope/
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She consumed books at an alarming rate, poised on the edges of tables and chairs or in the corner of the armchair, her legs tucked up under her with her chin propped up on her thumb and her pointer finger in front of her whispering lips as if shushing the entire world. She would read like this for hours, the expression on her face moving from amazement through to anger and back again. She ate every word. She turned every page as if discovering a new treasure on the other side. I loved her like this, and every other way as well, I loved her. And although she mirrored those words back to me with all the expressions you'd expect, and everything seemed alright, I knew I could never have all of her. I could never compete with the authors and their great oceans of words with warmth and charm and rain. I was okay with that.
She was the most amazing person id ever met, and in fact will ever meet. That anyone will meet, and I don't say that because I fell in love with her and she in her chaotic world sort of loved me back. She was like a gliding entity in this world, tiptoeing around trying to avoid every bit of attention while absorbed in her books and papers and accidentally procuring the attention of everyone around her. When I first met her, I could imagine her shrouded in white sheets arguing with Death about the existence of the afterlife. "I can't possibly go." She'd say in that voice like turning papers. "I haven't learned everything yet" and Death exasperated would hand her his sickle and say "Fine. Everything is fine." And everything was fine.
And everything was fine. She had this way of settling the ocean of churning words and floating thoughts around her. She never had to say a word, her smile was enough to make you feel utterly alone in her company and always left you wanting more. She was always shifting through a spectrum of defining features, never quite settling into the grooves of one single thing. Constantly asking for another taste or another chance. Mistakes were her speciality and her talent, as was bending her words in a tragic attempt at making things right. I was ok with that, we had a understanding that never required discussion. She knew what I knew and I was fine with the way her world bent.
After all, she was good at making things bent. Especially people. She was deviously innocent in her ability to make people dance and never felt a prick of guilt. People wanted to be her toy because being her toy was enough to make the world feel special. I was her toy, just like the others. Always bobbing along on her strings while she buried her mind in her tomes and whispered her words into her finger in perfect awareness of my torment. Everything was important to her but no one thing deserved more attention than another. That was part of our understanding, I knew my part in her world was another rung on some ladder she'd created to reach... Whatever she was always searching for. Restless.
She's gone now, I'll never see her again. I won't sit with her in that chair and hold her head in my lap as she reads, oblivious of how much I wished I could reach into that place she disappears into and touch her moving lips. I won't watch her hands as they work their magic turning each individual ingredient into some cohesive creation in her little kitchen. I won't secretly admire her paintings, or listen to her breathing beside me when I can't sleep. I won't hold her hair back for her and steady her shudders by running a hand down her back while she forces herself to lose that little amount of weight which leaves her anchored in our world.
Why do I remember the bones of her back pressed against my hand, or the sharp edge of her hip against mine while she leaned against me on that train. I remember how tired she looked. I remember the way she gradually stopped reading in public and stopped taking the stairs because she couldn't beg her body for the energy. Suddenly she wasn't in control anymore, she wasn't bending the rest of the world. Her body was bending her. I remember waking from a dream where I did see her shrouded in white, but she didn't even lift her head when Death asked for her hand. She always looked so disappointed when I cried. Not because I was crying but because she knew I was crying for her. I should have done more. But I didn't. And now she's gone.
[Rant/Rave] I don't even know what to say..
/u/082616 [5' 6.5"/128/20.36/F]
Created: Thu Sep 1 13:28:21 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50p1l6/i_dont_even_know_what_to_say/
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I messed up. I had been doing well since last Friday, and then slowly upping my calories (even though I don't count.. yet..) and yesterday, ugh.... there was a voice in my head, the one we all know.. "you've been doing so well (actually, not really, you are not losing or gaining any weight or exercising) so how about tomorrow you have a little b/p session.. you go to the store, get some ice cream and maybe a little pizza, and purge it." And that's exactly what I did. I purged two separate times. The last one though, fuck, my body just isn't use to this much food at once (duh?!) and I couldn't finish the other small pizza or the last bit from before. I don't know. Two separate times I took a break in the bathroom and just stood there with both hands on the sink, just like, I can't do this anymore. My body won't let me. My mind won't let me. I've hit a brick wall. I've decided to throw away the rest of the binge food I got (which is just the ice cream..) and start new.
That's my rant/vent. Here comes the questions..
1. If this were to happen again, should I drink water or soda or carbonated flavor water? Soda I feel helps more but probably also damages me more.. And should I drink a lot or a little bit of water? I try to sip in between the foods and sometimes bites, but I don't know what to do, like the ratio I guess?
2. Should I take a few minutes from purging and then try again or when I take a few seconds and my body doesn't want to anymore, is that it? I tried two more times to do it after doing it for a few minutes and it just would not come up. I'm confused.
I will not let this ruin my day, week, or month. I will tried my hardest to not do it again. I'm 90% sure the last time I purged was the last day of July. I was a month free. Then yesterday, that voice... ugh!!! I'm moving on though. I'm moving on. Fuck this.
Update: well.. Didn't expect that to happen, haha, I just fucking binged again. Wow. Time to throw up. I am so fucking lonely. I need to get out the house after this. I need to not think about ice cream or anything sweet. Did I even decide to binge again or was it my ED? Or am I my ED? Today could have gone well. It's the first day of the month. I'm just numb.
[Meme/Humor] Binging on Stuff You Don't Even Like
/u/deanhipchester [5' | 115.2 lbs | 23.69 | -27.4 lbs | F]
Created: Thu Sep 1 13:28:00 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50p1iq/binging_on_stuff_you_dont_even_like/
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https://i.imgflip.com/10jg4r.jpg?a
[Thinspo] My new Thinspo/Motivation wall display
/u/whatupmyknitta [5'2'' | 169.8lbs | 31 | -5lbs| female]
Created: Thu Sep 1 12:59:16 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50ow4j/my_new_thinspomotivation_wall_display/
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http://imgur.com/a/OgWze
[Other] Thanks for the support earlier this week! (mini-update)
/u/whatupmyknitta [5'2'' | 169.8lbs | 31 | -5lbs| female]
Created: Thu Sep 1 12:47:06 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50otrl/thanks_for_the_support_earlier_this_week/
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Earlier this week I had reached a point where I was really disappointed with myself and felt ready to take back my life! (https://www.reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50c3pm/missing_my_ed_feels_like_i_lost_a_friend/)
I just wanted to thank you lovelies for the support and give a tiny update on my progress moving forward! I've cleaned up a significant amount of my room, taken down the picture collage of my ex and I that was on my wall & replaced it with a thinspo/motivation display, I've been exercising and taking care of my hygiene, hydrating like a mo'fo, and just feeling better and more motivated than I have in months!!! I know it's only barely scratching the surface and mostly water weight anyway, but i've also already lost 5lbs <3
I'll let you guys know how things are again next week! (posting here always helps keep me focused!!)
xoxox
[Other] My wide hips are going to be the death of me.
/u/outox [6' | 121.4 lbs | 15.80 | Male]
Created: Thu Sep 1 12:30:42 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50oqjc/my_wide_hips_are_going_to_be_the_death_of_me/
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http://imgur.com/a/PPFKJ
[Tip] A message for anyone who, like myself, feels frustrated with their progress (or a seeming lack thereof). Also, happy September 1st!
/u/Noroeste [5'6 | can fit in a rowboat | F]
Created: Thu Sep 1 11:15:20 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50obkz/a_message_for_anyone_who_like_myself_feels/
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http://i.imgur.com/VEW4u5d.jpg
[Thinspo] Ari Song Thursday thinspo
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Sep 1 10:33:20 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50o3d8/ari_song_thursday_thinspo/
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http://i.imgur.com/vIELD06.gifv
[Discussion] September Goals!
/u/woollyshirt [172cm | 54.3kg | 18.19 | -33.7kg | NB/M]
Created: Thu Sep 1 10:18:59 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50o0kf/september_goals/
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Did you set a goal to achieve by September? Have you set a goal to achieve by the end of September? Share it here!
I made a summer goals post [here](https://www.reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4s54wc/summer_goals/) where some of us set goals for september but you're more than welcome to comment now if you weren't part of that discussion :)
[Goal] Today is the first time I've felt okay about showing my back. ⭐️🌝
/u/BerenicesTeeth [5'10" | 125 | 17.49 | F | message me ur good kpop music]
Created: Thu Sep 1 10:03:24 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50nxjw/today_is_the_first_time_ive_felt_okay_about/
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http://i.imgur.com/mEk7J4u.jpg
[Discussion] Daily Food Diary! September 01, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Thu Sep 1 10:02:24 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50nxcp/daily_food_diary_september_01_2016/
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This is a daily food diary thread for September 01, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
[Rant/Rave] Today is going better, but I have a confession that's making me feel pretty fucking shitty..
/u/mckenziemudkip [5'2 | CW:109(-21) GW:88 | BMI 20.45| F/20]
Created: Thu Sep 1 09:43:20 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50ntpc/today_is_going_better_but_i_have_a_confession/
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EDIT: Thank you everyone for the tips to keep from scarring. I don't think it will leave more than discoloration if anything, especially if I use some bio oil.
I'm sorry I'm not replying to you all individually. I've felt really emotionally overwhelmed all day, and can't find words for everyone, I guess. But I really appreciate it so much. I don't have anyone to talk to IRL. I feel like people will think I'm faking it, or looking for attention. It's embarrassing for me and hard for other people to understand why I would do something like that over 7lbs. Hell, it's hard for ME to understand why I'd do that over 7lbs.
Thank you everyone for taking the time out of your day to try and make sure I don't do this again, and that I know I'm worth not hurting myself.
I really love all of you internet strangers more than you know.
********
So.. I have no idea who else to tell this. I feel like you guys are the only ones who will understand.
I had a horrible last few days. Lots of binges, lots of frustration. Tuesday night I was so fucking done. I just cried in the dark on my kitchen floor, pinching all my fat and just feeling over all like shit.
I was so frustrated. I went to the bathroom, opened all my pill bottles. Chickened out, but in my moment of sanity I poored peroxide over all of them and dumped it in the toilet to make sure I didn't change my mind again. I was still freaking out though.. I pulled apart a shaving razor and honestly, I have no idea what came over me, but I carved "fat bitch" into my leg..
I feel stupid. I feel melodramatic. I wish I could take it back. But in the moment it just.. happened. I've never done anything like this before so I have no idea where it came from.
I'm so afraid my boyfriend and family will see it before it heals.
Or let alone if it scars... then forever it will be there. God forbid I have to explain that to my kids and still expect them to love themselves.
Ugh, I'm losing my mind..
Sorry guys. I just needed to get it out because I feel like such an idiot..
[Help] Zero to low calorie foods question
/u/HowToBeAsian25 [5'3.5 |113lbs |19.78 |-19 | F]
Created: Thu Sep 1 09:34:15 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50ns0m/zero_to_low_calorie_foods_question/
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Some pickles have zero calories, right? So if I ate a whole jar of pickles, I would be good?
Do you guys ever do that? Is there anything zero or low cal that you don't feel guilty eating in mass quantities?
I'm currently in the process of shrinking my tummy, so I'm not trying to eat a whole jar of pickles, but even when I do eat them, I try to only have a couple, and I started to wonder, it wouldn't really be a big deal if I had more...
[Other] Saw these. Had to try. They are perfect.
/u/WeighingDown [5'2" | 108 | 20.46 | F]
Created: Thu Sep 1 09:26:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50nqm4/saw_these_had_to_try_they_are_perfect/
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http://imgur.com/a/5MQ1r
[Intro] i didn't need something to have. i needed something to be.
/u/strawberryemoji
Created: Thu Sep 1 09:13:47 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50no47/i_didnt_need_something_to_have_i_needed_something/
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I'm not sure if this actually counts as thinspo but I recently read an autobiography about a former ED who says this. my biggest vice other than binging is compulsive shopping...not to where i'm in debt but i suppose it's just an extension of my personality.
anyways, i'm new here and honestly had no idea there was a community who would accept me for not wanting to get better yet. before this week, i've basically been in the stage of getting my advice from warning brochures and health campaigns. at this point in my life, i'm so overwhelmed with classes and work and research commitments that my ed isn't something i have the energy to manage...instead, it's something i KNOW i can excel at.
PS: will assign flair once i figure out how on mobile
[Discussion] "You have a diagnosis of Anorexia Nervosa, did they talk to you about that?"
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Sep 1 09:08:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50nn81/you_have_a_diagnosis_of_anorexia_nervosa_did_they/
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[deleted]
[Discussion] What are your weighing habits?
/u/yummmies [5'4" | 125 | -40 | F]
Created: Thu Sep 1 09:03:53 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50nmaj/what_are_your_weighing_habits/
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More questions from me! I enjoy hearing from you guys :)
How do you guys weigh your self? Naked? With pajamas? Once a day? Once a month? In the mornings? Evenings? Any strange positions? Any handstands?
I tend to weigh myself every day, in the mornings, naked, after I use the bathroom. Sometimes I'll play around, lift something heavy, then see if my weight changes after I put it down. Too bad my scale ends up showing immediate gain after that and I freak out. I do have a really bad habit of weighing myself at night, particularly after I eat and drink and haven't used the bathroom. Sometimes I would weigh myself after shower, with the wet towel still wrapped around my hair, and of course I freak out and then I'd rip off my towel and weigh again in relief. I really like the fact that I know my weight is gonna be lighter in the morning.
[Goal] I will not Binge or Purge for the entire month of September.
/u/StoicallySpeaking [5'8" | 149.8 | 22.8 | -31 | M]
Created: Thu Sep 1 08:35:55 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50nh25/i_will_not_binge_or_purge_for_the_entire_month_of/
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Hey guys,
Been having a rough time lately. I have been b/p nearly every day, and it's so frustrating. I'm losing progress, and it's making me miserable. I want to be free of this vice before university, because it's destroying my life, and I just don't have time for this bullshit anymore. I just need a fresh start. I need to get rid of this shit from my life once and for all.
Today is the perfect time to begin. Anyone else with me?
[Help] Could really use some advice on how to handle this situation
/u/turtle4president [5'2" | 106.2 | 20.12 | F/20]
Created: Thu Sep 1 08:26:17 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50nfdc/could_really_use_some_advice_on_how_to_handle/
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(Mobile, please flair as help)
Some backstory:
Two of my best friends, B and N, came to visit me a couple weeks ago. I've been really close friends with B for about 8 years and N has my best friend, my ride or die, my other half for ~4 years. Last year, I introduced B and N to each other and they started dating. They were together about 8 months and recently broke up. B is really heartbroken but N decided it was best to cut contact completely.
N is maybe an inch shorter than me and maybe 85-90lbs, really tiny girl. She takes a variety of meds (anti-depressants, anxiety meds, Vyvanse) and when she came to visit me she was barely eating. When we were in high school a few years ago, she was still tiny (maybe 95-100lbs) and she was a bottomless pit. She could eat so much and never gain! She's also sedentary. B has a very lean, tall, slim body, has always been concerned with her figure but she is very active.
Here's the problem:
When B and N came to visit me, I noticed they didn't eat much. I knew B had an eating disorder in the past, but N? She lost a significant amount of weight since the last time I saw her and I was genuinely surprised how little she ate.
Since N asked B to stop talking to her, B is texting me asking me to check up on N because N has been having trouble eating. I don't know how to approach it, because 1) I have an eating disorder, 2) I think the meds are apart of her lack of appetite, and 3) how the hell do I tAlk to her? She never came to me directly with this issue... It would honestly make me feel bad to hear her say stuff like, "I'm just never hungry", "I keep losing weight", "I can't gain weight"
I'm sorry if this sounds selfish. I love N to death and of course I want her to be healthy and happy. On the other hand, it's frustrating... N has a therapist, psychiatrist, meds, friends, family who are all there for her at her every beckoning call... But now she's barely eating and I don't have the answers. I'm always here to listen, talk, try to help but I don't know what will make her hungry... TBH this whole situation makes me want to starve the rest of the week.
What can I do? I need to be a good friend to her and I don't know how to this time.
[Help] I want to lower my caloric intake, but I'm not sure if I should. Any suggestions?
/u/kpatable [5'9" | 124.6 | 18.1/18.4 | -22.4 | F]
Created: Thu Sep 1 08:25:37 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50nf9d/i_want_to_lower_my_caloric_intake_but_im_not_sure/
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**TL;DR:** I'm thinking of reducing my caloric intake goal from 1600 to 1200 to better counteract my overeating. But, since I have BED, would this just make things worse?
So I posted here about my four day streak - the next day I had ~2500 calories -__- This happens often enough to where, if my TDEE is what I think it is - 1700 - then I can't afford to eat ~1600 most days because I'll just end up gaining slowly. And that I am NOT going to let that happen. Now that I have a good eating schedule going and I'm better at resisting the urge to binge, I'm thinking of reducing my caloric intake to offset these high calorie days. I'm thinking of reducing it by 50-100 calories per meal, so my total would be 1200-1400. Do you think this would be a good idea? Now that I'm in therapy and understanding better how BED works, I'm afraid reducing my caloric intake will just make it worse. But like, for the past 2 weeks I've been overeating by 400-900 calories 2-4 times a week, and so, if I'm only creating a deficit of 400-800 per week, I will gain. I can't gain. I'm at a nice weight. I don't want to fucking ruin that. So yeah. What do you think I should do?
[Intro] Going to my nutrition class while fasting is one of my favorite things
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Sep 1 08:20:41 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50nefd/going_to_my_nutrition_class_while_fasting_is_one/
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[deleted]
[Help] I feel like I need to change my diet, but Idk how. Suggestions?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Sep 1 08:11:31 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50ncw4/i_feel_like_i_need_to_change_my_diet_but_idk_how/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] Rant venting I'm gaining instead of loosing
/u/thinkthinlythrowaway
Created: Thu Sep 1 07:48:13 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50n917/rant_venting_im_gaining_instead_of_loosing/
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I'm back at school and somehow managed to gain 3 pounds instead of losing any. This is with only like 1 meal a day although I usually end up binging and I live with family and boyfriend so it's not like I can avoid dinner. UNLESS you guys have any tips for that. Most of the times I'll cook dinner so I can kind of control but then my boyfriend bring snacks and I lose it.
And to top it off I ran the side of my car across a barrier because I wasn't paying attention like an idiot.
Basically everything sucks.
[Rant/Rave] I'm sad and i dont deserve to eat.
/u/thelonelykitten_
Created: Thu Sep 1 07:26:35 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50n5kz/im_sad_and_i_dont_deserve_to_eat/
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I'll never be good enough for anybody no matter how hard I try. I wish I could be one of those girls that liked themselves and was confident enough to not have an anxiety attack in the bathroom everyday at work.
I have no control over anything in my life except for what I (don't) eat.
[Tip] Take yr supplements people!! Don't be like me!
/u/citrus_cunt [5' 9"| 139lbs | 19.5| +2lbs | F]
Created: Thu Sep 1 06:43:17 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50myyb/take_yr_supplements_people_dont_be_like_me/
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I stopped refilling all my individual vitamins because I'm cheap and thought that "Oh it's fine I didn't really need all 6 of them, I'm *healthy*".
Well bucko, after 2 debilitataing leg cramps i had to admit I was wrong. I'm used to leg cramps sure, but this was SO BAD. It went up my entire leg and I was crying!! It's been almost 12 hours and it's still tender. If I'm not careful it starts to seize up again...
Don't be like me beautiful redditors. Take care of yrselfs. ✌
[Rant/Rave] Fucking Ber months.
/u/lightfeathers [5'4" | CW 114 | GW 95 | F]
Created: Thu Sep 1 06:37:16 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50my4x/fucking_ber_months/
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It's the ber months again. I have 3 months to lose as much as I can before I'm forced to look pretty and thin in front of cameras. I HATE pictures. I hate seeing myself look fat and huge and disgusting. I need a workout and meal plan, stat. It's time to get my shit together. No more excuses.
Good luck, guys. I know you can do it. ❤
[Other] First selfie I've taken at all in months. I hate having my photo taken.
/u/celestulle [173cm | 53.6kg | 17.7 | -8.3kg | F]
Created: Thu Sep 1 06:25:25 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50mwgq/first_selfie_ive_taken_at_all_in_months_i_hate/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/cb57eeaba70e4b04b6ec3928d9719471?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=845df196026ac045aa998bc375c504b3
[Discussion] Weekly Emotional Support September 01, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Thu Sep 1 06:03:03 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50mtiz/weekly_emotional_support_september_01_2016/
---
We're almost all dealing with quite stressful things outside of our eating disorders. Whether it be complicated relationships, friends, university, work or other mental illnesses like depression, anxiety or OCD, we all seem to be having a rougher time emotionally and mentally than the general population.
Use this thread to post about your problems or ask for advice concerning things other than EDs/ED behaviors.
**As always, follow the sub rules when reading or posting.**
*****
^Weekly ^emotional ^well-being ^and ^support ^threads ^are ^posted ^every ^Thursday.
^Have ^any ^questions ^or ^concerns? ^Comment ^below, ^or [^PM ^the ^mods.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FproED)
[Thinspo] Thursday Thinspo: Fall thin and pretty
/u/dbishop22
Created: Thu Sep 1 05:41:41 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50mqwb/thursday_thinspo_fall_thin_and_pretty/
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https://imgur.com/gallery/3stoB
[Tip] found this in the shops, 67 cal for a 250g portion!
/u/headfirstintospace [5'4'' | FAT AF | Binging is shite | 21 / F]
Created: Thu Sep 1 00:29:20 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50lva5/found_this_in_the_shops_67_cal_for_a_250g_portion/
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http://i.imgur.com/i8eMcwx.jpg
[Help] Binging prevention?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Aug 31 23:56:50 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50lrwl/binging_prevention/
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[deleted]
[Other] We Are Strange
/u/verakitty [5'4"|CW 108lbs |18.5 |-12lbs |GW 105 |UGW 99 |F]
Created: Wed Aug 31 23:54:36 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50lrnf/we_are_strange/
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https://youtu.be/j0Mz_IqpZX8
[Rant/Rave] I'm losing all of my progress.
/u/Dionysus_Rex [5'11" | CW: 135lbs (-80) | BMI: 18.23 | Male]
Created: Wed Aug 31 22:21:33 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50lgil/im_losing_all_of_my_progress/
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Long time (medium amount of time?) lurker here, coming out of the shadows.
I'm freaking out. I've made such great progress, but I can feel myself regressing. I wouldn't say I felt *good* about myself, but I could see the light at the end of the tunnel.
Now, I can feel myself slipping back into my old routines and I hate it, but I feel like I can't stop it. I've actually **GAINED** ten pounds, so my flair is a lie. I do weigh 135lbs, but I weighed 125lbs at my best, so forgive my lie of omission.
I don't know what happened. I was doing so well, I came back to college this semester and now it seems like food dominates my mind. It's all I ever think about. How much I'm eating, how much I'm not eating, when was the last time I ate, when should I eat next, etc.
This week started okay, I fasted Monday, but Tuesday hit and I couldn't stop myself from eating WAY more than I should have. I think I might have made up for it by fasting today.
I don't understand how the people around me do it. It's so hard to keep your goals on a college campus, or maybe that's just an excuse. It seems like everyone around me is eating more/exercising less and still skinnier than me. It's driving me crazy. I've been trying to find something filling/low cal/cheap, but combined with the fact that I don't know dick about cooking, or even have a place to cook anything elaborate, it seems impossible. The student meal plans are a fucking nightmare. It's a disaster.
Jesus, look at this novel I've written. I don't know whether to flair it "Help" or "Rant" at this point.
I'd like to thank you all for this great community though, I don't know if I'd have been brave enough to post this without reading these posts over the months.
[Help] Help! I think my roommates are getting suspicious
/u/Liebeistfuralle
Created: Wed Aug 31 21:25:45 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50l8f2/help_i_think_my_roommates_are_getting_suspicious/
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I live in a college dorm with three other girls. We're all in one fairly small room with a mini fridge and microwave, so it's kind of easy to tell who's been eating what. We're also right across from the cafeteria.
We've only been here a couple weeks, but I think my roommates are picking up on my eating habits. Ive been restricting to 500 cal, for reference. They keep offering to go to the cafeteria with me and always repeat their offers ("are you sure? ""But you haven't eaten anything, "etc).
How do I hide the fact that I'm restricting from them? Do I just make sure to eat when they're around? I'm lucky that my school has a really low cal vegan option for breakfast, lunch, and dinner, and salad for other meals. But my mom got me a lot of junk food and it's just kinda sitting there. Do I eat some of that to convince them?
Sorry if this is hard to follow I'm panicking a little rn. Also on mobile so not sure how to flair
[Discussion] What are your personal experiences and/or opinons on juice cleanses/fasts, a la 'Fat, Sick & Nearly Dead'?
/u/whenwestartedthis
Created: Wed Aug 31 21:18:55 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50l7fh/what_are_your_personal_experiences_andor_opinons/
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I've fasted plenty of times on water, tea, straight black coffee.. haven't tried a juice fast yet, but I've drank this kind of juice and I do enjoy it.
What are your experiences/opinions on these juice cleanses/fasts? I was thinking of doing like 80% veggie juices and adding the tiniest bit of fruit to save me from eating so much sugar.
[Discussion] Have any of you tried the diary/logging app "Casual Dieting Weight Manager"?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Aug 31 20:55:13 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50l3zo/have_any_of_you_tried_the_diarylogging_app_casual/
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I've just downloaded it and wanted to know if you guys had any opinions it. It's really cute looking and I think it might be affiliated with the chat app "Line"?
[Discussion] reactions from exes after getting scary thin?
/u/behindthearmory
Created: Wed Aug 31 20:53:55 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50l3t2/reactions_from_exes_after_getting_scary_thin/
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anyone have experience with this? recommend/don't recommend?
[Help] Binge Question? [Maybe TMI?]
/u/lovemyfragilebones [5'2" | 99 | 18.11/18.76 | -11 | gq 19]
Created: Wed Aug 31 20:28:26 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50kzty/binge_question_maybe_tmi/
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So I binged today, and i don't think I've ever binged quite like this before (it wasn't a massive binge by binge standards, but it kinda was for me). For various reasons I can't/didn't purge, I just went to sleep for a few hours. I woke up and now my lower gut hurts a lot. I don't know if I'm now really constipated or???
My stomach often hurts because who knows why, but rarely if ever in quite this way. I think it's pain on the vagus nerve because it's going further up and also causing nausea.
Idk, I've had similar pain before, I think due to bad indigestion, and it just hurt for a long time and then stopped and I felt sore and really weak.
I'm sorry if this is a stupid question. I hate stomach pain of any kind, and it feels like everything in here hurts. I'm worried this is gonna last all night. Please help
Edit: typo
[Rant/Rave] Restricting again. Exercised off more than I ate today. Can't tell anyone but you fellow fallen angels.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Aug 31 20:04:13 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50kw1m/restricting_again_exercised_off_more_than_i_ate/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] I tried to fight it.
/u/KillingKylie [5'5| Piggy|-25|F|GW: 97]
Created: Wed Aug 31 19:40:25 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50ks81/i_tried_to_fight_it/
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Due to threats from my therapist of having to go to outpatient, I tried to fight my need to obsessively exercise and restrict over the past week.
This is hell. I cannot do this; I feel disgusting and full of shame. I am allowing myself to go down the rabbit hole and likely never come back from it. Fuck everyone, fuck everything, I refuse to live like a bloated cow.
[Rant/Rave] I really miss treatment
/u/runningonempty94 [5'5" | 146 | 24.6 | F]
Created: Wed Aug 31 19:37:02 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50krn3/i_really_miss_treatment/
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I spent about 3 months (~Jan-March of this year) in treatment (never residential, just day program) and I'd never felt so supported and safe in my life. Believe me, it was really hard and destroyed me at times, but overall the experience was incredibly positive. I left because insurance cut me off, not because I was ready.
And I made it a bit being ok, but I've since graduated so I live in a new city with a new job and most of my friends are gone and I just desperately feel like i need that again. Like I need someone to NOTICE me and care about me and be concerned about me and constantly ask me how i'm feeling and engage with me when i'm being crazy and irrational. (The main thing I learned in treatment -- I use my eating disorder as a tool to get people to demonstrate they care about me, because I don't believe it otherwise.)
And that's definitely like 2/3 of the reason I've started restricting again (the other 1/3 being that I've gained a lot of weight...). I really really want to go back to treatment. Which I know is stupid because it's expensive and will jeopardize my job, but I really just need someone to ask me how I'm feeling and treat me with kid gloves and let me talk about my eating disorder all the time without it being too much.
I don't know why I'm posting this. It's not like I'm intentionally trying to stop or trying to continue.
[Help] Just started college, ED spiraling out of control. Need support.
/u/gazdaman1 [6'0" 18y/old | 153lb | 20.8 | -30lb | M]
Created: Wed Aug 31 19:28:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50kqb3/just_started_college_ed_spiraling_out_of_control/
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I've been in college for the past three weeks. Orientation week was awesome; combine lack of time to eat proper meals + walking over 20K steps per day, I was losing weight like nobody's business. I was able see a noticeable change in body composition and my once snugly fitting clothes were starting to feel a little loose. Now that classes are in session, I have quite a bit of free time on my hands, and I've started to get acquainted with campus (including all of the places to eat). Now, for background, as far as meal plans, I have 10 meals a week. I can eat 5 of those meals wherever I choose, but the other five, I have to go to their cafeteria. The cafeteria is a buffet of sorts. They have healthy options, but as one would expect on a college campus, most of it is shitty, sugary, fattening food.
I've always had a problem at buffet style restaurants because if I see trigger foods in front of me, healthy or not, I'll eat it. Every time I go into the cafeteria, I tell myself I'll only get healthy foods like salad, veggies, and grilled chicken, but the urge for ice cream, or doughnuts, or the assorted desserts always creeps up. I'll then convince myself I'll allow myself *just a couple* bites of dessert using the twisted sort of logic my brain likes to torture me with, because I deserve it, because I did well on a test, because I walked 15k steps today. And without fail, I'll go straight for the sweets section. But like many, once I take a bite of a trigger food, I can't stop myself, and I go on a full on hour long dessert binge.
So, I've been alternating between ~800kcal days and massive ~4000kcal binge days for the past two weeks, and while I've been maintaining, it's both physically and mentally exhausting. I can't focus on my classes because I'm beating myself up for being a fatass, and I wake up exhausted because of how much I ate the night before. I can't talk to anyone because I'm afraid my script for my ADD medication is going to be pulled, something that I desperately **need** in order to even remotely function inside an academic environment. My sense of control is starting to slip away and everyday is worse than the last. It's getting to the point where I'm considering purging, just to bring back a fucked up sense of control over my body.
I'm in my dorm room, stomach nearly bursting, on the verge of a panic attack. I need help, but I don't know where to turn. I want these thoughts to go away. I want my brain to stop obsessing about food. I want to feel a sense of normalcy again.
Slow but consistent weight gain is sending me crazy
/u/yemeyenkiz [5"6' | 125 lbs | BM I 20.83 | +25lbs |Female]
Created: Wed Aug 31 19:28:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50kq7p/slow_but_consistent_weight_gain_is_sending_me/
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[removed]
[Thinspo] Weird reverse thinspo: Tim Allen grunts every time Guy Fiere backwards eats
/u/mermaid_puppy [5'11" | 137lb | UGW 115 | F]
Created: Wed Aug 31 19:21:26 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50kp4u/weird_reverse_thinspo_tim_allen_grunts_every_time/
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http://youtu.be/x195_WMlaTI
[Discussion] ASMR instead of eating
/u/Kidfromelpaso [65in | 140lbs | 23.57 | 5lbs | F]
Created: Wed Aug 31 17:36:47 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50k8jh/asmr_instead_of_eating/
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Has anyone here heard of ASMR?! I've been a regular listener/watcher for years and it helps me relax so much and has seriously taken away food cravings especially before bed. Puts me right to sleep!
Edit : Flair later. On mobile. When will mobile flairing be available?!
[Rant/Rave] After 2 weeks without a scale...
/u/lordjoji [5'3" | CW: 108 lbs | 19.66 | GW: 100 lbs | F]
Created: Wed Aug 31 17:25:18 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50k6r0/after_2_weeks_without_a_scale/
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I moved into college 2 weeks ago and have been eating 300-800 calories a day and exercising 4 times a week. The exercise and eating vegetarian is a new habit for me so I was hoping that I was losing but didn't have a scale in my dorm to measure. Today, I found a fancy scale in our gym and learned that I've dropped 5 lbs, down to 108 lbs! And, that was at 5 pm so my weight in the morning and after fasting is even lower! I'm so happy right now and finally feel like I'm making progress!
[Goal] Post birthday relief
/u/woollyshirt [172cm | 54.7kg | 18.33 | -33.3kg | NB/M]
Created: Wed Aug 31 16:34:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50jyin/post_birthday_relief/
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I made it!
So my original plan to bake cupcakes and not have a birthday cake didn't go quite to plan but I managed to salvage it by picking up preportioned cake cubes (238kcal each!!) for a birthday cake. I went to dinner with my family, ordered what I'd planned to order, and even was able to help myself to a couple of the shared sides because I knew I wasn't going to have the second piece of cake I budgeted for. All this food, and I ate around maintenance, and I expected to go from 54.4 this morning to >56 after dinner, but I'm 55.2. I thought I would feel so anxious tomorrow but I ate dinner a few hours later than normal and I'm still on track to maintain under 55kg!!!
I don't know how I did it but I made it through my own birthday. Next up on the food anxiety agenda is a formal dinner in about a week. Knowing I made it through this makes that seem much more manageable.
I'm very happy today and so proud of myself for getting through this and seeming normal. I ate with family and shared food. I felt normal, even if just for one meal.
[Discussion] What do you eat for protein?
/u/kickkkasss [5'5 | fat | -20lbs | F]
Created: Wed Aug 31 15:15:16 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50jkav/what_do_you_eat_for_protein/
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On mobile can't flair
I try to eat enough protein so I won't have as much muscle loss but I find it so hard to get enough! What do you guys eat to get enough protein??
[Goal] New outfit...posting for accountability. Hopefully down the road, I will have new pics for progress.
/u/throwawaytodayokc [5'4.25" |96.2|16.7|-22 since 8/2015]
Created: Wed Aug 31 14:41:49 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50jebo/new_outfitposting_for_accountability_hopefully/
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http://i.imgur.com/CzO6kTi.jpg?1
[Goal] I wish I had more patience as I very slowly reach my goals...posting here for accountability to keep going/have some progress pics later
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Aug 31 14:31:42 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50jcb8/i_wish_i_had_more_patience_as_i_very_slowly_reach/
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http://imgur.com/FYNDQRh
[Goal] Kind of sad... objectively, I think I can stop losing weight, but I am so unsatisfied with this pic and want to lose so much more. I dont even know what goals I have anymore
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Aug 31 14:26:24 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50jbab/kind_of_sad_objectively_i_think_i_can_stop_losing/
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http://imgur.com/lvA8t02
[Meme/Humor] I achieved a new GW. I ... don't know what happen next.
/u/mandarinexd [5'3" | CW:99 | BMI:17.74 | - 11 lbs | F]
Created: Wed Aug 31 13:43:01 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50j3a5/i_achieved_a_new_gw_i_dont_know_what_happen_next/
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http://i.imgur.com/zOpfzAV.gifv
[Rant/Rave] I have an initial consultation with a new therapist today...
/u/supersizetrainwreck [5'9 | CW 130.7lb | 18.95 | F]
Created: Wed Aug 31 12:26:14 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50iovq/i_have_an_initial_consultation_with_a_new/
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... and I'm not sure I really want to go. I know that I'm sick and that I'm so far down the rabbit hole at this point that I need help if I want to get better. I'm just not sure I want to get better. I'm at the lowest weight I've ever been and only getting smaller and I love it, but I know that I'm not happy. I shouldn't be angry at myself for having a meal that isn't even 400 calories. I shouldn't be terrified of missing any calories in my counts. I want to be ok and not worry when I go out to dinner with people about how I'm going to get away with not eating everything and how to stop myself from finishing my plate. But really I just want to be skinny.
[Help] I don't want to die, buy I don't want to live anymore.
/u/kpatable [5'9" | 125.4 | 18.2/18.5 | -21.9 | F]
Created: Wed Aug 31 12:01:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50ik6w/i_dont_want_to_die_buy_i_dont_want_to_live_anymore/
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https://www.reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50ik6w/i_dont_want_to_die_buy_i_dont_want_to_live_anymore/
[Rant/Rave] Spiraling ~~
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Aug 31 11:14:07 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50ib46/spiraling/
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[deleted]
[Intro] I'm back & life update!
/u/ooo5936 [5'6" | 124.2lbs | GW: 115 | -8.6lbs | F]
Created: Wed Aug 31 11:06:03 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50i9lk/im_back_life_update/
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Hi guys!
Last time I posted it was wedding week and God knows how that goes! Today is the first and actual day that I've been able to post!
In other news, I'm married! Whoo! We went to an all inclusive resort for our honeymoon and I decided I was going to enjoy as much as I want! All the mojitos, margaritas, food, etc. I wanted. And we had a blast! And all in all only gained 5 pounds from 2 weeks - lololololol
Since then we went back home and then I packed up all of my stuff so I could move halfway across the country. This was very emotional for me because I left my childhood home, my parents, my twin (my best friend), my siblings, etc. I feel like I've sacrificed because of my relationship/marriage and it's a weird feeling, but my husband is worth it.
Now that I'm here again I will be restricting again, and I think it's going to be harder because my husband knows about it and doesn't like it when I restrict. So we'll see what happens! I'll appreciate thoughts and wishful prayers that it goes well for me! :)
Feel free to ask any questions! I'm happy to be back!
[Rant/Rave] Dry weight is 113lbs and I feel disgusting.
/u/mckenziemudkip [5'3 | CW:115(-15) GW:88 | BMI 20.93| F/20]
Created: Wed Aug 31 10:37:29 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50i3v3/dry_weight_is_113lbs_and_i_feel_disgusting/
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If you're 113lbs or more don't think I'm calling you disgusting :c
It's just that I was 106 lbs at a "dry" weight not even 3 weeks ago. How can I be so disgusting to gain THAT much?
That's 35,000 calories in 3 weeks.
I can feel my legs rubbing together and getting caught, pinching while I walk. My stomach is made of rolls. I have at least gained two inches of fat on my love handles.
Ugh, fuck. I hate myself so much. I haven't felt this low since my high weight of 140. Gaining after you've lost is so so so fucking hard.
But I feel melodramatic that I'm so down about how much I weigh. Like, there are people who have it waaaaay worse off than gaining 7 pounds. People who have actual problems in their life. But at the same time, this is so real for me.. just super pathetic all around. Fuuuuuck.
Tell me that your days are going awesome. Tell me how great you guys are all doing!
[Discussion] Daily Food Diary! August 31, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Wed Aug 31 10:02:49 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50hx9a/daily_food_diary_august_31_2016/
---
This is a daily food diary thread for August 31, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
[Rant/Rave] Sometimes I don't feel validated to say I have an eating disorder... Also issues with boyfriend and "ED"
/u/TiredOfBeingFat_
Created: Wed Aug 31 10:02:02 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50hx4a/sometimes_i_dont_feel_validated_to_say_i_have_an/
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Never been truly diagnosed, because who bothers to diagnose BED? A lot of people binge eat, but mine was all the time. I never ate all that because I was that hungry. I ate that much because I was struggling with other mental issues I was aware of at 12 or so, but the BED never crossed my mind. Food didn't hurt me, it made me happy. Well, it did; that was until puberty slowed my metabolism down and I put on weight.
Being tall the extra weight never bothered me nor did I notice it until I was 14. That's when people started commenting on my weight. I was always active, but yet I got bigger and never really tried to do anything about it because of major depression/became a major pothead who did nothing but eat.
270 at 15/16 I got tired of it. I hated binging, I began to hate food. I tried to quit eating so much and was 1,000 cals a day, exercised, lost 15 pounds in three weeks. Got lazy and begin to binge, purge, and repeat. Got tired of purging, so I decided to just let myself suffer the after effects of a binge. Some days I'll eat maybe 300 cals, others 1000. Sometimes I restrict so well during the day and then I binge at dinner when I'm home to make sure my boyfriend won't be upset I didn't eat that day. (He's had a difficult situation with his mom and does live with me at my moms)
He cried last night. He fucking cried because of how far I'm willing to go to not hate myself. He's one of the few people I trust with my "ED" Maybe two other people know, everyone else I just tell my IBS flares up and makes me sick to my stomach or my meds make me lose my apitite. He so scared I'm going to hurt myself, but I can't change myself and go back to hating myself for not taking control and being lazy.
But I'm obese... How could I have Ana? Even looking at my mental state and how I feel about my body, I told my boyfriend because we're honest with each other, I'm not going to be happy till I'm nothing, I can't help that's what I want to look like. I want to be pretty, and perfect, like I once was when I was younger. I was tall, thin, and made my parents happy with my schooling. Now that I'm older, I'm still tall, but fat, and behind in school and overall been a big hindrance to my parents. I feel like I just sound like a stupid fat whale who wants to skinny because girls at school tease me. (I don't even get comments because of it anymore so I'm not getting bullied for it. That's not why I want to change my body, I'm doing it for me. I've honestly never stayed commited to something this long. But then at the same time I feel like I can't say I have/had an ED, or am developing one.
I'm so stressed. And It's almost lunchtime at school and I can't count calories in the hot food, but I came prepared with 150 calories worth of pita crackers I've been snacking on this morning.
[Help] DAE have constant heart palpitations with EC stacks?
/u/taeyeons-comrade [perpetual shame]
Created: Wed Aug 31 10:00:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50hwxg/dae_have_constant_heart_palpitations_with_ec/
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The EC stacks work really well, and I can sleep better because I don't go to bed hungry but they give me insane heart palpitations. Usually by nighttime, it calms down but I can feel my heart 24/7. I take a very small amount too. It's really weird, I get the feeling it's just going to stop beating.
[Discussion] Good Date Night Ideas?
/u/supersizetrainwreck [5'9 | CW 130.7lb | 18.95 | F]
Created: Wed Aug 31 08:31:25 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50hgju/good_date_night_ideas/
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Basically just what the title says, cheaper the better. I've done a picnic before where I made low cal stuff, but I still ate more than I wanted to. Any suggestions?
[Help] Free therapy?
/u/MulattoKhaleesi
Created: Wed Aug 31 07:45:59 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50h91r/free_therapy/
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I really need someone to talk to. I've always had bouts of depression but this bout is worse than ever. Seriously, the depression is causing me to do insane shit i never do and I no longer feel like myself. Anyone in the US know where you can get reduced or free therapy sessions? I have insurance but i don't think they will cover it.
At least being depressed stops me from eating, but i just don't think i can keep going like this.
[Rant/Rave] joined burlesque because I lost weight, now I'm fat again and have to perform this weekend
/u/clurrance [5'6" | 114 | 18.5 | F]
Created: Wed Aug 31 07:29:48 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50h6cy/joined_burlesque_because_i_lost_weight_now_im_fat/
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I started taking burlesque classes about 4-5 months ago. Normally, I wouldn't dream of doing something like that, but I had just lost some weight and was feeling good at hovering around 113-115. I could see my bones and everything was great.
Well, as usual, I've eaten my way back up. I've weighed in at 117.6 to 117.8 this entire week. I look revolting.
I perform this weekend with a bunch of other scantily clad ladies. Several of them are knock it out of the park sexy, plus they are experienced dancers. I'm regretting this.
Just had to get that off my chest.
[Goal] I want big boobs and skinny waist!
/u/Skinniminnie [5'3" | 157.0 lbs | 27.6 BMI | -12 lbs | F]
Created: Wed Aug 31 07:16:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50h4fg/i_want_big_boobs_and_skinny_waist/
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I want to keep my boobs. I want to lose everywhere else. Boobs and butt I wouldn't mind keeping. I like the idea of my ribs showing, I love the thought of fitting into clothing that actually looks good on me. And as I go through this, I don't want to lose the boobs and butt.
The first time I fell down low enough to see ribs, I had a 20in waist and 32D boobs still. The actual likely hood of that happening again? No idea but a girl can dream! I just wanna look feminine at the same time as skinny.
[Rant/Rave] [Rant/Rave] I just need to rant and need advice.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Aug 31 06:28:32 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50gx15/rantrave_i_just_need_to_rant_and_need_advice/
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[deleted]
[Discussion] Way To Go Wednesday August 31, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Wed Aug 31 06:03:12 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50gtjv/way_to_go_wednesday_august_31_2016/
---
This is the weekly achievement thread for August 31, 2016.
This weekly thread is to spotlight those achievements you feel don't necessarily warrant their own post, but you'd like to celebrate all the same. This is not limited to specifically ED-related goals; share anything you are happy about having done or accomplished recently!
^Achievement ^threads ^are ^posted ^every ^Wednesday.
^Have ^any ^questions ^or ^concerns? ^Comment ^below, ^or [^PM ^the ^mods.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FproED)
[Help] Confusing love affair with coffee?
/u/brlouse [5'2 | 116.0 | 21.2 | -15 | F]
Created: Wed Aug 31 05:58:23 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50gsx7/confusing_love_affair_with_coffee/
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So.. Coffee is great. It gives me a lot of energy, it makes me stop feeling hungry, it's zero calories - it's great. BUT. After a few hours, it starts to make me feel jittery and sick - and although I don't feel hunger like normal, I do feel this weird empty feeling and I know the only way to stop the jitters/sick feelings/empty feelings is to eat something - and something with carbs too.
Pretty much - I need to absorb the coffee that I drank because the caffeine is getting to me. Does anyone have any suggestions on how to do this without eating or..how to avoid this? Or brands of coffee that won't do this to me? Thanks xx
[Tip] Hunger pains
/u/brlouse [5'2 | 116.0 | 21.2 | -15 | F]
Created: Wed Aug 31 05:28:50 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50gp8v/hunger_pains/
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Last night I felt awful - my entire torso was covered in twinges of pain, but I didn't want to eat anything before sleeping. Then I remembered I had the large electric heat pack - it felt AMAZING and made all the pain go away so I could sleep. Just wanted to share this discovery <3
[Help] Snacks/lunches for school?
/u/venetianrosequartz [5'6"|CW 140|HW 153|LW 130|GW 135|UGW 112|WL -13| BMI 22.6|Female]
Created: Wed Aug 31 04:40:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50gjmc/snackslunches_for_school/
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I am at college about 9 hours a day, because I don't have a car. Do you guys have any ideas on what low cal snacks and low cal lunches I can bring? I usually eat Fiber One 90 calorie bars and I have a whole wheat tortilla with lettuce and veggies. Thanks! (Btw I'm vegetarian, and I can't flair I'm on mobile)
[Help] Best scale?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Aug 31 03:02:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50g9a5/best_scale/
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[deleted]
[Help] binge cancellation
/u/jrste310 [5 ft | 106 lb | 21.34 | -21.5| Female]
Created: Wed Aug 31 02:30:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50g5yv/binge_cancellation/
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binged HARD today and have to be in a bathing suit friday- what do i do/ eat the next few days?!?!?
[Discussion] what are your rewards when you hit your goal weight(s)?
/u/awfuljusttosee [5'5" | 62.2kg | 22.04 | -4.7kg | F]
Created: Wed Aug 31 02:29:22 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50g5sj/what_are_your_rewards_when_you_hit_your_goal/
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https://www.reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50g5sj/what_are_your_rewards_when_you_hit_your_goal/
[Thinspo] Tuesday Thinspo: Black and White
/u/dbishop22
Created: Wed Aug 31 02:28:13 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50g5o3/tuesday_thinspo_black_and_white/
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https://imgur.com/gallery/9Trz0
[Goal] Nervous to post, but proud of today!
/u/Axele61
Created: Wed Aug 31 00:37:02 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50ftux/nervous_to_post_but_proud_of_today/
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I've been in a relapse (AN) for months now. I started to follow my meal plan given by my treatment team. I followed for a while, but I started to gain weight. I knew I would, but it came faster than I'd like because I started some hormones to try to get my period again. I've only gained maybe 6 lbs. For the first time in years, I'm terrified to step on the scale! I feel so uncomfortable in my body right now. I think about it all fucking day. But I know someone who wears my clothes, can't be anywhere close to how I feel I look.
Well, yesterday I started to restrict a bit. But today I woke up and decided that I must restrict to get this under control. I succeeded! I've taken my ambien and I'm about to have my little snack. Day 1,back on top of things! I just wish restricting didn't take all my patience to deal with other people. At least I'm good with Fiancé.
I don't have flair on mobile. If you can relate to any of this, please respond!
[Thinspo] Wedding-y Thinspo Tuesday
/u/jemmeow [5"9| Godzilla| BMI 26 | F]
Created: Wed Aug 31 00:06:53 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50fqo7/weddingy_thinspo_tuesday/
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http://imgur.com/a/n9zAD
[Tip] Yup, poisoned myself yesterday and today (by accident of course), ended up liking/missing it.
/u/cannibale101 [5'5 | HW:150smtg | CW:120,8 | GW:118 | 28F]
Created: Tue Aug 30 21:25:12 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50f632/yup_poisoned_myself_yesterday_and_today_by/
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I made hummus with a bag of dehydrated cannellini beans someone left at my place. I followed an online recipe (you don't usually make hummus with cannellini beans) that didn't specify to cook the beans, plus it's not written anywhere on the bag. The hummus tastes great and i figured the more pronounced texture must be alright, can't expect it to be exactly like chickpeas... Ended up binging on it for the rest of the night.
I felt awful afterwards and thought it was just because of the binge and the self-loathing, but the second i laid in bed i had to get back up and run to the toilet. I think my body purged everything all at once, it was very... powerful. I knew something wasn't right but in the meantime i was really happy and relieved that i got to "cancel" that binge so easily.
Today after work i ate a bit more of it, started to feel nauseous again and only then did i think it might be the problem. I (kept on eating while i) googled it (shame on me). I usually use canned beans so i didn't know that you actually have to cook them for at least an hour after they've soaked overnight. Beans/legumes contain a natural toxin called lectin, present in various concentration depending on the bean -kidney beans being among the most concentrated hence dangerous. We have to cook the beans properly to get rid of that toxin or else we get food poisoning, with symptoms including nausea, vomitting, diarrhea, cramps, etc. It can lead to hospitalisation and more serious, long-term problems like coeliac disease or colorectal cancer. Canned beans are precooked so they're not a problem.
THEN i stopped eating hahah (-_-), but the ED part of my brain wanted to keep going for the sweet sweet relief of "cancellation" that would follow. Rational brain won this round though, which is a bittersweet victory because 1) i hate having to throw food away, 2) it was my only healthy option at home, so i went crazy and ate crap all night, and 3) i have to live with it this time. I hear that b/ping is an awful awful way of living and plain mental/physical torture but part of me is still sad and frustrated that i don't do that and have to live with the consequences of the binge AND the cancelled workout (because i was too sick to even think straight).
TL/DR : Cook your beans/legumes, people. Only soaking them overnight isn't enough, you'll get food poisoning. I "liked" vomiting all over the place and getting rid of the food so effortlessly but after a quick google search i learned that it could've been way worse and that a long-term consumption of lectin (a natural toxin in legumes and beans) can lead to coeliac disease and colorectal cancer. Something to consider ;) Still angry that i can't just keep "cancelling" binges like that though.
[Rant/Rave] ED rubbing off on fiancé [rant]
/u/anotherbigone [5'6" | HW 182 | LW 112 | CW 164]
Created: Tue Aug 30 21:11:29 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50f40t/ed_rubbing_off_on_fiancé_rant/
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So over the past few years I've REALLY let myself go (from underweight to ten pounds over weight) and I've made a commitment the past few months to start counteracting that by restricting again.
My calorie goal is 800. Some days I'm over, some under. I cook basically the same foods for my fiancé, but more of them, and I throw my portion of rice and potatoes away. I try to make sure he gets slightly more than a normal calorie amount.
The only problem is /he won't finish more than 2/3 of his plate/ and is leaving behind high cal foods. As far as I can tell he's only eating 300 cals more than me per meal, which basically leaves him with the same caloric deficit as me.
It's like, what gives? A month ago it was 'I'm allowed to be fat, I'm enlightened'. Now he's losing weight faster than me as I'm retaining water around my menses, and it makes me feel like shit. It triggers me to restrict more, when I would have thought I was doing well otherwise.
I know this is partially due to our being without weed, but he was still eating less than normal a couple weeks ago when we had some. Has anybody else had an experience like this? Beyond my own ego, he's eating less than I feel is healthy (we're vegan so I could see him feeling full before reaching his calorie goal), and I really don't want him to develop some kind of 'complex' because of my on self image...
[Discussion] EDs, the invisible mental health disorder
/u/throwawayyaymatehaha [5'3" | CW: 94 | 17.11 | -32 | F]
Created: Tue Aug 30 21:01:07 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50f2je/eds_the_invisible_mental_health_disorder/
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We've all seen Facebook posts with something along the lines of "How to act toward someone with depression/anxiety". There's so much awareness of these mental health disorders, and so much funding put in to research and treat them. But no one talks about eating disorders, because it's considered personal, though there are millions of people silently suffering. They are so misunderstood, from the outsiders who come in to this sub and have a downvote brigade and want to have us banned, to people casually joking about it in real life as if it's nothing, to people blaming the media and Photoshop even though eating disorders date back to the 1800s, to people saying "just eat". I really wish it were that simple, but they have no idea of the mental hell we're going through day to day, thought to thought.
There are medications for depression and anxiety. But there is no pill that will magically make me see myself for what I really am, or make that part of me shut up. No, there's only rehabilitation programs, which treat you on the outside, but can't ever fix you on the inside. It's hard to face the fact that I may never get to a happy place mentally. And no doubt other mental disorders suck, but I always think, why this? why couldn't I have been stuck with something else?
[Rant/Rave] Body Dysmorphia is a bitch
/u/stephanynotstokes [5'6 |Weight Lost: 70 lbs | F]
Created: Tue Aug 30 20:46:21 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50f0dr/body_dysmorphia_is_a_bitch/
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BD will have you so fucked up. You will be convinced you didn't loose any weight and you don't look any different. Its wild.
[Rant/Rave] I'm really stupid
/u/NindeNehima [5'2" | 95.5 | 18.06 | F]
Created: Tue Aug 30 20:10:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50eusz/im_really_stupid/
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Hey everyone,
This is a bit of a drunk rant, I'm sorry. I'm just freaking out at myself and have no one to talk to because the only people I apparently talk to are guys that I've ****ed.
I just told my creepy, stalkerish ex my address. He's in town until tomorrow morning and wants to see me. And of course I've had a few glasses of wine by now and I'm messed up. I don't want to see him, I don't want him to force me to have sex with him again. He was not a good boyfriend, he would purposely make me cry because of my weight issues and LAUGH about it. I was so happy when he had to leave the country due to visa issues.
And I told him he could COME OVER. What is wrong with me?! I want to be the "nice" person, see old "friends" when they are in town and be considerate... but he used to fuck with my mind and body for fun, I shouldn't ever see him again.
But of course I got drunk tonight (Yay for terrible coping mechanisms) and I consented to this...
I'm really sorry for the rant you guys, this is just the only place I ever really feel safe anymore. I think he might be here...
*Edited: Thank you everyone so much for your concern! I was having a rough night and don't know why I let myself get to that place. Nothing too terrible happened, though he did get mad at me about not eating and going on antidepressants... He would ask why I'm crying, why do you think I'm crying, you forced yourself over here and now you are trying to violate me?! Done with angry rant now. Thank you so much for listening <3*
Heart feels empty, so my entire body will be
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Aug 30 19:44:43 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50eqk5/heart_feels_empty_so_my_entire_body_will_be/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] I need to stop weighing everyday. (useless rant)
/u/stephanynotstokes [5'6 |Weight Lost: 70 lbs | F]
Created: Tue Aug 30 18:54:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50eigd/i_need_to_stop_weighing_everyday_useless_rant/
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I weigh myself every single day. EVERY.SINGLE.DAY. I see every single weight fluctuation, every pound gained/lost and its really driving me crazy. If i gain a pound my entire fucking day is ruined and I just....dont know if I can take it anymore. Its really killing me mentally. I need to stop punishing myself.
Ive plateaued after 2 weeks of loosing non-stop weight and then I gained 3 pounds and it hurts. I was in the shower today and spent a solid 20 minutes just looking down, at my stomach and my thighs tearing apart my body. Screaming at myself (on the inside) because I'm not loosing weight. Idk....anyone else going through this?
[Help] fasting and anxiety
/u/behindthearmory
Created: Tue Aug 30 17:55:05 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50e8ju/fasting_and_anxiety/
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i've been fasting on and off for a few years and have never had any problems. as of this past week, however, when i restrict to <250 calories a day i have a lot of panic attacks, shortness of breath and chest pain.
any advice on continuing the fasting without all the anxiety symptoms? or at least advice in taking the edge off the anxiety?
thanks!
[Rant/Rave] Trigger warning!! Family friend made a joke about anorexia
/u/bitterorbetter [5'5| 145| 24.1 | -15 | F19]
Created: Tue Aug 30 17:21:36 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50e35g/trigger_warning_family_friend_made_a_joke_about/
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We were at a family party this past weekend and a family friend who is on the heavier side said that she was beating anorexia one slice of cake at a time and laughed. This was meant to be a joke as she knows she's overweight and doesn't care.
For some reason, that really set me off. I want to show her that it isn't a joke and that she's disgusting and always will be.
It made me so mad but brought some much needed motivation so I guess it's a win overall.
[Goal] Two goals in one day!
/u/boneobsessed [5'4" | Sw 173lbs | Cw 158.2lbs | -14 lbs | Gw 95lbs | F]
Created: Tue Aug 30 17:12:42 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50e1nz/two_goals_in_one_day/
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Last week at my grandfathers birthday my favourite aunt came up to me and said "What's going on with you? You've lost so much weight! Are you okay?" I can not even describe how good that felt to hear that from her! Obviously I lied and said I've been eating healthily but I was so excited that someone noticed. Also later my grandmother came up to me and asked if I've started wearing white makeup because someone at the party asked her if I was sick or just wearing white makeup. Nope! I'm just naturally this pale! Definitely made my day!
[Thinspo] Delia Iannalfo's transformation (BMI 29 vs 19! 👌🏼)
/u/Noroeste [5'6 | can fit in a rowboat | F]
Created: Tue Aug 30 16:50:00 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50dxw2/delia_iannalfos_transformation_bmi_29_vs_19/
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http://i.imgur.com/bnuT5hs.png
[Intro] Legs
/u/agentcherrycola
Created: Tue Aug 30 16:22:27 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50dt6c/legs/
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My legs are probably my #1 most hated body part. I'm 5'10" so although they're longer than average, I constantly feel like they'll never be like my legs-for-days thinspo ideal. My thighs have always been big too, and even though my waist is now 3" smaller, I'm not convinced they've reduced at all. Sometimes I can't even look at them because it triggers suicidal thoughts, and I have to avoid any kind of thigh-showing clothing.
[These](https://imgur.com/a/Ib3ey) are my thighs. I'm sure all of these thoughts are exaggerated, but I just wanted to share.
[Goal] Overheard from the patient next to me in the hospital
/u/negativeraisins [5'0" | 69 lb | 14.19 | -53 lb | FTM]
Created: Tue Aug 30 15:56:28 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50dorm/overheard_from_the_patient_next_to_me_in_the/
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"Something something... Going into third grade?" (I'm in the children's hospital.)
Five minutes later: "Weight: 67.3 pounds? Okay!"
My first reaction was "dammit, they're lighter than me, dammit," and then my second was
... Holy shit, I'm only three pounds lighter than a *third grader*? How the hell?
It'll be gone soon, but for now I'm damn proud.
[Rant/Rave] :/
/u/screamingfalcon [5'7.5"/171.45cm | CW: 2fat4me | GW: 121 | UGW: 108 | F22]
Created: Tue Aug 30 15:41:25 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50dm5r/_/
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So I have some ads I've seen on Craigslist for being painted nude, giving massages in lingerie, etc. the problem is, I still feel fat as fuck, though objectively I know I'm healthy. Has anyone else here ever done anything like this?
Im terrified the person will see me in real life and think I'm fat and tell me to leave or that I'll be super self conscious, even though I'm pretty good at winging it. I'm trying to lose the most amount of weight I can the next few days, but I feel like I'm on the verge of a breakdown :( I'm broke as fuck, so it's like... I *have* to do this.
I guess this is kind of a rant, but also, does anyone have tips or advice or anything? <3
[Intro] intro and a couple of little questions
/u/ozh_esta [5'3.5" | CW 122 | GW 102 | 21.77 | -28lbs | NB]
Created: Tue Aug 30 15:05:03 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50dfp1/intro_and_a_couple_of_little_questions/
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hi, everyone! i've been lurking here for about a month but am fiiinally getting up the courage to post.
a little backstory: i started restricting at the beginning of last school year, and i dropped from 147lbs allll the way down to 115 in about three or four months. from there i kind of stagnated between 115/120.
when i went home for christmas break everyone was talking about my weight loss, my mom was concerned about me so i put in a serious effort to not restrict/"recover" but i learned pretty quickly that you really don't ever stop focusing on food. i maintained at 116 from january until may, just exercising two/three times a week and eating infrequent but full meals.
unfortunately, like the second i stopped actively restricting i got really really depressed, so coping with that + going home for the summer + starting birth control again meant that i ended up gaining almost ten pounds. (which, wow, yikes.)
anyway! i'm back in my college town in a new apartment, and i'm already 5lbs down, which is super exciting. yesterday's intake was less than 600, and according to my fitbit (which i don't know how much i trust) + mfp, i burned about 300 of those. today all i've had was an iced coffee and i feel phenomenal.
here's my question: my roommate and i have known each other since we were 13/14. when they were about 15, they developed an ED and were hospitalized multiple times, i believe. my roommate says that they're recovered, as it's been almost 6 years since their hospitalization, but i'm still very scared to trigger them?
we've discussed this before (they know c/o a drunk phonecall last year that i have some ED habits, but the fact that i'm not underweight stopped me from admitting i had an ED for a looong time). however, we don't have a scale in the house because that's a trigger for them, and things like that.
my questions are: 1) can anyone recommend a small scale that i could fit in my closet that my roommate doesn't have to know about? and 2) what are some ways that i can keep up my habits without triggering my roommate? they tend to make dinner and decide meals that we eat together, so i've just been fasting during the day so i can eat dinner and seem "normal", are there any other good tips?
**tldr: i've recently developed an ED; my roommate has been "recovered" for a few years. how can i continue restricting/weighing myself/all of my habits without triggering them?**
[Discussion] Dance cardio! Anyone else?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Aug 30 14:56:25 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50de66/dance_cardio_anyone_else/
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[deleted]
I'm so cold
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Aug 30 14:19:18 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50d75v/im_so_cold/
---
[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] I HATE BINGING.
/u/downtownhomebound
Created: Tue Aug 30 14:13:26 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50d63o/i_hate_binging/
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Oops, I did it again. Damn it.
This whole weekend I was at a festival so I ate "normally" (churros both days like an IDIOT) and yesterday I decided to make up for it by having a fast day. Good for me, right? Taking responsibility for my actions? No, wrong. I had an amazing fast day, felt so nice and empty and awesome, and I continued not eating until lunch today. That was not the plan. My normal routine is "don't eat until dinner, have a normal portion of something low-cal" and that works for me. But I had lunch. I had a tiny lunch. Iceberg lettuce, those things that look like pea pods but aren't (what are they called in english? we call 'em haricots verts but I have no idea... Green beans?) and cabbage. And even though my lunch barely tipped 100 kcal, I freaked out about the rest of the day. I just kept thinking that I fucked up my fast day because I usually have one meal per day and if I had two it was all for nothing, because I would have eaten my fast day's meal. So, when dinnertime came, instead of skipping it and telling my dear mother that I ate before she came home, I ate everything appetizing in my house. I had a big bowl of yogurt and cereal. I had lettuce and hummus. I had mango. I had a big actual dinner with a big portion of rice and veggie burgers (didn't even finish it... I'm so good at not wasting food). I feel so sick! My stomach doesn't have a clue what is happening right now. One day I have nothing for 36 hours straight, the next I eat 2000+ calories and want to die. Sorry about having to read that, but thanks for listening.
[Discussion] What do you guys do when you're going to be home all day?
/u/taeyeons-comrade [perpetual shame]
Created: Tue Aug 30 14:08:15 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50d57v/what_do_you_guys_do_when_youre_going_to_be_home/
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I'm too hungry and unfocused to think of anything to do. It seems whatever I try, I just can't bring myself to focus on anything, not even watching tv.
[Rant/Rave] I feel guilty for liking this
/u/Lunar_Heart [61.75 in | 84 lbs | 16.08 | -23 | f]
Created: Tue Aug 30 13:49:37 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50d1v4/i_feel_guilty_for_liking_this/
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For me, it's always just been a diet. Something I decided to do to have a body that suits my mind, and it works. It makes me happy, I love myself, I love the symptoms, I love it all. I love the feeling of being unwell and it's just how I want to live my life. Then I read about the way other's struggle with it and it makes me feel awful, like here I am loving what's an absolute hell for others. There are people who would kill to free their mind of this, and I love it with a passion and embrace it as my best attribute. Maybe its's because I don't really have any other attributes. I write, I starve, I binge and purge, and I read. That's it. This is the only interesting thing about me, I don't know. I don't know, but I'm sorry.
[Other] I think you are worthwhile, and valuable, and so strong and brave.
/u/smokesanddietcokes [<3 ]
Created: Tue Aug 30 13:37:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50czqn/i_think_you_are_worthwhile_and_valuable_and_so/
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Whether you fasted today.. and whether you tried, but didn't manage it.
Whether you restricted. Whether you were successful or not at that, too.
If you ate to your TDEE.
If you ate above it.
If you binged.
If you binged and then purged.
Whether you worked out, or not.
No matter what you did today, or yesterday, or will do tomorrow..
You are strong, and brave, and I believe in you. You are worthwhile. You are beautiful.
ONE DAY I WILL WIN THE LOTTERY AND BUY US ALL A CASTLE AND WE CAN LIVE THERE AND THERE WILL BE *SO MANY FLUFFY BUNNIES*
ILY stay safe <3
[Rant/Rave] Vacation Troubles [Rant]
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Aug 30 13:29:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50cy3k/vacation_troubles_rant/
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[deleted]
[Goal] Saying hello to my new friend Ana.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Aug 30 13:26:44 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50cxnl/saying_hello_to_my_new_friend_ana/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] Low-cal, full flavor haul from target. So excited!
/u/thatonegirlfrommath [5'5" | 131.2 | 21.8 | F]
Created: Tue Aug 30 13:09:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50cucv/lowcal_full_flavor_haul_from_target_so_excited/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/f6269c7f44f541489afecbb93c7eecb3?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=4e266210ef82748ea1bf78f42593785e
[Other] This stuff is awesome. You can have the whole bag for only 150 calories. And it actually tastes pretty good!
/u/emilyjolene [5"6 | 128 | 20 | f]
Created: Tue Aug 30 13:05:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50ctow/this_stuff_is_awesome_you_can_have_the_whole_bag/
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https://i.redd.it/rheguopcikix.jpg
[Other] "Starving in Suburbia"
/u/c_marier [5'6"| 112 | 18.1 | -13 | 22F]
Created: Tue Aug 30 12:51:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50cr24/starving_in_suburbia/
---
I found this Lifetime movie on putlocker the other night. It was in a list of movies on IMDB tagged for eating disorder. I only made it about 30 minutes in, because I started it fairly late at night, but so far it seems really good and well made too. It's about a 17-year-old dancer who starts looking at Thinsporation and gradually gets obsessed. I think it was made to 2012. Anyone else seen or heard of it?
[Discussion] DAE watch gross videos to avoid binges??
/u/thirdocean
Created: Tue Aug 30 12:27:01 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50cmg5/dae_watch_gross_videos_to_avoid_binges/
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On mobile so no flair :(
I watch video on like surgeries and hoarders and stuff to make me feel sick so I can't eat
[Discussion] For the Girls. What about your Period?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Aug 30 12:17:35 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50ckop/for_the_girls_what_about_your_period/
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[deleted]
[Goal] Making a scary choice
/u/throwawaynm88 [Height 5'3.5"| CW 114.6 lbs| BMI 20| SW 125 lbs| GW 100 lbs]
Created: Tue Aug 30 12:10:52 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50cjf2/making_a_scary_choice/
---
I can't handle being so weak every day, not sleeping all night, and not being able to even stand up or go up the stairs without being afraid of fainting.. I have little kids and I need to at least try to be my best for them..
I used a TDEE weight loss calculator, and decided to follow the results.. putting me at 1377 calories a day, instead of 1000. But it will also give me the energy to start working out every single day as well, to burn some of that off. I really hope I don't gain, and I hope I still lose at the rate that losertown says that I will!!
Today is day 1, so, I'm not sure how it's going to go yet.. I am eating raw until dinner, one cooked meal serving at dinner, no food past 6 pm.. and once a month I plan to juice fast until dinner(with a raw dinner) for 5-7 days. I really hope this helps my sleep and energy levels, because my mental health has been starting to deteriorate on 2 hours of sleep a night.
[Rant/Rave] I just want to always be the smallest person in the room
/u/throwawaytodayokc [5'4.25" |96.2|16.7|-22 since 8/2015]
Created: Tue Aug 30 11:38:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50cd79/i_just_want_to_always_be_the_smallest_person_in/
---
We had a new intern start today...she is tiny, and a runner. She is working as one of our nutrition educators, and the competitive side of me is motivated to reach 90 lbs so that I can be smaller...
I just...can't handle not being the thinnest person in the room. If I have doubts, I start to spend too much time body checking and comparing. At 90 lbs, I'll surely be the smallest most of the time. Then I can stop...right?
[Goal] Losing 15 lbs in 2 months for revenge. Am I being unrealistic?
/u/italia4386 [5'7 | 133 | 22 | F]
Created: Tue Aug 30 11:20:37 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50c9r2/losing_15_lbs_in_2_months_for_revenge_am_i_being/
---
Long story short, I've been eating like shit. I found out my boyfriend cheated on me for months while we were together. We had planned on doing long distance for a year, since we just graduated from university. But lo and behold, I found out he's a complete scumbag.
I wish I was one of those girls that completely wastes away when they get cheated on, too upset to even eat. But for some reason I'm the complete opposite. When I'm dating someone, I always want to look good and skinny for them. I really control my weight. But when it's over, it's like I just go "well, fuck it."
I'm not trying to look sexy for anyone. I'm upset and sad and I just eat whatever the fuck I want to try and feel better.
It's been a month, and I'm at about 133 lbs now. I'm 5 '7, so not massive but not where i want to be at all. I feel chubby and gross. I was as low 115 last summer, which felt incredible, and I was around 120 this whole year, which was good.
We have our alumni reunion in exactly 2 months, and I know my ex is going to be there. I know if I keep the way I am ill be a huge whale by then and I WILL NOT let it happen. He needs to see a tiny, beautiful me...that he lost by being a piece of shit. I want him to regret the minute he ever touched the other girl.
That being said...is it realistic to lose around 15 pounds in 2 months if I really, really try? I've done intense restricting before but not for that long. How do I begin to shrink my stomach and get to work? Has anyone lost this much in this amount of time?
Thank you...I'm hoping my anger and need for revenge will help me with this one. Any advice/tips are very welcome.
[Other] I admitted to my boyfriend that I feel he wont love me if I eat 'too much'/binge, or if I look fat or bloated on our mini-break away.
/u/smokesanddietcokes [<3 ]
Created: Tue Aug 30 11:14:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50c8il/i_admitted_to_my_boyfriend_that_i_feel_he_wont/
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He replied with this:
>"I will love you if you eat lots, and I will love you if you don't eat lots. I will love you through all the times you feel happy with your body, and I will love you when you don't - when you feel bloated and horrible. I loved you when you were the size you were when we first met, and I love you at the size you are now, and I will still love you regardless of what size you may/may not end up in the future. I love YOU, and no big/small amount of food/weight will change that in the slightest. Please let the destructive/self-doubting part of your brain put that in its pipe and smoke it."
.. can't argue with that.
*-melts into a puddle of goo-*
I'm ready to enjoy my mini-vacation with my amazing boyfriend :) <3
[Other] The Private Report on My Lesbian Experience with Loneliness [manga] [w: self-harm]
/u/softwearing
Created: Tue Aug 30 11:09:48 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50c7ms/the_private_report_on_my_lesbian_experience_with/
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http://imgur.com/a/GxKNB
[Thinspo] Tuesday Thinspo
/u/FaithHopeTrick [5'7 | CW 123 GW 119 |19.20 | -32lbs | F]
Created: Tue Aug 30 11:03:52 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50c6gr/tuesday_thinspo/
---
https://imgur.com/a/Cp23c
[Discussion] Does anyone else hear voices?
/u/ForeverEmptyInside [5'9"| CW:133 lbs | BMI 19.6 | LW:104lbs | M]
Created: Tue Aug 30 10:49:18 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50c3r2/does_anyone_else_hear_voices/
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Hello friends,
Sorry if this post seems a little "out of the norm". But a thought recently came to my attention. Before I had an eating disorder, I didn't really understand the illness that well. I was ignorant, and thought it was all about being underweight. Now I realize that there is a strong mental component aswell. In the beginning, it was described to me as "disordered thoughts". But as I ventured farther and farther into therapy I realized multiple therapists/doctors refer to the "ED voice" aka those disordered thoughts.
I've seen it time and time again on posts across the internet but I don't know if it's been really addressed. When you guys hear "the voice of ana/ed" in your mind, do you hear it as if it was an actual auditory hallucination? I heard some people do and some people don't.
For me, it can vary. Sometimes it just feels like very strong thoughts that aren't my own (whether I recognize it or not). Other times the voice feels so clear, I can give it a gender. For me, "ED" doesn't feel like a suitable name because it feels a lot more feminine in nature. Hence why I prefer "ana".
I guess a natural extension of this question, is do you considered yourself delusional? Delusions (aka strong, fixed, false beliefs) is generally a marker of a psychiatric illness, such as "I believe aliens implanted a microchip into my brain". I've heard it argued before that people with anorexia suffer from the delusion that they are "severely overweight, despite being extremely underweight" .... However, personally, I have a hard time believing this one. For the most part, I actually do feel as if I have a lot more weight to lose.
Anyways, back on topic. When your "ED voice" is going off in your mind, do you guys actually (sometimes) hear auditory hallucinations? Or would you consider it just strong, obstructive thoughts?
I'm curious about this topic!(:
[Rant/Rave] Missing my ED... feels like I lost a friend
/u/whatupmyknitta [5'2'' | 169.8lbs | 31 | -5lbs| female]
Created: Tue Aug 30 10:49:07 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50c3pm/missing_my_ed_feels_like_i_lost_a_friend/
---
Sorry in advance if this is all over the place!
I don't think anyone else will understand/not judge me.
I both hated and loved my (now ex-)boyfriend of 3 years all at the same time when he called me out on my ED and insisted I get help. After much push-back and several stumbles along the way, I felt like I was back on (a "normal") track with food. I stopped restricting, stopped purging, and had a fairly healthy perception of my body (I think). This wavered sometimes, with purging only maybe three-five times since March, but overall I was making good progress and, although I still wanted to lose fat, I was maintaining my weight or losing healthily about 1-4lbs a month.
Then, June happened.
Broke up, plus sick in bed for over a week, plus major family drama, ^you ^get ^the ^idea.
Of course, I have fallen right back into the cycle. But I've been fighting it this time... which is almost like a show I put on for myself to pretend I'm *trying* to be healthy, when all I want is that fleeting feeling... that feeling of CONTROL. That feeling of I"M BETTER THAN EVERYONE ELSE...especially "old me". That feeling of I WILL BE IN CHARGE OF MY OWN PAIN. That feeling of MEASURABLE SUCCESS when I look at the scale... my body... my clothes. All of those feelings and more, that kept me company in my time of need. That kept propelling me forward, day in and day out.
Now, I am finally snapping back to reality and I am disgusted with what I have let myself become!!! Gained 20lbs (not an exaggeration) in only 2 months by being a depressed ball of lazy and sad and sleeping/eating in bed 80% of the time. I single-handedly undid all of my progress, feel completely uncomfortable in my skin, can't wear the majority of my clothes, and just overall feel like a failure. I am unmotivated with everything (room, hygiene, classes, other responsibilities, etc), and am so disappointed in myself.
I don't know if I started out writing this for support or as a rant, but any feedback would be appreciated. I know I haven't posted here in a while, but I still feel like you all get me like no one else.
Starting today, I am officially taking my life back. And, tbh, probably my ED. But at the very least, I will (try) do each of the following every day:
-Brush my teeth and hair
-Shower
-Change clothes
-Put laundry and garbage away, NOT on floor
-Read and/or do schoolwork for at least one hour
-Swim, bicycle, or workout for at least one hour
-Drink at least 8 glasses of water
-Take my meds
-Keep track of my meals and weight
Thanks to anyone who reads this all the way through, It helps to think I have to be accountable to someone other than myself!
TLDR; stopped ED behaviors for a while but stress and life happened and I miss my old friend. I will take my life back.
edit:formatting
[Rant/Rave] Crying because I'm stupid. (not ed related)
/u/GoalsandGossip [5'10" | CW 181.4 | BMI 26 | GW 175 | UGW 125 | F |]
Created: Tue Aug 30 10:41:26 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50c29e/crying_because_im_stupid_not_ed_related/
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I am trying to get my life together and one thing I need to do before I even get a real job, I had planned on doing this morning. But because my ex told me he would give me a ride but then found better things first thing in the fucking morning to do I'm at home sobbing. We still live together and he acts like he wants me gone but then makes it hard for me to leave. I'm so tired of feeling so helpless. I don't want our mutual friends knowing how bad it is with him but I need to ask for help from someone who won't offer simply because offering to help gives an opportunity to sabotage me. He'll be mad but when isn't he mad. I can't just sit by and let this happen and if I get up early and take his car to get my info he can play victim for it.
[Goal] I got this message on OkCupid. So validating.
/u/kpatable [5'9" | 125.4 | 18.2/18.5 | -21.9 | F]
Created: Tue Aug 30 10:35:03 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50c13p/i_got_this_message_on_okcupid_so_validating/
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http://imgur.com/a/k4MQ4
[Discussion] How noticeable will 8 lbs be?
/u/avocadorable [5'3.5" | 103.8 | 18.53 | -37 | F]
Created: Tue Aug 30 10:29:22 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50bzzu/how_noticeable_will_8_lbs_be/
---
My bf does not know I have relapsed, but he knows I'm losing weight 'in an attempt to be healthier'. The other night he told me if I dripped below 100lbs he'd start to worry. Flair is correct currently and next gw is 92 lbs. What I'm wondering is if it'll be super obvious if I drop those extra 8 and say I'm 100. We live together, but he doesn't watch what I eat at all which is great. I just don't want him to worry but I also kind of want to hit my gw *more* if that makes sense...
[Rant/Rave] Through Crisis, I have had a revelation (dumb rant)
/u/honeytarte [5'5" | CW: 119 | GW: 105 | -25 |]
Created: Tue Aug 30 10:12:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50bwws/through_crisis_i_have_had_a_revelation_dumb_rant/
---
My title sounds so biblical lol. Anyways, while I was lying awake at 2:50 AM last night hating myself I had a sudden realization about why fasting and restricting and knowing what I want has become so hard when it used to be so easy, which I talked about in my post yesterday.
My primary goals used to be the behaviors themselves. Like my goal wasn't "get to my goal weight by XX day" or "undo the damage that my binge did," my goals were just "fast for 2 days" and "eat xxx calories." My focus was on having control and being in control, and the weight loss was just an outward reminder of how in control I'd been.
But these past few weeks to a month, my goals have shifted to getting to goal weights and whatnot, which I've determined is something I can't do because then it opens up options and the gratification is not so instant. when your goal is to fast for 3 days, the only way to reach that goal is to fast for 3 days. When your goal is to reach 110, you can do that lots of ways, like fasting, or low restriction or high restriction and that opens up the door for me to lose control and end up binging.
So starting today, I am only weighing myself once a week and I'm gonna fast like crazy because I know I can do it and I need to feel in control of something. I don't care how much I weigh, I don't care about any of that, I only care that between now and Friday nothing but water touches my lips.
Wish me luck and thanks for reading my dumb rant!!
[Discussion] What's a weird thing you're proud of?
/u/Mi__ra [165cm |49 kg | 18.22 | 0 | F]
Created: Tue Aug 30 10:12:03 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50bwr0/whats_a_weird_thing_youre_proud_of/
---
I'm proud of the blisters I have in my hands because of working out, and I wondered if you guys had something similar?
[Discussion] Daily Food Diary! August 30, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Tue Aug 30 10:02:17 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50buxz/daily_food_diary_august_30_2016/
---
This is a daily food diary thread for August 30, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
[Help] How to handle pushy people?
/u/yocumtown
Created: Tue Aug 30 09:59:18 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50budg/how_to_handle_pushy_people/
---
Don't know how to flair on mobile sorry!
Okay so here's the deal. For the past few weeks I've been ever so gently toying with the idea of recovery. Last week I finally went to an Eating Disorder Center for a level of care assesment.
During the appointment the doctor pretty much put the fear of God in me. I already knew it would be bad, everything was just much worse than I expected and she wanted me inpaitient that same day. Since the logistics would be impossible and I'm not actually prepared to full heartedly recover I refused and will enter outpaitient treatment soon(maybe). However, this appointment did lead to my sharing the struggles I've been having with my father and step mother.
Since I shared the information with them my life has been hellish. My father is constant in his attempts to insert himself as the leader of team recovery and ignores any protests. So far, he's tried bullying me into moving in with him(I would be living out of a bag on his couch) and giving him full access to my treatment team(I'm 21 so no). Its worth mentioning that I don't even have a team yet as my intake appointment was five days ago!
Then there are the hurtful comments, saying things like "you just look unhealthy" when I'm almost exactly in the middle of what would be considered the healthy range. (Even though I'm considered a healthy weight my labs and all were shit because I've managed to drop a ton of weight in a very short period) Almost every conversation he manages to work his way to questions about my food intake or weight. They even think for some reason that it's okay to ask personal questions about what my ED means to me, my body image, how it started, etc.
Like no, you see this skin? This is where MY body begins, nothing that happens on or under this skin is under your control so efff right on off.
I've tried to explain nicely, using I statements and all that crap, that this is something I need to do. That they are hurting more than helping, and it feels as if they've stopped even seeing me as a person. I haven't even mentioned how if I was actually "a part of him, and he would kill for me" as he is so find of saying that he might've thought to help out when I was being neglected and abused by my mother for 17 years.
Nothing seems to change their behavior and I'm really regretting letting them in on the bit I did (I was scared and wanted to finally get it off my chest, hindsight being 20/20 I wouldn't have said a damn thing). It's like they have zero regard for me, and am, in their mind, no longer privy to any autonomy.
Had anyone had a similiar experience, what is your situation like now? Is there a way for me to salvage this, and return to some sort of normal? What can I say/ how can I word what I'm trying to say so that the message of "you're really quite seriously not helping" is effectively communicated?
Tl;dr- Let family in the tiniest bit on my ED and now they expect full control over my body with no protest. How can I calm them down and get them to see me as an actual human again?
Can fit in my old pair of pants
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Aug 30 09:51:07 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50bsrk/can_fit_in_my_old_pair_of_pants/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] Being hospitalized
/u/negativeraisins [5'0" | 69 lb | 14.19 | -53 lb | FTM]
Created: Tue Aug 30 09:28:21 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50bokh/being_hospitalized/
---
The good news is that I managed to get through all the slews of doctors, psychologists, etc. without having them think I have an ED.
The bad news is that I'm still being hospitalized for major weight loss.
The thing is health-wise, my vitals are fine, I don't have any problems/symptoms beyond a low heart rate, (to their knowledge) I've been maintaining at 70 pounds and not losing more weight, and no ED, so I'm... Essentially being hospitalized for having a small appetite and being underweight. Excellent.
Do naturally underweight people with small appetites get hospitalized too? Because at this point, this is just how I eat. I *know people* who naturally eat how much I eat or even less, and they're sure as hell not being hospitalized. I guess it's because of the weight loss, but, again, to them I've been maintaining the past week.
The greatest part is that they're not releasing based on how much weight I gain, they're releasing based on getting my calories back up to a "normal" number and eating "normal" amounts, so I can't fake anything. Brilliant.
Geez, if I gained 50 in a year until I was 10 pounds *over*weight would they forcibly hospitalize me? I doubt it. This double standard is very much frustrating me.
School's starting, too. And I haven't been able to study for standardized tests.
I'm past being scared of gaining weight (although once the scale starts going up I'm going to have to hide all my anxiety attacks lmao they think I'm fine with gaining), at this point I'm pissed.
[Tip] Get back on the scale and start working towards your goals again.
/u/HowToBeAsian25 [5'3.5 |115lbs |19.78 |-19 | F]
Created: Tue Aug 30 09:10:25 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50blf1/get_back_on_the_scale_and_start_working_towards/
---
Getting on the scale, for me, is similar to checking your bank account.
If you don't want to check your account, it means that you probably should. Nonexistent self discipline and eating disorders go hand in hand. The reason you (and I), lack self discipline is because we value instant gratification. The reason we're willing to lose weight in an unhealthy way is for instant gratification. Don't beat yourself up too hard for not being able to turn down whatever it was that you were unable to say no to yesterday, it's part of the disorder IMO.
The best way I've found to get back into the mindset of restricting is drinking a ton of water (and green tea), many people on this sub will agree with me on that one, it's basically common knowledge. And to do whatever means necessary to slowly start shrinking your stomach. I can't really just fast for 24 hours after a week+ long binder, that's the surest way to lead to a binge for me.
Start by skipping a meal, opting for a healthier alternative, and pushing yourself to see how long you can go, even if it's just another half hour or so. You'll find that it gets easier and easier, but the cravings will hit you with a vengeance (as it does with most people). With that being said, be extra intuitive to your triggers and finding ways to avoid them.
Hah, sorry guys. I needed to type that out probably more for myself than for anyone else. So if it doesn't connect well, it's because it was a train of thought that just "blahed" onto the paper.
Good luck everybody
[Thinspo] Found this NSFW Thinspo on r/BDSMGW
/u/supersizetrainwreck [5'9 | CW 130.7lb | 18.95 | F]
Created: Tue Aug 30 09:02:45 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50bk18/found_this_nsfw_thinspo_on_rbdsmgw/
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https://imgur.com/a/m5Agn#a2IyPg0
[Meme/Humor] Binge Jenga
/u/SixForMySorrow [5'10 | 125 | 17.5 | -20 | F]
Created: Tue Aug 30 08:04:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50b9xz/binge_jenga/
---
http://i.imgur.com/R0ySNtP.jpg
[Goal] Something kinda awesome happened
/u/FaithHopeTrick [5'7 | CW 123 GW 119 |19.20 | -32lbs | F]
Created: Tue Aug 30 07:53:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50b7zu/something_kinda_awesome_happened/
---
After burgergate (where I may or may not have consumed 6 quorn burgers, 3 buns, lots of crisps and several cocktails) I jumped right back to restricting and water weight has almost all gone. I'm only 1lbs up from Friday.
Today I get dressed and look in the mirror and I see it, a teeny, tiny, little thigh gap. It's not big enough to be worthy of a photo but it is there. Even with my stupid inward facing knees. SO motivated to keep going! Wouldn't have got here without y'all x
[Thinspo] [thinspo] keds
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Aug 30 07:04:19 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50b026/thinspo_keds/
---
https://i.reddituploads.com/0de2920c3ab84278afacaa67e98f0c3d?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=dd6a51995f0883e83eddd368abc1933a
[Discussion] Can we make a low cal recipes thread please?
/u/lightfeathers
Created: Tue Aug 30 06:43:30 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50awvx/can_we_make_a_low_cal_recipes_thread_please/
---
I'm back to restricting to under 600 cals for this week. Can you guys share your low cal recipes?
I'm horrible at cooking and most of my food tastes bland as well so this will be a ton of help! ❤
On mobile, can't flair :(
Edit: thank you guys!!! These are all great :)
[Discussion] Self-care and Beauty Q+A August 30, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Tue Aug 30 06:02:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50aqzz/selfcare_and_beauty_qa_august_30_2016/
---
Eating disorders are real, complex, and devastating conditions that can have serious consequences for physical health. Use this thread to discuss harm reduction and beauty tips, plus suggestions on how to build back up the physical self before and after engaging in disordered behaviors.
Please be wary of false advice and information. Be sure to research the facts before taking anyone's advice, no matter who they are. Remember that diagnosing members is unacceptable. **Anyone looking for medical guidance should seek the opinion of a medically licensed professional.**
*****
^Self-care ^and ^beauty ^threads ^are ^posted ^every ^Tuesday.
^Have ^any ^questions ^or ^concerns? ^Comment ^below, ^or [^PM ^the ^mods.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FproED)
[Goal] I'm gonna weigh myself.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Aug 30 05:47:23 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50aoyo/im_gonna_weigh_myself/
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[deleted]
[Discussion] How much do you lose, if any, overnight?
/u/celestulle [173cm | 54.1kg | BMI 17.87 | Weight Lost 7.8kg | Gender F]
Created: Tue Aug 30 05:29:06 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50amnh/how_much_do_you_lose_if_any_overnight/
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I guess I just wanna know :)
P.S. I'm new here - will input flair once I work out how! Sorry :S
[Other] Heart of Chambers - Beach House
/u/turtle4president [5'2" | 106.2 | 20.12 | F/20]
Created: Tue Aug 30 05:10:03 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50akfu/heart_of_chambers_beach_house/
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https://youtu.be/DNQ97P0rQk8
[Rant/Rave] "you were so skinny."
/u/TeaCupGirl [5'8" | CW 124.8lbs | 19 | -15.2lbs |]
Created: Tue Aug 30 04:49:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50ai6d/you_were_so_skinny/
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Last night I asked my boyfriend of almost 3 years (who I met online) what his happiest memory of us was. He said, after some deliberation, it was the first time he saw me in person when I came to visit him, as I was walking past security.
I asked him what he thought of how I looked, if I looked like he thought I would. He said " You were so skinny." Now, he said that sadly. I know he didn't like it. But all I can think of
is that girl, 20 years old, 5'8" with pale skin and a long-sleeved black lace dress, 105 pounds. Like a doll.
I'll never be 20 again
But I can be that 105 pound girl in a black lace dress, floating though the world on tiny, pale legs.
[Rant/Rave] Yeahhh Im not gonna get rid of this bloat/water weight before I go on my mini break.
/u/smokesanddietcokes [<3 ]
Created: Tue Aug 30 04:46:32 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50aht9/yeahhh_im_not_gonna_get_rid_of_this_bloatwater/
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No change this morning from yesterday, I can't see all this going down within less than 2 days.
Fuck it though. This vacation isn't the be all and end all, I guess. None of the friends I'm seeing will care - all besides two are obese, and the two that arn't are my partner (who got with me when I was obese anyway) and a friends partner - and his partner IS obese.
Like I wanted to look really nice for them. They are amazing people and I don't get to see them often (my own partner excluded in that, obviously!). But they literally will not give an iota of a shit.
I give a shit. I give so many fucking shits. I hate myself. I hate this body. I hate looking flabby and bloated. I wanted to be 88lbs for this but instead I am nearing on 100lbs (my highest weight in a long time) and bloated and flabby as hell on top. The amount of shits I give may as well be infinite. *Just so many shits are being given right now*.
But I am reminding myself that they wont. And I want to enjoy this. God guys I want to enjoy this SO badly, I havn't had a break away for over 10 years. Just this house and the same routine day in, day out. Washing and cleaning and sleeping and eating and stress.
You guys know what I REALLY want to do right now? I want to eat moderately and healthily today and tomorrow - lowish carb, perhaps to my TDEE, get all my stuff packed without added stress. Then, I want to go on the mini-break and join in with all the calorific meals out guilt free. The restaurants, the take-outs, the snacks with all the friends I love. Go to all the parties and enjoy the cosplayers, buy my souvenirs. Enjoy the food, the friends, on my first mini-break away in over 10 years.
Then I want to come back and get back to my normal routine and restrict and fast and at least get down to 95lbs again.
I think that's whats going to end up happening.. I have so much packing to do and I've ignored it all trying to figure out how to at least lose this bloat and water weight. I havn't had a shower in like three days because I have been so stressed about looking nice for this event. So.. fuck it, right?
But I feel like I am utterly failing my ED. Failing *at* it, but also failing *it*, as if it were a person.
I feel like a fraud even posting here, to all you lovely, dainty, skinny, strong-willed people with your tiny BMI numbers in your flairs. Then fat old me, planning to eat normally and then overeat for 4 fucking days when I've already been such a pig the last month or so and put on so much weight. The ONLY redeeming thing about that is that at least I kept up with the weight training. Some of that mass MUST be muscle, right? Must be.. even just a tiny fraction.
Look at the excuses I am making for myself.
Coming back from the mini-break will be a new start - not a 'new start' like I've been saying to myself every week for the past few months, because my focus was always this mini-break (yeah it really is that important to me). And I think anticipating it stressed me out and messed me up and emotional eating and stress and so forth. Lets see what happens when it's all over...
[Thinspo] Tuesday Thinspo: Thin always looks better: Dressup with some reverse thinspo
/u/dbishop22
Created: Tue Aug 30 03:25:43 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50a8zm/tuesday_thinspo_thin_always_looks_better_dressup/
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https://imgur.com/a/itoq8
[Rant/Rave] You guys will get it
/u/Superderg
Created: Mon Aug 29 22:45:33 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/509dw2/you_guys_will_get_it/
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I'm laying in bed crying. I didn't actually go over my goal of 1470 calories today (I know even that is gross, but it's been a long week). But just pain washing over me. I'll give you a short version of my current love life - I'm kind of in love with my exbf who is my current best friend. We still sleep together and are basically in an open relationship. Except last time we hung out he went all weird about it and blatantly said he doesn't Want to be with me. So things have felt weird since then. We've barely talked this week. I've felt shitty and rejected and compensated with a binge and being content with my minimum calorie requirement to lose weight rather than heavy restrictions. Tonight we talked a bit, it felt like a punch. He said were good and everything is Normal. I feel like shit. I feel ugly and rejected.
I have a huge family and am close with most of my siblings. None know about the reappearance or ever existence of my ed, mostly because I've never gotten down to even a healthy weight. My older brother, B, is in med school. I talk to him the most. We talk a lot. He's been away all summer but we're planning a catch up night with wine for next week. My ed only resurfaced 41 days ago (got back to tracking on mfp). I sort of want to talk to him about it, but I also don't. I mean, I am classified as an obese bmi at 32. Like I need to lose 50lbs. That's a lot of weight to even be in healthy range. It's stressful. I feel alone and rejected and like I should stop holding out hope for this guy and I should get my head in order and I'll never find love until I'm skinny. And I should stop being so lax on myself and should restrict harder to get to my goals faster. Ugh. Sorry for the Massive vent just needed it out there.
Sorry can't flair on mobile!
[Help] May be a stupid question, but vaping...
/u/SomeoneCoolerThanYou [5'5" | CW fat | -5 | GW 120 lbs | F]
Created: Mon Aug 29 22:06:11 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5098kw/may_be_a_stupid_question_but_vaping/
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Has anyone had any success in fighting cravings by vaping? I know nicotine is an appetite suppressant, so I plan on getting juice with a fairly high concentration, but my problem with food has always been the taste. I don't give a shit about feeling full; I want to TASTE flavors.
I don't know, I'm turning 18 on Thursday and hoping this will help me out.
[Rant/Rave] Why do I keep doing this to myself?
/u/turtle4president [5'2" | 106.2 | 20.12 | F/20]
Created: Mon Aug 29 21:33:05 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5093sn/why_do_i_keep_doing_this_to_myself/
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flair as rant please
Tldr: I'm basically a massive failure
I just need to let it out. No one understands except you honeys.
My budget is 1009cals/day. Expected to lose 1.5lbs a week. Have been gaining? Period starts tomorrow. And (sorry, gross) I was hella constipated from thurs-Sunday while scale was reading 110lbs (panic ensued).
this morn I shit out a whole 12-incher and it was awesome, relieving... i felt EMPTY. Was fist pumping my whole drive to work.
Only had like 338cals until dinner. Weighed myself when I got home from work, about 7pm and it read 106. Was genuinely happy with myself. Felt small. Plans were a boca burger and an egg white omelette w/ mushrooms (~125cals) for dinner.
BF and I instead arranged to have pasta at his friend's for dinner. Rationed, "still have about ~600something cals left in my budget, should be golden!" Arrived to friend's at 9pm..... Was suddenly famished.
Dinner was whole wheat penne with Italian sausage and some Vermont cheddar cheese sauce and mushrooms and red peppers and probably olive oil and other scary things.
IDFK HOW MUCH I ATE...... Was fucking staaaaarving. didn't hold back. First had my bowl (granted, my bf's friend gave me and his gf a smaller bowl each because "girl portions")....... but then I ate half of his GF's bowl (she wasn't feeling well). I went ham. Wtf is wrong with me.
I have no idea how much I ate. Probably at least 2.5cups of this pasta. I'm an idiot and I feel so sad and stupid.
Just stab me in the face with a fork, please
[Rant/Rave] God damn alcohol
/u/dabriela [5'7 | fat | -41lbs | F]
Created: Mon Aug 29 20:54:00 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/508xwh/god_damn_alcohol/
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So, I'm a gigantic idiot and I don't know what I was thinking and the other day I bought a 30 rack of beer. The past few nights I've been drinking it like a mad woman, averaging anywhere between 6-9 drinks a night. Then, the alcohol will make me think its perfectly ok to do something more stupid like eat something late at night, especially carbs like those microwave mac & cheese bowls.
I feel so awful and panicky when I think about it. I had been doing *so* well, feeling so great about myself. I lost like 5lbs in the past week and now I'm too scared to even step on the scale because I know I'm gonna want to just throw up and die right there because I gained it all back. I guess I just have to finish this beer and commit myself to not drinking unless I'm with my boyfriend. Ugh, I hate college.
PS sorry for the rant, I'm a little drunk and I keep looking at my disgusting arms and cringing
[Rant/Rave] Mad at myself
/u/Jackysuave [5'4" | 136 | 23.34 | F]
Created: Mon Aug 29 20:22:01 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/508sxs/mad_at_myself/
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Binge binge binge.
Nothing is worse than failing yourself, right? I was losing weight all fine without feeling hungry and whatnot then got super excited and managed to eat so much food in one sitting without even acknowledging what I was doing. I'm now in tons of pains and trying not to cry cause I know the scale is going to say some bizarre number in the morning. I want to look good for my favorite band in two weeks and obviously that won't happen.
I can't do anything right ever.
[Help] (TW!) I feel like cutting myself after 2 months clean.
/u/kpatable [5'9" | 125.4 | 18.2/18.5 | -21.9 | F]
Created: Mon Aug 29 20:11:48 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/508rbx/tw_i_feel_like_cutting_myself_after_2_months_clean/
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I know this isn't directly relevant to the subject of this sub... But this sub is usually more supportive and responsive than subs dedicated to self harm and stuff.
Anyway, as the title says, I really feel like cutting myself after 2 months clean. Since I threw out my razors, I hadn't yet felt the urge as strongly as I do now. I just feel like I've reached my *limit*, you know? I feel like I've done all I can do, and it's not working. I don't have anyone in my meatspace life I can reach out to about this, but I need help with this. Because I've reached my limit. I can't cope with this pain alone right now.
[Help] About that insomnia...
/u/throwawaynm88 [Height 5'3.5"| CW 114.6 lbs| BMI 20| SW 125 lbs| GW 100 lbs]
Created: Mon Aug 29 19:45:17 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/508n9c/about_that_insomnia/
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I had this horrible insomnia last night.. the night started normally, I was asleep by 11:30, but I woke up at 1 AM in pain, with muscle twitching, so hungry, and I was awake until 4:30, and up with my kids at 6. I tried to nap today but still kept waking up every 30 minutes. Yesterday I only had around 650 calories, so I know that's why.. I think I need to go for walks on the weekend so I can have 1000 calories then too..
Any other tips for sleep? I use blue blocking computer software, and take melatonin before bed.. But I'm so hungry and in pain.. I tell myself that's good, that's the fat shrinking.. but I NEED sleep with two young kids to take care of on my own. I know increasing calories would help, but 1000 is already so much..
Please share any tips you might have!! Thanks!
[Rant/Rave] I am in crisis omg
/u/honeytarte [5'5" | CW: 119 | GW: 105 | -25 |]
Created: Mon Aug 29 19:43:22 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/508my6/i_am_in_crisis_omg/
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I binged on Thursday, because I all of a sudden decided I wanted to just stop losing and maintain at 120. and then I was like, wtf? No I don't?? and then Friday I tried to do 900 and then I was like, wtf am I doing I have hurt my body I should recover and then I googled how to recover and everything was like, eat 3000 calories a day and my dumb-ass bingey brain was like, yea okay that's a great idea. So I did that. And on Saturday I was like, what the actual fuck was I thinking I still want to get to my goal weight let's fast. So I fasted. And then yesterday's me was like, yea but not that fast, and ate 1200 calories. And today's me was once again like, You have damaged your body, sweet soul, go ahead and eat. Extreme hunger. Reactive eating. Listen to your body.
And now here I am, post binge, so fucking conflicted and upset and confused and lost.
The main problem here (I have determined) is that I don't know what I fucking want. I was fucking perfect (or damn near perfect) for like 2 whole months because I knew what I wanted (UGW!!) and I was fucking doing it. And now I'm at 119 (or I was lol not anymore I can assure you of that) and I didn't hate myself so much and I was like, dude maybe I'll just maintain here.
It's that stupid word, maybe. I am so completely aware that the only thing that's making me binge like this is the fact that I'm not 100% cemented into any one goal. I basically have 3 plans in front of me:
1) Keep restricting/fasting and get to UGW. Maintain there.
2) Just maintain here lol it'll be fine. You won't be perfect but you won't hate yourself.
3) "recover," whatever the fuck that means. (This one's probably just an excuse from my bingey-brain to binge, because I'm not even underweight and as much as all the recovery pages say, YES THE GUIDELINES APPLY TO YOU, I'm like lol nah the guidelines don't apply to me.
I've made an appointment with the counseling center at my college because I just need somebody to talk to and I'm tired of using my boyfriend as emotional support all the fucking time, even though he says he doesn't mind and that's what he's here for and I know they'll probably be like, REcovERY but we'll see how it goes.
TL;DR: I'm soo so fucking upset with myself and conflicted and I actually don't know what I want and as long as I don't know what I fucking want I'm going to keep binging. Thanks for reading lol please kill me.
[Help] Gaining on 1000 cal a day?!
/u/throwaway03199519 [5'6 | CW 119.4 | GW 110| 19.35| -16.6 | F]
Created: Mon Aug 29 19:34:44 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/508lma/gaining_on_1000_cal_a_day/
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So for the past few days ive tried upping my intake to 900-1000 cal a day so i dont feel so sluggish (and so my boyfriend kind of gets off my case) but my weight has been going up instead! i messed up a few days ago and had 1300 but the last few days ive been at 1000 or under. My TDEE is somewhere around 1500-1600 cal if im a potato, but ive been biking a bit to places around campus so i thought that should help.
I was around 118 when i was weighed on thursday and ive ballooned up to 121ish. Is this all water weight or what?! SOMEONE HELP! ive kinda been panicking but i keep trying to remind myself that with the amount im eating, i HAVE to be losing weight still..right?
[Discussion] Anyone eat over 1000 calories and still lose weight?
/u/throwawaynm88 [Height 5'3.5"| CW 114.6 lbs| BMI 20| SW 125 lbs| GW 100 lbs]
Created: Mon Aug 29 19:33:02 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/508lcx/anyone_eat_over_1000_calories_and_still_lose/
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I stick to 900-1000 calories a day, but I see 1200 being recommended a lot. I don't know if loss would be as rapid? I'm too anxious to try this myself until my weight hits my goal, but I'm interested to hear if anyone does eat more than 1000.
[Rant/Rave] Starting a two day fast tomorrow
/u/NerdBird49 [5'6" | CW: 140.4 lbs | GW: 130 lbs | UGW: 116 lbs | F | 22.75]
Created: Mon Aug 29 19:23:05 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/508jst/starting_a_two_day_fast_tomorrow/
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The past weekend and today have been terrible for me. I got down to my lowest weight of 142.6 on Friday, and I was up to 145.4 this morning. :( I was doing okay today, until I came home and there was pizza on the counter. As soon as I started eating it, I felt disgusted with myself and purged it. That's the first time I purged anything, and I don't want that to become a normal thing. I need to get back in control of my eating, so I decided to fast Tuesday and Wednesday. I'm mainly posting this to hold myself accountable. And I just need some love and support. <3
[Rant/Rave] [Rant] Ugh... I just talked myself out of a binge... Kind of...
/u/presidentkennady [5'3'' | too fucking gross | too damn high | f]
Created: Mon Aug 29 19:21:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/508jii/rant_ugh_i_just_talked_myself_out_of_a_binge_kind/
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Hey, guys. To begin, I'd just like to say it's really nice to have this community to rant to about this kind of frustration. It's nice to feel safe.
So I came home from rehearsal for this stupid pageant I don't even want to do and I ate a bowl of cabbage and salt with ACV (another user posted it here, it's awesome! Thanks to whoever posted that!). Like I felt stuffed. But then I just wanted some hummus - so I'm like, sure, fucking hummus with some hot sauce, let's do this shit.
So I eat that with maybe more wheat thins than I should have but its not that bad. Suddenly my mom busts in, "There's mushroom ravioli in the fridge, eat it before it gets bad." Obviously pissed I'm eating hummus instead of the leftover Italian food.
Mushroom ravioli is literally my favorite food, ever.
I have this thing built into me about not wasting food.
I just ate all of the calories. ALL THE CALORIES
FUUUUUUCCCCCKKKKKK GOD DAMN PISS SHIT TODAY HAS SUCKED AND I HATE FOOD, Y'ALL.
[Discussion] Fasting advice: What to do about the headaches?
/u/Countdown2Control [5'4" | 136 | 23.8 | -40 |M]
Created: Mon Aug 29 19:07:28 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/508hib/fasting_advice_what_to_do_about_the_headaches/
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The tension headaches are annoying and the pill popping on an empty stomach is bad idea.
Any advice?
[Meme/Humor] Me_irl during a binge
/u/venetianrosequartz [5'6"|CW 140|HW 153|LW 130|GW 135|UGW 112|WL -13| BMI 22.6|Female]
Created: Mon Aug 29 18:53:44 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/508ff2/me_irl_during_a_binge/
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http://i.imgur.com/jk2fx9k.jpg
[Rant/Rave] When did it stop becoming a diet and became self harm? (Extreme trigger warning)
/u/fourfoldcat [5'4 | 113 |19.4 | -32 | F]
Created: Mon Aug 29 18:38:12 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/508ctf/when_did_it_stop_becoming_a_diet_and_became_self/
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At this point I'm well aware of how dangerous living off of two cups of coffee a day is, but I like that. I want to hurt. I want to pass out for exhaustion. I want to mess my insides up so bad I can never eat solid food again. I want to feel myself dying.
This used to be such a positive experience for me. I loved watching the numbers go down and feeling my confidence boost. Now, I just want them to keep going down until I don't exist. How do I find happiness in this again?
[Goal] today was supposed to be a fast day.
/u/thelonelykitten_
Created: Mon Aug 29 18:17:48 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5089h0/today_was_supposed_to_be_a_fast_day/
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I was supposed to fast today but I ended up snacking all day at work then I came home and ate a burrito. I'll do better tomorrow. I won't eat, I'll stick to Diet Coke and water all day.
[Rant/Rave] I slept well for the first time in weeks
/u/sveltevelvet [5"8 | GW: 105-115 | -16 lbs | 18F]
Created: Mon Aug 29 18:01:45 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5086r5/i_slept_well_for_the_first_time_in_weeks/
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Yesterday was meant to be a fast day, and at one point, I knew that I had to eat something. I was ravenous and didn't want to eat 400 cals of cookies. I took my favourite foods that I had left: a head of broccoli, asparagus, spinach, strawberries and a grapefruit. I counted the calories before I prepared them and ate them. It was only 400 calories, but I felt so guilty afterwards.
An hour later I felt tired and went to sleep. Like, a normal tired, sleepy and calm, not anxious and mentally strained tired.
Lately even when I'm not fasting, if I eat my daily calories and still feel hungry, I can't sleep, and my life just feels like a string of consciousness, full of thoughts about what I'm going to eat, how much I hate myself.
Im not going to let myself eat unctrollably like that again, but eating a lot at once helped me sleep so peacefully. I needed that night of sleep so badly. I hate sacrificing sleep for hunger lol.
[Rant/Rave] I can't do this "recovery" anymore.
/u/peanutbutteredbanana
Created: Mon Aug 29 17:55:49 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5085s0/i_cant_do_this_recovery_anymore/
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I guess I was never really recovering, just maintaining. Although I guess I considered eating that many calories as steps towards recovery. But it's just too hard on me mentally :( I've been eating 1200 calories maybe (before exercise) and the scales only been going up!! I went from 95 to 99 and it hasn't went back down. This is wrecking my mind even more. I can't do this anymore, I'm going to fast for 5 days to put a dent in all the progress I've missed out on. I want to be 85 pounds and then everything will be okay. I just want to be thin again.
[Rant/Rave] I know we've done this thread before but - interesting books about ED?
/u/mckenziemudkip [5'3 | CW:115(-15) GW:88 | BMI 20.93| F/20]
Created: Mon Aug 29 17:26:42 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5080s5/i_know_weve_done_this_thread_before_but/
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The only thing I've read is Winter Girls.
When I read, I'm so absorbed, I don't think of food much. And especially reading about ED.. it's almost.. eh, hate the word for this, but inspiring?
Lemme know of any suggestions.
[Help] How to commit to my fasting/restricting while living with my husband?
/u/punkinwunkin
Created: Mon Aug 29 16:10:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/507nqm/how_to_commit_to_my_fastingrestricting_while/
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(Literally my first Reddit post and a throwaway. Hope I'm doing this correctly)
When you are married and/or live with a significant other, how can you hide that you don't want to eat meals with them? Or that you just "aren't hungry" or "already ate" when your husband is always looking out for you. And I mean that in a caring, making sure his partner is ok, kind of way.
I want to get back to the fasting/restricting that I miss and NEED but I don't think I can pull it off under the same roof as someone.
Do I just not eat while I'm at work and feign late lunches when I get home?
Looking for advice on keeping my habits under wraps. Thanks!
[Tip] Very weird and slightly unusual nsfw tip
/u/eldariya [6'3"/190CM | CW:148/67KG | GW: 130/58KG | 17.4 | -118/53KG | M]
Created: Mon Aug 29 15:24:55 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/507fgz/very_weird_and_slightly_unusual_nsfw_tip/
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lmao well I was experimenting with my boyfriend (i'm low key kinky don't judge lmao) anyway we got some flavoured lube and it tasted surprisingly good like I kept on eating it off him and it tastes great, I mean so did he but it tasted really nice.
Turns out it's like super super low in calories / almost 0 calories and tasty so I've been just putting it in a small container and having like a small spoon whenever I want lmfao.
TL;DR: FLAVOURED LUBE TASTES GREAT AND IS LIKE NO CALORIES LMFAO
[Tip] [Tip] Use ground flax (or chia) and water as a vegan low-cal substitute for eggs when cooking and baking
/u/Noroeste [5'6 | can fit in a rowboat | F]
Created: Mon Aug 29 15:20:22 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/507eov/tip_use_ground_flax_or_chia_and_water_as_a_vegan/
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http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-PkoYomhuL8Y/UA9d_-gn4tI/AAAAAAAAGxM/h0AyjfoaFnQ/s1600/flax+vs+egg+nutrition+facts+comparison+chart+calories+fat+protein.jpg
[Help] road trip / when daily routine isn't possible...
/u/texas_native [5'6" | 118 | 19.05 | F]
Created: Mon Aug 29 15:00:16 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/507ats/road_trip_when_daily_routine_isnt_possible/
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hi all, i know i've seen a few posts about vacations / trips before, but thought i would open it up to maybe a bigger conversation. so much of this ED, for me, is about feeling comfortable / in control of my routine. having the same things to eat every day, doing the same amount of exercise, etc. so, wondering how you all cope when that's not possible? i'm about to be on the road for about 9 days, less in control of my meals / snacks / exercise routine. driving a lot. trying to plan ahead, but feeling anxiety creep up a little bit. how do you guys deal with these situations? is there any planning you do ahead of time? i don't know that there's an answer to this...
[Discussion] DAE not update their flair accurately?
/u/Alexa1p [5'5'' | 110 | 18 | -10.7 | F]
Created: Mon Aug 29 14:51:27 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50797s/dae_not_update_their_flair_accurately/
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For the past few days I've weighed in at 109-110, but I'm so damn afraid of a binge and gaining weight that I haven't updated my flair. Like, I'm terrified of having to increase my weight on here because then I'd feel like a huge fatass. I'd rather be cautious about moving it down, is this just me?
[Rant/Rave] Just need to vent a bit
/u/pungentthrowaway [5'1" | CW: 154 | -13 | F]
Created: Mon Aug 29 14:15:41 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5072hp/just_need_to_vent_a_bit/
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My boyfriend isn't a feeder, but he's close. He prefers "curvy" women and doesn't seem to mind me at any weight no matter how big I've gotten. He also, if I'm not very specific, will bring me home extra food when he can, and it's gotten worse since I told him that I'm restricting. He went to pick us up dinner the other night from a nearby actually super healthy restaurant. I know they have those lindt truffles at the checkout and asked him to get me "a couple" (which means 2 right???) and he brought me home like 9. Naturally I ate all fucking 9 and what had been steady weight loss has now stalled for a couple days. It didn't start me off on some crazy binge or anything thank god, but sometimes I lowkey wish he was the type of guy who would trigger my restricting and not the opposite - someone that would be fine if we got fat together. I know if I didn't have an ED I would be so appreciative of this aspect of him and it's probably objectively a good thing, but that just makes me feel shittier for thinking this way :/
Thanks for reading and I hope you are all having a wonderful day my loves <3
[Tip] Anyone looking for another reason to avoid the dollar menu at fast food places?
/u/explodingrhinoceros [5'6.5" | CW: 170.4 | BMI: 27.1 | SW: 218.2 lbs | GW: 125 lbs | F]
Created: Mon Aug 29 14:02:07 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/506zym/anyone_looking_for_another_reason_to_avoid_the/
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I recommend you find out why McChicken is trending on Twitter and Facebook.
You probably won't want another one for some time. I know I won't.
[Discussion] Do you ever speculate how much less you'd weigh if you shaved off all of your hair?
/u/Noroeste [5'6 | can fit in a rowboat | F]
Created: Mon Aug 29 13:34:25 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/506uli/do_you_ever_speculate_how_much_less_youd_weigh_if/
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https://www.reddit.com/r/proED/comments/506uli/do_you_ever_speculate_how_much_less_youd_weigh_if/
[Rant/Rave] First day of School triggers
/u/stephanynotstokes [5'6 |Weight Lost: 70 lbs | F]
Created: Mon Aug 29 13:04:27 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/506opk/first_day_of_school_triggers/
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I lost about 20 pounds this summer, 70+ pounds over all and I was really excited to return to school. However, when I got to campus i saw nothing but girls who are way smaller than me walking around in shorts and tank tops and I felt little down. Im upset I weigh more than them but I know ill get there some day.
One a good note, my professor told me that I get prettier every semester she sees me. She knew me before I lost the weight and I guess she can tell the difference. SO that made me feel good.
Hope everyone else is doing well.
[Discussion] What do you always have in your fridge?
/u/thatonegirlfrommath [5'5" | 131.2 | 21.8 | F]
Created: Mon Aug 29 12:35:04 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/506j19/what_do_you_always_have_in_your_fridge/
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I've recently moved to my first "big girl" apartment with a full kitchen and am taking advantage of my big fridge. I always have a big plastic Tupperware jug full of iced coffee and one filled with either koolaid or iced tea. I also have a big Tupperware bowl of cabbage salad (posted about yesterday). What do y'all have?
[Other] She smirked, nibbling fruit off her plate, While her friends complained that they couldn’t lose weight.
/u/Noroeste [5'6 | can fit in a rowboat | F]
Created: Mon Aug 29 12:30:48 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/506i8u/she_smirked_nibbling_fruit_off_her_plate_while/
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http://i.imgur.com/gDpkBCF.png
[Discussion] Those of you who have recovered and then relapsed, how, if any, has your ED changed?
/u/BlackFlagWhiteSails [5'5" | 113.6 | 18.9 | F/23]
Created: Mon Aug 29 11:25:13 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5065kh/those_of_you_who_have_recovered_and_then_relapsed/
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I thought it'd be like slipping into a warm bath of water. Comforting. Familiar. The same.
But it's like meeting a childhood friend for coffee. You've both gone and done stuff and it's no longer the same. You say your platitudes, make small talk, ask about families. But it's awkward. clumsy. You don't know each other anymore and you can't pick right back up where you left off. Especially when you thought you'd said goodbye for good.
I guess two and half, almost three, years is a long time to have recovered to have a pretty bad relapse? I used to just restrict, restrict, restrict, but now I'll have some binges, and I'll go days without eating anything and only drinking tea. I just feel so... bad at having my ed. Like I can't even do that right. How about you guys? Anyone else in my situation or something similar?
[Thinspo] Charlotte Winslow transformation
/u/Noroeste [5'6 | can fit in a rowboat | F]
Created: Mon Aug 29 11:24:50 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5065hl/charlotte_winslow_transformation/
---
http://i.imgur.com/VqWa1cV.jpg
[Help] I lose all self control when I let myself eat. My stomach feels like a bottomless pit.
/u/smokesanddietcokes [<3 ]
Created: Mon Aug 29 11:12:04 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50632z/i_lose_all_self_control_when_i_let_myself_eat_my/
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So this morning I woke up having trouble not fasting.
I ended up making myself eat a yogurt, and it all went to shit.
Whenever I swap my mindset from 'restrict/fast' to 'eat freely', and then eat, I seem to lose control. I CANNOT eat moderately.
I get so hungry. My stomach feels so empty. I can eat something, and then feel hungry 30 minutes later.. not the type of hunger I can ignore.
My body doesn't seem to care about the normal rules, of what is filling and what is not. High protein, healthy fats.. doesn't matter, still hungry. Low cal, large volume? Doesn't matter, still hungry. Little and often? Hungry - often turns into every 30 mins. Less often, large meals? Still end up snacking, so fucking hungry. Nothing - I mean nothing - helps stops this hunger once I decide to 'let myself eat'. I'm so fed up of hearing about 'filling' foods because I just want to shake people and scream about it does *not* work. How *nothing* works with this feeling of hunger.
This is why I cannot even consider recovery right now. If I dared, I'd likely just binge and binge and binge and get obese again. I only have any self control when I keep my mindset to fasting and restricting.
I've heard of recovering anorexics going through periods of extreme hunger once they decide to eat more, and it's because of the damage they have done to their bodies and they need more calories to repair it. But A) I don't even know if I am anorexic or ever have been, I just know my eating is fucked up and B) I'm not underweight. Not close. There is no damage. There is no fucking reason for me to be this hungry except my disgusting lack of willpower.
Today since my earlier post I have eaten 2 yogurts, 1 bowl of cauliflower rice, 1 tin tuna, 1 packet quorn, salad, cherry tomatoes. Yep. On a day that is usually an easy as shit fast.. all because I decided to let myself eat.
Trying so hard not to grab the closest carby, high calorie things. I think my self control is present enough to stop that anyway. I feel so fucking stressed. Why does this happen? Why am I such a greedy fat fucking cow? I'm a failure.
[Rant/Rave] My scale is gone
/u/pcrnography [5'6" | -55 lbs | nb]
Created: Mon Aug 29 10:57:48 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/506086/my_scale_is_gone/
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I normally weigh myself everyday, and I was so good about restricting this weekend (Friday & Saturday usually turn into binges at the end) I was excited to see my weight. But it's gone. I have no idea where my mom moved it to and I can't ask because she doesn't know I use it. I can't look for it either because she took the day off. I don't know what to do
(on mobile, will flair later)
edit: FOUND IT!!! it was in the trash, hopefully this means she'll buy a new one
[Discussion] Daily Food Diary! August 29, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Mon Aug 29 10:02:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/505q48/daily_food_diary_august_29_2016/
---
This is a daily food diary thread for August 29, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
[Help] Getting tired of shakes almost all day..
/u/throwawaynm88 [Height 5'3.5"| CW 114.6 lbs| BMI 20| SW 125 lbs| GW 100 lbs]
Created: Mon Aug 29 09:53:50 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/505ohb/getting_tired_of_shakes_almost_all_day/
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I decided to allow myself fruit at breakfast with my shake since I've lost 10 lbs in 2 weeks.. I'm still having a shake for lunch and an afternoon snack, and then salad for dinner. I am getting really sick of the shakes though..
My plan has been to slowly ease into a raw vegan diet as I hit each of my goals.. the next would be a veggie lunch instead of shake at 110 lbs, and then at 105 a fruit/veggie snack instead of a shake in the afternoon.. and then at 100 maintain and work in things like nuts, seeds, etc... With the goal of eventually putting on some muscle but staying at a low weight and eating "raw until dinner" to maintain.
I'm afraid of binging because of how long I've been doing these shakes.. Plus, I'm not sure how long these goals will take now that my weight loss is slowing down.. Would there be harm in switching to all raw meals/snacks and staying at 900-1000 calories, or will I gain all the weight back? I'm so anxious about the idea but a part of me also wonders if I'd lose quicker than I am on the shakes.. since it would be just raw produce..
[Discussion] Binging, keto, nightmares, and being scared.
/u/canwefloat [5'5 | 112 | - 19 lbs | F]
Created: Mon Aug 29 09:08:49 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/505grg/binging_keto_nightmares_and_being_scared/
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First of all, I think about food probably 60% of the day, which is down from the usual 90% before I started keto a few months ago.
I'm still very focused on very specifically planning out my meals for optimum nutrition; making sure there's the right amount of fats, carbs, vitamins, etc. But it's different. Less frantic. I have been able to think about food clearly and without anxiety. I've been able to eat without thinking about calories occasionally. Which is very, very huge for me in a way I can not overstate. I've been dieting since I was 15.
(Which, as a side note, is deeply frustrating. NO ONE would be able to tell how much I think about food from the way I look. I look "normal". It's so frustrating. Food consumes the majority of my life and I look no different from someone who doesn't give it a second thought. Ugh, it's just utterly unfair)
Keto has helped me a lot. I eat two meals a day, and I haven't been under eating for a long time now. No weird fasts or unreasonable restricting . It's been highly enjoyable having energy and not being hungry all the time. I haven't gained or lost. I've been eating to satisfaction and still maintaining (mind you, not at my original goal weight).
Keto has replaced my ED's need for control. Instead of an unhealthy focus on fasts and restricting, I am focusing on recipes and ingredients. However, this means when I screw up on keto, I literally spiral out of control.
On Saturday I went to a party and had a glass of champagne, which was in my keto macros and would have been fine. However, something about the sugar in the drink made me feel like I couldn't stop. I had glass after glass. I even ate dinner before I went because parties never have keto food. And this one was no exception.
Something in me just snapped. I ate a brownie cookie, a slice of peach cobbler, 2 chicken nuggets, a piece of french toast pie, and a slice of breakfast cassrole. On top of having already eaten dinner. I decided I was 100% going back to keto the next day. Everything felt like it sucked. And it did. Everything sucked.
But nope. The next day I went to a soccer game with some friends, and we pregamed. I had a normal Coke (I never drink my calories, so this was crazy for me) with rum, a giant soft pretzel, and mint chocolate chip ice cream. This is *on top* of having two full meals earlier that day. Two. Full. Meals.
I looked in the mirror and was literally shocked. On keto I had grown to have a normal body image. I knew I looked normal and was growing to accept it. It stung, but I felt like I was going to be okay even if I didn't look perfect. The pit in my stomach when I looked at myself felt just a little weaker.
Now I looked huge. I literally felt like I grew outward.
I had a nightmare that night I went to a potluck and just binged and binged. I couldn't stop eating. I was growing fatter and fatter as the dream went on and I felt like I had lost all control. It felt so real. It felt scary and all of those old weird feelings before keto got kicked back up.
You guys, I'm scared. I'm scared keto didn't cure me. I'm scared a glass of champagne is the line between feeling normal and losing my mind for two days. I'm scared I can't go out to pizza with friends. I'm scared that if/when I get married, my wedding cake might trigger a binge. I'm scared my boyfriend said that the little pouch of pudge on my stomach is "normal" when I told him I was feeling insecure about it. I'm scared when someone brings in donuts to work.
I don't want to think about food anymore. I don't I don't I don't. I'm tired of this. I want to think about food normally. This is too much. I'm too scared to eat today.
[Goal] Had been without a scale for 2 weeks, actually lost 6lb, am now 138 at 6'1. Yaay.
/u/Chromalust [6'1 | CW: 138 | GW: Less | 26/mtF]
Created: Mon Aug 29 08:48:39 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/505d70/had_been_without_a_scale_for_2_weeks_actually/
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http://imgur.com/a/ccx9z
[Help] Weigh in question
/u/justputitdown [5'8" | 149 | 22.4 | 34.6 | F]
Created: Mon Aug 29 08:38:17 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/505bdp/weigh_in_question/
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I forgot to weigh in before breakfast today 😔 when this happens to you, do you subtract anything for the food and drink you ate, or do you just log it and accept it and figure it will balance out?
I weighed in at 153.2 today after a low intake day yesterday. For breakfast today I ate one egg, 0.25 oz cheese, 2 tbsp salsa, and 16 oz iced coffee with 0.25 cup 2% milk. I also had a little water with my pills this morning.
I think I should subtract between 0.2-0.5 lbs for breakfast, because 0.5 lbs = 8 oz, and I know I drank more iced coffee than that, not to mention food. Any advice would be super helpful! I'm getting really anxious about this, so I'm going to do some meditation to chill out.
Tl;dr: I ate breakfast before weighing in. Should I adjust my weigh-in number?
[Intro] I haven't done an official intro, so here it goes :)
/u/Phantomsgf [5'2" | 144lbs | GW:125 | -16 lbs |F]
Created: Mon Aug 29 08:32:28 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/505acs/i_havent_done_an_official_intro_so_here_it_goes/
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Hello, I've posted to the sub before but didn't actually make a proper intro.
I'm an animator and illustrator, living abroad with my SO.
I've been dealing with eating disorders since I was 13 (so 11 years in a few days... yeeey/s)
It stated with calorie counting and restricting, then binging and purging... I lost quite a bit of weight and you could tell I was sick. My hair fell down in chunks, I fainted at school and then there was a breaking point where I spent 2 weeks in which my stomach simply wouldn't take in any food.
They ran a bunch of medical tests on me but I wasn't diagnosed with an ED. My friends knew though and they started pressuring me to get better or they'd tell on me. Also, I could tell it was rubbing off on them and my (then) childhood best friend was heading down the same path, so I thought if I got better, she would too.
So I gained my weight back..and then some more. I no longer had any idea of how to eat like a "normal" person. My friend just kept on getting thinner and in the bottom of my heart, I envied her SO MUCH. people would constantly tell me how they were worried about HER and I was now the fat friend. I would constantly relapse, loose weight, gain weight, repeat.
After some years I got into therapy and told my therapist everything. She helped me stay ok for a while but my life has been so chaotic in the last 4 years, I stopped going to therapy, moved to different countries and relapsed multiple times. At least once a year.
Ended up in the ER multiple times. Still only to have doctors puzzled because they had no idea what was wrong (too fat for an ED I guess).
Fast forward to now... last year I gained the most weight and I started to notice how horrible I looked in my pictures. I couldn't take a picture without editing it afterwards. A month ago I got sick of it all. Sick of being fat, of not having control over what or how much I ate, of using food as a way of feeling better when in reality it only made me feel worse afterwards.
I am now living with my SO.. so I don't purge. I've been restricting for about a month and already losing it. I'm 3 kg away from my first goal weight, but like 10 from my ultimate goal.
I know restricting is bad for me. but I'd much rather starve myself than to feel like a sad excuse that needs food to feel happy. I want to be back to my old, fragile self.
[Goal] Halfway to my goal
/u/invincibletitan33 [5'4.5 | 50kg | 18.6 | F]
Created: Mon Aug 29 07:55:04 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50540u/halfway_to_my_goal/
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http://imgur.com/gallery/Ivkbu
[Meme/Humor] How I feel during a binge
/u/OperatingOnScientist [5'3 | 137lbs | 24.94 | F | UGW 110lbs]
Created: Mon Aug 29 07:43:53 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50528s/how_i_feel_during_a_binge/
---
http://imgur.com/fV66lw2
[Rant/Rave] Every. Fucking. Weekend.
/u/disbeetch [5'4'' | 144 | 24.72 | -24 | F]
Created: Mon Aug 29 07:26:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/504zki/every_fucking_weekend/
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http://imgur.com/1oLk6U2
[Goal] Getting back on track to start the school year right
/u/Hiyoheyyo
Created: Mon Aug 29 07:25:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/504zgh/getting_back_on_track_to_start_the_school_year/
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Had an apple, a price of 45cal toast, half a coffee, my ec stack and multivitamin. Feeling great and wearing a cute ass outfit!
[Help] Surprised with a beach trip this weekend, but not ready!!! And tips??
/u/stargatesg-7 [5"2 | 112 | -27 | GW 100]
Created: Mon Aug 29 06:44:31 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/504tfc/surprised_with_a_beach_trip_this_weekend_but_not/
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So my mom surprised me with a girls trip to the beach this weekend with my sisters. First time I've been to the beach in 4 years. I'm really scared. My weight Is down significantly, but not where I want it. I can hide the fat I don't like in my ab area with clothes. But can't do that in a bathing suit! I plan on losing 2 pounds this week for it. Any tips I can do to be slimmer and not bloated to look thinner by Friday? I weighed and was 110.5 this morning. If I can lose water weight or do something that gives the impression I am slimmer on Saturday, that would be great! Thanks proed!!
When I get to my computer I will add the flair. I'm on mobile. Thanks!
[Discussion] Weekly Stats Update! August 29, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Mon Aug 29 06:03:50 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/504o2n/weekly_stats_update_august_29_2016/
---
This is the weekly status thread for August 29, 2016.
The weekly status thread is to help motivate our users, and to eventually see how far they've come! Be it for weight loss, weight gain, or maintaining- everyone is welcome. Previous updates are archived [here.](http://www.reddit.com/r/proED/wiki/archives)
Please include the following information (with all necessary units of measurement):
* Height:
* Current weight (CW):
* Highest weight (HW):
* Lowest weight (LW):
* Goal weight (GW):
* Ultimate goal weight (UGW):
* Weight lost (WL):
* BMI: ([Use this to calculate your BMI](https://people.maths.ox.ac.uk/trefethen/bmi_calc.html))
* Age:
* Gender expression:
Here's a handy-dandy copy/paste of the above format:
* Height:
* CW:
* HW:
* LW:
* GW:
* UGW:
* WL:
* BMI:
* Age:
* Gender expression:
*****
^Status ^threads ^are ^posted ^every ^Monday.
^Have ^any ^questions ^or ^concerns? ^Comment ^below, ^or [^PM ^the ^mods.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FproED)
[Rant/Rave] Keep having to remind myself that I'm NOT restricting today.
/u/smokesanddietcokes [<3 ]
Created: Mon Aug 29 05:35:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/504kcs/keep_having_to_remind_myself_that_im_not/
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I'm going on a break away on Thursday, and I decided that instead of restricting before I go, I'll eat little portions and often of non-bloaty, shed-water-weighty type foods. I figured that in a 3 day time frame, this will make me look better than restricting anyway. I have a LOT of bloat to lose, and water weight to shed (advice on that always appreciated!)
But it's difficult to get out of the mindset today. Monday is usually *easy* fast day. I havn't eaten on Mondays for.. over a year? Bar ONE binge, which happened a couple of weeks ago. Anyway. It's back to easy again. Keep having to remind myself I really need to eat at some point :( I could just fast today anyway if it's so easy, but then I think, no, I think to beat the bloat I kind of need to keep my digestion moving. Get some foods that will help shed water too. Plus, I have a lot of packing to do and energy would be nice.
I normally have my calorie counting app open on my laptop, tablet and phone (just everywhere) but I've closed it all down and I hope that helps. Damn this is hard though.
[Thinspo] Monday morning thinspo: Tattoo/alternative
/u/dbishop22
Created: Mon Aug 29 05:30:22 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/504jr1/monday_morning_thinspo_tattooalternative/
---
https://imgur.com/a/ZrAhS
[Intro] Hello! I'm new
/u/venetianrosequartz [5'6"|CW 140|HW 153|LW 130|GW 135|UGW 112|WL -13| BMI 22.6|Female]
Created: Mon Aug 29 05:21:55 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/504iou/hello_im_new/
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I'm on mobile so sorry if this is formatted bad or if there are any typos, but hello, I'm Rose. I have been a long time lurker, but I am reaching out about my eating disorder which has been controlling my life. I just want to not hate myself for eating or being fat. I struggle with alternating heavy restricting and heavy binging (I don't purge). My current weight is 144.2 lbs and my goal weight is 115 lbs(I am five foot six). My heaviest weight was 152 lbs. If there's anything else I should share, please let me know so I can edit the post. Thank you for listening.
[Rant/Rave] lol where did my control go
/u/sewnp [168cm | GW:90lbs | NB]
Created: Mon Aug 29 04:44:21 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/504edc/lol_where_did_my_control_go/
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Hey? I haven't been posting in a while. I've been really depressed, like severely and I binge to feel something kind of it's complicated. Anyways, I need like a serious make over of my life if I want to not die soon. So what that means is..... I need help lmao. I just need a friend or something. But I doubt you'll like me. I'm fairly horrible haha. Pls if you feel any pity send me a message or something. Thank you so much.
[Mobile/Rant]
[Discussion] Interesting docu - UK actress stops being mindful of what she eats and gains 5 lbs a week.
/u/kpatable [5'9" | 125.4 | 18.2/18.5 | -21.9 | F]
Created: Mon Aug 29 04:39:10 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/504dtq/interesting_docu_uk_actress_stops_being_mindful/
---
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uJESSnW79j8
[Rant/Rave] Living with the in laws
/u/FaithHopeTrick [5'7 | CW 123 GW 119 |19.20 | -32lbs | F]
Created: Mon Aug 29 03:41:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5047ol/living_with_the_in_laws/
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I've moved in with my SO's parents for 3 weeks as it's got me out of my house which currently lacks a bathroom (and more importantly a flat floor to weigh myself!) and is closer to work.
To celebrate our arrival MIL made 2 cakes. 2. Both parents have asked lots of questions about my diet and health so I just decided to eat with them like a normal person for the weekend. They are healthy people. WCGW?
It's so nice after adulting for 10 years to go home and have someone cook for you, and have made the bed and offer to wash your clothes. I totally regressed to my fat former self and ate all the food that was offered
I've gained 3lbs in 2 days. I know - water weight. But GOD DAMN IT. 3 weeks left, must stay in control, cooking all my own food no matter what.
Just went downstairs and MIL tells me she's made us American Pancakes. Must stay polite. Must stay away from the pancakes.
This. Is. Hell.
[Help] Final fuck up
/u/420blazefiend [5'4'' | 119.05 | 19.83 | -22 | F]
Created: Mon Aug 29 00:41:41 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/503q7r/final_fuck_up/
---
I haven't posted or been active on this sub for a long time now. I've spent almost 2 months binging to the point of sickness everyday. I'm done.
I need to get my control back. I need to get my life organised. I need to fix this constant fuck up.
When I look at myself in the mirror I feel so uninspired though. I see what I look like and I just want to throw my life into the wind and fuck it all.
Does any one have any motivational tips that keep you on track? Once I find my control it's easy, but I've completely lost everything.
Edit: my weight details are incorrect, on phone so can't update. At the moment I am 132lbs and BMI 22
[Rant/Rave] This isnt quite ED related but I needed to rant
/u/Skinniminnie [5'3" | 157.0 lbs | 27.6 BMI | -12 lbs | F]
Created: Sun Aug 28 23:21:45 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/503gzx/this_isnt_quite_ed_related_but_i_needed_to_rant/
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I know its not really ED related but I needed to vent because until after this coming weekend, I cant say anything to anyone.
My ex has had most of my life belongings in his storage for the past year. I havent been able to get money to get it nor time to drive cross country myself. That being said, his fiance (woman he cheated on me with before we split) emailed me and let me know she's either putting my stuff in a new storage unit I will pay for or if I make an account with UPS, she'll bring it there to get mailed out. Now this sounds reasonable but just the tone and wording made her sound like a condescending cunt (pardon my French).
That being said I can NOT wait to get my things to me so that once that is done her, my ex, and his daughters mother, will all three get an identical email. It will be detailing his abusive past with me, everything hes done to me, everything hes hidden from his daughters mom, and about how even though hes 12 years older than me, had slept with me from the age of 16/almost 17 to the age of 20.
I have no problem ruining this relationship and in short ruining his life. I also know she is a SFC in the Army who gave a blowjob to a man not her husband while deployed in Afghanistan. She's divorced him now but I'm so angry and pissed off at being talked down to by a woman who couldn't help but take another woman's man knowing they were together and engaged.
My now husband doesnt understand why I'm so angry and why I want any type of revenge but I dont think he understands how awful this man made me feel prior to my current. My ex is a huge reason my ED is so strong and why I have never properly recovered.
Am I overreacting or am I justified?
[Meme/Humor] Sincerely, Fat Girl
/u/yousimperlikeaduck
Created: Sun Aug 28 22:12:17 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/503865/sincerely_fat_girl/
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https://i.redd.it/loj22fa8y8ix.png
[Help] Swollen tonsils
/u/burningthroughtime
Created: Sun Aug 28 21:58:02 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/50364g/swollen_tonsils/
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Do any of you have swollen tonsils? Last time I noticed they were swollen I freaked out and I didn't purge for about 8 months. I don't want a fat face. That only led to gaining weight. Recently I started purging again. I don't binge or anything anymore. I just cannot hold down the food even if it's less than a normal meal. For the past few days I've been focusing on my tonsils and they seem to be even more swollen than before. I read somewhere that this side effect is irreversible. What is your experience with swollen tonsils? Did they shrink for you at some point? If yes then what did you do to achieve that?
[Rant/Rave] When you play yourself
/u/yummmies [5'4" | 130 | -35 | F]
Created: Sun Aug 28 20:55:02 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/502x7b/when_you_play_yourself/
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I figured that once I reached my summer GW (130) I'll be able to have dinner with my parents for the last week I'm at home before college. Kinda like a going away thing, and I would magically be able to deal with any weight gain. So, I told them that I would have dinner with them every night this week.
Except now the water weight kicked in, and I'm 3 pounds up, and I don't wanna do this anymore, but they bought the food already and are too excited to cook for me, and I would feel bad if I let them down. I'm so full tonight, I don't know how much I ate. I'm not exercising this week, because they won't let me, and I don't know what to do. I haven't started packing, I just realized I don't fit into any of my clothes, and I don't know. My life feels like a mess.
Sorry this turned into a full rant.
[Goal] I just finished my fourth perfect day in a row, and I feel awesome about it.
/u/kpatable [5'9" | 125.4 | 18.2/18.5 | -21.9 | F]
Created: Sun Aug 28 20:37:43 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/502urm/i_just_finished_my_fourth_perfect_day_in_a_row/
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And, by "perfect," I just mean that I ate below my calorie goal for each day :] Since I have BED, this is a huge deal!!! And I resisted pizza TWO DAYS IN A ROW. Pizza is my **number one** binge food. I'm so proud of myself! I'm just excited and wanted to share. <3
[Meme/Humor] Fuck I've been binging on Taiwanese snacks. Goddamn these Carbs are delicious and disgusting. So here's some more eating in Anime/Manga
/u/shangen010 [Height:5' | CW:110/UGW:85 | BMI:22.6 | Weight Lost: -6| Gender:F]
Created: Sun Aug 28 19:50:42 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/502np6/fuck_ive_been_binging_on_taiwanese_snacks_goddamn/
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http://imgur.com/a/J34GX
[Discussion] What brand of scale do you use?
/u/explodingrhinoceros [5'6.5" | CW: 170.4 | BMI: 27.1 | SW: 218.2 lbs | GW: 125 lbs | F]
Created: Sun Aug 28 18:59:06 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/502fs2/what_brand_of_scale_do_you_use/
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Hey all, I need to get all kinds of serious as of late. Enough with the binges, I've been stuck for too long. I'm buckling down. ~1000 calories or less, much less carbs, and at least 45 minutes in the gym.
Anyway, what's a good scale to invest in? I've been eyeing the Fitbit Aria for some time now. Is there some cool high-tech thing that I don't know about yet?
[Rant/Rave] Frustrated
/u/WeighingDown [5'2" | 113 | 21.41 | F]
Created: Sun Aug 28 18:34:52 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/502c3h/frustrated/
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*can't flair, on mobile - will when I get home*
My boyfriend's parents came to visit us today. We planned on going out to eat at a place where I could order some vegetable soup. This in mind, I agreed to have chicken nuggets with my boyfriend earlier since it would still be in my calorie goal for the day. Fast forward to lunch and his parents decide they'd rather get fish and chips. I try to stay cool but I'm just so anxious the whole lunch and I spend the rest of the day feeling like shit. I ended up purging for the first time in months and it didn't feel like enough. I feel so guilty for eating those nuggets and I'm mad at myself for not trying to enjoy the lunch and I'm most upset about how much I went over my caloric goal for the day. I aim for an average of 800/day but I doubled that today. I just want to be thin.
*sigh*
[Rant/Rave] Hate to be back with such a negative post, but my last two weeks have been shit.
/u/mckenziemudkip [5'3 | CW:115(-15) GW:88 | BMI 20.93| F/20]
Created: Sun Aug 28 17:13:43 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/501zcf/hate_to_be_back_with_such_a_negative_post_but_my/
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I really need you guys more than ever.
I've gained six REAL pounds in two weeks. Binge after binge after binge. And I hate myself for it so much right now.
I was starting to feel kind of okay with myself. I had a thigh gap, chest bones, ribs. I felt good. But then I ate it all away because I felt like I could maybe be normal. Lol, no. I have no idea how to eat normal portions, or stop once I start.
All I can imagine is cutting off all my fat.
I'm so low.
Tomorrow I'm trying to fix this with a three day liquid fast, and then working back into restriction. I think I've stretched my stomach out x10.. I haven't showered in two days because I can't see myself naked right now.
Sorry for the negative post guys. I know there are plenty here. I just don't know what else to do when I feel this way..
[Rant/Rave] My boyfriend just broke up with me
/u/supersizetrainwreck [5'9 | CW 130.7lb | 18.95 | F]
Created: Sun Aug 28 16:24:48 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/501rsc/my_boyfriend_just_broke_up_with_me/
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Well he hasn't said that, but he said he doesn't consider us a couple anymore. We're friends and slightly more than roommates since he isn't asking me to move out and thinks we live together reasonably well? I don't really want to discuss it but I guess I had to put it out there and tell someone. I'm heart broken and lost and numb and empty and crumbling and I don't know what to do.
*Edit* We're not broken up, he came to me and told me that he does want to try and wants us to be a couple. I'm still not ok but at least we're still together?
Sitting on the windowsill.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Aug 28 16:24:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/501rog/sitting_on_the_windowsill/
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http://i.imgur.com/0t22yL0.jpg
[Help] FUCK FUCK FUCK. FUCK FUCK FUCK
/u/stephanynotstokes [5'6 |Weight Lost: 70 lbs | F]
Created: Sun Aug 28 15:50:44 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/501mb7/fuck_fuck_fuck_fuck_fuck_fuck/
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My mom found out that I was purging. She was acting strange and later I saw a thread of text between her and my dad where they talk about me purging. Fuck what am I going to do. Thank god I go back to school tmrw so I won't be home as much but oh my god things are about to get a whole lot harder for me.
[Discussion] Any other parents?
/u/throwawaynm88 [Height 5'3.5"| CW 114.6 lbs| BMI 20| SW 125 lbs| GW 100 lbs]
Created: Sun Aug 28 15:30:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/501j4p/any_other_parents/
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How do you handle family meals?
[Tip] Cabbage: a Love Story
/u/thatonegirlfrommath [5'5" | 131.2 | 21.8 | F]
Created: Sun Aug 28 15:27:27 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/501ik6/cabbage_a_love_story/
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A lot of people ignore this leafy green, and they would be doing themselves a huge disservice, especially if you're a member of the ED club. This super cheap veg can VASTLY improve your ability to restrict. Every other week, I go to the grocery store and get two heads of green cabbage. It's like maybe $3 and it'll last you for two weeks. Go home, rinse your cabbage, and cut into 4ths (keep one cabbage in the fridge for later, it'll last a week in the fridge before you even prep it). Get a mandolin greater and go to town grating your cabbage until you have a big ol'bowl of cabbage ribbons. I bought the biggest plastic tupperware bowl I could find with a lid on Amazon and just replace the cabbage as it begins to empty. I usually add black pepper and apple cider vinegar to the cabbage ribbons, but any vinegar will do. This helps preserve the cabbage and adds low cal flavor. You've now got your cabbage/slaw base that will last 2.5-3 weeks (if you haven't eaten it by then) and can go into so many dishes.
I often eat it alone, but it's also good with basically everything. I like putting chili or taco stuff in it (make a big batch of peppers, onions, beans, ground beef/turkey, tomatoes, and taco seasonings; you can find it in my meal prep post and it can easily be frozen and rethawed as needed). Sometimes (like right now) just put as much hot sauce as I can handle on it and go to town.
In conclusion, it's hella cheap, low-cal, filling, versatile, and easy to make. Plus FIBER FIBER FIBER.
[Meme/Humor] Me to my calorie counting app when it tells "You are 2800 calories over your daily budget"
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Aug 28 14:54:41 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/501d4z/me_to_my_calorie_counting_app_when_it_tells_you/
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https://38.media.tumblr.com/197b53131b69747fb56bc880f08392dd/tumblr_mg2e0sUlG01rmzrqmo1_500.gif
[Other] tfw when you had a massive binge and have to weigh yourself tomorrow
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Aug 28 14:40:34 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/501ant/tfw_when_you_had_a_massive_binge_and_have_to/
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[deleted]
[Discussion] Books for Fasting
/u/GoalsandGossip [5'10" | CW 181.4 | BMI 26 | GW 175 | UGW 125 | F |]
Created: Sun Aug 28 12:54:07 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/500ss3/books_for_fasting/
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So I was trying to read the Game of Thrones books while fasting but it talks so much about food 😭
I really want to find some books that talk about people in history who were disadvantaged to the point of not being able to eat. I am starting to really resent myself for over eating knowing that there are people in my city that don't even have enough to eat. I am going to bring what I would have eaten in a day down to the homeless camp near my house during the time I normally binge, hopefully that will motivate me to stick to my fast and change my habits.
But I'm just getting ranty. What books do you read while fasting?
[Rant/Rave] My husband said something to me...
/u/Skinniminnie [5'3" | 157.0 lbs | 27.6 BMI | -12 lbs | F]
Created: Sun Aug 28 11:43:26 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/500gi1/my_husband_said_something_to_me/
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So I'm sitting here on video chat with my husband talking about how excited I am to get the Halo Top ice cream. Just one of either birthday cake or lemon cake. Either one. And he responds with, "do you really need ice cream right now?"
I got mad. He's usually pretty positive body image centered and typically lets me do as I please when it comes to eating when he's not around (we're apart for work reasons) and because of my high weight I'm currently looking at losing my job. If you've seen my other post on it, you know what I'm talking about.
Anyways as we're arguing over this stupid ice cream because I want to taste something sweet that's not oatmeal for once and I don't have to feel bad about having a spoonful of, he throws in my face me eating a cinnabon on Friday evening.
Immediate reaction was to get extremely upset and he immediately shut down after I started yelling. Now we're sitting on video chat in silence but neither of us actually want to hang up because we miss each other...
Maybe he's right though, maybe I don't need the ice cream right now. I'm not anywhere near my first goal weight of 145...
[Discussion] Do you have something that triggers you to restrict more?
/u/throwawaynm88 [Height 5'3.5"| CW 114.6 lbs| BMI 20| SW 125 lbs| GW 100 lbs]
Created: Sun Aug 28 11:06:00 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/500a47/do_you_have_something_that_triggers_you_to/
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For me, it's my ex. We have a child together so he's going to be in my life a long time, but we are always on/off.. he's been rejecting me and it triggered my relapse completely.. but somehow restricting and losing weight makes me feel like I have control and numbs my feelings for him so much.
[Discussion] Different calories on exercise days?
/u/throwawaynm88 [Height 5'3.5"| CW 114.6 lbs| BMI 20| SW 125 lbs| GW 100 lbs]
Created: Sun Aug 28 11:03:00 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5009kd/different_calories_on_exercise_days/
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I have been eating 900-1000 calories a day every day but I'm considering doing 700-800 on weekends when I am not as active.. Anyone else do this? I would just mean cutting out my afternoon snack, probably doable.
[Thinspo] Is there a place I can post my reverse thinspo?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Aug 28 10:16:05 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/5001s1/is_there_a_place_i_can_post_my_reverse_thinspo/
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[deleted]
[Discussion] Daily Food Diary! August 28, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Sun Aug 28 10:02:22 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zzzib/daily_food_diary_august_28_2016/
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This is a daily food diary thread for August 28, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
[Help] Waist Measurements for Males?
/u/eldariya [6'3"/190CM | CW:148/67KG | GW: 130/58KG | 17.4 | -118/53KG | M]
Created: Sun Aug 28 08:45:28 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zznub/waist_measurements_for_males/
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Hi so I've been on this sub reddit from when I was like 230lbs to my current weight of 149lbs (I'm 6'3") and I've always been curious about other guys measurements. Like here is pretty much how I've been measurement wise is.
266lbs / 120kg = 46-38-47inches / 116-96-119
190lbs / 86kg = 37.5-29.5-39.5inch / 95-75-95
148lbs / 67kg = 35.5-27.5-35.5 / 90-69-90
Also is it realistic of me through waist training and losing more weight of me getting a 90-60-90 body as i'm almost 100% sure I can't lose anymore off my chest or hips but my waist is still a bit more elastic / can lose more.
[Rant/Rave] [Rant/Rave] Went over today's Calorie goal by almost 200.
/u/isolatedintrovert [155cm | CW: 46kg | GW: 40kg | 19.93 | F]
Created: Sun Aug 28 08:09:41 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zzioh/rantrave_went_over_todays_calorie_goal_by_almost/
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Now I feel so disappointed in myself that I feel like I need to be punished in some way.
I was doing so well. I was *under* my goal initially and then in the last stretch I caved to a craving and now I absolutely loathe myself.
(Note: Can't figure out how to add flair on mobile, so I hope the brackets are okay for now.)
[Discussion] That feeling of trepidation ...
/u/stellaclaire [5' 10" | CW:140 | 19.58 | -90 | F]
Created: Sun Aug 28 07:47:43 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zzfod/that_feeling_of_trepidation/
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When I've gone to bed 'light' and been following plan and I know the morning should be good, but stepping on the scale seems like such a giant step.
Until I put my foot on, weight exists in a limbo. The potential for loss is there, but the potential for lack of loss or even gain is also there. To stand on the scale will lose the openness of potentiality. And yet I can't not know.
[Rant/Rave] I hate myself, I lose, I feel confident, I binge. Why.
/u/TemporaryAccount_101 [5'3'' | AHAHAH | -5.5kgs | 18F]
Created: Sun Aug 28 07:44:25 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zzf9h/i_hate_myself_i_lose_i_feel_confident_i_binge_why/
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I'm so sorry if this is too depressing and/or triggering but I never really told anyone anything before coming here and I trust you lovelies.
This week I managed to lose around 2.2lbs in 3 days. I was so excited that I tried on a pair of jeans that didn't fit me since two years. I'm not gonna lie, when sitting down they pushed the fat out of my thighs and as disgusting as it sounds; they fit me on the hips.
They. Fit. Me.
And you know what I did? I binged the next day, fasted 20hours and binged again. Guess what? They don't fit anymore.
I hate me. Why, I finally get to lose weight and I binge? Why? Why isn't losing weight make me want to restrict more?
The best part of those three days was that I wasn't thinking about food much. I don't count calories, just eat smaller portions and yet, I managed to not think about food and lost more than I did in 2 weeks of calorie restriction.
I can't even remember what/how much I ate. Then I woke up from this "dreamt" state and binged.
I hate this. I wish I could have gone on without worrying about food, I would have probably lost another 4 lbs if I didn't binge.
I didn't even go running today, I sort of have up. I did sign up for the challenge, so starting tomorrow I'll get bAck on track but...I hate this. I hate that I went from orthorexia to BED. I hate it.
Sorry, it's a lot of angst and rambles, no need to reply, just needed to vent.
Have a lovely day people <3
[Goal] Sometimes lighting can make a huge difference...I kind of think I look okay here (slightly lower weight) and want to get back
/u/throwawaytodayokc [5'4.25" |96.2|16.7|-22 since 8/2015]
Created: Sun Aug 28 07:18:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zzc28/sometimes_lighting_can_make_a_huge_differencei/
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http://imgur.com/b3HxEyJ
[Help] Does restricting make you feel.. weird?
/u/throwawaynm88 [Height 5'3.5"| CW 114.6 lbs| BMI 20| SW 125 lbs| GW 100 lbs]
Created: Sun Aug 28 05:58:50 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zz3t4/does_restricting_make_you_feel_weird/
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I feel sort of like I'm in a dream. Like, spacey.. and I am blurting things out without thinking.. I'm not sure if it's my meds(I have bipolar) or from restricting. I mainly used to B/P.. So, restricting for this long is new to me.. I used to restrict 5 days, binge 1, but I drank so heavily back then that I can't remember how I felt.
[Rant/Rave] I hate waiting!!
/u/throwawaynm88 [Height 5'3.5"| CW 114.6 lbs| BMI 20| SW 125 lbs| GW 100 lbs]
Created: Sun Aug 28 05:55:15 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zz3ix/i_hate_waiting/
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Does anyone else hate waiting to hit their goal?? I wish it was possible to lose 4 lbs a day!! Even 1 lb every other day now feels like it's too slow. I'm 1 lb away from my first goal, and it probably won't happen until Tuesday. And then I have 3 more goals before I'm at my UGW.. I'm also afraid when I hit 100 lbs I won't be able to stop there, especially if I've been restricting for a long time and made it a normal every day part of my life. I hadn't even indulged in my ED in 4 years prior to relapsing... Idk, just rambling I guess.
[Discussion] How do you deal with dating ,flirting and self confidence ?
/u/mandarinexd [5'3" | CW:99 | BMI:17.74 | - 11 lbs | F]
Created: Sun Aug 28 05:44:26 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zz2fj/how_do_you_deal_with_dating_flirting_and_self/
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The more I lost weight, the more insecure I feel with my crush ? I don't understand, I'm like "I have to be pretty for them to like me", but on the other hand I end up even more shy than usual because of the self loathing. Without forgetting the body issues ..
Also, DAE feel this when they have dates and food involved. I mean, I don't think in the past 3 months my dates saw me eating in front of them . I hate eating in front of people . It raises asks after a while...
How do you deal with all of that when you are in relationships ? Do they know about your ED ? Or how do you deal when you are single ? Do you still want to date ?
[Thinspo] Sunday Thinspo: Vanessa Ives of Penny Dreadful
/u/dbishop22
Created: Sun Aug 28 04:17:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zyuv7/sunday_thinspo_vanessa_ives_of_penny_dreadful/
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https://imgur.com/gallery/b7Gtl
[Rant/Rave] Dear pool: Watch out, Im back!
/u/Skinnywolf9 [5'4" |131.2 | 22.82| -7| F]
Created: Sun Aug 28 04:09:24 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zyu9n/dear_pool_watch_out_im_back/
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Ive been recovering from medical issues and surgery for the last 2 YEARS! I used to be a gym rat- cardio and toning. Got me down to my lowest weight. But I had to stop due to pain and problems. Since then Ive gained 25 lbs!!!!!! Ugh just writing it makes me feel gross. BUT NO MORE! Today-I went to the pool!
The pool is the only work out Im allowed to do now because its non-weight bearing. I have been cleared to go for a while but honestly, I was embarrassed and didnt want to wear a swim suit. But Im just so over being a lump. So I did 60 minutes of laps and body "weight" exercises. OMG it felt so good. I love pushing my body to the limit. Feel exhausted from working so hard. Plus, I cannot for ht elife of me fast (on a 4-6-8-10 diet currently). LOOK OUT GW- HERE I COME!!!
[Rant/Rave] I find out if I have to go back to hospital tomorrow.
/u/PREDATORA [175cm | CW: 65kg | GW: 55kg | M]
Created: Sun Aug 28 04:04:06 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zyttj/i_find_out_if_i_have_to_go_back_to_hospital/
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If they say I have to go to hospital again I think I might just have a breakdown and die. I really don't want this, I only just got out too. :'(
[Discussion] Comparing portions; DAE do this?
/u/isolatedintrovert [155cm | CW: 46kg | GW: 40kg | 19.93 | F]
Created: Sun Aug 28 02:26:06 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zylex/comparing_portions_dae_do_this/
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Whenever I eat with friends, family, others in general, I always keep an eye on what they order (at a restaurant) and how much they eat (home or out) to make sure that I'm eating less than everyone around me - if I can't avoid eating altogether.
I especially do this with skinny friends. I don't think anyone has noticed yet, but what should I do if they do? Does anyone else do this?
[Rant/Rave] Counting in lbs is so much more comforting
/u/commtra [5'7 | GW:110 | -11 | F]
Created: Sun Aug 28 02:08:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zyjxc/counting_in_lbs_is_so_much_more_comforting/
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any other metric people relate? lbs are less than kg so I actually feel good when I wake up a pound lighter as opposed to like 0.4 kg less
[Discussion] My weird thinspo thing
/u/Lunar_Heart [61.75 in | 84 lbs | 16.08 | -23 | f]
Created: Sun Aug 28 00:51:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zycyu/my_weird_thinspo_thing/
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So. I am incredibly thinspired by...
Roman shit.
Like, ancient imperial Roman shit.
Reading about Roman emperors (especially my favourite), browsing dank memes about Rome, looking at Roman statues, learning about their pantheon and customs and cultures.
I watched Gladiator yesterday and didn't eat for nearly twelve hours because it was just so motivating.
And whenever I tell anyone how much I absolutely adore ancient Rome they like totally don't get how important it is because I can't them that not only is it one of my hobbies, it's my motivation to be a better, smaller me.
Anyway, I just wanted to get that slightly odd but rather innocuous thing off my chest to people who would (kind of) get it.
Anybody else got anything seemingly unrelated to actual weight loss or aesthetics that get them on track?
[Other] I just want to wear crop tops
/u/Skinniminnie [5'3" | 157.0 lbs | 27.6 BMI | -12 lbs | F]
Created: Sun Aug 28 00:48:33 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zycnp/i_just_want_to_wear_crop_tops/
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All I want in life is to wear crop tops and short shorts and look good in them.
I want to wear lingerie and feel sexy.
I want to be able to dress skimpily and look skinny and feel beautiful.
That's literally all I want in life, and if I destroy my body in the process, I can't seem to bring myself to care.
Recovery was a bitch and the reason I'm this heavy here today. I told my husband I didn't ever want to go through recovery again after he asked if I was leaning back towards my ED tendencies (unfortunately, unknown to him I've been restricting for the past few months because I fell back into my ED tendencies a while back) and I told him that I never want to recover again. Twice I've done so and both times I've gained over 40 lbs.
Third times a charm?
[Rant/Rave] I had a dream last night
/u/LiamNeesonsMegaCock [5'4'' | CW: 145 lbs | 25.38 | GW: 105 lbs | F]
Created: Sat Aug 27 21:37:15 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zxr94/i_had_a_dream_last_night/
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After a particularly bad day of bingeing and drinking, I had a really vivid dream (thanks melatonin). I don't have clear details about what I was doing in it or who I was with, but the very vivid part was that it was a world where people didn't need to eat. Not just food, but no sustenance required, besides water. Food didn't exist. I was slim and fit and just maintaining. And it was amazing.
I know it was probably my brain wishing it could stop thinking about food and weight, like a normal person, but maybe that's genuinely how I wish my body worked at this point. I have such little faith in my ability to eat normally and healthily that my subconscious thinks the only way I'll be happy is if the laws of thermodynamics stop fucking existing.
Not that it didn't stop me from bingeing again today....
Anyone else have dreams like this? Where you wish the world was different because you know you'll never be able to have control?
After an awesome week of severe restriction, I ate normally tonight out of guilt..
/u/Para-Medic [5'1' | too much | too much |0 | F]
Created: Sat Aug 27 21:36:39 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zxr6a/after_an_awesome_week_of_severe_restriction_i_ate/
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Sorry I'm on mobile and I can't flair as a rant. I made my kids dinner. I try to eat a small dinner with them as normally as possible so that they don't pick up on my terrible relationship with food. Today, I have been at 0 energy all day. I dragged myself out of bed to take them to the grocery store and I was so annoyed with everything, and in turn, I was being mean to them for no reason. I didn't feel floaty and happy anymore. I just felt selfish and like a shit mother. I made them dinner and ate with them. I then drank my 1st beer in a while. Then my 2nd, then sunflower seeds (my go-to beer snack of the past) and now I feel like a fat, disgusting loser. I am in control enough right now to know I have to be careful around them. I never want my daughters to feel this way. Maybe severe restricting all week and "normal" eating on the weekend is what I have to do.
[Tip] Fruity perfume to ward off binges
/u/throwawayyaymatehaha [5'3" | CW: 94 | 17.11 | -32 | F]
Created: Sat Aug 27 21:34:41 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zxqx0/fruity_perfume_to_ward_off_binges/
---
I recently picked up this mango-scented perfume from Victoria's Secret, and whenever I'm thinking about binging, I spray some of the perfume on my wrist and inhale the scent. Either I decide not to eat, or binge on low-calorie fruits instead.
[Rant/Rave] My goodness, fail of a weekend
/u/littleone91011 [5'4" | 108 | 18.4 | F |]
Created: Sat Aug 27 20:59:27 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zxm1k/my_goodness_fail_of_a_weekend/
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Please help. Since yesterday evening, I've just been having the WORST weekend, food-wise. Yet I'm having the loveliest weekend with my family. How do I stop? How do I balance participating with restricting? Any advice would be amazing right now. I'm drunk, and lost. Love you all. <3
Edit: on mobile, will flair later.
[Rant/Rave] big rant, sorry in advance
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Aug 27 20:42:53 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zxjvq/big_rant_sorry_in_advance/
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[deleted]
[Thinspo] Amaaaaaaaaaazing Netflix thinspo, especially if you're in a melancholy mood
/u/fckk [5'4| CW 120lbs | 20.60 | GW 115 | F]
Created: Sat Aug 27 20:39:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zxjid/amaaaaaaaaaazing_netflix_thinspo_especially_if/
---
"I Believe in Unicorns"
[Tip] Current sweet tooth obsession. Half a cup for 60 calories/ 4 grams of protein
/u/mermaid_puppy [5'11" | 137lb | UGW 115 | F]
Created: Sat Aug 27 20:32:29 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zxijk/current_sweet_tooth_obsession_half_a_cup_for_60/
---
http://i.imgur.com/OI8UWl4.jpg
[Rant/Rave] Thank you
/u/sveltevelvet [5"8 | GW: 105-115 | -16 lbs | 18F]
Created: Sat Aug 27 19:39:34 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zxbq0/thank_you/
---
ED problems aside, I'd like to thank everyone in this sub for being so kind and well-meaning towards eachother. I feel like I couldn't get any of this support in another sub. I have a lot of problems: social anxiety, disordered eating and just.. low self esteem.
I think one benefit to this sub is that's it's relatively small so we don't get enough trolls in here, at least not regularly. And we're all suffering, so we're not too mean eachother lol.
I'd feel weird not coming here for a while, I think it's so real to come here and see everyone's life occuring, because I'm completely isolated and I feel like I can root for everyone here.
*"I like the thought that in our struggles come the most beautiful things.”* <-- this quote conveys what I'm trying to say.
It's not often that I find that I can trust someone, internet or off, so I'd just like to show my appreciation to the mods, the regular users I see all the time, and to the lurkers. Thanks : )
[Goal] I made it!!
/u/throwawaynm88 [Height 5'3.5"| CW 114.6 lbs| BMI 20| SW 125 lbs| GW 100 lbs]
Created: Sat Aug 27 19:37:36 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zxbgt/i_made_it/
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I made it through 24 hours at the trailer without binging or anything!! And I'm 116.4 lbs tonight, so I'm down .2 lbs from before I left. Hopefully that means tomorrow I'm 115 something, and hopefully can reach 114 in the next week. I am dying to add in a raw lunch to replace one of my 3 shakes.
[Other] Mid Fast...
/u/salamanderqueen [5'9"| CW: 159.4 | SW: 180 | GW: 120 | -20.6 | 19F]
Created: Sat Aug 27 19:08:10 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zx7od/mid_fast/
---
And I'm this close to giving up and order myself an entire pizza. I'm 24 hours into a 48 hour fast, too far in to give up. Whyyyyy can't I have any self control :(
Will flair when I get home
Mid Fast...
/u/salamanderqueen [5'9"| CW: 159.4 | SW: 180 | GW: 120 | -20.6 | 19F]
Created: Sat Aug 27 19:08:10 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zx7oc/mid_fast/
---
[removed]
[Help] INSANE WEIGHT GAIN HELP
/u/TopCat1392 [5'3.5" | 111.4 | 19.88 | -26.6 | F]
Created: Sat Aug 27 18:52:25 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zx5m2/insane_weight_gain_help/
---
I know I know, another one of these. Sorry. But I've been eating 100-200 cal above maintaince this week so I expected to gain a LITTLE but the scale is up 10 POUNDS!!
How much of this realistically is fat? I'm trying not to meltdown but seeing the scale just so much has me in tears.
[Help] How do you guys get over a really awful binge.
/u/meredith3313
Created: Sat Aug 27 17:18:45 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zwsbd/how_do_you_guys_get_over_a_really_awful_binge/
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First time posting here; please be nice. I'm sure this question has been asked before but I'm dealing out. I binged an INSANE amount today and I just have no idea how to get over it both physically and mentally. Any tips would be appreciated :-)
[Discussion] DAE look at recipes for hours instead of binging?
/u/supersizetrainwreck [5'9 | CW 130.7lb | 18.95 | F]
Created: Sat Aug 27 16:59:07 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zwpeq/dae_look_at_recipes_for_hours_instead_of_binging/
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I'll spend hours looking at recipes; low calorie, vegetarian, vegan, desserts, cooking hacks, cooking gifs, buzzfeed lists, meal prepping, etc, but never actually get up to go make something or eat anything. Anyone else?
[Other] Halo Top finally came to Iowa; even here it was $6.69 per pint. (Worth it.)
/u/InSkyLimitEra [5' 7.25" | HW 180 | CW 117 | LW 114.6 | 29 F]
Created: Sat Aug 27 16:04:44 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zwh1z/halo_top_finally_came_to_iowa_even_here_it_was/
---
http://i.imgur.com/MQ6sXw3.jpg
[Meme/Humor] When you're trying to stop mid-binge.
/u/Melusedek [173 | CW: 58.9 | GW: 56.8 | 19.68/19.45 | F]
Created: Sat Aug 27 15:15:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zw9gx/when_youre_trying_to_stop_midbinge/
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https://media2.giphy.com/media/yXjmI0lprYUlq/200.gif
[Other] Gym Vlog... thing?!
/u/driftinglochawe [182cm | CW 85kg | GW 65kg | 24.4 | -2 | F]
Created: Sat Aug 27 15:06:20 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zw82m/gym_vlog_thing/
---
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mKJvP1pKUFI
[Tip] Just a tip, there's this template called "calorie amortization schedule" on excel! It's like losertown, but way better!
/u/lightfeathers
Created: Sat Aug 27 13:30:14 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zvslw/just_a_tip_theres_this_template_called_calorie/
---
I've been playing around with it for a while now :) it's sad knowing I have to heavily restrict for an extra month and a half because of my binge month but it's still good to know :)
[Rant/Rave] My boyfriend went to a party without me.
/u/rawtruism
Created: Sat Aug 27 13:10:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zvpfq/my_boyfriend_went_to_a_party_without_me/
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RANT!! So, my boyfriend knows about my issues with eating, and I've even told him (especially a lot these last days) that I don't like how much I eat when I'm with him, and that it has to stop because I hate myself every time we eat together.
We were supposed to go to a party together today, and he slept at my place last night, incredibly drunk. This morning, his hangover demanded pizza and he said he'd buy me one as well, so I ordered one with salad in a silly attempt to make it somehow healthier. I ate my entire pizza while he saved 3 pieces of his for later, and so later on I had one of his pieces and he had the rest. I made him eat some oatmeal later while telling him that he had to eat more because it would be impossible for me to go out if he had eaten less than me.
I don't know whether we ate the same amount or not, but he was so full, and I barely feel like I've eaten one meal. I hate it. He started talking about leaving for the party and I just... Switched off. I couldn't even look at him. I told him it would be strange, but I did want to go, I just wasn't sure how to manage. And he left anyway because he didn't want to wait anymore.
I texted him saying that it was difficult to keep talking about it because I already explained and he did nothing, and he said we could talk about it the next time we're together. But what does it even matter?? I'm too depressed to have fun and I could have gone out tonight but everything just turned to shit. I'm so fucking angry right now because of him.
[Discussion] What weird thing are you proud of because of your ED?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Aug 27 13:00:10 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zvnpa/what_weird_thing_are_you_proud_of_because_of_your/
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[deleted]
I just found a food diary from tenth grade.
/u/needsthoserockets [5'55 | 108.6 lbs | 18.04 | 21F]
Created: Sat Aug 27 12:51:21 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zvm88/i_just_found_a_food_diary_from_tenth_grade/
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Rant, I guess.
For context, I am starting my fourth year of uni in September.
I can't believe I have been screwed up about food and body image for this long. How did I end up semi-okay if I have been so obsessive for more than half a decade? No idea. I honestly feel lucky.
The journal also has little jokes to myself about how I am so "obsessive compulsive." This is cute because now I know I actually am obsessive compulsive and that it's a problem.
It's just hilarious to look back on those things and realize that at the time, I thought it was fine. I used to make myself throw up back then, too. But I thought I wasn't bulimic? How did I justify that? Ha. I only started acknowledging I'm bulimic last year. Ha, ha.
wanted to share.
[Other] What a relief is to be back.
/u/Mi__ra [165cm |49 kg | 18.22 | 0 | F]
Created: Sat Aug 27 11:45:21 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zvb3i/what_a_relief_is_to_be_back/
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A couple of weeks ago I saw myself in a full-body mirror, and realized I couldn't live with this body.
I really tried to recover for those couple of months I was away, but I kept binging and purging practically daily, even if I ate a healthy amount of food. I do exercise for an hour every day, but still I had tummy and my arms are a disgusting. I really can't handle this, I really can't. I want a flat stomach once again.
It's such a relief to go back. I don't have to force myself to eat 500 kcals for breakfast. I don't have to do rest days. I don't have to battle with myself if I'm going to throw up after a binge or not. It's so much easier this way.
[Thinspo] Lizzy's legs in this fancam
/u/taeyeons-comrade [perpetual shame]
Created: Sat Aug 27 11:44:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zvaw2/lizzys_legs_in_this_fancam/
---
http://i.imgur.com/hIHx2aM.jpg
[Full video](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-bXvL3rbgJk)
It's scary but I can't stop looking..
[Discussion] Do you judge other peoples bodies as much as you do your own?
/u/Polarlol [6'3" | CW 177 | BMI 20.8 | -33 | M | GW 170]
Created: Sat Aug 27 11:37:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zv9ts/do_you_judge_other_peoples_bodies_as_much_as_you/
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I judge most people i see, but i dont think nearly as badly as i do myself. I guess im asking if its perfectionism, self loathing, or both?
[Other] [Other] Thanks, soccer coach.
/u/Im_A_Whale_AMA [5'3.5" | bloated whale, will update | GW: 100 | UGW: 80 lbs | F]
Created: Sat Aug 27 11:27:11 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zv7xv/other_thanks_soccer_coach/
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So I'm starting up my soccer season (I play club, by the way) in a couple weeks, and my new coach assigned a preseason training regiment.
Basically, it includes two separate weeks. The first week is 1 mile, 10 pushups, 10 situps, and 15 sprints per day. The second week is 2 miles, 25 pushups, 25 sit ups, and 30 sprints per day.
He also included something about trying to reduce unhealthy food intake, and that really gave me the wake-up call thatI needed. Soccer is full of thin, fit girls, and I need to be able to fit in with them.
Of course, I'm going to be doing double the running. It's the best for burning calories 😄
Sorry if this is a bit off topic, but I wanted to share it with you guys. Forced exercise certainly isn't a bad thing for me!
Edit: Words, smh
[Rant/Rave] FUUUUUUUUUUCK
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Aug 27 11:09:43 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zv50c/fuuuuuuuuuuck/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] I get so jealous
/u/kafka__dreams
Created: Sat Aug 27 11:07:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zv4qd/i_get_so_jealous/
---
Earlier, my boyfriend told me I have been his longest relationship. Later, we were watching a show together and this girl came on and she was soo thin and so pretty with beautiful hair, everything I'm not, and my boyfriend says "woah she looks exactly like my first girlfriend. Oh sorry babe, I forgot, I guess I was with her the longest." And he said it so offhandedly but it just made me so sad. Im not gonna eat today.
[Rant/Rave] Upset even though I shouldn't be
/u/smallsmallersmallest [168cm | CW 52.5kg GW 47kg | 18.66 | -8.5kg | F]
Created: Sat Aug 27 10:55:38 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zv2lw/upset_even_though_i_shouldnt_be/
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As some of you may know, I'm on holiday right now and my goal while im here for a week is to maintain, which for me is about 1500 calories. Normally my upper limit that im comfortable with is 1000, today I ate 1201 and I'm proper unhappy with myself :( But I shouldn't be because I'm "allowing" myself to eat a bit more freely this week. I wish I could just enjoy food like everyone else does.
[Help] I wanna buy a fitbit charge hr
/u/Sonnenblumenschein [5'3.5" | 91.5 lbs | 16.0 | -63.5 lbs]
Created: Sat Aug 27 10:44:53 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zv0v7/i_wanna_buy_a_fitbit_charge_hr/
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Is this a good choice or are there cheaper alternatives, I'm really keen on the heartratemonitor thing tho.
Sorry if this question is inappropriate for the sub, but you guys seem like the type that knows this shit. :P
[Rant/Rave] I'm the midst of a super unhealthy binge
/u/H2OandCaffeine [5ft7 | FAT | -15 lbs | F]
Created: Sat Aug 27 10:35:26 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zuz94/im_the_midst_of_a_super_unhealthy_binge/
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I fucking hate myself. I have been eating 700 cal every day and haven't seen the scale really dipping that much. So what do I do? Binge like fuck. Ugh. I'm disgusting.
[Discussion] Daily Food Diary! August 27, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Sat Aug 27 10:02:12 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zutud/daily_food_diary_august_27_2016/
---
This is a daily food diary thread for August 27, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
[Discussion] DAE feel no remorse when it comes to raw ftuits and veggies?
/u/High_as_red [5'3 | F]
Created: Sat Aug 27 06:12:47 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4ztz39/dae_feel_no_remorse_when_it_comes_to_raw_ftuits/
---
https://www.reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4ztz39/dae_feel_no_remorse_when_it_comes_to_raw_ftuits/
Pro Ana group chat
/u/Petty-binch
Created: Sat Aug 27 05:12:18 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4ztt9d/pro_ana_group_chat/
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If you want to join the group chat comment your kik users!!!❤️
[Other] A letter to myself.
/u/lightfeathers
Created: Sat Aug 27 04:16:04 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zto1x/a_letter_to_myself/
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I'm writing this to myself for when I ever feel like binging again. Feel free to ignore this.
R,
You spent a whole month binging and hating yourself. Telling yourself that you HAVE to eat this or that because tomorrow, you'll go back to starving yourself. I know, I deprived you of food too much. But you used to have control. You used to be able to feel REAL hunger and absolutely love the feeling of it.
Your collarbones aren't as visible, your hips bones don't stick out as much. Your uniform was perfect a month ago and now you feel like a whale in an aquarium. Where do you want this to go? Do you rather have baggy clothes or clothes so tight you feel like you're gonna burst?
You despise your body, I know. But why give yourself more reasons to hate it? I know that you don't feel like you belong in this body. Like you just want to step out of your skin. I know that sometimes you fantasize about killing yourself and having another body and this time, you're gonna love it and you're gonna take care of it. But that's probably not the case. This is the only body you'll have.
Don't binge. For yourself. And if you hate yourself enough to not care, for the man you love. He hates seeing you like this and hearing you complain about how fat you feel and how you're stuffing yourself with ridiculous amounts of food. He's getting tired of your shit, I bet. So, if you really do love him, you have to gain back control. You don't need that piece of pizza or cake or a plate of pasta. You can survive another month without it. Maybe even more.
He says he'll always be there for you and that he loves talking to you, even when you complain. But we both know that he has a limit. And one day you'll reach it. But you don't have to. You can take back your self-control and you can take back your body.
Just please, don't give up.
[Other] From me (post-binge), to you, (pre-binge)
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Aug 27 04:11:22 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4ztnlq/from_me_postbinge_to_you_prebinge/
---
[deleted]
No winning
/u/beautyandbeast5 [5'2 | 123.5lb | 22.6 | 42lb | F]
Created: Sat Aug 27 03:02:56 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zthhz/no_winning/
---
On mobile: flair as self hatred. Or discussion. Idk.
I'm really sad today. I've been hanging out with my friend (let's call her Alley) and it's two days of non stop binging. She's so petite at 5'2, 100lb, while I'm the same height at 120lb. It guts me because I love being around her, and when I am with her I don't feel any depression or anxiety and she just makes my day better. But the problem is that she eats so much... Maybe it's just that she never gets to eat before we catch up for something (the girl sleeps her days away), but for me even one meal with her means going over my calorie count MASSIVELY. I don't know what to do. I love her, but I hate myself after hanging out with her.
She knows I've got bulimia (but in remission for several months now), and that I'm trying to be more aware of my satiety levels. The problem is that I've realised I actually feel full very quickly into a meal, so when I try to practice being healthy and stop eating at this point to prevent a binge she gets worried I'm restricting. She tells me to just eat a moderate, healthy amount but it's not so easy. It's so, so difficult and I feel like she just isn't capable of understanding how difficult it really is. What do I do. I just don't know what to do.
I think I've put on a kilo. I'm going to end up taking some legally grey-area pills to lose the rest of my weight at this rate, even though they damaged some of my nerves and sense of taste the last time I took them. Fuck I hate myself. My stupid, ugly, fat fucking self. Maybe if I lost everyone, bf, friends, everyone... Maybe then I'd learn to stop eating. *sits down in corner and cries*
[Help] WEIGHT GAIN HELP
/u/jrste310 [5 ft | 106 lb | 21.34 | -21.5| Female]
Created: Sat Aug 27 03:00:30 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4ztha3/weight_gain_help/
---
i weighed 102.7 on wed, ate normally and was 104.6 thursday, did a juice clense today and am now 106. this is two scales. HOW IS THIS HAPPENING WHAT DO I DO HELP
[Help] Lifters - would it be a good idea for me to really give bulking a go?
/u/smokesanddietcokes [<3 ]
Created: Sat Aug 27 01:04:37 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zt6fi/lifters_would_it_be_a_good_idea_for_me_to_really/
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As I keep rambling on about, I'm at a crossroads at the minute.
I want to lose weight and be 88lbs, but I keep gaining and losing the same 7 or so lbs over and over again (92-99ish), what percentage is fat or water weight at any time, I don't know. I'm still attempting to eat at a deficit, but failing miserably a lot. I used to average out at 600kcal a day, now the lowest I average out at is around 1200kcal, to 1600kcal (barring binge week..). More often around 1400 in the middle, that includes fasting a couple of days, overeating a couple of days, not consistent cal intake. Not enough to get me to 88lbs.
I tried 'building muscle' before, ever since I started lifting actually, but ED brain kept me trying to do it while fasting, while on a deficit. ED brain told me I could cheat the system somehow.. I saw some improvement in body composition from lifting, but obviously no real muscle gains. Okay, maybe some lucky newbie gains..
While I want to be 88lbs, that's my back-up goal - my ultimate goal is to build muscle and be fit, lean, toned, look strong. Not sure of weight, maybe try to be somewhere in between 95-105. A little muscle, but lean still. Not sure. The only reason I'm shooting for 88lbs right now is because of how I massively failed to be comfortable eating more, and when I realised that I wasn't gonna build muscle anyway, I went back to the 'skinny' route.
It's all I know. Eating at a deficit, high restriction, fasting.. it's what I've done through 130lbs weight loss. Any periods of eating more were not planned, they were me 'falling off the wagon'.
But yes, I'm at the crossroads. I'm frustrated that the weight isn't falling off as fast as it used to when I was obese, even though I know that's impossible now. Stressed, bouncing around the scale.. and shit, the bloating I get from eating after fast days is starting to do my head in. I look pregnant like half the week?!
So I'm thinking of, starting December 1st, really giving a go at bulking for 2 months. A clean, lean, slow bulk - eating at a *legit* surplus. Really trying hard to do it properly. I know I will gain some fat even if I am successful in building the muscle I want, and will need to cut that to be lean.. but maybe that will be good for me? To sort of.. restart weight loss, at a lower weight than when I was obese. Reset my mindset? Even out a little? Maybe learn some more balanced habits along the way, more about nutrition..
Eurgh, but I'm scared. Is bulking a good idea for me? Is it ever a good idea? Is 2 months lean bulk too long? I say starting December 1st and 2 months because it covers Xmas, partners anniversary, and my birthday (meaning I can try and eat without guilt for those days!) and also they are colder months, and I get so cold these days. It will give me time to really do my research, and perhaps attempt to reverse calculate my TDEE so I know it more accurtely. Also, maybe I'll look nice in time for summer with that time frame, cutting afterwards!
..Would it mess me up? Physically? I would ask emotionally too but I guess no one knows. Could this go wrong?
Shit I dunno. Opinions? Any experience with 'bulking' for muscle gains?
[Tip] Walmart has the greatest flavored sparkling water ever. Tastes just like soda, and the can makes pretending it is a lot easier.
/u/SomeoneCoolerThanYou [5'5" | CW fat | -5 | GW 120 lbs | F]
Created: Sat Aug 27 00:48:06 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zt4tm/walmart_has_the_greatest_flavored_sparkling_water/
---
http://imgur.com/a/tl4oh
You know you have an ED when...
/u/Smaylin [5'4.5" | 117lbs | 20.08 | -11lbs | GW: 98lbs | F]
Created: Sat Aug 27 00:37:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zt3rv/you_know_you_have_an_ed_when/
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you're convinced your jeans actually just stretched a massive amount rather than you actually losing weight because you can't tell in the mirror
[Rant/Rave] Today was a bad day for me...
/u/Skinniminnie [5'3" | 157.0 lbs | 27.6 BMI | -12 lbs | F]
Created: Sat Aug 27 00:32:11 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zt35t/today_was_a_bad_day_for_me/
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I have been steadily losing weight, about 11 pounds in the last month since I have hit my highest point and decided enough was enough and the binging had to stop. I fell back into restriction because it was familiar and its comforting. I'm now down to as my flair shows, 158 lbs.
Problem is I'm in the military and the military decided that I'm not only too fat for weight but also for being taped. If you don't know how it works, as a female you get your neck and your waist and your hips (basically your butt) measured with a tape measurer. Since the last time I've done this, I have lost a total of an inch from my neck.
Yay weight loss!
Boo military... Because that means I busted tape (failed hard) and I now have to worry about losing my dream career because my binging was out of control for months before I got a handle back on it.
Then I went and made the mistake of feeling bad and comfort eating. Not even binging, just normal people eating and I felt guilty. Literally today I've had a Flatbread wrap w/ tomatoes, basil, and fresh mozarella for lunch, I've had an energy drink to stay awake for the rest of the work day, I had two pieces of pizza for dinner and I had a small cinnabon cinnamon roll and a can of coca cola. Its not excessive in what it sounds like, BUT its more than I'm used to.
I'm just so pissed and upset. Tomorrow is a fasting day. Sunday is a fasting day. Monday - Thursday 600 calories max kind of days. Maybe I'll fast for two or three of those days too. I'm not decided yet because I work out every morning and I know that I need some kind of energy.
[Rant/Rave] I thought I was getting better... I'm not.
/u/imnotofuckingkay [47 in | 68 lbs | 21.5 | F]
Created: Sat Aug 27 00:09:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zt0uw/i_thought_i_was_getting_better_im_not/
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So a few weeks ago I had this "epiphany" about what I was doing to my life / body and decided I was going to stop. I started slowly upping my calories from 800 to 900 a day.
But a few days later I went on a Nutella binge and then purged. I have *never* binged or purged before. That should have been my first fucking clue.
I also kept restricting to 900 and can't make myself go above that. Then a few days later I b/p'ed again. Tonight I pulled a sealed box of leftover coffee cake out of the garbage, and chewed / spit the entire thing.
I'm also now becoming obsessed with working out. I started doing barre, and then I found blogilates. Now I'm doing Piit28 which I love. But now I find that like an hour after a workout all I want to do is go workout again. I can't even bring myself to have rest ideas.
And I'm just fucking bummed. I really thought when I have this epiphany a few weeks ago I was gonna stop restricting. Plus my birthday is next week and I'm so stressed about what I'm gonna eat or do after I eat.
Silly me for thinking things might get better.
[Help] An tips on maintaining?
/u/concuidado [4'11 | 89 lbs | 19.21 | -51| F]
Created: Fri Aug 26 23:42:41 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zsxsz/an_tips_on_maintaining/
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Does anyone have any tips for upping your calorie intake to maintain?
I'm almost at my ugw and (if I'm content at my ugw, hopefully) I would like to maintain. I'm on a 325 cal average per day diet (some days are 200 cal, some are 400 but they average out to 325 per day) and I have been losing about 1-1.5 pounds per week.
Does increasing the calories abruptly instead of slowly cause any weight gain? I want to be able to eat 700-800 cals average per day (I have a low tdee) but I feel like going up from 325 to 800 might do something idk??
Also, if anyone has any additional tips about maintaining in general, that would be great!!
Thanks!!
Restricting is getting easy
/u/kickkkasss [5'5 | fat | -20lbs | F]
Created: Fri Aug 26 21:55:32 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zskxv/restricting_is_getting_easy/
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On mobile can't flair
Restricting used to be so hard. I was always hungry, I had to try so hard, and I would binge all the time. But recently it's been getting easier and easier. I've always hated myself for eating, but now it's enough I don't even have any desire to eat. I didn't think it was possible for me and its kind of awesome.
Lose 10 lbs together !!
/u/cry_baaby
Created: Fri Aug 26 20:53:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zschy/lose_10_lbs_together/
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[removed]
I just binged
/u/mermaid_puppy [5'11" | 137lb | UGW 115 | F]
Created: Fri Aug 26 20:07:35 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zs6ai/i_just_binged/
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I dipped a Twinkie into a glass of milk. Thats not all, but I don't want to calculate calories. The worst part is that my glass of milk was fat free.
[Discussion] Trailer day 1 succesfully finished
/u/throwawaynm88 [Height 5'3.5"| CW 114.6 lbs| BMI 20| SW 125 lbs| GW 100 lbs]
Created: Fri Aug 26 19:55:50 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zs4pf/trailer_day_1_succesfully_finished/
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I made it through the first day at the trailer..
Tomorrow I have to act like I'm really nauseous starting before lunch and then I worked a small amount of dinner into myfitnesspal, I just need to stick to the 1 veggie dog and half a baked potato.. plus some salad.. problem is that my mom bought me all this other stuff, but I can take it home when we leave tomorrow.
If I get through tomorrow I may reach my first goal of 114 lbs by Monday or Tuesday, and then I'm allowing myself a veggie meal at lunch and dinner instead of just dinner! So yay to that because protein shakes until dinner are getting old! Wish me luck!
[Discussion] ED habits unrelated to eating itself?
/u/yummmies [5'4" | 130 | -35 | F]
Created: Fri Aug 26 19:39:00 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zs2d2/ed_habits_unrelated_to_eating_itself/
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Has anyone developed any weird ED habits that are not related to the actual consumption of food?
A small one for me is the fact that I'm kinda always rolling my fat between my fingers. Like I'll be standing next to a streetlight staring into the distance, and casually rolling my fat through my clothes, and pinching my stomach. I caught someone looking at me doing that earlier today, and they looked so confused.
A bigger one is that I kinda became really obsessed with looking at food. I think I spend upwards of 3-5 hours a week at grocery stores not buying anything but just staring at the food. At one such location earlier this week, I took every piece of those prepackaged single serve pastries and touched them and just stared. This extends to my youtube habits, instagram, it's like food has become my life. But I don't eat, I just look.
[Meme/Humor] Me when I'm single
/u/throwawayyaymatehaha [5'3" | CW: 94 | 17.11 | -32 | F]
Created: Fri Aug 26 18:55:42 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zrw6t/me_when_im_single/
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https://www.quora.com/Can-I-lose-weight-by-masturbating
[Help] Going to dinner with friends?
/u/Polarlol [6'3" | CW 177 | BMI 20.8 | -33 | M | GW 170]
Created: Fri Aug 26 18:41:38 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zru5i/going_to_dinner_with_friends/
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Im going to a restaurant with friends tonight and I didnt even think about how weird its going to be when I dont eat with them? What the fuck do you say? I dont want to seem anti-social but I had a really good day today and Im not gonna make myself sick to appease them. How do you guys deal with this?
Thinking about reactions to overweight vs underweight people
/u/negativeraisins [5'0" | 69 lb | 14.19 | -53 lb | FTM]
Created: Fri Aug 26 17:34:36 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zrkex/thinking_about_reactions_to_overweight_vs/
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I've been thinking about reactions from the people around me to my weight loss, and I was wondering... How would people have reacted if it was weight *gain*? If over the course of a year, rather than losing fifty, it was gaining fifty?
I suppose it would depend a lot on the rate - steady, or all at once. I know for sure that family and doctors would still get concerned medically, but I feel like they would not be panicking the way they would with loss.
Comments on appearance might differ too - some people would be afraid to bring it up, I think, more than weight loss (although I'm still adjusting from an atmosphere where people are straight-forward on what they think of your appearance to an atmosphere where it'd be rude, so maybe I'm not so accurate). They'd probably be more based on appearance concerns as well?
What do you guys think?
[Other] Binging at a buffet...this is my fortune. How sad and untrue..
/u/throwawaytodayokc [5'4.25" |96.2|16.7|-22 since 8/2015]
Created: Fri Aug 26 17:22:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zrimz/binging_at_a_buffetthis_is_my_fortune_how_sad_and/
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http://imgur.com/7Bd8pN1
When did you first start to notice progress?
/u/Kidfromelpaso [65in | 140lbs | 23.57 | 5lbs | F]
Created: Fri Aug 26 17:00:15 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zrf77/when_did_you_first_start_to_notice_progress/
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When did you guys start to notice some serious, dramatic progress?
Been back on track for a few days now. I've got a weeklong vacation coming up soon and I'm thinking about trying the ABC thing because I will probably have to spend most of my vaca in a bathing suit...has anyone tried the ABC diet? Pros? Cons?
On mobile...will flair later.
[Other] Fashion week casting NYC
/u/FredMist [5'9.5" | 110 lbs | 15.6 | -13 | f]
Created: Fri Aug 26 16:59:43 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zrf3g/fashion_week_casting_nyc/
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So there are a ton of girls running around. I went to bikram yoga today and happened to be in one with two who were there together. Not sure where they were from but maybe Russian or there abouts. Surprisingly I didn't feel fat. Older and shorter but not fat.
They were both about 5'11"~6'. One had a gorgeous doll like face and strawberry blonde curls. She was a bit skinnier than me even tho She was an inch taller. Nicely defined waist and some nice muscle tone showing through. Smaller rib cage than mine. I feel like my ribs have expanded a bit with age....who knows.
The other looked like a typical blonde model. Loooooong legs but very skinny fat. No ab definition unless she was really straining and there's no way her hips were less than 36..37. Srsly not sure how she's going to fit sample sizes. She has a small upper body but you could tell her hips bones are wider. No muscle tone in her thighs. Thin but soft.
I fell in between the two body wise but overall looked slightly stockier because I'm just that bit shorter and could stand to lose the last 3~5 lbs of fat. My abs are showing up tho so I felt good. I have been doing mini ab and glute workouts every other day or so. It's the first time I've had abs even though I've worked out harder, more consistently and been thinner. It really comes down to upping your protein intake. Next step is to continue building glutes. Keep ab work up and lose the last 3~5 lbs of fat. I've noticed my face looks more severe now with the fat lost. There's less padding around my brow ridge and i hate it. It makes me look different. I do like the cheekbones though. I've always had them but they got softened a bit when I let myself go.
I'd say the redhead was BMI 15~15.5. Blonde with slightly more mass and bigger boobs was 16ish in case anyone is interested. I obviously prefer the redheads look.
EDIT: Just realized I'm about 15.5~15.8 BMI depending on whether you're using the old calculator or the adjusted. Going to say the redhead was 14.5~15 BMI. Blonde might have been about 16~16.5. They both looked healthy. Great skin. Good hair etc.
[Rant/Rave] Doing laundry
/u/throwawayyaymatehaha [5'3" | CW: 94 | 17.11 | -32 | F]
Created: Fri Aug 26 16:37:06 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zrbi9/doing_laundry/
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I get a strange feeling of satisfaction from doing laundry and seeing that my clothes have shrunk in the wash, and knowing in a few weeks I'll be able to fit in them if I just keep going.
[Discussion] Has anyone read 'Fat Camp' on nosleep?
/u/deanhipchester [5' | 118.8 lbs | 24.43 | -23 lbs | F]
Created: Fri Aug 26 15:59:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zr5ab/has_anyone_read_fat_camp_on_nosleep/
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I don't want to link it or crosspost it because this sub has become such a safe place for me but if the admins think I should then I will happily add the link (if you can't find it just message me or check my upvoted things)!
Anyway, I know it's meant to be a horror story but I wish there was a camp like that. Where I could just be locked up and forced to exercise until I hit my weight goal. It would be blessed. And I'd actually learn to appreciate every bit of food I did receive- in moderation of course.
[Meme/Humor] me when i break a fast
/u/mandarinexd [5'3" | CW:99 | BMI:17.74 | - 11 lbs | F]
Created: Fri Aug 26 15:25:18 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zqza1/me_when_i_break_a_fast/
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http://i.imgur.com/a4FQ01p.gifv
[Rant/Rave] So on the way home from my first therapy session...
/u/woollyshirt [172cm | 54.7kg | 18.33 | -33.3kg | NB/M]
Created: Fri Aug 26 14:58:47 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zquo8/so_on_the_way_home_from_my_first_therapy_session/
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I got [this](https://imgur.com/2AikWu2) message. I ended up going into an angry lecture about how I have an ED and I didn't want to tell her this way but my subtle hints and not so subtle 'im going to therapy for eating issues' comments had been really misinterpreted and how 400 absolutely isn't enough and isn't sustainable but ultimately I feel like this has just reminded me how lonely I am. Even though I plan to maintain for a while, I plan to lose more after that. Am I going to be ridiculed by half the people in my life for being too bony and held as some fitness messiah with all the answers by the other half?
I had told her two times prior to this about healthy losing and emphasised 1200 as a minimum and not only did she ignore me as a friend but she ignored me and then continued to repeat this stuff to me as her friend with an ED. I don't want to feel like I'm competing with my own best friend but I feel so stuck here. I don't think it'll happen again but I feel like I'm going to break down and cry if it does. How can I be eating more than her without being greedy and disgusting? I feel guilty that I probably have eaten more than her today.
She did end up apologising and it seems sincere but I just don't know what the right way to react to things like this is :(
[Rant/Rave] (rant) things are getting worse
/u/tallgirlthrowaway13 [72.5" | 178 | 22.8 | 12 | F]
Created: Fri Aug 26 14:11:03 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zqlzl/rant_things_are_getting_worse/
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well, after my shit day yesterday and (maybe?) coworker bust, my boyfriend and i got into a huge fight after work. it was dumb and stupid, but we both blew up and he actually left our house because we were both so worked up. we've fought before, but this felt different. and even after we made up and talked, he still was acting distant towards me.
so this morning rolls around, and he's doing that irritating thing all guys do where they rub up against you when you're trying to sleep. it's been worse since my surgery (can't have sex/do anything worthwhile, apparently), and i kinda just hit my breaking point and i got annoyed and said something to him about it. BOOM. back to the sad beaten puppy mentality. i know he doesn't do it purposefully to manipulate me, but it makes me feel like shit regardless. so i've been trying to eat next to nothing today (only had a chicken breast because i eat with my coworkers on fridays, and some powerade zero) and i haven't heard from him all day and my anxiety is just through the roof. i'm dreading seeing him tonight, knowing we've been fighting and he's exhausted from work and commuting and i am just fucking done. i am beyond my threshold of anxiety right now. i'm exhausted. restricting and thinking about seeing my weight get lower and lower is the only thing keeping me going.
i have no one here. i moved to a new state, new job, new everything. i have work friends but no one to really talk to, and DEFINITELY no one to talk about my disordered thoughts with. work and keeping busy is all that helps me get through the day.
EDIT: bf came home and we talked and it was really nice and i feel like we've become closer because of it. i think it's been a really tough few weeks for both of us and we need to learn to be patient with one another. i feel a lot better about everything!
[Help] Extreme heat making me tired fast + making restricting hard? How to deal?
/u/realbutterflybaby [5'1" | CW: 105±1 GW: 88±1 | -26 lbs | F]
Created: Fri Aug 26 13:46:52 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zqhii/extreme_heat_making_me_tired_fast_making/
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If I eat, I get depressed and hate myself. If I don't eat (now at least), and I'm still going to classes and trying to get work done, I get sweaty, gross, overheated, and damn tired. I can't make it through a day without a nap. What is going on? How can I deal?
[Help] Not trusting the scale, or my eyes.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Aug 26 13:16:39 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zqbxc/not_trusting_the_scale_or_my_eyes/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] [Rant] this summer has been a disaster
/u/leatherhoff [5"3 | 116lb | 21.2 | FTM]
Created: Fri Aug 26 12:49:07 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zq6yg/rant_this_summer_has_been_a_disaster/
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Haven't lost anything, I did at first but quickly put it on and then some... I've been eating so much these past few days and I just realised that I'm going to be fat at my city's pride parade tomorrow:( that sounds kinda silly but i want to be skinny overnight I don't wanna be turning up to the event looking vile... Aaaaargh I wish my school term would start up again so I can get super into restriction
[Rant/Rave] I'm about to smash my fucking scale
/u/cinamintoast [5'6" | 209 | 33.87 | -61 | F]
Created: Fri Aug 26 12:45:05 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zq684/im_about_to_smash_my_fucking_scale/
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I've been fasting for two days and this week as a whole I've consumed maybe 4000 calories total (and that's being generous since I didn't count everything, it was probably less than that). YET I'VE GAINED 5 FUCKING POUNDS. The logical part of my brain realizes it's just water weight, my period is coming soon so I'm obviously just retaining water like crazy and I also haven't pooped since the last time I ate so *obviously* I haven't gotten fatter and it's not real weight and I'll probably have a whoosh once my period starts. But the ED part of my brain is going insane, watching the scale numbers go up even though I haven't put anything in my mouth but water and coffee. I was going to break my fast tonight but now I feel like I don't even deserve it.
[Goal] My goal was to fit into this dress before the beginning of september ... finally
/u/mandarinexd [5'3" | CW:99 | BMI:17.74 | - 11 lbs | F]
Created: Fri Aug 26 12:29:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zq3fd/my_goal_was_to_fit_into_this_dress_before_the/
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https://i.redd.it/4ltq4bs6srhx.png
[Discussion] Weekend trip/losing progress
/u/disbeetch [5'4'' | 144 | 24.72 | -24 | F]
Created: Fri Aug 26 12:11:06 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zq0cl/weekend_triplosing_progress/
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Sorry no flair, on mobile (sorry I'm always on mobile too)
I'm going on a trip to the lake with friends this weekend and I am so worried about how I'm going to be able to keep my progress going. How do y'all avoid eating/still losing when you're surrounded by people? I am really afraid I'll regress after the weekend because I should meet my UGW by the end of November and I REALLY want to be there by my birthday at the beginning of December
[Discussion] Purging on TV
/u/stephanynotstokes [5'6 |Weight Lost: 70 lbs | F]
Created: Fri Aug 26 11:43:52 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zpvhk/purging_on_tv/
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*cant flair on mobile*
So I was watching a tv drama and the scene called one of the main characters , a girl with bulimia to purge after she had breakfast with her family. After she finishes purging, her make up is still in tact and her clothes are nice and clean and she gently taps her face with a small handkerchief. And I was like....lol no sis....that's not how it works.
At least for me, after I purge I'm disgusting and sweaty and it's just an all around messy process. It just is kind of funny and sad how media tends to portray EDs as this beautiful graceful thing when it's not.
[Rant/Rave] Period cravings
/u/ilovepugs_ [5'6 1/2" | 149.2 | 23.7 | -4.8 | F]
Created: Fri Aug 26 11:28:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zpskt/period_cravings/
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I haven't binged in 3 days yay.
But I'm a little bit worried cause my Dad usually brings home Pizza on Fridays.
I'm just so scared that I'll cave and eat pizza. And it's not just one slice..one leads up to two. Two to three. Three ends up being the half the god damn pie :(
And we're not talking Pizza Hut pizza. We're talking New York 16 in Mom & Pop shop pizza.
And like I've been freaking out all day. I've been yelling at my family to stop buying crap for the house but sometimes my Dad caves and buys the pizza.
I'm just upset cause I already binged twice this week. And my calorie deficit right now will only make me lose about 3/4 of a pound.
And then I have to wait until next week to start fresh :(
I'm sorry for ranting over nonsense also.
I just FINALLY got my period cause it was 3 1/2 days late and it came with sore boobs and lower tummy cramps and insane cravings. I'm also super bloaty right now :(
[Other] Finally stopped a binge...by falling asleep accidentally
/u/chocolatecoveredpugs [5'4| 118| 20.6 | -22lbs | F]
Created: Fri Aug 26 10:44:38 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zpk61/finally_stopped_a_bingeby_falling_asleep/
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On mobile, will flair later!
So last night we see my ex (that I still hook up with) and his friends at a bar we're at. I'm still close to all of them and hooked up with my ex on Wednesday night. He was completely trashed and tried to make out with me and literally every single girl that passed. I played it off because I know I literally have no right to be mad/upset. So when I get home, I really really am craving this frozen pizza so I opened it and preheated the oven... And fell asleep while waiting for it to preheat. So don't know if that counts as stopping a binge but yay! Now I'm completely motivated to get to my GW and show him what he's missing.
[Tip] 180cal Dinner
/u/supersizetrainwreck [5'9 | CW 130.7lb | 18.95 | F]
Created: Fri Aug 26 10:16:24 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zpesv/180cal_dinner/
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http://imgur.com/a/4ylnC
[Other] Taking Ballroom dancing lessons
/u/madamdepompadour
Created: Fri Aug 26 10:12:42 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zpe3r/taking_ballroom_dancing_lessons/
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All, and I mean ALL, the women instructors are thin thin thin. Makes me feel like such a heffalump when I am partnered with them.
I was craving cake the other day, and decided I would get it after class. By the time class was over, and again seeing all those petite pretty teachers, cake craving went poof!
[Tip] High-protein low-cal snack discovery!
/u/blasechicken [5'6" | too much | -5 | UGW 120lb | F]
Created: Fri Aug 26 10:06:00 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zpcvj/highprotein_lowcal_snack_discovery/
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Guys, I'm in love with Costco's thick-cut beef jerky. It's chewy, satisfying, and one serving is only 60kcal and has 9g of protein! I like cutting it up into little bits because it makes it easier to eat (I have braces) and it looks like I'm eating way more food than I actually am. Score!
[Discussion] Daily Food Diary! August 26, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Fri Aug 26 10:02:41 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zpc8g/daily_food_diary_august_26_2016/
---
This is a daily food diary thread for August 26, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
[Other] He told me to watch my diet carefully ...
/u/stellaclaire [5' 10" | CW:140 | 19.58 | -90 | F]
Created: Fri Aug 26 08:29:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zove5/he_told_me_to_watch_my_diet_carefully/
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So I had my annual physical and my cholesterol is up (hdl almost 90, total a little over 200), and my weight is down (about 20), and ... he told me to reduce animal fat, processed grains, and increase veggies.
HAHAHAHA.
I just nodded and smiled. I guess I didn't need to be paranoid about the weight loss.
[Meme/Humor] TFW you have a really high-fibre binge :(
/u/thin_is_in [5'8 | 115lbs | 17.3 | -35lbs | F]
Created: Fri Aug 26 07:21:12 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zok4p/tfw_you_have_a_really_highfibre_binge/
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MncFeJPpgyE
[Discussion] Meat binge... O_o
/u/Itsemurha [177cm | 71.9kg| 22.43| -47kg | GW: 60kg | F]
Created: Fri Aug 26 06:48:06 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zof0b/meat_binge_o_o/
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Usually I am mortified after eating way too much but today my family had a roast lamb hock and I chowed down on at least a quarter of it like a starving savage tiger. I swear if someone disturbed me I would have hissed and growled at them. Tbh I haven't eaten red meat in months now so I guess something snapped in my brain and it was meat time. I didn't even purge it after and I'm kinda weirded out that I don't feel bad for eating so much at all.
Have any of you binged and not felt bad about it after?? I'm more weirded out that I didn't even panic afterwards like I have done for years. I went full animal :x
[Rant/Rave] the concept of an endpoint.
/u/bloodyunderwear [5'4" | 119 | 20.4 | -0 | 20F]
Created: Fri Aug 26 06:22:37 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zob8s/the_concept_of_an_endpoint/
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this year, but particularly this summer, my ed returned. I lost some weight that I'd picked up in college, but I've regained half that weight in the past few weeks. Honestly, I've stopped weighing myself because I know the number is just too depressing.
In my head, all of this effort was to go back to school feeling a little more confident in myself. All I feel now is a big ball of food waste sitting in my abdomen like a rock.
There was going to be an endpoint! August 28th and we're done! back to a healthy thought pattern that I've been coached through for years... back to recovery.
Now I can't even face the scale I bought specifically for this summer. I'm trying to pack for school and all I can see are my thighs touching in shorts on shorts on shorts.
It's my move. I either move past the gain and the binges, and go back to school with a healthy eating pattern, or I fast today and keep going backwards.
thanks for the support guys.
[Discussion] Weekly Selfie, Progress Pic and OOTD Thread! August 26, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Fri Aug 26 06:03:26 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zo8j7/weekly_selfie_progress_pic_and_ootd_thread_august/
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This is the weekly picture thread for August 26, 2016.
Feel free to share your selfies, progress pics or outfit-of-the-day (OOTD) pics in this thread!
**Rules**
1. Be nice, **or you will be banned.**
2. Please use [imgur](http://imgur.com/) as a host.
Consider adding commentary on featured brands, sizing, inspiration behind your OOTD (trying to look thin or cover up weightloss, etc.)!
**Remember that anyone can view the contents of this thread even if they are banned from this subreddit. If you receive unwanted messages, please contact the mods with a screenshot of the relevant messages. Note that even if we ban people, they can still message you, and they still have access to the contents of this subreddit. The best thing for you to do is to block them.**
*****
^Selfie, ^progress ^pic ^and ^OOTD ^threads ^are ^posted ^every ^Friday.
^Have ^any ^questions ^or ^concerns? ^Comment ^below, ^or [^PM ^the ^mods.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FproED)
[Rant/Rave] Little rave I suppose - can't flair on mobile
/u/wireddachrn
Created: Fri Aug 26 03:41:15 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4znsjj/little_rave_i_suppose_cant_flair_on_mobile/
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I'm just a bit pleased with myself. I woke up at 11am yesterday. Worked my 12 hour shift and I am just now taking lunch before shift change. The best part about all of this is that I have only eaten 522 calories today. Despite having more to eat in my lunch box and having been offered food. Finally gaining my self control back. Woohoo! I feel like shit right now but I love it.
[Goal] Impossibly, I reached a goal
/u/smallsmallersmallest [168cm | CW 52.5kg GW 47kg | 18.66 | -8.5kg | F]
Created: Fri Aug 26 03:30:07 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4znrcm/impossibly_i_reached_a_goal/
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Ok so I'm going on holiday today and a few weeks ago I set my goal to be 51kg by the time I leave. I was about 52.5kg at the time so this was entirely doable, until I binged for two and a half weeks straight. Quite litterally, I probably only had about two days where I didn't binge within that time. I had pretty much accepted that I wasn't going to make that goal, and for the past few days I've been trying to eat more reasonably, not worrying too much about that now impossible goal. Well, I have been worrying about it, I'm devistated that I let myself do that and put on weight like that but anyway. Yesterday I weighed 51.8kg and I was ok with that, it was close enough to my goal and considering how awful these past couple of weeks have been, I accepted it. Only to step on the scales today.. 51.1kg!!! I actually reached my goal!! It's also my new lw. I'm really happy about this, my only goal for the holiday is to not gain, any loss would just be a bonus.
Edit: Also my waist measured 24 inches. This is a good day :D
Sorry for the lack of flair, I'm on mobile.
[Discussion] Does anyone else have a silly goal for getting to their gw?
/u/Rapunzelindreamland
Created: Fri Aug 26 03:03:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4znoo4/does_anyone_else_have_a_silly_goal_for_getting_to/
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Whether you are losing or gaining, what's your silly goal for when you get there? Mine is to be able to cosplay every single version of Harley Quinn, because at my current weight I don't feel comfortable putting on spandex. Anyone else?
[Intro] A little hello!
/u/81imb [5'6.5"/169cm | CW: 112lb/51kg | GW: 103lb/47kg | F]
Created: Fri Aug 26 02:36:16 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4znltg/a_little_hello/
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Hello!
I've been a shy lurker for a long time and I've grown to really love this subreddit. I wanted to thank everyone who for inspiring me and I thought I'd finally make my little introduction.
I'm so glad to have found a place where I can feel a little at ease with myself and everyone's so lovely and supportive. I've never had a place to talk about things like restricting, fasting, and the little general paranoias over the numbers on the scale or on the back of a label.
It's a little daunting but I hope I'll be able to make some friends and stay motivated. I'd love to help support and motivate everyone else in reaching their goals too :)
Well, that's it from me. I'll see you guys around! ♡
[Rant/Rave] Ruining perfectly good healthy tasty food by making it unhealthy and gross. Just.. fucking, why?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Aug 26 02:07:17 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zniyu/ruining_perfectly_good_healthy_tasty_food_by/
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[deleted]
[Meme/Humor] MFW co-worker jokes if I lose any more weight I might 'get anorexic'
/u/lotuslotad [5'6 | 147.2lbs | 24.08 | -20.8lbs | F]
Created: Fri Aug 26 00:20:41 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zn7bd/mfw_coworker_jokes_if_i_lose_any_more_weight_i/
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http://i.imgur.com/dMbpou8.gif
[Thinspo] Just saw this on tumblr + I'm inspired af
/u/screamingfalcon [5'7.5"/171.45cm | CW: 2fat4me | GW: 121 | UGW: 108 | F22]
Created: Thu Aug 25 23:52:26 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zn41g/just_saw_this_on_tumblr_im_inspired_af/
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http://m.imgur.com/tRexTmW
i hate it when i binge
/u/tinypotheadprincess
Created: Thu Aug 25 23:50:56 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zn3ux/i_hate_it_when_i_binge/
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[removed]
[Rant/Rave] Made the silly mistake of thinking I had developed self-control.
/u/wearebulletproof [5'4 | fat | 20F🎀✨]
Created: Thu Aug 25 22:37:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zmuwo/made_the_silly_mistake_of_thinking_i_had/
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I've been going back and forth between 150 and 151 for the past week. It's extremely frustrating but whatever. It happens. My goal for this month was to lose 5 pounds and I've lost about 9 so at least I accomplished that much.
Yesterday, I was feeling slightly okay about myself so I bought one of those big packs of Oreos. I'd been doing really good with my calories and I figured hey, why not? It'll be fine. No way I'll binge on them, right?
Hahaha. Wrong. I did fine yesterday, only had about 4. I ate most of the rest of the package today, which was at least 1800 cals, along with the 400 that I had for lunch, plus the soda that I drank. I feel sick to my stomach right now. If I didn't absolutely hate throwing up, I'd probably go purge but the last time I purged, it was awful. It's too late anyway. I won't get rid of any calories.
Tomorrow, I'm going to wake up, throw the rest of the Oreos down the fucking garbage disposal, spend the rest of the day drinking my low calorie G2 (there was no Powerade zero siiiigh) and continue binge-watching The Originals. If I feel really ambitious, I might get dressed and go to the park and walk around. But most likely, I'll spend the day in my apartment, crying over fictional vampires, much like I did today.
I wish I had vodka. I'd at least feel a tiny bit better.
[Tip] Hookah = An amazing craving satisfaction for no calories.
/u/Missy_Is_Bitter [5'3"| Faaaaaaaaaaat | -23lbs | F]
Created: Thu Aug 25 21:58:35 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zmpx5/hookah_an_amazing_craving_satisfaction_for_no/
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Sorry no flair cause I'm on mobile. But Jesus tap dancing Christ I love going out for hookah. It's an awesome social thing that does not revolve around food at all. But I can get delicious flavored things with no calorie guilt. Seriously, the one we got tonight tastes like gummy worms. And smoking curbs my appetite so I don't want to eat after anyway. Smoking also feels weirdly attractive (I'm that kid who they failed to reach with anti smoking ads.)
[Discussion] Are there parts or your body that you particularly like or dislike? What do you imagine happening to your appearance as you lose weight?
/u/lovemyfragilebones [5'2" | 105 | 19.2/19.89 | -5 | gq 19]
Created: Thu Aug 25 21:30:06 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zmlxk/are_there_parts_or_your_body_that_you/
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For me, I honestly kind of hate everything. I particularly dislike my face, because I have cystic acne. It's really mild and wouldn't really be problematic except I also have derma, so I pick and pick and pick all the time, and there are always scabs and discoloration. I hate my thighs with a passion because I inherited my mother's naturally muscular thighs. I'm short, so the effect is compounded and I look really weird and chunky... which isn't helped by my breasts, which are too big and fit really uncomfortably on my frame imo. My arms too, but less so. They're not terrible but I would like them to be a little more toned and a lot slimmer. And I hate the pudge on my stomach that I can't get rid of.
...I realize I'm actually at a healthy weight and I have really bad issues with body image. I really hope I don't look as ugly to other people as I do to myself.
As for the process of reaching my UGW, I sort of imagine firming up a little bit and slimming down. I hope my face will stop being its weird shape, and maybe if I eat more veggies and fruits and drink more water, my skin will get better. All the areas of flab will be gone. I'll have bones and maybe I will finally be able to pretend I'm pretty.
Edit: typo
[Tip] Link to an automatic meal planner. (Weight loss can't be too significant) but you can control calories and input special diet types as well as choose foods you do not want to eat. You can also choose maximum calorie amounts and how many meals per day. Comes with recipes and (usually) pictures!
/u/ffj_ [5'4" | way too much | ridiculous | - | F]
Created: Thu Aug 25 21:26:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zmlfw/link_to_an_automatic_meal_planner_weight_loss/
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https://www.eatthismuch.com/
[Help] To track or not to track?
/u/CharChar12 [5' 9.5 |140lbs|21| Male]
Created: Thu Aug 25 21:24:56 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zml6v/to_track_or_not_to_track/
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I always track what I eat even when I'm not restricting because Its like "tradition" now. Any of you MFP freaks manage to break the streak? Tracking everything gives me anxiety.
[Discussion] Did getting a diagnosis of an ED change anything for you?
/u/FuckinOmlettes
Created: Thu Aug 25 20:55:04 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zmglq/did_getting_a_diagnosis_of_an_ed_change_anything/
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Like did it make things make more sense? Make things worse? Did you start looking into resources? How did it affect you?
I haven't been formally diagnosed but I definitely have been struggling with disordered eating for years. I guess I'm asking what changes happen if I get a diagnosis in my records.
[Goal] big step forward
/u/hayleystark [5'4"|NB]
Created: Thu Aug 25 20:00:52 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zm89c/big_step_forward/
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today I went out after a huge trigger, and instead of buying all high cal, high fat food, I bought pickles, soup, and Arctic zero ice cream which I didn't even finish!!!!! all told I had ~400 cals!!! really proud of myself. first time in forever I didn't have over 3000 cal in a binge.
[Rant/Rave] Consolation on a fast
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Aug 25 19:39:16 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zm4wm/consolation_on_a_fast/
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[deleted]
[Help] Thyroid issues?
/u/negativeraisins [5'0" | 69 lb | 14.19 | -53 lb | FTM]
Created: Thu Aug 25 19:01:39 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zlyu0/thyroid_issues/
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I've been posting here very frequently with my own personal issues and not with things helpful to other people, and I apologize for that. I also apologize for not flairing - I will as soon as I have access to my computer again. Might be TMI, I'm sorry.
You're all probably very tired of how often I've been saying this, but I have to go to/have gone to various doctors and get various tests, labs, exams, etc. I figured "Well, if I'm hospitalized for low nutrition things I'm screwed, but otherwise I don't have any other health problems, so they'll switch from the medical standpoint to the psychological one." That I could handle by saying the weight loss was unintentional and then telling the truth about my appetite loss, just getting hungry less and needing less to feel full + having no appetite when stressed/anxious/frustrated/etc., and nobody has to know that it came from an ED (especially since I don't know myself whether it's me, psychological, or out of habit from fasting a lot).
Except the blood work results are starting to come in, and apparently I... Have high thyroid T4 levels? So I have to go in to an endocrinologist for a more thorough test of my thyroid?
Is it possible that the appetite thing is actually from this? I've been looking it up and while increased T4 levels generally means weight loss, it means it in the sense of hyperthyroidism or some other overactive thyroid disease. I've been showing symptoms like hair loss on head, mood swings, nervous attack, sensitivity to cold/heat too maybe?, and irritability, but I figured that was the weight loss or things I always had... (Additional mental health issues for days yay, and I've always had an irregular menstrual cycle, and recent falling asleep issues I thought were for other reasons.) Besides, hyperthyroidism is supposed to give you mad hunger, and I'm the opposite...
I'm worried about false positives as well - a lot of these symptoms overlap with anorexia symptoms or things I've already had, and now I can't tell if I actually have a problem or it's from the ED and the hormone thing is just weird on its own. Will the tests be able to discern between all this?
Again, thank you to this community for always being so helpful and supportive. ProED communities always get a lot of shit (especially on the parts of the Internet that I used to typically frequent), but you guys have been invaluable in getting through all this.
[Help] Possible to drop a cup size?
/u/realbutterflybaby [5'1" | CW: 105±1 GW: 88±1 | -26 lbs | F]
Created: Thu Aug 25 18:57:14 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zly5w/possible_to_drop_a_cup_size/
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Currently a B cup. I was suspicious I had only gone up TO a B from an A because of my weight gain last year but now I'm 10 lbs from my old weight and still fit a B. If I keep going am I likely going to have to stop wearing these bras now?
[Help] How To Cleanse After Binge?
/u/witchy2628
Created: Thu Aug 25 18:00:24 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zloz8/how_to_cleanse_after_binge/
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So I've been super stressed out trying to find a new place to live this week, and I binged for like 3 full days...my longest yet. I feel like shit and my skin looks terrible and I'm bloated as all hell....is there anything I can eat/do to feel better? I'm kind of in a lot of pain so I'm getting desperate. I hate tea though so that's not really an option. How do you guys (those who binge at least) deal with the aftermath and staying motivated after the inevitable weight gain?
Sorry for no flair, I'm on mobile.
[Discussion] NY times article about how nutrition is see healthy food vs. the average American
/u/mermaid_puppy [5'11" | 137lb | UGW 115 | F]
Created: Thu Aug 25 17:13:33 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zlhbw/ny_times_article_about_how_nutrition_is_see/
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http://www.nytimes.com/interactive/2016/07/05/upshot/is-sushi-healthy-what-about-granola-where-americans-and-nutritionists-disagree.html?WT.mc_id=2016-AUG-FB-REGIP-AUD_DEV-0824&WT.mc_ev=click&ad-keywords=AUDDEVGate
[Rant/Rave] Birthday Binge Week-- trying to get back on track :(
/u/holly-mint [5'4" 23F 🌹 waist-- H: 36", L: 27", C: 33", G: 25"]
Created: Thu Aug 25 17:12:17 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zlh4i/birthday_binge_week_trying_to_get_back_on_track/
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My birthday and anniversary are 4 days apart, so this past week we have been having super rich food or leftovers from that food (I'm talking Olive Garden, birthday desserts, all-you-can-eat sushi, etc) and I haven't been below 1200 cal/day since this started, which is normally my upper limit :') It seems like once my body is used to getting this kind of food in these amounts it keeps asking for it... I will be not hungry at all (full/satisfied stomach) but my brain keeps asking for junk food. I think the only way to break this almost addictive urge to eat crap is to force myself to eat clean like I have been until it is second nature again... Please wish me luck getting away from this cycle!!!
[Discussion] Does anyone else avoid drinking practically anything other than water?
/u/gastastic [5'1 | 123 | 26F]
Created: Thu Aug 25 17:01:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zlfb4/does_anyone_else_avoid_drinking_practically/
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If I'm going to consume calories, it better be damn worth it. And I feel like drinking my calories away is such a waste.
[Rant/Rave] I just wrote this in my journal. Thought I'd share it.
/u/cyberexia
Created: Thu Aug 25 14:30:32 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zkoi8/i_just_wrote_this_in_my_journal_thought_id_share/
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I just spent at least half an hour trying to get my goddamn TV to work. I was so frustrated I wanted to beat a small animal to death with my bare hands.
I then resolved to just watch Netflix on my computer and decided to spend another 30 minutes trying to get rid of this super fucking annoying "MEGABACKUP" virus on my mac.
So now I'm STARVING (only one apple today) and tomorrow I'm only allowed 50 calories (ABC Diet Day 26).
FIFTY FUCKING CALORIES.
That's like ONE Cinnamon Apple Rice Cake.
All I want to do is order an entire large extra cheese double-black-olive stuffed crust pizza with cheese bread sticks and extra marinara. And then while that's getting delivered, go to the store and buy a dozen donuts, a jar of peanut butter, a pack of oreos, chewy chips ahoy, 2 bags of Kettle Cooked Salt and Vinegar Potato Chips, 2 bags of White Cheddar Popcorn, 2 boxes of mozzarella sticks, a bottle of ranch, White Cheddar mac 'n' cheese from Marie Calendar's (the family sized box).
And then by the time I get back the pizza would be here and then I'd just eat all of it.
But I don't have any money.
And I'd hate myself.
I'd be a failure.
I'd gain so much weight.
I finally got to 118 and I'd ruin it all and for what?
To satisfy my hunger once?
Fuck that.
[Discussion] Do you guys feel like you're missing out?
/u/Astroyeti
Created: Thu Aug 25 13:57:15 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zkija/do_you_guys_feel_like_youre_missing_out/
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I don't mean missing out on food. That's not my biggest worry considering you could easily eat whatever kind of food you want within limit (even into 15s I didn't see a reason to restrict food groups). But rather everything else. I know I don't want to be bigger than I am, but I also am aware that even being slightly underweight changes how indefinite my future feels. But even this isn't what I'm worried about (the most, I mean. I'm still worried about it but it's more like #2).
The reality of it is that I - removing all anxiety from the mix - believe that going to an amusement park and riding any ride I'd ever be interested in would kill me. I believe that I'd easily get exhausted just walking around a mall for a few hours and even more so going outside for a walk, which I don't do at the moment for other reasons, and even more so if that walk outside even involves a slight elevation. I believe I could never take a dance class or even learn dances on my own without becoming stupidly exhausted, nor ride a bike, nor swim, nor go to a haunted house, see action movies, etc. so on and so forth all because I weigh too little for my heart to be healthy. There's much more to the list, I promise.
Anxiety prevents me from doing a lot of these things already but the difference between me having anxiety and me having an eating disorder is that I can take medication to get anxiety to at silence. I can't take a medication to magically get the body I want (obviously there are other alternatives, but not appealing ones). I hate that it's either miss out on everything or live with everyone able to look at me in a body I don't like. Neither sounds nice.
[Help] Do you ever feel to depressed to eat then stuff your face?
/u/Navelpudding [5' 6" | 200 | -50 | F]
Created: Thu Aug 25 13:36:32 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zkeg1/do_you_ever_feel_to_depressed_to_eat_then_stuff/
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Like I feel like my stumache is full of that anxiety/fear/depression feeling but I eat anyway. I feel like I might vomit if I eat but I eat anyway. I'm far to depressed to taste or enjoy the taste but I eat it anyway. Someone else does this right? Please tell me I'm not alone :(
[Help] Haven't pooped in like... a week?
/u/realbutterflybaby [5'1" | CW: 105±1 GW: 88±1 | -26 lbs | F]
Created: Thu Aug 25 13:28:21 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zkcvj/havent_pooped_in_like_a_week/
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I am freaked out. I have only been restricting really for like 3 days... was eating (somewhat) normally before that. Is this something I should go see a doctor about...? I don't want to specify anything ed-related to anyone, though.
[Help] Exercise while fasting
/u/hunterxgreen
Created: Thu Aug 25 13:07:07 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zk8nu/exercise_while_fasting/
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I'm water fasting and I'm wondering about exercise. Not walking or yoga bc I do that any way but like cardio. I've heard if you exercise while fasting you're mostly losing muscle and water and I don't want to lose more muscle than I have to. But once you're in ketosis will exercise burn more fat? Also how long does it really take for your body to burn fat/enter ketosis? I've heard everything from 2-7 days.
[Rant/Rave] feeling horrible about myself
/u/tallgirlthrowaway13 [72.5" | 178 | 22.8 | 12 | F]
Created: Thu Aug 25 11:53:44 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zjub8/feeling_horrible_about_myself/
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so i'm 72.5", about 180lbs, and my boyfriend is about 70.5", 200lbs (down to 191lbs). lately he's been really tough on himself, saying he needs to lose weight and not eating a lot. i don't think he's like me in that he doesn't have my HORRIBLE relationship with food, i tend to really feel terrible and sometimes purge after eating, whereas when he eats poorly he just kind of shrugs it off.
so he got on the scale this morning, 191.4lbs. he seemed pretty happy that he's lost about 8lbs so far since eating less. and here i am, a week and a half post-op, barely able to do any exercise at all and feeling absolutely disgusting. i hate my body, and seeing him lose weight just really ramps my disordered thoughts and eating right up. i made thin mint brownies last night and i had one for breakfast this morning, and i can't stop thinking about how horrible and disgusting i am. it took everything in me to keep me from sneaking out the back door and purging right after i ate it.
in a way, i'm in a competition with him. i am just barely overweight/on the edge according to old BMI, where he's a bit more overweight, and i absolutely refuse to let him weigh less than me. it's driving me insane. i am trying so hard to restrict my eating (i'm slowly working down to less calories, at about 900 today because of my fat ass eating that fucking brownie), and i plan to go walk 5 miles after work today since i can't run/lift/do my normal workouts.
i hate myself and i hate that i am starting to resent him for beating me at the weight loss.
edit: OH GOD I'M TYPING THIS AT WORK AND OUR WEB DEVELOPER CAME OVER AND SAW ME TYPING ON THIS SITE FUCK MY FUCKING LIFE
edit part 2: oh god i went out on break and the whole IT team was so awkward with me am i being paranoid or not I am literally freaking out here pls send halp
[Discussion] What are your binges like?
/u/Superderg
Created: Thu Aug 25 11:45:22 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zjsov/what_are_your_binges_like/
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What sort of calorie counts do you get to? I had a huge binge day for me this week, ate just over 3000 calories. But upon reading some other stuff I'm feeling like it isn't that bad. I know before I restricted a big binge would be upwards of 5000 calories, but I'm gluten free now too which takes away a lot of fast food options. What's your record or regular binge like?
Can't flair on mobile, so sorry!
[Thinspo] Old School Thinspo
/u/supersizetrainwreck [5'9 | CW 130.7lb | 18.95 | F]
Created: Thu Aug 25 11:30:37 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zjpu0/old_school_thinspo/
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DPtfsk4ETjM
[Help] Another One of Those Posts-- Gaining on 1250 a day??
/u/honeytarte [5'5" | CW: 119 | GW: 105 | -25 |]
Created: Thu Aug 25 11:12:16 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zjm8x/another_one_of_those_posts_gaining_on_1250_a_day/
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So I've been alternating 900 then 1200 Mon-Sat, and eating 2500 on Sundays for like 3 weeks now. Logically and mathmatically, if we go by weekly calories and averaging and whatnot, it should be an average of 1257 per day or 8800 per week. Every TDEE calculator I've looked at puts my BMR at at least 1300 and my TDEE at like 1600-1900, and I've been using the TDEE spreadsheet and I put in some past data and it gave me a rough estimate of like 1400 (my past data is a little wonky so I'm hoping it will give me a more accurate one as I keep going with it).
Why am I not losing? I was hovering at around 119.2-119.4 all last week, and now today, like a week later, I am 119.8 and the past couple days I've been like 120-121. :( What's the dealio man?
Somebody please reassure me my math isn't wrong and that starvation mode isn't a real thing.
(Also, I track very meticulously, food scale and all that. Trust that the numbers are right.)
[Rant/Rave] Living on a college campus in the mountains is awful :(
/u/DivingRightIn [72in | don't ask | don't tell | ~57.2lbs | UGW: 115lbs | F]
Created: Thu Aug 25 11:03:32 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zjkjp/living_on_a_college_campus_in_the_mountains_is/
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~I'm ranting again because I'm a big fat complainer and I don't want to vent to anyone in my life that could discover my ED tendencies~
So I attend college in the south US and in the mountains... restricting is AWFUL here. I've been eating well under 400 calories per day because I can skip breakfast and lunch easily, and then I just have to eat a relatively "normal" dinner since I live with a friend in my dorm.
Fucking christ the hills here though. My classes on Tuesdays and Thursday are up on the verryy tippy top of a huge ass hill (even 'normal' people complain because it's a huge hill followed by a million stairs) and my dorm is alllll the way on the other side of campus (so more hills yay)
I swear to god, I came so close to falling out today. I managed to get to the building only to have to go straight to the bathroom to lock myself in a stall and put my head between my legs to try to get rid of the tunnel vision and lightheadedness. The combo of no dinner last night + humidity + heat + hill was the probably one of the worst things I've ever had the pleasure of experiencing.
The positive is I burn at least a hundred calories per day just going to classes but god damn if I don't feel like death trying to walk...
P.s. Sorry my posts are always so negative guys I'm just so damn alone :'(
[Meme/Humor] I'm sure most of us have been this kid at some point
/u/pungentthrowaway [5'1" | CW: 154 | -13 | F]
Created: Thu Aug 25 10:59:15 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zjjpo/im_sure_most_of_us_have_been_this_kid_at_some/
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https://i.redd.it/470i9kve7khx.jpg
[Rant/Rave] So I might be hospitalized.
/u/negativeraisins [5'0" | 69 lb | 14.19 | -53 lb | FTM]
Created: Thu Aug 25 10:51:43 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zji8i/so_i_might_be_hospitalized/
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Oh dear god I'm sorry that all my contributions are like this, but I'm shaking and scared and can't do this.
Had to go to the gastroenterologist today. I thought that after all the slews of appointments I'd be fine because I don't feel the effects of malnutrition (I've never felt fatigued, or fainted, or anything like that, always took vitamins, could keep up physically with everyone else, etc.) and then eventually I'd be left alone - I even checked my heart rate at home and it was fine - but apparently my heart rate is low and the doctor was concerned enough to move my blood test from routine to stat and if the results are abnormal, I may have to go to the emergency room for more tests, and then if the results are no good they may start talking about hospitalizing me. And then weight gain is guaranteed. I wanted to fake it as much as possible, and then make it as slow as possible, but now everything hinges on this fucking blood test. And then, even afterwards, even if my blood's okay, even if I fake weight gain with water loading and weights, how am I supposed to fake things like a heartbeat and blood pressure? And they want me to gain 30 pounds, how the hell am I supposed to fake gain 30 pounds permanently?
It is so fucking hard saying that the weight loss was unintentional and that yes, I want to gain weight, but a normal person would say that, right? And the doctor asked if I was suddenly back at my starting weight, would I be fine with it, and I didn't know how to respond because I didn't know how a normal person would respond, and...
I am so fucking scared of gaining weight. And additionally, I'm actually just not physically able to eat more a good deal of the time, it's not just me restricting - I straight up get full, and then sick. It took me an hour to eat a cut-up boiled egg and less than half an Asian pear because of lack of appetite. So I'm anticipating getting yelled at a lot more for that. My father wants me to eat every hour on the hour. Fuck. Fucking fuck. I don't think I'm even physically capable of doing that.
The gastroenterologist said she's just there for medical concerns, and said that it could be that I wanted to lose weight and my body's appetite adjusted subconsciously (lmao) or that my appetite lowered naturally and I started losing weight and went "well this is what I wanted anyway", and gave me another doctor who "sees patients [like me] all the time, with the eating." Does she suspect ED? I don't know what normal naturally underweight people are like, fuck.
I'm trying really, really hard not to reveal anything about my disordered eating habits, but the thing is I don't know what's a part of the ED and what's a part of me anymore. I *do* have a much smaller appetite now and get full off a small amount. I'd naturally rather *not* eat than eat (until I start eating then I'm fucked lmao). If I'm stressed or scared or anxious I *don't* want to eat or feel sick eating or just don't get hungry, but I don't want those things to be treated, so should I even tell them? Are those things indicative of an ED to a doctor's eyes? How else can I explain 50 pound weight loss in a year beyond just saying it was unintentional and that I lost my appetite? They want to give me appetite increasing pills and if I was a normal person who wanted to be healthy I would take them but *I do not want to take those goddamn pills*. At this point, I probably medically need them, but...
I want to fake the weight gain as much as possible and slow it all down as much as possible, but if I get hospitalized the hell can I do? And even if not, I can't keep water loading and sodium-carb loading and putting coins in pockets forever, not for such a large amount of weight. And there's the problem of being able to restrict in the first place when everyone's watching my food intake like a goddamn hawk - trying as much as I could to restrict, I still weighed in at 71 lbs today. I have to go behind my parents' backs to pretend I'm eating and throw out food. The doctor said that if I can't show that I can gain the weight on my own, it will eventually come down to the food tube, and I can't fucking let that happen, but if real weight gain is inevitable... Aghh, fuck.
This is a mess and identical to everything else I've posted in this subreddit, I'm sorry for constantly trying your guys' patience. What's messing with me more is that my doctor is... As thin as me. Even thinner, possibly. Fucking hell.
The only upside of all of this is that my psychologist (that my father outed me to without any word to me) thinks that maybe I was subconsciously eating less because I'm "scared of getting a grown woman's body". Hah, subconsciously.
[Intro] Re-introduction
/u/Mi__ra [165cm |49 kg | 18.22 | 0 | F]
Created: Thu Aug 25 10:50:05 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zjhy1/reintroduction/
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Hi,
It's been a couple months since I've been active here. I had username Mi_ra, if someone happens to remember me. I tried recovery, but it really didn't work out. I realised how fat I've gotten - I weigh about 49 kg(108 lbs) at 165cm(5'5') and really don't feel comfortable with that.
But if you don't remember me: I'm almost 30, English isn't my first language, I binge and purge a lot.
I'm happy to be back, you still seem as awesome as I remember you!
[Discussion] Daily Food Diary! August 25, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Thu Aug 25 10:02:25 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zj8m0/daily_food_diary_august_25_2016/
---
This is a daily food diary thread for August 25, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
When co-worker jokes I should stop losing weight before I get anorexic
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Aug 25 09:53:15 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zj6tx/when_coworker_jokes_i_should_stop_losing_weight/
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https://www.google.co.uk/search?q=awkward+laughter+gif+imgur&client=ms-android-h3g-gb&hl=en-GB&prmd=ivn&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwiOj-rE9dzOAhWiIsAKHV0RDjwQ_AUIBygB&biw=360&bih=561#imgrc=tAwaiiOhRcjJ7M%3A
[Other] I recorded my b/p day again
/u/anonymousbrahette [5'6'' | CW 163 |]
Created: Thu Aug 25 09:46:37 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zj5lc/i_recorded_my_bp_day_again/
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fxYlxGV0rQs&feature=youtu.be
[Rant/Rave] No. Stop pls.
/u/avocadorable [5'3.5" | 103.8 | 18.53 | -37 | F]
Created: Thu Aug 25 09:46:11 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zj5i9/no_stop_pls/
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So to set the stage for my rant: I was making soup last night, a light veggie chicken soup. And my bf comes up behind me and eats a spoonful of the soup. Sure, yes I'm glad you're excited for soup. But now my measurements are all off and I can't figure out how what amount of cals were removed from my soup. Ugh. I feel ridiculous getting upset over this, I know it's practically negligible calories.
But I weighed everything and now it's ruined. Fuck.
I ended up having fruit instead, and just said I ate from the pot while it was cooking. :( I'm fine to share food that I make, just let me know first so I can portion it properly.
[Intro] new throwaway account !! ♡
/u/shortleggedbeastie [5'2" | 169.8 | 32.1 | -16 | 20F | GW 100]
Created: Thu Aug 25 09:42:28 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zj4v1/new_throwaway_account/
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hello everyone it's /u/littlegayalien!!
i'm only a semi-active contributer of content but you may have seen my comments floating around on a few posts
i figured i should probably make a throwaway/ed account so i didn't get caught hahaaa
[Help] What is a diagnosable medical condition I could fake having?
/u/mermaid_puppy [5'11" | 137lb | UGW 115 | F]
Created: Thu Aug 25 09:32:51 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zj30j/what_is_a_diagnosable_medical_condition_i_could/
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On mobile, will flair soon!
Basically, if friends and family ask why I'm not eating, I'd like to have a solid excuse. No one questions a medical diagnosis. While I'm aware it's none of their business and I shouldn't have to share my medical history, the reality is I'm close with my social groups. Sharing personal details of our lives is normal, so if I only told them "I'm basing my diet off my doctor's recommendations; I'd rather not discuss it" that would raise red flags.
So lovelies, any ideas for a realistic medical condition that isn't too icky/personal that would throw people off my track?
[Rant/Rave] Woke up, cramps bloating. It's shark week
/u/stephanynotstokes [5'6 |Weight Lost: 70 lbs | F]
Created: Thu Aug 25 09:19:52 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zj0kh/woke_up_cramps_bloating_its_shark_week/
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And I am SO hungry. I'm tying to keep it light with yogurt, and a little bit of cereal but all I can think about is food food food. I can't wait for this to be over. I'm finally steadily loosing weight I don't wanna go back to gaining. On the plus side, getting my period means I'll be sleepy most of the day, and I don't have work or school until next week so I have time to rest.
Hope everyone else is doing okay!
[Rant/Rave] Collarbones
/u/Jackysuave [5'4" | 136 | 23.34 | F]
Created: Thu Aug 25 09:01:02 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zix1o/collarbones/
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School had me at such a stress I gave in to eating many fried foods and gained a lot of body fat. I was at a healthy, power lifting weight before all this. (Little overweight BMI, but my body was all muscle because of all the heavy weights I lifted.) I suddenly lost all that muscle and my body just looked gross.
I thought I was over my ED. I thought I finally conquered this fucking demon.
Though I haven't lost much weight from that point, I remember one day at my dorm, staring at my body as I realized I couldn't see my collarbones (the ultimate fatness), had a round face, and cellulite all over my legs. As soon as summer came, I ate less bad food, nonetheless, still ate a ton, but now I can actually see my collarbones.
Collarbones, one of the reasons I realized I could lose weight.
Collarbones? At such a high weight, though?
I want to be happy but I'm still incredibly massive. I want my thighs to stop rubbing together and my stomach to curve in again. I want all my clothes to feel massive again. I can't believe I stopped trying to lose weight when I reached a plateau. I'm mad I learned not only how to eat, but how I used it for comfort. I'm uncomfortable in myself, and I need to be able to see more than just my collarbones.
[Rant/Rave] today sucks.
/u/thelonelykitten_
Created: Thu Aug 25 08:46:10 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4ziuaa/today_sucks/
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My anxiety is through the fucking roof and work is crazy. Nobody knows how to do their job here and I'm stuck cleaning up everybody else's mistakes. If I don't eat, I won't feel like such a complete failure today.
[Goal] Back here after a long break, and treading the waters carefully...posting for accountability
/u/throwawaytodayokc [5'4.25" |96.2|16.7|-22 since 8/2015]
Created: Thu Aug 25 08:38:55 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zisyi/back_here_after_a_long_break_and_treading_the/
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So I posted a pic yesterday, at the weight of 97.4 lbs a few days ago and got some guesses above 100 lbs.
Pic here: http://i.imgur.com/q6odXWL.jpg
Not that big of deal, and I'm not sure when 100 lbs became "too much" in my eyes, but it is. 96.2 today and that small difference is a relief.
I've been out of treatment for about three weeks now, and am slowly losing. I do want recovery. I want a normal life, to be in a relationship, etc. etc. But I also want to be thin, too thin, enough to find the caves on my body and the rush of accomplishment.
I am aiming to be 93 lbs, and then I swear I will just maintain. That's so close, and I can still eat a decent amount to appear normal at that weight. I'm posting here for accountability. I will try to follow my set meal plan only subtracting components of it to lose weight.
But I will NOT have fear foods, foods i cut out, and yes, I'll eat dessert. I have found this mindset the key to reducing my binging and purging. I eat bread now, can have Oreos, pizza and you what, I am okay with that. So I am slightly recovery oriented but obviously not --but this is my choice, and some shit comment my therapist said the other day confirms that I look like I weigh more than I do.
Back here after a long break, and treading the waters carefully...posting for accountability
/u/throwawaytodayokc [5'4.25" |96.2|16.7|-22 since 8/2015]
Created: Thu Aug 25 08:38:44 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zisxg/back_here_after_a_long_break_and_treading_the/
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So I posted a pic yesterday, at the weight of 97.4 lbs and got some guesses above 100 lbs. Not that big of deal, and I'm not sure when 100 lbs became "too much" in my eyes, but it is.
I've been out of treatment for about three weeks now, and am slowly losing. I do want recovery. I want a normal life, to be in a relationship, etc. etc. But I also want to be thin, too thin, enough to find the caves on my body and the rush of accomplishment.
I am aiming to be 93 lbs, and then I swear I will just maintain. That's so close, and I can still eat a decent amount to appear normal at that weight. I'm posting here for accountability. I will try to follow my set meal plan only subtracting components of it to lose weight.
But I will NOT have fear foods, foods i cut out, and yes, I'll eat dessert. I have found this mindset the key to reducing my binging and purging. I eat bread now, can have Oreos, pizza and you what, I am okay with that. So I am slightly recovery oriented but obviously not --but this is my choice, and some shit comment my therapist said the other day confirms that I look like I weigh more than I do.
[Help] Going to my mom's trailer for a day, so anxious about eating
/u/throwawaynm88 [Height 5'3.5"| CW 114.6 lbs| BMI 20| SW 125 lbs| GW 100 lbs]
Created: Thu Aug 25 07:33:48 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zii0o/going_to_my_moms_trailer_for_a_day_so_anxious/
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Well, I've been doing good on a diet of protein shakes for breakfast, lunch and snack, and raw veggies for dinner.. I've been losing close to 1 lb a day all week now.. Tomorrow night, I have to go to my mom's trailer. I considered saying no, but my kids are going and I want to be there with them.
I can get away with my normal eating tomorrow all day, and say I already had dinner by the time we leave. But, not binging is harder around my family for some reason. Also, I can probably get away with just a shake for breakfast and one secretly for lunch, by saying the benzo withdrawal I'm going through is making me nauseous.. I can skip snack, but I'm going to have to sit down and have dinner.. maybe I can get away with barely eating if I stick to saying I feel sick.. I don't know.. but I am having constant anxiety over having to eat differently than normal.. I'm afraid I will gain back the 9 lbs I've lost and have to start over again..
[Help] [Help] Jello dilemma!
/u/Im_A_Whale_AMA [5'3.5" | bloated whale, will update | GW: 100 | UGW: 80 lbs | F]
Created: Thu Aug 25 06:52:28 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zibik/help_jello_dilemma/
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So I was making some sugar-free Jello, and I made two servings - one 1/2 cup serving and one cup serving. The serving size is listed as 1/4 of the package, which makes 1/2 cup of Jello.
Being the ED-driven weirdo that I am, I measured out the Jello on my food scale. The 1/2 cup was 3.2 oz and the full cup of 8.45 oz.
I know my 1/2 was a bit skimpy, which is probably why though don't add up, but that doesn't matter because I have weight readings, right?
Apparently not. The package doesn't list the per-ounce caloric value of the Jello, so now I have no idea how many of the 40 calories I am ingesting.
Does anyone know a way to find out how many calories are in each serving, exactly? I'm having a bit of anxiety attack over this, so sorry that this is so specific and weird, but I really need to know.
Thanks in advance, lovelies <3
[Help] Nighttime vs Daytime Eating ??!
/u/citrus_cunt
Created: Thu Aug 25 06:52:06 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zibge/nighttime_vs_daytime_eating/
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!!! Aaugh!! I need help with my eating plan because it is getting ridiculous...
I'm able to fast almost all day with no issues now. (I can last until 6:00 pm everyday with no food.) So i'll restrict until dinner and then eat something small and satisfying like a ~700 kcal meal.
....but then I go back to my dorm, and stay up until 10:00 - 11:00 pm eating all sorts of shit with my suite mates. Last night I ate three bags of popcorn- *THREE WHOLE BAGS* not to mention several candybars and a horrific amount of mints. It's like I can't stop myself, my body just screams at me to eat.
should I keep trying to restrict like this, especially bc it benefits my class schedule, or should I try eating more meals? What would keep me more satisfied?
Should I just fight it and get better at restricting, or do I need a better meal plan? Halp!!
[Discussion] Weekly Emotional Support August 25, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Thu Aug 25 06:02:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zi4q1/weekly_emotional_support_august_25_2016/
---
We're almost all dealing with quite stressful things outside of our eating disorders. Whether it be complicated relationships, friends, university, work or other mental illnesses like depression, anxiety or OCD, we all seem to be having a rougher time emotionally and mentally than the general population.
Use this thread to post about your problems or ask for advice concerning things other than EDs/ED behaviors.
**As always, follow the sub rules when reading or posting.**
*****
^Weekly ^emotional ^well-being ^and ^support ^threads ^are ^posted ^every ^Thursday.
^Have ^any ^questions ^or ^concerns? ^Comment ^below, ^or [^PM ^the ^mods.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FproED)
[Help] At what point is it "real" weight coming off?
/u/NindeNehima [5'2" | 95.5 | 18.06 | F]
Created: Thu Aug 25 05:32:36 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zi0xa/at_what_point_is_it_real_weight_coming_off/
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Hi everyone,
Hope everyone is having a lovely Thursday, I'm glad the week is almost over! I am currently weighing myself every morning and for the last two weeks it's been steadily going down from ~100 to now 94.6. I doubt I've actually lost 5 lbs, some or all must be water weight. How long do I need to maintain/keep dropping in weight until I know it's real weight loss?
I don't feel much skinnier, though my size 0 jeans are now a bit big so I'll have to get out my other pants that I convinced myself I was too fat to wear.
I don't know if I worded all of this correctly, hopefully it makes sense! Any thoughts/opinions appreciated :)
[Rant/Rave] I gave in
/u/fattymcfatface1 [1.8m/5'11" | 74.1/164lb | 22.9 | 12.9kg/28.7lb | 30f]
Created: Thu Aug 25 05:03:10 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zhxof/i_gave_in/
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[RANT] And had a bag of 8cal (60g) lettuce on day 4 of my 14 day water/coffee fast.
Should I start from the beginning now?
Aaah! The light-headedness was just too much on this very hot day!
On mobile can't flair!
[Rant/Rave] So, according to the adaptive TDEE spreadsheet, my TDEE is ~1700.
/u/kpatable [5'9" | 125.4 | 18.2/18.5 | -21.9 | F]
Created: Thu Aug 25 04:56:55 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zhx2g/so_according_to_the_adaptive_tdee_spreadsheet_my/
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I input weeks of past data. There are a lot of gaps, though, so I'm still going to see how things unfold in the next few weeks. But I'm now aiming for 1600 calories a day.
This will be kind of difficult at this point. I'm used to eating more than that.
I read a statistic that said the average amount of calories Americans overeat every day is 300. That's about how much I have been eating (and more than that, often enough). I don't want to be that statistic. I can't be. I can't be one of those people who gains weight slowly as they approach middle age. That is NOT acceptable. At all.
But now I know how much I need to eat. I *know*. So I won't have as much trouble resisting a bedtime snack knowing that I've eaten my allotted calories for the day. I'm going to break this emotional connection I have with food. I'm going to do it.
Thank you for reading. I appreciate it.
[Rant/Rave] DEAR DIARY
/u/bloodketosexmagic
Created: Thu Aug 25 04:08:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zhs2w/dear_diary/
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I have a skype interview with a company overseas this afternoon so naturally im avoiding confronting it by distracting myself with food. I just had my days worth of calories in an hour... 10 am - 11am. And im going to the gym tonight to train legs. Wehhhh.
End rant :C
[Other] Really powerful thing just happened
/u/High_as_red [5'3 | F]
Created: Thu Aug 25 04:01:07 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zhram/really_powerful_thing_just_happened/
---
I put out all the ingredients to make my fave 1000 cal sandwich. But put them all back. I don't want to hate myself today.
[Tip] Tip from my dentist, chew xylitol gum!
/u/lightfeathers
Created: Thu Aug 25 03:59:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zhr67/tip_from_my_dentist_chew_xylitol_gum/
---
It apparently helps avoid cavities and the like.
Idk if this well help us since most of our teeth are weak because of deficiency in some nutrients but it doesn't hurt to try, I guess. I would choose calories in gum over cavities! Although I haven't looked up how much calories there are in xylitol gum haha
I looked it up and this is what I saw
http://www.freysmiles.com/blog/view/xylitol-gum-a-guide-for-new-moms-everyone-else
[Intro] Back on the ED road
/u/voidnasp [153cm | CW 64kg | 28.78 | -4kg | F]
Created: Thu Aug 25 02:19:21 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zhha7/back_on_the_ed_road/
---
Hi everyone. I've been lurking on this sub for as long as I know reddit, but never really post except once, so, here I am !
I don't know why but I feel like this is the community I always needed, with people who won't judge me or call me liar because I am an overweight with ED. I never talked about it to anyone, except a few friends that know about it, but I can't really say things like "damn I ate under X cal today I feel so proud" to them so, yeah, maybe this is the right place for me. I'm currently back at restricting a lot and trying to lose weight and even if I know I could and I should try to recover and accept myself, this is not what I want for now
I've never been good with these intro thing but thank you for having me here.
Also, forgive me if some of my sentences won't make sense, English is not my mothertongue, but I try to make my best !
[Discussion] Why can't we sleep during the night and/or morning?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Aug 25 01:46:39 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zhe75/why_cant_we_sleep_during_the_night_andor_morning/
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[deleted]
[Meme/Humor] My Fitbit's logic on weight loss is the same as mine
/u/FaithHopeTrick [5'7 | CW 123 GW 119 |19.20 | -32lbs | F]
Created: Thu Aug 25 00:26:06 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zh69z/my_fitbits_logic_on_weight_loss_is_the_same_as/
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https://imgur.com/a/QTsDf
[Thinspo] I should start lifting more!
/u/pineapplesandham [5'3 | 97 lbs | 17.6 | -10 lbs | F]
Created: Wed Aug 24 22:34:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zgscv/i_should_start_lifting_more/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/51d7168ca4f64192a5c2b73f1e3a6073?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=e4fe1aa9231fab92e4faba70194025ff
[Help] Questions about fasting
/u/lovemyfragilebones [5'2" | 105 | 19.2/19.89 | -5 | gq 19]
Created: Wed Aug 24 22:25:28 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zgr95/questions_about_fasting/
---
I have a few health issues that complicate my fasts. So far the longest I've ever been able to fast (while not ill) was 2-3 days. This has been when I was at college and dosing large amounts of caffeine to stay awake/energized.
I have what seem to be mild heart problems, which can be aggravated when fasting, especially if I exercise during. Additionally, if I go too long without eating, I can get very dizzy, mentally foggy, shaky, 'buzzy,' nauseated, or disoriented. Sometimes I find I must lie down and cannot get up (in which instance I ask someone around me to bring me a small amount of food.) This issue seems to be with blood sugar. I talked to my psychiatrist about it briefly while discussing medication. He said it's not abnormal for young, petite, AFAB (Assigned Female At Birth) people, which I am. The time frame for this can be a couple of days, or a couple of hours.
I would be immensely grateful if anyone could give me advice on how to fast whilst being mindful of these issues. My current practice is to fast with an amount of 'easy' food close by (e.g., cereal, yogurt, juice) to raise my blood sugar/settle my stomach if need be.
Lastly, when I break my fast, I find myself prone to strong cravings, and often eat quite a bit of a food or foods which probably aren't the best for breaking a fast (and I often give myself a stomachache because I don't re-introduce food slowly enough). I would like to end my fasts with small amounts of healthy food for a couple of days before returning to eating 'normally'. Would anyone have any advice for re-introducing food at a slow/moderate rate, and for overcoming cravings?
Thank you!
Edit: Heart isn't really an issue, healthwise. I've been to some doctors and they're not particularly concerned; also I make sure to manage my potassium and electrolytes, and I use my inhaler more regularly than I used to. I mostly added in the bit about my heart because when the blood sugar thing happens, if my heart gets fluttery or weird then it adds an extra layer of discomfort; also because sometimes my heart doing The Thing can prompt anxiety and I like to try to keep that to a minimum.
[Tip] Restricting/Fasting Tips?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Aug 24 21:47:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zgm79/restrictingfasting_tips/
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[deleted]
[Help] Recently developed an ED and I dont think I'm handling it well
/u/Polarlol [6'3" | CW 177 | BMI 20.8 | -33 | M | GW 170]
Created: Wed Aug 24 21:43:26 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zglj6/recently_developed_an_ed_and_i_dont_think_im/
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About 2 months ago this girl I was fwb with said "Youre in really good shape, i bet if you leaned out you could get down to 185" (Was 210, lifting 6 days a week in good shape.) I've had really bad anxiety my entire life, and something about the way she said it just made me really unhappy with where I was. SO I basically quit eating and kept lifting. Been staying around 900 calories a day recently. But I constantly feel exhausted, on the verge of passing out. I feel good about it though. How do you guys manage this?
[Discussion] Buying clothing to wear at your GW/UGW
/u/montagemontage [5'4" | CW: 🐮 | GW: 95 | -15 | f]
Created: Wed Aug 24 20:31:01 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zgayc/buying_clothing_to_wear_at_your_gwugw/
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Do you do it? I hadn't until today -- I was thrifting with a friend and found the most beautiful, tiny vintage dress. I'm not sure if having this dress in my closet will end up being a motivator or a trigger -- guess only time will tell! I sure hope it will be the former.
[Help] I'm losing it. This is a nightmare.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Aug 24 20:14:13 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zg8cq/im_losing_it_this_is_a_nightmare/
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[deleted]
Do I really look like this? I don't know if I am satisfied or not.
/u/isurvivedthetruck
Created: Wed Aug 24 19:54:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zg5d9/do_i_really_look_like_this_i_dont_know_if_i_am/
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http://i.imgur.com/iGfqGHE.jpg
[Meme/Humor] MFP entries are way too real
/u/CharChar12 [5' 9.5 |140lbs|21| Male]
Created: Wed Aug 24 19:53:26 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zg555/mfp_entries_are_way_too_real/
---
http://imgur.com/K4kQo68
Does anyone else get nauseous?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Aug 24 19:43:12 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zg3jp/does_anyone_else_get_nauseous/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] That moment when you promise yourself you'll stop bingeing...
/u/starry_daydreamer [4'11" | 99 lbs | 21.2 | F]
Created: Wed Aug 24 19:21:15 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zg03s/that_moment_when_you_promise_yourself_youll_stop/
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...only to go shopping and realize it's mooncake season.
Fuck.
[Rant/Rave] NSV that's going to sound ridiculous...
/u/pungentthrowaway [5'1" | CW: 154 | -13 | F]
Created: Wed Aug 24 18:59:25 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zfwr8/nsv_thats_going_to_sound_ridiculous/
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I can comfortably get into the fetal position again! Haha that's so pathetic but that's usually how I sleep and is just generally a really comfortable and calming position for me to lie in, and my belly had gotten so big that I couldn't easily pull my knees to my chest anymore. It's also usually how I sit in chairs and it bothered me so much that I even told my therapist about it because I wanted to pull my knees up to my chest while on the couch and got really frustrated that I couldn't.
So yeah, that feels super silly but there it is. I'm so motivated to eat as little as possible tonight so I can continue to shrink into a tinier and tinier little ball.
(NSV = Non Scale Victory)
[Thinspo] Some anti-thinspo for everyone
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Aug 24 18:49:27 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zfv6n/some_antithinspo_for_everyone/
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https://www.facebook.com/KingAssune/videos/1585682065059607/
[Tip] PBfit+chocolate halo top = dream combo
/u/turtle4president [5'2" | 106.2 | 20.12 | F/20]
Created: Wed Aug 24 18:47:44 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zfux4/pbfitchocolate_halo_top_dream_combo/
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(Flair as rant)
today I had such a sweet tooth... Ate a snickers mini (42cals), a dark Milky Way mini (38cals) , 4 small pieces of dark chocolate (100cals), 1 piece milk chocolate (53cals)..... Holy hell.
anyway, after dinner I had ~300cals to spare in my budget. there was 1/2 pint of chocolate halo top in the freezer, so I started to eat some and realized how boring it tasted by itself.
Noticed my mom had a container of PBfit in the pantry — like the Costco size... Never tried the powdered PB till now and wow, holy fuck, it's amazing.
Mixed up some and was eating it with the chocolate halo top......... for a total of 170cals I am really satisfied. Never eating regular peanut butter again ❤️
[Rant/Rave] I'm so happy today is almost over. I feel like I'm on the edge of losing it. Everything feels so dark.
/u/fckk [5'4| CW 120lbs | 20.60 | GW 115 | F]
Created: Wed Aug 24 17:23:13 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zfh3c/im_so_happy_today_is_almost_over_i_feel_like_im/
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Last night in the middle of the night I binged HARD. A huge bowl of cereal and milk drowned in maple syrup WTF (I do not drink milk, ever) on top of 4 pieces of pizza, toast and butter, and a motherfucking hot pocket dipped in ranch. Among other tid bits like cheese itz and cookies. Holy fuck. I feel nauseated typing that and disgusted reading it. I barely even remember what I scarfed down. This morning I had to wake up really early (like 4 hours after said binge ended) and work. I felt...horrible. Lethargic, sad, hungover, bloated, achey, heartburn, etc.
So.....I designated today a "binge day" because I was too tired to "start over" today and too sad to find motivation to "make up for it" or even "just move forward". I felt fucking awful and sick and heart broken. I broke myself last night with that binge. Well, holy fuck, today felt like literal hell. Some kind of HELL surrounds me when I designate a "binge day". I think about what I'm going to eat CONSTANTLY since anything is up for grabs and I usually stick to a strict 5 safe-foods diet. The thing is, I didn't even WANT half the shit I binged on today. I ate it, not tasting it, feeling sick and full, but kept eating it because it was "my chance too". I even snuck into the back freezer at work and stole cookies and shoved them in the waistband of my jeans and hid the bumps with my apron so I could binge on them in the car on the way home. Who am I, that's literally horrific and humiliating and extremely disordered.
I hate today. I hate this binge day. I feel so out of control right now and so deeply wounded. I feel so alone, I want to kill myself. I don't want this life for me but I'll keep living it for those that love me. My boyfriend knew about my ED at one point (I just told him because I was spiraling and he knew something was up but didn't know what) but he hasn't asked me "how I am" in a few weeks (I suspect he either didn't find it that serious because I'm so good at hiding it and maybe he forgot...or he feels uncomfortable by it and is avoiding it) and I'm done venting to him about it. He'll never understand. It's not his fault...no one can possibly understanding the significance of "over-eating" or "Eating a non-safe food" or "restriction mania". Like, who can possibly understand the mental significance of those things. So I'm not telling him anymore, and i'm not telling anyone. I feel so alone. No one knows, not my family, not my co-workers, not my best friends. No one knows today was hell...endless hell. That I inflicted on myself. What animals do this in the wild? How did we evolve to self-destruct to the point of wanting to escape via suicide? I'm so disordered, I'm so tired, I'm so sad.
I want to be like, 5 years old again, curled up in my mom's arms naive and free. I will be a prisoner to this cycle forever. I'm not CHOOSING an extreme diet, or CHOOSING to stay thin. I'm a captive to a series of disordered thoughts that own me. They cripple me. I'm unable to leave my bed right now. I'm unable to spark happiness within myself.
DISCLAIMER: I will not kill myself, this is NOT a cry for help, I have a nephew who needs me far more than anything I'll ever need. And my lovely parents need me to care for them. I'm just expressing my deep sadness at this disorder. Thank you for listening.
[Help] that one pro-ana website with loads of really low cal recipes (possibly a blog??)
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Aug 24 17:07:10 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zfeg4/that_one_proana_website_with_loads_of_really_low/
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[deleted]
[Other] Only one pic, sorry...guess my weight? I'm about 5' 4.25" and need help being more focused on goals
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Aug 24 16:57:44 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zfctg/only_one_pic_sorryguess_my_weight_im_about_5_425/
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http://imgur.com/MqKniDn
[Intro] Boredzoi--->citrus_cunt
/u/citrus_cunt
Created: Wed Aug 24 16:46:59 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zfb0p/boredzoicitrus_cunt/
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I'm back lovelies!!!!
[Discussion] Can you trace your ED back to the tipping point event?
/u/kpatable [5'9" | 125.1 | 18.1/18.5 | -21.9 | F]
Created: Wed Aug 24 16:36:16 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zf97b/can_you_trace_your_ed_back_to_the_tipping_point/
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I'll explain. When I was 12, my dentist told me to eat less sugar, as I'd just had 5 cavities filled at once. This was the event that tipped me over into developing disordered eating and eventually a full blown eating disorder. Yes, I was predisposed to developing one because of lots of other factors, but that was the tipping point, you know? If my dentist hadn't stressed that so much, I wouldn't have started all the behaviors that led me to developing an eating disorder. At least not at that time. Can anyone else trace their ED back to one of these moments?
[Help] ECA stack (gross question)
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Aug 24 16:31:35 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zf8f6/eca_stack_gross_question/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] Just broke out of binging after two weeks, just thought to share my new progress to 90lbs!
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Aug 24 16:09:20 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zf4lx/just_broke_out_of_binging_after_two_weeks_just/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] Eating during the day dilemma
/u/itsgettingexhausting [5'4"| CW103.6| 17.78| -6.8lbs| Female]
Created: Wed Aug 24 15:30:27 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zexu6/eating_during_the_day_dilemma/
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Have you felt this dilemma?
* If I don't eat during the day I'm ravished at night and more likely to eat bad foods
* If I eat during the day I might still eat bad foods at night
I should just not eat ever. The struggle is real.
No sign of a thigh gap :/
/u/throwaway03199519 [5'6 | CW 119.4 | GW 110| 19.35| -16.6 | F]
Created: Wed Aug 24 15:29:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zexqw/no_sign_of_a_thigh_gap/
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Hey all! So my flair is off and I'm around 117-118 pounds and it doesn't look like a true thigh gap is gonna happen anytime soon. Im 5'6. If my thigh fat tends to store in my inner thighs, will I never have a true thigh gap? Any thigh gap info will be helpful, thanks :)
[Meme/Humor] Dietary Shitstorm
/u/properlylit [5'4" | fattie | F]
Created: Wed Aug 24 15:10:18 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zeu8j/dietary_shitstorm/
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[removed]
[Discussion] get a replacement flex, or wait for the new one?
/u/hayleystark [5'4"|NB]
Created: Wed Aug 24 14:54:15 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zergu/get_a_replacement_flex_or_wait_for_the_new_one/
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hi all,
my flex died completely today. i've heard a lot about the new flex coming out soon (yay!) and i love the look of it. i really want to get it when it comes out and didn't think mine would die (i JUST got this replacement less than 2 months ago :( ), so i havent saved yet.
i have a hard time making decisions and i'm too embarrassed by my history to post this is the fitbit reddit (i don't want to link it at all in case there's some way they can find me? lol) so i'm asking you all!
thanks :(
[Help] cannot go on like this
/u/tartansheep [5'10 | 143lb|20.3 | -13lb| F]
Created: Wed Aug 24 14:32:26 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zenh5/cannot_go_on_like_this/
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hey guys
oh my god. so been eating disordered since 2011 or so, i'm 20. was diagnosed atypical anorexic at one point but now i'm so so fucking fat i cannot believe i was ever diagnosed. but i can't seem to starve like I used to!
I need to lose 30lb. As fast as possible. And I need the motivation to do it. I wanna lose it in eight to ten weeks. And I've got to lose at least 10lb before uni starts in a month but it's so hard at home.
Going on a keto diet (bipolar so have an excuse! the meds made me so fat i stopped taking them) and going to stop drinking. and stop binging, fucking hell. my binges are never more than 1000 calories but even so. i hate eating above 1000. fuuuck.
help ! !!
[Help] Really upset with myself.
/u/KillingKylie [5'5| Piggy|-25|F|GW: 97]
Created: Wed Aug 24 14:28:10 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zempe/really_upset_with_myself/
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I don't know what happened. I have been restricting effortlessly to the point where I had to make an actual effort to eat 500 calories a day. The last two days I have binged (yesterday 1,152 calories and 1,800 today) and purged.
I never purge, purging is not my thing. If anything I would spend 3 hours at the gym, but this time I purged and am going to the gym for a few hours.
I don't know what to do, I feel so ashamed for both my intake and the purging. I kind of want to die right now. Not to mention the progress I lost and the disappointment I have brought upon my family. (Did I mention my fiancé came home an hour early and walked in on me throwing up?)
What do I do? Help 😭😭😭
[Intro] I'm sorry for clogging up the front page, I just thought I could introduce myself?
/u/TemporaryAccount_101 [5'3'' | AHAHAH | -5.5kgs | 18F]
Created: Wed Aug 24 13:23:41 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zean0/im_sorry_for_clogging_up_the_front_page_i_just/
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Hello Lovelies.
Some of you may know me, and most of you do not. I made this account because I didn't want people to trace down my main one.
As for the name. I didn't think I was gonna use it so much, so I guess it stuck ahah
You can just call me Temp or Tempo (like those horrible tempo runs ahah).
Mmh, I guess I wanted to make my official way into this lovely community c:
We all know why we are here, but I don't mind answering some questions you may have, if at all.
TL;DR Hy, I've been lurking for a while, it's nice to finally meet you all, sorry if it's not the appropriate time. Please call me Temp or Tempo. Hope we'll get along c:
[Rant/Rave] C/Sed for the first time
/u/yummmies [5'4" | 130 | -35 | F]
Created: Wed Aug 24 11:33:34 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zdqfm/csed_for_the_first_time/
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I feel awful. There was leftover cake in the fridge, and I just gave myself a huge slice and c/sed it. I felt so out of control, rushing the cake back into my cubical, getting tissues, shoveling it into my mouth then immediately spitting it back out. It gave me so much *anxiety* to be eating this, to do this, to waste food, to risk someone knowing. The worst part was that in a moment of clarity, I decided I needed to pay the price of having cake, and I started swallowing it, only to remember that I don't like cake??? I c/sed so much of something, probably gaining calories from it, even though I could've avoided it completely because I don't like cake??? What was the point of that?? Why did I do that?? Why was I so out of control. Ugh :(((
First day studying nutrition
/u/AmAlreadyGoingToHell
Created: Wed Aug 24 11:27:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zdp1x/first_day_studying_nutrition/
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I felt so so obvious. I had an apple for lunch while they all had these pasta salads and such. They did the "taste" test (involving; sugary drinks, crackers, crisps and skittles) while I told them I don't want to eat too much processed food and already had my share for breakfast.. God, I hope this gets easier.
[Tip] 130 cal/18g protein cinnamon bun meal replacement smoothie! So delicious!
/u/goddamnroommate [5'6" | 143.1 | 23.17 | -50ish | F]
Created: Wed Aug 24 11:17:32 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zdnuf/130_cal18g_protein_cinnamon_bun_meal_replacement/
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http://imgur.com/a/LyQfT
[Discussion] Planning a binge
/u/capture_the_excite [164cm | 55kg | 20.4 | F]
Created: Wed Aug 24 10:31:55 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zdg80/planning_a_binge/
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Yesterday, I ate an entire cheese pizza. Surprisingly, it only worked out to 1440 kcals (I have to get it without sauce since I'm allergic to tomatoes). I'd been wanting to do it since last week and decided it would be a good idea to get it out of my system. Now I'm back on track and find it much easier to restrict.
Does anybody else have planned binges? Sometimes I feel like I need them but the whole concept of a binge is that you're out of control so it feels weird.
[Discussion] Those who developed an ED later on in life, how did it start?
/u/trapqueenB [5'4 | 134 lb | 23 | -30 lb | F/22]
Created: Wed Aug 24 10:27:49 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zdfi3/those_who_developed_an_ed_later_on_in_life_how/
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I never thought I would have an ED. It seemed to me that this was something you developed at a young age. However, I am 22 and developed ed tendencies or whatever this past year. So, for people on the same boat... what started yours?
Edit: I thought I should share how mine started since I am asking :)
Senior year of high school I got on birth control and completely stopped doing sports so I gained like 30 lbs. At my heaviest I believe I was about 165. Sophomore year of college I decided to start exercising again and went down to 152. Finals really messed up my schedule and by the end of the school year I was 146. I came back home for the summer and everyone was surprised at how much weight I had lost even though I didn't really realize it was happening. I was so happy and felt so much better! Jeans fit me again! I continued to exercise and eat relatively healthily and went down to 142 and I couldn't have been happier! After a year at this weight though I became very unsatisfied. The novelty wore off and I no longer felt great. I wanted to lose more. I lost more weight during finals again and went down to 139. I was unknowingly restricting because I was just so busy. When I realized it was the very low calorie intake that was helping me lose weight the restricting/binging cycle began. Now I'm here. Yayyy....
[Discussion] Daily Food Diary! August 24, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Wed Aug 24 10:02:32 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zdbam/daily_food_diary_august_24_2016/
---
This is a daily food diary thread for August 24, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
[Rant/Rave] Boring rant
/u/H2OandCaffeine [5ft7 | FAT | -15 lbs | F]
Created: Wed Aug 24 09:20:51 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zd3ma/boring_rant/
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Starting from a really high weight feels like I don't quite fit in. But I know what I am. Its frustrating because I know know know that I am not going to be happy with my body for a long time. Like it'll be over a year before I can get to my goal weight. And it sucks that I let Binge eating for so long get me here.
I got frustrated with my lack of progress and took laxatives for the first time yesterday and my number finally went down. I've been restricting to 900 cal/day but it doesn't seem to be going fast enough. So I'm going to 700/day now.
I just started school which is like a major trigger for my depression. Also just started a job which is as well. The job is at a food place, and the food is one of the foods that is a b/p trigger for me. Ugh.
I just feel so out of place everywhere. I want to go off my bipolar meds because they can cause weight gain and I'm afraid they're holding me back from losing weight. Idk. I'm just so confused right now.
[Intro] I switched accounts but never did an intro, so here we go.
/u/Im_A_Whale_AMA [5'3.5" | bloated whale, will update | GW: 100 | UGW: 80 lbs | F]
Created: Wed Aug 24 09:13:41 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zd28w/i_switched_accounts_but_never_did_an_intro_so/
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Well, I just switched accounts because I'm pretty sure my brother will eventually find out about my posting to this subreddit (he knows my reddit handle, as do people from my other online groups), and I never really did an official intro on my other account, so I'll do one here!
I'm most likely the youngest person in my subreddit, though I'm not going to say my exact age.
I'm at a low-healthy BMI right now (will update flair once I find a scale), but I've wildly fluctuated between 100-120 lbs as my eating habits go crazy.
I have a lot of food issues right now. If I eat something, I binge. If I fast till the end of the day, I binge. If I binge, I binge. Trying to find a healthy middle atm.
I'm a soccer player and a triathlete, so I'm usually pretty active.
Anyways, I hope you all have a nice day <3
[Help] I've just recently moved out to live with my boyfriend..
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Aug 24 09:12:28 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zd20h/ive_just_recently_moved_out_to_live_with_my/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] Why is my whole life starve or binge?
/u/PBhatesme [5'4"| 144 | 24.7 | -52| F]
Created: Wed Aug 24 08:59:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zczps/why_is_my_whole_life_starve_or_binge/
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I've spent the morning pacing around my house trying to talk myself out of going to buy and eat a dozen donuts.
Essentially, I'll either fast or binge. Why can't I just be a normal person who goes and gets one donut?
Nope it's no donuts or all the donuts. I have no in-between :(
[Help] Help with calories in airpopped popcorn
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Aug 24 08:23:33 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zcta6/help_with_calories_in_airpopped_popcorn/
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[deleted]
[Help] Tmi questions about bulimia + mini meltdown..
/u/Itsemurha [177cm | 71.9kg| 22.43| -47kg | GW: 60kg | F]
Created: Wed Aug 24 08:16:59 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zcs57/tmi_questions_about_bulimia_mini_meltdown/
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Do you always stop when you get to hitting bile? I keep drinking water and trying to purge more after that because I'm so scared there's still food in my stomach. Does bile really mean there is nothing left? I've heard of "flushing" where people drink water and purge until they are only throwing up water.. or is what I am doing considered "flushing" too?
Also, have you been classified with your bulimia/ED? How much purging during a week is considered "severe" to you? I recently asked for my medical history logs and apparently I have been classified as moderate/severe which I am having a super hard time believing. I guess, yeah, this entire month, 17/24 days I have thrown up but to be classified as severe I keep reading that some people will binge and purge up to 20 times in a day which I can't even imagine doing.. :(
Also last question but have any of you had irreversible damage done to your body through bulimia? My heart rate is also usually low and sits at about 45bpm. I'm pretty sure I'm gonna have a heart attack soon and I keep switching between wanting desperately to get better and desperately wanting to drop dead..
[Tip] Trying to prevent/stop a binge?
/u/babyespresso [5'6'' | 97 lbs | 15.87 | F]
Created: Wed Aug 24 07:13:59 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zci5r/trying_to_preventstop_a_binge/
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Start a new fast in one of those fasting apps (like Fasting Secret)! This really helps me - it gives you this feeling of a ~fresh start~ and a weird sense of accomplishment haha.
I sometimes make meals for the whole day in the morning and I tend to snack a lot while preparing them (3 olives, a piece of cucumber, you get the idea). It used to really throw me off and sometimes I'd just give up and eat everything (I used to have this weird thing going on where I always had to finish a meal, otherwise I wouldn't stop thinking about it), but it hasn't happened to me since I started logging my fasts! :) Thought some of you might find this helpful if you're struggling with something similar.
[Tip] 10 Simple Food Swaps to Save Calories
/u/30sumfinproA
Created: Wed Aug 24 06:52:18 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zcerl/10_simple_food_swaps_to_save_calories/
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http://blog.myfitnesspal.com/10-simple-food-swaps-save-calories/?user_id=194774250123053&alt_source=mfp&alt_medium=email&alt_campaign=weekly20160822&utm_source=mfp&utm_medium=email&utm_campaign=weekly20160822&mkt_tok=eyJpIjoiTkdReVpqSTJaRFkzTmpnMCIsInQiOiJPa0ExYm56RlZ4N2xrbzFVRksyU0NKZVkrQlVjc3JGeUxtTk9UZUlTY3BvU25lSWplSmNLNVd3TTJtOGRvQTludXJaZUpCN0l6N3RqYlJqcU5hZlJiOVdhajY1OFhkOGM2VHc2UFRRcjdnOD0ifQ%3D%3D
[Other] Pro Ana Weight Loss App - Update!
/u/petiteautumn [5'7" | 150 | 23.5 | -60.8 | Female]
Created: Wed Aug 24 06:52:03 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zceqd/pro_ana_weight_loss_app_update/
---
So, as per /u/temporaryaccount_101's suggestion, I made a [rose logo](http://imgur.com/a/dExK4). Comment which one you like more, and since I'm not the best artist if anyone wants to try their hand at making one, I'd really appreciate it!
I'm going to see if I can make it for android as well, which will probably be harder as I only have an iPhone. If the app gets rejected from the App Store, there's always Apptism. It allows you to download apps without the App Store. For Android, I wouldn't put it on Google Play, but instead have it as an apk file you could download.
And here are the specifications of the app:
Optional Passcode.
Meanspo/Thinspo/Bonespo/Fitspo/Reverse Thinspo galleries.
Reminders.
Tips/Tricks/Rules lists.
Weight Loss Projector.
Goal Checklists (For rewards and such).
Various Diets.
Motivational Quotes.
Days since I purged/binged/etc Tracker.
At first glance, it would pretty much look like any weight loss app (except without minimum weight requirements), and you could turn on the pro-ana stuff in settings.
If anyone has any ideas about anything, don't hesitate to share them!
[Discussion] Way To Go Wednesday August 24, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Wed Aug 24 06:03:12 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zc7qf/way_to_go_wednesday_august_24_2016/
---
This is the weekly achievement thread for August 24, 2016.
This weekly thread is to spotlight those achievements you feel don't necessarily warrant their own post, but you'd like to celebrate all the same. This is not limited to specifically ED-related goals; share anything you are happy about having done or accomplished recently!
^Achievement ^threads ^are ^posted ^every ^Wednesday.
^Have ^any ^questions ^or ^concerns? ^Comment ^below, ^or [^PM ^the ^mods.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FproED)
[Help] Panicking due to appearance changes, but the measurements don't make sense?
/u/superherothemesong
Created: Wed Aug 24 04:44:31 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zby1h/panicking_due_to_appearance_changes_but_the/
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(How do you flair a post on mobile??)
I was hoping to get some wisdom from you guys, because I'm freaking out and confusing myself.
My psychiatrist/counselor insisted that I start increasing my calories, and since I was having heart problems again I did. It's been a couple weeks now and I put on 4.6 lbs, but then my body seemed to rebalance itself a bit and I dropped back down so I had only gained 0.4 lbs. On top of that, my measurements say I've lost an inch in my waist and 0.25 inches in my hips since last month. I wasn't sure what was going on, but I wasn't complaining.
Then, though, I took progress pics today, for comparison purposes. And it was terrible. I look so incredibly bloated and soft and fat in comparison to a couple weeks ago. Like the difference is obvious. And now I'm beginning to notice in other pictures that I think my double chin (from when I was much heavier) is coming back and everything, and I am freaking out.
What is going on? Is this even possible? Am I losing my mind? What do I do to fix this - FAST?
Edit: I figured out how to flair things. Not sure what to call this though.
[Discussion] If you had to say - What weight range do you think OTHER people of your height should fall into?
/u/smokesanddietcokes [<3 ]
Created: Wed Aug 24 04:41:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zbxr6/if_you_had_to_say_what_weight_range_do_you_think/
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Just curious.
I am 5ft (female, gender matters too I guess!). I want to be 88lbs atm. I realised that if I were to say what weight OTHER adult women my height should ideally be for health and aesthetics (although generally don't think it's my business anyway, only consider it when I purposely question myself on it) it would be a range between 100-120lbs, maybe down to mid 90's at the lowest if they had very little muscle for whatever reason. Higher if they had a LOT of muscle.. like, 130lbs, maybe even up to 140lbs possibly with a sheer *butt*load of muscle.
All those numbers are higher than my 88lbs goal for myself. But even realising this, it doesn't stop me wanting to be 88lbs, thinking I should be 88lbs with my current muscle mass. That I am much too fat for aesthetics or even health tbh at higher than that. My max would be 95lbs, with way more muscle than I have now - like, three more years worth lol.
How about you? Any thoughts like this?
[Other] I've gained back some weight when I quit counting my calories, so I decided to get a handle on that. My day is already off to a great start, for once a breakfast that wasn't 300 cals and I can start the day guilt free. <3
/u/TiredOfBeingFat_
Created: Wed Aug 24 03:44:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zbrem/ive_gained_back_some_weight_when_i_quit_counting/
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http://imgur.com/vOvLLQy
[Rant/Rave] I just ate 4 hot dogs and I hate myself
/u/chimichanga_mischief [5"4 | 142 | 24.4 | -24 | F]
Created: Wed Aug 24 02:20:45 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zbipu/i_just_ate_4_hot_dogs_and_i_hate_myself/
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That is all.
[Tip] Tips for a long fast?
/u/Afrikanwilddog
Created: Wed Aug 24 00:31:04 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zb6ui/tips_for_a_long_fast/
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Hey guys, so i fucked up big time these past two days, and completely pigged out. We had some family get togethers and i easily ate over 4,000 calories both days. And i was surrounded my family for celabratory reasons so i couldnt throw up, someone would have noticed, and it didnt feel right under the conditions. But now I despise myself, especially since school starts next week. I want to go on a 5 day fast, i need to. The longest ive ever gone is 2 days and that was pretty miserable. For those of you have gone 3 or more days, how tf did you do it? And what helped to make it as easy and smooth as possible?
Any pro ED Skype groups or buddies?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Aug 23 22:54:29 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zave0/any_pro_ed_skype_groups_or_buddies/
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[removed]
[Rant/Rave] My BFFs house burned down today
/u/PBhatesme [5'4"| 144 | 24.7 | -52| F]
Created: Tue Aug 23 20:45:48 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zad1i/my_bffs_house_burned_down_today/
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She lost everything she's ever owned. And two pets.
She, her husband and their 2 1/2 year old son got out, but I've been a mess today.
I've been on heavy restriction/ fasting for weeks now. After I heard I ate 12 slices of cheese and I can't even guess how many ounces of vodka. Truthfully, I'm probably still under maintenance (as I've been doing 2+ hours on the treadmill lately) but I still feel like shit.
Not to mention someone set up a gofundme page for her and I don't even have an extra $10 to give her. I did offer to help her clean or pack or move or baby sit. But I still feel like a loser.
TLDR: Not really about ED. I just suck.
[Rant/Rave] Bittersweet moment...
/u/salamanderqueen [5'9"| CW: 159.4 | SW: 180 | GW: 120 | -20.6 | 19F]
Created: Tue Aug 23 20:44:37 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zactz/bittersweet_moment/
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Finally weighed in under 160 today, which means I lost all the weight I gained since I started school. Took me a little over two months. Was really happy for about ten minutes before I looked in the mirror and realized I still look exactly the same at 159 as I did at 180. And I realized that I probably won't look as skinny as I want at my goal weight of 130 (which is a healthy weight for my height). So I'm dropping my UGW down to 120, which is classified as underweight.
So I guess this rant has an actual point, which is, when did you guys start seeing actual progress? Especially people who started at a higher weight like me, is it normal to still look exactly the same 20 pounds down?
[Discussion] Would anyone be interested in a Pro Ana weight loss app?
/u/petiteautumn [5'7" | 150 | 23.5 | -60.8 | Female]
Created: Tue Aug 23 20:43:17 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zaclj/would_anyone_be_interested_in_a_pro_ana_weight/
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I was thinking about creating a weight loss app, geared to specifically those who are pro ana. It would have everything a normal weight loss calculator has, but without all the warnings, and it would have tips, meanspo, thinspo, etc. It would also have a weight projector like losertown or whatweightwhen.
I've already started on the markup, but before I actually start making it, I would like to know if there's a demand.
Also, any comments/concerns/critiques/suggestions are very welcome! Any ideas for names/logos are also helpful!
[Rant/Rave] I know I'm not unique in this feeling, but I'm so afraid of gaining weight and I just want to vent.
/u/kpatable [5'9" | 125.1 | 18.1/18.5 | -21.9 | F]
Created: Tue Aug 23 20:36:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zabl9/i_know_im_not_unique_in_this_feeling_but_im_so/
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Every fucking statistic I hear about how it's so hard to maintain weight loss and how more and more people are going to be overweight or obese in the US (where I live) in a certain number of years makes me feel so scared that I will fall into that statistic. What makes me so special? I don't know if I'm going to gain weight on my new eating plan, and I feel so awful and afraid every time I eat over my planned amount of calories. I just want to go a week without overeating or binging. I want to be able to control this. But everything I'm reading about hunger hormones and the food environment and shit like that is making me feel hopeless. I had 1540 calories today. I'm so afraid I'll get triggered and eat more even though I feel very satiated. I don't fucking know. Ugh.
[Intro] Losing weight quickly after a long break from my ED
/u/throwawaynm88 [Height 5'3.5"| CW 114.6 lbs| BMI 20| SW 125 lbs| GW 100 lbs]
Created: Tue Aug 23 20:36:02 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4zabfs/losing_weight_quickly_after_a_long_break_from_my/
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Hey, so, I struggled with my ED as a teen all the way up until 2012. Then, I stopped because I was pregnant and realized I could be harming my baby. Now I've "relapsed" but I feel really in control and stable for some reason. I've been drinking protein shakes for breakfast, lunch, and a snack, and eating a raw veggie dinner.. lots of water in the AM but none past 3 PM..
I've gone from 125 lbs now to 118 today in the last week.. I just don't know why, but I feel great, despite weakness, dizziness, etc. I feel like I have some sort of power in my life, amongst all the confusion and things I can't control that have been happening..
so.. I've lurked here for a couple weeks, but I wanted to join and say hi. I hope I'm not breaking any rules here, I just wanted to know if anyone else feels this way when restricting??
[Other] Officially Switching Accounts!!
/u/boredzoi [5'10| 135 | 19.35 | -15lbs | F]
Created: Tue Aug 23 20:16:30 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4za89x/officially_switching_accounts/
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Hey cuties!! This is just a heads up that I'll no longer be using /u/boredzoi anymore! Its because I've been getting pretty paranoid over being found by someone who knows me and having to explain.... :0
((Maybe using my tumblr username wasn't the smartest idea... oops))
I haven't found a new name to use yet, but I'll comment back and let y'all know it's me!! ♡♡♡♡
Love y'all, be back soon!!
[Rant/Rave] My dad just pointed out my stomach fat in front of a ton of people. [Rant]
/u/sossox
Created: Tue Aug 23 19:06:16 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z9wov/my_dad_just_pointed_out_my_stomach_fat_in_front/
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We're talking with family and he grabbed my stomach and made a comment about how I was "eating too much ice cream". It really hit me hard because I've been trying really hard to lose weight and it's not coming off fast enough. He doesn't know I have an ED so I see where he'd expect me to take it as a joke but I feel fucking disgusting today after breaking my calorie limit so yeah.
(can't flair on mobile)
[Tip] vitamin tabs for water!
/u/hayleystark [5'4"|NB]
Created: Tue Aug 23 17:30:16 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z9gvq/vitamin_tabs_for_water/
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http://imgur.com/a/W7IrL
[Rant/Rave] Please, someone tell the PMS monster with pneumonia that she does not need Taco Bell...
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Aug 23 16:17:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z94gz/please_someone_tell_the_pms_monster_with/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] I don't want to get any skinnier anymore
/u/Sonnenblumenschein [5'3.5" | 91.5 lbs | 16.0 | -63.5 lbs]
Created: Tue Aug 23 14:58:37 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z8qha/i_dont_want_to_get_any_skinnier_anymore/
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My bmi finally dipped below the 16 and honestly I'm so embarrassed, I don't want this, I'm killing myself, if I continue like this everything I've worked for will be destroyed, I'll have to gain and I've permanently damaged myself, on top of this all the bones that come sticking out start to disgust me, even the muscle definition just grosses me out, I don't fucking want this anymore.
Well just eat more someone would say, it's not that hard.
Just that it fucking is, my brain just refuses, I'm mentally not fucking capable of eating enough. Tomorrow I'll eat 650 kcal, today I ate about my tdee and I feel so disgusting, I *need need need* to make up for that, otherwise I'm a morbidly obese death fat. 😭🔫 Kill me
[Rant/Rave] Feeling like a failure~
/u/DivingRightIn [72in | don't ask | don't tell | ~57.2lbs | UGW: 115lbs | F]
Created: Tue Aug 23 14:28:07 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z8kyc/feeling_like_a_failure/
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I decided to give intuitive eating a try my last 2 weeks before school because there was just too much going on and I could not deal with everything. I guess I ate too much because Im back at 150 AGAIN. 150.2 to be exact. I promised myself I'd never ever EVER go over 150 again, and yet here I am. 8.0 lbs heavier than my lowest weight and all gained back in less than a month.
I'm doing better in terms of laxative use. I haven't used them since I took way too many a couple weeks ago. Having natural BMs like a normal person (TMI sorry). But that doesn't make me feel better, just more like a failure.
I'm just laying in bed crying. I wish restricting for a week would put me back at my LW so I could just continue where I left off but I done fucked up and now I have to fix it and Im just further away from my UGW than ever.
[Goal] It's finally over.
/u/ForeverEmptyInside [5'9"| CW:133 lbs | BMI 19.6 | LW:104lbs | M]
Created: Tue Aug 23 14:27:47 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z8kws/its_finally_over/
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Today is the day I have reached a goal.
It's not a weight loss goal. It's not a calorie restriction goal. It's not a fasting goal.
I have finally escaped therapy.
A couple months back, when I was near my lowest weight, I thought I could tell my therapist about the voice in my head telling me that "I wasn't worth the food". She spent many weeks working with me through psychotherapy, but to no avail. My weight was still dropping dramatically. When I reached my lowest weight, she gave me an ultimatum. I could either go to hospital to get myself checked out, or they would call an ambulance. She said if I tried to run, she would call the police and they would force me into hospital. After two painful weeks on a psych ward, I was discharged and put into outpatient therapy. Ever since therapists, doctors and my parents have been monitoring my weight/ food intake.
I long for the days where no one knew about my illness. I long for the days where I could fast for days and no one gave a damn. The voice of ana in my head truly regrets ever letting anyone know about it's existence.
That's when I decided I am going to get those times of secrecy back. On September 3rd, I am moving far far away for university. Far away from anyone I have ever known, or loved.
I have been working for this, for a very long time. It took a lot of carefully planned lies and deceit. The entire month of August I have been skipping meals and purging. I have been rigging the scales at the doctors office with weights. I am a horrible human being.
Today was my last "weigh in". From here on out, no one will be monitoring me. I move away in less than two weeks. I will not be continuing therapy when I am there, despite what my current therapist wants.
This time, No one can stop me on my long descent into starvation.
[Other] [other] Today's lunch <3
/u/weightliftingwaif [5'2.5" | 111.8lbs | 20.76| 2lbs]
Created: Tue Aug 23 14:05:18 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z8gug/other_todays_lunch_3/
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http://imgur.com/DRMwNUs
[Rant/Rave] This just happened
/u/Skinniminnie [5'3" | 157.0 lbs | 27.6 BMI | -12 lbs | F]
Created: Tue Aug 23 14:00:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z8fy2/this_just_happened/
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On mobile can't flair :(
I was feeling good about not eating like a pig this week so far (three days, as if thats a lot) but the only downside is I can't get rid of this stupid sweet tooth!
Had my lunch, maybe 300 calories max (veggies, salmon, rice, egg all mixed together into about a 1/2 cup portion total) and feeling proud that I felt full but not overfull and after I smoke a cigarette (also helps my appetite) I walk by someone holding a Starbucks frappucino so my twisted mind goes "oh i need one of those!"
The entire walk there I kept telling myself to turn around, just go back to my classroom, I'll regret it as soon as I finish it, etc. My dumbass keeps walking goes in and when I get into line I start having second thoughts but actual maybe I should leave thoughts l. Unfortunately my social anxiety took over at that point and didn't want to feel like a fool for waiting in line that long just to leave while everyone stares at me so I bargained with myself and got a tall mocha frap.
Lo and behold, I feel like a fat lump of poop and wish I could purge. A bit of a rant but so upset right now because I knew it was a bad decision before I even stepped foot in Starbucks!
[Help] What is the best easy way to learn my TDEE?
/u/kpatable [5'9" | 125.1 | 18.1/18.5 | -21.9 | F]
Created: Tue Aug 23 13:56:37 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z8f8a/what_is_the_best_easy_way_to_learn_my_tdee/
---
I'm so paranoid that I'm eating too much. How do you accurately calculate your tdee? I know there are calculators online, but the issue is that, since I'm a trans girl, I don't know whether I have a male or female metabolism. Because hrt doesn't always change your metabolism.
So what I did is I [used](http://www.losertown.org/eats/cal_act.php) [5](https://tdeecalculator.net/result.php?s=imperial&age=24&g=male&lbs=127&in=69&act=1.2&bf=&f=1) [different](http://mytdee.com/#gender=male&yr=24&cm=175.3&kg=57.6&bfp=&goal=maintain&formula=standard&units=imperial&exercise=sedentary) [online](http://www.health-calc.com/diet/energy-expenditure-advanced) [calculators](http://www.sailrabbit.com/bmr/) and averaged the male and female results. I also did recorded separate results for light exercise and sedentary options, because I don't know which one to pick. Basically the results ran from 1600 - 2000, with the total average being 1800. Can I trust this? Or is there a better way to calculate it? I just have been eating when I'm hungry (because I'm trying to recover), but sometimes I'm so hungry that I eat up to 3000 calories a day. But then I'll go some days only eating 1500. So Idek what is happening. I guess this isn't the best sub to ask, but how much should I eat, and how do I *know* how much I should eat? Should I just eat when I'm hungry and stop when I'm full? Or should I make sure I get a certain amount of calories every day and eat at scheduled times? I don't know :c Recovery is hard.
[Goal] Last night was the first night in months I got drunk and didn't binge!
/u/I_Love_Spiders_AMA [5' 7" | CW 125 | GW 120 | BMI 20ish | -25 | F]
Created: Tue Aug 23 13:55:53 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z8f48/last_night_was_the_first_night_in_months_i_got/
---
It feels so good, like I've finally proved to myself that I CAN control this. I rarely ever have problems with binging outside of drinking, but for some reason I get so horribly hungry when drunk and that paired with the lapse in control have lead to many bad nights.
I just wanted to share because there's nobody aside from my therapist that understands the tremendous weight something like this holds over you day after day (and the fact that only my two closest friends know). Any progress is good progress and I think I finally had a break through last night. And I couldn't have done it without this community, so thank you all for being so supportive and awesome.
[Intro] What are some of your rules? (also intro)
/u/ppyeoreul-mudgosipeo [5'6 | 165 | 26.6 | -15 | F | GW 112]
Created: Tue Aug 23 13:46:44 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z8ddh/what_are_some_of_your_rules_also_intro/
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I hope this is allowed. :x I've always been very curious about the differences in the way these disorders manifest between different people, so I was wondering what some of you guys' rules are. I haven't posted here very much but I lurk a lot. I like y'all. I feel like so much less of a freak here. (25 now, disordered since 11, wildly fluctuating weights, never officially diagnosed/treated, blah blah)
I'll get the ball rolling with some of mine:
- one kind of grain/starch at a time (I don't see how people can eat garlic bread with pasta dishes)
- absolutely no visible "pieces" of fat on cuts of meat
- food can't touch on the plate (I know I'm not alone there)
- I usually eat with chopsticks and a long-handled spoon and "build-a-bite" on the spoon with the chopsticks, if I'm eating a meal that includes different components and not something like a soup or stew that you eat from a bowl (outside my house, I do the same with a knife and fork-- I was the only person at last year's thanksgiving to actually use a freaking knife and fork like a civilized person)
- I like everything to be in pretty small pieces if possible
- I cannot *stand* for grease or crumbs to be on my hands, which is why I usually eat with utensils. But if I'm eating (baked) wings or something that you pretty much have to eat with your hands, I'll hold it with a paper towel to avoid getting my hands dirty
- because I "build" my bites, I hardly ever eat only one item at a time, and I have to time/plan my plate so that I finish at least two things at once. If I finish one thing before the other, too bad. I don't get to eat the rest of it.
[Rant/Rave] I'm fucking pathetic.
/u/sossox
Created: Tue Aug 23 13:38:42 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z8byt/im_fucking_pathetic/
---
Rant. So I've been trying to stop purging after reading into how bad it is and instead starting to restrict. It's about 4pm and I was doing good with my 700 cal goal less than halfway there. Currently bingeing on Doritos and chicken strips I hate myself I have no self control.
(can't flair I'm on mobile)
[Rant/Rave] Afraid of developing BDD (rant)
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Aug 23 13:06:34 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z864b/afraid_of_developing_bdd_rant/
---
[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] Rant about my thigh gap goals.
/u/jeannieisdead
Created: Tue Aug 23 13:04:42 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z85r7/rant_about_my_thigh_gap_goals/
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Hello everyone! 5'2 108 lbs and loving the feeling of my hip bones pressing up against my mattress at night. But my damn thighs are always the last to go! There was a time last year where I wasn't stressed and i slept in late so I only ate once a day and that was purged almost immediately. My gap was apparent then.
I typically teeter between 104 and 114. I'm not happy with my weight lately even though my pants feel more loose. But it's my thighs man! They jiggle and make the floor shake. My mom calls me thunder thighs. I kind of want to take cheese wire to them and just... slim them down.
[Rant/Rave] Posting mid binge
/u/FaithHopeTrick [5'7 | CW 123 GW 119 |19.20 | -32lbs | F]
Created: Tue Aug 23 12:45:35 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z8260/posting_mid_binge/
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Kept at 500 calories then dinner has brought me to 1200 calories and I've got the hunger. I know I'm gonna have more. I feel like a piece of SHIT. I wish I could stop myself. That's basically why I'm posting. I don't deserve to be thin if I behave like this. I'm so close to being under 9 stone which while not UGW is a big goal for me. I'm 1 lbs away and I could have hit it tomorrow and now I've RUINED it and I want to fucking hit myself in the face
Sorry for rant. On mobile
[Rant/Rave] Doctor doesn't want me to weigh less than 115 pounds
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Aug 23 12:42:48 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z81np/doctor_doesnt_want_me_to_weigh_less_than_115/
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I was 124 about three months ago there, and now I'm 119 (with clothes). She said the absolute lowest I should be is 115. At my height (apparently 5'3 & 3/4 inch, not 5'4 ): I can be 105 pounds and still have a healthy BMI. She made my mom worry even more about me. Great. But this is probably my last checkup since I'm about 17 & 1/2. Then I can take myself to the doctor and have confidentiality and not have to worry about my mom thinking I want to go in alone because I have an STD or something. :/
Next time I'm drinking a ton of water. What do your doctors think about your weight?
[Rant/Rave] Binge wasn't as bad as I thought [rave]
/u/disbeetch [5'4'' | 144 | 24.72 | -24 | F]
Created: Tue Aug 23 12:40:53 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z81am/binge_wasnt_as_bad_as_i_thought_rave/
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Sorry for the fake flair, on mobile. Anyways, AS USUAL (ugh) I binged super hard Saturday and Sunday after restricting so hard all week, shoutout to my hangovers!! Calorie wise, the weekend was a total nightmare, and yesterday morning I was up 5 (!!!!!!!!!!) pounds. Weighed myself today after another good restricting day, and I'm .2 pounds lighter than I was on Friday! Gotta get control of the weekend binges but at least this one didn't totally derail my progress.
[Goal] Mixed feelings about hitting my goal and how far I've come
/u/woollyshirt [172cm | 54.7kg | 18.33 | -33.3kg | NB/M]
Created: Tue Aug 23 12:38:01 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z80s0/mixed_feelings_about_hitting_my_goal_and_how_far/
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15th January 2016, I was 194lbs/88kg. 23rd August 2016, I'm 121.3lbs/55kg.
I had been deliberately overeating for a while to spite my disordered, abusive mother who raised me with no knowledge of nutrition and told me I was destined to be fat. I was >200lbs when I was 13, and hovered around 170-180 for most of my teens. Seeing my weight go up on the scale felt inevitable but it also felt like I was punishing my mother somehow for not being like her and not eating. When my BMI finally shifted from 2x.x to 3x.x I realised how unhealthy and disgusting and unhappy I was and started restricting. I only had dinner with family, skipping breakfast and lunch, and stopped eating dessert and drinking juice. I began to calorie count on mfp again as best as I could while still eating food I hadn't prepared. Eventually I got a food scale, started preparing my own meals, and got a very physical part time job two days a week on top of college. Restricting makes me feel GOOD. Seeing the scale drop makes me smile. Noticing new bones and feeling less jiggly when I walk makes me feel in control and powerful. I'm in control of my own destiny - way more so than dealing with the consequences of overeating. It's a nice 'fuck you' to have another biscuit but it's an even bigger 'fuck you' to be skinny.
I set 55kg as a goal a long time ago for a 19ish BMI- low, but healthy. What I didn't account for was that I haven't finished puberty and I'm tall enough now for this to make me underweight according to the new BMI scale. I definitely do not feel it. I have very little muscle tone, and feel ashamed by my stomach and thighs still. I would absolutely love to keep losing, but I have a separate medical issue which I need to be physically and mentally stable to be treated for. It may be possible to deduce what I'm talking about but I think if you are able to do that you'll understand how important this treatment is, and how even though I feel wide and jiggly, I want to give maintenance a go. I have about a year, and then I can lose more. Given how quickly I have lost this weight (33kg/72.8lbs lost) I don't feel like it'll be hard to get to a weight I'm comfortable at. I plan to try and focus on building upper body muscle now to balance out my crazy cyclist legs and give my disordered brain a distraction from the scale.
I feel like maintenance is going to be tough. Eating has to feel justified to me, and not just 'because my body has to function!' but because I feel weak and shaky, or it's a hot day and I'm walking a lot, or I'm going on a bike ride and I'm going to look silly if I'm cycling at 8mph because I haven't eaten all day but I'll just look really unfit. I don't really know how to stick to my macros and also get past that. Food makes me feel so guilty, regardless of if it's cottage cheese or a chocolate bar. I feel like everyone is judging me eating and that if they see me having something calorific then I'll look gluttonous and disgusting instead of small and graceful. I lie to my parents about going out for pizza and chips and then feel disgusted with myself for letting them believe that I'd do that. It's so exhausting.
I hated being fat but I hate feeling both in control and horrifically out of control now. I don't think I can do this alone but I don't know if the therapy I'm starting will support me in the way I want, and I'm also kind of scared that I'll lose my desire to be tiny and bony and end up back where I started. I just want to get through the next year. This is such an important reason for me to maintain and if I don't maintain now, I'll just have longer to wait before I can start losing again, so I should really do what I can to help myself now, as horrible and conflicting as it feels.
Now, the bit you might actually care about:
[Progress side by side pic](https://imgur.com/zwIpLcl)
[Weight graphs for this year](https://imgur.com/a/alq2U) (got a new phone in march explaining libra lacking entries a bit at the start)
I might take that progress picture down for privacy reasons but also because I feel kind of disgusted seeing myself like that. I never want to be that again.
[Rant/Rave] Water weight >.>
/u/anotherbigone [5'6" | HW 182 | LW 112 | CW 164]
Created: Tue Aug 23 12:09:27 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z7vf3/water_weight/
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I've been eating at least 1000 cals under my TDEE for weeks now but after dropping five pounds quickly after a binge drinking session I bounced up a pound and a half and so far only a pound has come off.
So for the past three days I've not only not lost any apparent weight but have gained a half a pound. I know logically this is food or water weight but it is driving. Me. Nuts.
[Help] Custom waist belts?
/u/Alexa1p [5'5'' | 110 | 18 | -10.7 | F]
Created: Tue Aug 23 12:07:15 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z7v1q/custom_waist_belts/
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Hey, I have a tiny waist (large hips tho), and I can't find any waist belts that fit me. But I love waist belts. My waist is about 25 inches, though, so I think I'm going to have to custom order some online. Do any of you have suggestions?
[Rant/Rave] Motivation
/u/Alexa1p [5'5'' | 110 | 18 | -10.7 | F]
Created: Tue Aug 23 11:53:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z7scv/motivation/
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I'm poly, and my boyfriend just left for San Francisco to attend a programming meetup, and then go to a concert with his ex-girlfriend. I don't like her. I'm fine with him going, we talked about it extensively.. I'm doing my best to distract myself with coding while he's gone.
I feel a little guilty, because my boyfriend worries about me restricting, but this is honestly a perfect opportunity to stop eating. Any time I think about food, I imagine him with his ex, and it makes me want to be thinner. At the same time, that seems fucked up to me. She's chubby by my standards, I guess my bf doesn't mind, though. Still, the voice, "If you stop eating you'll be more attractive" won't shut the fuck up, though honestly I'm grateful for the motivation.
I feel like a failure
/u/preppy123
Created: Tue Aug 23 11:29:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z7nwz/i_feel_like_a_failure/
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[removed]
[Rant/Rave] Sometimes it feels like an eating disorder is all you have
/u/itsgettingexhausting [5'4"| CW103.6| 17.78| -6.8lbs| Female]
Created: Tue Aug 23 11:16:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z7lev/sometimes_it_feels_like_an_eating_disorder_is_all/
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I feel as though I cannot trust anyone. People are fickle and situations are to unstable. At least I can control what I eat. At least I can lose weight.
[Rant/Rave] My parents accused me of doing drugs and kicked me out.
/u/dec4y [5'3|cw:148|25.4|-16lbs|F]
Created: Tue Aug 23 11:04:04 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z7iwy/my_parents_accused_me_of_doing_drugs_and_kicked/
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(Sorry in advance for the rant)
As the title says. My parents (my dad and stepmom) think that because I've "lost so much weight" (I haven't even lost that much), and because I'm irritable and am in my room a lot, I'm doing hard drugs. The only reason I'm irritable and stay in my room is that every time I leave I get yelled at and accused of doing things I'm not doing, and if I try leave the house to do anything besides work I get in trouble.
They're mad at me for being dishonest but they don't give me any room to be honest with them. We can't even talk because I'm working or busy or trying to sleep because I never sleep anymore, and I'm SUPER stressed out because I'm graduating in like 6 months and now I don't even have a place to live.
I'm staying with my sister right now but school starts tomorrow and I honestly just don't know what to do. I can't restrict here because my sister bakes all the time and wants me to taste things for her, and she cooks dinner and makes me eat in front of her, she gets mad if i don't eat and she knows I have a history of ED. She doesn't even own a scale.
Everything is falling apart around me and I'm trying to be okay but it's just so hard.
[Help] my parents are watching me like a hawk
/u/kennedyconnolly [5'9| 124 | 17.9]
Created: Tue Aug 23 10:56:27 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z7hfe/my_parents_are_watching_me_like_a_hawk/
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they know i have an ED. my dad makes my breakfast for me before i get up. my lunch before i get home from practice. dinner he watches me serve myself. force feeds me dessert. every time i try to throw out food or dump lemonade or milk he somehow knows and then yells at me. i dont need this many calories. they say that because i run everyday i need 3,000 calories like i dont think thats how that works. theyre threatening to take away running from me if i have lost weight by the end of the summer which i am pretty sure i have. they threw out all our scales. i just hate them so much. i dont know what to do. im so fat i dont even need to gain weight.
[Rant/Rave] Starbucks 😭
/u/GoalsandGossip [5'10" | CW 181.4 | BMI 26 | GW 175 | UGW 125 | F |]
Created: Tue Aug 23 10:54:39 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z7h29/starbucks/
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I have a free drink reward. I normally get a latte or frap with it but that's legit all my calories for the day. I have to decide whether to save it or use it on a black coffee. Wahhh.
(On mobile, cannot flair. I suppose this is a rant)
[Discussion] Daily Food Diary! August 23, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Tue Aug 23 10:02:20 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z779p/daily_food_diary_august_23_2016/
---
This is a daily food diary thread for August 23, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
[Help] What foods help beat bloating and water retention?
/u/smokesanddietcokes [<3 ]
Created: Tue Aug 23 09:14:34 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z6ydu/what_foods_help_beat_bloating_and_water_retention/
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I'm going to be stocking up on some foods soon to try and look spiffy for my break away with SO :) To eat for a few days leading up to the break! I'm thinking 3 days of solely bloat/water 'banishing' type foods.
I don't want to water fast completely leading up to it because I'll need energy for the trip there, and I want to look at least a little not-tired with no eye bags! Also I'm *hoping* that eating the days leading up to it will lessen the risk of bloating like crazy when I get there and food hits my stomach? Cus we will be eating out first day of the trip with friends..
So far I have on the to-do list:
- Drink lots of water
- Keep carbs low
- No high fibre veg (noooo mah broccoliiii *cry*)
- Are greens like lettuce at least still okay? Maybe spinach? CAN I HAVE MUSHROOMS?
- High protein, but no dairy for me cus that causes bloat (I have eggs and tuna on the list.. anything else? I don't eat any meat besides tuna though!)
- Pineapple and watermelon are supposed to be good for digestion and water..? Is this true? Should I have a portion a day? Worried about the cals but the benefits might outweight the cons.. I'll be overeating that week anyway due to the trip itself so maybe a few extra fruit cals shouldn't be much of a worry.
Anything else to achieve as flat a tummy as possible, and look a little leaner at least my first day on my trip before we eat a bunch of grease?! :P
- Also thinking of getting some [Aloe colon cleanse tablets](http://www.hollandandbarrett.com/shop/product/aloe-pura-gentle-action-aloe-vera-colon-cleanse-tablets-60020753) and taking one a night for the three days.. any experience with colon cleanse things? How long did they take to have an effect?
[Tip] 10 Disturbing Facts About Fast Food - This completely turned me off fast food, it's DISGUSTING.
/u/petiteautumn [5'7" | 150 | 23.5 | -60.8 | Female]
Created: Tue Aug 23 08:23:49 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z6p7f/10_disturbing_facts_about_fast_food_this/
---
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GANZGjtMzKo,
[Thinspo] Thought you guys would appreciate this as much as I did
/u/bougainvilleas [5'5.5" | 101 | 16.6 | -11 | F]
Created: Tue Aug 23 08:21:26 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z6otr/thought_you_guys_would_appreciate_this_as_much_as/
---
http://imgur.com/a/P2tiM
[Rant/Rave] I didn't realise how badly I was affected by my ADHD
/u/KatnipAndTuck [5'2 | 156 | - 5 | F]
Created: Tue Aug 23 08:18:04 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z6o99/i_didnt_realise_how_badly_i_was_affected_by_my/
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I just had a quick break down of happy tears and I needed to come here to tell you guys about it.
I have had ADHD for my entire life and I have just realised it now. I was told when I was ten and went to have an assessment done that I had it, but still I didn't believe it. It has felt like I have been forgetful and disorganized just because I am lazy or a bad person. It has felt like my mind has been pulled in every direction at a time and I didn't even realise that it could stay on one path. I didn't realise that it is possible to not get distracted while reading something that you are not absolutely 100% enamoured with, to read an entire page of a text book without having to go back a paragraph at least once.
I started on ADHD meds (vyvanse) a few days ago, not because I thought that I needed them, but because I knew I had the diagnosis and thought they could help me lose weight. I know I'm a shitty person for trying to cheat the system to get what I (and my ED) wants. The result has been thinking clearly for the first time ever. I have wasted 10 years of struggling through school and work and trying to please others but it was so hard. I haven't wanted to binge at all since starting and my anxiety about food choices have decreased (not all the way it's not a wonder drug).
There are side effects for me like getting super anxious for about half an hour around 3pm if I take it at 7am, and my sleep is a little worse, but I feel like how it is helping me has made up for it.
I was so so hard on myself. I thought that this is the way that everyone thinks, so why are you such a fuck up? Why can't you just clean the bathroom without thinking "Oh look there are dishes in the sink, I'll do them now before I forget", then halfway through that think "and look my books have to be put away, I'll do it now before I forget"? These are all productive things and doing stuff right when I think of them is most definitely one of the strategies I use to cope, but the fact that I can't finish anything is a bad thing too. Multiple choice questions on exams were a nightmare because focusing long enough to read the question and all the answers and think hard about each one was impossible. Checking over my work on an exam was unheard of.
It's not my fault. It's so hard to say that with how I usually treat myself, but now I have a taste of the greener grass I can never go back.
Please do yourself a favour if this sounds familiar to you and get yourself evaluated.
[Tip] Go on mybodygallery and find people that match your HW, CW, and GW.
/u/petiteautumn [5'7" | 150 | 23.5 | -60.8 | Female]
Created: Tue Aug 23 06:53:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z6asq/go_on_mybodygallery_and_find_people_that_match/
---
This helps you see the progress on other people, and it also shows what you'll look like when you've reached your goal. It's great to put side-by-side to see the difference. I use it all the time for motivation.
[Rant/Rave] On again/off again
/u/TeaCupGirl [5'8" | CW 124.8lbs | 19 | -15.2lbs |]
Created: Tue Aug 23 06:48:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z6a2z/on_againoff_again/
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I'm so tired of this constant cycle I'm in. I've never heard of anyone else having an ed this way, and I feel like a failure. Basically my ed is cyclical... When it started it was mild thoughts and urges. I was 17 and kind of a wannabe at the time because I was young, dumb, emotionally unbalanced and trying to be sicker than my mom so she'd validate my problems.
Obviously nothing really came of it, except that I have ocd. So every once in a while i'd think about it or look at thinspo but it would pass and I'd go back to my normal life.
Cut to 19: my boyfriend and I split and I move back in with my parents. I have no appetite. Food makes me sick, I lose a lot of weight. I'm seriously underweight but I've always had a touch of BD so I couldn't see that. I want to lose more but I don't really have an ed yet.
My now boyfriend helps me gain weight. This is when the issues really start. I feel fat, I try to deal with it. Something stressful happens. I use ed behaviors to cope. It goes away and comes back quicker, stronger, lasts longer. Goes away, cycle repeats. I have all the mental anguish and no progress. I lose weight, I binge it back. Lose weight, binge it back. Learn new tricks. Starve myself even easier. Binge it back.
Part of me is worried someday I won't go back to normal. (although the thoughts are near constant now). Part of me is worried I'll never actually be thin.
All of me feels like a failure.
[Other] As promised, I scanned in the Vogue book on diet and exercise for anyone who wants to have a read :)
/u/Itsemurha [177cm | 71.9kg| 22.43| -47kg | GW: 60kg | F]
Created: Tue Aug 23 06:46:34 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z69v5/as_promised_i_scanned_in_the_vogue_book_on_diet/
---
Link to download:
https://drive.google.com/file/d/0B0Tj_sbmLfPQOE5QMDZDUWJmUm8/view?usp=sharing
Please tell me if it doesn't work. I have never shared anything via google docs before o.o
[Rant/Rave] I swear to god this would only happen to me (EC stacking)
/u/toddandcopper
Created: Tue Aug 23 06:18:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z6600/i_swear_to_god_this_would_only_happen_to_me_ec/
---
I finally went to the pharmacy near me to pick up Bronkaid. Pharmicist gets all wide eyed and informed me that theyve stopped making it. No generic, no nothing.
Thanks, Obama.
EDIT to add that I live in MN, in case anyone wants to share/pm suggestions.
[Other] Breakfast for the week!
/u/petiteautumn [5'7" | 150 | 23.5 | -60.8 | Female]
Created: Tue Aug 23 06:07:43 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z64px/breakfast_for_the_week/
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I made a [smoothie](http://imgur.com/a/5Ndc2) as my breakfast for the week, total it has about 700 calories, which amounts to 100 calories for breakfast a day.
It has 1 banana, 1 cucumber, 2 tangerines, 1 cup of frozen blueberries, and one cup of greek yogurt.
Then, I divided it up into mason jars, so I just drink half for breakfast each morning. It's super filling, so I can't actually drink more than half at a time.
[Discussion] Self-care and Beauty Q+A August 23, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Tue Aug 23 06:02:45 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z63zp/selfcare_and_beauty_qa_august_23_2016/
---
Eating disorders are real, complex, and devastating conditions that can have serious consequences for physical health. Use this thread to discuss harm reduction and beauty tips, plus suggestions on how to build back up the physical self before and after engaging in disordered behaviors.
Please be wary of false advice and information. Be sure to research the facts before taking anyone's advice, no matter who they are. Remember that diagnosing members is unacceptable. **Anyone looking for medical guidance should seek the opinion of a medically licensed professional.**
*****
^Self-care ^and ^beauty ^threads ^are ^posted ^every ^Tuesday.
^Have ^any ^questions ^or ^concerns? ^Comment ^below, ^or [^PM ^the ^mods.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FproED)
[Tip] Fasting tips/advice??
/u/sademogirl
Created: Tue Aug 23 05:04:38 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z5wsw/fasting_tipsadvice/
---
[removed]
[Help] How accurate are the MFP calories gained from steps?
/u/lotuslotad [5'6 | 147.2lbs | 24.08 | -20.8lbs | F]
Created: Tue Aug 23 04:44:39 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z5umj/how_accurate_are_the_mfp_calories_gained_from/
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My Jawbone connects to my MFP and I get back calories from walking.
I'm currently at 4,205 steps and it's given me 136 calories back. That seems pretty high to me. Yesterday I was at 5,116 steps for the whole day and gained only 26 calories which seems a lot more reasonable.
Does anyone else have any experience with this? Is there a setting wrong somewhere or is it projecting my exercise for the rest of the day?
[Thinspo] My subtle thinspo for the lockscreen of my iPhone.
/u/TemporaryAccount_101 [5'3'' | AHAHAH | -5.5kgs | 18F]
Created: Tue Aug 23 02:35:47 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z5hfc/my_subtle_thinspo_for_the_lockscreen_of_my_iphone/
---
https://m.imgur.com/gallery/dRinjY7
[Help] Gym routines for a beginner who is also restricting? Help please!
/u/lightfeathers
Created: Tue Aug 23 01:58:37 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z5dtl/gym_routines_for_a_beginner_who_is_also/
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I'm thinking of signing up for a gym soon. Should I get a trainer? I want to build muscle but I don't want to eat at my TDEE because I've gained and I want to lose. Should I wait to reach my goal weight and then think of gaining muscle? Or should I start now because it'll help with my TDEE and looking leaner?
I don't know where to start, tbh. I want a lean body and to look good to help with my self esteem. But where do I start? :(
losing weight but looking fatter
/u/jrste310 [5 ft | 106 lb | 21.34 | -21.5| Female]
Created: Tue Aug 23 00:53:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z576h/losing_weight_but_looking_fatter/
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in pics i look fatter meaning im prob losing muscle not fat... ive been workin out though and eating primarily protein.. any advice?
[Rant/Rave] The only thing stopping me from suicide, is that i don't want to leave a fat corpse.
/u/MulattoKhaleesi
Created: Tue Aug 23 00:41:05 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z55ul/the_only_thing_stopping_me_from_suicide_is_that_i/
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https://www.reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z55ul/the_only_thing_stopping_me_from_suicide_is_that_i/
[Intro] Intro?
/u/NaejNire
Created: Tue Aug 23 00:26:50 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z54b4/intro/
---
I'm on mobile and have never posted here nor on reddit before, so I hope I'm doing this right!
I'm writing this from the bathroom floor after passing out from laxatives (beautiful image, right?). I figured it was about time for me to make an introduction. I've been lurking for a few weeks now and have been too afraid to say anything.
I'll leave it at that for now, as I'm not feeling too hot. But I feel I needed a group like this now more than ever! Hopefully this also gave someone a good laugh.
[Discussion] Pro-Bulimia?
/u/iamthezero
Created: Tue Aug 23 00:14:45 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z530o/probulimia/
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I'm looking for something that's focused of bulimia and purging. I can't really find anything that's recent and not proana.
[Tip] Berry binge! (~180 calories)
/u/screamingfalcon [5'7.5"/171.45cm | CW: 2fat4me | GW: 121 | UGW: 108 | F22]
Created: Mon Aug 22 22:34:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z4qz0/berry_binge_180_calories/
---
http://m.imgur.com/BmCdeHb
[Discussion] For people who reached their goal weight or ultimate goal weight did it really bring you happiness?
/u/depression-or-pms [5'4 | CW:131lbs | GW 125| GW2 115lbs | F]
Created: Mon Aug 22 22:16:43 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z4or7/for_people_who_reached_their_goal_weight_or/
---
On mobile can't flair 🙂
Hahahah @ this subway ad
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Aug 22 21:29:28 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z4ia6/hahahah_this_subway_ad/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/fcd4a1aa97904d32bf3910f1f3722917?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=5507ddf81b7e012f78d3d7ffe7e1cc52
[Discussion] Has anyone ever been caught binging mid-sloppy-frantic-binge?
/u/fckk [5'4| CW 120lbs | 20.60 | GW 115 | F]
Created: Mon Aug 22 20:44:32 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z4bpy/has_anyone_ever_been_caught_binging/
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The amount of times I've shadily binged in an apartment with 7 other roommates, in my parents house, visiting my boyfriend's apartment, etc. is astronomical. I'll wake up in the middle of the night feeling so hungry all I can think about is binging and I'll walk to the kitchen, flick the light on, and silently, quickly rummage through food. During really bad binges, I'll grab anything I can find and eat some of this, and a little of that, so no one notices food is gone. I'll mix weird combinations of food (for example, maple syrup on cheese its).
During episodes like this, I look insane. I'm shaky, jittery, fast-paced. My movements are frantic. I bend over food and shove it in my mouth, chew like a rabid animal with bits falling down my face and I'll scoop that up too. I'm bent over the counter, checking behind me.
I've only ever been caught once and I cringe TO FUCKING HELL AND BACK when I recall this time -_-.....
One of my roommates had their own cabinet full of their own food. They were possessive of their food too, commenting when things went missing (it was always me, ugh it was always me and I ALWAYS played dumb). One night at like 2am, I woke up and snuck into the kitchen to binge. I bent down and started rummaging through her cabinet. I stood up to look elsewhere and...SHE WAS STANDING THERE. She went..."uhhhh, what're you doing?" and I stuttered hopelessly, "I have a really sore throat and uh, I know you have a lot of teas and uh, can I borrow a tea bag? i'm sorry". She looked incredulous but bought it. she just happened to wake up thirsty and came to the kitchen for water. ugh.
The thought of someone catching me MID-SHOVING-FOOD-IN-MOUTH-BENT-OVER-SHAKING binge is.....literally unimaginable. I would be mortified and have..no idea how to respond.
Has anyone ever been caught? WTF DID YOU DO?
[Discussion] What do your guys' calorie plans look like?
/u/newportshorty [5'9 | fat | 19F]
Created: Mon Aug 22 20:25:35 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z48w4/what_do_your_guys_calorie_plans_look_like/
---
I'm struggling so much with getting on a schedule. I have always been so much better when on a routine because I'm a structure person I guess. I can't seem to figure out a solid one. I've tried fasting weekends, just because it's easier for me, and then going 500 calories during the week. But I want to go lower, or maybe fast more often? Just not sure. So I was wondering if you lovelies could share your ideas/what you do! Thanks :)
[Help] Anyone that went from underweight to overweight and underweight again? I have some questions.
/u/stelldichein
Created: Mon Aug 22 20:23:29 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z48kp/anyone_that_went_from_underweight_to_overweight/
---
Hello y'all
I was a chubby kid and teenager. Two years ago I reached my lowest weight (BMI of 16). After that I gained a lot of weight quickly (up to a BMI over 25... *I know I know, just horrible, worst time of my life*) and now I'm losing again. My goal is to get back to 17/16. Currently I'm around a BMI of 21.5.
I cannot trust my eyes or my perception because I literally do not know how I look like, just too much changes in such a short amount of time, so that's why I'm asking you guys.
When you got back to being underweight or just being a low healthy weight, how did you look like? The same as before or different? Did you lose weight the same way, at the same places and did you start seeing bones at the same places as before or was it different the second time around?
One thing that's "new" that I'm aware of are the stretch marks, but I just can't judge the rest. I feel like I'm losing weight differently... I really can't tell you guys :( What can I expect? Will it be different than the first time?
Please share your experiences with drastic weight loss and gain (and loss again), I'll be happy to get some insight.
[Help] Please help convince me to return the binge food.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Aug 22 19:54:24 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z43zk/please_help_convince_me_to_return_the_binge_food/
---
[deleted]
[Discussion] Low cal but sustaining breakfast ideas
/u/agentcherrycola
Created: Mon Aug 22 19:27:13 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z3zib/low_cal_but_sustaining_breakfast_ideas/
---
I work in a shop which means I have to stand for the whole shift. My shift tomorrow ends just after lunch. This means that I need to eat something in the morning otherwise I will feel faint and be shaky and this will be obvious to the other person working with me. It needs to keep me going all morning and through to a late lunch. Does anyone have any suggestions? The only thing that I've found so far is porridge, but the calories are too high if I eat enough to keep me going. My other two meals will be in company so skipping them to make up breakfast calories isn't really an option.
[Help] Warning: issue of harassment on Imgur
/u/operadiva31 [5'6" | CW 212.4 lbs | 34.42 | -25.2 lbs | UGW 131 lbs]
Created: Mon Aug 22 19:01:14 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z3vda/warning_issue_of_harassment_on_imgur/
---
So I've posted photos on imgur of my weight loss progress that I've linked here on several occasions. On basically every single post I've made, [this person](http://imgur.com/user/skinnyminnie44) has made some horrible comment about me being a hideous fat ugly bitch, or something to that extent. I've since reported every comment and sent her a message asking why the hell she feels the need to seek me out personally. Since she knows my stats, I kind of assume that she found me through this sub, which makes me really sad and really scared that she might also be harassing other people with EDs and triggering terrible things for people. I just wanted to warn people in this sub that this is going on, and perhaps prompt this user, if they are finding my posts from here, to stop harassing me.
Honestly, it's been really hard for me to even look at myself the last year or so, and I've been making a lot of progress since starting to lose weight again, so having these comments made to/about me really hurt and make me feel like shit. I know that's not what this community is about, and not what we stand for, so it breaks my heart that someone from here could be doing this.
[Discussion] Fasting and cognition?
/u/ceru1eus [67" | CW 122 | SW 122 | GW 110 | F]
Created: Mon Aug 22 18:34:53 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z3r2b/fasting_and_cognition/
---
Hi all. So I know fasting for very long obviously will make you feel physically weak, tired, etc. What are your experience with the cognitive effects? I've heard a range of things from clarity and improved cognition to feeling like a zombie... I want to fast, but I'm paranoid that it will affect my productivity. I've used that as an excuse to avoid it, so I'm curious what you guys think.
[Rant/Rave] It all just feels so empty
/u/Hiyoheyyo
Created: Mon Aug 22 18:17:52 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z3ocn/it_all_just_feels_so_empty/
---
I just moved into an apartment for this school year and we're without wifi until Thursday. Not only that but I'm also without data until tomorrow. So due to these inconveniences I haven't been able to go on social media sites, which is what I usually do to entertain myself. But I've just realized that social media, at least for me, is more of a distraction from what's really going on rather than just entertainment. I'm sitting here now, completely uninterested in doing the things I love to do (draw, read, yoga) even though I have all the time until Thursday to do it. I'm so depressed, more than I actually thought I was. I feel so numb and just want to fall asleep but it feels too early. I have no one to hang out with. I do actually, but I turned down my boyfriend because he really wants to have sex but I've also been completely uninterested in that too, to the point it disgust me just thinking about my body naked. And then my friend is out hanging with her boyfriend. I don't know what to do. I feel so fucking sad and lifeless. I've lost so much interest and everything and just want it to all stop. I've had passive thoughts of killing myself but the pathetic thing is I couldn't bare doing that, not because of the pain but because I just bleached my hair and it looks like shit right now and I wouldn't want anyone to see me looking like that dead. Like what the fuck is wrong with me. I just want to be skinny, I hate my fucking body, everything about it just disgust me.
Sorry for the rant.
I'm so glad that I have you guys to rant to because I feel as though you are the only people who truly understand what it is I'm going through. Thank you.
[Rant/Rave] Today [this isn't worth a proper title]
/u/ceru1eus [67" | CW 122 | SW 122 | GW 110 | F]
Created: Mon Aug 22 18:08:30 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z3mv6/today_this_isnt_worth_a_proper_title/
---
I'm tired. I'm alone. I'm sad. The medication isn't helping. I binged, after two weeks free.
It's the same food, almost every day. I don't know why I can't stop. I binged a perfect extra day's worth of calories, so at least if I fast through tomorrow, I'll be back on track.
The only problem? I've never made it a full 24hrs.
I got Primatine. I'm going to try EC stacking. I'm going to cut out these problem foods and hope that helps. I've said I'd do this a million times... I know that gaining control over this won't make me happy. But at least if I manage to, I'll be less miserable.
I'm going to stare at the ceiling instead of studying. I'm going to be okay with that. Tomorrow is a new day, and that's all I have right now.
I'm sorry for the downer, guys. I just needed somewhere to dump this rather than let it run circles in my head. Thanks for reading.
[Other] I'm an awful dog owner!
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Aug 22 16:56:04 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z3b65/im_an_awful_dog_owner/
---
[removed]
[Discussion] (arbitrary) survey to chart the MBTI types of proED members!
/u/smallpaint [6'2" | 165.2lb | M]
Created: Mon Aug 22 16:55:05 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z3b0e/arbitrary_survey_to_chart_the_mbti_types_of_proed/
---
https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/XGZRJV9
[Meme/Humor] Me after looking in the mirror
/u/cinamintoast [5'6" | 209 | 33.87 | -61 | F]
Created: Mon Aug 22 16:40:49 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z38no/me_after_looking_in_the_mirror/
---
https://i.imgur.com/vHP2scJ.jpg
[Help] How to be discreet at school?
/u/sossox
Created: Mon Aug 22 16:28:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z36j2/how_to_be_discreet_at_school/
---
It's pretty easy to purge in the bathroom because they're either full and loud or empty..usually no in between. My problem is with my friends. I usually leave right after lunch to purge if I ate anything at all and they have started questioning me recently. How can I cover it up? I don't want to wait too long after lunch to purge.
[Discussion] pro ana sites
/u/miadagger24
Created: Mon Aug 22 16:12:03 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z33rj/pro_ana_sites/
---
been looking around and can't find any? help
anabootcamp is gone wtf,instagram blocked out tabs,tumblr is like a ghost town, where has our community gone?
[Rant/Rave] When I'm doing good at restricting I shop...
/u/pungentthrowaway [5'1" | CW: 154 | -13 | F]
Created: Mon Aug 22 16:06:32 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z32u7/when_im_doing_good_at_restricting_i_shop/
---
I am unemployed and buying clothes I don't need that won't even fit me at this moment because I can't buy clothing at this size.
[Me rn](http://gunshowcomic.com/comics/20130109.png)
hey guys I'm back<3
/u/miadagger24
Created: Mon Aug 22 15:50:23 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z3016/hey_guys_im_back3/
---
[removed]
[Rant/Rave] I am too unbalanced to keep adulting at this level:
/u/musemusings [5'9"/129.6 lbs./18.79/28.4 lbs lost/]
Created: Mon Aug 22 14:44:37 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z2okz/i_am_too_unbalanced_to_keep_adulting_at_this_level/
---
This summer has been far, far too hard. I busted the shit out of my knee while blackout drunk, leading me to take a hard look at what kind of person I am, so that's been an interesting introspection during this journey through hell. Some idiot totaled my car and my lawyer is a straight Slipping Jimmy. I didn't realize I was supposed to be blowing up these minor injuries, but now I feel like an idiot and like I'm yet again letting someone down. My boyfriend's sister's wedding is a huge imminent event, and my seventeen year old sister decided to reveal she was pregnant SEVEN MONTHS into her magical journey, which is forcing me to remember how miserable a home my family creates. It is literally heavy with dysfunction. So I offered my sister to move in with me after graduation, which isn't until June, but still.
I am drowning in a sea of responsibilities. Lawyers, car shopping, work, creative endeavors, children, weddings. And I just want to lose weight. I clocked in at 131.1 today, which isn't too bad considering I hadn't pooped and had my glasses on. But I can't break this plateau, and I am such a vulnerable jabbering anxious open book that everyone at work knows everything about me and I can't seem to keep my mouth shut and adult like the rest of the adults. Why am I such a mess and why can't I deal? What if I am really unfixably crazy and this is how inadequate I feel forever? What if this is the best I ever achieve?
[Help] How do you track purged calories?
/u/sossox
Created: Mon Aug 22 14:43:37 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z2odw/how_do_you_track_purged_calories/
---
I'm new to restricting. I've been counting calories with my fitness pal and right now I'm about 134 calories above my 1000 goal. I purged after lunch and I know I got a good amount up but I'm not sure if I should leave the calories in my diary or try to estimate the amount I purged out. Either way I feel like shit. This is the first time I've ever felt guilty for eating a salad, because it pushed me over my goal.
[Rant/Rave] I have to refeed a starved, skinny, and malnourished cat. My head is a mess.
/u/smokesanddietcokes [<3 ]
Created: Mon Aug 22 14:23:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z2kv4/i_have_to_refeed_a_starved_skinny_and/
---
We lost our cat two years ago, and it broke our hearts. Today I get a message on Facebook from someone who thought they found her. They brought the cat over.. it is starved, matted, skinny. I don't think she's the cat I lost, but I think this cat is in such a state it would be unrecognisable to anyone. We took a vet trip. The cat is old (right age for my missing cat, tbh..) and malnourished and too much underweight, but otherwise no illness they can tell or injuries. My mother and I decided to keep the cat. My mother is sure it's our missing cat, even though I am unsure.
I am now tasked with refeeding.
Refeeding. Recovery.
Recovery for this cat from malnourishment, from a state of being underweight. I know how to do it. I know what foods are needed. I went to the store and got everything. That's not the problem..
My head is a mess.
I look at the cat and know the cat does not want to be starved, underweight, poor condition. She wants to be fed, to have it's tummy better and to be able to handle food again, and get regular feedings. That's what the cat wants. The cat is so weak and so tired. She wants to eat. She tries but her tummy is so not used to food that she throws it up from eating too much. She doesn't want to throw up the food. We need to make sure she has smaller portions, but she wants to eat bigger ones. *She wants to eat*.
So why don't I want that? Why do I want the opposite? Why do I want to be underweight, tired, that skinny?
I hug and stroke this cat and am shocked at her bones. I have a pit in my stomach that grows deeper with every bump of her spine, every sharp edge that feels as if it's about to rip through her skin. I feel panic at the state of her. Worry at the lack of fat and flesh on her body. I hate how she is so underweight.
I need to feed this cat.
I feel my own sharp bones in my shoulders, the only part of my body that I feel is skinny enough.. and feel pride. I don't feel a pit, except for how the rest of my body doesn't match. How my stomach is fatty and flabby. I have too much flesh everywhere else. I need the rest of my body to match. I am not underweight, I need to *be* underweight.
I need to stop feeding myself.
Why am I so desperate to help this cat eat and put on weight and be healthy, go to the store and load my basket up with foods for her, but just as desperate - if not more so, in all honesty - to do the opposite to myself?
This cat may not be my missing cat, but I love her already.
[Rant/Rave] Mood today
/u/BluestNovember [5'4" | SW: 200+ lbs | CW: too high | BMI: over 30 | -20lbs | F]
Created: Mon Aug 22 14:11:14 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z2ikb/mood_today/
---
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XVk_e31dnlE&index=1&list=RDXVk_e31dnlE
[Discussion] What's your Myers-Briggs type?
/u/throwaway912837198 [5'8" | 116 | 17.6 | F]
Created: Mon Aug 22 14:05:27 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z2hid/whats_your_myersbriggs_type/
---
I'm an INFJ.
I'm also guessing that INFJ will be overrepresented on this subreddit because INFJs more inclined to be perfectionists who worry about not living up to our potential and care deeply about the suffering of others (the compassion on this subreddit is boundless).
*I'm aware that Myers-Briggs isn't very scientifically valid, but it's fun to talk about!
[Meme/Humor] Goddammit captcha...
/u/throwawayyaymatehaha [5'3" | CW: 94 | 17.11 | -32 | F]
Created: Mon Aug 22 14:02:34 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z2gyu/goddammit_captcha/
---
http://imgur.com/a/CAOjL
[Meme/Humor] At least my computer knows how I feel
/u/throwawayyaymatehaha [5'3" | CW: 94 | 17.11 | -32 | F]
Created: Mon Aug 22 13:59:13 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z2gc9/at_least_my_computer_knows_how_i_feel/
---
http://imgur.com/a/u9y00
[Goal] If only I had any self control, I could reach my goal by not eating at all!
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Aug 22 13:43:17 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z2die/if_only_i_had_any_self_control_i_could_reach_my/
---
https://i.reddituploads.com/2eae6675a1e34a549337c3fd8b883f3a?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=f1208f6b76f38ab294a33fe793c4b0c4
[Other] Totally not super obvious grocery haul
/u/_-TAWat-_ [5'3" | 31F | UGW 110.2#]
Created: Mon Aug 22 13:25:34 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z2a7u/totally_not_super_obvious_grocery_haul/
---
https://i.redd.it/xi75dfiiizgx.jpg
[Other] Today I said goodbye to my granddad for the last time
/u/AmAlreadyGoingToHell
Created: Mon Aug 22 12:57:28 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z24xs/today_i_said_goodbye_to_my_granddad_for_the_last/
---
I binged so hard today. I'm gonna miss him so badly.
[Goal] Personal achievement unlocked :)
/u/DenyMyHunger [5'7"| Fat! |GW 140| UGW 112|-7lbs | F]
Created: Mon Aug 22 12:52:47 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z2420/personal_achievement_unlocked/
---
Hello lovelies!
This is gonna sound so stupid but I haven't been able to leave the house unaccompanied in months due to my depression and anxiety.
Today I was going over my grocery list of low cal foods to stock up on and I realised it would be cheaper to get them from Aldi which is a 10min walk away (I usually get my groceries delivered) so I put my list in a backpack, grabbed some money and went down by myself! It took about an hour of negotiating with myself but I did it!
I know this seems trivial and silly but its such a big deal to me, I'm so pleased with myself and now I have a fridge and cupboard full of very low cal veggies and cup-a-soups for so much cheaper!
[Other] [other]Hey, thanks to everyone xx
/u/littleIceBear [4' 10" | 99 | F]
Created: Mon Aug 22 12:37:06 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z213o/otherhey_thanks_to_everyone_xx/
---
I intro'ed recently and you made me feel welcome. Im so sorry i didnt respond, my net is lousy because i live in nowhere, AK.
That, and life got worse as it always does when i reach out. I live wit an asshole. Thanks, everyone who gave me loves in my post. Im not worth it, if i was i wouldnt keep ending up being the bad guy xx
[Help] I need help
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Aug 22 12:22:34 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z1yes/i_need_help/
---
[removed]
[Rant/Rave] I wish I never had to eat
/u/cinamintoast [5'6" | 209 | 33.87 | -61 | F]
Created: Mon Aug 22 10:52:22 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z1h82/i_wish_i_never_had_to_eat/
---
I have been fasting since Saturday night. I love how simple fasting is. No meal planning, no calorie counting, no guilt, just don't eat. Usually once I make it past the 24 hour mark, I don't really feel hungry anymore, or at least I become numb to it. I stop thinking about food constantly. I can just enjoy my life without obsessing about food. My life would be so much easier if I just never had to eat. I will probably end my fast tonight or tomorrow morning and I'm already dreading when those obsessive thoughts and guilt come rushing back.
[Rant/Rave] Week-long binge cycle. Started purging again, wasted a ton of money, still gained 2 lbs.
/u/realbutterflybaby [5'1" | CW: 105±1 GW: 88±1 | -26 lbs | F]
Created: Mon Aug 22 10:43:03 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z1fh3/weeklong_binge_cycle_started_purging_again_wasted/
---
I hate myself.
[Rant/Rave] Hello semester of forced fasting, you have been greatly anticipated!
/u/Missy_Is_Bitter [5'3"| Faaaaaaaaaaat | -23lbs | F]
Created: Mon Aug 22 10:40:37 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z1f0r/hello_semester_of_forced_fasting_you_have_been/
---
Today is my first day back on campus and I am SO EXCITED. I'm on campus for like 12 hours at least three days a week between work and classes. Pretty much all by myself all day. And no one can hold me accountable for what I have or have not eaten because no one will be around that much since I'm kind of a friendless loser!
-does a happy dance-
There are also lots of food options on and around campus that I could very easily get food at. So if I say "oh, I walked over to Cheba Hut and got a pot themed sandwich and some chips" or "I got some scary campus sushi," or something like that, no one will really question it. And I'm going to completely circumvent my desire to actually go buy food like a piggy by just not bringing money with me to campus everyday. I'm gonna use a smaller wallet and just keep my IDs, a bus pass, and maybe $5 in emergency money in it. My debit card and everything else will be staying firmly at home all semester. And I don't drive so it's not like I can go get it. :D
One of my dance classes is a night class on a day where I'm not on campus otherwise, and so I'm going to be able to try and restrict all day (which I can do the two days a week in not on campus anyway), and not have to worry about being bullied into eating. I leave before my fiancé gets home from work and I'll just tell him I had a meal before dance, and he's the only one who notices and give a fuck when I don't eat.
I'm so excited. I am going to drop weight this semester like nobody's fucking business. All I have to worry about are Thursday night dinners and weekends. But I can force myself to fast at least three days a week with no alternative plan until December! ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
Now I just have to decide if I want to take a banned books and censorship lit class to bump myself up to 15 credits or stay with 12 (5 of which are art and dance credits).
[Tip] Let today be your reset day. All the days before today that you've fixated on correcting by restricting heavily, forget them.
/u/gastastic [5'1 | 123 | 26F]
Created: Mon Aug 22 10:36:37 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z1e9f/let_today_be_your_reset_day_all_the_days_before/
---
I wind up keeping tallies of all the awful binge days I've had, and they've accumulated to a ton. I feel guilty for binge days I had months ago, and still feel like I have to restrict to make up for those days.
Well, a week ago I decided to have a clean break from those days. Starting last Monday, right after a bingey weekend, I decided to track EVERYTHING. I ate double my daily caloric intake yesterday, and still tracked everything. Over the past week, my average daily caloric intake has been 900 calories. Even with the couple of binges.
Starting fresh has somehow made my restricting easier to attain. I've had a few days of 400 or less. And seeing how my binge days aren't as detrimental as I've thought, it's so much less pressure. I feel like this has been exactly what I needed to get back on track to my goals. From maintaining and gaining for the past few months, I'm consistently losing again.
Alternatively, give yourself a weekly goal. Daily caloric goal× 7. For me? I'll say 1000. So, with all calories consumed for this week, I hit 6844, so still under goal. Despite all the oreos and cookie dough ice cream?! Yes. And today starts a new week. MOVE FORWARD, NOT BACK.
Do yourself a favor and let go. Make today your new day 1.
[Discussion] Daily Food Diary! August 22, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Mon Aug 22 10:02:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z1862/daily_food_diary_august_22_2016/
---
This is a daily food diary thread for August 22, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
[Rant/Rave] Sigh. I guess I just need some support guys.
/u/StoicallySpeaking [5'8" | 150.8 | 22.9 | -30 | M]
Created: Mon Aug 22 09:19:48 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z10kq/sigh_i_guess_i_just_need_some_support_guys/
---
I'm a long time lurker, but now I feel like I have to post or I will go completely crazy, I need to hear from people that understand.
So I have lost weight successfully restricting for a while. Things have gone great, been slowly getting thinner, starting to lose more from my chest, and my ribs and hip bones are finally starting to show again.
But I have been binge eating again, and I am scared. Scared, because this is how my weight gained happened last time, and sure enough, the scale is starting to go up again.
Last time, I lost weight down to my lowest weight ever and I guess I got complacent. Right now, I have been trying to diet 'normally' (1200 cal) at an attempt to recover, just like before, but it just ends up with binge eating, and weight gain. I don't want it to happen like it did last time, where I end up back at square one. My issue is that I try to recover before getting down to where I want to be, truly.
Please tell me I can do this. I am so anxious all my hard work will have been for naught. Having to go through this hell, the b/p, the lying, the sneaking, JUST to get to the disgusting weight I am now sounds completely daunting.
Please just tell me I can do this. I want more than anything to not go back. I need to get back on this goddamn wagon!
SIDE NOTE
I have purchased Brain over Binge recovery guide [2016] (Sequel to brain over binge). If anyone wants the PDF, just PM.
[Meme/Humor] A common refrain
/u/Thunder2WonderThighs
Created: Mon Aug 22 09:17:28 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z1065/a_common_refrain/
---
Mom: You look amazing! You aren't starving yourself are you?
Me: How dare you!
Mom: My bad, my bad. Sorry.
Me: *Fasts for 4 days *
[Help] Weight projector calculator?
/u/Briismars46 [5"6 | CW:123 | 19.85 |GW:109 | F]
Created: Mon Aug 22 09:05:05 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z0xzt/weight_projector_calculator/
---
There was a site linked here awhile ago that I'm looking for again. You input how many calories you eat daily and then it gives you your weight for every week or so maybe? It goes way down, so you can check and be like if I'm eating 400 calories a day I'll be XXXlbs by January 25 or whatever?
[Rant/Rave] I'm back from vacation and down .2lbs!
/u/supersizetrainwreck [5'9 | CW 130.7lb | 18.95 | F]
Created: Mon Aug 22 08:40:37 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z0txh/im_back_from_vacation_and_down_2lbs/
---
Good morning my favorite ladies and gents! I'm back from my week of vacation and while I'm not really happy to be back at work I'm at least not unhappy with myself when it comes to this. So traveling was crazy, but I went to so many places (5 places in 9 days) that there wasn't really any time to rest which meant lots of walking. We averaged about 10-12 miles per day and on the highest day did somewhere between 16 and 20. Unfortunately I realized once I got to the airport to leave that I forgot my fitbit :( I was super disappointed but estimated the walking amounts based on the step counter on my bf's phone. Since we were both watching ourselves it was relatively easy not to overeat. No one really questioned it if I said I wasn't hungry or ate something relatively small for the day. There were a few meals where I had nothing and watched other people eat, and most breakfasts if anything were small like a yogurt or a single piece of bread with jam. This isn't to say I didn't indulge a bit, in Brussels and Amsterdam I had waffles with caramel or nutella, and I did have some things that I wouldn't have had had I been home, but I wasn't too upset with myself except for once. I was able to talk to my bf about it that once and he made me feel better and was helpful the next day by not being pushy which was great. Part of the reason we (both bf and I which made it that much easier) were being so restrictive was because the end of the trip was a wedding where I needed to make sure I fit into my dress and him his suit, which we did! But on the night of the wedding I went a little overboard, I felt very full at the end of the night, but the food was so spread out over 8 hours that I'm not sure if I really went that far overboard or I just felt more full because I was digesting everything in between courses. I did manage to EC stack a bit while I was there, most days only 1 dose but one day I did do 2. Anyway, I got home last night and slept 8 hours and woke up this morning kind of dreading going on the scale. I thought I'd gained at least a pound or two and was just hopeful it was going to be bloat from the wedding and would go down within the next few days (which I'm still hoping for) but instead I'm down .2 lbs and my bf is down too! I know it's not much but spending that long without being able to count calories or track steps was so nerve-wracking! I was 136.2 before I left and this morning I'm 136.0 which is a new lowest adult weight. I really wanted to share this with everyone to show that all my hard work the last 2 months wasn't for nothing and to show that you can be restrictive on vacation and still have a good time. Hope I didn't miss anything too exciting while I was gone, I'll do my best to catch up and /r/proED stuff over the next few days.
[Rant/Rave] For the first time in three or four months, I believe I can actually do this thing
/u/goddamnroommate [5'6" | 143.1 | 23.17 | -50ish | F]
Created: Mon Aug 22 08:37:31 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z0tev/for_the_first_time_in_three_or_four_months_i/
---
For the past couple of months I have been maintaining. Not in a "go you! you're recovering!" kind of way. More like a "eat 5000 calories and then starve for two days" kind of way. So that's been disheartening to say the least.
A couple of weeks ago, I stopped focusing on my weight and tried for 1000 calories a day. I usually ended up around 1300-1500 and that was acceptable to me. Then I weighed myself and was at 147ish lbs. Which was wholly unacceptable. What I logically understood but my ED didn't was that I was on my period and hadn't pooped (sry) in like 4 days. I binged hardcore on saturday, didn't eat sunday and weighed myself last night and this morning.
HOLY CRAP YOU GUYS! I weighed in at 143.1lbs this morning and I could not be happier. Even *with* the massive Saturday binge! The 1000 calorie thing must have worked. I like knowing that i have a form of sustainable weight loss. I'm on top of the world today. This is the first time that i've dipped solidly into the 143 range for about 2 months.
I'm not going to fuck this up with a binge ("because I can afford the extra calories"). I'm going to fast all of today until date night, and then I will **enjoy** myself with whichever entree (reasonably) that I want. No dessert, obviously, but just no guilt over eating a single, normal meal.
And further, i finally believe in myself. I finally am at a point where I'm not just faking the confidence that I can lose the weight. IDK it seemed like I was just going through the motions, resigned to the fact that i'd be forever 144. But i think it finally got through to me that I *can* change that. I have that power and that control.
thanks for reading :3
tl;dr math works, believe in it; belif in urself
[Rant/Rave] lately ive been having so many dreams about eating
/u/turnonmyrighthand [4'9 | 86lb | F]
Created: Mon Aug 22 08:11:03 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z0p5f/lately_ive_been_having_so_many_dreams_about_eating/
---
haha, theyre horrible! last night i dreamt i ate 2 containers of halo top and a frappucino with chocolate chips in it :( the night before i dreamt i ate pizza. the whole time im feeling guilty and i wake up and think i really did that lol. its the worst
[Rant/Rave] So apparently my choices are fat or sick.
/u/PaisleyStars
Created: Mon Aug 22 07:53:47 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z0mfu/so_apparently_my_choices_are_fat_or_sick/
---
Definite rant incoming because I am the grumpiest human being right now.
I was doing amazingly. I was the kind of thin where people kept telling me and other people how thin I was. Then I got ill in such a way that I got prescribed steroids. If you haven't been prescribed steroids before, let me tell you this: you will retain every bit of water you even think about consuming. I haven't been this squishy in a very long time.
The thing is, *I* know it's just water weight. I know I haven't gained 2 dress sizes of fat while still eating at a deficit. But nobody else is going to know that. Nobody's going to think 'ooh, that is clearly a thin person who has taken some very aggressive medication'. They're going to think 'holy fuck, you got fat.'
[Help] I accidentally took 2 Bronkaid pills (and 1 caffeine pill). Is that okay..?
/u/bumblebatty [5'7| 117 | 18.26 | -53 | F | GW 115 | UGW 108?]
Created: Mon Aug 22 07:26:00 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z0ifo/i_accidentally_took_2_bronkaid_pills_and_1/
---
I took one Bronkaid, then caffeine, then another Bronkaid because I forgot about the first.
Has anyone done this or know what it will do?
Trying to Google it now..
[Thinspo] Monday Morning Thinspo
/u/WeighingDown [5'2" | 113 | 21.41 | F]
Created: Mon Aug 22 07:11:35 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z0gev/monday_morning_thinspo/
---
https://www.instagram.com/darias.dreamland/
[Help] ECA Stack Questions!
/u/WeighingDown [5'2" | 113 | 21.41 | F]
Created: Mon Aug 22 07:08:43 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z0fzd/eca_stack_questions/
---
Hello!
I just started doing an ECA stack today. I did a lot of reading and decided to do 24 mg Ephedrine hcl, 200 mg caffeine, and 81 mg aspirin once a day. I've read that people have had varied results with the aspirin. The one I got is enteric coated and recommended for daily use so hopefully I don't run in to any issues. I've also read that people replace the aspirin with fish oil. What has your experience been?
Also, how should I go about the cycles? I want to try and keep it at one dosage a day just out of fear, but if people are okay doing two, perhaps I will be too?
As a side note, I can't believe how well this is working. I've had hardly any food today and I haven't had a single craving and I'm full of a focused energy. This is amazing.
Thanks in advanced for your help!!
~K
[Discussion] Weekly Stats Update! August 22, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Mon Aug 22 06:03:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z07ay/weekly_stats_update_august_22_2016/
---
This is the weekly status thread for August 22, 2016.
The weekly status thread is to help motivate our users, and to eventually see how far they've come! Be it for weight loss, weight gain, or maintaining- everyone is welcome. Previous updates are archived [here.](http://www.reddit.com/r/proED/wiki/archives)
Please include the following information (with all necessary units of measurement):
* Height:
* Current weight (CW):
* Highest weight (HW):
* Lowest weight (LW):
* Goal weight (GW):
* Ultimate goal weight (UGW):
* Weight lost (WL):
* BMI: ([Use this to calculate your BMI](https://people.maths.ox.ac.uk/trefethen/bmi_calc.html))
* Age:
* Gender expression:
Here's a handy-dandy copy/paste of the above format:
* Height:
* CW:
* HW:
* LW:
* GW:
* UGW:
* WL:
* BMI:
* Age:
* Gender expression:
*****
^Status ^threads ^are ^posted ^every ^Monday.
^Have ^any ^questions ^or ^concerns? ^Comment ^below, ^or [^PM ^the ^mods.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FproED)
[Help] Can't sleep anymore:(
/u/sveltevelvet [5"8 | GW: 105-115 | -16 lbs | 18F]
Created: Mon Aug 22 05:30:01 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z031h/cant_sleep_anymore/
---
A few weeks ago I made a post about whether or not fasting/high restriction makes you sleepy. Since then I've been restricting quite more heavily, and fasting a few days a week. Subsequently I've been feeling so tired/ low on energy, but I have been struggling to get to sleep. Months ago before my eating became really restricted, I would starve the whole day at school but come home and eat half a day's worth of calories, then nap, wake up and eat more then go back to sleep.
I was so tired, but now I'm really finding it hard to sleep. :( I miss my after-school naps. I thought it could be caffeine but I think even in the past I still napped after drinking a lot of coffee. Not getting enough sleep is really affecting my mental health and I feel like my mind is never rested
**Edit:** Thank you everyone for your advice and sharing your experiences. I'll look into sleep supplements- in the past I've used short-term medication (doxylamine I think) but now the pharmacist is a lot more strict about giving it out.Maybe eating something small before bed will help too.
[Other] Thought some of you might find this interesting: excerpts from a Vogue diet and exercise book produced in 1980.
/u/Itsemurha [177cm | 71.9kg| 22.43| -47kg | GW: 60kg | F]
Created: Mon Aug 22 05:29:44 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4z0304/thought_some_of_you_might_find_this_interesting/
---
http://imgur.com/a/XD2Ku
[Intro] At my wit's end.
/u/isolatedintrovert [155cm | CW: 46kg | GW: 40kg | 19.93 | F]
Created: Mon Aug 22 03:30:12 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yzqdp/at_my_wits_end/
---
No matter what I do, the number doesn't change. Every time I step on the scale, whether I've eaten that day/the day before/in two days or not, the number doesn't change. The fat continues to sit on my hips, my abs, my butt. I've tried to be healthier about it (having a spouse who is aware and ensures I eat a healthy amount when we dine together helps), but obviously the "healthy" route isn't working.
I told myself I'd never break 100 lbs, but here I am... 2 years *after* crossing that point and I just can't get back down. I feel like I'm at the end of my rope. Is it the fear of losing my boobs (which, while smaller than I'd like, are the only part of my body I feel isn't too fat) that is keeping me from being better about this?
I've only eaten 200 calories so far today, and I honestly don't even feel hungry for more, but I've got work tomorrow. How am I supposed to find that balance?
Sorry, I've got a lot on my mind and I can't share it with anyone IRL. I hope to find kindred spirits in this community. Thanks for reading.
is there another pro-ana sub where everyone is actually anorexic?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Aug 22 00:52:16 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yzb5u/is_there_another_proana_sub_where_everyone_is/
---
[removed]
[Discussion] Calorie intake after 12am
/u/concuidado [4'11 | 89 lbs | 19.21 | -51| F]
Created: Mon Aug 22 00:31:38 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yz97u/calorie_intake_after_12am/
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When you guys eat past 12am do you count the calories for the day you've been up or the following day? Like, if you wake up on Monday the 12th and stay up past midnight, do you log the calories for Monday the 12th or Tuesday the 13th because that's technically what it is. I always log it on the day I've been up but I was just curious.
[Rant/Rave] I want my ED back
/u/saptashati [5'6" | 153.6 | 24.6 | 26.4 | F]
Created: Sun Aug 21 23:55:36 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yz5fb/i_want_my_ed_back/
---
After a month and a half of binging or regular eating, I just feel so fat and bloated and all I want is to stop eating and be thin again. Like I hate my newly rotund stomach and all the water weight.
I wish I had the self control to just stop stuffing myself with food. At the airport yesterday I had two margaritas, nachos, McDonald's and cheesecake. Today I had an extra 500 calories of Dairy Queen! What's wrong with me? I can't stop eating until I feel so uncomfortably full I want to cry.
I just feel so discontent and anxious with my life. Nothing is wrong per se but everything is. I miss my ex boyfriend, I'm jealous of my friends and I have to find a job. I think dieting and losing weight is my first step to fixing the rest of it.
[Rant/Rave] I am a huge fat fat whale girl
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Aug 21 20:45:11 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yyihb/i_am_a_huge_fat_fat_whale_girl/
---
[deleted]
[Meme/Humor] So I hit a certain number
/u/negativeraisins [5'0" | 69 lb | 14.19 | -53 lb | FTM]
Created: Sun Aug 21 20:41:42 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yyi09/so_i_hit_a_certain_number/
---
69 pounds.
I did it.
I hit the meme number.
[Help] Is "instinctive refeeding" for reparation's sake a thing, after one's body's been starved and pushed for a while? Or am i just justifying my binges?
/u/cannibale101 [5'5 | HW:150smtg | CW:120,8 | GW:118 | 28F]
Created: Sun Aug 21 20:33:01 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yygvn/is_instinctive_refeeding_for_reparations_sake_a/
---
Yeah so i've been heavily restricting/fasting for about 6 months straight + working out 5-7 times a week (1hr cardio + 45min muscu) + hardly getting half my sleep because of this manic-ish phase. I've lost a bit since May but after a while i became endlessly tired (no shit lol) and began to fear the inevitable moment when i just couldn't keep going like that. It eventually happened and i went all bingey & lazy for a week. I read Never Binge Again and concluded that i needed more discipline against my "Inner Pig". I managed to stop the bingey thing for two weeks after that, felt a bit re-energized by the small break and tried to go back to heavy restriction and daily workouts. But then i crashed again this week : haven't worked out in a week, i have very nutrients-oriented cravings (like wanting any kind of complex carbs or protein like crazy) and yesterday i FINALLY achieved a real night's sleep : 13hrs!!! Haven't slept like that in several months. My weight has stayed the exact same all this time, making me wonder what the hell is going on inside my body these days.
(I talked about feeling lost and desperate about it all to my boyfriend this weekend ; he offered me a nice bowl of rice with legumes and vegetables and we had a quiet movie night together before i fell so deeply asleep. He seemed really happy to see me eat and sleep like that since i've been very secretive and tense for quite a while now. Felt like i was coming home from some invisible war and he finally got to take care of me. I love that guy.)
Anyhow.
It seems pretty clear to me that my body doesn't like how i've been treating it. I knew that, obviously, but i didn't know it could come back at me so harshly. I feel that maybe what i need is not more discipline like Never Binge Again says, but to learn how to listen to my body's needs more, to work as a team with it so it won't drive me crazy as revenge after i push it too much. But on the other hand, maybe i'm just justifying all those binges and getting back to the mindset that got me fat and lazy in the first place. I want to keep losing, i'm certainly not done.
What do you guys think? Do you have those dialogues between you and your bodies? Can you just discipline yourselves despite its protests without going crazy? How?? Is this even how bodies work or am i just imagining all this?
[Rant/Rave] Thoughts about binging and recovering from BED
/u/kpatable [5'9" | 125.1 | 18.1/18.5 | -21.9 | F]
Created: Sun Aug 21 19:49:32 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yyaqu/thoughts_about_binging_and_recovering_from_bed/
---
So, after being diagnosed with BED, it basically terrified me into fixing my binging. And I'm doing that. My urge to binge lessens every day. And I think it's because I've been eating more intuitively. If I'm hungry, I'll eat; if I have a craving, I'll satisfy it eventually; if I'm full, I won't eat; etc. I feel like I'm in a limbo between normal and disordered since I'm still probably going to end up being underweight in a few months, but I'm giving my body enough nourishment. What I'm learning to do is have *balance*. A balance between self control and nourishment. And I'm also learning to not try to get fast results. This takes an acceptance of my body as it is, and it takes patience. But I think that's the best way to do it. I don't think there is a healthy or sustainable way to lose weight quickly. That idea is frustrating, but accepting it is liberating.
[Discussion] How common are heart issues with EDs?
/u/sossox
Created: Sun Aug 21 19:03:15 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yy48o/how_common_are_heart_issues_with_eds/
---
So I usually just ignore all of the bad things that could happen to me because of my ED but for some reason I'm more worried than usual about my heart. I'm an athlete and have been restricting/purging for a while and get lightheaded really easily. I've heard this is a bad sign and something could be going on with my heart. So how common is it? Is it just the rare side effect that antiED use to discourage EDs? How many of you have had heart troubles?
[Discussion] Purging
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Aug 21 18:21:18 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yxy6v/purging/
---
[removed]
[Rant/Rave] Just had to share some of the happy I've been having
/u/operadiva31 [5'6" | CW 212.4 lbs | 34.42 | -25.2 lbs | UGW 131 lbs]
Created: Sun Aug 21 17:45:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yxt4c/just_had_to_share_some_of_the_happy_ive_been/
---
So I went on vacation with my mom last week to an all-inclusive resort in the Dominican Republic. It was absolutely wonderful. I walked all over, danced a bunch, and also ate and drank whatever I wanted. I fully expected to come home having gained weight, but to my surprise, **I lost two pounds!!!!!** I came back home on Wednesday morning, and since then, I've lost half a pound a day! Today I had an iced coffee, went grocery shopping, and just got fruits, veggies, some low fat cottage cheese - no binge food, and no unhealthy stuff, and my current obsession: Califia Farms XX Espresso cold brew coffee with almond milk (only 80 cal/serving), and then did [meal prep](http://imgur.com/gallery/V9kvZ) for the week. I made a serving of salmon (prepped in different low cal ways), a serving of brown rice, and a serving of steamed veggies for each night. I plan to have a vegan protein shake using the XX each morning, since I start back to school this week, some raw veggies (possibly with a bit of hummus) to snack on through the day, if I find I need lunch, I have berries and cottage cheese, and one of my prepped meals for dinner. This should put me well under 1,000 cal/day (913 cal if I eat everything listed and nothing else). This seems like a really easy eating plan for me throughout the school year, and for weight loss. I took new [progress photos](http://imgur.com/gallery/UxiaA), and even though I'm still fat and not even close to my ideal weight or shape, I have made definite progress, and my stomach is definitely getting smaller. So I'm trying to schedule my semester to have time to go to the gym on campus during a class break. I should find out if that's possible tomorrow. And I'm getting my hair redone tomorrow!
[Meme/Humor] [Humor] The troubles of high-waist non-stretch skinny jeans :(
/u/poop_dawg [5'8" | CW: 145 | GW: 110 | BMI: 22 | +10lbs | F]
Created: Sun Aug 21 17:05:34 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yxncw/humor_the_troubles_of_highwaist_nonstretch_skinny/
---
http://i.imgur.com/8mUPsiZ.jpg
[Rant/Rave] Lost 18 pounds but.... (Rant)
/u/sprinkle1997 [5'1 | CW 138 GW 100 | -18 lbs | 19F]
Created: Sun Aug 21 15:46:07 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yxawz/lost_18_pounds_but_rant/
---
Sorry for no flair, on mobile. Stats: 5'1", 138 lbs, 19F
I shed a fairly significant amount of weight within the past 3 months (went from 156 to 138) but I'm still so disgusted with myself. I feel even fatter than before. Shouldn't I feel happy and motivated instead of like this? Looking in the mirror makes me wanna cry, I just wanna be thin. I feel so sad and alone because of these thoughts
[Discussion] What a lot of people don't understand about ED
/u/stephanynotstokes [5'6 |Weight Lost: 70 lbs | F]
Created: Sun Aug 21 15:38:49 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yx9ow/what_a_lot_of_people_dont_understand_about_ed/
---
People like to often compare EDs to other addictions (drugs, gambling, sex etc.) but the problem is. You don't NEED drugs, you don't NEED to gamble, you don't NEED sex, but you DO need food. PERIOD. There is no way around this. There are no if ands or buts, if you don't eat you WILL die.
And thats the thing. We can't avoid our food issues because food is everywhere all the time, its a 24/7, 365 days a year thing and I don't think people really get that.
Having an eating disorder, it never ever ever shuts off, no matter where I go or what Im doing its always on my mind.
Its really just ....terrible.
[Rant/Rave] having a dad who is a piece of shit
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Aug 21 15:23:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yx70t/having_a_dad_who_is_a_piece_of_shit/
---
[deleted]
Has anybody had liposuction?
/u/kursedsun
Created: Sun Aug 21 14:57:16 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yx2er/has_anybody_had_liposuction/
---
Hi everybody,
Not sure if this topic has been discussed in the past but was curious if anybody had lipo done. Are you satisfied with your results?
I had lipo done by Sono Bello three years ago and at first I loved my results and thought I didn't need to watch what I ate anymore (silly, I know). I was 143 lbs and then immediately after my procedure I was down to 138 lbs. I'm also 5'7".
However now, I'm the fattest I've ever been, weighing at 159 lbs as of last week and restricting again. Today I'm at 149 lbs so yay progress. So I'm working towards my goal weight of 120 lbs.
There's a bright side, right?
Can't flair, on mobile.
[Rant/Rave] Hitting a turning point today
/u/cailindana0908 [5' 7''| CW 123 GW 110 | 19.7| -19lbs | F]
Created: Sun Aug 21 14:07:12 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4ywt85/hitting_a_turning_point_today/
---
Hey everyone, so I have creeped on this sub for a while and literally just started posting the odd comment yesterday.
Today inspired by all of you, I avoided what would have been a huge and terrible binge. I was forced to go out for a meal with my family before I moved out for work experience. We went to such a nice restaurant and I had to eat every single bite of a huge, delicious and calorie filled meal, because my parents are totally aware of my disordered eating patterns and were watching me like a pair of hawks. I got a club sandwich and chips and a ridiculous slice of chocolate fudge cake and could barely breathe after, I didn't even enjoy it because all I could think was "Cailín Dána you are going to hate yourself after this",
So anyway, when I was dropped off to my new accommodation for work experience I was in total binge mode and walked around the new town until I found the most amazing smelling take-away, I went inside and ordered a meal of a massive juicy cheese burger, chips and coke, the full works, went and bought Kinder Beunos and Toffee Crisp bars in the grocery shop next door, and I was fantasising about this binge as I walked back to my new house.
Then I had a complete change of heart, I said hold on, am I going to fuck this all up for myself and instead of having a calorific surplus of maybe 5/600 calories that I can burn and restrict off throughout the week, or will I treble that and gain and be bloated and miserable?
So I turned around and threw it all in the bin. In my room now drinking water and I genuinely feel like today was a milestone of sorts. Going to join the local gym tomorrow (it was closed when i went tonight, another binge trigger!) and work off the excess and just restrict a wee bit harder than planned. I am in a state of shock at myself but small progress is still progress right?
Sorry for the ramble just wanted to share, and also hello again everyone! :)
[Meme/Humor] What I'm like even if they're not **special** brownies
/u/BluestNovember [5'4" | SW: 200+ lbs | CW: too high | BMI: over 30 | -20lbs | F]
Created: Sun Aug 21 13:00:03 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4ywghv/what_im_like_even_if_theyre_not_special_brownies/
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http://imgur.com/a/L4lCs
[Discussion] Vegan folks on here?
/u/FaithHopeTrick [5'7 | CW 123 GW 119 |19.20 | -32lbs | F]
Created: Sun Aug 21 12:30:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4ywavd/vegan_folks_on_here/
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Hey guys
Hope y'all are having a good Sunday. I just watched Harry Potter so mines going well :) I have been veggie (no fish) for years and I've been eating more and more vegan food. I feel like I'm almost ready to properly make the change - like quitting smoking I can't just decide to do it, I have to get there slowly.
Browsing vegan subs on Reddit a lot of them seem super excited about diary replacements and making really good imitation food like pizzas, cake, ice cream, Mexican food minus diary etc. Which is fab it all looks amazing. But it's not really a calorie focused place and I want to be vegan and ~700 calories a day, but not JUST living on boiled veg. Any suggestions for low cal vegan meals?
[Discussion] What do you do to fight off cravings?
/u/nymph-y [5'7'' | CW: 138 | -50 | F]
Created: Sun Aug 21 12:21:15 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yw94a/what_do_you_do_to_fight_off_cravings/
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I find that I get especially hungry at night and tend to cave to my cravings at that point. Any tips on things I can do to take my mind off bad cravings?
[Help] I've been binging for almost a month now.
/u/lightfeathers
Created: Sun Aug 21 11:35:36 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yw0cz/ive_been_binging_for_almost_a_month_now/
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It's Monday tomorrow and I want to get back on track. I'm too scared to check the scale but last I checked, I've gained around 4 pounds of real weight.
Do you guys have any advice on how to break that binge cycle?
[Discussion] anybody have a microsoft band?
/u/tallgirlthrowaway13 [72.5" | 178 | 22.8 | 12 | F]
Created: Sun Aug 21 10:28:33 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yvnyp/anybody_have_a_microsoft_band/
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you can create challenges and make friends! i'd love to add anybody who has one :)
[Rant/Rave] tired of my weight fluxuation
/u/-teaqueen- [5'3" | 115 | 20.37 | -20 | F]
Created: Sun Aug 21 10:27:41 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yvnsv/tired_of_my_weight_fluxuation/
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I was 136, then 113, then back up to 126, now at 122. Why can't my weight just stay even??? preferably back at 113, of course... or less ;)
[Rant/Rave] How is this possible?!
/u/Skinniminnie [5'3" | 157.0 lbs | 27.6 BMI | -12 lbs | F]
Created: Sun Aug 21 10:13:43 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yvl9t/how_is_this_possible/
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I have felt so bloated and large but when I weighed myself last night I had lost a pound from the beginning of my period a four or five days ago.
How is that even remotely possible?! I've been eating like shit! Easily 2000+ yesterday after my binge. The other days no less than 1000 since I started this awful monthly reminder.
I guess I shouldnt be complaining about lost weight but it just doesn't feel right. I feel like I look bigger.
I need to lose as much weight in the next 11 days as possible. Im going to see my husband and his family and I can not be like this when I finally see them. We're attending a wedding while Im there and I get to meet some extended family. I need to leave a good impression and prove he didnt marry some ugly girl.
Im overreacting but I cant help but feel irrational when I know exactly what to do logically.
[Thinspo] Found this on Pinterest and loved it (before and afters)
/u/operadiva31 [5'6" | CW 212.4 lbs | 34.42 | -25.2 lbs | UGW 131 lbs]
Created: Sun Aug 21 10:04:22 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yvjml/found_this_on_pinterest_and_loved_it_before_and/
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http://www.trimmedandtoned.com/60-weight-loss-transformations-will-make-jaw-drop/
[Discussion] Daily Food Diary! August 21, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Sun Aug 21 10:02:24 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yvj9n/daily_food_diary_august_21_2016/
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This is a daily food diary thread for August 21, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
[Help] Exercising while restricting?
/u/tallgirlthrowaway13 [72.5" | 178 | 22.8 | 12 | F]
Created: Sun Aug 21 09:40:01 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yvfgc/exercising_while_restricting/
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before i had my flare-up, i was doing 4x a week boot camp workouts. i probably won't be able to go back to boot camp until october, but i was wondering if you guys had any suggestions for workouts to do until then? maybe something i could do while restricting (i've been at about 700 post-surgery, now i'm trying to stay around 800-1000 cals). tomorrow's my first day back at my desk job, so i'm going to walk on my lunch break as well as after work.
i am just feeling absolutely disgusting right now. i've been out for about a month now due to the pain and recovering and while i was still huge before, now i feel even worse about my body.
How long until the hunger passes?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Aug 21 09:39:10 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yvfb2/how_long_until_the_hunger_passes/
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[removed]
[Meme/Humor] Clueless breakfast
/u/FaithHopeTrick [5'7 | CW 123 GW 119 |19.20 | -32lbs | F]
Created: Sun Aug 21 09:13:59 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yvb1j/clueless_breakfast/
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https://imgur.com/a/lIQzP
[Rant/Rave] Family problems
/u/birdpeck [5'8" | 107 | 16.09 | F]
Created: Sun Aug 21 09:06:19 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yv9py/family_problems/
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My parents constantly joke about my eating habits even in public so they out me to everyone. Like yesterday someone at a baby shower commented about my height saying I looked taller and my dad immediately said "Oh she hasn't grown in years she's just losing weight" in front of everyone and I was mortified. At a dinner last month he said in front of everyone that I eat like a cat, that's why I'm so thin, prompting someone else to say "no, like a mouse" and now everyone knows about my eating habits and it's so frustrating and embarrassing
I'm also vegetarian and don't eat eggs so my mother will find some way to bring that up in conversation wherever we go. Or she'll go out of her way to loudly ask people if a dish has eggs or meat in it when I tell her I can take care of myself.
Anyone else's family like this?
[Help] Popcorn woes. Grams dont match up to recommend serving size? Halp
/u/Nude-prude [5"6.5 | 105 lbls | 16.68|-40| female]
Created: Sun Aug 21 08:53:14 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yv7km/popcorn_woes_grams_dont_match_up_to_recommend/
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So I love love love my popcorn. I use the lowest Cal microwave option , so I decided to buy a hot air popper (requires no oil) yay!!
The kernels I bought say the following.
"120 cals per 1/2 cup (50g)".
Awesome. Made fresh fluffy popcorn for less the cals and fat of the pre bagged / microwave.
The other day on a whim I decided to weigh the 1/2 cup. 117 grams?!?!? Wtf!!!!
I re checked it over and over. 50g of their kernels is no where near!! Half a cup. So I made 50g of it and it's no where near again the amount of popcorn I'd get from the microwave version.
Do I trust the 1/2 cup? Or the 50g? Ever had this happen? It's a no name brand.
Plz send halp
[Help] How fast can I lose?
/u/throwawaynm88 [Height 5'3.5"| CW 114.6 lbs| BMI 20| SW 125 lbs| GW 100 lbs]
Created: Sun Aug 21 08:35:55 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yv4sd/how_fast_can_i_lose/
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[removed]
[Help] Help To Prevent Binges
/u/RainyDayDaydream
Created: Sun Aug 21 08:30:21 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yv3uk/help_to_prevent_binges/
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So, today I went to a chocolate festival. And naturally bought a lot of sweet treats. I'm currently trying to restrict, but now Im so paranoid of all the temptation that I have laying around. I want to be able to treat myself to something small from this stash every now and then- but I want to eat all of it NOW. Any tips or advice?
[Rant/Rave] I want to fast until I disappear.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Aug 21 08:22:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yv2mw/i_want_to_fast_until_i_disappear/
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[deleted]
[Discussion] Short hair?
/u/starry_daydreamer [4'11" | 99 lbs | 21.2 | F]
Created: Sun Aug 21 07:51:17 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yuxtl/short_hair/
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So I'm thinking of getting a pixie cut (my hair is currently up to the small of my back) but I'm so worried that my fat face will make it look terrible instead of cute and dainty - if I get a pixie cut, I want ALL of me to look like a pixie. Anyone else feel like this at all?
[Rant/Rave] My friend said he noticed my weight-loss
/u/lotuslotad [5'6 | 147.2lbs | 24.08 | -20.8lbs | F]
Created: Sun Aug 21 06:21:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yulp0/my_friend_said_he_noticed_my_weightloss/
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And I asked "oh right, what dya mean?" And he said "it's around your arms and shoulders." Yep, so my big fatass, stomach and thighs are still there, great.
I've got a long way to go. I don't even feel like I look different to my starting weight, though objectively I've lost a stone and a half, I *should* look different. But all I see are my wide hips and fat bum and thick thighs spilling out and they haven't changed a bit.
[Discussion] Question for people with BED
/u/AmAlreadyGoingToHell
Created: Sun Aug 21 06:10:22 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yuka6/question_for_people_with_bed/
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I'm just super curious, what would your ultimate goal body look like? Is it as "sickly" thin as a lot of the thinspo we see here (BMI very underweight etc) or is it a more "normal" body? (BMI 19-25)
I couldn't sleep last night when this popped up in my head. Just really curious :)
[Other] Anyone miss LiveJournal?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Aug 21 05:06:53 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yud3h/anyone_miss_livejournal/
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[deleted]
[Discussion] ProED peeps, is there a certain person that feuls your ED?
/u/High_as_red [5'3 | F]
Created: Sun Aug 21 02:44:19 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4ytxvg/proed_peeps_is_there_a_certain_person_that_feuls/
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I know this girl, so perfect. But that effortless perfect. Unaware of it. I have to be around her all day and I swear.. makes things so much worse.
[Goal] Friend just asked if I had an eating disorder.
/u/MarquessOfCats [5'2 | Fat AF | F]
Created: Sun Aug 21 01:47:51 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4ytrp5/friend_just_asked_if_i_had_an_eating_disorder/
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"You basically never eat and you've lost a ton of weight! I mean, do you have an ED or something?"
It was said casually/half-seriously, and I just diverted the conversation, but admittedly I'm kind of happy my weight loss has been noticed.
Admittedly, I don't exactly hide it- I won't outright state I'm trying to lose weight, and I won't talk about how many calories I eat, but I don't generally hide disordered food choices. If I'm just going to eat some dry salad or a protein shake for a meal, I'm not going to pretend I'm having a huge meal. It's not like there's anything anyone can do about it at this point.
It's probably something that I shouldn't be happy about, but I kinda am.
[Rant/Rave] Frustrated.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Aug 20 22:20:48 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yt3km/frustrated/
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[deleted]
[Help] what's happening?
/u/AbandonEarth
Created: Sat Aug 20 22:05:25 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yt1kr/whats_happening/
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I'm dumb.
I have been restricting quite heavily the past ~3.5 days with my only intake being gum, tea, and a, quite substantial, taco bowl estimated at 500kcal. Furthermore, I went running yesterday and today and also played some volleyball casually. Tonight I started to get really shaky and weak. After realizing I wasn't getting any electrolytes, I made some broth and ate some nuts. Everything was great for approximately 30 minutes when I felt sick and vomited it all. Right now I'm feeling quite weak and shaky, but trying to, unfortunately, eat.
This is the first time anything like this has happened and I normally can go longer without any problems and sadly binge afterwards (that said I usually don't exercise at the same time).
Anyway, I just wanted to know if this if I was just putting too much volume into my stomach after fasting (probably had 2.5 cups of broth?), reintroducing food too quickly, or something more serious like refeeding syndrome?
Has anyone experienced something like this before?
I don't know if it's any help and I currently don't have a scale available, but if I were to guess my bmi is realistically in the mid-to-low 17s, even if it doesn't look/feel that way.
**EDIT: All quite on the disordered front. Feeling better now.**
[Rant/Rave] Fuck.
/u/salamanderqueen [5'9"| CW: 159.4 | SW: 180 | GW: 120 | -20.6 | 19F]
Created: Sat Aug 20 21:14:37 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4ysujo/fuck/
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Today was an unplanned binge day. Was at a carnival of sorts and just went whole hog (lol). Ate over 1,000 calories on top of my lunch AND dessert after lunch. So I figure, whatever, I'll assess the damage when I get home. I get home, and my scale is broken! And I can't afford to buy a new one until friday, when I get paid. I was supposed to be good this weekend because I start classes on monday and I wanted to start off on a good note :(
Whatever. I'm starting a 36 hour fast to make up for today.
[Other] Farewell lovelies!
/u/pretentiousintrovert [5'6 | 159# | FML | -12#]
Created: Sat Aug 20 19:41:24 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4ysgmd/farewell_lovelies/
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I've decided to give intuitive eating and weight training another try. Best of luck to all, and thanks for everything <3
[Rant/Rave] I have to go to a stupid BBQ tomorrow.
/u/PBhatesme [5'4"| 144 | 24.7 | -52| F]
Created: Sat Aug 20 19:37:10 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4ysfxw/i_have_to_go_to_a_stupid_bbq_tomorrow/
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Husband's family is having a BBQ that I have to go to. I so don't want to to to.
I've been doing the keto thing mostly for last 8 months of so. It's so awesome. Easy to lose weight because you can't really eat anything. Lol. But, that being said, there will probably be very little I can eat. Husband is used to me going places and not being able to eat stuff. And since he does actually see me eat occasionally is, thankfully, not super freaked out about it. My in-laws, not so much. They have been all the fuck over me for the last six or seven years when my weight loss started (minus husband the whole family is, like, super morbidly obese).
They can't fathom the fact that I might not eat for the four or so hours the party will be. Ugh. It'll all be fine. I've been through it before. I'm just so not looking forward to it.
Here's to hoping there's at least some super boring salad I can stick on my plate and pick at.
[Rant/Rave] Not lovable enough?
/u/BluestNovember [5'4" | SW: 200+ lbs | CW: too high | BMI: over 30 | -20lbs | F]
Created: Sat Aug 20 19:25:00 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yse1f/not_lovable_enough/
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I'm studying pretty intensely for an insurance license, and it's eaten up all my spare time in the last 2 months. I've had to push away friends to study, and it just reminds me that I'm not lovable or wanted, just like how so many of my family hate me for not being an unreasonable person in my politics. It's fueling me to hate myself more and more. I don't know why I hate myself as much as I do, sometimes. But it feels like everybody else hates me, too, sometimes.
[Intro] well, here goes.
/u/tallgirlthrowaway13 [72.5" | 178 | 22.8 | 12 | F]
Created: Sat Aug 20 18:58:19 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4ys9w2/well_here_goes/
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hi all. posting on a throwaway, but i've been lurking here for several weeks and i guess it's time i finally introduce myself. i've struggled with some pretty self-destructive habits for as long as i can remember. i've found myself returning to a lot of my disordered habits (i'm uncomfortable saying i have an ED, it's more of a BDD-esque mindset than anything) since my endometriosis diagnosis. not being able to work out because of pain and surgery has forced me back into restricting, and i feel this absolute urgency to lose weight. before i was sick i got down to 167, but i have never been down to where i think i'd feel comfortable (145 or lower) since i was 5'10".
anyway, hi. i'm here. you're all wonderful and i dunno. it's nice to not feel so alone.
[Discussion] Receiving compliments
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Aug 20 18:51:35 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4ys8u7/receiving_compliments/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] Water weight scare
/u/Lunar_Heart [61.75 in | 84 lbs | 16.08 | -23 | f]
Created: Sat Aug 20 17:31:53 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yrw5e/water_weight_scare/
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So... a few days ago, after noticing I looked a little bigger around the middle, I weighed myself and much to my dismay, I was six pounds heavier. Six pounds. I knew I hadn't weighed myself in almost three weeks but shit, *six* pounds. So I promptly had a mental breakdown on the bathroom floor and wallowed in self hatred for two days.
Today, I weighed myself, and I'm back down those whole six pounds, and my waist is restored to it's usual nearly-concave 22".
I feel incredibly stupid now. I sobbed to my boyfriend, was rude and aggressive to my family for no reason other than I was pissed at myself, and hurt myself for the first time in months because of *water weight*.
I hate my life.
[Other] Exersice bulimia
/u/slimbakerbitch [5'8.5" | 137 | 20.23 | F24]
Created: Sat Aug 20 17:25:50 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yrv66/exersice_bulimia/
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I've finally figured out what's wrong with me. 20,000-30,000 steps a day is a must for me. Feeling like I'm not allowed to eat unless I get a certain amount of calories burned. Guys, I have exercise bulimia. I knew I wasn't anorexic or bulimic although I have tendencies towards both habits. This is my issue. Today I'm supposed to be having a rest day, but my fitbit keeps yelling at me and I know I'm gonna go to the gym after I post this so I can eat dinner tonight. Realistically I know I should get rid of my fitbit since it's what has sparked this whole thing, but I know I won't because I just love it so much!
Edit: Realizing I spelled the title wrong. I promise I know how to spell exercise. Haha.
[Intro] I just want to find a happy weight
/u/insigniania [5'7 | CW: 116 | 18.1 | F |]
Created: Sat Aug 20 17:08:28 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yrs5h/i_just_want_to_find_a_happy_weight/
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Hello, I'm new here.
26 female grad student here. 5'7, CW: 116 lbs, LW:107, HW: 127, GW: ???
I have been obsessed with food and my weight for as long as I can remember, with periods of happy "recovery" breaks when food didn't take up the biggest part of my brain. I'm coming out of a recent break. I thought I was done. I hadn't weighed myself in 2 years as scales are triggering for me. I haven't counted calories. I had accepted that I'm always going to have jiggly thighs and a butt no matter my weight. I feel like I'm too old for this, but grad school stress and one comment from a friend has brought me back, so here I am.
I was always an underweight kid, an underweight teen, and a fluctuating from underweight to low "healthy" weight adult (107 -(bad breakup) to 127 (gained as a college athlete with help of trainer during a recovery period)). I think I convinced myself I was naturally thin, but in reality I think I'm just naturally disordered. I find comfort in hunger, even when I'm not counting calories or weighing myself. I also binge a lot, which triggers more restriction. I only know being thin, people thinking of me as thin, and the thought of ever not being thin terrifies me.
I recently realized how bad it was when a male friend saw me in a bikini and said in front of our friends "wow, Insigniania has gained weight!" Everyone laughed, I laughed it off, but I did not know if he was kidding and I felt huge and in my head I just knew I was over 130 lbs (higher than I've ever weighed before). Now I know 130 isn't fat for my height, but for some reason this is the arbitrary "bad" weight threshold for me that I'm scared to reach. I found a scale as soon as possible and weighed in at 116 and confirmed it on another scale. Since then my food obsessions are back full throttle, and I've realized how severe my BDD is (I can't tell the difference between 116 and 130!)
I want to be done with this. I just want to find a weight I feel comfortable at and maintain. But logically I know there is no weight I would like. I don't want be under 110 (I feel like I get too many comments and too much concern at that weight), but I don't want to be 120 either, because I don't feel thin enough at that weight. But I'm not happy at 116 because my thighs still seem huge and I just feel big. And if I go to 112-13 I just want to get to 110 because of stupid nonlogical ED brain. Arghh. So I guess I'm shooting for 114 this time around? But how can 2lbs make a difference? Ugghhh. I'm a scientist. I don't even know how I let myself think like this.
Anyway, sorry for that long rambling intro and rant. I'm going to try to do this healthy this time, not restrict too low, and make sure I get my nutrients in. I'm vegan too (10 years), so hey to all the veggies here. Maybe I'll find a happy weight so I can get on with life.
[Help] UGH! Having trouble restricting! Any tips?
/u/moonraven6661 [5'5|CW291lb|BMI48|UGW108lb|F]
Created: Sat Aug 20 16:27:05 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yrkxh/ugh_having_trouble_restricting_any_tips/
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[removed]
[Other] Passing out and throwing up
/u/at_select_stores_46 [5'2" | 129 lbs| -16 lbs | F]
Created: Sat Aug 20 15:55:47 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yrfdw/passing_out_and_throwing_up/
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Sorry mods, I don't know how to do flairs on my phone.
I passed out at ballet class this morning (or fainted, I don't know which one is more accurate). The instructor asked me what I had for breakfast, I told her I ate a packet of glucose. They forced me to eat some candy/granola bar a and drink some water. Everyone was watching me the rest the day so I had to force myself to eat to look like I was taking care of myself.
Just now I went to a restaurant and was feeling super hungry and I binged on a huge salmon burger. This woman next to me remarked how amazed she was that such a small and tiny person he eat such a large burger. That really triggered me. I promptly Went to the bathroom and threw it all up lol.
It's not a big deal, however it wasn't a cheap burger. But I just needed to tell someone since I can't tell my friends or my husband.
[Goal] "You look like you're getting skinnier." !!!!!!!!
/u/wearebulletproof [5'4 | fat | 20F🎀✨]
Created: Sat Aug 20 15:14:34 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yr85q/you_look_like_youre_getting_skinnier/
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My boss and my coworker at my weekend job said this to me today and I'm like AAAAAAAHHHHHH
And my coworker said that even last weekend, she thought I looked skinnier. It's weird because I don't see a difference at all, even though I've lost about 10 pounds so far but omg I'm ecstatic. It made me feel so much better despite the shitty summer I've had.
[Rant/Rave] Holy mother of emotional binges.
/u/goddamnroommate [5'6" | 143.1 | 23.17 | -50ish | F]
Created: Sat Aug 20 15:11:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yr7nl/holy_mother_of_emotional_binges/
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So for a while i thought i could game my ED. I thought that if i tried for 1000 calories, id end up around 1400 with good macros. This is my end goal. To maintain/lose at a slow rate. I would love to. Because i knew there would be a jump, i hadnt weighed myself in a week and a half. Weighed myself this morning and i was at 147.1, up three pounds from the week and a half before. Logically, i had my period this past week (iud so idk when it is 'over'; i dont get a period). I also havent had a BM in like 4 or 5 days, so i know my weight is not my weight. But that didnt stop me from crying in the bathroom or eating two handfuls of almonds and then going to work (at an *ice cream store*) and eating reeses, oreos, twix, kit kats, ice cream and cookies. Im here for another 6.5 hrs and im sure im already around 2500 calories. This is the worst.
But ive got a plan. Nothing is required of me tomorrow so ill go work out a bit, EC stack and have fewer than 100 calories. Then on monday i will be a slug at home and do nothing and eat nothing and organize everything. Then ill up my calories to 800 on tuesday.
But holy crap. Ugh.
[Rant/Rave] School is making it too hard to restrict.
/u/TiredOfBeingFat_
Created: Sat Aug 20 14:50:20 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yr3t5/school_is_making_it_too_hard_to_restrict/
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[removed]
[Other] Took my first EC stack
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Aug 20 14:12:18 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yqx8k/took_my_first_ec_stack/
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[deleted]
[Intro] hello! guess i'd better introduce myself
/u/deadroyal [5'1" | 95.4lbs | 18.83 | -5lbs | F]
Created: Sat Aug 20 13:52:29 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yqtt4/hello_guess_id_better_introduce_myself/
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hey everyone. i've been a long time lurker but have finally decided to visit for realsies, and i wanted to make an intro post
i'm bella if you want a name, but my username or royal works just as well (: i'm 19f, currently in sort of a forced gap year before uni because of family stuff, and i'm a relatively spiritual person who's looking to study history or theatre.
here's my story, in short: i was the skinny kid growing up, and then suddenly i wasn't. it was my determination to keep that title and to grasp femininity i felt i was losing, plus some exposure to relatively triggering media, that started my slippery slope to anorexia at age 13. for years i went between starving/restricting like mad... and then trying to make up for it by "recovering" on my own. it never really got anywhere, and my family wouldn't have reacted well if they knew
now, on top of all the other stress in my life, i know for a fact that i really can't combat this anymore. it's a horrible coping mechanism, but it's the only one i have. i figure if i'm going to suffer through this, i'm not going to do it alone. so it's nice to meet you all! xx
[Discussion] Just atarted supersize vs superskinny
/u/thelonelykitten_
Created: Sat Aug 20 13:35:14 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yqqkd/just_atarted_supersize_vs_superskinny/
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Just atarted supersize vs superskinny and all these skinny people are what I want to look like. But they're all eating 2-3x what I eat everyday. How!!! I'm so jealous
[Other] It's been a while since I've been here!
/u/mckenziemudkip [5'3 | CW:115(-15) GW:88 | BMI 20.93| F/20]
Created: Sat Aug 20 13:11:47 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yqmag/its_been_a_while_since_ive_been_here/
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Or at least it feels like ages.. lol probably more like 2 weeks at the max.
I told you guys how I had a week vacation in Cali. It was a lot of fun. And omg Coronado Beach is soooo pretty!
Anyway, so the first.. eh.. 3 days? I did pretty okay. Salads, but a good amount of starbucks. So probably only like, 200 cal under my TDEE those days. Then, I started getting so nervous that his friends could tell that I was messed up, or weird with food. Or most likely that I was just a prissy, picky eater (my SOs friends are a couple that we stayed with/hung out with the whole time. And they both are bigger and super foodies) I didn't want them to not like me so I ate pretty much whenever they did. And I know that part sounds dumb because I shouldn't care that much what they think, but I did because they're really important to my boyfriend.
I didn't binge or eat where I was uncomfortable, and I still made decent food choices (besides, again, all the starbucks) and plus one trip to In-n-Out cause I never had it. And sorry all you Cali people that love it but I wasn't even impressed and not worth the calories eating it lmao
But to sum it up, I think I gained weight and I'm hella scared to get on the scale. And being on my period and bloated... ugh.
I've been home for a week and just today I had the guts to get on here and finally see all you guys' lovely pictures, and thinspo and such, without being afraid of feeling like total and utter shit.
I know I've been good and back on track the last week, but I still think I'm making a promise to myself not to step on the scale until September 1st. I will be nowhere near 100 lbs like my goal was. I will not be happy with the number. But I'm sure it will be better than what I'm at now, and I can't risk a freak out binge based on what the scale says..
Side note: Ballerina Senna tea tastes horrible (even with sweetener and cream) and does NOTHING for me. I read so many reviews like "make sure you have 10 hours of free time, cause you're not going to leave the toilet" - and that shit didn't even make my tummy rumble.
But anyway. Main point - glad to be back and talking to all you lovelies! (And sorry for the huge wall of text lol)
[Discussion] How your ED affects loved ones
/u/bloodketosexmagic
Created: Sat Aug 20 12:54:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yqj2o/how_your_ed_affects_loved_ones/
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I haven't really allowed anyone in my family to cook me food for roughly 1.5-2 years now. My dad and siblings know im bulimic, and about two weeks ago on a Saturday night i asked my dad if he could make me a single slice of toast. On Sunday night my sister asked him what his highlight of the weekend was, he said making me toast.
Is it acceptable to be welling up typing this? Oh God It hit me right in the feels guys.
(On mobile... feelsy rant, i guess?)
[Rant/Rave] Eating 1700+ calories a day is really scary.
/u/kpatable [5'9" | 125.1 | 18.1/18.5 | -21.9 | F]
Created: Sat Aug 20 10:42:47 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4ypwjr/eating_1700_calories_a_day_is_really_scary/
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I've gained a few pounds, and, while some of the weight might be food/water weight that is now just perpetual, I'm still paranoid that I'll gain on more than 1600. For the purpose of recovery, my goal right now is 1700 a day. I really, really, REALLY hope this doesn't cause me to gain long-term. I'm going to track my weight over the next few months as loosely as I can, and I'm really hoping I don't slowly start gaining again. Because then I'll have to lose it again. I just... I'm trying to eat when I'm hungry and stop when I'm satiated, and I just hope that doing this doesn't cause me to gain much more weight. It's just so nerve wracking that all I can do is wait. Fuck.
[Rant/Rave] sigh...
/u/bacongains [🐋🐷]
Created: Sat Aug 20 10:29:25 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4ypubw/sigh/
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SO went on an impromptu boy's trip/lost weekend in Miami. They managed to snag some good last minute rsvps considering how last minute this trip was...zuma brunch, la mar, alter tasting menu. Hearing about how these 6'2 220 bros are gorging themselves silly is tough even though I have the luxury of eating 900 cals a day. My one consolation was he promised to ransack the housekeeping cart for hermes toiletries but turns out this Mandarin only stocks Shanghai Tang so fuck that noise. The mere mention of a Publix sub or Jersey Mikes is enough to send me spiralling. Anyways sorry for my bullshit you guys, this is just me feeling sorry and mopey for myself and possibly some pms. I should be happy for him as food is his greatest joy in life and he gets to do bro shit but honestly I'm so sad and can't shake it. I will console myself with some tea and try to drown myself in world's hottest shower (I seem to have caught the late summer cold that's had many of us dropping like flies as of late :( )
[Discussion] Daily Food Diary! August 20, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Sat Aug 20 10:02:24 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yppn8/daily_food_diary_august_20_2016/
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This is a daily food diary thread for August 20, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
[Discussion] Gym hints & tips?
/u/driftinglochawe [182cm | CW 85kg | GW 65kg | 24.4 | -2 | F]
Created: Sat Aug 20 09:36:37 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yplck/gym_hints_tips/
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Flair as Discussion please :)
So I'm at my new gym - there's fast WIFI woo! But I'm wondering if anyone has any tips on how to get the most out of the gym like machines to use and ones to avoid? Thank you :)
Edit: As [Woollyshirt](https://reddit.com/user/woollyshirt) pointed out I should mention my goal - I'd like to work up to burning 500 calories during a gym session.
[Help] Moving home... at 22...
/u/mindgamesbodygames [5'4'' | going down]
Created: Sat Aug 20 09:01:51 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4ypfdi/moving_home_at_22/
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So I've been living on campus finishing up the last few courses of my degree this summer. I have a job lined up for September that is predominately travel, but my home-town will be home base. I decided I wanted to pay off my student debt in 12 months because I want to go to grad school debt free, so my mother suggested I "live" at home when I'm in town to save money on rent.
At the time it sounded like a great idea, so I said yes. But in the months since we made these plans I've relapsed after years of recovery and am now freaking out. Living alone I don't have to hide at all. I wake up, browse reddit, go to the gym for a few hours, come home and eat something small, and then hit the books until I do some other sort of workout, and then get back to studying. There's not much food worked into that and they will be sure to notice. Also I'll be so much further away from the gym, which is giving me major anxiety.
Has anyone moved home as an adult? I'm so anxious about losing my autonomy and hiding my behaviours that it's making my behaviours worse. Oh god, the irony.
[Rant/Rave] Motivation: "95% of people who lose weight put it all back on again! And more!"
/u/smokesanddietcokes [<3 ]
Created: Sat Aug 20 08:35:05 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4ypazl/motivation_95_of_people_who_lose_weight_put_it/
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Sigh. A certain group of "friends" of mine, of the fat acceptance persuasion, LOVE reminding me of this because of my weight loss. They've made it clear that they see me losing weight as a kind of betrayal, I guess. I should have stayed fat and 'happy' about it (like they totally are! Right..?).
I don't talk about my weight loss with this group of "friends" because I know their thoughts, but obviously.. they can tell that I've kinda, you know, lost over 100lbs. I can't hide it. And so it doesn't seem to matter that I don't talk about it.. they love reminding me of things like the above anyway.
Whether it's true or not, I don't know. I see a lot of evidence that it's not, but it doesn't matter.. I wont risk it.
Whenever they bring it up - or whenever I see it floating around online, tbh - it just motivates me way more to resist temptation. To restrict. To fast. Many times I've turned an eating day into a fast day because one of them has said this to me, or something else along the fat-acceptance, resistance-to-fat-is-futile lines.. or if I see it online somewhere.
I wont be one of those 95%. I will do anything to not be one of those 95%. I can't regain the weight if I *just don't eat*.
I was going to eat well today. Not over, but well. Moderately. Healthy meals all planned out. Then "friends" popped up in a thread I posted, finding a reason to worm in the 95% statistic at me again, about me (the post wasn't even to do with weight loss btw.. it was about fashion..).
I can't fast totally, my SO is coming over, but I'll be striving to keep it to under 800kcal.
Thanks "friends".
[Discussion] Does other aspects of appearance matter to you?
/u/yummmies [5'4" | 130 | -35 | F]
Created: Sat Aug 20 08:26:44 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yp9pv/does_other_aspects_of_appearance_matter_to_you/
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Thing like outfits, makeup, skin, etc. I was going through the OOTD thread, and thinking that most of you are dressed nicely and how my current outfit makes me look as though I've never even seen a VS store. I'm just wondering if you valued your overall appearance more or just the number on the scale.
I definitely care more about my weight than anything else. I can look like an unkept mess, but as long as my weight is low (or rather that I'm still losing weight bc I'm a little piggy rn), none of it matters. What about you guys?
[Discussion] ED tattoo inspiration
/u/Jackysuave [5'4" | 136 | 23.34 | F]
Created: Sat Aug 20 08:20:33 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yp8sj/ed_tattoo_inspiration/
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I've been struggling with my ED for quite some time now and it's shaped who I am and what I've become. I think it's pretty bizarre how much it controls me.
I've also been thinking about getting a tattoo for a long time but wasn't sure what I wanted for my first one. Recently a favorite band of mine wrote a song about Anorexia and I cried hearing it the first time. I even spoke to the vocalist of my struggles and he prayed for me. Though my depression and eating disorder have corrupted my being, this band is helping me through lots in such a short amount of time.
I'm definitely stuck on how to depict anorexia through a tattoo. I was thinking on having two women on each thigh as a portrait, mostly because I hate my thighs the most and was the trigger for me to lose weight in the first place.
One thigh will have a beautiful woman, with tattoos and piercings surrounded by birds, flowers, very life-like. It'll say "gifted with the vision" underneath that. On the other thigh it'll be the wrecked version of that woman because of an eating disorder and it'll say underneath that "cursed to be the witness"
What do you think metaphorically and literally signifies an eating disorder?
[Discussion] What are the best movies, TV shows, books, and songs about ED?
/u/DivingRightIn [72in | don't ask | don't tell | ~57.2lbs | UGW: 115lbs | F]
Created: Sat Aug 20 07:36:07 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yp28h/what_are_the_best_movies_tv_shows_books_and_songs/
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I'm back after a short break from the madness!
I know this question gets asked pretty much every single week :-( but I'm back in college and ready to "Dive Right In" again.
I'm basically compiling a list of stuff to do when I'm not studying, homeworking, or in class to distract myself in my dorm room, because boo its's boring as fudge in here.
I currently have Wintergirls, Brain Over Binge, and Wasted in the book section (also Game of Thrones and The Hobbit/Lord of the Rings).
Thanks all!
[Rant/Rave] I love you guys so much
/u/TeaCupGirl [5'8" | CW 124.8lbs | 19 | -15.2lbs |]
Created: Sat Aug 20 06:56:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yowoe/i_love_you_guys_so_much/
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You guys are the only reason I don't feel completely alone in this fucked up cycle I'm in. I feel like I'm part of a family when I post here. Thanks to every one of you. <3
[Rant/Rave] I cried today because my cough medicine didn't indicate calories...[RANT]
/u/High_as_red [5'3 | F]
Created: Sat Aug 20 01:51:51 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4ynxpu/i_cried_today_because_my_cough_medicine_didnt/
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So i didn't anything else the whole day. And I feel like I might just stop eating for a week because it will haunt me.
[Other] I hate that other people don't wonder if I have an ED.
/u/bougainvilleas [5'5.5" | 101 | 16.6 | -11 | F]
Created: Sat Aug 20 01:12:06 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4ynt5c/i_hate_that_other_people_dont_wonder_if_i_have_an/
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BMI of 16.4 right now. Idk my bf% but it must be pretty high, because some people with 17-20 BMIs look much thinner (it's not just dysmorphia--I've literally stood next to heavier friends in mirrors before and noticed my bigger thighs, flabbier upper arms, etc). Maybe I don't have muscle at all? Maybe my body just carries weight super unattractively?
Sometimes I catch my reflection and feel okay, but most times I see it and feel so disappointed. Like, wow I've spent the past 10 months of my life caught up in a secret mental illness and don't even have anything to show for it -- I spend anywhere from an hour to half the entire day of every day obsessing about food and weight goals, but then I make shitty decisions to binge and in the end I'm still so far from my GW and full of resentment on top of it.
I might look skinny right now, but it's in the "healthy, naturally skinny" way with a lot of fat still and not the statuesque, disciplined, all-straight-lines, someone-people-are-jealous-of way.
I want to be bony enough to make people around me suspect I actually have an ED. I'm ready to be that girl who politely refuses food and also _looks_ like she doesn't ever eat (instead of refusing it, then overeating in private two days later, and still looking a "normal, healthy" weight). From here on I'm going to do this right and actually have it all pay off.
I realize all this is totally messed up, but I'm really glad this sub exists, where hopefully there are others who understand <3
[Rant/Rave] My fiancé put me in food jail
/u/InSkyLimitEra [5' 7.25" | HW 180 | CW 117 | LW 114.6 | 29 F]
Created: Fri Aug 19 22:49:19 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4ynbxx/my_fiancé_put_me_in_food_jail/
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My fiancé is driving me absolutely nuts.
I have so much anxiety about food and having control over my body and my life, but because I've developed an eating disorder, he decides he needs to monitor my intake so I'm getting at least 1200 cal every single day (fucking kill me). And he also wants to take my scale from me.
I know he's concerned, but his "concern" is manifesting as fury because he considers my not having told him I was restricting to 400 cal/day "lying." When he asked about it, I told the truth, but yeah, I guess I'm a huge liar now too. Let's add that to the list of reasons I'm horrible and should starve to death.
And here's the kicker: he says if he ever finds out I've returned to restricting without telling him, he's going to leave me. So much for that "in sickness and in health" clause he's supposedly going to agree to. He puts SO much focus on how my not telling him about my restriction is a betrayal and that I have a lot of regaining his trust to do. Not on the mechanism of the disease that made me feel like I had no option but to hide it in the first place.
No matter how much I try to explain anorexia to him, he cannot get the underlying mindset into his head. He seems to think that if I get into the habit of just eating 1200 cal/day while seeking counseling at school that everything will fix itself. It's so fucking ignorant, and the fury and the removal of my autonomy is only setting me up for a *massive* relapse (if I ever even get "better" in the first place). It's so counterproductive to trade temporary physical health for my mental health, the root cause of this illness.
Thanks for letting me vent. I just have no idea what to do anymore. I'm so frustrated, so alone, so anxious, so depressed. So trapped.
[Rant/Rave] Feeling anxious talking to friend about food
/u/Superderg
Created: Fri Aug 19 22:36:16 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yna7l/feeling_anxious_talking_to_friend_about_food/
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I went for dinner with a friend of mine tonight. He knows I've been working to lose weight and he's trying to bulk up. We often talk diet and health plans. So he asked how I've been doing (down 9.5lbs in 3.5 weeks). He also knows I have an ed. He just said all the wrong things and it killed me. He was like how much total weight have you lost, I said 9.5lbs, he said oh I thought that was just this month. Haven't you been trying longer than that? Then discussing food and how much I want to lose after dinner. We had Indian but I only ate around 500 calories. And it's all I ate today. I just got so overwhelmed and wanted to cry. I felt so guilty for eating that much even though I knew it was really good. I'm just bummed out by it.
Can't flair on mobile, please flair rant
[Rant/Rave] I need to focus
/u/Jackysuave [5'4" | 136 | 23.34 | F]
Created: Fri Aug 19 21:53:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yn4gx/i_need_to_focus/
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[removed]
[Rant/Rave] Tomorrow is another day. I won't give up because of a bad month. It's time to turn around now and get back to my goal.
/u/stargatesg-7 [5"2 | 112 | -27 | GW 100]
Created: Fri Aug 19 20:41:51 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4ymu2u/tomorrow_is_another_day_i_wont_give_up_because_of/
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Today I messed up. Yesterday I messed up. This month I've messed up. 27 pounds down, and then 6 back up. Instead of eating at the end of the day because, oh well I've messed up this bad already might as well eat some more... I am going to give it my all tomorrow. I'm not going to worry about yesterday. I'm going to begin anew. I won't let my mistakes in the past let me give up on my goals. I've gotten this far. I'm going to pick myself up, and run to my goal. I've done it before, I lost almost 30 pounds. It is possible. Instead of sitting in self loathing and pinching my stomach and taking note of the weight that has come back... I am going to start again. Not from the beginning, I am not back where I was. If I wait, I will be. So I will start tomorrow, and save myself the guilt of gaining all that weight back. I'll make it to my goal weight. Thanks ProEd.
Edit: You are all the best! So glad we have a place to encourage each other. You can all do this! There is no better day to start than today! I'm doing well so far today. Went to the farmer's market with my parents and just had an iced coffee with no milk or sugar while my parents had big cheesy breakfast biscuits. I only had a small small sample of baked veggies :)
I also set two reminders on my phone everyday( it re,ones me to watch what I eat and lists my goal weight. It's helped so far!!!
[Rant/Rave] Restricting and booze
/u/PBhatesme [5'4"| 144 | 24.7 | -52| F]
Created: Fri Aug 19 20:27:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4ymrws/restricting_and_booze/
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I think someone touched on it earlier in the week, but it really is super nice when I can be basically drunk on 2.5 glasses of wine and a double shot of vodka.
Even counting in the food I ate today, it only totals to 1000 calories. And I spent two hours on the treadmill this morning.
I've spent the last two hours watching NPH on YouTube. I'm really really enjoying my Friday. Hope you loves are too!
[Intro] I've been lurking for a while, so I thought I'd say hi
/u/Yet_Living [5'7 | SW 66kg CW 61kg GW 50ish| 20.14 | M ]
Created: Fri Aug 19 18:51:38 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4ymdhs/ive_been_lurking_for_a_while_so_i_thought_id_say/
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Hello :)
I've been lurking around this sub for a few weeks now and haven't posted or commented yet (very shy). I'd type out a comment but not post it. You all seem very nice here and I have always wanted to join in. So, here I am :)
I definitely identity with a lot of the stuff that is posted here and feel horribly guilty after eating (I've cried). And I've have never been comfortable with how I looked. Acne, pigeon feet, but the big one has always been my weight. I've always wanted to be thin. As far back as I can remember. And that still applies. I've lost a lot of weight from restricting in the past few months, but I'm not thin like you guys are, but hopefully I'll be soon. So, once again, hello :)
[Other] This worked so anti-binge for me
/u/AmAlreadyGoingToHell
Created: Fri Aug 19 14:51:35 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yl7na/this_worked_so_antibinge_for_me/
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https://youtu.be/QmnIyyv5-GY
[Other] Thank god for 50 cal hot dogs.
/u/thelonelykitten_
Created: Fri Aug 19 13:47:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4ykvgr/thank_god_for_50_cal_hot_dogs/
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I was convinced to go out to lunch today with friends so I used up all my calories for the day with 55 left over. I was freaking out cause I didn't know what I was going to do tonight for food with my bf. BUT I remembered I bought hot dogs that are only 50 cal. Let's just hope I don't get drunk and ruin it(alcohol calories don't count right...I wish)
[Tip] I shaped my nails into points to stop myself from purging
/u/pcrnography [5'6" | -55 lbs | nb]
Created: Fri Aug 19 13:32:50 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yksq0/i_shaped_my_nails_into_points_to_stop_myself_from/
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Good part: they look cool
Bad part: it worked and I can't purge without stabbing myself in the throat
(on mobile, can't flair :( )
[Rant/Rave] FUCK MICE
/u/capture_the_excite [164cm | 55kg | 20.4 | F]
Created: Fri Aug 19 12:40:36 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4ykipo/fuck_mice/
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A mouse got into my food!!
I had everything planned out, I was going to have a protein shake for lunch and zoodles for dinner. When I came in to work and pulled the protein powder from under my desk, the bag had been chewed open and there was powder all over the carpet. I am seriously freaking out. I'm not buying any more because I know it'll just come back and chew through that bag as well.
God this has dirsupted my eating plan for the entire day. I am beyond livid, what an asshole.
when you binged but you're trying not to purge anymore
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Aug 19 12:39:47 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4ykiju/when_you_binged_but_youre_trying_not_to_purge/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/a86014e09b7f4dc1a4bd2c95753a8537?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=e7927580895f8ada4d5707b7974b705c
[Discussion] Does anyone use a CLA supplement?
/u/peapod-romantic [5'1 | 170 | 32.1 | -21 | F]
Created: Fri Aug 19 11:24:30 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yk5up/does_anyone_use_a_cla_supplement/
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I've been talking to my cousin's wife who is very fit and she said her biggest help was using a CLA supplement. She takes one before each meal and she said it made a difference for her.
I'm just wondering if anyone has had success with this? [Looking it up online](http://www.webmd.com/vitamins-supplements/ingredientmono-826-conjugated%20linoleic%20acid.aspx?activeingredientid=826), it appears to be a natural supplement to aid fat loss. Other articles that I found online also appears to support the idea that CLA can aid weightloss with a sustainable caloric deficit.
Does anyone have any experience with it?
[Intro] Trying to be careful not to switch one ED form for another "bad" habit.
/u/peapod-romantic [5'1 | 170 | 32.1 | -21 | F]
Created: Fri Aug 19 10:52:34 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yk03c/trying_to_be_careful_not_to_switch_one_ed_form/
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Hi, first post, so I apologize if I screw up some how. I don't *think* I am, but I usually find a way, so I'm sorry in advance if I do. I've been lurking but haven't had the courage to post until now, I just decided to say "screw it" and join in the conversation. Tbh it seems to be common, but I really felt/feel that I can't post because I'm fat and my ED led to more weight gain than loss in the long run.
I have been working hard to stop bingeing. Even though I have still had some weird mini-binges, lately I've been able to prevent myself from astronomically high calorie binges by absolutely refusing junk food. It feels awesome. I am really focusing on the idea of "your body is a temple" and it's helping me to avoid some of the things that used to be my weakness like chips, soda, cakes, etc. While I'm not going to lie, I've still had my issues, choosing low calorie binge foods has made my binges go from consuming several thousand calories (gross, :( I know) I'm only eating maybe 1500-2000 calories.
Anyways, I'm still wanting to lose weight obviously, so I've started restricting my calories a little, and finally weight has started coming off and I've actually managed to lose 20 lbs without a massive binge to erase my progress. This has sparked something in me because now I'm so inspired and feel eager and excited to stay on track and continue losing. Maybe I'm just paranoid but I feel like I'm almost becoming more obsessed. Do you think there are warning signs or things to watch for to keep myself in check? As if I need it now, I know. But I just don't want others to be in my business about weight loss, so maybe it would be helpful to know at what point should I check myself to ensure I'm still working with a semi-healthy plan and not getting too restrictive which could lead to binging again or even become a slippery slope with my history of weird habits? I don't want to ask my GP because I don't want her to know exactly what I'm doing or where my head is at or she'll push behavioral therapy again which I don't want to do right now.
Also, on another note. It's really confusing being fat but diagnosed with an ED because while I really like my GP, we have these strange conversations that confuse me about how I need to not focus on cutting calories but that I still need to lose weight because my BMI is not healthy. So she has encouraged me to instead focus on "nutritious" foods and getting exercise. I know she's trying to be delicate and help me become healthy, but no matter what she says, I hear "you're too fat and bingeing has to stop because that's why you're too fat". It's just really confusing and I know I should see my therapist again, but I just feel like at my age I want to figure this out on my own and not have people taking my control away or telling what to do.
Sorry for the long rant. I didn't initally expect to say all of that but as I started typing things just came out. Anyway, very nice to finally "meet" you all.
[Discussion] What foods/things/supplements help you with your digestion and bowel movements?
/u/stelldichein
Created: Fri Aug 19 10:45:34 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yjypv/what_foodsthingssupplements_help_you_with_your/
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I'd say I'm pretty informed about everything that has to do with digestion and other related things (like bowel movements, feeling bloated, etc.) but I'm still curious what YOU do and eat (or not eat) to keep everything moving, keep down the bloating and how often you have a bowel movement. I'm talking about specific foods that help (or hinder), supplements like probiotics, exercises or tummy massages, medical stuff - just everything that has anything to do with poop.
I know... it's a pretty weird topic to be interested in and for some it's a bit TMI - but I think it's an important topic that doesn't get discussed enough and maybe it'll help some of you out. I hate feeling bloated and not being able to have a bowel movement, so I'm always looking out for methods to make my life easier in that field.
So, let's talk about poop!
[Discussion] Daily Food Diary! August 19, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Fri Aug 19 10:02:33 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yjqd2/daily_food_diary_august_19_2016/
---
This is a daily food diary thread for August 19, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
[Tip] Instead of restricting and fasting right away...
/u/indiembers
Created: Fri Aug 19 09:02:38 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yjej8/instead_of_restricting_and_fasting_right_away/
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It's important to remember to go easy on yourself, especially if you are someone in this sub with bulimia or if you binge. If you at first cut down, then fast, your stomach will shrink.
So, say if you eat oatmeal and toast for breakfast, try to choose one or the other. Or, if you eat a sandwich and chips for lunch/dinner, only eat part of the sandwich and forget the chips.
It's easier to cut down until you can't eat as much as you used to.
Eat something like 800 calories a day for a few days, then 600 calories for a couple of days, and then 300, then 200, then as little as possible. After this you should be able to fast for a few days with out wanting to eat your entire fridge.
And remember, when you are building up calories after stopping your fast, it is so so so important that you drink juice or milk, then add something bland like oatmeal, then add nutrient rich fruits and vegetables, then everything else.
If your body is introduced to too many calories at once, no matter what the size of the meal, you will feel like shit. Same goes for fiber, if you eat too much of it in one sitting, you're going to feel really really full and it won't be pleasant on a small stomach.
Please take care of yourselves, I don't want to see anyone hurt ❤️ I'm not telling anyone to diet this way, but if you make the choice to fast, this is the easiest way to not hurt yourself.
EDIT: also, don't rush sugar because you'll feel like you're dying.
[Discussion] How do you guys deal with being sick (with a cold)
/u/HowToBeAsian25 [5'3.5 |115lbs |19.78 |-19 | F]
Created: Fri Aug 19 08:46:56 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yjbfj/how_do_you_guys_deal_with_being_sick_with_a_cold/
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Sore throat, body aches, congestion, phlegm.
I read a while ago that the best thing you can do when you're sick is to fast. Instead of having your body concentrate on digestion, it can focus on healing. With that being said, It's water, green tea, and possibly chicken broth for as long as I can stand it.
Is there anything you guys do to help a speedy recovery?
[Rant/Rave] More assorted rants
/u/negativeraisins [5'0" | 69 lb | 14.19 | -53 lb | FTM]
Created: Fri Aug 19 08:29:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yj84j/more_assorted_rants/
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Sorry for the multiple submissions in the short amount of period of time, it's just... Jesus fuck, there's a lot to rant about.
My family - and other random people, actually - keep feeling like they're entitled to touching my body because of ~ * ~ how thin i am ~ * ~. This was mostly a problem with random people in Korea - other students kept rubbing my arms and grabbing my shoulders, tour guide rubbing my arms, etc., but it's still continuing with family here. My aunt keeps rubbing my neck, my mother keeps randomly rubbing my ribs and backbone (sometimes when she thinks I'm asleep...), and I woke up this morning to my grandmother rubbing my ribs and vertebrae and face while she thought I was asleep. Just, holy fuck, can people *stop touching me*?! And I can't tell them to stop because it's considered fucking rude, brilliant.
Also, unrelated, but when I asked my grandmother if she had eaten breakfast she said "No, I'm waiting until later because I feel sick right now." Haha, wish I could do that without being yelled at for not eating three meals a day, especially since I feel nauseous as fuck right now. :^)
[Rant/Rave] Turning point
/u/driftinglochawe [182cm | CW 85kg | GW 65kg | 24.4 | -2 | F]
Created: Fri Aug 19 08:24:13 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yj734/turning_point/
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So last night I went along with a friend to a sports club that I'd hadn't been to in over 3 years with all my equipment only to find in the changing room none of it fitted me. I had to fib to people that a zip was broken when in reality I need to lose 10 kg+. I was so anxious about coming and seeing people I hadn't seen in years and this was so humiliating. I quietly sat on the sideline scrolling Reddit waiting for my friend to finish. He was keen to go for drinks and food with people after but it was the last thing I needed and we ended up heading home. I felt sorry for myself and felt like a bitch for not letting my friend go for drinks. To top off the evening I got home and my parents were asking if I enjoyed going back to a sport I hadn't done in years and I was honest with them that I couldn't fit into my uniform.
Another thing is living with family makes it so hard to restrict, particularly at the moment my Mum has been taking time off work and she makes large sit down lunches. Before I found I could restrict throughout the day and then sit down to a small portion of dinner with my family.
So after consideration it makes perfect sense to join a gym and that exercise could create a calorie deficit. Of course I've been saying that for months and having to cope through anxiety and depression but I finally reached a head and set up a monthly payment for a gym that's just opened in town. I feel a sense of relief that I can finally begin to claw back control on my body. I have my induction tomorrow and I can spend today putting upbeat gym appropriate music on my iPod in preparation :)
A rant and a rave!
[Meme/Humor] How I feel everytime I look at the scale
/u/shangen010 [Height:5' | CW:110/UGW:85 | BMI:22.6 | Weight Lost: -6| Gender:F]
Created: Fri Aug 19 08:13:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yj545/how_i_feel_everytime_i_look_at_the_scale/
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https://i.redd.it/me9mfe8ekcgx.png
[Rant/Rave] Binged this morning (and last night)
/u/ClashTenniShoes [6'M | 212 lb| 28.8 BMI | -11 lb | UGW 190]
Created: Fri Aug 19 08:10:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yj4kc/binged_this_morning_and_last_night/
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So, my wife wanted McDonald's last night (it's really annoying that she eats whatever, is 30 years old, had a baby and is 120 lbs and fit looking without really even trying, and honestly it's just because she never, ever binges. She always just eats till she is full, and that's that.)
Anyway, she said to go ahead and get two of the chicken mcnuggets boxes with 20, and we could just kind of have 8 each at night, each have 8 for lunch tomorrow (today) and have a few leftover as snacks. She also got a McDouble last night.
Anyway, so she only eats her McDouble and 4 McNuggets. I had my eight, and her four were just sitting there on a plate. I ate one, then another, then another, and then AWWW FUCK IT I ALREADY FUCKED UP... ate all 16 in one box.
Woke up this morning, weighed in, yup all that salt, I'm up 2 lbs, FUCK IT ALL! Ate all 20 of the remaining nuggets and wife is annoyed she doesn't have her eight for lunch.
[Rant/Rave] Fitbit
/u/NindeNehima [5'2" | 95.5 | 18.06 | F]
Created: Fri Aug 19 08:03:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yj35t/fitbit/
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This is a bit of a rant, sorry.
Guys, I love my fitbit. I've had it just a few weeks now, I broke down and bought it one day when I was too depressed to go to work or get out of bed. But I love it. I love seeing my "progress" minute by minute. I have it set for a calorie deficit and I'm only happy when I see I'm below budget on food. It really keeps me on track with eating. I know it's probably not entirely accurate with calories burned, but it does help visualize it.
And I'm down 6 lbs (though a few I think we're just bloating) in the last 2 weeks. I haven't felt this great in ages, even though the rest of my life is falling apart around me.
This is most probably making me worse, but I feel so good so I don't care. I'm finally seeing progress and have no one to stop me from slowly starving to death.
[Help] I don't have it in me anymore
/u/awkwardism
Created: Fri Aug 19 07:10:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yitsn/i_dont_have_it_in_me_anymore/
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Since moving to a different state I've gained about 20 pounds. I've been here for a year and haven't done anything about it really. I was already unhappy with my weight before the extra 20. I just can't restrict anymore. If I do it lasts like two days and then I binge or drink. I have no control. I think it's my depression and energy levels. I just don't know what to do anymore. I just can't stand feeling this way anymore. This is the heaviest and unhealthiest (physically and mentally) I've ever been. I guess I need a little love and some help or encouragement.
[Help] Weight question?
/u/wearebulletproof [5'4 | fat | 20F🎀✨]
Created: Fri Aug 19 06:37:31 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yio49/weight_question/
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On mobile, flair as help I guess???
But my weight has been odd lately. If I fast or only eat ~500 calories, I always lose 1 or 2 pounds. But as soon as I eat anything more than I normally do, even if it's only 800 cals, I gain those 1 or 2 pounds back. But that's not possible is it? So why is it doing that?
☹️
[Discussion] Weekly Selfie, Progress Pic and OOTD Thread! August 19, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Fri Aug 19 06:03:25 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yiisi/weekly_selfie_progress_pic_and_ootd_thread_august/
---
This is the weekly picture thread for August 19, 2016.
Feel free to share your selfies, progress pics or outfit-of-the-day (OOTD) pics in this thread!
**Rules**
1. Be nice, **or you will be banned.**
2. Please use [imgur](http://imgur.com/) as a host.
Consider adding commentary on featured brands, sizing, inspiration behind your OOTD (trying to look thin or cover up weightloss, etc.)!
**Remember that anyone can view the contents of this thread even if they are banned from this subreddit. If you receive unwanted messages, please contact the mods with a screenshot of the relevant messages. Note that even if we ban people, they can still message you, and they still have access to the contents of this subreddit. The best thing for you to do is to block them.**
*****
^Selfie, ^progress ^pic ^and ^OOTD ^threads ^are ^posted ^every ^Friday.
^Have ^any ^questions ^or ^concerns? ^Comment ^below, ^or [^PM ^the ^mods.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FproED)
[Other] First EC stack...
/u/jippityjuniper [5'7" | 148 | 23.10 | -20 | F]
Created: Fri Aug 19 05:49:10 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yiglf/first_ec_stack/
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Wow. Lol I know these posts are made all the time but...wow. This is nice haha. I used to take adderall fairly often, and this is like a nicer less-high feeling version of that.
Side note, can't believe how nervous I was to buy bronkaid. So painless and simple. May or may not update later to let others know how it's going.
Edit: took the stack around 6:30am, it's now 10:33am and I'm still feeling the effects pretty hard. Trying to force down some hummus and crackers for 170 cal since I have to drive at noon and always eat before I drive. But I really don't want this, don't think I'll finish it.
Edit: it's 3:58pm and I still want no food though I never took the second dose. I did eat a 110 cal veggie burger around 2pm but it was difficult. So far 280 cals for today.
[Meme/Humor] Having your cake and eating (drinking) it too
/u/YourChinaDoll [5'1" | SW: 169 | CW: 130.4 | F]
Created: Fri Aug 19 05:46:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yig9t/having_your_cake_and_eating_drinking_it_too/
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http://i.imgur.com/zoj4nFA.jpg
[Rant/Rave] Scale nightmare gets worse
/u/FaithHopeTrick [5'7 | CW 124 GW 119 |19.35 | -31lbs | F]
Created: Fri Aug 19 05:24:33 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yid6e/scale_nightmare_gets_worse/
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So I posted recently about being worried about not being able to weigh myself while workmen are in my flat as they are taking up the only bit of flat flooring in my very old building. It's basically a stepped up bit of floor that was added later on and is therefore flatter than the old floorboards.
Anyway I've tried using the rest of the bathroom and kitchen floor but none of it is flat. I get readings in a 5 lbs range within seconds and I cannot CANNOT live like that.
Now my landlady has said that bit of floor is not going to be replaced, instead it will be stripped back to the original floorboards. I feel like I'm going to cry right here at my desk at work.
I can just about cope with a week measuring and not weighing myself but not being able to do ever again in my house is terrifying. I have a routine - pee, remove all clothing and weigh myself. First thing in the morning before a shower every day. I can't get to a gym every morning to do it there and I just don't know what to do. I feel sick.
Im going to a DIY store and get a plank of wood to put under the scale which might help (?) but honestly I feel like binging I'm so upset.
Sorry I know its a boring rant, but nobody else in my life will understand how scary this is and I just want to not feel like a freak.
[Rant/Rave] Holy fuck I hate running
/u/lord_pterodactyl [5'2" | GW: 100 lbs | TBA | F]
Created: Fri Aug 19 04:51:38 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yi8tw/holy_fuck_i_hate_running/
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I hate sweating. I hate the sound of the treadmill. I hate the sound of my fat body thumping on the treadmill when I run. I hate having noodle legs after running. I hate how I can't breathe. I hate the underboob sweat. I hate having sweat drip down my face and pool in my collarbones. I hate how thirsty I get and then no matter how much water I drink, I cannot quench the thirst.
But I hate being fat even more.
So I'm going to keep fucking doing it. Restricting and being a lazy shit only gets you so far.
Still, running is miserable, lol :(
[Help] Looking for an accountability buddy.
/u/Itsemurha [177cm | 71.9kg| 22.43| -47kg | GW: 60kg | F]
Created: Fri Aug 19 04:43:35 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yi7sh/looking_for_an_accountability_buddy/
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[removed]
[Rant/Rave] ED helped me stop drinking as much but has also made me an embarrassing lightweight
/u/bumblebatty [5'7| 117 | 18.26 | -53 | F | GW 115 | UGW 108?]
Created: Fri Aug 19 04:36:14 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yi6vj/ed_helped_me_stop_drinking_as_much_but_has_also/
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I used to drink a bottle or more of wine a day. Definitely contributed to weight gain. But since I've stopped that, the times I do drink, I still just don't fucking get it that after fasting all day and not drinking regularly that my tolerance is REALLY low nowadays.
I'm never going to a work happy hour again.
I think I accidentally called a coworker fat because he commented on my weight loss.
I said something about the only people who commented/noticed were big like me, like I was, or something I DON'T REMEMBER WHAT I SAID BUT IT WAS SOMETHING LIKE THAT.
I'm just really embarrassed :( and I don't remember who it was so I can't apologize.
And then I got lost alone for hours without my phone. And my parents are still home. I want to be alone so badly.
[Meme/Humor] CAN'T BELIEVE I FINALLY REACHED MY GOAL WEIGHT 😭😭😭
/u/commtra [5'7 | GW:110 | -11 | F]
Created: Fri Aug 19 03:55:37 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yi1sb/cant_believe_i_finally_reached_my_goal_weight/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/31c38e90834f47e1b1ac6f9d76695288?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=76f8db14926fd7a20eea777efb92263a
[Rant/Rave] On the topic of body image and body dysmorphia.. brain distortion?
/u/Astroyeti
Created: Fri Aug 19 03:12:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yhwma/on_the_topic_of_body_image_and_body_dysmorphia/
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Does it not bother anyone that they can't figure out what they look like? I look in one bathroom mirror and then another, same pose, but I look so much different. Then I look in the hall mirror, the closet door mirror, the public bathroom mirrors, photo frame reflections, photos, every reflective surface and they all look different. I can even move backwards and forwards in the same mirror, change the position of my head ever so slightly, or look at the same photos many times in a day and still see something different every time. It leads me to avoid looking in the mirror in case one of them is right, knowing I hate what I see in most of them.
And then there arises a problem: it's obvious that either it is a problem of mirrors and a problem in my brain, or maybe it's both. I've realized that everyone else looks different in pictures versus mirrors, too, but they seem okay with it. They don't seem to notice. So maybe it is my brain? And if it is my brain, how am I supposed to know what I look like? People lie to save feelings, they lie to maintain their reputation. I can't ask anyone.
In treatment centers, they tell you to accept that you don't know what you look like and live regardless because that 'doesn't matter', and that bothers me quite a bit. It bothers me both that I'm supposed to accept just looking like anything and that I should be completely okay with the fact that apparently I can't accurately judge reality. It doesn't just stop at what I look like. It extends to whether or not what I think is really how things are or just another distortion. *Is everyone lying to me? Does everyone just put up with me? Am I really not annoying?* And no matter what, I'm supposed to be okay with perceiving reality this way and just assuming that everyone else is telling the truth or 'accepting' that everyone else is telling the truth. Does that not bother anyone?
I know that if I'm capable of something, others likely will be too, so if I'm willing to lie to someone to avoid hurting their feelings, how do I know that others aren't going to tiptoe around me like I do them?
As a mild disclaimer, I'm aware mirror angles (and distortions), lighting, camera, can affect what you look like, but that doesn't change that I'm still not sure which one is the most real if that makes sense. I'm not sure what to do about it either.
[Meme/Humor] Duolingo made me do a double take [other]
/u/downtownhomebound
Created: Fri Aug 19 01:59:15 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yho4r/duolingo_made_me_do_a_double_take_other/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/8aec23b92b62411196c3c7988cfc325b?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=ad951774734cb561a07b8191102e07c7
[Rant/Rave] A binge isn't a binge if it's healthy food, right? RIGHT!?
/u/Melusedek [173 | CW: 58.9 | GW: 56.8 | 19.68/19.45 | F]
Created: Fri Aug 19 01:01:48 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yhhik/a_binge_isnt_a_binge_if_its_healthy_food_right/
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Asking for a friend. A bloated, sick to her stomach in pain friend. 😭
[Discussion] Positive effects of an ED not related to being thin
/u/sunrisesomeday [5'6" | 150lb | UGW:105lb | yo-yo queen]
Created: Fri Aug 19 00:53:34 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yhghv/positive_effects_of_an_ed_not_related_to_being/
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After reading a life pro tips thread about starting your morning off right, it made me reflect on the biggest positive side effect of my ED, that I've stopped drinking.
Just prior to the first time I got sick, and just prior to this relapse, I was an incredibly heavy drinker. We're talking a bottle of wine, and/or 5 gin and tonics per night, alone, heavy drinking. But I barely drink at all now (once or twice per week, always with other people), I have no real desire to drink at all, I don't particularly enjoy it when I do. It's a complete 360 from before, and my mornings now are wonderful for it.
Has anyone else experienced any other positive "side effects" (for lack of a better word) from their ED aside from losing weight?
A 12 year old messaged me..
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Aug 19 00:38:27 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yhenq/a_12_year_old_messaged_me/
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[deleted]
[Help] How to avoid being hospitalized
/u/throwaway03199519 [5'6 | CW 119.4 | GW 110| 19.35| -16.6 | F]
Created: Thu Aug 18 22:36:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4ygy3a/how_to_avoid_being_hospitalized/
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Hey everyone! As i am approaching underweight and have had people noticing my weight loss, people are starting to ask questions and raise concerns about my habits. I'm afraid my family will find out and have me hospitalized, or that my therapist/nutritionist will send me to be hospitalized.
Are there certain things I should avoid saying during sessions so that I cannot be hospitalized? What triggers a hospitalization in general? Is it the weight loss or the way I talk about it? Or is it the more physical symptoms that start appearing the longer my ED continues? Unfortunately I do not have the money for treatment anytime soon.
As for my family, my father is ill and I do not want to add more stress into his life. He knows I'm seeing a nutritionist at school but I told him that I wanted to eat more balanced meals so that's why I decided to go, especially while I have student insurance. How can I reassure him/other members of my family?
TL:DR; how do I avoid being hospitalized while still losing weight?
[Goal] I FIT INTO JEANS I HAVENT WORN IN 3 YEARS
/u/stephanynotstokes [5'6 |Weight Lost: 70 lbs | F]
Created: Thu Aug 18 22:00:39 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4ygsmr/i_fit_into_jeans_i_havent_worn_in_3_years/
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*cant flair on mobile*
so, I was cleaning my room and I found this really old pair of forever 21 jeans from when I was a sophomore (3 years ago) in college. I havent worn anything other than oversized shorts during the summers and leggings during the winter, never anything tight since I had gained over 60 pounds. BUT I LOST IT (well 4 more pounds and I'll be back to where I was but) IM SO EXCITED!!! I CAN FINALLY FIT JEANS AT FOREVER 21! I CAN FINALLY SHOP THERE AGAIN BECAUSE I CAN FIT THE CLOTHES!!!
(I'm still gonna be in the plus section but before I was so big I couldn't even fit the plus. And most stores didn't have my sizes which was embarrassing )
This was big for me because those days where I'd gain or binge I felt like I was never going to get here and I did. And I'd like to thank everyone on this sub for listening to me through my pains and supporting me. This 60 pounds I lost, is all because of you guys. I love uuuuu!
2 months, -20ish lbs (potato quality, sorry)
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Aug 18 21:48:17 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4ygqsl/2_months_20ish_lbs_potato_quality_sorry/
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[removed]
[Tip] Quest cooking Facebook page is the shit.
/u/turtle4president [5'2" | 106.2 | 20.12 | F/20]
Created: Thu Aug 18 18:52:34 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yfxct/quest_cooking_facebook_page_is_the_shit/
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I stumbled upon it through Halo Top Creamery's FB page and holy hell there are so many healthy recipes using Quest bars and other alternative ingredients. It's super neat.
Just thought I'd share!
(Sorry mobile,
No flair!)
[Rant/Rave] Things I've been yelled at/threatened for
/u/negativeraisins [5'0" | 69 lb | 14.19 | -53 lb | FTM]
Created: Thu Aug 18 18:34:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yfua7/things_ive_been_yelled_atthreatened_for/
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* Feeling like vomiting after being forced to eat too much
* Saying that if I eat an amount, I'll feel sick
* And now, for eating too slowly, as that should affect the amount of food I'm being forced to eat for... Some... Reason?
Lmao, I fucking love it.
[Discussion] Encased in fat
/u/agentcherrycola
Created: Thu Aug 18 18:27:11 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yfszf/encased_in_fat/
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I'm at the point now where I can *see* the shape of a skinny girl inside me but there's this 2 inch layer of fat over the top of her... It's so frustrating!! I'm also only 20lbs off my goal so I'm half way!! Has anyone else reached this point and actually found it more depressing than motivating?
[Discussion] Does being slim make you feel any different?
/u/wanderingrugrat [5'0" | cw: 96.8 lbs | -40 lbs | f]
Created: Thu Aug 18 18:01:23 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yfome/does_being_slim_make_you_feel_any_different/
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Those of you who've reached your UGWs, or in general objectively consider yourself to be slim, does it help your confidence? Do you feel any happier?
I know a lot of us with EDs can get stuck in the mindset of "when I'm skinny or get to a certain weight everything will be better." Do those of you who are find any truth in that - that your problems have gotten better or your ED lessened, etc once you hit where you want to be?
[Meme/Humor] I finally found Halo Top ice cream!
/u/BluestNovember [5'4" | SW: 200+ lbs | CW: too high | BMI: over 30 | -20lbs | F]
Created: Thu Aug 18 17:27:49 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yfitg/i_finally_found_halo_top_ice_cream/
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https://imgur.com/a/xkz0k
[Rant/Rave] He said my thigh are "squishy" :(((
/u/honeytarte [5'5" | CW: 119 | GW: 105 | -25 |]
Created: Thu Aug 18 17:11:04 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yffu7/he_said_my_thigh_are_squishy/
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My boyfriend, while we're just hanging out, will just poke my legs sometimes and it's kind of cute but I asked him why he does it and he said it's because they're "squishy." He then followed it up with that it's not a bad thing and that he likes squishy, and that's why he likes my boobs/etc but like goddamn that felt absolutely awful. I don't want to be squishy I want to be muscular and slim and toned. :(( Ugh. I just raised my weekly/daily calories too because I'm trying to be a little "better" (I just posted about it) and I feel gross about it now.
[Rant/Rave] So much inspiration at the a tech conference today
/u/cheeekyslug [5'6" | UGW: 90 | -60 lbs since 6/20/16 | 19/F]
Created: Thu Aug 18 16:37:02 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yf9mb/so_much_inspiration_at_the_a_tech_conference_today/
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Attended a tech conference for a major company in San Francisco today! Ahhhh so much inspiration everywhere.
While there was like a 50:1 girl ratio, all the girls I saw today were goals. Literally everyone in SF has this very elegant, chic look and it was just so inspiring to see girls in the field literally revolutionizing the tech industry.
Anyways this morning I ran into some girls who were also going into the event because they were in this engineering association I'm part of. They told me they worked in Silicon Valley and did software engineering (!!!). They were literally thinspo AF. And not only were they thin, but they also very attractive and had this very Bella Hadid aspect of them. There was a complimentary breakfast and all they drank was black coffee and for lunch we had these lunch kits that had fruit, pasta, tarte, and a sandwich wrap thing. Literally they tossed out everything but the fruit and ate like two bites of pasta and just sipped on their diet Dr.Pepper instead. UGHH it's like can I be you guys??? Anyways we networked and we plan to have go out for dinner some time, but a) I can't believe they were so nice to some as average as me and b) can I be like, be them please??
Also during the keynote, I sat next to this guy who was literally boyfriend goals and it's just keeping me so optimistic and takes away parts of the self-hate in an ED.
[Goal] These were actually tight in April
/u/thinsignificant [6'0|142lbs|18.51|-32lbs| F]
Created: Thu Aug 18 15:38:16 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yeym6/these_were_actually_tight_in_april/
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http://i.imgur.com/nDFUuOc.jpg
[Help] GW wasn't enough. Feeling discouraged and confused.
/u/wanderingrugrat [5'0" | cw: 96.8 lbs | -40 lbs | f]
Created: Thu Aug 18 15:14:24 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yetwx/gw_wasnt_enough_feeling_discouraged_and_confused/
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Hi guys.
So during the last few weeks I've been working really hard at restricting and fasting. I haven't binged very much - so a personal victory, yayyy. From last month at this time to now, I've gone from 115 to 96 lbs. I'm 5 feet tall. my goal weight initially was 95 lbs.
I'm feeling really upset now that I'm here. While I've definitely lost weight I'm nowhere near where I want to be. I'm still flabby and chubby, even after working so hard. I have a 25/26 inch waist right now, which is again down from where I was last month but not enough. I'm not skinny or even slim, and it's devastating. Maybe I'm just being dysmorphic (I'm sure I am to a certain extent), but I know I'm not where I wanna be. :(
Looking at BMI stuff and how some people on here are at this weight at a way taller height, I realize maybe my goal weight was too high.
But it makes me just feel lost and out of control. How much further do I have to go? Am I even close? Will my hard work ever pay off? I don't know if I want to binge or go fast for as long as I can take it. Either way, I feel really self destructive. I definitely need some support and insight right now :(. Everyone else who is at 95 lbs seems to look so skinny - /u/smokesanddietcokes is totally goals for instance. However, I don't exercise so my body fat is high for 95 lbs. What would be a good goal weight for me? And last question, have you ever felt like this?
Anyway, thank you all for reading. Fuck EDs, right? So draining lol.
[Meme/Humor] Oh, I wish!
/u/BluestNovember [5'4" | SW: 200+ lbs | CW: too high | BMI: over 30 | -20lbs | F]
Created: Thu Aug 18 14:10:14 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yeh3z/oh_i_wish/
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https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/564x/64/54/9e/64549ed9e48f578645026fd03f8e61fe.jpg
[Discussion] Wondering if anyone has made this keto bread?
/u/mermaid_puppy [5'11" | 137lb | UGW 115 | F]
Created: Thu Aug 18 13:41:25 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yeb93/wondering_if_anyone_has_made_this_keto_bread/
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https://joyfulgirl.org/2015/09/23/perfectprimobread/
[Discussion] First B/P in almost half a year
/u/OperatingOnScientist [5'3 | 137lbs | 24.94 | F | UGW 110lbs]
Created: Thu Aug 18 12:24:16 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4ydvg4/first_bp_in_almost_half_a_year/
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Is it wrong that I'm proud of myself because it means I'll stop being such a fatty? :/
[Discussion] Bronkaid with a cold?
/u/pungentthrowaway [5'1" | CW: 154 | -13 | F]
Created: Thu Aug 18 12:17:38 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4ydu1m/bronkaid_with_a_cold/
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So this actually seems like a good idea? It's actually for asthma right so maybe it'll open up my sinuses? Just wondering if anyone has experiences with this. I had my first major binge in months a couple of nights ago because my main source of comfort when I'm sick is eating and that needs to change. Now I can't breathe through my nose and all I want is pizza :/
I need to make some tea
Edited to update: I took a bronkaid with a 200mg caffeine pill and my sinuses are OPEN. PRAISE BE UNTO BRONKAID
tfw u meal prep for the week but purge that same meal
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Aug 18 11:39:50 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4ydm9f/tfw_u_meal_prep_for_the_week_but_purge_that_same/
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[removed]
[Other] /u/Bandersnatch-Cunt, I made you a thing
/u/Noroeste [5'6 | can fit in a rowboat | F]
Created: Thu Aug 18 11:22:30 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4ydirv/ubandersnatchcunt_i_made_you_a_thing/
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It's a PDF scan of [Thin](https://drive.google.com/open?id=0By-hpW96C5yNaUx2bHl5dkhDam8) by Grace Bowman <3
Slim fast?
/u/stephanynotstokes [5'6 |Weight Lost: 70 lbs | F]
Created: Thu Aug 18 11:11:00 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4ydgfx/slim_fast/
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[removed]
[Rant/Rave] Lost as fuck.
/u/negativeraisins [5'0" | 69 lb | 14.19 | -53 lb | FTM]
Created: Thu Aug 18 11:07:25 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4ydfpi/lost_as_fuck/
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This is going to be long, and messy, and I don't even know if I'm flairing this right, but I really don't know. I'm lost as hell and I don’t really know what’s even happening.
So, here's the thing: due to being away from my parents a lot, I was able to lose a lot of weight. Over the summer, I dropped to 70 pounds. I still feel fat, but when I look in the mirror I’m actually… Sorta satisfied? My ribs and collarbones and hipbones are visible, I can pass without a binder, I look thin and androgynous, I have a thigh gap, and I actually feel... Not bad about my body. Pretty good, actually, although I still want to keep losing and there are specific areas I want to lose more. I never thought I’d make it to this point, though, where I could maintain and go “this is acceptable!”.
Additionally, I get hungry much, much less often, and don't really want to eat. I prefer not eating over eating, and when I do get hungry (very rarely - maybe once every two or three days), I am satiated rather easily. (I had half a cup of black bean soup from Panera, while trying to avoid all the beans/vegetables/etc. and only eat the liquid, and was uncomfortably full and getting to be in pain.) Also, whether out of habit or because I just don't, I don't really want things like cakes or sweets or junk food anymore. I just don't want to or feel like eating, beyond weight loss. And I have plenty of energy - I get tired far less easily than other people, actually, and can walk for ages, and can hike and think clearly and I'm just fine.
However, I had to give up hiding my eating habits from my parents - there was just no other way for me to restrict as low as I needed to. And they kept yelling at me, and intimidating/blackmailing/threatening me into eating (“If you don’t eat more I’m going to hospitalize you”, “you’re not even trying” - when I’d been forcing myself to eat most of the time because I wasn’t hungry or didn’t feel like eating) even when I *told* them that I would feel sick because that amount of food would be too much for me, and getting mad at me when I told them afterwards that I felt like vomiting because it was actually just too much food. I’ve given up telling them when I’m in actual physical pain after they force me to eat more, because they just don’t listen or get mad. The thing is, after all this time, neither of them ever suspected anorexia or weight-loss things at all and still don’t, which is truly incredible. (Now that I think about it, it means they’ve been yelling at me and threatening me for… Getting sick? Having a small appetite? What the fuck?)
They forced me to go to a psychologist (they kept telling me “something’s wrong with you”, “you’re abnormal”, “there’s something wrong with your brain that you’re not hungry/have such a small appetite”, etc.), and scheduled a bunch of other appointments that I ended up not having to go to… Because we went to our family doctor. That I insisted on going to. Because I needed eyedrops for an eye infection. I feel so fucking stupid, I should have just dealt with it - the doctor forced me to get weighed and then she freaked the hell out. Called up a gastroentologist, an endocrinologist, said make more appointments. If I had avoided that appointment, I could have insisted to my parents still that they were overreacting and they didn’t have any actual medical concerns… Fuck me.
I’m so scared of gaining weight. The truth of it hasn’t sunk in yet, that gaining weight is inevitable… The only reason my dysphoria’s okay now is because I’m so thin and look androgynous - Plus, I actually just don’t get hungry as much and don’t want to eat anymore, so eating is going to actually really hurt. I’m trying to postpone the weight gain as much as possible - I have a little edge because I’m used to thinking about calories and such while they don't, and because they’re fine with me exercising since they don’t think it was every weight-loss motivated, so right now I’m trying to get them to not worry so much about the weight numbers themselves and just focus on getting me to eat more (while eating low-calorie things, like vegetables, and getting them to let me avoid things like carbs by saying I’m avoiding them for health or acne concerns because hey I’m a hormonal teenager), but I don’t know what I’ll do when they start actually wanting to see the numbers go up. I’ll fake it as much as I can with water weight and sodium bloating and trying to build muscle, but… I don’t think I’ll be able to emotionally handle it, especially when they start making me gain real weight, even with me trying to draw it out as long as possible to a pound a week so that during the school year I could manage my own breakfasts and lunches. My mother wanted me to gain 30 pounds by the start of the school year - that’s over ten pounds a week. And all the time when I look up "healthy weights”, the lowest numbers that come up most often are in the 95-100 range - I can’t handle that. I don’t think I can handle that. Maybe up to 80, sure, but that much... I don't know.
What’s worse, my mother dug out an old scale that’s off by three pounds, so they’re going to think I weigh even less than I actually do.
I don’t know. I don’t know. I don’t know what to do. They were talking about hospitalizing me so much. I’m scared and I’m fine with my body now and I don’t think I could handle gaining weight. And the actual gaining weight process will suck because I don’t want to eat anymore. I don’t know. My mind still hasn’t accepted it yet really. I don’t know. I’m sorry this is so long and so repetitive, but I just don’t know. I don't know if I want to keep losing, but I don't want to eat and I just want to be left alone.
[Help] Getting out of eating dinner
/u/In_a_fatsuit [64" | 127# | 22.2 BMI | -96# | F]
Created: Thu Aug 18 11:05:52 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4ydfe5/getting_out_of_eating_dinner/
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What are some good activities to participate in during evenings? I NEED more fast days, but the hubby is growing suspicious. I can't go shopping every day, and I dont have a bunch of daily errands to keep me out past 630p. We eat late in our house. I'd have to be gone until 9p for it to seem believable that I got dinner while on the road. Does anyone have any suggestions? (I'm not looking to join an aerobics class.). The weather will only be nice here another month, so I can't just fuck off for a few hours and then head home much longer. And I'm having trouble finding reasons to fuck off for a few hours now anyway.
[Discussion] I don't know what I am anymore
/u/Arc_cake [5'5 | 149.6 | 25.19 | -6.2 | F]
Created: Thu Aug 18 10:46:33 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4ydbg2/i_dont_know_what_i_am_anymore/
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I'm on the edge of this disordered eating blowing up. Right now I'm lying in bed, wanting to go get food, but telling myself I'm not really hungry and honestly wondering if I can make it until my break at work, around 9 hours from now.
I've been eating around one meal a day for a while now, not entirely purposefully but I always tell myself to wait a little longer if I'm hungry. And people have commented that I'm looking thinner now and honestly I love it, but I think that might push me over the edge.
I'm leaving to school soon too, in a different province than my parents, and it'll be so easy there to fast.
But none of this behaviour is done in the sake of an eating disorder, yknow, it just kinda happens, and I'm not sure if that's just because I've grown so used to this that I think it's normal but idk where I stand or if I belong in this sub even.
Thanks for listening to my jumbled rambling.
[Rant/Rave] [Rant] 3 lbs up. I'm freaking out.
/u/pineapplesandham [5'3 | 97 lbs | 17.6 | -10 lbs | F]
Created: Thu Aug 18 10:36:51 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yd9et/rant_3_lbs_up_im_freaking_out/
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I recently started taking birth control (Marvelon 21; my doctor said it's a good idea to have a period at least once in a while so he prescribed these to regulate my menstrual cycle), and holy fuck, I've ballooned. I was about 94.5 lbs before, but I've gone all the way up to 97.5 lbs (when I weighed myself before breakfast yesterday). To most people this seems inconsequential, but in my eyes that is a staggering amount of weight.
My rational mind tells me that it's probably water weight, but I'm so scared that my recent snacking has bumped me weight up. I feel heavy and gross; I feel disgusting. I don't want to exercise anymore, I've not been as strict with my calorie intake. I stick to about 1200 recorded calories a day, but I end up snacking on about 100 - 200 calories' worth of stuff, which should bring me to maintenance. But those 3 lbs are killing me, especially since I worked so hard to get to 94.5!
Does anyone have experience with water weight and birth control? Could I really have gained 3 lbs of water, because that seems like a lot?
I hate this. Ugh.
[Discussion] Daily Food Diary! August 18, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Thu Aug 18 10:02:29 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yd2dx/daily_food_diary_august_18_2016/
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This is a daily food diary thread for August 18, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
[Help] Update(ish) - I was worried about moving in with my bf & hiding my eating habits. We had "the talk"
/u/IWant2BASkeleton [5'7 | 151.0 | 23.7 | -16.8 | F]
Created: Thu Aug 18 09:35:27 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4ycx4c/updateish_i_was_worried_about_moving_in_with_my/
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I guess what I really should say is *he* had the talk at me. Essentially he said that he won't stand for me being unhealthy and that I *had to* eat every day and that I had to eat at least more than once and that I cannot be more concerned with counting calories than being healthy and I can't not eat to lose 5 lbs for no reason because I'll end up starving myself and he won't allow that. And that if he has to have this conversation with me every day he will, but it won't be a conversation, it'll be him *telling* me.
So. I can't tell how to feel about this. Part of me feels like *how fucking dare you. It's MY body, so it's MY choice.* The other part of me just wanted to break down and ask him to help me. I don't want to give up this at all. But I know he's doing this out of love. And I know he's worried about me. And to be honest, it feels amazing to have someone see through my bullshit. Like, my family committed me to inpatient and they STILL can't tell what is actually going on with me again (still??). My family still can't see me. They think "oh, she's getting so fit, she's going to the gym every day, she's very strict on her diet.... no way she could be sick again and hiding it, she's definitely just super disciplined." My boyfriend who didn't see any of that happen just kind of understands me. He knows kinda about my past, but not a huge amount but he *sees me.* You know?
Anyway, wow that was a rant. Anyway, I really don't know what to do. I don't want him to say "you're too sick, I can't do this." But I don't want to get fat(ter) again. He did weigh himself on my scale and realize he was about 10 lbs heavier than the thought, so he wants to lose weight. So maybe I can just say "we're in this together!" and because he's trying to lose weight it won't be as weird when I'm counting calories. Maybe I'll up my gym schedule to include 2-a-days on yoga only days and an extra run or two during the week. Do all my eating at home so it looks like I'm eating more during the day than I am?
Thoughts? Advice? Please help?
[Help] C&S binges - help to stop
/u/chipmunknutter
Created: Thu Aug 18 09:31:19 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4ycw90/cs_binges_help_to_stop/
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I feel embarrassed to post but here goes. I mostly lurk here but I'm not sure where else to go so thought I would reach out. My current issue - I can't stop chewing and spitting.
My quick backstory. I restricted heavily 9 years ago and reached my ultimate low weight of 87 lbs at 5'7". I would not eat during the weekdays and attempt to make up for it on weekends. I "recovered" somewhat abruptly 3 years ago when one day I just started eating. I went through serious refeeding syndrome and gained shit tons of weight very quickly, most water in very odd locations. I healthy dieted to a healthy weight and was fit and without an ED thoughts then restriction started again but a similar yet different pattern. I would eat during the week because I wanted to fuel workouts and then eat at surplus on the weekends to stay at maintenance. I was ok with my physique but couldn't shake the restriction so compensated for it. Soon I started to chew and spit. It just started. I had done it a few times when heavily restricted but nothing more than a few bites. When it happened it was mostly that I wanted the taste of the food but not the calories. Since then, the past year mostly, it's spiraled. I only chew and spit one food - nuts! I spend like $100 a week now on nuts. It's only on the weekends, used to be Sunday but has crept to Friday and Saturday. I hate it but I love it.
The more I try to stop the worse the urges get. I feel I used to get something positive from it but now I don't even get that. I hate it, I hate it while I'm doing it but I can't stop until I finish it all even if it means taking handfuls of nuts and just throwing them away to make the jar more empty. The past few weeks I've not even wanted to do it, it's like a chore but I do it anyway. I just don't get why. I've read Brain over Binge and know it doesn't matter why that I just need to resist the urge but I guess to be honest I fear letting go of it. I also don't why that is but I guess it's a safety but a safety from what? What do I lose by not chewing and spitting lbs of nuts? Why is it scary to stop? The more I fight it, it gets worse, the binge gets worse, I buy more nuts I guess in sort of a "this is my last" sort of mentality but then once the negative post-binge feelings pass, I crave it again even though I know I'll feel like shit after.
Recently I've been thinking that maybe it would be easier to just engage it once a week since my weight is stable. But that's silly given how ego dystonic it is as it makes me so mad at myself both the money and the patheticness of it all and the physical GI upset - nut fragments get down which my bacteria ferment and it's just so uncomfortable to be bloated, gassy and have loose nut stools for 2 days.
This all sounds crazy. Just thought I'd reach out to see if anyone else has managed to stop this behavior and how? How do you not give in to urges when you feel you'll miss binging? What is it I feel I'll miss?
[Goal] Prevented disaster. Really proud of myself
/u/justputitdown [5'8" | 152.2 | 22.9 | 31.4 | F]
Created: Thu Aug 18 08:39:16 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4ycm4r/prevented_disaster_really_proud_of_myself/
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(Sorry for the wall of text I'm just really relieved and amazed)
I struggle with late night binging. That's sort of an understatement... I hide food in my room or wait until my roommate falls asleep and then get up and snack. I lose all of my discipline after dinner :( Last night, I could feel a binge coming on before dinner even started, so I had a big bowl of broth/bouillon before dinner, then had a vegetable based dinner... and I was feeling ok but not great. I wanted chocolate BADLY
I was venting a little to my roommate and her boyfriend about it, and they said oh ok let's go get ice cream then! And i paused for a moment and in my mind was like oh my god yes let's go... then I thought about how hard I have worked and how if I am able to have second thoughts about something, that _I am in control_ and I decided to NOT eat.
I have never experienced making the decision to not start a binge. I always feel it and then decide to just drink broth or eat air popped popcorn, or conversely I just don't feel like binging. Last night, I straight up said no. I chugged a liter of water, brushed my teeth, flossed, used mouthwash, and then got in my bed with more water and a book.
We can all do this you guys. We just have to listen to the tiny voice that says 'maybe not today? or maybe just not right now?' and _listen_.
[Help] Fell off the wagon again, but this time I'm trying a new approach.
/u/HowToBeAsian25 [5'3.5 |115lbs |19.78 |-19 | F]
Created: Thu Aug 18 08:37:53 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yclvc/fell_off_the_wagon_again_but_this_time_im_trying/
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Ate my way back up to 118 in attempts to "start eating healthy", ha, what a joke.
Part of my decision to give restricting a break is because of my friend u/DivingRightIn falling off the grid and me thinking [something bad had happened to her](https://www.reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xw34i/reality_check/), (BY THE WAY SHE IS TOTALLY FINE, SHE PM'D ME AND SAID SHE WAS SO OVERWHELMED AT HOW MANY PEOPLE WERE WORRIED FOR HER SAFETY).
Anyways, slimfast shakes.
One for breakfast and one for lunch with a small dinner consisting mostly of veggies and some sort of lean meat.
I tried to look up if anyone else has had success with slimfast in this sub and no one has seemed to mention it. Is there something you guys know that I don't regarding these shakes? Because the chocolate ones are totally delicious, and I think a structured meal plan that doesn't heavily rely on counting calories is exactly what I need right now.
Starting my new diet (again) today. I guess my ED can rest when I'm dead.
[Tip] Ginger-Lemon Water!
/u/TemporaryAccount_101 [5'3'' | AHAHAH | -5.5kgs | 18F]
Created: Thu Aug 18 08:36:44 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yclmx/gingerlemon_water/
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Hello lovelies! I just remembered one thing I use when hunger strikes.
Ginger-lemon water. It's easy to make, tasty and low in calories. I basically peel and cut ginger, squeeze a lemon (or half, I don't use a recipe so it's up to you) put them in water and wait 'til said water boils.
After that I let it rest for a while (3\5 mins) and filter it in a jar or something. When it cools down I put in the fridge and it's ready for the next day!
I love tea but during summer I need something fresh that fills me up, and this is perfect!
It tastes like lemon but it's spicy like ginger, it soothes my stomach and makes me feel refreshed.
It also kills some of my cravings sometimes, and you can drink it as much as you want.
(I also love ginger tea, highly recommended).
EDIT: spelling, sorry.
[Help] Will this ever work out? In need of some real life motivation
/u/bloodketosexmagic
Created: Thu Aug 18 07:50:43 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4ycd3i/will_this_ever_work_out_in_need_of_some_real_life/
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Have any of you been at high 140s low 150s and gotten to/close to your goal weights? I know its calories in calories out, but with my eating/mental disorder casting over me i just can't see it being possible.
Any advice on time length or regimes or just a ray of hope would be so so appreciated right now.
Ps I'm 5'3
[Discussion] "Safe" Thinspo?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Aug 18 07:10:31 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yc5zs/safe_thinspo/
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[deleted]
[Thinspo] Woman w my goal body
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Aug 18 07:01:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yc4db/woman_w_my_goal_body/
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https://www.instagram.com/airilyee/
[Discussion] Weekly Emotional Support August 18, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Thu Aug 18 06:02:48 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4ybvjb/weekly_emotional_support_august_18_2016/
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We're almost all dealing with quite stressful things outside of our eating disorders. Whether it be complicated relationships, friends, university, work or other mental illnesses like depression, anxiety or OCD, we all seem to be having a rougher time emotionally and mentally than the general population.
Use this thread to post about your problems or ask for advice concerning things other than EDs/ED behaviors.
**As always, follow the sub rules when reading or posting.**
*****
^Weekly ^emotional ^well-being ^and ^support ^threads ^are ^posted ^every ^Thursday.
^Have ^any ^questions ^or ^concerns? ^Comment ^below, ^or [^PM ^the ^mods.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FproED)
[Discussion] To people who aren't using throwaway accounts: have you gotten disrespecting comments on your posts in other subreddits?
/u/commtra [5'7 | GW:110 | -11 | F]
Created: Thu Aug 18 05:56:11 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4ybuke/to_people_who_arent_using_throwaway_accounts_have/
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Although I mostly post here, this is still also my casual everything reddit. No one's ever mentioned anything about reading through my previous comments or posts.
I've seen some people here say that they've gotten negative feedback on posts not related to their ED though. I guess I'm just interested in hearing if this happens often.
edit: changed flair soz for any confusion
[Rant/Rave] I need some catharsis
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Aug 18 04:39:47 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4ybkho/i_need_some_catharsis/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] I purged for the first time since before I got pregnant...
/u/YouMeAndSymmetry
Created: Thu Aug 18 03:40:12 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4ybd3e/i_purged_for_the_first_time_since_before_i_got/
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And I peed myself. My kid is 2. I tried to get healthy/get my mind right. I've restricted only since having him. I took up drinking way more than I should, but I tend to restrict what I eat. Sometimes I suck at it. And tonight I purged for the first time in almost three years. I fucking peed myself and I didn't even know I had to go.
[Meme/Humor] When I tell my boyfriend I'm being good by eating three meals today...
/u/MakingBadDecisions [5'7" | 121lbs | BMI 18.89 | Female]
Created: Thu Aug 18 03:37:47 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4ybcsy/when_i_tell_my_boyfriend_im_being_good_by_eating/
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Over 800 calories which isn't ideal but mwahahahahhaa
http://imgur.com/a/CsmxS
[Rant/Rave] [snotty crying rant] don't binge don't binge don't binge
/u/satanAMA [173cm (5'9) | 63kg (141lbs) | 21 | 27kg (60lbs) | F]
Created: Thu Aug 18 03:05:10 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yb8z3/snotty_crying_rant_dont_binge_dont_binge_dont/
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[removed]
[Rant/Rave] Random thought
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Aug 18 02:06:00 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yb23k/random_thought/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] Days without scales - freaking out
/u/FaithHopeTrick [5'7 | CW 124 GW 119 |19.35 | -31lbs | F]
Created: Thu Aug 18 01:29:05 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yaxpn/days_without_scales_freaking_out/
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I've mentioned previously that I have to weigh myself daily to hold myself accountable, otherwise I will binge. It's how my mind works, if I've gained its really motivational to restrict more that day and of I've lost its even more motivational to keep on track. I've started weighing myself at night too when I can't sleep.
Anyhow there is only one flat floor in my house and due to some problems with the building its about to be taken up for works. I'm totally freaking out because A) it's min 4 days without a scale and B) what if the workmen don't put that bit of floor back in flat?? It's the only space I have and if they fuck it up I won't be able to weigh myself at all, ever.
I feel like crying. I want to ask the workmen to be extra careful about putting it back flat but I don't want to piss them off or sound insane.
Anyone know how to use scales on an uneven floor? Like if I put a large flat bit of wood underneath would that help?
Rant/rave - mobile
[Rant/Rave] Not sick enough for this "recovery" thing.
/u/smokesanddietcokes [<3 ]
Created: Thu Aug 18 00:37:14 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yargt/not_sick_enough_for_this_recovery_thing/
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I got a letter today from the eating disorder people my GP told me to refer myself to. They are ready to take me off the waiting list and give me an initial appointment. I just need to ring up. If I don't ring up within 2 weeks, all that will happen is they'll take me off their list and transfer my care back to my GP. I havn't been diagnosed or anything, my GP just told me to call them when I admitted guilt about eating etc.
.. I admit, I want to live a life without guilt and needing to be/look perfect. I want to enjoy food again, the times I enjoy food with my partner are nice. I don't want to worry about being fat.. if it's possible.
But.. I'm a healthy BMI right now. I am active, but not overly so - I'm pretty much doctor-recommended levels of active. Currently I'm only fasting/restricting 3 times a week because that's all my weak willpower can manage, and sometimes I fuck even that up. I binged all last week for instance, it was gross (but delicious..)
I only worry about fat because I *do* look very chubby, and my bf% looks much too high. It's not like I'm really thin and worried about being/getting fat - I'm a legit chubby looking person wanting to not be anymore. I only don't enjoy food because I give in too much, and really should be eating way less to lose the fat. I actually love food, the guilt/lack of enjoyment comes from how I eat too much of it and my bad willpower.
Sure, I fasted a lot and restricted most of the time down from obese to here, but that's over now because my appetite rages on gym days.. and just randomly.. so yeah, I eat normally (or even too much) most days now.
Infact.. I don't even feel 'not sick enough', I feel that I am not sick *at all*. I feel like a chubby person who just needs to lose a bit more weight.. And yeah, I feel like a total imposter on this sub most days, but I just can't quit you guys. Despite feeling like I am an imposter and on this sub for the total wrong reasons, I relate to you all too much to go. I need to be here, for thoughts I can't really tell anyone else. I feel most comfortable with all of you.. even over my partner sometimes. I know he'd not be comfortable if I told him half the things I tell you (although I am trying to be more open with him and he's handling it okay). Erk :(
So I don't see the point of ringing them back. It's the NHS so they can't help even if I was actually sick unless my BMI was low. I think I might ring them and just tell them that. "I told my doctor I had problems eating but really I am a normal healthy BMI and truth be told I still eat a lot".
Or.. more likely.. say I'll ring them back, but keep putting it off until I legit forget and they take me off their list.
Maybe I'll deserve to eat, to enjoy, to be guilt free, to not worry about being fat when I am 88lbs. Or 85. But that wont be happening any time soon.
[Help] worst relapse of my life... please help [b/p]
/u/edthrow123
Created: Thu Aug 18 00:34:20 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4yar3h/worst_relapse_of_my_life_please_help_bp/
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hi guys. i'm a long long long time lurker of this sub but never posted on my main account before...
basically the past few weeks ive relapsed the hardest i have in my life. the past week especially, i've been b/ping 2+x a day. im at my highest weight in a year and i'm seeing my boyfriend in exactly one week. at this point when i think about it i physically wretch because i cant stand myself right now. but i can't stop for some reason.
i've been diagnosed atypical anoresxia b/p subtype, usually i alternate between periods of restrict/fast and b/p cycles but this is the worst it's ever been...
idk what i'm even asking for, maybe something here will inspire me, or force me to stop. when my b/ping gets out of control my life spirals down. when i'm restricting i feel neat and in control in all areas of my life... i just dont know why i cant stop right now.
help please?
[Tip] South Korea and Japan: Information
/u/negativeraisins [5'0" | 69 lb | 14.19 | -53 lb | FTM]
Created: Wed Aug 17 22:10:04 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4ya82h/south_korea_and_japan_information/
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Hello everyone! I have not been rather active on this sub for months and months, mainly because I have been away in Korea and Japan for the summer. I figured that I could help provide some information for if any of you ever end up going.
For the record: I was in Korea not only as a tourist (and being assumed to be a local), but also for academic programs and visiting family, while I was only in Japan as a tourist, so my experiences are different and may differ from what you experience.
Additionally, I have not been back in the West for long, and the people that I have seen are almost completely family, so I may not be able to accurately say the differences between Korea/Japan and the U.S. as I have gotten used to much of Korea.
In general:
* The low obesity rates are really obvious; throughout the whole month and a half, in both countries, I only ever saw maybe two actually obese people (who weren't foreigners).
Korea: (Mostly Seoul, but cities throughout the country as well)
* For the record, there are not many high-school age students around in Korea during this time; it jumps from about elementary to early middle-school age to college students and young adults. Therefore, body comparisons may be a bit mixed.
* There is a mix of body types, but most people are skinny to average.
* The only chubby people I really saw who weren't were young, from high school to young adult range.
* High-school age girls are mostly an average body type, and mostly about the same body type - very skinny students are rare. Actually, it was kind of surprising how everyone had similar body types.
* High-school age guys are mostly average to thin, with the occasional kind of chubby dude.
* You are expected to eat a lot. A lot a lot a lot. Food portions at schools are gigantic, and you wil be pushed into eating more if you're eating a sit down meal with Korean people. (Although that's just Korean people in general lmao, we show our love through making you eat. Unfortunately.)
* There's a lot of food waste as well, however.
* Lotteria, a fast food chain there, does in fact have the caloric information up on the boards like McDonald's does, so don't worry.
* Traditional Korean food places will not have caloric information (although that's the same with pretty much any traditional food place anywhere).
* Bakeries are everywhere... Kind of hand-in-hand with cafes. Chances will be, though, that they offer black coffee of some sort unless its one of the just straight-up bakeries.
* There are vending machines everywhere, and they're cheap - I saw a can of Milkis for 500 won (about 50 cents), whereas in the U.S. it'd be a dollar minimum. The temptation is strong.
* Food is cheap, and convenience stores often have 1 + 1 deals, so the temptation can be strong.
* There are cafes and convenience stores every other corner - you will never not have a place to buy snacks.
* However, adding onto the previous point with cafes, americanos - and coffee in general - are a huge thing in Korea, and coffee vending machines are pretty common (although I didn't get a close look at them, they should definitely offer americanos). You will never not have a place to get coffee, at least in Seoul and probably in most other cities as well.
* I really have to emphasize the presence of food - there are food stands in almost every subway station.
* Movie theaters have caramel popcorn, and the temptation can be strong.
* At a rest stop, all the food had calorie counts on them!
* At Lotte World in Seoul, all the food had calorie counts.
* Some maps/signs in Seoul and at mountains said how many calories you would burn by walking x amount of distance, and things like what that was equivalent to (like bibimbap = x calories = x hours x minutes walking).
* Since there are mountains everywhere - you walk five minutes from Seoul and there you go, mountain - hiking is a common part of life. You'll see a lot of grandmas and grandpas in colorful hiking gear on the subway.
* I got a lot, lot more (direct) comments about my appearance in Korea than in Japan (For me, it was that I had to gain weight...). While this was probably mostly due to being around teachers, family, friends, etc., I had a tour guide tell me directly that I was too skinny while rubbing my arms (this is probably only applicable to me/other Korean kids since she wouldn't do that to a random tourist lmao, but still). Sellers in Dongdaemun were having casual conversation with my mom about how I should gain some weight (although again, if you're just a tourist and they're not assuming you're a local I doubt they'll do that), or would tell me straight to my face that I was too small for a piece of clothing without jumping around the topic the way an American seller would. When meeting my aunt's friends for the very first time, one of them said "Is it not that you've been taking food from your child?" (talking about me being too thin and my mother being fat.)
* High school age girls are kind of expected to be sort of chubby, I think?
* Jeonju hanok village is all food...
* Serving sizes for traditional Korean food places are pretty damn large.
* It's socially acceptable to say things like "I need to lose weight" or "you need to lose weight", or things about appearance in general (like skin tone, having clear/not clear skin, being heavyset, etc.)
* Insadong is going to have a lot of food stands, so know that if you go.
* Pizza is not sold by the slice; it is by whole pies only. They are also small pies, and I don't think plain ones exist - just sets of toppings, and none of them really seem safe... Also, they don't have much or any sauce, mostly or just cheese.
* There's nutrition info on packaged things, it might just be kind of weird - for example, on a packet of nuts rather than giving straight caloric information, it gave grams of the package and then the percentages of the package (0.5% honey, 16% almonds, 13% peanuts, etc.)
* Gram information is given a lot.
Japan: (Central Tokyo special wards, mostly)
* Biking is much more common here.
* People are, again, typically skinny to average.
* I didn't get comments on my appearance, really. However, at a cultural experience kimono thing, the teacher recommended an antique kimono for me because "You are short, and many other places do not have these kimonos, or if they do people cannot wear them because Japanese girls are getting taller so they cannot wear", and then later added on in a more quiet tone that "I recommended this kimono for you because you are small and can wear it, and people who are bigger, more you know... Ah... ^fatter ... cannot really wear antique kimono", so... Maybe people would just be more passive aggressive/try to be more subtle about it while bringing it up still just as much? I dunno.
* Convenience store foods all had calorie counts! (Those buy-and-go lunches, fist rice, etc.)
* Other restaurants do not have calorie counts. (Didn't go to any fast food chains, so I don't know.)
* Portion sizes seem pretty much the same as a typical meal size from Panera or something to me, so I dunno (but again, didn't go to any fast food places).
* Takeshita-dori has a lot of places along the way to buy crepes, so be warned.
* The Mt. Fuji 5th bus station sells 50% snack gift box sets. The same applies to Nakamise-dori.
* Asakusa (at least the area we were in) is all restaurants...
Hopefully this is helpful to someone! Sorry if it's really unorganized/confusing.
Edit: Formatting, my apologies.
Edit 2: Added a little more information!
[Help] Prednisone
/u/Bad_idea_babe [5'7"| 189.8| 29.7| -14|F]
Created: Wed Aug 17 21:14:41 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4y9zim/prednisone/
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I start Prednisone tomorrow and I'm freaking out. I've been struggling to keep my intake under 2000 which is ridiculous since I'm aiming for 1000. I can't work out because I can't breathe and now I'm going to be on a drug that makes you crazy hungry. Has anyone else been on it and not gained a ton of weight?
On mobile, can't flair.
[Rant/Rave] Plateau is driving me insane
/u/cinamintoast [5'6" | 209 | 33.87 | -61 | F]
Created: Wed Aug 17 20:58:27 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4y9wp6/plateau_is_driving_me_insane/
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I've been stuck at the same fucking weight for 2 weeks despite fasting and restricting like crazy. I've been drinking water, tried "refeeding" (didn't binge, still stayed around maintenance) twice, even a night of drinking, which usually at least gets rid of some water weight for me, didn't do shit. I am still overweight and my period is not due, there's no reason I shouldn't be losing SOMETHING. This is making me feel insane and I kind of just want to kill myself.
[Tip] Panera pro tip
/u/negativeraisins [5'0" | 69 lb | 14.19 | -53 lb | FTM]
Created: Wed Aug 17 20:35:49 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4y9ssb/panera_pro_tip/
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All soups will come with a side of a piece of French baguette. It's free and they don't tell you. This might be obvious already to other people lmao, but I nearly freaked out when I saw it on the receipt.
I guess it doesn't really matter if you're on your own, but I was with my mother and my food intake is seriously starting to be monitored, so I would have been expected to eat it if I didn't hide it when she wasn't looking. And on the Panera website, it says a side portion of French Baguette is 180 calories, so... Letting you know.
[Rant/Rave] Holy-multiple-day-binges. I'm going to hop in the shower now.
/u/fckk [5'4| CW 120lbs | 20.60 | GW 115 | F]
Created: Wed Aug 17 20:23:59 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4y9qsb/holymultipledaybinges_im_going_to_hop_in_the/
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and clean myself from head to toe. I will be clean, smoothed, exfoliated and lotioned perfection. And everything will be okay. The stomach pain will decrease. I will feel fresh and new. A new start. This shower will pick me up, please.
Multiple day binges feel like a hopeless hell. I need to pull myself out of this. I neglect myself, my relationships, and my responsibilities when I spiral into this cycle of broken promises to self. It defeats and consumes me. It being food. I need to pull myself out of this. Food has a physical grasp on me and I become instinctual. Like a fucking dog. I need to gain control again. I need to feel human again. I'm in a daze.
I'm going to hop in the shower now.
[Thinspo] I have a new roommate, and she's the perfect reverse-thinspo.
/u/frustratedwithfat [F | 5'7" | SW 160, CW 136, GW 125, UGW 115 ]
Created: Wed Aug 17 20:18:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4y9psh/i_have_a_new_roommate_and_shes_the_perfect/
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Just moved into a room with a girl. She's my height, 5'7, but she's larger than I was when I was 160, and with thicker limbs. Maybe 185 or so?
She snores. Not a little snoring, but gasping, flapping back-sleeping snoring that is clearly echoing in her throat. She's constantly sweaty and winded. Her clothes are ill-fitting (I guess they don't make anything other than squarish, too-short t-shirts her size?). And every time I see her eat a meal, it's easy 1000cal+. Literally every. single. time. All of her foods get sour cream or mayonnaise or melting cheese, and I'll admit to splurging on those things a bit every once in a while... nope, a whole spread layer all over it. On every. single. dish.
I feel bad using her as reverse-thinspo and thinking this way, but it's so, so easy to put down my food when I look at her, and we live with some other guys- the idea of being thin and beautiful in comparison is so, so appealing. I'd just do anything to walk around in a sports bra and mini shorts, and I really think I can buckle down and get there and I'm excited... am I a bad person?
Side note: I've never posted here and I'm suuuuuuper nervous to do so please be kind if I screwed something up?
[Goal] I made the plunge and got a "normal" grocery haul
/u/kpatable [5'9" | 125.1 | 18.1/18.5 | -21.9 | F]
Created: Wed Aug 17 20:16:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4y9pfn/i_made_the_plunge_and_got_a_normal_grocery_haul/
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I'm aiming for 3 meals a day, 400-600 calories per meal. I bought ~5500 calories of food that I plan to make last 3 to 4 days. This is a huge step toward recovering, which is where I want to go. It's really scary, too. I've gained weight over the past few days, but I haven't checked how much. At the doc I was 127, so I guess I'll update my flair to that. I can stand that. I'm trying really hard to be ok with all this. And I'm trying not to feel awful for having a 600 cal dinner, even though that's what I'd planned. I'm trying to trust that I won't binge tomorrow. This is really fucking difficult.
[Help] Help finding no microwave/no fridge foods?
/u/boredzoi [5'10| 135 | 19.35 | -15lbs | F]
Created: Wed Aug 17 20:11:36 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4y9on3/help_finding_no_microwaveno_fridge_foods/
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Ok so I'm moving into my dorm a few days earlier than my roomies and I won't have access to a fridge or a microwave for 2 days. What are some small low-cal meals I can buy to eat?
I don't plan on eating a lot, i need to fix my binge cycle!! I'm going to try and be carb free if possible, and I'll be taking some adderall so my appetite will be shot. I just need something to keep me from passing out in the evening. Any ideas?
[Thinspo] Unexpected thinspo on Etsy
/u/_-TAWat-_ [5'3" | 31F | UGW 110.2#]
Created: Wed Aug 17 20:01:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4y9n06/unexpected_thinspo_on_etsy/
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I was browsing Etsy and came across [this listing](Https://www.etsy.com/listing/262238591/square-monogram-necklace-in-gold-rose) I absolutely admire this model's collar bones. I looked at the store, and omigoodness. Delicate and beautiful jewelery on equally delicate and beautiful collar bones! 😍
... okay, I may just sound like a creeper. Lol.
[Tip] Low calorie food alternatives!
/u/println-Hello_World [5'4 | 115.7 | 20.25 | 21.3 | F]
Created: Wed Aug 17 18:45:07 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4y99tw/low_calorie_food_alternatives/
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**GRAINS**
* Zoodles (zucchini noodles) -- *depending on thickness, texture, and sauce used they can be similar to regular noodles and still filling*
* Cauliflower pizza crust -- *cauliflower also makes delicious mashed "potatoes"*
* Thomas Light English Muffins -- *100 calories per muffin*
* Nature's Own Wheat Bread -- *100 calories per two slices*
* Mission Yellow Extra Thin Corn Tortillas -- *80 calories per two tortillas*
* Lettuce -- *use in place of taco shells or tortillas*
* Skinny Pop popcorn -- *39 calories per cup*
* Kernel Seasons popcorn seasoning -- *I personally like these over plain, air popped popcorn*
* Special K Chips -- *about 110 calories per 27 chips*
* Trader Joe's Pretzel Slims -- *110 calories per 23 pretzels*
**PROTEIN**
* Boullion cubes -- *5-30 calories per cube*
* Pistachios -- *200 calories per 62 pistachios*
* Pea butter -- *about 80 calories per one tablespoon; suggestion from /u/skinnydudeee
* Eggs -- *I like to make egg/lettuce/tomato sandwiches with eggs or egg whites, which are about 70 or 20 calories per, respectively*
**DAIRY**
* Skim milk -- *about 90 calories per cup*
* Almond milk -- *can be used as a coffee sweetener with about 60 calories per cup*
* Lite Mini Babybell cheeses -- *50 calories per Babybell*
* Lite Laughing Cow cheese wedges -- *up to 35 calories per wedge*
* Trader Joes Lite Mozarella Shredded Cheese -- *45 calories per 1/4 cup*
* Feta cheese -- *about 70 calories per one inch cube*
* Siggi's Non-Fat Yogurt -- *about 100 calories per container*
* Yo-Crunch Low-Fat Yogurt -- *about 120 calories per container*
* Chobami Simply 100 Greek Yogurt -- *100 calories per container*
* Cannon Light & Fit Yogurt -- *80 calories per container*
**DESSERTS**
* Halo Top -- *about 240 to 280 calories per pint*
* Outshine Popsicles -- *35 to 45 calories per popsicle*
* 100 Calorie Klondike Bars -- *100 calories per bar*
* Fiber One 90 Calorie Brownies -- *90 calories per brownie*
I'm sure there are so many things I missed, and you can add suggestions in the comments. This took me over an hour on mobile and I'm done, haha.
[Help] Does anybody know if court-ordered involuntary hospitalizations are on the public record in the U.S.?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Aug 17 18:33:29 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4y97qw/does_anybody_know_if_courtordered_involuntary/
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[deleted]
[Other] Hope this helps someone else just a little.
/u/littlelizard_ [5'7 | CW: 54.2 | GW: 52 | F]
Created: Wed Aug 17 18:23:13 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4y960h/hope_this_helps_someone_else_just_a_little/
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http://imgur.com/cnNHkiP
[Goal] Weighed at doctor's office, pleasantly surprised !
/u/silverturtle [5'2" | 114 | 21.6 | -16 | F/23]
Created: Wed Aug 17 17:47:56 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4y8zxl/weighed_at_doctors_office_pleasantly_surprised/
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I've been recent quite stressed out and therefore my eating and exercise habits have been absolutely horrendous. I haven't weighed myself in a while due to not wanting to know how badly I've messed up (ignorance is bliss, am I right!??!) so I had no idea where I was. BUT, when the time came during my appointment to get weighed, the nurse kept commenting on how tiny I was (yeah, right, but ok, slight confidence boost) and when the dead was done, she told me I was 114! Which is what I've been plateaued at for the last few months. Even though it's not close to my ultimate goal, I'm incredibly happy because my poor habits haven't totally fucked me up! I'd rather be at square 1 than even worse off. Minor victory!!! I just had to share because it completely threw me off guard in a really good way :)
[Thinspo] Reverse Thinspo at the zoo
/u/FaithHopeTrick [5'7 | CW 124 GW 119 |19.35 | -31lbs | F]
Created: Wed Aug 17 16:44:27 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4y8olk/reverse_thinspo_at_the_zoo/
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Just want to make clear before I start that I realise fat people are humans too and deserve respect/kindness as much as anyone does. I would NEVER be rude about anyone's weight IRL and I would never want to hurt anyone.
So I'm at the zoo this chilling on a bench while friends are looking at snakes (no thanks!) and I notice this morbidly obese woman. She was probably 5"9 and 400-450 lbs at least. I've never really looked at a morbidly obese person walk before. She walked like a toddler. She was incapable of taking a stride, rather she brought the back leg forward to just level with her front leg. Then paused for a second before moving one leg forward again and then pausing before bringing the other leg level. It wasn't even left then right it seemed random. Basically like when you watch a kid walk down the stairs and they have to put both feet on each step. Only it was flat grass and she was a grown up.
Then she reached the end of the grass where there was a very small curb drop down to the path (no more than 6 inches) she almost fell over stepping down this curb because obviously it isn't easy to balance weight like that.
I felt so sad after, being that big makes every single little thing difficult and probably painful too. Her quality of life must be pretty terrible. Any number of reasons could have caused her weight gain and I can't judge her for it. I can see how easy it is to slowly eat more and more and wake up one day realising you are huge. That is why I will calorie count and weigh myself forever. Even if I'm maintaining or trying to gain.
Anyway seeing her made me really want to take care of myself so I made sure to eat lots of veggies and fruit the last couple of days and am losing my weekend gains.
Just wanted to share my experience - I also may have been momentarily jealous of how lean and toned a gorilla looked but I gave myself a mental shake at that point, lmao.
[Rant/Rave] [RANT] I just want to cry until I die
/u/copofteashirt
Created: Wed Aug 17 16:41:03 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4y8nyq/rant_i_just_want_to_cry_until_i_die/
---
Again. I promised to myself I wouldn't destroy everything again, but I'm human and troubled.
A bit of background: I developed disordered eating habits about 2-3 years ago, that in the last ~12 months morphed into a full-fledged, untameable ED. At first I thought I was dealing with bulimia, but lately I realized but I'm just a "failed" anorexic. (I don't even know why I'm writing this)
I'm a male, unfortunately. Every day I dream of being more girly, but I'm trapped in this cadaver which is not mine. I need HRT but my family is quite transphobic and I'm only a 17-years-old kid who lives in a small, forlorn town in Switzerland.
To me, my ED is also a way to punish myself, destroy my body and deprive it of everything that makes it alive. I want to be skin and bones.
I'll never be what I want, for I'm mentally unstable.
Severe social anxiety, depression, loneliness and bleak...dreary...drab sadness, along with my insane obsession with food are the only things in my mind, tormenting with no truce.
Lately I've been restricting a lot (although I'm tall and I have kind of a "" fast metabolism ""), running every day and exercising, too, in order to gain some muscle mass that can help me burning more calories at rest...
This morning I reached my lowest weight (56kg, BMI ~17.1) and I was extremely happy.
I've just binged. Too many calories, I don't even want to know now. Junk food. Sugar. Unhealthy shit. High glycemic index. Empty calories.
FUCK
I don't even know what I'm doing anymore.
I fail at everything I do.
EDIT: on a side note, I'm vegan, yet I ate some dairy, too.
It's all just an illusion. I'm not in control. At all. Food, and anxiety, and obsessive thoughts reign over me. Bloody hell!
[Rant/Rave] My anxiety is ruining me right now so I'm just here for sanity :~)
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Aug 17 16:31:22 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4y8m8x/my_anxiety_is_ruining_me_right_now_so_im_just/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] Home with family
/u/zomboooo [5'7|115|18.1|-2|NB]
Created: Wed Aug 17 16:25:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4y8l8v/home_with_family/
---
So I'm home visiting my family until next Tuesday. I've been here since the 10th and I've basically binged every single day since. It's hard to reject your favorite foods in a family that says I love you with food. Plus they've known about my ED for a year now and my parents have both threatened me with forced hospitalization through a court order.
So I think I've just decided to keep acting "normal" until next Monday when I leave back to school. Plus it'll be easier for me once I get back since I'll be able to have control over what I eat since it'll be whatever I buy in the dorm rather than how currently my mom buys food for my siblings aka three teenagers.
However, I will still be walking my usual 8-9 miles a day. So hopefully that will maybe help?
Idk. I kinda just wanted to write this out to people who kinda understand. It's funny, even though I know I'm anorexic, I don't feel like I truly am because of how shitty I've eaten this week. I hate summer and being home. I can't wait to return to the safety of my dorm.
Also if you have any advice or kind, reassuring words, they are appreciated immensely!!!
[Help] Mother is a registered dietitian
/u/icantstopmeloning [5'5" | ~100lbs | 17.1 | ~-40 | F]
Created: Wed Aug 17 15:58:14 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4y8g2w/mother_is_a_registered_dietitian/
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So my mom has witnessed me eating mainly only vegetables for the past few months - and I'm assuming she knows I have some sort of disordered eating, but doesnt know the extent of it actually being anorexia. It angers me that she didnt say anything until now because it feels like she doesn't care and it just reaffirms the fact that my relationship with her is shit and I feel like everything including weight/looks is a competition with her.
Anyways, she approached me the other day (finally) and told me that I need to gain weight and that Ive lost too much. I'm 5'5 and she said I'm around 100 pounds... The thing is, I don't weigh myself and haven't since high school because I get obsessive with numbers but she is saying I need to go out and buy a scale and start weighing myself so that I don't lose anymore weight.
BUT I DUN WANNA :( i feel like it would make the anorexia way more obsessive and I just don't want to know how much I weigh, Id rather just be skinny and happy like I am right now. Part of me doest want to wither away - my depression does want that though - and part of me does. And part of me wants to maintain but thats super scary. I feel most comfortable without knowing my weight and continuing to lose.
Should I or should I not buy a scale? Do any of you guys get by without weighing yourself?
[Tip] Go-to Dessert
/u/Alexa1p [5'5'' | 110 | 18 | -10.7 | F]
Created: Wed Aug 17 15:53:12 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4y8f3r/goto_dessert/
---
This might sound gross but I just poured peach sparkling water into a bowl full of vanilla halo top & it's the best thing right now. It tastes like peach halo top, oh my god.
[Rant/Rave] I think Killstar does vanity sizing :/
/u/boneobsessed [5'4" | Sw 173lbs | Cw 158.2lbs | -14 lbs | Gw 95lbs | F]
Created: Wed Aug 17 15:39:39 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4y8cht/i_think_killstar_does_vanity_sizing/
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I'm definitely not skinny by any means (5'4" 159 lbs) and their bodysuit in a size small fit my body! I bought it for when I'm thinner in the future and now I'm kind of disappointed. Some of the other items I have are more accurate in sizing (dresses, sweaters) but I'm sad because I know that eventually this won't fit me. I can post pictures if you guys want, it'll kind of be reverse thinspo too haha.
[Help] Weight of Canned foods
/u/concuidado [4'11 | 89 lbs | 19.21 | -51| F]
Created: Wed Aug 17 15:28:56 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4y8ads/weight_of_canned_foods/
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Everyday I usually have a little bit of canned (in water) tuna or chicken breast. I drain the can and then use the meat inside for the next couple of days. I weigh it every time but sometimes it doesn't last me as long as it should. I opened a canned chicken breasts and it said 7 serving and it's been 3 days and I havent used the full serving size on most days but there is probably only 1 1/2 servings left. Does this happen to anyone else? Is it more possible that there were only 5 servings or that I overate (even though I weighed it)? Is my scale off?
[Other] Huge Binge Fuck Up
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Aug 17 15:19:31 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4y88j5/huge_binge_fuck_up/
---
[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] I think I'm in deeper than I'd realized.
/u/mindgamesbodygames [5'4'' | going down]
Created: Wed Aug 17 15:13:48 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4y87cm/i_think_im_in_deeper_than_id_realized/
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Woke up exhausted.
Stepped on the scale.
Down in weight - anxiety that it's not real.
Hobbled to the gym.
Burned 500 cals - anxiety that my fitbit is wrong.
Hobbled through work.
Decided to "refeed" and hit 1200 for intake - anxiety in general.
Went to favourite little eatery.
Planned the meal.
Total intake for the day would be ~1081 - anxiety, too much.
Meal came.
Ate half - anxiety.
Logged the full meal.
Tea at starbucks.
Added some milk - anxiety that there was too much.
Reading about osmolarity for school - anxious that caffeine in tea will cause water retention.
Damn, how did I get here?
First Big Binge In Nearly A Year
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Aug 17 15:01:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4y84v3/first_big_binge_in_nearly_a_year/
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[deleted]
[Other] I guess this is my official goodbye?
/u/noodleworld [5'6" | CW 113.9 GW 110 | BMI 18.5 | F]
Created: Wed Aug 17 14:55:45 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4y83oy/i_guess_this_is_my_official_goodbye/
---
Hi friends. I haven't posted here in a while. During that time, I made myself sick again via ED, just like I did last time I got into restricting, and a switch in my brain kinda flipped. It was like I suddenly realized "I'm already thin, I don't need to lose. I don't have to make myself miserable like this. And I may be hurting my thyroid." I spent 4 days eating normally (for my metabolism), and actually dropped a pound of fat (pretty sure it's not water because I'm bloated af from shark week, which finally happened 2 weeks late after I ate normally). I think I'm going to go back to just eating however much I want, and focusing more on exercise to build muscle (like I've said before, my only body issue was how skinnyfat I was).
You all have been amazing and supportive, and I'm happy for the time I spent here. Stay safe and keep on keeping on :)
[Rant/Rave] Damn you tofu serving sizes
/u/apricaught [5'3.5"| 116.2| 20.88| -16| F]
Created: Wed Aug 17 14:22:18 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4y7wrn/damn_you_tofu_serving_sizes/
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Wtf is this "2.5 servings per box" shit? You think I want to do that math to calculate the total in the package and then divide it into 3 or 4? I can't cut something into "two point fifths" easily and I have no food scale! And it's like every single tofu package does this.
Not actually a problem, I was just miffed(read: hangry) that I had to do an extra step making lunch :P I know we all have gotten a lot better at math.
[Rant/Rave] Feeling lost
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Aug 17 13:58:00 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4y7rur/feeling_lost/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] Struggling to hit 700 calories a day.
/u/KillingKylie [5'5| Piggy|-25|F|GW: 97]
Created: Wed Aug 17 13:09:37 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4y7hxy/struggling_to_hit_700_calories_a_day/
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So. I tried to commit suicide and like the idiot I am pussied out and texted my fiancés brother. (I don't have family so they are pretty much like family.)
Anyway, he convinced me I should maybe go get help for being a nutball; so I went to see my primary doctor to get a referral for a therapist. Long story short they pushed me ahead and got me in the next day.
They found about my restriction and exercise habits thanks to my loud mouth fiance. I am trying to stay around 700 cals a day so I don't lose too fast and bring more attention (I exercise 5x a week for 1-2 hours and have an active job.) but I keep accidently fasting or hovering around 500 cals.
Any advice for how to get a couple hundred extra cals in a day without feeling to full? (I hate feeling full)
[Rant/Rave] Don't want to recover any more
/u/BluestNovember [5'4" | SW: 200+ lbs | CW: too high | BMI: over 30 | -20lbs | F]
Created: Wed Aug 17 13:08:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4y7hqp/dont_want_to_recover_any_more/
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I'm so sick of trying to be okay with my body as it is. Whenever I'm triggered, I just want to scream at people, "I'm obese, motherfuckers, don't try to tell me an obese person can be beautiful and wanted and loved." I can't be. Not at this way. I've found control in the Keto Diet (20lb down), but everything in my life is shitty. Life is NOT okay. If I could just be thin enough, I could be loved and treated decently by the people around me and have a fair chance at life.
I was triggered really badly on Monday when my roommate's cat knocked a cup of coffee over onto my keyboard, and my narcissistic mother made it worse while I was getting my gel nails removed. She and my father kept on calling me, but I had my fingers in acetone and couldn't get them out, but the manicurist helped me, and they were so pissy with me. But, they had an extra keyboard. I went over to their house, and they were highly frustrated too. I went to talk to Mom while she was rooting around in her freezer for frozen veggies for me (the dumbass can't understand that I can't eat more than 5g of carbs a meal according the Keto Diet) and I couldn't understand what she was saying. She turned around and swung a bag of frozen veggies in my face, almost hitting me, and then started laughing when I burst into tears (because she hits me on a regular basis when she's feeling shitty). And when I told her I was pretty upset and frustrated, she said, "well, your father's frustration is worse." Excuse me, bitch, it's not a competition!
All this combined with trying to get an insurance sale license and a malfunctioning computer... ugh! It's all just too much. I can control my food, but not my life. NOTHING is going my way right now, it feels. Last night, I decided trying to recover is not worth it any more for me. I'm fucking tired of trying to be fat-positive. I can't, any longer.
[Goal] I'm upping my daily cals
/u/AmAlreadyGoingToHell
Created: Wed Aug 17 12:56:16 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4y7f49/im_upping_my_daily_cals/
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I do so well for days, but I seem to binge once a week. It's gonna be a test to seem if it helps prevent that binge. Upping from 500 to 900.. Should still loose as a 5"8 active female, I hope
[Meme/Humor] TOTALLY NOT OBVIOUS
/u/goddamnroommate [5'6" | 143.1 | 23.17 | -50ish | F]
Created: Wed Aug 17 12:14:03 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4y76iy/totally_not_obvious/
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http://imgur.com/5ILi1Co
[Goal] After a month of binging here I am (hopefully staying back on track)
/u/tokkibun
Created: Wed Aug 17 11:48:35 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4y717j/after_a_month_of_binging_here_i_am_hopefully/
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The past month has been horrible- I've been binging nonstop and gained 10 (ugh) pounds when I was super close to my GW. But the past two days have been better and I'm getting back on track finally!! Here's me today @ 118 (double ugh) @ 5'7 1/2. I found this skirt under a pile of my clothes and it's making me feel a lil better about my body today.
https://imgur.com/a/zhnvc
[Goal] Beginning to maintain
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Aug 17 11:43:48 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4y7076/beginning_to_maintain/
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[deleted]
[Goal] Been craving PB&J. Feeling in control with scraping out most of the insides.
/u/gastastic [5'1 | 123 | 26F]
Created: Wed Aug 17 11:42:31 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4y6zx9/been_craving_pbj_feeling_in_control_with_scraping/
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http://imgur.com/8Yrrb40
[Rant/Rave] Holy shit fasting is amazing....
/u/Thunder2WonderThighs
Created: Wed Aug 17 10:31:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4y6l1q/holy_shit_fasting_is_amazing/
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I've been struggling to start restricting again, every day I'd start out great and end up bingeing by the end of it. After eating an entire baguette in bed, I decided enough was enough.
I fasted for 3 days and holy shit...I think I've found my new plan! I thought I'd be passing out and unable to do anything but I went Pokemon Go hunting, swimming AND played at a trampoline park while fasting. I lost 5 lbs and they've stayed off even after I started eating again! :-D
I'm going to try fasting at least 2 days in a row every week. It kills my sugar cravings and makes it easier to restrict the rest of the week.
Regular fasters out there, how often do you fast?
[Rant/Rave] I felt the need to post it here, I apologize if you find it depressing...
/u/TemporaryAccount_101 [5'3'' | AHAHAH | -5.5kgs | 18F]
Created: Wed Aug 17 10:18:38 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4y6if5/i_felt_the_need_to_post_it_here_i_apologize_if/
---
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LkfM-UK5BgM
[Discussion] Daily Food Diary! August 17, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Wed Aug 17 10:02:32 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4y6f1e/daily_food_diary_august_17_2016/
---
This is a daily food diary thread for August 17, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
[Discussion] Are eating disorders really ego disorders?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Aug 17 10:00:53 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4y6eow/are_eating_disorders_really_ego_disorders/
---
A psychological diatribe here to follow. Thoughts and input appreciated.
I was a fat kid until i was 14. I got teased about in school and felt horrible. So i became anorexic and starved myself (ego reaction to external input). When i got older i realized that by doing so i had forestalled puberty. I got told i looked really young and once i made the connection between starving and that, i overate and became almost chubby again (ego reaction to external input). I now find myself in a place of reflection where i still have anorexic tendencies but am realizing that the key is to reject ego and just BE (easier said than done to the ED conditioned mind). Thoughts?
BTW the image below is me, the face of a ED-cursed young man and former anorexic who is now starting to starve himself again. Take a guess at my age, you will be wrong :D
http://i.imgur.com/KbgfeyN.jpg
[Discussion] What's your favorite ED related song?
/u/TeaCupGirl [5'8" | CW 124.8lbs | 19 | -15.2lbs |]
Created: Wed Aug 17 08:27:38 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4y5vcm/whats_your_favorite_ed_related_song/
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There's quite a few of them, though some of them are kind of... Not great. What's everyone's favorite? It doesn't necessarily have to be "about" eating disorders, if it makes you think of yours that's fine.
I'd say mine is "Big Isn't Beautiful" by King Adora. mostly because it's the kind of song I'd like anyways.
[Other] I'm excited for fall outfits! (featuring a 15cal mocha Americano)
/u/ifuckpineapples [5'3" | 95.6 | 17.4 | -10lbs |F]
Created: Wed Aug 17 06:27:31 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4y59uy/im_excited_for_fall_outfits_featuring_a_15cal/
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http://i.imgur.com/dEtEw4u.jpg
[Help] Ephedrine in Vietnam?
/u/vnthrow33
Created: Wed Aug 17 06:10:25 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4y575n/ephedrine_in_vietnam/
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So I'm living abroad for a year and I'm a little desperate. I think it's contraband here, but is there something comparable to Bronkaid here?
[Discussion] Way To Go Wednesday August 17, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Wed Aug 17 06:03:05 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4y55zh/way_to_go_wednesday_august_17_2016/
---
This is the weekly achievement thread for August 17, 2016.
This weekly thread is to spotlight those achievements you feel don't necessarily warrant their own post, but you'd like to celebrate all the same. This is not limited to specifically ED-related goals; share anything you are happy about having done or accomplished recently!
^Achievement ^threads ^are ^posted ^every ^Wednesday.
^Have ^any ^questions ^or ^concerns? ^Comment ^below, ^or [^PM ^the ^mods.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FproED)
Ana Navarro tears into CNN spokes-apologist Lewandowski for defending Trump’s ‘insulting’ racism
/u/Sethshostak
Created: Wed Aug 17 05:33:28 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4y51wk/ana_navarro_tears_into_cnn_spokesapologist/
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http://www.rawstory.com/2016/08/anna-navarro-tears-into-cnn-spokes-apologist-lewandowski-for-defending-trumps-insulting-racism/
[Discussion] SPILL! Coffee choices? [discussion]
/u/bloodyunderwear [5'4" | 119 | 20.4 | -0 | 20F]
Created: Wed Aug 17 05:19:00 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4y4zz9/spill_coffee_choices_discussion/
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so friends, I've recently been able to start drinking coffee! Some meds would make me SUPER anxious when combined with coffee (but not tea...??) but I've stopped taking them and am now plowing through 4-5 cups a day.
A couple online sources say that 3-5 cups aren't harmful, but I've found myself craving it far more than that! And beyond the caffeine content, I'm worried about how much milk I've been putting in, since I generally consider hot drinks to be safe (I'm from a tea family).
I usually make about 12oz of coffee from espresso powder the night before, then toss it in the fridge until the morning, when I mix it with ice and (god idk) maybe 1/2c of milk?? The key step is the sugarfree vanilla syrup I bought on amazon! Looking this over, I'm definitely going to leave out more of the milk.
How much coffee do you drink? AND how do you drink it?
[Rant/Rave] Ok no I seriously seemingly didn't put any weight on during my binge week and I am confused as heck.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Aug 17 03:31:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4y4o3o/ok_no_i_seriously_seemingly_didnt_put_any_weight/
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[deleted]
[Help] (TMI??) 2am, terrible UTI, all I can think about is...
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Aug 17 03:13:42 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4y4ma7/tmi_2am_terrible_uti_all_i_can_think_about_is/
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[deleted]
[Discussion] Spidey Senses
/u/GoalsandGossip [5'10" | CW 181.4 | BMI 26 | GW 175 | UGW 125 | F |]
Created: Wed Aug 17 03:08:38 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4y4lt6/spidey_senses/
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I don't know how to flair posts on the app and I'm not even sure if this is allowed here so if this needs deleted please know that I understand.
So does anyone else here have a tendency to know stuff before someone tells you? My bf is kind of really just blah. Not affectionate not abusive. Just blah. I know part of it is because I got so fat that he's not attracted to me anymore but also because he's an idiot.
I've been making bets with myself all week about him. The other day when he was ignoring me while on his phone. I was like "I'd bet anything that's his ex he's talking to" a quick glance over with her profile pulled up on my phone showed the profile pics matched. Today I'm like "I'd bet anything that he's being vague about work tonight because he quit early and got a beer" he gets home and keeps repeating the same vague things about work, I say I want a diet coke and some smokes so i can go or he can. He says he'll go. I say get yourself a beer. He says "it's too late to buy a beer but I already had one".
Maybe I'm just crazy and making lucky guesses but either way, anyone else do this? Especially when you're feeling down or crappy?
[Rant/Rave] I was fat before so it's okay..?
/u/commtra [5'7 | GW:110 | -11 | F]
Created: Wed Aug 17 02:47:00 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4y4jpl/i_was_fat_before_so_its_okay/
---
Just kinda annoyed at how people are praising my "healthy" living and my "amazing" transformation.
My mum sometimes buys me groceries and it's always vegetables and oat waffles and other super low cal carb free sugar free shit. Thanks for feeding my ED.
She always thought I was too fat because I was 5'6 and 130 pounds when she is 5'3 and 100 pounds.
She also spent my whole childhood thinking she
was fat and constantly dieting and forcing me to diet with her.
I get so annoyed when I think about it. I was never allowed any fizzy drinks or chips, had McDonald's maybe twice a year and the first time I had pizza I was 14.
I still love her but I mean... thanks for forcing me to diet my whole life and still implying I was fat.
I'm so scared it's never going to end, I don't know what a different life looks like. Confident people must have such great lives lol
[Help] Is a calorie just a calorie? I don't know what nutrition resources to trust.
/u/FakingReallyWell [5'5.5" | 134 lbs | 22.1 | -22 lbs | F]
Created: Wed Aug 17 00:32:17 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4y45gd/is_a_calorie_just_a_calorie_i_dont_know_what/
---
So, I have binged the last couple of days. I haven't been ridiculous, but it's been over 2200kcal in one go.
These binges are different from my old binges though. Instead of chocolate, cakes, cheese and bread, I've eaten fruit, salad, loads of protein (e.g. quorn, eggs) and rice cakes.
If I eat 2000 kcal of this 'healthy' food, will I gain less weight compared to my old junk food binges even if the calorie count is the same? I believe that the calorie count is the net energy your body can actually get out of the food, it takes into account the fact that protein takes more energy to process etc., so it shouldn't make any difference what I eat, right?
Googling it gives me random blogs and I don't really trust them. Most of them say it's healthier because it has nutrients and the food is less processed etc. but I don't care about that. I only care about the number on the scale.
You guys all seem to know a tonne about nutrition. Where do you get your info from?
[Rant/Rave] I am afraid to get help for my other mental issues because I don't want anyone to know about my ED.
/u/Para-Medic [5'1' | too much | too much |0 | F]
Created: Tue Aug 16 23:36:01 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4y3zat/i_am_afraid_to_get_help_for_my_other_mental/
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I had a major breakdown this weekend. A mess I don't want to recount anymore. I have been in a fog for the past few days. I am functioning, but I don't want to move anymore. I don't want to smile, I don't want to laugh, I don't care anymore. I am finally feeling my bones again and this is the only thing that brings me any peace. It doesn't make me happy, it just makes me breathe a sigh of relief. I am dizzy and I love it. I don't want to be fixed. I am so empty, but I don't care. I will work, I will love my kids, I will try to be normal. All I can think about is being skinny. Food is just a reflex now. I eat because I am supposed to, but I can go all day floating around in an empty bubble of nothing. No one notices, no one cares and I am okay with that. I will be thin one day and they will finally see me. I will be loved that day. I can't tell if I am clear for the first time in years or if I'm really gone this time. As long as I continue doing my job, making money for my children, keep them happy and healthy, nothing else matters.
[Tip] I pop pills to suppress appetite
/u/Alexa1p [5'5'' | 110 | 18 | -10.7 | F]
Created: Tue Aug 16 23:10:10 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4y3w71/i_pop_pills_to_suppress_appetite/
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Not like, drugs or anything. Vitamins!
my stomach is really sensitive to swallowing pills, and if i take an iron supplement, and biotin, and then vitamin B, and fish oil, my tummy is upset and food becomes vaguely nauseating to me.
[Rant/Rave] i'm such a failure
/u/trashmousey [5'5 | too fucking fat | -20 lbs | 19/F]
Created: Tue Aug 16 22:37:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4y3s4s/im_such_a_failure/
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i fucking hate myself right now. today was a horrible binge day for me and i feel disgusting. i have literally no self control so whenever i get it in my mind something that i want to eat i can't stop it.
i've only lost 20 lbs this summer and i look literally exactly the same. i really wanted to lose more so that i could go back to class and see the guy that i liked last semester and he could see how much better i looked. but no, i'm too stupid to even do that right. i need to lose at least 30 more pounds but i don't have time because i was so fucking lazy and didn't think about what might happen.
i'm fucking covered in blubber. i wish i could cut it all off with a rusty hacksaw. maybe then i wouldn't be so goddamn repulsive.
[Discussion] Thoughts on Freelee?
/u/beautyandbeast5 [5'2 | 123.5lb | 22.6 | 42lb | F]
Created: Tue Aug 16 21:48:26 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4y3ljp/thoughts_on_freelee/
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Flair as discussion please :)
Are there any fans here? I don't get how she can eat soooo much and stay so skinny. I don't really care about all the drama, but I'm just curious how she's processing those gazillion calories and not getting sick/fat. Any theories? The closest I can get is the mono diet but I wanted to know what others think.
[Goal] Hit a Goal today, then binged it away
/u/OtterKat [5'5" | 115lbs | 19 | -5lbs | F]
Created: Tue Aug 16 21:02:45 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4y3f8o/hit_a_goal_today_then_binged_it_away/
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I hit 116 (my flair is not correct) this morning and as a reward I treated myself to breakfast. Then lunch. Then dinner. And then binge food. I'm sort of frustrated with myself because I ruined the happiness of reaching a goal but then destroyed it by binging.
But, for the first time in a while, my stomach feels flat when I lie down again, which is nice. I have a while to go, but it is encouraging to reach a relative low again. Yay, I guess?
But let me just say real quick how much I appreciate this sub and everyone here. I love you guys and the support you give everyone, esp a lurker like me. Its really great to be able to tell someone that I lost weight without hearing the "OMGBUHYOURESOSKINNY" lecture. Just, thanks.
[Rant/Rave] When people unknowingly encourage your ED
/u/println-Hello_World [5'4 | 115.7 | 20.25 | 21.3 | F]
Created: Tue Aug 16 20:22:59 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4y39n8/when_people_unknowingly_encourage_your_ed/
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My dad bought my favorite gum (Orbit sweet mint), and I decided to have two pieces rather than have dinner. Even though packages can lie and I'm probably having twenty calories worth, the flavor lasts a long time, and twenty calories is better than the 210 I saved for dinner.
[Rant/Rave] Stopped myself from ruining my night even further but still feel poopy
/u/efflorescence-n [5'10 l F l 🌸💖✨]
Created: Tue Aug 16 19:31:04 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4y31zn/stopped_myself_from_ruining_my_night_even_further/
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And I still feel sad. I've been craving pizza so much lately and I already had a lot to eat today so I figured might as well go get two slices, enjoy them (but really feel like shit as I scarf them down) and then fast until Saturday (aka fail at fasting). I literally debated with myself and got my dad involved as to whether or not I should go and I only stopped after seeing my reflection in the lobby doors of my building and being displeased with what I saw and how I'm slowing down my progress. I still want to go get it but I know I'll feel worse after. I literally hate food!!!!!! but I also struggle with stopping myself from eating it?? My logic is on par clearly. I feel so fucking weak all the time because I suck at restricting and I want nothing more than to restrict better and be lighter and smaller, and I compensate my eating by walking/running a lot but then I'm hungry again :((((
Sidenote: Do you guys think about food a lot? It's probably an obvious question, but it's literally the one thing that consumes (pun not intended) my thoughts all the time. Like I was at a concert this past weekend, and I love the singer she's one of my favorites and I love her songs a lot and it was so great and I was enjoying everything so much, but I also I felt terrible the whole time because I couldn't wait till it ended so I could just go home and eat........ Anything I do, whether it be hanging out with friends or even being at work, I'm only waiting until I can finally eat again like wtf???? It's so pathetic but my whole day revolves around planning to eat or what I can eat or how much I have to restrict the next few days to stay under my weekly goal. Sorry, I just don't know who to talk to about this and you guys are always supportive <333 I'm just so tired of not having a 'perfect streak' and I really hope tomorrow will be a better day and I can get myself in order before school starts.
EC stacks questions
/u/Hi_ilikerocks
Created: Tue Aug 16 18:46:19 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4y2vdq/ec_stacks_questions/
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I want to start doing EC stacks, I live in Pennsylvania, what drugs sold in PA contain ephedrine? Or what hoops do I need to jump through to get it? I'm pretty sure Brokaid isn't sold anywhere around where I live. Plus I nfo online is pretty inconclusive. Thanks for any replies :)
[Discussion] Realized I grew another inch. Suddenly I'm underweight, but I do not feel thin at all?
/u/waitbutwbu [5'6.5" | 112.2 | BMI: 17.84 | F]
Created: Tue Aug 16 18:08:12 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4y2pqv/realized_i_grew_another_inch_suddenly_im/
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Soo... I just weighed in at 114.1 this morning. Decided to see how tall I was, thinking maybe I grew a tiny bit in the ~6months I haven't measured. Nope, I am 5'6, putting me at a BMI of 18.14. Making me underweight.
Being underweight has always been a goal of mine. I thought being underweight would ~magically~ make me look thin and beautiful. But a look in the mirror confirms that I am the same ugly, fat mess as always. I do not have BD so the mirror does not lie to me.
Has anyone else experienced this? Reached a goal and thought, *hey, I'm still fat here... what did I expect?* What did you do?
[Help] Confused. 48 hours of non-stop panic attacks. Lost 3 lbs over those two days.
/u/realbutterflybaby [5'1" | CW: 105±1 GW: 88±1 | -26 lbs | F]
Created: Tue Aug 16 18:07:28 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4y2pmr/confused_48_hours_of_nonstop_panic_attacks_lost_3/
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I didn't sleep for 3 nights. My anxiety was so high I couldn't eat. The smell of food made me nauseated. I was literally shaking, crying, and getting the worst hotflash-delirious panic attacks over and over for two days. Somehow amid all of that, I was motivated enough to check my weight, which is when I noticed something weird.
I took a step on my scale and saw on the first day that my weight dropped from 108 to 104. I was like, no. That's ridiculous. Then stumbled over to the phone to have another triggering phone call and started panicking all over again. Before crying myself to sleep, I walked by my scale and thought to check again: 104.3 lbs. Still doesn't make sense.
Then today, after I'd had my issues somewhat resolved and went to the doctor, I was forced to eat. It was physically difficult. I had a cookie and started hiccuping immediately; chewing and walking around the pharmacy trying to pick up my prescription made me feel so faint. Eating the subway I got afterwards was PHYSICALLY difficult. I had to take breaks between bites because I was so tired. I felt crazy.
When I got home, my friends had pizza and made me have a couple slices + chocolate chip cookies that they know are my favorite since they knew I was having a hard time. After they left and the binge was over, I put my hands on my bloated stomach and waddled over to my scale. It read I was at 105.2 I really don't understand this.
Did I actually lose 3 lbs over 2 days? Not even restricting and exercising made me lose weight that fast. Before this, the fastest I'd ever lost weight was 1 lb every 2 days. I wouldn't wish what I went through on my worst enemy, even if it was what caused me to lose the weight so fast. I'm just confused and unsure if what I'm reading is even real.
[Discussion] Ephedrine side effects? Excessive sweating?
/u/Andersoncooperspenis [5'6 | 176 | 26.63 | -10 | F]
Created: Tue Aug 16 17:25:43 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4y2j2a/ephedrine_side_effects_excessive_sweating/
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I've been doing an EC stack for about 3 days, and I can deal with the minor jittery-ness and uppity feeling ephedrine gives me, but today after walking home for ten minutes I realized I was literally dripping sweat. It was disgusting. And it's only about 20 degrees here too? I know sweating in the summer is one thing, but this was just too much. No amount of primer and setting spray could keep my makeup on. Anyone else experience anything similar? I honestly can not deal with seeing people when I'm this sweaty.
Oh, and since I'm in Canada ephedrine only comes in 8mg tablets, so I've been taking about two a day so far.
[Rant/Rave] I just ordered an XL pizza
/u/strongerthanyouknow [5'5" |145 |24.4 | -12 | F]
Created: Tue Aug 16 17:18:03 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4y2hu5/i_just_ordered_an_xl_pizza/
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At first I was happy as hell! I was all "Yay! fuck the 5 pounds i've already gained from bingeing! Fuck all i'm going to enjoy this."
This is /r/proED. We're supportive of BED, not just AN and BPD. I was hoping for some "YEAH! Enjoy that pizza! It's whatever! Tomorrow is a new day!"
Now i'm afraid for it to arrive. I'm so nervous I could cry. Over pizza. I can't believe I just dropped $20 on hating myself. I'm going to eat this damn thing too. Not c/s, not purge, i'm going to eat it.
Hold me.
EDIT: Pizza just got here. At the same time as I finished a stressful phone call with my mom.
Pizza is delicious, eating and drinking beer with awesome boyfriend. Wish I could just enjoy this without the nagging guilt.
<3
[Discussion] Hoorah for auto-immune diseases!
/u/capture_the_excite [164cm | 55kg | 20.4 | F]
Created: Tue Aug 16 17:04:24 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4y2fi1/hoorah_for_autoimmune_diseases/
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I've always been naturally averse to tomato. It wasn't until recently that I learned it was tomato products (and a bunch of other foods, but that's not the point) have been making me ill.
No pizza, no spaghetti, no calzones, no fries with ketchup, no salsa, no cherry tomatoes in my salad. No pain.
It's like my body is doing all the restricting for me lol.
[Rant/Rave] Fuck my measurements and fuck sewing
/u/Missy_Is_Bitter [5'3"| Faaaaaaaaaaat | -23lbs | F]
Created: Tue Aug 16 15:14:43 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4y1wfx/fuck_my_measurements_and_fuck_sewing/
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I just found out that we got media passes to a convention Labor Day weekend. Which is awesome because yay free con passes and getting to interview cool people.
But it also means that the costume I designed now needs to be done like three weeks earlier than I anticipated. And it means that I've got to measure myself now. And measure out the pattern and I was super not emotionally ready to look at my measurements because they are gross and I am fucking huge. And now I have to deal with cutting out huge swaths of fabric to cover my fucking enormous body. And adjusting my mannequin so that I can drape everything. And just... Ugh. Not ready for this. Like at all. I'm probably going to wear a corset under it so that my flabby fucking stomach doesn't ruin everything. And I'm going to fast for the rest of this week to try and get down as small as I can before the con.
At least the fabric I bought is pretty. And I can totally make it smaller when I lose more weight.
(Sorry I'm super talkative today)
[Rant/Rave] Boyfriend's ex is so bloody thin. Anyone else have similar paranoia about their partner's ex?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Aug 16 14:07:18 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4y1k3t/boyfriends_ex_is_so_bloody_thin_anyone_else_have/
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[removed]
[Rant/Rave] When you do all in your power to enjoy a meal with friends and they cancel
/u/yummmies [5'4" | 130 | -35 | F]
Created: Tue Aug 16 14:05:12 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4y1jns/when_you_do_all_in_your_power_to_enjoy_a_meal/
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I ate way less than usual and exercised and EC stacked so I could enjoy a meal with you without worry and *you canceled*. Goddamnit.
[Other] I'm out
/u/Saltycook [5'4"| 128# |22.4| -35# | Female]
Created: Tue Aug 16 13:43:38 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4y1fkt/im_out/
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Thanks for your support, I wish you well
Me irl
/u/mermaid_puppy [5'11" | 137lb | UGW 115 | F]
Created: Tue Aug 16 13:22:44 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4y1bov/me_irl/
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http://i.imgur.com/wDn4OdG.jpg
[Intro] I never thought it would be me. I had the signs but i didnt pay attention.
/u/lovemyfragilebones [5'2" | 105 | 19.2/19.89 | -5 | gq 19]
Created: Tue Aug 16 13:10:51 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4y19g9/i_never_thought_it_would_be_me_i_had_the_signs/
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I'm out on a walk. Stopped to rest because it's hotter than hell.
My girlfriend has anorexia. I worry about her all the time.
When i was in middle school i watched one of the teachers get tinier and tinier until one day i came to school and we were told her eating disorder had killed her.
I have an acquaintance who battled anorexia for four years and is in recovery.
I've always had issues with food, always. I've always been insecure about my body. In high school I started exercising more and eating less and i didn't really think about it. I didn't want to admit to myself how i wanted to whittle my body down to nothing and disappear.
I used to punish myself by not eating, or eating unappetizing things. My parents were emotionally abusive; i realize now that my begging to be sent to bed without dinner as punishment was born of a desire to validate and externalize internal anguish.
It's strange how i know where it comes from for me, i can feel it getting worse, i literally watched a person starve themself to death, and yet- it doesn't worry me. On some level i want to be thin and perfect. On some level its self-harm and suicidal ideation. On some level it's a desire to be validated, to be seen to be in pain. On some level it's ingrained into the core of my being that this is what i deserve. But it doesn't worry me. It just feels like i'm finally slipping into a place i should have let myself find a long time ago.
I'm not even sure which flair is appropriate for this, or why exactly im typing it. Just a thought, i guess.
Edit: typos
[Tip] Sharing my favorite recipe when you have a sweet tooth
/u/mermaid_puppy [5'11" | 137lb | UGW 115 | F]
Created: Tue Aug 16 13:06:23 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4y18l4/sharing_my_favorite_recipe_when_you_have_a_sweet/
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Diet cream soda + vanilla halo top = satisfying float.
Seriously, the soda fills up your stomach so well with bubbles, and you all know the power of halo top.
[Discussion] Am I the only one who hates the smell/taste of bronkaid? (Tiny bit of TMI)
/u/Missy_Is_Bitter [5'3"| Faaaaaaaaaaat | -23lbs | F]
Created: Tue Aug 16 12:43:43 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4y13zb/am_i_the_only_one_who_hates_the_smelltaste_of/
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Seriously, it is beyond gross to me. Like I have to wash it down with a crap to. Of water or something with flavor or it makes me want to gag. And then I can't ever really get away from it when I'm fasting because my piss smells like it too. -_-
Does Primatine smell that way too, or is it more of a neutral scent? Because there's part of me that would probably consider switching to Primatine if it doesn't smell like this.
[Other] The danger of Quaker cheddar rice cakes
/u/mermaid_puppy [5'11" | 137lb | UGW 115 | F]
Created: Tue Aug 16 12:43:34 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4y13yb/the_danger_of_quaker_cheddar_rice_cakes/
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140 calories for 18 cakes. That's ONLY ~8 calories per rice cake, but if you're mermaid_puppy, it's more like 840 calories per bag. But not today. Today I stared into the abyss that was my pantry, grabbed 6 rice cakes, and forced myself to drink a huge mug of broth. Sodium content be damned! I'm off to look at thinspo on Pinterest, knowing that I might ultimately lose the war against my ED, but today, goddammit, I won the battle against rice cakes.
[Discussion] What happened when people found out about your ED?
/u/thelonelykitten_
Created: Tue Aug 16 12:21:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4y0zsu/what_happened_when_people_found_out_about_your_ed/
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Nobody knows about mine but I'm sure it'll come out eventually at least to my boyfriend. How did people find out about yours? What was the reaction?
[Rant/Rave] Everything about eating is so hard.
/u/smokesanddietcokes [<3 ]
Created: Tue Aug 16 11:51:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4y0tvg/everything_about_eating_is_so_hard/
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Fasting/restricting (at least enough) is hard, because I am hungry, tired and weak-willed.
Being 'sensible' and eating at least a little when I'm hungry to prevent binges is hard, because I want to resist and totally fast.
Eating to TDEE and having to get protein for my gym days is hard, because I want to at least restrict.
Binging is easy as shit, but the feelings and resulting weight gain are the hardest out of everything.
It's just all so hard.. There is literally no way of eating/diet I am comfortable and content and happy with.
I hate food. I fucking love food. I am obsessed with food. Food is the fucking devil.
[Discussion] How much do you usually gain during your period?
/u/bchuk183 [5'6 | 140 | 22.6 | -10lbs | F]
Created: Tue Aug 16 10:28:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4y0drw/how_much_do_you_usually_gain_during_your_period/
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I binged a bit this weekend but also have my period. Not sure which I should credit for the higher number of the scale. I've gone up by two pounds and I can't image that I ate thaaaat many extra calories in 2 days.
[Help] Exercising difficulties
/u/lovemyfragilebones [5'2" | 105 | 19.2/19.89 | -5 | gq 19]
Created: Tue Aug 16 10:23:04 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4y0cnx/exercising_difficulties/
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So, i get most of my exercise by going on long walks. I want to get my lungs to a place where i can jog; and build/tone some muscle to burn cals faster, but walking is what i do the most of
The problem is that there are a thousand and one anxieties that want to keep me from going outside and walking, and it usually takes more spoons to make the decision and get out the door than it does to actuay exercise.
[Discussion] Daily Food Diary! August 16, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Tue Aug 16 10:02:20 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4y08up/daily_food_diary_august_16_2016/
---
This is a daily food diary thread for August 16, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
[Help] Period makes me gain 2-3 pounds...
/u/throwaway03199519 [5'6 | CW 119.4 | GW 110| 19.35| -16.6 | F]
Created: Tue Aug 16 08:37:43 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xzta2/period_makes_me_gain_23_pounds/
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[removed]
[Rant/Rave] I made the mistake of cursing at my scale in front of my husband...
/u/MulattoKhaleesi
Created: Tue Aug 16 08:16:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xzphm/i_made_the_mistake_of_cursing_at_my_scale_in/
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He seemed to get to sad and said "I wish you were nicer to yourself."
Yeah I wish I was too.
But i'm nowhere near my goal and I gotta keep going. Just be more careful about what I say when I'm around him.
But on a side note though I did lose .3 more lbs after a month of plateauing, I'm chalking it up to the increase strength training since i'm in restriction mode. Sorry for the short shitpost. Just feeling vulnerable.
[Meme/Humor] After a long absence from being in Taiwan for 6 weeks, wassup
/u/shangen010 [Height:5' | CW:110/UGW:85 | BMI:22.6 | Weight Lost: -6| Gender:F]
Created: Tue Aug 16 08:07:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xzo1s/after_a_long_absence_from_being_in_taiwan_for_6/
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So, it's been a while and I gained five pounds in taiwan.
***cries****
and a new friend of mine showed me this video
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hBN-rv5H1qA
it's me.
this'll be me when school starts
[Rant/Rave] I went to the ER last night
/u/ctrl_alt_mermaid
Created: Tue Aug 16 07:50:35 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xzkzw/i_went_to_the_er_last_night/
---
I just had to tell someone. I can't tell my mum or my sister because they will want all the details which means telling them about my ED. I have only one friend who sort of knows that i restrict, but she has no idea how much and how bad it has become. She lives in another country now so we just message mostly and don't see each other often. I don't know why I don't want to tell her. I hate when people feel sorry for me...That look of pity. You know?
Anyway I had terrible stomach pains, so bad I couldn't stand up straight and got sick everywhere. The pain was absolutely excruciating. It felt like my intestines were knotted. They put me in a bed, filled me up with pain killers and took bloods. Luckily I ate my only 400 calories for the day not too long before the pain got really bad,so i guess that helped make my blood sugar levels for the blood tests passable. They don't know what it was and gave me a referral to see a specialist. I don't want to see the specialist because I don't want to tell anyone that I haven't had my period in almost a year and that I've probably fucked my insides with this ED. Idk, there's so many things that could have caused it. I was there from 9pm until 4am. I went home, had an EC stack, then dragged my ass to work and had to act like it was just another day.
Sorry for blabbering on. I just had to tell someone. Thanks for listening.
*Edit:* Thankyou all so much. I posted this last night right before I went to bed and woke up to see all your kind and beautiful words for me. It's so nice to know that we are all here for each other, willing to help with advice and listening to each other's concerns. It really helps. Thankyou. ❤️
[Help] Vitamins you can take on an empty stomach?
/u/tinyme23 [5'3" | 146 | 25.9 | -25 lbs | F]
Created: Tue Aug 16 07:34:22 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xzian/vitamins_you_can_take_on_an_empty_stomach/
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Hey lovelies,
So I've been water fasting a lot and it's just not smart for me to continue without actually including some vitamins. On fast days, I feel incredibly powerful and in control, but also malnourished and weak.
I used to take a multivitamin pill when I fasted but it would always make me crazy nauseous. It's an option for me to try to take them at night with my sleeping pills and just sleep through the nausea, but I was wondering if you lovelies had any recommendations for vitamins you can take on an empty stomach and not get sick.
<3
[Discussion] How do you recover from a binge?
/u/kickkkasss [5'5 | fat | -20lbs | F]
Created: Tue Aug 16 07:12:56 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xzeyg/how_do_you_recover_from_a_binge/
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I just feel so low right now. What do you do to stay mentally sane the day after a horrible binge?
[Discussion] How many people know about your ED?
/u/Itsemurha [177cm | 71.9kg| 22.43| -47kg | GW: 60kg | F]
Created: Tue Aug 16 06:40:06 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xz9za/how_many_people_know_about_your_ed/
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How did they find out? Did you tell them or did they find out otherwise? I am curious if it has changed anything about your ED behaviour since getting it out in the open.
If not, Why not?
I personally haven't told anyone but my therapist who then made it clear that my doctor also had to know. I fear telling anyone else that I am personally involved with because I don't want them to interfere or judge my every behaviour after finding out.
[Discussion] Self-care and Beauty Q+A August 16, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Tue Aug 16 06:02:39 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xz4nh/selfcare_and_beauty_qa_august_16_2016/
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Eating disorders are real, complex, and devastating conditions that can have serious consequences for physical health. Use this thread to discuss harm reduction and beauty tips, plus suggestions on how to build back up the physical self before and after engaging in disordered behaviors.
Please be wary of false advice and information. Be sure to research the facts before taking anyone's advice, no matter who they are. Remember that diagnosing members is unacceptable. **Anyone looking for medical guidance should seek the opinion of a medically licensed professional.**
*****
^Self-care ^and ^beauty ^threads ^are ^posted ^every ^Tuesday.
^Have ^any ^questions ^or ^concerns? ^Comment ^below, ^or [^PM ^the ^mods.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FproED)
[Goal] I did it, I finally got back on track!
/u/TeaCupGirl [5'8" | CW 124.8lbs | 19 | -15.2lbs |]
Created: Tue Aug 16 05:32:16 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xz0sa/i_did_it_i_finally_got_back_on_track/
---
All it took was
- visiting my abusive parents for a week in a house figuratively haunted by the ghosts of some of my worst memories
- having my mother assault me, then kick both me and my brother (for stopping her of course ;) ) out of the house to stay in a motel six
- paying 200 dollars to book a 2 day earlier return flight
- staying at the airport from 11am to when my flight left at 10pm
- being told that my plane was hit BY LIGHTNING!! and could not fly
- falling asleep on an airport floor freezing fucking cold with no food in my stomach
- then spending from 2am-1:15pm waiting for my return flight!
BUT HEY I LOST 5.4 POUNDS IN 6 DAYS SO IT'S WORTH IT, RIGHT?? H-HA HA-HA
[Help] Birthdays
/u/woollyshirt [172cm | 54.7kg | 18.33 | -33.3kg | NB/M]
Created: Tue Aug 16 03:02:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xykno/birthdays/
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My family are very food focused and it's also nearly my birthday. I'm terrified. I'm planning to bake some of my own birthday cupcakes/brownies/something so I can have pre-portioned calorie counted birthday snacks...is this a bad idea? Will this 'give me away?' I already do a lot of cooking and occasional baking so it's not unrealistic that I might actually want to make my own birthday cake or whatever. Any birthday advice in general? This whole day feels like ED hell :(
[Meme/Humor] A funny proud moment...
/u/mr_300_bag
Created: Tue Aug 16 01:25:29 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xyalr/a_funny_proud_moment/
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Day 2 of my 7 day fast and have a lot of extra spare time on my hands. Decided to see a movie tonight. Alone, because how else would I not eat, but I really don't mind! I went and saw Sausage Party - hilarious btw.
The proud moment: the popcorn smelled reeeeeal good - but bought nothing and ate nothing! Didn't even crave actually!
The funny: I just realized I watched an hour and a half of talking food. [crying emoji]
[Other] When shark week is coming...
/u/throwaway03199519 [5'6 | CW 119.4 | GW 110| 19.35| -16.6 | F]
Created: Mon Aug 15 22:03:04 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xxmvj/when_shark_week_is_coming/
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https://i.imgur.com/kVS1nN3.jpg
When shark week is
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Aug 15 22:02:22 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xxmro/when_shark_week_is/
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[deleted]
[Discussion] Other than your UGW, what other goals do you have?
/u/coffeelurk [F25| 5'4" | CW 121 | GW 100]
Created: Mon Aug 15 18:31:21 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xwr5q/other_than_your_ugw_what_other_goals_do_you_have/
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I'm very into setting goals and finding different motivations to achieve them. I write my goals down quarterly/yearly and make vision boards. Anyone care to share what other goals they're working towards other than being happy with their bodies? Personal, professional, spiritual, financial, etc?
Here's mine:
* Save for & buy a new car at end of 2017
* learn to garden
* Maintain my relationship (not let ED tendencies interfere - he's already suspicious) with my sweet man and hopefully marry him someday
* buy a house. not an easy task as I live in one of the hottest markets in the country
What are you working on? I want to know! Here's to reaching our goals <3
Other than your UGW, what other goals are you working towards?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Aug 15 18:19:42 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xwpeg/other_than_your_ugw_what_other_goals_are_you/
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[deleted]
[Discussion] I can't stop thinking about the mice (link included)
/u/Saltycook [5'4"| 128# |22.4| -35# | Female]
Created: Mon Aug 15 17:15:01 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xwffd/i_cant_stop_thinking_about_the_mice_link_included/
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A while back, this sub had a post about a study from Duke University which studied habits of mice that posessed a certain gene which caused anxiety and ocd behaviors. The scientists developed a treatment for the mice and they were working to develop the drug for humans. Every time I binge and purge, I think of the little beasts, who rub and pick bald spots onto thier heads. We aren't much different here. Picking, and tearing ourselves apart with little ability to stop. I'm tired of being a lab mouse.
Link: http://www.nimh.nih.gov/news/science-news/2007/gene-triggers-obsessive-compulsive-disorder-like-syndrome-in-mice.shtml
[Rant/Rave] I don't understand...
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Aug 15 17:09:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xwen9/i_dont_understand/
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[deleted]
[Help] Running for boob loss
/u/IWillBeAnACup
Created: Mon Aug 15 16:05:30 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xw431/running_for_boob_loss/
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I want to start running - actually running rather than just using the elliptical - and the one thing that's always stopped me is the thundering jiggling sacks of fail that are my breasts. Can someone assure me that running is at least worth it, in that it'll make my boobs smaller over time?
I'm okay with looking ridiculous for a while as a runner if my boobs will get smaller. And I do a lot of pec exercises to help tighten the area in general. Just... I want to know if it's worth it.
[Other] Reality check... :(
/u/HowToBeAsian25 [5'3.5 |115lbs |19.78 |-19 | F]
Created: Mon Aug 15 15:59:48 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xw34i/reality_check/
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About 20 days ago, me and u/DivingRightIn started PMing each other to help keep each other on track with our goals. We talked nearly every day until about 7 days ago when she took over 10 laxatives (I forget the exact number). She said she was in massive pain and was going to run a bath for herself. She hasn't logged in since.
[Intro] Hello again, guess who's had a relapse?
/u/MakingBadDecisions [5'7" | 121lbs | BMI 18.89 | Female]
Created: Mon Aug 15 15:53:35 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xw20e/hello_again_guess_whos_had_a_relapse/
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I thought if I got out of my unhappy relationship that I'd recover. That I wouldn't be okay with slowly wasting away and hating myself.
Well, guess that's bullshit because I'm in a new, happy relationship and I'm back in the same fucking position I was 5 months ago.
He knows about the ED and is encouraging healthy behaviours. He suggests we go to the gym together, go on long walks and outdoor activities, he cooks me small portions of healthy foods.
I know he's being supportive but I twist it as enabling. Like he's afraid I'll start gaining weight. Not likely, I feel like a fucking bloated whale and it doesn't help that being with him is like having sex with a thinspo page.
So this is where I am now. So, what have I missed?
[Rant/Rave] Irrational binge/restrict cycles.
/u/Alexa1p [5'5'' | 110 | 18 | -10.7 | F]
Created: Mon Aug 15 15:37:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xvz5u/irrational_bingerestrict_cycles/
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This is how my binge/restrict cycles work.
I'll be 120lb, drop 2/3 pounds. Be proud & happy of my weight. Eat normally/have a light binge. Get close to being 120 again. Panic, restrict, repeat.
This cycle will typically repeat for a month or two, sometimes three. Finally I'll hate myself at 118, and will drop a little lower, to 115-116.
The same cycle will continue to repeat, until something inside me I don't quite comprehend will actually learn to be so afraid of weighing close to X weight, I will be able to maintain a drop. It's so fucking irritating, but it doesn't seem like something I have a lot of control over.
[Rant/Rave] I feel so in control
/u/not_an_actual_egg [5'3" | 126lbs | 22.9 | F]
Created: Mon Aug 15 14:44:14 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xvpub/i_feel_so_in_control/
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And honestly it feels wonderful. I'm on day 1 of a 5 day fast and its comforting. I just feel free by not having to eat, or worry about what I'm going to eat. Its something I've missed in this past week of 'binging' (ie eating like a normal person). I love this feeling of control and I feel energized and free, something thats very rare in my ED bipolar 2 brain. Ive never felt so in control of myself before. Food doesn't control me- I control it. I control what goes into my mouth and what doesn't. And running my fingers over my bones is proof of that. And my empty stomach is proof of that. God I just feel so powerful right now.
Reading over this I sound kind of crazy, but I just love this feeling so much. I need this here so I can look back on it and remind myself of this wonderful feeling.
[Rant/Rave] [Rant] Why am I so weak?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Aug 15 14:42:55 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xvpm3/rant_why_am_i_so_weak/
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[deleted]
[Intro] Just an intro :)
/u/twigsandbones [5'7 | cw; to fat to share | 21.5 | 18f]
Created: Mon Aug 15 14:17:04 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xvkzo/just_an_intro/
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I've been browsing this sub for a few months however have been nervous to post as I feel way bigger then most of the people who post but I`m on holiday atm and trying to stay away from free food so I guess I´m here right?(Btw sorry for the typos if they´re any, I`m in Spain and the keyboard are different so I´m super confused lmao) Since this isn't my main account, I thought it be best to start with an intro.
I've been suffering with an ED since 15(Been in and out of recovery). Now 18 and have lost friends and suffering alone, I thought it be best to turn to the internet. The truth is that I`m not ready for recovery and I don`t know if Ill ever be. It sounds still but my ED is the only consistent thing I have in my life so here I am.
So hello lovely people!
[Help] Forced to get dinner here tonight... what would you get?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Aug 15 13:32:36 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xvclp/forced_to_get_dinner_here_tonight_what_would_you/
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http://gigglingricethaitogo.com/menu.html
[Rant/Rave] I need a new pair of jeans
/u/AmAlreadyGoingToHell
Created: Mon Aug 15 13:11:31 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xv8tf/i_need_a_new_pair_of_jeans/
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I literally have 0 that fit, they are all big on me.. That's good but no jeans fit me. Waist size 26? Flabby at butt, right on the waist and legs. 25? Too tight. 27? Haha, nope.
So I got upset because I also still looked fat. And now I have new running shoes.
[Rant/Rave] ArcticZero is a disgrace
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Aug 15 12:47:51 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xv4m3/arcticzero_is_a_disgrace/
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[deleted]
[Discussion] Fat Burners-DNP, T3, Clen
/u/ShadowK2
Created: Mon Aug 15 12:32:27 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xv1sw/fat_burnersdnp_t3_clen/
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[removed]
[Discussion] ED Books
/u/capture_the_excite [164cm | 55kg | 20.4 | F]
Created: Mon Aug 15 12:32:20 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xv1s2/ed_books/
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I'm curious if anybody has suggestions for eating-disorder related books? Whether that's biographies, self-help or fiction I don't care I'm just looking for something to read. :)
[Rant/Rave] My ED brain is finally working at 100%
/u/cheeekyslug [5'6" | UGW: 90 | -60 lbs since 6/20/16 | 19/F]
Created: Mon Aug 15 12:29:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xv19e/my_ed_brain_is_finally_working_at_100/
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Someone had broken my car window this morning and now I have more reasons to feel numb. It's a big expense on my part, will literally take out whatever I saved for food and school shopping.
The only positive thing about this is that I literally cannot buy anymore food or clothes for the next couple of weeks because I have to pay off other bills.
Just thought I share because now I have more reasons to starve and feel worthless!!!! I'll be living off water and my vitamins and caffeine pills for the rest of the month. But I guess I'll be skinny before school starts and that's all that matters lol
[Rant/Rave] Just purged for the first time in over a year
/u/boneobsessed [5'4" | Sw 173lbs | Cw 158.2lbs | -14 lbs | Gw 95lbs | F]
Created: Mon Aug 15 12:26:05 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xv0m8/just_purged_for_the_first_time_in_over_a_year/
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As the title says, this is my first purge in over a year and it's made me realise the binging truly isn't worth it. I'd estimate my binge was around 900 calories on top of the 156 calories I had today and I definitely did not get it all out. I know it's not enough to gain weight but now I feel really miserable. I don't know why I binged again. It seems whenever I'm in the kitchen I'll start looking through cupboards and then all my thinking goes straight out the window. I'm definitely put off everything I had though so I guess there is a plus side to this. I need to stop binging today because I hate myself as it is. Today is my last day of binging, ever. I'm not playing around this time. It has to end.
[Discussion] Body image, quality of life, and self worth discussion
/u/minamasood [5'6.5"| 111lbs| 22F]
Created: Mon Aug 15 12:01:13 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xuw1e/body_image_quality_of_life_and_self_worth/
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I just want to hear about how your eating disorder has affected your body image and self worth. How did you feel about yourself before your ED? Do you think you're good at anything? Do those things that you're good at matter to you? I'm also interested in how you feel you're perceived by others. Honestly, anything goes. I'm just curious and also lonely (boyfriend aka my only friend is busy today) and wanting to connect with others. Just tell me how your life and your emotional/psychological state had changed.
I have had an ED since I was 11 but the intensity ebbs and flows. When it's just very occasional B/Ps I'm a more vibrant person. I'm able to love others, enjoy socializing, and work on things I care about. I have interests like writing jokes, studying economics, and makeup. I feel fully engaged with the world around me. I enjoy and feel present during sex. I don't love my body but I don't pay much attention to it because I have better things to worry about. I can love my boyfriend, my friends, and my family because I don't have the fear that they don't love me. My life is multi faceted and I spend more time thinking about others and the outside world than myself.
During intense ED periods, I am alone. My interests are thrown to the side and looking at thinspo, pinching myself in the mirror, exercising and researching ways to restrict further take up most of my time. My opinion of myself is based on how well I was able to restrict and how hungry I feel. I only have sex so that he doesn't leave me and I think about my rolls and fat deposits the whole time. I can't love others because I'm consumed by the suspicion that they're disgusted by my fat body. I fear that if I eat in front of them they'll think I'm recovered and won't care about me anymore. I isolate myself. I don't want to talk to anyone. I wear the same ugly clothes every day. My life is small, focused precisely around my intake and my body.
Anyone interested in joining a Whatsapp group for live chat and accountability?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Aug 15 11:33:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xuqsw/anyone_interested_in_joining_a_whatsapp_group_for/
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[removed]
[Tip] 0 calorie drink for 1$ at walmart!!
/u/DrunkenRidgeley [5'10 | 190 | 27 | -20 | Male]
Created: Mon Aug 15 11:15:13 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xunb0/0_calorie_drink_for_1_at_walmart/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/0e32456f4b2c4c69a0815a7b8b875c65?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=79612460bae7603cdadd67665845c40e
[Other] I didn't know x-post bot was a thing!
/u/strongerthanyouknow [5'5" |145 |24.4 | -12 | F]
Created: Mon Aug 15 10:48:34 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xui3u/i_didnt_know_xpost_bot_was_a_thing/
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Howdy y'all. I'm sorry for starting a brigade :(
I've reported the comments on /r/WritingPrompts and messaged the x-post bot to blacklist our subreddit.
In case you are feeling left out, or want to read a great story of AN- read the writing prompt for "To get into heaven you have to apologize to the one person you hurt most, yourself."
I also deleted the x-post I made here in a hurry but I dont think that did any good :(
Again, i'm super sorry for hurting everybody here <3
[Other] Fun Shopping Trip
/u/WeighingDown [5'2" | 113 | 21.41 | F]
Created: Mon Aug 15 10:29:59 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xuend/fun_shopping_trip/
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http://imgur.com/ZmgDklO
[Discussion] Daily Food Diary! August 15, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Mon Aug 15 10:02:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xu9p4/daily_food_diary_august_15_2016/
---
This is a daily food diary thread for August 15, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
[Rant/Rave] i binged on chocolate milk :(
/u/Edible_pain [5 foot 6 in| 140 | -over 100lbs| F]
Created: Mon Aug 15 09:41:39 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xu5rf/i_binged_on_chocolate_milk/
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After a long weekend filled with squirt guns, running, wrestling, the zoo, and plenty of sun.. I drank a huge bottle of chocolate milk in just a couple hours. it was 280 cals per serving.. I drank all 11 servings. and ate a 260 cal figbar.. its not even 11AM yet and I am already fucking things up.
[Discussion] TW for AN! Stunning story from r/writingprompts
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Aug 15 09:36:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xu4wq/tw_for_an_stunning_story_from_rwritingprompts/
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https://www.reddit.com/r/WritingPrompts/comments/4xssb3/wp_to_get_in_heaven_you_have_to_confront_the/d6i6ij2
[Rant/Rave] small suffering
/u/tinyme23 [5'3" | 146 | 25.9 | -25 lbs | F]
Created: Mon Aug 15 09:20:25 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xu1wl/small_suffering/
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my head spins. i'm so dizzy.
last night I dreamt of blueberry pancakes. i don't even like blueberries.
i couldn't sleep until 3 because my stomach hurt. i felt betrayed. i don't want to eat, so why does my body disagree?
my head spins. i hope i am not too dizzy to work out today.
this is some small suffering to go through for the most important reward, i tell myself. i just need to get through the small suffering.
[Meme/Humor] EVERY-SINGLE-TIME
/u/Phantomsgf [5'2" | 144lbs | GW:125 | -16 lbs |F]
Created: Mon Aug 15 08:18:20 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xtr7t/everysingletime/
---
http://imgur.com/gallery/hLekb
[Discussion] What does your goal body look like?
/u/IWant2BASkeleton [5'7 | 151.0 | 23.7 | -16.8 | F]
Created: Mon Aug 15 07:52:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xtn3e/what_does_your_goal_body_look_like/
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Hello lovelies! I was thinking today about what my goal body is and how it's changed over the years that I've walked with this demon. & looking back, wow it's changed a lot. That got me thinking about y'all! I'm curious to know what your goal body is. If weight didn't exist and you had no way to measure your weight at all, what look would you be satisfied with? What would your goal look like?
[Goal] Fasting. Starting today. Here for accountability.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Aug 15 07:49:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xtmja/fasting_starting_today_here_for_accountability/
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[removed]
[Rant/Rave] When you get too good at meal planning
/u/LessIsMoreeee [5'4'' | CW 113 | GW 105 | 19.78 | -23 | F]
Created: Mon Aug 15 07:33:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xtk3m/when_you_get_too_good_at_meal_planning/
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http://imgur.com/gZ5fvq3
[Rant/Rave] Something from high school[RANT]
/u/High_as_red [5'3 | F]
Created: Mon Aug 15 07:24:53 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xtiuq/something_from_high_schoolrant/
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So today something just hit me and I've been avoiding food for hours. Which God Forbid wil lead to a nasty binge. I just recalled in gym class we had to go through segments "with a friend". The last four girls left was me, a skinny girl who is now a model, a fitness nut and captain of the hockey team. I was overweight and the skinny girl said "I wana go with high_as_red". Didn't think shit of it at the time. But she chose me so she could look better. Because I was fat and that meant I was slow and there would be no pressure on her. Ffs it hurt today really.
[Rant/Rave] Anyone elses metabolism absolutely fucked? [tmi]
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Aug 15 07:16:26 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xthlo/anyone_elses_metabolism_absolutely_fucked_tmi/
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[deleted]
[Discussion] Weekly Stats Update! August 15, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Mon Aug 15 06:03:44 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xt83d/weekly_stats_update_august_15_2016/
---
This is the weekly status thread for August 15, 2016.
The weekly status thread is to help motivate our users, and to eventually see how far they've come! Be it for weight loss, weight gain, or maintaining- everyone is welcome. Previous updates are archived [here.](http://www.reddit.com/r/proED/wiki/archives)
Please include the following information (with all necessary units of measurement):
* Height:
* Current weight (CW):
* Highest weight (HW):
* Lowest weight (LW):
* Goal weight (GW):
* Ultimate goal weight (UGW):
* Weight lost (WL):
* BMI: ([Use this to calculate your BMI](https://people.maths.ox.ac.uk/trefethen/bmi_calc.html))
* Age:
* Gender expression:
Here's a handy-dandy copy/paste of the above format:
* Height:
* CW:
* HW:
* LW:
* GW:
* UGW:
* WL:
* BMI:
* Age:
* Gender expression:
*****
^Status ^threads ^are ^posted ^every ^Monday.
^Have ^any ^questions ^or ^concerns? ^Comment ^below, ^or [^PM ^the ^mods.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FproED)
[Meme/Humor] When I thought I lost weight and I see myself in pictures
/u/poop_dawg [5'8" | CW: 145 | GW: 110 | BMI: 22 | +10lbs | F]
Created: Mon Aug 15 05:45:18 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xt632/when_i_thought_i_lost_weight_and_i_see_myself_in/
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https://media2.giphy.com/media/3XiQswSmbjBiU/giphy.gif
MFW I thought I lost weight and I pictures of me from an event
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Aug 15 05:43:05 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xt5te/mfw_i_thought_i_lost_weight_and_i_pictures_of_me/
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https://media2.giphy.com/media/3XiQswSmbjBiU/giphy.gif
[Rant/Rave] Is This How Normal People Think?
/u/FaithHopeTrick [5'7 | CW 124 GW 119 |19.35 | -31lbs | F]
Created: Mon Aug 15 04:37:52 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xsze6/is_this_how_normal_people_think/
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So I was talking to a friend this weekend. As I haven’t seen her in 15lbs she commented on my noticeable weight loss and then went on to express concern that I am getting too slim (I wish)
Anyway as we continued to discuss weight she admitted gaining several pounds since her wedding and wanting to get back to 10.5st (145lbs) she is roughly 5’7 tall and close to 150lbs so 145lbs is a healthy BMI weight. But what I couldn’t fathom was her comfort with that weight.
She had aimed to be 10st (140lbs) for her wedding. But due to lots of pre-wedding parties and stress eating she didn’t make it and didn’t mind. She has previously been 130lbs when running regularly. And yet she is totally 100% happy to be roughly 145lbs. She knows she can get to a lower weight if she tries, but she is happy where she is and didn’t express any desire to weigh less than 145lbs. Even though she has had a smaller body in the past, she is perfectly happy to have a bigger body.
I realise this is totally healthy and legitimate way to view weight. I know this sounds daft, but I had forgotten some people think that way. I have spent so many years, so much time and energy either being 145-155lbs and feeling horrible and fat or focusing on restricting it’s a total alien concept to me. I cannot imagine saying ‘I know I could lose more weight and still be healthy, but I don’t want or need to, I am happy where I am’
I have had a tough time having to postpone my GW date because of binging but this friend really made me question how I look at my body. I wonder if I will ever be happy? One thing is for sure. I won’t ever be happy at 145lbs. So I just gotta keep going.
[Rant/Rave] [rant] My boyfriend makes me coffee in the morning
/u/lotuslotad [5'6 | 147.2lbs | 24.08 | -20.8lbs | F]
Created: Mon Aug 15 03:17:34 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xsrok/rant_my_boyfriend_makes_me_coffee_in_the_morning/
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He insists on doing it and it is a lovely thought, bringing me my 'breakfast in bed'
But it's been seriously stressing me out that I don't know how much coffee he puts in it, I don't know how much milk he puts in, whether he uses a spoon with sugar on to stir, whether he puts in skim or semi skimmed milk.
I've been trying to get him to use the measuring cup for milk but I don't know if he does. Luckily he doesn't know this is a red flag behaviour and my fat ass isn't tipping him off to it either.
Weight I lost over 4-5 months
/u/rillivity
Created: Mon Aug 15 01:39:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xsif3/weight_i_lost_over_45_months/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/15c6c277f6ef4fe6aebe6e098eaf965b?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=996f2bb4449a82a802b39d25141e84f7
[Rant/Rave] My boyfriend told me my butt has gotten smaller
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Aug 15 01:22:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xsgp2/my_boyfriend_told_me_my_butt_has_gotten_smaller/
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[deleted]
[Discussion] GUYS GUYS GUYS HALOTOP
/u/drink_your_tea [168cm | CW 58 kg | HW 67.1 | SW ~63 | GW 49? | F]
Created: Sun Aug 14 23:16:39 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xs3o3/guys_guys_guys_halotop/
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[removed]
[Rant/Rave] Breakfast: check ☑
/u/finch_love [5'6" | 167.4 | 27.02 | -52.6 | F]
Created: Sun Aug 14 21:35:02 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xrqhc/breakfast_check/
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https://i.redd.it/zlx3h7xhsgfx.jpg
[Rant/Rave] A friend just made me cry.
/u/Sadomaniqui [5'5' | CW 136 lbs | BMI 23.1 | -14 lbs | F]
Created: Sun Aug 14 21:17:35 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xro2t/a_friend_just_made_me_cry/
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So, I haven't talked to this friend of mine in more than 2 months and haven't even seen him in a year. Our relationship has always been "agressive", we joke and insult each other a lot. But we appreciate each other.
Anyways, tonight he talks to me via facebook and starts the conversation telling me that today something reminded him of me, he was watching The Secret Life of Pets, and there's this cat, Chloe. She's pretty fat and eats a lot.
Well, he fucking tells me I'm just like the cat. I jokingly tell him "Nah, I'm fatter" and he says "haha yeah"
What the fuck? I mean, he doesn't even knows about my ED but fuck, today was a binge day and I was already feeling shitty and now I'm going to fast tomorrow and I can't stop crying over this stupid little thing. I hate being so fucking sensitive about everything.
[Discussion] DAE ever seen a low number and immediately feel like they haven't done anything to deserve it?
/u/piecesofthesun [5'4" | 130 | 22.31 | -0 | F]
Created: Sun Aug 14 20:46:33 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xrjis/dae_ever_seen_a_low_number_and_immediately_feel/
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Whenever this has happened to me recently, I've immediately felt like it's obviously a fluke and I've done nothing to earn it. And then I immediately shovel food into my face like an animal. Ugh. I'm so tired of feeling so out of control. It's like...after a decade of this shit, shouldn't I be better at it?
[Serious] Sex and ED
/u/ExpectoASlapo
Created: Sun Aug 14 20:35:02 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xrhse/serious_sex_and_ed/
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[removed]
When you had plans to lose 20 lbs this summer but you've only lost like 5 lbs and you're lowkey wondering if you're a sham or if you actually have an eating disorder
/u/ilovepugs_ [5'6 1/2" | 149.2 | 23.7 | -4.8 | F]
Created: Sun Aug 14 20:03:50 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xrd45/when_you_had_plans_to_lose_20_lbs_this_summer_but/
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http://imgur.com/hQcZcI8
[Rant/Rave] How do you deal with loss?
/u/kpatable [5'9" | 125.1 | 18.1/18.5 | -21.9 | F]
Created: Sun Aug 14 19:23:05 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xr70n/how_do_you_deal_with_loss/
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First I need to explain a little. And, to preface, this issue I have is related to how my mom was emotionally dependent on me from when I was a kid up until I went to college.
Anyway, I don't know how common this is, but I basically had this fantasy that a codependent relationship would make me happier than anything else in the world could. It was the thing I wanted most in life. But I wasn't aware that what I wanted was a codependent relationship until last month. And so, when I realized that was what I wanted, I realized not only that the bliss I was searching for doesn't exist, but also that attaining it would harm other people.
So I lost the hope that I would ever find the ultimate bliss I thought I could find for most of my life. The bliss that I thought would complete me doesn't exist. And like, I don't know how to deal with it. When I think about it, I can't stop crying because there is no way to resolve this. I've lost something I can never get back. How do I deal with this pain? This loss? How do *you* deal with loss?
[Rant/Rave] 7 day binge
/u/ClownLord-PlebMaster [5'8 | 145.6 | 22.0 | 27 lbs | F]
Created: Sun Aug 14 19:17:01 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xr636/7_day_binge/
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This whole fucking week I've been continuously shoveling food in my fat face. I have a drawer full of nothing but chips,pop,and peanut butter cookies. I've never hated myself so much. I dread weighing myself. :(
[Rant/Rave] Not Sure if Getting Better or Getting Lazy/Tired
/u/honeytarte [5'5" | CW: 119 | GW: 105 | -25 |]
Created: Sun Aug 14 18:58:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xr3aj/not_sure_if_getting_better_or_getting_lazytired/
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I have changed my plan, from 800-900 calories per day with occasional fasting to a zig-zag plan that totals to about 8800 per week/1250 average per day, slowing my weight loss.
I have changed my goal from 100 to 105, after using a calculator that with my measurements told me that my body fat percent was 15.3% currently (I mean, it's probably underestimating, but still) and I realized that if I chose to go to 100 I'd probably lose more muscle than I'm intending. (I'm kind of going for super slim-fit as opposed to emaciated waif. Like fitspo more than thinspo. Of course, that goal might change if I get to 105 and still feel fat, but we'll see.)
And I feel ok about these?? I'm not sure if I'm becoming less disordered or if I'm just as disordered but getting lazy and burned out by restriction. I dunno. Just felt like sharing. I think I might be moving in the direction of the limbo between recovery and full-blown disorder, but I think I'm okay with that and I know the people around me will like it much better.
Maybe in a few weeks I'll wrap back around to fasting 4 days out of the week, but at the moment: feels good, man. We'll see how this goes.
[Rant/Rave] [rant] I dont think I can survive
/u/p5ychdelight
Created: Sun Aug 14 18:46:52 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xr1gf/rant_i_dont_think_i_can_survive/
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This is my first post here and I'm fairly new to this sub so sorry if I get things wrong.
Basically, my situation is that my parents know about my desire to lose weight (never been diagnosed, so im just gonna call it that). So, infront of them, I have to eat normally to avoid suspicion.
However, whenever I get the opportunity to be responsible for my eating - like on summer camps and school trips - I always fast.
In two years, I will be going to university. This should be an exciting time, full of independence. But I cant survive by myself, without someone making me eat. So im really nervous about university. I just cant function as a proper human being and I dont know what im going to do?? Sorry its just really stressing me out and making me feel really useless. Anyone who's been through university - how did you not die?
[Discussion] What is your favorite scale?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Aug 14 18:33:53 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xqzgk/what_is_your_favorite_scale/
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[deleted]
[Help] Boyfriend and I are moving in together. Help?
/u/IWant2BASkeleton [5'7 | 151.0 | 23.7 | -16.8 | F]
Created: Sun Aug 14 17:56:22 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xqtnq/boyfriend_and_i_are_moving_in_together_help/
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I'm on mobile, so I can't flair, I'm sorry!
So my boyfriend and I are moving in together in a few weeks, right after labor day. He knows about my disorder but I'm honestly not sure if he knows how bad it's been/it is. Almost everyone who knows about it believes that I'm really healthy and strong and focusing on strength rather than skinniness. While it's somewhat true, I'm not going really for the waif 90's model heroin chic look anymore, I still want to be thin, perhaps underweight depending on how my body looks as I get to each goal. I want to be delicate.
Anyway. For the whole of our relationship so far I've been able to trick everyone into believing I'm doing great because I control my food intake very when when I'm alone and eat and drink like a very health conscious fitness nut when I'm with friends/family. It's been so easy to do this. I'm almost 20 lbs down from my highest weight in a few years. I still have about 20 lbs until I get to my goal and 30-35 to my UGW. But the reason this works so well is because I'm alone a lot. I've lived alone for a year. It's easy to eat 1 meal a day alone. Not so easy when you're combining finances and living with the boyfriend.
Am I going to have to be more transparent with him? Should I tell him I'm sick again and hope he doesn't tell my mom/doctor or make treatment a condition of our relationship? Should I just eat more & exercise more? Idk guys.
What did you wish you knew when you moved in with someone? If it makes a difference, he's also a manager & barback at the bar I work at, so I can't just say that I ate at work, because he will know I'm lying.
[Goal] Now that schools starting back up I'm going to be extra perfect
/u/CharChar12 [5' 9.5 |140lbs|21| Male]
Created: Sun Aug 14 17:54:02 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xqtb8/now_that_schools_starting_back_up_im_going_to_be/
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That means only one meal a day, which is dinner with family. (~700 cals)
It also means I won't chew and spit anymore because its taken over my brain. I need my brain to study so C&S has to go NOW.
I will get straight A's, and that's a fact. Hopefully this year is easier than the last was and I won't screw it up.
[Rant/Rave] Binging cycle.
/u/Ravanys [61" | 135.8 | 26.80 | 50 lbs | F]
Created: Sun Aug 14 16:56:27 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xqkrc/binging_cycle/
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I have spent the last week binging. I just want to stop. Going to not binge tonight if it kills me.
Silver lining. I was a lower weight this morning. Not my lowest but at least it is going in the right direction even with the binging.
[Goal] not weight related but...
/u/hayleystark [5'4"|NB]
Created: Sun Aug 14 16:46:25 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xqj5j/not_weight_related_but/
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will tag when off mobile! I'm too excited
I just tried on a jumper that I got a while ago because it was cheap & my butt was too big & my thighs were too. now it's a little baggy! not so much but I can see a difference even tho every scale I've stepped on says I'm the same weight. I'm feeling pretty ok atm :)
[Rant/Rave] used a calorie calculator to figure out what my intake should be and...
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Aug 14 16:01:16 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xqbrp/used_a_calorie_calculator_to_figure_out_what_my/
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[deleted]
[Discussion] anyone get obsessed with a certain food and only crave that specific food?
/u/throwawaygayz
Created: Sun Aug 14 15:02:16 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xq2i0/anyone_get_obsessed_with_a_certain_food_and_only/
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i seem to go through periods of my life where I only crave one thing. For a hellish time it was mac n cheese. right now all i ever want is french onion soup
[Goal] Fasting tomorrow
/u/wearebulletproof [5'4 | fat | 20F🎀✨]
Created: Sun Aug 14 14:52:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xq11a/fasting_tomorrow/
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Mostly posting this just to keep myself accountable. I'll add flair in 20ish minutes, when I get home.
I had a really shitty fucking weekend, food-wise, and I need to get myself back on track. So I'm not eating for the rest of the day and I'm fasting tomorrow. I've got plenty of Powerade zero and mio so there's no reason for me to fail.
Wish me luck, I guess?
[Other] Found this on r/oddlysatisfying - raw food cut in to 2.5cm cubes. Dont know why but I find it appealing?
/u/skinnypod [5'6" | 121 | 19.8 | F]
Created: Sun Aug 14 14:51:23 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xq0r1/found_this_on_roddlysatisfying_raw_food_cut_in_to/
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https://i.imgur.com/DFz1yHp.png
[Help] Doctor visits
/u/negativeraisins [5'0" | 69 lb | 14.19 | -53 lb | FTM]
Created: Sun Aug 14 14:50:22 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xq0ka/doctor_visits/
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Sorry for always doing this, and definite possible TMI coming ahead (health-related), and for not being on (and always being on mobile when I am), but I'm freaking out a little.
So I've given up hiding my eating habits from my parents - there's literally no other way for me to restrict as low as I feel I need to without it. Somehow, they still don't suspect disordered eating concerning weight loss lmao, just take my "I feel like sick if I eat that much" and just yell at me for "feeling sick"... Anyway.
I'm being forced to see a psychologist, my usual doctor, a blood work doctor, and a gynecologist. The psychologist I think I can handle in a way that'll justify me being there without getting me under too much suspicion, and I really can't do anything about physical check-ups, but... I'm concerned about the gynecologist. I haven't had a period for months (I think? I've never really tracked it), possibly from low body weight? (I'm 5'0"/152 cm and last time I had access to a scale I was 32.4 kg/71.5 lbs) But prior to everything regarding eating, my cycle was always weird in that it's bleed for a month and then stop for a week, or once bleed nonstop for over a year with maybe a few days here and there of no bleeding and then nothing for a month, stuff like that. So there might actually have been a concern.
I just. Don't know? What I'm supposed to say? I've never been to a gynecologist before, for one thing, and so I don't know how it works. Do I lie and say my cycle is normal now? I don't really track it, so at least that's not a lie...
Any advice would be really appreciated. (Regarding the psychologist too, actually...)
[Help] For those of you that were previously unable to stop a binge, how did you learn to stop before you started?
/u/LiamNeesonsMegaCock [5'4'' | CW: 145 lbs | 25.38 | GW: 105 lbs | F]
Created: Sun Aug 14 13:58:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xps1s/for_those_of_you_that_were_previously_unable_to/
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My binges are getting worse and I'm feeling the effect on my health every day. It's so miserable and I'm just desperate at this point. I'm reading Brain over Binge and it's kind of helping decrease in frequency and devastation of binges, but I'm not able to stop.
Just to clarify, I'm just looking for advice for helping my own harm reduction. Also not looking for advice on how to restrict.
[Tip] My dinner last night - apple cider bbq breast at Cracker Barrel (330 calories + 50 for fruit)
/u/screamingfalcon [5'7.5"/171.45cm | CW: 2fat4me | GW: 121 | UGW: 108 | F22]
Created: Sun Aug 14 13:22:48 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xplz3/my_dinner_last_night_apple_cider_bbq_breast_at/
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http://m.imgur.com/5lZ7A8H,iKR47tU
Dear burger king, please go away
/u/AmAlreadyGoingToHell
Created: Sun Aug 14 12:41:03 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xpeu2/dear_burger_king_please_go_away/
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http://i.imgur.com/wUu6WhO.jpg
[Other] my co-worker
/u/dogfucker_420 [5'6" | 117 | 18.9 | -43# | F]
Created: Sun Aug 14 12:28:26 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xpcol/my_coworker/
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sorry, not sure what to flair this as (I'm on mobile anyway) but thanks for reading, it's kind of just a drabble
I work with a really pretty, skinny girl. she's three inches taller than me but I'm fairly certain she's my weight. (117 as of today)
we work in a deli. I've been super good lately about not eating everything in sight, and when someone offers me a sample or there's food upstairs in the break room, I refuse.
my co-worker and I talk a LOT about food, body image, and weight loss. I came to work one day wearing pants that barely fit me when I was 160lbs. I told her how much I used to weigh and she was absolutely floored. she didn't believe it. it made me feel pretty good, to be honest.
that same day we were talking about bingeing, although I didn't use that term. she told me that some days she feels really bloated and fat (me too )and that she can't see what her boyfriend sees (me too). some days she'll see her hip bones and think she looks really good. she also told me she used to have an eating disorder (!!)
there is a strange mix of emotions inside me. she'll offer me food and say "you're no fun" when I decline. I told her I'm still trying to lose weight and she'll say "you're so skinny already! you're like ninety pounds!" (I wish haha)
I want to be thinner her, definitely. as if I want to be better at having disordered eating than her. I know how mentally unstable that is. lately when we are working together, I try extra hard to avoid samples because.........I want to make her feel bad.
that's terrible of me to do. she's moving in November, but I want to lose these last seventeen pounds and get to my pre-high school weight. I want her to notice, and I want her to be jealous.
she's my equal in terms of how good she is at her job, we both get praised often and are regarded as some of the best members on the team. but....idk.I want to be better than her. I want to be skinnier than her. before she joined us I was the only young girl working there. I know how petty it sounds.
at the same time, I want to drag her down with me. I want to talk to someone irl about how I only ate 800 calories that day, how I obsessively study my reflection every morning, how I pinch my fat every time I'm lying or sitting. I want someone that understands how it feels to break down when you over ate by a hundred calories. you guys are great, but I don't post here often and its hard to make friends through PMs.
obviously, I don't want to push her back into her eating disorder. that's a real shitty thing to do, especially when I consider how long I've struggled with this when it's gotten real bad. and I don't want to lose too much weight and have her get concerned for me either. there's just this other side of me, one that's all about vanity and narcissism and ego. it's hard to ignore those thoughts. it's hard to not make this into a one sided competition so I can feel better about myself.
[Other] I start a bachelor in nutrition in a week
/u/AmAlreadyGoingToHell
Created: Sun Aug 14 11:43:49 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xp569/i_start_a_bachelor_in_nutrition_in_a_week/
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And I'm sort of freaked out that I;
1. Raise all the red flags there
2. Fail again (this is my second attempt at college)
3. I might ever cure from these thoughts and won't be intrested anymore.
Soooooooo tempted to binge right now. Stress. Stress. Stress.
[Rant/Rave] [Rant] avoiding people & guy stuff
/u/SoFetchBetch [67.75" | 109.4lbs | 16.61 | 19lbs | F | GW: 107 lbs or 16 bmi]
Created: Sun Aug 14 11:39:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xp4hp/rant_avoiding_people_guy_stuff/
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Hey all, I've been away for a bit and trying to cut down on more extreme behaviors but I'm now coming back to a place where I miss my ed and I missed y'all too.
I've been seeing someone who I have known for a long time and he struggles with food issues as well. He was overweight when we met and his weight went up and down his whole life. After we knew each other for awhile and I moved away he lost all the weight and got really fit. I later found out this was largely because of wanting to impress me. He's stayed healthier since then and I've lost 20 lbs over that time. My bmi was 19 then and now it's 17 or so. I want to get to 16. When we spend time together we are really self deprecating about eating and weight. We call ourselves "fats" a la Last Man on Earth because we both get bingey on the same foods and feel guilty. He will straight up say to me, oh I've been SO fat today and I need to get to the gym and just stop. I kind of like it because I can be real with him about my own guilt with eating bad foods but at the same time I find that talk really triggering with my bad habits and it's taken a toll. I haven't gotten on my scale in a week or so because I'm scared. I feel disgusting. I feel I'm plateauing and I have a goal weight in mind that I'm sick of not reaching. My mom has been more on me about eating and I'm trying to go with the flow so she doesn't freak out but I haaaate having to eat a big meal like every day. It's making me feel sick. I need some good fast days and I never seem to get them. I'm gonna try for some this week.
Also, my super skinny fwb who lives on the west coast is moving back here to the east coast. He's been here 2 days and I've avoided him. I feel shitty for doing that but I don't want him to see me with this extra whatever amount of pounds I've put on this summer. Could be anywhere from none to 8 or 9 lbs. I don't even know if I've actually gained, I just feel gross visually. I can't bear to see him til I get to my gw..
On the bright side I'm getting close with a new girl friend who wants to gym together and I'm sooo excited about that! So yeah... sorry for the wall of text.
Does anyone else avoid certain people when they feel over their goal? How to fix this?
[Rant/Rave] I feel I only look decent when I'm laying down
/u/boneobsessed [5'4" | Sw 173lbs | Cw 158.2lbs | -14 lbs | Gw 95lbs | F]
Created: Sun Aug 14 11:17:33 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xp0tl/i_feel_i_only_look_decent_when_im_laying_down/
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My hip bones become slightly visible, my ribs start to show, my fat stomach doesn't disappear but it's a bit less noticeable. I'm at a point where I can't even look in the mirror because nothing shows up properly while I'm standing up. I just want my body to look how it does when I'm laying down when I'm standing. Ugh.
[Rant/Rave] I'm having a hard time. I don't like food anymore and don't see the effort
/u/twiggin [5'9" | 140 | 20.7 | 0 GW: 120 | F]
Created: Sun Aug 14 10:50:37 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xowe2/im_having_a_hard_time_i_dont_like_food_anymore/
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I'll preface by saying I'm an alcoholic. I do like food if it's made for me but on the days I don't eat out, I have a hard time making food for myself. All this weekend I've only had an (entire!) bag of salt and vinegar chips which came in at 960 calories. The rest was in alcohol.
This morning I had four cups of black coffee and now I'm drinking mimosas. I feel the orange juice has some caloric value.
Sorry to vent, it's just a hard thing to go through. I can't make myself a tuna sandwich because I feel it's a wasted effort.
[Meme/Humor] When you finally reach your UGW
/u/throwawayyaymatehaha [5'3" | CW: 94 | 17.11 | -32 | F]
Created: Sun Aug 14 10:39:01 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xouh5/when_you_finally_reach_your_ugw/
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZTq_XHdQPSI
[Discussion] Daily Food Diary! August 14, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Sun Aug 14 10:02:22 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xooqa/daily_food_diary_august_14_2016/
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This is a daily food diary thread for August 14, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
[Rant/Rave] So depressed and stressed about my relationship
/u/tokkibun
Created: Sun Aug 14 09:42:18 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xolo8/so_depressed_and_stressed_about_my_relationship/
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Over the past few months my ED has been tearing my relationship with my partner apart. We live together but have very different schedules, and recently we haven't hardly been talking much or spending any time together.. I don't know what to do, I love him so much and I'm so upset, but I'm not ready to let go of my ED... I'm just so worried that things will end and I'll go off the deep end again.
I'm so lonely and depressed, I wish that I could voice this to more of my friends, but they would all just tell me to go back into treatment for my ED, and obviously I don't want that.
Anyway, this is really just me venting- thanks for reading. xoxo
[Discussion] Realizing how much mental energy you put into food, weight, ect.
/u/chaoticclare [5'1 | CW: 130 | HW: 160 | GW: 115 | 21/F]
Created: Sun Aug 14 09:27:39 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xoji4/realizing_how_much_mental_energy_you_put_into/
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Does it depress anyone else? I have a lot of trouble remembering what I thought about in my pre-ED days. I mean, I've had mine for four years now, and it's changed a lot (I used to be 90lbs...fuck) but what hasn't changed is the fact that this disorder is honestly...my entire life.
I hate myself for it honestly. I look around at my "normal" friends and am so envious of how food and eating until satisfied is so innate for them. We all had that once.
I woke up 3+ heavier this AM (bringing me back into the overweight BMI bracket) after having hit a normal weight yesterday morning so I feel as if I am just being bitter and cranky.
[Rant/Rave] I'm tired of my disorder
/u/glipglopsfromthe3rdD [5'1" | 109 | 21.51 | female]
Created: Sun Aug 14 08:07:14 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xo8bv/im_tired_of_my_disorder/
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I want to eat yummy food without hating myself. I want to be a normal fucking person who gets excited instead of anxious when I go to a restaurant. I want to start my day drinking coffee WITH CREAM, and I want to not feel like a failure when I do. But I am not ready to stop trying to lose weight.
I want to eat enough food to actually make my weight lifting count - I want to eat enough to recover quickly, instead of feeling my leg workout for the next 5 days.
But I am not ready to stop trying to lose weight.
Goddamn. Sorry, this is pointless. I'm so conflicted. I want something else. I want to stop obsessing but I want to be happy with my body. I want to LIKE myself. I want to believe people when they say that I'm small and pretty. I want to feel confident enough that I can stop hating my body and finally get laid.
At least when I was 20 pounds heavier, I ate whatever I wanted. I hate myself just as much now as I did then. The only difference is I want to cry after eating a donut these days....
[Other] I wrote a letter to food.
/u/KatnipAndTuck [5'2 | 156 | - 5 | F]
Created: Sun Aug 14 07:39:23 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xo4tb/i_wrote_a_letter_to_food/
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So a while ago someone posted on here about the love food podcast so I started to listen to it. If you don't know it's people writing about their fucked up relationship with food and food writes them back after a blurb from a haes dietitian. I'm not super into the haes but I love hearing people talk about their issues.
I decided to write a letter to food and post it here. I also sent it to the host of the podcast, but I'd doubt that she'll read it because she tries to get people help.
Here goes.
Dearest food,
We have a long history, don’t we? You are the longest relationship I have ever had, and the most fucked up. I haven’t always been completely faithful, but I can’t apologize for that just yet. To apologize would meant that I will stop, and I’m just not sure I can.
I do remember the good times, Food. Remember the creamy pasta in London? When I realized for the first time that travelling on your own is so much fun and not as scary as I thought it would be. Remember how mom went through phases of preparing you and became a running joke? Like the broccoli salad summer of 2005, and the winter of roasted root vegetables. I remember times sitting around the campfire singing and laughing with friends over nothing and eating smores.
The problem is that I also remember the bad times. I remember sitting at the table as a young kid, while my brother screamed about not wanting to eat anything my mom put out. How she always looked so stressed and sad back then and I didn’t want to add to that. I just didn’t want to make things worse so I just ate until my plate was empty even if it made my tummy hurt by being full. I remember how my brother was allowed two pieces of toast everyday after school with loads of butter and jam at my babysitter’s and I was only allowed one, and ONLY on Wednesdays. Do you remember gorging with food in front of the tv when I got to middle school and didn’t need a babysitter? And the weight gain that insued? That’s when I learned to purge. After I got into a habit I couldn’t stop even though I wanted to, and to make it better I tried to make myself throw up like I saw on family guy that day. That memory is so clear. What about that time when we were having Sundays with brownies on top and I put a few too many and mom said “don’t be a little piggy”? I felt so small. I went upstairs to purge and cry while the others watched Glee. When I went to residence and had a unlimited supply of premade food from the caf I gained 20 pounds. The summer that followed I broke up with you, food. I starved myself and lost 40 more. Back then I felt so good about how I looked, now I weigh the same and fear that I will never be smaller.
I’m not ready to give up dieting, or diet pills, or frankly I’m not ready to give up purging when I have failed myself. Even though my mother has urged me to get help before I completely ruin my body, but I just can’t bear the thought of looking like I do now for the rest of my life. I don’t want to have to question whether someone is lying to me when they tell me I am beautiful. I don’t want anyone to see the dimples on my thighs when I stand up straight. On the other hand, I also don’t want to feel bile rising in my throat when I have finished a binge. I don’t want to panic after I eat a large meal with my family. I want to be able to eat a meal with my friends or family without analyzing who ate the least amount or worrying if it wasn’t me.
I know it’s not a bad thing to be fat, but I don’t think I could handle the rest of my life being fat in this world. Not with this culture.
Love (at least trying to),
Scared of Peace
[Discussion] What is your diagnosis?
/u/throwaway03199519 [5'6 | CW 119.4 | GW 110| 19.35| -16.6 | F]
Created: Sun Aug 14 06:49:19 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xnyup/what_is_your_diagnosis/
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I guess I'm just curious what everyone has been diagnosed as! I am diagnosed with depression and anxiety and an eating disorder NOS. I was formerly misdiagnosed with borderline personality disorder. What about you guys?!
[Other] ProED is starting to feel like a weight loss sub :/
/u/Tiny_peach [5'3" | 96.3 | 17.53 | -18]
Created: Sun Aug 14 05:07:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xnppr/proed_is_starting_to_feel_like_a_weight_loss_sub/
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It's been an amazing source of support and connection for me for a long time but I'm finding it more frustrating than helpful these days. There are lots of places to get support and tips for weight loss (healthy or unhealthy), but this was the only one I had for honest conversation about all the other ways ED impacts my life and I feel like that aspect is getting buried - while I still appreciate the supportiveness of the community, I feel kind of out of place now (even though obviously I want to lose weight too).
I've never been a super visible user but the sub got me through some seriously shitty times so I wanted to say goodbye and thank you. I hope you all reach your goals, whatever they are - weight, body, wellness, any and all of it. <3
[Other] Sketched after a binge... :/
/u/Itsemurha [177cm | 71.9kg| 22.43| -47kg | GW: 60kg | F]
Created: Sun Aug 14 05:06:01 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xnpk6/sketched_after_a_binge/
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http://i.imgur.com/HLbW2Te.jpg
[Rant/Rave] I weighed myself... why did I do that...
/u/l-ostcaus-e [5ft 6| Fattest of the Fats | F | GW 1: - 15lbs | UGW: 99lbs]
Created: Sun Aug 14 03:47:03 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xnjy5/i_weighed_myself_why_did_i_do_that/
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[removed]
[Help] Help...
/u/KillingKylie [5'5| Piggy|-25|F|GW: 97]
Created: Sun Aug 14 03:34:23 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xnivz/help/
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I am in hour 60 of a water fast and my heart is beating very rapidly. Has this happened to anyone else? If so what can I do to calm it?
[Discussion] Weed makes me binge
/u/depression-or-pms [5'4 | CW:131lbs | GW 125| GW2 115lbs | F]
Created: Sun Aug 14 00:43:35 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xn41g/weed_makes_me_binge/
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I know you're supposed to get the munchies but even after I eat and get full, I keep eating to the point where I'm bloated and can't move.
😞
[Rant/Rave] Life is great.
/u/lightfeathers
Created: Sun Aug 14 00:36:23 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xn3cy/life_is_great/
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Had a binge week. Or two. I feel like a huge tub of lard. I'm too scared to check my weight and I know I've gained. My body is awful and I'm getting stupider everyday. I'm also shedding more hair and I'm probably dehydrated. My skin is dry and I look like I have two black eyes. My head always hurts and I get super nauseous that I actually feel like vomiting. And yet I still stuff myself with junk.
Could be worse, I guess.
Is this considered a binge?!? What will happen?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Aug 14 00:31:33 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xn2vh/is_this_considered_a_binge_what_will_happen/
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[deleted]
[Discussion] Loose skin
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Aug 13 23:49:38 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xmyq6/loose_skin/
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[deleted]
[Help] Will someone please invite me to skinnygossip?
/u/fluffydaffodil
Created: Sat Aug 13 23:46:43 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xmyer/will_someone_please_invite_me_to_skinnygossip/
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[removed]
[Other] No context. No subs liked it. I painted for the first time in my life and of course it was my current craving.
/u/Scooter_Boots
Created: Sat Aug 13 21:47:11 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xmkkc/no_context_no_subs_liked_it_i_painted_for_the/
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http://imgur.com/VlwzTPh
[Discussion] Can always tell when weight has been gained
/u/stephanynotstokes [5'6 |Weight Lost: 70 lbs | F]
Created: Sat Aug 13 21:25:35 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xmhgy/can_always_tell_when_weight_has_been_gained/
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[removed]
LOOOL
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Aug 13 21:10:52 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xmfig/loool/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] Wine is awesome.
/u/PBhatesme [5'4"| 144 | 24.7 | -52| F]
Created: Sat Aug 13 21:07:59 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xmf4r/wine_is_awesome/
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So hanging out with husband and BFF (who stayed over for the 2 days). BFF who is probably *just* this side of overweight was complaining about how much bread she's eaten this weekend.
I tend to keep keto so I was complaining about overall calories for the weekend. (I've been averaging around 800 this week- I was up to about 1100 the last two days. Not that I told anyone this, but still). After much wine, I finally said, "Dude. I hear you. I'm still looking to lose 30 pounds." Granted it's actually 40ish but no need to claim that.
She freaked the fuck out. And was all, "You're so tiny! I don't know where you could lose 30 pounds from. If you're super serious, maybe, ten?" Husband was like, "It's just easier to go, 'Yes, dear.' Lol.
Cut to: So BFF thinks I should ten pounds :( She's not wrong. Hence the 40ish I want to lose, but I feel like only I should be able to decide my weight loss goals. Anyone else get annoyed when other people pick their goal weight?
[Discussion] Favorite Low-Cal Recipe Resources?
/u/throwaway-soph [5'5" | 103.6 | 17.44 | Depends | Female]
Created: Sat Aug 13 20:50:23 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xmct3/favorite_lowcal_recipe_resources/
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Hey all! So next week I'm moving into my first apartment and will actually be able to cook and do my own thing with my food. I'm a sophomore in college, so I've sort of lived on my own before, but this is the first time with an actual kitchen. So, I'd really like to have a good amount of low-cal recipes on hand to play around with (I may have food issues but I do actually love to prepare food as long as its safe food). What are y'all's favorite websites for recipes? I'm vegetarian/sometimes vegan so I'd love recommendations in that vein.
Some of my favorites that I've found are Chocolate Covered Katie and Deliciously Ella. I have orthorexic tendencies so I love cooking blogs that kinda skirt around that tendency.
Any suggestions?
[Rant/Rave] Are you fucking kidding me.
/u/wearebulletproof [5'4 | fat | 20F🎀✨]
Created: Sat Aug 13 20:11:23 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xm7h8/are_you_fucking_kidding_me/
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3 pounds.
That was my goal for this weekend because I've been stuck in the 150s for over a week and I'm fucking tired of it. If I could just get to 149, I'd feel a little less worthless. But then today, my mom comes home with two boxes of doughnuts, a bag of mini Reeses cups and a bag of mini kit kats.
I haven't had enough to binge so I guess that's good, but I ate a lot at work today and I have no idea what the macros on our food are and I've had at least 600 calories worth of junk in the past couple hours.
I hate how fragile I am.
[Help] Help: how do y'all avoid eating at the table w/ your family?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Aug 13 19:53:29 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xm52v/help_how_do_yall_avoid_eating_at_the_table_w_your/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] He said "I wish you actually got excited about something"..
/u/ratpoisonfurdinner
Created: Sat Aug 13 19:52:35 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xm4z2/he_said_i_wish_you_actually_got_excited_about/
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After I shrugged when he asked if I wanted to make a special mixed drink tonight, that I had said sounded good.
I couldn't think of a reply because I was too busy trying to calculate how many extra calories would be in it compared to my normal vodka and diet soda.
I also remembered that we'd have to go to an extra store to pick up the ingredients, when all I wanted to do was go home and melt into the couch and forget about the dinner I couldn't purge.
Get excited about something? Some days I barely feel like I can get out of bed.
All my energy is used up in just existing.
And passions.. hobbies.. what? Is stuffing my face and then trying to add up all I ate, and what percentage was lost in the toilet a hobby? Because I'd deserve a trophy then.
I've been depressed lately.
[Rant/Rave] I just had a second dinner.
/u/Stevie_M [5'4| 115.0 | 20.13| -45 | F]
Created: Sat Aug 13 19:31:42 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xm201/i_just_had_a_second_dinner/
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I can't believe I did it. I had all of my meals planned out for today and this happened. I don't even know how many calories I had. I'm fasting tomorrow, I need to get my shit together. :(
Anyone else having a bad day? :(
Almost at my UGW and I binged !!!
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Aug 13 19:21:52 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xm0qg/almost_at_my_ugw_and_i_binged/
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[deleted]
[Meme/Humor] Binging when you're emotional like
/u/sewnp [168cm | GW:90lbs | NB]
Created: Sat Aug 13 18:57:31 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xlxkt/binging_when_youre_emotional_like/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/8197e87bbba74009b97758a3ac35ba3c?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=05fcca2ed4f97d5245a9e4b245b2c438
[Rant/Rave] Bad day. (rant)
/u/stephanynotstokes [5'6 |Weight Lost: 70 lbs | F]
Created: Sat Aug 13 18:26:04 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xlthr/bad_day_rant/
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*cant flair on mobile*
I live with a physically and emotionally abusive mother who's favorite thing is to call me fat/dumb/lazy etc (hint at why i developed an ED/depression). She never took my ED seriously , she caught me purging one time about a year ago and gave me this stern lecture she said and I quote word for word "black people don't have EDs, that's something you caught from your white friends, you're embarrassing. If I catch you throwing up again I'm going to beat the shit out of you."
Ever since then I've been very carful about purging, I almost never do it in the house or if I do, I do it in my room or when she's not home.
Today I made a bowl of Raviolis (one of those $1 chef boyarde red cans), this was going to be the only thing I was going to eat for the day. I got side tracked and left the bowl in the microwave while I took a nap. I wake up to her yelling at me to get in the kitchen. She starts yelling about how I waste food, how I'm a dumbass, how I waste money, and how I'm so big because I'm eating all the time.
I make it a point to make it LOOK like I'm eating a lot. I use old wrappers from candy and leave them around, or the one time I do eat during the day I make sure it's in front of her, or I rattle plates and pans in the kitchen without actually cooking. I fasted for 7 straight days one time, she never even noticed.
My point is, I've lost 60+ pounds and I still can't catch a break, I thought maybe she's mad at me because I'm fat so I lost weight and (I'm still big/still loosing weight) but now I weigh less than her (she's also over weight) and she's still being mean. Maybe some people are just hatful. Maybe I deserve it.
[Rant/Rave] Binged two days in a row and I hate myself
/u/println-Hello_World [5'4 | 115.7 | 20.25 | 21.3 | F]
Created: Sat Aug 13 17:36:07 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xlmuz/binged_two_days_in_a_row_and_i_hate_myself/
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I wasn't going to post here because I do so much, but I binged yesterday & thought I'd turn it around today **but didn't.** I blame it on the cupcakes a family member gave us. Keep your own damn junk food if you're going to buy it! *sigh* I'm starting a liquid fast tomorrow because I've never done a full-on fast before. I think I'll do it *at least* two days in a row, and more if my mom doesn't catch on. Back to fake-eating food (PSA: don't chew up cereal and spit it out, it's disgusting). It's not going to be a zero-calorie fast, but it'll be less than I usually eat and...something.
I'm just ranting, so if you guys have binged recently feel free to share your woes. If you've done a juice fast, let me know how it went. :)
[Rant/Rave] :)
/u/sewnp [168cm | GW:90lbs | NB]
Created: Sat Aug 13 17:28:32 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xllvh/_/
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I am nothing and will not ever be anything of worth. I will die cold and alone in this earth because no one can love me. I don't work hard enough. I'm not smart enough or pretty enough. I can't drive because of my anxiety. Everyone probably thinks I'm a fucking loser. I'm unburnable trash that can't even get out of the way. I should just die and then everyone could be happy. And I could be happy because I'll be able to rest finally.
Flair as rant pls
[Rant/Rave] i love bingeing in front of people!!!!!!
/u/crapbeg
Created: Sat Aug 13 17:10:02 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xlj39/i_love_bingeing_in_front_of_people/
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so my friends and i went out to dinner tonight. it was defs a good night, really fancy restaurant and i told myself to enjoy as much of the meal as i could without thinking about it because it;s definitely a special occasion.
ended up eating everything that i was given. like every single bit on my plate. nobody else finished dessert and everyone was watching me like a hawk while i ate every single bit of it. i made a big show of how i'd 'managed to eat it all' but i want to cry because i imagine everyone is laughing at how i (the fat one) just gulped it down. my close friend even put up a snapchat story of me eating (in a sweet way - she doesn't know about my food issues).
fuck i just want to cry.
[Other] Great article re: metabolic "damage"
/u/lithelife [5'4''| CM: 35-27-39| GM: 33-23-36 | F]
Created: Sat Aug 13 17:03:22 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xli1o/great_article_re_metabolic_damage/
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http://www.precisionnutrition.com/metabolic-damage
[Thinspo] Sarah Marie Karda - Gender fluid thinspo <3
/u/katiejay_ [5"9 | Godzilla | BMI 26 | F]
Created: Sat Aug 13 16:41:32 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xletd/sarah_marie_karda_gender_fluid_thinspo_3/
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https://www.instagram.com/sarahmariekardax/
[Discussion] Docu series on obesity. I thought it was really interesting and accurate.
/u/kpatable [5'9" | 125.1 | 18.1/18.5 | -21.9 | F]
Created: Sat Aug 13 16:35:52 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xldxz/docu_series_on_obesity_i_thought_it_was_really/
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h0zD1gj0pXk&list=PL39F782316B425249&index=1
[Rant/Rave] I'm so, so angry at myself.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Aug 13 16:19:11 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xlbj9/im_so_so_angry_at_myself/
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[deleted]
[Tip] Low cal breakfast
/u/Saltycook [5'4"| 128# |22.4| -35# | Female]
Created: Sat Aug 13 15:32:44 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xl46w/low_cal_breakfast/
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So I but things for different applications for cooking, but since I restrict a lot of produce gets frozen. I woke up this morning sweating my ass off in a 90 degree apartment and opened the freezer, retrieved watermelon and Thai basil. Blended these with a little water and fiber power. Voila! Tasty, cold, low-cal (about 76 cal for 8 fluid ounces). I would add a pinch of salt next time to contrast the sweetness
[Rant/Rave] What shitty things do you do because of your ED?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Aug 13 15:13:48 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xl1ff/what_shitty_things_do_you_do_because_of_your_ed/
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[deleted]
[Other] Summer summer summer timeee (then again, I drink these all year round 😉)
/u/screamingfalcon [5'7.5"/171.45cm | CW: 2fat4me | GW: 121 | UGW: 108 | F22]
Created: Sat Aug 13 14:57:49 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xkz1d/summer_summer_summer_timeee_then_again_i_drink/
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http://m.imgur.com/GfpdraF
[Intro] Active for awhile, but now intro'ing
/u/_-TAWat-_ [5'3" | 31F | UGW 110.2#]
Created: Sat Aug 13 13:09:00 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xkhy4/active_for_awhile_but_now_introing/
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Alright. I haven't posted an official "intro" - but I've been active on this sub for a couple months now.
I was hospitalized in my teens for a severe depressive episode leading me down the dark path of SH/ED. I had the choice of either going to juvie or the hospital. I chose the latter. There were only two of us there and, needless to say, I received a lot of one-on-one attention. I was at a healthy weight for my height (5'3"|135 - participated in a lot of sports - I was muscular, toned), so they focused more on my behaviors. This was ages ago - no "body positivity" or "HAES" BS. I faked my way through their program, put on a good show for the therapist, and was released within 4 days.
On off-seasons from sports, I would restrict, purge, abuse laxatives and Stacker 2s, and developed a pica for ice. I ate ice *constantly*, even in the dead of winter. I tried to become vegetarian to ward off questions about me being so restrictive with my diet... that only worked for so long, because people started making me vege-friendly meals.
I eventually relied on pain meds to stay thin - as I weaned off of those, I gained. A lot. Meanwhile, I met my ex who was, in his own way, very much a HAES/FA advocate. I fed into the shit by the spoonful for almost 10 years. I got to my HW - 225 - and stuck there for a couple years. Got down to 190 after splitting up with him, then balooned back up when I got with my current BF. ¤
**I became what I dreaded - the token "fat friend"**
¤*(FYI - this was own fault, I'm not blaming either of them. This may be why I'm so against FA/HAES. I realized that I was in no way, shape, or form, healthy at that size.)*
I decided to do something about it earlier this year by trying Keto. I loved the restriction, the control I had over my diet, the excuse I had to not eat certain things, echoing my "vegetarian" stint. I've slowly gotten into the mindset of *this will work much faster if I restrict more*.
I've been flirting with my old ways, teetering on the ledge, and I guess today it finally clicked that I've officially toppled over. I had an anxiety attack at an event because I ate a half sandwich with *gasp* bread. *gasp* carbs. I chugged two litres of water, came home, tried to purge, popped a Stack, and brewed a laxative tea. I had a moment of peace, calm, knowing I could control this - then the realization hit me.
*Hello ED, my old frienemy.*
[Discussion] Penance, and thoughts on calorie counting.
/u/littleone91011 [5'4" | 108 | 18.4 | F |]
Created: Sat Aug 13 12:56:02 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xkftu/penance_and_thoughts_on_calorie_counting/
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Okay, so I'm just a huge jumble of thoughts right now, so I apologize in advance for the wall of text...
I overate horribly all day after a junky lunch yesterday and a b/p on Thursday. I drank like a fish, too. So for now, water and black coffee.
I also had the brilliant idea of weighing myself this morning after basically a day and a half of pure b/p and drinking. I'm up 8.2 pounds. Go me. (I know it's mostly water weight, but still.)
I'm not really sure why I weighed myself this morning. I think because I was feeling like I might binge again today, so maybe I just wanted to shut that idea down by shaming myself.
I want to fast as long as possible today, though dinner tonight will be inevitable. My husband is an absolute darling and is taking me out to dinner, just the two of us. Where we're going is a surprise, which is so cute of him. But I'd be lying if I said I didn't feel anxious about not knowing what the menu and type of cuisine it will be.
Lately I've been feeling a ton of anxiety around numbers. At times counting calories can be incredibly comforting (the numbers just make me feel so safe when I'm restricting well), but the flip side is if I screw up the numbers in any way by eating too much or estimating, I lose my mind. CC can often trigger b/p for me, and so though I've been counting calories recently, in the past I've tried an alternate method of tracking by eating intuitively and keeping a food journal on my phone. I take pictures of everything I eat instead, which keeps me accountable. I also weigh myself almost daily while eating intuitively. Strangely, I'm so much less likely to overeat when I use my little food journal system than when I track calories. Though CC is more effective at helping me lose lots of weight short-term, in the past I have lost weight slowly and kept it off more consistently with my intuitive eating.
This food journal/intuitive eating method worked beautifully over the summer when I was on my honeymoon. I didn't have a data connection, so I couldn't look up calories while on the go, and of course had no access to a scale, which was highly stressful for me. So I had to rely on my intuition and my little journal. My goal was to maintain, and even after 3 weeks of (very small portions of) rich food and drinks, I didn't gain an ounce. I was absolutely incredulous of this, and weighed myself (no exaggeration) 20 times over the course of a couple days when we got back just to be sure, haha!
But as soon as we got back from our honeymoon, I had an incredible urge to count calories again. Maybe because of the anxiety I had around not weighing myself while we were gone made me want to focus really carefully on numbers? Either way, it's been a few weeks since we've been home and clearly the calorie counting method hasn't been working great, as evidenced by yesterday's b/p.
I haven't decided if I'm going to count calories today, particularly given yesterday's dismal episode. But I think the hard caloric numbers are causing me to binge. Like, if I know I'm eating a meal that will be hard to track accurately, or if I know that what I'll eat will cause me to go over my limit, I get this sort of “fuck it,” attitude and eat everything I've been craving instead of just eating rich foods slowly and intuitively. I just pull the pin on that grenade when I go over a calorie limit.
I ate amazingly on my honeymoon, all said. Sure, I didn't lose, but the fact that I didn't gain at all is still unbelievable to me. So maybe I need to get back into the groove of eating intuitively and weighing myself every morning? That way I can still hold myself accountable with some kind of number, and can rein it in if I need to.
I know that not counting calories will probably slow my progress, but at least my progress will be consistent. I'm always way less likely to b/p if I'm not counting.
Maybe I could do a combination? Like, count calories if I'm feeling high anxiety around my weight, and keep a food journal on the days that I know tracking will be hard? Ugh. I don't know. Anyone else experience this? Any advice? What should I do?
Anyway. Just some thoughts. For now, coffee and Powerade Zero.
[Thinspo] Weekend Inspiration (the tiny and adorable Ashe Maree)
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Aug 13 12:41:28 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xkdhn/weekend_inspiration_the_tiny_and_adorable_ashe/
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http://imgur.com/a/0zw1h
[Rant/Rave] Today it hit me that I might actually have a problem
/u/FakingReallyWell [5'5.5" | 134 lbs | 22.1 | -22 lbs | F]
Created: Sat Aug 13 12:17:51 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xk9s2/today_it_hit_me_that_i_might_actually_have_a/
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Today was supposed to be a fast day. I lasted till around 5pm (with the help of Monster, ephedrine, caffeine pills, glucomannan powder, garcinia pills and green tea extract). By that point I was getting really clumsy (kept walking into things and dropping things), I felt really light headed when I stood up, and just generally didn't feel well.
Despite feeling physically awful, the thought of breaking my fast made me so anxious and panicky. Up until now, I've always felt like it was my decision to skip meals or b/p and I could eat normally whenever I wanted and be fine with it. I guess that's not really the case. I feel like such an idiot.
I fasted for almost 24 hours and broke my fast with a courgette, fat free cottage cheese and porridge and still feel like a failure. Why is my brain so illogical about stuff like this? It's so rational about everything in life except the way I see myself.
In celebration of hitting my UGW here's the before and after I've been saving
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Aug 13 10:42:38 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xju2a/in_celebration_of_hitting_my_ugw_heres_the_before/
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http://imgur.com/a/hDvwh
[Discussion] Daily Food Diary! August 13, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Sat Aug 13 10:02:16 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xjnnv/daily_food_diary_august_13_2016/
---
This is a daily food diary thread for August 13, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
[Goal] These legs are amazing.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Aug 13 09:59:28 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xjn9f/these_legs_are_amazing/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/e82a43189b764366a213ffae615bd1fd?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=5e706e0fb46ecb6bc9a21c20ffdad9f5
[Rant/Rave] DAE get really miffed when your plans get messed with?
/u/sorryqueen [5'2" | a boulder | F]
Created: Sat Aug 13 09:26:35 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xji8t/dae_get_really_miffed_when_your_plans_get_messed/
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Long story short, my little brother and I were supposed to grab lunch and spend time together today, but he slept in instead and didn't tell me about it and won't make it until later. My plan was to go get lunch and then not eat dinner. However, now I have to eat lunch with my boyfriend, since he's hungry AND get dinner with my brother. Not only that but I'm super pissed that he didn't respect my time. I had planned a day for us and now it's already half way over and he's still not here. Please tell me I'm not alone!
These Legs
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Aug 13 09:08:03 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xjfkk/these_legs/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/e47b3641eab34d99a8c727e38b24b4c8?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=43c481c754f11cbab27dd50ca7cff2f9
[Goal] The day is here. I'm terrified still.
/u/Nude-prude [5"6.5 | 105 lbls | 16.68|-40| female]
Created: Sat Aug 13 08:28:21 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xj9vh/the_day_is_here_im_terrified_still/
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http://imgur.com/skrYCYL
[Other] First week out of hospital.
/u/PREDATORA [175cm | CW: 65kg | GW: 55kg | M]
Created: Sat Aug 13 08:17:20 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xj8cm/first_week_out_of_hospital/
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And I've slipped back into my ultra depressive state, I know weigh 65kg, almost 10kg more than I did when I was admitted, I still have very low bodyfat% but my extremely hard worked for abs are pretty faded (but I'm working on them again) and my horrible insomnia has returned immediately after ceasing the medication they gave me for sleep.
I'm going to get back under 60kg, it's not something I want to do, I need to do it to even go through every day without stressing about every single piece of food. I know that if I do that though I'll probably be re-admitted and even though my experience in hospital wasn't necessarily bad I can't go back, I can't handle dropping weight and having to put it back on all over again so I'm pretty stuck at the moment.
Right now I'm eating around 2000 calories a day but tomorrow I'll go back down to my diet of 1200 calories a day which I had before hospital. My body was my biggest accomplishment, it was a testament to my hard work and determination, it got me noticed, now I'm back to being a nobody, I don't want to be a nobody again.
[Discussion] does anyone else get nauseous just at seeing the word "binge"?
/u/turnonmyrighthand [4'9 | 86lb | F]
Created: Sat Aug 13 07:43:16 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xj3xd/does_anyone_else_get_nauseous_just_at_seeing_the/
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https://www.reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xj3xd/does_anyone_else_get_nauseous_just_at_seeing_the/
[Other] A few words
/u/radiationbloop
Created: Sat Aug 13 07:20:01 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xj162/a_few_words/
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I'm leaving this sub, having lurked for god knows how long. I just wanted to say that everyone's at a different point in their journey--but if you have any desire to recover, this subreddit is not the place to be all up in.
Though restriction gives me a high and happy feeling, there are heavy crashes and unexpected moods, and generally I am fueled by dislike for feeling "bloated" or "gross" or god forbid "fat." Discomfort and some times disgust with my body and often myself.
Ultimately, restriction takes away a damn lot of my attentions and opportunities for enjoyment. This sub is all about keeping PC but let's be real momentarily: it's rife with hypocrisy, amidst the positives, and not helping you ever get past this addiction.
Good luck on your journey, to wellness or to thinness. Once again I'm attempting to quit and seek another more stable form of happiness.
[Goal] So pumped!!
/u/WeighingDown [5'2" | 113 | 21.41 | F]
Created: Sat Aug 13 07:07:56 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xizuo/so_pumped/
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I've been restricting really well this month and I have managed to reach my lowest adult weight!! WOO! My collar bones, chest bones, and spine are starting to get even more noticeable. I'm excited to start seeing some hip bones and slimmer thighs. I can't wait until I get to 100 lb. I think I'll be there by the end of September. This is just so exciting. I'm super motivated by this. I hope everyone else is doing well, and if not, I hope you feel better soon.
[Meme/Humor] when you're fasting and someone makes you eat
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Aug 13 06:55:24 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xiyfv/when_youre_fasting_and_someone_makes_you_eat/
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https://i.redd.it/2h89o12zc5fx.jpg
[Meme/Humor] On a binge...
/u/smokesanddietcokes [<3 ]
Created: Sat Aug 13 06:08:06 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xitb5/on_a_binge/
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http://imgur.com/cyMZmel
[Rant/Rave] If there was an Olympic medal for overeating I would be bring home the gold
/u/FaithHopeTrick [5'7 | CW 124 GW 119 |19.35 | -31lbs | F]
Created: Sat Aug 13 03:54:20 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xih6y/if_there_was_an_olympic_medal_for_overeating_i/
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Third weekend in a row. I got to my lowest weight ever on Thursday and then I was off work yesterday and ate so much food with my SO. We both felt sick from how much we ate. I had close to 4,000 calories and now I've gained 4lbs. At least 1lbs 1.5lbs is fat I know the rest is water but GODDAMN it. Friends arriving for the weekend any moment I MUST resist all the food they are gonna want to eat. I won't be able to fast round them but no way am I having more than soup or salad.
FML. Rant/rave on mobile
UPDATE: binged again today, ~5,000 calories, I hate myself and it's taking everything I've got not to hurt myself. Back on track tomorrow 100%
[Help] Google drive with ED books?
/u/Melusedek [173 | CW: 58.9 | GW: 56.8 | 19.68/19.45 | F]
Created: Sat Aug 13 03:49:03 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xigqz/google_drive_with_ed_books/
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I saw a post a little while ago mentioning that there was a google drive link with a bunch of books about EDs. Would someone be able to send me the link?
[Help] Weight loss through food poisoning - is it "real" or just water?
/u/skinnypod [5'6" | 121 | 19.8 | F]
Created: Sat Aug 13 03:42:29 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xig6r/weight_loss_through_food_poisoning_is_it_real_or/
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Hullo all
So since Friday morning I have, to be blunt, been trapped in the bathroom with some sort of food poisoning/stomach flu.
Gross.
On the plus side I'm now down to 118. I was 122 Thursday night.
I've been trying to drink lots of water and hot honey and lemon (and eating the occasional cracker when I feel up to eat).
How "real" do you think this weight loss is? Is is just dehydration and it'll all come back once I am no longer trapped on the loo?
Entertain me in my miserable existence...
PS tips for helping to keep it from coming back (real or not) very much welcome
[Other] I've become scarily good at portion control.
/u/commtra [5'7 | GW:110 | -11 | F]
Created: Sat Aug 13 01:50:43 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xi6l4/ive_become_scarily_good_at_portion_control/
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Slowly but surely I've tried to divide everything I eat into smaller portions so every meal would be under 100cal.
I had a coffee drink which lasted for 3 mornings, my low fat yogurt has lasted me for 2 mornings so far and there's more than half of it left.
Saves money and I can sometimes allow myself to have junkier food, just have to cut it smaller lol
Not really themed towards anything but I'm just very proud of myself, I never thought I'd be able to control myself like this.
edit:: thank u for flairing this I still don't have a laptop sorry!!
[Rant/Rave] Recovery: can't, shouldn't, won't.
/u/Dr0pDex [172cm | 45.3kg | 15.04]
Created: Sat Aug 13 01:39:50 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xi5go/recovery_cant_shouldnt_wont/
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I eat and live about as healthily as you can with an eating disorder. I'm not that tiny. I'm not trying to lose weight anymore. I refuse to let go of everything I've worked so *fucking* hard to achieve.
My mom has tried to push me into it repeatedly, but she always holds back. I think she knows I'm not ready.
What she might not know is I'll never be ready.
[Other] Not sure if any of you already saw this or not, but I came across it yesterday and I find it a HUGE motivator.
/u/TemporaryAccount_101 [5'3'' | AHAHAH | -5.5kgs | 18F]
Created: Sat Aug 13 01:33:10 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xi4ta/not_sure_if_any_of_you_already_saw_this_or_not/
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=movP42hZra4
I hate my fucking life.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Aug 13 01:17:11 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xi39z/i_hate_my_fucking_life/
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http://imgur.com/vQaYLZP
[Discussion] Living with your significant other?
/u/Alice_Rebel [5'10" | 129.2 | 18.07 | -0.8 | Trans F]
Created: Sat Aug 13 00:46:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xi08o/living_with_your_significant_other/
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I recently moved in with my SO. She's amazing in a lot of ways. For better or worse shes acutely aware of my ED. We share food, and since i'm unemployed and she works from home it's extremely hard to eat smaller portions, let alone, not eat at all. Since this is my first post, i should add a bit of background. I went to treatment last year while we were dating and did a couple of family sessions. I've pretty consistently been at this since I was 19, but now i want to really try to get back down to my pre-18 weight if at all possible.
Any tips/advice/words of wisdom?
[Discussion] Something weird is happening here.
/u/canwefloat [5'5 | 112 | - 19 lbs | F]
Created: Fri Aug 12 22:46:28 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xho2d/something_weird_is_happening_here/
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I don't know if it's an influx of new people, changing feelings, or honestly if I'm just now noticing it.
But people are posting a lot of pictures of themselves. Like, a literal shit ton in the past week alone.
This is fine, whatever. But the feeling I get from them isn't of struggling daily with an ED. It's the kind of progress pictures you see on fitness subreddits, or r/1200isplenty and r/keto. It's perceived by me as a kind of "look at how my diet is going" post.
I'm not saying these people don't have eating disorders. I've posted pictures and know people who have 100% legitimate EDs that post as well. But they're usually relegated to the progress/update threads here. I don't know why that seemed to have stopped.
All I'm saying is it's hard to come to this safe place when I've had a bad day food-wise, and every other post is "look at how my thighs are coming along!" or "my stomach looks so flat today!". I know this is different for everyone, but I am so deeply mortified by my body I have deleted every picture I've taken of it within 30 seconds. The other side of this is that a bunch of random girls are pretty much posting themselves as "thinspo", which also has its own sub.
I mean, this is why I thought we had those progress threads in the first place.
Any thoughts? Am I just totally missing the mark?
[Discussion] Does anyone else feel too fat to be browsing this subreddit? How do you deal with it?
/u/BVBreallover [168cm | CW: 52kg | BMI: 18,4 | SW: 70kg | F]
Created: Fri Aug 12 21:58:10 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xhilw/does_anyone_else_feel_too_fat_to_be_browsing_this/
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Seeing all these low BMI stats from other users makes me feel really fat. Am I really the only one? If not, how do you handle it?
EDIT: I deleted the part that came across as rude to some of you. It wasn't meant to be rude, I apologize if you felt it that way
[Rant/Rave] Water weight plus binging.... And a bf who triggered binging.... Ughhh. :/
/u/TiredOfBeingFat_
Created: Fri Aug 12 21:01:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xhbro/water_weight_plus_binging_and_a_bf_who_triggered/
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I was 256 last week, down fifteen pounds in about three weeks. This week I have been binging like crazy since school started, and my water weight pre period bloats me up at least ten pounds... I usually shed it the day I start my period and I'm going to be heartbroken if it doesn't go back down and I've really gained ten pounds back in a week... I've been eating a lot, but I don't think I've been eating over two thousand with the exception of today and yesterday...
Also my boyfriend blew up on me the other night about me not eating enough and purging when I did eat out of fear. I then binged with him until I was physically sick and it all came back up, I didn't even have to gag myself. It came up on it's own... Then he got mad at me again. :(
I suck at water fasting, but I'm going to attempt to do a fast using chicken and beef bouillon cube soup fast today and maybe the next day... I was doing so good and it all goes down hill. I'm so ready for my adderall prescription to come in so I can cut my apitite down... Any tips for fasting?
[Goal] size zero?!?!?!?! The last time I could wear size 0 was in seventh grade guys. I'm 21 now.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Aug 12 20:53:12 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xhall/goal_size_zero_the_last_time_i_could_wear_size_0/
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http://imgur.com/pMOj4us
[Meme/Humor] Restriction problems [humour]
/u/sveltevelvet [5"8 | GW: 105-115 | -16 lbs | 18F]
Created: Fri Aug 12 19:49:43 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xh1on/restriction_problems_humour/
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Stocking up on fresh, low cal food on sale at the supermarket but having it go out of date because it doesn't fit into your calorie budget.
[Discussion] Binge-stoppers
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Aug 12 19:10:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xgw3w/bingestoppers/
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[deleted]
[Thinspo] Reverse Thinspo (TW): Half Ton Killer
/u/kpatable [5'9" | 125.1 | 18.1/18.5 | -21.9 | F]
Created: Fri Aug 12 17:30:27 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xghzv/reverse_thinspo_tw_half_ton_killer/
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RXXjBVC2-PA
[Thinspo] Cat mugs & Collarbones (work in progress)
/u/Voodoo0925 [5'3" | 130.0lbs | 23.0 | -30 | female]
Created: Fri Aug 12 17:10:32 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xgex7/cat_mugs_collarbones_work_in_progress/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/a84ae53a3c6445e38875c11e5df87e71?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=277dd2ce134a527f5aed14449a2f722d
[Help] Nausea when restricting -- help?
/u/thinismygame [5'6" | 148 | F]
Created: Fri Aug 12 16:45:26 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xgaum/nausea_when_restricting_help/
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Hey all. I've been really good these last three days, eating around 250kcal. Clearly three days isn't a long amount, but it seems that the first week without a binge makes me BEYOND nauseous. Anyone else have this? I threw up today after eating five cherries and am still feeling unbearably sick. Any tips? Help? Anyone else gone through the same thing? I am mentally able to do this but God, physically I feel like shit.
Thanks <3
[Intro] [intro] hello, any other introverts?
/u/littleIceBear [4' 10" | 99 | F]
Created: Fri Aug 12 16:31:44 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xg8o0/intro_hello_any_other_introverts/
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Ive watched this sub for ages, but i feel like this is just another place i wont fit/be welcome :/ i love how youre all supportive to one another.
Aside of my ED i have crippling social anxiety and BDD and its been a forever thing. I have no contact with my family..abusive.. And no real friends. I live in the middle of nowhere and i like the isolation. I sometimes wish i knew how to be like you people, and just jump in and be comfy talking.
Im here because i feel better when i help others and i feel like maybe not so worthless after all. X
[Help] HELP! CHEESE TASTING!
/u/throwaway03199519 [5'6 | CW 119.4 | GW 110| 19.35| -16.6 | F]
Created: Fri Aug 12 16:25:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xg7o3/help_cheese_tasting/
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So I'm going to a cheese tasting AND going out to dinner (yay for YET AGAIN more spontaneous plans w the bf!) how do I deal with this? I'll probably get a chicken salad at whatever restaurant we go to, but we also got wine so that'll be a killer too. I'm mostly worried about trying to figure out how to low the cheeses I eat and not overeat on them! I wanna stay under 1000 cal for the day and I had around 250 already. If anyone has any suggestions to help this go a lot smoother please let me know!
[Help] Sort of forced maintenance
/u/amyrj28 [Height: 157cm | CW: 6st 7lbs | BMI: 16.7 | F]
Created: Fri Aug 12 15:57:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xg304/sort_of_forced_maintenance/
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Hi guys. Not sure how many of you saw my post last week about my care coordinator trying to get me referred to the ED team, but I currently do not meet the criteria for them, because my weight is now actually low enough yet for them to become involved, which I'm glad of because I really did not want to be referred to them, and she was also talking of hospitalisation if my weight gets much lower.
So I had a psychiatrist visit yesterday, that she made for me as an emergency because my mood has gotten pretty low, my meds aren't working, and my anxiety has been through the roof with all this talk of forcing me to eat and referrals against my will etc, and anyway he said he will be happy for the moment if I just agree to maintain my weight for the time being to stop it getting to the point where I will be referred or hospitalised against my will because my bmi needs to be at 15 for that to happen, and I think i'm currently at 16.4. I also had a dietician appointment today, and she drafted a sample meal plan for me, and said that to maintain i'd need to eat 1800 cals daily. I mean, it seems pretty high to me lol? I'm concerned that eating that much is going to make me gain weight. I work 5 days a week (43 hrs) in a retail job, so i'm constantly on my feet there, working delivery and tidying up etc, and I walk a mile to work every day, and a mile home 3 times a week, I also walk a mile each way to my weekly care coordinator appts, and basically walk anywhere I need to get because I don't drive, but my 2 days off work are pretty much lazy days, and if I don't have to go anywhere I do nothing lol. Does that amount of calories seem about right? I'm just worried that she's made it too high to make me think it's ok to eat it but then I'll put weight on which is what they all really want anyway.
She has also said that I don't have to start eating that amount right away, I can ease into it, and I have a plan for that anyway, but because I've been restricting heavily (between 500-700 cals) mostly now every day since October, surely eating 1800 cals now will make me gain weight?
I'm still unsure about maintaining if I'm honest, but I also don't want to be forced into an ED team referral or a hospital admission either, so I don't really have much of a choice right now but to do as they ask and try to maintain, and maybe it won't be a bad thing anyway. Every time I reach my GW I change the goal posts anyway, and when is it ever going to be enough for me anyway? And I am struggling more physically now since I've gone under the 7st (100lbs) mark. They are talking about weight gain further down the track, but there is no way that is happening lol. The only reason I'm willing to maintain for now is to keep them off my back really, and for health reasons too I guess. I have other physical and mental health issues that an ED isn't helping, and the more weight I lose, the worse they all get.
Anyway, sorry this turned into a bit of an essay but I'd appreciate any advice, knowledge and/or kind words at the moment. I'm feeling pretty out of control and low and very anxious about everything :(
[Discussion] Does anyone feel not thin enough to participate in the selfie/ootd thread? Me too!
/u/sewnp [168cm | GW:90lbs | NB]
Created: Fri Aug 12 15:44:51 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xg0wx/does_anyone_feel_not_thin_enough_to_participate/
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On mobile, flair as discussion.
[Discussion] Does anyone else NOT track calories?
/u/cinamintoast [5'6" | 209 | 33.87 | -61 | F]
Created: Fri Aug 12 15:41:56 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xg0ep/does_anyone_else_not_track_calories/
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I don't keep track of them at all, other than rough approximations for my individual meals or glancing at the nutrition facts if I'm eating something with a label. I focus more on restricting my portions and how often I eat (I usually fast 2 days a week and have 2 small meals a day on the days I do eat). I don't know how y'all do it.
tfw your pants don't fit but you have huge hips 😛
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Aug 12 15:38:38 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xfzvk/tfw_your_pants_dont_fit_but_you_have_huge_hips/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/1f7a8d5e080648938b2493f40bab5cfb?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=43c3af38b685a15f4d040bf6101fec57
[Tip] Thanks to whoever mentioned Mashed Potatoes as a safe food.
/u/madamdepompadour
Created: Fri Aug 12 15:38:31 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xfzuy/thanks_to_whoever_mentioned_mashed_potatoes_as_a/
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For 160 cals for two serving, it is very filling and quick to make. And I like the way it tastes so win win. I add a diced chicken sausage, 80 cals per link, for a filling and tasty meal that totals 240 cals.
One of my challenges with eating low cal is I must enjoy it, and it should be easy/quick. Sandwiches can fit the bill if you use low cal bread, but it bloats me.
[Discussion] Why I'm fucked up: the TeacupGirl story
/u/TeaCupGirl [5'8" | CW 124.8lbs | 19 | -15.2lbs |]
Created: Fri Aug 12 15:18:56 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xfwlx/why_im_fucked_up_the_teacupgirl_story/
---
So I'm staying with my parents sans my live in boyfriend for a week. which is normally terrible because my childhood, like many of ours, was extremely fucked, but I'm loving it because the stress from being around my mom, not having to go to work, and not being with my bf is giving me that final push to really start restricting again. Its a "thincation".
What lengths have you all gone to to restrict? Also hi again, posted here a bit ago but deleted it all in a frantic recovery effort. Which clearly did not work.
[Other] I want to share my favorite song with you lovelies.
/u/tinyme23 [5'3" | 146 | 25.9 | -25 lbs | F]
Created: Fri Aug 12 14:41:56 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xfq7z/i_want_to_share_my_favorite_song_with_you_lovelies/
---
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hvMKIQAymGk
[Help] I seem to have lost all patience.
/u/mindgamesbodygames [5'4'' | going down]
Created: Fri Aug 12 14:33:04 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xfol5/i_seem_to_have_lost_all_patience/
---
I'm miserable. I'm so, so, so, so fucking miserable. These last few weeks I've become painfully aware of just how fat I really am, and I can't stand myself. I've become so reclusive because I can't stand the idea of showing myself in public, especially around all of my drop dead gorgeous, hot as shit, skinny trap queen friends. Not a word of a lie, I am the DUFF In my friend group.
I am wasting away my summer. I wish I had a fast forward button so I could go ahead three months and -20 pounds. I'm on the right track, the scale is going down, but how do you find the patience to trust the process? How do I pass the time while losing weight without feeling like I'm wasting my life? Maybe there is no solution, because in reality I am wasting my life (el oh el).
[Rant/Rave] Texted my friends from uni that I lost weight over the summer...
/u/realbutterflybaby [5'1" | CW: 105±1 GW: 88±1 | -26 lbs | F]
Created: Fri Aug 12 14:26:14 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xfnbk/texted_my_friends_from_uni_that_i_lost_weight/
---
They got excited to see the difference and I suddenly got anxious that they wouldn't even notice a difference since I am STILL fat, but now I suddenly have this boost of motivation to end my binge cycle and haven't eaten all day! Don't even feel hungry! :) :) If I keep this up I might lose a good amount over the next 2 weeks before I see them :) :) :) :) :)
[Rant/Rave] Everything is bigger in Texas. Tw: lots of food.
/u/_pizzagirl [5'5 | 131.5lbs | 22.14 | -23.1 | f]
Created: Fri Aug 12 13:56:18 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xfhsd/everything_is_bigger_in_texas_tw_lots_of_food/
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Ughhhh. Omg. I work at an office in Texas at a wealth management firm so we always have tons of "meetings" and excuses to eat.
There was a big training today and they dropped the breakfast and snacks they didn't eat off.
I'm trying so hard to continue my restriction and be good. Today I have had 1 tortilla chip dipped in yogurt ranch and 3 strawberries. And a bite of halo top. Ive been eating only dinner all week and just small portions of chicken and a grain for dinner. I've restricting heavy right now for Halloween. I'm at 136.7 down from 154 at 5'5. But there's just so much food just 20 feet away
Chocolate pies
Cream cheese danishes
Apple pie
Chips and dip
Strawberries, pineapple, melon
Sugary coffee drinks
Peanut butter sandwiches
Pretzels and hummus
PIZZA
I don't even know what else, but I just want it all sooooo badly and I'm already resisting the urge to b/p
Sigh
[Thinspo] What's your favorite thinspo?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Fri Aug 12 13:27:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xfc8f/whats_your_favorite_thinspo/
---
[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] Binging due to lack of sleep :(
/u/yummmies [5'4" | 130 | -35 | F]
Created: Fri Aug 12 13:21:04 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xfb32/binging_due_to_lack_of_sleep/
---
It's like I can't stop eating today. A lot of things are happening his week and I haven't been able to keep up with my restriction and now this. :( It was so hot last night and I slept maybe 4 hours and I kept waking up and I didn't get to drink my morning tea. Right now I'm dozing off at work and eating so much, but I can't bring myself to care or stop because I'm so tired. Ugh :(
[Help] How to get an EC stack in Northern California!?
/u/trapqueenB [5'4 | 134 lb | 23 | -30 lb | F/22]
Created: Fri Aug 12 13:19:37 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xfatf/how_to_get_an_ec_stack_in_northern_california/
---
halpppp
bronkaid isn't available anywhere here
[Rant/Rave] Today is my Birthday. Wish me luck.
/u/ForeverEmptyInside [5'9"| CW:133 lbs | BMI 19.6 | LW:104lbs | M]
Created: Fri Aug 12 13:16:07 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xfa5m/today_is_my_birthday_wish_me_luck/
---
Hey everyone,
Today is my birthday and so far it's been going great. The only thing is that I am surrounded by a ton of food, especially sweets, such as cake. I can't deny it without the people close to me getting suspicious. It's stressing me out a bit but I know I will be able to lose it all in the future.
On a side note, I only have a little over two weeks of therapy left, and then I am home free to lose as much weight as I want. I just gotta keep up the facade until then.
I'm a little anxious about eating "unsafe" junk food - please send good vibes my way.
Hope you guys are having a good day.
[Discussion] Short favourite foods survey!
/u/macchiato- [5'5'' | 114 lbs | 19.19 | 19F]
Created: Fri Aug 12 12:56:05 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xf6co/short_favourite_foods_survey/
---
I'm bored with nothing to do, and I love surveys! Sorry if this makes you hungry:) Just copy/paste and fill in your answers.
**Favorite...**
fruit:
snack:
breakfast pastry:
italian food:
chinese takeout dish:
spread:
meal from childhood:
birthday treat (e.g. best birthday cake you ever had, or pie or cookie!):
pancakes, crepes, waffles or french toast?:
toppings for said fav?:
[Discussion] What are your unexpected binge triggers?
/u/Thunder2WonderThighs
Created: Fri Aug 12 12:36:44 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xf2nf/what_are_your_unexpected_binge_triggers/
---
I realized that artificially sweetened drinks and gum are a binge trigger for me, so I threw them all out. Fasting effortlessly all day so far!
What are some things that you found were unexpected binge triggers for you?
[Rant/Rave] Mom accused me of having an ED
/u/bumblebatty [5'7| 117 | 18.26 | -53 | F | GW 115 | UGW 108?]
Created: Fri Aug 12 11:42:01 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xertn/mom_accused_me_of_having_an_ed/
---
I wish I never ever told them about my having an ED in the past. I just didn't think I'd be back here. Might be my biggest regret.
I'm not even that thin and I've been eating normally around them and maintaining so wtf.
My mom has control issues. Based on my reaction to this, I'm thinking this is one of the major contributors if not the biggest contributor to me having an ED in high school, because I couldn't really pin down the why but I've always had issues with my mom controlling me.
So it's not like she said that she was concerned or whatever. No. She's accusatory, saying she'll pay for a therapist, again not in a helpful offer way but a controlling, "you WILL do this" sort of way and just being angry and all that. I feel like a naughty child that is going to be punished. I'm an adult in my late 20s.
So yeah, her treating me like I'm a child she can control. I was shaking from it and then had a panic attack that I haven't had in years. And I never felt more like wanting to restrict than from this (but have to wait to lose much until after wedding because stupid big dress -- seriously driving me really nuts now).
And now I'm even more self conscious about my body and eating habits, covering up more when I was finally feeling better about wearing more revealing clothing in the summer heat. We were going to go swimming but now I don't want to be in a swimsuit.
I'm not even that thin.
Ugh whatever. I'll just be silently miserable and uncomfortable even more now.
Oh and I got my obsessive compulsive tendencies, perfectionism, and alcohol abuse and addiction issues from my mom. So she's the genetic source and trigger for all this mess in one neat little package. Thanks for that.
[Thinspo] Snack time (skinny cans look so classy)
/u/Nude-prude [5"6.5 | 105 lbls | 16.68|-40| female]
Created: Fri Aug 12 11:20:30 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xenqx/snack_time_skinny_cans_look_so_classy/
---
http://imgur.com/vWbf7zj
[Discussion] How much weight loss before people notice? (And how do you distract yourself when restricting?)
/u/lifetc
Created: Fri Aug 12 10:32:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xeeng/how_much_weight_loss_before_people_notice_and_how/
---
Hey guys, how much weight loss do you find people start to notice? I'm trying to remember from before my 'recovery phase.' I remember that a 15lbs loss was generally enough to get someone to go 'wow' if they haven't seen you. Do you think 10lbs would be enough for someone to notice, even if they don't necessarily say anything?
Bonus question because I didn't want to make a new thread - what are five things you do to distract yourself when you're restricting? Mine are writing, sleeping, video games, going to the cinema, and going to the gym.
EDIT: Thanks for all the responses people :) Noticing a lot of people saying the weight noticing thing changed on depending on where you started. I guess maybe it's more likely to connected to something like measurement changes (or clothing sizes?), or possibly BMI numbers - like, going down 2.0 BMI is going to stand out probably no matter where you're coming from? Thanks y'all :)
(I'm just asking because, you know, targets and everything - I know what my UGW is but having a goal that feels achievable for the week is helpful too... Whether it's moving into a new kg number, or a round lb number, or a new BMI grad, it all helps.)
[Discussion] Melatonin for sleeping?
/u/Nude-prude [5"6.5 | 105 lbls | 16.68|-40| female]
Created: Fri Aug 12 10:31:13 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xeecl/melatonin_for_sleeping/
---
How's it work for you?
[Help] Does anyone else have short temper / little patience when not eating and EC stacking?
/u/cheeekyslug [5'6" | UGW: 90 | -60 lbs since 6/20/16 | 19/F]
Created: Fri Aug 12 10:13:07 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xeayw/does_anyone_else_have_short_temper_little/
---
I work with people all day and it's the worst. I feel like one day someone is going to complain about how I snap when I have to repeat myself twice or showing passive aggressiveness. I loooove fasting, but as soon as someone fucking gets on my nerves it makes me trigger into eating.
This is especially true when I'm EC stacking. I'm trying to reduce my caffeine intake but it's the only way I keep myself from getting hungry.I noticed if I just go with water and sprint 10 miles then I get very weak and tired, and no one likes to yell at someone who's quiet and motionless. The thing is I can still get work done while I'm weak, it's just my body that is weak, and I typically can't pick up a pencil off the ground. I actually feel more productive while fasting because my mind feels so free and clear.
Anyone have tips to keep yourself calm while suppressing hunger?
[Discussion] Daily Food Diary! August 12, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Fri Aug 12 10:02:42 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xe91t/daily_food_diary_august_12_2016/
---
This is a daily food diary thread for August 12, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
[Rant/Rave] Fiancée said that for every pound of weight I try to lose he's going to lose the same amount.
/u/ooo5936 [5'6" | 124.2lbs | GW: 115 | -8.6lbs | F]
Created: Fri Aug 12 09:37:24 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xe4dl/fiancée_said_that_for_every_pound_of_weight_i_try/
---
I just need to stop telling him things about my weight loss goals. It's none of his business. I'm not losing weight for him. I'm losing weight so I can be comfortable and proud of my body. He's going to get frustrated as hell and he's tall, lean, and everything I wish to be. I love you, but just let me have this to myself from now on.
On mobile. Will flair later.
[Rant/Rave] I quit my job
/u/woollyshirt [172cm | 54.7kg | 18.33 | -33.3kg | NB/M]
Created: Fri Aug 12 09:06:42 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xdyzw/i_quit_my_job/
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Kind of annoyed because I had a maintenance day yesterday with work today in mind, but overall I think this is for the best. It was a very physical job and it's been increasingly hard to do it while restricting, but I made it work. My thoughts now are about how much easier it is to restrict and fast now I don't have that to work around but I also know it'll be easier to maintain my weight at 55kg when I'm not working my ass off and needing to eat an extra however many calories.
It'll also be easier for me to focus on strength workouts and building muscle when I don't have to feel like I'm saving energy for work. It would be nice if I could find a job that treated me well, because this one didn't, and I stuck around for the good pay until they tried to touch that too...luckily this was only part time for extra cash so I have no bills to pay but it was nice to have my own income separate from my parents.
It's weird how my ED is a secret factor in all decisions in my life even if other people don't realise it. Everyone thinks I'm quitting because the terms of the job have changed but I feel like this is just the excuse I was looking for to make things easier for my ED brain....
[Discussion] Thigh gaps
/u/Jackysuave [5'4" | 136 | 23.34 | F]
Created: Fri Aug 12 08:17:51 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xdqo5/thigh_gaps/
---
[removed]
[Rant/Rave] Whining because plumbing is screwed up in neigborhood
/u/rachelcoiling [5'5" | 148 | 24.74 | -61 | F]
Created: Fri Aug 12 07:50:56 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xdm6j/whining_because_plumbing_is_screwed_up_in/
---
A main sewer line busted in the alley behind our house, and we've been advised to "use as little water as possible" until they can get it fixed, or it'll make the flooding problem exponentially worse in our stone cellar. I have zero issues using the shower/facilities at the gym and work; I really don't mind that part...
I'm just super irked that this throws a wrench in my daily morning **pee-strip-and-weigh-in** ritual.
*edit*
What do you do when your routine gets messed up like this? All I want to do is pout, but it's honestly got me genuinely distressed.
[Discussion] Why do I feel less hungry after days of higher restriction than when I'm eating normally? [discussion]
/u/Obesetothin [5'4" | 129| 22.16 | 75| F]
Created: Fri Aug 12 07:40:22 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xdkeu/why_do_i_feel_less_hungry_after_days_of_higher/
---
So I've been bouncing back and forth between periods of eating at maintenance, which is about 1600-2000 for me because I'm really active, and then heavy restriction. I swear when I'm eating at maintenance, I'm always hungry! By noon, my stomach is aching for food. I stepped on the scale last Saturday and was at 131, so knew it was time to start restricting. I've been at 300-500 calories a day for intake since Sunday, along with exercising every day, and the feeling of hunger has just kind of gone away? I'm down 5 pounds (water weight whoosh FTW) I feel like I could do this for months! Has anyone else experienced this?
[Rant/Rave] Came into work to a desk full of bagels
/u/thelonelykitten_
Created: Fri Aug 12 07:28:47 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xdigv/came_into_work_to_a_desk_full_of_bagels/
---
My coworkers brought bagels in to work today and they're all sitting on the desk next to me. I'm weak and had one so it looks like I'll be skipping lunch/maybe dinner. :(
[Other] Finding comfort in my ED after breaking up with my boyfriend
/u/okaysivan [5'3" | f | ∞ lbs.]
Created: Fri Aug 12 06:45:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xdc0n/finding_comfort_in_my_ed_after_breaking_up_with/
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So, we haven't technically broken up yet, but it's in the works. It's sad and I'll miss him, but I think I feel secretly happy about it. I knew he was into fat girls since we started dating, but I learned a little while ago that he has a "feeder" fetish, as in it gets him off knowing that his partner gains weight, which is almost funny in a way considering I have an eating disorder and want nothing more than to be pretty and skinny. And now that we're breaking up, I feel like I can finally be free to achieve my goals. Besides, I'm sure that when I am actually pretty and skinny I could find plenty better guys who would want to date me.
[Discussion] Weekly Selfie, Progress Pic and OOTD Thread! August 12, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Fri Aug 12 06:03:18 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xd5wm/weekly_selfie_progress_pic_and_ootd_thread_august/
---
This is the weekly picture thread for August 12, 2016.
Feel free to share your selfies, progress pics or outfit-of-the-day (OOTD) pics in this thread!
**Rules**
1. Be nice, **or you will be banned.**
2. Please use [imgur](http://imgur.com/) as a host.
**Remember that anyone can view the contents of this thread even if they are banned from this subreddit. If you receive unwanted messages, please contact the mods with a screenshot of the relevant messages. Note that even if we ban people, they can still message you, and they still have access to the contents of this subreddit. The best thing for you to do is to block them.**
Consider adding commentary on featured brands, sizing, inspiration behind your OOTD (trying to look thin or cover up weightloss, etc.)!
^Selfie, ^progress ^pic ^and ^OOTD ^threads ^are ^posted ^every ^Friday.
^Have ^any ^questions ^or ^concerns? ^Comment ^below, ^or [^PM ^the ^mods.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FproED)
[Discussion] What makes someone looks skinny to you?
/u/Tiny_peach [5'3" | 96.3 | 17.53 | -18]
Created: Fri Aug 12 05:23:17 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xd16s/what_makes_someone_looks_skinny_to_you/
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There are some people in my life who just LOOK super skinny/delicate, even if objectively they're not that light or small. I was thinking about the characteristics that help create the impression of slimness...any you can think of?
- long limbs, neck, and fingers
- sharply defined features and an oval or otherwise non-round face
- small, high breasts
- poky bones obviously
- generally sleek grooming
- certain poses and body language...for example casually double-crossed legs (not janky and forced-looking)
[Rant/Rave] Err.. back down to 44kg? After binging. ..Okaylol?
/u/smokesanddietcokes [<3 ]
Created: Fri Aug 12 04:19:29 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xcu59/err_back_down_to_44kg_after_binging_okaylol/
---
Before binge: 44.3kgs
Straight after two biggest binge days: 46.7kgs
Today, still overeating tbh: 44.1kg.
(same gym scale)
wut lol
Okay my best guess is, the time I weighed myself before the binge I had quite a bit of water weight to make 44.3kg (believable, would make sense)
Then, when weighing myself after the biggest bingey part, I had more mass weight, and bloat and more water weight to make 46.7kg.
Then now, I still have a touch of water weight (I can see it), but the 44.1kg is made up of more real weight (I AT LEAST ate enough to put on near on 2lbs of actual mass I swear..).
Either that or eating myself silly burned 0.2kgs. Tbf there was a lot of chewing..
xD
I'm just very glad to actually still be below 45kg (~100lbs, my highest upper limit). Phew..
**Edit**: I celebrated by eating three sugar-free chocolate bars lol. Downside: Calories. Plus side: Realised I liked the lower calorie, lower carb sugar free chocolate just as much as normal chocolate, so will be getting those for Sunday cheat day instead of normal chocolate. Watching my intake for the rest of the day to allow for those calories, hopefully wont go too above my TDEE.
[Other] Hey, I run an ED/thinspo blog. Would it be okay for me to post it here?
/u/lovemyfragilebones [5'2" | 105 | 19.2/19.89 | -5 | gq 19]
Created: Fri Aug 12 02:15:00 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xcig3/hey_i_run_an_edthinspo_blog_would_it_be_okay_for/
---
https://www.reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xcig3/hey_i_run_an_edthinspo_blog_would_it_be_okay_for/
[Discussion] [Binge avoidance] I decided to make a list of the pros of restriction as I sink back into the comfortable familiar swing of it & cravings begin...
/u/fckk [5'4| CW 120lbs | 20.60 | GW 115 | F]
Created: Thu Aug 11 23:16:49 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xbzik/binge_avoidance_i_decided_to_make_a_list_of_the/
---
* when I do eat food while restricting (limited, nutritionally dense foods like fruits, veggies, nuts, plain chicken, etc), it tastes incredible. My body's sense of "sweet" becomes very sensitive to where fruits are a delight and sweetened coffee is a "dessert" and brocolli splashed in A1 sauce tastes exactly like a fat streak and potato.
* I can feel food effect my body. I'm way more aware of food's effect on my body (i.e. - eating an apple and feeling the wave of energy it gives me, feel it wane, and know I'm ready for the next fruit eventually). I enjoy listening to my body and it's cues for the need of energy, NOT enjoyment. I enjoy tracking my nutrient intake (i.e. - iron/magnesium supplements and daily vitamins. A banana when drained, an apple when un-focused, some chicken or greek yogurt for energy and long-term fullness).
* My motivation to go to the gym is through the roof while restricting. I can make it to the gym once, sometimes twice a day. I'm more confident when I feel empty, clean, and thin. I get up on that elliptical and go wild, I lift and do abs openly and for a long time at my leisure. I feel at home at the gym and it's a serious high. When I'm not restricting/binging, I feel sluggish, gross, and ill at the gym. I feel like I'm "so sloppy anyway so fuck working out". I end up not going or going and leaving of anxiety and lack of motivation. I'm getting built as fuck and it's because of my love affair with the gym while restricting.
* The manic episodes. I buzz with a manic energy and desire to be productive. I kill the performance at work, my room is in tip-top shape, and everything is in order or getting accomplished. It's like I popped an addy. Of course, there are points of anxiety and exhaustion, but the manic energy buzz gets so much more done than the horrible binge-funk.
* The desire to take care of your body. When I'm restricting, I give myself long bubble baths and hair-care spa-days and pedicures. I'm attentive to my teeth and my make-up and I feel good, healthy, young, and vivacious. When I'm binging I give up and I feel like a slob.
* I'll edit this post and add more as they come to me. What are your pros of restriction?
7 lbs until my GW !!!
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Aug 11 22:08:53 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xbre1/7_lbs_until_my_gw/
---
[deleted]
[Help] Weight going up even though I'm eating at a deficit?
/u/concuidado [4'11 | 89 lbs | 19.21 | -51| F]
Created: Thu Aug 11 21:49:21 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xbovp/weight_going_up_even_though_im_eating_at_a_deficit/
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I only eat max 350 calories a day and on Sunday I was 93 lbs but I went up to 94.2 since then!!!! I cook most of my food and weigh literally everything. I log every calorie; my vitamins, gum, black coffee. I drink 64 fl of water a day but I also pee so much so it can't be water weight, right? Does this happen to anyone else? I feel so discouraged bc I had planned/tracked to be at 91 lbs at the end of the week bc I go on vacation after :-/
[Discussion] Any of you at the point where you are maintaining? Do you feel like your TDEE is lower than calculators would suggest?
/u/println-Hello_World [5'4 | 115.7 | 20.25 | 21.3 | F]
Created: Thu Aug 11 21:36:34 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xbn4v/any_of_you_at_the_point_where_you_are_maintaining/
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I'm not near that point yet, but I'm afraid once I do maintain I'll never be able to eat over 1200 calories without gaining. I've been eating under that for so long, I'm afraid my metabolism is legitimately compromised. Anyone have experience maintaining? What did/do you maintain at?
[Help] Nutritional yeast?
/u/DenyMyHunger [5'7"| Fat! |GW 140| UGW 112|-7lbs | F]
Created: Thu Aug 11 20:56:35 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xbha3/nutritional_yeast/
---
Hi lovelies! Back on track with my 800 cal days and feeling much better now! Thanks to all the users who reassured me and gave me advice :)
I'm looking into some vegetarian/vegan recipes (for weight loss, I still eat meat occasionally, but usually quorn or meat substitute to save those cals) and there's this "mac and cheese" recipe I'm interested in that looks amazing! It calls for the use of nutritional yeast to give it that cheesy flavour but I'm unsure of cals.I looked it up and the amount called for in the recipe is 170cals! Just for one ingredient. If I follow the recipe as described (by mind over munch on YouTube) but use konjac pasta, it's coming out at 661cals! This seems way too high for a "low fat" recipe! I'm just wondering if anyone has tried it and has any advice on how to lower the cals a bit?
Thanks!
[Help] DAE GET CANKER SORES
/u/Metellyca
Created: Thu Aug 11 20:14:18 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xbax7/dae_get_canker_sores/
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Hey this is my first post so forgive my weirdness but does anyone else who restricts hard core get CANKER SORES?
If so, HOW DO YOU DEAL WITH THEM
literally every time I hardcore restrict (like for instance right now I'm on day 11 of the ABC and I've been doing it perfectly I'm actually v proud of myself) and I have a little canker in my mouth already.
I got them for the first time about a month ago during a really long fast and I found out they can be caused by nutrient deficiencies but lol who cares if I'm losing weight right
Ok that was sarcasm but seriously DAE get these and if so how do you deal with them? Advice?
Thanks guys I love you all so so much <3 <3
[Other] Are any of you on MPA?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Aug 11 20:00:26 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xb8sp/are_any_of_you_on_mpa/
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[deleted]
[Help] What can I use as an appetite suppressant that is neither caffeine nor ephedrine?
/u/couldbefatter [5'2" | 105]
Created: Thu Aug 11 19:37:39 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xb5ec/what_can_i_use_as_an_appetite_suppressant_that_is/
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I need it for nighttime so caffeine won't work, and ephedrine makes me binge for a few days after I take it.
Is there anything I can take to help at night?
[Other] been waiting a long time for this...
/u/AwwwwwSewerBunniis [5'1.5" | CW:124.6 | 22.8 | GW: 105| UGW: 98| f | -5.4lbs]
Created: Thu Aug 11 19:29:59 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xb44s/been_waiting_a_long_time_for_this/
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...5 years, to be exact.
my son starts kindergarten on tuesday. I'm so nervous and excited for him, but I'm also so excited for me! for the first time in five years, I can devote time to exercise without having to worry about being distracted. I can drop him off by 7:45, get home by 8, work out for an hour, and still have hours left to do housework and/or bookkeeping before I have to pick him up. usually, I have to stop what I'm doing to "mom," or sacrifice my heart rate for letting him "help" or exercise with me.
I'm about to lose soooooo much weight!
[Discussion] A little self shaming. Had a total of 2700 calories today. most of that was protein bars. I am now disgustingly bloated and in pain. After and before of today
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Aug 11 19:17:05 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xb23c/a_little_self_shaming_had_a_total_of_2700/
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http://imgur.com/a/pqmYD
[Discussion] Soooo I have a kind of personal question
/u/boneobsessed [5'4" | Sw 173lbs | Cw 158.2lbs | -14 lbs | Gw 95lbs | F]
Created: Thu Aug 11 19:03:00 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xazr3/soooo_i_have_a_kind_of_personal_question/
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What happened with your boobs when you lost weight? :l Sorry if it sounds terrible to ask but I've had really large breasts all my life, they're disproportionate to my body and I have mixed feelings about them. I know that mine shrink a little when I lose weight but I've never lost weight drastically so I'm just curious about what I could possibly have in store. I do plan on having a reduction when I'm at my goal weight but I know that'll be some time next year. Kind of hoping some of the answers will put my mind at ease a bit but I know I'm being overly hopeful. Again, sorry about the strange question!
[Other] "Give me love, give me dreams, give me a good self-esteem..."
/u/verakitty [5'4"|CW 110lbs |18.9 |-10lbs |GW 105 |UGW 99 |F]
Created: Thu Aug 11 18:35:25 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xaus3/give_me_love_give_me_dreams_give_me_a_good/
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https://soundcloud.com/marina-and-the-diamonds/marina-and-the-diamonds-blue-holychild-remix
[Rant/Rave] I don't like chocolate Halo Top :(
/u/strongerthanyouknow [5'5" |145 |24.4 | -12 | F]
Created: Thu Aug 11 18:25:34 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xasff/i_dont_like_chocolate_halo_top/
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If they had labeled it "chocolate malt" and threw in a little malty flavor i'd be in love. But they didn't, and it just tastes like a shitty fudgeschicle.
P.S.
I also don't like shiritaki noodles. Will mail them to an address in the contiguous USA. PM me.
[Intro] Happy to be Here
/u/verakitty [5'4"|CW 110lbs |18.9 |-10lbs |GW 105 |UGW 99 |F]
Created: Thu Aug 11 18:20:44 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xarc0/happy_to_be_here/
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Long-time lurker. Hello to all you lush, light souls!
Over the past few years, this subreddit has meant a world of difference to me. Entertaining the notion of sharing this peculiar part of myself with family or friends, with the exception of a few, was daunting-- What would the consequences be if I were misunderstood, judged, isolated? I waded through whirlpools of conflicting information online, and was frustrated at the void of accessible, accepting forums where you could write freely about having an unapologetic, boogery sobfest at 6pm because you ate 73 calories over your TDEE.
This subreddit became a place of solace, a sacred little corner of the internet where I was less of an alien. Reading through posts on heartbreak, fear, and anxiety, as well as on relationships, daily niceties and personal triumphs, I could nestle in solidarity, and savor a tidbit of peace. Now, I'd like to express my gratitude by contributing.
I'm 23F, and I've struggled with non-normative eating since college. Escaping a youth dictated by my austerely strict father and terrorized by my physically and emotionally abusive mother, I went buckwild in all respects. The university cafeterias' buffet options, and my own gluttonous lack of discretion saw me hot air balloon to 130lbs by my third year. Imagine Emile from Ratatouille. I happily subsisted on trash foods (damn you, buffalo ranch chicken fries!), feasting greedily until I felt truly F.A.T. for the first time in my life.
Throughout this time, I joined and left a sorority, though I remained in that social group. This period of my life was intense and destructive-- the sorority participated in hazing, and the girls could be cruel and cliquey. I partied Thursday to Sunday, and abused prescription drugs like Vicodin, Ativan, Ritalin, Adderall, Xanax, as well as cocaine, MDMA, opium, shrooms, acid and DMT. I started smoking cigarettes, and Mary Jane was my best friend.
However, as with most things, there was a positive side to this newfound freedom and overwhelming independence. I alone influenced and made my own damn decisions, albeit some questionable; the act of choice validated me. I had electric intellectual connections with people better and more worldly than me, and learned so much in all my classes. My heart became braver. I felt thrillingly alive in my identity and little experiments. I tried out substances and people, and learned how best to pick and choose. I got turned down, but fell madly in love with a gorgeous man who loves me back. I lived oceanside, fell asleep and woke to sunlit sky over the sea. DMT, shrooms and tree awoke in me a sense of humanity, love, inner peace and goodwill, of which I didn't know I was so profoundly starved.
Yet accompanying these emotional extremes, and a burgeoning sense of self, I still felt empty. Every day I would see thin, beautiful students on campus, or nights out at a party, and I knew I wasn't doing enough. I discovered makeup, but that couldn't mask the disgust I felt with the "wings" flabbing on my arms, or my growing belly. I began heavily restricting, and voila-- the hideous weight dissolved, and I achieved my lowest weight of 103lbs. I felt drunk on the feeling of strength and accomplishment.
**TL;DR** Since uni, I've gained weight, but am working my way back to that nirvana. I've forgiven my mother. I'm trying to completely quit cigarettes, but still love a good stoner sesh. Though my lifestyle may not be orthodox or healthy, my philosophy is one of positivity and peace. I strive to love myself as I love the people in my life. Until then, practice makes perfect. Thanks for reading, friends!
[Other] Youtube series comparing/contrasting types of disordered eating: Supersize v. Superskinny.
/u/mermaid_puppy [5'4" | 137lb | UGW 115 | F]
Created: Thu Aug 11 15:47:48 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xai6v/youtube_series_comparingcontrasting_types_of/
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3hitRUroOf0
[Other] My problem is that I need to be thin, not that I'm hungry
/u/mermaid_puppy [5'4" | 137lb | UGW 115 | F]
Created: Thu Aug 11 15:42:42 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xahau/my_problem_is_that_i_need_to_be_thin_not_that_im/
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https://i.redd.it/7czeg5b0ptex.jpg
[Rant/Rave] So apparently this one supermarket stopped selling monster energy of all kinds..
/u/Sonnenblumenschein [5'3.5" | 91.5 lbs | 16.0 | -63.5 lbs]
Created: Thu Aug 11 15:13:10 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xac30/so_apparently_this_one_supermarket_stopped/
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So now I'm forced to cycle a kilometer further each way to get my favourite caffeine fix.
Yay for more cardio this lazy ass will actually do. 😂
[Rant/Rave] My boyfriend just got annoyed with me because I was eating a rice cake.
/u/throwaway03199519 [5'6 | CW 119.4 | GW 110| 19.35| -16.6 | F]
Created: Thu Aug 11 14:28:11 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xa4bt/my_boyfriend_just_got_annoyed_with_me_because_i/
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So today my boyfriend and I planned to cook a stir fry together but now plans have changed and we're going out to dinner. I planned to eat less than 200 cal and then have a good portion of stir fry for dinner. I ended up having a few spoonfuls of cottage cheese at around 2, which was 70-80 cal. Then my bf and I were talking and decided we could use a coupon to go out to dinner and even though I was anxious about going out I figured I could fit it in and stay under 1000 cal.
Because my stomach was growling so much and started to ache, I decided to have a 40 cal rice cake to calm it down before we have dinner. The first thing he says is "why are you eating! We're going out to dinner soon." And he seemed annoyed/angry. My first thought was "hmm you're right, why am I eating" and I blurted out "I didn't really eat yet today". Then he felt bad and I asked him to not ever ask me "why" I'm eating. I already feel guilty enough as it is. He knows I've been diagnosed with en ED, and knows I've been trying to eat more without feeling guilty. I've communicated that to him.
I just feel like sometimes he's rather insensitive (without trying to be) because he's often very unobservant and doesn't pick up on certain things easily. I'm trying to get into losing weight the healthy way but my ED is preventing that, and sometimes my bf and other people just make it worse -_-
[Discussion] ECA stacking - Adderall-like effect?
/u/throwaway-soph [5'5" | 103.6 | 17.44 | Depends | Female]
Created: Thu Aug 11 14:15:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xa23v/eca_stacking_adderalllike_effect/
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So, this isn't my first time ECA stacking - I stacked often a few months ago and have been doing on and off this past month. However, today when I took my stack, the effect has been much more extreme than normal. I feel like what I imagine taking Adderall feels like - I've got an extreme burst of energy and I just spent the last two hours organizing both my entire computer and my entire room. Normally, I just lose my appetite and feel a bit jittery, but today it's been like I took a much stronger stimulant, even though I didn't change my dose. Does this happen often for anyone else, or is it just a sometimes effect?
[Help] Help! I value your opinion, so what is my best option on this menu? Dinner with friends leads to anxiety
/u/mermaid_puppy [5'4" | 137lb | UGW 115 | F]
Created: Thu Aug 11 14:06:23 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4xa0ag/help_i_value_your_opinion_so_what_is_my_best/
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http://chaeokc.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/07/horizontalchaemenu-2.pdf
[Discussion] how long before you noticed a difference in your looks?
/u/trashmousey [5'5 | too fucking fat | -20 lbs | 19/F]
Created: Thu Aug 11 13:54:00 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x9y0m/how_long_before_you_noticed_a_difference_in_your/
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hi everyone. sorry for being annoying and posting so much but i'm just curious to hear everyone else's answers for this.
so i've lost 20 lbs so far (down from 174 to 154) and i still look EXACTLY the same. i've noticed literally no difference. i'm just wondering, for all of you, how much did you have to lose before you noticed yourself looking different?
[Help] Have been taking water pills -- now scared! Need some advice!
/u/wanderingrugrat [5'0" | cw: 96.8 lbs | -40 lbs | f]
Created: Thu Aug 11 13:49:13 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x9x64/have_been_taking_water_pills_now_scared_need_some/
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Hi guys-
Recently (in the past few weeks), I've been taking a water pill called Furosemide (aka Lasix). It's a loop dieruetic and pretty strong. My dad was prescribed it for general water retention - he rarely takes them. One day I was telling him how I felt bloated and he suggested I take one.
Basically, it makes me pee a lot and gets rid of a lot of water (and therefore sodium/other electrolytes with it). I only take it after I've binged or had a lot of salt to prevent water weight showing up on the scale and bloating. For example, I had a few slices of pizza yesterday and took one, and same story today.
I decided to google this pill and saw people talking about how it can deplete electrolytes, mess with your heart and kidneys, and lots of other dangerous side effects. I really wish I had never taken it. I've never noticed anything before besides that it dehydrates me and a little bit of an irregular heartbeat (likely this is anxiety though). I'm drinking water with electrolyte powder mixed in right now. I don't know what else to do. I feel so stupid for taking these so often.
Will I be okay? Could using these cause any kind of permanent damage? I'm not going to use it again after today :( I am only taking one pill, 20mg, so it is not a super crazy amount, but I am still really scared. I would really appreciate hearing your guys thoughts and experience with water pills if any.
[Goal] Should I adjust my ultimate goal weight? I was trying to be realistic, and since I've been on this sub the weight is falling off
/u/ClashTenniShoes [6'M | 212 lb| 28.8 BMI | -11 lb | UGW 190]
Created: Thu Aug 11 13:49:00 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x9x4l/should_i_adjust_my_ultimate_goal_weight_i_was/
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[removed]
[Help] Damn and bugger - any way to shed water weight/bloat in around 24hours?
/u/smokesanddietcokes [<3 ]
Created: Thu Aug 11 13:41:18 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x9vox/damn_and_bugger_any_way_to_shed_water_weightbloat/
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Yeah I know, one of those petty questions. I've never actually bothered trying to shed water weight/bloat quickly because as long as it wasn't 'real weight', I didn't really care much
But I just found out a thing is happening Saturday that I *really* would like to look nice as possible for in a little red dress and I've been binging all week and and and.. *screams*
I have gym tomorrow so I need to get some protein down me.. any way I can manage to lean out as much as possible by Saturday while still getting some protein? Fuuuuu---
[Other] Image Comparison: Examples of Celeb BMIs (19.0 - 17.2)
/u/realbutterflybaby [5'1" | CW: 105±1 GW: 88±1 | -26 lbs | F]
Created: Thu Aug 11 13:26:02 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x9sx8/image_comparison_examples_of_celeb_bmis_190_172/
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http://imgur.com/a/AbEW8
[Help] Calorie count: How many calories per single piece of bow-tie pasta (farfalle)?
/u/Noroeste [5'6 | can fit in a rowboat | F]
Created: Thu Aug 11 13:08:59 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x9pw9/calorie_count_how_many_calories_per_single_piece/
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I don't have the means to measure or weigh a serving to do the math so I'm hoping someone might know an estimate of the calories in each "bow-tie."
[Thinspo] Those abs. Thinspo from the Oklahoman newspaper
/u/mermaid_puppy [5'4" | 137lb | UGW 115 | F]
Created: Thu Aug 11 12:46:00 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x9llm/those_abs_thinspo_from_the_oklahoman_newspaper/
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http://i.imgur.com/NVDCM70.jpg
[Thinspo] Watching dirty dancing as binge prevention
/u/AmAlreadyGoingToHell
Created: Thu Aug 11 11:34:22 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x97s5/watching_dirty_dancing_as_binge_prevention/
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No guy will lift you if you stay this fat. C'mon. Drink your diet coke and stay here.
[Help] Freezing zucchini noodles?
/u/Nude-prude [5"6.5 | 105 lbls | 16.68|-40| female]
Created: Thu Aug 11 11:25:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x960r/freezing_zucchini_noodles/
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Bad idea? I find they wilt so fast.
[Tip] Perfect "binge food" PSA
/u/Hi_ilikerocks
Created: Thu Aug 11 11:18:51 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x94si/perfect_binge_food_psa/
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Sunflower seeds with the shells on them are my addiction right now. It takes me hours to eat a bag because you have to take the shells off and such, and I feel like I'm binging for hours but really it just takes a very very long time to consume them. A whole bag is only 160 cals :) so much better than me binging on chips and candy bars for 30 minutes.
[Help] Does anyone else experience this with the scales?
/u/smallsmallersmallest [168cm | CW 52.5kg GW 47kg | 18.66 | -8.5kg | F]
Created: Thu Aug 11 11:18:45 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x94rp/does_anyone_else_experience_this_with_the_scales/
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I weigh myself every morning after I've got up and been to the toilet but before I've eaten or drank anything, this is a consistent thing and I never change it. If I drink water before I have a chance to weigh myself I just won't do it that day. When I step on the scales they tell me a weight, so I step off and back on again and they tell me a different weight, usually a lower weight but once it was higher (but the first weight was close to my goal weight and I know I'm not there yet so I knew it wasn't telling the truth anyway). After this, every time I step on again, I get the second weight, no matter how many times I step on. At first I thought it was just my scales at home being dodgey, but it did the same when I used my boyfriend's scales at his house. So he stepped on twice and it told him the same weight both times. He suggested maybe it was the kilogramme setting that was causing it because he measured in stones and pounds when he tried it, so he stepped on with it measuring in kg and it showed a consistent weight both times. I've tried using both sets of scales in different areas of the room and it still happens to me. Does anyone have any clue why this happens? I tend to go with the second number over the first because that's the one that shows up multiple times but is that just me thinking that it's nicer to be the smaller number?
Tell me why I shouldn't eat these.
/u/thelonelykitten_
Created: Thu Aug 11 10:58:55 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x90u2/tell_me_why_i_shouldnt_eat_these/
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http://imgur.com/3XDuYDt
[Thinspo] Feeling thin today :)
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Aug 11 10:36:19 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x8wk2/feeling_thin_today/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/788365fea4244db0a7b6fa110cd061f7?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=180991001825a3901518cc758e086383
[Discussion] Finding Bronkaid/Primatene in CA
/u/1legallyblonde [5'10| GW 135 | -15 | F]
Created: Thu Aug 11 10:34:32 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x8w82/finding_bronkaidprimatene_in_ca/
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Hello All-
Moderately new to the thread and wanted to start by saying what a supportive group we have. Seriously! It's really nice to finally find people who just understand!
Anyways, my question is I have been having a hard time finding Bronkaid/Primatene in drug stores. Are any of you from California? I've checked CVS and Rite Aid with no luck.
I know I can buy online but I was hoping to stock up today.
Any help would be appreciated.
Thank you!
[Discussion] Birth control and weigh loss
/u/H2OandCaffeine [5ft7 | FAT | -15 lbs | F]
Created: Thu Aug 11 10:25:01 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x8ugk/birth_control_and_weigh_loss/
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Many of the birth control options have weight gain as one of the side effects to them. I was wondering how to have success losing weight while possibly going on birth control. What's worked for you? Have you just not gone on birth control?
[Thinspo] Am I thinspo?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Aug 11 10:14:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x8so5/am_i_thinspo/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/106b7e47f63d4e1880edc0895ce86227?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=11c4e08b9a141df5176c6d1eb320bb17
[Discussion] Daily Food Diary! August 11, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Thu Aug 11 10:02:32 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x8q9d/daily_food_diary_august_11_2016/
---
This is a daily food diary thread for August 11, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
[Discussion] "If I'm thin, then I'll be pretty."
/u/critical_fluff [5'2 | 110 | 21.10 | -2| F]
Created: Thu Aug 11 09:48:30 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x8np9/if_im_thin_then_ill_be_pretty/
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Hello lovelies,
I am not a beauty. Some people have called me pretty but I know it's an unconventional kind. My cheekbones are too high for how long my face is, permanent skin circles under my eyes.. things you can't change. But I think that what I can change is my weight. I think that when I get to 90 pounds, my cheekbones will be so defined without my puffy cheeks under them that it won't matter if they're wrong. When you're 90 pounds anything looks good because you're dainty and that makes you a pretty waif.
Does anyone else get this?
[Goal] Lost 2 pounds!
/u/monsterblink [5'6" | 144 | 23.6 | -36 | F]
Created: Thu Aug 11 09:21:18 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x8iqw/lost_2_pounds/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/fbf4e93622424936a3e2ad3b46b15d7d?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=d52260a06c36afd8cefa06aea75fa37f
[Other] My 37 calorie breakfast
/u/supersizetrainwreck [5'9 | CW 130.7lb | 18.95 | F]
Created: Thu Aug 11 08:24:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x88lq/my_37_calorie_breakfast/
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http://imgur.com/a/nGosz
[Thinspo] A few people have been asking me to do a gif, though I felt silly.. OP delivers !
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Aug 11 08:18:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x87eh/a_few_people_have_been_asking_me_to_do_a_gif/
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http://imgur.com/EJK3L5s
[Other] I don't know if anyone saw this, but it's pretty motivating/interesting!
/u/gombrick [167cm | 48.8kg | 17.6 | f]
Created: Thu Aug 11 07:56:36 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x83nj/i_dont_know_if_anyone_saw_this_but_its_pretty/
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http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/olympics/36984887?ocid=socialflow_facebook&ns_mchannel=social&ns_campaign=bbcnews&ns_source=facebook
[Discussion] Anyone else bipolar?
/u/123Purrr [5'8" | 123 | 18.5 | F/24]
Created: Thu Aug 11 07:32:42 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x7zry/anyone_else_bipolar/
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I'm emotionally exhausted from these cycles. I also can't help but feel as though my EDNOS feeds off of my bipolar energy.
Some times it feels like I'm either better than food or hate myself too much to feel comfortable consuming any terrifying calories. During this time I keep a protein shake or two on me in case I *forget* to eat that day and am under no social obligation to eat later.
Other times I feel like food is the only comfort/punishment I can have control over. When this happens I *"rediscover"* my love of cooking and end up binging every. single. day. Sometimes it feels like calories run my life and I'm just a helpless passenger stuffing her fat face.
I can honestly deal with my manic depression with enough sleep, weed, and meditation. The swings only last a few days at a time so it's really easy to cope with. EDNOS on the other hand is a sneaky nightmare. The restrict/binge swings can last anywhere from a few days to a few months. I'm currently on a binge swing and am getting really scared. I quit my SSRIs, coke habit, and drinking all cold turkey for my boyfriend. At this point in my life I have 0 control over my body. I'm scared the binge cycle will break 10 pounds too late and will fuel the restriction cycle with more punch then what I can handle/hide.
I'm just really terrified and want to hear about others' energies that swing around ending up okay.
[Discussion] Do you find restricting harder at a lower weight?
/u/woollyshirt [172cm | 54.7kg | 18.33 | -33.3kg | NB/M]
Created: Thu Aug 11 07:26:21 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x7yt9/do_you_find_restricting_harder_at_a_lower_weight/
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I'm not sure if it's just because I've been restricting with no break since January or because I'm a lower weight and therefore have less glycogen stores and whatnot but restricting seems so much harder now. Initially I could get by on 300-400 calories and now I struggle on 600, and despite having 1002 yesterday, today is going to be a maintenance day for me because I'm shaking and weak and I have work tomorrow and I'm 1kg from the goal I'm intending to maintain at but I feel horrible. I've deliberately been as sedentary as possible these past couple of days but I still just need to rest and I'm worried about being well enough to work when I can't find a less physical job at the moment.
Is restricting actually harder at a lower weight or is this just what 6 months of restricting and losing 32kg/70lbs in the process has done?
[Meme/Humor] when you try to reason with yourself before the binge
/u/ferrous_wwheel [5'9 | CW 145 lbs | GW 125 | woman]
Created: Thu Aug 11 07:24:14 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x7yft/when_you_try_to_reason_with_yourself_before_the/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/e7c9177dcb6d471a9bce99f4efd92403?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=9486cd884e882d96ab72a8034e105254
[Rant/Rave] Gag me gently with a chainsaw
/u/boredzoi [5'10| 135 | 19.35 | -15lbs | F]
Created: Thu Aug 11 07:20:18 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x7xpn/gag_me_gently_with_a_chainsaw/
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(( Do i look like a bulimic to you? ))
GOD IM SO PISSED. After 5 years of undiagnosed b/p hell, my body is finally breaking down and I can't stop it. I'm so disappointed in myself for letting it get to this.
My back molars are beginning to ache, and my throat feels so closed up and itchy- like a cold but more painful to swallow. Normally I'd pass it off as allergies or something harmless. But it's paired with this weird feeling in my ribs/esophagus that sounds a lot like GERD.
I don't want things to get worse for my body, but I don't know if I have it in me to stop the b/p cycle and work on restricting. I'm just an anxious mess rn really because I don't know whether I should see a doctor (and my dentist) about this to make sure it's not just a passing allergy....
Oh jeez guys I dunno how to help reverse what I've done, let alone do some damage control. I'm worried
[Help] Does anyone else deal with the wheezing, 'feel like I can't breathe' thing on fasts?
/u/ifuckpineapples [5'3" | 95.6 | 17.4 | -10lbs |F]
Created: Thu Aug 11 06:07:47 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x7nel/does_anyone_else_deal_with_the_wheezing_feel_like/
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Maybe this isn't just a problem specific to me, as I have had a few hyperventilation 'attacks' in the past. However sometimes after a day of fasting or super low restriction, I feel like breathing is harder? That my chest feels kinda tight and I inhaling is a lot of work, and I don't get much air out of it.
Tuesday I fasted. Wednesday (yesterday) I spent the day with a friend and ate 740cals. I felt fine, went to bed with my girlfriend. Then she had to wake me up two separate times during the night. She said I was wheezing/hardly breathing in my sleep, and she got scared. She also said she could hear my heart beating really fast, but I only half woke up each time and I don't remember it well.
I feel so, so shitty for scaring her like that. But I ate plenty that day, could I have been still exhausted from my fast the day before somehow? Does anyone have experience with this, or know maybe how to avoid it?
Disclaimer here that I know this probably sounds like one of those serious "you should go ask a doctor" posts. Im in the middle of finding a new doctor, but I'm hesitant to being it up anyhow for the obvious reasons and that it's hard to adequately explain. I just wanted to see if anyone else could give advice based on personal experience with this.
[Discussion] Weekly Emotional Support August 11, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Thu Aug 11 06:02:48 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x7mqe/weekly_emotional_support_august_11_2016/
---
We're almost all dealing with quite stressful things outside of our eating disorders. Whether it be complicated relationships, friends, university, work or other mental illnesses like depression, anxiety or OCD, we all seem to be having a rougher time emotionally and mentally than the general population.
Use this thread to post about your problems or ask for advice concerning things other than EDs/ED behaviors.
**As always, follow the sub rules when reading or posting.**
^Weekly ^emotional ^well-being ^and ^support ^threads ^are ^posted ^every ^Thursday.
^Have ^any ^questions ^or ^concerns? ^Comment ^below, ^or [^PM ^the ^mods.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FproED)
[Discussion] Have any of you been to a rehabilitation centre?
/u/Itsemurha [177cm | 71.9kg| 22.43| -47kg | GW: 60kg | F]
Created: Thu Aug 11 05:33:48 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x7jj3/have_any_of_you_been_to_a_rehabilitation_centre/
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My therapist keeps suggesting I consider going to one for a "few weeks" so i can learn how to eat in a controlled space since she thinks my bulimia isn't improving. Personally, i don't think I am that bad + too fat so idk. Have any of you been before? What happened? Did it do anything ?
[Rant/Rave] Getting high
/u/borrow_our_light
Created: Thu Aug 11 05:27:39 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x7iti/getting_high/
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I don't know if this is the right place to post this but last night I binged so hard. McDonald's skyline and Taco Bell. I hate myself, for the past few days I have been restricting and being good but 3 hits off a bong and all of my work down the drain. Any suggestions for getting back on track. Sorry no flair on mobile.
[Intro] Good morning! New member here.
/u/NeverPerfectEnough [5' 9.5" | 136 | 19.8 | F]
Created: Thu Aug 11 05:02:34 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x7g7x/good_morning_new_member_here/
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Hi, everyone. I figured I should introduce myself since I commented this morning. (No flair on mobile, sorry!) I've been reading this sub under my normal account for a while, and made a second account to keep my fiance from seeing my posts here. :/ I'm Ali, 31/F in the US. I've lived with disordered eating & bipolar disorder for most of my life. After a recent depressive episode, I put on a few pounds that I'm working off now. Kinda surprised I didn't gain more, tbh, because I always assume my BMR is quite low after years of off & on restricting. But anyway, hi!
[Help] How do deal with my office
/u/LessIsMoreeee [5'4'' | CW 113 | GW 105 | 19.78 | -23 | F]
Created: Thu Aug 11 04:55:21 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x7fhd/how_do_deal_with_my_office/
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Hey everyone :)
I need a little advice with the people in my office. First let me give you a little back story.
It's a big open office, during the semester I usually have classes to teach and am not in it as often. But some days and when we're not in a semester I sit in that office all day long.
90% of my coworkers are obese with another 5% being fat. The grand majority of people in my office are female but there are three guys, one chubby, one average, and one that is about 7' and super skinny.
Most of what everyone eats absolutely disgusts me. My boss is by far the largest (~400 lbs) and the other day her and her husband both got foot long subway sandwiches and ALL of the different flavors of chips to compare them.
Anyway, on to my problem. Although I refrain from saying a word about anyone else's eating habits, they all feel like my eating habits are fair game. Anytime I eat ANYTHING they all immediately start talking about it. My boss regularly tries to give me health advice and says my diet isn't healthy. It's gotten to the point that I don't eat much at the office because I can't stand their comments and them all talking to me about my oatmeal or fiber bar while I try to get work done.
Anyway. Today is my last day (thank god) and it coincides with a meeting we have from 9:30 am to 3:30 pm on changes for next semester. There will be food, tons of it. There will be sandwhiches, fried chocken, a freakish amount of baked goods and rivers of soda.
None of this even tempts me right now, I don't want it. I'm bringing a fruit platter and I'm starting my first day of an experiment I outlined in another thread so I will only be eating cantaloupe.
I know a lot of you have gone through stuff like this before, how do I handle the constant condescending talk about my plate? I've thought about throwing it back at them but I don't want to stoop to their level. I thought about making an announcement to everyone that we should keep the topic of other peoples' diets off the table but I don't want to draw more attention to it.
Any advice?
I love you guys <3
Tldr: obese office and morbidly obese office have a field day talking about what I eat. Today is a 6 hour long meeting full of food and I plan on eating only Cantaloupe.
[Rant/Rave] I have to fast now...
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Aug 11 03:54:04 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x79ia/i_have_to_fast_now/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] I just want to vent about some hypocrisy on this sub right now.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Thu Aug 11 03:23:38 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x76jh/i_just_want_to_vent_about_some_hypocrisy_on_this/
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[removed]
[Discussion] Have any of you with a BMI of under 18 ever binged (actual binge, not '2000 calories is a binge!' binge)? What about for more than just a day?
/u/smokesanddietcokes [<3 ]
Created: Thu Aug 11 02:47:28 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x7364/have_any_of_you_with_a_bmi_of_under_18_ever/
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Just wondering :( It seems to me that past a certain point, there's no room for slip ups at all.. you have to be *super* perfect when your TDEE gets low, to still lose weight.
Are you just super perfect and never slip up? :( I'M GUESSING YES <3
[Help] How to get over short stubby legs?
/u/torchythetorchic
Created: Thu Aug 11 01:40:15 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x6wdr/how_to_get_over_short_stubby_legs/
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So I'm 5'0 and have quite short legs, all the thinspo I see is of girls with legs for days and it just makes me hate myself even more (which leads to binging and SH).
Does anyone else have this problem and if so, how have you got over it and accepted your short legs so you can focus on your goal?
[Discussion] Anyone else "bad" at having an ED?
/u/pretentiousintrovert [5'6 | 159# | FML | -12#]
Created: Thu Aug 11 00:52:13 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x6r9b/anyone_else_bad_at_having_an_ed/
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I've been unhappy with my body going on binge/restricting cycles for YEARS now, but that actually resulted in weight GAIN most of the time. Anyone else here who feels like they're just getting cheated out of all the mental energy they spend hating food and their body? I guess I'm feeling discouraged by how many of you I see with stats going down and posting progress pics while I'm just on this horrible hamster wheel :(
[Thinspo] chest bones feelin sorta good
/u/texas_native [5'6" | 118 | 19.05 | F]
Created: Thu Aug 11 00:12:41 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x6mzj/chest_bones_feelin_sorta_good/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/bb8d097ef17b4fac88f3b7e1b4cdda31?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=9737c02da427a2e6561227aeae7c5c4a
[Help] How do I stop binge eating while drinking?
/u/59poisonandwine
Created: Thu Aug 11 00:12:02 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x6mx6/how_do_i_stop_binge_eating_while_drinking/
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Is not drinking the only solution? Cause fuck that I enjoy a good drink or three or seven on my day off. But every time no matter how much i ate or didn't eat before, I end up eating the whole damn kitchen. Then I argue with myself about if I should purge because purging generally makes me feel more sober which I don't want but not purging will make me gain. Ugh is there a specific drink y'all can recommend that reduces the urge to binge? I usually drink cheap wine or Sprite Zero/vodka/Mio.
[Other] Living in the south during the summer
/u/H2OandCaffeine [5ft7 | FAT | -15 lbs | F]
Created: Wed Aug 10 23:50:19 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x6kd4/living_in_the_south_during_the_summer/
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Its amazing because I always am cold while intermittent fasting and restricting. Just gotta stay hydrated ;)
[Rant/Rave] 22 days.
/u/AbandonEarth
Created: Wed Aug 10 22:27:53 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x69xv/22_days/
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I was binge/purge free 22 days until tonight. I thought I was stronger and could just restrict; but after eating, the idea of gaining weight was so much more frightning than any consequence of purging. When stuffing my face I didn’t even enjoy the food. Disgusting. I devoured everything so quickly that I don’t even remember the taste and all I was left with was that bloated sick feeling. Anyway, fast food is greasy foul garbage that sucks going down and coming back up.
Even though I'm feeling like a failure rn, all thing considered I can still start over and restrict tomorrow right?
[Goal] I love it when MFP gives me this warning. Exercise plus lots of activity on 712 total intake.
/u/30sumfinproA
Created: Wed Aug 10 21:57:20 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x65zp/i_love_it_when_mfp_gives_me_this_warning_exercise/
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http://i.imgur.com/R8Daji9.png
[Discussion] [Discussion] Question for all you male proED people...
/u/beautyandbeast5 [5'2 | 123.5lb | 22.6 | 42lb | F]
Created: Wed Aug 10 21:38:37 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x63hv/discussion_question_for_all_you_male_proed_people/
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So assuming you reach your goal of underweight, I was wondering what happens to your junk. Does it get thinner? Does it stay the same? Does it behave differently? I'd really, really like to know...
[Discussion] Interesting mono experiment
/u/LessIsMoreeee [5'4'' | CW 113 | GW 105 | 19.78 | -23 | F]
Created: Wed Aug 10 21:23:11 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x61f7/interesting_mono_experiment/
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A lot of the time I treat my ed more like a science experiment to see what I am capable of or to see what happens if I do x.
There's been a lot of talk about mono dieting on this sub lately and while I think the part where 'your body rejects calories if you eat too much of one thing' is bullshit, I still find monos interesting.
To me a mono would be more about not having to plan what I eat all day and focusing on other things. I also think it could be a tool to make me want to eat less.
So here's my plan, I still want to get a good nutritional balance so it's a 5 day plan of meeting different macros. I would still take my vitamins everyday.
Thursday: Cantaloupe
Friday: chicken
Saturday: brocolli
Sunday: eggs
Monday: sweet potato
These are all foods that I like and meet certain nutritional requirements. I still plan on trying to keep calories to less than 900 a day but I feel like it's less of a big deal of I go over on protein days and under on carb days.
Anyway, thoughts? Comments?
How are you guys doing? :)
[Help] Body changing overnight? (Not body dysmorphia)
/u/prudencethecat
Created: Wed Aug 10 20:23:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x5tcz/body_changing_overnight_not_body_dysmorphia/
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Okay so I've been maintaining my weight for a while now. (Well, I keep losing and gaining the same 5 pounds.)
And I'm 10 pounds away from my ultimate goal weight.
My legs have been the part of my body I'm most self conscious of because it's the last place I lose fat from . And my legs are the textbook definition of skinny fat. Despite working out a lot in the past, they're so jiggly . I attribute this to having a high body fat percentage so I stopped working out to lose fat and not build any more muscle on my legs. As they build muscle quite fast.
Okay so the other day I went kayaking for the first time. I don't know if this is normal or I was doing something wrong but I was getting a leg workout despite not moving my legs at all. I have really short legs and for some reason I had to kind of , whatchamacallit , like tense my legs to have good balance . Even though I was using my arms for kayaking , my legs had to be strong the entire time to keep me balanced. So the next day my legs were hella sore. But the strange thing is that it has now been two days and my legs are really strong. Before I could pinch the fat in my legs and now the skin is barely pinch-able. Is it possible my legs are retaining water? I just don't understand. I mean my entire leg is almost nothing but muscle. I'm kind of scared. Has anyone else experienced this? Thoughts please.
[Rant/Rave] I'm going to be like you lovelies sooner than I know it, I know.
/u/tinyme23 [5'3" | 146 | 25.9 | -25 lbs | F]
Created: Wed Aug 10 20:15:36 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x5s4s/im_going_to_be_like_you_lovelies_sooner_than_i/
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Hey guys!
So I fasted a lot this week. My net cals for the entire week added up to 1815. I'm so proud of myself omg. I'd say how much I've lost (it's a ton) but the whole process is more about control for me at this point.
Honestly I am still roughly elephant-sized but I have started to remember how lovely fasting feels, feeling like floating in air, when everything is black and white and there are no decisions.
[Help] First post and conflicted about seeking help
/u/explodingrhinoceros [5'6.5" | CW: 170.4 | BMI: 27.1 | SW: 218.2 lbs | GW: 125 lbs | F]
Created: Wed Aug 10 19:33:39 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x5lye/first_post_and_conflicted_about_seeking_help/
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Hey everyone. I've been lurking for a little bit here, and everyone just seems so nice and supportive. I hope I'm welcome to post here too.
The short of it is that I started losing weight healthily the beginning of this year, and that was all fine and good. However, over the past few months it's become considerably more unhealthy and restrictive. I consume anywhere from 500-1000 calories per day, and no more than 2 meals per day typically. I've also begun to try purging methods like exercise and laxative use if I feel like I've eaten too much or bad foods. I'm a singer so the other method would be awful for my vocal chords.
Anyway, I've mentioned this to my therapist and she's concerned as this is "out of character" for me. However, after last night, I don't know if I want to get better.
Basically, a guy I like(d) had me over and there was a plate of food waiting for me. It was dark out so I just kinda cut it up and pushed it around the plate. I really didn't want to eat in front of him. Things were fine until he said something like "and you didn't eat anything I made." I was humiliated. Later that night he looked at me in the light and commented on how much weight I've lost and kept asking what I've been doing. That was when I lost it. I broke down and admitted that I have a problem with food and that's why I've lost weight. It was a pretty horrible night. He also basically told me that we can't be together like relationship-wise, but that he thinks I'm a "good person" and wants to keep a friendship. I mean... I'm an absolute hot mess right now, but that stings.
Everything else in my life is spiraling out of control so fast, that restricting my food intake is the only thing I have control over. I can't control his thoughts on relationships, or if employers want to hire me, etc... but I don't have to put that piece of candy in my mouth. I don't want to give it up right now.
Thanks for reading.
[Thinspo] I don't think I'm male thinspo yet but I felt relatively thin today :)
/u/CharChar12 [5' 9.5 |140lbs|21| Male]
Created: Wed Aug 10 19:00:22 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x5gut/i_dont_think_im_male_thinspo_yet_but_i_felt/
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http://imgur.com/IMYLUby
[Rant/Rave] Guilt
/u/ratpoisonfurdinner
Created: Wed Aug 10 18:36:04 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x5d59/guilt/
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My boyfriend bought a bunch of delicious sandwich stuff for his lunches at work. Meats, cheeses, bread.. even made garlic aoili his own damn self.
Guess who has two thumbs and couldn't control herself? This guy. Binge purge binge purge.
He knows about my history with food, and we just started living together one on one. I've never really had to deal with this. I always usually had someone to blame it on if I lost control and food was missing. Yes, I know I'm horrible. I should buy him some more things to make up for it.. things I don't like and he does hah.
Anyway, I used to have an older account on here but I remade because aforementioned love of my life found that one, and idk if he's still reading it. So hi!! How are you all doing? Hopefully better than me.
[Other] Something my friend said to me at work today...
/u/thelonelykitten_
Created: Wed Aug 10 18:10:19 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x59dm/something_my_friend_said_to_me_at_work_today/
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Today I was talking to a friend at work over a beer(regretting that now, my stomach is killing me). I was talking about what I wanted for dinner and mentioned that I had some ground pork in the fridge and was trying to figure out a meal and he asked what else I had. I listed off what I have in my kitchen and he stops me and goes "oh wait I forgot- you're thin and don't eat." I was shocked that someone thought I was thin. He said he never sees me eat lunch. Idk it kind of made me happy??
[Rant/Rave] So I just chewed and spit for the first time
/u/PBhatesme [5'4"| 144 | 24.7 | -52| F]
Created: Wed Aug 10 17:56:22 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x5755/so_i_just_chewed_and_spit_for_the_first_time/
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I totally didn't mean to. I didn't even realize I was doing it until I was well into it.
I've been away for a bit. I've been lurking and reading, but haven't really been posting as I've been in a binge cycle for about a fucking month. (And when I'm binging I'm way too ashamed to post here. But you guys totally shouldn't be. I'm just a weird anxious loser freak).
The last week or so I'm finally back in a restricting/fasting cycle. Then tonight, I made husband chicken cutlets for dinner. As I was cleaning up, I grabbed one of the leftovers to munch on while I cleaned up. I bit into a piece of fat and spit it into the trash. Took another bite and although it wasn't full of fat, spit that one too. All of a sudden I chewed and spit, like, 3 pieces of fried chicken! I don't even know how it happened.
My garbage looks pretty gross, but my stomach still feels empty.
I honestly can't decide if I'm happy or sad about this. Sigh.
[Goal] Fasting goal, weight goal, AND a BMI goal!
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Aug 10 17:36:20 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x53zr/fasting_goal_weight_goal_and_a_bmi_goal/
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[deleted]
[Discussion] For the love of tea...
/u/_-TAWat-_ [5'3" | 31F | UGW 110.2#]
Created: Wed Aug 10 17:09:22 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x4zvi/for_the_love_of_tea/
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Alright y'all... I **LOVE** tea. It's low/no cal and great at any time of the day, depending on caffeine level. I got a shipment of new savory teas delivered today, and I've already had two cups for lunch (15 cals each), about to go make some "dinner".
Anyone else out there love tea? What do you have in your tea arsenal right now?
[Rant/Rave] A bit of jealously at the local grocery...
/u/cheeekyslug [5'6" | UGW: 90 | -60 lbs since 6/20/16 | 19/F]
Created: Wed Aug 10 16:55:25 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x4xn4/a_bit_of_jealously_at_the_local_grocery/
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Meant to say "jealousy" lol
Just to cut to the chase, but every time I go to the grocery store that everyone in my college town goes to, I alway usually see couples. But there is the one girl who I'm a bit jealous of not because she's thin, but actually the opposite.
There's some really cute surfer couples, just getting dinner and all, while I'm just carrying a basket of Diet cola and coffee. There's this girl I know that lives in another building, and she told me she went on a "no-carb diet" for the summer. lol bullshit. I saw her cart filled with burger buns, chips, smores stuff, etc. But what I did notice was that she had a boyfriend, and he was pretty fit and good looking. This girl is literally twice as big as me (and that's says a lot), yet she's with this guy and they're holding hands and cracking jokes and getting dinner.
I'm not mentally ready to date again due to my incident on campus, but I always fantasized about having a boyfriend when I get to my GW. I was literally so jealous of her. She doesn't have to worry about food or watching her waist or counting calories. Someone loves her, even *cares* about her, while I'm over here feeling guilty because I overate some kale and kale has carbs and crying because I'm having a case of Stockholm Syndrome with the cute boy who stalked me, forced me to go on a date with him, and then sexually assaulted me.
I just feel like it's not fair. And I just keep seeing the same type of couples all of the time -- a good looking, sweet guy with a morbidly obese girl.
I know have a pretty friendly personality and I feel like I'm not the worst person out there, but it just seems like my perception of perfection is convoluted nowadays. I honestly don't think she's done anything wrong. I am guilty of being jealous, but I always assumed that being at a skinny weight and healthy mindset is optimal while distinctive features like a nice smile, big boobs or butt, pretty hair were just bonuses. I know a lot of my straight guy friends tell me all the time that they would want a skinny girl with all the right assets and pretty hair, but I have yet to hear "I just want a morbidly obese girl". It just seems like it's all out my control. Guess I'll just be single forever lol
[Rant/Rave] First time congee!!! So good. 80c for congee and 250 for chicken.
/u/LessIsMoreeee [5'4'' | CW 113 | GW 105 | 19.78 | -23 | F]
Created: Wed Aug 10 16:17:34 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x4re1/first_time_congee_so_good_80c_for_congee_and_250/
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https://imgur.com/0RcPHLc
[Goal] Halo top mono in Sydney
/u/beautyandbeast5 [5'2 | 123.5lb | 22.6 | 42lb | F]
Created: Wed Aug 10 16:16:48 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x4r9l/halo_top_mono_in_sydney/
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U/tryingtocutback mentioned halo top and it got me researching. Turns out we DO have it in Sydney as of this year, so I'm going to be jumping from my chocolate mono to a halo top mono. Shall keep you posted... :D
Edit: on mobile so cannot flair, if I could it would be "goals".
[Goal] After losing and maintaining, I think I'm allowed to call it a thigh gap now.
/u/gingerbiscuity [5'5 | 116 | 19.27 | 24 | F/25 ]
Created: Wed Aug 10 15:33:47 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x4jsf/after_losing_and_maintaining_i_think_im_allowed/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/85341bf3a78b4b97966e5e4b25e95fd7?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=3f38f5ec8a73f52b1f28b47d649a1890
[Discussion] Anyone else doing their ED without caffeine?
/u/ooo5936 [5'6" | 124.2lbs | GW: 115 | -8.6lbs | F]
Created: Wed Aug 10 15:24:11 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x4i3w/anyone_else_doing_their_ed_without_caffeine/
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I don't drink caffeine because of my acne - AND I FREAKING LOVE COFFEE - but I was curious if anyone else doesn't do caffeine and how they get energy to make it through the day?
[Other] My drink haul after being called an anorexic
/u/sewnp [168cm | GW:90lbs | NB]
Created: Wed Aug 10 15:20:27 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x4hgt/my_drink_haul_after_being_called_an_anorexic/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/9be511f692a9438d8714d1a69dd21759?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=96c0185554dc09adb6e19f98790a98e7
[Discussion] Lifting, restricting, and getting lean
/u/notyourtoy [5'7.5" | 124 lbs | 19 BMI | -39 lbs | F]
Created: Wed Aug 10 15:05:00 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x4esv/lifting_restricting_and_getting_lean/
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I know some of you lift and I'm looking for advice and discussion. Finally, after 6 months off, I'm getting back in the gym to lift some heavy weight. I want to lose fat, build muscle, and ultimately still lose about 5-7 more pounds. The goal is a tight, lean, strong body.
To that end, I'm creating a meal plan. I really can't eat more than 1000 calories a day, it scares me too much. But I've worked out a way to get 60 grams of protein a day on 900 calories.
What do you guys eat? How much do you eat on lifting vs non lifting days? Do you have meal plans you like?
[Thinspo] Pajama thinspo: like fashion thinspo, but for people who don't want to get out of bed
/u/println-Hello_World [5'4 | 115.7 | 20.25 | 21.3 | F]
Created: Wed Aug 10 14:27:04 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x47wi/pajama_thinspo_like_fashion_thinspo_but_for/
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http://imgur.com/a/vDi80
[Rant/Rave] Officially can't talk about weight loss at work anymore
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Aug 10 13:52:32 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x41gn/officially_cant_talk_about_weight_loss_at_work/
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[deleted]
[Other] Motivation after a bad day
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Aug 10 13:26:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x3wt4/motivation_after_a_bad_day/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] New low (not the good kind)
/u/athorwaway [5'4"| 145 | F]
Created: Wed Aug 10 13:25:28 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x3wkd/new_low_not_the_good_kind/
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Warning: Rant incoming.
This morning I tied my fridge shut using plastic bags so that I would stop binging (or eating at all, I guess). So far, it's working, but this is a new level of crazy for me.
I started going to a new therapist a few weeks ago. I told her I wanted to stop being so distressed about food and body image. She told me that she can help me "land the plane" whatever that means. After bringing it up, I instantly regretted it. I should have waited until I was at a weight that I'm comfortable with before bringing it up. I don't want to land a plane at this weight.
Hence, stress stress stress!
I don't think of myself as eating disordered. But, I have been going further and further along that path and would really like to end it before it gets worse. I know that this forum is "pro" ED, but it still feels like the only place to share these things.
[Meme/Humor] On a really bad binge though
/u/goddamnroommate [5'6" | 143.1 | 23.17 | -50ish | F]
Created: Wed Aug 10 13:17:55 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x3v4y/on_a_really_bad_binge_though/
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http://i.imgur.com/ID93kmQ.jpg
[Discussion] Rituals surrounding food
/u/damn_it_linda
Created: Wed Aug 10 12:28:22 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x3lmy/rituals_surrounding_food/
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Hey everyone!
Long story short, I was just called out by some (incredibly rude and out of line, albeit not incorrect) woman at work, due to my food "ritual". I'm always facinated to hear about evereyone elses food rituals, and often feel a little less alone about it knowing that others do it, too. I'm currently eating a green pepper cut up into approximately 40 pieces, drowned in yellow mustard. I'm sipping black coffee and water from a gallon jug. So, cutting food super small, excessive low calorie condiments, taking a staggeringly long time to eat...filling up on water and fiber supplements ... Those seem to be the primary ones.
What's your food ritual?
[Rant/Rave] CHEST BONES! ♡
/u/mckenziemudkip [5'3 | CW:115(-15) GW:88 | BMI 20.93| F/20]
Created: Wed Aug 10 12:16:37 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x3jfp/chest_bones/
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So, I told you guys I had a vacation to California coming up, and that's where I currently am! :D
So, the last week or so I've been PMSing and my appetite is ravenous. I think I've been averaging 800 cal days instead of the targeted 400 cal.
So, I thought that was a bummer. BUT I still have lost a little, and I think real weight for the first time this month? Because I have chest bones, guys. Fucking chest bones ♡ the one thing I've been waiting for. They aren't SUPER prominent, but my sternum between my boobs is showing. I can see where it connects to my ribs, and I'm just so excited. My boyfriend even said "wow, I can definitley see the bones in your chest" concerned, of course, but it made me even happier! What a weirdo, right?
So while I'm here, I'm trying to just make good choices food wise to either maintain until I get home, or, maybe if I'm lucky, lose a little more.
I hope you all are having a great week! Happy hump day! c:
[Discussion] Would you rather....
/u/FaithHopeTrick [5'7 | CW 124 GW 119 |19.35 | -31lbs | F]
Created: Wed Aug 10 11:52:36 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x3ewk/would_you_rather/
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Be able to change anything about your appearance at will (have a pixie cut one day then hair long enough to sit on the next, different coloured eyes and skin, painless disappearance or appearance of tattoos, better nose, bigger boobs etc) but have your BMI remain the same unless you actively work at changing it
Or
Just have the power to control your weight at will (hello stuffed crust pizza that I can eat while maintaining 109lbs) but none of the other stuff?
As amazing as binge eating and losing weight would be I know I have the power to get to my UGW anyway. I would kill for long thick hair and green eyes and clear skin though... So I don't know what i would do.
[discussion/mobile]
[Rant/Rave] Everything in my life feels so disorganized and out of my control. The only thing I am finding comfort in is my ED.
/u/finch_love [5'6" | 167.4 | 27.02 | -52.6 | F]
Created: Wed Aug 10 11:52:22 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x3euw/everything_in_my_life_feels_so_disorganized_and/
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It's like I'm in space with no gravity and everything in my life I'm supposed to focusing on is floating around and drifting away from me but I'm desperately grasping at all of it, trying to bring it all back and have control over it.
The only thing in my life that is bringing me any sense of peace is my ED. I *can* control what I eat and how much activity I do, so that's what I'm doing. I bought a stack of these [disposable cups with lids](http://www.annysplastictableware.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/06/12oz-1-3.jpg) and made a huge batch of protein smoothies on Sunday then portioned it out and froze all of them for breakfasts. I also bought [these little 2 oz. cups](http://www.annysplastictableware.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/06/%E6%9C%AA%E6%A0%87%E9%A2%98-45.jpg) and portioned out my salad dressing and coffee creamer for the week. Costco makes [their own version of Quest bars](http://images.costco-static.com/image/media/350-1076882-847__1.jpg) so I bought a box of those. Quest bars taste better IMO and are less chewy but for the price I'll take a box of these.
It's so nice to have one less thing to stress about right now.
[Help] So confused at this soup. 1/2 cup in concentrated form? Or using cooking directions ?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Aug 10 11:22:28 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x394p/so_confused_at_this_soup_12_cup_in_concentrated/
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http://imgur.com/saByj69
[Tip] Your Under 100-Calorie Serving Size Guide for 50 Healthy Foods - Woman's Day
/u/supersizetrainwreck [5'9 | CW 130.7lb | 18.95 | F]
Created: Wed Aug 10 10:45:51 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x32ke/your_under_100calorie_serving_size_guide_for_50/
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http://www.womansday.com/health-fitness/nutrition/g163/50-foods-under-100-calories/
[Help] Recovery in Glasgow
/u/cpdfhdo
Created: Wed Aug 10 10:28:00 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x2zcs/recovery_in_glasgow/
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I'm looking for some help and support in the Glasgow area. I plan on approaching my GP soon but was looking for community support first. My main issue is with purging. I found [these guys](http://www.gerberaeatingdisorderservices.com/support-groups.html) and was wondering if anyone knows anything about this group? thanks for reading. Sorry if this isn't appropriate for the sub.
[Discussion] Reddit gifts condiment exchange! What do I request?
/u/tryingtocutback
Created: Wed Aug 10 10:12:55 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x2wj8/reddit_gifts_condiment_exchange_what_do_i_request/
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What are your favorite low-cal companies? What do you love/hate from Walden Farms?
[Rant/Rave] Don't call someone you barely know anorexic!!!!!
/u/sewnp [168cm | GW:90lbs | NB]
Created: Wed Aug 10 10:12:18 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x2wer/dont_call_someone_you_barely_know_anorexic/
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So at work yesterday, two of my coworkers were about to go inside the gas station to get food and what nots.
I declined because I didn't bring any money with me. So my very thin and 125lbs 5'7" coworker said, 'God you're so anorexic!' And I just kinda sat there for a second, processing. Then after it actually hit me that this asshole fucker has no filter, I calmly told her that it 'wasn't nice to say that' and she muttered 'yeah it isn't nice' like three-four fucking times before leaving with my other coworker. ????? What the fuck did I do to you. She's the type of person who goes to work to socialize and hates actually workings. I may have quipped at her to stop fucking around a few times but does that warrant just a fucking rude remark to me about something YOU KNOW NOTHING ABOUT. Fuck you.
edit: on mobile and don't think I can flair properly...
[Discussion] Daily Food Diary! August 10, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Wed Aug 10 10:02:45 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x2ujg/daily_food_diary_august_10_2016/
---
This is a daily food diary thread for August 10, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
[Discussion] What are some of your favorite quotes?
/u/YourChinaDoll [5'1" | SW: 169 | CW: 130.4 | F]
Created: Wed Aug 10 09:19:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x2ml7/what_are_some_of_your_favorite_quotes/
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They don't have to be ed related, although usually I find some ed meaning in most quotes anyway. I just realized that my favorite quote doesn't hold true for me anymore. What are some of your favorites?
[Help] Help! How many calories are in my Vitamins?
/u/supersizetrainwreck [5'9 | CW 130.7lb | 18.95 | F]
Created: Wed Aug 10 08:39:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x2frm/help_how_many_calories_are_in_my_vitamins/
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So I just got back from CVS picking up some much needed caffeine and while I was there I decided to pick up some vitamins because I've been feeling really weak lately. I try to go for whole, clean foods as best I can so when I found Nature's Way Alive! Women's Gummy Vitamins I grabbed a 60 count bottle. Once I got back to the office I looked it up online and on their website they only have the Premium Formula Gummies in 75 count. Normally I wouldn't think much of it but they have the calories listed at 25 calories for 3 gummies which is the serving of Premium, while the ones that I have only recommend taking 2 per day. Am I assuming that 2 gummies is 17 calories or that they're different because they're different formulas. I can't find calorie information on the ones I bought anywhere online. HELP?!
[Help] Binged Protein Bars, Stomach Problems...
/u/realbutterflybaby [5'1" | CW: 105±1 GW: 88±1 | -26 lbs | F]
Created: Wed Aug 10 08:36:07 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x2f3m/binged_protein_bars_stomach_problems/
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At first I thought I was allergic to inulin but then today I told my doctor about it and she immediately was like, "oh you must have gotten a stomach ache!" before I could even finish. Why would eating a lot of protein bars (Luna Protein Bar) give me stomahh problems? Does this mean I likely didn't digest all those calories?
[Rant/Rave] When they think they know better
/u/boredzoi [5'10| 135 | 19.35 | -15lbs | F]
Created: Wed Aug 10 07:24:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x23er/when_they_think_they_know_better/
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I was getting drunk with my bffs last night and we stumbled on the topic of calories in liquors. (I drank ~800Kcal Oh god) and one of them kept fucking Insisting that all clear liquors had little to no calories and the calories in everclear can't be absorbed by the body at all! (WTF) and then we got on yhe subject of Mono diets and what the "ideal meal plan" is for humans and??? I just Shut him down bc trust me honey when ur gonna talk food the disordered girl will *ALWAYS know more than you*.
Needless to say I think I gave away too much info bc now he wants to know how I know so much about nutrition.... yikes
He is pretty obtuse tho so I don't think he'll figure it out on his own..
[Other] stopped a binge.. ew
/u/Edible_pain [5 foot 6 in| 140 | -over 100lbs| F]
Created: Wed Aug 10 06:38:17 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x1wqd/stopped_a_binge_ew/
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so, i was about to binge of icecream.. but i came across this fucked up video.. and i am too grossed out to ever eat again. the video is a woman with an infected back tattoo that is being drained by a doctor. its really really gross.. and thats coming from someone who works with dead bodies.
ew
http://www.mandatory.com/2016/02/18/womans-infected-tattoo-spits-out-a-crazy-amount-of-pus-and-bloo/
[Other] Planning on donating blood this evening, so I obviously had to check....
/u/skinnypod [5'6" | 121 | 19.8 | F]
Created: Wed Aug 10 06:03:26 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x1s90/planning_on_donating_blood_this_evening_so_i/
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http://imgur.com/IwXWztf
[Discussion] Way To Go Wednesday August 10, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Wed Aug 10 06:03:05 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x1s74/way_to_go_wednesday_august_10_2016/
---
This is the weekly achievement thread for August 10, 2016.
This weekly thread is to spotlight those achievements you feel don't necessarily warrant their own post, but you'd like to celebrate all the same. This is not limited to specifically ED-related goals; share anything you are happy about having done or accomplished recently!
^Achievement ^threads ^are ^posted ^every ^Wednesday.
^Have ^any ^questions ^or ^concerns? ^Comment ^below, ^or [^PM ^the ^mods.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FproED)
[Rant/Rave] Got told off for being upset about my weight gain...
/u/smokesanddietcokes [<3 ]
Created: Wed Aug 10 05:32:13 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x1ok4/got_told_off_for_being_upset_about_my_weight_gain/
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So as I've posted, I've binged the past four days. I think it's over now.
I gained around 2.5kgs. 44.3kgs last time I weighed, today I was at 46.7kgs (I wasnt gonna weigh again until the end of August, but consider the binge this was a special circumstance!).
I pretty casually mention it to a friend and that I am not that happy about it.. and she goes on a rant about how I shouldn't be upset about gaining weight because 'there is nothing wrong with gaining weight' and 'nothing wrong with being fat'. For the record, yes she's overweight.
Like, fuck off? Okay fine, my binge gain didn't make me obese, but surely ANYONE - completely disregarding my ED brain and whatever - would and more importantly SHOULD feel bad if they have gained weight as the result of eating a dozen thousand of calories PLUS of utter SHITE for four days? THAT IS NOT A GOOD THING! THAT IS NOT GOOD BEHAVIOUR, FOR ANYONE.
And no. There is nothing wrong as in morally bad about being fat. I agree. I was fat once. I wasn't like a murderer or a criminal, just a poor fat girl with no self control. BUT ITS UNHEALTHY TO BE FAT. Not morally bad, but it IS unhealthy and there IS something wrong with it for that.
But I get told off and treated like I am some kind of villain for treating my weight gain as a negative thing. Well sorry, it fucking is.
If anyone who is currently fat or obese is reading this, I seriously have ZERO problem with you and your body <3 I swear. I've said it once and I'll say it again.. we're no different. We're here, and no different. But I am fed up of these acceptance-y people is all. You can't talk bluntly and freely and FACTUALLY about fat and weight without hurting someones feelings and being treated as if you're an awful person for it.
Eurgh. But, in a way, the exchange made me feel better. I may be further from my goal than ever. I may right now weigh more than I ever wanted to weigh again (I never wanted to be above 100lbs again - hoping at least 1kg is water weight!).. but at least I *give a damn*. At least I'm going to fix this. At least I'm not just going to let myself pile it on and pretend it's okay. At least I'm no longer sitting letting myself be fat. I might not be the weight I am through the healthiest means but.. I feel sure, very sure, I am healthier than when I was 230lbs even getting here like I have done. Yeah. I might be a fatass right now, but at least I FUCKING CARE and am not fooling myself or lying to myself.
PFT.
[Rant/Rave] Intro / ramble-rant
/u/VenusUnicorn
Created: Wed Aug 10 04:18:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x1grx/intro_ramblerant/
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Hi all. I have been looking at this sub daily for a few weeks. This community seems non-judgemental so I decided to make an account to post here, but I'm a little bit nervous about being so personal even if it's anonymous.
For all of my life I've been overweight. Always the biggest one in the group. I had a rough childhood and was horribly depressed, and tried to kill myself when I was 13. I was put on medication and I gained 100 pounds, literally. So I was officially morbidly obese. I was so happy back then. I was in therapy and things were going good. I knew I was big but I was so blissfully unaware at exactly how big I was. But I had a lot of friends, and people actually liked me. I was the funny fat friend.
I went on vacation out of the country when I was 16. I don't know what triggered it, but on that trip I out-of-the-blue became painfully self aware. That's when I started heavily restricting. I was there for three weeks and I lost 20 pounds. I was still obese, but I was feeling so good about myself.
I got down to the middle of the healthy weight range by restricting on and off. It was so easy for me, I was losing weight quickly and I wasn't even hungry anymore. But in March of this year it seemed like all of a sudden I was STARVING - all of the time. In that month alone I gained 15 pounds, putting me just right over the border into the overweight category, and I've been shamefully maintaining that since then.
I've tried restricting again, but I couldn't make it longer than a few days without disgustingly stuffing my face and undoing my already minimal progress. I already drink a lot of water to suppress my appetite but it doesn't work for me. Neither does coffee or tea. I started the ketogenic diet in May. I was drawn to this diet because they say that fat = satiation (my main problem) but it's not working either. I feel better without all of the carbs but I've only lost 5 pounds of water weight and I'M ALWAYS HUNGRY and can't stop eating.
I am so ashamed of myself. Because of how much I hate how I look, I avoid being in public and I've ruined my relationships with friends and family so they don't look at me because I hate being looked at. I've isolated myself so badly that now I have horrible social anxiety and can't speak to someone other than my mom for longer than a few seconds. I can't look in the mirror because my reflection brings me to tears. I don't know what to do. My life has spiraled out of control and I feel like there's no point to anything anymore. I hate being like this. I just want to be happy with myself.
[Other] Thin by Grace Bowman?
/u/Bandersnatch-Cunt
Created: Wed Aug 10 03:41:02 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x1cwd/thin_by_grace_bowman/
---
This has probably been asked so many times but I can't find any legit PDF files of this book and I've been trying to get my broke ass hands on it for the better part of 5 months. I found an iffy text file but because I'm on my phone it's a big aggravating to read.
Does anyone have or know where to obtain the pdf file of this damn book? ): I would be forever grateful.
[Rant/Rave] Weekend Stress
/u/FaithHopeTrick [5'7 | CW 124 GW 119 |19.35 | -31lbs | F]
Created: Wed Aug 10 03:07:20 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x19fe/weekend_stress/
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I am really starting to dread weekends. The last two have involved binges it has taken days to recover from and my overall weight loss has slowed to 0.6lbs a week, which means reaching my GW by my target date is impossible. This weekend I have a bunch of friends coming to stay and the plan is to eat and drink and be merry all weekend and I just feel sick with worry.
I have this voice inside my head which says things like ‘don’t calorie count today your friends are here (or whatever BS reason there can be for not restricting) life is to be lived, don’t miss out, just order a pizza and chill out you can make up for it tomorrow’ and I find it so difficult to ignore the voice when I am having a good time with my friends.
Either they all order pizzas etc and I get a salad, which results in comments on my weight loss and diet and disapproving looks (for no good reason as I am a healthy weight) or I order what they have, telling myself I will leave half, then eat it all like a giant fat ass and my mood is ruined for the rest of the day.
I cannot wait to reach my GW and start maintaining, it will be a lot easier to function socially when I have more than 800 calories a day to work with!
[Other] I'm home
/u/woollyshirt [172cm | 54.7kg | 18.33 | -33.3kg | NB/M]
Created: Wed Aug 10 02:51:22 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x17t7/im_home/
---
I went away for a few days on a camp with a specific purpose I'd rather not talk about but it ended up having WAY more of an impact on my relationship with food than I ever realised it could have and I feel very broken now and I don't know what to do.
I thought eating would just be a quietly uncomfortable event where I might need to let the staff know that I would prefer a quieter space to eat or get a bit anxious around food but I ended up being very upfront about how terrified I was and ended up being essentially hand held through mealtimes. I didn't weigh or measure food at all while I was there, but I did continue logging and estimating. I didn't gain weight (and I haven't lost any but I also haven't shit since thursday and my diet has been very different)
I feel like my attitude to food has been completely broken in a way I don't know how to describe. I feel relieved that I can eat and not weigh things at least sometimes, but also terrified that this knowledge will stop me from being thin. I think in general I've just realised how lonely and unsupported I feel with all this food stuff and it's like my life has been turned upside down. I'm clueless and I don't even know what to do now. I still want to restrict but I still want to try and maintain for a bit. I don't know. I feel like I owe it to the worker who helped me so much to actually eat but also I haven't lost weight in three days and I want to fast but I want to not feel weak for work on friday and I just don't know any more. My home doesn't feel like home and my friends don't feel like my friends. My partner seems so distant from all this because I don't want them to be involved but I desperately do and. I don't even know what to do with myself now except sit in bed and cry or go to the park and cry. I was hoping that I'd have a nice letter waiting for me with details of my first appointment with mental health services but I have nothing. I'm stuck and scared.
[Goal] Starting my chocolate mono today
/u/beautyandbeast5 [5'2 | 123.5lb | 22.6 | 42lb | F]
Created: Wed Aug 10 01:48:25 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x11qt/starting_my_chocolate_mono_today/
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[removed]
[Tip] PSA: Tempeh has more calories than Tofu.
/u/CharChar12 [5' 9.5 |140lbs|21| Male]
Created: Wed Aug 10 00:30:00 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x0tok/psa_tempeh_has_more_calories_than_tofu/
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Today I went to this fancy vegan restaurant with my sister and I decided to add tempeh to my salad (I've never had it before). I expected the calories to be the same as tofu is but its actually like double.
[Rant/Rave] I find it so hard to believe that there are skinny girls out there who don't have an ED and naturally maintain their weight without restricting.
/u/couldbefatter [5'2" | 105]
Created: Wed Aug 10 00:19:34 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x0smf/i_find_it_so_hard_to_believe_that_there_are/
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So they all just HAPPEN to eat at/below their TDEE without trying? I get it's all about the overall average intake but HOW is that done without an ED?!
I think it's just now hitting me that I'll have to do this forever if I want to be skinny. :(
[Rant/Rave] weigh in tomorrow
/u/[deleted]
Created: Wed Aug 10 00:15:32 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x0s76/weigh_in_tomorrow/
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[deleted]
I got a new dress form and I can't stop staring at it trying to figure out why it looks so much smaller than I do.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Aug 9 22:08:00 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x0d80/i_got_a_new_dress_form_and_i_cant_stop_staring_at/
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[deleted]
[Discussion] Anyone else super picky about their food -- not just what's in it obviously, but how it's prepared? [Discussion]
/u/holly-mint [5'4" 23F 🌹 waist-- H: 36", L: 27", C: 33", G: 25"]
Created: Tue Aug 9 21:14:39 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x05yp/anyone_else_super_picky_about_their_food_not_just/
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Asked for a piece of toast with a tablespoon of hummus on it, got given cold bread that apparently had been in the oven at some point but had certainly lost any heat it had between coming out and being given to me. I eat so little now that when I do choose to eat something, I want to enjoy it, not just choke it down-- I swear I felt on the verge of tears over this!!! I know that's pathetic but it's true!!! We are living off partner's student loans right now so wasting food is not something I'm capable of because the guilt is just too much and we need that healthy food in the house to stay on track with weight loss. Does anyone else get extremely upset when you accidentally burn food, assemble it and realise it's too cold and can't be fixed, order something at a restaurant and it's not what you expected/tastes bad???
[Rant/Rave] Do y'all notice that "normal" is meaning "overweight" lately?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Aug 9 20:40:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4x012j/do_yall_notice_that_normal_is_meaning_overweight/
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[deleted]
[Discussion] How often do you guys eat? Because I literally can't stop thinking about food
/u/println-Hello_World [5'4 | 115.7 | 20.25 | 21.3 | F]
Created: Tue Aug 9 20:14:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wzx9s/how_often_do_you_guys_eat_because_i_literally/
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I have to eat every hour and a half. Otherwise, I would binge because I'm always thinking about food. I plan my snacks ahead of time so I know what I'm going to eat and when. I know I'm eating sub 900 calories, but I imagine it'd be more filling if I ate three 200 calorie meals and one snack rather than ten 80 calorie snacks.
[Intro] An introduction of sorts
/u/Fruit_Binge [5'1 | 134 | 25.3 | GW:125(for now) | F]
Created: Tue Aug 9 19:52:18 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wztog/an_introduction_of_sorts/
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Once upon a time, I used to be quite fat, and by "fat," I mean *obese*. Then, last year I found out about CICO (better late than never) and lost a ton of weight. I didn't own a scale at my lowest, but it must have been something like ~100lbs, maybe even less than that. Then earlier this year I got horribly sidetracked by medications that caused me to feel hungry all the time. I have not been taking them for some time, but I still lost a huge chunk of the good habits I developed last year. :( I had trained myself to never eat more than 1200 cals per day, and I used to mesure all my food, but all that is gone now. I'm so disappointed in myself, because I'm back at an overweight BMI, and I feel so powerless. I used to only restrict calories, but now I have to purge because I eat too much, something I didn't have to do back then. It seems I lost all my arduously acquired self-control. I wish I could go back to my old ways, when I was actually on my way to become skinny. When I was telling myself I would do anything to never be fat again.
This is why I am here. I need to get back on track, so I'm going to update my flair whether I lose or gain weight. I feel going public about my weight could go a long way to motivate me to get back to my good habits.
Sorry if I'm rambling, but I needed to get this out there.
"Bigmouth" my friend toldme she has been puking for a month now, I made this art.
/u/AmorosoMarcos
Created: Tue Aug 9 19:52:15 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wzto1/bigmouth_my_friend_toldme_she_has_been_puking_for/
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http://imgur.com/a/le0FB
[Discussion] I've found my binge trigger!
/u/Superderg
Created: Tue Aug 9 19:50:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wzth1/ive_found_my_binge_trigger/
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At least for most of my binges. Its lunch. If I eat anything before dinner I'm crazy hungry all day and eat so much then when it comes time to eat I feel deprived eating really low cal meals. I'll eat low cal but still be starving. So if I wait and eat an 800 calorie meal once a day I feel awesome and satisfied versus feeling deprived and binging.
Doesn't stop/explain all my binges but now that I've realized that I can at least cut back.
Sorry can't flair on mobile!
[Rant/Rave] thank goodness for my fiance
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Aug 9 19:49:25 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wzt9p/thank_goodness_for_my_fiance/
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[deleted]
I need some level of accountability
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Aug 9 19:41:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wzs1o/i_need_some_level_of_accountability/
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[removed]
[Rant/Rave] In the middle of a whoosh
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Aug 9 19:40:12 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wzrtq/in_the_middle_of_a_whoosh/
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I've literally had to pee 6 times in the past hour. If I'm not under 120 tomorrow morning I'm going to spit.
[Other] Pup I love and legs I'm hating slightly less
/u/notyourtoy [5'7.5" | 124 lbs | 19 BMI | -39 lbs | F]
Created: Tue Aug 9 19:38:22 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wzri0/pup_i_love_and_legs_im_hating_slightly_less/
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http://imgur.com/MKiX7S8
[Rant/Rave] That feeling when you overate and there's nothing you can do about it since you can't purge ;A;
/u/kpatable [5'9" | 125.1 | 18.1/18.5 | -21.9 | F]
Created: Tue Aug 9 19:29:44 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wzq7g/that_feeling_when_you_overate_and_theres_nothing/
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Is what I'm feeling right now. I had 2500 calories today. Recovery or not, that's too much. But I realistically know that will only cause at max a 1/4 lb gain since the low estimate of my tdee is 1600. I can lose that in two days. I just... I hate this feeling. And I hate not knowing how the next two days are going to go.
I just. Can't. Lose.
/u/IWillBeAnACup
Created: Tue Aug 9 19:08:23 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wzmu1/i_just_cant_lose/
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[removed]
[Help] Eyelashes falling out
/u/concuidado [4'11 | 89 lbs | 19.21 | -51| F]
Created: Tue Aug 9 18:30:37 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wzgvj/eyelashes_falling_out/
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Has anyone had this problem yet? I started taking biotin to help but I just feel like more an more keeps falling out!!! Any advice?
[Rant/Rave] Falling back into that b/p cycle...
/u/capture_the_excite [164cm | 55kg | 20.4 | F]
Created: Tue Aug 9 18:17:42 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wzetj/falling_back_into_that_bp_cycle/
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You want to know what I just ate?
6 tablespoons of peanut butter
4 muesli bars
... and a salad (with 3T of creamy dressing).
I am NOT used to this. I HATE purging. But this is the third day in a row I've done it. I know it ruins my teeth, I know I'll feel like shit afterwards, I know my kidneys probably won't bounce back this time, I know this could kill me. But *I still do it*. Why can't I stop? How do I stop?
At least there's nothing left in the house now.
[Help] Anyone currently on ADHD meds with ADHD?
/u/Alexa1p [5'5'' | 110 | 18 | -10.7 | F]
Created: Tue Aug 9 18:08:03 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wzdc6/anyone_currently_on_adhd_meds_with_adhd/
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I have ADHD and it is negatively impacting my life. I have a doctor's appointment in a couple days where I'm going to talk to them about it and possibly get prescribed Adderall.
I've taken Adderall without a prescription, and it makes restricting super fucking easy. But I've heard that people who take it regularly have the opposite effect, and end up gaining weight on it. Is this something I should be worried about?
[Help] Websites like Happy Scale?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Aug 9 18:02:49 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wzci8/websites_like_happy_scale/
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[deleted]
[Help] Mixed feelings.
/u/salamanderqueen [5'9"| CW: 159.4 | SW: 180 | GW: 120 | -20.6 | 19F]
Created: Tue Aug 9 17:57:13 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wzbm9/mixed_feelings/
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I've lost nearly 16 pounds since June, and I'm keeping up with my weekly weight goals pretty well! And yet I don't look any different. And if that was my only problem, I could chalk it up to me just being accustomed to seeing myself as fat. But almost all of my pants fit exactly the same as they did at my HW, only one pair of shorts is loose. No one has commented on my weight loss at all (is that selfish to want that?)
So, am I overreacting? Do I just need to wait a little longer before I start seeing results? Or am I just crazy???
[Discussion] Do any other people who binge, b/p, or c/s struggle financially because of how much money they spend on food?
/u/montagemontage [5'4" | CW: 🐮 | GW: 95 | -15 | f]
Created: Tue Aug 9 17:56:20 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wzbh5/do_any_other_people_who_binge_bp_or_cs_struggle/
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Payday is on Friday and I only have eight more dollars in my bank account because I ordered two pizzas and wings and c/sed them. About half of my income every month goes towards rent and the vast majority of the other half goes towards food. It's embarrassing how little control I have when I'm mid-binge and have no problem ringing up a $15 Domino's Pizza or $10 McDonalds charge when I could easily be eating on a couple dollars a day. One of my biggest motivations to beat my binge-eating habit and get better at restriction/fasting is to start having enough money to do things like get a hair cut (haven't in almost a year, despite needing to) or visit a dentist (haven't since I was in high school and my parents would pay for my visit). I also need to do things like pay off my student loans and actually open a savings account but I can't do it when I'm living paycheck-to-paycheck.
I guess I'm just looking to see if any one else is in the same boat. How do keep your head up when you're struggling with both an ED and financial woes caused by an ED? How do you deal with the guilt that you're spending hundreds of dollars on food that does you no good?
[Rant/Rave] 3rd day of binge, sweating like a pig.
/u/smokesanddietcokes [<3 ]
Created: Tue Aug 9 17:27:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wz725/3rd_day_of_binge_sweating_like_a_pig/
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Eurgh why? I feel all hot and sweaty. Even my legs and ankles are sweating. Since when did ankles sweat? I usually feel so cold constantly.. my skin is all hot o_O It was like this last night too, my sheets were DRENCHED in sweat when I woke up. My bed is gross.
I decided today at some point that I was gonna keep up the eating all week, make the most of it almost before the guilt set in and then get back to the grindstone with added motivation of living like a fatass for a week (with the added bonus of clearing my freezer and cupboards of food that wouldn't get eaten otherwise), but I can't take feeling like this tbh so back to usual tomorrow as per the plan before I think.. or at least maintenance. Or something. God I don't know, my mind is a blur, I can't think straight. Anything that doesn't make me sweat like this..
[Meme/Humor] When you doing binge control with your low calorie homies
/u/icantstopmeloning [5'5" | ~100lbs | 17.1 | ~-40 | F]
Created: Tue Aug 9 17:08:34 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wz3uh/when_you_doing_binge_control_with_your_low/
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https://i.redd.it/438g4c46ufex.jpg
[Help] Controlling 'the switch'
/u/Alexa1p [5'5'' | 110 | 18 | -10.7 | F]
Created: Tue Aug 9 16:46:23 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wz064/controlling_the_switch/
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I'm not sure how many of you can relate to this, but there seems to be a switch in my head that alternates between eating a lot of calories (1300-1900) and restricting to 500-800 calories.
It randomly switches, and I have no idea how to control it. Some days it will feel amazing to restrict, and I'll feel like I'm in control... and then a few days later I'll realize dammit, I want that pancake, and... eat it, and feel like horrible later, which will then lead to restricting.
Does anyone else get this?
[Meme/Humor] Damn Target, too soon.
/u/canwefloat [5'5 | 112 | - 19 lbs | F]
Created: Tue Aug 9 16:41:05 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wyzca/damn_target_too_soon/
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https://imgur.com/a/lnkSn
[Help] Found old clothes from my first time with ED and i fit it them although i am 13lbs over. Happy + confused + worried.
/u/cannibale101 [5'5 | HW:150smtg | CW:120,8 | GW:118 | 28F]
Created: Tue Aug 9 16:40:24 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wyz8f/found_old_clothes_from_my_first_time_with_ed_and/
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So my father gave me boxes of really old stuff i hadn't seen since i left home ten years ago. Back then, i was at the peak of my first time dealing with ED and what i weighted then remains my goal to this day (or at least, i want to get back to it and see what i wanna do after that).
I'm not at my old weight. I was 112lbs and my period had stopped, and now i am 125 with full raging regular periods. I decided to try the old clothes on anyway and damn, they fit!! They're even a bit loose!!
I thought maybe i weigh more now because i'm more muscular than in college. I don't think i work out more than back then, but maybe more strategically -meaning i actually follow a program created by professionals instead of just running, ruining my knees and doing crunches all the fucking time.
I still find myself fat right now and want to lose more. But what confuses me is that i actually thought i was pretty and skinny at that point, ten years ago ; am i not supposed to look better now, more toned and skinnier with a more defined, balanced muscle mass...?
Is this what you guys call BD? Shit, did i develop that too..?
[Discussion] What are some of your non-scale goals?
/u/cinamintoast [5'6" | 209 | 33.87 | -61 | F]
Created: Tue Aug 9 16:18:33 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wyvku/what_are_some_of_your_nonscale_goals/
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I work in a laboratory and we wear disposable lab coats. The company I work for buys white lab coats in all sizes, but they also buy blue coats in small sizes only (I don't know why). I, and most people I work with, just wear the white lab coats. My goal is to wear a blue lab coat.
[Rant/Rave] Grocery store haul
/u/YourChinaDoll [5'1" | SW: 169 | CW: 130.4 | F]
Created: Tue Aug 9 16:13:29 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wyuor/grocery_store_haul/
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Hi, all!
I wanted to share my super proud grocery store haul with you guys. I was really craving chocolate, so instead of going to the nearest vending machine and getting a chocolate bar, I researched low calorie chocolate options and went to the store to get dark chocolate covered raisins (110 calories per box). While I was there I got 35 calorie bread, laughing cow cheese (WHICH, by the way, I only ever bought the light kind because it has 35 calories. It turns out that a lot of the flavors have 35 calories. So many new doors here). PB2 (not chocolate flavor, because surprisingly I can binge on that), and good thins (120 calories/like 40 crackers). But most importantly, I didn't buy a whole bunch of bad food and just decide that tonight would be a b/p night. And I also didn't buy these tiny little chocolate cakes that were only 100 calories each, because I knew I would just eat the whole box. I'm so sorry I'm rambling, I'm just super excited at all these good decisions that I've been making. I really struggle with restricting vs b/ping. At this rate, I'll be under 130 for the first time since 6th grade in the next couple days!!
[Help] Halo Top in germany?
/u/sophiali1 [5'2'' | CW: 125 | SW: 138 | GW: 92 | LW: 97 | F21]
Created: Tue Aug 9 16:04:04 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wyt0n/halo_top_in_germany/
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Does anyone know if I can get Halo Top (or something similar) in germany? I would love to find out what this hype is all about and if it's really this awesome :)
[Help] How to stay focused on reaching UGW when people are complementing you on your weight loss?
/u/realbutterflybaby [5'1" | CW: 105±1 GW: 88±1 | -26 lbs | F]
Created: Tue Aug 9 16:00:24 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wysdu/how_to_stay_focused_on_reaching_ugw_when_people/
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I think part of why I completely fell off the restrict train for the past MONTH and have been binging uncontrollably is because of anxiety, but also because I keep getting comments from people who haven't seen me in a while raving that I've lost so much weight. I know being thinner doesn't mean I'm THIN but I think I'm subconsciously internalizing it somehow because I have been so out of it...? And it doesn't help that after eating I feel miserable and angry? Still hating myself but not able to say no to food or myself...
[Other] I just want to apologize
/u/AmAlreadyGoingToHell
Created: Tue Aug 9 15:21:12 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wyld2/i_just_want_to_apologize/
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To all the girls who probably think that I was staring at their boobs while actually, I'm being jealous at your chestbones.
[Rant/Rave] i can't win
/u/tamamayu_monogatari [5'10" | cw:117 | gw:97 | MtF]
Created: Tue Aug 9 15:11:34 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wyjne/i_cant_win/
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i got an "i don't want to see you make yourself ill" from a family member today. it really stung, but they've seen the self-loathing hate-ball i become when i try to eat "normally" and expressed concern about that, too.
people are concerned if i eat, and they're concerned if i don't. why can't i just be left alone honestly
[Rant/Rave] IT'S HERE IT'S HERE IT'S HERE
/u/smallpaint [6'2" | 165.2lb | M]
Created: Tue Aug 9 14:45:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wyeus/its_here_its_here_its_here/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/765f0f55781d4ef3a4951c5dd98cc67c?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=0f72b17474bb0c7b8bb947d5a40bdf06
[Rant/Rave] Asian-style soups are my favorite. (250 calories)
/u/notyourtoy [5'7.5" | 124 lbs | 19 BMI | -39 lbs | F]
Created: Tue Aug 9 14:26:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wyb4m/asianstyle_soups_are_my_favorite_250_calories/
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http://imgur.com/zeOhgOo
[Discussion] Nicotine Gum
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Aug 9 14:23:22 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wyamk/nicotine_gum/
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[deleted]
[Discussion] How often do you weigh yourself?
/u/H2OandCaffeine [5ft7 | FAT | -15 lbs | F]
Created: Tue Aug 9 14:22:49 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wyais/how_often_do_you_weigh_yourself/
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I've been weighing every day and its been stressing me out lately. I was wondering how often you all weigh yourselves.
[Rant/Rave] I love how simple restricting is
/u/lifetc
Created: Tue Aug 9 13:00:07 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wxuzj/i_love_how_simple_restricting_is/
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Burning out on recovery big-time, finally cracking and fasting again. I miss how simple fasting is, even if it isn't easy. It's comforting to not need to think about what to eat, or worry about weight gain - much easier to just drink water, drink tea, focus on anything else. It's black and white. Missed this.
[Discussion] 150 calorie or less meals to share?
/u/bchuk183 [5'6 | 140 | 22.6 | -10lbs | F]
Created: Tue Aug 9 12:39:49 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wxr6x/150_calorie_or_less_meals_to_share/
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I've been eating a lot of cucumber salads and zoodles but I don't want to get stuck in a rut. I'd love to hear some of your ideas!
[Help] My stomach hurts so bad
/u/thelonelykitten_
Created: Tue Aug 9 12:39:33 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wxr58/my_stomach_hurts_so_bad/
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I've been restricting to about 600 cal a day. Mostly soups and veggies. Today I work, I had a package of cheese and cracks and 4 Milano cookies in addition to my soup/Diet Coke and my stomach is killing me. Does this happen to anybody else?? I didn't even binge and it feels like my stomach is in knots.
[Rant/Rave] My coworker told me to eat
/u/Shelbolovesnate [5'2" | 100 | 18.95 | 35 | F]
Created: Tue Aug 9 11:46:17 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wxgyp/my_coworker_told_me_to_eat/
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Two weeks ago my coworker had noticed I was really pale a lot and I missed a couple days from not feeling well. She came over to me and said "Okay, it's time for me to be a mom and ask...are you eating?" Of course I said yes, but before she left for a two week vacation, she said "Now you eat and don't get sick!"
Well guess what. I fucking did. Are you happy now? Something else happened over her vacation that upset me terribly, and I had one of my longest binges in years. I gained 14 disgusting pounds until I finally snapped out of it yesterday and I've lost two as of this morning.
I know I can and will lose it all again, but I wonder what everyone thinks. This was a rapid gain, and very very noticeable, especially to her since she didn't see me for two weeks. I wonder what she thought when she saw me, but I hope it'll make her lay off me for a while.
I am on mobile and this whale is too ashamed to update her flair. :'(
[Rant/Rave] Made my day, I think
/u/birdpeck [5'8" | 107 | 16.09 | F]
Created: Tue Aug 9 11:32:31 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wxeak/made_my_day_i_think/
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So I was running by myself yesterday and as I passed this couple who were walking I heard whispered "She's hecka skinny". Really surprised me because although I know I'm thin, I know many of my runner friends are skinnier than me and I didn't think I was skinny enough for people to whisper about it like that. So it made me really happy! Except I know it probably wasn't said in a positive way, which doesn't really reduce my happiness but it's got we wondering more about how I look to people
[Other] My ~70 Cal lunch. Takeout style zoodles with miso soup!!
/u/Nude-prude [5"6.5 | 105 lbls | 16.68|-40| female]
Created: Tue Aug 9 11:07:48 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wx9kn/my_70_cal_lunch_takeout_style_zoodles_with_miso/
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http://imgur.com/WQKdSbn
[Rant/Rave] Restrict binge rinse repeat
/u/Tiny_peach [5'3" | 96.3 | 17.53 | -18]
Created: Tue Aug 9 11:04:06 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wx8ts/restrict_binge_rinse_repeat/
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Something I just realized. So dumb. Our memories may tell powerful stories but our bodies are undeniable testimony - I think of myself as having been locked in a horrible struggle with food, endlessly restricting and exercising, for years. But if that were really true, I would have starved to death long ago.
The reality is that when I am gaining or maintaining, my binges are frequent and/or big enough to offset my restriction - I can remember it as a time of starving and being hungry and barely eating anything, but that's just not true. It can't be.
One binge doesn't undo days of hard work, it's about trends and patterns. That's true. But one of my binges can easily undo a day or more - I don't binge like an anorexic on 600 calories of unplanned yogurt, I eat in units like "buckets" and "sheet pans" and "family-size bags". And if the pattern trends more toward binging than not, it's horribly easy to undo weeks, months, years of hard work in just a few weeks.
No more comforting words to myself about how everyone has bad days, or how one setback is easy to overcome. It's too easy to lie to myself about the balance of progress vs backsliding. Instead, I want my body to be proof positive that I'm living the way I tell myself I do. My outsides are going to match my insides, be evidence of the narrative, hold my scumbag brain accountable and keep it from hedging with "pretty much". We're gonna be air fuckin tight, y'all.
[Other] THANK YOU RUDE SIBLING!
/u/Skinnybabyshh [5'7 | 110 | -60 | F]
Created: Tue Aug 9 11:03:50 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wx8s2/thank_you_rude_sibling/
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So about a week ago my 12 yo brother was in the kitchen with me, I was having a bad day and reached for the doughnuts my mom just bought. As I reached he goes "Skinnybabyshh what are u doing, I thought you wanted to be skinny?" ... I haven't binged since. I lost nearly 4kg already.
[Discussion] Deconstructing a binge trigger + DAE feel guilty for feeling full on a respected plan?
/u/cannibale101 [5'5 | HW:150smtg | CW:120,8 | GW:118 | 28F]
Created: Tue Aug 9 11:00:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wx825/deconstructing_a_binge_trigger_dae_feel_guilty/
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Hi! So for about 10 years now, oatmeal has been my worst binge food for a few reasons. My mother used to feed me oatmeal a lot when i was a child + it's very filling and carb-loaded, making it extremely satisfying, both on a physical and emotional level. Also, it's been for years the one food that could actually help me see the end of a binge and force my mind back to earth because after it, my body is literally unable to take anything else in ; i reach my physical limit and just spend the rest of the night lying on my left side trying to handle the pain. In short, oatmeal is delicious, emotionally filling and physically unforgiving.
I've recently read Never Binge Again after a week-long torturous binge phase and decided that it was over. Like, forever over. Since i've proven myself many times that i can make permanent lifestyle changes if i want to, i figure i'm also capable of not bingeing anymore. And then, i read the article shared by someone on this sub about whooshing -or how one carb-heavy meal once in a while can help the body flush its retained water because of the interaction between water and glucose in our cells. I made 1+1 and figured i could turn tables, deconstruct the conditioning i've built around oatmeal and starting to use it in a positive way by controlling my oatmeal input for whooshing purposes -all this in an additional attempt to make some emotional damage control in the future.
I therefore plan to allow myself a -planned and measured- bowl of oatmeal about once a month. This morning i made myself a cup, added 1tbs of peanut butter, 1tbs of cocoa powder and a handful of frozen fruit. I'm not very good at counting calories but i think it amounts to ~300-350kcal. It was delicious, it successfully felt like an emotional treat even though it was planned & structured and i can easily go through my day with that and stay at a considerable deficit. Taking back my self-control, wish me luck!
Only thing now is that although the calorie deficit is right and i did my daily workout all well and i feel fine with not eating anymore today, i somehow still feel guilty about it. DAE experience that? I'm not sure if it's because i still feel as full as if i overate more than 2hrs later or because what i don't allow myself is the emotional comfort, not the food itself (which would be messed up but totally coherent tbh).
What do you guys/girls/people think? Do you ever experience guilt even though you respected your plan? Do you manage your emotions using food as working tools like that?
[Help] Someone Please Reassure Me
/u/questy-regretty
Created: Tue Aug 9 10:57:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wx7lk/someone_please_reassure_me/
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I high-key ate 4 Quest Bars at 2 am because who knows why. SO I'm fasting today but my irrational brain says I'm still going to gain weight because it was after 8 pm (my cutoff time. I normally don't eat anything after 8 pm ever. I have no idea what possessed me.) and I need someone to reassure me that it's not going to magically turn into fat just because it was after the magical hour of 8 pm.
Unless that's what's going to happen...?? (lol)
[Discussion] Daily Food Diary! August 09, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Tue Aug 9 10:02:20 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wwwwp/daily_food_diary_august_09_2016/
---
This is a daily food diary thread for August 09, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
[Help] How do you stay mentally sharp while restricting?
/u/Thunder2WonderThighs
Created: Tue Aug 9 09:59:12 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wwwb2/how_do_you_stay_mentally_sharp_while_restricting/
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I've finally broken my binge cycle and am back to restricting (Halleiluyer!!!!!!!!) but my brain is jello.
I have to keep up my performance at work because last time I heavily restricted I ended up being reprimanded by my boss for sucking. I can't afford to lose this job, how do you stay sharp, or at least above water?
[Help] Is anyone else Diabetic?
/u/emptymamii [5'5" | 101 | 16.8 | GW: 84 | 21F]
Created: Tue Aug 9 09:53:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wwv5y/is_anyone_else_diabetic/
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Pleaseeeee tell me someone else on this sub is Diabetic. I'm Type I (meaning I've had it since I was 5 years old for anyone who isn't familiar) and I've completely lost control of my blood sugars. I've been hospitalized three times in the last few months due to high blood sugars & my A1C level has jumped from 6.1 (under control) to 11.3 (basically sending myself into kidney failure in the not so near future if I don't get it back down).
I haven't been giving myself as much insulin as I should because I'm scared to gain weight from it. Whenever I'm restricting, which is most of the time, I don't give myself insulin all day because I don't want my blood sugar to go low. Low blood sugar = 100+ calories of apple juice or glucose tablets which is no bueno for me since that's basically 1/3 of my daily calories.
Anywayssss, if anyone else is Diabetic how do you keep your blood sugars under control? Or how do you manage your ED + Diabetes at the same time? FYI I'm seeing my endocrinologist tomorrow to hopefully get some things straightened out but I just wanted to hear if y'all had any helpful tips before I see her. Thanks <3
[Tip] For those of you who like a drink or two - good guide on calorie and carb counts
/u/thin_is_in [5'8 | 115lbs | 17.3 | -35lbs | F]
Created: Tue Aug 9 09:38:15 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wwsjj/for_those_of_you_who_like_a_drink_or_two_good/
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http://getdrunknotfat.com/
[Discussion] Question about what you find to be "thinspo"
/u/HowToBeAsian25 [5'3.5 |115lbs |19.78 |-19 | F]
Created: Tue Aug 9 09:24:37 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wwq2s/question_about_what_you_find_to_be_thinspo/
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On this sub, our ideas of thinspo vary from person to person (duh).
But I have come across a common anxiety amongst EDers, who are starting to get body dysmorphia that they fear that they won't be able to see themselves withering away in front of the mirror, or that their thinspo tastes will change to bonespo, even though it seems too intense for them at an earlier ED stage of life.
With that being said, has your thinspo tastes changed since you've started to lose?
Just to clarify, this is NOT a jab at people who's goals are bonespo! I can find beauty in most "looks", but it seems to be a common thought that has never really been asked yet.
For example, I would have been through the moon to hit 115, after I hit that GW I now want to be 108, once I hit that goal it's very possible I'll want to go a little bit lower. My thinspo pics are just a bit teenier than they were when I first started to lose.
[Rant/Rave] I'm terrified of my vacation next week
/u/supersizetrainwreck [5'9 | CW 130.7lb | 18.95 | F]
Created: Tue Aug 9 09:24:12 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wwq0g/im_terrified_of_my_vacation_next_week/
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I'll be in Europe and while I'd like to say that I'll be ok eating at maintenance, in reality I've been trying to eat at maint the past few days and watching the scale go up a little bit each day is absolutely killing me. I figured if I stayed under 1200 calories I'd be ok but what if I just balloon up the whole week and then all of this hard work was for nothing because I still won't be able to fit into my dress and I'll be in small country town in a foreign country with nothing to wear to a formal wedding. I'm at the lowest weight I've ever been in my adult life, I even had to find a different belt this morning because the one I was using didn't have enough holes, and yet I still feel like a fat bloated pig. I hate this disease and yet I give in to it because I tell myself that without it I'll never lose weight. I'll never have that flat stomach that I've always wanted or be able to wear the clothes that girls with flat stomachs can wear. I want to be better, but more than that I want to be thinner.
[Help] Scale giving different numbers?
/u/dec4y [5'3|cw:148|25.4|-16lbs|F]
Created: Tue Aug 9 09:23:42 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wwpxd/scale_giving_different_numbers/
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So this morning I weighed myself and my scale said I FINALLY dropped a pound on day 3 of a fast and it put me at 151.4, before i went to the bathroom or anything. Then after I peed, it dropped me to 150.0? (I was in my underwear for this one). I checked twice because that seemed like kinda a lot then went to brush my teeth, and after that I checked once more just to be sure and it put me at 150.6, so I took off my clothes again (light workout shorts and a t-shirt) and it had me at the same thing. I moved my scale a little because I heard that can help and then i was at 149.8! And I checked that 2 times in 2 different places, (including the original place) and it kept me there for both?
What do you guys do in a situation like this? In each case I lost weight so I need to log it to get an accurate graph on my apps, but I don't know which one to believe.
[Discussion] [discussion] How many calories do you eat a day?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Aug 9 09:16:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wwop8/discussion_how_many_calories_do_you_eat_a_day/
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[removed]
[Other] 182 Calorie White Sweet Potato and Carrot Fries
/u/SixForMySorrow [5'10 | 125 | 17.5 | -20 | F]
Created: Tue Aug 9 08:35:15 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wwh30/182_calorie_white_sweet_potato_and_carrot_fries/
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http://imgur.com/0Mm4Zos
[Other] Best part about restricting...
/u/linziboo [5'3" | 138 | 25.12 | -42 | F]
Created: Tue Aug 9 08:34:33 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wwgyp/best_part_about_restricting/
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Is that I actually feel cold or comfortable when it's super hot outside.
[Meme/Humor] Me IRL
/u/mermaid_puppy [5'4" | 137lb | UGW 115 | F]
Created: Tue Aug 9 07:59:31 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wwb1t/me_irl/
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http://gph.is/1UAoBbT
[Discussion] I cant be alone in this, can i?
/u/boredzoi [5'10| 135 | 19.35 | -15lbs | F]
Created: Tue Aug 9 07:40:51 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4ww84w/i_cant_be_alone_in_this_can_i/
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/u/Itsemurha had a thread reminded me of one of my biggest guilty pleasures- swapping cringey stories about our EDs! Does anyone else like sharing TMI stuff like that, or at least enjoy reading it??
I like it bc it makes me feel more comfortable about my own gross habits and it's so relatable and funny bc we've all had a TMI moment. It just like- *humanizes* having an ED? It takes away the glamour and cold mathematics for a bit and forces us to sit back and chuckle at our shared experiences.
Also I'm so grateful I'm not the only one out there with a 'poop stool'.
[Thinspo] Street Style Fashion X Thinspo Album
/u/throwaway912837198 [5'8" | 116 | 17.6 | F]
Created: Tue Aug 9 07:21:26 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4ww53i/street_style_fashion_x_thinspo_album/
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http://imgur.com/a/05Pal
[Tip] When you're forced to eat fast food, here's a list of options that aren't absolute garbage
/u/mermaid_puppy [5'4" | 137lb | UGW 115 | F]
Created: Tue Aug 9 07:10:22 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4ww3fb/when_youre_forced_to_eat_fast_food_heres_a_list/
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http://www.themacroexperiment.com/blog/the-iifym-fast-food-restaurant-master-list
[Help] How do I stop being skinny-fat?
/u/russianfrank
Created: Tue Aug 9 06:20:49 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wvw63/how_do_i_stop_being_skinnyfat/
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I was invited to a wedding in October. I've never been to a wedding before. I wanna look small and nice. It's not like I'm skinny, but at the moment I'm not worried about losing weight as much as losing fat. What would the best thing for me to do?
I'm really excited but I'm super worried I won't get where I want :c
[Rant/Rave] I am so angry
/u/Sadomaniqui [5'5' | CW 136 lbs | BMI 23.1 | -14 lbs | F]
Created: Tue Aug 9 06:04:20 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wvtoh/i_am_so_angry/
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First, I'm not a native english speaker, sorry for any mistakes. Also, will flair later as Rant.
Ok, so my mom made those little pastries yesterday. They're 160cal each and I'm trying to stay under 700cal. Naturally my fucked up brain told me they're so little, another one can't hurt and I ended up eating FOUR of them for breakfast. That's 640cal in 4 tiny pastries. I'm just **so** angry at myself and lack of self control. Now I can't eat for the rest of the day and It's only 6am here! Pfff.
[Discussion] Self-care and Beauty Q+A August 09, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Tue Aug 9 06:02:31 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wvtdk/selfcare_and_beauty_qa_august_09_2016/
---
Eating disorders are real, complex, and devastating conditions that can have serious consequences for physical health. Use this thread to discuss harm reduction and beauty tips, plus suggestions on how to build back up the physical self before and after engaging in disordered behaviors.
Please be wary of false advice and information. Be sure to research the facts before taking anyone's advice, no matter who they are. Remember that diagnosing members is unacceptable. **Anyone looking for medical guidance should seek the opinion of a medically licensed professional.**
^Self-care ^and ^beauty ^threads ^are ^posted ^every ^Tuesday.
^Have ^any ^questions ^or ^concerns? ^Comment ^below, ^or [^PM ^the ^mods.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FproED)
[Rant/Rave] Lbs to kgs
/u/sewnp [168cm | GW:90lbs | NB]
Created: Tue Aug 9 05:51:22 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wvrwb/lbs_to_kgs/
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My scale somehow got switched to kgs and needless to say I was panicked as shit when I first saw it. Thought it was broken!!!! Also I'm not dead! Not yet..
[Discussion] Gross/shameful ED habits/stories?
/u/Itsemurha [177cm | 71.9kg| 22.43| -47kg | GW: 60kg | F]
Created: Tue Aug 9 05:49:20 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wvrmu/grossshameful_ed_habitsstories/
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I'm sure we all have gross stories/habits from some point in our ED experiences.
For me personally, ever since I learned to purge without fingers it's become a kind of casual habit for me to sit down after eating, throwing up into a bowl while reading a book or whatever. I realize this is disgusting and a bizarre behavior for most people but I prefer it much more to hovering over a toilet for an hour lol.
Also, I still feel horrible for doing this but my mother travelled around Europe for an entire month, buying me fancy chocolate from wherever she went. I ate a little bit of everything, purged it and then chewed/spat out the rest. I enjoyed them as much as I could at the time I guess.. :(
Anyways, do you have any stories from your own experiences with an ED? I'm sure I'm not alone here!
[Other] Feelings about exes
/u/crapbeg
Created: Tue Aug 9 03:59:36 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wvf8g/feelings_about_exes/
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(again, only vaguely ED related & I can't flair arm)
Found out yesterday that my ex started dating a new guy 2 months after we broke up from our 1 and a half year relationship. Idk why it's triggered so many feelings in me - maybe because the guy is your typical skinny guy? I guess it's different since I'm a girl and skinny is the 'ideal' body type whereas that's not the case for guys, but am fighting the urge to binge on everything in sight.
My main consolation is that his new boyfriend otherwise pretty unattractive.
Feelings about exes
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Aug 9 03:59:34 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wvf88/feelings_about_exes/
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[deleted]
Looking for a buddy
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Aug 9 02:19:20 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wv4q0/looking_for_a_buddy/
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[removed]
You guys are the only ones who would understand how happy I am about this. It's a small victory but it will do for now!
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Aug 9 02:08:00 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wv3ix/you_guys_are_the_only_ones_who_would_understand/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/d7e525b458914f4788c0454015fc7e83?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=f8c1ff9c7e1772c76ad44bd75dfa5096
[Rant/Rave] [rant] (not really a rant) I saw a comedy show about body dysmorphia
/u/headfirstintospace [5'4'' | FAT AF | Binging is shite | 21 / F]
Created: Tue Aug 9 01:34:29 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wv027/rant_not_really_a_rant_i_saw_a_comedy_show_about/
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ok, i just.. idk i have to talk about this
so i am at the edinburgh fringe atm, which means loads and loads of shows and stuff
yesterday i went to the show of a comedian i liked (Davey Reilly) but had no idea what it was about, like what the topic was
and he started with it and it was about hos struggle with body dysmorphia and eating disorders and body image and stuff like that and i was really taken aback about it, because i didnt know he had problems with that
after the show i stayed for a small chat about it because, yes as someone who suffers from that stuff, obviously i felt the need to talk to a real life person who understands it
and suddenly (like a bad fanfiction tbh) anpther xomedian, at whos show i was yesterday came to the venue, who remembered me and they invited me to tag along and to go to lunch
they were both really nice about it, making sure i was ok woth the place we were eating at, asking me if ot was alright and if i was ok and i had the most amazing day
sorry this is a weird post, i needed to went a bit xD
[Other] Late night sketch ft. tea stains
/u/flyleafet9
Created: Tue Aug 9 01:13:53 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wuxrw/late_night_sketch_ft_tea_stains/
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http://imgur.com/Jp9qwWe
[Rant/Rave] Woah woah woah mega binge lol!
/u/smokesanddietcokes [<3 ]
Created: Tue Aug 9 00:55:44 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wuvog/woah_woah_woah_mega_binge_lol/
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Hahaha OOPS.
Yeahhh.. it's 7:40am here and I've just finished (erm, I hope?) some mega whacked out huge-ass binge. Put my Sunday 'binge' to shammmeee guys!
It started yesterday when I felt guilt over my Sunday binge. I decided to sort and half clear out my binge cupboard. I ate some of the chocolate instead of chucking it.. and for a while, that was okay, I went for a run, all normal. Then it was all systems GO.
More of the chocolate I meant to throw out/put in my baking bag. Tuna sandwiches. Cookies! Then I went to sleep for four hours or so, waking up at 4am.. and first thing I did was put a pie in the oven and eat it for breakfast.
But it was so strange. At no point, and not even now, did I feel bad. I felt ANGRY. I felt like I was murdering the chocolate, killing the food. Saying TAKE THAT! to the food. When the weight I would gain entered my head, I instantly responded 'Fuck it, so? I can afford to gain a few lbs, it wont make me obese. IM HUNGRY, DEAL WITH IT. IM KILLING THIS FOOD. I HOPE I AM 100LBS AT THE END OF THIS'. I felt legit *giddy* to be eating.
However, waking up and eating a pie made me think 'Okay, this is probably getting a tad out of control. Spicy bean pie is not breakfast, Smokes!'. Still didn't feel bad though, it was delicious.
I wont be eating normally today, I know that much. There will be more overeating.. but I think the binge-yness has stopped at least.
But tomorrow I am back at the gym in the morning. I will return to my usual eating routine. It'll be easier with my gym day routine in general.
I finally had a meltdown guys and you know what? It felt good. And I actually think I'm better of for it and can have a new start now. Lets be honest, it was gonna happen. I might binge on Sundays but they're always still kinda controlled and surrounded by stress and thoughts of trying to control it at least.. this was different. It was just fucking eating.
[Discussion] That anxiety when your SO goes out and has fun without you.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Tue Aug 9 00:43:21 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wuu5p/that_anxiety_when_your_so_goes_out_and_has_fun/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] Just a bit of a check-in. Probably more for me than for any one.
/u/08070427 [5'5" | 127.5 | 21.3 | -8 | F]
Created: Tue Aug 9 00:05:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wupid/just_a_bit_of_a_checkin_probably_more_for_me_than/
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But, its so nice to have somewhere I can kind of unload and not be judged about anything. And even though I may not respond to everyone's comments (this is my alt account so I don't like to stay logged in anywhere for very long in case SO sees), it makes me feel so so so so so much less alone/desperate/ disgusting to know that other people relate.
Last week I posted about being at my lowest point. I'm not going to lie and say that it boosted me into super successfully restricting again, or fasting like a mad man. But it did definitely open my eyes to how I need to sit back and listen to myself a bit.
I basically fast all day during the week, and allow myself to have a little bit of whatever when I get home. Once in a while it would turn into a "binge", but never anything like the last few weeks. I realized the difference was how much I focused on not eating anything AT ALL (even safe foods like broth). I was so desperate to make up for one freaking weekend that I basically self sabotaged everything. I'd push myself to a point where I couldn't even focus on what I was doing during a binge. I was making myself so desperate for anything, that food was all I thought about.
After the worst binge I've ever had, I took a backseat to my ED in a way. I felt gross, so I didn't eat. I started reading a book on overcoming binges, and became much more mindful of my thoughts. I also decided to stop weighing and measuring myself. I make the best effort to not do any body checks as well.
And honestly, I'm starting to feel better. I still think I'm gross, I still have a long long way to go, but I feel like I'm back to at least making progress.
Thanks for reading this rant, and good luck to everyone out there!
[Rant/Rave] my boyfriend
/u/iwillbesmall [5'6" | 134lbs | F | GW: 99]
Created: Mon Aug 8 23:54:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wuo5k/my_boyfriend/
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my boyfriend was gone for a month. he said he gained 8lbs when he was away. it was like a vacation even though he was working. he was drinking. eating out everyday. but it looks closer to like 18. hes fucking chubby now. seeing him gain so much in such a short amount of time. and being able to tell. its like..a reality check for me. how quickly things can spiral out of control. the good thing is now. he wants to go to the gym together and run everyday. but at the same time. im disgusted. he left. got chubby. and i worked my fucking ass off and lost weight. i feel like he is so lazy now. we both had breaks from each other and he just got fat and i got better. he's just..i dont know.....ranting...
[Rant/Rave] First Intentional Purge
/u/peanutsgobang [5'4" | 190 | 33.25 | -0lbs | F]
Created: Mon Aug 8 23:31:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wul2v/first_intentional_purge/
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So I purged. Like two minutes ago. I know it is a bad thing to do but I just couldn't have that food in me anymore. If I am going to eat that much then I should be willing to purge it all so I don't do it again. I felt a lot better afterwards, almost proud that I was able to go through with it. And happy that my stomach was empty again.
Maybe now I will be able to control myself next time and not binge. I wish I could tell my fiance, so that he would stop enabling me and help me instead.
I know it was a bad thing to do. I also know that endlessly binging is also bad. I guess it has to be a trade off since I have no self control.
I mean I wish I knew how to control myself, but I start over every day the same way. I try to be good then by the time I actually eat I have lost any willpower I woke up with.
[Intro] Long Time Lurker: Binge Eating and Accountability
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Aug 8 22:54:41 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wug4c/long_time_lurker_binge_eating_and_accountability/
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[removed]
[Discussion] Are your body goals the same as what you find sexually attractive?
/u/drunkonhypomania [5'0 | 128.6 lbs | 26.45 | -21.4 lbs | F]
Created: Mon Aug 8 20:15:42 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wtt1m/are_your_body_goals_the_same_as_what_you_find/
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I've been thinking about this a lot. I think I might be one of the few gay women on here, so this might not be as relatable to others, but I don't think I'm really sexually into the body type that I want to have, which is weird to think about.
I want to be tiny- but I don't necessarily want to be with someone that skinny. I'm really into curvy women like Christina Hendricks or curvier Jennifer Lawrence. I find women in the mid-to-just-above-healthy BMI range to be attractive, but I really don't want that for myself.
And, the weirdest thing about being gay is that I can assess my body from a "would I sleep with myself way" and know I can carry weight well for someone so short. I can pull off the upper end of healthy (about 7 lbs below what I am right now) and I have a decent enough figure. But I just don't want it. I hate the idea of it. I hate how it feels.
I don't know if this is just warped ED-thoughts where I can't stand the idea of being the "fat" one in a relationship or if it's me holding myself to higher standards... but I find it strange that the thinspo that motivates me daily isn't something that I'm sexually interested in.
What about you guys? Do you like guys/girls that are as skinny as you are/would like to be?
[Thinspo] Song Ah Ri is perfect.
/u/Someone_Who_Isnt_You
Created: Mon Aug 8 19:58:17 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wtq5l/song_ah_ri_is_perfect/
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http://imgur.com/a/duiXB
[Rant/Rave] Mothers: A Rant
/u/jippityjuniper [5'7" | 148 | 23.10 | -20 | F]
Created: Mon Aug 8 18:52:28 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wtjyy/mothers_a_rant/
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I love my mom. I really do. We're very close, and very much alike, which really is sometimes part of the problem. She's had issues with her weight her entire life and has been overweight since giving birth to me (so, 22 years). She's always talking about dieting and losing weight and how much she wishes she was as "small" as me...then in the next breath she'll tell me that if I could just lose my belly "pouch" that id be perfect. Or if I could just "tone up my legs" I'd look so much better. The other day she pointed out how I have stretch marks in a location I previously had no idea housed stretch marks...why??? Does she enjoy making me feel like shit? I could've cried. I really wanted to.
The other day, I was in the middle of a high munchie binge (embarrassing and why I don't smoke nearly as much as I used to) and she walks in, looks me in the eye and says, "You really shouldn't be eating this much. You're being a little piggy. You'll regret it later." No fucking shit, mom. I regret it right now. Thusly, I purged afterwards in the shower which I try to never do anymore.
What originally led me to this rant is that after I tell her CONSTANTLY not to buy certain things because I WILL eat all of it right when it's in the house, she brings home my favorite binge food today! Because she "knows how much I love these chips." I sometimes think she wants me to get as big as she is for whatever sadistic reason.
I don't know if she knows about my eating issues. Sometimes she acts like she does, but overall she generally supports my restriction in a way that she really shouldn't. But it makes it easier for me, which I guess is good. I don't know. Thanks for anyone reading this if you got this far, it feels more like jumbled word soup than anything else.
[Rant/Rave] Binged for a week *sigh*
/u/DenyMyHunger [5'7"| Fat! |GW 140| UGW 112|-7lbs | F]
Created: Mon Aug 8 18:50:15 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wtjnf/binged_for_a_week_sigh/
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(On mobile, can't flair)
So as the title says, I've binged for the past week and now I'm scared to step on the scale. I struggle with depression and this plays a major role in my binges and restriction. Sometimes I'll feel so bad I'll eat my emotions while others I'm feeling positive (when I'm taking my meds) and all like "I got this! I can totally do this!"
I'm a lot heavier than all of you here (over 200lbs) and I am so so embarrassed to update my flair to reveal my weight but...I wonder if it would motivate me?
Like, maybe knowing that you beautiful ladies and gents can see how fat and disgusting I am and read in the daily diary what I'm eating each day will spur me on to stop binging and keep at/below my 800 calorie goal? Does this make sense or am I just making up yet another "foolproof" and potentially impossible and embarrassing goal/excuse?
I don't know... I just needed to vent and this community seems like the one place people won't roll their eyes at me and I won't be judged for asking stupid questions. I just want to be skinny and its ridiculous how much I sabotage myself. I know WHEN I'M EATING that it's just gonna feel bad later and I'll regret it but I dunno... Sometimes I just zone out and block all of those thoughts.
Anyway. Sorry for the massive post and thanks for reading to the end <3
[Discussion] What are your hobbies? What do you do to escape your ED?
/u/macchiato- [5'5'' | 114 lbs | 19.19 | 19F]
Created: Mon Aug 8 18:40:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wti6z/what_are_your_hobbies_what_do_you_do_to_escape/
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I'm really passionate about skincare and makeup, as well as studying (pretty stationery completes me). I have a 'studyblr' section on my tumblr and when I am not on reddit that's where I spend my time usually. How about you guys?
[Discussion] What is your most embarrassing ED story?
/u/HowToBeAsian25 [5'3.5 |115lbs |19.78 |-19 | F]
Created: Mon Aug 8 18:27:43 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wtg6r/what_is_your_most_embarrassing_ed_story/
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Between the awkward conversations, purging, and the laxatives, I know we ALL have stories.
[Rant/Rave] mirror//camera disconnect [rant]
/u/bloodyunderwear [5'4" | 119 | 20.4 | -0 | 20F]
Created: Mon Aug 8 17:59:24 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wtbgd/mirrorcamera_disconnect_rant/
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I feel such a disconnect between the mirror and the camera. I can fairly often at least talk myself through the imperfections in the mirror, but the camera never seems to get any better. My stomach always seems puffier, my thighs bulkier... I know I'm not FAT but I finally had to admit to the 4 lb weight gain on my flair today and changing my BMI... that was really hard.
I'm telling my BF way too much about this and I'm worried he'll talk to my family about it.
Side note, has anyone else had a MONTH of the exact same weight after getting an IUD? I've been 113.6 for what feels like an eternity.
[Help] I need help to get back on track for this month.
/u/cheeekyslug [5'6" | UGW: 90 | -60 lbs since 6/20/16 | 19/F]
Created: Mon Aug 8 17:46:49 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wt9ei/i_need_help_to_get_back_on_track_for_this_month/
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At work on mobile, will flair at home.
Last week was shark week for me, went 4 days without eating then binged and I only lost 3lbs :( I was suppose to be fasting for the entire month but I've been receiving a lot of compliments lately and it's very annoying, mostly because I'm behind on goals before school starts.
I get triggered by any feeling of confidence. I wish I was suffering or miserable or stressed by something so I didn't have to eat as much. I just finished up my summer classes and I get less hours this month and I'm honestly thinking about quitting my part time job because of how accessible food is there. My other job keeps me from eating so that's okay but my supervisor keeps telling me how great I look and it's just feeding my ego.
Anyone have tips to get back into fasting? I have a lot of goals at the end of the month. I'm meeting up with one of my sugar daddies from last year when I was at 200lbs, I just want to impress him ya know? He's very athletic and young and good looking I was so embarrassed at the fact he liked me enough to buy things for me, and I was hoping he would buy me nice clothes this time around when we meet when I'm at my goal weight. Then there's also my stalker/rapist guy being on campus, I just want to be thin enough so he doesn't recognize me. I don't want to run into him and if I do, I just want to be invisible to him.
I also went from CICO to low carb, just not both. So I went from 100 calories to almost 500-600 a day because I would tell myself "well it is low-carb..." But then I just realized if I do CICO its too hard to even over carb in the first place.
I'm just so stressed out right now and I just want to EC stack until I get to where I want to be :(
[Help] How many calories would you *actually* count for this bike ride? Everything was pretty flat (one actual hill)
/u/goddamnroommate [5'6" | 143.1 | 23.17 | -50ish | F]
Created: Mon Aug 8 17:30:00 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wt6nc/how_many_calories_would_you_actually_count_for/
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http://imgur.com/31LkXjG
[Rant/Rave] bought a wii u yesterday [rave]
/u/turnonmyrighthand [4'9 | 86lb | F]
Created: Mon Aug 8 17:19:47 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wt4wf/bought_a_wii_u_yesterday_rave/
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didnt expect to play so much id forget to eat all day. i woke up looking extra tiny today and barely had time to shove a salad down my throat before work lest i leave without eating at all today. its hard to put down the controller for 10 mins to make and eat some food. wish id invested in a gaming system sooner.
btw im playing Legend of Zelda Wind Waker, its apparently an easy one to get sucked in to for long periods of time :)
[Help] Into/ need help
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Aug 8 17:09:33 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wt36a/into_need_help/
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[deleted]
[Intro] hello! intro/story time
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Aug 8 17:09:17 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wt34t/hello_introstory_time/
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[deleted]
[Intro] New here hi
/u/H2OandCaffeine [5ft7 | FAT | -15 lbs | F]
Created: Mon Aug 8 17:01:38 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wt1u4/new_here_hi/
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Hey there y'all. I'm new here. I've been cycling between binging and restricting for years now. Last binge cycle lasted about 10 months and I gained 80 pounds D:. Now I'm restricting again but starting from my all time high weight. I've always been fat but it's ridiculous.
Anyways. I've been fasting and eating 500 cal a day for the past while and managed to not binge at all until today. :/ I just binged on unhealthy food and I feel like shit. Ugh. I can't go purge because I'm living with my parents right now.
Anyways. Hi!
[Goal] Oversized clothing makes me feel so good sometimes XD there is no way i should be able to get an arm through juniors small (bonus flat tummy!)
/u/goddamnroommate [5'6" | 143.1 | 23.17 | -50ish | F]
Created: Mon Aug 8 16:42:31 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wsynj/oversized_clothing_makes_me_feel_so_good/
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http://imgur.com/1vLEDGs
[Rant/Rave] HUEHUEHUE [rant/rave]
/u/frailandbedazzled1 [5'11" | CW 142 | GW 125 | 19.17 | WL -33 | F]
Created: Mon Aug 8 16:31:52 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wswvj/huehuehue_rantrave/
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https://i.reddituploads.com/720f0d358cbd436c9792a9d6ba0b204b?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=15a9dc2879837408e8780479d1590376
[Other] Welp.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Aug 8 16:11:24 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wsth5/welp/
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[deleted]
[Discussion] Emergency (not really)! How to combat munchies?
/u/usmatade [5'5 | 124 | 20.51 | -20 | F]
Created: Mon Aug 8 16:01:47 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wsrt8/emergency_not_really_how_to_combat_munchies/
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Just smoked the devil's lettuce for the first time. I'm going to want to eat everything I see in a few minutes. What do I do? Any other ED smokers here?
(on mobile so can't flair)
[Rant/Rave] Exercise purging is such a waste of time
/u/notyourtoy [5'7.5" | 124 lbs | 19 BMI | -39 lbs | F]
Created: Mon Aug 8 15:51:27 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wsq01/exercise_purging_is_such_a_waste_of_time/
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I could not stop eating today. Just kept putting disgusting bites of food in my mouth over and over until I hit 1400 calories before lunch. I hated myself, so, I guzzled water and went to purge.
As per usual, I couldn't get anything up. I'm a friggin bulimic who can't make herself vomit. A total failure, even in my ED.
So now I'm hula hooping for 2 hours to exercise purge 800 of the calories. I'm sweaty, my midsection is getting raw, and I'm a disgusting failure at life.
EDIT: I just hula hooped away 960 calories and will be taking an extra-long walk with the dog tonight and hopefully I can get out of dinner. I can turn this around. Sorry for the rant. I'm just so close to my first GW and I keep sabotaging it.
[Tip] Info for those who are "stalling"
/u/_-TAWat-_ [5'3" | 31F | UGW 110.2#]
Created: Mon Aug 8 15:26:43 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wslov/info_for_those_who_are_stalling/
---
http://leanmuscleproject.com/how-whooshes-impact-your-weight-loss/
[Goal] I finally did it.
/u/peanutbutteredbanana
Created: Mon Aug 8 15:17:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wsk1t/i_finally_did_it/
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I finally hit the UGW of 95 pounds I set three years ago!!! I thought I was at this weight for the last week but I didn't have access to a scale. Seeing 95 pounds pop up on the scale made me feel so amazing. I cannot believe that I finally made it here. I feel over the fucking moon. It was so worth it to stay strong. I've lost 36 pounds, what's 10 more? I've been doubting myself for the last month, but forget that. I can do this. I can become beautiful and thin.
-no flair on mobile super sorry about never being able to flair!!
[Rant/Rave] Why the @$%& is thinspiration and anorexia reportable on instagram and can get your account banned, but scarier tags containing content like racism and misogyny okay?
/u/yousimperlikeaduck
Created: Mon Aug 8 14:20:34 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4ws9el/why_the_is_thinspiration_and_anorexia_reportable/
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If they are going to be politically correct, they should extend that political correctness to everything. This is bullshit.
I want to be able to post my proana meals and express how proud I am for being able to eat so little,and keep myself accountable by looking at my instagram like a food diary. I want to be able to be proud of my thinspirations
[Thinspo] [Thinspo] Park Choa, a living goddess.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Aug 8 14:19:16 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4ws962/thinspo_park_choa_a_living_goddess/
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https://imgur.com/a/AJE5V
[Discussion] What is the most amount of weight you have lost im a month? Did it stay off?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Aug 8 14:12:17 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4ws7tw/what_is_the_most_amount_of_weight_you_have_lost/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] Anyone else have family and/or friends that unknowingly fuel their ED?
/u/sprinkle1997 [5'1 | CW 138 GW 100 | -18 lbs | 19F]
Created: Mon Aug 8 14:10:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4ws7j8/anyone_else_have_family_andor_friends_that/
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Ever since I've started losing weight, my mom always comments on how good I look and how happy she is. She even admitted to me that at my HW (155), looking at me made her wanna cry...ouch. She doesn't realize *how* I lost weight since she's at work most of the day. Every time she or other family members tell me how good I look, it doesn't satisfy me. It leaves me with a bittersweet aftertaste. Yes I lost weight and I look better, but it leaves me craving a thinner body even more.
I also have a friend who used to comment on how much I ate and stuff. She's naturally skinny and makes it a point to make fun of people who are even a little bit fat, but not me. I guess since we're friends, but it always made me feel like she lowkey hated me for being fat. Now that I'm losing weight, if she sees me look at nutrition facts, calculate how many calories I will consume prior to eating a meal, or going to the gym she totally flips out on me. She'll rant and rave about how calorie counting is not healthy and I'm not gonna make any progress like that, that I shouldn't overexert myself. Yet before she was the one telling me not to eat so much and inviting me to work out with her? I feel like since she saw how much progress I actually made, she's getting upset at me. Not out of jealousy per se, but I think she wants to keep me around as the "fat friend" to make herself feel better. I'm not sure though, maybe it is genuine concern?
Anyone else have similar experiences with family and/or friends? Feel free to vent. I'm curious what others go through and if there are ways to deal with this, how?
[Rant/Rave] Mad about others losing weight?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Aug 8 14:07:18 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4ws6w4/mad_about_others_losing_weight/
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[deleted]
[Thinspo] Sabina Altynbekova is my newest thinspo.
/u/Someone_Who_Isnt_You
Created: Mon Aug 8 13:55:31 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4ws4qx/sabina_altynbekova_is_my_newest_thinspo/
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http://imgur.com/IO4BKym
[Discussion] Is maintenance with an ED possible?
/u/couldbefatter [5'2" | 105]
Created: Mon Aug 8 13:43:21 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4ws2eo/is_maintenance_with_an_ed_possible/
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I'm nearing a weight I'm comfortable at, but my maintenance calories at my goal weight is only 1200. I feel like I would be comfortable maintaining by continuing to restrict and have binges once in a while, as long as I am within a 5 pound range.
Does anyone else do this? Is it unrealistic? My messed up brain feels like this could be a natural and healthy way to live. Kind of like intermittent fasting.
[Tip] Just had an epiphany to curb my impulse buying at the grocery store
/u/mermaid_puppy [5'4" | 137lb | UGW 115 | F]
Created: Mon Aug 8 13:37:47 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4ws1cc/just_had_an_epiphany_to_curb_my_impulse_buying_at/
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Do you guys ever have a realization so dramatic and complete that you don't know how you lived before it? It's like the new sense of awareness, excitement, and complete control you got when you first discovered Halo Top.
Brace yourselves, fam.
Online. Grocery. Orders.
Maybe this isn't a revelation for everyone here, but I just found out that Walmart has online grocery shopping. This means I can (1) uber research the nutrition of everything I buy beforehand, and (2) I have no temptation when walking past the chip aisle. Gone are the days of me buying unhealthy foods because it looks good in the store. (Because if I'm being honest with myself, having even healthy junk food in the house isn't safe for me. Turns out low cal popcorn isn't so healthy when you eat the entire bag in one sitting. You become full of corn and remorse.) Also (3) this is super helpful for my budget. I get to see exactly how much I'm spending before I pay. And obviously (4) I'm saving so much time. I can look up what I ordered last time and reorder the same things. No more walking aimlessly around Walmart, no more accidentally buying full fat soy milk when I only want low fat. Most importantly, NO MORE DEALING WITH WALMART PEOPLE. Seriously, going to that store is my own personal hell. I don't mean to be a dick, but I walk in Walmart and hope half the customers never reproduce.
End rant.
[Help] [Help] How do you stop/prevent stress binging?
/u/seoulsum [163cm | CW 59.9kg | GW 53kg | BMI 23 | +2.9kg | F]
Created: Mon Aug 8 13:36:04 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4ws10e/help_how_do_you_stopprevent_stress_binging/
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So I had a 3hr long exam today and failed miserably. In other words: I spent my last two years (stressing and gaining weight) at uni for nothing! Not only that, I even have to plan my academic career and thus my entire future from scratch.
Today should have been a 1200 cal day ... I've already eaten 1600 cal (maintenance). Right now, I'm sitting in the dark at the dining table in front of some empty cups and bags and have been trying to stop for almost 2 hours. I haven't eaten anything for around 20 minutes but I still crave more! It doesn't matter what kind of food it is as long it's calorie dense and I'll eat it.
**TLDR:**
Very important exam
Failed
Screwed up future
Bad mood
Anger
Junk food
A lot
Infite loop
Help.
[Rant/Rave] So my friend just got these pills
/u/Skinnystems
Created: Mon Aug 8 13:31:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4ws06l/so_my_friend_just_got_these_pills/
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So my friend is around 135lbs she says, and she wants to lose weight before our boyfriend's get home from their tour and she's getting these pills from someone she knows that uses them. They speed up your metabolism. Her friend lost 25lbs in a month and a half!!! She says it's called like Topamax??? Or something.
Can I tell you how jealous I am. 😣 I wish I could ask her for some, but technically I'm already "tiny" compared to her... but I am not where I want to be. 😑 the struggle is real, I guess I'm just sharing my frustration lol
[Rant/Rave] My parents just moved in for 8 weeks, halp
/u/bumblebatty [5'7| 117 | 18.26 | -53 | F | GW 115 | UGW 108?]
Created: Mon Aug 8 13:16:15 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wrx7i/my_parents_just_moved_in_for_8_weeks_halp/
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omg
I knew this would be hard. They know about my past so I can't be too obvious. I figured, I'll just skip breakfast and lunch of the weekdays while I'm at work, then just figure out maintenance on the weekends. Also, I'm going to be cooking dinners so I can control that and make healthy lower calorie things. I'll be fine.
Moving in all their boxes. Why did they bring all this extra food? There are TEN bags of chips! TEN!
And soooo many other snacks.
COOKIE DOUGH??
Lots of chocolate. Ice cream. A whole boxful of cheese.
I was not prepared for all of this and I'm kinda freaking out.
It doesn't help that we simply do NOT have enough storage space for any of this. We buy a week's worth of food at a time, give or take, and now I don't even know where to put all these fucking chips let alone the food I actually want to cook.
I wish I didn't eat the past four days :(
EDIT: there's another box of snacks....
[Intro] A very lengthy intro.
/u/PutCoffeeInMyMouth
Created: Mon Aug 8 12:59:22 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wrtv4/a_very_lengthy_intro/
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I'm typing this out in my phone's notes section, and I'll be genuinely surprised if I wind up copying and pasting it to post. That will, of course, require another Reddit account, which sounds like a lot of work to me right now, but if you're reading this, lo and behold, I did it.
I'm on the verge of turning thirty in just over two months. I have been married for two years, have an almost-three-year-old and a six month old. My sons are everything to me, and my husband is a sweet and caring man, whom I love very dearly.
I work a management job in the tourism industry. I do little but sit behind a desk, frankly pretending to look busy. My weight, currently, is pretty unspeakable, although roughly 24 pounds less than my highest ever (which, surprisingly, was not during one of my pregnancies).
I was fat throughout childhood and adolescence. Upon graduating from high school, I told myself that enough was enough. I started counting calories, purging, and I slipped quite comfortably into a full-blown eating disorder. By the time I was 21, I wasn't sure of my weight (my roommate, exasperated with me, confiscated my scale) but I was all clavicles, sternum, and thigh gap. My size two jeans hung off of me, and I'd wracked up some incredible credit card debt from having to buy new clothes every few weeks.
Then, back home, a huge upheaval in my family occurred, and it suddenly struck me how pointless all this obsessive counting and starvation felt. I allowed myself food (my roommate just about fell on the floor when she came home to me digging into a pint of ice cream) and allowed myself to forget all that nonsense.
I graduated college hugely fat. I traded starving for binging, and started obsessively eating constantly. I moved back home. I met my husband. We ate and ate.
While pregnant with my youngest, I reconnected with an old fling. We began a pretty regular pattern of texting each other constantly, and I was beginning to consider whether I would be able to make it work with this guy-- living across the country -- and still maintain my happy family. He knew I was married, maybe shaky on details about my kids (he wasn't on Facebook or anything, and we had few friends in common anymore), but we felt that we'd left things unfinished, years ago. Of course, he knew me when I was thin, when I was something to be prized and coveted.
Then, all of a sudden, radio silence. Texts went unanswered. I was terrified of what had happened, but my fear was that, somehow, he found out I was fat. In the meantime, my husband found out, we had a short, emotional discussion, and then moved on. Somewhere in that paranoid, out-of-control time, my ED switch was turned from compulsive overeating to restricting. Like nothing. Click.
(I'd like to point out here that I don't believe that this one incident was the cause of my sudden need to restrict, but it's the most concrete part of the puzzle that I can pin down at the moment.)
I started counting calories. A reasonable deficit for my height and weight, but on the days I fell significantly under my goal, I felt great. Accomplished. In control. My husband also started watching his calories, and, being much taller and more active than me, has dropped more than I have, on a very high daily calorie budget. My competitive nature has been awoken, and I've since dropped my calorie goal some more. Suddenly, I'm back in the pool. When I've tried, so many times in the past, to force my ED switch back to "restricting," it's suddenly done it on its own, with no forcing or fiddling from me.
Of course, after eight years of overeating (and by that I mean a very disordered form of overeating), my weight is completely out of control, and I'm suddenly eighteen again, a fat girl counting calories obsessively, a ridiculous, sad "wannabe." Which is why I'm keeping to myself. I'm eating "normal" meals around others, and fudging my numbers on MFP for my husband's sake. I've dropped weight easily, and am back in my old fear-of-food mindset that held such a tight grip on my psyche so many years ago. I don't welcome it, really, nor am I excited to see its return, but I'm slipping into it, like a comfortable old hoodie, a bubble between the world and me. I'm not excited about the prospect of weight loss, even, although that is the goal and obsession. Rather, I sometimes feel like I'm starting a very long but unavoidable assignment. Resigned, I guess.
Anyway, it's back, I am not ready to try and stave it off, so here I am. Hi.
[Thinspo] Goals [thinspo]
/u/disbeetch [5'4'' | 144 | 24.72 | -24 | F]
Created: Mon Aug 8 12:38:33 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wrptg/goals_thinspo/
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http://imgur.com/AGM5LoM
[Tip] Kroger has shrimp on sale for $4.99/ lb
/u/strongerthanyouknow [5'5" |145 |24.4 | -12 | F]
Created: Mon Aug 8 11:59:21 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wrhz0/kroger_has_shrimp_on_sale_for_499_lb/
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Usually it's $10/ lb. At this price it's $1 per serving - 100 cals and 24g of protein!
[Rant/Rave] I had no idea stevia was this sweet...
/u/00110100-00110010 [5'4'' | SW 130 | CW 110.2 | UGW 104 | 19.3 | -19 | F]
Created: Mon Aug 8 11:36:36 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wrd7x/i_had_no_idea_stevia_was_this_sweet/
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Just put three packets into my 12 oz chai tea... I feel like my teeth are going to rot off from how sweet it tastes. But hey, zero calories!
[Help] Weight won't move after a weekend out?
/u/dec4y [5'3|cw:148|25.4|-16lbs|F]
Created: Mon Aug 8 10:39:01 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wr1vn/weight_wont_move_after_a_weekend_out/
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I hit a new lw on Wednesday of last week, but on Friday my boyfriend took me out to celebrate our anniversary and that included basically a lot of food. I still ate less than a "normal person" but a lot more than I usually do. Anyway, ever since I got home Saturday/weighed myself the next morning I've been stuck at +1.6lbs? It was exactly the same Sunday and today, even though I fasted yesterday except for one tiny tortilla strip that was forced upon me and some broth(and I worked out for half an hour anyway).
So anyway I was just wondering has something like this ever happened to any of you guys? Is there a way to make it go away and see how much I really weigh or did I actually gain almost 2 pounds from half a plate of nachos and a mocha?
[Discussion] Daily Food Diary! August 08, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Mon Aug 8 10:02:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wquzg/daily_food_diary_august_08_2016/
---
This is a daily food diary thread for August 08, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
Don't forget to update the [Leaderboards](http://www.weightlosscompetition.eu.pn/index.php) with your calorie counts and binges!
[Rant/Rave] I feel like I'm losing control
/u/DivingRightIn [72in | don't ask | don't tell | ~57.2lbs | UGW: 115lbs | F]
Created: Mon Aug 8 09:37:27 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wqq93/i_feel_like_im_losing_control/
---
Im currently filling up a tub to soak in because the cramps I'm experiencing are so severe I'm on the verge of fainting.
I took 15 laxative pills last night, more than I ever have. This was after another 2 day binge. I havent lost any weight since my last binge despite walking more, and eating between 500-800 calories. In fact I ended up gaining a pound which is what triggered the first binge day this time.
This isn't at all going how I wanted it to. I was supposed to be nearing underweight, and instead Im nearly 8lbs heavier than my LW. I feel hopeless, sad, and sick...
[Discussion] On using laxatives
/u/Saltycook [5'4"| 128# |22.4| -35# | Female]
Created: Mon Aug 8 09:32:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wqph9/on_using_laxatives/
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Not sure if this is permitted, but I was wondering what type of laxatives you as use on a cleanse. Right now for me it's been an osmotic lax that I take a couple times a day and it's good that unlike a stimulant laxative, I'm not running for the bathroom, it just feels more organic.
[Rant/Rave] the urge to binge is so so strong
/u/thelonelykitten_
Created: Mon Aug 8 08:15:25 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wqcjq/the_urge_to_binge_is_so_so_strong/
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I had a pretty crappy weekend food wise, but my boyfriend took me out for dinner and it was really nice and fun so I don't feel TOO bad about it. I've been restricting heavily during the week but work gives us free snacks(chips, candy, etc) and I can feel myself wanting to grab a bag of chips. I need to stay strong and get my usual 80~ cal soup and not binge. Wish me luck.
[Help] Purge block?
/u/saintandserpent
Created: Mon Aug 8 07:57:53 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wq9pr/purge_block/
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[removed]
[Meme/Humor] Anyone else feel like this? It describes me pretty well if you replace 'school' with 'work'.
/u/FakingReallyWell [5'5.5" | 134 lbs | 22.1 | -22 lbs | F]
Created: Mon Aug 8 07:03:15 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wq1hi/anyone_else_feel_like_this_it_describes_me_pretty/
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https://i.imgur.com/qX1pZdx.jpg
[Rant/Rave] I posted that I'd "officially" gained, but this morning the scale says 122. LOL whoops XD
/u/kpatable [5'9" | 125.1 | 18.1/18.5 | -21.9 | F]
Created: Mon Aug 8 06:50:27 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wpzky/i_posted_that_id_officially_gained_but_this/
---
I don't know how this is possible, BUT I double, triple, quadruple, and quintuple+ checked, AND I did it different parts of my apartment (to make sure the flooring wasn't messing things up). I also checked on my backup scale (which I don't primarily use because it isn't as precise, but I keep it for occasions like these), and it confirmed it!!!! Obviously I'm not assuming that I've "officially" lost this much weight, either - this weigh in will be averaged into my weekly weight, as usual - but it feels AWESOME to know that I actually haven't gained!!!! And 122 is a new LW since high school, 10 years ago. FUCK YES.
[Help] This is the only place I feel like I can ask and get a real answer
/u/notmyrealaccount3489
Created: Mon Aug 8 06:29:10 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wpw9z/this_is_the_only_place_i_feel_like_i_can_ask_and/
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Just a quick intro, I've always had issues with disordered eating, but over the last couple of I've been a lot better, but I still struggle at times. Because of this, I know that some of the things I am doing that I will mention in this post are 'unhealthy', and posting in other subreddits has just resulted in people lecturing me about how I need to get help etc, and that's not something I want to do or feel I need to do right now.
I wanted some advice and opinions on how I'm feeling with the way I'm eating/living right now. Basically, I'm currently overweight due to compulsive/binge eating, and having stopped purging quite a long time ago. So I'm restricting what I eat at the moment to get back down to what I consider an acceptable weight. I've done this many times in the past, but about 4 months ago I became vegetarian, and right now I'm 95% plant-based/vegan in my diet (this is brand new to me). I've also started taking diet pills again (ECA stack), but again I've taken these before with no issue.
So the last week(ish), I've been feeling very sick when I've gone without food for more than about 5 hours. I don't have much of an appetite due to the pills, but the nausea nags me to eat. This has not really happened to me before (as far as I can remember). I've had normal hunger pains, but never this horrible sickly feeling - which goes away if I eat.
Just wondering if anyone here is familiar with this - the only explanation I can come up with is that its related to my change in diet, or if I've developed some kind of intolerance to the pills since the last time I was taking them? Any advice would really be appreciated :)
[Other] I may have over done it a bit....
/u/Lailora [171 cm| 74kg | 25.5| -1kg | F]
Created: Mon Aug 8 06:28:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wpw77/i_may_have_over_done_it_a_bit/
---
Well hello sweeties!
(Sorry no flair, on my phone)
Maybe some of you remember I had a crash and burn experience about a month ago, gained a shit tone of weight over the summer at my parents...
Well got back home last week and got real motivated to get my life (weight) back on track!
I was planing on 3 times a week at the gym and was really pumped!
My Husband was going to join me, so yay for getting fit together!
It was quite late and we were the only ones at the gym. I showed him how to do deadlifts and all was good.
Then he wanted to try and do some bench presses, sure I spotted him, then he says that I should try.
I have literally never had any time of strength in my arms and biceps ever!
Reluctantly I try 20kg (about 40lbs).
I manage three lifts and I'm done.
I don't think a about it much, we go home.
The next day....HOLY CRAP!!! My arms are falling off!!!! For the next five days I'm unable to stretch my arms out, I couldn't even load the dishwasher!
Sooo, yeah going back tomorrow. Still gonna do a couple of presses 😀
But at a much lower weight!
In a weird sadistic way, that burn felt real good, like I'm crying from the pain, but the pain means I'm getting stronger!
Lol I know lm weird, but wanted to share ...something else then me whining about my lack of discipline 😂
Hope all of you have a great day!❤️
[Discussion] Weekly Stats Update! August 08, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Mon Aug 8 06:03:35 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wpsnc/weekly_stats_update_august_08_2016/
---
This is the weekly status thread for August 08, 2016.
The weekly status thread is to help motivate our users, and to eventually see how far they've come! Be it for weight loss, weight gain, or maintaining- everyone is welcome. Previous updates are archived [here.](http://www.reddit.com/r/proED/wiki/archives)
Please include the following information (with all necessary units of measurement):
* Height:
* Current weight (CW):
* Highest weight (HW):
* Lowest weight (LW):
* Goal weight (GW):
* Ultimate goal weight (UGW):
* Weight lost (WL):
* BMI: ([Use this to calculate your BMI](https://people.maths.ox.ac.uk/trefethen/bmi_calc.html))
* Age:
* Gender expression:
Here's a handy-dandy copy/paste of the above format:
* Height:
* CW:
* HW:
* LW:
* GW:
* UGW:
* WL:
* BMI:
* Age:
* Gender expression:
^Status ^threads ^are ^posted ^every ^Monday.
^Have ^any ^questions ^or ^concerns? ^Comment ^below, ^or [^PM ^the ^mods.](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose?to=%2Fr%2FproED)
[Rant/Rave] Endorphins from fasting
/u/sveltevelvet [5"8 | GW: 105-115 | -16 lbs | 18F]
Created: Mon Aug 8 05:12:21 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wpmfv/endorphins_from_fasting/
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Do any of you feel really really good about yourself when you fast? I've started to fast (as opposed to just restricting.. for about 48 hours each time)* and I feel kind of amazing, like kind of tingly if that makes sense? I hope it's not from lack of electrolytes lmao. And as someone pointed out a few days ago going to bed with an empty stomach feels so reassuring even if it prevents me from sleeping..
[Rant/Rave] Think I'm just destined to be a fatass tbh.
/u/smokesanddietcokes [<3 ]
Created: Mon Aug 8 04:41:25 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wpj0q/think_im_just_destined_to_be_a_fatass_tbh/
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So I tried to control my Sunday intake.
I did well during the day. Didn't snack on anywhere near as much. I had a nice breakfast and a nice lunch with my partner. Big cals, but healthy, and great success compared to previous weeks for Sunday daytime. I snacked on veggies, salad, and a small handful of peanuts.
I had all my veggies to eat at night at my usual binge-time to fill me up. I'm talking HUNDREDS of calories worth of mainly veggies, broth, then some lentils (and 150g cottage cheese too, to mix with mushrooms). The aim was to stuff me enough so I wouldn't reach for chocolate and cookies. I also had 500g fage with sweetener to have as a pudding - that's alot fo fucking fage, guys. So it was a lot of calories, around 1000, but it was a huge mass of food for that and things that *should* fill me right up..
I cooked up the veggie bowl, it was glorious I gotta say. A big pyrex casserole dish filled with broccoli, cheesy garlic mushrooms, butternut squash, roasted peppers, lentils and broth.. I felt sure it would fill me up and at least limit the chocolate binging, especially with the fage afterwards. I ate all the veggie bowl and ALL the 500g fage at my usual binge time, around midnight. Delicious! And yep, I felt stuffed! Healthy binge, right!
2 hours later, I started to get hungry. It was bizarre. I told myself.. "*that's impossible, utterly impossible. It's emotional, mental, because you're expecting chocolate. Just try to go to sleep..*"
I tried so hard.. but my stomach ended up feeling *empty*. It had felt stuffed for about an hour, but that was it before it seemingly started to feel empty again. I couldn't sleep because of it, as if I had been fasting/restricting all day?! I told myself, okay, don't panic. Have a nice sandwich, that'll fill you up, and you'll be able to sleep. It didn't. I said fuck it and grabbed some mini cookies and that just fucked everything anyway. Ended up having the huge sandwich and around 1000kcals worth of chocolate *still* before I eventually nodded off. So, basically, I didn't prevent any binging.. I just added 1000kcals worth of vegetables and fage on top of it.
WHAT. Just what the fuck. How can I eat like that? I havn't even restricted much at all this week.. and I had eaten over maintenance both Friday and Saturday just before so I wasn't even starving.
On top of that, I woke up drenched in sweat after getting night sweats. *Sexy*... that hasn't happened for a while. FML.
I don't want to give up on the new plan. The week went *so well* and I freaked out about eating more at times.. but generally felt okay. I even got excited that I might see some muscle growth and recomp, since my extra calories were totally healthy and nutritionally sound and all brilliant. But no, despite all my preparation and good intentions, I fucked it up Sunday night and ended up stuffing *more* cals in with the veggies.
Any advice appreciated.. but seriously think I'm just destined to be fucking fat at this point.
[Rant/Rave] went to a birthday bbq this weekend...
/u/lotuslotad [5'6 | 147.2lbs | 24.08 | -20.8lbs | F]
Created: Mon Aug 8 04:16:33 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wpgci/went_to_a_birthday_bbq_this_weekend/
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...and I absolutely stuffed my face and drank a whole bottle of wine. I must have eaten about 2000 calories and I don't even know why. I wasn't even hungry.
I got home and purged on purpose for the first time.
I felt so much better afterwards, but I'm worried about adding b/p to my restricting and now I kinda hate myself.
I used to have more control
[Rant/Rave] So Relieved to be Back Home!
/u/BlackFlagWhiteSails [5'5" | 113.6 | 18.9 | F/23]
Created: Mon Aug 8 02:15:33 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wp3vv/so_relieved_to_be_back_home/
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I've been on vacation with my extended family for over a week (!!) and I just got home and I opened my refrigerator and I cried.
I was coping well and I was able to forget about food and I had a really great time, but holy fuck my family cannot even accept that I'm a vegetarian. And all week getting asked about where I'm getting my protein and everything being cooked for me and being taken to steak and seafood restaurants. Ugh. I just had to touch my fages and my laughing cows and my box of quinoa and I'll go out tomorrow and buy spinach and it's just so fucking nice to feel like I'm a person making their own decisions about nutrition instead of a child or pet being handed food and told to eat.
Camping and hiking and spending time with everyone was really fun and I had a great time but all the time in the back of my head was this scared unsure person losing her mind and breaking down everytime it came time to have a meal.
I still haven't gotten on the scale yet so... wish me luck everyone!
[Other] I'm an art educator who has struggled with an ED since high school. I thought I would share some of my past pieces depicting the emptiness and chaos that has accompanied my journey.
/u/Artsychic2000 [5'6" | CW: 136 UGW: 120 | 21.9 | F]
Created: Mon Aug 8 02:04:01 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wp2qw/im_an_art_educator_who_has_struggled_with_an_ed/
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http://imgur.com/a/adn1p
[Help] How much of weight lost during fasting is water/food weight?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Mon Aug 8 00:37:08 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wou52/how_much_of_weight_lost_during_fasting_is/
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[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] Fuck fuck fuck
/u/Brannibal-Lector
Created: Sun Aug 7 23:25:24 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4womea/fuck_fuck_fuck/
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I have a friend's wedding to go to next weekend and I'm not anywhere near my gw and I'm spending the week at my parent's house which means purging is out of the question and parents know about my past history with ED but not that I've relapsed and I'm panicking because I have a week to lose 5lbs and I know it isn't going to happen it's so unrealistic. I hate that everyone knows about my history because I can't get away with *anything* when I'm around them now and I'm just freaking out guys. I don't even have a dress for the damn wedding and I don't want to shop at all because I'm nowhere near where I should be and u feel fucking gigantic.
Sorry for the rant I'm just so stressed and I can't stop thinking about it. And then I feel like an asshole because I want to show up and be worryingly thin and I'm so selfish because it's supposed to be someone else's day and I am (as usual) making it all about myself.
[Rant/Rave] My biggest nightmare actually ended up saving me!
/u/FUCKuNSALTEDcROUTONS
Created: Sun Aug 7 22:55:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4woj09/my_biggest_nightmare_actually_ended_up_saving_me/
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Potential binge turned into an accidental fast and I couldn't be happier. So the fair is in town and I went yesterday with my friends and I was so scared I would end up binging on all the food. I ended up agreeing just because walking around the fairgrounds for 10 hours in the hot sun meant lots of sweating and steps taken but literally everywhere I looked something was delicious, they had freakin deep fried cookie dough!!! Somehow I managed to go the entire day fasting using the "if I eat the rides will make me sick" excuse and finished the day with 2 diet cokes and chugging water. Today I didn't want to break the streak so fasting day two! (On mobile so can't flair yet)
[Discussion] [discussion] what's your go to low cal meal?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Aug 7 22:37:51 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wogun/discussion_whats_your_go_to_low_cal_meal/
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[deleted]
[Discussion] Occupation?
/u/Alexa1p [5'5'' | 110 | 18 | -10.7 | F]
Created: Sun Aug 7 21:55:19 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wobw5/occupation/
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If you're a student or are planning on entering a specific occupation, what is your field of interest? I was inspired by the 'Age' post, it's really interesting for me to learn more about the people who participate in this community.
I plan on becoming a front-end developer.
[Help] Low-Cal Alcohol?
/u/Alexa1p [5'5'' | 110 | 18 | -10.7 | F]
Created: Sun Aug 7 21:41:42 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4woaaf/lowcal_alcohol/
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I have alcoholic tendencies. I never get blackout drunk, but I love alcohol and typically drink a beer every other day.
However, it also has the annoying tendency to add a fuckton of calories I don't need. Most beers are about 150-190 calories, that's fucking crazy.
I can't drink straight vodka, as the people I live with are not fans of alcohol and would definitely consider that to be taboo.
Does anyone have any mixed drinks that serve as their go-to? I love beer more than most other drinks, but it sets me back too much.
[Discussion] Videotaped my binge purge day again
/u/anonymousbrahette [5'6'' | CW 163 |]
Created: Sun Aug 7 21:21:00 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wo7pe/videotaped_my_binge_purge_day_again/
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OEb0_F6ZG6E
seriously tho I feel like I tell myself every time
"this" time will be my last time and it never is...
I really don't want to repeat this tommorow :/
[Intro] back after forever; basically another intro
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Aug 7 21:20:51 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wo7ol/back_after_forever_basically_another_intro/
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[deleted]
[Meme/Humor] Same tho
/u/goddamnroommate [5'6" | 143.1 | 23.17 | -50ish | F]
Created: Sun Aug 7 21:20:41 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wo7nt/same_tho/
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http://imgur.com/lWixNaN
[Discussion] Where does everybody shop?
/u/thelonelykitten_
Created: Sun Aug 7 21:07:37 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wo60r/where_does_everybody_shop/
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Hi all. I've clothes and shopping but lately I feel like shit anytime I go to buy something new. I feel so fat and disgusting in clothes. I've been on the hunt for some oversized sweaters for fall so I can be cute/cozy and hopefully not look like a fucking whale. Where do you guys shop?
[Intro] (intro) I need to fast tomorrow
/u/Superderg
Created: Sun Aug 7 21:05:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wo5sw/intro_i_need_to_fast_tomorrow/
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I usually live by restriction but I've been on a binging nightmare this week. I have no idea what the hell has happened. Its been an emotionally tiring week, and I haven't been able to get myself under control. I'm hoping a day of true fasting will correct it and empty my stomach out again. I'm planning on sleeping late, working, then going to bed after. Can't eat if you're sleeping! I just want to commit to it and can't really tell anyone else. Thanks!!!
Can't flair on mobile!!
[Rant/Rave] Having mixed feelings
/u/boneobsessed [5'4" | Sw 173lbs | Cw 158.2lbs | -14 lbs | Gw 95lbs | F]
Created: Sun Aug 7 21:03:04 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wo5eu/having_mixed_feelings/
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Just learned that my former online friend/ultimate thinspo had gastric band surgery and photoshops the hell out of all her pictures. She's a reasonably popular alternative model and I found some websites talking about the photoshop/surgery. I'm quite pissed honestly because she totally lied to me that she "worked hard" to become the weight she is. She photo shops a thigh gap in every picture and makes her waist smaller. I don't know how I never noticed this before because it was done quite badly too. There was a candid photo taken of her by a disappointed fan and it literally looks like 40 lbs difference from the fans photo and the shopped photo she posted later that day. I don't know why people think they can get away with pretending they're something that they're not, the truth always comes out in the end. I literally never photoshop my body in my pictures. I look the way I look and I don't want to fool anyone. This whole ordeal makes me want to restrict even further and work out harder, partially because I'm pissed that she claimed she "worked hard ". This is truly working hard. It's not difficult to get off ones ass and control portions. I love that everyone I've seen on here is authentic. You all work to achieve your goals and don't take short cuts. It's really inspiring. I really hope one day I can be brave enough to post a before and after. Maybe even be someone's real thinspo. I hope everyone is on track with their goals! 💖
[Intro] New here! Not sure where to start soooo here goes.
/u/Scooter_Boots
Created: Sun Aug 7 20:56:59 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wo4mp/new_here_not_sure_where_to_start_soooo_here_goes/
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Not exactly sure where to start, but here I am!
Like a lot of folks, I've had body and eating issues since I was a teenager. Long story short, here I am in my late 20's and in the past 3 years I have gone from my highest (172lbs) to my lowest (122 lbs) and the past 6 months have put me in a position where I don't even want to look at the scale to know how much I weigh anymore.
Historically, my relationship with food has been centered around my relationship with my significant other during a given time period. I had a girlfriend who loved to smoke weed and cook with me, a fiancee who (in retrospect) may have had some kind of feeder tendencies, and a relationship with someone who became injured and I had to prepare all of our meals. Just typing this out now is really opening my eyes to the patterns I couldn't see before.
In the past 3 months I've lost my job, moved, and ballooned into this person I don't even recognize. Literally. I have gained so much weight I don't want to know if I've topped my previous highest weight or even look in the mirror when I'm taking a shower. I'm dating a wonderful man now but I can't bring myself to want to have sex because all I can think about is how I've lost all control and I'm like a piece of jello flapping around in the bedroom.
But I'm here because I've had ENOUGH. I am just *exhausted* from having my personal relationships shape my relationship with food, which shapes how I feel about myself, which effects my relationships. blehhhh
This post probably isn't for everyone out there, and maybe I'm coming off as whiny. I just miss that feeling when I started restricting and noticed my collarbones or my hips for the first time. It was amazing! I felt so beautiful, in control, and I could tell the way other people treated me was different. I can tell it's different now that I'm bigger once again too.
The other day something just kind of clicked in my head and I said "fuck it! nothing tastes as good as the way I felt when I was losing" So I downloaded MFP, opened my dusty folder of thinspo, and brought out the bronkaid. I'm scared but so determined this time. This sub seems so full of encouragement and wonderful people that I'm hoping this silly intro story isn't too off putting.
Working on adding my stats. Hopefully I posted/formatted this right. Like I said, I'm new.
[Goal] Weigh In: Aug 7, 2016
/u/duckybird0407
Created: Sun Aug 7 20:54:11 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wo4b0/weigh_in_aug_7_2016/
---
121.6 lbs
Thigh: 20.1
Arm: 10
Waist: 25.5
Being pear shaped kinda sucks if you want a thigh gap. On the other hand, loving the collarbones!
/u/Ilovemybishies87 [5'8"| CW: 151 GW: 130 | F]
Created: Sun Aug 7 20:44:49 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wo34q/being_pear_shaped_kinda_sucks_if_you_want_a_thigh/
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http://imgur.com/dUX9gTW
[Discussion] What makes you binge?
/u/pcrnography [5'6" | -55 lbs | nb]
Created: Sun Aug 7 20:36:59 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wo24n/what_makes_you_binge/
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Anything specific? Do you ever wake up and know how your day will go? Or does it happen suddenly?
[Help] Post Binge help???
/u/thirdocean
Created: Sun Aug 7 20:23:01 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wo0bu/post_binge_help/
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I had a burger from McDonald's and almost an entire large Dr Pepper. I feel so bloated and fat but I'm trying not to purge. My teeth have stains and stuff. And I don't know what to do. I'm panicking and I hate myself. What do I do?
Can't flair on mobile
[Rant/Rave] That extra push I needed.
/u/ceru1eus [67" | CW 122 | SW 122 | GW 110 | F]
Created: Sun Aug 7 20:19:48 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wnzw1/that_extra_push_i_needed/
---
I have to wear professional clothes later this week. Because of the weight I gained over the summer, my old ones don't fit - they look inappropriately tight on my thighs. I'm really upset about it, but on a positive note, maybe this is the final push I needed to get me going in the direction I want. I'm trying to refocus my sadness into motivation. Best of luck with a fresh week, everyone.
[Goal] Feeling SO happy with my body right now but tattoos would be telling in a progress picture.
/u/PermaFriday [5'3|111|19.7|27lbs|F]
Created: Sun Aug 7 20:08:04 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wnydb/feeling_so_happy_with_my_body_right_now_but/
---
I looked in the mirror Friday after getting dressed in some skinny jeans and saw it. IT. The thigh gap. The coveted fucking THIGH GAP. I squeeeealed in happiness! I wanted it so badly and suddenly I felt like I could be as pretty as the girl in the thinspo pictures wearing skinny jeans.
I took a progress picture today that I'm so proud of and happy with. Unfortunately I'm unable to share it with y'all due to the give away tattoos I have. I just wanted to share in some happiness with this sub and hope everyone out there is having a good night and keeping positive.
[Thinspo] Your weight does not define you, but you CAN define your weight
/u/throwawayyaymatehaha [5'3" | CW: 94 | 17.11 | -32 | F]
Created: Sun Aug 7 19:41:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wnuv1/your_weight_does_not_define_you_but_you_can/
---
Just another thinspo quote I made up just now
[Rant/Rave] I feel trapped by my ED.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Aug 7 19:26:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wnsw3/i_feel_trapped_by_my_ed/
---
I have spent most of this summer with my parents. I have spent most of my summer trapped in a house full of food. I tried to always eat under 1200 and vegan but sometimes I wasn't able to. I remember relying on restriction rather than purging and it's awful guys. I purge now. I am trapped in a house full of food, a stomach full of food, and a mind that is miserable. I'm sure you all know how awful it is to be forced into eating... I hate it. I can't wait to go back to school and just not eat for most of the day. Is it fucked up to miss being dizzy? I genuinely miss feeling faint, losing my breath, shivering in the Florida heat, and not being able to think properly. Now that I have just enough food to think I can't stop thinking. Every sense in my body is awake and alive and aware of how I feel when I eat-- and I feel like a failure. I'm only happy when I'm starving.
Can anyone else relate?
[Discussion] Age?
/u/Skinnystems
Created: Sun Aug 7 18:11:11 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wni8z/age/
---
Sorry if this has been asked before or if it's against any rules I'm unaware of, but I acknowledge that there are so many different kind of guys and girls here. Out of curiosity, I thought it would be interesting to comment your age.
I'm 22. 23 in September.
What about you guys? I'm curious as to how diverse this may be.
[Help] booked a dream holiday.. help!
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Aug 7 17:57:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wng99/booked_a_dream_holiday_help/
---
[removed]
[Tip] Anyone else obsessed with broccoli slaw?
/u/bchuk183 [5'6 | 140 | 22.6 | -10lbs | F]
Created: Sun Aug 7 17:01:27 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wn7r6/anyone_else_obsessed_with_broccoli_slaw/
---
I love it as salad or in broth. Anyone else have tips?
I'm working hard to reach my goal
/u/wwjccsd
Created: Sun Aug 7 16:39:42 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wn4dn/im_working_hard_to_reach_my_goal/
---
http://imgur.com/a/0e5lM
NSFW can see boxers :3
About me, I'm a 5'7 male who once reached 170 pounds. (I don't like to talk about that part of my life.) The first two pictures I am probably only around 150 and 145.
The middle I am around 135ish. The last two I am about 120. My goal is to reach 99 pounds.
Some people I have know in real life dont support me. But since finding this reddit I feel I can share without being shamed. I want to be as close to looking like a vampire as I can, thus my skin tone of snow white and skinnieness.
[Other] Teenage me loved this song. She could totally be singing to her ED.
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Aug 7 16:38:45 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wn48i/teenage_me_loved_this_song_she_could_totally_be/
---
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7CyuF9gv9Vs
That moment on MFP
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Aug 7 16:23:53 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wn1yg/that_moment_on_mfp/
---
[deleted]
[Intro] Breakfast of Champions
/u/Sonnenblumenschein [5'3.5" | 91.5 lbs | 16.0 | -63.5 lbs]
Created: Sun Aug 7 16:02:27 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wmylz/breakfast_of_champions/
---
http://imgur.com/17UUcVW
[Rant/Rave] This subreddit possibly saved my life
/u/Alexa1p [5'5'' | 110 | 18 | -10.7 | F]
Created: Sun Aug 7 15:43:38 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wmvmv/this_subreddit_possibly_saved_my_life/
---
Or at least possibly saved me a trip to the hospital.
I have been taking the EC stack. I've also been taking Adderall. Yesterday I had the bright idea of combining them. I even lightly googled the two and found nothing that seemed to imply they would be dangerous together.
I'd like to thank u/gazdaman1, u/GingerrWithASoul, u/In_a_fatsuit, u/feli0n, and u/noodleworld who all warned me that this is A TERRIBLE IDEA, and it can cause all sorts of health problems.
I was lucky yesterday, and nothing happened to me. But I was planning on going running, and if I hadn't posted to this sub, that could have ended very badly.
I also probably would have continued to take Ephedrine & Adderall together on a regular basis.
I am so thankful this subreddit exists. I hope anyone who is viewing this and is of the opinion this place should be shut down will perhaps re-examine that belief.
What kind of ED do you have?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Aug 7 15:22:20 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wmsj8/what_kind_of_ed_do_you_have/
---
[deleted]
Dealing with ED in dormitory?
/u/sprinkle1997 [5'1 | CW 138 GW 100 | -18 lbs | 19F]
Created: Sun Aug 7 15:01:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wmpf9/dealing_with_ed_in_dormitory/
---
I finished my first year in college living in a dormitory. Being around my roommate who I'm close friends with and always having other friends around, it was really hard to avoid eating normally as to not worry people. Naturally, I gained a lot of weight. Since I've been home for the summer I dropped about 15 lbs. I'm having anxiety about going back to school because I'm deathly afraid of gaining weight, esp since I want to reach my UGW or at least get somewhere near it by February if possible. I find it so much harder to lose weight at school. All my friends eat whatever they want and don't seem to gain a pound, it makes me feel terrible about myself esp since theyre naturally so skinny! I try to pick healthy options in the caf but the veggies are all drenched in oils, butters or seasonings so it doesnt do any justice.. Any tips on what foods I can/should keep with me to eat there to avoid eating all the fatty junk in the cafeteria and be able to eat around my friends without gaining again?
[Discussion] How did your ED start?
/u/monsterblink [5'6" | 144 | 23.6 | -36 | F]
Created: Sun Aug 7 14:36:23 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wmlfu/how_did_your_ed_start/
---
Distract Me--Worst road trip of my life
I'm stuck in a car, surrounded by people who actually eat. I skipped breakfast. I'm on my third monster of the day and we still have 7 hours left on the road. They got fast food for lunch. I had a salad and water. I've eaten six sticks of cinnamon gum. They have junk food in the car. Oreos and cheese puffs. They are all so unhealthy. I'm trying to stay strong, but I need a distraction.
How did your ED start?
[Help] How to get back into the mindset and stick with it?
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Aug 7 14:28:51 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wmk7w/how_to_get_back_into_the_mindset_and_stick_with_it/
---
[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] Another weekend binge
/u/FaithHopeTrick [5'7 | CW 124 GW 119 |19.35 | -31lbs | F]
Created: Sun Aug 7 14:24:19 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wmjgm/another_weekend_binge/
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For the second weekend running I have binged so much. Reckon about 3,500 calories today. I mean well but then every weekend we have plans with friends that revolve around food it's so hard. It took me until Thursday to recover from last week, God I feel like such a failure. I'm not going to reach my September goal. I don't even deserve to. I can feel myself slipping into the habit of feeling 'happy' when I'm full again. I must stop this. I can't let myself return to my former habits.
I really hate myself. I'm so fucking unhappy. I want to not weigh myself tomorrow so I don't have to know what a whale I've become, but it makes me feel panicked not knowing.
Sorry I just needed to vent. There's nobody else I can talk to
[Other] Soda water saving lives day n' nite<3 (other)
/u/commtra [5'7 | GW:110 | -11 | F]
Created: Sun Aug 7 13:54:03 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wmeky/soda_water_saving_lives_day_n_nite3_other/
---
https://i.reddituploads.com/85c1c2d3c5be4245bde04a17cfe3233e?fit=max&h=1536&w=1536&s=aead219b8395a70be35371c3c414f902
[Discussion] What counts as a thigh gap?
/u/minamasood [5'6.5"| 111lbs| 22F]
Created: Sun Aug 7 13:05:02 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wm6hj/what_counts_as_a_thigh_gap/
---
Totallu unbent knees, slightly bent knees, knees touching, not touching? How do you stand when you're checking for a gap?
At this point the very top of my thighs don't touch unless I'm crossing my legs, but the middle sometimes touches depending on how I stand.
[Help] How is this even possible??
/u/vhenah [5'7 | 141.8 | 22.13 | -78.2 | MOO]
Created: Sun Aug 7 12:46:57 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wm3jb/how_is_this_even_possible/
---
I binged last night - sort of planned tbh so there's some guilt there but at the same time I was feeling ok because I was going to fast any weight/water weight off. BUT the kicker is - even after a burger, fries, nuggets, soda, and a giant ass kitkat bar I get dizzy just by standing up??? It's actually more severe than usual? I was getting ready to shower - keep in mind I had just started the water so no steam or heat that I thought was excessive - and I got so lightheaded that everything felt muffled and hazy. I was sitting there thinking to my body: 'I JUST put food in you - fucking chill.'
I'm literally so confused, I was going to fast today but I have to see family so that's a wash - probably for the best considering the dizziness. I'm sucking on a piece of rock sugar just so I can feel ok driving there (it's not a long ride, dw). Does this happen to anyone else? Or does my body just like to drive me up a fucking wall any way it can lol?
[Discussion] Zoodle recipes?
/u/YourChinaDoll [5'1" | SW: 169 | CW: 130.4 | F]
Created: Sun Aug 7 11:27:28 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wlr04/zoodle_recipes/
---
Hello everyone! I finally broke down and got a zoodle maker. Does anyone have any fun zoodle recipes? I don't eat meat, but otherwise I'm willing to try whatever you throw at me!
[Discussion] Daily Food Diary! August 07, 2016
/u/AutoModerator
Created: Sun Aug 7 10:02:21 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wle6x/daily_food_diary_august_07_2016/
---
This is a daily food diary thread for August 07, 2016.
You do not necessarily need to wait until the end of the day to post all your meals. You can post now and then edit. Please include calories.
A possible format:
* **Breakfast**
* **Lunch**
* **Dinner**
* **Snacks**
* **Total:**
A calorie estimate/calculation is encouraged!
Don't forget to update the [Leaderboards](http://www.weightlosscompetition.eu.pn/index.php) with your calorie counts and binges!
[Discussion] I love being sick
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sun Aug 7 09:57:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wldji/i_love_being_sick/
---
[deleted]
[Rant/Rave] I gained this month :[
/u/kpatable [5'9" | 125.1 | 18.1/18.5 | -21.9 | F]
Created: Sun Aug 7 09:18:30 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wl7wt/i_gained_this_month/
---
My average weight last month was 124.1, and today my average of the past week is 124.6. So I've gained half a pound. I know it's not a lot, relatively. But I'm still bummed. I want to keep losing, like most of us do. And the fact that I've officially gained disappoints me. And it scares me. I don't want this trend to continue. And it shouldn't. I don't know exactly how many calories a day I'm eating, but, judging from how hungry/full I feel throughout the day, it's a healthy amount but still below my tdee. I could be wrong, but I'm willing to risk it for now.
Idk. I just wanted to vent about this. It could be A LOT worse. But it still sucks.
[Rant/Rave] Banana chip woes.
/u/Nude-prude [5"6.5 | 105 lbls | 16.68|-40| female]
Created: Sun Aug 7 08:17:26 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wkzzv/banana_chip_woes/
---
Drunk and wanting a snack last night , I decide to be a good citizen and go for the healthier alternative .... Or so I thought .
100g of banana chips ! Yum!
Like 600 cals?!
Bleh.
[Intro] Intro and advice seeking
/u/ED2134
Created: Sun Aug 7 08:04:19 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wky9h/intro_and_advice_seeking/
---
Hi if been lurking for a couple of weeks, thought I introduce myself ;)
I also need some advice on how to handle a situation with my bf concerning my ED.
Backstory: I guess I have an ED since I was 12. I had a couple of years of total restricting, only eating if I was "forced" because family was around. That went on till 15 or 16 when my mum intervened. When I wasn't able to restrict as I used to, mia became a close friend. At around 20 I realised that this wasn't a lifestyle I wanted to continue ( I nearly choked to death on my own puke while throwing up). But quitting wasn't as easy as I thought. I stopped throwing up, but I never really stopped the binge eating. I constantly gained weight. I minded it a lot, but I figured it is just temporarly and that I could take of that as soon as I had the situation under "control".
Fast forward: Im almost 28, severly overweight and every time I try to go on a healty diet, I end up purging and binge eating.
My bf is one of 2 peopple who know about my ED. He knows how uncomfortable I'm with my body. He knows how afraid I am of getting into the lifestyle of mia again. And he knows that everytime I try to loose weight I end up in a bad place. The only thing that actually works ( but slowly) is exercising. But even there I need to be careful, because my ED Brain tells me it would be better to exercise and restrict, because it goes faster... and sooner or later I end up binging and throwing up. So my bf knows ALL that. And at the beginning he told me that he does not have a problem with that, and he does not have a problem with my weight. He just wants me to be happy.
Skip forward: Today he told me, that he loves me and that he wants to have a future with me and wants to spend his life with me (yay ;) ) but that I needed to loose weight because he doesnt like it. He wants his gf to wear thight sexy dresses in the summer and to pick her up and carry her around..
My problem is: He is right. I need to loose weight. I need to feel more comfortable. I need to be more healthy.
But all the reasons he named are superficial ones for him. And hearing that from a person who claimes to love me and knows my history hurts a lot. It feels like an ultimatium. I worry that this is turning into a toxic situation for me.
What if I can't deliver? What if I can't loose weight fast enough? What if I loose weight but don't look like he anticipated it?
IT makes me incredibly sad and hopeless.
[Help] Appetite suppressants in the UK?
/u/FakingReallyWell [5'5.5" | 134 lbs | 22.1 | -22 lbs | F]
Created: Sun Aug 7 07:42:42 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wkvn9/appetite_suppressants_in_the_uk/
---
Hi guys. Hope you're all having a lovely weekend.
I just wanted to ask all you UK and european people what appetite suppressants you use.
I've tried searching this sub but it's very north america-centric and most of the recommendations are for bronkaid and primatine which I can't get where I live. I have ephedrine (which is amazing) but I'm running low and it costs £40 for 150x8mg tablets, which is a lot of money.
Searching the internet gives lots of other products that I can get easily but I'm aware that most of the products don't actually do anything beyond the placebo effect.
Anyone know of appetite suppressants and/or thermogenics that I can get in the UK that are actually legit?
[Rant/Rave] Went to a bowling meet and Denny's and ruined everything
/u/ClownLord-PlebMaster [5'8 | 145.6 | 22.0 | 27 lbs | F]
Created: Sun Aug 7 04:38:48 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wkdwl/went_to_a_bowling_meet_and_dennys_and_ruined/
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I went to a furry bowling meet and over all it was a great time. I got some art made of my character and met some cool people. The bad part was how many calories i had holy shit. So i drank like 3 root beers at the bowling alley. Then i got pancakes and bacon at Denny's and drowned it in syrup,i don't even want to think about how many calories all that was. Suffer time.
[Goal] I feel kinda good about my collarbones today
/u/outox [6' | 121.4 lbs | 15.80 | Male]
Created: Sun Aug 7 04:16:00 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wkbxc/i_feel_kinda_good_about_my_collarbones_today/
---
http://imgur.com/LLFay3d
[Thinspo] Your local art hoe is here with her extra pretentious™ thinspo (AKA I went to an art exhibition and found a few things you might like)
/u/usmatade [5'5 | 124 | 20.51 | -20 | F]
Created: Sun Aug 7 03:43:54 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wk9da/your_local_art_hoe_is_here_with_her_extra/
---
http://imgur.com/a/Y5dem
[Goal] being 5'1 & 118
/u/space0ddity [5'1 | 117.5 | 23.19 | -28.5 | F]
Created: Sun Aug 7 00:15:00 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wjqyb/being_51_118/
---
Looking @ thinspo & realizing you have at least 25 lbs to lose. Fuck. At least I can update my flair.when I get my laptop fixed..
[Rant/Rave] Who else...
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Aug 6 23:58:58 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wjpd2/who_else/
---
[deleted]
[Other] If only this was possible...
/u/[deleted]
Created: Sat Aug 6 23:15:09 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wjkt8/if_only_this_was_possible/
---
http://imgur.com/a/832JL
[Rant/Rave] Proud of myself
/u/operadiva31 [5'6" | CW 212.4 lbs | 34.42 | -25.2 lbs | UGW 131 lbs]
Created: Sat Aug 6 23:15:05 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wjkst/proud_of_myself/
---
So today has been a little weird food wise for me. I guess since my whole perspective is off with my scale fluctuating 10 lbs in days (talk about anxiety provoking), it's been tough for me to figure out why I'm still not losing while fasting. So today, I decided to just restrict instead. Started strong with a Vanilla Sweet Cream Cold Brew coffee from Starbucks (110 cal/grande). Then I went to the store around the corner from me and picked up two low cal gatorades, with which I made popsicles (10 cal each). Then I drank the second Gatorade (160 cal) on my way to pick up my bf from work so I wouldn't want to eat much at dinner. We went to this place that had small plates, and I got [lobster cones](http://imgur.com/gallery/AFunh) (160 cal each). I really really really wanted to binge after that, since I've been having visions of cheese dancing in my head all day, but I was able to actively resist stopping for binge food the entire drive home. I came home and had one of my 10 cal ice pops instead. I'm still slightly hungry, but I'm trying to put that out of my mind. Tomorrow the bf and I are going hiking, so that's hours of not having to eat, and exercising instead. :)
Edited to add: My total calorie intake for today was 940. Fitbit says I burned 2028 cal.
[Rant/Rave] Just a little [rant] from a live show tonight...
/u/holly-mint [5'4" 23F 🌹 waist-- H: 36", L: 27", C: 33", G: 25"]
Created: Sat Aug 6 23:03:29 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wjjjs/just_a_little_rant_from_a_live_show_tonight/
---
I am really annoyed. My partner's favourite band is playing their last show tonight and I still haven't seen them play so I promised I'd go. Then I got my period pretty bad, so I'll be spending the evening sitting in the corner with a bloated belly feeling overheated and desperately missing my bed and hot water bottle. Whatever, fine, it's one night.
There is a girl directly in front of me in the audience who looks exactly how I want to look. Same body type as me (wide hips) but MUCH thinner, same hair colour as me but MUCH longer (I am in the process of growing out an undercut so my hair is around shoulder length when I prefer to keep it just above waist length). Just... Ugh. I can't look away. Even if I do everything perfectly it will be at least a year until I look like that. I feel so fat, sick and useless :( sorry for the negative post, just figured you guys would understand the body image issues...
[Tip] Australian + vegan alternative to Halo Top
/u/sveltevelvet [5"8 | GW: 105-115 | -16 lbs | 18F]
Created: Sat Aug 6 21:51:51 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wjbi0/australian_vegan_alternative_to_halo_top/
---
I don't know how many Australians/N Zealanders follow this sub but I found an alternative to Halo Top. Some cities may stock it but this icecream is a lot more common.
It's Sanitarium coconut icecream, and it's 456 calories for a pint. Almost 200 cals more than Halo Top, but I'm glad I found it because I was sad about missing out on trying Halo Top. Woolworths stocks it. I think it's about $6 (kinda pricey), but it's so much more low cal than normal icecream.
I've eaten it in the past during a binge and I thought it would have been so many more calories.
http://www.sanitarium.com.au/products/milk-alternatives/frozen-desserts/so-good-coconut-vanilla
[Rant/Rave] im bad at wording my thoughts
/u/Mattynebula
Created: Sat Aug 6 21:24:53 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wj8dx/im_bad_at_wording_my_thoughts/
---
hey guys, long time lurker here and my first post ever. i just wanted to vent.
So im about 68lbs (was 64 until a really bad bp) and 5'1. I have been to the hospital for low potassium and ever since then my mom has been on my ass on what i eat. i typically bp 6 times daily its a constant battle i will always lose. with school starting soon im really scared how ill adjust. i cant tell anyone this obviously and my best friend doesnt seem to understand or try to at least. can anyone help me with maybe limiting how big my binges are? they usually last 2 hours
[Discussion] How do you guys handle dating?
/u/couldbefatter [5'2" | 105]
Created: Sat Aug 6 20:35:45 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wj29l/how_do_you_guys_handle_dating/
---
I'm dating a guy who is straight up thinspo, but somehow eats 3500+ calories a day. Anyway, dating usually involves eating together almost every time you see each other, so how do you guys manage this?
My current plan is to just restrict when we're not together and eat "normal" with him. I don't know how maintainable that's going to be though.
[Rant/Rave] Drunk and hyper aware
/u/sorryqueen [5'2" | a boulder | F]
Created: Sat Aug 6 20:05:46 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wiya6/drunk_and_hyper_aware/
---
Hello my friends. I'm slightly drunk and am hyper aware of everything that I hate on my body. It also doesn't help that I haven't been drunk in months and I over ate on things that I haven't touched in months as well. So much chocolate. So much buttery popcorn. I think I'm dying my stomach hurts so bad. Water for the rest of the night.
Take care y'all. Love and hugs from your favorite very sleepy and worried girl.
[Discussion] What small things are you grateful for today?
/u/sveltevelvet [5"8 | GW: 105-115 | -16 lbs | 18F]
Created: Sat Aug 6 20:04:05 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wiy29/what_small_things_are_you_grateful_for_today/
---
I intend to make this a little positivity post. Hope it's relevant to the sub. I've just been thinking very negatively lately.
What small things are you grateful for, that distract you from your ED? It can be superficial, anything you like.
I'm grateful for: having a warm bed, pretty lacy lingerie, and coffee.
[Rant/Rave] I've been failing [rant/rave]
/u/Superderg
Created: Sat Aug 6 20:00:23 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wixje/ive_been_failing_rantrave/
---
Can't flair on mobile.
I had an amazing week last week, stated under 1000 calories each day, exercises regularly, felt awesome. Then I had a mental issue- bit of a breakdown, binged. Then just a really emotional week where I've binged to some degree every night. I feel like shit. But I'm going to do better starting tomorrow. Refilling the fridge with good stuff, doing a good prep day, allowing time to bike/hike. Tonight's binge was good though, after filling up on cupcakes, Mac and cheese, and pulled pork I realized I really just wanted an Apple with peanut butter and some soup. So I'll be making lots of yummy soup for this week tomorrow. And will get back on track!!
[Rant/Rave] I hate my ED.
/u/peanutbutteredbanana
Created: Sat Aug 6 19:54:36 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wiwrg/i_hate_my_ed/
---
I thought I'd be happier at a weight of 95 pounds. My hip bones and ribs are prominent. I was supposed to be happy, thin, and pretty by now but everyday my depression worsens, the image in the mirror gets fatter, and I get uglier. Maybe 5 more pounds will help me feel better, but I'm scared I'm losing control. Nothing I can ever do will be good enough for my ED, it consumed me whole and isn't going to ever leave me. I feel like the only thing I can identify as is anorexic. That's all I am anymore. I am a jumbled mess of calories and fat and self hatred. Fuck eating disorders. :( sorry, just needed to rant.
-no flair sorry, on mobile
[Other] I think my younger sister developed ED because of me... I don't know what to think of it.
/u/cheeekyslug [5'6" | UGW: 90 | -60 lbs since 6/20/16 | 19/F]
Created: Sat Aug 6 19:49:40 2016
Permalink: http://reddit.com/r/proED/comments/4wiw28/i_think_my_younger_sister_developed_ed_because_of/
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My sister is literally one of my best friends because we're only a year apart and we were never the competitive type, we're actually pretty supportive. We're about 400 miles away from each other but I tell her about my ED issues.
And she's going to UCLA as a chemical engineering major! I'm literally so proud of her. But she told me she was really self conscious because everyone at UCLA pretty much looks good and she has too much of an bulky, athletic body. "I just want to be thin and smaller calves", she told me.
Her BMI is 21.8. She probably runs like 100 miles a week but she's been having a lot of trouble getting rid of fat because of her diet. Her cross country team have a huge appetites and usually goes on pasta and fast food outings. So I just told her count your calories and take little carbs if possible (kinda impossible in a Filipino household tho).
Today, she texted me she found Nike Pro's spandex shorts on sale and she bought me a couple. I asked her how her diet is going and what she ate today and said water and a small bowl of brown rice. Apparently she's lost 10lbs in 3 weeks and she's really close to her goal. I asked her how she was and she said she was constantly dizzy and that her lower back constantly hurts. Just from that I know that she's not eating enough and dehydrating herself. And I asked her what she was going to for the rest of the night and she said was going to the gym to cycle... and I know she runs 5 miles UPHILL and 5 miles back already.
Like wtf.
I feel a bit of me selfishly thinks this okay... because now I have someone close that to relate ED issues with. And she's going to look good at UCLA being the smart and independent engineer I know. And if anything, she's probably better at restriction because she has more willpower than I do.
I feel like I should have no opinion because I'm struggling with an ED myself. I also feel like that this is partially my fault. At what point she I try to intervene? Or should I just let her figure it out on her own?